Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 119 - Lauren Martin

Episode Date: June 22, 2010

Lauren Martin returns to talk Justin Bieber, astrology, and we stuntcast Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode 119 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is the gentleman who just made a million dollars selling Vuvuzelas during the World Cup, Mr. Dave Shumka. Yeah, a lot of people were going to go with those noisemakers that you spin around in your hand.

The New Year's Eve ones? Yeah, and the the glasses that have the year on them with two soccer balls yeah i thought bigger yeah and you said more b sound yeah more buzzings i guess that's a b sound and with us as uh yeah this uh guest second time to the podcast a very very, very... Number two. Yeah, number two, right? This is going to be a longer one. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Was your first one short? No. No, I was just making a number two joke. Oh. Bad way to start the podcast.

Yeah, filth. Local filth mouth and comedian. Miss Lauren Martin. Hi, Graham. Hi, Dave. Hi, Lauren. Thanks for coming back. Thanks for having me. Oh, it's our pleasure. Would you like to start off by getting to know us?

I'd love to get to know you. Get to know us. Lauren was saying, speaking of gender roles, before we even started the podcast, that you were predicted by a medicine woman that you were going to be a boy. A witch doctor? A medicine... A soothsayer? A dream catcher?

A palm reader? A grasshopper? My mom ran away up north for many years. I think we talked about this on the last podcast. Yeah, your mom's always running. She's a great lady. She does all these astrology. And when she was pregnant

She just wanted to have my fortune read So she saw someone who predicted Who predicted my future My great grandfather read tea leaves But he had already passed away So she went to The local psychic And they did really good

They predicted I'd be a boy. Wow. They did do very well. Yeah. Because well, I got balls. Sure. I got balls. That was the name of that company that originally manufactured Nooticles. I got balls.

I got balls. But you're not. You're not a boy. I'm a girl. You're a girl. And what boy I'm a girl And what a girl So what's going on lately for Lauren Martin? What's the scoop? What's the skinny? I saw you at a show last night Yeah we were at the Comedy Mix last night

Is that what it's called? It's the new Comedy Club They have nice TVs And it's called the Comedy Mix because... Because there's no reason for it. When I first got a phone call from them, I programmed the number into my phone. And I immediately forgot the name of the club. So it's still on my phone as the Comedy Buzz.

Comedy Buzz. 94.9 on your FM dial. Comedy buzz. But I... That's all you heard on stage last night, too. It was just a dead buzz. Yeah. Well, there were a lot of boo-boos there.

Just like a waving flag, Dave. Just like a waving flag. But we... You said you were excited about the show today and you were going to have... You had planned today to see um a movie oh but you didn't i did what movie were you gonna see bailed oh but i love her she's she hears this she's gonna feel so bad she's like i'm so sorry we're gonna go see the karate kid oh with little starring kung Fu as karate. No.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, they are, aren't they? Yes. It's not karate. No, it's not karate. It's karate. And it's two and a half hours. Really?

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So I had to like, we had to plan ahead. And then she canceled. So I just spent the day watching The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Which is just as good. Which is almost better.

It's related. It's like seeing, because a young Will Smith in Fresh Prince of Bel-Air would have only been, what, maybe 10 years older than his son in current Karate Kid form? 20 when he started.

Yeah, I agree. Yeah, he was a young pup. I mean, yeah, but like, oh, he would have only been twice his son's age. But he didn't have Justin Bieber on. On the soundtrack? On the soundtrack.

And they have him on the soundtrack for the Karate Kid. That's what got me so stoked. He does like what Vanilla Ice did in Ninja Turtles. Right. Where it's just Bieber does like a kung fu rap. Yeah. In a bar. Go Karate Kid.

Go Karate Kid. Go. So did you, wait, did you see the movie or you didn't see the movie? I didn't see the movie. You went and saw,

you watched Freshman. Yeah, I just bought the soundtrack. I like soundtracks. Is that, you know what, I used to be really embarrassed because people who actually

care about music tend to look down on people who buy soundtracks but I really, I enjoy putting them on and then like seeing how long it takes people to guess what movie it's from this is what i do at home with my like movie store nerd friends all right so like see how many songs it takes yeah i'm like okay what what movie is this from and uh that's not bad actually it's not a bad game it takes a bit too long oh it's like a drinking actually. It's a fun game. That's not a bad game at all. It takes a bit too long for my life.

Oh, it's like a drinking game. Like a long sit type of game, right? Well, yeah. Or it's like a bonus game. Yeah, sure. If you win the first game, you get to play this game. And the first game is the game of love. The first game is the three questions you have to answer to enter my dungeon.

What are the three questions you have to answer to enter my dungeon. What are the three questions? The question's three. What's your favorite soundtrack? Who directed Citizen Kane? And was Bieber on that soundtrack? That used to be a qualifying question for Videomatica. When people would drop off their resumes, we'd say, Who directed Citizen Kane? And you'd be surprised that people didn't know that a lot of people that it was

lars von triers yeah well he directed the original and then they on video michael bay did the wasn't there a movie called citizen dick that's what i was thinking there's i know there's a movie out there called citizen dick wasn't that the band in Singles? That's right. That's exactly what I'm thinking of. Then there is another movie called Citizen Something. Ruth? Oh, yeah.

Wow. Citizen Ruth is so good. With Laura Dern? Yeah. She's awesome. She's also in the fabulous Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains, which was filmed in East Vancouver. And you guys need to fucking watch that movie.

Don't point at me. We need to fuck and watch that movie? Fucking watch that movie. Sorry. Wait a second. So what if you went to the video store and somebody applied and then you said, who directed Citizen Kane?

And they said the director of Citizen Ruth. Would you let them pass on like, you got it wrong, but you'd guess something equally... You chose an indie movie. Yeah. Like, hard to get. Something indier.

Yeah. Who directed Citizen Ruth? Oh. I don't know. I know it was the same person who directed Election. I know that. Oh, really? Yeah.

Fun facts about things. Yeah. Was it a woman who directed Election? I feel like it was. I don't know. No way of knowing. I don't know. No way of knowing. Please don't write in.

Speaking of writing in... Last week on the show... Yeah, we talked about... If you could use a hot dog on an iPhone. Or an iPod Touch. Yeah, because it stimulates... Simulates? Yeah, and apparently, yes, you can. Yeah, so stop writing in and telling us that. Thank you to

the 20-odd people who alerted us to that fact. Got it. They tried. Well, that's good. Participation. Yeah, make your move. No, but I'm wondering, because I was listening to the last show, but would it still work for running hot dogs through your hair?

Would that still cure loneliness? Because sometimes... Instead of fingers? I'm sometimes nights along. Yeah, but running fingers through your hair doesn't cure loneliness. Oh, I guess someone else's fingers. No, yeah, because you know it's your own fingers. That's the problem.

You can trick yourself into thinking it's someone else's hot dog fingers. Because then you can also feel like pimples and scabs on your scalp. So you kind of are like... You should probably just switch shampoos. So if you just took, say, like a rake and put five hot dogs on it and then just rubbed your head against it, that would make you feel better? Well, four hot dogs. Four hot dogs and maybe

a baby carrot is the thought. Yeah, it has to be at a different angle. Isn't there a film called Edward Penis Hands? I wouldn't classify it as a film. Is this one of your Videomatica questions that I have to answer to get a job? You know, true answer is yes, there is.

Listeners not in Vancouver, Videomatica is a video store, but kind of an arthouse video store. It's a really, really old, dusty video store. How many copies of Eraserhead did they have there? Like how many different versions of Eraserhead? Oh, like special edition. Deluxe special edition. Anniversary edition. Turbo. On a dual disc with a really shitty movie that you didn't want to buy.

Oh, really? You know when they do those two packs and it's like one really big movie? Yeah, like that guy who was shot. Two packs. I have a story about Tupac. He has a banana with the skin on. That's K-Pax. You got a story about Tupac? I have a story about Tupac.

All right. When the internet first kind of came out in 2004. Do you remember did everyone use like MIRC? Yeah.

Like a chat program, right? Yeah. I was on there chatting away. You were at number sign Tupac. And this guy no this guy who was number sign

Tupac or whatever he came on. I think the rooms were number sign and then whatever the topic. Yeah, that's probably where Twitter got it from. Almost.

Is that pound? Yeah. Pound. Pound Tupac. Yeah. And he came on and he's like, hey, I'm Tupac. Do you want to cyber with me? It's really lonely here in the grave and I was like yeah didn't you die

and he's like no I just faked it all Machiavelli style I faked it but please don't fake your orgasm small oh small oh small oh big oh I'm rubbing my penis through your hair my five penises small, oh, big old... I'm rubbing my penis through your hair.

My five penises. This got off to a bang. Yeah, it was great. So, what's been shaking? What's been going on? Well, I've graduated from shelling videos. Now we're making a movie. So I'm working on that this year.

So I was studying my lines. I was working on my character and stuff. And can you, is it, would it be against the production to let us know like what is the movie about? Okay, well, it's a local, it's going to be a local, very indie sort

of production. It's all based in Vancouver. It's all people from Vancouver. Laura Dern. Fabulous stains. Was that right? Yeah, and Diane Lane's in that movie, too. You can see her boobs. What? Local boobs. No, outside of town

boobs, locally. Yeah, filmed locally. Yeah, the best. Filmed locally, underage. She's underage in that movie. Wait, how old is this movie? Yeah, because Diane Lane is, she's in her mid-40s what how old is this movie yeah cause Diane Lane is she's she's in her mid 40s oh I thought you meant

Diane Weiss I think it was like 1980s so my why not write it why not sure

I was just watching Hannah and Her Sisters isn't she in that movie she is I don't know right yeah yeah yeah yeah

and she's so funny she's like this actor it's a total she's like yeah. And she's so funny. She's like this actor. She's like a caterer. She's a total failure. She's all like, I don't know why you guys are always judging me. I haven't done drugs in a year. And blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And she's like the crazy sister.

I'd like to apologize to any caterers. You're not failures. Yeah, especially if you own your own catering. Yeah, sure. Here's a question about catering companies. I'm just going to throw it out there. Yeah, especially if you own your own catering company. Yeah, sure. Here's a question about catering companies. I'm just going to throw it out there. Yeah. Does always a catering company have to have a clever name or a pun name?

Does it have to be like, The Butler Did It or Peak of Catering? Oh, The Butler Did It. You know what I mean? Is there just like Stan's Catering? Or would anybody hire Stan's Catering when you could have Butterfingers Catering instead, right? But they drop everything. That's true. Yeah, that's not a good name at all.

Ay carumba. Now, I understand you're making a movie. So my movie is about a guy who loves coffee. What's the working title of this picture? Do Something With Your Life. Okay. It's by Borotime Productions. And if you actually go on the website, you can see all our

short movies. Because we started out doing... Vancouver does all these 24-hour film festivals. Yes. I was in one one time, yeah. Well, I've been in a few. How many hours were it? 72? No, they're up to 72. I did a 24-hour once, and then I did a 48-hour, and now we're up to 72. You'd think that

with improved technology and video editing software yeah like a 5 hour film yeah but they actually wanted decent films because the first few years

they were all pretty hacked together were they not well like it would be an opening scene and then cut in some chunks of platoon

and then just a classic scene go on sorry I just no it's fine it's a it's a very exciting time in film and then just a classic scene. Sorry. No, it's fine. It's a very exciting time in film. In film? Yeah. So do something with your life.

Yeah. So we've done all these short films and then the writer Andrew Menzies wrote a feature and this guy loses his job. He loses his girlfriend. He loses his self-respect. Loses his mind probably a bit. Loses his way, would you say? Loses his job. He loses his girlfriend. He loses his self-respect. Loses his mind probably a bit.

Loses his way, would you say? Loses his way. I describe the film as man versus self. Okay, yeah. And I get to be the sassy love interest with a dirty mouth. So it's going to be a real stretch, guys. Yeah, you're very sassy. You know from you saying the F word and making a number two joke. Right off the top, yeah. You're very sassy. You sing the F word

and make a number two joke. Very filthy. Maybe this is Lauren being in character. I method. I so method. Have you started shooting yet? When do you start methoding up?

You gotta method up a few hours ahead of time. At least when you use methadone, because it only lasts about 12 hours. Then you start, the fuzz wears off, so you gotta... Do you think that Method Man does method acting? Just consider it.

Okay. So you're shooting this movie, you're gonna shoot it all summer? All summer long. This is an indie movie, though. Oh, all summer long, like the Kid Rock song. All summer long. Yeah. So it's not coming to Theater New You. Sure.

Hey, because I'm just, I love struggling in the trenches, right? However, I do have good news. Okay. The last podcast, I spent a long time talking about my favorite uncle. Yeah. And his career has really taken off since the podcast. I'm afraid of what you're saying. I mean, actually, he has a part in FUBAR, too.

There's going to be a FUBAR, too? Yeah, they're making a sequel to FUBAR because I had so many unanswered questions. Yeah, well, he... What happened to that bus stop they broke? Yeah. Jesse grew his hair back I know he kept his mustache but then he lost all his hair

you've seen Fubar yeah yeah our listeners may not have if you yeah for anybody not not only not of Canada but not of Western Canada Fubar was a movie about two like metalhead Calgarian guys and then

I thought they were from Winnipeg no it's calgary calgary it was filmed in my uh neighborhood that i grew up in all right foobar stands for fucked up beyond all recognition sure right so it's a term for being really drunk yeah so they got drunk well it's originally it was a war term correct correct thank you well you know what you're a smart man gram not really um but that film it centered around two kind of like a wayne and garth if they drank a lot and fought yeah and like i didn't finish high school and parts of the movie people didn't know that it was not uh a documentary because it was shot like a documentary and there were parts where they went into bars and everybody in the bar thought

they were shooting a documentary about these two guys but they were actually not. It was years and years before Borat ever was on the scene like it. So they're making a sequel. And your uncle is in the sequel. Playing hockey

and then... But playing... And your uncle is in the sequel. Yes. Playing. Playing hockey. And then. But playing. You lucked out that it was a sport. And he's wandering around this pawn shop that they're in. Yeah. And they were like. Spoiler alert. Yeah, spoiler alert. Yeah.

He doesn't say anything in the pawn shop, but. Yeah. But look for him. He's wearing like a. You've seen the dailies? What are those? Cowichan sweaters? A calico sweater.

Yeah, it's got thumbs. That's a polydactyl. And before the podcast started, we talked about a weird happening where, because I saw you in Calgary, incidentally. I was in Calgary.

You were in Calgary. I was in Calgary. I didn't know you were in Calgary. I didn't know you were in Calgary. Exactly. So just a bump into affair at a comedy show. And I was doing a show and there was a very drunk, you were on the show as well. I was first up.

Yeah, it was mostly drunk people, right? Very drunk people. It was snowing in Calgary. This was May 3rd or 4th. And it was snowing. Keep in mind. It's an awful place. So I think a lot of people were just staying put. I don't think the people were there for a comedy show, but they'd been there

for hours and hours. Sure, waiting out the snow. Waiting out the snow, so they were staying for the comedy show. Yeah, and then there was a guy who was super drunk who came quite intoxicated yeah and i chatted with him for most of my set because he was a very good sport he was a very funny guy into your yeah he walked up on yeah on stage and uh whatever stage there was and uh sat down right next to it yeah that's right and uh so I chatted with him for my whole set. Was there seating available to him? Yeah, oh, definitely. Yeah, more than enough.

Graham sort of said hi, and he thought that... Like that was an invite to walk into the set. Sure, okay. And so I spent the whole time talking to him, which he was a good sport, and he was funny. Yeah, he was a funny guy. Yeah, and then I saw him chatting with you, and then you guys ended up kind of... Going out the back door. Yeah, kind of a funny guy. Yeah, and then I saw him chatting with you, and then you guys ended up kind of...

Going out the back door. Yeah, kind of dating for a while. That's correct. Yeah. Well, I just, I like... He's... Did you know him before that? No.

No. That's what's so great about it. It's just, it's a one in a million story that probably would never happen ever again. Nobody else but me. So it was really interesting not only to see how the night developed but also to be

like, I think that guy is... But he's a nice guy. He's not always drunk. No, no, no, no. His kickball game had been canceled that night. Oh, on account of snow. Because he plays corporate kickball.

Oh, kickball's gotten so corporate. It used to be about the kickball. Now we have to listen to the Eagles. Yeah. Well, actually, I went and played a game with him the next week. He's like, you should come to my kickball game. That's how he was romancing me. Wow.

I know, it's very romantic. And we were playing against jack fm oh sure they play what they like which is kickball and they brought they brought a stereo that was like pumping jack fm while we were playing and avril lavigne came on like twice and i stand on third base and i was like so dude i'm just wondering who who keeps playing Afro-Levine? Burn! That was a lie. You may have broken the microphone. Worth it.

It won't be my first. Tell me about this kickball game. Were people taking it seriously? Some people take it really seriously. Were people wearing athletic really seriously but were people wearing athletic gear or were people wearing like

ironic short shorts and stuff well I ended up playing a few games with these guys and there was

a funny team that were wearing like pink shorts and shirts that said kick my bunt or something like you know

like clever shirts or whatever I don't know how clever that is no what does kick my bunt mean oh i was a play on dick my c word yeah like to draw on it yeah with a bit with a bit yeah because i only make three kinds of products lighters shavers and pens yeah oh right, why did I go with pens?

shavers would have been the obvious well doy nuts nerds so there was one funny team and then there was a singles team and they didn't seem like they were having any fun and my theory is that

they all joined the singles team and then they didn't like the selection. Yeah, that's a problem with the, I remember one time I did a show with a past guest, Lachlan Patterson. And it was this singles group that goes out and they go, like, they plan an activity. Like, this week we're canoeing. And everybody. And next week we're canoodling.

like this week we're canoeing and everybody and next week we're canoodling and we did uh one of the things was to go to a comedy show and they actually like booked the urban well which was the big comedy place at the time and we did a show and lachlan's a very handsome man and uh all the girls at this single thing spent the whole time trying to talk to Lachlan. And there was tables and tables and tables of guys sitting by themselves. So there's, yeah, you don't take a single vote. But if you join a singles kickball team and there's like no one you're into on the team, like do you have to stick it out the whole schedule? Do you have to go to every game yeah oh yeah oh you mean if you join the team that's just always kickball yeah it's not different

events yeah yeah that would be well why would you join if unless you like kickball oh i guess wouldn't you do it i like kickball and i hope to get laid yeah yeah you wouldn't be like i hope to get laid. Yeah. Yeah. You wouldn't be like, I hope to get laid first. I'll do anything. I'll kick anything. I'll kick anything. I'll kick any kind of ball. I don't care. So, yeah, no, it was a very, very romantic story.

Yeah. Yeah. We went to Callaway Park. Oh, Callaway Park, for listeners, is named so. It's an amusement park outside of Calgary. Is it named that for the golf clubs? No, it's named for it because it's away from Calgary. Oh. For real.

I always wondered what it was, and then an employee said, it's because it's away from Calgary. And I was like, surely you're joking. I think that's their own theory. No, well, you tell me then why is it named Callaway Park? Isn't Callaway some sort of place in Scotland? Yeah, but it just doesn't have a Scottish theme. It actually has a Flintstones theme.

Yeah, it used to be a Flintstones park, and then they lost the rights to that, but all the garbage cans still look like Flintstones. So they just painted over it. There used to be a Flintstones fun So they just painted over it. We used to have, there used to be a Flintstone Fun Park in like Chilliwack. Yes. And I don't think

they lost the rights to it. I think nobody cares. No, no, you don't want to piss off those Hanna-Barbera people. Yeah. They'll get snagglepuss on you. That was the other,

the weird Calgary artifact. There used to be like a TV station in Calgary called Two and Seven. Two and Seven and you. There you go. That song you're singing, they used to play at the beginning and the end of every broadcast day. It was like a song about how much they loved being in Calgary. And then I looked it up on YouTube. The song was called Hello, Calgary.

And then right underneath it, there was one called Hello, Milwaukee. And I clicked on it. Same fucking song. So they just shipped this song around to all these different TV stations. I'm sure people listening might be surprised that there's, when you say Jack FM, might be surprised. That there's a Jack in every city. Yeah, that there's a Jack FM outside of their town. Jack FM.

There's a Jack in every city. Yeah, there's a Jack FM outside of their town. Yeah, not only Jack FM, but you may be listening in New Jersey and you remember Hello New Jersey. And that song wasn't just for your city. But yeah, it's good. Glad to have you on the podcast. Thank you. And thanks for coming out and being a lady.

But if you're a guy, would have been just as good, I imagine. Just as good. Check out my pipes. Dave, what's going on with you? How are your pipes? They're fine. She used to have balls. Now she has pipes. She's decided that that's more radio-friendly.

I'm doing finely well. I'm doing well and fine. You were talking earlier about Justin Bieber on the soundtrack i saw justin bieber they replayed the uh snl that he was on a couple weeks ago yeah and uh i also saw him on the today show uh he did in his song um he's got these dancers that uh i don't think they they hang out a lot he and the dancers because they're in their 20s and he's a kid? Yeah, but also I think he is, he thinks he's too cool for them.

Which he probably is. Yeah, let's call it like it is. He is too cool for most people. Yeah, but he's got a line in one of the songs, in the big song, Baby. It's something about shaking me awake from a dream etc yeah uh and in the choreography for the song two dancers come up and shake them a bit yeah oh no and uh and then he shrugs them off does he pretend like he's dreaming just no he's still singing he's got to keep his eyes open okay so he doesn't put on a nightcap he has some sleepy time tea

so they they uh they grab his shirt and they shake him a bit yeah and he shrugs them off and uh they kind of do like uh a couple of seconds of hey what's up like just the dancers to themselves trying to get in trying to steal a bit of the spotlight yeah before they get back to their dance moves i don't like that well you to their dance moves. I don't like that. You don't like it? No. I don't like it either. Yeah, I don't like when the dancers try to get in on it or try to act.

Like to do a little acting. Yeah. Okay. I don't like that Justin doesn't do his own dancing. What do you mean? He's foot-sinking? There's some sort of foot-sinking going on with Justin Bieber. No, he doesn't dance. He stands and he points. SNL was my first initiation to the Bieber fever. And I was surprised because I was like, oh, this is like the new Justin Timberlake.

But better. But they didn't bother with the other four guys in NSYNC. He just has backup dancers. Yeah. They're replaceable. Exactly. Yeah. They're not even trying anymore.

They're not even packaging boy bands to kids. They're just like... Well, no. Yeah. They're replaceable. Exactly. Yeah. They're not even trying anymore. Like, they're not even packaging boy bands to kids. They're just like... Well, no, yeah. But he didn't come packaged. That's the... He's from, like, the backwoods of Quebec or something. The unique thing... It's for the bird crap.

That's why he doesn't know how to dance. He's a habitant. And he was born in a log cabin. Yeah. He eats nothing but maple syrup. But the thing that is unique about this kid is that the fans picked him kind of out of obscurity and made him into, yeah, into this big star. He wasn't manufactured, you know, sperm and egg, right? The way we all are manufactured.

But then beyond that. But he wasn't molested by Lou Pearlman. Yeah, no, there was no... And so that's why he said... Rhea Pearlman, actually. She's got her dirty paws on everything. Tiny little paws. Didn't he get...

He got a tattoo or something. Is he old enough to get a tattoo? No, but he's cool enough. Not if he was my kid. Yeah, but he kind of like... He was my kid. He got one down near the belt line, like where a girl would get one.

And it was of something, like I think it was a heart. He kind of looks like a girl. I know I'm not the first one to say it. I'm not pretending I'm the first one to say it. There's a whole blog that's devoted to lesbians who look like Justin Bieber. Oh, really? Yeah.

The haircut is the thing that I hear most often being derided about. Like that he's got the straight across. But then if you look at old pictures of John Lennon and Paul McCartney, they had the exact same haircut. So all I'm saying is if the haircut makes the man. Yeah. Then he's the next Beatles. Yeah. Wrapped up into one perfect package.

What's the Eenie Meenie Miney Moe Lover is one of his songs? I don't know it. Is it Email My Heart? That's not a song, is it? That was a Britney Spears song from her first album. Really? I don't think I've ever heard it, but I just remember that being like the epitome of just, let's take a current technology, make a pop song about it, give it to a starlet. So that's, but that's the reverse.

It's like, let's take something that kids know, eeny, meeny, miny, moe, and just put lover at the end of it. Yeah, sure. You're my bubba black sheep lover. You're my eye spy with my little eye lover. So you saw some beavers dancing. Ten beavers dancing. Sure. That was troubling.

The dancers were trying to steal his thunder. Yeah. But basically, I see a lot of attitude from backup dancers. I just remember, I can't think of any specifics, but like, Britney Spears definitely had one backup dancer who had like frosted tips. She slept with that guy. No, that was Kevin Federline. No, the reason she and Justin Timberlake broke up is she had an affair with one of her backup

dancers. Oh, probably the guy who tried to steal the spotlight. Yeah. Wade. His name was Wade Wade totally I've known a Wade or two

so is that all that happened that didn't even happen this week it was weeks ago I mean it still has happened but you know let's talk about movie soundtracks oh I week. It was weeks ago. I mean, stuff's happened, but you know. Let's talk about movie soundtracks.

Oh, I really like the Fantastic Mr. Fox soundtrack. It's great. Any Wes Anderson movie. Yeah, that's true. That's too easy almost. He stalks the soundtracks. He probably has the soundtrack before he has the movie. Yeah, he is. Yeah, so what do you mean that's too easy? I like Dumb and Dumber the soundtrack. He probably has the soundtrack before he has the movie. Yeah, he is.

Yeah, so what do you mean that's too easy? I like Dumb and Dumber's soundtrack. Peter Pumpkinhead, why not? Sure. She's a vegetarian. Oh, yeah, who sang that one? I don't know. Dumb and Dumber.

Dead Eye Dick. It was Dead Eye Dick. Dead Eye Dick. That's who I meant when I said Citizen Dick. Sure. It all comes full circle. Yeah, wasn't Peter Pumpkinhead head that was crashed as dummies? And then there was another...

What's the song that they sing that... Mock. Yeah. Was that on the soundtrack? I don't know. I'll just turn your mic down. You should just turn my mic off. I don't know what you're trying to your mic. You should just turn my mic off. I don't know what you're trying to say, Graham.

What do you mean? Like, I don't know. You haven't finished a sentence. For a long time? Have I just been fuffering? It wasn't there. Oh, God. And then.

Oh, God. Never mind. Okay. How are you, Graham? Yeah, let's get to know you. I feel like we've reached the Bieber fever pitch. Bieber saturation. Bieber fever pitch. Bieber saturation. Bieber mania.

Yeah, what happened this week? I played a show during – we touched on very briefly on the last episode that UFC was in town. Oh, yeah. And I played at a comedy club downtown during the UFC tournament or whatever. Not at the UFC tournament. Not to my recollection. It was at the same club you guys were at last night, the Comedy Buzz.

Yeah, sure. 2.9 on the FM dial. And we... It was myself and two other comics and the Thursday night there was like 12 people there. It's a new club. Still trying to find its legs or feet or people to sit there.

And then I really thought the UFC thing would be more horrible downtown. But it was the lead up seemed to be the more horrible part. Thursday and Friday night, there were gigantic men everywhere. Like more than you. It was the lead up seemed to be the more horrible part. Thursday and Friday night, there were gigantic men everywhere. Like more than... It was raining them. Yeah, yeah. It was like what you would see the amount during wartime. Sure.

Like a lot of giant... VJ day. Yeah, yeah. They were at a parade. Everyone was kissing a nurse. Or threatening to beat one up. Sure. So yeah, it wasn't as catastrophic as most of the people that were in the audience were in town to see UFC.

They were staying in Vancouver over the weekend. And then I heard there was a couple, like, things where people got beaten up and stuff over the weekend. Predictable. Fairly. and stuff over the weekend. Predictable. Yeah, and so, you know, that was exactly what the people who didn't want it to come here to town,

they're like, people are coming to town to beat people up and people are like, that won't happen. And then that's exactly what happened. And a big fucking surprise. And, of course, one of them was a gay couple in their... Were they both men? In front of their house?

Were they both men? Both of the gays? What do you mean, like a guy and a girl who are both gay but hanging out together? That's how you form a couple. You need a man and a woman. Oh, Dave. I'm sorry, I'm not familiar with your

urbane ways. Well, it was a man and me. I'm not pretty much a man. It was two dudes at their own apartment. And there was two guys pissing on their front door. Oh, my gosh. And they said, please don't. I imagine that's exactly how it went down.

Please don't piss on our front door. And then they got the shit kicked out of them. So, you know, I'm not saying that people that like UFC are into that kind of thing because they're not. Right. But... Here's a question. If you're peeing on someone's door...

Okay. ...and they tell you to stop... Yeah. ...do you finish peeing before you start beating them up? I think if there's two of you, you let one kind of lead and then you save up your pee

to pee on the person who you just knocked down. I would just be flying. Flying? You're going at them with a fist. And pee both going at them. Sure. It's your superpower.

For those at home that can't see, Lauren's idea of punching is sending out both hands at the same time in a Superman-like fashion. No, this hand had my dick in it. is sending out both hands at the same time in a Superman-like fashion. Or Donatello. No, this hand had my dick in it. Is that your dick?

I thought it was Pete. Is that your dick? It's pretty long. So yeah, it's a telescope. It's stretched out. But the other thing I did was I went and saw a movie. I heard about this. It was obscure because I hadn't really heard about it.

And somebody said, oh, you should see it. It's really neat. It was the Banksy movie, Exit Through the Gift Shop. Right. Oh, yeah. Have you seen it? No. No, I haven't.

Banksy is a popular street artist. He's a street artist. Or he or she. Yeah, that's true. Because in the movie, whoever is Banksy or if it's somebody playing Banksy,

you don't ever see their face and you don't hear their voice. It's all scrambled. And again, don't you not really know if it's a true documentary

or if it's a film? Yeah, at the end of the movie, it's made like a documentary because I didn't know what it was about. And then at the very end, I go, wait a that a whole was that whole thing fake did i just sit through like a two-hour thing and then thinking it was real up until the last half hour and then going wait a minute it's a sasha baron cohen character uh it was really enjoyable though

because i didn't it was again like i'm never reading any movie reviews ever again, because they just ruin the fun out of everything. So I'm just going to, the next time I see a movie that the poster looks good, or I think it might, I'm just going to go. No more movie reviews. What about trailers? I hate trailers. Yeah, that's true. They give away too much of the...

Yeah. They give all the best parts. The Zazazoo, as they would say in that trailer for Sex and the City 2. Sex in Egypt. Sex in the Emirates. Prince of... Anyways. But yeah, I would highly recommend it if it's playing in your town, which I don't know if it's...

Or a computer. Yeah, or if it's playing in your computer let it out into your head and ears yeah and that's about it I really thought that the UFC thing would be more terrible and it was less terrible than I had

secretly hoped I kind of hoped it would be more crazy you were hoping there weren't isolated incidents but just widespread. Yeah, I wanted a riot. Not one where anybody gets hurt, but just one where stuff gets broken. Yeah, cars get tipped over. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Cows get tipped over. Or cows tip over cars. Like when it gets really crazy, like there's just cows and cars. Like at the Running of the Bulls. You only get those riots in Alberta. I've heard. I know somebody who's going to the running of the bulls this year. Is it still to come this year? Oh, you know what? I don't

have it penciled in. So you didn't send your bull a card this year? It's either the Tomatina or the running of the bulls that's coming up at the end of the month. Tomatina comes up at the end of summer. I know that is a fact. That's the tomato fight. And then, isn't there one coming up at the end of the month. Tomatina comes up at the end of summer. I know that is a fact. Is that with the tomatoes? Yeah. And then, wasn't there

one with, like, ink in India or something? Yeah, Squidsville, Tennessee. Sure. Yeah, anyway. You know someone going to the running of the bulls? Yeah, do you think that that's, does that sound like a horrible idea? Not if you're in really good shape. What? I'd say.

Like, how good shape? Like, bull shape? Like, can you run how many blocks? Can you run? Well, don't you have to, like, I've never watched I've only ever seen clips of it. I don't know if it's like a blocks long event or if, like, you make

it after one block, you can just, like, duck into a Or it's like the Tour de France, where it just goes on and on for days. There's doping. But no, it seems like it's sort of been done to death. Now it's

like a midlife crisis, bucket list sort of thing. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Those poor bulls. Do you think that's on any bulls bucket list? If it gets to get one of the humans, probably. those poor bulls do you think that's on any bulls bucket list run over some humans if it gets to get one of the humans probably

finally my dreams are coming true why not if anybody deserves to hate us it's them did you see that picture of the guy with the

bullfighter who got the yeah I felt good about that with the horn through the jaw that's what you were talking about

it came out of his mouth really a matador so a guy who was basically begging for a bull to do that to him. I'm a bull. I'm a Taurus. Okay. And so I relate to those little bulls.

And what year is this? And you're a boy. No, that's the time of the year. That's the... It's the year of the tiger. April, May. Yeah, no, I know, but what year is it? Oh, you wouldn't ask a lady that.

No, it's the year of the tiger, not the year of your birth. Oh, what year is it? Oh, you wouldn't ask a lady that. No, it's the year of the tiger, not the year of your birth. Oh, what year I was born. Oh, man. It's the year. You made a point of saying that. We're drinking tiger beer. Delicious tiger beer. She's a very astrological lady.

Yes, yes. And it's the year of the tiger. And so I was given the advice that you should really, it's a year to really work hard and put your nose to the grindstone because there's a lot of action happening. Sure. The other 11 years take the year off. Yeah.

Relax. Reflect. My auntie, my auntie Marilyn. I know, I always, I'm sorry. Are you a baby? My family all the time. My auntie, she's so funny. She was born in the year of the tiger.

Well, that's correct. So she's like 24? Yeah. And my mom was born in the year of the rabbit. And so they kind of sometimes butt heads, right? Or more so the tiger kind of eats the rabbit. Is that because of the year they were born or because they're both human beings? And one time she's telling me she's like

she's like well you know she just doesn't understand because because i'm a tiger and that's how i am you know i cut right to the chase i'm a tiger and i was like that's hey that's cool i understand and then she's like i'm also endangered and i like to swim a couple hours later we're going to the ice cream store and i was was like, hey, Auntie Marilyn, what kind of ice cream do you want? She's like, I only eat Tiger ice cream. Yeah, seriously. She's the only person. I was born in the year of the mint chocolate chip.

I only eat Frosted Flakes because they got Tony the Tiger on them. You guys thought I was going nowhere with that. No. And then I was like, oh, wait, wait. At no point am I worried that you're going nowhere with that No And then I was like Oh wait wait It's good At no point am I worried That you're going nowhere with anything I know it's gonna go somewhere

I didn't know it was gonna go Which is great Graham and I were both Both born in the year of the monkey Really? That's why I like you guys So we throw our feces at each other? Yeah

And we can learn to smoke cigarettes If given enough time Yeah Sure Yeah And sign language Yeah Well that's gorillas Yeah at each other. Yeah, and we can learn to smoke cigarettes if given enough time. Yeah, sure. And sign language. Well, that's gorillas. No, we can't learn sign language.

We can say, Amy likes you, and then trick the humans to going into the conco. We wear diapers. And you go to space. Yeah. And we die. And we kind of look like George Burns if you put us in a suit. Maybe a cigar. uh we both really like david schwimmer um so do you want to get uh do some overheard i would love to do some overheards overheard overheards uh in the tradition of the overheard segment we like to ask that the guest go first.

Oh. And you told me via email that you had a juicy one from a hockey game. And usually we mention what an overheard is. Oh, let me tell you about it. An overheard is those little tiny snippets. Nuglets. Nuglets. Sniglets.

Nards. Nards. Romulans. That you hear just in passing. Maybe you hear them... Out of context. Yeah. Perhaps.

Sometimes in context. But they're those things... Sometimes too much context. Yeah. And they're hard to relate in everyday life, but this is the forum for it. Or if you don't like our podcast, Greg Fitzsimmons has a segment. Yeah. We recommend his. Yeah. I has a segment. Yeah, yeah. That you can enjoy.

We recommend his, yeah. I've never listened. Neither have I. What? Well, I can't overhear about his show. I can't overhear. It's too much. Too much rage.

But Lauren, you said you had a great one. I'm excited. We like to start with the guests. I have never heard from... It was during hockey playoffs? Uh-huh. And it was when I was still in Calgary. Oh, yeah.

This is getting more Canadian by the minute. Oh, yes. I went for a Calgary corporate lunch. Wait a minute. Is that like a corporate kickball game? Yeah. It was me meeting some people who work in an office for lunch. And then the lunch lasted nine hours.

What? I don't work in an office. Drinking? I know. Is that what corporate lunches are? for lunch and then the lunch lasted nine hours of drinking. I know. Is that what corporate lunches are? It's where you just never go back to the office. Oh, because you're a cog in a machine and you won't be missed. I've only ever worked at small companies where they're like, where have you been?

Yeah, that's true. You're like, I was in the bathroom. I was crying. I have IBS. Needed some time. I was in the bathroom. I was crying. I have IBS. I have IBS. Needed some time. I had a corporate lunch. I have corporate IBS.

So we were drinking in the bar in the middle of the day, and the hockey game was on. And I overheard a guy at the bar, and he was quite drunk. And he was like, have you ever been to Montreal? Let me tell you, it is a great place to riot. Fact. I thought he was going to be like, it's a great place to visit,

great place to play hockey, but he was really hoping for the riots to kick in. They didn't riot. Or they did. They did a little bit. Only when they won. They didn't riot. Or they did. They did a little bit. Only when they won. They didn't riot when they lose. Those Frenchies, right? We riot when we lose.

But we didn't riot this year. We've only really rioted once. That one time. It seems like there's a lot of elements in perfect... It's like a recipe like you really have to follow the directions to get a good riot yeah bubbling right helps if it's really hot like

summer of sam yeah sure oh like people are kind of already crazy on edge yeah yeah uh john leguizamo if he's there it makes it all the more tense yeah i also saw that movie with my mom i mean i see a lot of inappropriate sex scene movies. Oh, you were saying during the break that you were watching True Blood,

all the sex scenes with your mom. With my mom. Oh, really? Have you, did we ever talk about this, Dave? Have you ever watched a movie where maybe you didn't know

there was a sex scene upcoming with your parents and then all of a sudden you're like, whoa! I think when I was a kid I went to go see, we may have talked about this because was see no evil hear no evil

with Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder and one of them is blind and one of them is deaf and he's blind and there's a shower scene and I just remember my dad covering my eyes but like kind of jokingly.

Like, oh, with the two fingers mostly open. And also maybe there was a sex scene in the movie The Tall Guy with Jeff Goldblum. We talked about that last time I was here because I love Jeff Goldblum. There's a lot of, you bring out sex scenes in me. How awkward. There's a Hallmark card for that. Graham, you? Parents having sex.

Yeah, no. Yeah, no, there has been many occasions of that. But now I'm struggling to remember an exact movie. But I know that it's happened. And my mom will always say something like, oh, well, this is inappropriate. She's always the first to kind of break the barrier on it. Yeah, she's the inappropriate barrier. Well, this is not.

She's the Jackie Robinson of inappropriate. She just wants you to know that she knows what's happening. This is intercourse. This is what that is. That's what makes my mom so on the ball. She knows when to call it. She knows when to fold them. She can identify intercourse on sex.

There's a lot in my family of, like my aunt or my mom will rent a movie to watch with my grandma. And they will discover that there's a sex scene in it. Oh, that was too much for grandma. This is a weird thing that I was chatting with my brother about, about renting movies specifically for grandparents. Yeah, it's tough. Well, it is tough. And my grandfather had a method that I admire

and I think I'll probably employ later in my life when I don't care what people think about me. But if we rented a movie and he didn't like it, he would just get up like he was going to go to the bathroom and then he would just never come back. And we would look out the window and he'd be washing his car. So he would just

abandon ship. Although the movie that he couldn't get enough of, like this is like a guy like watch mostly war movies and historical things. But the one like modern day movie as it was while he was still alive was kindergarten cop. Couldn't get enough. I love that movie. He thought it was hysterical.

Are you okay? A lot of old people are just relieved to find out it's not a tumor. Yeah, it's true. It's not. How many, like, what do you call a doctor that mostly deals in senior citizens? Geriatrics.

Or palliative care. But how many times do you think that they heard it's not a tumor during the popularity? Because I think it was really popular with the senior set. But how many times do you think that they heard It's Not a Tuber during the popularity? Because I think it was really popular with the senior set. Sure. It was actually really scary. The opening scene in the mall where they left.

We're talking about a group of people who survived the Depression. What do you think is a movie that's out now that a senior would really get, could really get into? Up? Dodgeball. Up, sure, yeah. Dodgeball? Up? Dodgeball. Up, sure, yeah. Dodgeball? My parents hated Up.

Really? Yeah. Why? I don't know. I guess because it was a cartoon. And they hate love? Yeah. It's very manipulative what it does with your emotions.

Oh, it's huge. Yeah, you're crying, you're laughing. It's great. My mom's hard to tell. She'll watch. She likes her movies. And one time when I was...

She was visiting me and I had to go to work. So I was at the movie store and I came home and she's like, Oh, I just watched a movie. I just went through your movies and I picked one. It was pretty intense. It was the Requiem for Dreams. Oh, God. Speaking of inappropriate movies. I was like, Oh, you watched the whole thing, eh? It was the Requiem for Three. Speaking of inappropriate movies.

I was like, oh, you watched the whole thing, hey? She's like, yeah, it was pretty sad. I want to talk to you about drugs. Are you turning tricks for drugs? Dave, do you have an overheard? I do, but I was just wondering. Oh, sorry. I used to buy DVDs all the time. I haven't bought a DVD in years.

What was the last DVD you bought? For me, it was probably Borat. And then I realized, okay, I watched the extra features. Sure. And I never watched it again. No, that's true. I get a hundred and some odd channels. I don't really need to

watch a DVD whenever I want. What was the last DVD I bought? I think the last DVD I bought was an indie movie that I didn't think I would ever get a chance to see again. It wasn't super indie.

Or Diane Wiest's boobs in it. It was mostly about her boobs. It was parenthood. It was a movie called Brick. Oh, okay. You'll see that again. Yeah, because I own it. I didn't like it so much.

It's a modern classic. No, you didn't like it? It was too stylized for me. It just wasn't my cup of tea. Oh, yeah. I got it. Yeah, you got it. You understand.

But yeah. It's kind of macho actually yeah no well they like exactly i would recommend that for a guy totally no it's it's yeah i don't think it i i don't think it would be very popular with the lady set actually now that i think of it not not that it wouldn't be unless they're trying to play their working boyfriend. Working at Video Matica, do you get to do Lauren's pics? Yes. Oh. What's a recent one? There was one comedy,

independent comedy from L.A. that I really liked. They make movies in L.A. now? Yeah, I know. Well, it's sunny in that way. It was called

I'm Through with White Girls. Oh, really? It was about a brother who decides that he is done dating white girls. And then he meets this half white woman from Canada and she just blows his mind.

He's just like, she's like driving him crazy. He didn't say anything about half white girls. Just he's done with white girls. Yeah, I'm half done with this girl. Okay, I love it. Dave, do you have an over? Well, mine's kind of an overseen And it's just sort of a ridiculous commercial

And it is On Saturday mornings On the What channel is it? KVOS TV 12 Now channel 30 for some reason Oh, yeah That slogan's gonna hurt them now

Yeah, they show a There's an ad that they have for a, some kind of church, but it's like a cool church. Oh, yeah. The rock and roll. Yeah, yeah. And they'll have clips, like you don't hear the preacher talking, but he's like, he's wearing jeans. Sure.

Longer hair. No, no. Bald. Oh, he's the bald guy. That's right. Like tough guy. Yeah, no. Bald. Oh, he's the bald guy. That's right. Like tough guy. Yeah, yeah. Skinhead.

And there's like vintage cars and hot rods on the stage with him. And then they cut to like a rock band playing. And it's a huge like stadium of a church a church and i think it's called center point ministry yeah yeah yeah and their slogan i think you're right i think it's center point and uh uh my overseen is their slogan which is taking the religion out of church oh yeah what's that leave you with well vintage cars yeah and bingo. Blasphemy. Sure, yeah. And molestation.

There's a lot that goes on at church. Cub Scout meetings. Do you think that anybody is tricked into church by a rock and roll church? Yeah. My church is like a cool church. Yeah. I just more go for the rock and roll. Yeah.

You guys should come. Yeah. There's a little bit of church, but you don't mind it. You wear blue jeans. No one's here to judge you. One guy. God. Did you guys see there was a photo of a statue that they called the Touchdown Jesus?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he's got his hands up in the air like a football touchdown. Like a touchdown. But is it Jesus? Yeah, it's Jesus. Jesus. And it's in front of this church. I don't know where, but it was struck by lightning a couple days ago.

And it burnt. And it lit on fire, and it burnt to nothing. And there's just a crazy giant metal frame now in front of the church where the Touchdown Jesus used to be. And it's, if, if any place gets struck by lightning, you would think the last place,

like there's only significance to a church being hit by lightning or a meteorological station or something like that. Possibly Greece. Mount Olympus. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Totally.

Well, churches nowadays are getting taller and taller. And actually, a lot of cell phone companies... It's not a fact. It's a fact. Because a lot of cell phone companies will give them money to hide cell phone towers in the steeple. The Church of My Youth has one of those. Yeah.

And so when you see these brand new churches, that's where the money is coming from. Church of My Youth Ministries. Check it out. Every Sunday. Taking the youth out of christ uh i do it at a rollercade sure um at uh calloway my uh my overheard is not an over it's an overseen and uh this was this was uh i've been taking the train a lot in the last few days during kind of rush hour times. And it's the Canada Line train. It goes right downtown. But one of the stops, you kind of come up and it connects to a mall. It connects to like a mall that's got like the bay and all sorts of stuff in it.

So there's – if you go – if you walk up the steep escalator, you go to the left. There's a mall. If you go to the right, that's – You go up to the street. Yeah. And there's a London Drugstore. And if you go straight, you go up to the street. And so I was walking and there was just so much hustle and bustle.

My new thing is if I buy a ticket on one end, I give it away to somebody on the other end. That's illegal. I know, but I love it. Because people are super happy. You're catching them off guard. They're always super appreciative. They're always surprised by it. And it happened because somebody gave me a ticket, and I was like, I'm going to give this ticket to somebody else.

And then I just started doing that every day. And so I was walking around looking for somebody who looked like they were going for their wallet or their purse to pay for a ticket and i was kind of scanning people's faces in the crowd as i was walking up the platform and then i caught this one guy's face that looked so crazy and shifty had one eyebrow way in the air and he looked like Pinocchio. Like the rock. No, he looked like he was pulling off something. And he looked at me, and we really did lock gazes,

and he looked at me like there was this moment of understanding, like we are both trying to pull something off. And then I looked just down from his face, and he was wearing a red jumpsuit from Turkey wearing like a red jumpsuit from Turkey like a soccer jump well like a zipper jacket sure and he had this huge gut

that was all boxes that he had just shoplifted from the mall and then when I look back up at his face and he winked at me like got it which is a crazy thing I feel like I made some kind of deep criminal connection with this guy with just my eyes you're both doing random acts of kindness he was stealing medicines for an orphanage

but it was crazy because he had this huge gut but it was all squares like it was crazy because he had this huge gut, but it was all squares. Like it was all tiny squares of watches. He swallowed up too much Lego. Anyways, it was just a great... Too much Lego. As if there's an appropriate amount of Lego to swallow. Zero is the appropriate amount.

Well, one or two pieces is probably okay. No, yeah. You'll find that in your stool. Yeah. One or two pieces is probably okay. No, yeah. You'll find that in your stool. Yeah.

So, also, we've been blessed by having some people send in their overheards by email. You can say we're blessed, but I've already taken the religion out of church. Yeah, that's true. Where is it going to be this week? In a back alley. Yeah, at a UFC event. And, yeah, if you want to write to us you can write to us at stoppodcastyourself

at gmail.com somebody wrote to us today and said I heard that you're limiting the overheards that sucks well fair enough

yeah feel let it out don't bury it deep or it turns into a murder if you're upset write a letter write a letter to your

congressman or member of parliament sometimes you can just write a letter and then put letter to your congressman or member of parliament. Sometimes you can just write a letter and then put it in your diary and never send it. Never send it. It's just getting it out

on paper makes you feel good inside. Yeah, no doubt. No doubt. You know, I wrote a letter to No Doubt. No Doubt is my favorite band in the whole world.

I know. I feel like you're making fun of me. No, I'm not. Because you know I'm a huge No Doubt fan. No, have we ever talked about this? Oh, we really got to. Dude, when I was in the seventh grade, I used to wear like half shirts all the time.

Me too. And I put pink Kool-Aid in my hair. Did you have a little bindi? Yeah. I was like a little Gwena Bean. I saw them last summer. Yeah, you came in with the breeze. I think it was a Sunday morning.

I got braces when Gwen got braces. Really? No, I don't like No Doubt. I think it was a Sunday morning. I got braces when Gwen got braces. Really? No, I don't like No Doubt. I hate you, Dave Shumka. Why would you think I wasn't playing along? I do really like that video for Sunday morning. It always makes me want to have spaghetti. It looks delicious.

Good baseline. He says he doesn't like No Doubt, doubt but his i bet you download them on your affection there's no doubt about that yeah i don't really play them on your our first email overheard comes from laura p uh laura p i work in a warehouse and i was walking past a couple of mid-level supervisors the other day when I heard one of the men saying to the other, there's no I in team, but there is a you in fuck you. And that's actually,

there's two yous in fuck you, which is great. The second one comes from Phil A. Phil A was, this is overheard at a sandwich shop. Is that Chewbacca bread? I think he wanted to say Chewbacca. Yeah, I think so. Chewbacca bread.

You guys have that Chewbacca bread? Yeah. Do they got that at? It's like free. Yeah, they have it at Jack in the Box Chewbacca bread The Chewbacca sandwich Alright this third and final one of this week

Can't wait Comes from Evan K Evan K I work at a junior high school That is 7th and 8th grade in the states In the Chicago suburbs And hear a lot of baffling stuff Cicero Yeah that's right

Pretty much every day. The other day was a standout amongst the rest, though. I was battling my way through a hall full of youths when I heard one 12-year-old girl say to another, You've never heard of Josh Groban? Short pause. You should shoot yourself.

Oh, no. Thank you very much, Evan, and all the other people who wrote in. If you want to write to us, you can send them to stoppodcastyourself at gmail.com. Josh Groban is a singer. He is a singer. And what's his big song? You Raise Me Up. You Raise Me Up.

Yeah, when I think Josh Groban, I think of the Josh Brolin who's in Jonah Hicks. So I get confused right away but married to diane lane yep sure who showed her boobs in vancouver yeah um delicious but uh you raise me up is a song that uh jonah hex on the jonah hex sound yeah that people oh yeah my roommate's really excited for jonah because it was a comic book. Don't say yes. No. It's a song that people will sing on the American Idol auditions and every time they try to do it, the judges are always like, it's a tough one. Really? Is it a hard song? How does it go? I'm pretty good at karaoke.

sing what i say he's warming up you raise me a god is an awesome god uh jonah hex opens this week uh we uh for him it's i don't know it's like a um it's a classical slash pop song he like josh groban isn't a pop singer, but he's not... Is he good looking? Is that the thing? I don't know. He's something old ladies like. Oh, yeah. Like a bootleg. But instead of doing croonery songs, he does

like... Like chamber music? Half opera sort of show tunes. Like Charlotte Church? Yeah, yeah, yeah. sort of like show tunes. I don't know what it's called. Like Charlotte Church? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like pop popra. Popra. That's a good word. Like Celine Dion really started that kind of

thing, right? She's a trailblazer. Yeah, there's no doubt about it. Like if there wasn't... Epic pop. Canada would have 95... That's an actual fact. We'd have 95% less trails were it not for the blazer that was Sharks, Lindy Island. We also have overheards that have been called in

by people using telephones and VoIP. Yeah. Your Skypes, your VoIPs. Sure. If you would like to call us, our phone number is 206-339-8328. Let's have a listen. Yeah.

Hey, Dave and Graham and possible guests. This is William from Chicago, and I just had it overheard here at work. I work at a box office at a live musical theater, and an elderly couple came up to buy tickets from me, and they won specific seats, and I was able to get them for them, and they won specific seats, and I was able to get them for them, and they were shocked. They were, seriously, seriously, you can get a fit-throw center? And I was like, yeah, whatever, no big deal.

And they were so thrilled, and I was entering their information, and she turns to her husband and goes, oh, Harold, such good news today. First the news from the doctor, and now this. Oh, my God. Congratulations. It's boring. That's the news they got. For the old couple.

They're having a baby. Oh, wow. Yeah, so that's like somebody who just has no sense of the matters of scale. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then she finds a nickel. I'm telling you, things are shaping up. She gets a parking spot with ten minutes left on the meter. Yeah, first, cancer remission.

Then some tickets. Then we got to see Joseph in the amazing Technicolor dream coat. We got to see Joseph in the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. You know, on like last weekend or the weekend before, Godspell was on TV, followed by Joseph in the Technicolor Dreamcoat. Was that what was following it? It was a day of musicals. I remember watching it. The Wiz preceded it.

Oh, I like the Wiz. But then I remember as a kid listening, like my parents would, that would be something we would listen to, would be the soundtracks of these things. Really not appropriate for kids is watching it now. Both Godspell and Technicolor Dreamcoat are pretty controversial. They're about the Bible, but like a hip young take on it. The ones I saw when I was a kid, we saw The King and I.

Okay, yeah. With Rudolf Nureyev. Oh, yeah. Nureyev. The famous... Ballerino. Yeah, very famous. And he...

My only memory of that is the ladies in front of us getting mad every time I unwrapped a candy and smacked it in my lips. Yeah. And then we saw Les Miserables. Oh, so great. Yeah.

Oh, I love it. It's, oh, oh, boy. But this. What a, what a hoot. There's this song in Jesus Christ Superstar. Yeah. And that's one of the one, the one where the guy's taunting Jesus. And like, I was like a six or seven year old kid.

Who, Pontius Pilate? Yeah. And he's, and he's going like, you, you, you know, you can't do this.

And then one of the, the lines is like, come on, you King of the Jews. And as I was like a kid, I would just be like walking around the house. Calling people that? You King of the Jews.

Like, I didn't know what that, I just, cause in the song, it sounds like it's a term that he's putting down. Sure. Jesus with. So I just thought it was like, you a term that he's putting down Jesus with. So I just thought it was like, you know, you toady, king of the Jews.

Because that's how it's sung in the song. The first song in Jesus Christ Superstar is, I don't know, it's a really good, it's a rocker. Oh, yeah, yeah, you're right. And I don't remember the title of it, but I know exactly the song. Heaven on Their Minds. That's the name of it. It's sung by Judas, and it's a real good one. And there's a video of David Cross, the comedian, singing it, and he's being backed up by Canadian rock band Sloan.

Really great. No way, really. Oh, man. You know what? There's a lot of good stuff on the internet. Yeah, you guys should check it out. Like this next call. Yeah. It's all over of good stuff on the internet. Yeah, you guys should check it out. Like this next call. Yeah.

It's all over. It's blowing up YouTube. Hey, Dave and Graham. This is Brian from Philadelphia calling in an overheard. Two weeks ago, my grandmother died in Florida. So my wife and I traveled down there. And while we were there, my mother just really wanted to see Sex and the City 2. So we decided

to go and we're sitting in the theater. Film is starting. As I'm sure you know, the opening of the film has sweeping shots of Manhattan. Alicia Keys' Empire State of Mind is playing

over this montage of footage. And behind us, a gentleman whispers to the lady with him, That's Manhattan. That's Manhattan? Yeah. That's the city from the title. That's, it's funny.

That's another movie that's two and a half hours long. Yeah. Really? They need to put a cap on this shit. Yeah. What do you think? What do you think is the maximum time for a movie? I think for a comedy, you want to do like 90 minutes.

Yeah. A good 90 minutes. If it's an epic, go two hours. But you've got to really like... But. Yeah. 90 minutes. If it's an epic go two hours. But you've got to really like they shouldn't have made either movie in my opinion.

But that's the weird thing because he said you know first of all condolences. Yeah. That's really sad. Yeah.

But I'm glad your mother found a way to cope. Well that's the interesting because he was like all she wanted to do was watch that movie. How can you say no to your mom? Especially around funeral situations

For that time of year Yeah that time of year My favorite time of year But you know that's a weird thing Because the last Not the last funeral I went to But the second to last funeral I went to I had a real hankering

For just seeing a movie Like something funny Checking out You kind of just want to, I had a real hankering for just seeing a movie, like something funny. Checking out. You kind of just want to check out for a couple hours. Yeah, but the only thing in the theater was Yumi and Dupree. And so I was like, I guess that's going to be the film. And now I can't, if it comes on TV, I have to watch the entire,

there's like some weird thing in my head where I'm like, I got to watch all of Yumi and Dupree. You're still in mourning. Yeah, that's right. While I still wear this black band. It's filthy. Don't wring your arm. Like a soccer player.

Yeah. And finally... Hey, Dave and Graham. This is Travis from Texas. I am calling with an overheard, but I wanted to also tell you guys that Rodney Carrington is the country singer who sings funny songs, but seriously. And my overheard is, I was at Walmart earlier today going through the self-checkout,

and I hear these two boys, probably one 12 and the other five, and the 12-year-old says, hey, look, Michael Jackson, pointing to a magazine, walks over and says, wait, Gary Coleman, and then walks over to his mom and says, mom, who's Gary Coleman? And she says, oh, he was a guy on TV. And he says, what show? And she says, oh, he was a guy on TV. And he says, what show? And she says, TMZ. Oh, that's terrible.

Gary Coleman, famous from TMZ. He's from that show, TMZ. Oh, man. That made me sad, because Gary Coleman never got a fair shake. Didn't he? No, not really. Not really. He did for a while.

I watched a movie of the week that was done about the... What was the show he was on? Different Strokes. Different Strokes. And it was a movie of the week, which they don't really make these movies of the week. Was it on E? Possibly. Yeah.

Did you see it? I don't know if I saw it, but I'm familiar with its existence. Yeah. They made a Mork & Mindy one, too. Yeah. So whatever company made the Mork & Mindy one also made this one. And I watched it, and apparently he wanted to be an actor as much as any kid wants to be an actor or an astronaut or uh sure a cowboy yeah um and and so he got into it and then um he had serious like kidney problems that's why he's

it was the size he was aware of and then uh like he got super sick on the show and uh like his parents forced him back to work even though he was like dying of this kidney thing and he was on dialysis and stuff they were the ones that was like you like you got to go back to work because they had spent you made a commitment well they spent all his money uh up to that point and they realized like to get any kind of fortune back they would he would have to go back to work and he was like what are you talking about yeah and his dad's name unfortunately was Millis and so it didn't sound right when he said it. But if you want to call us

with an overheard, we've got to get out of this gallows. It was all this death stuff. It's too much gallows humor. Oh, I'm sorry. 206-339. Pick the best ones.

Yeah, they were great. And please, call them in. Morbid or... Well, no. I don't want to invite a bunch of morbidity. Well, but if they happen to be morbid, I'm into it. I like morbid. I no I don't want to invite a bunch of morbidity but if they happen to be morbid

I'm into it I like morbid I was Wednesday Adams once for Halloween is that the the kid the braids from the Adams family

from the monsters 206-339-8328 people have been asking for us to do some of our older segments. Yeah, segments. And it's not like we've fallen out of love with segments. You guys just fell in love with talking about yourself.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's true. Well, that's about right, Lauren Martin. All a spade a spade. But we haven't done something for a while, and somebody specifically requested that we do it. And it's a little segment we like to call Stuntcasting. Are you an actor?

Are you looking for work? Stuntcasting. Stuntcasting. Stunt. Stuntcasting. Powder. Danny DeVito, Taxi Cab, the movie, Danny Glover, Martin Short, anyone in the movie, pure luck. Stunt casting.

Stunt casting. Thank you, Connor Holler, former guest for the theme song. Oh, such a great theme. Stunt casting. Thank you, Connor Holler, former guest for the theme song. Oh, such a great theme. Now, what this is, is so many movies are just remakes of old entities. You're 18. Yeah, you're Karate's kid.

Jonah Hex. You're Jonah Hex's. I remember the original cast of Jonah Hex with James Brolin. Yeah, exactly. Instead of your Josh Groban's. Now, yeah, this summer seems to be not, it's not overly done, but it does seem to have enough of the remake genre. Is Transformers 3 coming out this year? No, next year.

No, but you've got Wall Street, the sequel. Oh, yeah. Money Never Sleeps. Yeah. You've got your A-Team. You've got your A-Team. You've got your Karate Kid. You've got enough kind of in the remake arena that it does make me feel like

we should do a stunt cast. Last time you were here we did a stunt casting for Full House. Yes. And I believe we cast as the Bob Saget role. We cast the guy who played Ed on the TV show Ed. That's right.

Oh, yeah, right. Maybe Lorenzo Lamas was John Stamos. I'm trying to remember who Dave Coulier was. I think it was a cartoon. It was a cartoon, Wayne Gretzky. Wayne Gretzky. That's right. We had a lot of fun.

So this stunt casting idea, because somebody wrote in, I believe it was Ellington, who's a longtime listener, wrote an email saying, yeah, he missed the stunt casting segment. So then I was kind of, it was in my head. And then I saw a report on the internet that they are doing a full reboot of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise. Oh. Yeah. They're doing a full, they're starting from zero again. CGI one. Oh. Yeah. They're doing a full, they're starting from zero again. Did it CGI one years ago?

Yeah. A few years ago. No, they're going to do a whole new, it's going to be a whole new game. Are you sure this is the, we should have talked this out because I don't know very many famous turtles. No, neither do I,

but I'm looking for who are the, who are the characters, like the characters, who can we match to be... I know Donatello does machines. Like I'm talking about... Michelangelo loves to party. Yeah, that's right. He's a party dude. Yeah, Raphael is cool, but rude.

Raphael's a little brooding. Wait, who's the brooding one? Leonardo. Oh, yes. But see, here's the thing. In your era... Who does Donatello do machines? Yeah, Donatello, well, he did yes. But see, here's the thing. In your era of... Did Donatello do machines? Yeah, Donatello, well, he did machines. But in the era of an Avatar, you have to have an...

You don't just create these things out of nowhere. Yeah, that Zoe chick from Avatar. She's in center stage. Sure, she was also in Star Trek. Sure, yeah. I love Star Trek. Yeah. That was a good remake. We've already done it. We already tackled Star Trek. We know we did The Next Generation, I love Star Trek yeah that was a good remake

we've already done it we've already tackled Star Trek we know we did The Next Generation oh that's right but I think we all have

we have enough knowledge between the three of us of the Ninja Turtles who are we gonna suit up in the whatever you call that the capture outfit

to do the turtles your splinter who's gonna play a live action or perhaps a capture shredder? April O'Neil, my favorite. And April O'Neil. Okay, okay.

We need four turtles. Splinter the rat. We need shredder. We need April O'Neil. Do we need a Krang? Do we need a Bebop and Rocksteady? Yes, we do. Yeah, absolutely. And a Krang? Do we need a Bebop and Rocksteady? Yes, we do. Yeah, absolutely. And a Krang.

Krang is a brain in a box? He's a brain in a human suit. But in a human stomach? Yeah, he's in the stomach of a human suit. I don't like this one bit. Okay, so let's start with the least of the characters. Probably your Bebop and Rocksteady. I don't know anything about the characters your Bebop and Rocksteady. I don't know anything about the characters of Bebop and Rocksteady.

Okay, think about it. I don't remember those guys. They were foot soldiers. No, they weren't. One was a warthog and one was a rhinoceros. Okay. We could cut them out. We could just do the turtle casting.

Sure, because I don't know anything about those characters. Okay, so we'll drop them. I know that they're just grunts. So why not, you know, Jason Statham? Gerald. Gerard Butler. Yeah, sure. Gerard Butler and Jason Statham.

Done. Done. Easy casting. Sure. I'll just read the line. Yeah. So we got them finished. Oh, you lot.

Yeah. I am one of the two of them. Yeah. I'm either into a kind of music called bebop okay let's start with we'll start with michelangelo fun loving he's the party guy always always wisecracking sure right like a polyshore but younger yeah let's go let's think modern yeah yeah yeah we're trying to think. Who would be the equivalent? Pauly Short. Or Michelangelo.

Who's the guy who's in... Russell Brand! Oh, maybe. Oh, Russell Brand is a Michelangelo? He's a party guy. He is a party guy. Did they ever get him to the Greek? I think it's all an act.

I bet Russell Brand is like... It used to be a real thing. He used to be a this movie. I bet Russell Brand is like shit in bed. It used to be a real thing. Like he used to be a sex addict. Well, I don't know if he's shit in bed. I mean. You don't know? No, well, the only time I had sex with him was not in a bed. You blacked out.

So that's hard to say. Okay, so do we like Russell Brand as the party character, or is there somebody else that we feel like embodies the party? Kim Mitchell. Oh, sure. Yeah. You're the wild part the party? Kim Mitchell. Oh, sure, yeah. A senior Kim Mitchell. Maybe a more wizened

Michelangelo. Is there anybody who's been What about a Ryan Reynolds? Oh, an Andrew W.K.? I like that. That's all he does is party. Andrew W.K. as Michelangelo. Got it.

Got it. I agree. Okay, so now we move on. Donatello. Does machines. He does machines. He's a scientist. Does machines.

He's the guy who's always tinkering. What about one of the Mythbusters guys? Which one? Which one? The one with the glasses. The beret? Yeah, the beret and mustache. Yeah, the beret. The big walrus mustache. The big guy? Yeah, the beret and mustache. Yeah, the beret.

The big walrus mustache. The big guy. Yeah, okay. The bear. Jamie, I think is his name? Yeah, okay. So we got Jamie from Mythbusters as Donatello. We got Andrew WK as Michelangelo.

Sure. Okay, so Raphael, he was always the sarcastic, wisecracker, right? Sure. I don't know. I never really differentiated them. I just know Raphael was the one. Yeah, he was the one. He was red.

He had the two weapons. Scythe. Yeah, Scythe. He was the only one I had the action figure of. Raphael. Well, he was cool, but rude. Okay. Cool, but rude.

Yeah, he was. Michelangelo was more. He was my favorite turtle. And he was more the lovable goof. Yeah, that's right. Whereas Raphael was more like... He's more like the one that would not call you back.

Yeah, but he was a wisecracker, right? Yeah, but he's kind of a dink. He thinks he's cool. He was a little disattached. Yeah. Right? Disenfranchised, maybe? Ethan Hawke!

I just watched the reality fight. Like a younger version of Ethan Hawke. If we can find, who kind of embodies that same, like Robert Pattinson, but maybe not. I don't like that guy. Maybe not that, he's a little fae. Like a Michael Cera. But Michael Cera, he's a little bit too. Wimpy.

Yeah, we need somebody who it looks like they might be. And Ethan Hawke's a good pick, but he's in all. I'm not Wimpy. Yeah, we need somebody who it looks like they might be... And Ethan Hawke's a good pick, but he's an old... You're not thinking of him. Yeah, yeah. Josh Hartnett? What about the guy from Jonah Hex?

Is it James Brolin? I don't know. He's not young. No, you're right. We need a young guy. How old is Andrew W.K.? It's fine, it's fine. He's a party dude.

Oh, well, what about... Parties never die. What about the guy from that movie we were talking about with Brick, where it was all... Joseph Gordon-Levitt? Yeah. He's fine. He's a party dude. Oh, well, what about the guy from that movie we were talking about with Brick, where it was all Joseph Gordon-Levitt? Yeah. He's good. He could be a wisecracker.

Is he? In what? Angels in the Outfield? He could play the brooding. Maybe he could be a Leonardo. Maybe I'm jumping ahead. Maybe he's a Leonardo. Yeah, maybe he's more of a Leonardo.

Although I feel like there's a lot of brooding to choose from. That's true. There's a lot of good brooding out there. But we do. We need somebody who's funny. There's a lot of good brooding out there. We do. We need somebody who's funny. He was wisecracking in Third Rock. A Jack Black? Or is that too leaning towards the Michelangelo arena?

You know what? And let's learn from the Avengers movie. In an ensemble, you don't want to have too many stars. You want to have people that can work together. Because Jack Black is going to outshine Andrew WK who's not really well versed in film. It's going to be his first major film role. Everyone probably will outshine the non-actors.

We just need somebody who's like who's good at delivering kind of quick one-liners. Pauly Short. Like David Spade would have been perfect In his prime He's a grown up now

Who else is on Saturday Night Live these days? I don't remember There's nobody who's like a young smartass We're looking for a smartass Who's the smartass? That's who we need Aziz Ansari He's my new favorite stand-up comedian I'll be here in a couple weeks

I know, I know He should be my soulmate He's great, he's super smart Ansari He should be my soulmate Yeah sure He's great He's super smart ass Alright He's off of the soulmate stuff Aziz

Phone me Yeah he's not listening He said He says he listens He reads the internet He said that nowhere Okay so So far

Now we gotta get For Leonardo Now he's the brooding guy He's the leader Okay We got a lot of brooders Yeah so I said Jordan Gordon Joseph Leavitt Okay, so, so far, now we've got to get for Leonardo. Now, he's the brooding guy. He's the leader. Okay, we've got a lot of brooders. Yeah, so I said Jordan, Gordon Joseph Leavitt. Joseph Gordon Leavitt.

I say Avril Lavigne. Sure. Okay, well, controversial. Who's brooding? Robert Pattinson is certainly brooding. He's brooding. Also, that Taylor Lautner. Also, equally in the brooding department. It's a brood fest.

Yeah, so much brooding. Goodness gracious. What about the guy from Dear John? Yeah, Channing Tatum? Yeah, Channing Tatum. No, he's useless. Yeah, from Fighting to Fight. What about the guy from the Bomb movie? Bomb?

He's part of the Bomb Squad. One best picture. Oh, thank you. Hurtlocker. Jeremy something? Yeah, that squad. One best picture. Oh. Thank you. Hurt Locker. Hurt Locker. Jeremy something? Yeah, that guy. Jeremy Irons.

Yeah, Jeremy's iron. Gerard Depardieu. Was it Rye's Meyer or something? I don't know. And that's why he's never going to be A-list. Hard to pronounce A-list. That guy? No?

No good? Not brilliant enough? Yeah, he's a little old. Okay, so we need somebody like a young... I still like Gordon Joseph Leavitt. You're really going to have to learn to pronounce. Is it Joseph? Is it Leavitt?

Joseph Leavitt. Get it. It's Leavitt Leavitt. What about Miley Cyrus? Because she's in the midst of her screw you Disney, I'm going to be a badass now. So she's just looking to do nude scenes.

Like some sort of nude ninja scene. I find the best brooding guy in television is Justin Bobby. The guy who plays Justin Bobby on The Hills. Who is this? I'm afraid I Justin Bobby on The Hills. Oh, who is this? I'm afraid I don't watch The Hills.

I'm sorry. My answer is pass. I'll accept you, Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Or Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Who's the guy in I've Been Watching Party Down? Have you seen that?

No. I've heard of it,? Have you seen that? No. I've heard of it, and I know of it. Yeah, caterers. Is there somebody on that that you think would be a good Leonardo? Yeah, he's got the big head. You're going to have to... We need a name. We're casting here.

Can't just be Big Head Guy. Big Headed Guy. Okay, so if nobody else has a better... Jogo Lev. Jogo Lev. Okay, so we've got our turtles a better... Jogo Lev. Jogo Lev. Okay, so we've got our turtles. Who's Jogo Lev? Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

Oh, okay. He's a good Leonardo. I think he's a good Leonardo. I'm on board. Okay, so now we need a wizened, older... Asian? Possibly Asian. Or philosophical.

Or rat. To play our human... Yeah, or some sort of rat face. Ooh, who's rat face? Oh, Steve Buscemi. Sure? Yeah, yeah. Okay.

So Steve Buscemi as our splinter. Yeah. So now we need a young reporter. Yeah. And Shredder. And Shredder, yeah.

So April... Shredder, Krang, and... And April. April, okay. Okay, so April... April was... She's sassy. She and... And April. April. Okay. Okay. So, April. April was... She's sassy. She wasn't afraid to get dirty.

She'd get down in the sewer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she's a young reporter. Go get him, reporter. She's got kind of a... Lady Gaga. Kind of a... Nope.

Nope. Way off. Nope. Exactly. She wears jumpsuits. All right. Who... What's her haircut like?

It was like a... Like kind of a... Just above the shoulders? No. It was like kind of just above the shoulders no it was like more of a bob it was a bit longer than a bob but still long enough to be feminine yeah yeah what about like a Hillary Swank no she's had enough movies

yeah well so what she's not that good okay alright after Amelia Earhart bomb no okay she'll ruin it you've got a lot

you're very opinionated yeah what do you got what do you got over Hilary Swank because I like Hilary Swank do you like her I tweaked to it

but if you if you've got somebody better Parker Posey I'll take it yeah Parker Posey sure Parker Posey pox okay so Parker Posey okay so now we'vey pox. Okay, so Parker Posey.

Okay, so now we've got two left. Let's go with Shredder. How would you describe Shredder? Well, okay. Shredder wears a helmet, covers his face. Yeah, so you don't need somebody. You don't need a looker. Oh, who's that guy?

Ron Perlman. Yeah. Who plays like Hellboy and stuff. And he's always, you never see his face. And he managed the Backstreet Boys. No, that was a different Ron. And he's always, you never see his face. And he managed the Backstreet Boys. No, that was a different one. And he also married Danny DeVito. Yeah.

Okay. I don't love it. Okay. Well, what about like a martial arts guy? Yeah. Is he good at martial arts? I know he's got spiky hands. Yeah, he's got spiky hands.

Anyone can be good with spikes. Oh, well, and if we need somebody who's good with spikes, Hugh Jackman. Greatest Wolverine. I thought you were going to say the guy who played Shane on Degrassi. He fell off a bridge. Yeah, well, he was good with spikes before that. Yeah, he was really good with spikes. What about...

I like Jackman. I like Jackman. I'm just thinking, is there somebody who's great with the martial arts? Or, yeah, ooh, ooh. Who's good with evil? Like a John Turturro, he's good with evil. He can be a great evil guy. Or like a Tim Roth.

He's good at evil. Yeah, Tim Roth is good at evil, but he's probably bad at ninja skills. Sure. Probably a little shaky in that department. What about who is the guy that's in Lord of the Rings and he's also in The Matrix and has had experience with wire work? I like it.

I like it. And he was V for Vendetta. He wore a mask. Yeah, he played Todd Vendetta. Yeah, Todd Vendetta. The title role. Leaving Krang, so we need somebody. He wore a mask. Yeah, he played Todd Vendetta. Yeah, Todd Vendetta. For the title role. Leaving Krang, so we need somebody who looks like a brain.

Brain in a muscle body with, um, does it have suspenders on? I don't think so. No, he had shorts. He had red shorts. The robot thing. But not yellow suspenders? No, he had yellow boots.

So a badly dressed brain. What about the older chick from the original Beverly Hills 90210? Oh, you're thinking more of the robot structure. I'm thinking more of Krang himself. Gabrielle Carter. Yeah, she was a smart one. I want someone who looks like a brain. Yeah, I'm thinking...

Oh, visually. Who's got scars all over? Omar from The Wire. The Seal. Now, I'm not leaning towards scars, but always somebody that I think looks very brainy like Roger Ebert.

He does these days. And he has a computerized voice now. Yeah, well Crank didn't. No, Crank just had Crank's voice was like like some kind of like a pudding voice. I think we should stop talking about Roger

Ebert or else he's never going to give this film two thumbs up. That's true. I brought it up. Alright, so who, anybody will pinkish you? Babe from Pig in the City. But not Babe from Babe 1. That babe was gross.

I bet they're really old now. More brain-like. I mean, I don't hate Babe, Pig in the City. Yeah, sure, Babe. Alright, so let's just run down, if I I mean, I don't hate Babe Pink in the city. Yeah, sure. Babe Pink. All right. So let's just run down. If I can remember it, it was Andrew W.K. as Michelangelo. Yep.

We had as Raphael. Aziz Ansari. Aziz Ansari. For Donatello. He does machines. We had the Mythbuster. Mythbuster. We had Jamie from Mythbusters. For Leonardo, Joseph, Gordon Levitt.

Sure, Joko Lev. And then we had... Splinter was... Did we ever do that? Yeah, we did. I'll listen back. Oh, Steve Buscemi. Steve Buscemi, that's right.

Shredder, we had the guy from Vendetta Todd Vendetta and then April O'Neil was Parker Posey and then finally Krang was from Bay Pig in the City some good Stencast

Green Light that's what I say two thumbs up now for you know to wrap up things uh if people want to find out more about lauren martin where do they go on the internet what can they learn oh boy i'm i need to get a website i'm sure i'm working on it i'm working on getting my life together website that you were talking about with all the films oh borrow, Borrow Time. Borrow Time. BorrowTime.com? Uh,.ca. Okay, BorrowTime.ca. Borrowed Time? Borrow

Time. The director of our films, his name's Borrowman. So it's the first part of his name, Borrow. And we're borrowing time. And you can see a whole bunch of short films on there. Right on. So BorrowTime.ca. Borrow Time. And, uh, yeah, keep an eye out for

what's called Do Something With Your Life. Do Something With Your Life. And you can sometimes find me down on Granville Island for Theater Sports. Sure. Thank you for Theater Sports League. Wednesday nights.

Why not? They do a 9 o'clock show. Improvised Theater. Improvised Theater. Absolutely. Lauren Martin, very a funny improviser, actress, comedian, doing it all. You can

sometimes see me riding my bike around town. Sure, why not? With your little black helmet. Because I play safe. Yeah. You know what? Can we give a part to that robot from the War Amps commercial? Astar? Yeah, Astar the robot? He's unavailable.

He's cost too much. He's booked. Yeah, exactly. Dave, do you have anything to plug? Well, first of all, thanks to everyone who donated to us. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Your t-shirts and thank you gifts are all getting printed up. You should have them within two to four weeks. Nice.

As of the announcement today. And my one other thing that's going on is my friend Simon, he's doing a thing for the Vancouver, I think it's called the Vancouver Public Spaces Network. Yeah, that's right.

If you're in Vancouver on the 26th of June at 1 o'clock, there is an outdoor event. If you like rhythm, if you like drumming, bring your drumsticks, bring your spoons, bring whatever will make noise. A bucket? Yeah. There's just, outside of the Commodore on Granville Street, there's just a big thing happening that day of just people walking around.

I think it's going to start at the Commodore and just move. How many dreads will there be? There will be too many. Too many? Yeah. But not enough for my ultimate plan. Yeah. There will be a lot of people looking for a place to crash. Sure, yeah. Where are you guys going after this?

I don't know what it will be exactly, but it's some kind of drumming festival. Bring your rhythm. Yeah. We're just trying to make Vancouver a more magical place. People don't like to dance very much. But there will be.

That's because it was outlawed here before that Kay Bacon came into town. Yeah. I don't remember his first name, just the initial. I remember that it was a meat that's popular. Oh, and... Kay Ham or Kay Bacon. No, that's it. And what about you, Graham?

No, I don't have anything particularly to plug. However, you know, as I always say, tell your friends. And you, like we said earlier in the podcast, if you want to contact us, stoppodcastingyourself at gmail.com. Or if you want to call us, 206-339-8328. And check out the blogs at MaximumFun.org. And if you want to say something, want to get engaged in a conversation, they've got a great forum page over there. But yeah, anytime you want to say hello, send a message.

We'd respond to all the emails that we get. And yeah, hope you enjoyed it. Come on back next week for what I can only guess will be an extremely experimental episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Thank you.