Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 201 - Jon Dore

Episode Date: January 24, 2012

Comedian Jon Dore returns to talk about Australia, bears, Banksy, and Hulk Hogan.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 201 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is the Michael Landon of Michael Knight of Knight Rider slash Highway to Heaven. Was that what Michael Landon was on? Yeah, he was on a number of things.

What else was he on? Little House. Oh, your name's Dave Shumka. Yep. Little House. He was on Little House. He was your name's Dave Shumka. Yep. Little House. He was on Little House. He was on... That's the abbreviation.

It's called Little House on the Prairie. But a lot of people ended up calling it Little House. Like, did you see Little House last night? That did happen. People just abbreviated it Little House when they were live tweeting it. Oh, my God. What a great little. Did you see it?

Some people even said little. Or they'd abbreviate it to Lil. The other voice you're hearing is Jonathan David-Doerr. From television. From radio. From television. Yeah. Movies.

And soon to be an author. Oh, really? Is that true? Not at all. Not at all. I knew it was going to do that. But would have given us something to talk about. Yeah.

That's the challenge sometimes I find when the three of us gather. And I like you two a lot, by the way. This is just an excuse for me to hang out with two people that I genuinely enjoy. And I know sometimes I sound sarcastic, but I really mean it. Dave, I like you. Graham, I like you. I like you too. And I like us.

Yeah, we're good. Do we want to get to know us? Get to know us. Get to know us. John, you're good. Do we want to get to know us? Get to know us. Get to know us. John, you're writing a book. I am not writing a book, but I think of writing a book. I always think, you know what, it would be fun to write a book because then you wouldn't have to go on the road. You wouldn't have to deal with unruly audiences.

You do book readings. Sometimes I enjoy it. I'd like to write a book called I Hope This Gets Me a Book Tour. And then the book is all about what I would do on a book tour. Yeah. That's fun. Action adventure. What would anyone do on a book tour?

Well, I would just enjoy the different hotels. I would take advantage of... Meet Barnes and Noble. Meet Noble. They're not on speaking terms. Oh, really? I'd meet Noble and ask him about all the dirt on Barnes. And Wiss Smith.

Are they still around? Yeah. What is that? I think... W.H. Smith. W.H. Smith. Smith. Yeah.

Smith's. It's Will Smith's store with a big H in the middle. Will H. Smith, like Jesus H. Christ. Yeah. He's W.H. Smith. What else is there? Kohl's? Is that still around?

I think Will Smith is in airports. I think they have them there. Do they still have them? You should do a book tour of airport bookshops. Only. Yeah. And you need to go through security. I'd love to do.

Oh, like on the other side. Yeah, yeah, yeah. See how the other side works. Yes, yes. And the book is How to Get Through Security with Illegal Items. And I'm doing the book tour inside security. Yeah, how to get through security without a plane ticket. Yes, how to get through security without a plane ticket.

The John Doerr way. John Doerr way to reading, yeah. Yeah. And a thousand people show up and I realize, you don't need this book. I'd like to read a book. Would you like to write a book? I'd like to read a book. Oh, did I say read? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'd love to read one. Yeah. But I feel like if I read one,

I don't want to be inspired by someone else's work. I just want to do my... I want to be the only person who's written a book who's never read a book. You want to go a complete blank slate. And you accidentally just write Catcher in the Rye by accident. Well, there have been people who have, like, there have been bands that have, like, made albums that have never heard music. Really?

Yeah. Kings of Leon? Did any of them really make it? Oh, Kings of Leon? Yeah. They've never heard music before. Yeah, they've never heard music before. They've never heard music. They were raised Amish Mormon.

Right. Quaker. Amish Mormon. Right. Quaker. Amish Mormon Quaker. Amish Quaker Mormon. Oats. Yeah. They were raised Amish. They had oats in their ears until they went through their rumspringa.

Then they were allowed to take the oats out. Yeah. Yeah. And it was just hall. Yeah, it was just hall. Never heard music. And then they became the kings of leon yeah who's this leon that they're kings of oh it's a furniture store yeah yeah regional furniture

store is that what it is they're the kings of leon yeah yeah it's it's you haven't heard of it because it's amish whenever i'm in leon's okay so yeah i'm not writing a book right that's where i'd like to start reading uh not doing a lot of reading uh except the quran i read that regularly sure but i would just like to say thanks so much for having me on the show again this is the fourth time i've been on your program and it's always just fun i don't know if the viewer the listeners enjoy it but i do know people love it they dislike it well we actually did get some complaints like some people do not like hearing me on this and that's fine well there was one complaint that's not true i know there's more but go on uh yeah uh but you're great we we

love having you here and you know what we let graham say it because you come across as sarcastic graham go ahead john we love having you here that's really good dave teasing teasing uh who is i'm teasing you okay yes dave. Yes. Dave teasing, teasing. Yes, Dave teasing. So what's going on? You're not writing a book. What are you doing? Oh, so you want to talk about my life?

What's going on? Well, I'll tell you this right now. I've been on tour. Ended up telling a few fun projects in the pipeline that may or may not happen. Those are always fun, but let's not talk about them because they're not a guarantee. Sure. However, been on the road telling jokes, finding it hard to write new material, whatever.

That's why I travel all over the world telling old jokes to people, and it seems real. I went to Australia for the second time. Really? It was a lot of fun. Where in Australia? I went to Sydney, performed at the Comedy Store. It doesn't matter where he went in Australia.

Well, Perth is different. It's not different. It doesn't matter where he went in Australia. Well, Perth is different. It's not different. It's all crazy. I think Perth and Sydney are quite different. Yeah, they're very far apart. But it doesn't matter. Perhaps Graham had visited before and wanted to know, John, did you share the same travel experience as I did?

Graham's never been outside of Vancouver. That's a lie. And I'm going to tell you why. I've seen Graham in Toronto. I've seen Graham in Moncton. I've seen Graham in London, Ontario. The big three.

Bermuda Triangle. Okay, so tell us about Australia. Well, Australia was wonderful. It's one of the greatest places you could ever visit. Everyone is gorgeous. That's what I've heard. Yeah, I've not seen an overweight person there.

Why do so many of their people... You can be gorgeous and overweight. Shut the fuck up, Dave. That's bullshit. You fucking know it. You guys. Anyway. Yeah, it's great there.

Why do so many people leave there and then come to this country? Well, because it sucks. I don't know. I guess maybe you feel removed. It is. You are isolated. You're insulated. Your media is, you know, you receive American media on your television. Maybe you get curious. You want to see the rest of the world. Sure. Because, yeah, you know, you receive American media on your television. Maybe you get curious.

You want to see the rest of the world. Sure. Because, yeah, you're on this huge island. And there are a lot of shark attacks, a lot of flooding. A lot of kangaroo. I get sick of eating kangaroo meat. And you're only there for a short term. Yeah.

But everywhere you go. But, no, it has wonderful places. And it's a 15-hour flight over. And I now kind of tell this joke in my stand- places and uh it's a 15 hour flight over and i now kind of tell this joke in my stand-up um but it's absolutely true i was so terrified of a 15 hour flight i wanted to make sure i was properly medicated so that i did not remember the flight and so i overdid it uh definitely overdid it probably quadrupled um an already double dose of Klonopin, which is basically Xanax.

And so I thought, this will be great. I'll have some booze, and I'll... Your doctor told you to. Watch the chases. It says, do not... It says if you mix it with alcohol, it may increase the effect of drowsiness. All right.

Which is... What were you going to say? Increase kangaroos? Okay, well, some sort of kangaroo interaction. All right. Which is, what were you going to say? Increased kangaroos? Okay, well, some sort of kangaroo interaction. What would be a kangaroo increase? Just lots of kangaroos? Like,

one kangaroo gets bigger or there are many kangaroos? I think it's your kangaroo-based activity goes up. Oh, my kangaroo, oh,

jeez. Like you wake up in a pouch. That would be a dream. I wish my mom had a pouch. I wish humans were marsupials. That's my wish. And then World Peace. Do you think that you could get that through the Make-A-Wish Foundation?

My wish is that World Peace would change his name back to Ron Artest. I love that he's now World Peace. Meta World Peace. Meta World Peace, because it is so funny when you hear announcers say, and Kobe, over to World Peace. And I don't think he was joking, yet it is so funny when you hear announcers say, and Kobe over to World Peace. And I don't think he was joking, yet it's so funny to me now. Could he have picked a funnier name for the announcers to have to say 30 times a game? Jolly Green Giant.

Jolly Green Giant. Anything works. Yeah. Cashmere Sweater. Junkyard Dog. Well, something that maybe would would embarrass kobe to pass to him like oh i see yeah kobe to uh you know take a dump yeah lacy under things yeah and kobe over to take a dump back to kobe back to take a dump well how about we make that the theme for the

podcast and as we think of something funny for Kobe to pass to, we'll see what runner Tess could have named himself to make it more entertaining. We're planning our callbacks. I like it. Yeah, yeah. Why not? It gets the listener excited. What will they come up with, they say?

Okay, we have a whiteboard. I'm just going to write down your idea. Thank you. Yeah. Well, that could be his name. Whiteboard. Kobe passes the whiteboard. It doesn't always have to be.

It could be whiteboard grabs the rebound. Grabs the board. Grabs the board. Grabs the board, whiteboard. So anyway, I'm on my way to Australia, and about two hours, about half an hour into the flight, I medicated, over-medicated, and then I have no memory,

genuinely no recollection of anything until I woke up in my hotel room in Australia at 7 p.m. So I missed 12 hours of flying, the ride from the airport to the hotel. In a kangaroo pouch. In a kangaroo pouch. Customs. If my girlfriend wasn't with me, I probably would have been on a plane right back to the United States.

So then I wake up in my hotel room at 7 o'clock at night. We had landed at 10 in the morning. So that's all memory gone. And then it's thoroughly entertaining because the next day is just everything being retold to me, which was like, I did that? Oh, I was amazing. So, yeah, I don't know if I recommend it, but I was thrilled that I don't remember a 15-hour flight. Next time you do it, you should strap a Polaroid camera to you and get people to take pictures of you doing all these crazy

things. I'd love it. I'd love a documentary. I'd love a documentary of... It would be great if you weren't sleeping at all. The whole time you were just in a state. There are times I was not. Yeah, but for most of the flight you probably slept. I think for most of the flight, I slept.

When I got up and it was Craig, the guy who picked me up at the airport. That's another thing. Craig, who I love and I miss, and I met him the time before, and he was picking me up in the airport. He was not happy that he was excited to see me. And here's this, like, glassy-eyed loser who just comes, you know, doesn't recognize him at all. But he said I kept pressing the hazard buttons in the car continually and then he finally said can you stop and i said apparently said no no trust me on this one i don't know what that means what do you think you were trying for i have no idea really i have no idea what i was probably just genuinely trying to be annoying

like i am sometimes yeah like bothering someone who's trying to concentrate. That's a fun thing to do. It is. Yeah, so that was fun. But then getting to Australia, yeah, it's wonderful. I'm going to go back again soon. So that's what I've been up to. And trying to buy a home, that's the other issue. So you're going to be an adult homeowner in the next...

Probably by the next time you come on the podcast, you will own a home. If all goes well, Graham, maybe we could do the podcast from my home. That would be fun. Would you travel down to do the podcast? you will own a home. If all goes well, Graham, maybe we could do the podcast from my home. That would be fun. Would you travel down to do the podcast? Sure. Okay. We want to go by way of Australia, though. It sounds like a lot of fun.

Let's do it. Let's do that. Are you terrified to be a home owner? Not at all. I'm excited to be a home owner. I like the idea of having a place to put shit. Yeah. But do you have an apartment now? Or are you just kind of... I have an apartment.

And where do you leave all your stuff? Why are you so upset about that? I leave my stuff in the apartment. It gets crowded and it always feels temporary. I want a place where I can just sit down and do nothing for the rest of my life. Ideally, it would be great to get a home that you never had to leave and you can work out of there.

Bring people to you. Yeah. Like a Hunter S. Thompson, or some sort of... Or just a hunter. Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah. Well, no, the hunter has to leave the house. No, no, no, you bring... Bait out.

Oh, and you bring the animals in to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, well, I see. I'd prefer not to have the guns. That would be my only difference. You could kill them with a boomerang. I don't want to kill anything, Graham. Why don't you get like a bear trap?

Oh, and there is a bear in the neighborhood where I have bought the house. The person I went to see the house and the person who's selling the house says there's a bear that comes to the neighborhood every night. What is that, West Hollywood? No, it's not. I'll tell you where it is. No, it's in the mountains. Is that a selling point or a... Yeah.

I think that's a selling point. I think so. A bear that wanders through the neighborhood at night, to me, is a selling point. Because it's exciting. It is fun. It's very exciting. But you're not... You're going to go...

Because the place that you're planning on living is out in the remote area. It's about two hours away from Los Angeles, proper. And you're not going to own a rifle? No. It seems like you should. going to own a rifle? No. Seems like you should. I'm not a rifle guy. No, no, I know, but for production. Bare hands.

Bare hands. Karate. I'm building a suit. I know this isn't original, but I'm building a bear fighting suit. Uh-huh. Complete with tank treads and flamethrower arms. It's a little bit different. It's a little more offensive than defensive.

Previous bear suits have been defensive. But you're going to go out and try it. Mine has tank treads so that I don't have to worry about losing energy. Climbing over bears. It moves over bears. And flamethrower arms, which do lift me off the ground. That's pretty great. Yeah, if I need to.

Does it light the ground on fire? Yes. It torches the ground. Yeah. That's fun. So those are my plans. Buy a home with a bear wanderer So you and the bear are going in on this together?

A transient bear The bear is just there You can't get rid of the bear So he's not paying the mortgage? Or does he contribute to the down payment? I've asked him, he says no He's a talking bear What character is that?

Every time I feel like a question's stupid I respond with a stupid bear. What character is that? Well, I don't know. Every time I feel like a question's stupid, I respond with a stupid character. What? How is that a stupid question? How is that a stupid question? It was a great question. It was a great question. I was being silly.

I was being silly. Thank you. I was being silly. But yeah, I feel like that's all I really need to say. Those are two exciting things in my life right now, trying to become a homeowner. And that's about it. And if I do become a homeowner, it's going to be a very dangerous place to do a podcast yeah but how great would it be to do a podcast and there's a bear outside the podcast it would be great if we do a nighttime podcast and there's a bear scratching at the window now will you do anything to try and

get the bear to not come around are you gonna make it a real comfortable place i would love it to come by i will hang I will hang bacon on trees. Pots of honey everywhere. Do bears eat bacon? They'll smell that and eat it. They'll do it. Salmon, honey. I think anything is... I'm going to try and reroute the Pacific Salmon

River through... Through a trench in your garage. Yes, I mean, I'm going to try and get a grant to run salmon through uphill. They can do that. They've been known to do that. Yeah, they can swim uphill. Well, if you can't manage that, Graham and I would love to come by and spawn.

I would love to have the two of you come by and spawn. We'll spawn all over your garage. Yeah. Okay. It's a date. Mm-hmm. What have you guys been up to? I feel like it's been so long since we spoke.

Last time I was here, Graham, we were out watching the Vancouver Canucks who eventually lost and then this city burned to the ground and then it rebuilt. But last time I saw you, we were watching a Canucks game here. Yeah, we were in some bar. Some sort of Moxie's.

I think we were hanging out in a Moxie's. Was that it? Well. Keg? Something like that. Something like that. Watching a game. It was hard to get a. Oh, no. It was a Milestones.

Milestones. Yeah. That's what it was. Yeah. Milestones. It was a Milestones. So that happened. Our city burnt to cinders, right?

And we decided to rebuild it from scratch. Certain parts. There's still, like, downtown, there's, sometimes you'll be walking on the sidewalk and you'll be like, oh, a car burnt on this patch. Oh, really? Yeah. So were you guys, were you guys, not that you were out riding,

but, I mean, were you guys caught up in any of it? Like, was it near your neighborhoods? Was it? Well, it all took place right outside the CBC building where I work. Right. But it took place at like 8 o'clock at night, and I left work at 4 to go home and watch the game. And watch the riots. Yeah, yeah, basically.

That's insane. It took me like 5 or 10 minutes just to get a block away from my work. Right, yeah, yeah. So that's as caught up in it as I got. Are you okay? You know what? It still hurts. I was thinking of calling you right away, saying, like, I know Dave works near there.

I hope he's all right. I hope he made it away from the riot. Our London drugs really got trashed. Our downtown location of London drugs. Yeah, our local drugstore. Yeah. Well, if you can, get some Klonopin and go to Australia if you're gonna riot through a pharmacy.

People went in and looted the drugstore, but I didn't hear any reports of them stealing drugs. That's ridiculous. If you're going to take a risk, take a risk. People were coming home with a box of chocolates.

Turtles. I've got gloss turtles. I've got glossettes. I got pregnancy tests. Did you find the pain medication? I couldn't. I got held up in the tampon section. Look it. Yeah. But people were asking like,

what's wrong with Vancouver? Why are they like that? And I had to tell them, look it, it is everyone. And they are all like that always. But it is weird. They always riot here uh it's becoming montreal-ish weird yeah concerts they riot here yeah sporting events sporting events yeah the weird thing is i the uh the person who riots or like it was uh it was like the riot tour yeah the riot or they had a certain look about them yeah it's like the same kind of

people you would see on a friday night on granville street so it wasn't necessarily fans it was people using it as an excuse but people still dress that way it's like oh you look you still look exactly like a rioter you're you're wearing the uniform of the rider the uh gold chains and the uh that you stole from london drives yeah they do have a jewelry department there sure yeah um yeah the uh they haven't have they prosecuted anybody from that i think uh 30 people so far that's lucky because i think there was only 40 involved yeah it was a really small riot they prosecuted 40uted 30 people for the riot. Yeah, so far. Okay. It's too bad nobody videotaped it.

That's the thing. Yeah. In this day and age. It predated video. By like only by a couple weeks. Yeah, because now YouTube's like huge. But at the time. Have you guys seen this Dick in a Box video?

Which one? Dick in a Box? No, no, I have not. Oh, it's from Saturday Night Live. What's that? It's a television... Television? What's that?

It's a medium. What's that? It's a TV show with Patricia Arquette. And we've just been playing What's That? We'll be right back. With Patricia Arquette. It's a medium with Patricia Arquette. She's my favorite of the Arquettes

Oh really? I like Alexis Who's that? The transgender Oh, that's right, there was that one Don't get me started on that I don't like anything that starts with trans What about a trans-am? Portation? Forget the ams

Okay Trans-fat Trans-mogify? If you can't pronounce it, you can't say it Portation Forget the ams Okay Yeah Trans fats Trans Modify What's that If you can't pronounce it You can't say it Yeah that's true

That's the rule I signed on for Translate Yes Don't like it Translink Don't like it Trans fats

Don't like it You already said it What He said trans fats Yeah I did I wanted to make sure Trans Siberian Orchestra Only exception Only exception You already said it. What? He said Transfats? Yeah. I did? I wanted to make sure. Transsiberian Orchestra.

Only exception. Yeah. Only exception. They do a dynamite Christmas show. Do they really? Yeah. I didn't see any ads for them this past holiday. Oh, you did? And they use genuine dynamite.

Yeah. Yeah, they do. There are three big Christmas shows that come through your town. I'd love to get dynamite and just have it. Well, that's what having a house is all about. That's what a house is all about. You can think of the things you can hide in a house. Napalm.

Like an apartment's weird because you never know when the landlord's coming in to inspect some sort of, you know, fire alarm or something. Or like dynamite inspection. See, do you have dynamite now? Yeah. Oh, we had the arsonist in Los Angeles. Oh, yeah. Did that make news?

And they caught him a block down from my house from my apartment what do you mean he's originally from vancouver he lived in vancouver makes fucking sense two years before he moved to los angeles firebugs unbelievable he's probably here getting people ready for the riot then moved down well maybe he was just carrying over the riots was he wearing a vancouver jersey when he got caught yeah he didn't have a ponytail did he no that's yeah he also maybe had some curlers he stole from a london drugs somewhere on his person see i have a ponytail and curly hair but as well my parents were in town the entire time the arsonist was here mr and mrs door yeah mr and mrs door and i for a little i did

suspect them for a bit but then i was able to rule oh like it started when they arrived yeah they were in town when the arsonist was and it was mental i mean he set so many fires and apparently he was using devices putting them under cars which would explode catch fire it was crazy for me they caught the guy blocked from your block down from my place at sunset in fairffax. So we walked down, my girlfriend and I walked down at about three in the morning

or a little earlier than that, I guess about one in the morning, walked down and flares out 15 cop cars, all the news stations were there, photographers.

Yeah, it was great. It was very exciting. I love because that kind of excitement where you can watch it on TV and then say that is a block down.

We are getting dressed. We are getting dressed. We're going to go see what's happening. Wow. Yeah. What was, did he have a thing? I don't know what his motive was yet. I don't know.

That's what I'm curious to know. I don't know if he was targeting the rich, if he had a bigger message, or if he was just like, I love fire. I just love fire. Yeah. Where does a person go who loves fire, but doesn't want to be

a criminal oh yeah is there like a dexter equivalent like arsonist who only arsenize arsonists so a way of morally excusing somehow the arsonist like your dad reaches you early on and says oh you you've got the arsonist in you i'm gonna teach you how to channel this maybe they do those controlled burns they do in the forest. Yeah. Would that be enough for an arsonist? It could be that, yeah. Where else is lighting fires? Controlled fire, yeah.

Birthdays? No, no. Bonfires. Bonfires. Boy scouts. Boy scout bonfires. You need a serial arsonist. I don't know if there are many more.

Going on Survivor? That's a show still. When else would you be able to justify a blazing inferno? A three-block blazing inferno. Oh, Burning Man. Ah, there you go. I think the story of Burning Man was

the guy was an arsonist. Let's write a TV show arsonist what's it going to be about stop it you stopped yourself so it's much like Dexter but an arsonist

it would be impossible to justify you could never win the audience over from the first time he burned down a house, he'd be like, Google. Oh, but then he works for the fire department too, right? He'd have to work for the fire department. God, who's lighting all these fires? I'm tired of fighting them.

Let's just let them burn. Then the monologue in his head, uh-oh, I think I better get out of here. They saw me with a lighter yesterday. They know I'm not a smoker. Uh-oh. I think I better get out of here. They saw me with a lighter yesterday. They know I'm not a smoker. Better think quick. And then what is his answer to that? His thinking quick. I found it on the ground.

That's as exciting as it gets. You wouldn't be able to do anything else with it. I think it might belong to the arsonist. A one episode idea. Um... Has anyone ever, like, how far has anyone ever made it into the TV pitch process with just a one episode idea. Has anyone ever, like, how far has anyone ever made it into the TV pitch process with just a one episode idea before someone asks, okay, what about episode two? Oh, I don't know.

That show that just got cancelled, the one about the guys who dress up like women to get a job. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That probably only had one episode and then they wrote a second and then it got, like we're pretty sure this will peter out after two episodes you could do terminal cancer so guys the lead character has terminal cancer okay now we're stepping on breaking bad territory here sure also the what's that wasn't there a show called the big c called oh there was a show called the big c yeah oh yeah you're imagining a breaking bad where he dies in the first episode. No, I'm talking like episode one, he dies. And then it's the rest about him being a ghost. Yeah. He is.

He makes ghost meth. That is great. A ghost making, because they never catch him. But then there's got to be another angel ghost that comes in to try and stop him. That would be very funny to set up a show as if it was going to be like a procedural drama and the first episode the person dies and then it just becomes a ghost thriller. Oh, it's my dream to waste people's time like that.

I would love, if I had billions of dollars, and I think I may have told you guys this before, if I were, if Schindler's List was never made, and I was the Steven Spielberg, I would spend as much money as i could to make that the most beautiful reflective sad haunting moving production that is absolutely historically accurate from beginning to end with one exception smack dab in the middle unexplained while schindler is looking out over his factory of workers he just glances over at his cigarettes on a table and he

uses telekinesis to hover them over to him everything else is exactly the same except for that one shot and then just put it out in theaters and then watch the reviews come in because otherwise everything is perfectly historically accurate but just at one But just at one point, the cigarette just goes. It just, he hovers them over to himself and then takes a drag. Nothing has ever spoken about it. Wouldn't you love to? Yeah. And then just the interviews

would be great. Now, I noticed in the middle of Schindler's List, there was the moment where he used telekinesis. Yes, yes. Well, why was that in the movie? Well, I did some research

and apparently he thought he had the power of telekinesis. It'd be great. Acting is all about choices. But that wasn't an acting choice. It was a special effect. Yeah, yeah. And then he says, that's what you think.

And then he stares at a cup of coffee, but it never ends. Tries to use it again, yeah. cup of coffee but it never tries to use it again yeah what other movies would you wreck with one one serious movies would you wreck with one with one uh unbelievable moment it would be funny i always thought it'd be funny if uh the first time that you see uh jaws jump out of the water if he said hi yeah talking animals in a serious movie for sure. But he only says it once, and he just says hi. And that's it. Yeah, exactly. Everything else is treated exactly the same.

You take the viewer out of the movie with one moment. Yeah, what's another... I like anything where the person eats something that isn't food. They just start eating a phone? Yeah. So, for example oh like uh uh oh geez uh well like in your schindler's list example they just start eating cigarettes like over dinner yeah yeah yeah and then never eat them again but yeah so like there's one like naked gun or top gun like our top secret type moment in a very serious dramatic film yeah yeah i'd love to waste people's time because the underlying message is who gives a

shit yeah we're all gonna die we don't care about the awards it was a great fucking movie yeah and yeah i got to do telekinesis at one point too Too bad. It would be amazing. Because you know people would just be furious too. How dare you? How dare I what? How dare you defame me? People always get mad when there's a book adaptation

where they don't include everything from the book. But what if you just started adding things that weren't even in the book? Like the girl with the dragon tattoo right she's got a horse tattoo clearly wrong yeah yeah that was our choice well i remember listening to the director's commentary of jfk and i'm not sure if i'm getting this right exactly but oliver stone um said um there wasn't real evidence to suggest that lee harvey oswaldwald and Clay Shaw were in the same room at the same time talking but he said there was like enough evidence for him to believe that

it could have happened so he did include it in the movie so if you're watching the movie it's like oh my god Clay Shaw and Lee Harvey Oswald had conversation so that to me was like going a little bit too far but if you're gonna like like what i would have done with jfk is there should have been a ufo in it like there definitely should have been like he gets killed by a ray from above like just like well no or no but not even involved in the plot like just in the background ufo lands someone gets in it and then they throw like a bag of mcdon McDonald's out the window as it's taking off. Some people don't like when you do a period piece like that

and they make an allusion to some cultural thing. I think there should have been more of that stuff in JFK when they're like, I bet the Beatles are forming right now. Right, yeah. What's going on with you, Dave? Oh, well, it snowed in Vancouver last night What? The first snow of the season Yes

And we took our dog Grandpa up the street He loves the snow Yes And we let him romp around in the park And overnight, I guess some kids or something Presumably park and uh overnight uh i guess some kids or something presumably made a giant uh penis and testicles out of snow yeah great yeah and there wasn't even that much snow but they they made it it's like a very impressive they really rallied the troops yeah and uh not only that but there

was also like tire tracks all around the park. Someone in the middle of the night just drove their car around. But clearly they did that before they made the penis and testicles. That's pretty good. Yeah. Now, what we should do is put up posters around the neighborhood of a snowman missing a penis, saying, if you've seen this... With a bunch of raspberry

jam, where's this? But a snowman would have to be very large. Yes, or maybe he just had a large penis. But since it's a work of art that happened in the middle of the night... Now, is it art?

It is. I mean, do you think Banksy could have done it? Guys, I'm Banksy. Really? You're not as British as I thought you would be. I was an act. I am Banksy. And I'm here, I'm announcing that here today, I am Banksy. I'm not even a little

surprised. My name is Banksy and I'm here to say that I like graffiti in a major way. The penis was not me, but I am Banksy. Okay. So the penis is not a Banksy. Was that a Mr. Brainwash? It could have been a Mr. Brainwash. That was my invention

as well, but I am Banksy, so it's a scoop. Here we are. Any questions? Go ahead. Okay. Is it art? Is what art? You tell me. What is the question? You tell me.

Well, yeah. Checkmate, you guys. Why wouldn't it be? You tell me. Here, I'm going to do a couple things. You tell me if they're art. Okay? Okay.

I don't like that at all. So not art? No, maybe it's controversial. Maybe that's what makes're art. Okay? Okay. I don't like that at all. So not art? No. No, maybe it's controversial. Maybe that's what makes it art. I went to the Getty in Los Angeles. If you get a chance, I highly recommend going. Gettyimages.com?

Just go to the Getty? Just go to Getty Images. You might need to subscribe, get a subscription, know a lot of stock photos and stuff guys i'm banksy over here yeah i'm banksy hey hey uh what's with uh i'm not that familiar with banksy oh he does graffiti yeah i know but like i can't think of a specific thing like oh uh you know how many what's with the stencils do you do you like stencils yeah they're pretty good it's more the pranks i like uh oh you do pranks too do lots of pranks is that why they call you pranksy banksy no but that would be a

really fun name now um i do a lot of pranks last year i put toilet or i put saran wrap on the toilet seat my mom uh sat down and pissed okay yeah uh got it all over her vagina and legs and butt and a bit of her butthole she said because i said mom did i get you with that prank she said yeah the worst part was some of some of my piss went up into my butthole careful sometimes it's cristo who sneaks in and does those pranks who's cristo cristo is the guy who just wraps stuff around things he's dead now but he was he was like, I think he was Swiss. Christo, oh. He would like wrap, he would be, he wouldn't do it like under the cover of night.

Right. Didn't he wrap all the trees in Central Park and something? He did a crazy, yeah, like a crazy flag thing in Central Park. And he has a wife, a crazy wife as well, Yoko. One time, I hid under my grandfather's bed

and then screamed while he was drifting off to sleep and he had a heart attack. But no, not to worry, he died. How much does that piece of work go for? Which?

The one that you were just saying. The prank. The screaming underneath the bed. How much does that, like how much do you sell that for? If I were to sell that prank, like for someone else to do the that prank If you would sell the concept Oh the concept of the prank

I give it away for free man There's a population problem Oh I see What about the mom peeing All over herself Take it but be prepared for your mom to say I got my own urine in my butthole I remember the next morning, just say,

I'm giggling at the table, how was your morning, mom? Well, someone made me get my own urine in my own butthole. Other than that, I've had a swell morning. She's got a really sunny disposition. Other than that one thing, I've had a swell morning.

Yeah. Any more questions for Banksy? Have you guys pulled some... No, I'm not Banksy. That's stupid. Let's edit that out. Let's edit that out.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's edit that out. Do you think we're going to get... Let's edit that out. Do you think we're going to get complaints from Banksy? No, I am Banksy. But have you guys pulled any pranks? What's going on?

Lately or in my life? Just in your fucking life. I think we used to do a segment on the show about pranks. Yeah. I used to be on the television show Scare Tactics. I did 10 episodes of that show. I told you that, didn't I? You did, yeah.

And we were talking about the, like, because it used to be, it was hosted by Tracy Morgan. It was originally hosted by Shannon Doherty. Then I think the lunatic Baldwin. I think it's Stephen Baldwin. The one that... The creationist. The lunatic creationist. Who on Big Brother, I remember he said,

if we're evolved from apes, how come there's still apes? And that was his huge argument. Whoa, whoa, whoa whoa i know wait a minute yeah i'm a baldwinist and so scare tactics is the one where it's a prank show but that an elaborate prank where people people think their lives are in danger yeah their lives are in danger they're going to die and morally i had a bit of an issue with one of them after we had done it and i thought to myself i don't know if I can continue doing this show. But you cashed the check anyway?

But it felt so good. What was it? What was it specifically? Well, we made a guy feel like he was going to – essentially, I told him, I ran this online prank show. And we make people feel like they're going to die. And then we reveal that they're not. So you're going to go in. He's a very eager guy and wants to be part of TV and production.

So we made him go inside this warehouse where I said I hired a guy to work on a sink, a plumber. And so you need to go in and pull a gun on him and say, you're going to die. And then when he turns around, you just unzip your vest and you're wearing a shirt that says, you just got boned. And then it's over. So he agrees to this excitedly. He goes into that room. And I tell him I'm going to go around and film from another location. So he goes into the room, starts screaming at this guy with the gun.

And then the guy turns around. Aaron Eves is the actor, great actor, turns around. And then he says, you just got boned. I'm joking, man. Opens his shirt. then aaron eves who's handcuffed to the sink covered in blood and dirt reveals that he's wearing the same shirt and he says you idiot he got me the same way he's gonna keep you captive then i come in block him in the room wearing a bloodied butcher's apron holding a cleaver and um then my expression changes and uh yeah we then

get him to dance for his life uh we bring out a little person mark parr uh in full bondage gear holding a dagger and uh we make this poor guy jimmy give uh our little person compliments i thought that was going in a much more nefarious direction. We told him that the friend that brought him here has already been taken care of and then he went completely white. He begged for his life.

Wow. Yeah. And you don't feel good about that? And trust me, I wanted to let it go, but my friends Adam and Dave who are directing the piece, they're laughing into the earpiece like,, don't let him go yet, don't let him go yet. And yeah, so eventually we told him, you know, your friend set you up, it's a joke. And he was not happy. He was not happy at all.

And it took him a long time to calm down and feel okay. Are people usually happy? But now, to me, that kind of prank excuses itself. If I'm looking for reasons to excuse my behavior, it excuses itself in that he was willing to do the same thing to another person. Right, right. And then we pulled the same prank on him that he was going to pull on someone else. So, in a way... Did he have to sign a waiver afterwards?

Afterwards, yeah. Did, like... Money talks. Okay. Yeah. What walks? So he gave you some money and signed the waiver? He, we, yeah, he gets money for participating, and he also, yeah, signs a waiver saying it's okay.

Huh. And in the end, I mean, you are making someone, you're relieving someone. You're not at least. Did he relieve himself? There's a good chance he did. There's a good chance he did. So, yeah, those are questionable pranks for sure. And I have a hard time justifying it morally.

But I just ignore it completely. Like a lot of things in my life, I just ignore it and say, who cares? No one died. And everything is okay. Did anybody ever have a heart attack or anything? We have a medic. There's always a medic on site. Medic world peace. Yes, they have always a medic on site and they always check. Medic world peace.

They have medic world peace on site. Yeah, they always test their heart. Yeah, they make sure that they check their blood pressure, etc., their heart rate, make sure everything's okay. And a few times the medics turned to me and were like, oh my god, you got them good.

So yeah, we had one girl run down the stairs and nearly run across the street and get hit by a car that wasn't the best but you try and take precautions and it's too much fun to rehearse for a huge prank like that and then you're in the moment like you are genuinely you have to you have to do what you have to do so yeah those, those shows to me are so fun to be a part of. I don't think I could do it. I don't have the stomach for it. A lot of people can't. Yeah. A lot of people can't, yeah.

I love it. It's really fun. Because in the end, they're okay. They really are okay. It was a prank pulled on them, and we go to extreme measures to make sure that they're scared. Yeah. We made someone believe that there was a monster running around.

Like someone was hiding under a desk because there was a half-human, half-ape monster running around. That sounds terrifying. Oh, don't tell Stephen Baldwin. That's right. Yeah, exactly. He'll throw it right out of the water. Graham, anything going on with you lately?

Yeah, what's happening, Graham? My favorite thing that's happened this week Favorite thing that's happened this week? Easily Okay, go ahead I want to hear what you were going to say I don't categorize favorite things through weeks I don't do that

No, I don't segment my weeks and say What's my favorite thing that happened to me Now that I'm sitting by myself? Well, you should. What are you doing when you're sitting by yourself? Reading. The correct. Bible. Read the Bible. See if anything's changed. If there's a new page, new ending.

No, go ahead. What happened? What's going on with you? Favorite thing of the week. This is exciting. News reports across the internet reported that Hulk Hogan has decided to shave his mustache and his hair. Oh, yeah? In order to... And his hair? He is a bald man. The fringe of hair he has. Oh, his horseshoe. The skullet, some people would call it. In order to get movie roles.

Yeah. Well, if that's what's holding you back. I think that's my favorite quote. What movie roles would you like to see him in? And also, John, why are you reading a newspaper? I'm looking for ideas. I'm looking for ideas. There's mice all over the newspaper today.

I don't know why. The squeak behind the camera. But don't worry. Don't acknowledge this. The viewers can't see it. I'm just looking for something afterwards. But I don't know why. The squeak behind the camera. But don't worry. Don't acknowledge this. The viewers can't see it. I'm just looking for something afterwards. But they can't hear it. Oh, they can hear that?

Yeah. Well, here, let me put it away. Okay. No, they didn't hear that. Now, so what movie roles would Hulk Hogan now get that he couldn't get? And also, would they be in Schindler's List? What?

I think this is basically the same conversation we just had of things we would change, but just adding Hulk Hogan to something. No, it's like, what movies could you theoretically put him in where he would be able to say Hulkamaniacs at least once and tear off his shirt at some point? But without a mustache. Yeah, like it's somehow Hollywood is not interested in his mustache anymore. Or his haircut. Hollywood was very interested for a long time. So what movie roles? I mean, Expendables 3.

Sure. Anything, if there's a Downton Abbey movie. I would make him the new James Bond. I would. And I would be behind him 100%. Even though the critics initially would be behind him 100 even though the critics initially be like wrong i'd be like you're the first american to play james bond and you can do it would he be allowed to wear his bandana and it would say 007 i would encourage all of it a

bandana that says 007 yeah uh he tears off his tuxedo a lot he always tears off his tuxedo and whenever he's in a battle, he always finds a way to climb on top of a bookshelf and then jump on top of his victim. That's his big move. I would like a martini shaken, not stirred, and also eat your vitamins and say your prayers. And he'd probably,

I'd like a martini shaken, not stirred. They'd give it to him, he'd throw it in their face and then say, now get me a beer. He would. Give me a Bud Light. I like the 007 headband that's good it's just the and you drive a monster truck yeah he would be the first james bond to uh drive a um an aston martin monster truck aston martin monster truck huge wheels regular, regular size Aston Martin. I love it.

I love it. Hulk Hogan, serious actor. Yeah. Okay. So it's just the implication that he was holding back. Yeah. When was the last movie, what was the last movie he was in? Like, Mr. Nanny? Was that him? Yeah. Suburban Commando.

These are from the late 80s. Yeah. That was when he was doing most of his big screen work. A Knollhold Bard. That was his first. That's right, yeah. Was he in a Rocky movie? No. Yes.

Mr. T. Oh, was he in that one? He was in the same one, yeah. Okay. And he was also in a movie called Santa with Muscles. No, he wasn't, right? Yeah, he was. Yeah.

And I think he was in Three Ninjas? Was that a thing? Was that a franchise? Yeah, that was a franchise. He was in one of those. He is... His skin is completely red.

Like, he burns himself with the sun. Are there any characters who, first of all, don't have mustaches but are completely red? Sebastian the crab. I see. He could

play a fire truck in Backdraft 2. Let's get to the fire truck! And it's Hulk Hogan with wheels on his hands and a siren on his head. They climb on top of him. He's got a ladder and a hose.

They hold onto his bandana as if it were the reins of a horse. And they're off to the fire. Fire truck ho! Yeah! And then sometimes the fire truck pisses. Yeah. But while they're hosing, they've got to hose down the fire. And while that's happening, he's just having a cigarette.

No, Hulk would never. Would he smoke? Well, I guess it's for the role. In this movie, he would. In this movie, he would. Could this somehow overlap with the arsonist pilot? It could. That's a one-episode pilot.

With Hulk Hogan as the fire truck. Hulk Hogan as a fire truck trying to put out the arson. Did we cast the arsonist yet? Oh, no. He has a ponytail. You could go Seagal. Oh, yeah. Oh, okay, yeah.

Seagal the arsonist. Then it begins and ends at Seagal. There are no other actors with ponytails. Actors as good. Daniel Day-Lewis would grow a ponytail. Yeah, he's very method. Johnny Depp has had a ponytail. Yeah.

Different points. Willie Nelson as the arsonist. Mike Hogan as the firetruck. Yeah. The red-headed arsonist. And who plays the fire? Oh, Sigourney Weaver. Sigourney Weaver, obviously.

Her hair, yeah. Wow. I'd watch that. Is this a family-friendly show, or is this kind of late at night? It's a family show. It's not a family-friendly show. But there's something for everyone, but they don't get along. I have a pitch for a show, and exclusive.

and exclusive. Crime-fighting undercover cops portrayed by a potato and a cob of corn. What are they undercover as? The show's called Starchy and Husk. Boo. Why? It sounds like another show. Like what?

Cagney and Lacey. Yeah, that's where I got the idea, actually. Let's go to Overheard. Overheard. Overheard. A segment in which if you're a person who, you know, gad about or does anything but hibernate, you get out with the people, you're going to overhear things hilarious and oversee things hilarious, and then you can report them to us here at the podcast.

We like to do our own first, and then we like to read things that have been sent in by people. Now, we like to usually have the guest go first, but you, John, said that you don't have one. I don't have an overhear. Well, what you said was, fuck you guys. I the guest go first, but you, John, said that you don't have one. I don't have an overheard. Well, what you said was, fuck you guys. I did not say that, David. I did not say that. That is revisionist history.

And then you said Stalin is a mighty leader. I did say that. And never killed anyone. And I defy anyone. Well, okay, he killed a few people. Okay. But it was mostly through starvation. Do you think?

If you want to break a few eggs, you've got to make an omelette. Yeah, yeah. You want to work. Hey, look it. You want to make a thing and do it. Okay, look it. I don't have to reach way back for an overseen. That is true.

Oversaw, yeah. When I was in New York once, a very busy corner. I can't remember where it was, but Manhattan near the Pennsylvania Hotel. Okay. And a huge, busy street corner. This is where all the subways empty out and people crossing the road. So this is at a time where the lights are now green for cars to drive north and south, uh,

North and South, but a guy in full like briefcase and, uh, and, uh, suit decides to start walking across the street. All cars are honking. He stops in the middle of the road, holds up his middle finger to no one in particular,

and does a full 360. The Jack McDowell. And then just keeps walking. He was almost, yeah, it was almost a falling down moment. And to me, and I put a smile on my face. face i just like what happened in this guy's life to drive him to this point but yeah stopped middle of the road and gave the finger to no one in particular

but everyone in but everyone yeah and then kept walking and horns were just honking and there's probably three or four of us on the sidewalk just laughing just loving it but which was yeah he was probably his brain was melting into into nothing but yeah there was a new york yankees pitcher uh jack mcdowell who who i was wondering i was gonna ask who was jack the crowd booed him uh and like i guess he was getting he was done pitching for the game right and he just put his middle finger up and waved it over his head 60 000 people000 people. I love it. Yeah. I love it.

Yeah, because it's very rare that anybody will have the opportunity to give the finger to that many people at one time. So you really, while you have the ability, you can seize on it. I think news anchors should really take advantage of it. With their final sign-off? Yeah. I mean, you're not doing it in person, but through the power of you really can i've got another one for you okay always announce the last words of a serial killer uh-huh every time they're executed they always say his last words were uh yeah so there's a great opportunity if you're willing to put a few bodies in the dirt you know you're

guaranteed not too far you're guaranteed to have all anchors across the world say his last words were. Just a swinging middle finger. And I've thought of this before. If it were me, I would force Glenn Beck to say, Hi, I'm Glenn Beck, serial killer John Doerr's last words were, Hi, I'm Glenn Beck, and I'm a Mormon faggot. That would be potentially one although if you've got a lot of things you want to do with your life if i was thanks if i were a serial killer glenn beck probably wouldn't be saying it yeah he's not

really a reporter yeah i'm glenn belling live at the scene and no no offense to any Mormons out there. I just know collectively a large group of them were not happy, or did the best they could to make sure that Proposition 8 did not go through, and they really campaigned and made sure that

gay marriage was illegal. I heard it was the Mexicans. You did hear that, David? Did you hear that? I heard that. I heard it was the Mexicans. You did hear that, David? Did you hear that? I heard that, I don't know, Glenn Beck? Probably. Dave, do you have an overheard? Here's what's up with me.

My overheard is, well, it's something a guy actually said to me, but it took me so off guard that I had to get him to repeat it. I explained on the last episode that I did some repairs, some electrical cable repairs around the house. You made the electricity happen again. Yeah, I went to what used to be known as Radio Shack, but is now known as The Source by Circuit City. That's a catchier name. Yeah.

TheSourceCC.com. I went and I bought some cable stuff I bought like coaxial cable and a splitter and this tool to screw it in and the little tips I forget what they're called

little plug in tips and as I'm checking out the guy goes can I interest you in a phone? And I was like, what? Oh, can I interest you in a telephone? That was it.

Yeah. It was a real... It was great, yeah. It was just a real big upsell. Yeah, yeah. That's what his manager is like. Yeah. We gotta move these phones.

We've got all these Garfield phones that never sold. Yeah. Well, who should I sell them to? Well, if anyone's coming in with coax cable, drive them first. Yeah. Yeah, there's no need. Yeah, yeah.

That's like, give an example of what that would be like. Maybe that's my joke. Oh, it would be like... It's like going in to buy a hamburger, and someone's saying, can I interest you in a phone? Yeah. Yeah. Can I interest you in something?

Oh, four times the price of what you're buying right now. Graham, go. Can I interest you in a phone? Hold on, let me call my wife on my cellular phone. Would you like some coaxial candy? Honey, where am I calling you?

Oh, you're on your cell phone? I'm calling you from my cell phone. Do we need a cell phone? Do we need any coax? He never said cell phone though. He just said, do you need a phone? Oh! No, but then he started asking me about my rate plan. Like, what do you pay a month? Like, what? I'm not gonna talk to you. He used to make

you fill out your name and address at Radio Shack. Oh, yeah. That was weird. An address. Oh, yeah. That was weird. And address. Oh, they're probably wanting to see who's coming from where to shop. And who's making a bomb. If this show requires... Yeah, if you're making a pipe bomb. If you have a beard, they'll ask you.

Yeah. But no, I think it's, yeah, they do that to see where their clientele is coming from. So if they do require a business in this location, or if they should open one closer to another location. I think that's what they do. There's a lot of places in the States when we sometimes go down to Seattle and they'll ask you your zip code. Yes, yes.

And I'll say I'm Canadian. But it's kind of also like for what? Like I'm buying a thing. Do you ever, as a Canadian, when you're online and you're looking for something, like you're not going to buy anything, but for whatever reason the website needs your zip code, do you just put in 90210? Oh, if you're shopping for something in the States?

Well, not even shopping, but the website just wants this information. It won't give you what you want unless you put in your zip code. Oh, okay. I thought you were talking about it wants to mail something to you. You're like, oh, I'll put this in. Hey, how come I never got it? I put my street address, just the wrong postal code. I always think it is funny when you do meet people, and your zip code, like 90210, you always do a little bit of a giggle.

Yeah, you really do. Is it the most famous zip code? Oh,210, you always do a little bit of a giggle. Yeah, you really do. Is it the most famous zip code? Oh, probably. I would imagine. What's the address that changes all the rules? Oh, 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Murder at 1600. Where's the Snipes film?

Dennis Miller. He was in that, wasn't he? Yes, he was. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, overheards. What? No, it's Graham's turn. Yeah graham's turn overheard what did what

did you overhear graham i think that the lead-in to this because two nerdy guys uh on the train platform and i'm fairly sure they were talking about battle star galactica but i don't really know i've never seen that show but the you'd love it by the way That and Doctor Who I hear that about Saga a lot People love it These guys I think especially Because the tidbit I heard was I feel like I need Edward James Olmos

To tell me what is right And what is wrong I used to say that In the 80s When Miami Vice was on You were a big Selena fan wasn't he the dad in Selena? oh yeah

that's the only other thing I know of was he in Stand and Deliver? ah Stand and Deliver yes but did the kid have a lot of acne? because if he had a lot of acne I gotta hear from Edward James Olmos yeah but Edward James Olmos is his moral compass.

Yeah. Or Brian Adams. Sure. Seal. Brian Adams. Yeah. Let's do our favorite. Let's do an episode of our favorite acne scarred people.

Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, I think those are my top. Acne scarred celebrities. Hey, guys. Speaking of celebrities, I forgot to do this. Go on. It's time for celebrity birthdays Every week on the show we do a segment

Where we take a time out What's this wee business? And we recognize celebrities Turning one year older today We still haven't received any feedback on this segment Which is odd because there's so many ways you can reach us Yeah, well no, we're not soliciting it No, but we're very easy to reach So that's what makes it so odd I don't want people to think We're not soliciting it. No, but we're very easy to reach, so that's what makes it so odd.

I don't want people to think that we're soliciting it, because we are absolutely not. No, but if you wanted to say how much you like the bit or dislike it, you certainly can. Yeah, but why would you? Is it so celebrities the day we record this? We are recording this Saturday, January 14th, Bastille Day. Yes, yesterday was Friday the 13th, by the way. It was. Bastille Day. Oh, bonjour.

Bastille to you. Actor Jason Bateman turns 43 today. Great job, Jason. 43 years old. Still bringing the thunder. Star of Hancock. Yes, also turning 43 today. Gum-chewing musician Dave Grohl. Oh! Chews a lot of gum.

And speaking of celebrities with oral fixations... You'll edit that together, right? Lip-licking rapper and actor LL Cool J turns 44 today. Oh, mama said knock you birthday! And the answer to this week's trivia question, this man was named the greatest actor of all time. Carl Weathers is 64 today. What was the body that voted on that?

The Rocky 1 and 2 and 3 and Predator fan club. They voted him greatest actor of all time. And Rocky 4. Of all time, yeah. Who do you think him greatest actor of all time. And Rocky IV. Of all time, yeah. Who do you think the greatest actor of all time is? If you had your choice. Okay. Edward James Olsen.

Edward James Norton. Greatest actor of all time. All time. All time. Well, I don't... No one was good at acting in black and white movies. Until... Yeah, okay.

I'll give you that. Audiences were dumb. Except Schindler's List was in black and white. We Until, yeah, okay. I'll give you that. Audiences were dumb. Except Schindler's List was in black and white. We've got to remember that. Yeah. Kevin Costner. Any movies that had singing and dancing, that doesn't count.

That's cheating. They don't count, yeah. It's not acting. Yeah, and it tricks the audience into thinking you're a good actor, but you're really just a wonderful dancer. Yes. So Fred Astaire's out. Fred Astaire's out actor, but you're really just a wonderful dancer. Yes. So Fred Astaire's out.

Fred Astaire's out of the closet. He's more of a dancer. Did Kenny Rogers do any acting? Because I feel like he would be pretty good. You can't pick your favorite actor by starting the sentence. Did Kenny Rogers do any acting? I think he did, though. He was in The Gambler.

He must have been. I bet he's in the song The Gambler. He played narrator. He did some music videos and there's some acting in those. Oh yeah, I would say probably the greatest actors have been in music videos. Alicia Silverstone. Yeah. Alicia Silverstone, Dave Grohl,

Edward James Olmos, I think, was in a Selena music video. These are the big three. Yeah, these are the three that keep coming up over and over again. LL Cool J. Jason Bateman. It's weird how so many of the best actors

have their birthday today. Yeah. Jason Biggs. I'm going to go with, who's your favorite, who's the best actor? Instead of of all time, from the American Pie cast.

From the American Pie cast. From the American Pie cast. Well, that's easy. It's Eugene Levy. It doesn't get better. Because if you've seen his work in Armed and Dangerous, then you've seen the finest acting ever. Is that him and Samuel L. Jackson? No, that was the man. No, that is him and John Candy.

You're way off. Way off by decades. Samuel L. Jackson is our generation's John Candy. Yeah, that's true. Because he was in the remake of Uncle Buck, right? Yeah, and his sketch comedy troupe before he made it was also very good. In addition to overheards that we have, we also get overheards written in. And if you would like to write us, only to send overheards uh stop podcasting

yourself at gmail.com now this uh first one comes from abraham k uh clinkin yeah abraham clinkin um now here's uh just a uh do you guys have you ever watched spongebob squarepants i've watched of it no you've watched of it i know of You've watched of it? I know of it. The characters live, the name of the... They live in a pineapple under the sea. In a town called Bikini Bottom is the name of the town. So, I've been there. Right? Yeah.

And this was a... It's clammy. Yeah. No, I don't mean it in a gross way. I mean like... I mean it stinks like vagina. No, no, no. Oh, no, what?

Just like, you know, your skin after you take off a bathing suit. It's very clammy. Once I didn't shower for 12 days. Is that true? And I could have showered every day. Is that true? Yep. Yeah?

What did that smell like? Like a SpongeBob SquarePants episode. A SquarePants Bob shower. No, it smelled bad, just to be honest. Yeah, I imagine it would. If you can shower you should shower but yeah i wasn't depressed i was just not showering i you were lazy you were an eight-year-old kid this was three months ago i was i was a full grown adult scare tactic yeah it was and i just

did not shower i had other i did not like i had other things to do i knew i only had to run a couple errands and i got lazy when i got home i had some time time off. I didn't shower and big deal. It was 12 days without showering. It is a big deal. I brushed my teeth. I clipped my toenails. I couldn't will myself to get into the shower. Sometimes that's just a little too much. Maybe I was depressed. I was a little bit down. I may have been a little

depressed thinking about things. I think you're going to be okay. You showered today? I feel good. I showered. Yeah, I'm good. I showered today. Yeah. Mind you, it was quite late, but I did shower. I did get in the shower. Well, happy birthday. Thank you. Happy birthday, Jason.

12 days is a long time. Yeah. So this is a... Except for Christmas. Sure. Perfect amount of time for Christmas. This is a toy that somebody saw at a Target. I think it was probably, I mean, if you took a microscope to, like, some of my, there was

probably, you know, you probably, if you were able, if you were to take a microscope and kind of, you know, analyze what was going on in my crotch whole region. Would we find your penis? Probably not. To microscope. You'd look past the penis. You'd look past the penis. You'd see it on the way by through the microscope. But you would probably see what it looked like five minutes after the

Big Bang. That's what you would have seen. Just like the beginning of life. Primordial soup. There you go. Okay, go ahead. But do shower.

Yeah, you've got to. You know why? Because we're trying to live in a society. And it's not nice to other people. I mean, even at the bank. Like, I could smell my crotch at the bank. That's disgusting. Yeah. Oh, completely.

That's why I bring it up. That's why I bring it up. Don't be disgusting. Shower. Yeah. Don't. You should. Use your power.

Switch to a credit union. Yeah. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah. We can do that because of Occupy. Yeah. Or Bank Online. Occupy a bar of soap.

Am I right? Okay. I feel like I'm distracted from this. But yeah, go ahead. I know what's coming, though. I'm going to start talking, man. He's going to pull the old... I guarantee you I will not. All right.

He's a man of his word, Graham. Yeah, always has been. Always has been. Always will be, right? Your word is your bond. I'm not even going to say anything. Just get to it. It smells.

Yeah, there we go. Yeah. Smells a lot. It's pretty simple stuff. I mean, you learn that at a young age. You shower. Hygiene. It's not like, yeah.

But it's weird how you become an adult. How old were you when you first showered? When I first had a shower? Good question. When did you make the switch from baths to showers? I think I fantasized about the idea of being in the shower. Like, growing up, being an adult, I wanted to shower. Did your parents not let you?

When I was five years old, I remember being in the shower and putting my head back, and I accidentally waterboarded myself. And then I confessed the things I didn't do. Oh, man. Yeah, it was awful. A five-year-old. I said I killed Kennedy. My parents were like, you're taking a bath for another few years. Kennedy, my parents were like, you're taking a bath for another few years.

So don't have your kids shower at a young age because they will waterboard themselves and confess the crimes that they did not do. Yeah. And every bathroom is tapped now, literally. I said I killed Kennedy. They said, there's no way you could have killed Kennedy. I said- You're talking about a different Kennedy. Kennedy from MTV.

Yeah. I'm talking about Megan Kennedy. She's in my grade four class and no one's seen her body for five weeks. Yeah. I'm telling you, I killed her. And they're like, no, no. Yeah, I'm talking about Megan Kennedy. She's in my grade 4 class and no one's seen her body for 5 weeks. I'm telling you, I killed her. And they're like, no, no. No, no. Mom and dad, I killed her. They're like, did you just take a shower by yourself? Yes.

We can't trust you. These tactics, you'll say anything. Okay, go ahead. Go ahead. I was at a Target the other day. the other thing about yeah there we go go ahead

and saw a box that had been left by the register uh it's a Spongebob square pants themed toy razor for uh pretending to shave

or suicide uh and there's a picture of a kid with foam on his or her face the name of the product

is bikini bottom groom and go oh yeah uh so surely that must have gotten in a meeting and how did that yeah you're right so but bikini bottom is where they live that's where they live on the show so it would be like saying uh you know uh melonville groom and girl like if that's where they live. Like a Brazil, some kind of group. It's wonderful. If there were Brazil themed toys from the movie Brazil.

It's amazing what gets passed. Well, in Phineas and Ferb, they live in puberty lane. Puberty lane. Puberty grooming. I also have an overheard from

Anne-Marie. Anne-Marie. This happened in downtown... I didn't say where they're from. Downtown somewhere. Downtown anywhere USA. This is during the holiday season. With all the holiday parades and nonsense in the city.

There's a bunch of crazy people all over the place. I was walking my dog past this large family and first saw two women in the center of a pack of little girls. There were at least eight children, and they were all probably under the age of ten, and they were being led in a chant by the two women. I specifically recall it going like this. We are the girl family. We are the girl family. Girl family. Girl family.

Then I noticed one little boy, not chanting, standing in the back of the group, just looking at the ground uncomfortably. That is funny. Yeah. He got borned into the girl family. Yeah. Just no comment. That is just pure Yeah. Yeah. He got, he got borned into the girl family. Yeah. Yeah.

Just no comment. That is just pure fun. Poor kid. Oh, who cares? He'll be fine. Do you think? I think so.

Yeah. I think he grew up around a lot of, a lot of women. He's going to be enlightened. Yeah. He's going to respect women. He's going to, or the opposite. Actually.

Now I think of a gram could be right here. Yeah. He may resent these women for leaving them out of the reindeer games yeah he's gonna be like uh adam sandler in punch drunk love what was his story in that movie he was the youngest uh uh boy in a family of girls and then he like even as an adult even as a successful grown man uh he's It always reverted to him just being, them all yelling at him. Yeah. There's going to be a lot of boys around that house. Also, happy birthday to Emily

Watson from that movie. She's 45 today. I didn't include her in the list because I didn't think this would come up. Is that for real? Very interesting how these things have come full circle. Is there a greater power is the question. That's really what we're getting at now is you know you started to talk about something

decided to eliminate something else a related topic came up which could have you know lent itself to what you were going to say earlier there's a greater power at work here franksy banksy look don't you do what you want it's your show But I disagree with your approach to a lot of things David You don't think Banksy is the greater power at work Pulling pranks on everyone No I'm talking about on a spiritual level I think that there's

There's something going on watching over us at all times Like a Banksy Giving us hints Do you think that it's a friendly ghost Giving us hints Letting us oh there's a suggestion we should follow it do certain people need more hints

because they're not good at reading winks the universe is winking at me I got a wink last night I heard about it it was a confusing wink we don't know what kind of wink it was it may have been a do you want to come do cocaine with us wink? Or... Followed by a threesome. Yeah. Or

do you want to have sex with me and my husband? Mm-hmm. And I said, how come we can't do all of it? Yeah. Wink, wink. And I double winked, and she thought I had something in my eye, but I was really going, no. Have you ever tried to wink at two people at once who are a little bit further apart than your eyes?

It's impossible. Even if they're right as close as your eyes? You can do that. But if they're kind of standing a little bit farther away, you've got to try and put your eyes to one side and then wink. We're not chameleons. That's the game, right? No. Well, chameleons.

Chameleons have those eyes, don't they? They go crazy off to the left and right? Oh, okay. I'd go fish. That would dumb it down for people like me. yeah hugs walleye uh this last one's from krista c thank god hey last one thank god there's still phone calls uh i was walking past a bar and heard a guy say this to his friend yeah she's like their better ringo star pause yeah that's a good like their better Ringo Starr. Pause. Yeah, that's a good analogy. Their better Ringo Starr.

Yeah. Get it? Really puts it perfectly. Ringo Starr, like the fourth most popular Beatle. Well, I don't know. I like Ringo. What about Pete Best? Okay, Ringo.

What about Stuart Sutcliffe? Oh, gone too soon. Yeah. He wasingo. What about Stuart Sutcliffe? Oh, gone too soon. He was very handsome, that Stuart Sutcliffe. I know, imagine the band the Beatles could have been with Stuart Sutcliffe. If they had kept the good-looking guy, it would have been like, the girls would have been screaming for them. It would have been Stuart Sutcliffe and his Beatles, probably. Instead of doing dumb paintings. Is that what he did?

Dumb paintings? He dropped out of the Beatles. He got kicked out of the Beatles for doing too many dumb paintings. Is that true? And he had an aneurysm. A brain aneurysm. And he died. Oh, he had a brain one?

I think. In addition to overheards that get written, we also take phone calls. If you would like to call us, our phone number is 206-339-8328. That's 206-339-8328. That's 206-339... Teat. Oh, right. It's not too late for a Beatles reunion.

You're right. We've got two surviving members. Yeah. We've got John Lennon's son, Sean Lennon. So you'd keep... Okay, so you'd go Sean Lennon. Not Julian. It's... Oh... Julian has a better voice. Okay. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, okay, so you'd go Sean Lennon. Not Julian. What about Julian? It's, oh, yeah. Julian has a better voice. Okay.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, easy, bud. Who would fill in for George Harrison? I saw Sean Lennon. Danny Harrison? I saw Sean Lennon perform very recently and eerily reminiscent of his father. Yeah. Who I saw perform when I was, no, I didn't, but yeah. You had a dream where he came to you on I didn't. Yeah. He had a dream. But Sean Lennon is a wonderful guy.

So yeah, match the Beatles up with another super group. Oh, so take the remaining people from the Traveling Wilburys and substitute them into the Beatles? Yeah. The remaining members of Boston?

The Traveling Wilbeetles. Not bad. The Travelling Will Beatles. Not bad. Pretty good. Yeah. The Beetling Trav-berries. There are some dead Wilburys. Yep. Who are the dead Wilburys?

Ex-Beatle George Harrison. Oh, George Harrison. Roy Orbison. Orbison, right. And so we've got... Tom Petty. Tom Petty. Was Bob Dylan in the Wilburys?

Bob Dylan's dead as well, yeah. No, but was Bob Dylan part of the Wilburys? Yes. And then there was another guy. Jeff Lynn. Jeff Lynn. It was an ELO or ELP or... No, he was on ELP.

He was on ELP. Phone calls. Hey, Dave and Graham and lovely guest who might be one of your lovely ladies, because they're my favorite of your guests. I haven't overheard from you guys. Fuck you. They're my favorite of your guests. I have an overheard for you guys.

Fuck you. I was just sitting in a cafe next to two gentlemen who were playing a very strange game of Scrabble and having a really loud and kind of obnoxious conversation next to us. It kind of sounded like a first date, but we weren't sure. They didn't really look like they would be dating each other. But anyways, there's lots of overheards in the conversation, but the best one was one of the guys was telling a story about being in the car with his grandfather,

who pulled into a roundabout and missed the turnoff, and instead of just going around again, put the car into reverse and backed up to turn off at his turn from the roundabout, and the other guy laughed and was like, ugh, people love reverse

they do of the of the possible choices one of the best my favorite what is a strange game of scrabble they were playing a very strange game of scrabble strip scrabble oh yeah so is that when you get a triple word score they have to they're using checker pieces instead of letters yeah russian scrabble where you kill yourself every move. Oh, Russian Rue Scrabble? Russian Rue Scrabble. Or it's just Scrabble with all blank tiles. Kangaroo Scrabble?

It made me think of an overheard going back two years ago. This is my sister and my mom. Last time my parents came down to visit me in Los Angeles, my sister, my mom and dad. Was there any arsons back then? No, no, no, no, no. So they're clear. They're clear. But my mom and dad and my sister went on one of those tours of Hollywood, like to go see the homes of people, et cetera.

And so apparently, this is how my sister retells the story, the bus tour was going by Bel Air. And they stopped in front of a home. And the announcer said on the tour, now some of you may recognize this home from the opening sequence of the sitcom Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And then my mom turned to my sister and said, ooh, Eddie Murphy. And my sister laughed hysterically

and yeah, cannot stop laughing about it. So, yeah, careful mom. Ooh, Eddie Murphy with such conviction. That's fine. They should do tours of the arsonist spots. All the great burned down places. It'll happen. Will it?

Don't you think? People are fascinated by that kind of morbid... Yeah. Yeah. If they can do ghost tours... Nobody died, though, in the arsonist. Not that I know of. I don't think anyone was killed. No, but...

I thought Tom Petty was killed. I mean, emotionally... Oh, Tom Petty was killed. Oh, Tom Petty was killed by the arsonist? Yeah. Oh. He was running down a dream until someone came and killed him. I was going to say, learning to fly, yeah.

Do it, Dave, do it. Here comes the guitar. Keep going. It was a beautiful day, sun beat down. Keep going. I had the radio on, we were flying. Next phone call. That was the most earnest.

No, keep going. Don't stop. I wanted him to play guitar. I love when music breaks out. Some people hate the guitar guy at parties. I love him. Guess why? Because he's mean!

How come no one wants to hear No Rain? Hey, stop podcasting yourself. I just called in because I wanted to call in an overheard. The other day, while working my job at Panera Bread, I heard someone exclaim very loudly, my life just isn't the same without Regis. Well, probably. Now, was he

talking about Regis Philbin? Or Saint Regis? Who's Saint Regis? I don't know. Patriot Saint of talk shows. Of morning talk shows. I have noticed that now that it's just live with Kelly, she has moved over.

She's switched seats into Regis' old seat. I have not seen the show since. Is he gone? Yeah, he was murdered. Yeah, he is. I usually only catch that show by accident. Like if I happen to be up and it's on. Yeah.

I've never, yeah. She has guest hosts now. So they haven't found someone for her to be with yet? No. My vote is... She has guest hosts now. So they haven't found someone for her to be with yet? No. My vote is for Kermit the Frog. Oh, that'd be amazing. He's a perfect counterpoint to what she does. I want them to

hire Screech. Amazing. I would tune in. But you want Dustin Diamond to play Screech. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But not Screech from Saved by the Bell. Screech from Saved by the Bell, the new class. Where's the principal? Yeah, he's the principal's assistant.

Co-hosting a show. I think it should be an animal every episode. Like either a gazelle would be amazing. She's saying, well, last night I went out for dinner and it's just destroying the set. It's just eating the newspaper that she brought in. I don't know anything about gazelles. At the end you say, all I know is that a tiger will take one down. Yeah, they are prey.

They're like pawns in their game. And then one week you do a dog. You do a dog. I think it would be great. What kind of dog? Who doesn't like any kind? I'd start with a retriever. Yeah, sure.

Yeah. Golden? That's too much blonde hair on the screen. You're right. I wasn't thinking about that part. Don't retrieve that remote can be his catchphrase. Oh, no, wait. He doesn't talk. He's not a talking dog.

No, he'd go, Arr! Arr! Arr! Arr! Arr! Arr! Arr!

And then she'd... David? There we go. It was a beautiful day, sunbeam. Bark Petty. Final phone call. Bark Petty? Hey, Dave and Graham and guests.

This is Andy from Toledo, Ohio, United States of America. I'm calling in with an overseen. I was just behind a car, a truck, that had a bumper sticker that said, My truck is made with wrenches, not chopsticks. Whoa. Wow. Whoa. Where did he say he was from?

Toledo, Ohio. Right. Wow. Yeah. What? What? What is the implication? I know that it's I Buy American.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. But they put together everything with chopsticks? He doesn't think that. He might. He might. Yeah, he might. I think that.

Like every... Mm-hmm. Like, okay. So, the big Asian car companies are Japanese and Korean. Mm-hmm. But most Asian manufacturing is done in China. Like, does it matter? Cars, iPods, everything over there is done with chopsticks?

I would imagine, yeah. Or just tiny little hands. Oh, it's because of the small detail work. Well, I'm offended. I mean, the bumper sticker itself is definitely offended. I mean, if you're even going to attempt something like that, you have to say it properly. I mean, yeah, my car was built with wrenches, not Chinese-er twigs. We're going back to podcast number one.

Podcast number one. It feels like to do... Were you hoping that there would be a Chinese or Twig? It feels like the very first time. Journey? Feels like the first time. I don't think it's Journey. And then Dave picks up the guitar.

There's... Yeah. Yeah, people are weird. Bad company or something. People are just weird. Yeah. Yeah. Chinese or Twigs.

Thanks for bringing that back you're welcome guys but that's weird yeah bumper stickers and that kind of thing there's so much like arrogance and not there's arrogance here in canada as well but there's like so much overt like uh american arrogance like people love putting bumper stickers on their cars like the jesus fish is everywhere well it's like i would like to pull up next to the jesus fish people just to kind of look and see. Like, okay, there you go. There he is.

Just curious. There's that guy. Just curious to see. I'm installing a... Go on. A stream in my garage so Jesus fish can go through. Ah. To attract the bears.

Attract Jesus bears. They're preaching. What is the company that uses the Detroit... Like, all the... It uses the Detroit like all the it has the Eminem song oh yeah it's Chrysler isn't it it's one of them but all their stuff is assembled in

I think it's Plymouth all their stuff is assembled in Windsor it's not made in Detroit not all of everything yeah but it's not like they're trying to sell it as if we make our cars here in Detroit. Okay, well then write the bumper sticker for American

versus Canada. Oh, yeah. My car was made by wrenches, not moose knuckles. Not antlers. Yeah, not antlers. Now, John Doerr. The person who built my car was wearing a Green Bay Packers helmet, not a fucking hockey helmet, eh? They probably wouldn't say hey at the end of it.

Well, it depends. Not on the sticker. Probably wouldn't say any of that. I'll say anything. Yeah. Okay, now you were about to say something, and you said, now, John. And I feel like you were about to direct something towards me. Yeah, I was going to say, we're going to wrap up the show.

We can do that, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah, let's wrap it up. Or we could talk some more and then edit out some of the crap from earlier. Oh, you think? I don't think there was any crap. I'm just saying. I feel like it was all killer.

I feel like it was fun. Yeah. It was fun. We had a pleasant chat. Now, where can people find, like, what are you working on right now that you would like to direct people towards? I have no idea. Go to Pearl Jam's website.

Yeah. If you haven't seen 20 yet, it's great. Yeah. Did you watch 20? No, I watched it. Have you seen it? I liked it. Did you enjoy it?

Yeah, I'm not a Pearl Jam fan, but I really enjoyed it. Yeah, I was never a huge Pearl Jam fan. I was into my Tragically Hip at the time. Yeah, there it is. Tragically Hip. But yeah, I thought it was a great documentary. I have really nothing on the go. Just go live your lives and you're going to die one day, so you better get to it.

Yeah, go to PearlJam.com? No, PearlJam.net is my new website. I used JohnDoor.com. I wasn't getting very many hits, so I changed it to PearlJam.net. That makes good sense. That's good marketing. Yeah, getting a lot of great marketing. But other than that, no, just, yeah, I have nothing to promote.

All right. I noticed you looked down at the newspaper as if something might jump out at you to promote. A personal ad. Like, go see Black Swan. And remember to vote. And, yeah. Now, Dave, you and I. If I get a home, by the way, you guys, will you come down and podcast from the home?

Of course. Are you asking us or the listeners? I'm asking you guys. Sure. I'm not going to ask the listeners. Of course we would. Okay, yeah. Like, we'll do an inaugural like uh 7 000 feet

of altitude uh podcast we'll break the champagne bottle is that where it's higher than where you podcasted from okay oh so you don't mean on the plane a very low flying plane we could do that no i'm thinking we do it at uh at uh my house if it all goes. We'll join the 7,000-foot club. Great. Dave and I are going to be in Toronto in March. At the Comedy Bar, March 3rd, we're going to do an early show. It's going to be stand-up comedy. And the late show will be a live podcast recording.

We're in the midst of confirming, double-confirming our guests. Some of the biggest celebrities in Toronto. Your mayor. Don Cherry. You're not getting Don Cherry. We're getting Don Cherry. Potentially Don Cherry.

This is a lie. Cheetah Power Surge is going to be there. You could get Cheetah Power Surge. Are you trying to? We're going to have Peter Puck. We're going to get Ben Johnson. Get Ben Johnson? Ben Johnson's going to be there. Get Ben Johnson.

Yeah. Yeah. He's going to race a horse. We're going to get Hal Johnson as well. Joanne McLeod. Joanne McLeod has committed. I cheat every time. Joanne McLeod, who's that?

They do the body break. Hal Johnson's mistress. Oh, Hal Johnson. Right. Okay. Yeah. Did you know that they were just having an affair the whole time and his wife didn't know anything about it? Is that true?

No. Oh. I think they were married. Oh, we're going to get Rick the Temp. Oh, okay. Rick the Temp's going to be there. Rick the Perm is his new name. He's now, yeah.

Rick, he's doing ET Canada. Yeah. And he's permanent. So he's Rick the Perm. Yeah. And George Trombo-Lophless has committed. Oh, yeah. George Trombo.

George would gladly do your podcast. Did he commit to doing it? Yeah, he's committed the Perm. Yeah. And George Trombo-Lophlis has committed. Oh, yeah, Trombo. George would gladly do your podcast. Did he commit to doing it? Yeah, he's committed. Okay, great. Good. The CN Tower. Yeah, it's going to work. The CN Tower committee.

Yeah, we're going to get the whole staff. Yeah, we're going to get the... Ernie Witt. Yeah. Don't even joke. The whole cast of Degrassi will be there. Spike's going to have a baby on camera the king the king of kensington al waxman he is dead but he can no no well he's gonna be there

in spirit yeah he's committed okay good good good so you you weegee board yeah we don't communicate through a weegee board yeah we've communicated with his agent who's also dead. Yeah. His agent, Luigi board. Yeah. Luigi board. That's a good name for an agent for dead people. Yeah.

Luigi board. I know this Italian guy who talks to dead Luigi board. Yeah. So yeah, check that out, comedybar.ca

and if you want to go to maximumfun.org Oh, by the way, tickets for that will go until about four weeks before the show. I'm going to buy them all up and then sit there by myself.

That's fine. That's fine. We get paid either way. Okay. And go to MaximumFun.org to check out the blog recaps from this week's show. Photos and videos

backing up what we've talked about. What will be in the blog recap this time? That Tom Petty song? Yes. I mean, basically. Running down a dream. All the weird Toronto celebrities we just mentioned. Yeah.

Hulk Hogan as a fire truck, probably, will appear somewhere online. Is Ernie Witt, where does Ernie Witt live? He's an American. Does he live in the States? Ernie Witt was a baseball player, yeah. No, I know, yeah. I assume he's probably scouting for the Jays. Scouting for the Jays somewhere in the minor league system.

All right. Gary Carter has cancer, or did. Oh, that's a shame. Yeah. Good night, everyone. Yeah. Or good morning. I don't know when you're listening to this,

but either way, Gary Carter may still or did have cancer. Fair enough. Well, thanks everybody for tuning in. If you like the show, tell your friends. If you want to get a hold of us, it's Stop Podcasting Yourself at gmail.com or 206-339-8328. Come on back next week for another...

What would you say? Tom Petty Heavy or Tom Petty Light? Dave was also playing an Epiphone guitar in today's episode. Epiphone guitars available at the Guitar Center. Thanks for joining us. Join us next week on Stop Podcasting. Graham was wearing striped socks.

Striped socks. You can get them at the store. Yep. Hi, I'm Justin McElroy. I'm Travis McElroy. I'm Griffin McElroy. We're three brothers. It's not a coincidence. We have a show.

It's called My Brother, My Brother and Me. It's an advice show for the modern era. Sometimes we ask take questions from the Yahoo answer service. Hey, guys, how many push-ups does it take to look like a werewolf? That's a fine question, Griffin. We'll answer that one and so much more, including questions from readers about love and navigating the waters of society.

Subscribe on iTunes or get it online at MaximumFun.org. We're brothers. We're experts. And we're brothers. We're experts. And we're sorry.