Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 272 - Sean Proudlove

Episode Date: June 3, 2013

Comedian Sean Proudlove returns to talk taxi stories, big salads, and accidental extra work.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello, everybody, and welcome to episode number 272 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who has clear eyes and a golden heart, Mr. Dave Shumka. It was full heart. It should be full heart. Oh, sorry. But in your case, golden heart.

Yeah, I do. I have a heart of gold. You're a hooker with a heart of gold. You don't really meet a lot of people with hearts of gold who aren't hookers it's the only business where it stands out that you have a heart of gold if you're a doctor with a heart of gold

probably a lot of those hookers are cruel oh boy are they they're like hey where's my money guy? No. It is the awkwardest part of the extraction. It's like. The extraction?

Extracting their heart of gold? It was. That's really what I'm trying to mime. It's the only reason to really kill a hooker is to actually take her heart of gold. Yeah. Get cash for it. Yeah. It's because of Pretty Woman that a lot of urban myths have been spread about this heart of gold. It's like of Pretty Woman that a lot of urban myths have been spread about this heart of gold.

It's like the leprechauns. They don't actually have a pot of gold. No, they have lucky charms. Yeah, like when you get to the end of the rainbow, friendship is the pot of gold. Oh, boy. Yeah. It was inside us the whole time. Yeah, yeah. Just like the heart of gold. Our guest today, very funny comedian,

lived in Vancouver, now makes Victoria, BC his home. And we're very glad to have him back, Mr. Sean Proudlove. Hello, everybody. Hello, everybody in radio. Thanks for emailing in to get me back, everyone. That's been fantastic. The support is overwhelming. He was last on 261 episodes ago.

Yeah, so you better have some tall tales to tell, my friend. There's a lot of people from the first dozen episodes who then just disappeared from the show. Yeah. Well, there's also people that don't even do comedy. Oh, yeah. We've got a record of when they did comedy. Yeah. And they don't even do it anymore.

You're A.J. McKenzie's. You're Mark McGuckin's. Right. You're Sean Bradlow's. Shall we get to Noah? Absolutely. So, Sean, you live in Victoria. You moonlight as a cab driver.

Or daylight. Yeah, it's most all the light. Yes, it is my main form of income. But, like, you did that before you got into staff. I did. And then I vowed never to do it again, that it was the worst job ever. But good for material, no? Yeah, I always said it would have been good because you get a bunch, you know, four people in your car at a time.

And they don't know you and you can be funny and you can tell jokes, the same ones over and over. So it made sense. But at that point, I didn't have any jokes. Now it's a plethora. It is. The thing is they don't laugh and you have to be like, I do comedy. And they're like, oh, hey, wait a minute. I'll listen now.

All right. So. I have a comedy now. It's mostly just a merch van that I drive around. Yeah. You got Sean Prelive air fresheners and such. Everything. I don't know what, like, I know I see cabbies

when they're hanging out then they just smoke a lot or hang out, lean on the cab what do you do when you're not driving around in a cab? well that doesn't exist because even like the show Taxi they used to be on, a great show they were always in the office

they were never taxiing very few episodes where they were in the cab they were always talking I'm not few episodes where they were in the cab. They were always talking. Yeah, do you guys all hang out at the garage? I'm not even allowed in the office at night. They lock the doors. And I will say this about the place I work. There's fat in that office.

Like, unbelievably fat. Like, I walk in, it looks like a tug-of-war team tryout. It's that big. And then there's only like nine people that work there. And there's a vending machine in there. They all have their ownout. It's that big. And then there's only like nine people that work there. And there's a vending machine in there. They all have their own row. It's disgusting. Oh, yeah.

You make requests. They do. They have the little sticky notes. They'll be like, we have more almonds. So what? It's nothing like what people see. Because I don't sit around ever. But they have their own row, don't they?

Why don't they just go to Costco? I know. Like, is it the fun of buying the... It is fun. I think they eat their own road, don't they? Why don't they just go to Costco? I know. Like, is it the fun of buying the... It is fun. Well, I think they eat their stuff. And then they're like, I need more stuff. They're big. I mean, it is.

It would be great if you worked at, like, a place that had nine employees and they just had a claw machine. Can we get more SpongeBob? Somebody's desk is just overfilled with SpongeBobs. And it's bad because I came in there once and I had to drop something off late at night. And the guy came to the door and he had like a painter's suit on. I'm like, oh, are you guys painting? He's like, no, there was a bed bug scare. And I'm like, good lord.

This is late at work. Come on, guys. Get it together. Get it together. Yeah. Is there like a rival? Or is there like, what's the relationship between the dispatchers and the drivers? Oh, they hate us.

They despise us and we have no power. If I say anything, they'll just take me down just like that. How do they take you down? They just shut off my computer. But you can go rogue and just drive around and pick people up. But I mean, that's just so random. that's like trying to drive around and find money. Oh, you mean just trying to pick up like flags or whatever? Yeah, just pick up flags.

Right. Because they'll take you down for a couple hours for this or that. But, yeah, they've got that mentality. And I don't get it because they're super rude to people when they call. If you've ever been drunk and called to get a cab and you're not nice to them, they'll just hang up on you. Yeah. They don't care. They kind of know what position they're in.

Like, you've kind of blown all your other options for a ride. You think you're too good for the bus? Yeah, too good for the bus. So they're super rude to the customers. But then they make us like, we have a dress code. I don't even get it because I'm like, have you smelled some of the cab drivers? Like, this guy has not bathed. It is ripe.

He wears the right thing. He just wears it every day. So it's just I don't get a lot of the stuff why they do that. But, I mean, it's just it's a terrible job. But it really is. It's got so many things where you're like, I mean, I can literally go to work and lose money. Lose money. How is that possible?

Very possible. You're like a guy whose job is like betting on the horses. And my chance of being stabbed had increased by about 5,000%. Every time I get in the cab, I'm like, this could be the day. What's the sketchiest thing that's happened? Somebody's like, I'm about to pound you in the face. Whoa. Yeah.

And you're like, all right. I mutter something. I'm like, pound you in the face. Whoa. Yeah. And you're like, where is? I mutter something. I'm like, security camera sure is high def. What precipitated it? He got in. And you know, the weird part is people don't want to hear the cab driver talk about how his day's not going great. Oh. And even though I do it funny, but the guy came in.

I don't know. I said a couple things And I played a negative thing Just he's like How's it going? I'm like yeah You know I've had better days But you know

No big deal Just a Tuesday And then I said something else And then he goes I don't like your attitude You're bringing me down I'm on a murderer's high And I'm like

Well I did try to put A little comedy in the thing there I'm just trying to milk you For a little tip here. But he just got more bitter and bitter. And then we dropped his body off

and then, yeah, at some point, he was about to pound me in the face. Jesus. But what he didn't know is I was about to

stab him in the eye with my pen. Because that's, I'm always on pen stab alert. That's all I got. I got one pen, one stab,

one opportunity. Do any cab drivers carry like a weapon? Yeah, I think opportunity. Do any cab drivers carry like a weapon? Yeah, I think so. Or mace and things like that. Mace is a cab driver? The wrecker? Yes, exactly. I know it wrecks a lot of the indoor of the cab. So yeah, it's just, I think ultimately what you learn in a cab is that you just agree with people, right? It doesn't matter what they're doing. Just agree with them. It makes your life easier. Yeah, one minute.

Yeah, I'm a racist. One minute. Just agree with them. Because people want to argue with you. They want to argue with you in a cab. I even got in an argument with an old lady over what the best type of jam was. Seriously. Oh, man.

It's got to be marmalade. Am I right? She was trying to say it was raspberry. I'm like, it's not raspberry. Get out of my cab. It wasn't even raspberry. It wasn't number one when there's the great strawberry shortage. Were you saying strawberry's number one?

Strawberry's number one. I'm not saying it's my favorite. I'm just saying it's the most popular. Oh, it's the most popular. I would think grape jelly. No? No? That's like old man jam.

People just eat strawberry. I mean, but she got really adamant about it. And frankly, I didn't like her attitude. Yeah. You picked her up from the smucker's plant. For sure. So you learn on that. Just don't argue with people.

But when they pay you and they get out of the cab, then you say something as you drive away. That's the way to do it. Or you have a cell phone number. Like, I still have a message on my machine that I'm going to call back. A guy called and he didn't need a cab. I called and said, you still need a cab? He's like, yeah, no, whatever. And I gave him a little, you know, what, what?

Anyways, because he could see my number, he called me back and left a message. And it is pretty rude. Wow. So I still have my phone, but I'd probably do it today. You keep resaving this message? I keep resaving it because I'm going to call him back from several other numbers and bounce

it back his way. But I can't do it on my phone. I'm saving it up. So what happens? Well, people call for a cab and then you take the whatever and you don't care about me. But I'm like, I just drove to come get you. Oh, so they blow you off.

I told him you just wasted my time in the least nice way I could. Right. But then he had to call back and chirp it his way. Ah, you're like a big man. Yeah, that's exactly it. You're like, it's a strawberry jam forever. Yeah, exactly. It's strawberry.

But yeah, I mean, stuff like that. I mean, I'm generally people. They just want to, I don't know if it's the color they can. They want to yell at you. They want to give you the thing. I mean, I get the finger every day. Even if I haven't done anything. Somebody will honk at me.

That's crazy. You're unpopular. You're like a pylon that annoys people out on the road, and they just don't like you. Weird. But they're sure glad to see you when it's raining. Oh, yeah. Hey, they're all excited. But, I mean, I've had people get in, and my meters was left on just from the last fair,

and a guy goes, 986, this guy's trying to rip us off. I'm like, I just stopped. Somebody got out. And then I'm like, get out. Get out. So, I've said get out in as many nasty ways

as you can. Oh, man. I had to bulldoze a woman out once. Like literally? Literally. Oh, God, it was awful.

I picked these two people up and they were so hammered they wouldn't get in the car. And then they finally said, we're finally getting i should have just drove away and uh they spoke french uh and they got in the girl and she's a little weird they just made out anyways and i dropped them off as soon as you

get there they're like blah blah blah and i'm uh like yeah okay we pay we gotta gotta go and he goes you may have to take her somewhere and i'm like well if you don't have an address i can't take her anywhere and she wouldn't get out of the car. And he couldn't talk her out. And I said, listen, well, let's just help her out. And he's like, no. And I said, well, she can't stay. I said, why do you want to? I don't even want to be here.

So finally I said, you got 30 seconds. 30 seconds. Because I opened the door and said, get the hell out. And she just shut the door. And I'm like, all right. So I went around. What was her plan? Like, I live here now.

Well, yeah. Because he was my only interpreter. And suddenly I'm like, he wanted to come, but he didn't want to come. It made no sense, right? And I'm like, I had to just get her out. So I went around the other side of the door. The dude was on the other side. And I opened the door and she was there. And I just bulldozed her right out.

Ass over tea kettle, right onto the ground. Then the dude grabbed me. And I'm trying to get out of the car. And he's drunk. And I'm like, I told him, you of the car and he's drunk. And I told him, you're drunk. I'm not drunk. And anyways, I just...

It's not right for us to make love now. Well, that's the thing. It was a wrestling match and it just... I know we both want it, but I don't want it to happen like this. This is the worst way to be asked to be a threesome. We're wasting energy. We like the way that you bulldozed. Oh, I bulldozed her good.

If I had any video footage I could watch from that cab, that would be the one. She should have seen it coming. If I crawled in the back seat there, you know something bad's going to happen. But the best part was, as I got out of the car, because he wasn't as strong as me, I gave him a shove.

So the girl was lying on the ground, gets up kind of, you know, but she was like in a cat position. And I pushed him so hard he tripped over her and then fell on the ground. So they both were lying like, ah. Like turtles. And to me, I'm like, okay, I'm going to get away here. Otherwise, I'm going to probably beat this guy up pretty bad. But I couldn't start the car quick enough.

So he started booting the door and then he ripped off my top thing. And then I'm like, oh, do I go back and, you know, kick his ass for this? Or it was just a mess. Like he ripped off the like. He started hulking. And I'm like, I don't get it. Because if I was in the same situation and the guy pushed me quite easily over top of somebody, I'd be like, I don't know if I want to go out. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think I learned my lesson. And I got the girl. So, I mean, I didn't get it, but he hulked out of my car. But somebody just told me, they go, oh, if you do that, what you do is you drive them to the police station and they'll get them out. And I'm like, that does seem a little bit better. Oh, yeah. Live and learn on that one. Were you with me on that?

Were you with me on that? We went on a gig once where the guy picked us up from the airport, and there was, like, it was me and you and I think JP Mass. Yeah. And we drove the whole way to the gig, and then at the end of the drive, the guy was like, hey, can you help me get some stuff out of the trunk? And his girlfriend was in the trunk? Yeah, yeah. And it was like he thought it was, like, a funny gag to have her in the trunk yeah yeah and it was like he thought it was like a funny

gag to have her in the trunk and like we were just like ah like now we're on an island like we can't get what what was she in on the the joke i i guess i think she was yeah i don't really know what was like was she like uh did she was she wearing like was she duct taped together? I thought she played along. Yeah. I think, yeah. How long a drive was it? 20 minutes probably from the airport to wherever. It wasn't a smooth sail over. But it wasn't like a thing where it was like, ah, remember I talked about how my girlfriend's dead?

She's not. She's in the trunk. Like there was no, we didn't, like when JP opened the trunk, he was like, what the fuck is this? Like, it just looked like, oh, we've made a horrible mistake coming here. He should have said nothing. That would have been funnier. Just nothing. Yeah.

And walks out. What did you want me to get out of the trunk? I think he's done it before. I kind of got that impression. Yeah, I think that's like his go-to gag. Yeah, so. Would you like his go-to gag. Yeah. Would you do that for a gag? Like wait in the trunk for 20 minutes and be driven around?

I mean, before smartphones, I don't think I could do it. What would I do for a gag? Like how long would I stand in a place or do something like to pop out and scare somebody? I'd say 10 minutes maximum. But, yeah, it would have to be a guarantee that you're going to pop out and scare somebody i'd say 10 minutes maximum but yeah it would have to be a guarantee that you're going to pop out at the right time yeah yeah yeah yeah exactly yeah and also uh you know like i really want somebody to drop something like a cake that they just made something like it would have to be a pretty big payoff i do any cake gags. Yeah. I don't think... What's the one on...

They do this all the time on Cake Boss. Where, like, someone will screw up a delivery, and so they'll have to... They'll be like, oh yeah, there's something for you outside, and the person will walk outside, and someone on top of the building will pour water onto them, and then flour.

Oh, yeah, like they cake them. They onto them and then flour. Oh, yeah. Like they cake them. They make them into a cake. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think I've ever done that thing in the trunk. I feel like it was a big thing at the drive-in. Oh, okay. You would get in the trunk.

Well, you grew up in the 50s. That's true. Or the ferries. People used to do that in the ferries all the time. Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah. Still will. I let you in the trunk. I want half the money, though. But when do you get out? At the end of the ferry ride. That would be tough because I think they would spot you if you got out of the trunk. Yeah.

Yeah. So do you just like, is there oxygen in a trunk? I think so. I don't think you suffocate in a trunk. I have a hatchback, so it's super. There's tons of oxygen there. Yeah, I don't. On the ferry, that seems like a really, I don't know, dicey proposition. You're making money on that, at least. You're saving a few dollars. Yeah. Like seven.

Seven dollars. That's better than driving your girlfriend for nothing. For a gag that did not pay off in any way, shape, or form. That was the craziest part. And there was ample room in the car for her to be a passenger. Like it wasn't. She's got better things to do than, you know, just be a passenger. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But she didn't like scare him. Like that was the thing too. She didn't like pop out like, surprise. Yeah. She just was like, hey, play along. She played along was the thing, too. She didn't, like, pop out, like, surprise. Yeah. She just was, like, hey, play along. She played along, like, yeah, that's my boyfriend. I would do it if it was, like, if there was a payoff. Like, if, you know, the guy you were driving around had two strikes.

And if I was made up to be, like, dead. Yes. I think I'd be made up to be dead. Just left in there would be even better. Yeah. You'd have to have a picture of you, like, on the dashboard of the guy. Like, you know, like, the guy's looking like, that's my best friend. Like, you'd have to set up the whole story. Yeah.

You know. Okay, what would be the perfect way to do it? Let's hash this out. A CD doing a news report that they're still looking for that person would be good as well. Oh, yeah. Yeah, let's listen to the radio. Yeah, it's the full report. They're looking for this killer.

If you could set up some Amber Alerts along the way. Yeah, you could get your friend who works for the city to set up some cones. And then last scene in whatever car you're driving. Yeah, yeah. And just all these subtle hints. And then just all of a sudden you make a crazy left turn. Like, oh, whoa, oh, we're just going to take a detour here. I just had a vision.

Yeah, and then you get to the gig. And I mean, yeah, the person would have to be painted. They'd have to have a plastic bag on their head and stuff. Oh, yeah, yeah. What are those? Do they make plastic bags you can breathe through yet? They now have like compost plastic bags. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You can get those lettuce bags that have a little. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The worst killer. Ah, take this. Yeah, or like, you know, just roll you up in a rug. There's all sorts of a tarp or something like that. Yeah, shower curtain. Shower curtain's the most affordable. Yeah, that like, you know, just roll you up in a rug. There's all sorts of a tarp or something like that. Yeah, shower curtain. Shower curtain's the most affordable.

Yeah, that's true. Oh, that's true. Who's got carpet money to deal with? Two bucks at Ikea. Yeah, so shower curtain, and then you pop out, and you go, ah, I'm not dead at all. This guy's not a murderer. I mean, he is a murderer, but he didn't murder me. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Murdered another guy. Had he made that effort for us, I think I would have made a better performance that night as well. Right? Oh, yeah. I matched. My performance matched that gag. I feel like there was also when we showed up, the guy was like, the place doesn't look great now, but that's because there's a memorial happening. There was a memorial.

A memorial what? There was a memorial happening during the day, and it was like of a very prominent guy from the town. So most of the town was at this memorial. And then they're like, hey, stick around. We got a late show coming up. Did the memorial serve chicken fingers? It did. There was a buffet that was slowly being put together after the memorial.

Yeah. It was crazy. They're like, no, we're going to change the lighting and everything. We're going to move the seats so they're not just all facing this casket over here. This casket's not going to be here. Well, this casket, we're going to put a tablecloth over top. Yeah, we're going to serve the roast beef off this casket. He bought a ticket, so he's still allowed to stay.

Yeah, it's an advance sale thing. Yeah, bought a ticket the week before. We're comping the corpse. Yeah, I just remember that. Like, just, I don't know. That just, when you were talking about, like, just crazy, like, crazy taxi things. Like, a person hiding in a trunk. Is it anything like the video game Crazy Taxi?

Oh, I wish. What about San Francisco Rush? Sometimes. You should see me trying to get to, because if there's a fair three blocks away, I have to get there as quickly as I can. If I'm driving down the road, I'll drive you fast, but if I'm trying to get that fair, man, I wail.

I see no speed signs. I don't care if your kid's playing on the street. I need that money. But it's that type of weird thing. Is there any camaraderie amongst? No, we hate each other. Really? You hate the dispatchers, you hate each other. It's not like taxing at all. And we hate ourselves.

Secretly. I mean, it would be a terrible job if I wasn't doing something else. I mean, for me, it's comedy-wise. I can sit there and I can listen to stuff. I can write. Generally, there's a lot of downtime. I mean, there's enough time to cry for half an hour.

There's a little something for everything. You can look through all the want. You can do everything. So, I mean, it has that. And then you get people in your cabin. I mean, it's just, I like the cross-section. I mean, I've never had a job where you'll meet different people at different moments that are just odd. I mean, like it's either the best day of their life or the worst day. They just got a job. They just got fired. They just met a

girl. They're about to kill their wife, whatever. There's a little bit of everything. And then there's varying degrees of drunkenness along the way. It starts off, everyone gets off work, a couple of beers after work. I'm staying out too late. It's 4 in the morning, and let's get some cocaine. Yeah, you sent me a recording of a guy. Yeah, that was one of the best. His name was The Rock. I got a call to go to McDonald's for The Rock. And I'm like, I said, how could I not go pick up a guy named The Rock?

Did you know that there was already a guy named that? That's the thing. I was going to be, the comparison was already. I'm looking for a big, tough guy. What did he look like? You know what's funny? I went there and there was a guy with his hands and his head just sitting on a curb and I pull up

and I'm like... You're the rock. I did. I said, are you the rock? He's like, no, Ross. I'm like, oh, okay. Makes more sense. Makes more sense. You look like a Ross. I'm going to give you that. Yeah, it was disappointing and that.

But he said to me. Do you smell what Ross is cooking? It's soup. Yeah, there's nothing cooking. I knew what he wanted to cook. The Rock. I think that was actually the title of his experience with me, The Rock. Because that's what he said.

He goes, I kept mummying. See if you'd be comfortable if we wouldn't got some crack. And I'm like, yeah. That's why they call you The Rock. Yeah, that's what it was. I'm like, yeah, I don't care as long as you pay the meter. I don't care what you do. But no shooting up.'s like that so uh but the gist of the story is i took the guy and he um got a bunch of money he uh went to go buy some crap he wasn't good at it

uh and this girl came up uh and i forgot i'll never forget her you remember the squirrel on ice age you know like yeah yeah well there was a girl that was just like that and she got in the hand. I forgot. I'll never forget her. You remember the squirrel on Ice Age? Well, there was a girl that was just like that, and she got in the back, and she didn't like this guy already, and she's like, give me the money, mister. Give me the money. And she goes, he went, do you know Sean? He's our cab driver. He said, I don't know why I don't care about it. You know Sean?

And I'm like, that's the rock. Anyways, he didn't have a pipe. She gave him the drug. He's like, I need a pipe. She goes, that's The Rock. Anyways, he didn't have a pipe. She gave him the drug. He's like, I need a pipe. She goes, I got a pipe. And then she left, and then he goes. Is this the guy's first time?

Yeah. He's like, I don't think she's going to bring me a pipe. And I'm like, well, we'll just go around the corner. We'll get you a pipe. So we pull around the corner. And he goes, what do I do? And I'm like, you go out and ask somebody if they got a pipe. And he goes, what do I do?

And I'm like, you go out and ask somebody if they've got a pipe. So I see him get out of the car and all these zombie junkies just start heading towards him. And I kind of see him go out of my sight. I'm like, this may not be good. But I'm texting somebody about this experience at that moment. Anyways, he gets back in the car. He's like, well, they took it. I'm like, what?

They took all my crack. And I'm like, what do you mean they took your crack? Why didn't you tell them you had crack? He goes, well, it's a commodity here. I'm like, you don't bring your crack. You smell fear. I got five bucks. I need a pipe. Yeah.

I couldn't believe that he got right. I felt like his mom would be like, do I got to go buy you your crack? By the way, gentlemen, I was hoping to smoke Some crack this afternoon So he's been ripped off Within minutes of getting it I need some help Smoking this crack

Yeah exactly I've got a bunch of crack I've got this I need a pipe Oh you want to See this I can't even imagine The scenario where he just

Didn't buy a pipe Crack inspector Crack inspector So as we're sitting there and explaining that he just got robbed, then this fat dude comes up with a Slurpee and just walks around the car looking in every window, Slurpee to Slurpee. And then he goes to the window and he just gets in the car. Just gets in the car. And those two decide. Do you know Sean?

Yes, exactly. He was drinking. He was Slurping the drink. He was like, What's in that? I don't think there's any liquid in there. So these guys go to get some more crack. Do they know each other? No.

This guy can help this guy, but he needs more money. He makes strange bedfellows. Needs more money. So we go to go to the bank to get him some more money. He makes a off-color joke about this guy on the way, and it was really awkward. And then everyone laughed. I'm like, Jesus. So then he starts telling me about how earlier he indulged with a hooker.

And after that experience, he was eating at McDonald's. He was doing all the Ross. The Ross. He was at the McDonald's. He had a hooker earlier before he pre-called me. And he says he had to go to use the washroom when the hooker was there. And when he came out, she had stolen his McDonald's. So I'm like, that was the story.

So I said, you've been ripped off by the hooker at McDonald's. And you just got ripped off. Anyways, these two go to get money. And then he comes back like 10 minutes later with another dude. And I'm like, where's the other dude? And he goes, he told my money three unbelievable just a target unbelievable and he's like should i trust this guy and i'm like well he's got a cell phone he's doing better than the other two so where do we drive but back to the first place he got robbed uh and then he

went with this guy and he came back and he was so stoned I mean he barely knew what he's doing so I guess he got what he wanted in anyways we take him to his place with the other guy they go to smoke and he gets out of the cab he's already paid me like the $75 this cab fares been which has been a good fare but at the beginning of the story he gave me an extra hundred and twenty five dollars to keep right there in the thing. And you robbed him. And I did! I robbed him! He got out of the car, and I robbed him of $120!

Four times! In one night! Sorry, Ross. Did he remember? No, he had no idea. That was like a tip. It was a generous tip, but I mean, I could have probably got out of the car.

Someone else was going to get it from him. Yeah, exactly. He's not the kind of guy that learns lessons. So I don't think he would have. Oh, man. That was either his rock bottom or his all-time best. My ATM limit is like 150 bucks. I couldn't get robbed.

Oh, yeah. That's it. That's so funny. And it was such a weird fare. And I couldn't get robbed. Oh, yeah. That's it. That's so funny. And it was such a weird fair, and I wanted to tell anybody. And literally the next guy I get in, I picked up in James Bay. He's a big, fat, kind of older guy. And I wanted to tell him, like, I just had this guy in the rock.

Anyways, and the guy says, take me down to the theater, the Odeon Theater. And I'm like, okay. And then he's like, actually, can you take me down one more block? And when you go down one more block from the Odeon Theater, I'm like, that's heading into, you know, the rocks territory. And then he goes actually just down there. And I dropped him off at the same spot. So he went by crack. I would have never guessed that this guy would have bought that. And it probably would have been probably a good story to tell him.

Let me be warned. These people are not. I hope you brought your own pipes. Why wouldn't you just get dropped off? Like if you're going to lie about, like, oh, yeah, take me to the movie theater. Why wouldn't you just get dropped off at the movie theater and walk the block? He's also a lazy crack. What's happened before?

I remember I picked up this girl at 7-Eleven, which is a couple blocks away, where Ross had an incident with the bank machine that I didn't tell you about. But anyways, the girl gets in. She goes, I don't feel well. Take me to Gordana. It was a good fare. And I'm like, all right. I thought she was sick. Like she drank something like that.

And I didn't think anything about it. But then I'm sitting downtown. It was like an hour and a half later. And she gets in my car. She's like, you again. And she's all happy. And I'm like, ah, you're a junkie. Okay.

I didn't know that. Because you would never have guessed. But she was there an hour and a half later. And I guess it does make people feel very nauseous. Yeah, yeah. I didn't know. Right, right, right. Because you would never have guessed. But, you know, she was there an hour and a half later. And I guess it does make people feel very nauseous. Yeah, yeah. I didn't get that. But the minute she got in my cab an hour and a half later, I'm like, didn't I just drive you? Yeah.

I just delivered a baby. I feel great. Yeah, yeah. I didn't get a tip the second time. Not as much dough in the bank. Wow. You see, like, you could write a whole book on all this stuff. Yeah, you just never know. I mean, you get just so many weird things. You don't know. I mean,

the thing is you hope it's somebody who's got money and a big tip and sometimes you've got great audience members or just some people that's so volatile. And I mean, I had a guy that got caught drinking, driving. I get that a lot where I have to drive people home and, you know, balance them out because they're here. Like they just got caught. Yeah, they, you know, lose their license and then they're just going through the motions. So you're always balancing people to make it not. I always say if you make them laugh, they're probably not going to stab you. And that's usually my balance where I'm like,

let's keep this comfortable. They might hulk out on your car. They could hulk out on their car and oh yeah, I've seen a cell phone bounce off a boyfriend's head for all sorts of times. The arguments I've seen in the car, unbelievable. Like, I'm just like, oh, man, there's somebody getting stabbed. And I said that to one guy with a hit in the head with a cell phone.

I just called him over and I said, you should hide the knives. And I'm serious. Hide the knives. That girl is psychotic. She was so angry at him. Yeah. He's like, don't tell me my business, man. I know.

I saw the fear in his eyes. He didn't want to go. Mike O'Brien would never stab you. Oh, give me a knife. Give me your pen. I'll show you. I just have some skewers. Yeah.

So, yeah. Well, that's – oh, man. I could listen to these stories all day. But Dave, what's going on with you? Well, not as great a story, but big night last night. Abby and I went out for dinner. Delicious. Yeah.

That's like the most delicious meal. Together? Yeah. Couldn't settle in a restaurant. Yeah, no, we had separate dates. We couldn't settle in a restaurant. Yeah, no, we had separate dates. And then as we're walking in to the restaurant, I saw that their special was this cod with pineapples and oranges and feta cheese.

And I was like, oh, to myself, I'm thinking, oh, that's pretty good. And then the waitress comes over and is telling us about the specials. And she mentions this cod. And it comes with this big salad. Like, it's huge. I've never seen anyone finish it yet. Oh, this is like a man versus food. And then Abby says, oh, well, that's a challenge for you, eh?

And I start to get, like, I'm angry at her that she said that because now I have this pressure. Now me and the waitress, if I order it, the waitress is going to be like, oh, you're going to try the challenge. And this is what I was going to order anyway. And so, okay. So I ordered it. Mountain of salad. I ordered it.

I said to Abby, if she says something when I order it, then you owe me. Like rings, like a triangle. Spotlight on top of it. I ordered it and they brung it and it

was delicious. It was two pieces of fish and then just this salad of fruit and vegetables. And it was pretty big. But I, like, I ate it no problem. And then the waitress comes by after I'm done. And you should have seen the pride on her face. She was beaming.

pride on her face. She was beaming. And I wonder, I'm wondering, does she just say that to bait people into ordering it? I've never seen anyone finish this. Yeah, yeah. We gotta get rid of all this romaine.

Or, was she, like, now when she gives the specials, will she have to say, I've only seen one guy finish this? Here's a photo of him. It's over there on the wall. Yeah, wow. Yeah, like, are you the stuff of legend?

Like, wait till I tell the lunch shift. Somebody finished it. We just made this salad as a joke. Yeah, exactly. It's not even the salad. It's just the big mixing bowl where they mix all the salads for the night. They just bring that out. Let's see if a guy will eat it.

It's all the food we were going to throw up. It was. It was. The cook would be like, this stuff's going to go bad. Push the salad if you can. Isn't that all the specials are? Yeah. It is.

I worked in many restaurants. It is exactly what it is. It's what's not going to make it. That's what I, like my New Year's resolution this year was to only get the special at restaurants until everyone talked me out of it. Special, yeah, like that buffet is the one that you got to watch over. Buffet is, it's cleaning out the fridge. And that's what it is. That's why they never make sense.

I mean, why are all these things together? No reason. No reason. I remember being at like a Chinese buffet and somebody was like, hey, check this out. And like balanced the ladle on the skin that had formed over one another. Over like the soup? Yeah. He was like, hey, check this out.

That's how long it had been sitting there. It's kombucha now. But you know, somebody came by and scooped it up. That was their favorite part. Skin? Yeah, exactly. I'm going to make a fence. Pinching it with their fingers. Yeah.

Skin on any food is absolutely terrifying. I can't do it. What about pudding? Pudding skin? Not a pudding skin. What about fruit roll-ups? That's just skin. That's true.

It does, but it feels different because you can kind of see through it. Yeah. No, you don't like pudding skin. No, I don't like pudding skin. I'm surprised. The worst is a Kraft dinner if you come back and left some on the pot and it forms a skin that I burn it. I don't throw it. I burn it.

I don't mind it. You don't mind old Kraft Dinner? Yeah. I don't. Yeah. I'm trying to think of what's a thing that really doesn't age well. Well, you have a whole bit about how a Subway sandwich, if you put it in the fridge.

It suddenly becomes. It's a sponge. It's like a raindrop. It's unbelievable. It is like a raindrop. It's a source of water. Yeah. It's like they're so moist, but not when you're eating it.

You're not like, hmm, this is a moist sandwich. And anything deep fried is gone in like five minutes, gone in 60 seconds. What about like back in the day when I ate like fried chicken, cold fried chicken was good. Yeah, how does that work? Yeah, because cold fried chicken is like – Because I think the chicken has the solid texture that you need. Right.

It becomes the texture compared to the sauce. Yeah. The skin that becomes – Old rice, I can't – I didn't get that. Oh, yeah. It dries out. Yeah, crunchy. Oh, I know. Crunchy. That's delicious. Yeah. I didn't get that. Oh, yeah. It dries out. Yeah, crunchy.

Crunchy. That's delicious. Yeah. I don't know. Is anything like that doesn't have crunchy on the label is not an enjoyable. Right? May form crunchiness. Yeah, exactly.

Like, that means there's a seed that's been left in. So did you get, it wasn't like an eat this salad and you get it for free kind of no no no it was like it this was the thing i was going to order as soon as i saw it on the sandwich board outside right but i felt like they sort of raised the stakes on me oh absolutely they did but it was i oh boy did i finish it did you feel like there maybe were some eyes on you from the kitchen looking through that little manhole like you should have asked if it was bottomless. Is this salad bottomless? And you should go back every day this week and do it. Easy peasy.

I'm back. They carry me out on their shoulders. It's just your face with a bunch of photographs on the wall. Yeah, that's right. We always go to this restaurant and it's a Lebanese restaurant, but it's like sort of faux Lebanese. Faux Lebanese. Like PHO? Yeah.

They have Vietnamese soup filled with, you know, deep fried cauliflower. And they, we always really fill up on food, but not so much that we don't go out for dessert. Oh, nice. We always go out for ice cream afterwards. But they're always pushing us on desserts, and we always have to say, oh, no, we're too full. Yeah. Because we don't want to eat a bottle of a... Yeah.

Ordering dessert at a restaurant feels like, I don't know, like you just... I can go to places that just make dessert. Yeah, that's true. Let's go to Death by Chocolate. It's too expensive. It's too expensive. I can't afford your $6.95 dessert. What is this?

I've got a Twix in the car. I can get a Twix for a dollar. When they offer you after dinner coffee, like, oh, do you want some some pie? Maybe some coffee? Like, no, I got to go to bed in an hour. Yeah. After dinner coffee. What's the idea there?

It's like, hey, you're probably going to have sex. Yeah. Stay up for that. Well, they want to get you a jittery and get out. Have over here some coffee and you bugger off. Yeah. But is it like, I don't know, having dessert, like ordering a dinner and then a dessert just feels like, what are you? What is it, Valentine's Day?

Yeah, exactly. Who are you, the king of Zion? If I'm with my parents, I am a dessert person. And they're paying for it. Oh, yeah. For whatever reason, I'm like, I always ask. The thing is, I know when I go with them, I can just have dessert and they can't say boo about it. They're like, you're not getting dessert.

You've seen your report card. That's why my dad carries my report card still so he never has to pay for desserts. Seems like a lot. I was at a restaurant recently and I got like,

I ordered just a dessert and that was, I felt like a real fancy lady just eating a chocolate mousse by myself. Pulls out his golden spoon. I brought my own spoon. Well, yeah, sometimes you go to restaurants and they consider a milkshake dessert.

Oh, I would. Because it's ice cream based. But you get it with your burger. You have it with your meal. Dessert and that's – Oh, you want it now? Have you ever gotten an order to shake and then they only bring you the glass of the shake? Yeah, you want the –

And you're missing the metal part? That pisses me off. We stole the best part of the shake, the bottom part. Yeah. No, yeah, that's right. When Graham and I went to Johnny Rockets at Yonge and Dundas Square, the heart of Toronto, they gave me a milkshake that was like half full. They gave me the metal container, but that was pretty much empty as well.

So like I had the equivalent of a whole milkshake, but in two cups. And your waiter's got milkshake on his lips. It's delicious. Thank you. Can I tell you about the 50s diner

I went to in Alberta where like I ordered the veggie burger off the menu and the lady was like... We didn't have these in the 50s diner I went to in Alberta where like I ordered the veggie burger off the menu and the lady was like we didn't have these in the 50s yeah she said she's like you know that doesn't have any meat on it right and I was like yeah that's that's why I ordered and then I could hear her

say to the cook yeah he says he wants it like we put it on the menu as a joke I think so yeah I guess. Go across the street and buy a veggie burger from somewhere because we don't have them. I'm sure it was Kirkland brand. Yeah.

Is that Man vs. Food? Is he still around? I've never watched that. I have. I know all about it. He is now no longer doing the show. He's a coach. Because his doctor, I think, told him

be like, you're going to die. Would he eat weird things or copious amounts? Huge amounts. Like milkshake wise, he did one where he had to drink like nine milk. It was impossible to drink that much. But I think he just did so much damage to his body that now he's

still just as excited. But you get to do it. Yeah. And the funny thing about the show is the premise-wise, he would go – Not in milkshakes. You'd be barfing it up and it would still be cold. Yeah. I'd like to see the after show of the next three hours after the show. I think that would really be something I'd be interested in because he has to die.

It must be the most painful. They must resuscitate him every time. after the show. I think that would really be something I'd be interested in because he has to die. Like, yeah, they've just got panels. They must resuscitate him every time. A hospital. Like, I just don't see how you could do that to yourself

all the time. Well, he goes to a place that has a famously big thing on the menu and it's like, you finish it. You get it for free or whatever. So the show's got no budget

and it's counting on him to finish this thing. That's right. We can't afford it. We're not paying $24 for that burger. But the whole town shows up to see him do this, and at the beginning of the show, he's like, I'm not a chef, and I'm not a professional eater. I'm just a guy who likes food.

I guess liked food. He probably doesn't anymore. I guess liked food. Yeah. Probably doesn't anymore. But sometimes it's like a hamburger, right? Like the size, like, you know, a basketball hoop or whatever. And then, but then there's also other stuff. Like they're like, we put a pizza on the hamburger.

We also like. On a Friday. And then a time limit. Hey, don't be dawdling while you eat this. That's right. He has to finish it in like an hour. And no going to the bathroom. That's a rule He has to finish it in like an hour. And no going to the bathroom. That's the rule. No going to the

bathroom. You can't take a bathroom break. Well, of course. It's okay. I'm wearing a diaper. Yeah, that's exactly it. I have to take a break after this first bite. He just takes a good, delivering the whole sandwich to the toilet. He takes a sip of water and spits a giant chunk of

burger into it. Like that trick bartenders do. You buy them a shot. Oh, is that what they do? They drink it and then just spit it back into a thing? They'll drink a shot

of whatever and then they'll chase it with a bottle of beer but they'll just be spitting it back into the beer. That's pretty clever. That is really clever

because sometimes you get sent. That's what I learned in my days at Coyote Ugly. No neckties. That was really the only rule. Graham, what's going on with you, my friend?

It's only been two days since we last recorded. But in that two days, my friend from Portland, Jeanette. Yes, Jeanette. Very funny. Yeah. She's in town at a comic book convention. And she took the bus up from Portland. So I went to go meet her at the bus station.

And when I went to go meet her, like, they were filming something in the bus station. But what they were filming was it was a bus station. Like, it wasn't being used as a something else. It was they were filming a scene that takes place in a bus station but what they were filming was it was a bus station like it wasn't being used as a something else it was they were filming a scene that takes place in a bus station okay so there were extras and real people that all looked like possible passengers they didn't close down the bus station to film this yeah like so you had to walk through the bus station to get to where the buses arrive and but there was no like the I'm sure the extras wranglers had no fucking idea who was who because everybody had, like, backpacks and suitcases. And except the one guy that was, I was like, aha, this guy's not for real, was the fake homeless guy.

Right. Because when I walked by, I was like, no. Not even close. Yeah, not a method act that's right i think it would be pretty easy to tell who was the extras they would be the people not uh in a hurry to get out of the bus station it's true you can also yell and cut and see who moves yeah but there was a scene where they started rolling and i was like i have no idea if i'm in the shot out of the shot if they give a shit like but i could yeah like looking around i was like yeah the people who are kind

of like don't look bleary eyes and like uh they're probably extras but then i saw another guy that was like so cartoonishly sleeping on a thing i was like like, that guy's got to be an extra. But he wasn't. Sounds like a really good movie. Did you see Lorenzo Lamas? He wishes. Who was the lady that I saw? Debbie Gibson. No. Was married to John Stamos. Oh, Rebecca Romaine.

Rebecca Romaine. What? Yeah. I couldn't tell who she was at first, but I was like, ooh, that's somebody famous. Yeah. That's somebody you wouldn't see in a bus station. She's got to be an actress. She doesn't need to do that.

She's married to Jerry O'Connell. She was mystique. Yeah. Is she married to Jerry O'Connell? Yeah. Wow. They've got two beautiful kids. Yeah.

And three ugly ones. That surprises me. They gave three ugly ones that look like Chunk. Was that a different movie? Then Stand By like Chunk. Was that a different movie? Than Stand By Me? Yeah. Was that Goonies? Yeah.

It was the same basic part, right? I haven't seen Goonies. Bunch of kids going on an adventure. Find Dead Body. One of those fans. Kiefer Sutherland is there. Yeah. They barf up some pies.

Oh, yeah. That's Stand by me. It feels like it would be at home in any other film. Better soundtrack to Goonies. Was it? No. It had Cindy Lauper. Goonies got what it takes.

Goonies arguing. Goonies just want to have fun. Take two. Goonies just want to have fun. Take two. Goonies. She just has to record that for all the things. I don't remember Lou Albano being a Goonie.

Alf just wants to have fun. She did every 80s trend. Max Headroom just wants to have fun. New Coke just wants to have fun. But yeah, so that was kind of my adventure in my own city. I didn't think that they filmed things here anymore. So that was...

They do. Yeah. It was fun that some people were working. There were some fake cops and real cops. Real cops and fake cops. All on the same set. Coexistent. Who would you get suicided by?

I mean, the real cops are going to, they're going to do it right. They're going to do it right the first time. Suicide by a fake cop. They just kind of

kick you to death over the course of a day. So you were a background, background performer? Yeah, like I was unpaid extra work. Unpaid extra work.

I feel like some people were looking at me like, I like what he's doing there. I like his walk. Very confident. You should have tap danced all the way across. Who's that guy with the shiny feet? Like the guy who pulled his dick out in Teen Wolf?

There's a guy at the end of the movie. No. Yeah, yeah. Really? Yeah, in the last scene, just as it kind of goes to slow motion and the credits start rolling, there's a guy who's just going to stick out in the bleachers oh man i see people that look like they're teen wolf all the time like honestly god like you look you know like the dad when he kind of went all uh yeah i see that guy all the time and it makes me laugh like have you not seen the movie man you should

change your hair it's as you got it's not a good look. You've got to stop going out on a full moon day. Change yourself up in a barn or something. It's just puffy. It was too puffy. I don't know what it is. I see it, and that's all I can think of. You blow a dog whistle to see if it gets any reaction. Oh, man.

But, yeah, so that's what's been going on with me. That's good fun. Yeah, good fun all around. Do you want to go on to some overheards? Please. I'm Cameron Esposito, and I'm the host of Maximum Fun's new podcast, Wham! Yeah, good fun all around. Do you want to go on to some overheards? Please. I'm Cameron Esposito, and I'm the host of Maximum Fun's new podcast, Wham! Bam! Pow! A sci-fi movie show and action movies.

Also, did I forget to say action movies? Every week I'll be joined by Mr. Ricky Comona and Ms. Rhea Butcher. And we are going to chat about films. We're going to tell jokes. We're going to be hilarious. We're going to play games. We're going to have guests. We're going to be hilarious. We're going to play games. We're going to have guests. We're going to give reviews.

It's going to blow your mind. If you want to listen to the show, you can find it at MaximumFun.org or you can subscribe on iTunes. Can you believe how many things I just listed? So many things. Wow! That's great. Overheard. Overheard's a segment in which you, the listener, you, the host, you, the guest, go out there in the world and you listen to things that are hilarious.

You bring them back. You bring them back. You report them in full. I'm assuming, Sean, that you have. Wait, Graham. Yeah. Are you sure? I am.

Okay. Absolutely. I'm sure that you have a plenty from your life. You would think. I would think. The minute you wrote down overheards, I couldn't remember any of them. I wrote some down, but I couldn't even find them. So what you're saying is no?

I have a couple, but nothing. Nothing anyone's going to be like, that's the best ever. There's going to be no ribbons passed out on today's episode. Well, that's too bad. Yeah, I brought all these ribbons. No, that's exactly it. They're staring at us. The most common, I'll say, the most common overheard I hear is always, obviously at work.

Like when I do stand-up, I always hear, this guy's not funny. I hear that one. I mean, that's a dime or dozen one, for sure. You always hear it. It doesn't matter how far in the audience it is. If that phrase is spoken, you can hear it. I'm like, oh, what's that? Oh, no.

Yeah, exactly. Uh-oh. Yeah. Confidence drained. But I get a lot in the cabs But I mean I don't get why people talk When you're in a cab

So freely There's not like there's a glass barrier Oh you mean like to each other Yeah they talk to each other They get in And it's not like I look East Indian Where I may not speak English I mean I'm a handsome white man

Very handsome Obviously I got nothing to do I'm a handsome white man. Very handsome. Obviously, I got nothing to do. I'm going to listen. But people just talk freely, and it blows my mind that they do that. Like I've had people talk about, you know, that somebody just died, but intimate details. And I'm like, why? Why now? And on the phone, not even to me, and just stuff like that.

So, I mean, I do get to hear some good ones. Two stand out that I could remember, and one was this dude and this girl, and it's always a kind of girl. Those are my favorites in the cab. It was a black dude and a very gorgeous girl, and they were young, and they were talking on the way home, and she was a little quiet, and he's like,

talking about his family, he goes, my family loves you, you're the best. And she was, like, and he's like, talking about his family, he goes, my family loves you. You're the best. And she was like, not confident that they liked her. And then she went, but you don't know me. I have secrets.

Right? And I'm like, you know, if you saw my ears, just like, yeah, exactly. Adjusting thing. I'd go in procedure

and be like, one second. Oh, we're stuck in traffic here. yeah, exactly, adjusting things. I'd go in procedure and be like, one second. Hey, we're stuck in traffic here. No, I'm a pro. I hold on that wheel. I'm like, don't even move it an inch. Freeze up. Just blow through this red light.

Yeah, for sure. You would expect at that moment somebody says, but I was like, but wait till we get home, I'll tell you. And I'm like, ah, that's what I expect. But no, just kept on a blabber. Wow. Which she wouldn't say. I have a secret.

She's like, you can tell me anything. I'm all there for you. She's like, no. I'm like, come on, babe. And then she reveals it wasn't even a good one. She's like, I pull out my hair. And I'm like, what? That's it?

No. Big deal. I felt like going dumper dumper yeah exactly it's the reason for your family not to like her

it is maybe there was better stuff there but it didn't seem like that was enough to break the deal for it yeah well also

I've noticed that you've been going bald yeah it's a little weird I still love your patches exactly and I'd be like

don't get any on the back seat it's so yeah but it's that one but it's always a guy and a girl

for me the overheards and one of my it's just it's always the scenario where a guy and a girl get in the cab and I mean obviously

it's late after a bar things are going well you would look at them and be like looks like there's gonna be some action tonight. And that's my favorite. I'm like,

oh, these two people going. But inevitably, guys will say something on the ride home. They have not secured the girl at the house and they'll say something.

You should pull your hair out your mustache hair. Come on. They don't get it. They'll say something and they don't realize they've said something that just ended the deal

right there, right? But I do. I'm like, you're in the hole right now. And that always kills me because sometimes they'll save it and sometimes they make it worse. And I love that because the thing is I can't help or I can hinder or I can just say nothing. And I sit there and it happens at least once a week. And it's so funny to listen to people that are kind of drunk because they don't listen. listen guys just they're trying to say the perfect thing to keep it going but they're not really listening what's going on and they lose it and i like that because usually the girl like takes the

cab after so i'm like it's a double fare so i'm kind of i used to help a guy be like ah no i meant this but uh uh but that's always my favorite words because i just hear somebody blow it they'll say one thing like Like what? Like the girl was – they were talking about the girl at the club and the people, some of the people. And clearly things were going well for these two. And Kelsey, the girl, I think her name is like that. She's like – she goes, yeah, I don't like Kelsey. And he goes, oh, Kelsey, she's a great kisser.

But just moved on and then moved on. And I could tell that she's just like – Yeah. And man, was she mad. Man, was she mad. And he still didn't get it. He just kind of went on. But I'm like, I knew him.

The great thing about Kelsey is she doesn't have a lot of hang-ups about saying the right thing. Sockiest tongue ever. Yeah, I just couldn't believe he said it. I'm like, oh, man, that's awful. Yeah, you're not getting laid at all. Oh, man, that's great. I never talk in a cab. Yeah.

Like, especially by myself. I chat with the driver. Oh, no, I do not. Oh, and sometimes to my, because sometimes I'll get a driver that just wants to, you know, have a conversation. I ask him, you know, where you're from. Yeah, yeah. I don't mind chatting.

Although I got in a cab in toronto where a guy like he said hey do you want to hear a joke i was like sure and then he told me something that a wasn't a joke it was like some sort of riddle and also it was like super offensive he really was right because women can't be doctors but it was crazy like it was and i and i at one point i was like this this riddle is so it's so great i felt like i was on like a hidden camera show like are they gauging my reaction to this guy like some people will laugh at a joke even though it's horrible just to make the other person feel comfortable. Yeah, it was like a psychological experiment. Yeah, yeah.

I remember one... I don't know, man. You do get a lot of East Indian or South Asian cab drivers here, and so you do have that sort of like, I don't feel bad. And quite often

they have one headphone in and they're talking on the phone to someone. I don't mind that. But when it's like the only time I really remember having a white cab driver, it was this guy. And he started chatting it up with me. Yeah. And I was giving him nothing. And then so he turned the radio back on and it was scripture. It was just...

Oh, and you're like, okay, I'll talk to you. Yes. Here's your choices. Scripture or talk to me. Yes, we manipulate the airwaves. I put on East India music sometimes. People are like, can we get some music? I'm like, sure.

And I crank it up. Ah, yay. Day drivers. Oh, wait. Yeah, you have an overheard. I was going to ask you. My overheard isn't my own. It is Abby overheard this when you did your Ring-a-Ding-Dong Dandy show.

Oh, fun. Which is the wrestling live show that you do. The next one's on July 4th. Oh, wow. With special guest. A real live Oh, wow. American. Yeah. With special guest. A real live nephew of your Uncle Sam. Yeah. Colt Cabana will be

our special guest on the July 4th edition. That's confirmed? Confirmed. Oh, wow. Yeah. You were pretty tight-lipped about it before. Yeah. And loose lip sync ships, but this ship has a right to sail as the Titanic. So at this last show,

what did you wear? I was wearing a... What would you say? There's a weightlifter shirt, kind of like a singlet. It was like... You could see my nipples. And it had kind of a... It was like a tank top-y thing. Yeah, but like a very narrow

tank top. And... What did John but like a very narrow tank top. And what is John's going to say? Is it the shirt you're wearing right now? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. And I was wearing like a Hulk Hogan bandana. Right. Yeah. And over top you were wearing another shirt that you tore off.

That I ripped off Hulk Hogan style. Yeah. Did you pre-rip it? Well, I cut the neck Hogan style. Did you pre-rip it? Well, I cut the neck part, yeah. Absolutely. You're not in ripping shape. And Abby overheard this after you ripped off your shirt and you were sort of standing in front of everyone celebrating.

And your nipple was showing. She overheard a guy say, wow, he's really high nippled. It's true. They're almost up near my neck. Yeah. Well, you have six of them. Yeah, that's why I can't wear V-necks.

You can see them. It's true, I have high nipples. I don't think that's the case, is it? Well, no, I think I'm average nippled but I'm not low nippled I don't even know why I have them they don't do anything they do something for me

mine? yeah I get a good charge out of them I use them to tell how far I've run when they bleed I've run too far. Oh, why? How do marathon runners not, like, because that's, like, now an established thing. Well, they tape them up, or they, like, they're probably, like, shirt materials now that. Yeah, but you still see guys, like, finishing a marathon with, like, bloody shirts.

I do. It hurts. The three times it's happened to me. But like, now if you were a runner and like, say you were, that was your kind of career

or you were like going to be in marathons in the Olympics and whatever, wouldn't you have your nipples just removed? Like, it seems like a,

right? Like a surgery. That would be cheating. Women wear sports bras so that helps, right? Yeah. I don't know how bras work

but i imagine that the fabric doesn't shift around on them yeah can we are there male sports bras for marathon runners well the thing is is that the marathon runner is a very skinny man he doesn't have any uh breasts to uh to settle into a bra so you'd have to wear a training bra i put uh i put vaseline on uh mine and then it just oiled through my shirt so i had two huge oil stains right there which isn't i don't have the blood yeah it wasn't people are asking you about it oh no there's a couple pepperoni down they wanted to ask they just looked at me like something bad happened. You weren't even running. You just did that.

You were just running to catch a bus. They're like perfect circles, too. It was just... Milk, milk, lemonade. Lesson learned. Graham, do you have an overheard? Yeah. Mine is courtesy of... I was walking

down the street with Charlie Demers, past guest, and he overheard this and passed it along to me. There was a giant PETA mascot handing out coupons to people on the street. to people on the street. And there was two guys that kind of went on either side of the PETA mascot, and the mascot handed him a, hey, come get a half-rice PETA or whatever. And the guy said, oh, cool, I'm definitely going to check this out. And then his friend goes, just by the way, bro, he's not going to check it out. Get your hopes up. Yeah.

Like, we're not going to see you later, giant PETA. Is there one company that makes these foam rubber costumes? Because it's like... Oh, yeah. Because they have to keep making them. You know, 50 years ago, there weren't PETA mascots. No, that's true. Well, yeah, I guess there is, like...

Unless they made a taco into the evolution. pita mascots. No, that's true. Well, yeah, I guess there is like, there's got to be one. There's got to be one into the evolution. Yeah, that's right. Like, just trying to like meld an old mascot into a new, like, hey, he's a skunk,

but you know, it's because our food doesn't stink. I don't know if a mascot has ever won me over enough to go get the product. where I'm like, well, look at that guy. Yeah. We have a guy that dances with a pizza sign. But, I mean, he's got like electric feet.

Oh, like he's like, but he's just a guy. He's not a mascot. Yeah. But he wears a mask so you can't see his face. Could be anyone. Could be your mayor. Could be me on my days off. Nobody knows.

You can't see his face. It could be anyone. It could be your mayor. It could be me on my days off. Nobody knows. They used to have mascot races. Still do at the baseball games. At the baseball games, yeah. But they would be a lot of companies you didn't know had mascots.

Yeah. And it wouldn't all be sports mascots because there's only two baseball teams playing. And I'm assuming they don't travel with their mascots. Well, there's always a hot dog, Oscar Mayer guys go on. A few things go like that. But then it would be like Joseph and Joseph, barristers and solicitors. Raccoon.

That ass. Yeah, I don't... I tried to get a job once as a mascot, but you have to be the exact size of the costume. Right. My friend used to get a job once as a mascot, but you have to be the exact size of the costume. My friend used to be a mascot. Really? Yeah, he used to be the fox.

Oh, that rocks. Did he ever get beaten up? He was like a hazard to the job. Yeah, I think he'd probably take one in the gut. Yeah. Do you remember that gig we were talking about earlier with the lady in the trunk? We went to A&W open that weekend, too. That's right.

Remember? We had the root beer bear there. That was the big thing in town was, hey, we're getting an A&W. And the root beer bear kicked me. He kicked me. Oh, yeah, that's right. But didn't you go up? Didn't you try to do something to him?

I may have. I don't remember that. That part's vague in my mind. But I remember he kicked me, and it was an aggressive. I remember us daring you to go do something to the mascot, and you didn't. Something happened. And then he kicked you. Yeah.

Partial. It was a soft mauling. That's really what it was. But, Al, you know that it's a big deal if the root beer bear shows up. Yeah. Like to your town. There's only one of him. Yeah.

They gave him the key to the town. He's like some 16-year-old kid. Oh, man. But yeah. They got those inflatable mascots now, you know? Oh, yeah, like the Toronto Raptors one? Yeah. That got

deflated? Yeah, it fell on his face. Yeah, I guess it fell on his face. Anyways, maybe there's still time for me to become a mascot. I like the mascots that can't see anything out of their thing, so they have a guide with them, like a guide person. I'm just going to throw this out. I think your show should get a mascot. Okay, yeah.

What would it be? Grandpa. A giant grandpa. Sure. That would Okay, yeah. What would it be? Grandpa. A giant grandpa. Sure. That'd be pretty great. Yeah, I'm wondering if there's something like from the show

that's like... I mean Hulk Hogan. If there's something that stands out. Uninflatable Hulk Hogan. The Ross. Oh, yeah. Why don't you write us, listener?

Yeah. Write us and let us know what should be our... It has to be the type of mascot like the traditional kind like the put put on a giant head and a costume that goes with it preferably big floppy feet yeah as well because we're gonna be at a lot of outdoor festivals this summer that's true we're gonna be a lot at a lot of uh street fests yeah uh we're gonna do some uh sidewalk sales now speaking of uh street fests this is this uh overheard from a listener Yep. We're going to do some... Sidewalk sales.

Now, speaking of street fests, this is this overheard from a listener. We also have overheards from listeners. Oh, yeah. If people want to write us, what do they do about it? Well, they go to the computer, log on. Log on. And send an email to spy at maximumfund.org. And this first one comes from Ryan M. And Ryan M. says he's from Lancaster, Pennsylvania.

I've been doing stand-up for about a year. So I friended a lot of comics on Facebook. And to my delight, this was in my feed tonight. So this is somebody writing about their career. Somewhere in the grand scheme of things, I've lost who I was. Comedy started taking over my life, and although I have enjoyed every minute of it,

it's draining away, or it's draining, always looking at everything that happens as a potential joke. It is possible to be funny and or goofy without trying to get the approval of strangers to verify that you can make them laugh. I am not insulting or deme get the approval of strangers to verify that you can make them laugh i am not insulting or demeaning the life of any comic as comedy has shown and taught me so much

it's not an easy thing to do to get up in front of a room full of strangers with the intent on making them laugh 12 years ago i learned a skill set that has slowly been fading away and although i am not quitting comedy i am putting it on the back burner i would have never gotten into it if it weren't for juggling i will continue to work on new material but i am also going back to what brought me here in the first place i am a juggler and it's about time i master this seven ball cascade come see me this summer at the delaware beach where i performed my first street show ever and maybe by the end of summer i'll have some new tricks to show off with wow yeah wow

signed a clown a clown i never get those messages because comedians are notorious for not wanting to friend anyone on Facebook. That's true. So, yeah, like, this is a guy who, you know, I mean, he's in Lancaster, Pennsylvania. He's performing for the Amish. They don't get any of his jokes about, hey, microwaves are weird. Yeah, we're like, have you seen this new commercial? Have you guys tried this?

The Doritos Loco Taco? Yeah, so like, good luck. Yeah, Amish comedians, they're like jokes about heavy blankets. Yeah, heavy blankets. You know, different types of wood. What is this? What is this, pine? I'd say it's an alder.

Yeah. Poplar. You know what's a poplar wood? Pine. That's pretty good. That's as good as any Amish joke. Horse and carriage road rage. Wouldn't they all know each other, too?

Yeah. This is how Jebediah does it. Yeah. Jebediah drives a cart like this. They do, instead of penis jokes, they do barn-sized jokes. Yeah. Yeah. She sure raises my barn.

No, literally. She's got a good back. Yeah. No, literally. She's got a good back. Yeah. So now this next one comes from Greg R. in Mammoth Lakes, California. The biggest lakes there are.

This overheard comes from last year's L.A. County Book Fair. I was working setting up and taking down the different booths. At the end of the fair, one of the booths I took down was for the Church of Scientology. I was helping a lovely young lady who was in charge of putting away her leftover Scientology books. She was pretty upset that they had sold hardly any books

and the large amount she had left over. Later, I heard her talking on the phone, saying, Yes, yes, sir. Everything went great. Uh-huh. We sold all the books. Now I've got to buy all these books from myself.

Yes, sir. Everything's going according to plan. Best day ever, sir. Is that a thing? I think that's a thing in Scientology is you do have to, like, pay for everything. Oh, yeah. You can, at least with, you know, the Bible, you do have to pay for everything. At least with the Bible, you can find

it anywhere for free. Scientology, I think you get the free personality test. Yeah, but then at the end you have to buy a subscription to Dianetics. You gotta buy a new personality. They're like, your personality test came through. Stinker.

But we can help you. Nobody likes you. Do you think anyone's ever gone through the personality test and like, oh, you're great. You're the bomb.com. That's one of the settings on our personality. There's nothing we can do to help you.

In fact, if you started a religion, I might be. Yeah. Jeffology. Jeffology. Now, this last one comes from New York City from Mary M. Americans. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

No Canadian overheards? Nope. Come on, Canadians. They didn't bring the heat this week. We're real tight-lipped. This is overheard on the streets of New York City late on a Friday night. These are two fratty dudes. Fratty dude number one.

Man, she was hearty. Fratty dude number two. Yeah, I bet you she eats a lot of stew. Well, stew is hearty. Yeah, absolutely. She sticks to your ribs that's that's like a compliment and that sounded like they were it was a very positive thing yeah yeah it wasn't a negative thing well they maybe they were talking about uh an all-female moving company oh yeah she knows her way around a bread bowl oh man like is a is a waitress sad when like you just eat the insides

of the bread bowl and like i'm finished like i didn't eat any of the bread like i just wanted to in a bread bowl because i like the way it looks yeah but i don't want to eat the bowl yeah i'm on atkins i saved the bowls up and then if i have to go to a wedding, I give them as a set. Red bowls. I'm registered at Swiss Chalet. Are either of you guys going to weddings this summer? I wish. I am. Are you?

Going, forced, same thing. Are you on the hook for a present? I believe I will maybe have to pay some money. No, I probably won't. Okay. I'm going to try not to, but may have to. Is it a friend of your girlfriend?

Yes. Yeah. So, but I'm going to pretend I'm on that show where I critique everyone's wedding. Oh, sure. Oh, yeah. Poor weddings. I'm going to do shit on everything. That's pretty much it.

And then that bride gets to just come out and hang out at your house. And criticize your cheese plate. I think my girl was just seeing how I react at a wedding to see my monitor. What's in it for, aside from that they can win a thing, does the show pay for the weddings

so that you have these three strangers at your wedding mocking you? Yeah, you win a honeymoon. A honeymoon. So the other people on the show haven't planned like one person's getting a honeymoon and the rest are like, we should have made a plan B. I guess we're going camping.

Not only do they not win anything but the very beginning of their marriage is critiqued to the point of patheticness and then they lose as a couple to the point of patheticness. Yeah. And they lose as a couple. Yeah. That's right. Yes.

I wonder what, good luck. Yeah. How many of those couples stay married? Oh yeah. I'm guessing not. That's gotta be in the zero percentile. Cause uh,

yeah, it can't be good. It's like going on the amazing race as a, as a new couple. Like let's test the metal of our relationship by doing something fucking crazy. I auditioned for that.

Didn't get on. Really? Yeah. Oh, yeah, you and comedian Carter Horton. Yeah, and we just, the tape was crap. It was terrible.

Unless he admitted at one point that he couldn't travel outside of the country. I'm like, that won't help us. The amazing race. I'm like, that won't help us. The Amazing Race. I hope it's local.

Yeah. Next time we're going to exploit every weakness we have in our family. Yeah, it's like The Amazing Race. I warn you,

I cannot get on an airplane. Now, in addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls if you want to call us. Our phone number is 206- 339-8328. Hey, Graham and Dave. I'm a mailman

out here in Seattle. I'm an African-American gentleman. I'm just stating that because it has something to do with the story. And so, I'm an African-American gentleman. I'm just stating that because it has something to do with the story. And so I'm delivering mail to this house, and a woman walks up with her daughter and says, Hey, oh, I'm glad I caught you. She has some outgoing mail.

She hands me the mail, and then she tells the daughter to say, Say hi to the mailman. And the daughter goes, I'm mixed. And then the mom pauses for a second and says, I said say hi to the mailman. And then she says, hi, I'm mixed. Cute. cute like the kid's got a very specific identity that uh she's working with i didn't realize you could give mail to the mailman yeah i don't think they like it oh really they want to do it yeah that seems like what about those mailboxes that have the flag and like are you supposed to put it up and it goes up and down and you put it up if you – If you have mail going out.

So you don't have to actually go out all the time. Yeah. Right. But yeah, like I – because like you only have the bag that you're carrying, right? Yeah. So if somebody is like, here's a package. You're like, oh, fucking Jesus. Like now I got to carry this around.

And sendings and rocks. Yeah, exactly. Big bag of rocks. I've never done that. I don't think I ever would because I don't actually know who my mail carrier is. Yeah. I try to avoid. Yeah.

Like I've never done the like – what are you supposed to leave a bottle? That's very guessing that they're not a recovering alcoholic leaving a bottle of liquor for them. Like, there you go. I'm embarrassed to see my mailman from all the stuff that's sent to me. He knows too much of my biz. I don't like it. He knows when it says pay immediately. He knows how things are going.

Yeah, exactly. He's not expecting a present. Like if he was a gossip, it would be awful. Another final notice. How many final notices do they send? This is like Cher's farewell tours. There's a million of them. Here's your next phone call.

Hey, Dave and Graham and stimulating guests. You're welcome. This is Jarrett in St. Louis. I just remembered an overheard from my boss at work from a couple weeks ago. He was talking to one of my coworkers, and all I heard him say was, yeah, the guillotine was a fantastic invention. Yeah. Why is that wrong?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, in terms of, like, volume. Yeah. Yeah, like, yeah. Easy. Yeah. Like, yeah. Easy disposal. It was first embedded to slice meat. And, like, hold on a minute.

A very tough cut. Yeah, like that. It was literally neck meat. Exactly. So, it used to be just a guy with an axe, like, hoping that he. Oh, when he says guillotine, I'm only thinking of the automatic. Yeah. Like the Venetian blind thing. Yeah, like you flush a toilet.

It's that type of movement. Oh, I see. You pull up the thing to bring up the blade and then let go. It was high-end. It was like a high-end. Your version was we can't afford... Yeah, because it used to... It was just the manual. It was just a guy... And he had to be good because like it used to like here's just the manual it was just a guy

chop like and he had to be good because like ah it's gonna take a couple chops to get through this i'm sure it happened all the time early form of wrestling by putting the mask over there too yeah i wonder if the crowd because you know if you're going to a beheading like it's like when you go to see nascar you're like hoping there's a car crash. Like, when you see a beheading, you're like, well, I hope this is like a four whack. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Like, I hope this is, come on, Gallagher. I hope I'm not screaming. Gallagheresque. Yeah, the first four rows

were ponchos. Yeah, that's exactly it. It's lucky if we get blood on us. But you would also know who the guy is with the mask.

I mean, the communities weren't so big to be like, hey, his body looks like Igor. Yeah. He's the only guy that we don't see down at the market. How does he make a living?

How does he make his money? That's exactly right. I never see him work. He's the only one. Hey, why isn't that guy watching the show? You think he's like Spider-Man? Yeah. He's like just a bad at keeping his identity. Yeah, and sometimes

he would upside down kiss the people before he chopped their heads off. Yeah. He'd whisper something in their ear. That would be my touch if I did it. It'd be like, you're going to a better place. Something like that. Oh, where's the executioner? I don't know. Let me just go into this phone booth.

It feels like the executioners in movies would have big leather-like wrists. What are these called? Like cuffs. Yeah. What was that? Was that just a – They were Chippendale dancers. Yeah.

Yeah, they were often pretty muscly guys, I guess. I think they used it for sponsorship and stuff like that. You look closely. Yeah, sure. You're like... Home Depot. Yeah, Steeds. Exactly.

Mustang. It's his horse, Franz. Yeah. You can advertise here. Yeah. Get in on that. Golden Palace. Yeah, like that's the last thing that a guy getting his head cut off is like, oh.

Oh, no, Jesus is coming. Chopsy hot dogs. It was a thing like you would cut off the head and it would still be live for a second or something. Yeah, yeah. And the body would run around. And that's what Benny Hill wrote that song. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. body would run around and that's what benny hill wrote that song yeah here's your final phone call hi dave and graham this is gary i am calling from uh south pasadena

and i am calling with an overheard so yesterday i was at the farmer's market with my lovely family going to her car and walked by a guy on the phone. I didn't actually look until I heard him talk. And what he said was, yeah, she loves me. It's my nose. Yeah, everybody loves my nose. And I looked over and it was a teenage boy talking on the phone and you know he had an okay nose but it wasn't anything special he's wrong

there's something special about it he can smell truffles or something I don't know if I would know maybe he does have a great nose I don't know if I would recognize that in another man yeah like who's got a good nose i don't know if i would recognize that in another man yeah like who's got a good nose dustin hoffman yeah adrian brody well like is it a note is a nose uh like something like an owen wilson where it has a specific character like because that's the most famous like if you

had a lineup of noses and like before a movie you're watching oh yeah i guess the nose uh i guess the nose you would know you know who these noses are yeah who knows well you would know owen wilson right away and then i don't then i kind of like george clooney i wouldn't know him but i'm sure he has a great nose i must have pretty great well shouldn't a good nose be unnoticeable right yeah it's only the weird ones that you notice I'm not looking at your noses and I'm disturbed they're the oddest things if you really look at them

no isolation on the nose it's super weird it's wrong and the face is like the nose is like the starring attraction yeah it's the window of the face it is the nose is the vacuum of the face. It is. It is. Yeah.

The nose is the vacuum of the soul. It is. It's the furthest point on my body, sad as that sounds. I'm going to go through a Stargate. Yeah. Nose first. A portal. I just stick my nose in and smell.

No, not for me that's true that world's not any good the yeah I'm trying to I'm still like stymied trying to come up well Barbra Streisand

famous nose yeah I mean like people have Bob Hope had a yeah his is like a WC Fields

yeah Jimmy Durante Jimmy Durante Jimmy Durante but really right now we in Hollywood Owen Owen Wilson's famous nose-wise. Sarah Jessica Parker. Oh, yeah. She's got a schnoz, you would say.

But it's not... No one who has a famous nose really has a beautiful nose. No, yeah, yeah. Nothing where you're like... You're right. First. Well, I think the only person who could probably answer this is an Eskimo. I think they know what it is.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I think they would be like, that's a hot nose. Yeah? That hot one. Oh, yeah, Kristen, she kisses really well. Yeah, I don't like Kristen. Well, her Eskimo kisses are delightful. And noses, it depends which angle.

If you're looking at somebody taller, even more disturbing. Yeah. Because you're like looking into the brain. I don't like that at all. I'm like, what's going on in there? One time I was at a basketball game and the cameraman was right in front of me. And so I looked up to see if I was on the screen. And looking up, I just saw into my nose.

I was on the screen. Inside Dave Schumke Yeah It is Oh man I uh Yeah What's

Who's the Who's it Voldemort He doesn't have a nose Yeah Cryptkeeper He don't got no nose That's right

Those would be Yeah Those would be the two bonus rounds He'd be great on one of those Makeover shows The Cryptkeeper Like I think people Could really help him out

Oh like he's the guy Getting a makeover I thought he was the guy P apart the overspanked ruler. Yeah. Try some cobwebs in your hair. Put some acid on your head. They all look like him at the end. You're beautiful.

Put some acid on your head. Oh, my God. Oh, well, that brings us to the end of the show. Sean, do you have anything upcoming that you would like to plug? No, really? No. I'll be driving cab four days a week in Victoria. That's pretty good.

Tuesday through Saturday. And if people, you're online, you're on Twitter. Yeah, Twitter's my, I like going Twitter. Very funny on Twitter. Yeah, Twitter's my, I like going Twitter. Very funny on Twitter. Yeah, it's fun. I finally learned how to write in 140 or less characters. It takes a while. And you're at ProudlovingCat?

ProudlovingCat. I share it with my cat. She started the account. I mostly use it now. She just asks for food. A lot of mooching on her. Yeah. That's her tweets.

It's like, has anybody tried the new whiskers? Exactly. Get at me. And you have a website? Yeah, website. I haven't been to it in four years myself. Oh, man. Go check it out.

Yeah, check out my upcoming gigs. Cobweb page on there. That's right. Your upcoming dates was just a bunch of spiderwebs. Yeah, spiderwebs. That's right. Your upcoming dates was just a bunch of like spiderwebs. Yeah, it was spiderwebs. That's exactly it. Picture of my wallet with a moth coming out. Like that.

But yeah, I'm here and there. It's fairly easy to track me down. Yeah. So Proud Loving Cat. Check it out because it's very funny. And if you get a chance to see Sean perform stand-up live, hysterical. It can be. It can be.

It could be the awfulest thing you've ever seen in your life, or I can shuck and jive. Yep. And we're going to Montreal this year, actually. I heard you're going to Montreal as well. That's right, yes. And do you know what show you're on? I don't. I know I'm there in the second week.

Okay. That's what I've narrowed it down to. So I still don't know what I'm doing. Yeah. There's a whole gaggle. Yeah, a lot of us. Vancouver people. Ivan Decker and Charlie Demers.

Eric Sigurdsson. We're all going and never coming back. That's exactly it. I'm going to have steamies forever. And I'll just be here. Yeah. No, Dave, come along. Okay.

I'm sure they're sending a bus for us. Yeah, exactly. Dave, anything to plug? no no no you know where to find me yeah

Shumka and cat Shumka and dog yeah and Graham you? yep I will be in Calgary June 27th at Lolita's Lounge

and then the 28th and 29th at the Artesian in Regina, Saskatchewan. That's about it. That's all the news that is fit to print. And if you like the show, why don't you head over to MaximumFun.org and check out the blog recap that Dave does each and every week. Photos and videos relating to the content of this podcast. Yeah, I wonder what I'll put up.

I don't know. Maybe something about man versus food. Oh yeah, sure. Yeah. Maybe something with pudding skin. Maybe a guillotine. Which is great to cut pudding skin with. It cuts it nice and close. If you want to get in touch with us, it's

spy at maximumfun.org or 206-339-8328. If you like the show, come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself.