Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 145 - Abby Campbell

Episode Date: December 21, 2010

The wonderful Abby Campbell returns for our Christmas episode to talk  getting engaged, Dave's dreams, and Swiss cheese dishes.  Then Emmett  Hall and Chris Gauthier stop by to perform a Christmas pageant.

The Mercury is Cold and Gray It's like the color of your mother's veins And I know there's not much to say It could happen any day Snow Snow Hello everybody and welcome to a very special Christmas edition, or post-Hanukkah edition, or crazy Kwanzaa edition, or tat edition of Stop Podcasting Yourself.

My name is Graham Clark, and with me as always is the ever festive and ever jolly Mr. Dave Shumka. Better luck next time, Ramadan. Oh, I forgot Ramadan! I think even Hanukkah, that's just sort of like kind of a half-assed thing. Like, oh, we gotta include them. Do they have like Hanukkah cats?

Like they have the jingle cats? Yeah, they do. They do Havan Agila, they do Dreidel Dreidel, they do zero other songs. No, but I think it's like, it's not even a big Jewish holiday. It just happens to be when we

have our awesome one. Yeah, that's right. So, by proxy, it's their best. It sums them up. And we had a different theme song. Oh, yes, we did. As with our Christmas episodes, go back and listen uh you'll

notice that we we like to mix it up with some seasonal flavor uh and that song was a song called snow by the zolas and that is uh featured on a uh this canadian independent music compilation called uh i'm gonna get the name wrong i think it's ho Ho Ho Ho... There's like, you need to put a little accent on it. Sure. Ho Ho Ho Canada. Oh, okay. There we go. Duh.

As in part duh. Oh, okay. Number two. So, yeah, I'll put a link for that. It's a free... You can download the whole compilation for free. So, I'll put a link on our... That's our gift to you.

Yeah. Merry Christmas. And our guest today today a uh repeat guest always a bumper favorite uh five five time the first ever yeah uh a lovely lady was at one point dave shunka's girlfriend now dave shunka's fiancee and still her own person miss abby campbell that's me i don't think you are your own person. I think that's sort of... What's that voice? It's my grandpa voice.

Hi, guys. The dog. I think in a wedding situation, you're no longer your own person. Yeah, because you share and share a life. Yeah. Mikasa e Sukas. Yeah, that's right. share a life. Yeah. Me casa, a su casa.

Yeah, that's right. So goodbye to Abby's personhood. Yeah, all you women who are independent. Throw your hands up at me. At somebody else, not at you two. Not at me. I'm not a person. All right, let's get to know us.

Get to know us. So Abby Campbell. That's me. Last time you were now that's right oh yeah miss abby campbell are you gonna take my name i don't know i'm kind of attached to campbell but i think abby shumka sounds oh sounds exotic sounds worse mrs abby campbell's pretty great shumka why don't you take his name, you take hers? That was a witcheroo. Sure. Dave Campbell.

Double the paperwork. Yeah. It's fine. You've got to sign things anyways. That's what I have written all over my notebook. Mr. Dave Campbell, is it? That's my uncle. If you guys double the paperwork, you get two cakes.

Two cakes? Is that true? Do the cakes come with the paperwork? The license. cakes. Two cakes? Is that true? Do the cakes come with the paperwork? The license. Not a lot of people know that. The cake, cutting the cake symbolizes we have completed the paperwork. And that's why you smush it in the face. And when you cut the cake,

if the knife comes out clean, is that good luck? Or does that mean you have any girlfriends? It means you're going to divorce in a year. And if you use those cutting scissors that you see on tv for food cutting yeah you're lazy it means that you got the best gift ever for your wedding yeah what is this you're snuggie uh i think it's those scissors to me it's those scissors they have new chia pet shapes go on they have spongebob i believe believe. Mm-hmm. Good. Oh, there was more, and now I can't remember what they were.

Oh. I just heard, like, if the TV was on and I was waking up or something. Oh, no, it was late at night. I was kind of falling asleep, and I just heard, and the new shapes for Chia Pet. Wow, that was an event where you should have written down. Yeah, you should have. Put my glasses back on.

Woken me up. Get up. Dave, wake up. Chia Pets. So, the last time you were on, you weren't, well, now you're in school, right? Yes. Tell us about school. School's great.

I just started a fashion design program at the beginning of October. Make it work. Every day. Every day. And I also don't bore Nina either. I try not to bore Nina. But yeah, it's great. Make it work.

That is. Tim Gunn. Tim Gunn. Tim tim gunn gather round uh did you guys know that he's gay he did the the it gets better campaign oh is that right yeah he's a gay man i didn't know that okay okay i guess it's always the people you least expect yeah yeah he's kind of one of those undercover guys oh well we went fishing all those times he didn't do anything gay no but every time that you tried to bait a hook he went my work and that way he does um so fashion school is fun yeah it's super fun i mean i've never gotten i have next week's my last week, and I've never gotten grades. Your last week of the first term. Of my first term, yeah.

And I've never gotten grades like this. Oh, really? Never in my life. Through the roof? Oh, like 97s and like 10 out of 10 for like everything. And so it's very incredible. Mind you, this is like the introduction classes to everything. Right.

And like I'm in classes with 18-year-olds. Fun. So yeah. You're hot. Yeah. To say the least. classes to everything right it's and like i'm all i'm in classes with 18 year olds fun so yeah interesting yeah to say the least they all work at milestones uh some of them probably is that a local reference to local maybe i don't know is that something 18 year olds do i don't know what 18 year olds do they bust tables listen to kesha well there was one girl in my class who was talking about how much she loved the spice girls Girls and how she had Spice Girls shoes and Spice Girls notebooks and Spice Girls hair clips and Spice Girls. She named off a million different things. And I'm like, I was like 18 when the Spice Girls were around.

You were eight. Wow. Oh, my God. You weren't that old when the Spice Girls were around. You were like 16. 16. Yeah. But by the time they came to North America

I collected all the same stuff. and they had all the merchandise. Oh, you're thinking of when we were living in a Spice World. Yes. And you just today, you found out that you got a... Unpaid internship.

Well done. Unpaid internship. Why you slap the wall? I was expressing my enthusiasm. Unpaid internships. That's the whole plot of the last half of... What was that show with Heidi Montag and whatnot on the... Where they were living?

Oh, The Hills. Yes, they did internships. Right? Bunch of internships. Was that the last half of it? Who did the unpaid... Oh, I guess Lauren. L.C. Conrad.

I don't know if they got paid to work at Vogue or People's Revolution. They got paid to be on TV. Wow. They got paid handsomely. They had unpaid internships. They get $30,000 an episode. Pretty good. Pretty good.

So you... So it's great. I'm sewing. I'm drawing. I'm learning about design. I'm learning about... I get to learn Photoshop. Nice.

Which is awesome. I can make some cool stuff now. You can put Grandpa's head on anybody's body. Anybody. Tim Gunn's body, for example. Oh, my God. Would that work? You'd make it. I'd make some cool stuff now You can put Grandpa's head on anybody's body Tim Gunn's body for example Would that work? I'd make it work And of course

As we discussed Albeit briefly on the Moshe Kasher episode Of the podcast That you guys are now engaged Yes I have diamonds Yeah right I got bling. What's the difference between diamonds and bling?

Is there one? I don't think you need diamonds to be bling or have bling. Sometimes the bling is inside you all along. Is that what you find out? After your dance-off. But yes, I have the prettiest and probably most expensive thing i've ever owned so you've you've gotten grades you never had before i don't know expensive thing you never owned before this is really uh this is a banner year 2010 is so much better than 2009 2009 sucked

yeah stinker 2009 was a stinker i could i was so happy for that year to be over. It's a whole bunch of shitty stuff happened. Yeah, it was gross, though. This is my house, David. I can fucking swear. I'm not marrying a sailor. Well, you don't know that. Maybe this fashion school doesn't work out. We are being married by a ferry captain.

We should get married on a boat. Why not? Because we both love boats so much. You hate boats. I know that. Dave fucking hates boats. Dave hates boats. So how did Mr. Shumka propose?

Because I think I told the story. Did you? I gave her a ring and she was like, hey. Was that how it went? Girls tell the story better. Essentially, yes. But as a girl, I will use story better. Essentially, yes. You just tossed them across the room? Being a girl, I will use more words.

Yeah, go ahead. Use your words. I hid it in her cereal. Do I have to poo it out? Oh, come on. I hid it in the box as a free toy. Yeah. Grandpa ate it.

He had to poo it out. Guys, this is a beautiful, romantic, Christmassy episode. Yeah. And I'm trying to keep a lid on things, a la Crash Test Dummy. I don't know that song. Who put Whitey in the White House. Oh, you did, baby. Okay, this is a reference-y.

Yep. So, yes. So, I think David went and got the ring on Friday, the Thanksgiving Friday. I did. And then Saturday. Dave got his ring on. Saturday, Thanksgiving Friday. I did. And then Saturday. David got his ring on. Saturday, you had a whole bunch of running around in the morning, and then you were doing a podcast in the afternoon,

and then we were having people over to watch a hockey game. So he had to sit on it. Like, he had to hide it for Friday and Saturday. Hey, sit on it. I had Fonzie hide it for me. In Fonzie's jacket. He hid it inside the jukebox. Yeah.

He knocked it out. It came out in the coinzie's jacket. He hid it inside the jukebox. Yeah. He knocked it out. It came out in the coin return. Gotcha. He's punched it. Yeah. So, yes, and then I think sometimes during Saturday, Dave said, let's go for breakfast tomorrow. On Sunday, I was like, all right, sure. That's something we do.

It's not out of the ordinary. Not that out of the ordinary. No. But he said, let's go have champagne breakfast. No. But he said, let's go have champagne breakfast. No, so then we, and it was a super nice day, a Sunday, and we walked over to Maine and Kingsway. Which was a little bit weird. We usually wouldn't walk.

Yeah, but I was like, all right, it's nice. I just, I had said earlier, I think, I want to take advantage of all the nice weather before it turns super crappy because it's Vancouver, as it is right now. nice weather before it turns super crappy because it's Vancouver, as it is right now. So I didn't think anything of it, and we went to a good place, the Wallflower on Main and

Kingsway or whatever. Yeah, not my favorite. It's all right. It's got a gluten-free menu. It's true. So that's good. But yeah, so then we're walking back, and it was on East 11th. Oh, I forget.

Never forget. Between the Sikh temple. Well, never forget. Between the Sikh temple and the elementary school. Yeah. And he whipped it out. And then he took out the ring. And I don't forget what you said exactly.

It was kind of like, hey. I think I said I have something for you. Yes, I have something for you. You make it work. Abigail. But you didn't mention the fact that since we were walking, and it was such a nice day, like the night before I had hidden the ring in my jacket and I went to put on my jacket and I was like oh it'll be it'll be too warm for that jacket why are you wearing your jacket Dave it's really

nice so you had to look like a jacket on like a crazy person like monk and he's like no no it's fine I'm good I'll be fine I didn't have to look like a crazy person but I had to defend it like a crazy person no no I'm fine I'll wear the jacket I'm gonna wear it but David why are you wearing that one like wear like your thin one. What are you talking about? Why are you wearing that one? Anyway. I love that.

Yeah. So there you go. And he knew that I didn't want it to be in public. Like, don't do it at a restaurant. Certainly do not do it during a show while you're on stage. Oh, that would be the worst. Oh, but I knew Dave would never do that. So that was nice.

That was not a slim, slim possibility of that happening. What are the worst places to propose? Jumbotron? At a divorce. At a divorce. At a divorce settlement. Jumbotron's pretty bad. At a funeral would be pretty...

At someone else's wedding. Oh, hugely. Yeah, someone else's wedding would be bad. Yeah, that's really inconsiderate. Or at somebody else's child birth or no i don't know like in the delivery room that might be the perfect place reach in here and i think you'll find something you were a born ring bearer oh adam sandler movie the ring bearer um what else is the like i mean there there's many, many places that are.

But I think anywhere in public, like a restaurant. Anywhere where people have to look and applaud afterwards. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Although, it'd be nice to do... I always thought that scene from Crocodile Dundee, where everybody's on the subway and

the woman's trapped on the stairs and Dundee's at the other end and the crowd like yeah uh yeah they all work together to get the couple together and then i i would like to be part of one of those crowds where a couple smooches and we all get excited about it yeah yeah like we all kind of helped a little bit like i was i you know i helped get her up over to the thing and uh and then yeah they smooch and everybody goes crazy. Wouldn't that be fun? Like, what else?

The wedding singer? All of the flight crew trying to... Yeah, yeah. Like, everybody helping out the young lovers. I've seen YouTube videos and stuff of people helping. Like, a guy proposing at a movie theater. Or a guy doing it at Central Park. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And they have, like, friends set up. There was one I saw it was a whole bunch of all their friends had some sort of recording device like they had like a video recording device like a camera phone or a camera or something and they were all over the park and they filmed the whole thing from a whole bunch of different angles as it was happening ew you like that i don't yeah but i could I could see, like, it was all edited together all nicely. Sounds like improv everywhere. It was pretty cheesy.

Yeah. That's probably a bad way to propose. Get those guys on the case. Yikes. I saw this thing that was like improv everywhere. Improv everywhere, if people don't know, it's a dumb thing. It's like improv if it was all flash mob yeah style stuff so it's it's stuff that's happening a scene will happen in right in the middle of a food court yeah

and uh and then it's you know usually you don't know if it's real or you don't know if it's yeah yeah but it's kind of weird and fun and weird and uh but uh i saw this video that was like a flash... No, it was a... This choir was promoting themselves and they just did something like that in a food court. Oh, I saw that one. One girl starts, she's on the phone and she starts singing and... Yeah, and it was a real choir and it was

derivative. So I reviewed it. But they made it work. Yeah, sure. Well, I reviewed it. But they made it work. Yeah, sure. Well, you got it. Oh, somebody doesn't like something. Quite the tantrum up above us. Good God.

Those kids. Those kids. Those tanks. Right? Sheesh. So, Abby, any other kind of abby notes that aren't uh specifically engagement or fashion related i think i had an incident that was very traumatic and dave likes to diminish it a little bit go on sounds like we're having trouble sounds like she's

hassling me about what's jacket oh i know what you're talking about yes dave doesn't think it's a big deal but i've had flashbacks. Go on. I want to hear. Of terror. Of onion terror. I really don't like onions. I really don't care for them.

My mom always says, they make everything taste better. I'm like, no, they make everything taste like fucking onions. It's disgusting. I don't like the taste. I don't like the texture. I don't like them cooked. I don't like them raw. I don't like the smell.

So you just don't like no onions? I don't like the texture. I don't like them cooked. I don't like them raw. I don't like the smell. So you just don't like no onions? No. No onions. Thank you. I'm warming to like shallots. Oh, shallots are great. Raw shallots and like a dressing. Oh, shallots are just, oh.

But anyway. And that's an entire salad. Pour some shallots on me. Just raw shallots and a dressing. Yes. Yeah. Just a bowl of dressing with shallots. Sure.

Just a bowl of shallots. Okay. Life is just a bowl of shallots. How about a jean shallot? Will he fit in a bowl? He'll fit in a big bowl. Oh, he'll fit in a bowl of dressing with shallots in it. Sure. Just a bowl of shallots. Okay. Life is just a bowl of shallots. How about a jean shallot? Will he fit in a bowl? He'll fit in a big bowl. Oh, he'll fit in a bowl. Is he dead?

I don't think so. Let's not talk about it. Anyway. Anyway. Something about onions. So we went and had pho, Vietnamese noodle soup, and I always get the same one, and they put green onions sprinkled on the top, and then they also put white onions sliced super thin on top. They usually put the meat in, like the raw beef, the super thin sliced beef.

So it cooks in the broth and it's all tasty. And then they usually put onions on top. And I immediately take all of the onions off and put them on the side. But they look exactly like the noodles. So I thought I'd got them all, and I was just saying to Dave, oh, I love Pho. The noodles, I like the texture,

I like the thickness. They're a good noodle. And then I took the biggest bite of noodles. I was big honking bite, and then I crunched, and I could feel that it was not noodles. It was all onions? It was like 90% onions.

Huge onion party in your mouth? And all the onions are divided? And it had like the tiniest little weird napkins. And like there was nowhere to put it. I did consider running to the bathroom and spitting it out. But I thought I would be a big girl and I would just chew it and just get it down and just move on. And it took me a long time. It doesn't sound like you've moved on.

And then I look over and Dave's just got his phone out and he's just taking like 20 pictures of me. I took 17 pictures. Of my horrible face. And I'm trying to keep it together. And I'm taking the green tea. And I'm drinking my Coke. And I'm just like chewing really. It's like fear factor.

Like you just chew, chew, chew, chew really fast and swallow it. That's what it was like. And then i had onion breath the rest of the night and then oh my god i've had like i've never had like moments of like oh onion oh wow i'm sorry for your trauma i love onions uh uh so i don't know i know i'm definitely in the minority of people who don't care about it. No, there's a big anti-cilantro faction as well. Oh, I can... I like cilantro. I like cilantro, but I can see people go a little crazy with cilantro. Yes. But apparently there's a debate going on that it's like you're born that way, that you hate cilantro.

There's a chemical in some humans. It's just the way you're wired. Wouldn't that be the worst debate to go to? There's a chemical in some humans. Wouldn't that be the worst debate to go to? Like if you're going to a town hall debate and that's what they were talking about? The debate rages on to this day. You're just like, oh god,

the cilantro people are back. Every Monday. I would like to see some of these photos of Abby's face while she ate the onions. It sounds great. I'll put one on the blog. Maybe I'll put 17 on the blog. It sounds like it makes a neat flip book. Although 17 is an odd number. the onions it sounds great sure i'll put one on the blog um maybe i'll put 17 on the blog yeah

it sounds like it makes like a neat flip book it might although 17 is an odd number yeah yeah put a put a nice round 16 sure no problem i'll lose one um and dave what's going on with you in this holiday season yeah uh we it's that we're recording on it's the holiday season so whoop-de-doo and hickory dock and don't forget to hang up your sock it's a Tuesday night we haven't recorded on a non-Saturday in a long time

it's the Tuesday before the Tuesday before Christmas so we are feeling hella festive yeah yeah it's uh what is it 11 more sleeps something like that let's get married a hella festive. Yeah, yeah. It's, what is it? 11 more sleeps? Yeah. Something like that. Jinx.

Let's get married. Jinx, you've got to marry me now. What if that was the... Oh, I would have been married so many times. I'd be a polygamist, guys. Living in the mountains with your wives. I'd rather just buy you a Coke. But some people, If those were the options

Some people would be so Stubborn about it Nope, I'm going through with the wedding So rent yourself a tux Well last night I had a very Vivid dream Oh goodness

That I want to describe for you. I was living... This is going to be weird. Because I don't usually describe dreams on this show. I'm a little hesitant, because usually when the dream describing comes out, you're like, I don't know if this is going to go well. From the little I know, it's going to be good.

Oh, okay. All right. I made him stop. I was like, don't tell me Save it for the podcast I was living in this very apartment With Abby And we were It's weird when that happens in a dream

Because usually it's like, you're in a different place And like, oh, it was my house But it was my childhood house You're living on the set of King of Queens But it had the same kitchen from my work but we were here and we were living it was Vancouver and Vancouver there had been a zombie outbreak

oh goodness but it was like a manageable zombie outbreak the shuffling dead they weren't driving the trains just yet it was a it was a concern but people were still living their lives sure you just had to take extra caution it was like it's kind of like when there's a a gang war in your town you're like don't go to this neighborhood after dark oh yeah it was just like that's where the dream we came from because there was a huge gang shooting just a couple nights ago dream we came from, because there was a huge gang shooting. There was. Just a couple nights ago.

Indeed. But this, it was a zombie problem, and... Can I just say, would it have been great, because it's the holiday season, if they... So whoop-dee-doo, and hickory duck. If on the news they put gang slaying, but they spelled it like snipe.

Was anyone killed? No, but it would just be kind of, or gang attempted slaying. Anyways, continue. Anyway. So I had to go out. I didn't have to go out. I was leaving the house for something that was really stupid. And Abby was like,

but it's, you know, be careful of the zombies. Usually we have to go out in pairs. Right, right. There's a buddy system. But I was very adamant that I had to go to the local park and meet up with a group of people to get Star Trek recipes.

And I got there and I didn't know I couldn't tell you what Star Trek recipes are. I don't think they cook on Star Trek ever. Like Romulan ale or something. Yeah, something like that. That's basically all you can have. Ferengi fettuccine.

But I got there and I got to the park and it was people in their Star Trek uniforms. Voyager. I'm crying. And they were all a couple of them had like those jazzy scooters.

They were all incredibly overweight. And there were no recipes at all They just wanted to explain Races in Star Trek But not Not like Ferengi Or Romulan But like black people

They wanted to discuss Different ethnicities Of humans And I just wanted recipes they wanted to discuss different you know ethnicities of humans and I just wanted recipes so was it that you misread the flyer and it was races of Star Trek and you thought it was recipes

I think it's a dream thing and he hates Star Trek oh man I love it Ferengi fettuccine I think is the takeaway dream thing. And he hates Star Trek. Oh man, I love it. Ferengi fettuccine, I think, is the takeaway. Yeah, it was one of those things that was put on a post. It wasn't like a... It was like a flash mob.

Be here at this time. How do flash mobs come about? Somebody comes up with an idea. Twitter. Is it all just internet-internized? I think it's all internet-related. I want to go to a flash mob that only three other people show up to. Hey, we're going to dance. Is it all just internet-internized? I think it's all internet-related. Have there... I want to go to a flash mob that only three other people show up to.

Like, it's the worst idea, and I'm on board, but no one else is. Yeah, it's like a flash mob where you... You tweet where everything was canceled. Yeah. Or, like, someone acts like they're getting tons of people on board, and they're just lying to themselves and to me. And you. Yeah.

And one other person. And it's something really embarrassing that involves... That's a good dream. That's awesome. Usually the dream descriptions are kind of dull and convoluted and confusing. Confusing, and you can't articulate what happened. But that was good. It was quick.

But that was amazing. It happened within one block. Yeah, it had funny stuff going on. There were jazzy scooters. Yeah, jazzy scooters. So that's what's been going on with you. A lot of dreaming. Pretty much.

Klingons, yeah. It's Christmas time. Yep. Whoop-de-doo. It's Christmas time. And hickory duck. There's no need to be afraid. Yeah.

Have either of you been to Vancouver's Christmas market? No. You? Yes, sir. Oh, good for you. Yeah. The German one? It is...

Vaguely European. Yeah, it's supposed to be German. How so? Weihnachtsmarkt. Yeah, I don't know. That's what it's called, isn't it? It's just called the Vancouver Christmas market. Oh, I thought... But people refer to it as the German Christmas market, and I don't know why That's what it's called, isn't it? It's just called the Vancouver Christmas Market. Oh, I thought...

But people refer to it as the German Christmas Market, and I don't know why. Oh, because of the... There's German vendors and stuff. Yeah, German vendors. It's spelled with a W. Yes. Wim Wenders. Well done.

Well done, all three of us. Who's Wim Wenders? He's a filmmaker. He did Wings of Desire? Yeah. Gotcha. Oh, okay. Which was made into City of Angels, which was horrible.

Wait a minute. Wings of Desire is amazing. Is Nicolas Cage was made into City of Angels, which was horrible. But Wings of Desire is amazing. Is Nicolas Cage? Is that the one? Oh, yeah. Meg Ryan? Goo Goo Dolls, big hit from City of Angels. Oh, yeah. Columbo was in the German one.

I don't want to wait just to know. For our lives to be over. You're a lot. Anyway. Six pence down the road. Guys, let's get serious. Yeah, I'm ready. Christmas Market.

Christmas Market. I went to this thing. Well, it's a serious. Yeah, I'm ready. Christmas market. Christmas market. I went to this thing. Well, it's a block from where I work. And someone at work was like, oh, you can get a coupon from this other place that'll give you half off. And then you go there. And it's only $2 to get in during the day. Half off is the guy who runs the German Christmas market.

Half off. It's a bit of a stretch. Werner Half Off. See? She made it work. It's more of a russian name though isn't it abby knows how to make it work uh anyway i went to the russian christmas market uh but i went they said it was how it was it's only two dollars uh during the daytime uh but apparently the daytime ends at 2 p.m. Okay. It gets dark early, David. Yeah, that's when they expect their big rush. 2.30 rush.

The Chinese dentist appointment rush. So I didn't go. You always get it that way. You always laugh at that one. Because it was after 2 o'clock. So I actually started handing out over my money. And I didn't bother getting a coupon because I couldn't find them. So they were like, it's $5.

And I'm like, here you go. Like, I was too embarrassed to take my money back. Sure. But I did. I actually went through with it. I was like, actually, you know what? This is bad. So what's in there?

So you didn't go in. But then a couple of days later, I did go in before 2 o'clock for $2. And what's in there? So you didn't go in. But then a couple days later I did go in before 2 o'clock for $2. And what's in there? Nothing. There are crafts and food. Some kind of you know, German.

There are German people selling German food. You can get sausages. Raclette. A big Swiss favorite. Pretzels. Smok favorite. Pretzels. Sure. Smokies. Pretzels, as they're known in Germany.

Yeah, as they're known pretty much everywhere but here. Wow. But, yeah, you pay money to get into this place. To go buy stuff. To go buy, yeah, more stuff. Is there music? Free music? There wasn't at, you know, 1.30.

But they... Yeah, and the food, not so good. I had this... People from my work were like, oh yeah, I've tried that, I've tried that, I've tried that, it's not so good. You need to get the pulled pork sandwich, which isn't very Christmassy.

Not German. But it was from the Vancouver Alpen Club. Oh, good for them. Ricola. Yeah, it's all local, German-related things. from the Vancouver Alpen Club. Oh, good for them. Ricola. Yeah. It's all local, like, German related things. Organizations and stuff. Right. But places

that are open at all times that you can go to for free. You can just go and get stuff. Yeah. You can walk into without paying a cover charge. And buy whatever you want. And I don't know why people would go. There is a beer garden. Spelled B-I-E-R. Probably.

Yeah, I like that. And then, yeah, no, it is a tourist trap. And people are, at night, people are lined up around the block for it. Oh, because it's magical. People just want to get in on there. If you go there and it's full of people at night, it's kind of magical. And fun. People are singing O Tannenbaum.

Silver bells and stuff. Yeah, I think going in the afternoon was my mistake but i uh i'm gonna live with it silver bells and sausage smells um silver glockin that's silver bells no um uh yeah they i haven't been in. I, uh, I haven't bothered to. I don't, because whenever I think Christmas crafts, I think, uh, two popsicle sticks glued together with yarn, uh, around them making a Christmas star. Do you know what I'm talking about? Or kite, Christmas kite.

Christmas kite. Uh, or a, uh, reindeer with, um, pipe cleaner antlers and googly eyes like, uh, on a can of cane. Sure. It's not that. It's like a bohemian crystal. Oh, like... Expensive garbage.

Knit wear and jewelry. Although there are things that like... I didn't get this, but I could probably go for a mulled cider. Oh, sure. A baked apple. Yeah, they did have baked apples. Did they? Oh, wow. That sounds alright. You got right into it. You're doing something Christmassy. Oh, sure. A baked apple? Yeah, they did have baked apples. Did they? Oh, wow. Huh.

That sounds all right. You got right into it. You're doing something Christmassy. Yep. Yeah, going to a Christmas market by myself for five minutes and hating. Sounds like Christmas to me. I do like Christmas. Like, I do like Christmassy things.

There's a guy who roasts chestnuts on the street. He's a crazy person. Yeah, yeah. He's a crazy person. Yeah, yeah. He's not a vendor or anything. But I like Christmassy smells. I like Christmassy tastes. You like Christmassy music?

Yeah, that sounds. Let's see, sights, sure. And music. I like all five senses of Christmas. Oh, that's pretty good. What's your favorite Christmassy feeling? Probably, that's a good what's your favorite christmasy feeling uh probably that's a tough one i'm gonna say that my favorite is christmasy sights i like people uh wearing hilarious sweaters sure i like uh i like christmas lights i like displays sure windows and stuff yeah yeah all

that kind of stuff i'm not as big on the christmas time like food and uh christmas time i like that peanuts christmas album that's a great christmas there's a lot of nuts in christmas food so maybe yeah it's not it's not really my time of year um uh i don't really have i haven't picked a time of year yet but uh this this is not up um what are the front runners uh? I would say I like... I'm pretty good with April. I like April. Got a lock on April.

Hate the whole summer. Summer's out. Don't blame him. October. I like October. I think it might be October. April, October? Yeah.

I think I'm going to nominate for myself. October's probably in the frontrunner. Okay, cool. Keep people out there. Keep watching those polls. October's the leader But April is charging hard behind Oh absolutely

A and O Now Graham what's been going on with you in the two days since we last spoke Actually A lot of it I think three days Well Christmas wise I watched for the first time ever In my life Christmas like a perennial Christmas classic, White Christmas, starring Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye.

Don't get it at all. Yeah, I don't care for it. Don't get why it's a classic. Don't get why people go nuts for it. But the song, White Christmas... Yeah, it's from that movie. No, it's from a movie called Holiday Inn. Oh, and then they reprise it in White Christmas?

Yeah, I think so. I think they were like, well, this is such a hit. Let's make a movie about this. Oh, I didn't know. Because they do sing White Christmas at the end of White Christmas. So maybe it did come from Holiday Inn. Maybe the whole thing's a spinoff. But it's a racist movie, right?

It's about supremacy, right? Yeah, I know. That's why I didn't like it. It kind of doesn't age well like a lot of those movies. Birth of a Nation was what I was going for. Which at the time made total sense. No, White Christmas, I just didn't. It's a lot of the times that I would see kind of these wayward classics,

and then I would go, oh, I get it. It's a lovely... It's a wonderful life. Yeah. It's a great movie. This movie is about, like, two kind of wayward dudes who are trying to have sex with these two women,

and they go to an alpine ski lodge, and there's a guy that's hard up, and he wants to join the army, but he's too old. So they... Have you seen it? That's relatable. This is literally what the movie's about.

So they decide to have a show at the ski lodge. Now this show, even in 1950s dollars, I'm thinking about a $12 million show. They're going in. All out. Yeah, they're putting all in. They're going to do one show at this alpine Lodge in a room that holds about 300 people max. Sure.

So I'm assuming everybody in that room is paying between $10,000 and $40,000. And, yeah, it just, like, it doesn't make any sense. Like, it's just leap after leap of faith. And the whole time, you know, like, Bing Crosby used to beat up his kids or something. That's the thing that he did. That's the running joke? Well, it was when I was watching it. I kept doing an impression of him.

But yeah, I know I even asked on Twitter, why is this a classic? And nobody really responded. So I kind of feel like it's not. Maybe it's because of the song. Yeah, that's what I got. Because people love the song. It's a great song. It's one of the, you know,

it's a really good Christmas song. Yeah, and he's a good singer and Danny Kaye's good. They're good in it, but it's not a good, I don't know, it's like I watched it and it wasn't,

I just don't get it. Like I really just, because it's kind of sleazy. The movie is like about these two guys trying... Do they bang him? Do they... Oh, yeah. And the sex scene is so graphic.

It's like in the 50s and you're like... You know, Bing Crosby just keeps saying like, cut your nails. And I was like, I don't want to know what that's about. It's just revolting, you know? It's Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye. Yeah. Who is... Danny Kaye is one of these people who, uh.

If Kaye's diamonds. Like old. Yeah. Kiss begins with Kaye. People are like, oh yeah. My favorite old timey actors are, uh, Mickey Rooney and, uh, Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye. And who's not, like, it's like an obscure one. He's nowhere near as famous as the other two.

Yeah. Yeah. Why do people like this guy? Danny Kaye, I think he was in a thousand movies in his day. Or why did he not did his star not carry on after his death? Like all those other guys.

Oh, because he didn't beat his kids. And they didn't have a story to tell. He's a super nice guy who loves his family. Nobody cares. I couldn't pick him out of a lineup. I could. Unless the other people were Bob Hope, Bing Crosby, Jimmy Stewart.

Yeah. I guess the other guy's Danny Kaye. Does he dance with a vacuum cleaner? No, they do the dance with feathers. Anyways, watching that, on the last episode,

we were talking about Christmas movies that weren't Christmas movies, like movies that just happened to take place around Christmas. And we put it out there. We had said Gremlins and Die Hard, Go, Lethal Weapon. And people responded. Some good ones that I didn't think of. Batman Returns. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. That one's great. A classic old black and white. The Thin Man. That takes place at Christmas. Oh, with Danny Kaye. Better Off Dead with John Cusack. Oh, with all the skiing.

Yeah. Eyes Wide Shut takes place. Oh, yeah. There's a Christmas tree in every room or something. Yeah, yeah. Every shot had a Christmas tree in it or something. Catch your nails. Yeah. Catch your nails. That was from, that was a Christmas tree in every room or something. Yeah, yeah. Every shot had a Christmas tree in it or something. Cut your nails.

Yeah. Cut your nails. That was from, that was an homage to White Christmas. And then Brazil was another one. There's also Black Christmas, which is like a murder horror movie. Yeah, right. Where a whole bunch of girls get killed. It's also got Christmas in the title, so it's like not. It's less on the, yes.

It's just, yeah, Christmas is like a's like it's less on the yes it's just yeah christmas is like a uh a motif part of the whole deal but not uh yeah yeah i like that i like the crux of the story but yeah it's it counts i would say yeah sure um and then uh the other thing from last week that we talked about was we were talking two weeks ago about how in forest gump when he washes his face with a towel it comes out with a smiley face and how dumb you said that was i hate it yeah because he invented the smiley face so angry and then uh because what does he invent in that movie like what it happens yeah yeah it happens uh he doesn't so much he starts the running craze it happens oh oh does that... The jogging craze.

I didn't get that out of it. Well, yeah, that was the running back and forth. I just assumed that people have always known how to run. No, but he started the craze. And a whole bunch of people after the 80s did that. But he affects history in numerous ways. He calls the Watergate Hotel because something's going on. Yeah, and then he also says

like John Lennon gets him to come up with the lyrics to Imagine basically. People in China have no religion too. And then didn't he do something he met John Kennedy.

Didn't really affect him though. Just had to go pee. He invented the box of chocolates? He invented the box of chocolates? He was on the American ping pong team. Yeah. In the book, actually, I think he saves Mao's life. Is that right?

Mao is going to drown. Like, I'm serious. Oh, wow. and like i'm serious oh wow um but uh somebody on the max maximum fun forum uh owen m uh said hey you guys should do a one-time segment where forrest gump invents a bunch of stuff like if forrest gump was around from the year 2000 to now what would he have invented so we put it out there and uh man oh man did this one gentleman, Duncan C he took up the charge like nobody's business.

These are just a few that he wrote in. 2001. Forrest goes to the library and reads the encyclopedia entry about the smiley face. See, he starts at the origin. Realizing it has several errors and omissions, he carefully modifies the page with a typewriter,

jar of paste, and a pair of scissors. A young Jimmy Wales has been watching all this unfold from across the library. He turns to stare creepily into the camera. Founder of Wikipedia. He does stare creepily at things. Is that a meme? Yeah, Forrest fills in a crossword with numbers.

I think that's my favorite. Accidentally discovers Sudoku. Let's see here. There was one more that I liked. Forrest gets a job testing psychosis medication on animals. He shows a new friend, a British ringtone talent scout, around the facility. His friend takes a particular interest in the frog. Comes up with the crazy frog ringtone talent scout around the facility. His friend takes a particular interest in the frog.

Comes up with the crazy frog ringtone. Well, yeah, that was a little telegram. British ringtone talent scout. And this was the last one. This is how far Duncan was willing to stretch it. An accident at the Bubba Gump chemical factory

I guess they expanded exposes Forrest to concentrated levels of silver sulfide which changes the color of his skin to a deep blue. Staggering disoriented through the streets seeking medical assistance, he accidentally invents the Blue Man Group avatar and

Bluetooth technology. David shaking his head no. I was shaking my head yes. Pretty great. So that was great. Great response, everybody. Top drawer.

Yep. Definitely. Big fans of you, everybody. Yep. I'm a big fan of you. And this was the weird thing that happened this week. I call it a Christmas surprise. Oh, fun.

I think on this show, I've mentioned a show that I used to watch when I was a kid called Kid Street. Yeah. And that's the one where a brother and a sister. Yes. Would, it was a game show. Yeah. And they would be in, the set was, they were in race cars.

That's right. And they would clap above their heads. That's what you remember in graphic detail, yeah. Yeah, graphic. The host was a guy named Kevin Frank. He used to run out every time and jump on a mini trampoline. And I watched it every day for years. Kevin Frank, growing up, he was like a star.

He was your guy. He was a star in my head. Just today, logging into Facebook, Kevin Frank requested to be my friend on Facebook. Awesome. Now, if you had told me that when I was a kid, I would have registered Facebook way before Jesse Eisenberg did. First of all, you would have to explain Facebook. Before Jesse Eisenberg. But isn't that something?

That's pretty great. That's worth getting excited about. It's like if Fred Penner asked to be my friend, I'd be like, I'm Sharon. So exciting. But not Lois or Bram. Screw them. They don't have computers. It's weird when you're, like now that we are grown up and we're sort of semi in Canadian showbiz.

Sure. On the fringes, let's say. Yeah. The lunatic fringes. Internet fringes, let's say. The lunatic fringes. Internet fringes. It's weird when you kind of run in the same circles as people who were famous

when you were a kid. Oh, that guy. It's great. I was beyond thrilled. Could he retire from his kid street money? I don't know. I mean, I don't know. He's out in Toronto.

That's all I know. How did he know to friend you? I don't know. It's just the greatest thing. It just happened, and it's wonderful. He knows who you are. I'm excited. If Kevin Frank's a listener to the show,

I've always been a big fan. Your work on Kid Street was great. I'm super excited. If Ron Oliver is a listener, I would really like to meet Ralph the Happy Contest Goose. Done and done. I don't think anyone else watched the Ron Oliver show. No, but you know what?

Dreams can come true. I'm evidence. Yeah. Look at me, babe. I'm with you. You know you got to have them. You know you got to be strong. Dream.

Hey, is that a knock at the door? Oh, look who it is! It's Emmett Hall. Yes! And Chris Gauthier. Hi, guys! Of the once together, but now not together, but back together for one time only, Sack of Corn. Yes, the once defunct comedy duo known as Sack of Corn. Yes, the once defunct comedy duo known as Sack of Corn

is now refunct. Awesome. Bring in the funct. Just for the season. The Christmas season. The holiday miracle. Exactly. It's not funny, it's true.

It's a miracle. It's funny because it's true. And we come betting gifts. Oh, gifts, David. Oh, I love gifts. Oh, okay. Oh, animated gifts. Oh, gifts, David. Oh, I love gifts. Oh, okay. Oh, animated gifts. Abby, you get none. Oh,

the letter D. That starts with your name. A chocolate letter D made out of Belgian chocolate. Ooh, finest. And the letter G. Graham gets the letter G with Latvian chocolate. Finer than Belgian. Is it?

Ah, spirits. Ah! with Latvian chocolate. Finer than Belgium. Is it? And spirits. Ah! It's got Hacker Pshor. Pshor! They were on special!

Two bottles of It goes in your Christmas market because it's a German beer. I'll return it tomorrow to the Christmas market. And there's two extra Christmassy things in the bottom.

Oh, canes of candy. Oh, thank you, Abbott. Season's treats. And Chris, I assume. I assume this was it. Of course. The candy canes were mine. And actually, Abby can have some of the candy cane.

Yeah, you can have some. Sack of corn. Sack of corny. Now, the reason why we are here is because eons passed when we were... Many moons ago. We barons, we had written a sack of corn Christmas pageant. And the group split before we could ever mount the production. Back now.

Yeah. For about five more minutes. For as long as this wonderful Christmas pagemas pageant it'll be good it'll be good so and we're gonna get some help from all three of you okay i can't wait um without further ado we now present the production sack of corns christmas pageant Sack of Corn's Christmas Pageant Glad tidings to ye. And Yuletide greet tidings. Every year comes around, but once a year to this tiding time. A wenceslas time that was sales to this very spot. Where west meets east in gay apparel.

The Weest Pole. Did you know that an olden time tidying tale was brought to being in the Weest Pole? Yes, I did. Let us regale you with the story of how this first tale of seasonal orientar came to be. We hark the herald all the way back to the hearth of the story, to the capital of the Weest Pole. Bethleville. Ding dong. Ding dong. Ding dong.

Ding dong. It's a merry time in the Weest, Weest Pole. Weest, Weest Pole. Weest, Weest Pole. Ding dong. Ding dong. Ding dong. Ding dong.

I'm the mayor of Bethleville. My name's St. Nick and I spread goodwill. Here you go, have some. Ding dong, ding dong. I make the stockings because I'm the baker. Hot out of the oven, so don't you manger. Ding dong, ding dong. On the local chimney sweep.

I sell matchbooks in the street. Cause I'm a shoeshine boy. Ding dong, ding dong. ding dong, ding dong. Tis the season, so get your fill, down in the vill of Bethleville. Ding dong, ding dong, ding dong. But just over the horizon strode a strider, quite lost, hefting his bindle through the snow and the frost. I've wandered off the path. I've lost my way. I'm cold. I'm scared. I'm Chris Gauthier.

Ding dong, ding dong, ding dong, ding dong. What's this? As I crest this hill, now entering the ville of Bethlehville. Ho, ho. God rest ye. Oh, and God rest ye to ye as well. My name's Emmett, and I'm all the characters except the baker in this town. Mmm, and God rest ye to ye as well. My name's Emmett and I'm all the characters except the baker in this town. Mmm, stockings.

I sure could use one of those. I'm so cold and hungry at the same time. Why do you not go to the shop of our mayor, Saint Nick? I'm sure he'd gladly help you if you help him make his toys for all the reindeers. Yes, he would. Which way does he yonder? Just follow that star, south-east of here,

to St. Nick's Workshop. Oh my goodness, thank you for the hark. So the Wayfarer continued his travels through snow, whistling wassails throughout the Weest Pole. Then he approached Mayor's Nick's shop. He plopped down his sack and proceeded

to knock. God rest ye. Is that the toy shop of Mayor St. Nick? The door hasn't opened yet. Run the door. God rest ye. Is that the toy shop of Mayor St. Nick? God rest ye, merry

gentlemen. Yes, it is a shop. I'm one of the toy-making fairies of St. Nick. Yeah. Could you take me to him? Would you like me to take you to him? Oh. He's just through that decked-out hall. Oh my, oh me! So many toys, so many reindeers! My worker fairies are real dandy, but this workload will take its toll, surely.

Then, puffter! I'm here to help, Mayor St. Nick. Excelsior! Any help would be radical, dude. What do you have to offer? Oh, but what can I do? I mean, all I have is this sack of Kringle. Kringle, eh? What does it do? No, it only seasons greets. Watch. Excelsior! That is just what we need.

For the reindeer's toys? No, well, I don't understand. What does my Kringle do to help exactly? Hey, what's your name? Chris. Chris, eh? Hmm, Chris Kringle. Well, Chris Kringle, there is much work to be done tomorrow, so I recommend a good sleep. So no trolling the Yuletide cattle, you hear? Okay, good night. So Chris lay for sleep in his jolly holly bed

where sugarplum eggs did nog in his head. But when the bell tolled, oh, clock on his clock, Kris Kringle awoke to a yule-timetide shock. Oh, Kris Kringle, it is I, the ghost of Santa Claus. Let nothing you dismay, goodly apparition. I've come to grant these warnings three. I am but a Kringler. What use of warnings have I? Ah, you've answered the first riddle.

For you must always follow the Fa-la-la-la-la. And what law is that, Santa's ghost? Why, the Fa-la-la law states that you must place cringly creche in the now, the nonce, and future past. Hee hee hee hee. Your advice is heated, Santa Claus. The morrow came round

with a snowy red glow. And Chris readied Kringle for all the weest poll. For reindeers and reindeers and rain girls and rain boys. Chris springed his Kringle along with Saint Nick's toys. So follow that star in a sort of weesterly way to join in with the reindeers

and celebrate Christmas Day. The end. Amazing. Hey guys. Thanks for coming around. Well that's it. amazing hey guys thanks for coming well that's it what do you want

I just want to say Chris it was a pleasure joining you again and may we never see each other again oh okay yeah that's sad do you guys want to shake hands thanks for bringing me out hey thanks guys for showing up.

A Christmas shake, everyone. We did a Christmas shake. Is there anything that you would like to plug before you head back out into the snowy winter sea? The best kind. What sale? In fact, yes, I am also with the Sunday Service comedy group. All gentlemen who've been on this podcast not aaron no he's he deserves honorable mention though but taz ryan kevin

craig myself we've actually started our own podcast called the sunday service presents a beautiful podcast and the first one was released just in time for Christmas. Merry Christmas, everybody. Merry Christmas to podcasters everywhere. So go to thesundayservice.ca and click the link and download it. God bless. Yeah. Everyone.

It was nice. Take care in your journey, gentlemen. Let me get the door for you. Thank you. Bye, Chris Gauthier. Bye. journey, gentlemen. Let me get the door for you. Thank you. Bye, Chris Colchick! Bye! Bye, Ellen! Bye, sack of corn!

Possibly forever! Oh, look! They're dying! Hey, Dave! Yeah? What would you say to a round of Overheard? I'd love it! Overheard.

Overheard. Well, that was nice of them. Oh, that was amazing. Yeah, oh, goodness. Wasn't it great? That's the third time Emmett has stopped by Christmas-wise. It was a charm. Yeah.

It's true. He's our Christmas charm. Chocolate charm. Overheard, I thought. Yes. We should do. Let's. Why not? In this Christmas festive season season you don't need to start talking like them now i know but it's addictive right sounds fun yeah it does it sounds uh like you get a high collar and you just go oh yeah you're a dandy put on a hoity

voice yeah you wear a waistcoat with like a hundred buttons oh so many buttons so so hard to get ready for your... Yeah. And also, it cools you down when you're trying to get erotic later. Yeah, that's right. It's good for chastity. Yeah, it makes you reconsider your... Yeah, you have to take off eight pairs of bloomers.

Your pooey choices. Yeah. Like, maybe she's not the one. Oh, well, you'll never know until you try. Bloomers. Overhers. If this is your first time listening to the podcast, pretty self-explanatory things that people have overheard.

We like to start with the guest, Abby. That's me. Miss Abby Five Times Campbell. You got one? You ready? I do. I have one. I love it.

I was at Oak Ridge Mall in Vancouver. One of our finer malls. It really is. It really is. It's got fancy stores there. Occasionally, I'll be walking through there. Not that I go that often, but I've seen buckets in the middle of the mall catching drips. Drips.

Yeah, but they have a garbage can that when you put in the garbage, it says, thank you. Oh, really? There's a button and the door opens up and you throw it in. Their bathrooms are very clean yeah so if you're in the mood to throw some garbage yeah yeah awesome thanks abby thanks guys no so i was i was just walking around and by myself and i was walking by i think it was like a circuit city or rogers cellular store like it was something electronic store and there was a robot a robot a robot out front and it was one of those that like it barely looks human right it kind of looked like wally sure okay yeah or maybe a little truck johnny five johnny five like a

like a modern 21st century johnny five yeah but but on like, what tanks don't have wheels? They have tracks. Caterpillar tracks. Are we playing password? He had those. And he was just being all robot-y in front of the store. And then I hear him say, if you're taking pictures, be sure to get my good side. And there's a whole bunch of people taking pictures.

He's the conceited robot. What is his good side? Vanity bot. bunch of people taking pictures he's the conceited robot what is his good side vanity bot he seemed pretty symmetrical to me do either of you know your good side he had a mole on one side just a computer chip on one side yeah that's my money maker uh good side do you have a good side? I don't know if I do. I don't know. Neither side if I don't have my coffee in the morning. Right, guys? I don't know. Right?

I guess. Let me see. Oh, upside down. The inside. The lens cap on. The inside. The lens cap on. The inside of the camera. My good side is the side with the part of hair. Oh, yeah.

With a part of hair. Just the part of it. See the side with the other thing. This area looks weird to me. Yeah. The temple. Yeah, me too. The blood so.

Yeah. My temple blood so. My temple bled so. Dave, you've got an overheard. Recover. Bounce back, bounce back. I do have an overheard. Oh, do you? Yes, mine is transitory in nature. I was on a bus,

a bus to work at 9.15 in the morning. And a guy on the bus, I wrote this all on Twitter, but I think it bears repeating. A guy on the bus was playing harmonica,

but like a really sad, mournful harmonica like you would play at a funeral for a blues man. Like you would play if you were on blues man like yeah like you would play uh if you were on the bus going to prison okay oh okay yeah or on a movie about a bus to prison or a movie about hobos you're going somewhere sad so sad but also a movie from 50 years ago because they don't make movies about hobos anymore. They're all about...

They would if I was in charge. Yeah, the hobos all know Bartitsu now. And then a... This wasn't even the craziest guy on the bus. A crazier guy got on and sat right next to the harmonica player and started talking to him about the harmonica and the music biz. The history of the harmonica. And that man's name was John Popper.

Ghost of John. The harmonica guy was talking about how... Isn't he busy playing the harmonica? No, he took it out of his mouth to talk to this guy. Oh, yeah, because if you're playing harmonica on the bus, the last thing you want to do is be chatted up by someone. You do not want any attention at all. Yeah.

So this crazy guy starts talking to him, and the harmonica guy is talking about how, oh, yeah, I've been up on stage a few times, but I don't play it for money. I play it to make people smile. By the way, nobody was smiling on the bus. Mission failed. Everybody was wicked uncomfortable.

And the crazier guy, the non-harmonica guy says, Hey, you know that song by Dire Straits, Money for Nothing? There's a lot of truth in that song. Wow. I guess. Also, chicks for free. Think about about it yeah also how much are the harmonicas they throw around the uh the f word for homosexuals on in that song quite a bit oh do they really yeah interesting i didn't know learn something new every day uh so yeah a lot of truth in that song Yeah, a lot of truth Now Graham My Overheard also comes courtesy of public transit

Oh, transit Thank you, transit Transit truly is the gift giver this time of year That's true That's right I was outside of the bus And as I was walking There was a bus at a bus stop And there was a blind gentleman Tapping along the side of the bus and a uh as i was walking there was a bus at a bus stop and there was a blind

gentleman tapping along the side of the bus with his cane uh and i was about to go uh help and somebody else kind of got to him beat you to it yeah i talked you out of it yeah and he uh he went up to the blind guy uh and said, are you trying to get on the bus? And the blind guy with a kind of indecipherable accent said, of course, why else would I be walking like this? Awesome. Great. Great sassitude from the blind guy. I got a million of them.

I got a million of them do you think his other senses are raised like his sense of humor his sense of sarcasm satire his sense of irony is higher than most humans it was great though because it was just of course

somebody's trying to help him but he really is like a character out of scrubs um funny blind guy um how much how familiar are you with scrubs not super but just two episodes in a row you've talked about it yeah i know it's weird i didn't mean to but i realized as it was coming out of my mouth i'm like i'm just gonna make it seem like a watch scrub i've seen it but i don't i don't know any of the characters' names. Sure. Okay.

I know their names are... Okay. Zach, Cody. Sarah Chalk has a boy's name. Okay. Cody. Yeah. That's Cody.

Zach is Zach Braff. Yeah. Black guy is... What was his name in Clueless? Turk? No. Or is that his name in this? Yeah.

That's his name in this. Turk. Broda. And then his girlfriend... in this? Yeah. That's his name in this. Turk. Froda. And then his girlfriend. Or wife. Yeah. The Mexican-Hispanic lady. Yeah.

Selena? Yeah. Horatio Sanz. And then funny janitor. Yeah. Oh, and then the mad doctor. Oh, yeah. Who is calling Zach by girls' names.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then that lady from Drew Carey. by girls' names. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then that lady from Drew Carey. Yeah, Dr. John McGinley. We also have overheards. We should stunt cast that sometime. What, Scrubs? We would have to know the characters' names before we would tackle a stunt cast. Okay, I know who I would soundcast as the Latina lady.

Rosabraze? Horatio Sanz? No, the girl from Glee. Oh, she should. Oh, yeah, yeah. Pretty good. Who would you cast as the... She's Jewish, not Hispanic, I believe.

But she can play it. But she can do it. It's acting. No, no, no, no, no. The Hispanic one. Oh, Santana. Okay, gotcha. She's kind of black.

No, no. Yeah, so it's the Hispanic lady from Scrubs, isn't she? Yeah, a little bit. What about the guy that plays Turk? Who would you Stuncast that? Well, I don't have that. Rampage Jackson. That's it.

Well, this has been great, guys. Awesome, guys. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Do we have any overheards from our listeners? We do. It's a Christmas miracle. So many.

Our first comes courtesy of the German Christmas market, the aforementioned Christmas market. Okay. Carrie F. writes, there was a large group of people gathered around one of the food kiosks, watching and photographing a large block of cheese melting under a heater. Broccoli. Did you see that? What's that? Bro melting under a heater. Broccoli. Did you see that? What's that? That's broccoli.

Broccoli? Yes. R-A-C-L-E-T-T-E. That's just a melted cheese under a heater? Yes. You eat the heater. You melt cheese under a heater onto another heater. And then you make a sandwich.

Dumbfounded, my friend and I watched these people take a photo, or take photo after photo after photo of this block of cheese. The best part was when one person in the group says, hey, will you take my picture with the cheese? Make sure to get my good side. Get the cheese's good side. Oh, man, good stuff. So what is it called? Rock-la rock of let and it's just it's

a specific potato there are potatoes there's little pearl onions there's other oh you hate that and there's other little there's little like the tiny little gherkins and it's just there's two ways to do it there's a big fancy way to do it that's this big you take like the whole block like the whole wheel of cheese. You cut it in half. And then you put it under a heater. Kind of like how shawarma is. Right.

But it's not vertical. It's horizontal. On a rotisserie? Yeah, and it doesn't spin. The heat doesn't move and the cheese doesn't move. A panini press. And then it melts a layer and you scrape it off. And then you eat it with potatoes and bread and onions and gherkins.

And this is different from Rosti. Yes. Which is different. And then Roklet is very different than fondue. Wow. Well, yeah, everyone knows that. Yeah. Learning.

It's part of the podcast experience. Learning about cheese. Our second overheard comes from Karen S. Karen S. writes, my husband and I were standing in line to see Donald Glover in San Francisco when I overheard a group of under 21 year olds behind me

reminiscing about their youth. The first one says, why did I ever listen to those ska bands? The second guy waits a beat, sighs, and says we all have our ska bands. The second guy waits a beat, sighs, and says, we all have our ska face. Like that movie, Ska Face. Say hello to my little friend. Pick it up, pick it up, pick it up.

Those are the famous lines from that movie. Yeah. You cock-a-roach. You ska-ka-roach. You ska-ka-roach? You scock-a-roach? You scock-a-roach! Oh, man. We really did some great work. This one comes from

Will S. I recently started listening to the show. Welcome, Will S. Oh, thank you. I assume that's what he would say. I've got an overheard for you. A few minutes ago, I walked into the kitchen in my office to get my lunch and walked into the middle of two co-workers having a discussion. One of them said to the other, I thought the remote control was making a buzzing sound, but it turns out my smoke alarm was going off.

That doesn't make any sense. How old were these co-workers? Oh, I don't know. They must have been in their early 90s. I think the remote control should make a noise. But like a smoke alarm noise? Yeah, I wish. Like an eee.

Is that a thing? Are there remote controls that have a thing like for cordless phones? Yes. Really? Yeah, they exist. Why don't I have one? And I don't even lose my remote control. Because you never shopped at the sharper image.

That's true. That's right. We stayed out of Spencer's gifts. Yeah, because that's a real good gag gift. Practical inventions. Well, the gag is hiding the remote. Oh, yeah. Finding it is the reveal.

Yeah. Burn, you found the remote. The denouement. Oh, you found it immediately. Burn. It would be a good gag gift if the noise was a fart noise. And it just kept going until you find it. Or if you change the channel.

Patent pending. That and pending. That's right, yeah. Trademark, trademark. Yeah, we will absolutely make the fart remote. Why not? Wide mouth Billy Bass remote. Yeah. There's all sorts of things we could do.

Next Christmas, everybody. Take me to the river. Now change the fucking channel. to the river. Now change the fucking channel. Great work, team. It's a real Scafe's moment. In addition to overheards that have been written in, we also

have a telephone voicemail activated system. It's fart activated. Please leave your message after the toot. And if you would like to leave us a message, our telephone number is 206-339-8328.

That's 206-339- Hi, Dave and Graham. I have a one word overheard for you. I was at the mall the other day looking for a parking spot. When ahead of me, two cars started to back out. They proceeded to back out right into each other.

And as the two drivers got out to kind of survey the damage, the younger lady on the right looked up at the older lady on the left, did a double take and yelled, Mom! So that's mother-daughter traffic accident? Yeah, that's a real parent trap. I wonder who taught her to drive. Right, women drivers. Yeah, I hope it wasn't bring your daughter to the mall day

to the mall to work on your driving though bring your daughter to the mall day and shop till you drop and then back into her car scar phase i don't remember when we all went through our scar phase i was a real cutter what if that was the new meaning of the word cut up he's a real cut up i mean he cuts seriously he's cut himself up good one thank you stop podcasting yourself uh my name is Albro. I have an overseen. I was driving behind. I was driving to Pittsburgh.

I was there for vacation in Pittsburgh. And I saw a van, and it was a plumbing company van, which had a license plate that said Van-gina. I don't understand. I love it. I don't understand at all. I think the point is that nothing's related. It's a plumbing company in Pennsylvania,

but the license plate has nothing to do with that. It just says Van-gina. It's just a guy who wanted that. I saw a Range Rover vehicle in front of a design shop with the license plate designer. Oh, nice. Yeah, I felt like smashing in the window. I almost did. What kind of a design shop?

What does that mean? Oh, like a furniture. Furniture and housewares. Oh, okay. Because I thought you maybe meant graphics. Oh, yeah. Then I would have respected it. Or would I?

No, they were an interior designer. Okay. Not an exterior designer. Or landscaper, as we call it. Or vagina. One more, do you have? Yeah. Yeah, Yoda.

Hi, Graham and Dave and possible guests. This is an overheard slash overseen. This is Everton, Vancouver. I just got off the SkyTrain, and I saw two people drop acid. It was pretty ridiculous. The girl just kept putting the paper in and out of her mouth, and they kept staring out of the SkyTrain and talking about all the crazy shit they saw. I wish I could have stayed on longer, but the best hurt I got out of them was,

what's this stop? Oh, yeah, Edmonds. And then, oh, hey, remember when you said what this stop was? I thought you said outer space. Thanks, guys. Bye. There's nothing quite like watching a couple kids that are pretending to be high. I'm totally feeling it. I'm losing my mind. kids pretending to be high. Yeah.

I'm totally feeling it. I'm losing my mind. I think they were high, though. Oh, really? Yeah. Maybe they were high from something else, though, before they did the acid. Oh, because does it not kick in that fast? No.

I think you've got to wait a little while. Yeah. Depends on how long the Skytrain trip was, I guess. Sure. Skytrain can be pretty trippy. True words were never said, Amy. I mean, I take trips on it. Yeah. No, no, no, no.

It's fair enough, yeah. That should be their slogan for 2011. Skytrain could be pretty trippy. Trip out on the Skytrain. Born trippy. Yeah, trip balls. Oh, man. Oh, lovely.

Well, that does it for another year. balls. Oh, man. Oh, lovely. Well, that does it for another year. Well, no. We have one more before the year is out. Where we count down the ten greatest stars of 2010. Should we have lists?

Yeah, why not? A list? No, wait. That's too late. I was going to say a list-ness, but it's too late. Like a favorite things or something to wrap up the year. Yeah, I kind of like the idea of doing a countdown of the best and the worst. Beach bods. Yeah, who had the best beach bods? Hugh Jackman's at the top of my list.

Any takers? I haven't seen him at the beach this year. Oh, I saw him at local beach Great He was in the middle of fall He was wearing a classy jacket and pants combo Yeah just walking the dog Picking up waste

Yeah as you do But everybody out there Whatever Denomination Whatever stance you have on the holidays. Vegan, non-vegan. Exactly. Yeah.

Bootylicious. Otherwise. All the single ladies. Yeah, all the single ladies out there. I hope you have a nice holiday time. All the women who's independent. Yeah, throw your arms up at Dave. Girl, I didn't know you could get down like that

charlie how your angels get down like that what's christmas angels oh that was from uh boys on the side yeah christmas how your angels get down like that um and yeah angel gabriel i'm cutting you off you're trying to say something oh i was just gonna say like we said before, if you want to get in touch with the podcast... Did we not have a gift exchange? Oh! Oh! Do we? At the last second? Well, I have a gift for you that was given to me after doing a fundraiser.

Okay. Well, I mean, you were about to end the show, but we should say that we... Oh, yes. We did... The last two years, we've done gift exchanges. The first year, it was $20 to buy something ridiculous for the other person last year we made donations

in each other's names we tried to find the most ridiculous celebrity charity you donated to Ludacris Kids and the Gina Davis oh you were the Gina Davis to No, I donated to the Oh, you were the Geena Davis. Yeah, that's right. To the Geena Davis trying to get

roles. Women in film or something. No, chilled girls in film. That's right. That's right. And so this year we were like, oh, are we doing that again? And then I was like, I don't really feel like it. And you were like, I found something on my fridge

for you. Yeah. I'll find something for you. Yeah, It was sitting on top of my fridge. I'll find something for you. Yeah. So are we going to exchange right now? Yeah. Oh, okay. Well, mine comes courtesy.

I did a fundraiser for an organization called Megaphone. That's a magazine that the disadvantaged sell on the street for money for their own pocket. the disadvantaged sell on the street for money for their own pocket. And at the end of the fundraiser, a gentleman handed me this bag of candy. Bag of candy. That I am now passing on to you because I am not eating candy at the moment. Okay, on account of your cavities. Well, thank you, Graham. You're very welcome.

You've been sitting on it for over an hour. Oh, no, it's been tucked in. It's warm. Chris was here. He sat on it, over an hour Oh no, it's been tucked in It's warm Christmas here, he sat on it too It's ready to hatch Now, a few months ago I think maybe a year or so ago Actually, it might have been last summer

One of our guests, I don't know who Left a pair of sunglasses here They're ladies' sunglasses Ladies' sunglasses And I want you to have them Merry Christmas to me. I will wear them. And in addition, I also have a button from when you ran for mayor or whatever.

I want you to keep that for the next time I run for office. I am counting on your support. Look at you all short-haired and short-bearded. I know, right? Handsome time. Back when you were on TV. Yeah. And speaking of your short beard, your I know, right? Handsome time. Back when you were on TV. Yeah. And speaking of your short beard, your beard is long.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. This is. Bountiful, I like to call it. And you're painting paintings with them. Yes. And thank you to all the people who bid in the first round of the beard paintings. First round picks. Yeah.

No, it's very inspiring that people would do that. They're all above $100 now. Yeah. And actually at the time of this recording being released, the first four or five have all sold. Yes. At the time of the release. Yeah. They've all sold.

But there are a couple more that are up. There's a couple more up. there's a couple more up and I really like I say I'm just trying to raise as much money I can for Claire Boggan who's seeking cancer treatments outside of this country and

yeah so check out on eBay if you type in Beard Paintings plus Graham Clark that's where you'll find them and also on New Year's Eve if you're in Vancouver or anywhere near, myself, Dave Shumka, we will be on a... So many past guests.

Oh, it's going to be fantastic. It's going to be so good. A laugh gallery show. You can pick up your tickets at Neptune Records, and it's $20. It's such a great way to spend the New Year because it's so chill. No shitty, shitty business. You're not going to trip balls. Unless you want to, you know. No shitty, shitty. So chill. Yeah. You're not going to trip balls.

Yeah. Unless you want to. Unless you want to and then we're going to be cool about it. Yeah. And yeah, if you want to get in touch with the podcast, stop podcasting yourself at gmail.com or call us at 206-339-8328. And Abby, thanks for being our guest. Thanks, guys. Yeah.

Merry, merry holidays to you. Merry freaking Christmas, guys. Oh, and in addition, check out the blog on maximumfun.org. Yes, yes. Yeah. Merry holidays to you. Merry freaking Christmas, guys. Oh, and in addition, check out the blog on maximumfun.org. Yes, yes. Yeah, please do. Please do. It's lovely. Yeah. And the forums, too. The forums are fun. So many things to plug. Oh, it's crazy. Also,

listen to that Sunday Service podcast. Oh, my God. It's crazy. Let's do it. Thanks for everybody for listening. We'll see you with our year in review podcast. Best of 2010. Thanks for everybody for listening. We'll see you with our year in review podcast. Best of 2010. Thanks for giving us homework. Alright, thanks everybody for listening to

Stop Podcasting Yourself. Stop Podcasting Yourself. Thank you.