Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 189 - Charlie Demers

Episode Date: November 1, 2011

Comedian and writer Charlie Demers returns to talk parodies, fast food, and the worst wrestling gimmicks.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 189 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who is doing not even a little tiny thing for this Halloween, Mr. Dave Shumka. Uh, what? Am I doing not even a tiny thing? Are you giving away candy?

I'm gonna go get candy on the day after Halloween. Real cheap. Sure. That counts. That doesn't count candy on the day after Halloween for real cheap. Sure. That counts. That doesn't count. That's after Halloween. I know, but I have awareness of Halloween. Sure.

Well, you do. You promote Halloween awareness. That's why you're wearing that black and orange ribbon. Yeah. With the skull in the middle. There's nothing funny about halloween unawareness and uh for anybody who's brand new to the program you may not recognize that voice but he's one of our all-time favorite vlad drako you may know him as the impaler uh very funny man, comedian, sometimes actor even.

Really? I don't know. I act like an asshole. But one of our all-time favorite guests, Mr. Charlie Demers, is with us today. Thanks for having me, fellows. Happy Hello Scream. That was pretty Homer-esque. I apologize for being derivative. No, I appreciate it.

I didn't realize why you guys kept saying 189, and I thought we were just having a Wendy's conversation before the show started. Congratulations on number 189. It's the real milestone. You know when it's real. And it's real. Let's get to know us. Get to know us. So what's new and exciting, Charlie?

It's been a series of months since we've had you on. Yeah. I think my year is inversed since last time I was here, because last time I was here, I had nothing to do and was feeling really existentially bereft, and now I feel existentially bereft. And, um, uh, now I feel existentially be right. Um, uh, I'm working, I'm working right now on a,

um, a reality, a reality TV program, uh, where I am, uh, writing for the show. It's a Snooki based product.

Yes. Snooki spinoff. Uh, and, it's a Snooki-based product. Yes. Snooki spinoff. And it is not Snooki. And then the thing is, it was supposed to be a contract that was supposed to go from mid-July to the beginning of September. So I took work for the rest of fall, like a usual human amount of work. Sure.

But then the contract keeps getting extended, which is great. Yeah. But it just means I don't sit and I don't watch TV anymore. There's nothing. There's a lot. There's so many episodes of Frasier that I've only seen six times. Yeah. Well, congratulations. There's so many episodes of Frasier That I've only seen six times Yeah Well congratulations on all the work Well thanks

It is good, it's always good to work You're working men at work? No you're working for The Oprah Winfrey Network I'm not You are working directly under Oprah Winfrey You're her number two i am living my best life yeah number two uh but no if i if i were up in the overwind free organization as

i think we've discussed on a previous visit i would do something about dr oz's arm hair situation which is out of control. Why? Does he have really... He's a very handsome guy. Right. Yeah. With then this, like, arm hair that... I actually was emceeing for Moshe Kasher, who's been a previous guest, right?

Yeah, last week. He was on last week. And he has a... Has quite a bit of arm candy, as I call it. Arm cotton candy and uh he uh he's the only guy who even comes close to dr oz see i didn't don't even equate that in my head that dr oz is a hairy armed guy but i guess now that you mention it i don't know every time i think of dr oz i only think of his hair part and how, like, always on point to this.

I only think of his poop expertise. Does he talk a lot about poop? Yeah, that was his, like, claim to fame when he was a guest on Oprah. He'd talk about, let's talk about poop, maybe? Yeah, the shape it should be. Oh, what shape should it be? Turd-shaped. No, is that not the Mickey Mouse shape?

Like, Flintstone vitamins. No, I don't want to talk about this, but the letter C or the letter S. C.S. Lewis? Yeah. Should be shaped like a lion, a witch, or a wardrobe. Yeah, okay. So, I'm not working for Oprah directly, but I'm working for a production company that's making a show for the Oprah Network. Right.

And that's the new home of Rosie O'Donnell. It's the new hoe of Roe. Roes of Hoes. Is that the slogan? Roes and Roes of Hoes? Roes and Roes of Hoes and Hoes. But that doesn't make sense if Ro is short for Rosie. What is her show?

Does anybody here... Has anybody here seen anything? I haven't seen it, but I know that it is a... It's like a daytime version of a late night show. Does she still have the kush? I don't know if she has... You think kush is a marijuana term? That's what I was referring to.

She used to throw marijuana into the crowd. I'd be rosy, I don't know. You cutie patootie. Why is she Jamaican? Because isn't Cush... Cush is...

Is that not a Jamaican term? It seems Caribbean. I don't know. I think it's... Inflected. I just imagine it as like a white guy with dreadlocked. But he might have a Jamaican accent. Sure.

Yeah, it's possible. Is it? Rosie O'Donnell... Yeah, and does she still... She doesn't still talk about Tom Cruise does she I don't know he's still alive so it's possible that she thinks oh he's doing his own stunts on Mission Impossible 4

or whatever that seems to be a thing that every time I turn on the television there seems to be a story about that how he's doing his own stunts yeah so much so that yesterday I didn't even know that there was a plane crash in Vancouver but I knew that Mark Wahlberg had said that Tom Cruise's stunts didn't look like he did them himself. Oh, man.

I know, I gotta change my TV watching. He's snarky, Mark. I still got it. Yeah, if you were afraid that you lost it, you have officially landed where you need to be. See you guys later. So, working all the time. Yeah. And so, like, you're working, like, five days a week?

Like, you're, like, a worker. I would say the, for the last month or two, I've been working, usually six or seven, six or seven days a week. Gross. During the day and during the evening yeah it's been awful well no not awful because I mean

actually this is a true fact and we can should we shout him out the creative producer of the show is a fan of your podcast oh is that right? his name is Jordan what up Jordan? sup Jord

I'm not good with meeting people. No, Jord is a pretty good river dance. That would be a good nickname for somebody named Jordan. River Jordan. Oh, right. Yeah. River Jordan. Sure.

River dance. I came up with a nickname for Michael Jordan with his Hitler mustache from the Hanes commercial. You can call him Hair Jordan. Hair Jordan, not bad. But otherwise, yeah, Jordan's not full of nickname potential. But anyway, he is a fan of this program. Hot dog.

Why not? Welcome. Welcome back. Welcome, Jordan. Yeah. So you're standing around. You're in a writer's room. You're writing. You're using your upstairs. How close to the Larry Sanders show is it? Keeping in mind, I haven't ever seen it. You've never seen the Larry Sanders show?

Have you really not? It's on my to-do list. Oh, you should, thanks for not saying bucket list, first of all. Well, okay. I got the news from the doctor. first of all. Well, okay. I got the news from the doctor.

For a movie that I don't know anyone who saw, besides Kevin Fox, I don't know anyone who saw Bucket List. No, neither do I, but it has become... It has become just, oh, you know, my Bucket List. You know, all my sisterhood of traveling pants. We, in answer to your question, it is very much like the Larry Sanders show.

He does two accents. He does Jamaican. He does French. Uh, it's not much like the Larry Sanders show. What a relief. Um, but I should lend it to you. I have the whole series. No, I have it on Netflix.

It's on my, uh, thing, things to. It's in your house, ready to be viewed. It's so good. It's on Bucketflix. I saw somebody renting a movie out of one of those red box machines at the grocery store last night. And that's the first time I've ever seen that. I don't even know how they work. No, neither do I.

But watching it, it was really fascinating, because I guess you just scroll through the touchscreen and you can read. It's like being in a video store, but grosser and weirder. Yeah. It's right by the bathroom, but that's true. But how do you return it? There's just a slot

that you just... But how do they know it's you? Why wouldn't you just keep it? Maybe there's a scan code. Oh, you have to put your credit card in. So if you keep it, then they charge you $85 for Rango. Yeah, I wonder if that's still a thing that happened even in the last days of Blockbuster. That if you lose the video, even if it's a DVD now, would they charge you an exorbitant amount? Oh yeah, well what if you still had a VHS

copy of something past the last day that they carried VHS you couldn't return it because what would they do with it, right? You return it and then they sell it for two bucks Yeah You return it and it's not rewound so they get furious

We just threw out our machine. Yeah. There should be a similar thing to Be Kind Rewind about cleaning the DVD before you send it back to... Yeah, it's a natch. Don't scratch. Whatever. Yeah, don't be mean. Keep it clean.

Something. Oh, that's good. Because it feels like every time... Dave's not super impressed i'm trying to think of a better one now i can't do it whenever i like i go to the the video store and rent they feels like somebody's like buttered their toast with it like it's always there's just like grime on it and i'm like what do you between taking it out of the case and putting it in a dvd player where is the grime coming they use it as a coaster for a bit take it out of the case and putting it in a DVD player, where is the grime coming from? They use it as a coaster for a bit.

Take it out to the park with the dog, throw it around for half an hour. Yeah, the boxes, I think, are really gross, too. Like, just the boxes that contain the DVDs. Oh, like the rental case or whatever? Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's true. Yeah, it's like... Like the clear one.

Yeah, and like, just that's true. Yeah, it's like... Like the clear one. Yeah, and like just you can tell the... You can tell basically based on what movie you're renting. You're like, okay, well, if I'm renting Baraka, then clearly it's a... Somebody's rolled a joint on this case. Yeah. Oh, I thought you were going in a different... I thought it was going to be a on a onanistic self-pleasure. Yeah, but I couldn't think of...

What movie would you rent? If you're renting pornography, that's got to be the worst. Or even just anything with pretty ladies in it. Do they still rent pornography? They must. There's a store in my neighborhood that I've never been to. But do they just sell it, or do they rent it? No, you can still rent porn. Oh, that is

way weird. Yeah. Like, that is, to me, has always been weird. Yeah, totally. Gross! Gross to those guys. Do you think at the video stores, do they at the porno video stores do they do halloween stuff do they have the catcher dress up in a costume or or do they like are there like halloween

themed porno movies there's gotta be yeah edward penis hands i know that that's not a halloween strictly more of a christmas film more of a whimsical or of any time of year. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, I don't know. That's the other thing. When they make those parody things, that doesn't seem like that would be good for either people who like parody or people who like pornography. Yeah, the real Seinfeld or whatever. Or no.

What do they call it? Like, it has a name. It's like, this is not science-fouled. Yeah, yeah. And like, there was a Sopranos one called the Sopornos.

Yep. Yeah. I never saw it. And then there was recently But you're a completist. Why haven't you seen I am a completist, but there's a lot of sex

in just the regular Sopranos. They did a weird one that was a Simpsons one with real life people dressed up in the costume, like, costumes of them. And I saw, I've never seen it. Oh, in the costumes of them. And I saw... I've never seen it. Oh, like the one

where E.T. Oh, what? There was an E.T. one? Yeah. If you look it up on... This is Wiener Glow? No, it's a girl. E.T. becomes a girl and she's in Victorian England. It's German.

They're not allowed to edit the content of the movie. That's not part of the rules. Hey, it's fanfic. It's in Victorian Germany? No, it's Germans, but they're in Victorian England. What? I know because I was once tagged in a... I have a feeling this is leading to an excellent pun.

No, I wish. Oh, great. Set me up. Sure, make me look like a dink. The best I can think of is, like, you're a real Reese's piece of ass. Oh, E.T. stands for Euro Trash. Pretty good. Yeah.

Oh, E.T. stands for Euro Trash. Pretty good. Yeah. Anyway, I was tagged in a... Somebody hacked, like, a Twitter account. It was some, like, environmental organization or whatever that I wasn't even following or whatever, but it was, like, BP Oil Spill Awareness or something. And I got tagged.

And the weird thing was I I got tagged with a bunch of really famous people who were being spammed. So you felt pretty good. I was like, okay. Somebody needs for me and P. Diddy to see some link. And then I clicked the link and someone

had done this kind of techno remix with using footage from this et porn and it was super disturbing it was like one of the most disturbing things i've ever seen so i was like what is this and i kind of googled it and there someone had written an article about it uh on some blog that looked like crazy obscure porn and uh it's worth reading up, because it is really disturbing. Is it E.T.?

Like, I just... When you said it was disturbing, the implications of it, and E.T. being a woman, kind of... Like, popped into my head. Oh, it's guys having sex with E.T.! Yes! Yeah.

Well, and the grossest part is, whatever you do to E.T., Elliot can feel it. No, that is not an implication that's explored in the porn. Oh, man! Oh, but it's grotesque, because it's really just like

this woman in a green suit with an E.T. mask on. Like a button-up suit? No, like an E.T. it's like a three-piece suit yeah but being fucked by guys dressed like you know fagan and the artful dodger like it's really i thought they were german no they are german but they're dressed as british dandies there's just nothing in that that makes any sense. No, it's horrible.

Wow. It was like they wrote the script after they inherited a costume warehouse. Or they wrote it without knowing of the existence of the E.T. movie. Oh, yeah, this guy looks like an urchin. An urchin. Oh, wow. Wow. Where doth we go from there?

Yeah, sorry. It's weird. Last week I talked about being tagged accidentally on Twitter for like a blues magazine. Yeah. There's like this weekly blues magazine that comes out online. Blue Balls. Yeah. there's like this weekly blues magazine that comes out online and I'm always tagged as you know

they'll be like four blues musicians and then Graham Clark and then I'll click on it it'll be a series of my tweets in this magazine but I think somebody actually cleared it up somebody found out that there is a blues musician and expert

named Graham Clark with an E. And so they just think that that's... But he shortens it for Twitter. But you would think they would look at any of my tweets and go zero of them are blues related. We should just run a double check. But your tweets do

speak a certain visceral truth. A kind of mississippi delta realism that's true they didn't follow the 145 chord structure yeah well you guys make both excellent points yeah and my uh well and also my profile pic is of a black man with a guitar who Who seems to be blind, or at least having trouble finding something. Yeah, he's brushing his hair with a porcupine.

What's the, um... What was I gonna say? What does that mean when someone says, like, hey, the so-and-so bugle is out, and then you're in it? But it's just their, your tweet? Have you had that happen to you? Many times, yeah. So, hey, the so-and-so bugle is out and then you're in it. But it's just your tweet? Have you had that happen to you? Many times, yeah.

So yeah, it is. It's like a weird... I don't know what it is. Like this one is like the Blues Society newsletter. It means that some organization doesn't know how to use Twitter. But it's usually individuals.

Yeah, but they've just like, they've just taken your name and then like eight other people's names, lumped them together to... I don't know, do you get ad dollars or something for that? I think they're trying to get more traffic by mentioning famous people like Graham Clark, the blues guy. Sure, yeah. And P. Diddley, the other blues singer. Blind P. Diddley. the other blue singer blind P. Diddley

so yeah well Dave what's going on with you man oh you know the usual here's a thing that happened to me yesterday I was walking on my lunch break and I saw these two guys

that were dressed identically they were both wearing jeans and the same green button-up shirt. Huh. Green plaid. And they weren't dressed outrageously, but they caught my eye immediately because they were wearing the exact same outfit. Same shoes? No, but both running shoes.

Okay. The exact same outfit and not even similar shirts shirts, but like the same model of shirt. Huh. And one guy was like a foot taller than the other guy. And I was like, oh, this will be, I'll take a funny picture of these two because it caught my eye. And so I took out my phone and I followed them across the street and uh they went into a mcdonald's and so i followed them into the mcdonald's and i was like if i have my phone set to camera before i even walk in there it won't be suspicious it'll be like i'm just on my phone and so i uh took my phone out and i uh

got behind them in line at mcdonald's and i took their picture and one of them i feel like he noticed me and so i i pretended to not be taking a picture on my phone and then i was like oh it would be really suspicious if i just walked out of mcdonald's now so i didn't even want to go to mcdonald's but i waited in line and i ordered food like a a whole thing? I ordered the cheapest thing I could think of. And I wasn't that hungry, so I got a... You got a smile. They're free.

I got a zesty mango McMinney chicken sandwich. That can't be the cheapest thing on the menu. It's certainly the curry-tasting-est thing on the menu. Because all McDonald's becomes curry-feeling. Yeah. But it's so rare that you get that curry experience

and McDonald's started that high up on your body. It's a bad sign if you're like, oh, it's... McDonald's is doing high up on your body. It's a bad sign. If you're like, oh, it's... McDonald's is doing curry flavored now. Wow. I had a nightmare like two weeks ago that I had to, for some reason, like I think I was being pressured

by a group situation. I was trying to impress people into eating a McDonald's hamburger. And it felt like a nightmare. It felt like eating it in the dream was way worse than it was recalling it in real life. But I remember lifting up the bun and the patty was the size of a silver dollar. And the rest was all bun and they just slowly shrunk the meat and nobody really noticed that it was just mostly bun and condiments?

Because would you notice? I'm not sure you would. Yeah. So I had a nightmare about that. It was very vivid. And now I can't even smell McDonald's without kind of going back to that. Maybe other horrible things happened. I had a nightmare about pizza once when I was a kid and then didn't want to eat pizza for a while.

Yeah, because the pizza in the dream was really gross. And actually when I think about it, I get a little nauseous. Yeah, that's how I feel about this. Do you feel like your real life interaction with this mango chicken thing? I won't get it again. It had a lot of options. I'm not used to this many options in a $2 purchase. Oh, wow.

That's true. It was like, do you want it grilled or... That's the one where we draw grill marks on it before we microwave it. He's having a felt bed. Is this one grilled? Grilling the chicken.

Grilling. Tastes like the black licorice with the smelly markers oh it's jerk chicken i forgot to tell you uh uh i yeah it's been a while since i went to mcdonald's that's not true i like um i i get the mcdonald's is gross but it's also also delicious. You've got a bit more of an iron constitution, it seems, for that kind of thing. Yeah. I'm more of a Wendy's man.

Sure. Ever since they brought back my... You know when it's real. Yeah. Ever since they brought back my favorite burger, they actually made it permanent. The Dave... The Asiago ranch and bacon and chicken. Oh, it's so good.

Oh, it's such a good pile so good. It's such a blessing. Did you hear McDonald's is permanently bringing back the McRib? To me, why would you do a thing that every year seems to get you publicity for doing absolutely nothing and then just ruin that? Isn't that a thing? They bring it back every year and then people get falsely... Yeah, people get excited about it

and order too many and get sick. It really is just... I don't think I've ever eaten a McRib or if I have, it was 15, 20 years ago. But isn't it just barbecue sauce? Isn't that essentially the difference?

Oh, except that the burger is... Pork? It's pork, and it's shaped like ribs, but it has no bones in it. Anytime something is really... The smile on Dave's face is pretty priceless. It's like a kid on Christmas morning. It's because it contains no rib material. It's sort of like if they if they made uh it into a lucky charm like a red balloon

brown ribs green clovers i did not realize they were bringing it back uh permanently mm-hmm that doesn't i mean nothing is permanent. Oh, that's true. Possessions are fleeting. No, McRibs, stay with you. Yeah, that's true. Now, on the topic of taking photos, I was just, while I was waiting, Dave picked me up to come to the podcast. I was taking photos of two hoodlums in my neighborhood because they were just hanging out. And there's nobody in our neighborhood that hangs out.'s all houses houses with families in it so there's no kids with hoodies hanging out and these two guys looked like joe pesci and daniel stern yeah they were sopping wet one guy had an iron on his face. No, it was a McRib.

It was a mark in the shape of a rib. But yeah, I saw them. They were hanging out. And the way that they were kind of wandering around the neighborhood, I'm like, these guys are, at the very least, they're doing something crazy with fireworks. And at the very most, they're looking for an empty house to steal something out of so that they can buy drugs so i took a photo on my phone the same way and they totally saw me taking the photo and i had to pretend like i was texting but luckily you pulled up because i felt like they saw me saw me faking to text and were gonna come over and beat me up so wow it worked out really well in my favor. They really should make a phone, a lens on a camera on a phone that's like angled. So, you look like you're actually texting, but you can hold the phone at the top.

It's like the camera's at the top. It's called the Pornographer's Dream. Not everyone is taking photos of people on their cell phones for such upstanding reasons. Upstanding upskirts. Yeah. .com. Yeah. I personally think it should be really, I think it should be made more obvious when someone is taking a photo with their phone.

They actually made it mandatory that it had to make a... Kind of sound? Yeah, it had to make a robot noise. Yeah. Did you see that Michael Winslow video with him doing Led Zeppelin? Yes, a thousand people sent it to me. I don't like Michael Winslow. But you love Led Zeppelin.

And also, didn't seem that impressive. Oh, it was pretty impressive. It was just him doing it with his voice. Got a whole lot of love. What does he do now? Does he just do stand-up? Yeah. He just goes around the...

Comes around. The countryside. Playing in the, you know, Memphis blues kind of places. Memphis blues. playing in the, you know, Memphis Blues kind of places. He just covers a famous blues song with no guitar. He gets mentioned on Twitter under the blues. Does he? I think he must have. There must be like a joke, Michael Winslow. Porn?

Oh, Twitter that's just all sound effects? Yeah. I feel like someone has even sent that to me. Just all sound effects? Yeah. Oh! I feel like someone has even sent that to me. My favorite one recently was a Breaking Bad-related one with the...

Your favorite fake Twitter? Yeah, fake Twitter with the Uncle Tio who could only talk with... So it's just ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, because he can only talk using a bell. So it's ding, ding, ding, angry snorting ding ding ding pretty great pretty great use of twitter like squirrel the squirrel one did you ever follow that uh no it's just squirrel jump jump jump sniff sniff scratch scratch scratch like it's just all follow for a day unfollow or the big ben one which every hour on the hour does like that's right like at three o'clock it'll tweet bong bong bong but who's updating that well i guess you're just cutting and pasting after the first 24 hours

after the first 12 even sure right you can do the and 12. We'll be back in 12 and 12. I wonder how many characters is bong 12 times. We'll never know. 48? But with spaces. Oh, sure. And exclamation points, probably. Plenty of room.

Solved. Solved that. Oh, lordy. So that's what's been going on with me taking covert pictures of and now that i think back it might have been a halloween thing that they were dressed yeah sure they might have been like what costume is that green plaid persian twins they were persian persian twins one was much taller than the other Like Twins the Movie Oh Twins the Movie maybe Yeah sure I'd buy that I'd rent it

Graham what's up with you? Hiya I uh A couple things First this is This is something I realized Yesterday I

Dave knows And maybe you know I've always been a big fan of the uh pro wrestling i don't pay attention to it now but certainly the pro wrestling of my youth yep holds like a special place in my heart so i watched the you're brett the hitman heart correct my heart foundation i am jim the anvil something night heart um i uh was watching the Nightheart I was watching the He was in the Heart Foundation? Yeah

Because his last name had heart in it? Yeah, and there was Jimmy the Mouth of South Heart Brett the Hitman Heart And Jim the Anvil Nightheart That's cleverer than Take off your pants and change But I was watching the WWE Vintage Collection where they show old matches from the

early 90s the late 80s or whatever and there was a character i completely forgot existed called the mountie uh and he was like it was he was in full mountie regalia. And he would come out, and his shtick was... It was a night shtick. Very close. His shtick was he would wrestle his opponent, and then when the opponent was down, he would taser them. What? Yeah.

And this is, like, way before the Mounties ever got into... Killing people with tasers. Yeah, getting into the taserology. But that was... I was like, what other futures did wrestling predict? But it was crazy, because I forgot about that character, and then I was watching the match, and he beat the guy,

and then he brought out a taser and tased the guy once he was down on the ground. Isn't that crazy? Who are the dumbest wrestling characters you can remember? Well, there was one called Repo Man. He was also on yesterday. What was his shtick? He repossessed people's cars.

That literally was his shtick. He came out with a thing that you would tie around somebody's bumper to connect it to a tow truck. That was his shtick. Did he do it to the person, though? No, he just, it was like his repo was spelled out in tire treads on his jacket. And he had tire treads all over him as if he had been run over by a car. Because there were some great ones. There was like, Andre the Giant was a giant.

Yeah, and named Andre. Well, there was a guy called IRS. Yeah, and named Andre. Well, there was a guy called IRS. Yeah, Erwin R. Scheister. Yeah, and he worked for the IRS, and he really cared that you paid your taxes. Yeah, he wore suspenders and a dress shirt and a tie with no sleeves. No sleeves. Who was the guy who gave haircuts and he had a big... Oh, that's right, with a beefcake.

That was his thing. Once somebody passed out, he would give the guy yeah two bits uh but uh and then we i was talking with somebody this week who had never heard of uh ravishing rick rude and he had the best i know i've talked about it on the podcast before his thing after a match what he would do he would make out with a chick he would find a woman in the audience and bring her into the ring and then smooch her and she would pass out yeah he was so good at making out what was the what about the pimp one in the 90s doink the clown no there was a guy and he had a whole train i know who you're talking about yeah but i don't remember his name but yeah he was i remember one time he uh

there was some british wrestler and he would like the bulldog baby boy no i don't remember his name, but yeah, he was a pimp. I remember one time he, uh, there was some British wrestler and he would like... The Bulldog. Baby Boy Smith. No, I don't think it was a famous one. The Dynamite Kid? No, it was Ringo Stark. The street urchin. Ringo, you'll see, Stark.

Yeah. And so he, uh, he said to the guy, like, you can either fight me or you can have sex with all my prostitutes. And then the guy was like, well, I hate you, but I'm not gay, so I'm gonna have sex with your prostitutes. And then the

pimp went, I guess Archie Bunker was right. England ain't nothing but an island full of fags. What? And then so it was like this double reversal of like, well, I'm not gay, so I'm going to have sex with these girls. Oh, yeah? You mean what a gay would do?

And then they fought. It was so weird. I remember there was one thing where, did I tell, I don't know, I've talked about all of this before, but there was a couple that got married in wrestling and then they had their honeymoon night

in the ring and then they got disrupted and they were shocked like there was a bed in the ring what how far did it go

well they got under the covers they were doing something and they had to fight the ring bearer Rick the model martel i remember had a dumb one he was a model yeah and he had his own perfume he would spray it in the face of his opponents it was called arrogance and uh who did the who would read poems and throw frisbees into the crowd? T.S. Eliot.

I don't remember. The Hollow Man? No. Yeah, he was the invisible wrestler. Oh, that's a good... Oh, an invisible wrestler? Yeah, like the guys always are fighting him, but they don't know where he is. And you wouldn't have to hire a wrestler. He's just there you have one guy kind of going oh man i think that's something yeah i think we just stumbled on something the the jabroni that

he fights gets two paychecks yeah are there still jabronis though because now it's always star versus stars i don't watch it anymore uh The one conversation I was having with somebody, I was trying to come up with a character, my own wrestling character, and I thought there's never been a wrestler that's a silent movie character where he comes out and he looks dressed like a silent movie guy. His makeup is all white. Yeah, white and black. And he comes out with very heavy eye makeup. But all his finishing move is

very silly. Like he flops on top of somebody. I like it. It's not bad, right? He canes them. The slapstick something. Did you hear... Slapstick Gibb. There you go. Speaking of Brutus the Barber Beefcake, did you hear about Hulk Hogan's wife?

Oh yeah. How she wrote a book. The Hogan's family? Hogan family.ogan's wife. Oh, yeah. She wrote a book. The Hogan's family? Hogan family. Valerie's family. Claiming that Hulk Hogan and Brutus the Barber Beefcake had an affair. Yeah, I believe that. I believe that just a never-ending whatever of homoerotic everything is going on in that world. Yeah.

Although they don't seem like a great pair because he's bald. But he has that long hair on the sides that always needs trimming. But he doesn't get haircuts on that. His mustache always needs trimming. That's a high-maintenance mustache. Hogan's bald?

He's a real American. Hack saw Jim Duggan always seem like the dumbest wrestler when I was a kid. Like, he just had a two-by-two. It's true. That was his whole stage. He just kind of walked around. And he walked like a skinhead. Yeah, there were some that had...

That's true. Oh, so did the Bushwhackers. They were Australians. They were Australian homeless people, weren't they? Well, there was... What? Well, they lived in the bush. They didn't have houses.

I thought that was their stick. And they were like, poor bushwhackers. There was like, Australia was a big part of everyone's culture. Sure. Yeah. It's coming back around. There's still Koala Springs. Did you know that? Really?

Yeah. Because I watched. Delicious. There's still Koala Springs. Did you know that? Really? Yeah. Because I watched.

Delicious. I went to a Tip Mouse show last late spring. The Ian Boothby and them, they do that at the improv center. It was very funny. And it was a very funny scene, an improv scene with them and Toby Burner and Chris Cusone. And they did a thing about they worked at a Koala Springs factory and nobody knew if they still existed. Like them in the factory? Yeah, they were in the factory and they were like, do we still exist? And then they're like, I don't know, because one of them used to have a job at Clearly Canadian.

But I was in Solly's Bagels like maybe a month or two ago and they had Koala Springs in there. bagels like uh maybe a month or two ago i had koala springs in there it's one of those things like if you see it you almost feel compelled to buy it just because you're like i gotta take this trip yeah but also just seems strange that like of all the places that it would be sollies like yeah if it's gonna exist it'll exist in a jewish del. You'd think they would carry, like, a New York seltzer. Yeah, or like that celery pop, which is another shout-out to Jordan, the creative producer of the show. Did he invent celery pop? No, he just loves that

celery pop. What's that? It's like a deli soda. And it tastes like celery? Yeah, it's celery... Cel-ray, it's called. Huh, never heard of it. Yeah, me neither. I've never had it. Have you... I see a lot of particularly in communities that have a lot of Asian

people, a lot of those aloe drinks. Oh yeah. Have you had it? That are just bright green and I imagine coat your throat. I had the exact opposite. Oh, you didn't like it? No, I had a coconut drink that featured aloe and I took one, and it felt like I had

drank aloe that you put on your hands. Yeah, like hand cream. Oh, no. Good aloe tastes like lychee, and actually, aloe juice mixes really well. You couldn't have picked a thing that I would know less what it tastes like than lychee. Is it a Street Fighter character? It tastes like Raiju. It tastes like Chun-Li. It's like saying it tastes like a meteorite. Street Fighter character? Tastes like Ryu. Tastes like Chun-Li.

It's like saying it tastes like a meteorite. I don't know what that tastes like. But it tastes like lychee, and actually, it goes really well with Disaronno. Like Amaretto, Amaretto liqueur, and aloe vera. It goes really well with lanolin. No, but I'm trying to get it started as a... Because our friends made this drink, and their names are Kevin and Holly, and they call it a Holven. Well, that's never going to fly.

Nope. But they are a white Chinese couple, as are Cara and I. And I said, but she's Italian, he's Chinese. She's all that. Disaronno is Italian, Aloe is Chinese, so I think you call it a Marco Polo. Oh, that's pretty good. Pretty good name, right? Yeah. Put a little bit of pasta water in there. Yeah, it's pasta water.

Disaronno. Aloe vera. Am I wrong? Am I wrong in saying that Disaronno ads are the silliest of all liquor ads? I can't think of any. Next to Bailey's. Bailey's where people drink Bailey's straight. Yeah, but DiSerono, nobody...

Or as Brent Butt has pointed out also, the Captain Morgan's ads have become essentially inscrutable. Like, they make no sense at all. That's true. But it's like, the DiSerono... Nobody in the history of DiSerono has ever gone to a bar and ordered

a DiSerono and ice. No. So DiSerono has ever gone to a bar and ordered a DiSerono and ice. No. So, but they're trying to make that a thing. Like, yeah, you know when you go to a bar and you order shots of DiSerono? Then you go into diabetic shock. The weirdest thing on... Make sure you specify what kind of amaretto. Yeah.

Don't just take what they have, which is the only... DiSerono, the only kind that is made. But the weird thing about a DiTorono bottle is that it says on the label in super futuristic font, it says

made since 1525 or something like that. What do you mean futuristic font? Like Robocop font? It's like the font of like in the 80s everything that was supposed to be futuristic. Okay.

Transformers. So yeah. So it's like RoboCop. Made since 1525. You should go the opposite. It should be in something cursive. Right.

Yeah. 1525. A-A-D. Yeah. After. After whatever A, D. After, after whatever D stands for. What does A, D stand for again? Anno Domini.

Oh, in the year of our lord. Wow. Is there an atheist calendar? Is there a Di Serono calendar that tells you every month what the best mix? DeSorono in ice. DeSorono in a glass.

DeSorono through a straw. I've had it once. What are the examples of things that you drop a shot into something else and then you have to chug it? Boilermaker. There's a Dr. Pepper where you drop a shot into something else and you have to chug it. Oh, a Boilermaker. Yeah, there's a Dr. Pepper where you

drop a shot of Amaretto into a beer and it tastes like Dr. Pepper. That sounds delicious. Why don't they make that the ad campaign? A thing that actually people would want to order. Also, this is the... But you can't have more than one because that's a crazy thing to do. You have to chug something. Yeah, I'm always...

It's always weird when you have to... And then we had 10 Irish Carpons what are those? I don't know. I'm just bragging. The other thing in those Di Serono commercials that is my favorite because every time you go to the bar every bottle has a little you know spout in it that they, whatever you call that Makes it easy to pour But in the DeSorono commercials Spout is the word you're looking for The guy's always gotta un-lid

It's still got its square top And he's gotta spin it off No one ever orders this It's so iconic Yeah, our crazy square lid That was Michael Winslow So iconic. Yeah. Yeah. Our crazy square lid. That was Michael Winslow. A whole lot of love.

As crazy as you think the ads are for Disarono. Disarono. Pardon me. I thought Disarono. Yeah. Disarono. That's where I get all of my home repair equipment is at the serona oh come on something for your canadian listeners does rona even exist anymore it does it doesn't in the canada it's the koala springs of canada it's revy that doesn't exist anymore yeah oh

yeah i'd forgotten about revy uh what are they called in the States? Just Home Depot. Yeah, they have a Lowe's, they have a Home Depot. They still have a, what do you call it? There's two weird Canadian chains Is Beaver Lumber a thing still? Beaver Lumber still exists, and also Totem? You want to call it? It was a place

that you could buy lumber. Are still existing in small towns, but have been run out of the big cities by your Home Depots, etc. I remember beaver lumber. It was like a big thing. Yeah. It was like you'd be driving through suburban Burnaby or whatever.

There'd be a big beaver lumber. It was never a big thing. Every Christmas we would go to beaver lumber. Buy a beaver set at free. It was big enough to house a bunch of lumber. But it wasn't culturally a touchstone. Yeah, it sure wasn't.

Well, I grew up in a handy neighborhood. Sure. We were always jerry-rigging things. But my point with the DeSorono ads being crazy is every ad is crazy i know but every alcohol ad just every ad but there's a chance there are hamsters driving kias that one is just nonsense it's crazy the like who are you trying to sell to the hip-hop rickard gear Richard Gere? The hip-hop hamsters for Kia. It's an odd situation.

Oh, man. Richard Gere. Yikes-a-daisy. We've had a lot of fun. Should we move on to handle some business? Yes, please. I'm going back in time. Yay!

Well, that isn't our usual business theme song. That's our time travel theme song. Why did we play that, Dave? Could it be that this week's sponsor of the show is the Time Traveler's Pocket Guide by sikelski there you go it is a uh well you have it in your hand right now i am i we uh dave and i were lucky enough to get two copies sent to us and uh it's the great thing about it is it's called the time traveler's pocket guide it is actually pocket size this will fit in the back pocket of most jeans. It's a little bit wide for the back pocket. Dave, the jeans I wear, I wear Oshkosh Bagosh adult collection. You slip it down the front.

Yeah, your front pocket there. The Time Traveler's Pocket Guide contains everything you need to know before you get in your time machine. Yes. It contains vital information such as the time traveler's secret handshake and tips on making out with celebrities before they're famous this is the these are two things that like first of all i don't want to say what the the handshake is because it's one of those things it's like you want to find out get the book uh but there's a there's it covers some of the you know the typical time traveling uhveling debates, killing baby Hitler.

Where does it weigh in on killing baby Hitler? It says leave him alone. He's a baby. He's just a baby Hitler. But it has things, eventualities. What do you do when you run into yourself? What happens if you spill information about the future? Yeah, what happens if you spill milk?

Should you cry over it? Sure. There's also a great collection of cutouts that you can have. There's a cutout tattoo that's a heart that says robots on it, so that you fit in in the future. There's also a UPS code you can put on your body, because they're going to have those in the future. And then they've got a series of mutton chops, in case you go to the past, and you need mutton chops, you can cut them out.

They thought of everything. I like the child types, like what type of child will most enjoy various eras. Oh, yeah. And the child type goody-goody suck-up has an enjoyment level of 100% for all eras.

For all eras. And the quotes from child are just, on the prehistoric era, era, erica. What prehistoric era? Prehistoric erica.ca.

On the prehistoric era. I love it so. Oh, Prehistoric Erika. Prehistoric Erika.ca. On the prehistoric era. I love it so much. It's very educational and fun. Thank you for taking me here. On ancient Egypt. I love it so much. It's very educational and fun. Thank you for taking me here.

Pretty good. It's very funny. It's a fun book. Yeah. It's 10 of your Earth dollars. It's very funny. It's a fun book. Yeah.

It's 10 of your Earth dollars. And if you visit timetravelbureau.com forward slash spy, backslashes don't exist outside of Microsoft DOS. Okay, guys? Yeah, yeah. Well, stop saying backslash. Yeah. timetravelbureau.com slash spy. Stop podcasting yourself.

That's right. It's a special page set up for you, the Stop Podcasting Yourself listener. You go there to buy the Time Travelers Pocket Guide. You get a discount, and there's information on where there will be live book events, and you can get goodies.

And if you're somebody, if you know somebody who loves any of the time travel films, you're Terminators, you're Back to the Futures, you your Time Cops. Your hot tub time machines. Your hot tub time machines. This is a great, I'm going to say, I know it's a little early for this,

great stocking stuffer. Oh, if it's not pocket-sized, it's absolutely stocking-sized. Absolutely. Well, should we move on? Look at this clever inscription. Go on. To you guys.

Is Kay a she or he? A she. She? Yeah, she. I got that sense. Yeah, right? Feels right. Feels right.

She has written, her inscription to you is, Overheard in time. Podcasting. That'll never catch on. Circa 2002. See? That's a clever inscription. How right they were.

Yeah. Let's move on to Overheard. Overheard. Overheard's a long-lasting segment. Like a really effective deodorant. Long-lasting. Or like a... Like Celebrity Death Pool.

That was done within moments. Episode three, yeah. I think we felt... I think mostly we felt bad about it. Then it got moved to Celebrity Odds, and I did a song for it. Let's play that song. Celebrity, celebrity odds. You were the first person to make a theme song that didn't just have the words from the title of the segment.

Although you just repeated the word celebrity twice. Yeah, but you really sang it. You really Joe Cockered the shit out of it. Well, but then I was outdone by Connor Haller with the stunt casting. Yeah, we have a lot of themes. He went all post-modern. It was like sun-raw, experimental 70s jazz. If anyone wants to hear all of our segment themes, we don't do most of our segments anymore.

It became just the chat shack. We have the talk. But we have all of our segment themes. It became just the chat shack Yeah With a talk But we have all of our segment themes There's a thread on the Maximum Fun Boards Yeah I posted a link to all of our themes Couldn't you make money by having them as ringtones? Yeah, we could sell them as ringtones

Hey, come on, we didn't get in this for the money But I still think you should sell an overheard app Well, we're working on it We're not working on it. Yeah. It seems like a thing. But maximum... Always remember...

Would it be a button that makes fart noises? Yeah. Maximum fun boarding is better than water boarding. Water boarding? Yeah. That's where I was going. Even boogie boarding. It's better than boarding school.

Yeah. So overheards. We're here in the midst of it. We usually start with the guest. Charlie claims he doesn't have one. No, you know what? Like, I literally, and I had, this is how busy I am. I had forgotten that this was a thing that I had to bring to the table.

Yeah, sure. I understand. I mean, I have. We'll start with Dave. Maybe something. We'll see if you have one by the end of the segment. Okay. How about that?

Yeah. Ooh. Can it be one of your overheards that I've just heard? Okay, let's start with me. Let's start dave this week kind of a week one my 189 my mom my 189 uh you know that it's real terrible i like wendy's it's my favorite oh no wendy's is good in terms of uh what category that it exists is look it's all good it's not good date food it's is good in terms of what category that it exists in. Look, it's all good. It's not good date food.

It's eating good in the neighborhood. Who's that? That's a thing you just made up. Spider-Man. Yeah, Willie's Hamburgers. Willie's. That's a thing from Calgary. Willie's Hamburgers.

We used to have Wally's on Kingsway. Yep, there's Wally's. We had Willie's with a guy with a... Like a dirty old man, basically. He would just barf from You Can't Do That on Television. He would serve food out of an open trench coat. Who do you think's in the burgers? That's not a bad barf.

Remember he had a booger rag hanging from the... He died a few years ago, and it was a big deal. Les Unles? What's that? He had a state funeral. He had a booger rag hanging from the... He died a few years ago and it was a big deal. He had a state funeral. I don't know. Okay, my overheard is thus. It's weak. I was in a liquor store. A store where they sell liquor.

And there was two customers in there, me and another guy. And one guy behind the counter, very empty store, and then a second employee, they had these tubs set up

with ice in them and drinks that were on ice. Like big, big buckets that come up to your waist. A modern barrel. Oh, sure. And they were filled with ice and drinks. And one guy came out of the back, an employee came out of the back of the store,

carrying this big bag of ice that he was about to pour into another bucket here. And he just said, all right, everyone, watch your ears. And then he poured the ice in. It wasn't loud at all. The dumbest warning ever. He probably had to do that. It's like a government regulation.

Or there had been one complaint from someone who had their hearing aid turned up. No, it's from an instructional video called Beers and Ears. Cheers! Cheers to Beers and Ears. A do and don't guide to the

modern liquor store. They actually got the Steers and Queers guy from Full Metal Jacket to narrate it. Oh, yikes and daisy. My Overheard comes courtesy of a store. I think it's a North American wide chain winners.

It's Canadian. Oh, is it just Canadian? Yeah. Okay. I don't know how to describe it. Is there an equivalent? I think it's like a TJ Maxx or something. It's like basically overstocked from other stores.

Yeah. Leftovers from other stores. basically overstocked from other stores yeah leftovers from other stores and uh it's it is when it comes to security in that store the loosiest of goosiest like it's just things have been repackaged by what kind of consumers what store is this winners winners oh gotcha yeah uh sorry i was trying to think of an overheard but uh this was in winters i was buying myself some white plain white tees that album by that band uh wasn't there a band called the plain white there still is i think oh no i think they broke up because of their dumb name but i was buying some plain white t-shirts so i was very close to where the uh change room was and i could hear two girls laughing hysterically in the change room was, and I could hear two girls laughing hysterically in the

change room. Whatever they were doing in there, funniest thing ever. And then I heard the one girl say, Ugh, you're not supposed to try those on! Don't know what. But I'm imagining it was underwear. Pants.

You're not supposed to try this on Oh it's too big This does not feel absorbent Poise pads Charlie do you have one yet? Should we It's kind of mean And I'll have to be

You're the queen of mean I'll have to be I'm right now wearing a jacket made of 101 Dalmatians. Who was the Queen of Mean? Wasn't it... Imelda Marcos? Victoria... I can't remember.

Who had all the shoes? That was Imelda Marcos. That was Imelda Marcos. No, it was the one that ran the hotel. Yeah, Hotel McGee. Oh, and who didn't want to pay... Leona Hemsley. Leona Hemsley.

Queen of Mean. And the Queen of Nice. Marianne from Gilligan's Island. Rosie O'Donnell claimed to be the Queen of Nice when she had her daytime show. Queen of Nice. Couch ball. Cuties patooties. And remember the guy, the, uh, Rosie, who played the, he was like her Paul Schaefer,

but brought nothing to the table. Does Ellen still have the black DJ guy? Yes. He was British. Is he British? I forget. Speaking of sidekicks, Kevin Eubanks recently came through town. Kevin Eubanks.

Former Tonight Show band leader. Yeah. Doc Severinsen. Do you think he got Doc severance crazy that wynton marsalis was on the tonight show yeah briefly like how mental is that what really yeah as what like uh the band leader yeah he was the kevin He was the original Kevin Eubanks. Oh, wow. But it was like, hey, demeaning black role for one of the premier jazz geniuses. He's the son, isn't he? Weren't they brothers? I mean, they were brothers. Anyway, I think he gave the commencement address at my brother's college graduation.

Really? Wynton Marsalis. My mother was there, and the only piece of advice she remembered was always bring your horn. Always empty your spit valve of life. These are metaphors. Can you imagine if Kevin Eubanks gave a... Oh, man. It'd just be...

Yeah. And then he just plays like a little... It's insane that you'd ever quit a job like that. Really? It's insane that you would stay at a job where you had to laugh at Jay Leno's jokes. It's tough to be a working musician and to have a job every night. But can you imagine having to... Like, that is literally one half of your job description,

is to laugh at Jay Leno's jokes? Uproariously. Yeah. Like, you would contemplate... They're good jokes. It's easy. They're good jokes. Well delivered.

The Roots being Jimmy Fallon's band is semi-analogous to Wynton Marsalis being on Jay Leno. That's true. How do you feel when the band on a late night show, because they usually just play instrumental covers. Are better than the hearts. And then one of them sings. One of them sings. It can be good. I don't like it so much.

You don't like it when they sing the lyrics to the cover? Yeah. Oh. I don't know. You know what? Late night, anything goes. Send it packing. I do not care.

What about the Klee tones? Oh, sure. It's true. I haven't watched any late night. Yeah. I watched Conan for the first, you know, month or two when he was back. You know what I'm doing when the late night's on? Sleeping.

Sleeping. Well, I'm not, actually. I'm trying to sleep. Desperately. actually. I'm trying to sleep. Um, but, uh, so I have to be careful with this, um, but, uh, let me just say that there

I know a guy, and he is a sexy chef, and a lady has fallen in love with him. This is my overheard. Okay, alright. She wrote on his Facebook wall, um, uh, that her, that he had rebirthed her stomach with butterflies.

Wow! Rocco Dispirito. Man, that's a real fancy way to put it. Wow. You know who I bet gets a lot of love letters like that? The guy, not Gordon Ramsay, but the other guy that's like the international chef. Oh, Jamie Oliver? Nope.

Jamie Kennedy? Son of the Mask? The guy, he's also a novelist. He's written a bunch of books. Anthony Bourdain? Anthony Bourdain. I bet he gets a lot of... Yeah.

He's an author. He doesn't write novels. No, he wrote a novel about... A whodunit? It is. It's a whodunit, but it's also involved in the chef world. Wow. For real.

Who burnt it? Who burnt it? The, yeah, it's... Who overdone it? Pretty good. All right. Who overdone it? Oh, I like it.

It's rare that a woman has to make a gesture like that yeah that's a great gesture too i well how sexy is this chef pretty sexy pretty sexy let's say does he does he cook wearing a cut off t-shirt yeah does he grate cheese on his abs yes both yeses well because he should be shut down if he's grating cheese on his abs that Yes, both yeses. Well, because he should be shut down if he's grating cheese on his abs. That's a health complaint. Because the cheese is falling into his genitals. I, um,

I had some Triscuits and Cheddar. Sure. During the break. Classic Koala Springs era treat. Classic after school snack. But it's an ideal because it's totally bowel movement neutral. Like Triscuits.

Triscuits would get you going. Sure. Cheddar's going to hold you back a little. It's a great snack. Why are we talking about that? There's like every part of it. There's no part of it that's not great. Oh yeah, I like the sweetness savory,

I like the bowel movement forward, and bowel movement back. You take two steps forward, two steps back, we come together. Because opposite's a trap. Sure, absolutely. My favorite line in that song is I hate cigarettes, I love to smoke!

Is that a Paul Abdul song where she sings with an animated does the cat sing uh yeah yeah he did not sing is it pibo bryson who's the voice of the cat dj scat cat is that mc scat cat oh sorry dj scat cat is his brother the dj. Who did the voice of MC Scatcat? I thought he was just... I think Peebo Bryson is as good a guess as Jenny. But there was a while when Peebo Bryson was just the voice of Disney. Like, every Disney hit.

Yeah, he played Sebastian the Crab. No, but, like, he did the main voice in The Aladdin. The singing voice. The singing voice. Yeah, yeah. Well, not even in the movie. Just in the single. But the Aladdin guy, wasn't he played by the guy that was also on Full House?

It was DJ's boyfriend. Sure. The singing voice, though. What's he doing now, you think? Joey Gladstone. You think any of that Aladdin money is still kicking around? Yes. And it's good for him.

I don't think he got back end on that. He got his one wish. He probably got a he got back end on that he got his one wish he probably got a bit of back end from that though hey guys from Princess Jasmine handsome Aladdin

has a plan to fuck a shit about Jasmine if he can in addition to overheards that have been us

we also get written in ones from you yeah if you want to be one of the people who send in overheards, you can send them to stoppodcastingyourself at gmail.com

like these people did. There's a couple of really... Guys, there's a couple of really, really good ones that I... I can make up for ours. This one is the first one. Gotta steal to eat, gotta eat to live,

tell you all about it when I got the time. Yeah. What is that from? Aladdin. Aladdin. And then there's A Whole New World, but I couldn't tell you another song from that one. Oh, you never had a friend like me.

Prince Ali, fabulous he, Ali Ababa. You ain't never had a friend like me. Is that the genie? Yeah. And I can show you the world. I can show you the world. No, it's worse. Shining, shimmering, splendid.

Tell me, princess, now when did you last let your heart decide? Up where they walk, up where they run, up where they stay all day. That was Peebo Bryson. Yeah. I think they rhymed it with Peebo Bryson. Up where they run, up where they do duets with Bryson, comma pebo oh lordy all right wish i could be part of your bryson what was the one from uh beauty and the beast oh right beauty and the beast tale as old as time oh and angelolda Angelolda Angela Lansbury

Angelode Lansbury Singing as a teapot Alright A bygone Erica That won the Oscar didn't it Yeah they had a good run Yeah I feel like Disney is not a thing

That it was anymore No it's all about. I feel like Disney's not a thing that it was anymore. No, it's all about Pixar now. Like when I was a kid, Disney was it. Like it was a big thing. And then they'll come back. I think maybe I was a kid during a Disney renaissance. They'll come back. There'll be another renaissance.

It really was like the early 90s. They sort of came into their own literally. What? All right. Overhearts from listeners. This first one comes from Curtis T. in Waterloo, Ontario. Last week, I was waiting in line to get into a bar when a cab pulled up and three really big guys started to climb out of it. up and three really big guys started to climb out of it.

One of the guys slipped while climbing out of the cab and fell on the pavement, so the second guy started laughing at him. The third guy jumped to his friend's defense with a, hey man, knock it off. Maybe he slipped on some ice. The laughing guy then responded with, you think he slipped

on ice in July? Tagline to it, there was no ice anywhere, and this happened in July. Tagline to it, there was no ice anywhere, and this happened in October. It snowed in New York today, apparently. Oh, speaking of things that happened today. Celebrity birthdays? Oh, I keep forgetting to do

celebrity birthdays week after week. Probably because there's no theme song. Celebrity, celebrity births. That's pretty good. We're recording this on October 29th. Big happy birthday to Richard Dreyfuss. He's 64 today. Hey, Jaws. Do you know Richard Dreyfuss?

This is his little moment. Or this is like a big Canadian content moment in the history of Hollywood film. Richard Dreyfuss felt so skittish and nervous about his performance in The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz that he thought his career was going to be over. So he quickly said yes to the role in Jaws. Because he thought he would not be offered anymore. Did you also watch that documentary about the making of Jaws? No.

Oh. I literally just watched one this week. And was that in there? Yes. Yeah. Wow. So that's our little Canadian contribution. I watched the documentary about the making of The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz.

Yeah. Short. Happy birthday to Richard Dreyfuss. Happy birthday to Dan Castellaneta, the voice of The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz. Yeah. It's short. Happy birthday to Richard Dreyfuss. Happy birthday to Dan Castellaneta, the voice of Homer Simpson. He's 52 today. And the answer to our trivia question, in 1999, which actress started her own music company

called Roastabout Studios? Ooh. Winona Ryder. Winona Ryder. Turns 40 today. I was going to say Drew Barrymore so it's the same era this second

overheard comes from Ryan D. in Houston, Texas I'm actually borrowing this overheard from a friend my friend Ashley was tailgating at a college football game she overheard a man on his cell phone saying the following,

I didn't criticize you. All I'm saying is that we're going to Costa Rica in six weeks, and you probably didn't need to eat half a pizza. That's going to be a romantic trip. Yeah, probably the wrong way to say it any which way when i when is it okay to eat half a pizza whenever there's half a pizza yeah correct i can't eat i can't i used to or like order two whole pizzas and eat them it's just the other night i ate a whole pizza by myself like with no reservations because the restaurant is very well where's

anthony borgham when i need him i'm here i uh i ordered from gg's uh a couple weeks ago and i had not eaten like all day yeah and i ate uh basically like not the whole pizza i got a medium i ate like a quarter of the pizza i three quarters i mean of the pizza i i did the same thing i hadn't eaten all night and then just over the period of two hours i managed to just consume a whole pizza it's so good when i was a young younger man i would order a large pizza and an order of buffalo wings and eat them all in a night no problem yeah yeah skinny as a rail now i'm 400 pounds i can't even eat a slice you wash yourself with a rag on a stick um this last one now honestly this is oh also have you either of you guys ever tailgated had i've been to a tailgate

party so yeah i guess not and i tailgate people when i'm in traffic because i'm an asshole and i get a i got a little back end from aladdin good work everybody uh this last one comes from josh w and i want to say this is probably one of the most whimsical overheards in a long time it's the, you know, kids say the darndest things style. I have an overheard that was told to me by my wife. She is a nanny of twin boys who are four years old.

They are very articulate and thoughtful. A couple days ago, the boys were asking my wife questions about me. What do I do at work? Will I ever come by their house riding my red motorcycle? Etc. They are really into cars, trucks, and motorcycles. After their brief exchange, one of the boys wistfully exclaimed,

I wish I had a husband. His brother thought about this comment for a bit and replied with a sigh, Yeah, I wish I had a husband too. Pretty great, eh? Put that in your pocket and take it to work my goodness well that that would have made that doesn't make your whole month something that delightful pretty adorable yeah little kids two gay kids do you remember when you're a kid and just like the idea of someone coming around was good? Like an adult that just like, you know. Or having to go someplace. Going somewhere or somebody coming around.

Currently like what you'll spend your entire day avoiding. Yeah. At all costs. Interaction with human beings that you love and that matter to you in your life. Or like seeing, oh, he's got got when someone's dad got a new car like oh i want to i want to see that yeah i remember it like uh yeah like when an uh i had an uncle that would just like come by and like when that happened that was like man that made the whole week just having a like an uncle come by and he's got some crazy story or oh yeah maybe he's picked up a toy because you might like one of mr cotter's

uncles so it was always hilarious he'd tell you hey i've just been logging in the sahara forest and you'd say sahara forest isn't it sahara desert and he'd go now that's an actual uh is that from welcome back i could tell you were telling a joke so i took a sip of my drink to see if i did a spit take nope didn't happen no i feel bad uh incidentally i feel like i when i said the kids were gay i meant that in a support in a supportive way but it's it's the great thing about a little kid that's a four-year-old is just this woman's going on and on about her husband or husband. Well, I want one of those.

Husband is just a word. And those kids are absolutely so gay. But I also like the idea that... And gay is wrong. They want their own guy to come by on a motorcycle. With motorbikes. Yeah, I wish I had my own guy on a motorbike yeah that's basically what they want are you guys some growing uh mustaches for november no my sister is getting

married so i wouldn't want to have half a mustache you're out of it oh in the photos or whatever wow i already have a full as as full of mustaches as i can have legally i am are you gonna do it uh probably not i can't really grow a mustache it's a pretty bad situation no you can grow like you can grow like a john waters right kind of yeah why not well that was drawn on on the uh on the west ender cover is november is it an international thing if people don't know what it is, it's people grow mustaches to raise awareness of prostate cancer. Now, here's the thing. A study came out a couple weeks ago that said vitamin E supplements, if you've been taking them for a few years or whatever,

they increase your risk of prostate cancer. What? Does that mean we're talking about ecstasy? Yeah. And for American listeners, we call X E. Do they call it X in the States? Yeah, they call it X,

or at least that's what I get from the Sopranos. Vitamin E is Vince's manager on Entourage. And so I've been taking vitamin E for a while, so now I'm stopped taking vitamin E, and now I'm going to get screened just to make sure everything's okay and there's a whole

there's a whole yeah you can just get a blood test it's like $30 and they just get a blood test and it's better than the rectal than the finger and the so it's much ado about absolutely nothing these days.

Like, how many stand-up whatevers have been... I just turned 40, you know what that means. You know what that means. Babe, could you buy me dinner first? That's the crowd laughing. Although, I would say that Brent Butt, Pascal's Brent Butt, has the greatest one line about having the prostate exam.

That the doctor went at me like he was trying to get the last pickle out of the pickle jar. Pretty fantastic. Pretty good. Analysis of the situation. Pretty good. I saw a mustache today, and it it looked it was a guy who was uh he was gray haired but his mustache was gray yeah at the edges but dark in the middle so it

looked like he had the phantom hitler yeah he should get curse of the phantom he should get Curse of the Phantom. He's got that dye product just for Aryans. It's not bad. Now, in addition to overheards that have been written in, we also get phoned in overheards. And if you want to call us, our phone number is 206-339-8328, like these people have. Sure. Hey, Dave and Graham, it's Jesse from Toronto. I was just on the subway, and I saw these two 14... This is an overheard.

I didn't say that off the top. These two 14-year-old guy kids, one of whom had a mullet and a neon green hat, because that's in style now now from what I can tell. Anyway, the only part of the conversation I heard was I was in between

a thing I was listening to ended and I was going to change it and I heard this one kid say, oh man, Doritos are like Ambrosia. Oh, up all night with Ambrosia flavor. Is Ambrosia like one that's bits of Jell-O in a... In whipped cream?

Yeah. I think that is the modern day Ambrosia, but I think it's like the nectar of the gods, isn't it? Oh, really? Like Ambrosia is like the tastiest thing in the world. Doritos are like Ambrosia. Really? Oh's like the nectar of the gods isn't it oh really like ambrosia is like the tastiest thing in the world really oh wow that's really funny that it's like uh because now it's the grossest thing in the world well doritos are pretty good no but ambrosia oh uh jello and whipped cream did you say doritos was originally the the food of the gods no i think i feel like yeah i

feel like i missed a chunk of that conversation. I think ambrosia was. I may have misspoken. And if so, shame on me. But I was saying, isn't ambrosia like it's the food of the gods but it's the grossest thing on earth? Right? Ambrosia salad? Isn't that one that you avoid?

No, it's good. Ambrosia's like it's the sweet marshmallow-y jello salad that you eat with a savory meal is that not disgusting it's pretty delicious oh is it really yeah oh food of the guts it's up there it's like food of the bob the doritos guy that jay l Leno was looking for? Sure. That's the sign. Ambrosia before Amhoja. Yeah, sure. Absolutely. I thought you were going to do a rhyme like,

Ambrosia before Doritos, everything's neato. Doritos before Ambrosia, you ain't sleeping over. Close enough. Define rhyme. Hi, guys. This is Morty, and i'm calling from new york in america and i'm really honored to talk to you because you guys are so funny here's my overheard it's amazing i was walking on the upper east side of manhattan and um and walking toward me on the sidewalk were these three people. They were a blonde, very chic looking mother type and her two equally chic, tiny children.

It looked like a nine-year-old son and like an 11-year-old daughter. And they had clearly done a lot of shopping. They, each of them, really each of them had at least, no, I'd say exactly two or three like designer name shopping bags on each arm. And they had all three of them like in step were walking with this very sort of purposeful, no bullshit walk that said like, we got to get to the next store. We got to shop. We got to shop. And so they're walking like real fast,

like real ferociously, like into the wind. And here's what's great. All of a sudden, the mother woman drops her three, three of her bags on the ground, looks at her watch, and says, Shit, we have to get home for Grandma's funeral. Whoa!

So all that shopping was for funeral times? It was just a day of shopping, and I think they just got carried away and forgot about grandma's funeral and that's how they became the nanny the whole time i was thinking of the nanny like just somebody with like a lot of bags with the paper coming out of the top of them and a grandma had died in one of those crushing scenes yeah uh she's the lady in black When everyone else is born and chained Did you guys As teenagers Fran Drescher pretty sexy? Yes

No Not on my list There's no Daphne from Frasier Oh you would have picked Daphne over Roz? Yes Oh then we have nothing. But I think you're just thinking Roz because she played a slut. No.

Well, come on. Roz is... I don't know. Roz is a lot sexier than Daphne. I just saw Roz playing a guest character role on Order. Criminal Intent. Oh, did she do it? Was she the killer?

No, but she was a slut. Yeah. Actually, it was Bulldog killed the guy. Real life gay. Real life gay playwright. Is there any other kind? Zim Zam. For people out there who don't know,

that's Joey's radio DJ catchphrase. Zim Zam. Chugging in the morning. Zim Zam. Let's chug it in the morning. Zim Zam. Those streets are packed. And I can say this stuff because Charlie has gay relatives. Yeah, exactly.

Hi, guys. This is John from Cleveland, Ohio, calling with an overheard. I just got back from the grocery store, and I was in the produce section near all the fruit, and there was a very overweight African-American woman with her very overweight daughter. And the daughter looked up at the grapes and goes, Mom, can we get some fruit? And the mom goes, Oh, shut up. You know you ain't going to eat that shit.

I don't know how I feel about that. I know how I feel. Not good. I didn't realize it was a racial thing. Although I did hear a friend of mine told a similar story. Didn't specify race or size, but

it was a kid running behind his dad. His dad was kind of a rough neck type and his kid was running behind the dad with a bag of cookies and he's like dad dad can we get these and the dad looked and he's like fuck he's just had enough of that kid's nonsense yeah Yeah, like, you know that shit ain't good. Like, I think we're not excited enough about being grown-ups. Because you had to work so hard to get

anything out of your parents when you were a kid. Like, everything was... There was so much effort in, like, chasing after them to get them to do something fun. And now that we're grown-ups, I mean, like, sure, we can do whatever we want. But you also

realize the sadness of, like, in the same way that if you're ever watching pornography and you stop and think, like, oh, that's... They're in a real room that smells like cum. Like... It's not yet, it doesn't. No, that's the thing. It probably

already does. There's a lot of turnover. There are earlier takes. And the philosophers have said, like, fantasy turned to reality becomes a nightmare. You, huh, when you, like, I've been in gas stations in the middle of the night, and you buy, like, a bag of M&Ms, and you drink, like, a a bag of m&ms and you drink it like a shot out of the bag and it's just like this is a sad this is horrible they should just let kids have a bunch of money to enjoy it because we're not going to be able to no it's true next time you

see a kid just give them a 50 bill you know how you have 50 bills in your pocket yep what would a kid even know? He wouldn't even know it was real money. Because our $50 looks like a cartoon money. When I was a kid, I was so... I was like... I was afraid to go up to a counter

and give them money. I would make my dad buy stuff for me. Really? Oh man, I don't understand that fear. Yeah, I was just really shy. I was big. Anytime I had any money to spend. If I could go buy a comic book, holy shit. Oh, I got over it.

But the first few times, I would make a cry face. I remember the first time I was buying condoms, and I was late to the game. Well, you didn't use them the first time I was buying condoms, and I was late to the game. Well, you didn't use them the first few years. Yeah, because I bought... Diaphragms.

I don't want to date myself here, but I first bought condoms using an iPhone app. And I remember everything that I had been told was like, oh, you're going to be so embarrassed. And I felt exactly the opposite. I felt like I could buy whatever I wanted. I could buy Slim Fast and Preparation H or whatever. Because, hey, here's the proof. I'm getting laid. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, I don't... Yeah, I don't... The proof is in the pudding. Oh, yeah. Ring up this pudding i just i like i'm trying to think of like the only thing that i didn't like and i've i i used it recently in a debaters episode i was in is when i was younger i was very afraid of video store clerks that i would give them the name of a

movie and they would somehow twist it into a burn and burn me with it because when i was a kid e.g well yeah example when my brother and i we wanted to rent this is years and years ago there was a christina rucci ritchie movie called the opposite of Sex. And I was afraid that when I would ask for it, that the clerk would say, why don't you check your bedroom? And so I would always get my brother to go and actually ask where the movie was. Because I was afraid of getting burned and not having a response. Was this one of those movie rental places that didn't have any movies on display where you just had to go up to a clerk and say?

They had them, but you know, like, there's video stores that would do them in alphabetical order. Some of the categories. Yeah, they used to be in either by director or by genre. So if you didn't really know what the genre was, a la The Opposite of Sex,

is that a comedy? Is that a drama? What is that? And I wanted to see it, and so I made my brother go ask because I was afraid of getting zinged. Yeah. I think it might be under unfunny comedy.

It had Johnny Zalecki or Galecki. Oh, really? David from Roseanne? David from Roseanne slash whoever from Big Bang Theory. Yeah, no, that's the... Also the kid from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.

That is correct. Remember Bob Odenkirk had those funny shorts that he was doing? Were they jams? No, it was his Ken Burns Clam Diggers series. No, he was doing a series of internet shorts and these two great guys. And then they had to pause it for a little while while the one dude went to go do, you know, the first few episodes of this Big Bang show that would never amount to anything.

And then, oh, that's right. It was it was a duo, right? Clam and Jam or something like two guys yeah. There was two guys' names. And they were actually really funny. They were really funny. I don't remember. Cool. Or maybe I have no reason to remember because I didn't know.

Didn't see them. The Big Bang Theory. Well, it's about time to wrap her up. If you want to get in touch with us via email, it is stoppodcastyourself at gmail.com if you would like to sponsor the show like our time traveling friend did uh it's maximumfun.org slash jumbotron and uh charlie if uh now you're you're you're an author you're a comedian you're a writer at large uh what do you have coming up in the next little while? Um, well, if I could, I would love to ask the people out there listening, if they would like to buy my books, they can do so. Yes.

Um, online or from your local bookstore. They are called Vancouver Special. That is a book of essays. And the prescription errors. That is the novel. Yeah. And, um. It's a whodunit. it's a whodunit.

It's a whodunit. It's a who-wrote-this-shit. Who-prescribed-it. And where are you performing coming up? Where can people see it? Because if you haven't seen Charlie, if you live in Vancouver, if you haven't seen Charlie perform stand-up comedy,

you're only doing a disservice to yourself. Because it really is amazing to see on stage. And it's like you write books and you do all this other stuff. And then you amazing to see on stage. It's like you write books and you do all this other stuff. Then you're also amazing at comedy. Do people the service. Tell them where they can see you. That's very kind.

I'm going to be hosting the Just for Laughs showcase on November 12th. Where is that? At the Comedy Mix. That is on Berard and Nelson. Nelson, it's right next to St. Paul's. Yep.

At Hospital. And where you'll need to go after you laugh yourself herniac. And I'll be in Prince George. What's the name of the, what's the name, I'm sorry to interrupt. No, it's okay. I was addressing your listeners in the Prince George area. What's the name of the church that's next to the comedy

club on the other side? St. Andrews Wesley. So it's between St. Paul's and St. Andrews. That's weird. I never thought of that. It should be called St. Ha Ha's or something like that. St. Assisi's of Hilarity. St. Elmo's Fire. Of jokes. Now you're going to be in Prince George. Oh, I understand you're going to be in Prince George. That's what I heard. Yes, on the I think it's the 17th and 18th of jokes. Now you're going to be in Prince George. Oh, I understand you're going to be in Prince George.

That's what I heard. On the, I think it's the 17th and 18th of November. It's a Thursday, Friday. Right on. Beat me up. Come on, small towners. Now, Dave and I, we've... Don't really beat me up.

For the listeners of the podcast, Laura Champion had set up a uh bring stop podcasting yourself to toronto page on facebook we're working on it and it's it's coming ever closer to reality we're hoping that we will be able to come out there i'm talking with venues so things are in the works yeah wheels are in motion it will be so great oh and the other show that you can maybe catch me at, if people are in town, because this will be fans of this podcast will want to be there because Paul F. Tompkins will also be there, is on November 29th

at the Debaters. Not only Paul F. Tompkins, Dave Shumka debating Paul F. Tompkins. Oh yeah, you're debating Paul F. Tompkins, that's right. Yeah. So, Paul F. Tompkins in town, yeah, you're debating Paul F. Tompkins. That's right, yeah. So, Paul F. Tompkins, in town to do The Debaters, the very next night at the Rio Theater, New York Commercial Drive. I have my tickets. It's going to be, if you're a fan of Paul F. Tompkins,

and why wouldn't you be? If you're not a fan of Paul F. Tompkins, learn about him, and you will be. He's going to be playing at the Rio Theater here in Vancouver. And I'm taking Jordan from the show. Really? The Cel Ray producer guy. Oh, man.

He really featured strongly in this episode. Yeah. Okay. Here's another thing. Go on. Here's another thing to promote. Go on. November 18th in Vancouver.

Yes. Seven days after Remembrance Day. Yep. Yeah, lest we forget. Which is Remembrance Day this year, 11-11-11. Fun. Corduroy. Yeah. What does Corduroy-11. Fun. Corduroy. Yeah. What does Corduroy mean?

It just resembles Corduroy. Oh, that's very neat. They died so that you could make jokes like that. It's true. They died a long time ago. And it wasn't really for that either. Oh, they didn't? It wasn't for that? That's kind of an offshoot.

What do you think of people who were in the trenches? What do you think they think of the trench coat mafia? Guys, I'm going to pee so bad. The trench coat mafia. Okay. Live, stop podcasting yourself. What? Oh, hey.

Right on. At the, is it called the Cosmic Zoo? Cosmic Zoo, but if you drive by it, it is still called the Hennessy. It's the fifth anniversary of the Sunday Service Improv Troupe. They've been doing a weekly show at the Hennessy, which foolishly renamed

itself the Cosmic Zoo with a K. Yeah, but the sign does not say that. It still says Hennessy in the front. That's at 53 West Broadway, and all weekend long, that weekend, they're doing they've taken over the place. Yeah, they's at 53 West Broadway. And all weekend long, that weekend, they've taken over the place. Yeah, they're going to do shows all weekend. It's going to be great.

And the Friday night is our show. Oh, that's going to be amazing. The guys from the Sunday service are going to be our guests. Not all at once. I'm working on a thing with Ryan Beal for next year's, end of January, beginning of February, the Push Festival, Club Push. We're going to be doing theater,

comedy. No, it's going to be awesome. You don't have to plug that now. I mean, we might. We will. Why don't you stop? November 18th, come see us do a live podcast in Vancouver. $45.

Seems high, right? It's probably $5. But you get a steak dinner with $45. Same time, right? It's probably $5. But you get a steak dinner with that. Not too bad, right? Not too shame. Anyway, yeah. Do you have a guest yet for that? The Sunday Service guys.

Oh, yeah, that's right. The whole squadron. And guys, thank you so much for listening. And also check out the Time Traveler's Pocket Guide. If you want to read about uh you want to be prepared for all eventualities in time travel that's the book to read funny stuff uh thanks for listening everybody if you like the podcast please tell your friends we'll see you all back here next week for another futuristic episode of stop Podcasting Yourself.

I really like the shirt you're wearing. This is a lot of fun. It's really outdoorsy. It's like what Marty had on in number three. Yeah. His was dirtier. Yeah, but he was in the Old West. Yeah.

Credit where credit's due. I love how you just got the first name of the character and not the name of the movie. Just three. Marty in number three. In number three. Why? It's because... Martin Scorsese? It's because on Sopranos

when they refer to Godfather or Godfather 2 as just Francis in one framed it as like it's just assumed what we're talking about 189? 189, Dave testing Graham testing

Get your 189 I don't even know what that's from That's true My mama 189 My mama 189 That's your 189 You know that it's real