Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 436 - Eddie Della Siepe

Episode Date: July 25, 2016

Comedian Eddie Della Siepe returns to talk sugar, small town weddings, and big city theatre.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 436 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man I haven't seen for a couple weeks and I'm super glad to see him again, Mr. Dave Shumka. Hey bud, good to see you too.

Good times, welcome back. Great oldies. The last three episodes were recorded in three days. Yeah. And then we took weeks off, three weeks apart, two weeks apart. At least two weeks. And we're back. So many, so much catching up to do.

Yeah, we both traveled abroad. And, you know, I found that no matter where you go, homeless wears the heart. Yeah, I went to three places. I went to eat. Yeah. Then I went to pray. Oh. Then I went to love.

I do it all at the same place. Oh. McDonald's. Well, you do have the play place. You call it the pray place. And our guest today, returning guest on the podcast, very funny comedian, host of his own podcast that I am currently forgetting the name. Barely friending.

Yeah. Mr. Eddie Della Seppi, is there? Yeah. Hey. What's up, guys, good to be back Good to have you back Welcome Hi Edward

Edmundo Yes You just learned that Yeah, and then I lost it You know, I'm garbage in, garbage out Is that what I mean? Thank you Should we get to know us?

Sure Get to know us sure get to know us uh i don't think that's what i meant well i don't know what that saying is well no that's like uh i that's uh i only know it from like video production of like you you shoot garbage right in the field you can't fix it in editing. My name is Garbage. My identity is Garbage. That's not what I meant. That doesn't apply here. Well, although, you know, it's crazy.

I was sitting with an editor just this week, and you can now just zoom in on a shot and make a shot that was wide a close-up just with the editing software. You could before before but it just didn't look good now it looks just like you you meant to shoot that so i'm like well then why would you shoot anything except uh the master and then just do it all in post yeah huh yeah is that a question to me yeah yeah your thoughts why would you do that i don don't know. Now, it's been about probably a year since you were here, too.

I think it might be two. No. That can't be right. Maybe a year and a half. Nothing changes. Well, you had just moved down to... It could have been two weeks. Yeah, it could have been two weeks.

You had just moved down to L.A. the last time. Yeah, and I just started my podcast at that point. And now you're the king of LA. The king. Yeah. The clown prince of LA. When will he be back? And how's everything going down there?

It's going good. The podcast is doing really well. Yeah. How can you tell? Well, dad. We're eight years in and we don't know. Yeah, we're not sure. We're starting to chart, which is good.

In the States. So we're in like the, we hit as high as number four. That's pretty good. Yeah. So, and then we're like on the main banner on the iTunes comedy page for a podcast. There you go. Yeah. So we're doing all right.

That's good. We signed with HeadGum, which is Jake and Amir's podcast label. Okay. So it's been good. And then the hopes is to like, sort of like, eventually get live shows down and be like you guys.

Jake and Amir are, they're originally started kind of as an online. Yeah, on CollegeHuman. Thing. Yeah, it's all online.

It's all online. This is an online thing. No, but I was on a show with them at Just for Laughs and I was like, who? Right.

They're the original pranksters. Wait, no, As I was like, who? They're the original pranksters. Wait, no. Ashton Kutcherner. He's the original prankster. No, no, no. Did you say Kutcherner? Yeah. From Kutcherner.

Someone from the Kutcherner. Kutcherner, Ontario. No, it would be Alan Funt. Isn't he the original prankster? Sure. If we're being, you know, some would say that you know, that snake in the Garden of Eden original prankster.

Yeah, that's true. Hey, check out this group. I don't like pranks. Why? I'm not a big prank guy. You've never, have you been a victim of a prank? Um, yeah. Maybe that's why. No, I don't particularly like them either and I feel like every time somebody starts telling me a story about a prank they did, I'm like, the person that you did this to felt really bad.

I feel like pranking is just really organized, well thought out bullying. It's like, let's get this and this and he'll walk in and he'll step in that and we'll be like, heh heh. Yeah, that's basically what it is. I don't know. I don't like it. I find that one person's clearly been victimized and everyone just laughs at this person. I don't know. I don't like it. I find that one person's clearly been victimized, and everyone just laughs at this person. I don't know. I find it kind of odd.

What's the prank that you got pranked? Or punked, depending on what area you're from. I'm kind of an original prankster. It's kind of like one of those things where you walk in, and someone just shoots. I think someone threw water at me, and water at me and that is not a prank that's not that is just straight up bullying but i walked in and i got pepper spray it could have been a woman's home i wasn't really sure why did she prank me her and her husband So Yeah like I've I've only been

Pranked like April Fool's Day style I've never been like elaborately Really? No I don't think so The one I'm Like The one I would do

I still am tempted to always do Is just Like to To either Shoot someone Jump out of nowhere Yeah And go

And make the person go That's classic prank Like to either Shoot someone Jump out of nowhere Yeah And go Yeah And make the person go That's a classic prank Mostly to Dracula Yeah Or to If I'm with someone And we're walking

And like A wall or a post Comes between us I will then hide behind it Like we're walking Side by side And then suddenly I'm gone Oh that's fun

But that's like That's like a fun Like in a montage of a relationship that would be like a fun yeah to see like this is a fun relation if someone pranked me like that while i was holding a coffee or something it spilled all over me then it becomes the prank becomes like oh you just ruined my day but how would i mean that's on you the spilling the coffee is it kind of wait wait how i jumped out of a tree and scared me i spilled coffee yeah you're right that's on you, the spilling the coffee. Is it? Kind of. Wait, wait. Someone jumped out of a tree and scared me? I spilled coffee. Yeah, you're right.

That is on them. That's on you. You should have a steady hand at all times. One time, someone did the thing where they hide next to a doorway, and they jump out when you walk through. My original reaction was just to grab them by the throat. Oh, my God. I didn't like leap back and then get mad. It was just like throat grab,

like grab. And I felt, I felt pretty good at first. All right. I didn't look the fool, but then I was, I didn't like myself for a little while. Now you look the murderer. If no one saw the prank part and they just saw you grabbing a guy's neck, like, wow, that guy's got a weird handshake.

Well, you guys have an appointment at HR. I do like the videos of pranks where somebody scares somebody and then they punch them in the face. Oh, the best. Yeah, those are the best. The best a couple of weeks ago because there's all these pranks of someone, you know, going through the drive-thru. Oh, yeah. With a hidden camera. Oh, they'll, they'll do something and prank the minimum wage employees, which ha ha. Yeah.

Ha ha. Punched up guys. When there's a hint of violence, I saw someone's, uh, some of them online where this guy was like, watch this and take these like kind of thugs that are walking around New York and pulls up their pants. And I guess, what are you doing? and tries to punch them and chase them i'm like that's not cool no that's just starting a fight yeah basically but the one a couple weeks ago was this guy going through ed had just bought a dollar coke or whatever yeah and was paying with

his card i love this and then he honks his super loud truck horn and the girl says you're not getting your drink throws his card back in the truck throws his coke at him just yeah just tips it like so that it gets all over oh my god it's the best yeah oh coke i haven't had a coke in a while we were talking about that yeah yeah oh yeah that's right you're going completely sugar free i can't like it oh my god well you could have a coke zero no why that doesn't have sugar in it yeah it's got some fucking weird chemicals i've never heard of yeah you got me you sold me i'll take it yeah it's got space age so you're you're when you go to a restaurant say

and fast food is the worst because oh yeah the sugar in the meat. But like the, sweet meat. Sweet meat. All the meals come with a pop. Right. So what do you get with your meal? Just water. The water. Is that the same price? Just a bottle. They give you a bottle?

Yeah. Uh, they might. I'm not sure how much it is. And so, and say you go to a nice fancy sit down place, just water as well? Yeah.

Water. Yeah. Water. Yeah. I always feel bad. I'm like, this is going to really, I haven't had a, like a, is there sugar in like wine? Yeah. Water. Yeah. I always feel bad. I'm like, this is going to really. I haven't had like a.

Is there sugar in like wine? Yeah. Alcohol is sugar. Oh yeah. Alcohol is sugar. Of course. I haven't had like, like a can of Coke or Pepsi in like maybe five or six years. What?

Yeah. Oh, so this was, that was way before you went on. Yeah. How come? I dated a girl that was a dental hygienist and she was like, you know, it just breaks down the enamel so much that your teeth will just get just killed. It would just be unprotected teeth eventually. And then you're like, let's have some unprotected teeth.

Let's have some unprotected teeth. Speaking of. The worst part is dental hygienist always makes you wear a dental dam. Yeah. Wear one. Do you ever drink like those? Wear one. Do you ever drink like those It's like one of those ones That holds your mouth Whatever Batman isn't covering

Whatever Robocop doesn't have covered It's a dental dent Do you ever have those Like fancy Mexican Cokes That Are like Natural sugar

I've had a sip of those And they actually taste And but it does feel like Oh this is good for me People have told me In the states that And this is true I've tasted a little

Difference The Oreos Uh In the states Taste different Than the ones in Canada Really? Yeah

Like sweeter? Uh They taste better They taste not as sweet as the American ones. Huh. And you like Canada better. The Canada Oreos are better. And I have a friend that's, who's from Canada that ships

his Oreos, who loves Oreos, ships them from Canada to the States. Yeah, we're sponsored by a company that does, that ships Oreos to the States. Do you know Oreos are vegan? What? Yeah. Oh, I thought I was sure that the cream had cream in it. Or some sort of horse hooves.

Yeah, it wouldn't have dairy. It seems dairy, but you can't have it. But something worse. You know, I figured Oreos has the worst thing. 100% horse hoof. It doesn't have dairy in it, but it has Gary in it. Oh, no. I'm off of Gary. Trying to ease up on Gary. It doesn't have dairy in it, but it has Gary in it. Oh, no. Yeah.

I'm off of Gary. Trying to ease up on Gary. But the whole no sugar thing has been very trying for sure. Yeah. Like, how long do you think you'll be able to keep it up? I don't know. Like, that first week, my buddy had a malt milkshake, and I couldn't stop thinking about it for days. That's what would break me. For days. For being something like a milkshake. I couldn't stop thinking about it for days. That's what would break me.

For days. Would be something like a milkshake. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I was like, oh my God, that must taste so good. And when I think about something like that, I can't stop thinking about it until I have it. Like a milkshake? Can't. I can't. Milkshake.

Women. Exactly. Yeah. He's like Scarface. Yeah. The world and everything in it. That's what I want. But no, like something like a milkshake,

like the second that I think about it, like, boy, that would be good. Then I can't switch that up. I love milkshakes, dude. Yeah, I only... Like a malt milkshake? Ugh. What's that?

Yeah, I'm... I don't know, man. Go ahead. Just say malt, and I'm just like, yeah. Malt me. What's a malt milkshake? What's the difference between that and just a milkshake? Do you know, Dave?

I don't know, but if anyone out there knows, just reply to Eddie, because I don't care. Just tweet Eddie. Yeah, and I'll forward it to the malt lobby that supports Hillary Clinton. The malt lobby? So there's just an ad for malt? Malt. We're not sure what it is either that's why yeah it's a powerful lobby all these malts are killing people and people are just sending thoughts and prayers no one wants to say anything that's right yeah exactly nobody wants to take away my malt now i'm like for my cold literally cold hands i uh now i'm like daydreaming about like desserts it's crazy what's the one that's like the dessert peanut butter cream pie from house

of pies in los angeles peanut butter cream pie amazing so what is it just graham's allergic yeah so i don't i don't know from peanut butter Oh really Yeah It's just a cream pie It's kind of like coconut cream pie But it's like Okay It's so good

And uh Yours would be ice cream I assume Yeah Um And mine is just malt Just a big bowl of malt Oh man

You know with your lovely lady And you just smear malt on her Yeah yeah yeah Just pour a big bag Or jug Of malt B jug of malt bags of malt oh yeah we uh i've been craving milkshakes a lot lately and i i had a couple this week what's the best one in vancouver do you think oh i just make my own oh in a blender with quick you're making the tub like a bootlegger? That's what I do. Like a big paddle?

Big batches of milkshake? Yeah. Yeah. I don't know the best. There's a good, like, soda fountain in Burnaby that has, like, I think it's, it'll do, like, classical, you know, an egg cream and milkshake. Oh, yeah. And, like, you look outside and it's like the Marty McFly's inventing the skateboard.

Yeah. Every houring the skateboard. Yeah. Every hour on the hour. There's a place on Granville that's really good called the Templeton. Their milkshakes are delicious. Really? This is not helping me. No, I know. Why did you ask?

Hey, Lucy's. It's not hard to make a delicious one. You just need ice cream and some flavoring. Yeah. That's true. And milk. But, like, how long are you hoping to go? A month?

A year? I don't know. How long have you been off sugar? It's been two weeks now. I can't believe it. I don't think I could go. I can't believe it's not sugar. Don't get me wrong.

Like, you know, everything has sugar. Like, ketchup has sugar. Everything has sugar. So, you've been putting ketchup on everything? Yes. Can I have a ketchup milkshake? Yeah. I've been ketchupizing everything has sugar. So you've been putting ketchup on everything? Yes. Can I have a ketchup milkshake? Yeah. Ketchup-izing

everything I can. Sometimes you just sit there with a bottle of ketchup. May I? And I hold like a bottle of wine. But you'll have ketchup. Yeah. You're just avoiding sweets. I'm avoiding desserts. I'm starting there because I think if I went to cold turkey, I would crack easier. I'm starting there. Cause I think if I went to cold Turkey, I would crack easier.

So I'm trying to like. What about candy? No. No candy. No candy. No sweets. No candy. No soda.

Cause you are already off soda. Those are the three main ones. I don't know if it's so much like a dietary thing, but it's mostly like a willpower thing. I don't know. I'm going to try and test myself. I don't know. Cause I feel like I'm so uh intertwined with this as part of my day like i always get sweets all the time yeah i can't not have something sweet

there's times where i couldn't go to bed without chocolate it was so weird yeah but like you don't do you don't really drink no and you don't uh you're not a drug user i mean i'll have some drinks here there but yeah i'm not drug but so like a little bit of candy seems like it's not that bad, but maybe it's the worst one to have of the bunch. I don't know. I've done that before where I've gone, I don't know, a month or two without sweets and it does make it easier to then moderate them. Right. Because like, I don't drink pop at all, but I'll go to Wendy's and the meal comes with a pop. You're losing money if you don't get a pop.

Yeah, that's right. And then I'll have two sips of it and that's plenty. I think maybe eventually I'll just have a dessert and it'll be the greatest thing ever. You know what I mean? Like it's like. Or it'll be too sweet. Yeah, it'll be too sweet. How did I ever like this?

My life is over. Now you're a vegetarian. Yeah. Are you vegan? No. But mostly because I'm like allergic to nuts. So I can't. And most of the vegan stuff, like the sub in is all nut based.

How allergic are you to nuts? I'm allergic enough. To die? Yeah. Really? Like you have an EpiPen on you? No, those are too expensive. Is EpiPen membership last?

Yeah. What does an EpiPen cost? I think they're like, well, it might be cheaper now because now they're trying to like market them to people for some reason. But they used to be like about like $100 and they would only last for two months. Oh, okay. And then you'd have to go get like, they're not, they don't last very long. Oh, really?

Yeah. The epinephrine or whatever does like. We'll get you a subscription. But then now they're like i was flipping through a magazine and they're trying to market epi pens and i'm like that's because i've been told i saw tv commercials for them yeah blue to the sky orange to the thigh yeah like just to get just to get a jump on your day yeah Yeah. Have an EpiPen with your cup of coffee. But I was told by several doctors that if you use them with any regularity,

the effect wears off. Right, like anything. Yeah. Your body gets... So I don't know why they're trying to mark them. What's your worst reaction ever been to something you're allergic to? Do you swell up?

Yeah, it was when I was a little kid, and I guess I used to be, and I'm not anymore. I grew out of that allergy. I was allergic to eggs. Eggs? Yeah, my aunt fed me like a hard-boiled egg. Well, because they're incredible and edible. Yeah, I know. Get cracking, everybody.

Are you part of the egg lobby? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I work for a malt. He's in big malt. But yeah, I had to go, like, I turned, you know, turned blue and had to go to the hospital. Did they have to cut you out of your clothes? I think I was a baby at the time, so I probably was naked. They cut me out of my diaper.

Cut his diaper. But there's, probably was naked no they cut me out of my diaper cut his diaper but there's a you just yeah cut it uh yeah so that's probably the worst i've never heard of anyone allergic to eggs because it's oh it's interesting but i've uh i've grown out of that one and the allergists they said oh you'll grow out of all these allergies by the time you're 20 you won't be allergic to any of these things. Wow. I'm allergic to more things. I've gained allergies as time goes on. I think as the society You're in the black for allergies. Oh, absolutely. Yeah.

Oh, man. My quarterly report is looking real good. Quarterly allergy report. How many swell ups? Sweet. Oh, yeah. And the last time I got tested, I set a clinic record. For speed and severity.

Did they take your picture and put it on the wall? No, but the allergist. Speed and severity? Yeah, like opened the door and said, somebody bring me a stopwatch. Because I swelled up so fast. They were like, oh, my God, I've never seen anything like that. Wow. Come on, guy.

Learn to use the watch app that. Wow. Yeah. Come on, guy. Learn to use the watch app on your phone. Yeah. Yeah, you're my doctor. You're still using stuff like this? So when they do the allergy test, I took it a long, long time ago, but those little cuts, right? Yeah, they do a little scratch. A little scratch. See how your skin reacts. Yeah. Oh, and they

circle it and they'll be like, look. Yeah. This was, wait, this was blueberry? No. Oh, darn. We was, wait, this was, blueberry? No. Oh, darn, we should have labeled these. Okay, we gotta do it again. Let's do it again. And then your whole body's cut. I have no space left.

Cut him out of his diaper. According to this reaction, you're allergic to henna. Yeah. Yeah, so you allergic to anything? Ragweed. Ragweed. Can't have it. I hate it.

I love it. I love it with a side of steak. You go to Ragweed with a side of steak? You go to some of these rootsy, foragey restaurants. You'll get some dandelion. Is the Ragweed fresh? Yes. Yeah. Real fresh. You go to some of these rootsy, foragey restaurants, you'll get some dandelion. Is the ragweed fresh? Ugh.

Yes. Yeah. Real fresh. Yeah, look at my eyes. Yeah, it's been plucked from a soccer field. That is one. Has anyone seen ragweed? I don't even know what it looks like.

No, me neither. It's just the pollen that I'm, like, allergic to. Aside from dandelions, I don't know what any weeds look like. They all look like just plants. And from my experience, I only think they grow out of sidewalks. Pretty much. That's their natural. But I hear my doctor told me that now you're severely allergic to ragweed.

And Southern Ontario has the highest density of ragweed in all of North America. Oh, really? I was like, oh, sweet. But you don't live there anymore. You're like, I gotta get out of here. No, but at the time, it was hell. I was like, I had to take, I had to take a, get a shot once a month for the whole summer just to have immunity for pollen, when the pollen is at its peak during September.

Really? Just to get immunity for it. Just to like, so that you could go outside. Just so I can go outside. I'm Googling ragweed. And what it looks like? Yeah. Yeah.

Ragweeds are flowering plants in the genus Ambrosia. Ooh. Sounds cool. It does sound very cool. Deadly to the eyes. It looks like this. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, green. But I... Why are you so surprised it looked like a regular plant? Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's what I mean is I don't understand the difference between a flower and a weed. Oh, you should see my backyard. You can tell I don't

know the difference. I know what morning glory is. You don't know the difference between a flower and a weed? No. So if you gave a woman a bouquet of... Well, no one's selling weeds. But they might as well. I don't know the difference. Do you know the difference. I don't know the difference.

Do you know the difference? I don't know the difference between a bush or a fern. If it's flowery, it's a flower. Although Morning Glory has these nice white flowers, but it just wraps itself around everything and

kills stuff. And then there's also these... It never goes away. It just wraps itself around everything and kills stuff. And then there's also these. It never goes away. What are they called? My old boss said they were so hard to get rid of, and they were like these tiny little flowers. They would grow just in amongst grass. But they look like flowers, but they're not. They're like. So is a flower something that you want to be around?

Yeah, yeah. A weed is just a flower that hasn't become, you know... Public enemy number one. Yeah. It's like a gang-affiliated flower. Yeah. I mean, just... It's all marketing.

The name ragweed is like, get rid of it. Yeah. Yeah. Because in Vancouver, we have the cherry blossoms, which are very nice to look at. Right. But also people are, a lot of people are allergic to them. And when they fall down, then they.

They stick to your paint on your car. Yeah. And they become, they become mulchy and gross. And slippery. Right. Yeah. Yeah. So, but like.

But they're pretty enough for long enough that we like. Yeah. That people are like, that's a, that would be like. Touristic photos. But also they come out of like trees. Yeah, that people are like, that would be like a flower. But also, they come out of like trees. Yeah,

yeah, yeah. So we know trees aren't weeds. For sure. Trees are just really strong weeds. Yeah.

I think weeds are like the bodybuilders of weeds. I think weeds are kind of, they're like parasites. They kill other plants and they take over.

Oh, maybe that's it Yeah I see But ragweed is like My big one So like my eyes Will get watery

And cats Largely cats too Yeah Are they weeds? They're weeds They're the weeds of pets Do you find I've just found that

Everybody seems to have a cat Have you noticed That Because you're You're a single man Yeah Right You go on dates Yeah Does every girl you'd go on a date with have a cat. Have you noticed that because you're a single man, right? You go on dates. Does every girl you'd go on a date with have a cat? Maybe it's a Vancouver thing.

Yeah, maybe it's a Vancouver thing. Oh, every girl that I meet seems to have a cat. Really? Yeah. Or maybe cat women are attracted to you. I mean, cat woman-wise. Yeah, sure. Well, Eartha Kitt.

Why that far back?, Eartha Kitt? Why that far back? Why Eartha Kitt? Is she still with us? Why Eartha? Yeah, I feel like there would have been. No,

I think she passed away. Recently? I think, I thought I saw her on like, I thought I saw her on the Oscars where they have like

tributes of people who passed away. Eartha Kitt was there. Like, oh, Catwoman. Oh, yeah yeah I think so one of the cat women

are still alive because there's Julie Newmar and the Eartha Kitt and there was a third Michelle Pfeiffer Michelle Pfeiffer that's right

Eartha Kitt died in 2008 oh on Christmas day that's why I didn't make the papers because all the headlines were Santa arrives

yeah people happy with presents except some people yeah um oh my god uh indians do they even know it's christmas oh yeah exactly tears are not enough is that at the same time period uh that was after yeah yeah okay do they know it's christmas was the first of those yeah when i first super groups when i first moved to los angeles my friend uh rent i rented out a room from him and he goes we have two cats is that okay i'm like i didn't know anyone in la

i was like the room was super cheap i was like sure but the for me it's not so much that there's cats but if it's carpeted then i'm really feeling it because the carpet just holds the dander like a sponge yeah and i'm just like it's, it's just overwhelming. Yeah. And how was it, living with two cats? It was the best. No. We got into so much mischief together. I can't believe we solved that murder.

Yeah. Get in there. Find out what they're saying. Come back with this recorder. Eddie and the cat. I don't mind it. Yeah. It does sound like a fun. Eddie and the cat? Yeah. Yeah. We all have little fedoras on. Yeah. It does sound like a fun...

Any in the cat? Yeah. Yeah. We all have little fedoras on. Yeah, it's a fun kid's book. But like when I... A series. Series.

Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. I wouldn't want to go for long. Yeah. But yeah, so like, you know, if I wanted to go into somewhere and infiltrate a building, they'd go in like, what's this dumb cat doing here? I don't believe it.

It's doing nothing. They don't mind. And it's like riding something down its little paw. What's the big electronic thing around its neck? Don't worry about it. So we're going to rob the place of three, right? Everyone, say three. And say your name before you say three.

It's like, man, this writing is really bad for this show. We get it. It's a cat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everybody, touch the... The cat seems to be yeah, yeah. Everybody touch the... The cat seems to be wearing some kind of... Like fingerprint device. Everyone touch it and see if that's what it is.

Might as well. I mean, the cat brought it in. Meanwhile, what is Eddie doing? Is he just out in the van? I'm in the van with headphones. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In the van that's part of Bill's pizza. And you're always like,

oh, get out of there, whiskers, get, come on. It's always some weird company that like, how could this last? Like Johnny's Cleaning

or something like that. But why is Bill's Pizza parked outside for so long? Don't they have to make deliveries? I like the way that's the problem, not the cats

are like infiltrating this mob boss with fingerprint machines. I get that. But Bill's Pizza Should be out there That long Yeah

I mean usually They just have like A sedan Yeah Yeah Not a van And it's in and out They don't even

Pay for parking Um Uh We should write this down Yeah this is good You know what We're recording it Thank you

Twice as good Anyone listening to this Should honestly make A movie poster For Eddie and the Cats. Yeah. And send it to me. And then let's write the script for this. Yeah.

So you want somebody to do everything. Yeah. Make a movie poster. Yeah. Outsource, man. Yeah. Someone photoshopped a fake biopic poster about Stan Lee starring Bryan Cranston. Oh, yeah.

Did it look pretty like it looked pretty good but yeah but what's the ultimate goal like is do we want you know do we want enough internet uh heat to make this movie happen i don't i know it's it's gotta be i've always said like it's gotta be weird to be stan lee because he doesn't own these characters that he created that for a while i'm sure he was like yeah that's fine like they're not worth very you know they're worth some but they're not worth right billions and now they are worth billions right and i mean i think he's doing fine but it's got to be he's still the face of it he's still in these movies yeah but yeah but you know like it's don't you think it's kind of like when Disney's like. Well, they're going to stop making the movies when he dies.

Well, the linchpin, the best actor in all these movies is dead. I think that Stan Lee is almost like in a weird way a literary genius because we love these characters. Yeah. And we're still talking about them to this day. It's been like some of them are like 67 years old. Oh, no, it's 50 years old. Yeah. It's like crazy. Yeah. We love Wolverine's been like some of them are like 67 years old i know it's 50 years old yeah it's like crazy yeah i love we love wolverine we love like all we know all of them it's like to

come up come up with these many like characters that we all love it is weird it's crazy like because like dc had a couple of people like coming out with the superman and what are dc guys like superman batman aquaman wonder woman wonder woman and uh green lantern that's all i know Wonder Woman Wonder Woman and Green Lantern that's all I know and The Flash you know The Flash

oh The Flash yeah The Flash uh Zynga that's his catchphrase right the uh Big Bang Theory guy

yeah he wears a Flash shirt he loves The Flash but then meanwhile at Marvel one guy creates like all of the characters was it all Stanley

I'm not a he created The X-Men uh huh the x-men and spider man and the fantastic four and the hulk wow is that crazy yeah so like all the ones that you like wow fantastic four nobody likes clearly nobody likes the fantastic four that's nobody's favorite comic what are their names the fantastic four there's okay i don't know anything, so let me do it. Yeah, let Dave do it. Rockman?

Or Rocko. Thing. Is Thing Rockman? Yeah. There's Kate Mara. Jennifer Speed. What does she do? what's her power she's

fire fire fire shooter fire blaze fireplace fireplace not fireplace she's not a hearth although she is yeah um there's uh okay wait what do we have so far we've got rock man the thing i know i know what's the thing. Kate Mara as... As what did you call her? Jennifer Speedo or something? No. Fireblaze. Fireblaze.

Blaze. We've got Dr. Fantastic. Yeah. Who's in charge of Stretch. Yeah. Is it Mr.? Is it Dr.? Yeah, it's Mr.

But is he a doctor? Yes, he is. Then how does he go by Mr. Fantastic? That's a very good call. Yeah. On his driver's license, But is he a doctor? Yes, he is. Then how does he go by Mr. Fantastic? That's a very good call. Yeah. On his driver's license, he doesn't say doctor. I would love to write doctor on my driver's license, but good. And then, oh, wait, is there a fireman?

Yeah. Human torch. Human torch. Mr. Fireblaze? The thing. Human torch. Mrs. Invisible. Oh, she's invisible. Sue Thing. Human Torch. Mrs. Invisible. Oh, she's invisible.

Yeah. Sue Storm. Uh-huh. And then Mr. Fantastic. Why didn't it take off? Were the names crappy? Because they suck. What is it about them that sucks that makes them...

They all have superpowers like the rest of them. Is it they're just lame? The Thing is cool. The Silver Surfer is in the... He rises at some point yeah he's he he was his own thing he was like a delivery guy of a of an intergalactic being was he invented when the like surf guitar craze surfing craze most likely and like uh yeah i don't know but they just't know. Like, there were a bunch of scientists that all got these powers.

There's no like dark, Wolverine has this, where did he come from? Yeah, yeah. He was like abducted and became this superhuman soldier. And there's also in the X-Men world, they're like outcasts, right? Right. And in the Fantastic Four world, they become these things and everybody loves them. Like outcasts. Oh.

Yes. Yeah. Oh, also Iron Man. He he created iron man that's true so it's pretty crazy that yeah they had this one guy they i don't think they've created anything who's jack kirby is he the guy who shot lee harvey oswald oh that's jack ruby jack kirby i think jack kirby maybe created captain america okay i could be way wrong Jack Kirby I think Jack Kirby Maybe created Captain America Okay I could be way wrong

About that He's Marvel Marvel If we got any of this wrong Instead of writing us To correct us Maybe ask yourself Why you need to correct

Strangers on the internet Or go volunteer In your community Yeah Maybe talk to A therapist About these urges you have. Children comic books.

Yeah, go buy some comic books. Support the industry. Yeah. Captain America to me was always the laziest of the names. Yeah. Just that he's Captain

American. Yeah. What does he dress as? A flag. Yeah, they wouldn't even go for like Captain Patriot. Is there a Canadian version? There's like Captain Canuck

Really? Yeah Oh my god And there's a Canadian Alpha Flight Yeah they're like a wing of the X-Men And there's like a Sasquatch in there Yeah

And there's like a Justin Trudeau was in a recent issue Was he really? Yeah yeah And all of these None of these Have gone out of print Every single one of these

they still churn them out people still buy them Puck? that's Peter Puck he's a promotional hockey guy Harry Cole Bob Cole and Harry Neal are really good friends of them

yeah Puck is the immortal enemy of Don Rickles. Who else is an Apple flight? The Sasquatch guy? Yeah, those are the only two I remember. Listing comic book things is the number one thing to get people to write us corrections. I know, I know.

Yeah, we really are out of our depth. But it's crazy that Stan Lee, like, I mean, I guess he's like. Well, he didn't invent them all. In this issue, he didn't. Yeah. But he's, I guess he's famous and I guess he's doing fine. And he gets to be in all these movies as like a postman or whatever. Yeah.

Like, what are you doing there? Whoa, that guy sure is. Oh, boy. See, I can't even finish that line. Shows you what a genius he is, what an idiot I am. Yeah, boy. See, I can't even finish that line. Shows you what a genius he is, what an idiot I am. Yeah, yeah. But back then, there were so few comic book characters that you could just take anything and put man on the end of it. And that was...

Towel man. Yeah. Lazy man. Mattress boy. We gotta go. Yeah. Mattress boy. They're all things that are just around your bed.

Captain Pillow. The human alarm clock. I like the human alarm clock. What time is it? 6.30. We gotta go. We gotta go. Get up.

Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. All right. I'll snooze for a bit. I'll be back in nine minutes. My favorite is probably Wolverine.

Wolverine's my favorite. Yeah. I remember when I watched X-Men in the movie theater in Toronto and there was a, no, it was a Wolverine movie, like the Origins one. Yeah. And I think it was Striker was trying to recruit Wolverine to join the military. Yeah. And he's like, it's your duty as an American. And he's like, I'm Canadian and drove away.

The whole movie theater cheered. That's, that's the equivalent of, uh, that's probably the most famous Canadian movie. That sentence. Wow. He admitted it.

Yes. They're like in Canada, they give it all the awards that year. The screen awards all go to that actor Wolver actor, Wolverine. Hugh Jackman? No, Wolverine. Dave, what's going on with you, man? Oh, boy, guys. I haven't recorded in a few weeks.

I spent one of those weeks in southern Ontario. Where? Ragweed, capital of Canada. I went to Ragweed Con. Ragweed Con. Oh, my God. I'd love to go, but I can't. So much pollen.

I spent three days in Toronto. My hometown. Just visiting. Where were you staying in Toronto? Near City Hall. Okay, cool. On Queen Street West. Love that place.

And then City Hall. Yeah, it's great. Love City Hall. Oh man, the bylaws. Have you been to the merch table at City Hall? You can get one of those sashes that says Mayor for in May.

And then yeah, saw a few friends. When's the last time you were in Toronto? Maybe a year ago. Do you like TO? Yeah. I'm never there long enough for the weather to be unbearable. The humidity is unbearable there. Yeah.

Obviously, winter is obviously horrible too. Yeah. The window I was there was like, apparently, it had just been unbearable right before I got there. And then it was unbearable right after I left. Right. So, I was really in it. I can testify to both of those. Yeah.

Oh, you were in Toronto recently too, right? Yeah. Was it un, right? Yeah. Was it unbearable? Yeah. It's too hot there. But then there were like six days when it was kind of okay. Yeah. When I was there.

It dipped, but then people pretend that that's what gets me the most about extreme heat is people who are like, I like it. I'm like, ugh. Especially humidity. Yeah. Humidity, I don't are like, I like it. No. I'm like, ugh. Especially humidity. Yeah. Humidity, I don't understand how anyone can like it. No. Like Los Angeles is dry heat. It's like, there's no humidity.

It's like, feels like 28 or 90, whatever. It's going to feel that way. Yeah. But humidity is absolutely. And it's just, yeah, when it won't, when you can't even get cool at night. There's no respice. Yeah. At night, there's no, it's like, what?

Yeah. It's relentless. Yeah, yeah. It is relentless. But night, there's no, it's like, what? Yeah. It's relentless. Yeah, yeah, it is relentless. But you were there for a wedding. I was there for a wedding. So we spent a few days in Toronto. Wait, wait, wait. You were at a wedding, you had to wear a suit and everything?

It was during the time when it wasn't humid. Humid. Humid. But like, yeah, I brought the light, like I have a, like a linen sport coat I brought. Right. Nice. And it was all right. And so, yeah, rented a Dodge Journey, drove up with the family.

What's that? Is that like a four by, four by five? It's like a SUV, maybe a small SUV. I don't know. I've never, I'm not a big SUV guy. Like most of our listeners are. Yeah, yeah. Dave, it's a crossover.

Like most of our listeners are. Yeah, yeah. Dave, it's a crossover. And the wedding was in Owen Sound or right outside Owen Sound. Wow. We got an Airbnb in Owen Sound, which is on Georgian Bay. Must have been beautiful. Yeah. Oh, it was great.

Outdoor wedding? Yeah. In this big farm field. The sun was pretty hot that day. And then at one point, everyone was sitting waiting for the wedding to start. And there was just one cloud in the sky. And it went in front of the sun. And everyone just cheered.

Oh, my gosh. There's no way that cloud knew it was for him. Yeah, yeah. I have to go to a wedding in July. And all I can think about is how hot it's going to be. Yeah. I have to wear a suit. Where is it in Ontario?

In Toronto, yeah. It's going to be like in Muskoka or something like that. Do like Dave, get a linen. Can I borrow your suit? Sure, get a seersucker. There were three seersucker suits there. Really? Yeah.

Say that three times fast. Three seersucker suits. That's once. Yeah. And it was, yeah, a past guest of the show, Dan Werb, was getting married to his now wife, Miranda. And it was a real young, beautiful, sexy crowd. Oh, yeah. Wow.

Oh, yeah. Maybe I can meet women at a wedding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a whole movie about it. I'd rather read the book. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a whole movie about it. I'd rather read the book. Yeah, the movie is Wolverine's origin. Is that how he got? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He's like, this is a cool wedding. Punched in the face. And then he cuts the cake with his claws. Remember that scene? Anyways. Wow. And we drove up. It's compared to here where there's mountains and stuff and like roads curve.

It was one long straight drive. Yeah. Like we could have napped. That's what I find about Toronto as well is it's just flat. So you can cruise around double time. It's very un-scenic when you, not scenic at all, when you get out of the city, you're like, man, this is a lot of nothing. Ontario is so, to drive through Ontario, I've had friends do it, that it takes like two days.

Yeah. And is it all just kind of like? Nothing. So you would say that people from Ontario make fun of Saskatchewan a whole lot for how flat and boring it is. I've never been to Saskatchewan, so I have no point of reference, but I can imagine how flat it is. Yeah, it's crazy flat.

But it's not unpleasant. No. Not like so flat that it's not It's not unpleasant No Not like so flat That it blows your mind Or anything Like it's just flat Normal flat Yeah

You know I don't know why people Gang up on it so much I don't know why either And yeah So we stayed at Stayed at this Airbnb Which was a nice house

In Owen Sound And Must have been cheap Must have been nothing For an Airbnb. Because Airbnbs in Vancouver, I was looking and I was like, wow, this is like $200 a day. Yeah. It's crazy.

It was like $125 a day. For a whole house? Yeah. Oh, that's great. That's amazing. And it, although we had to like, it wasn't baby proof. So we had to like half the rooms, we had to just close the door. Yeah.

And take, you know, yo, you have a nice vase displayed on the bottom shelf of this bookshelf so it up it goes hey right and uh i i realized that i'm really a city mouse uh sure because the first day i couldn't i woke up in the morning and the the i thought i heard the beep beep of like when a smoke detector is dying. Oh yeah. It gives off a couple of beeps every minute and I was looking for it and then it stopped and I couldn't find it and it was a bird.

Oh my God. Someone turn that bird off. That is very. Maybe that is their smoke detector. Yeah. Maybe it's like a canary in a coal mine. It's a living. Wow.

Yeah. So like you were, is Owen sound like it's out in the country or is it a town? It's a town on the water. Yeah. On the other side of Ontario. Yeah. Oh, it's like Huron, Georgian Bay. Okay.

So it's, it's not far from Toronto. It was a two and a half hour drive. And. Was the house old and like historic? No, it was, it was, I guess it was like a sixties house, fifties or sixties. Right. That had like a redone kitchen.

That was pretty nice. My buddy, my buddy owns, his family owns a Airbnb in Jackson's Point, Ontario. And it's, it's like this old, like really old home that was owned by this really rich guy. And it's haunted. Oh, yeah. And here's what happened. Is that part of the Airbnb listing?

It's haunted. So we'll see in the morning. He closes the door. I just did that. It's haunted um so we'll see in the morning it closes the door i just did that it's haunted oh blood on my hands um but this is true so my friend and i went to uh we were roommates and we went to go to his airbnb to pick up some furniture and he was telling me stories how it's haunted i go really he's like and showed me, they have still pictures of the guy who used to own the house. He was this rich guy. He used to own a big, a bunch of companies.

It's like, it's historical. So they just kept all the photos up. So there, there were some guys who were working on the house, like just setting up cable or wifi, whatever. And they were like, Hey, the ghost is like, what's the password? Did you change the password? It's supposed to be boo. Eight O's.

But the workers talked to my buddy's parents and said, hey, who's that guy that's watching us work? Who's that guy? And he was, and what do you mean? And they walked by the hallway and he's like, that guy.

And he was wearing, he's just watching them work. He said they saw him walk by the doorway, peeked in, was like, hmm, and then walked by again. So even in the afterlife? When they said that guy, he was still there? No, on the photos on the wall. Oh. Because they kept all the historic photos.

And they were like, that guy was the guy who was watching it. And because he had a big mustache and stuff like that. And he's like really old. And like just jacking off to his work. And I'm like, yeah, no, no, no, no. You do it there. Yeah. But even in the afterlife, he was like still a boss guy.

Like just checking in like, well, okay. You guys will do it all right. Well, maybe like, you know, they think of it. Still micromanaging in the afterlife. So, so, again, this is true. I, he told me that, and he showed me this brick wall that was down the staircase, next staircase, and there was a few bricks missing. And he goes, my friend says, look in, look inside. No, don't!

And I go, and I go, I go, what's in there? He says, just look inside. Don't do it! And there's this crawl space with this brick wall. And I go, and I go, I go, what's in there? Is it just look inside? Don't do it. And there's this crawl space with this brick wall. And I look inside and beyond the wall is just thousands. Like I'm telling the hundreds, sorry, hundreds of just old liquor bottles. How weird. And I go, why?

Like some of them are like hundreds of years old. And I go, no, a hundred, like a hundred years old. And I go, why is that? He are like hundreds of years old. And I go, not hundreds, like a hundred years old. And I go, why is that? Because he was an alcoholic, drank himself to death. He would drink them like a bottle of barai or whiskey and hide it from his wife and throw it back there. No way my wife will know I just drank a bottle of whiskey. Yeah. I mean, she smelled my breath and I do attack her.

But the bottle is a true sign. She's real into recycling and she would know. So if you look at it, I was like, dude, there's like some really old bottles in there that are probably someone would like, you can sell. Yeah. People would like buy them. Like an 80 year old bottle of like, you know, Canadian whiskey or something. Anyways.

So we went down the stairs. We had a toolbox. Couple of Canadian pickers over here. Yeah. I had a toolbox, uh, to like dismantle something like a, like a drill. So I put it down, dude, I'm not kidding. I put it down.

Me and my friend were looking around. He was by my side the whole time. I put it down behind me. We walked towards some stuff looking for this table. We found it. I go, where's the drill? The ghost is drilling you.

Ghost is like, you mind if I borrow this? And I go, I go, I don't know. He was by my side the whole time. And my friend's like, I have no idea. Like what? My friend went up the stairs. He's a bathroom. He goes, here it is.

It was at the top of the stairs. What? I do that kind of stuff all the time. And I don't blame him. He was by my side the whole time. That's, I think you were getting pranked. I do a lot of stuff all the time and i don't blame my side the whole time that's but i think you're getting pranked i do a lot of like ghost prank where did i leave my keys oh they're over here ghost i blame the ghost the uh uh one thing about all like we drove through a couple of small towns through there

like i forget all their names now. Meaford. Sure. And the Gimme Gimmes. And they all seem to have, and I think Nelson, BC has this policy of like no chain stores on the main drag. Right. Really? Ropes only.

It's all mom and pop stuff. Mom and pop stuff and stuff that's been there for 50 years. They've got a, you know, every city has a giant highway outside that has like all of your Canadian chains, your Harvey's, your Swiss Chalet, Montana's, Kelsey's. My buddy who's in town had A&W for the first time in 20 years, 15 years, because they had in the States a lot. And it's like, they're everywhere here. My buddy Kirk Smith, who was in town had A&W for the first time in 20 years. Oh. 15 years, because they had in the States a lot, and it was like, they're everywhere here. Yeah. My buddy Kirk Smith, who was in town. They are everywhere. And they're like, I was like, yeah, they're everywhere here.

I didn't know they were so prominent in the States, and now they're. They're a separate company, the Canadian one and the American one. Oh. Which is weird. And can I tell you, so, but in the small town of Oakville, was that where I was? Owen Sound. Owen Sound, yeah. Sorry.

Here are some of the names of the stores that weren't big chains. Okay. There was Bike Face Cycling. Wait, wait, wait. Bike Face. Oh, that was one of Stan Lee's characters that didn't work out. Yeah, Bike Face. Yeah, Bike Face.

He's got a face like a bike. He's got gears for us. Grease up my head. Let's go. There was fromage music, which is some kind of cheese music. Sure, cheese music. Yeah, yeah. There was Dr. Cobble's shoes and swirls.

Swirls? Swirls? So it is shoes and ice cream? Didn't look in. I don't know. Does he serve the ice cream in the shoe? It's Canada's only Soft serve

Shoe store And there was An all female Like basically Curves You know Workout place For women only

With like the glass You can't see in From the outside It's all private For women Called A woman's journey Wow

Wow Next to the The The Cobble swirl guy There was I was Some Small town Oh, wow. Wow. Wow. Next to the Cobbleswirl guy? Mm-hmm. There was some small town where the Curves was obviously a renovated, I believe it was a renovated Pizza Hut because it had that roof.

Yeah. But it might not have been Pizza Hut. It might have been a Taco Bell, but it was like something where you looked at and you're like, that's not a place to go lose weight. It's a place to go gain weight we got the same clients a lot of people showed up oh uh all right well i'm gonna get a taco but i should probably do this instead you guys still do the pizza buffet get in here you stuff crust a woman's journey there was also a lot of uh in these small towns a lot of like 70s style maybe 80s style chinese restaurants that

had like a pagoda roof oh yeah and uh but no asian people for miles no yeah it'd be like you go in it's two polish guys that run the chinese uh did the asian polish chinese fusion yeah did the asians have sausage i didn't know there was chinese sausage Yeah, you dip it in milk, it's great It's authentic Chinese Molto bene Well, I guess he gave us chopsticks So it must be authentic He gave us a chopstick

Just poke it, you're food This is a pogo stick I've noticed from doing stand-up in small towns Is because I don't I don't really know how our immigration policy works but i think you are sent to when you come into canada you don't get to choose where you land necessarily no oh maybe refugees maybe maybe yeah so like i think you if you are of means you can go wherever yeah you yeah yes uh so so i'll go to a small town and it'll be

a and w and i didn't like the way i said refugees there's real sound real snooty refugees maybe but they'll have all the kind of like uh chain stores and then there will be something like it'll be like a sudanese restaurant oh yeah and there will just be one of those i think it's because someone from sudan was probably like i want to start a business but it might be too expensive it's just go to owens allen it's probably super cheap i can get a house really cheap maybe that's what maybe that's what it is but i've noticed in a lot of small towns there will be just like the the most ordinary north american cuisine and then one restaurant that's so authentic it's ridiculous yeah that you're so authentic. It's ridiculous. Yeah. That you're like, well, I've never, I've never had easy open food.

Why not here in Northern Alberta? Sure. I, yeah, the first day we got there, I was like, Oh man, you know what? The, I, you see ads for like houses for sale for a hundred thousand dollars. And you're like, I could move here. Yeah. It's nice. Yeah.

And then after, you know, three days, like there's only three restaurants. They're all chains. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. You're like, well, I've had everything on the menu at least three restaurants. Boy, I don't think it's going to work out. I think it's, you know, you have to, you have to like staring off into the middle distance, you know, and drinking lemonade. I think that's something you want to do in a small town.

Like a retire. Yeah, or like fishing. Like, I think people can spend a whole week just, like, trying to catch a fish, and they find that relaxing and fun, you know? People watch fishing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I feel like if that's your speed, then a small town could really do a lot for you because, you know, you, like, wake up and you're like,

am I going to go spend nine hours just like standing around fishing before. Me neither. And I don't ever plan to. Me neither. Well, no, I did it once in high school because it was part of a, like in the outdoor adventures class,

which is the best. And yeah, they tried to teach us how to fish. It was very bad at it. Yeah. I've gone three or four times, but you know, on a boat and like, I'm not a boat. I'm not boat it. Yeah. I've gone three or four times, but you know, on a boat and like,

I'm not a boat. I'm not boat people. Yeah. And also it's kind of. I can't swim. You can't swim? Eddie. Never learned?

Never learned. Come, we'll give you lessons. Yeah, we'll go to, we'll all go to Owen Sound together. Yeah. Yeah, we'll hop in the lake. I'll learn to fish. $800 return flight.

Dave will learn to, to be more at home in a small town. Yeah, I'll learn to slow down. Yeah. And you'll learn to be more at home in a small town. Yeah, I'll learn to slow down. Yeah, and you'll learn to swim. And then we'll all

go get Sudanese. Yeah, we'll all go have, yeah, whatever it is, the delicacy of Sudan. So, Graham, what's going on with you?

Well, I, yeah, I was in your hometown, Toronto. I went and visited the shrine, the Eddie Del Aceve shrine. His hair. Would you like to spit aille shrine his hair would you like a bag yeah would you like a bag of his hair uh i declined i was like i'm gonna meet him in person

uh and it was it was so hot like and and like i say the thing that bothers me the most is are other people that don't think it's so hot i love it yeah oh this is it could be hotter oh and i'm like i bring i bring pants in a bag to switch because it's so hot i love it i won't be having to like these starving polar bears wandering down the streets looking for food i stayed in an airbnb in uh in chinatown you stay in one place the whole time the one place the whole time? The one place the whole time. Just because it's so much easier. Chinatown was busy, huh? Chinatown in the summer is bananas.

It is so packed. So packed. And Toronto has this weird thing where there are these streets that kind of, they're basically alleys. But then there's houses in them yes and uh and like really good ones too yeah like super nice houses but it's not like the taxi driver's like i can't drop you off at the my car can't get yeah yeah you have to walk down this alley and i was like and there's a ghost yeah i was like well this doesn't sound i think i've made a huge mistake airbnb wise if i have to walk down a scary alley.

The place was fine, but there's like a whole block, but you can only access it through this disgusting alley. It was very gross. And, but, so I had to walk through kind of the length of Chinatown every day. And I tried a bunch of stuff that I've never had before. Like there was a guy with this machine that he put like a sugar cane in. And then it like was fresh sugar cane juice. Oh, yeah. Oh, this would have been hell for you.

You're off sugar. I know. But do you know what I'm talking about? So he's just got this pot full of giant sugar cane, and he runs. Part of the thing is watching him make the thing. Is this an ethnic food? I have no idea.

It was delicious. Is it from Jamaica? No, it was a Chinese guy doing it. So maybe, I don't know. It was in Chinatown. It's a Chinese thing. Because, yeah, when I told other people about it from Toronto, they looked at me like I was insane. But they were like, what?

They make it on the street? And I'm like, yeah, it's like a cart. Yeah. And he puts it in one part and they're like. They have all these like authentic like desserts there were like or like like the coconut with like. Oh, yeah. People are walking around with just like a coconut. Yeah.

With a straw. Who are you with a sandals? I was at a sandals. But it was a weird one that you had to enter through a gross alley. Right. And then on the other side, you're like, this is quite nice. But then. A lot of bubble tea there, too.

Yeah. Do you like bubble tea? I had bubble tea. I had that cane juice every other day. Every other day? Yeah, I loved it. I've never had bubble tea. But that's like a natural sugar. Every other day? Yeah, I loved it. I've never had bubble tea.

But that's like a natural sugar. That's okay. Refined sugar is like. Oh, here it comes, Eddie. Come. Yeah. Come. Make an excuse. Here we are.

There we go. I could make an exception for that. And then, because I was doing the show Ring-a-Ding-Dong Dandy, and at the beginning of every show, I rip off a t-shirt. Uh-huh. So I was like, in Chinatown, they've got, you know,

10 t-shirts for $7 or whatever. Yeah, yeah. So I bought, I bought a bunch of t-shirts and- You cut them up. Yeah, cut them up.

You've learned your lesson. Oh, absolutely, I have. And you gotta pre, you gotta pre-tear a little. I know. You gotta be up there for a note. What's the word?

The Hulk Hogan nose. Everybody knows. There was one time when me and Hari Kondabolu had to pull a shirt off of you. Yeah, it's because- Was that the worst it ever was? Yeah, that's the worst it ever was. I had all these kind of like rope burns all over me. Oh my God.

And then, so then I was staying in this Airbnb in the basement, but they didn't have a laundry machine. They didn't have laundry. So you just bought a new shirt every day. That is exactly what I did. Oh, really? Yeah, because one day I was like, oh, I'll just go walk around the neighborhood. I'll find out where the laundromat is. Never could find a laundromat.

No, there's no laundromats around there. And so then I just went into a store. Look at this guy with his laundromat is. Never could find a laundromat. No, there's no laundromats around there. And so then I just went into a store. Look at this guy with his laundromat. He's like human Yelp. Yeah, but there's, I assume just because there's lots of people living there. What was the intersection? Shut up. I know there's a laundromat around.

Okay, it was at Spadina and Dundas. Oh, you could have went to Spadina and Queen, hang a right. There's a laundromat across the street from a Vietnamese restaurant. It's got laundryundas. Oh, you could have went to Spadina and Queen, hang a right. There's a laundromat across the street from a Vietnamese restaurant. It's got laundry darts. Oh. Right in the corner of the TD Bank. Really?

I never saw a laundromat there. On Queen and Spadina. I don't think it's still there. Yes, it is. Sorry, I asked. Are you sure? Yeah. I don't know, man, because I walk down there every day and never saw a laundromat.

There's a laundromat right there. No. We're going to, during the break, we're going to prove Eddie wrong. All right, let's figure it out. So, during the break, we're going to prove Eddie wrong. All right, let's figure it out. So did you, so you bought a new shirt, you bought just a,

what did you do with these shirts after we were done? Or were they, did you wear a shirt through the day and then tear it off at the show

and have a show shirt to wear underneath? No, I, I bought. You sold the shirt back up for the night? I,

no, I bought, I just bought a bunch of black t-shirts and then I wore them in a, in a rotation. Yeah, and then I, no, I bought, I just bought a bunch of black t-shirts and then I wore them in a rotation. Yeah. And then I, uh, I just left them in a bag. Uh.

For the next guy to throw away. Yeah, exactly. Uh, I brought some of them back, but I didn't, I didn't have enough room for all of them. I also bought a hat that had, uh, that had been bedazzled for $5 and I wore that every day. I thought you were going to say a baseball cap with a little fan on it. They probably could have. And then, yeah. Chinatown's

the place to get a thing like that. If you have an idea of a hat, it's already there. One time I was like, I wanted to get one of those bug zappered tennis racket shaped things. Oh, yeah. Where do you get a thing? I'll just go to any store in Chinatown.

Yeah. Yeah. And the thing that I really liked about Chinatown is they're not afraid to haggle. So you go in and everything's negotiable. So I bought this bedazzled hat. $10 it said. I walked in with five, put it on the counter. Oh, you didn't write it down on a piece of paper?

Yeah, I have a number that I'm thinking of. Because that's how it's supposed to be done. Yeah, I understand. I understand there are rituals. Yeah, and then I just bought a bunch of socks, and that's how I lived my life. And at every show, you tear off your socks yeah yeah like your favorite wrestler yeah um uh mankind mr saga um um so how were the shows they were good uh it was it was fun it was a lot of work before we left yeah ryan had been offered like a big advertising thing.

Oh really? Yeah. And then they moved the date till like the fall or something. So he showed up to every show. He was there every time. And it was great. And yeah, we had a lot of fun. And the only downside was one day the power went out on the whole block of the theater, like where my theater was.

And so you just didn't have a show. And that kind of sucks. Cause you know, I got to keep myself in a Chinese shirts and socks. Right. Right. You need that income. Yeah.

But otherwise it was great. It was, I was there. They, they rejigged the time that the festival happened. So I was there during pride, which I don't remember happening in the past. Huh.

And then that was like... Yeah, they changed it around. They changed the dates for it. I thought it was in August. Yeah, those sneaky gays. Yeah. And then that was just like... I didn't go to it because I had two shows that day,

but I remember walking down the street and being like, boy, there's a lot of people just kind of in their underwear walking around and that was Pride Day. And Queen Street West has, they call it Queer Street West. Queer Street West. They make a little sign with rainbows. Yeah, I wonder how the queen

feels about that. I don't think it was named after her. I think it was named after one of her grandparents. Oh yeah. Probably true. Yeah, so it was named after her. I think it was named after one of her grandparents. Oh, yeah. Probably true. Yeah, so it was a fun time to be in Toronto. That was going on, and then some soccer thing is happening, so there would be a whole day where people are driving around honking their horns.

Oh, yeah, yeah. There's some soccer there. Yeah. And I've never been so happy about anything that I've honked a horn in a car. Especially something that went to penalty kicks. It's like, yeah, we were that much better than Croatia. Well, one night we were there, Portugal won. Yeah. Oh my God, you were there for that? Yeah. And I was in, yeah, I was in a cab stuck in

little Portugal. People just run around the streets. Yeah, but they had one at four o'clock in the afternoon. I was in a cab at 9.30 at night and people were still like honk, honk, honk, honk. And I'm like, what's the cutoff, guys? Five hours straight of celebrating. But it makes all other honking moot. It's like, oh, I was actually angry at this other driver,

but he thinks I'm just a happy Portuguese guy. Yeah, so it felt like the whole time I was there, it was like festival, you know? Like every day there was something going on. There's always something going on there. Yeah. There is. Especially when it's not freezing. And then you like turn down some street

and the whole street is blocked off and it's like, this is a taste of the city, but it's only on this one street. Yeah. What a city. Taste it. It's Toronto.

Yeah. Get it in you. Get some city in your mouth. What a city. Taste it. Take a bite. What a stupid city. And yeah, so then I came back here.

Yeah, with some of the shirts that I bought in Chinatown. Nice. A little profit. Yeah. How's the quality of the shirts? They're okay? Here's the weird thing about these shirts is they had a tag, you know, in the neck. And then as soon as I got them home, the tags all fell off.

So I don't know if they were. I don't know. You don't want that. Yeah. I don't want the tag. Yeah. Maybe they should all come like that. But I wonder what the deal was.

Were they? Cause the tag wasn't of like a fancy brand name. It was like Gildan or whatever. Yeah. Whatever the washing, uh, like a directions and name it was like Gildan or whatever whatever the most washing like directions

and stuff like that don't don't put this with your regular clothes it's like putting a paper towel in the sink the sink will just just fall apart

yeah do not wash one wear only don't sweat don't wash don't wear don't wear it's actually made out of cotton candy.

This shirt's only for store mannequins. Yeah. That's why they were so cheap. Oh, these are mannequin shirts. Do we want to move on to overheards? I think we have a bit of business. Oh, okay. But if not, then overheards.

All right. On to overheards or a bit of business? I think we have a bit of business. Oh, okay. But if not, then overheards. All right. Life can be fun. Don't get carried away. You got to do the things you don't want to do to get through the day. You got to shine your shoes. You got to sweep the floor. You got to clean your house. You got to do some more.

Take care of business. We've got a little bit of business. We sum up on the Jumbotron. We got a message from Sonia B to Chris H. And she says, a happy Christmas in July birthday to Chris in Seattle. Chris is a canoe paddler, salmon habitat restorer. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What does that mean?

Well, he's repairing what I am damaging. Habitat for salmanity? I go around, I kick salmon in their big chins. Yeah, they do have big... Oh, they're the Jay Leno fish. I don't know if I'm remembering salmon right. No, I think you're right. They do.

They have like a big weird... Well, he's in Seattle where they just chuck salmon around. Yeah, which is weird because they've got plenty of tossed out and scrambled eggs there. They're going again. He's a cat lover. Yeah. A builder and tinkerer. Kind of.

You know what? Builder's better. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Tinkerer just sort of. Sounds like tinker toys. Yeah, it undermines builder. He's a builder. We'll punch this up for you.

He's a tinkerer. A thinkerer. A stinkerer. A twinkerer. He's an aquarium gardener. Don't know what that means. He gardens an aquarium. Yeah, yeah. know what that means. He gardens an aquarium. Yeah, yeah.

He puts on one of those full diving suits. Or he puts in a plant for his goldfish. There you go. And a loving partner. Aw. He is generous with his time and talents and is present when we spend time together. He doesn't look at his phone all the time. He's present.

Like the last guy I was with. Yeah, that sounds like a very uh like therapist kind of like be present yeah when you spend time together be present oh as a parent i will say that it is like you can be there with your kid it's a real uh it's hard not to look at your phone um i love his funny jokes and when he laughs at mine. I love you, Chris. Aw. Adorbs. Yeah. And now we got an email.

Uh-huh. And apparently there's been some sort of mix-up at MaxFunCentral that has nothing to do with us. Yeah, we never got this original message two years ago. Two years ago. So this is like at the end scene of Back to the Future when the guy shows, or Back to the Future 2, where the guy shows up with the letter for Marty. Oh. That's been in the UPS for however long. I think it was Western Union. Yes, you're right.

Thank you. But, you know, parcel. I was thinking, what's an old thing? Parcels. So two years ago, Anna G bought a Jumbotron. And it was for her brother. For Sam's 34th birthday. And we never got this

information. Since then, he has turned 35 and 36 all in the same year. Gotten married. Graduated physician assistant school and had a kid and has restored many salmon habitats.

Could you congratulate him on one or more of those events? I will congratulate him on turning 35. I will congratulate him on his kid. Okay. Yeah. So, sorry about that, Anna. Yeah, and we're going to figure it out. And we're going to, we'll probably send you one of these Chinatown shirts that I bought.

Free of charge. Don't promise. Do not put it in the wash. Do you want to move on to overheard? I absolutely do. Hi, I'm comedian Emily Heller. And I'm cartoonist Lisa Hanawalt. And we're the hosts of Baby Geniuses.

Do you want to learn weird new facts? Do you like hearing successful creative women talk about their poop? Do you want the scoop on Martha Stewart's pony? If you answered yes to any of these questions, our show is for you. We interview people like Paul F. Tompkins, Kristen Shaw, Michael Che, and more. So check us out on Maximum Fun. And let us mess with your brain. Yes, please. Hey, you work hard, you play harder, you look great, and you smell fantastic. You deserve a vacation where you can kick back, hone your creativity, enjoy incredible comedy performances,

and make some new lifelong friends in a maybe haunted inn in the Poconos Mountains. We've got The Adventure Zone, JJ Go, Joe Firestone's Friends of Single People, plus stand-up from Aparna Nancherla, Phoebe Robinson, Kevin Avery, Joel Kim Booster, and way more. Join us for MaxFunCon East, September 2nd through 4th. There are only 10 rooms left,

so head to MaxFunCon.com and nail down your tickets today. Like now. Do it. Overheard. Overheards. But before we get to Overheard Overheard But before we get to Overheard We've got a little bit of mail Mail call

Play the mail theme Hey That's what I have so far It's a work of progress This is from Ben M In Brooklyn, New York. Ah.

And I like this is a letter, and the stamps are very cool. It's Batman, Harvey Milk, and Batman again. Oh, cool. Three gay icons. Yeah. Oh. And what these are, it says, Hi, guys.

Here are some stickers I made to put on things that are gross. Thought you might find a use for some. Thanks for all you do. Love the show. Ben in Brooklyn. So, yeah, they're just stickers that say gross. You want some, Eddie? Of course.

How many are there? There's a whole stack. Yeah, a stack. That's not an amount. One, two, three, four. Oh, probably. I need some words for my shows. Sure, just write a bit about it. Hey, I also three, four. Oh, probably. I need some merch for my shows. Sure, just write a bit about it.

Hey, I also got gross stickers. This guy's gross, huh? He needs a sticker on his head. See me after the show. They're $40 each. There you go. There's three. Find three gross things.

To get you started. Yeah. Maybe I should get ones that say Paul. I'm going to get Paul Gross stickers. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's fun. From Due South. There you go.

There's a collection of Gross stickers for you. And thank you very much, Ben. Thanks, Ben. Thanks, Ben. In Brooklyn. And now, time for Overheard. Now, this is a segment in which we hear things out in the world, report them back here on the podcast.

We like to start with the guests. This happened in Los Angeles, where I live, by a movie theater, which is not that far from my place. I went to go watch a movie with my friend, and this woman in front of me was buying tickets for this one movie. And there's a movie with Colin Farrell called The Lobster. Oh, yes. And the woman in front of me said, I'll take three tickets for The Red Lobster. Oh, boy.

Red Lobster, the movie. Which I thought was pretty funny. And I thought it was funny that the guy didn't correct her. So that woman went in there thinking, the Red Lobster was really good. The ups and downs. i just laughed out loud oh i laughed i laughed i saw colin farrell the red lobster oh the red lobster that's how it was made huh no like i was just i'm just running through it in my head why don't fast food chains make movies mcdonald's try to make one no in the 80s called mac and me

that was about an alien. And there's a huge scene that takes place. A huge dance scene where the alien hypnotizes everybody and they all dance in a McDonald's. And every time Paul Rudd is on Conan, whenever he says he has a clip, he throws to a clip from Mac and Me. Really? Yeah. This crazy clip of a kid going down a hill in a wheelchair. really yeah this crazy clip of a kid going down a wheelchair and uh

but so that's one that they actually did make and starbucks tried to didn't didn't they yeah they were the primary behind they made like akila and the b akila and the b but that wasn't that wasn't about starbucks but it was like how come these giant companies don't just make a movie not necessarily about red lobster but red lobster presents you know like a red lobster fill a red lobster joint yeah yeah i never i've never been to a red lobster i love lobster i love most non-fish seafood are you allergic to seafood i am wow you are allergic to everything yeah yeah yeah i saw i saw a red lobster in toronto and i was tempted but there was just it was just they don't have them here no no we don't i think there's one in calgary. I remember that. I have a friend. I love Red Lobster.

Who I used to work with, and she moved to Maine for a year. And I was like, oh, when you're in Maine, go to Red Lobster. And then when she came back a year later, she was like, I asked around. They don't have a Red Lobster. I was like, I was joking. They've got a lot of other lobsters. Some man just guided me to the sea. They're all there. You look like Colin Farrell

Dave do you have another one? I also like on Conan when John Tesh is on And they throw to a clip It's always like an old Frankenstein movie That was pretty great Which why would John Tesh need to throw to a clip But John Tesh He wrote the NBA theme for NBC.

Really? I feel like everything he's written is like the fun, fast part. And he wrote something else that was really big too. You're like a theme. He did entertainment tonight. Entertainment tonight. The NBA theme. And this might be one more but i know but he what i love about john

tash is that he gets he's in on the how funny it is to be john tash do you know what i mean like he's a guy he's like good at what he does people like him because they like him but then he doesn't think that it's weird do you know what i mean he doesn't think that it's weird that people think that it's funny yeah well i yeah. Well, I like that. Because Michael Bolton had like a beef with Conan O'Brien. Oh, really? He gave an interview once and he said, if I ever see Conan O'Brien, I'll punch him in the face. And Conan O'Brien was like, we've maybe made two jokes about him ever.

Just takes himself too seriously. But then he was in that whatever, Lonely Island thing. Yeah. And it's like Michael Bolton now knows that he's Michael Bolton. Yeah, that's true. Come to peace with it. So I've got a lot of overhears to choose from. And you know what?

I'll parse them out. Sure. Through the next few weeks, turn, turn, turn. A time for overheards. This was one that uh uh there was like a an 11 year old girl and her glum 15 year old brother just like this shitty depressed teen yeah shitty teen um and she was this little 11-old girl was super excited. Yeah. Had this like rolling luggage with like.

Frozen. Frozen on it. Yeah. And she, they couldn't have been more opposite. And they just got off the flight. It's like five-hour flight from Toronto to Vancouver. And she says, Julian, Julian, Julian, Julian, running through the airport. And he goes, what?

She says, what's your favorite airport? And he goes, Denver. Yeah, it's a hub. It's a nice airport. Is it? Yeah. I've never been. Never been to Denver.

So many laundromats there. Yeah. Anything? Yeah. I looked it up It's not there anymore Damn it Oh you were wrong

That's wrong yeah It's now a gourmet hot dog restaurant Oh I went there Yeah Ironically Made your shirt dirty Don't worry I've got 80 more

I just ripped this one off There's another one underneath In many ways A gourmet hot dog place Is the opposite of a laundromat. Yeah, and it,

do you know what? The thing with a gourmet hot dog place is like, it's all the toppings or whatever, but it just tastes like,

it tastes like, there's no difference between that and something you get on the street. Yeah, that's true. Yeah,

like there's no, there's no next level, I don't think. Yeah, there's like the very little wiggle room for like oh this is amazing this is yeah you're always like this just like the street meat like the street hot dogs in toronto are good i like them yeah yeah and it's not that different from that i'm hearing you i'm feeling it um uh you have overheard i do. I'm trying to think of what my favorite airport is. Oh. Eh.

Hmm. What do I like? I don't like Heathrow. No, I don't like Heathrow either. I don't think I like, I don't like JFK. I don't like LAX. Oof. Scary airport.

Yeah. Scary. You know what I like? I like the one in Vegas. The Vegas. My favorite airport. McCarran? Yeah.

Is the Toronto Island one. The Porter one. Oh, yeah. They give Porter one. Oh, yeah. They give out snacks. Oh, really? Free coffee, free snacks, free like a bottle of water. Ooh. Like a lounge.

It's a cool lounge. You're like, what the? Yeah, I like that. Yeah. This, mine is also from an airplane. Uh-huh. This was at the very beginning of the flight. Uh-huh.

Uh, this was at the very beginning of the flight. Uh, the person on the, uh, intercom said, uh, we would be happy to help you in French, English, Cantonese, or Greek. And the woman next to me goes, Greek. Wow. Help me in Greek. Get over here and help me in Greek. I don't speak it, but I love to be helped in Greek. Um, yeah, I don't, I, but I love to be helped in Greek. Yeah, I don't...

I didn't know that it would be... What was the airline? Air Canada? There was just maybe one flight attendant who spoke Greek. Yeah, and so they're like... Oh, and they had that as an option. Yeah. And then somebody broke a plate in the back. Yeah.

Opa! They said opa, and then somebody came on. And then they were like, oh, we got to land, emergency landing, this is a terrorist attack. So yeah, had that person smuggle a plane on board. You could use the shards. Yeah. Let's roll. And now we also have overheard sent in from people around the world.

If you want to send one into us, you can send it into spy at maximum fun.org. Also on our flight, I've never bought a sandwich on the plane because usually I'm more prepared but I was really hungry and I bought a sandwich and why don't they even on like long flights where you get a free meal why don't they just have sandwiches

like instead of some weird reheated pasta or oh yeah like sandwiches are fine yeah I've never understood that thing bread's fine Like instead of some weird reheated pasta or. Oh yeah. Like sandwiches are fine. Yeah. I've never understood that thing. Bread's fine. It was a wrap.

Give me a wrap. Yeah. Like it would be easy enough now to provide a gluten-free version or whatever. Like if you requested a sandwich that was gluten-free. It's just that airline food and I've never, like I always eat it. Yeah. It just stinks. It'll never-free. It's just that airline food, and I've never, like I always eat it. Yeah. It just stinks. It'll never get good.

Unless it's a really high-end airline, like Emirates or something. Oh, sure, yeah. Or like if you're ever flown business class, you do get a little, something a little fancy. Oh, all right. This first one comes from Jeremy F. At work, crowd of people coming in apparently from a late lunch, missed most of what they said, but as they passed by, I heard one woman say, I need a butter nap.

So is that because you had too much butter? Or you're going to put butter on your face and go to sleep? Or everything about her is hot, butter nap. She's a butter nap. She's a real butter nap. She sleeps so ugly, yeah. M yeah mouth wide open arm over that lady last sex was great but uh she's a butter nap a bit of a butter nap uh um yeah so i don't know what that is like a wet nap but it's covered it's soaked in butter i think she probably meant a wet nap to get the butter off her fingers from her time at Red Lobster.

I went through the grocery store yesterday, and there's this lady who's there sometimes, the checkout lady. And she always tries to guess what you're going to do with the things that you're buying. And I'm like, that's not. What? I do not think that's a fun game. Because I'm buying a pack of condoms and a kilo of cocaine. I'm going to mule this. Yeah.

I'm going to keister this for my time in a prison. Yeah. I don't like that. Like, because sometimes I'll be buying stuff for a meal and then just like a gallon of milk for later. Yeah. So this. It's not all going into one thing. This woman was quizzing the lady in front of me about why she was buying whipping cream. And she guessed it right.

She was like, are you going to make butter chicken? Which I guess is what you use. I don't know. And then the lady said, yeah, what else would I make? And then the lady's like, well, whipped cream. What it's for one time i uh made a like a a grocery list abby and i have an app where we share grocery lists and so whoever happens to be at the grocery store can just buy whatever and i was making fettuccine alfredo and it has whipped cream in it yeah and she didn't realize that's what i

needed it for and she bought like a can of shake-up whipped cream. Yeah, so you just had noodles with that on top. Yeah. It's a noodle sundae. That's the sound of gourmet when that sound. Yeah. The fettuccine's ready. Oh, it is so good, though.

That cane whipping cream, it's maybe the perfect food. so good though that that cane whipping cream it's the maybe the perfect food uh uh this next one comes from zach from birmingham alabama is he still a lego maniac i remember that ad i work nights at a large hospital i was on my way to the restroom last night and had to go uh uh on the first floor and when i stepped off the elevator there was a large family sitting in one of the waiting areas. They were all very quiet when I walked past. Right before I entered the restroom, I hear in a very southern gentleman voice. And that's how my daddy won best dill pickle at the 56th state thing. Pretty great.

Pretty great. That can't be the way. that i mean i want to hear the whole story i want to be the judge of the dill pickles at the state fair i want to go and try all the dill pickles but like the family must have heard that story a thousand times at this point yes we know he He drugged the judges. And this last one comes from James M. in London. James McAvoy, the last king of Scotland. Is he the guy in also the X-Men? He's in one of those newfangled flashback X-Men, I think. Is he James McAvoy? It's James McAvoy plays the the good guy xavier i think okay it's a weird thing because

i went saw uh the most recent uh captain america in the theater they have an ad for the new x-men and the big like up to this point xavier's had hair right and the big stinger the big end of the ad in the trailer is you see him and he's bald. And that's supposed to be like, this is the one where he's bald. Finally. What's his baldness origin story? Anyway. You were just calling him Xavier.

I think they really want you to emphasize the X in that. Xavier. X Xavier. Oh, X Xavier. Yeah, you're right. Oh, yeah. Now it makes sense. Now that I hear it.

I happened to be downtown next to a movie theater at like 11 in the morning, and I had just done my work for the day. And I was like, oh, maybe I'll check out the movies, and I opened up my movie listing app,

and there was literally nothing I wanted to see. Oh, really? The Red Lobster? The Red red lobster wasn't there red lobster presents and i don't think that's ever happened there's one there's one movie out right now that i would consider seeing but uh oh there's two out right now that i want to see what uh the nice guys uh that i don't think that's still out it's still playing at the 5th Avenue Where you can have a nice cocktail And then there's one called Swiss Army Man

That looks really crazy Right, with Daniel Radcliffe That one looks pretty insane We're recording this before Ghostbusters comes out Oh yeah, I'll probably go see But we The only one I would consider seeing Is Mike and Kevin need wedding plans.

Oh yeah. Yeah. That looks kind of fun. Yeah. I like fun people. Um, this last one. I'm a real Efron head from way back. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. You've always been a completist. Uh, this morning I was on the bus heading to work. I love this. I love everything about this. At the traffic lights a black porsche pulled up the driver was a large gentleman eating a mcdonald's breakfast sandwich he took a big bite

and most of the egg part of the mcmuffin slid right out and onto his shirt he looked furious as the car pulled away i saw that the license plate read mensa with a five where the S should be. Oh my God. Bloop. There, there is nothing quite as funny as somebody biting into a sandwich and the bulk of the sandwich sliding out the end. And someone in like a hundred thousand dollar car. Oh yeah.

Oh, he's just like us. Yeah. It's those big, stupid idiots just like us. Um, yeah. So that's, uh, that's overheards. Yeah, those big stupid idiots just like us. Yeah, so that's overheards. Oh man, you know what I would really like?

A really nice car. I don't know that I would want a car that you know, when it drives by, people look at it, like they stare at it. I don't care if it's a nice car,

but I want a car that's, like, crazy. Like an art car. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want something insane. Whoa, like, you see a car that's got all the little figurines on it, the whole thing. Something like that, or something where it's, like, a car that looks like it's a movie prop.

You know what I mean? Like, just something that people see in there yeah it's from a museum yeah what does the inside of a car look like you live in los angeles people aren't really like status conscious about cars there no no it's basically yeah it's all corolla yeah just drive what you drive it's actually full pod to have a good car what do you have have? What kind of car do you have? I have a 2014 Honda Civic. Ooh! I'm not a big car guy.

Never was. I'm just like... Like you're not a big car guy? No, come on. Oh, come on. Shut up. I drove my dad's Ford Focus wagon for years. I didn't care. Yeah. Yeah, I think... I'm point A to point B kind of thing. Yeah, but I liked point A to point B.

And during that time, I want people to be like, what a weird car. I would really like such a weird, such a weird car. I would like my current car, the Subaru Impreza. Yeah.

2006. Just with like leather seats, just like a comfier ride. I will say this though. Uh, the one car I do would love to get is a Tesla for sure. If I had the money,

the idea of that is completely electric. It's not even a question of having the money. You also need to have a garage with a charging station. Right, right, right. Yeah. I can't get a Tesla if I have a roommate and an apartment.

Yeah. Yeah, that's my landlord. If I can plug in my Tesla. That doesn't sound right You just have like Wires coming out of your window Bro did you take out the AC? I gotta charge my Tesla

Yeah my Tesla needs charging For the next Well 26 hours We're not using the proper Charging station I think there's some Teslas That can drive themselves right?

Yeah They only sometimes crash There's some Teslas that can drive themselves, right? Yeah. Yeah. And they only sometimes crash. There's some guy who recently died from it. That's going to be a crazy time when half of the cars on the road are self-driving and the other half are just people still driving. Uber has invested billions of dollars in technology for the self-driving car. Yeah, of course.

That's their whole plan. The whole plan is to have no more drivers. Yeah. But there's going to be a time when there's going to be people who can't afford a self-driving car, and there's going to be people who can, and they're going to both be on the road at the same time. Of course. And it's going to be insane. It's going to be insane. Because I have owned my car for 10 years.

I plan to drive it into the ground. Literally. Well, I mean, there's no reason to get a new car. If you upgrade to a Tesla or even a Prius, you're doing more damage to the environment by throwing out a perfectly

good car. Exactly. That waste has to go somewhere. Yeah. China. It's going to go into the ground. It's going to go into making shirts for Graham. Yeah, absolutely. Most of those shirts were recycled car. This is my, I'm a real eco-terrorist. In addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls. If you would like to call us, our phone number is 1-844-SPY-POD1.

That is 1-UGH-SPYPOD1. That is one. Ugh. SpyPod1. I crossed my eyes during the ugh. Like these people have. You can tell. Dave, shut up. This is Mitch C. from San Antonio, Texas, calling in with an overheard.

I was outside of a Baskin-Robbins. Two women approached the building, and one said to the other, now hiring scoopers, dude, that's all me. That's all me or all meat? All me. Yeah, yeah.

Basket rock. What would that mean? Like a ground beef scoop. Oh, sure. Yeah. A burger cone. Yeah. You would have to cook the...

Yeah, it would all be cooked and then you just get a... Like, because remember on Roseanne, they had the loose meat sandwiches? Of course. And they scooped it with, like, an ice cream scoop? I don't remember that. You don't? There was, like, a couple seasons where she had a...

I mean, I don't remember the scoop specifically. That, I remember just sitting there. It's one of those things where there's, like, a food in a movie or a TV show, and that's all you can focus on. Give me ten more examples. That sandwich in Spanglish. Never saw it. The rib joint in House of Cards.

Sure. Oh, yeah. The sandwiches in the Cosby Show. Yeah, when they would talk. Absolutely. When they would talk about the meat on a stick in Something About Mary. And eating a cone.

You're at four, maybe? No, I think I'm at five, at least. Well, only if you count my Cosby show. Yeah, I do. There's in The Crow, the cop buys the kid a hot dog. And I remember thinking that hot dog looks so delicious. I got a hot dog. And I wish that a cop would buy me a hot dog at some point in my life.

I wish that a cop would buy me a hot dog at some point in my life. There's what she's having when Harry met Sally. Yep. Then I feel like, isn't there some sort of, oh, in Stand By Me, the pie that the guy eats before he vomits on everybody looks really delicious. Yeah, what else is like that? If only you had seen that Aaron Eckhart, Catherine Zeta-Jones cook movie. What is that? It was called Yes Chef or Chefing It Up. Yes Chef.

Feeling kind of chef. Okay, I just have to come up with two more. Yeah. And there was uh in uh uh blah blah in oh oh oh in bridesmaids the food that gave them all diarrhea uh uh amanda brooke parren uh was telling me about this scene and i i totally remembered it uh when kevin mccallister makes himself uh macaroni and cheese for his meal. And then he doesn't even touch it because he has to go fight off the bad guy.

What happens to that? Yeah, exactly. It's just sitting there. So they started their onslaught on the house at like six. Yeah, they came back in the evening for sure. It was like, yeah, evening, but not late evening. And a pancake from Uncle Buck. There we go.

We did it. Ten. Oh, Pulp Fiction when he eats the cheeseburger. Oh, yeah. And then drinks that soda. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've never wanted soda more than when he's drinking that Sprite. I still think about that soda.

And the egg from Aliens 3. Yeah. Or whatever. I don't know my aliens from... Here's your next phone call. Dave, Graham, yes, it's me, Kevin from North Carolina.

So I was on a flight going to Florida and there was a father and son in back of me. On our way there, the father says okay, now we're going to begin our descent and the son adds, into madness K-5. K-5. Now we're going to begin our descent. And the sun adds into madness. Okay, bye.

Now we're going to begin our descent. Also, father, you don't need to use airplane lingo. You can just, plane's going to, we're getting ready to land. So here's some gum. The, on the flight to Toronto, the pilot, he something caught in his throat when he began the announcement. No, he was like this. In the middle of the announcement. And then he came back and said, oh, sorry.

Really? Yeah, like it really caught him off guard. I thought I was fighting off a terrorist. Yeah, but he really caught him off guard. Sorry, I was fighting off a terrorist. Yeah, but he's like... Oh, sorry. If you look out the window, you'll see the land. You'll see the land. I'm a very bad pilot.

To your left, you'll see clouds. And to your right, you'll see clouds. We're above the clouds. I drank too much milk before the flight took off. Your final overheard of 2016. Hi, Graham and Dave. This is Katie from Oakland, California.

I'm calling in with an overheard. I was at the grocery store in line and I was behind a mom and probably like a nine-year-old boy. They were looking at the M&ms and the mom said oh i'm never having an m&m again and then her son said but they're celebrating 75 years it's their birthday come Come on. Yeah.

Sometimes you have. I love M&M's. It's my favorite candy. Really? Oh, God. Now I can't think about that. Oh, what a dumb candy. When you go to New York, do you go to the M&M's store in Times Square?

You gotta. What are you? Peanut? Plain? Peanut. Just after a few, they all just kind of gets a weird taste in your mouth you know what i love the crunchy m&ms not the pretzel ones the crunchy oh they have some kind of malt yeah they got like a cookie oh yeah the best uh our our friend no one had that watermelon yeah yeah yeah oh yeah during the break eddie had watermelon and and was eating it in the same way that, like,

somebody who hasn't eaten in a year eats anything. Yeah, because the only sugar he's allowed himself is watermelon. He was dipping it in ketchup. Yeah. One of the only times, one of the first times, let's face it, the only time I've ever bonded with past guest Erica Sigurdsson. Yeah. We both put up walls.

What she told me about when she goes to the movies, she gets a thing of popcorn and a bag of peanut M&Ms, pours the M&Ms into the popcorn, and then you get a little bit of sweet with your salty. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. And they melt a little bit. That's kind of... Wow. That's yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. And they melt a little bit. That's kind of... Wow.

That's interesting. Yeah, the weird thing is, like, I've... At this point in my life, I only ever buy snacks at the movie theater out of tradition. Yeah.

I don't want them. Well, I don't. Like, I don't... Where else do I just sit and, like, eat a whole bag of candy? Yeah. It's insane. But then at the movie theater, you're like, yeah, I guess.

I love Twizzlers until I think about, oh, there's just a big red wad of wax in my stomach now. Yeah. And I could have just eaten the shell of a baby bell. Yeah, but it's... Yeah, exactly. Same color and everything. But yeah, I just do it because I do it. Not because I want.

That's weird. Silver price too. You ever had a Burger King in a movie theater? No. 20 bucks. That would be so, I mean. And you get to be the guy who brings your stinky Burger King into the theater. Plane or movie theater.

It's like someone brings like a whole meal. Like, come on, eat at home. That, I think. That bothers me. I'd rather someone talk than that. No, maybe not. But if the guy's talking while eating Burger King. They did make it my way.

You're like, oh, great. Sometimes I'll get McDonald's and I'll drive like in the drive-thru and I'll eat it and then get out of the car, go in the house, go to bed, come out the next day, my car still stinks. Four minutes of McDonald's. Yeah. It never goes. I don't think you could ever renovate a McDonald's to be anything else. Certainly not a Curbs. So that does bring us to the end of the episode.

Eddie, do you have some things you would like to plug? I'd like to plug my podcast on this podcast. Yeah. The Barely Friending Podcast. You can find it on iTunes, on Spreaker as well. Oh, you got that on Spreaker? Spreaker. Yeah.

Where my Spreaker head's at. Spreak me out. And you can add me and my co-host, MJ Riggins, who's a very, very funny comedian as well, on Instagram and Facebook and Twitter and check it out, Barely Friending. Are you on Snapchat? Yeah, I love snapping. Really? Love it.

What are you on Snapchat? At Eddie Delas, E-D-D-I-E-D-E-L-L-A-S. Are you on Snapchat? No. No. I don't know what it is. I am too old to be on Snapchat. You're wrong.

There's a lot. Your phone would blow up. Oh, yeah. It won't let me. It won't let me download it. There are. It seems to be that most people on Snapchat are either 15 or 49. There's a lot of like, hey, Snapchat's been around for a few years.

I've been around For many years I'm gonna join I had it When it first came out I had it With Snapchat I've had it up to here

I had it And tried it For a couple weeks And I was like This is dumb I had it And I never went back And now it's the most

It's like the number one Number one No thanks I'm out I'm out But thank you very much for being our guest. Thanks for having me, guys. Always a lot of fun.

So fun. If you like the show. Here's one thing I want to plug. We're going to Saskatoon. That's not what it was. Oh, sorry. One thing I would like to plug is while I was in Toronto, I was a guest on a podcast called Let's Drink About It. Sure.

And you can download that. Now, let me plug our show in Saskatoon. October 8th in Saskatoon. Yeah, it'll be the biggest thing happening in Saskatoon that night. So just look for the opening night lights. Yeah, the

cross the sky. And we'll put a link for tickets on the episode recap, as well as our show in Edmonton on October 7th and our show in Victoria on October 22nd. We are seeing the sights. Yeah, we love to watch the leaves change all over this great land. Yes, absolutely.

And if you like the show, head over to MaximumFun.org. Check out the blog recap, pictures and videos relating to the content of this episode. Maybe... Mac and me. Oh, yeah.

Especially that dance scene inside the McDonald's. It's insane. Okay. Yeah, what else do we... Oh, Stan Lee and all his crazy creations. Yeah, sure.

That gourmet hot dog place that used to be a laundromat. I don't think we're going to put a picture of a gourmet hot dog place. What about a picture of the place that was a Curves, but it was a ladies' journey? I didn't take a picture of it. Oh, but surely they have a website. My sitcom, my movie, Eddie and the Cats. Was it Eddie and the Cats? What was it called?

I can't remember my own movie. Yeah. And there's no picture of it because it does not exist. We're not doctoring that up. But thank you so much for listening. And if you want, you can leave a review on iTunes. That would be real. Don't review us on Spreaker.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Although, review us on Snapchat. Give us a nice Snapchat review. And, uh, hashtag free the nipple on Instagram. Yes. Um,

and free, and do it for the Gipper. Yeah. Hashtag free the nipple, hashtag do it for the Gipper. Win one for the Gipper. Hey, thanks so much for listening.

Uh, and join us, uh, back here next week for another episode of Style Podcasting Yourself. Maximumfun.org. Comedy and culture.

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