Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 451 - Phil Hanley

Episode Date: November 7, 2016

Comedian Phil Hanley returns to talk crowd work, hockey, and ferry boats.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 451 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who I think is an expert at if there's urine in your carpet, this is the guy to talk to. Because he knows the formulas, how to sop it up, what the procedures are, Mr. Dave Shumka. formulas, how to sop it up, what the procedures are.

Mr. Dave Shumka. Yeah, I do a vinegar water solution, then baking soda, and then it's pretty much good. You can do a dish soap as well. But then you also put down a paper towel. Well, that's just so people know not to step on it. Oh, see? But I wouldn't even. Oh, yeah. I would have gone like pine.

What are they called? One of those cones? Pine cones? Yeah. I would have gone gone pine cones so they do it in the woods and that voice you hear is our guest uh for today uh a return guest to the podcast uh he is uh starring in a movie that is it going to be something people can download uh i think it's going to be i'm sure at some point i think we're hoping that it'll go, it's going to go to like festivals and then. And it's called Sundowners.

Sundowners, yeah. And our guest is Phil Hanley. Hello. Hi Dave. Hi Graham. Nice to see you guys. Yeah. Thanks for coming back on the show.

No, this is good. I'm excited. Should we get to know us? Yeah, let's do that. Get to know us. Phil. Yes. It's been a while. Yeah. Yeah. It's been a while. Yeah. Get to know us Now, was it just one senior or two seniors? It was one senior. And then she, there was a dude who was like, wasn't quite a senior, but he was like older. Yeah. But you were living, I think.

With your dream life. You were with people twice your age. Yeah. It was the best. Then, and like. What was great about it? Yeah. Early bedtime.

Yeah. Early bedtime. Great sex. Jello with little fruit in it. Yeah. Candy. Candy dish. Always always full um no it was it was uh because where did i live oh it was it's just it was a this massive apartment right in uh the west village which is like my favorite neighborhood and like just so crazy expensive

to live there right but it was it was like a it was a great deal it was she was really cool had she been living there since the 70s since the 70s yeah so she had all these great stories

and I love that part of New York and she had all these great stories because you know the neighborhoods like changed so much whatever

she used to be Paul Simon's girlfriend like I suck Lou Reed's dick I saw Lou Reed walk by in in that neighborhood once though

but she she had all these great stories and she she was just like, yeah, she was great. But we had asbestos. Okay, sure. There was like asbestos removal, and the apartment was so big that her side was affected first. And it like, yeah, she could tell it was like, you know, going to be bad. So I had to go. So did she, did the apartment building, like they were bad so i had to go so did she did the apartment

building like they were like we have to redo all the suites yeah no it was like a spess it was like in between the bricks oh yeah and uh yeah so they had to remove that how could you how does it work like yeah and what is it is it fireproofing it's uh it's insulation oh that's why they used it yeah like a really really effective insulator and you know what as long as it stays sealed it's not a problem yeah but for some reason they were unsealing it yeah if you unseal it then the particles then you start breathing in it and that's when you don't like that that's when you don't think that's good no i mean i don't you know i'm not for asbestos or against asbestos why they don't just leave it yeah i don't think that's good? Nah, I mean, I don't, you know, I'm not for asbestos or against asbestos.

I don't know why they don't just leave it. Yeah, I don't know why they, well, because like a lot of schools, they started taking it apart. Yeah. And, but it. Because kids like to pick at the wall. Yeah, that's, yeah. And, you know, like a lot of those grade one, grade two, they've got hamsters. Yeah.

And those hamsters like to get into, you know, nooks and crannies. Yeah. got hamsters yeah and those hamsters like to get into uh-huh you know nooks and crannies yeah um so uh and and these people were both retired that you look uh yeah yeah yeah yeah you so you had the run of the play oh yeah i was like a young buck just going wild did you did did hanging out with older people make you feel more young like like more virile? I felt spry. Yeah. Well, yeah, they were just cool. But I swear, that's like a New York thing.

Like people will have more so than like, say, maybe in another city. You will have like this old guy who's like a buddy or whatever that you meet at a coffee shop. Oh, really? You'll just have old friends? Yeah. Like I think that's more common there for some reason. I don't know. You just kind of,

yeah. It's also very common in, in London. If you go to a, like a pub, there'll be young people and old people all in the same. Yeah. Yeah. It's the classes that divide.

Yeah, that's true. I mean, you know, you've got to divide along somewhat. Sure. Yeah. You have to be of noble birth to compete.

Oh, yes. Is that from A Knight's Tale? I think it's from that Pulp album. So now, so that's no longer living with a senior citizen. Yeah, no, that's done. Living with somebody your own age? Yep. How does that feel?

It's all right. Not quite as good As the desserts No Oh younger than you Yeah You're the senior Yeah I'm the senior Yeah

The tables What is it? Something's changed What's that really Common expression? The tables have changed Oh oh really Oh not the tables

Have changed Yeah New tables You've changed the tables Oh yeah New tables. What are these, ping pong tables? Yeah, didn't you used to have a regular table?

No, it's a pool table. It's always been a pool table. Have you ever known anybody that had a table that wasn't a table? Oh. That they were like, now it's just. Chandler and Joey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What did they have?

Foosball. Foosball table. Oh, okay. Would they eat off it? I think they put a thing on top Yeah. Yeah. They have a foosball foosball table. Okay. Would they eat off it? I think they put a thing on top. It was like a glass thing on top. I knew a guy who had an apartment, uh,

in New York who had a, it was a, he had a bathtub and his, it was like one of those crazy apartments and he had a bathtub in the kitchen. Oh yeah. And he had a, he put a piece of wood over top of it and that would be a table. Yeah.

Yeah. I, uh, do the dishes in it uh like there's a couple friends that i've had over the years that have had that crazy apartment like it's a loft space that maybe you're not supposed to live in yeah and then they've kind of jerry-rigged something to be a shower those are never a pleasant showering experience yeah and it's like the shower i remember this one friend like it was clearly just a garden hose that he had like staple gun to the wall yeah and it went from the sink to create and then like attached a shower head to it oh right you had to turn on the shower over here and then get into it oh you like had to turn on

the sink yeah yeah yeah wow so i was like this isn't, you're not legally supposed to be showering and living. You should have just got a sprinkler. You should have gone the whole way. Yeah, just have it on the floor. Like a wet banana. Yeah, or just the back and forth one and he jumps through it in the morning. The Little Mountain Gallery has a lot of like, it's got two bathrooms now. I don't know if it always had two bathrooms.

Oh, yeah. And it used to have bunk beds hidden in one of the walls uh illegal yeah how hidden um there was like a wall that it's the still the wall still yeah uh but now it's just storage but yeah it was like a slide away wall like in uh like a no no no not like you pull a book. I mean, dare to dream. Yeah. But they didn't have a shower set up. They just had a YMCA or a community center nearby. Who would sleep in the bunk beds?

Aaron Salazar. Oh, yeah, the guy who used to run it. Oh, really? Yeah. I could see that space more than I can see some of the spaces I've known people that have lived in, that they've turned into living spaces you know they've got like some weird stove that they yeah dragged up the street they uh or when i don't know in new york you'll be like they'll be maybe it'll happen in vancouver because it's so expensive but they'll just like

make they'll just take an apartment what was an apartment in like the 60s which was like an acceptable place to live and then we'll just divide it in, what was an apartment in like the 60s, which was like an acceptable place to live. And then we'll just divide it in half. Right. So clearly, this is my half kitchen. You know what I mean? It's like that. Like you get the half of the kitchen that just has the sink and then your next door

neighbor has the stove. Yeah. So you just knock and I need to. Well, we, this house has four suites in it. And I think when it was built, it was one. Yeah. It was one house. This basement would have just been dirt.

Okay. The top floor would have just been an attic. And then the middle floor, dirt. Also dirt. Yeah. Two floors of dirt. And instead of stairs, dirt slide. A lot of these old houses used to be just houses.

Before they were all kind of like subdivided and like they were just mansions. Can you hear your neighbors? Yeah. Okay. I mean, walking. But you don't hear them all the time? I hear them going up the steps because we have front doors next to each other. Oh, okay.

So I can live with that. Yeah. Yeah. I live in a house and I can hear everything. Everything. You can live with that? I don't know if you're asking me to stay here or not but yeah i'm like cool if you want me to in the place that you live now upstairs neighbors downstairs neighbors are you top floor bottom floor fourth floor yeah penthouse my yeah that's uh that to me is as good as it get not having

anybody above you you ever go on the roof No? I've never been on the roof. You can, though. There's like a fire escape. There's like a really scary looking fire escape. That sounds very romantic. You and your student could go up there. You and your ward, I guess. Yeah, teach them about the stars. Yeah.

What do you know about the stars? You know, I know the astrological signs. How many of the astrological signs could you find in the stars? Oh, find? No, no. I'm going to be like,

this is where that comes from. What can you, what constellations would you be able to pick out? Oh, Brian's belt. Oh, Brian's belt. Yeah.

Big Brian's belt. Yeah. Yeah. The, uh, dipper, the dipper, two different sizes. Oh yeah. Yeah, the Dipper. The Dipper. Two different sizes.

Oh, yeah. Big, little. Are they also bears? Is there like an Ursa Major and Ursa Minor? Oh, yeah. Are those stars? No, they're constellations. Shaped like bears?

Yeah, well, no. I mean, use your imagination. Yeah, whenever they draw the constellation, you're like, well, I don't see how you got that shape out of it. Oh, right, yeah, no. I mean, use your imagination. Yeah, whenever they draw the constellation, you're like, well, I don't see how you got that shape out of it. Oh, right, yeah, yeah. But people didn't used to have phones or TV, so they just would stare at space forever. And there didn't used to be clouds.

Yeah. So you could see the sky a lot better. I have heard, though, that cities make it a lot harder to see just because it's so much light pollution or whatever. Yeah, and then somebody was quoting somebody who's been on the moon that if you go when you're on the moon, basically because so much of the light from distant stars doesn't make it there. I don't know what song that is. Isn't that Walking on the Moon? Yeah.

Yeah, nice. But yeah, it's like a sheet of white when you're up there, because there's no distance. You can see the farthest star and the closest star. Oh, really? So you just see, it's just bright, like a wall of light. Wow. That we don't get to see that.

Yeah, we get ripped. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we get ripped. What a rip. What if they went up there and everybody on the moon saw something super cool that we, and they were like, shh, like don't. Yeah. That'll just be the moon club. Yeah.

Well, every profession you have like, you know, secrets or whatever. Comics, we know shit. Yeah. So, I'm sure astronauts, musicians. Yeah. Astronauts. Yeah. I mean.

I think they know some stuff. They played golf on it. Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty cool. Yeah. I wonder if they all had a thing that they wanted to do on the moon. Like, I want to flip a pizza dough.

That would be a great activity, actually. would it come down eventually would it well they're pretty quick like they don't float there's gravity on the moon oh but yeah there's much yeah you can you hop oh okay i mean giant steps are what you take i heard that walking. Walking on the moon. I have heard that. I hope my legs don't break. Well, they wouldn't. Because you're lighter. Sting was at a show. I did a show in New York and Sting was in the crowd.

Oh, yeah? Yeah, with that jazz guy. He's like a young- Tito Puente? Yeah. So Sting and Tito walk in. No, there was like this, like that.

He's like a young jazz guy. Okay. Blonde hair. Do you know what I'm talking about, Dave? You know him. Young, blonde jazz guy. Not Harry Connick Jr., but another guy. Not Michael Bublé.

Blonde. No. But I love Shumka's Bublé joke. What, that his friends always call him Boobs? Yeah. So we have that in common? Wasn't that the joke? You're like, his friends call him Boobs, so we have that in common. I that the joke? You're like You're like His friends call him Boob

So we have that in common I think you probably You punched it up Oh right Yeah What? Who's that? Oh I want to know

This young Young blonde jazz guy Who sings Concubine Oh I forget his name You totally recognize him Yeah I recognize him And I don't have my

So Sting and Jazz Jazzbo Yeah Jazzbo Yes Yeah they were I'm my so Sting and Jazz Jazzbo yeah Jazzbo yes yeah they were I'm googling Sting Jazzfriend

yeah they were they were at a show did that throw you at all I don't think I knew I think it would it would right well yeah

just anytime you see someone that you've seen so many times yeah in pictures or whatever and then you see them in person it's like weird

you can't like look weird. Is it this guy? Yeah, I believe that is. That's him. What is it? Chris Boddy? Yeah, you're a huge, you're a big bod guy. Yeah, Chris Boddy.

Never heard of this. Oh, really? Maybe that's not him. So wait, because you're doing comedy in New York. There must be famous people. Yeah. Hot and cold running. And you do a lot of crowd work. Do you ever talk to Sting?

No, I've never talked to Sting. He chatted, though. He came and chatted with us afterwards. He was really nice. Now, that's a weird thing because... I'm into comedy, man. Yeah. I would never go after a show and talk to people that had performed.

Was he wearing his trademark uh striped sweater he was dressed like in dune just a loincloth summer yeah it was summer he was all greased up um but like is that is that a weird thing like i think famous people do that famous people do that because when i was in uh toronto this summer there was they do what they introduce themselves they just come backstage they're like hey like neil patrick harris came to a couple of shows in the fringe really and then he just went yeah he did that same thing he just went backstage and talked to the cast and i was like why are you so sure the cast wants to yeah talk to you like i mean i think they did yeah i

wanted to talk to stink big time yeah but it's weird to have that imagine having that level of confidence yes so bizarre that you're like well i'm gonna go talk to these people that just put on a put on a shoe yeah yeah i guess as when you're a certain point like if you're on tv every day or on the radio you played a child doctor on tv yeah like what what's the cutoff though like if vinnie delpino from doogie hauser yeah is it a show i don't think he what if the guy who played turtle came back would that be too like jerry ferrero would that be too low of a level or is he he's gotta know his room if he's on if he's on like at the joe rogan tour right but if he like he has to know that they're going to be excited to see him yeah i see but if yeah yeah like i mean i think you

could feel like pretty secure in the fact you could go to any community theater production and come back and be like turtle's here turtle was at a little shop it would be really humiliating finding that line well that's what i mean there's some people like stings obviously yeah he's he's key to the city yeah yeah yeah like anywhere but there's gonna be someone who's like a direct like a community theater director who's like turtles here i'm gonna get him to come back and he does not want to go back Oh that's true too Yeah Oh yeah Well like Also like

You know If the other I don't know who the other members Of the police The entourage are Well There's E Yeah

There's Adrian Gorenje There's Vinny Vinny Chase Yeah There's Johnny Drama Johnny Drama

He's bananas There's Suits So what if Johnny Drama If he Would he be allowed to come back at a comedy club and yeah say hi uh you'd be allowed to yeah i think yeah i don't yeah would that be a welcome gesture i don't know it's just weird yeah i yeah i mean yeah it would be weird yeah like why why can't he just enjoy the show and then be like, well, that was good.

I'll tweet about it. I'm Sting, you know? Or is Sting like, you know what? I should go backstage so I don't get hounded by people out here. Oh, that's. I'll go hang out there for a few minutes. Yeah, that could be true. Also, I wonder, because you know how there's like a lot of, like i think there's in comedy there's a lot of

people that maybe would have been musicians had they been able to pull that off yeah do you think that the reverse do you think there's some musicians that are like people say that people say that and you some there are certain i've been at shows and stuff where i've been like oh this guy thinks he's funny like the singer or whatever has something to say between each song. Yeah. He's doing bits. Yeah. Yeah. Just do the lyrics. Who? I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think.

Cause that's the whole thing that musicians want to become. Yeah. People say that, but I'm like, there's no way you actually want to be a comic. If you're like a really successful musician. Yeah. No.

Like, I mean, John, you know, John Mayer just wants to show that he could do it all. Yeah. But yeah. Dave Grohl is just really do it all. Yeah. But yeah. Dave Grohl is just really nice and charming.

Yeah, people say he's funny. But, you know, he's just likable, I think. Yeah. I don't think he's got much material. Yeah, he doesn't have like a solid 45. I wonder, though. He's got his five. Yeah, he's got a killer tight five.

He can do a TV set. Yeah, Carson invited him over to the couch after a Nirvana set. Yeah, it was like that drummer. You guys stay over there. And it made his career. Oh, that would be the best if you were a comedy duo and Carson only invited one half. I didn't like the straight man. Bring over the funny guy.

Get over here, teller. Yeah. Yeah, it's a uh i don't know yeah i don't know why why a musician that's that you know been revered forever wants to do comedy but yes they're hitting the mics but maybe yeah maybe because like in the 80s it wasn't uncommon for a comic to open up for a musician that was like a well kind of established conceit yeah i think people try to do that now but it's it's always bad always bad like it's a tough gig does it work in like vegas yeah maybe i think if you're somewhat famous of a car i don't know because if you go like if you've played the commodore before right yeah have you opened for bands there

uh no could you imagine how ugly that would be? It would be awful because everybody's getting drinks. Imagine being the opening band. Sean Devlin did it quite a bit, I think. Opening for bands? Yeah, I think he did. And Bobcat Goldthwait opened for Nirvana when they would go on tour. And I can't imagine how bad that would have gone.

Yeah. But like, I remember watching something like Star Search and they'd be like, this person's opened for the Pointer Sisters. Linda Ronstadt. Yeah. Yeah. The Judds. And I remember even as a kid being like, yeah guess that's good is that good i think i think

people i think maybe audiences were a little different back then it would be rough now i think yeah well right now a guy who did he opened for michael buble oh yeah all over the place oh right yeah tim reicher yeah and i know uh ryan adams had people open comics open for him in the last couple years i had a friend that did it and but his crowd probably is a bit more mellow

it could be a little and maybe like a little more like comedy savvy right maybe I don't know but and did your friends that did it

say it was good yeah I think yeah he said it was I think he said one show was really good and one show was like okay yeah

I think that's what he said it's a weird like if I was going to a music show and then they're like but first 20 minutes yeah observational 20 minutes of listening like don't do anything just sit there don't say anything yeah before that song you like yeah okay yeah you know uh that was weird yeah you guys seen this commercial? Oh, that would be brutal. I remember when I was maybe like 14 and I went to go see Weird Al Yankovic. They had a stand-up guy, a local guy open for him.

That's good. It was good, but it still didn't work because... What else would you have open for Weird Al Yankovic? I think you just need to just start. I think you just need to be Weird Al because it's mostly kids in the audience. When we saw Paul McCartney, it was, they don't have an opening act. They just have a DJ who plays like Beatles songs. Really?

Like remixes. Oh, okay. Yeah. So then everybody can go and get drinks. For how long? Did you guys go together to see Paul McCartney? Yeah. Just you two? No. And my brother and Abby. Oh, okay, cool. Yeah. Yeah. So then everybody can go and get drinks and. For how long? Did you guys go together to see Paul McCartney? Yeah. Just you two?

No. And my brother and Abby. Oh, okay, cool. Yeah. I held hands with Dave's brother. Yeah, I was going to say, how was yesterday? There was a woman there that like, she was, she was so happy to be there. I've never seen anybody so happy to be anywhere as this woman.

And then she just kept making out with her boyfriend. Like this is a like she's probably in her late 40s early 50s yeah and uh but she's just transported her back to the days yeah it was was the show great yeah yeah it was really good i love that his drummer he's got lots of energy yeah abe what. What's his name? Abe. Abe? Have you seen him live? No, no, no, I have not. But I've seen, you know, I've watched, you know, whenever he plays a Super Bowl or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a bit of a bummer because my brother had seen him in Portland

and Seattle the days leading up. And my brother was like, he was doing all the same banter between songs. And my brother was like saying, here's the joke he's going to tell now. Oh, what a bummer. I guess you do settle into like, hey, that worked in Portland. Might as well try it again tonight. Oh, so we do little jokes? Yeah.

And like tell a little story leading into each song. And it was word for word, the same story, the same like beat. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah. I think that's an old school showbiz thing. You think? Yeah. Because it wasn't that, and I'm going to screw this up, really? Okay, yeah. I think that's an old school showbiz thing. You think? Yeah, because it wasn't that,

and I'm going to screw this up, but didn't someone like Fred Armisen or someone work at like Radio City Music Hall and Liberace was there for a month and each time Liberace would be like, this couple, it's their 20th anniversary and they met at our, I probably got that.

That was, yeah. It was Liberace at a Fred Armisen show Exactly He was on Portlandia And Oh so he would always Every night But it would be

But it was something That really got people Like you know Giving goosebumps Like this was You know they met At one of my concerts And now this is

Their 20th wedding anniversary And they're here tonight Please everybody Give a round of applause For Ethel and Right Oh wow Ethel and, you know. Right. Oh, wow. Ethel and Ned.

But apparently he would do the same thing every night. Same names and everything? Yeah, I don't know if he said the names, but he did the same thing that they, like, met at one of his concerts.

But he wouldn't be 20th anniversary. He would just be like, Oh, yeah. Yeah, no, he would just be like, I know they're here. Like, you know. Right.

Like, and then, yeah, the spotlight shines on them. Yeah, two dudes. Yes. be like, I know they're here. Like, you know. Like, and then, yeah, the spotlight shines on them. Yeah, two dudes. Yes. A dude and his dog. What? Ethel? Yeah.

Yeah, so I think that's an old showbiz-y thing. Well, I remember opening for a comic whose whole act is crowd work. And the first night I saw him, I was like, boy, oh boy, this guy's like, how did he do it? And then the second show is like, oh, he finds that thing in every single crowd. He finds like a guy that's

wearing a funny shirt or the guy that's on a date or whatever. With his dog? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What's going on? gonna sorry don't worry um so uh but you do crowd work i do yeah do you don't do you double up do you or do you just every night's a blank slate uh yeah it's pretty yeah every night's a blank slate i have like uh yeah i mean i might do i have i have like a couple lines couple stock lines yeah to keep going like two yeah and i might not like say for example i don't think i did it all weekend i just have a couple things just to get out sometimes you just get in this like

crazy right quagmire like oh jesus all right sorry and then so you just eat but yeah no i try i don't i don't, I just try to just talk and see what happens. Because you're very good at it. Oh, thanks. Yeah, it's fun. At the crowd work and on Friday night during the show, there was a woman on the early show, I think.

Yeah. Who, she was up from California. Very good looking woman. Yeah. And I just assumed California, she was an actress. Uh-huh. And she wasn't though. No.

She was a sergeant yeah she's in the military yeah yeah yeah yeah and you were very funny with her just off the cuff and oh thanks yeah yeah because that's always uh because i often ask people what they do i'm kind of fascinated with people who have real jobs yeah like i really like it's just crazy it is crazy that people every day yeah sometimes i think about that where i'm like huh so you're gonna be that thing most likely until you retire yeah like i you know if it's somebody who's kind of in their you know late 20s early 30s the chances are like if you're a sergeant you're going to be a military person until. Yeah. I guess maybe the military is the one where you kind of can check out and then go back. Go AWOL.

Yeah. Yeah, you go AWOL. Yeah. Become a civilian, work at a radio shack. Yeah. Radio shack. But that's a weird thing. Like some, you know, talking about celebrities who want to be a comedian one day.

Right. After they're a musician for 30 years. But then there's one there's celebrities who want to then just have a regular job like i'm shack and i'm a sheriff yeah i feel that's rare though right that a celebrity wants to go and i think with like child actors there's a lot of them that were like that's i'm fine i did the good for them yeah i was on a tv show chances are i'm not gonna be on another yeah you know like the the older brother on the wonder years i think he like he like started up his own company and it's like now a millionaire from oh

really you know or like uh i don't well i don't know if the Wahlbergs make the burgers. Oh, right. Yeah. Do you think? Maybe Donnie. Do they ever show up and just flip a couple of burgers and, hey, that was fun. Let me sign your burger. Yeah.

Signs it with a mustard pen. Yeah, I don't know. Like, there's not a ton of. What would you do if you were, let's say, your... Oof. The guy from How I Met Your Mother, whose name I don't know. Okay, sure. So, I'm the guy who was on that show.

Uh-huh. And now I'm done. I don't want to be part of show business anymore. I would probably go something showbiz adjacent, like... Usher. Yeah. Usher. Ticket terror.

Busker. No, you know, like either like something like entertainment law or PR or, you know, work at an advertising. Like something where it's like at least something that I know can carry over. Sure. I don't know if you could then like, how long do you have to go to law school? Oh yeah.

That's, but I think there's probably fast track for celebrities. I got to assume. Starfucker University. Yeah. I went to SFU. Is there? Wow. Yeah. That's good. Starfucker University yeah I went to SFU is there wow yeah

that's good it took me I'm a dyslexic it took a while but you got there as long as we all got there yeah well we're all there that was quick as shit

you should do crowd work oh yeah no I I have a bit that I say this couple broke up at my show yeah

20 years ago and they're here and here tonight here are their corpses that I say this couple broke up at my show 20 years ago. And they're here and here tonight. Here are their corpses. Here's a picture of their corpses. Pass it around so everyone can see.

But didn't, for a weird period of time, didn't Clint Eastwood, he like, He was a mayor. Mayor or sheriff of a town? I want to say mayor. I think it was a movie.

He was definitely a sheriff at some point in the movies. Carmel, California or something. Oh, mayor, okay. And then Mickey Rourke. Oh yeah, Mickey Rourke. Sonny Bono was a politician as well. Oh, Al Franken. Jesse the Body Ventura.

That one's just like... The Governator. And then he went away and then he's come, I mean, has he come back? I guess so. The Governator? Yeah. Why do they call him that? I don't know.

I only know him as a governor. So a lot of his campaign phrases, woof, right over my head. I'll be back. Where did he go? He said. Hasta la vista, deficit. Right over my head. I'll be back. Where did he go? He said. Hasta la vista, deficit. What would you, if you weren't a comedian? I was just thinking that.

I was just thinking that. I don't know. Like if tomorrow, for whatever reason, you change your mind. Yeah, I don't want to do comedy anymore. What do you think would be the profession you'd... Yeah, I was just, when you were talking about that, I was just racking my brain. Nothing pops up?

No. Yeah, I don't know. Everything's really unappealing. Yeah. Like, really? Can you think of what you would do? I would probably, just based on the couple of people I know that have done it, I'd probably be all right at being a private detective because you just have to sit in a car and take photos

yeah i always claim i'd be a good detective yeah because i watch those shows yeah which one csi yeah or whatever you know like if there's like a uh oh uh did you watch um what was that hbo show with uh with john john tuturo oh the night night of yeah i was watching that man i was like you were putting clues together i was completely wrong but i was quite confident as i put the show together have you ever done one of these escape rooms no oh that's if you like detective shows escape rooms are up your alley what's this escape rooms like they give you uh you've got you go in a room go in a room with like a group of three or four friends uh yeah and they give you uh you've got you go in a room go in a room with like a group of three or four friends uh yeah and they give you kind of this is the mystery you have to solve

yeah and then you use things in the room you've got to figure it out wow really yeah yeah so you gotta make see is this book to have anything in it does if i turn the clock handle does that do anything really yeah yeah wow yeah have you done handle That's not the name of that A hand? Yeah, a hand Have you done that? Yeah, yeah Really? Yeah, it was fun

Were you good? Yeah, our group solved it Before the time was up So Yeah, I'd like to do that Yeah, yeah I just think you see those guys That drive around

You know, wear a trench coat Coffee Shoot the shit They have like a partner Buddy I think nowadays Wearing a trench coat Would

You would stand out Yeah that would I'd be old school I'd wear one of those Sherlock Holmes hats Pipe But it almost like If it makes it that obvious

They'd be like Well he couldn't be The detective Yeah He's dressed like that He's got that giant That giant magnifying glass Yeah I think That would be a cool job I don't think Again it's like Entertainment lawyer giant magnifying glass.

Yeah, I think that would be a cool job. I don't think, again, it's like entertainment lawyer. I think you got to do, you'd have to go to a police academy. Yeah. You'd probably have to have a contact at the police to help you out with things. That's the crazy, when in my neighborhood now, there's like a 7-Eleven, there's always like cops there. Yeah. And there's just young like guys and girls.

And I'm just like, what are you like? It's crazy that your job is so insane. Yeah. And it's driving around New York and busting people. And it's also weird because. Dangerous. Yeah.

Totally. Yeah. And I always thought of, uh, cops is older than me. And now that has, that is most definitely changed. Yeah.

Yeah. Where I'm like, Oh, you're, you're, you're you're you're a kid you're a child yeah uh you let me hold the gun for a while yeah come on your fair is fair come on come on um dave what would you do if you if you just tomorrow if you didn't no more podcasts no more books no more teachers dirty looks

um i like yours entertainment detective entertainment detective oh that would be good oh that would be good because you'd still get to hang out on a lot of sets yeah i get to have the catering go backstage after a show yeah oh that is uh he stole my line i'll get it back for you i don't know i'll get it back for you it's like a kid's book um i that is one of my favorite things though on law and order where they would be investigating an entertainment related death and then they they go backstage to ask questions like that's the most convenient place yeah to ask somebody questions pertaining to a murder like right after the show yeah they're still wearing their wig and whatever smoke in the air uh i mean it's atmospheric yeah um uh yeah i guess detective i don't know it's weird though because like when

you're because nothing in showbiz relates to anything that you could do in real life yeah like yeah you yeah like as a comic you're not trained for any thing you're gonna crack a lot of cases you know what i mean did you go to school for anything before comedy? No, I just went to high school Oh, and that's another thing The small, like to work with the same people for a week Yeah Like just the smallest thing at a, you know, the weekend or whatever

Yeah Like someone will do the smallest thing and you're like, oh my God So, I can't imagine, yeah No, I just, no, I went to high, no, yeah, I just went to high school So you mean like being in an office with the same people all the time? Could you imagine? I've worked in offices and it's weird. Yeah.

That you see the same. You do have to be an adult about it. Oh, right. Yeah. See, maybe that'd be something I could try. You have to be like, oh, this person has their own experiences and they're not, they're not out to get me with this weird tick of theirs he's had it in for me since day one it is about tick acceptance in the office place like it's

oh yeah this person's sniffs a lot this person does a clackety clack thing yeah headphones really have have saved the modern uh workforce oh i bet earbuds headphones yeah because imagine when you're back in the days everybody's just on a typewriter oh yeah yeah and you just have to listen to that all day i go nuts man that ding every time the page ding i'm like jesus i think there'll be so many dings around oh yeah maybe you get used to i don't know i'm on edge yeah it's weird because i've worked in places where they're like oh after long enough you won't notice the sound and it never goes away yeah like it's never hygiene issues right where in the office oh sure everywhere yeah in society yeah Either someone stinks or someone wears too much perfume.

I'm out. I quit. Where'd Phil go? He just walked out. And he left a note of grievances. Here's a list of people who stink. You guys made my stink list don't you think it would be

no but it is Dave's right it is part of being an adult but you don't really have to do that if you're a comic no that's true you don't really

have to do that yeah that's true you just skipped over yeah like if like no like is there a great comic that has like a really mature

take on things like like well and that's comic that has like a really mature take on things like uh well and uh that's reasonable yeah or if somebody i always think about the comedian who asks a question like well what what is the deal with this but then does like two minutes of research yeah oh yeah i lost that bit. Yeah. My damn brain. Why do you adopt a highway? Oh, I see. Because it saves taxpayers money. Yeah.

Well. It's just like the sensible comedian. So there's this lady at my work and she's always talking really loud. So I started wearing earbuds. You know, and you got to be compassionate. Everyone has their. Her mother's in the hospital. So it's, you know, we hope she pulls through.

Oh, man. Have you seen these white guys with dreadlocks? They're trying to appreciate another culture. Yeah, it's really something that I respect and something that I would like to do, you know, learn a little more about other cultures. But I'm afraid people would make fun of me. So, you know, I guess I'd lash out.

Yeah. Anyways. Anyways. Hey, sir, what did you think when you put on that shirt this evening? Did I look good in this shirt? Because you do. Yeah, you do. Your colors.

I mean, you're definitely a fall color guy. Autumn. These assholes vaping. I guess they're trying to quit smoking. Yeah. And you know what? I like the smell of the vape better than

I like cigarette smoke. So I would say it's a step in the right direction. You guys know this Guy Fieri guy? Passionate about food. Yeah.

Gotta admire it. He's a little overweight, but I think he's doing his best. You know, it's his body type. I really like this

comedian. It's all about acceptance. Dave, what's going on with you, man? Well, you and I just got back from Victoria. Yeah. We did a show there. We mentioned we also did shows in Edmonton and Saskatoon.

I don't think we thanked everyone for coming. Thanks for coming, everyone. Oh, yeah. And the Victoria show was tons of fun. And it was in this beautiful old church that had been changed to now a performance. That had been burnt down. Yeah. Yeah.

So it was this kind of nice, like the seating was pews. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah. So they haven't changed the interior of it too much. It's got a giant organ. Yeah. Yeah, it was cool. Did you play the organ

yeah no apparently anything you wanted to play it was like adds cost to it oh really yeah because i i tried to while they were doing soundcheck sneak over just to press one key yeah the thing was locked oh what a bummer and there were two like grand pianos there hey maybe we get a grand piano out here that's the three hundred dollars you know what? We're fine. We're fine. Yeah. I'm just going to do the thing that play with my knuckle. And then you're like, hey, get over here. We're splitting this.

Yeah, you'll be out of 50 bucks. Play the other part of Hardin's Hall. They had two grand pianos. We could have done a Billy Joel, Elton John thing. Dueling pianos. Yeah, dueling pianos. Whenever I see two pianos, I always think of that. We did a weekend together, right? Yes, John thing. Dueling pianos. Dueling pianos. Whenever I see two pianos, I always think of that. We did a weekend together, right?

Yes, we did. Dueling pianos. There was a comedy club, and right across the hallway was dueling pianos. Oh. So the people of the dueling pianos were having way more fun than they were at our show. And people kept requesting things that the dueling piano guys didn't know. Because, of course, Billy Joel and Elton John but people were like, Lady Gaga was popular at the time.

So it was like, Lady Gaga, this song. Yeah. The guy was like, well, you know who Lady Gaga likes? David Bowie.

Yeah. So we went to Victoria and yeah, thanks to everyone. A lot of people traveled from out of town. Yeah, from Chicago.

Yeah. Three separate groups of people came from Illinois. They didn't know each other. Yeah, three separate groups of people came from Illinois. They didn't know each other. Yeah, yeah. We met people from Winnipeg and Oregon and Seattle. Yeah, yeah. That's so, you know what a nightmare that would be to come from, like, how many flights and shit?

I have no idea. You would know. Yeah, it would be Illinois, Chicago, like O'Hare to whatever the airport in Victoria. I don't know. I think some people took a ferry. Yeah, I think there was a ferry ride involved. Oh, my goodness. I know.

You guys are like the dead. Yeah. You really are. Yeah. Well, it's sort of because we just drone on for 90 minutes and never really go anywhere. It doesn't really lead anywhere. How dare you? Yeah, huge fan of the dead. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. really lead anywhere. How dare you. Yeah, huge fan of

the Dead. I love it. But last week, Graham and I went to a hockey game. Oh, yeah. Oh, cool. We went to see

the Vancouver Canucks play the Buffalo Sabres. I love the Sabres. Do you? Yeah, the Dead and the Sabres, man. Yeah, it's weird that the Sabres

coach announced that there was some badass that had been circling the ground. Yeah It's weird that the Sabres Coach announced That there was some Badass that had been Circling in the ground Yeah And they Yeah the Hells Angels Were doing security

In the game Beating people with pool cues Yeah It was really weird To have pool cues But But Yeah

I got a footlong hot dog Yep Wow That would really make me feel ill. Oh, it was great. Really? How did you feel afterwards? Great.

Really? Yeah. Wow. Foot long too much? Too much hot dog? Any hot, yeah, I haven't had a hot dog in a long time. Yeah, I think I'd regret it. But you're not a vegematic.

No. No. No, but I just haven't had like a sports dog. A sports dog. Yeah. I didn't have, well, I had a mini donuts. That was my contribution to destroying my body. Good dog though.

Put everything on it. Yeah. I'm not one of these. I don't subscribe to this. No, no. What is it? No ketchup after the age of like eight on your hot dog. Not me.

I do. Anytime we get a hot dog, I say no condiments, no bun, just the hot dogs. Just give it to me in a paper. No chewing. Long.

Um, and, uh, yeah, it was fun. Good game. And we were talking about, uh,

uh, how, uh, uh, do you ever see, see um like they'll do like a time lapse photograph of changing the uh changing an ice rink to a basketball rink yeah yeah i like that basketball rink basketball court yeah and it'll just be like i don't know is i guess it's hours oh i'm sure yeah yeah but know, it goes a bit fast. And Gray had the idea of they should just have a real-time video of it.

Yeah. For Insomniac. Yeah. Oh, that's smart. So that you could just put it on and just watch a team. Yeah. Yeah, change over. Oh, God, can you imagine?

That's a huge job. It is, but I assume They've got everything As You know In pieces That just all Yeah it's modular Yeah

All clicks together We don't We don't have that problem Here anymore Because we don't have A basketball score No But it was the same

Same arena That that would've Yeah yeah And it Tons of cities Have that Where in the same day Like they'll do a

You know Maybe not the same day But A noon do a you know maybe not the same day but a nooner followed by a midnight basketball game how was the game did the Canucks win

yeah they did and it was it was fun it was it's only the second hockey game I've ever been to

in Vancouver yeah I've never been to one here yeah really and you grew up here no no I grew up in outside of Toronto.

Oh, that's right. So I went to lots of Leafs games when I was a kid. Saw the Sabres a bunch of times. Yeah. Oh, sure. Your precious Sabres. I love the Sabres. So, oh, cool.

And would you watch hockey on TV, Dave? Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah, see, I should enjoy something. The reason I have glasses is to watch hockey on TV. Really? I had a prescription, and I didn't ever fill it in. And then I noticed one day, like, it's really hard to see the puck

without getting this prescription done. That would be a good ad for, you know, like a love. Yeah, it was that. And real hockey and video game hockey were, like, the things that made me get glasses. And I had glasses for a while. And then one day, one year you and I went to New York. Yeah.

And you were pointing out signs and like things I couldn't see. So I was like, I guess I got to wear this. Spotting a dime. But yeah, the crazy thing, like, cause you, you were you're saying like yeah you should watch hockey yeah uh the one thing that i started watching is like on tv is golf okay because and i figured out one of the reasons less names to remember because even during the course of the hockey game i was trying to learn just like the names of the people who were just on the ice just then and boy oh boy that's a lot of yeah that's a lot of names yeah well i couldn't even remember

who was the guy that you said was called the honey badger that i would remember yeah hanson yeah yeah and i can't say yeah why do they call him the honey badger because he doesn't give a fuck really yeah it's in there he's a bad man like a honey badger? He's just, he's tenacious. Okay. He gets after it. I like that. He gets a breakaway in every game and scores every five or six. Yeah, but he really.

But are honey badgers tenacious? Have you never seen the video of the guy doing the commentary over the honey badger? No. Oh, it's very funny. Really? Yeah. I'll let you discover it for yourself. Okay.

I don't know a lot about Honey Budgers. Neither did I until this video came out. In the hockey game? Also, they do a lot. This is what I didn't realize, and I think it's changed since the last hockey game I went to. It's more of a constant show than it used to be. It used to be there were these kind of lulls where there was nothing going on and they must be going to commercial right now but yeah and then the

jumbotron would just play like an animated thing of a hot dog jumping into a thing of popcorn or whatever like it was there was no shot to the crowd it's an ad for freud yeah and then it just flashes the word your mother um but yeah this was like anytime there was a stop and play they would go there was like a woman in the stands and she would interview they get people to do like a trivia thing or really yeah and then it would if there was even just a lull they would cut to they play music and they cut to like kids having a

fun time dancing and the cameraman kept going to the same like one cameraman had a crush on this woman yeah this one lady because we saw a lot of her

really yeah and we were like oh big eyebrows are back I think we like it yeah yeah we were talking about

because you know ladies have big eyebrows yeah it's fun you need to tell me. I think I could be a big eyebrow lady. Yeah. I could.

You kidding me? I got tiny little eyebrows. Look at these bad boys. Yeah. I'd be a really. I'm picturing it. I'd be a very beautiful lady. Modern lady.

These days, yeah. I mean, yeah, it would have been tough in the 80s. I feel like the 80s was a good time for big eyebrows. When was it little eyebrows? I feel at one point they were really little. Yeah, maybe that was the 80s Was a good time For big eyebrows When was it Little eyebrows I feel at one point They were really little Yeah

Maybe that was The 90s The 90s Early 2000s Yeah The 80s Or the early 90s Were like Kathy Ireland

Those big Peter Gallagher's Oh yeah Yeah Big eyebrows In the early 90s Early 2000s Well I remember

Early 90s Because early Madonna Had quite a set of eyebrows and then they became more shaped over time. But in the mid 90s there was like

these real drawn on fields. Yeah, I remember there was a time. Yeah. Yeah, because then some people got would shave their eyebrows and get

some people got fake eyebrows tattooed on. Yeah, I did that. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. How much would you regret that now? What do you get like what would you do? I don't know. Get, I did that. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. How much would you regret that now? What do you get,

like, what would you do? I don't know. Get bigger, bigger tattoos, get them touched up. Oh, yeah,

like Groucho? Yeah. Might as well do a stache too, why not? Yeah, it was a fun, it was a fun night out.

Fun night out, yeah. Fun for all ages Yeah I want to do that I'm going to go to I have a friend Who's really into the Knicks

Um And he's going to We're going to start Going to Knicks games That's See that's And you're in New York You've got a lot of options

Yeah Of uh Sports Yep So you're going to Become a basketball guy I liked basketball I mean I

I did all play Like I did all go pro No no But don't sell yourself Yeah Okay Never mind I'll go back Basketball guy. I liked basketball. I mean, I did all play. Like, I did all go pro. No, no. Don't sell yourself. How tall are you? Okay. Never mind. I'll go back.

Never mind, detective. How tall are you? 6'2". Oh, you can make it. Yeah. Can you dunk? I would assume. I would assume.

So, yeah, I think a sporting event's a good thing to do. But you're good at, like, jumping up and touching an awning, right? Yep. event's a good thing to do. But you're good at like jumping up and touching an awning, right? Yep. That's the same thing. Okay. Yeah, the nice thing about a sporting event is it's like, it's this, you know, kind of chunk of time that's not too, like you don't need to do something before or after like a movie. Yeah. Like you can just do the sporting event.

You don't have to do anything before or after a movie either. Well, if you're trying to seal the deal, you better. Bill knows what I'm talking about. You don't have to do anything before or after a movie Well, if you're trying to seal the deal Yeah Oh yeah, and it's over before 10 Usually a sporting event Yeah, perfect But yeah, like then you can do The whole thing there You can eat a thing, you can have a drink there You don't need a, there's no preamble

Or postamble Yeah, I hate a postamble Right? Yeah What do you After a movie or something If you're going on a date Yep

Postamble No thanks Like let's go get a drink If I was with a girl And I wanted to get to know her Or whatever Then yeah Yeah

It's great to go to a movie And then if it's a good movie Then you go have a scotch Or whatever Yeah Talk about it And then you talk about the movie Yeah Some people like to meet Before a movie That's sick Well what are you even Going to talk about Dinner to a movie and then if it's a good movie and then you go have a scotch or whatever. Yeah. Talk about it. And then you talk about the movie. Some people like to meet before a movie.

Yeah. That's sick. Well, what are you even going to talk about? Dinner and a movie. Yeah. Oh, really? But it's really dinner and a movie and then a drink after the movie. Yeah.

Right? Because like. It's tough though. It's tough. How are you? I mean, I never dated as an adult. But what do you. As a kid.

Well, I guess I didn't date as a kid either. But like that thing of just being like being able to have your own schedule. Right. And being a single person like, okay, well, we'll have dinner at this hour. Yeah. Go to the movie and we'll get to know each other. Right. Yeah.

Oh, yeah, that's true. Yeah. Especially if it's like if you're meeting the person for the first time. Yeah. Yeah. Then you. Yeah. And I've also never dated anyone I didn't know.

No. But like movies start at like 730. So how fast do you have to eat dinner? Yeah. Hurry up. Yeah. Well, like, cause you know, sometimes you go to like, you'll go to a nine, you know, nine, nine 30. I mean, 9, 9.30.

I mean, that's pushing it, though. Then the post drink, then you're pushing it into tomorrow. Yeah, totally. I got to work in the morning. Yeah, exactly. I have to detect who stole the red vines off. Play the Knicks now. I wonder if ever a detective would take somebody on a date and be like,

we're going to drive and enjoy the view of this person's apartment. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I brought a picnic. Oh, yeah. Or bring your daughter to work. That would be the best

if you were to date because then you could send her out to go get coffee. Yeah. Oh, boy. She'd be such a little whatever Natalie Portman and the professional.

Just trying to think of like. Yeah. I was thinking like, you know nancy drew or uh an encyclopedia brown but you're right a kid who's along for the ride i guess the professional is the one yeah he's not much of a detective though no he's more of a kill people kind of yeah he's an assassin right yeah leon yeah leon and his crazy plant. Because he loves this plant so much. Oh, I don't remember the plant. Really?

Yeah. Oh, it's like that's the only thing he has in his life until she shows up. Oh, that's right. That's right. And then there's a scene where he's trying to get away and he makes sure the plant gets out of there. I got news for you. He's got nothing in his life. That's the only thing in his life?

It's none of it. Also, he drinks a lot of milk. I remember that being the conclusion. Oh, sure. Oh, he's got nothing in his life that's the only thing in his life it's not also he drinks a lot of milk i remember that being oh sure oh he's weird he like he like goes and he's got like a satchel and he's got all these bottles of milk in it oh yeah that's what do you drink a glass of milk as i don't know no no although i i have i have in the last few weeks really yeah yeah i haven't had a glass of milk in a long time how was it was it great oh yeah oh really it was it hit the spot i think it would i think it would mess with me i mean i've had some chocolate milk here and there oh i have tons of chocolate and i'll drink a lot of yogurt drink as well i remember i started drinking chocolate milk after i saw an ad that it was

like it's the perfect thing to recover after a workout but i skipped the workout and just had um but yeah i had a friend who she like drank a full glass of milk in front of me and it blew my mind yeah yeah i was at a restaurant last week and like a grown man ordered a glass of milk and you tell them like it hadn't happened in a long time the waiter's like i don't know if we have that you see the opening those little milk packets just a minute like trying to be sneaky when were we on the ferry looking at that the the machine that yeah the milk the and we're like is there a bag in there yeah like is it a bag or is it just like a tube that's specifically made for that machine? Oh, right. Like a milk keg? Yeah. Like a keg with a...

Yeah. Tap this milk. A milk keg. Exactly. I don't know. Yeah. It's weird. I haven't...

Do you buy milk? Do you... No. You don't put it on cereal? I don't eat cereal. Coffee at home? No. No, I don't have coffee at home.

Really? No. Do you go out for coffee every morning? No, I just... I'll drink it here. And then, you know, sometimes if I'm just out, I'll incidentally drink it. But the rest of the time I, yeah, it's weird. I haven't bought milk in like, but it's always

a thing. Like I always end up in that area of the grocery store just because that's the pattern that you walk. Great place to be chicks, right? Milk? Yeah. Milk aisle?

Yeah. Dairies? Yogurts? Kitty litter aisle, probably. Oh, that's true. Lots of ladies got the cats. Yeah, and you could be like a gentleman and help pick up the litter. I'm a litter sommelier.

Emphasis on the smell. You like test it at home? I'm detecting rocks. Rocks, sand. Pebbles. Crystals. What's going on with you, Graham? Oh, just that same stuff.

It was going on. The only other thing was I couldn't sleep the last couple nights. So I've been like waking up and like just wide, like super wide awake. And so I've been watching, tucking into the new episodes of Black Mirror. Okay. All right. Yeah. Yeah.

Good. Good night spooks. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, they're not all spooky, but they're unsettling. I think I only saw the first season. That's all I saw. Yeah.

People are talking about this season, though. It's good. I've only seen the two. Let's give them something to talk about. That's the theme song. Yeah. And let's give Prime Minister Fox a big. It's the second episode has this guy the the guy in it i was like why do i instantly like this

actor so much like he's so he's so uh likable i was like why do i like this guy i looked it up it was uh it's a kurt russell's kid and i was like oh it's just like he's got the charm the charm yeah just uh uh segwayed into this guy is he goldie hans as well i guess so his name is wyatt russell i think i mean that they would name their kid wyatt yeah i think so yeah uh anyways he was really good and then the lady from jurassic world was in the first one she was really good oh r then the lady from Jurassic World was in the first one. She was really good. Oh, Ron Howard's a kid. Really? Bryce Dallas Howard? I didn't even put that together.

What's her name? Bryce Dallas Howard. Bryce Dallas? Yeah. Wow. That's good. So there's a whole. She's from, was she the lady in the water?

I don't know. The first time I've ever seen her was in Jurassic World. She had that crazy symmetrical haircut really geometric haircut and she wore heels even when she's getting chased by tyrannosaurus rex oh boy yeah hard you gotta suffer for fashion yeah jesus you don't tell me yeah yeah phil we should say that phil's wearing a shirt made out of cheese graters yeah hey guys it. It's a big day. Oh, I think you put it on inside out. Oh, Jesus. Slipping this thing on and off is painful.

Oh, lordy. Now, do we want to move on to a little bit of business? Yeah, we got a bit of a jumbo. Hey, guys. Jumbotron time. This one is a message from David B. for Heather A. And he says, Happy birthday, all caps.

Did I say that loud enough for all caps? Yeah. You said it like Frosty the Snowman. You probably could pass for Frosty. Thank you. In a lot of ways. Sore missed your 30th last year, ate all of the Halloween candy this year,

and continued to charge my Samsung Galaxy Note 7 on your nightstand. Those are legal on planes now. Can't even have them on a plane. You can have them. You just can't have them on. Oh, really? I thought you couldn't even have them on. They said, please turn it off.

Yeah. But Dave and Graham both agree that this more than makes up for all of that. We're great at reading. Have a wonderful day. Love you. P.S. Is this the thing half price if it's in a John Doerr episode? No.

Well, it's not in a John Doerr episode. So, no. But, you know, a very happy birthday to Heather A. From David B. What do you think? Why do you think he missed the birthday last year? What's that all about? He's probably eating.

He's probably so excited to eat this year's Halloween candy. Well, yeah. New candy. What if they rolled out new candies every year? Like, what do you mean? Just like a new candy that you'd never heard of. Like, not even just like a new kind of Mars bar. Oh, well, yeah, like a grape like candy that you'd never heard of like not even just like a new kind of mars bar oh well yeah like a grape mars bar i mean it's only available during would it have would it be

grape jelly yeah okay not just like uh no it would be like a mars bar the chocolate wouldn't be grape it wouldn't be purple chocolate no no but it could be one year. Yeah, okay. I'm in favor of this. Yeah, yeah. Candy companies, take note. Let's listen to some ads and then do a... Hi, everybody. I'm Justin McElroy. And I'm Dr. Sydney McElroy.

Every week, we release a medical history podcast called Sawbones. We go over the history of the dumbest, grossest, weirdest stuff humans have been doing to each other since the dawn of mankind. But it's a funny show. But it's also so disgusting and stomach-turning, you won't believe it. But it's also, like, funny. It's funny. It is the wildest, grossest, nastiest stuff you can imagine. It's a real hoot. It's called Sawbones and we release it every week on iTunes, wherever podcasts are sold,

and right here on MaximumFun.org. The first ever Chicago Podcast Festival is just around the corner. Don't miss your shot to catch MaxFun's own Bullseye,

Lady to Lady, and Minority Corner performing live for your entertainment. Split Single was just added to the Bullseye lineup in addition to the previously announced

and amazing Dwayne Kennedy and Andre Royo. Bullseye and Lady to Lady are November 17th and Minority Corner is November 18th. Visit MaximumFun.org and peep the live shows column on the right side to grab your tickets right now before time runs out. Overheard. Overheard. Overheards. A segment in which

we hear things out there in the world and then we share them here on the podcast. Phil's just realizing that this is the segment that we do now. Oh my goodness. I keep track of these. Okay, okay. I'm so bad at organizing it. I hope I have one. Yeah, yeah. Don't worry about it okay. I'm so bad at organizing it. I hope I have one. Yeah, yeah.

Don't worry about it. Otherwise, I'm trying to think of an overheard. Well, we can start. We can start with Dave. While you look for an overheard and try to find the microphone. Okay. Yeah, there it is. Okay, mine is actually an overseen, and it's something you and I both witnessed.

Oh, yeah. Do you know this is what I'm going to do? Oh, yeah. So, we were on the ferry coming back from Victoria, British Columbia this weekend. So nice to meet everybody. Oh, yeah. I like doing these small town shows because we get recognized on the street. Yeah, yeah.

Really? That's great. We stand out enough. Yeah, I got recognized peeing against a dumpster. Yeah. Well, mostly because we don't get a hotel, so we sleep in the street. Yeah, somebody recognized me washing myself in some pond water. We were on the ferry, and we were sitting right next to the cafeteria.

the cafeteria and, uh, they out outside the cafeteria, there's a hand sanitizer machine where I guess you put your hand underneath and it automatically sprays. Yeah. Yeah. It's good. Or it gives you a little, a little soapy,

you know, kind of like on a ice cream cone. Like, Oh, Oh yeah. A little twist. Yeah. Like half vanilla,

half hand sanitizer. Um, and, uh, this this little i don't know 10 year old kid goes up to it puts his hand in nothing comes out keeps trying to figure out yeah different angles looks underneath it puts his hand in pushes it like it's it's it he no longer i guess it was out of hand sanitizer he no longer accepts that you're not supposed to touch it so it's it's it he no longer i guess it was out of hand he no longer accepts that you're not supposed to touch it so he's touching it in all these different places then i think he just puts his finger right up underneath the bottom of it and like like pulls a little bit off the nozzle and then puts it in his mouth it's a tasty treat yeah and very sanitary yeah what do you would he have done with a full handful he would have had a full snack yeah would have ruined his dinner i mean i didn't grow up

with hand sanitizer it's a relatively new thing that people use yeah and phil's uh yeah you're a big fan um you're yeah you're you're writing the Purell movie. Yes. Well, it's a biopic, but yeah, Purell plays a top role. Now, do you have a brand loyalty when it comes to these? Because I know Purell's probably like king of sanitizers. Yeah, I think Purell's the best because sometimes I'll buy like whatever, like the cheaper. Store brand.

Yeah, and sometimes it's a little sticky afterwards ah that's gross that's what's the point yeah and then now some of them has have those little like they'd be like little blue dots oh yeah and i don't know what happens to those they just like dissipate when they what's the blue what's the blue dot i don't know it's not like it's they're not like microbeet exfoliating microbeads that end up in the water. What are they to let you know that your hands are sanitized? They might be like pop rocks. Oh, fun.

Yeah, a little bit of effervescence. Yeah, make your hand feel a little tingly. But I was going to say, I didn't grow up with these things. And as a kid, it would have blown my mind that you put this in your hand, you rub it, and it just disappears. Well, and also, when you're a kid, anything that's have blown my mind that you put this in your hand, you rub it, and it just disappears. Well, and also, when you're a kid, anything that's like where it's just free, then you just take, you go crazy with it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Like, I remember like going to the YMCA and they had like free aftershave.

Just dump that all over yourself. Yeah. I remember one year for Christmas, maybe in my in my stocking I got like a pack of Batman band-aids and I just put them You were going to say Batman after faith. And I just put them

all on like on Christmas day. Yeah. Walking around with a bunch of band-aids. I'm so excited. Santa was so disappointed in me.

What's your overheard there, Graham? Mine is So we're recording this This is the run up to Halloween Oh, run up to Halloween This will be released the day before the election I know

So, you know what? Make some predictions Get out there Vote for your governator And this also has This overheard has a political bent Because there was a guy I was at Value village uh-huh

and uh he was on the phone i guess with either his whoever he was partnering up with for halloween okay and he's like okay i've uh i've got everything and uh he was holding a bunch of stuff in it and he was listing off what he had he's's like, I got the jacket, I got the shirt, I got the pants. Now all I need to do is find a solid red tie and a Donald Trump wig. So I was like, oh, the two things that make it a Donald Trump costume? You found a suit and you're missing the two elements where you go, oh, yeah, that's a Trump. Do you think he was really proud of himself

when he was like, oh man, I'll be Donald Trump this year. It's happening. No one else will be doing it. I got it. I would like to go to a party where everybody dresses up as Donald Trump, but everybody thought they were going to be the only Donald Trump.

That's going to be a lot of parties. Yeah, I think that is going to be a lot of parties. A lot of parties. Yeah, I think that is going to be a lot of parties. And isn't, there's like something that like his costumes are outselling Hillary costumes at like some kind of insane rate, like 100 to 1 or something. You know he's proud of that. Oh, I'm sure. That statistic.

I mean, he hasn't bragged about it on Twitter, but that's only because people have been like, don't, don't brag about that. But I'm sure he won't begged about it On Twitter But that's only Because people have been Like don't Don't brag about that But I'm sure He won't be able To resist that for long Yeah Number one Halloween Cut

Thank you America Yeah But he'll win right Huh He's gonna win Halloween for sure He's gonna win Halloween Well I mean that

If you win Halloween You win the election Traditionally There's never been A president elected That hasn't won Halloween Yeah You win Halloween You win the election win Halloween, you win the election.

And if you save the cheerleader. You save the world. That's right. Did you find an overheard? I mean, I, to prepare for. How crazy this is going to be. No, to prepare for this. You hear, I hear so many overheards.

Yeah. More than most people. hear so many overheards yeah uh more than most people and i always record them in my phone and i just realize i'm just like scrolling through my phone and it just says new recording like 806 so i think i often record them and then don't label them so i just scrolled through like 500 but i honestly on my phone i do i'm like really the, oh, I listen to them and then I try to reenact the voices. Oh, really? I put a lot of effort into it. But anyways, I couldn't find the one I was looking for.

But when you guys were talking about the ferry, this did happen last time. It wasn't like, I remember at one point I was on the road with someone who I was not happy to be on the road for. I was opening for them. And I was like, just like, oh man, this weekend is going to be such a bummer. And we're on the ferry. We're going to Victoria. And over the announcements, I'm like, I go to the,

is it White Spot on the Rhode Island River? I'm lining up for the White Spot. And over the announcements, they're like, there is a pod of porpoises on the stern star side of the ship or whatever. And people start like filing out to see these like dolphins or whatever and i'm like getting my food that i'm not even happy that i have to eat this food i'm just like miserable it's just like death yeah yeah so everyone files out so i get my food all of a sudden i'm like the front of the line and i think like oh these guys are

suckers man so i get in i pay for my food i put it down on the table and i start uh i start walking out to see the dolphins or whatever and it just to me it felt like such a simpson moment they i guess i'd missed them because now everyone's like filing in as i'm getting out and i hear it and i just think i hear a guy it's like one of the first times i was on the ferry i didn't know i hear a guy go 25 years never seen that before and i'm like ah jesus christ i go back my burger's cold oh no yeah but uh yes i didn't get to see because i guess that's a real rare occurrence i've never seen i've never seen anything never not even a seal it was a pod whole pod whole pod yeah wow i mean you know what if they announced it i would have went out to see it? Would you have not lined up for your food?

Yeah, I would have just, no, I wouldn't. I would have stayed inside. Yeah. Tortoises. Yeah. Tortoises. Tortoises, yeah. Or a tortoise on a jet ski.

Oh, boy. No, I've seen whales. Really? I would love to see that. I've heard them announce whales, and I've just been too lazy to get out. Yeah. Unless they're really close, they just look like maybe it's a log in the water or something. You know what I mean?

No, I think porpoises, they build their tricks. Oh, really? I think they jump in the wake. Wow. Yeah. That's fun. I hear. Yeah.

25 years. 25 more years. But you don't know how often that guy rode the ferry. Once in 25 years. I feel like he implied it was like frequent. Yeah, he was wearing a captain's hat. Yeah, he was wearing a hat. Now, we also have overheards sent in to us from people around the globe.

If you want to send one into us, you can send it into SPY at maximum fun.org. Uh, this first one is from Eric from Boston. Uh, I was walking across a, uh, college campus behind a group of construction workers while a stereotypically

dressed professor was approaching us from across the quad. Quad, real university. Oh, really? Oh, just some school in Boston, eh? Remarking on his attire, one of the construction workers said, Look at this guy, so smug in his sweater vest, what a tool. A few seconds later, when we were passing him, he greeted the construction workers by saying, Good morning, gentlemen, to which they replied good morning sir as he was getting out of earshot that first construction worker said god i fucking hate that guy i hate everything about him right down to his mother's

birth canal then there was a long pause and there aren't a lot of birth canals i don't like oh pretty good yeah pretty good pretty deep. Pretty deep-seated resentment for that guy. But really, what's this fucking Frasier guy doing walking around? Good morning, gentlemen. Yeah, who says that? Hammer any nails today? He can bond with anyone. Yeah, that's true.

But that's life of the construction worker at a university campus there's no whistling no whistling no you're just you're just constructioning and yeah conversing with the professors and oh yeah it's a real uh when the when the schools close down for the night solving math problems solving math problems on the board not letting anybody but the board's got all this drywall all over it well it was definitely one of those construction guys i majored in enjoying apples um this next one comes from uh possibly longest time listener uh abby's aunt sheila Oh. This is walking past a tall hedge. I heard a man in a backyard say to an unknown person, very aggressively, are you fucked in the head?

This melon is fucking delicious. Yeah. Whoa. Yeah, I know. Maybe he's eating a guy's brain. Yeah. I thought it was a melon. Yeah.

I mean, or did, did you know maybe somebody said this melon isn't good yeah this melon is not good yeah maybe this guy said this melon is not good and i'm mentally ill oh are you yeah this melon is good what uh what are your what what melons are there are they just the three cantaloupe honeydew and waterdew And water I think there's got to be another one There's different types of watermelon Oh cassava Oh god I don't know that

Cassava Cassava is just one that I always hear about They put it in hair products and stuff Oh rather than shampoo Yeah Cassava melon I don't think I've ever There's definitely some melons that i don't know

what they're called that are for sale up in the the kind of little india part of town there's these weird i don't know i can't i can't figure out what they are yeah but like some kind of yeah what about yellow watermelon that's crazy delicious yeah? Delicious. Yeah. I'm excited just thinking about it. Have you seen it? I've had it once. It's exciting. Have you ever had this was a thing that I tried not this summer, last summer, grilled watermelon?

No. That loses a lot of water though. Oh yeah, you gotta grill it fast. But it's... So it's... Do they put anything on it? No, they just throw it on the grill And they finish it off with a little bit of salt on it Really? Oh buddy

Was it delicious? Oh my god Watermelon's one of my favorite things Grilled watermelon with a little bit of You know sea salt? Yeah Okay I've got

There's a list of melons This is like the Hanukkah song Yeah The canary melon Okay Never heard of it Looks like all the others Sure

Cantaloupe Yeah Number one with a bullet You guys like cantaloupe Yeah It's my fave Oh is it really I think watermelon

Is my number one Yeah Watermelon's two Cassava Yeah Cassava Crenshaw Oh yeah

Get a crenshaw melon Yeah Call it a night Charentaise Christmas melon Oh yeah Cr a crunch on melon Call it a night Charantes Christmas melon Oh yeah crack one open What is it meat? It's next to the Christmas goose

I'm gonna carve the Christmas melon Darishi Gahlia Honeydew we're going alphabetically Horned melon I've seen these Is that like a star fruit? It looks like a

Meh It's a yellow Oh I've seen those It looks like a puffer fish That's what I That's what I'm talking about Up in Little India They got those

Also known as a Kiwano That's why I know it There's a melon pear That's a Some kind of melon Musk melon Net melon

Starting Sanctuary Ogan melon Pepino melon Persian melon Russian Slash Uzbek melon starting Santa Pollock uh ogan melon pepino melon Persian melon Russian slash

Uzbek melon okay probably just Uzbek yeah stolen by the

Russians uh Santa Claus melon that's gotta be the same as the Christmas

melon charlin melon seedless watermelon sweet melon tree

melon also known as a papaya oh papaya's melon papaya tastes like garbage to me it really does doesn't it taste like trash mealy it's it's yeah smells it's just off and it's weird being one that people are very because i quite like it oh really i could see

the garbage flavor it being that like um what's that thing that everybody, some people love it, some people think it tastes like soap. Cilantro? Cilantro. Yeah. I like cilantro. I like cilantro too. They put it in Hoegaarden.

What's a beer? Hoegaarden, that white, yeah, beer. Ah. Yeah, I saw a show about it. I try to work it into every conversation. Guys, five more melons. Five more melons. Oh, God.

Watermelon. Wax melon. Winter melon. Yeah. Yellow watermelon And Xihua Ah there we go Which must be a

Chinese melon It's weird that Most of them Have just a pot of seeds Right in the middle Watermelon's like Put seeds everywhere Everywhere yeah

Well Watermelon gets it done That would be a good bit What's the deal with this? I guess It just evolved differently. This last overheard comes from Danielle A. in Dallas, Texas. My three-year-old daughter likes to practice floating, blowing bubbles, and swimming while in the bathtub.

Yesterday during her bath, she kept trying to put her head underwater, so I tried to explain to and show her how she could do it. After a number of failed attempts. She turns to me and sighs and says. Mama. I can't put my head underwater. I'm just a little kid. With little boobs. Adorable right?

Yeah. If you had big boobs. It would help you put your head underwater. Yeah. I don't know how the mother was showing. That's why David Blaine's so good. Yeah. He's our largest chested comedian.

Magician. Does he still do stuff? Yeah, sure. I haven't seen him. I mean, do stuff is relative. He stays perfectly still. But I remember he was quite active in the keeping still. Yeah, yeah. But I think there's only so many, like, where is he going to active in the keeping still. Yeah, yeah.

But I think there's only so many like where is he going to keep still next? Yeah. Outer space. Once that becomes a possibility.

Yeah. Yeah. Keep still outer space. Play golf, keep still, all those things you can do on the moon. In addition to

overheards that are written and we also accept your phone calls. If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-SPY-POD1. That's 1-UGH-SPYPOD1, like these people have. Hi, this is Mitch calling from Calgary with an overheard. I was at the mall the other day riding down an escalator behind a mom with her approximately 16-year-old son.

And he was pleading with her to let him drive home from the mall. But the mom wasn't having that. And she was saying how she was worried that it's a very busy parking lot, not much room to navigate out of the stall. It can be really tricky. To which the son enthusiastically responded, But mom, I'm the king of pulling out. That's not what i heard uh yeah because that's a regional thing you know the different kings of different

fiefdoms oh sure i think yeah yeah you gotta do an obstacle course yeah there's not just one king of pulling out no yeah there's a new the whole hierarchy yeah yeah there's one king of pulling out. No. Yeah. There's the whole hierarchy, right? Yeah. Yeah. There's dukes of pulling out. The jack. Fun. That's something. Learning to drive, I never would have volunteered for it. Let me get out of the mall parking lot. I still, I'm a really bad, I drive like twice a year.

Yeah. And the first 10 minutes is like. It's really intense. Dangerous. Very dangerous. Yeah. Yeah. I drive about twice a year Yeah And the first 10 minutes Is like It's pretty intense Dangerous Very dangerous Yeah Yeah I drive about the same

Like once Twice a year Isn't that crazy When you Like the first 10 minutes Like pulling out of the car Right to the lot I'm like there's no way

They're gonna take the keys back Yeah There's no way I can do this And the last time that I drove No not the last time The time before I was driving a stick Oh

And that had been a long time since I had driven one of those. Yeah. And in the states, at rental car lots, they don't have them here, I don't think, but they have the severe tire damage spikes. Yes, all right. If you go the wrong direction. Yeah. How often does this happen?

Yeah, it's crazy. And even when you feel like you're going the right direction, they're still like really gruesome looking. They're like these like fangs that come out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also, because, so I rent a car at an airport and then you're immediately just in the busiest, craziest highway ever, just like circling the airport.

So it's always so crazy. And I'm like adjusting the mirrors and- Yeah, yeah. Trying to find the 80s on eight on SiriusXM. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Its on eight on serious except yeah yeah yeah it's on eight here is your next phone call hey dave graham and brilliant hilarious guest this is matt calling from nyack new york with an overheard uh this comes via a friend of mine back in march who heard somebody out on the sidewalk say why the hell did he get a vasectomy right

before St. Patrick's Day? This ties in well with the king of pulling out. Yeah, because St. Patrick's Day is if you're going to knock somebody up. Yep. That's the day to go and get lucky. Yeah. Because then when does the baby arrive? I guess right at year's end, basically.

Just before the fiscal year. Oh, is that right? Yeah. The fiscal year. Although our baby is due in early January. Uh-huh. And we met a mother whose baby was born on, I can't remember if it was December 31st or January 1st.

And she's like, oh, oh yeah you guys are going through the same thing like i mean obviously if your baby's born this year it's a write-off like for taxes oh really yeah yeah wow what a romantic way to look at you could get you know there's that whole malcolm gladwell of like you know uh the kids born in january better hockey player better hockey players ah there hockey players. Ah. Mm-hmm. There you go. Or they're the tallest in their class.

Sure. My kid's not going to be the tallest in anything. Well, you don't know. You don't know. Tell him to watch himself down here in the basement. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Phil.

Phil knocked his noodle on the. Yeah, went full tilt boogie right into the. I was. Hit my head. Here's your final overheard. Hey, guys and guests. This is Brandy. I'm calling from Baltimore.

I have an overheard. It was my six-year-old stepson. We were out to dinner with my mom, and she asked him if he had any girlfriends in school. He's in first grade now. And he said, well, I used to have one, but not anymore. And she asked, well, what happened? And he said, well, I used to have one, but not anymore. And she asked, well, what happened? And he said, well, we just canceled the love. Canceled the love.

Oh, that's right up there with conscious uncoupling. Yeah. We canceled our love. We canceled our love. We went through the records. We canceled Netflix so we couldn't watch love. uh you know we canceled netflix so we couldn't watch love this quarter wasn't as strong as last quarter so we just canceled the whole thing i mean our love it was strong but not in the right demographic that's right and you know what

in that key demo the two of us that would be a fun way not a i mean breaking up with somebody's never fun but presenting it as a pie chart as a series of charts you should like your show getting canceled yeah like i've done the math and you know we're not and here's we're gonna divvy up the friends this is who i'm getting this is who you're getting and uh abby and i uh on our anniversary every year we renew the lease yeah you got well you gotta renew the lease and uh and the terms right you know the terms yeah we're gonna renegotiate yeah yeah yeah you get to don't lock into terms until you're sure that you've got the advantage oh boy that's that the upper hand that i imagine is a tough conversation couples some couples must do that what like okay this year I'm allowed to do this and you're allowed to do that?

You were bad last year, so I get more power now. I like it. Yeah. Keeps everybody honest. Keeps everybody working towards the goal, you know? Now, that brings us to the end of this episode. Phil. Yes.

What do you got to plug? This comes out. November 7th. Yeah. Guys, get out there and vote Rock the vote Yeah rock the vote Voter die

Voter suppression Really if you're just Even if you don't want to vote For either the main candidate Just get out there Numbers Need Every

Just Democracy needs numbers Yeah if enough people vote We get a free sub Yeah That This week So the 7th

That weekend I'm at the Comedy Nest in Montreal. Okay. Yeah, which is a fun weekend. Yeah. And so you won't be in America during the drama. Well, I'll be there for that. Yeah, I'll be there for the drama and then I fly. Oh, and then you fly.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. So on the 10th, 11th, and 12th. Yeah, and people in Montreal, if you haven't seen Phil live, you really should do yourself the favor. Go out there and check him out. Yeah, please come out to my shows. You know, don't go to two shows, though,

because then it will really ruin the crowd work illusion. Yeah. Yeah. And this movie, you don't know when it'll be available to the general public? No, but it'll be, yeah's worth submitting to festivals, and then I guess after that, it'll be like released. And it's called Sundowners? Sundowners, yeah. And you're the headline star? You're the big name?

I'm not the big name, but I have the most lines, yeah. Oh, cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I'm like the, yeah, I was like, I'm the main character. Is there, who's the famous famous Is there a famous in it Tim Heidecker Tim Heidecker plays my boss Nice

Nice That's cool Yeah it was really fun We shot in Columbia Wow South America yeah Oh that's amazing Yeah it was fun

Yeah well I cannot wait to see it You gotta get to these festivals You gotta go You know I very rarely I don't submit That's my problem. Oh, yeah.

I'll make you submit. What? We'll renegotiate. I have a thing to plug. No deal. Oh, what? On November 12th, I'm part of a show called Bite of the Underground, which is a fundraiser for a theater company. And I will be doing the Grahamham clark reads the phone book so

if you're somebody in vancouver who wanted to see that and now and we're like yeah no i'll get it on the second time around this is your chance to come see this it's uh i don't know where it's happening off the top of my head oh yeah it's a fundraiser for new world theater it'll be on my facebook page i'll post it to the spike. I want to see that show. I've never seen that show. This is it. It's your chance. Yeah.

Come fly in. Oh, another thing. Just announced another show we have next year. Yep. In March. I don't know the date. First weekend in March, I believe. We are in Banff.

Banff. Alberta. That's right. I think it's March the 4th. Be with you. Yeah. We'll be in Banff at the something something center. The one place in Banff.

Center for Excellence. And if you like the show, head over to MaximumFun.org. Check out the blog recap. Pictures and videos of all the things we talked about Including What did we talk about? Maybe a time lapse Sabers Someone changing into a basketball court

Liberace Time lapse of Liberace Of his career Him putting his jewelry on I would watch that Yeah all that sparkly Stuff like that Other things I would watch that. Yeah, all that sparkly. And, you know, stuff like that.

Other things. And if you like the show, you can leave a review on iTunes. That always helps. And tell your friends. Please tell your friends. And come on back next week for another episode

of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Kisses to yourself.