Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 486 - Alex Nussbaum

Episode Date: July 10, 2017

Comedian Alex Nussbaum joins us to talk natural talent, good deeds, and New York City.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 486 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name's Graham Clark and with me as always is a man. With a plan. With a tan.

With. Bran. Mr. Dave Shumka. I mean you're half right. Yeah. Bran. Yes. And I'm a man.

Yeah. I don't have a plan or tan no and but are you still sticking with the no sunscreen so it hasn't been a problem since we last talked about it it's been no sun but but the skin is uh peeling off nicely oh good yeah well i like that you're sticking to your guns um our guest today, first-time guest on the podcast, very funny comedian who has several albums out that you can get on iTunes or on a Google Play or anywhere where you listen to albums. The corner store where you put on the headset and you pick an album from the little display. He's on that. Jukebox. He's on a couple of jukeboxes

I don't know where And he has a new podcast Coming out this fall Called Brave New Warrior It's Mr. Alex Nussbaum is our guest Hi guys Thanks for having me You said several

Several usually refers to four, five, maybe six I have two albums A couple A few weeks ago I asked my wife You know, I'd like to, it's several usually refers to four or five, maybe six. I have two albums. Two? Yeah. Okay. Couple. Sure.

I, a few weeks ago, I asked my wife to bring home a couple of limes from the store and she brought home two limes. And I was like, no, not a couple. Yeah. A couple. I know a couple can be three. It's, you know, a couple kind of sometimes bleeds into a few. That's true. Yeah.

But you know. It depends on how you inflect it's like aloha so does it go couple few several i think so yeah oh boy but in the middle there's a handful oh yeah right yeah this guy's got a handful of albums give me a handful of cheerios i mean that's like a literal measurement yeah but what what situation I don't know. And actually, to be honest, like one album is a handful on its own. But also,

now that they're digital, infinite albums can fit in the palm of your hand. You've got these little tiny computers that we walk around with. That's true. Yeah, what a time

to be alive. Should we get to know us? Sure. Get to know us. Alex, you're visiting Vancouver from Los Angeles Yeah And we were talking But you're from Canada

Toronto Okay okay okay Born and raised Yeah And then you were like See you later Stinktown I think that's what you said

That was the headline in the paper When you left Nussbaum Nussbaum says S- right see you later stinktown a couple years later uh looking for a gig stinktown hey stinktown uh sorry about that whole stinktown thing um we were talking very briefly because you went to los angeles you in toronto you were not a person that had a car right and then la car time we bring this up every time these are the topics really so what is this why is this a thing what are our topics if you if you move to toronto we always talk about uh how you like that how you like that if you move to la we're like i was having a car yeah if you're

from calgary what high school did you go yeah yeah uh and if you're from Calgary, what high school did you go to? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And if you're from Winnipeg, ooh, cold. Cold there. So what's the car situation? What's the car situation? Well, I have one now, but actually I spent a year not having a car there just to see how long I could go without one. Did you write a blog or something like that? Not at all.

Not a bad idea, though. Yeah, it's not a bad idea. A year in LA without a car. like that not at all not a bad idea though i feel like that could be turned into a maybe not a netflix series but maybe like some streaming service you hadn't you hadn't quite heard of like a yeah like a like one rung below cso or something yeah like like maple leaf foods has their own streaming service and you're like uh, it's mostly meat-related content. And Alex Nussbaum's Gear Without a Car in L.A. show. It's somehow completely unrelated.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I want to tune in, because why would they pick this series up? But, you know, we were talking about how you don't need to know anything about a car until you decide to buy one. Yeah. And then you learned a lot. That's exactly it. I became, I was in no way a car guy. In fact, I got my license at the age of 31 years old.

Ooh. But you don't look at it a day over 29. No, no, no. I'm talking about that was a while ago. Well, then what time am I in? Oh, yeah. a while ago. Well, then what time am I in? Oh yeah, Dave, I forgot that we're doing this podcast on a fault line of the space-time continuum.

Yeah. So Dave's five years ago? Yeah, five years. Sorry, yeah. I live my life through when Facebook reminds you of something that used to happen. So tell me about this car. Well, first I want to tell you about the fact that I took Lyfts and Ubers for the year.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I kind of, well, I mean, it's sort of like, it actually ends up being more social, right? Because I lived in LA before and I had a car back then. And, you know, a typical thing is that you're alone in your car. You know, everybody's alone in their car driving around, right? So you don't have the same experience as you would being on public transportation as I was used to in Toronto. Yeah.

You know, but at least with, you know, like Uber or Lyft. I took Lyft, you know, because that's the hippie one and I like that. What makes it the hippie one versus, I literally have no idea. Yeah, it just seems to be, well, the business practices, I was talking to the people who drove them and they tended to prefer the way they were treated by Lyft. But it wasn't like the vehicles were more hippie-ish. Can you be both? No, but in a way it was. Can a driver be both?

Can you have like, you can slap a mustache on your car? They do that, yeah. Okay. Well, yeah, that whole mustache thing, that's kind of... Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was really... They were really making it difficult for people to be Lyft drivers. When it was first like an actual mustache on the front bumper. Yeah.

A big pink mustache. Big pink mustache. Like, why do they have to make it... Yeah. Because now it's just a little light in the car. Oh, yeah, it's shaped like a mustache. That's right. Yes, that's it.

But... I guess it's sort of before these things existed, the only other example was a thing on top of a taxi. Right. Yeah. But again, pink mustache. Yeah, like that's a few steps away from generic triangle light. Well, wasn't it playing on like...

Right. Wasn't it playing on a mustache ride wasn't that the oh maybe that's what i because it was i don't know why it originated in san francisco did it not uh i'd say i don't yeah i think most everything does of course it's yes yes rice rice was the first rice sharing program right pretty good um uh because there's more of them down in the states these cars yeah like yeah i mean you can't get lift in uh i don't know which if there are any canadian cities that have we don't have uber here i know yeah but they have uber lift and then there's other ones in like new york there's one like called cory and there's like there's one that's run by maple leaf food yeah yeah where you just get picked up in oscar meyer

wienermobile yeah um but yeah like uh so did you like being in these uh yeah it was all right you know you can make conversation did you learn anything like oh that's where so-and-so was you know murdered murdered or whatever. Oh, like it was like some kind of a tour guide. Yeah. A tour bus. No, I didn't. No, I think I was teaching them more than they were.

Yeah. I felt that way too when the few times I've taken them. Like when we were in Chicago. Where you were like, what is that thing? I don't know. Yeah. The only time was like a driver to the airport he uh he gave me some tips as to what uh what to do at the airport to get there and like i don't know like

tricks because he's just oh i've been a driver for you know 25 years or whatever and you know yeah so he's like the only guy who drove lift that actually had experience right yeah and then you were like this is enough is enough time to. Well, yeah, you know, I just, I was also borrowing friends, you know, like a friend needed a parking spot because the parking was terrible in the neighborhood. So I'd be like, yeah, you could use my spot. I had a spot, I had a parking spot for a year and I didn't have a car. You could use my spot and I'll use your car. How about that? And so I occasionally had borrowed a car.

Yeah. And then eventually I was like, okay, well, I need to be able to actually use a car whenever I want to. So I bought a car. Yeah. Yeah. And like, are you way into cars now? Yeah. Are you my car guy?

More so. More so. Yeah. I'm looking now at different cars because I was sort of hemming and hawing about what car I wanted to get for so long that I. Hemming and hawing. Yeah. Thank you. Car terms.

Yeah. Yeah. So let's see. What do I have to do to get you in a car terms. Yeah. So, let's see. What do I have to do to get you in a car today? Yeah. What do you like in a car? What did you look for? What features do you like in a car?

Can I guess? Can I guess the car you got? Yeah, I like this game. Honda Civic. I had that first time I was in LA. Wow. How many cars have you owned? That would have been

the first one. Okay. And then this is number two? Yeah. Okay. So, you've tried the Civic. You've decided

I need something a little more upscale. Toyota Corolla. That's good. First of all, I did not get enough credit for guessing Honda Civic. I think it's amazing that you guessed Honda Civic. No, but that's good that's first of all that's a lateral i did not get enough credit for guessing honda civic i think it's amazing that you guessed on that's a good well yeah but you know that's like that's a that's a classic that's like the people that's like saying let me guess what

poster you had on your dorm room wall bob marley um generic yes i i uh i got the generic car it was it was good it was convenient and it worked and all that sort of yeah yeah i enjoyed there's a reason there's a reason there's so many of them yeah yeah and what so what did you end up well you know because i feel like if i tell you then it's gonna be all kinds of judgment no no no oh it's a bad car no no no no but it's a really good car asshole car yeah a little maybe is it a big car no or a really good car. Asshole car. Yeah, maybe. Is it a big car? No. Or a fast car? Small car.

Small car, fast car? Yeah, a little bit faster. Is it a Mini Cooper? No. Do you want to guess, or should I tell you? Yeah, yeah, we want to guess. Guessing is... Small, fast.

This doesn't give you any hints, but just for myself, just to let you know, I did do, like, I researched a lot, and this car, in fact, was very good for, like, performance and reliability, and, like, it was... Oh, it's a Mazda Speed 3. No, it's close. I was looking at those. I researched a lot. And this car, in fact, was very good for, like, performance and reliability. And, like, it was. Oh, it's a Mazda Speed 3. No, it's close. I was looking at those. I was looking at the Mazda 3. Mmm, a Lotus.

Getting warmer. Oh, Dave, you're good at this game. Because I don't know it anyway. All right, I'm done guessing. It's a 228. What is the brand? It's a BMW. Oh.

It's a small, it's like an entry level. It's like their bottom, like there's every, uh, luxury brand has like this bottom entry level. Like it, like essentially. I had no idea Dr. Nussbaum. Right, right. Well, this is the thing. These are all things that I discovered without having any intention to. I really wasn't this kind of guy until I went,

I started becoming obsessed about just getting kind of the best thing that I want, that I could, that was within the range of what I wanted. Like, right. Essentially, if I got like a upper scale Honda Civic, it would cost the same as this.

So it's not like I paid, like, it's not like a really expensive car. It's more than just, but you do have to explain it every time. Every time. Every time. I'm actually not,

I'm not this guy. Yeah. I'm not that guy. I'm not that guy. Well, we have car to go in Vancouver. Yes. And they have, it's all.

Mercedes CLA 250s. They have two kinds of Mercedes. This is what I know. But they all, like it's 99%, it's smart cars. Right.

They run in smart cars. Yes. Which are great if you like to crouch. Yeah. I was like, my shoulders were all hunched today. But they have. I took one here.

I don't mind them. It's kind of has that go-kart feel. I like it. Yeah, no, they do have a go-kart feel. And they do. The fact that you don't have to have any accountability for them, like you can just slam on the brakes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I only slam on either pedal on them. Like, you can just, like, slam on the brakes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I only slam on either pedal on them. You can do, like, a not great parking job and just walk away. The fancy Mercedes ones they have, I don't think they have any of the actual Mercedes features. I think they're just, like. Well, that's it. That's the, I mentioned the model number because I know the, uh, all the entry level ones.

Cause I was looking at the, right. Yeah. Because you said the other night, that's why I was like, Oh, this guy really is a, this guy knows something about cars.

Cause once you're into like, I know the letters and numbers and stuff. I was never that guy until about half a year ago. Yeah. And then I became weirdly, and I didn't necessarily like the transfer. I didn't like what the transfer i didn't like what i was looking at right here this transformation yeah no it's it's uh are you

have you ever been that way with other things have you been like like i was that way with guitars right right um where you wanted to buy the top of the line no no just like i would you know i would know brands oh where you would like nerdy about it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if I, and I don't think I would have been. It just, it was more just a matter of, when I moved to LA, I was in Toronto, kind of stuck there doing like, almost like subletting for a while. So I started becoming obsessed with everything I got now that I have my place again.

And I'm like, you know, I'm setting myself up. I want everything to be kind of the best thing I can get under the circumstances right so then that made me kind of weirdly upset and then I started going down this you know rabbit hole ah damn it now I'm this guy um but like you were like I want this coffee table but I spent a little bit more I can get that coffee table yeah and you should see my coffee yeah it sounds then you real good. You gotta get a really expensive coffee table booked for it. You gotta drink nice coffee. Yeah,

you're not gonna die. Those things doesn't It's true. It's true. It's snowballs. It is a weird thing. I was talking with a friend of the show,

Emmett Hall, and he was talking about I also consider him a personal friend. Yeah, a close personal friend. He was talking about Text me every year

on my birthday. That's nice. Yeah. You know know like uh do you ever get a thing from like dominoes or something on your birthday do they know your birthday no dominoes emails me every day as we've talked but uh he was saying like if you have one really nice thing yeah in your place then it tends to really stick out if everything else you have is kind of right that makes sense right yeah that makes sense so once you you move that past that threshold where you're like okay well i've got a really spectacular couch and you're like but then it's sitting right next to this garbagey table yeah then it just looks like you maybe like i don't know won it in a lottery or something oh

yeah like it doesn't one of your rich friends was getting rid of it yeah exactly well it's like they have those uh win a house lotteries but they'll also like you can win a car in one of these sub lotteries but it's always like a tesla yeah so if you're just like someone who i spent their last ten dollars on a lottery ticket and won a tesla like can i plug this into your house can i plug my car in yeah like calling your landlord and be like um they gave me this charge unit can i install it yeah where do i install do i install it inside my apartment? And just run an extension cord out the window. Yeah, that's one of the reasons. I was thinking, hey, an electric car might be nice if I didn't live in an apartment.

I mean, really, it's kind of a backward thing. I mean, how can you get the greater population engaged in this whole electric car thing if most of the people don't have an outlet to plug it into. Yeah. Yeah. It's a, I mean, whenever I see one,

I'm just like, that's like a big symbol of, cause then that means you've got a place to charge it. Yeah. And you kind of, you don't, you, you have a garage.

You don't just have a house. You have a garage. Yeah. What I was thinking about Tesla the other day because it was like a trivia question. Like this. Oh, no. It was in the crossword puzzle. A company named after an inventor.

And I was like, every company is named after an inventor. Yeah. Maple Leaf Foods. Yeah. Exactly. Fruitopia. Or they're named after their founder or whatever. Yeah.

But this was, it was Tesla because it's named after a different inventor and that's really weird and you couldn't do that with any other you couldn't just like pick uh yeah we're gonna call this steve jobs computers oh yeah yeah yeah was it can can is it does a name have like is it like sort of like a copyright where it only lasts so many years like has he been dead long enough that you could use his name as a... Yeah. So why can't I call my film studio Walt Disney? Yeah, or like,

just call the, yeah, whatever thing you invent, the Benjamin Franklin. Mm-hmm. Because I guess it's just a state at that point.

Really? Benjamin Franklin? Like the sex act? Yeah, what's that? Oh, yeah. Involved bifocals, first of all.

Yeah, sure. You tie a key to your dingle you wait for a very stormy night and uh if your erection lasts more than four hours you say what good will i do today is that his that him i know he was early to bed early to rise um so uh you did you get all the things? Because you were saying you were like subletting and now you're in a play. Yeah. I mean, I just sort of started getting obsessed about like, well, I got to get that. I don't want to get a bad thing and then have to replace it a year later and all that kind of thing.

It feels like in L.A. people wouldn't really judge you for your possessions. Yeah. I do this for me. Oh, right. Okay. It's for my own enjoyment and my own experience. That's why people move to LA. So, you know, they can just drive in a, in their

Bentley and no one will think anything about it. Yeah, right. Exactly. Just leave me alone with my luxury automobile. Yeah. But honestly, it's, you know, when you get something that is really well-made, it's fun to use.

Yeah. You know, I mean, I figured like I'll do this and then I'll go to like a nice electric car after. I'll do this for a couple of years, enjoy it, and then go to an electric car. Can I tell you something right now? What? You don't have to feel guilty about having a nice car.

You have judgment in your eyes. Of course. But you're projecting that. It's true enough. You're probably reflecting inward. Yeah. Yeah, I understand. Let me tell you right now and always, I'm only thinking about myself.

That's very comforting. Yeah. And so what else has been going on? Yeah, pretty much just working on... Just tuning up the Beamer. Yeah, pretty much. Just spending a lot of time making sure she's doing fine. I mean, she's not exactly street legal, but...

Yeah, actually, I got an email. They had like an autocross where you get to test on a track. One of their... Like a BMW 5 Series, whatever. Did they email you on your birthday? They always do.

And so, yeah, I said, fuck it, I'll do it. Did you do it? Yeah I drove it fast You get in a car With a An experienced driver Like a former

Retired race car driver And then they teach you How to kind of take Take the turns And all that Did they do this The whole time? Yeah yeah

Is it my mom? Yeah Uh Is it Uh Uh Like a Like a race course Or a Yeah it's a race course?

Yeah, it's a race course. It's a very short one. Asphalt? Not a dirt track or anything? Yeah, it's in a parking lot. They set it up in a parking lot. Oh, like they used to do when Jay Leno had that 10 o'clock show. Yeah.

Oh, boy, that was weird. Do you remember that? I didn't watch that. I never watched. So at the end of, was it the end of every episode? I mean, I watched every episode. Yeah, yeah. You were a completist.

Of course. But he would get in a car or he would race somebody. Maybe that was it? Or was he in the same car as the... And then they would sing karaoke, I think was the thing. But this was your car that you were racing or a different... No, they had like, they had their own, they had, you know, it was like the latest they're kind of, it's also promoting the latest model. And so you get in with it. Yeah.

And, and they'll, and they'll take, you know, they'll tell you, okay, slow, slow, slow, slow, fast, fast. And they'll also take the wheel if you're, it's a little reach over and grab the wheel to kind of help you turn. Cause you're not, you're not coming at it tight enough or something like that. Yeah. Wow. It was, uh, yeah, it was thrilling and, you know, a little bit demoralizing in a way because,

you know, make you feel like a kid who doesn't know how to drive. Did you assume that you would be good at it? Driving very fast? No,

not necessarily. Yeah, because I don't think I did. Yeah, in fact, I don't think I was very good. It was a constant, you know,

he's like, you know what, I'll just keep my hand on the wheel. I'm tired of reaching over every turn. i play you would play car video games yeah i would never hit the brakes i was yeah right like what's the point i'm i didn't come here to hit the brakes or like when you can upgrade your car and get good brakes like why would you do that you're pulling over to the side of the road and having a nap. I'm sleepy, and you're supposed to if you're sleepy. That's what you mean by good driving technique. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's for long trips. I've been driving this video game a long time. I'm really tired. Yeah, the... I was watching one of the Fast and the Furious films, which I have not watched. I watched maybe the first one when it first came out.

Right. So I watched the seventh one. Yeah. And. Is that the one with the car? Yeah, yeah, yeah. There is. They do all sorts of crazy things in cars.

Things that I'm pretty sure cars can't do. Right. Like talk. Yeah, talk and fly through one building into another building. With each film in the series, I would imagine they'd have to up. do right like talk yeah talk and fly through one building into another really with each with each yeah with with each film in the series i would imagine they'd have to up the ante in terms of like what a car can do because we already saw that last yeah last movie but there was a a scene where they're talking about because exactly that they were talking about a car that's supposed to

be like the ultimate car and like this prince in dubai has this car right and they start listing off you know numbers it does 240 this and that and i was like i don't know if i don't know if that's good or bad i have no idea like i mean it sounds fast i still don't know yeah i don't know but yeah i mean and then you see the car and you're like i don't know like i've seen i've seen car's not like, oh, it's got fins on it. Like all crazy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Like the submarine car from James Bond. Yeah. Maybe where it did have fins. Yeah. You mentioned Lotus. I think that was a Lotus. Yes, it was.

Yeah. And it had, why would it, just to balance it in the water, I guess? Why does anything have fins in the water? I don't know. I assume for balance. I think that makes sense. But yeah, like, but I feel like there's people that watch the Fast and the Furious and they know what all these numbers mean and they get really.

Is it 240? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Have anyone. Guys love numbers. Yeah. I mean, stats of all kinds, right? 240 yeah yeah yeah have anyone guys love numbers yeah I mean stats

of all kinds has anyone in those movies ever fucked a car uh okay well here's the weird thing about the one scene

is that uh they uh it's the last one that Paul Walker's in is the seven one yeah

he spilled some armor all right when he was sorry oh boy they go into this uh dubai's prince's place to get this car yeah and uh they're like we got to get the whatever microchip out of the thing and so vin diesel just lifts the car up so that paul walker can go underneath and work on it and the whole time that vin diesel's holding up the car it looks like he's having sex with the car so that's oh i think it was like the director knew what he was doing right and also to have like paul walker like underneath vin diesel while he's like grunting and sweating. It was like, it was like a DP like on the car.

Yeah. I think like, yeah. Jesus. Yeah. I think that's what it was like. So, but if it was just Vin Diesel,

that would have been like, that's fine. I mean, you know, at least just start with that. Maybe, maybe again, number eight,

then they can start. That would be weird if there was a scene where there was human and car sex in it, but it was like really kinky. Yeah. Like,

yeah, they jumped ahead. Yeah. Like advanced stuff. And also, we always think that it's always going to be the human

doing it to the car. We never think of the other way around. Right. We never think of the car being kind of in charge of everything. And really, with cars now, these smart cars. It's true.

I swear to God, the car made the first move. They parked themselves. Yeah. So now what? They have cameras. Yeah, they can predict when crashes are going to happen. I'm telling you, she backed that shit up. Oh, no. Oh shit up. Oh no.

Oh well. You know. But did you, like, I've never driven a car really fast. Right. Is what I realized

while I was watching Fast and the Furious and when you were talking about going on a race car track. Yeah. And I don't know. Well, the funny thing of it is,

is the race car track is that you don't really go that fast. There's so many turns. It's more about being able to handle the turns and all that. Right. My race car driver, you know, instructor was a woman and she said. What? I know, right?

Sorry, I know you were waiting for someone. Very progressive. I don't know why I said it. I just said she said, so I thought I'd tell her. But she kept saying, you know, slow is fast. That was the mantra. Was she saying it in like a Russian accent? It seems like a real like.

Slow is fast. Why would you be Russian? It just seems like a, you know, sort of an instructor-y thing. Yeah. Remember, slow is fast. Slow is fast. Yeah. Yeah, I can see it. some kind of wisdom from another yeah place

yeah yeah yeah so i was so she had to keep telling me that because i wanted to kind of gun it because i was thinking like i was thinking i gotta go i gotta go well yeah i want to win i mean i also i feel like i wouldn't want to get the best time. I'm probably not going to get the best time. I'd like to just, you know, go as fast as I can for a little while. But wouldn't you want to? That's why I went there. I was like, I want to drive the same way. I want to hit my, I want to floor it. I want to ruin your car.

Yeah. But I also, you know, I have that like ongoing, I think everybody has the fantasy about this, that they try something for the first time. Oh, yeah. And they're the best at it in the world. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And I'd have that for sure.

Absolutely. There are times where I do have kind of like a rookie, what do you call that again? It's like a thing. A bit like beginner's luck? Yeah, sort of. But it's, yeah, I think there's a- Rookie blue? Is that what you're going to say?

That's it. Oh, Lord. What, are you going to ask me like what I had? No, or something that like, that you've always hoped that if you tried it, that you haven't tried, but if you tried it, that you were like, I would really like to be just automatically excellent. Yeah, that's a good question.

I think everything, you know, music, fighting, whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like everything that you try, you're just like nailed. The problem with fighting is everyone, the only time you really practice it is when you're doing it i once took one aikido class i don't know why it was only one like it wasn't a series you got a coupon for your birthday exactly and and and uh and we were all sort of supposed to do the stance of like holding the the the sword thing right the wooden sword thing and And he'd go around and correct it.

And he looked and he didn't correct it. And he says, have you done this before? I said, I have not. Oh, wow. So that was the one time I did feel, when it relates to fighting, that I have a certain natural affinity. Yeah. I always thought that I would be really good, like, anything like shooting

or like a bow and arrow. I've done both of them, and I stunk at both. It was just so terrible. That happened to me too. In high school we did archery and I, and I was like hitting the bullseyes and stuff like that. Really? Yeah.

And I'm uncoordinated with everything. So, but I think when it comes to, as long as there's not a lot of movement. Like as long as you just can just stand there and just kind of move just your fingers. One thing, yeah. If I can focus on one thing and it doesn't require a lot of strength or any kind of other dexterity then yeah i think i seem to do i

remember when i was a like a young teen all through my teen years my sister was a ballerina and my dad would always tell me dave you've got a dancer's life oh boy shut up dad Dave you got really like you and my dad was the president of Ballet BC and he's like

Dave you really have like you could you looked like a dancer yeah and I I was the opposite I was like if I went to a dance class

and discovered I was the best at it I would hate it of course like but I know I would be cause of course I would cause look at these look. But I know I would be, because of course I would be.

Look at these, look how graceful I am. Yeah. As soon as Dave said that, he pulled something off the table. Not a bit. Not a bit, but perfect. But I caught it before it landed on the ground. That is probably the thing I'm best at.

You're like the opposite of like Salieri and Mozart, you know, Amadeus, where he had a great passion for music, but he just didn't have the talent.

You have this great talent and I hate the thing that your talent lies in. Yeah, that you're not good at. I mean, I presume I have that talent. Yeah,

you'd never want it to test those waters. Because then they wouldn't let you quit. Yes. They'd be like, oh, my heart,

when I saw you dance all my all these rubbery limbs of mine yeah when i saw you do the what's a crazy dance the mashed potato yeah i'm trying to remember which one that is you like drums one leg yeah that makes sense um yeah the by the way I like on a podcast You're the one like this Yeah Just for me You confirmed it

Nobody else Well everybody else Can look it up Well they all know The mashed potato Yeah I mean if you know The twist

It's from the land Of a thousand dances Yes That I know Uh Yeah It's very funny Being told like

You got the money For it Like the legs Of a dancer. And it's true. I can point my toes pretty great. Yeah. Like naturally.

Yeah. I'm always like, people walk up to me and they're like, I'm sorry. I thought you were a flamingo, sir. Yeah. Oh, are you? Are you just naturally standing in first position? You have the torso of a gamer yeah because i like i would try i would always try things and then like if i wasn't instantly

good at them i was like oh forget i'm like that too yeah i'm like that too and i am actually i have a bit of a that uh jack of all trades problem too, though. Is that you can do a little bit, I'm not, I don't, I'm not great at these things. Right. Like, you know, I used to work in animation and I, so I can draw, I can, I can do it, but I'm not as good. Like I have friends who are doing, you know, they're, they're directors of like Hollywood films and stuff now that, that I'm like, yeah, that's great. I'm I would never, I also didn't care enough to push myself to want to do.

I didn't love drawing that much. It was just like a skill I could do that was like a day job. But it was like a cool day job that everybody thought was cool. But I was like, yeah, but it's still a job and I got to go there and I don't want to. Did you just like naturally know how to draw? Yeah. I had like a certain raw ability and then went to Sheridan College for animation and they had a really good program. So I got, I got much better at it.

I got to a professional level, but still I was like mediocre professional level. I didn't care about it. Yeah. I didn't work at it. Because my brother, he was just like naturally could draw, you know, lifelike, pretty accurate. Boobs? Perfect boobs. A perfect nipple every time.

He started with that. It took us all the while to get him away from me. He would put boobs on cars. It was kind of great. It was kind of a wonderful thing. Vin Diesel came around and said, I like this car.

But yeah, it was crazy because he never yeah he didn't take lessons or anything he just knew how to do that yeah and uh yeah it's fun i don't think i i don't think i've discovered the thing that i'm naturally oh yeah well because uh being quick on your feet with that yeah buddy i think you're doing it right now. You guys. I wasn't fishing, but I like what I caught. I remember one time playing poker, and the first time that I played poker, I just ran the table. I took everyone's money, and I was like, well, that's what I'm going to do. I'm a gambler.

I'm Kenny Rogers. I'm going to go from town to town and gamble. You knew when to hold them. Hold them, et cetera. The next weekend, same group of people. Lost everything. Lost everything I'd won the week before. I was like, I'm done with this forever.

I wasn't like, I would never chase the dragon on that. I was like, I had that one perfect night and I could just leave. Yeah, maybe that's the kind of thing like when you don't really even know how poker works. Yeah. That you don't, you haven't developed the bad habits yeah that everyone can pick up on i think that was it i think like i didn't know and i had to have like a little card telling me what what beats what yeah because uh and but through that i was like yeah i think just make a bet so that that i was like yeah i think just make a bet so that nobody would ever make yeah because they know better yeah um right yeah that's they can never nail you down yeah yeah but then the next week they were like oh he doesn't know what he's doing so anytime he uh bets just all meet him and uh

you've got a better hand than me and they were right uh yeah but yeah Like and then Maybe that's all Gamblers are Maybe they're just Chasing that one game That they did Really really good at And it's just Every week

They're just Yeah I don't know Sounds a little like Stand up actually Was it Did you do well Your first time When you went out

Yeah I did alright I mean it was Pretty good conditions I mean I'd Done improv before So I kind of had The confidence Of being on stage So it wasn't like Oh what's this Going to be like Yeah And then And then it was pretty good conditions. I mean, I, I'd done improv before, so I kind of had the confidence of being on stage.

So it wasn't like, Oh, what's this going to be like? Yeah. And then, and then it was one of those amateur nights where it was a bit of a bringer. So you bring your friends. So everybody's,

you know, everybody's bringing their friends and family. So it's a very supportive kind of group. Yeah. So I don't give myself full credit, but I was funny enough, I guess. Yeah.

Yeah. And it was anybody from that, do you, from that first open mic still around? Or were they all Oh I wouldn't remember that No I was too self absorbed to pay attention Anybody else on that stage? Do you

Remember like the first time Like who was on the show? I remember a couple of the people I remember the host I remember the host very clearly Because she was so angry to be there hosting That after the first act, she came off stage because I think it was up second, and she just whispered under her breath, she's like, a fucking monkey could do this. That's a good introduction into the business. Do I know her?

No, she maybe was around for a couple of years, and then she kind of maybe moved out of town. But yeah, I remember that very clearly being like, remember this, that a monkey could do whatever she just did. Don't be intimidated by this. That's what you tickled me. Not the bitterness that maybe one day you'll also have. No, yeah, exactly. I was talking to Brent Butt, and it's his 30th anniversary doing comedy this year. Wow.

Or maybe next year. And he said, I asked, do you remember who was up the first night? And he's like, two of them. Yeah. I'm still good friends with two of them. Interesting. For 30 years. Wow.

There may have been some people that I know, but I just don't. But I will say that I generally have a terrible memory with everything. Chunks of my life. I have old friends who will tell me things that happened and things I've said. And I'm like, oh, really? Well, that's quick. That's a quick number. Alex, you saved my life that one time.

I did? Yeah, you drove so fast. Because slow is fast. So, yeah, what we mean by that is. Yeah. But, yeah, I really don't remember a lot of things. So, it's not because that was my first night and I didn't care. I just don't remember a lot of stuff.

Do you remember from your first time that you did? What was it? El Cocal. And so, I'm sure it's people I still see. Yeah. It was kind of a scene. Right. So, you don't know either. Okay. I mean, I know Sean it's people I still see. Yeah. Yeah. It was a kind of a scene. Right. So you don't know either.

Okay. I mean, I know Sean Devlin hosted that night. There you go. He's still around. Yeah. So yeah, that's a, it's a funny, uh, cause yeah. I feel bad. I hate it when people like know, like everybody's like, oh yeah, of course I remember.

Oh no, exactly how many sets I've done. You know, I did, you know, I've done 456 sets. Oh, that's, those people got to let it go, man. They just got to live their life. I never counted. I have no idea. I never knew how many sets I did. I remember once in college, a guy had a picture of his high school girlfriend,

and someone made, like, a joke about it, but you never sealed the deal. And he named the exact number of times they had had sex. And it was like uh try 87 times all right i just picture you like you know just as soon as they're done like it's just an odometer just ticking over in his head like i'm looking at 100 come on 100 oh oh she got accepted to a different college. Can we do it 13 more times? Dave, what's going on with you, man? The other day.

Hello. I had a moment where I went from Dave, I turned from Dave. Yeah. Mr. Hyde. To Graham, Dr. Jackal. Wait, who's the nice guy? The doctor's the nice guy, right? I guess so, yeah. And because I was

driving home, it might have been no, it wasn't Mother's Day but it was a day when I was making breakfast for the family on the weekend and my neighborhood in recent years has become just like full of cars. There's nowhere to park. I was making breakfast for the family on the weekend. And, uh, my neighborhood in the, in recent years has become just like full of cars. There's nowhere to park.

And so there's one parking spot right outside the house. And, uh, there were these two guys in there in the parking spot, just standing there. Well, one guy was sitting on the curb and the other guy was, uh,

messing with something. And I was like, what? These guys are in the only spot. Yeah, why are they hanging out in a spot? And it was two guys fixing a wheelchair. So I was like, oh, okay. I'm going to do...

I'm not going to do what I would normally do. Honk. Which is park somewhere and then not make eye contact with them. They're right outside the house so I'm going to ask them if they need any tools. There you go. What would Graham do?

And while I don't have any ability to help them. Yeah. Here's some tools. It was a lot. So it was, uh, uh, and they didn't know what they needed because one guy was in pretty rough shape. And it was a, one of theirs wheelchair? Yeah.

The guy whose wheelchair it was might've been, these were, were hard on their luck kind of theirs. Wheelchair? Yeah. The guy whose wheelchair it was might have been. These were hard on their luck kind of guys. One guy, he might have been drunk at 10 in the morning. Ooh. In his wheelchair. And the wheel had come off. And I looked at it and they were just missing a bolt. I didn't have the bolt, but we were just trying to figure out like what we could shove in there.

Yeah, yeah. And really what i needed and i had them somewhere and i couldn't find them was zip ties because zip ties will do anything oh boy do they ever yeah i think i have a whole bag because i needed one once yeah i i have a giant bag or giant like you know like a 7-eleven uh promotional cup full of them. Yeah, yeah. But I couldn't find it. So I kept going inside and kept coming out with like, will this do anything? Here's a screwdriver.

Here's a wrench. Yeah, yeah. Is this anything? And the one guy helping was like, yeah, I can maybe do something with that. What else do you got? Yeah, yeah. So I go back inside and the guy sitting on the curb was like,

can you bring me a water? Oh, wow. So I go back inside, and the guy sitting on the curb was like, can you bring me a water? Oh, wow. Sure. Okay. And I was like, I can find that 7-Eleven promotional cup. But not the one full of zip ties. Did they eventually get the wheel? But yeah, they eventually got it on.

It's not going to stay on. No. But before he had any tools, he was just trying to tighten stuff with his fingers. And it seemed really like he kept hurting them. And you can only screw something so much with your fingers. But have you ever met a guy, like a kind of construction-y guy, who can just like... He's like tightening a bolt with his fingers. And you're like, no, no, no, stop doing that.

And then you're like, oh, no, no his fingers are like they've calloused over yeah they're they're made of uh stronger stuff than you and i you know yeah and eventually yeah by the end they were they were rolling off and i found the zip ties and i ran over to them and gave them a handful and i said you're gonna need yeah yeah this is what i I, this would have saved us 45 minutes, but here they are. Oh, man. Yeah, zip ties really, zip ties, you know, duct tape, of course. Sure. And recently, the one thing that I bought that I've been using for everything is just, like, a little bit of wire.

Like, I've just, like, anything that needs, like, this thing to attach to this this thing but tape would look kind of not great what kind of wire like just like uh like metal yeah what you would hang like a picture with like oh you know picture hanging wire that's good for also uh killing people yeah like piano piano yeah yeah yeah see i told you it's good for everything uh but yeah i've just uh made like little repairs with it. Pretty good. I like, you know, you can, you know how to like undo a zip tie. No. Because you can kind of, there's like a little pressure.

You know, the way it closes, you can actually push against it and then pull it out again. Oh. So they can be reusable. I did not know that. Yeah, you can look at it. You can Google that shit. But, and also duct tape has got, everybody knows it's got the worst glue on it, right? Really?

It's not that good. Actually, I. In terms of like. Like it doesn't. Like staying stuff. It doesn't always hold up. Like it's, I don't know. I actually found that, I mean, there's a product, you know, the placement in a way.

But that Gorilla Tape, it's like the same as duct tape, but it's a really, really strong. Yeah, yeah. Glue. I got some of that Gorilla Tape I go with that instead Yeah yeah It's People listening

That's why I go with it It gets the Nussbaum seal of approval There was a couple guys Working right outside my door today Because they were fixing Like the landlord's Part of the garage Needed fixing

And they were Two of those Like We're fixing We can fix anything Kind of guys And they were listening of those like we're fixing we can fix anything guys and they were listening to the classic rock at uh you know nine o'clock in the morning i was like boy oh boy i feel like i got something done just by being around these were they listening in one of those like dusty dewalt uh right oh yeah bright yellow uh stereos you get at Home Depot? Yeah. They had the Depot stereo. They had like a thing with all the drill batteries charging.

And yeah, I walked out and they were, it was a very, like, it was a moment where I was leaving my place at 11 o'clock and they were both like, good morning. And you were like, keep it down. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love those boom boxes that are made by a construction, like a tool making company. Yeah. And I also love when you look into a cop car, when they have that laptop that looks like it's bulletproof. Yeah. I want one of those because it's a brand.

It's like, because I was looking at it in a movie and it has a brand name. The like black with the. Ah, I want one of those. Tactical laptop. Yeah, I want a tactical laptop. That's what I want. Oh, you know what? I haven't looked it up if this is an actual brand, but do you know what a breezeway is?

No. It's outside a construction site when they put up a little. Oh, like the little thing that you walk in in the through the sidewalk yeah the covered thing i just saw some there's construction over on everywhere yeah and uh they had uh this thing just had a brand name it was the breezeway whoa like we make the breezeway i mean if you're gonna buy a breezeway you know go with the name brand yeah it's like those trailers atco the the final name in trailers you know like job site trailers they're all atco i would have gone with kleenex or xerox not atcoco. Yeah. The Atlantic Records.

Well, that was very nice of you. Well, I thought, what would Graham do? That's interesting. So I'm trying to, this dynamic that I'm seeing between you two, so you're the heart of gold, and so that would make you? I'm just, you know. He's a jack of all trades. Yeah, sure. I'm not the opposite of a heart of gold. I'm just, you know. He's a jack of all trades. Yeah, sure. I'm not the opposite of a heart of gold.

I'm just, I keep to myself. Yeah. And I know I'm of very little use to people. Like I couldn't help them. I could just give them things to help themselves. Right. Yeah. And you don't want to draw too much attention to how useless you are.

Yeah. Right. So my job was mostly like, okay, I'll come back in five minutes, pick this stuff up. You know what you're doing. You know what you're doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's more fear-based.

Yeah, sure. Yeah. Oh, does that not come with IKEA instructions that I cannot help you? Yesterday, I went to... Did this art get to know you? No, it was just something in line of that. Because I went to a wedding yesterday, so I was wearing a suit,

and I passed by a guy who was panhandling, and I was like, I don't have any money, and he really didn't. Like, I don't look like I should be wearing a suit, but I think he was under the impression, like, yeah, but you've got a suit on. You must have money. And I was like, yeah, i can see where you're coming from but also try and look above the suit yeah like work with me but also i have money never now no no i know like i i don't have any now i didn't have any yesterday i i feel for you but i am changeless you know it would be if

there was some sort of organization that could give them something where I can just do a tap. Do the quick $2 tap, you know, on a phone. Because they got those things. What do they call them? Tiles or whatever? No, not tiles. No, no, no. Squares.

Squares. Atco. The last name in swiping. So what's going on with you? I went to New York City for a couple days. Oh, I forgot about that. I went to New York. Is that where you got that t-shirt? No, this is an antique that's live with Kelly and Michael because now it's Kelly and Ryan.

No, I just went for a couple of days and, uh you know it was fun fun city went and saw a broadway show what'd you see i saw groundhog day the musical no yes i didn't know that that was happening yeah and it was uh so what happened was at the very beginning of the show uh this voice comes on the loudspeaker like the show starts. They're into the opening number, and then a voice comes on and says, all actors leave the stage. We've got a technical gaffe, and everybody in the crowd was like, let's fire the show.

They're just going to restart. They're going to keep restarting the show, and that's going to be hilarious. It wasn't. We all sat there in the audience like it slowly dawned on people like this is taking a long time for a gag and then you could see like flashlights underneath the curtain and you're like oh something's broken something's very broken and then a spider-man fell out of the rafters i've been up there for months

anyways they got it fixed and everything and it was a good that they stopped it because it the whole stage rotated the whole time like that's how they kind of created the effect the repeating days so i guess something had jammed and the whole show would have been pointless without that rotating stage did ask, does anyone have zip ties? Is there anyone in the audience with a bolt? Stick a screwdriver in it. Maybe that'll... Was this just a vacation? This was just a short...

You do a lot of business there in the salsa industry. Yeah, I went to the Facebook County Museum. Facebook County's not from new york oh the the competitors sure yeah get a row empire state salsa empire state of of uh mouth nachos where there's our something there you go um but yeah the uh went saw a show and this is a thing that uh when you and i were in new york we noticed before is that if you ask somebody for any kind of recommendation in new york everybody just goes well everything they don't ever give you a specific they go everything's good yeah where is it good to eat i don't know here's a thousand restaurants why

don't you look it up yeah they're just like i'm walking it's all yeah it's all good just go and and so what's a good new york movie and they'll be like i don't know they're all great the city's a character um but yeah like and then one guy guy, like one guy at the hotel recommended something and I went and ate there and it was terrible. So the one time that I did actually secure a recommendation. I hate that. I hate that. That's what I don't like the idea of when you get a recommendation from one person. I don't know who you are.

I don't know what your taste is. It really is. It's as much of a crapshoot as just going in a place and, you know, hoping that it's a decent place anyway. Yeah. I mean, I don't want to necessarily always rely on the apps, but, you know, at least you're playing a good game of averages there. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. What was the New Yorkiest thing you did other than seeing a Broadway show?

I went on the Staten Island Ferry. Ah. And that's, it's like a free ferry that you can go see. Statue of Liberty. Hi, statue. Give us your et ceteras, et ceteras. And then that, I think that was the two most New York-y things. Walk through Times Square.

Did you see King Kong? Yeah, yeah. King Kong was up there. He was hanging out on the statue of liberty oddly he moves around oh really yeah yeah he was kissing the statue um it's not a real doll king kong king kong there's kids in the city um but yeah it was it was getting too close. And I stayed at a hotel that was called The Jane. And it's basically like if Wes Anderson ran a hotel. Oh.

All the people, bell people, were wearing the purple. They had bells palsy. They had the brass buttons and the round old-timey hats. Right. He did a movie about a hotel yeah it was yes there's a quirky soundtrack constantly playing yeah yeah and it was the you could stay either in just like a normal room or you could stay in like kind of the hostel-y floors that had like bunk beds it was so wes anderson i can't even just picture what Wes Anderson would do in a hotel. That's what it was. I've seen it.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was, uh, and I guess like it's history was, it was the, when all the survivors of the Titanic kind of landed on the East coast,

that's where they stayed until they were like, so they were buried. You live here now. And, just when you die, we'll, uh, bury you.

Oh, they don't bury survivors. I've gotten caught in a riddle. Oh, the classic. It's a classic riddle. And one of my favorite things that I saw was walking down the street and I saw this sign from like two blocks away. Nice neon sign. Rainbow, right?

And I thought it was a bookstore because i thought it said everyone's reading i was like that's a really cool name for a bookstore or at least a slogan for a bookstore and then i got close and it just said eyebrow threading so yeah that explains your eyebrows yeah that's what you guys noticed um yeah so i've never noticed. Your eyebrows are very. They're very light. Faint.

Yeah. Yeah. I have the same affliction. You do. They're just kind of this and then they just fade out. Now, here's a question. Have you ever had somebody kind of darken them for you? A little bit.

Yeah. A makeup artist doing that a little bit. Yeah. I dated a makeup artist who suggested that I do that. I'm like, I looked at myself and I look at myself and I feel like I look more Arabic with the,

like I look, it made me look, um. I felt like I looked really strange when the person, like they just kind of like filled it into

where eyebrows usually end. Yeah. Now since you both have, yeah, they're sort of darker towards the nose, the bridge, and then lighter at the edges but

mine i get very long hairs as it as i get further oh yeah you have that sometimes they grow sometimes but no one can see them yeah sometimes right like long they're your little secret yeah well once in a while i'll get one just that comes up like right in the middle of the eyebrow yeah i gotta you gotta yank those yeah yeah and it's uh it's unpleasant it is unpleasant i know i know you're talking about sometimes i wonder i wonder what my eyes are looking like if i got like eyebrow implants if they if i filled out some of those areas is that a thing that exists i don't know and i haven't looked it up yet i wonder what my eyes would look like if I invented eyebrow implant. Well, I was talking with somebody about how, what if monobrowse came into fashion? Because, you know, right now, women, very thick eyebrows is it.

I always kind of like the thick eyebrows on the ladies. Yeah, I don't know why, too. I don't know why I find it so compelling. Maybe because you don't have eyebrows to enjoy at home. So you think that's where it's coming from. It's the other. It's the other. Exactly.

Well, we want women because they are not like us. Yes. Your eyebrows complete me. I'm just a boy standing in front of a great set of brows. But what if monobrow came? For men? Yeah. If that came in. Because it's quite a powerful look, if monobrow came what are men yeah if that came in because it is a it's quite a powerful look the monobrow certainly slavic yeah but don't you find like when you see it it looks yes it looks mighty well yeah because it's sort of it's an accentuates the

idea of a brow which is generally a you know that's a chromagnon type of yeah yeah and and it's like it says this guy doesn't care what anyone thinks this guy's heard it and has done nothing exactly yeah that's right that's right it's just he's not image centered he doesn't uh he doesn't have to he will not pluck for you i believe i believe there will be like andy warhol this will be my prediction in the future everyone will have a monobrow for one season. I don't think I can grow it back. Did you have? No,

I mean, like I had occasionally it was closer and then I would just like pluck the ones right out of the middle. Yeah. And then they don't grow back. Like they grow back a few times, but then eventually the follicle gives up. I didn't like shape.

I just, it was literally just the vertical. Yeah. I've never, I've never had one in the. Yeah. I could use, I could use a, I could use some eyebrow implants. Yeah.

I was going to say that if I did have a monobrow, I'd get the doctor to take out like the same way they remove the hairs from the back of your head and they put them in the front. I'd have them remove those and put them on the ends of my eyebrows to fill those areas up. Yeah. Yeah, that would be the curse if you just had

the middle part and not the eyebrows. That would be strange. That would be so strange. I'm trying to picture it. It's like the Hitler mustache of eyebrows. Yeah, you have a very limited amount of expressions you can make. You're just kind of not really ever, because it just is moving up and down.

It's not, are you surprised? Are you mad at me? Are you happy? Are you scared? You're scared. Oh, boy. Do we want to move on to some overheard? Well, yes.

Hello, Amita Patel. Hello, Sean David Johnson. What's going on? I think a friend of mine may have chronic pop culture deficiency syndrome. Oh, no. PCDS? What are the symptoms? Well, she doesn't know Wakanda from Westeros.

Shameful. And she keeps confusing Aziz Ansari and Riz Ahmed. Oh, my gosh. So sad. Kind of racist, too. But what did you tell her to do? I told her to listen to our podcast, Inside Pop, of course. Fantastic idea.

A weekly dose of Inside Pop will help anyone discover the best in TV, film, and music. Suffer from PCDS no more. Inside Pop has you covered every Wednesday on MaxFun. How many times has this happened to you oh man if only i knew whether it was better to be too hot or too cold or who the best james bond was that girl would have gone out with me now you can with we got this with mark and hal the podcast from maximumfund.org every tuesday hey lois it's joey the best james bond was daniel cra. And it's better to be too cold than too hot. Thanks, We Got This with Mark and Hal.

Only on MaximumFun.org. Or wherever you get fine podcasts. Overheard. Overheard's a segment in which we hear things out there in the world, and then we chat about them on the podcast. And we always like to start with the guest. Right. You bring something hilarious that you overheard.

Well, I mean, I don't know if it's that hilarious. Today, I have also, I had something from earlier, but then today, as I was getting my doner, I heard a woman who didn't have a British accent say, no onions, please. Oh, sorry, she wanted onions, but no tomato. Oh, that's very classy of her. Yeah, but it's like it's a very quick way to have me not like you.

Right. It's the fast track. Yeah. Tomato. I mean, if only there was a song about us pronouncing things differently and how it's, whether or not we should call the whole thing off this is where you guys edited in the song yeah you know um do you want to say the one that happened well the other one was the other one was uh this was last week when i was in a um

a cafe in uh los angeles i um why would you drive there? Well, it's an entry-level sports luxury sedan. But I actually heard to two young ladies, and they probably would have been early, early 20s at least, talking about a guy who's really great, would do anything for me, so great, such a a nice guy but i'm just not attracted to him i just wish i was and so to hear like yeah a new generation of the same old shit right yeah yeah it's like um well classic you've got the classic conundrum yeah yeah it's sort of like you know i just and like literally saying it all like note for note how you know being

attracted to the asshole and i'm just listening in on this. And I say listening in on this conversation. And I just thought, we'll never learn. No. And that's why we haven't conquered space travel. We're still focused on the little, you know, the little minutia. For the home listener, we have conquered space travel. Just so you know,

Graham, misspoke, don't write in. I acknowledge that as a people, we've gotten to space. Mostly nice guys, not assholes. True. True. Yeah, he's been to space. I just am not attracted to him. Outside of that space suit.

Well, no, I'm really attracted to his dangerous friend, Buzz. First man to smoke on the moon. Dave, do you have one over here? Well, I have one that's not really an overheard, but it just came to mind because I was watching... Well, I have a two-year-old daughter and a five-month-old daughter.

I can't believe she's five months already. I'll get over it. I'm trying. But the two-year-old's the only one who talks to me because she knows words. And so sometimes I'll be talking to her and then something else will happen and I'll say something about, like, I'll be in traffic and I'll just tell another driver, go! Yeah. And she'll say, who are you I'll be in traffic and I'll just tell another driver, go. Yeah. And she'll say, who are you talking to? What's going on?

And today, uh, because you mentioned live with Kelly and Ryan Seacrest, uh, uh, that was on TV and I was kind of putting laundry away and Margo was sitting on the bed. Uh, and, uh, the woman from orange is the new black the blonde lady was on yeah and they were talking to her and the question was now so many people love your show and and it's really like the people who who like the show just adore it and why do you think it's been such a big hit and the the woman from the, from Orange is the New Black says, well, I think people are really smart. And I said, oh,

shut up. And Margo said, who are you, who are you talking to? Who are you talking to? Anyway. No, Will Margo eventually,

does she think that you have an imaginary friend? Maybe. Who's a terrible driver and really pompous. But my overheard is from right outside this window. I was in the yard and I heard this, uh, like middle-aged couple. I don't think they were a couple. They were a guy and a girl together. Uh, and he, they kept seeing these little dogs. Like there was a dog

across the street and they went over to pet it. And they came over to this side of the street. They saw a dog wearing a cone. Oh, let's pet it. It'll stop and pet it. And then another dog came around the corner. A nice little dog. And they talked to the owner and they were petting it. And as they were walking away, the guy just goes, what a wonderful puppy corner.

Oh, goodness. Oh, wow. I'll meet you at puppy corner yeah oh man um like that's a thing like a puppy corner is a thing yeah i mean they may have made it a thing it's a dorbs whatever you know um yeah puppy corner i mean i'd go if I knew that there was a dedicated puppy corner. I mean, certainly if I was, uh, if I was,

if I was a, a boy puppy fixing to get, uh, a girl puppy, I go to the puppy corner. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It used to be the off leash was the place now puppy corner. Yeah. But it's turned such a meat market. Oh yeah. Which puppies love. Yeah. corner yeah but it's turned such a meat market oh yeah which probably is long yeah get a good shank bone hey graham yeah who's a good boy i am okay um i just uh my overheard was on uh on it was in new york on the train and there was this guy who uh to describe him talk to love him yeah he he uh used he used the word bro a lot and i was like what does this guy look like and he kind of he had like a short kind of amish style beard so like a beard with no mustache part yeah and he

was dressed in a suit and the way that he was was talking, I was like, is this guy, is he a businessman? And then it slowly emerged that he like worked in a department store. And he, I don't know if he was like, had just mastered saying this word so that he wanted to say it over and over again. But he said Massapequa so many times in this one story. He's like, well, and then, then you know todd transferred to massapequa and they do things different in massapequa and he just kept saying massapequa over and over again and then he's telling this story to a very bored friend who i don't think works at the department store and the big topper of the story was uh anyways todd moved to massapequa and uh well he uh bought me a sweater with his uh

employee discount and uh i still have that sweater that was the big that was the big culmination of the story but i was like how does this story not end with a note about massapequa like it's it's so so massapequa heavy where isapequa? I guess it's close to New York. It's somewhere in New York State. Oh, is it New York? Okay. Yeah. I think.

I mean, the way this guy was talking about it. It's Northeast for sure. Yeah. I'm going to say it's New York. Yeah. It sounds like a New York State type of a name. Can't look it up. No way of looking it up.

And, you know, Todd, he was working in the big city, but they do things different in Massapequa. Yeah. He likesapequa. Yeah. He likes it there. Right. You know. Yeah, I'm wondering in what way do they do things differently. Well, they say, welcome to Massapequa, first of all. Yeah, the customer's always wrong there.

Oh, yeah, everything's backwards. Oh, no. Wait a second. What is Massapequa backwards? The store returns things to you. Isn't a superman villain named mr mesopequa and if you say it backwards yeah then you sentence him to life in space um i was watching a news story or i was watching the news and a news story came on about how sears canada is in trouble and no shit

these news stories have got to go away. No one cares about it. Like we're all aware. We're all aware because we've never gone to see it. That's right. To be honest, what took them so long? Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, like what with Target and Zellers. They got to be hot on the heels of that. And they had a, it was, the story was on mute. So I didn't hear the story, but I saw they kept like showing a sign at Sears. And it was just for a promotion called WTS. What the Sears? Are you serious? Yeah.

Well, there's your problem. Yeah, yeah. I mean, we tried WTS. That didn't work. We're trying to, we're not an online store, but we do online things tried WTS. That didn't work. We're trying to. We're not an online store, but we do online things. WTS. Yeah, we're selling emoji pillows.

I mean, I don't know. I don't know what to. It is a tough time, I think, to be a store that has stoves and also shirts and also kids' stuff. And also like, you know, that, that used to be a thing that you needed to have. Yeah.

And now not. So it's gotta be like, why don't they just sell the one thing? Special. Yeah. Special. Everything's specialty now. But it's weird because Amazon is basically. Right.

But everything. Actually, it's what I was going to say. There's all kinds of articles now Saying how retail is dying It's dying a death Just in general? In general

Absolutely Yeah yeah The brick and mortar Is on it's way out in a way But is shopping Like is shopping Something anybody here enjoys? Like going out to a store

And actually like No And I used to Like I I like going out Cause some people and actually like no i and i used to like i i like going out because some people do some people like but like the human interaction of like someone being like can i get any more sizes no i'll just you've done enough you've done enough i'll just buy what you gave me because yeah i don't know like sometimes uh i'll go in a store that's like one of these kind of

like like um like a gift store and i won't know what i'm looking for but i know i'm looking for a gift but you can't do that online really you can't be like gifts you know what i mean like you would have to go and smell the candles so i but yeah i don't know what i mean like you would have to go and smell the candles so i but yeah i don't know like i'm like you know is shopping a thing that people actually enjoy doing i think generally no i think it is definitely especially you know the way i've i became obsessed with you know because i had to buy a bunch of new stuff for a new price. And then I, and I also kind of got into the habit of Googling best blank, whatever I was looking for. And then I find,

and then I'll find it online as yeah, just ship it to me. Why do I have to go from store to store to see who has it? We've got the cheapest price. I get a little endorphin rush buying something online. And then I get to, I get the fun of tracking it. And also when,

and also getting a, getting a package. Oh yeah. Getting a package. Oh, it's out with the courier. It. And also getting a package. Oh, yeah, getting a package. Oh, it's out with the courier. It's out with delivery courier. It was transferred. It was transferred through Don Mills. Oh, no, it's been put in an oven.

The dominoes tracker in this is crossfats. Oh, no. Barry's doing a quality check on it, but it's a hat. What does Barry know about hats? Yeah, it showed up with too much sauce. Now, it's sort of half fedora, half pepperoni.

Yeah, I saw an ad like a giant billboard of, it was for the beer Peronioni but the photo was a woman with a towel and it just said peroni on the towel and then uh a sexy lady yeah sexy lady but somebody pointed out that it could be an ad for pepperoni um no we uh also have overheard sent in from people Around the world You know what

Food is really the only thing I like to buy in a store Food and beer Like going to a special beer store See beer is something that I If it was an option to order it Online and it would show up Cold that's something that I would just like Buy online Now the new save on foods has ordering online And you just pick it up online and it would show up cold, that's something that I would just like buy online.

Now the new Save On Foods has ordering online and you just pick it up. Yeah. And that's pretty good too. This is the thing too. It's like this means you don't have to take it to your car and then from your car to your home. It's just right at your doorstep. Yeah. Especially if you're talking about, you know, you're getting a two-four of beer.

That's just boom. You just pick it up, put it to the, take it to the fridge. Yeah. Yeah. Like if there was cold, if there was cold alcohol delivery, that would be. I think especially if it's something you already know you,

you buy every week. Yeah. Right. I mean, I buy a hundred beers. That's right. Yeah. They do.

I'm sure there is something like that in every city where they'll do a, they'll, you know, buy the bottle and bring it over. It used to be you would call a cab company and you would ask there was a thing that you had to ask for though like it was in a code word

but if you said, hey, can you go buy alcohol and bring it over to my house? They'd be like, we don't do that. But if you called and said bottle service or something like it was, it had some term. Oh, okay. But you needed to know what the term was. Right. Yeah. Because I don something like it was it had some term oh okay but you needed to know what the term was yeah because i don't think it was illegal but i was underage so it wasn't legal right that was the whole thing so like then the cab shows up and you give him extra twenty dollars

did not to keep his mouth yeah yeah you didn't see nothing and then he's like I know your parents aren't home I'm robbing the place aha my parents are home they're just neglectful I'm wearing a bathing suit as underwear it's like one touche after another now if you want to send in an overheard to us, you can send it into sbyatmaximumfun.org.

This first one comes from Will in Maryland. Uh-huh. On vacation. Massapequa, Maryland? Maryland. Massapequa. I'm on vacation in London, and I was going to dinner in a neighborhood with many Indian restaurants. and I was going to dinner in a neighborhood with many Indian restaurants.

Each restaurant has an employee standing out front, trying to draw customers inside with various sales tactics. As we walked by one, the person out front said, there are over 40 curry restaurants here, but this is the only one that Chris Martin from Coldplay was in. Was in. Yay. He also may have left not enjoying it. He used our toilet. Because he ate at the 39

other ones. He shat in ours. Wow. Yeah, I mean, sure. I guess. And it was all yellow. Alright, everybody. There we go. Can't top that.

Yep. It's real, real good. Thank you. This next one comes from just Jay. Hi, Jay. Jay in the UK. I was grabbing some lunch at a small fish and chips store this afternoon. Classic.

Yeah, UK. Classic UK breakfast. I overheard 12-year-old kids chattering while I ate. The discussion was regarding a man they had seen across the street they believed to be a local robber who wanted to steal their bikes. The highlight of the discussion went as follows. We need to catch him and call the police. Jude, you're our martial arts expert, right? Yeah.

I took one Aikido class. Yeah. Yeah, I'm Jude, the martial arts. You're our pyrotechnics expert. Exactly. The guy was only planning to steal their bikes? Yeah. Or he had done it?

No, they were afraid that this guy was going to steal their bikes. Well, let's call the cops because I think this guy is going to steal their bikes? Yeah. Or he had done it? No, they were afraid that this guy was going to steal their bikes. Well, let's call the cops because I think this guy's going to steal our bikes. Going to ride two away at once. Yeah, but like, if you were part of a squad. Right. What would you be? Like a Cracker Jack team? Cracker Jack team and A team.

What would you, what would be your. Specialty? Yeah. Look out. Yeah. Look out. Yeah. Mine would be... And as always on lookout, Alex. Mine would be squad goals.

I would be like reminding everyone, hey, are these the goals we want as a squad? Let's just check out this hashtag. Would you also be taking photos of everything? Yeah. I'm going to... Oh, no. I mistyped the hashtag. Would you also be taking photos of everything? Yeah. I'm going to, uh, Oh no,

I'm, I mistyped the hashtag guys. These are squid goals. Squaggles. Um, this last one comes from you, Graham. What would yours be?

I think I would be, I'd be muscle. No wild card. Right. Right. So like nobody's sure, but you know, in a pinch,

right. Something's going to, you'll, you'll, you'll disrobe and run into the situation. Yeah. Right. So like nobody's sure, but you know, in a pinch. Right. Something's going to happen. You'll disrobe and run into the situation. Yeah, if they need a distraction while they steal the Dubai car so they can drive it out of the top floor. So they can drive it. Yeah. Sex drive. We just want to drive your car.

Jest. Probably don't want to put jest in there. That usually makes it suspicious already just relax man we just want to drive your car um this last one comes from jason in san jose uh as a rule we don't allow our kids to play with our iphones but they see us use siri from time to time the other day my four-year-old daughter asked if she could talk to Siri for the first time, and I reluctantly agreed. She took the phone into the other room, held down the button, and asked Siri,

how many gallons of blood does a baby have? Give that phone back. Privilege revoked. Yeah, really. I mean, how many? No more than more than well i guess it depends on the weight yeah yeah yeah and uh a gallon weighs four pounds no four kilograms four kilograms is a gallon well four liters is four kilograms okay yeah so that's eight but blood is thicker than one yeah that's eight. But blood is thicker than water. Yeah, that's true. Just about nine pounds in a gallon. And what?

Yeah. Yeah. So an 18-pound baby is mostly blood, I think. But it's a question that the kid didn't want to ask the parents. Sure. No, because they don't know. Can Siri give your kids the talk instead of you? Like, just ask Siri.

What do you want to ask? Like, where do babies come from? Siri? Because that's the talk. That's how the talk starts, right? Yeah, that's a good one. Ask your parents, maybe, Siri. Siri, where do babies come from?

Guys, you keep talking. Oh, sorry, sorry. Siri, where do babies come from? Okay, I found this on the web for where do babies come from. I could have Googled it. Yeah. That's where Siri ends and the web begins. Siri has to start to get to know the web a bit better.

Yeah. Come on, Siri. God damn it. Now, in addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls. If you want to call us, it's dead simple, mate. You just dial a Zambazinio telephone Aruni. Jesus. Is this because the last guy was from the UK?

1-844-779-7631. That is one. Tomato. Spy pod. One. Like these people have. Yeah, they do say Aruni a lot over there. Hey, Dave Graham and lovely guests.

This is Karen calling from Philadelphia. I'm at a conference, and I just overheard at a social hour, one person asked another person why they weren't having an Indian street. And they said, oh, I'm a member of the Church of Latter-day Saints. Oh, really? Yeah. I used to go out with friends from work, and they kept wanting me to drink. They would even buy me drinks and say, I've got it for you. Now you have to drink it. And I thought, maybe I'll just tell them I'm Mormon, and then they won't do this anymore.

So then I joined the church. Love the show. Oh, wow. That's, you know, I was already doing the thing, so I just thought, sign up. I'd tell them I'm Mormon, and they were like, prove it. Or maybe a Mormon approached them and started chatting and started saying, well, look, if you're going to use our...

Yeah. Yeah. That's cultural appropriation. That's right. I like that you would, yeah, convert just for one social situation. Yeah. To not drink. Yeah.

Like, it's a pretty easy one because don't you... The easier way would just be to say that you're an drink. Yeah. Like, it's a pretty easy one, because don't you, the easier way would just be to say that you're an alcoholic. Yeah. And people aren't going to try and force it on you. Well, but then you have to accept a higher power. There's a religious thing about that, too. Yeah, that's true. And also, you know, then there's, you don't want to be, have the stigma associated.

That's a terrible thing to say. Yeah, but it's an easier way like if people are like no i can't also what kind of friends are like i can't it's my religion here drink this anyways i bought it for you but well that got her out of it oh i was the saying the religion but it was because people like it's like a weird thing that was in like made for tv movies and you know tv shows about kids getting peer pressured right someone offering you drugs that doesn't happen no because drugs are so expensive but if you don't drink people will try to get you to drink yes and you have a reason like you don't have a legitimate reason why you're not drinking but yeah why uh you know like i know some comics that

it they tell the bartender if they're doing like a road gig or whatever if somebody sends up a shot just send up water water or coke or something yeah something that's not a shot because uh because that's insane yeah that's an insane thing that happens where people are like, get drunker up there. Be more, you know, my personal clown. Well, I think stand-up shows are kind of, for some people, they feel like it's a party, right? I mean, that's why they get involved. And hecklers sometimes just want to, they feel like they're part of the show. They feel like it's a party

where everybody's getting drunk and we're having a good time. What's the problem? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess that's a lot of like, bachelorette parties go to comedy clubs and stuff. Oh, the stupidest thing in the world when they do that,

when they sell a comedy show to bachelor or bachelorette parties. Oh, like this is part of the- Yeah, sort of like, oh, it'll be fun. It'll be like a party. You guys, you know, we'll make fun of you. And they go, yeah It'll be like a party You guys you know We'll make fun of you And you go Yeah that does sound fun

Yeah the host Will maybe make fun of you For like 30 seconds And then shut up For an hour and a half While you're with All your friends That you haven't seen

In a while Shut up Stephanie Are you Are you still Off the wagon On the wagon Wait which one is the

Are we doing a Mormon Oh a Mormon bachelorette A Mormon bachelorette party Can't dance with the boys Gotta keep a whole What is it a whole person's Width between you or something Yeah I have a bit about that

Jesus Keep Jesus between you Yeah that's what Somebody I know from Catholic school said Leave enough room for Jesus between you Oh That's a classic Paul Walker Vin Diesel car situation. Yeah.

Leave the Popemobile between you. Here's your next overheard. Hi, Dave and Graham and probable guests. This is Elizabeth in Portland. I'm calling with an overheard. I was at the grocery store yesterday, and there was this dad with his son, and the kid was probably seven or eight and the dad was talking to him in a baby voice that felt kind of young for his kid's age and he was going through

their list and he was saying like okay do we need bread do we need eggs do we need kisses and then he tried to kiss his son and the kid was like no we need kisses? Do we need kisses? And then he tried to kiss his son and the kid was like, no, we need Doritos. Stay on point, Dad. You were going through the boring things and then you tried to skip over the most exciting grocery, Doritos.

By distracting me with your kisses. It's not going to work. Oh, boy. That's the one thing, shopping with your parents and having that boring experience. That is, as a dad, that is so fun, though. What, to bring a kid? It kills time, which is the number one thing you need to do as a parent.

You get to walk around a store, point at things, not let them have things. Oh, is that enjoyable you find as a parent? No, it's not. I can't do it. I always cave and get something. Yeah.

Not everything. There was a smart thing, like when I was a kid, you'd go to Canadian Tire and there's nothing there for a kid maybe now there is but there's they now have at the one on seventh and can be really long flat escalators oh man that is so for a kid like they're not steps they're just a big long like a ramp or yeah ramp ramp you walk with yeah remember they had, like, gumball machines at the exit. That's right, yeah.

Yeah, so that was very, like, very clever placement because it was like, okay, you went through the boredom of, you know, picking up every garden tool. Yeah. And, like, opening that one area where it was all doors. You could just, like, open up a door or, like, ring a doorbell. And you came with me to the bank before So we could come To the store Because this was the 80s Oh the bank trip

And then I ended up Oh there's the lineup Oh my god We're going to the bank What did I do And then I ended up With a bunch of change So now I have to

Put it in this machine And oh it's perfect The bank is made To look like the most boring is just oh there's just walls and it's beige yeah walls and just places to line up that's all there is and offices of oh but like and then offices where they're not allowed to personalize it at all so it's just like it's got a bank calendar on the wall and some bank bauble on the desk i've never been no i don't know maybe once i've been in one of those bank offices but it does feel like when you go to the bank like i don't want to get pulled the principle of the bank is gonna get mad me. We notice you've been screwed around at the ATM.

Sometimes the bank will call me and be like, Hey, I wonder if we can set something up for whatever your accounts. And I'll say, no. Can we meet in a neutral space? Can we go to a cafe? No, no, come to the bank. It's weird. It's a bank that I don't go to.

Really? But it's from The bank I belong to But not the branch I go to Oh and they're like They're under the impression They're my home branch And they're not And they're

They're trying to steal you away Maybe from the other branch Yeah That's right They see an opening Yeah come hang out We got these couches It's not like the other banks

Yeah We're the cool bank. We're orange. Here's your final overheard. Hi, Dave and Graham and Christopher Guest. This is Hunter from Washington, D.C.

I haven't overheard from a few years ago, but I was walking around in Macy's and somebody who worked there approached a young man like 25-ish and said,

would you like to smell this new fragrance that we have? And he very excitedly said, sure, I'll smell anything. I live my life by one code. Well, I don't have to be anywhere for a few hours, so what do you got? Yeah, yeah. Well, you'll have an abattoir over here

to stick your head into. Yeah, sure. I'll smell anything. Twice if I like it. Oh, boy. See, you miss out on that if you don't go to stores.

Exactly. Samples. That's the one thing that stores still have the market on. That's true. Well, Costco knows

what they're doing there. Yeah, get like a little bit, a little piece of a cinnamon roll. Yeah. You know, they say like,

you know, not to go grocery shopping hungry, except for Costco because they got so many samples. You could get lunch by the time you're done.

Yeah. Also, Ikea, get some of those. Well, they've got like a full menu now yeah it's not samples yeah but it used to be just meatballs and now it's like you can get an actual you can

go on a date i think maybe they know that it's like the bay the bay has a cafeteria that's right yeah it's like it's cafeteria style yeah do you remember because like also like the now defunct Eaton's also had a cafeteria and I feel like it was always in the basement. Like in the window, like there was no natural light and it was just kind of like you could hear the light like. Yeah. Department store prison. Yeah. It's like. Yeah.

The whatever, like a pot like a church. Oh, yeah. Church potluck at church. Oh yeah. Church potluck. Was that a thing in Ontario? Potluck? Uh. I don't know if that's a cross Canada. Yeah, potluck in general.

But I mean, my experience with potlucks usually were like at, at, at, you know, at a job or whatever, where they decided to have a potluck. Right. Right. I mean, I. But did somebody like, I feel like. Or even like, yeah. Or even like, you know, someone decided to have a potluck. Right. Right. I mean, I, but did somebody like, I feel like, or even like, yeah.

Or even like, you know, someone has like a barbecue potluck. I mean, yeah. Yeah. Like, would you always have somebody bring something in like a brown glass thing?

Sure. The casserole dish. Yeah. Yeah. But like, I think that's the only time I like, I've never seen one. The casserole dish.

Yeah. I've never just like seen. An amber Pyrex. Yeah. Ours was always the first Sunday of Advent. Okay. And you would go and you would, it was the clay event. And everyone in church would have a bunch of clay and you would make like angels and stuff to make this big nativity display.

Make a little Jesus. Were people assigned or would they end up with 25 Jesuses? You could do whatever you wanted. My dad always brought a garlic press and he would put clay through the garlic press and make sheep. Ah, pretty good. Yes. And then, uh, but I always was sick the next day. Like I stayed home from school the next day.

Cause I, I guess I ate the same thing every year and it made me barf 12 hours later. That was my only, like I wasn't a sick kid. I didn't miss a lot of school, but I missed that day every year. Weird. And you don't know what the item was, obviously, because you kept, huh. Yeah, probably was a casserole. Yeah. I remember also, like,

one time somebody bringing Rice Krispie Squares and they used those colored marshmallows instead of just plain... Oh. And I just remember thinking... Like, the face you're making is exactly the same face I made.

For the homeless, and he's making a face. Yeah, but I was just so upset. What color did it end up? Like, these like weird pastelly and but did they how did they melt into one color or was it a swirl it was a swirl of those that sounds great it does sound great but it when when it's not exactly what you're hoping for and it wasn't like the just regular old yeah i kind of feel like you kind of have a connection visual to flavor and then if the visual is off then it kind of yeah and you're like but

like whoever's this is the way they make them then and also are the are the colored ones also flavored slightly or no i feel like they were but that could have been 100 psychological it could be too because i was thinking that i think oh, I don't want like a fruit flavored rice pudding. Yeah, because I remember taking a bite and being like, I can't do this.

I'm not ready for this. Well, that brings us to the end of this here episode. This is coming out the 10th of July-ish. Thanks to everyone who came to see us

in Toronto. Yeah, what a lot of fun. And Graham's still in Toronto. Yeah, yeah. lot of fun. And Graham's still in Toronto. Yeah, yeah. I'll be at the Toronto Fringe doing a show called Graham Clark's Not Here. And then,

in the Winnipeg Fringe, doing a show called Instagram. So is that what you wanted to plug? Yeah, is that what you were hoping to plug with my Fringe shows?

Absolutely, yeah. That's very kind of you. No, no, no. I look forward to hearing more about them. I won't be in those cities, so I can't see them. That's right.

You'll have to just hear about them. Yeah won't be in those cities, so I can't see them. That's right. You'll have to just hear about them. Yeah, pretty much, yeah. What, do you have something coming up in July, August? You want to plug? No, you know, I'm just doing the, just hanging out in LA and doing shows around there. But I don't really, I don't remember what I have. Just like, it doesn't make a difference, right? Well, but you have this new podcast.

Yeah, yeah, that's, yeah, That thing that brave new warriors kind of be, it's going to be kind of like a lot about, you know, the future and technology and where we're going and, you know, uh, interviewing spooky stuff. Yeah.

Yeah. But you know, I'll keep it fun. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You'll be like, uh,

the black mirror of a podcast. Yeah. It'll be like a funny black mirror. Oh yeah. Like black adder. You've nailed it. Both have the word be like a funny black mirror. Oh yeah. Like black adder. You nailed it. Both have the word black. You got that right.

And where can people find you online? Alex Nussbaum in every way. Across the board. At Alex Nussbaum on Twitter, Instagram, you know, alexnussbaum.com. You got in there.

What about Snapchat? Are you on the Snapchat? You know, one day. Are you? No. Graham's phone doesn't you on the Snapchat? You know. One day. Are you? No. Graham's phone doesn't do that. Yeah, my phone's too old.

It won't let me do a lot now. That's a good way to do it. And thank you all out there for listening. If you like the show, you should head over to MaximumFun.org. Check out the blog recap. Pictures and videos of things we've talked about on the show today i don't know if we'll be able to find that fast and furious scene oh you if i can find it i'll send it to you okay uh if i can find that what the sears

picture what the sears I can't believe that that's something that I mean how many levels does it go through before

I only went through one draft I'm sure with princess yeah I don't know what the sears yeah who cares

we'll all be out of a job soon anyway and if you like the show please tell your friends or go leave a review I don't know. With the Sears? Yeah. Who cares? We'll all be out of a job soon anyway. And if you like the show, please tell your friends or go leave a review on iTunes and come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. MaximumFun.org Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Listener supported.