Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 588 - Kelli Ogmundson

Episode Date: June 24, 2019

Comedian and actress Kelli Ogmundson returns to talk about being related to Bork, ‘90s music videos, and driving a Tesla.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 588 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who I think you'll agree with me when I say, man it's a hot one. It's like, I don't know, six inches, eight inches. Somewhere in there.

Somewhere in there from the midday sun. Yeah. What would be the next line boy we did it my spanish my Spanish man oh man he wrote that he wrote that it didn't come pre-written

it wasn't like Santana said hey I wrote this song come be on my song that I wrote not a lyrics guy more of a guitar noodler and shoe designer yeah that's right award winning And shoe designer. Yeah, that's right. Award-winning lady shoe designer.

Carlos Santana. Our guest today, returning guest to the podcast, very funny comedian and actor, Kelly Augmanson. Hello. Hello. Hi. Thank you for coming back on the show. Thanks so much for bringing me back. Oh, our pleasure.

Oh. Come on. My pleasure. Okay so much for bringing me back. Oh, our pleasure. Oh. Come on. My pleasure. Okay. All right. All right. Please. All right.

Let's get to know us. Okay. Get to know us. Kelly, what's been going on? It's been about a year. Yeah. Yeah. What's going on?

What's shaking? Yeah. What's shaking with Kelly Ogmanson? Just like some major ups and some major downs. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let's go. Let's start with the middles. With the middles?

Yeah. What? I live a fine life. Okay. My relationship with my family is good. That's nice. Nice middles. Tell you what, that's an up.

Yeah. That's a big up. You know what? I'm very lucky for that. Yeah. to your family yeah yeah to all the augmentsons yeah yeah we're all related fun fact what all the augments all the augments oh really it's one of those uh like erica sigurdsson is the same thing it's like every Sigurdsson is related to. Yeah, if you're Icelandic, you're all kind of related anyway. Have you been to Iceland? Yes, but like

12 years ago. Okay. When I was a teen. So I'd like to go back now. Meet some Ogmondsons. Meet some meet some family members.

I was having. So you can't date another person named Ogmondson. No, no. Oh, tough. That's tough. I dated a few Shumkas in high school. I was having... So you can't date another person named Doc Winston? No. That's tough. I dated a few shumkas in high school. But you like

playing at Fast and Loose with rules. I didn't look at any paperwork. But you did like their dancing. We're like whirlwinds. There's a dating app I think in Iceland that's, don't date your cousin. Don't tell me how to live, Iceland.

It's like how far apart distant related you are. Wow. Yeah. I was having lunch with my mom, and she was like, you know you're related to Bork. And I was like, I'm sorry, what? And she was like, Bork. And I'm like, I don't know what you're saying. Bork from the Swedish chef, Bork.

And I was like, what? She was like, the singer, Bork. And I was like, you mean Bjork. You can't even pronounce it. You idiot. What kind of career would she have had if her name was Bork? Bork. Mostly silly songs about spaghetti.

I mean, I feel like she's not taken that seriously as Bjork. But she, you know, her songs are very serious. Yeah, she's as successful as an avant-garde pop star as you can name Yeah That's true Who's more avant-garde than her? Laurie Anderson Laurie Anderson, yeah

There we go, full list One, two So your family's A-okay That's enough We count that as a win We count that You just found out your cousin's a-okay that's enough we count that as a win we count that cousins of you just found out

your cousins with Bork sixth cousins don't date Bork don't date Bork I tried she was like get away from me that's what she sounds like

yeah she's like oh no no I don't know that's pretty good thank you yeah

like for an on the fly impression that was really good thank you unless that's something you'vethe-fly impression that was really good thank you unless that's something you've been working on that part of your snl packet that's my audition packet it's just me going oh no uh yeah uh i was on a television show which was great you were on cavendish on cbc's cavendish you should everyone in canada should still watch it on cbc jam yeah It's still a great show. It is really funny.

Yeah. It is funny. You were great on it. Thank you. I had a lot of fun working on it. And I got to live in Halifax for two months. How was that? The best.

It's very lovely out there. They didn't shoot it in Prince Edward Island? No. Oh. That's kind of funny. A few days they did, but it's really expensive, I guess, to film out there. shoot it in Prince Edward Island? No. That's kind of funny. A few days they did, but it's really expensive,

I guess, to film out there. So we, I think the episode where they went to Charlottetown was when they actually filmed out there and then they did a couple. Were you in that episode?

No. Oh, well, that one's really funny. The one episode I'm not in. But yeah, it was a lot of fun and it was very beautiful out there and i you know people are very kind and the nightlife is crazy and no what about the nightlife was crazy

because i've been to halifax did you say nightlife was crazy or just life is crazy no nightlife really well here's the thing is i say that but i I like went out one night. Yeah. You love the nightlife. You like to boogie. I love to boogie. I'm just not exactly a fun human. So I was like. I disagree. I'm having a lot of fun right now. Oh, thanks. But yeah, they just have like late night bars.

They, you know, they go open till like three something or three something. Yeah, whenever you're done. It's only like till 328. Yeah, like nine you're out. But, you know, whenever you're done. It's only until 328. Yeah, you're like, now you're out. But you know, people get super drunk. We were out at a bar and a man just like

approached, well, one of the guest stars on episode five and was like, you're wearing a pink shirt, huh? You're gonna walk in this bar

in a pink shirt. Tried to fight him and then ended up just rapping at him. Man, that's, I'd rather be punched. Yeah. We were all just like uh we need to leave yeah yeah oh this guy wrapped us right out of the bar pink shirt

drink skirt oh boy yeah i like it when a rapper midway through goes, oh boy. Pulls on his collar a little bit. Panicking. Did you, on that late night venture, did you go to Pizza Corner? No. Do you know, did you ever go to Pizza Corner? No, is that the place with the... It might, I think it's less of a Pizza Corner these days, isn't it? Isn't it?

No, I was just there. Oh, really? Yeah, there's Donair and pizza. Yeah, yeah. But that's always been it. But there's like four places all on one intersection that all the drunks go to. How fun.

Yeah. No, I just went home and I ordered like Skip the Dishes like every other day. Nice. And I just am a little bit shy. So I was like not out and about with everybody until the very end. Yeah. Yeah.

That's very responsible of you, you know? You're at your hotel. You're learning your lines. Yeah. You're staying in character all the time. All the time. I was a Brit constantly. Just walking around.

You're a character who could have been hungover, though. Like you definitely could have shown up hungover and people would have been like, whoa, she's really bringing it today. Yeah. Anytime I gave any energy, they were like, can you just bring that down? You're just, like, being too much. Your character was a goth teen, or 20-year-old. 20-year-old, yeah. She was originally supposed to be a teen, but when they cast me, they were like not a teenager yeah i look young but you do look young yeah but you're not a

teenager and that's fine that's great i you know what the world world has enough teens everywhere i look fucking teens kill them all no no no but they're just we have enough i think we're at a good level of teens yeah okay you know, okay. You know, like, it's like, if you're thinking of staying a teen, don't. Don't do it.

And if you're thinking of becoming a teen, think twice. If you're thinking of body swapping with a teen, I'll allow it because then that doesn't add more teens.

No, yeah. Yeah, yeah. But it does add a lot of hijinks. Because I don't remember any chemistry and I got a boner in class. It's funny how many times they've remade that premise.

It's the best. It's the top premise in movies. It is. There's like, you know, 17 again. That's the only one I'm thinking of right now. There's Fre, you know, 17 again. That's the only one I'm thinking of right now. There's Freaky Friday. Freaky Friday. And 13 Going on 30.

They did two Freaky Fridays, right? Yeah. Because there's one with Lindsay Lohan in it. Yeah. Wait, is 13 Going on 30, she goes... Reverse. A 13-year-old becomes a 30-year-old. Right.

She becomes Jennifer Garner and she does the Thriller dance. Yeah. And then there's one with... Is itiffany haddish one that just came out no it's um uh it's a ray and so it's called big or little it's called the opposite of big yeah but that kind of like will make a an adult a kid or a kid an adult. That that just like something about that tickles the studios like, oh, we haven't done that in a year or two. There's Purple Rain, he does it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Chairs of Fire. Most movies are about body swapping. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Spotlight was about body swapping Yeah, yeah, yeah Spotlight was about body swapping So you were on this show Yeah And how long were you out there filming? Two months

Wow Yeah That's a long time to be away Yeah, and it was, you know, on the opposite side of Canada And I'd never been out there, so that was really cool And I was the onlyouver person on that show so yeah i uh i didn't get to go back home some sometimes some people got to go back to toronto for a weekend or so like kathy's daughter like was going off to college so she got to go out there and send her off to college and And actually, Kevin, who played the dad on the show, Kevin Eldon, got to fly back to England for like five days.

I think it's easier to fly to England than it would be to fly to Vancouver. It absolutely is. My travel was longer than his. That's great. And I think more expensive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So I just stayed.

Nova Scotia is closer to old Scotia. Yeah, the, yeah. Yeah. So I just stayed. Nova Scotia is closer to old Scotia. Yeah, the original Scotia. But so, yeah, you had to stay out there the whole two months. Yeah. Yeah. Did they put you up in a nice digs? Yeah, I had like a little condo of my own. It was, you know, much nicer than my little apartment out here.

But it was really nice. And did they pay for all your skip the dishes? No, I paid for all my skip the dishes. I did. I lost money out there. It is expensive, right? It really is. But when you're too scared to go to restaurants alone, which I've outgrown recently.

Oh, you can also just get takeout. Yeah, I know. Yeah. But why were you scared of going to a restaurant alone? Because I don't really do that. The last time I was on this podcast, I said I'd never been to a movie alone. I did go alone finally. I just, I don't know.

I'm a nervous guy. Sure. A nervous guy. Okay. All right. Well, yeah, I haven't been to a movie with a person in a very long time other than a child's movie with a child. But, yeah, I go alone to movies all the time now. And it is nerve-wracking.

People harass you. You get beaten up all the time. Oh, okay. Yeah, they try and steal your candy because they know you don't have any backup. Like, nerd, nerd, nerd. Yeah, if you leave your jacket under your seat when you go to the bathroom, it's gone. Come back, somebody's sitting in it wearing your jacket. Yeah.

I love eating by myself. Love it. Yeah. Yeah. Go into a restaurant and just, you know, with a book or just my phone. And just, you know, spend a little quality time on Twitter and eat some noodles. Why not? Oh, yeah.

So you do it now? I do that now, and I love it. I do like it. Yeah, with a book. I had a server the other day. He was like, it's my first. You're my first table ever. And I thought, like, maybe I would get something out of it.

But instead, I just got awkward banter and, like, a nervous man. Table ever in any? Any restaurant. He was very young. He looked young. He could have played. He could play a teenager. Yeah, in any. Any restaurant. He was very young. He looked young. He could have played. He could play a teenager. Yeah, he could.

All right. Yeah. I remember we used to, Abby and I used to go to Boston Pizza in Victoria. And our server there, more often than not, was this, we called him 12Z because he looked 12. And like literally was a minor. Yeah. He had a little helmet on with a light on it. Come on.

Come on, let's have some fun. He served me a canary, a dead canary that died of coal poisoning. Yeah, there it is. I don't know what kills canaries. I don't know, but yeah, it's definitely coal poisoning. Too much coal. Not ideas. Birds eat nothing but coal for the past 12 months.

Breathing coal fumes. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And is that the first time that you've ever, like, had a part over the course of a TV show kind of? Yeah, yeah. I've only like reoccurred on My Little Pony a couple times as the same character. Right. And then they'll bring me back for a different character.

But yeah, that was the first time ever. So it was a big deal and very exciting. Yeah. I loved the episode where we got to be goths, like when we changed the Coven episode. It was like so much fun for me because i got to live my like i was such a wannabe god you want to be a goth uh yeah i did a lot when i was in like when i was like 11 or 12 i that's a young that's young for a goth i was going through emotions i like had struggled in school for the first time,

and then I just was like, you know what? Fuck it. Yeah, cauldron. Got real into cauldron. I'm really into eyeliner, and my teacher come up to me and be like, oh, I noticed that you're experimenting with eyeliner these days. It was ridiculous. And that year I went to my first concert ever, and it was a Green Day concert.

And I had to go with my dad because I was 12. What did your dad think of Green Day? I think he wanted to go home. Did he bring a book? Yeah. That's a very, very funny image of Ed Augmentson reading a book. We went to a Cure concert a couple years ago

and there were like and it was the opposite sort of like the grown-ups were fans of this goth music and their 12-year-old

daughter was there reading a book. Like it was out in a park. Yeah, yeah. But it's just so funny that the kid's like I'll come along

but I'm bringing this book yeah i want to know what uh what happens in these hunger games yes um what now did you have goth friends no no i was like alone god i think i was i is this what maybe has made you afraid of doing anything alone probably i like i so desperately wanted to be different from everyone and like stand out and not in a positive way i guess like i just wanted to be edgy and badass and anytime any of them tried to do the same i was like you're trying too hard but you know who was trying the hardest me you lone goth me lone goth lone goth slash punk yeah okay yeah i think punk was what i wanted

but i was like you know listening to avril lavigne well sure that's the good that's the gateway most people get into punk it's through avril lavigne and like green day's american idiot tour yeah yeah yeah um because she wore a tie without a collar she wore a tie without a shirt that's right yeah like a t-shirt she wasn't naked she was like fully naked just a tie in canada she was fully in the states they superimposed the tank top she had some experiments with eyeliner oh boy yeah yeah i think we all did during those days um how do't know how to use it. Yeah. Did you ever... Eyeliner? Yeah.

Were you ever a goth comedian? No, but I tended towards the punk thing, but there was no makeup element to the punk. I dyed my hair a few times. Oh, yeah, me too. I had some black hair. I had some black hair. I had some horrible orange hair that like came out of a semi-permanent foam dye kit that my friend and I did in my upstairs bathroom and ruined all of the sinks. Yeah.

And like we came to school next day looking like Ronald McDonald. It was horrible and patchy. And I had my mom give me streaks in grade six. Like streaks, not highlights. Like Kelly Clarkson, season one of American Idol. Yeah. Four peanut butter colored streaks on either side of my head. It was a luke. It was a luke.

And to this day, I still don't know how to dress myself or do my hair, but it was a tough time. This is my favorite thing is sometimes a goth will have to go to a family wedding or something like that. And then they will forever, that period of time will be immortalized in a family photo that's hung up in the house. will be immortalized in a family photo that's hung up in the house. I went to a wedding like 10 years ago, and one of the people in the bridal party was a goth. And it was the best. Every photo was so funny.

It was just like a lot of tall, buckly boots. Yeah, she had a lot of piercings and like just crazy like you know the overdoing it on the yeah the uh eye makeup and stuff it was great it was great and you know that phase probably lasted just just long enough for that wedding to happen and then maybe like she maybe six months later got out of it you know yeah oh yeah I wish I was at a funeral instead of a yeah I would fit in more well gods just love death oh they love it

they love it they love it the so and then the show the show sadly is no yeah we didn't get a second season

so that's a down is that the down that's a down that's the big or did you bring another down the big down we don't have a second season so that's a down is that the down that's a down that's the big or did you bring another down the big down we don't have to

talk about all my downs oh okay you're wearing a big down vest yeah I came in with a down comforter I'm just napping

in the corner yeah no that was yeah a major down I was pretty disappointed I wanted to bring so much more to the table with her. Well, I'm writing fanfic.

Good. Yeah. I want to know what a Cavendish fanfic. I looked it up. I honestly did because there's fanfiction for everything. Even I think when Picnic Face had a show, there was like weird fanfic about it. Sure. And so I was like, maybe, about it sure and so I was like maybe

but no not that I can find just wait people were probably waiting to see if it got renewed yeah like well now

that it's not I guess Brynn meets the tall Frankenstein also you know what don't be afraid to get that that wave

yeah you start the wave and then let it just I think we're ready for a Brynn movie yeah yeah that would be the best if just like just a character You start the wave. I think we're ready for a Brynn movie. Yeah. That would be the best if just like,

just a character from a show just morphed into, like now it's just a movie about that character. A TV movie. CBC. Please give me a job. I lost my job. And a lot of people lost their jobs and then i think that that was the eye-opening thing like when i find out my shows get canceled that i like i'm sad but then i don't

really know how hard it is to just legit lose a job yeah yeah losing a job sucks yeah yeah yeah so looking for a gerb yeah but you uh you're like always performing. You're performing in a musical a couple, how many months ago? Kids musical? Yeah, like three months ago. It was funny to go from Cavendish to Elephant and Piggies. We are in a play playing a pig. Welcome to Canadian Showbiz, baby.

Just playing a pig. Yeah, not even the best pig in the show. No, the best pig in the show. No, the best pig. Piggy. It was only, I will say, because it's just Gerald the Elephant and Piggy the Pig. And then there's three gals who played squirrels. It was cute. It was very fun.

Kids are brutal. Yeah, that's what I was going to ask. What is it like to do a show that's not like, hey, kids, I's what I was going to ask. Like, what is it like to do a show that's not like, hey kids, I'm going to teach you about smoking. Yeah,

that's how you do it. Like, you're just doing a narrative show. What are the kids doing? Are they insane? They're getting up, they're running around,

they're trying to get on stage. There's like a beautiful song kind of at the end of the show where they realize the show's ending and they're like, they sing this lovely song and we're sitting on the edge of the stage

and this kid is just trying to get on stage with us. And then there was another day where a kid just like was screaming the whole time like I don't want to go and I guess the mom was like, we have to leave it. Ran over, like we have to go. And so it was just, it's a lot of that.

One day there was a kid like, second line of the show went I don't like this I want to go and then for the rest of the show was just like

I want to go so loudly he was a reviewer from the kids time from the kids time so he was like yeah I'm taking Margo

to Matilda yeah on Sunday and I'm fully prepared to leave intermission yeah yeah yeah that's fair that's fair yeah i mean hey how you feeling this no okay okay but i feel like is matilda's uh is multi-generational right like it's been around a long time so there will be people who are there like nostalgically yeah oh the stories that's yeah i'm gonna go tomorrow and i think that's kind of why yeah but i think

there will be other like adults whereas with this show it was all children children and and elephant and piggy the books are like huge amongst children right now so like to them you're these like actual characters except for at the question period at the end we had a question you did a question So, like, to them, you're these, like, actual characters. Except for at the question period at the end, we had a question. You did a question period? At the end of every show. And, like, they'd be like, they'd be like, um, why are you not animals? Why didn't you wear face masks? And, like, things like that actually during one of the shows uh in

the front row the kid there's like one girl and you know she's just like kind of a bitch she turns to her friend she's like she's not really a pig and first of all i was like thank you but uh and then she turned to the other person. She's like, he's not really an elephant. Like, these kids were stupid if they believed it. Yeah. I was like, you, ma'am, are. Santa Claus doesn't exist. This whole thing is a sham.

Yeah. I thought we were going to see a real pig and an elephant. Oh, I mean, that show would get out of hand very quickly. Oh, very quickly. Yeah, we had. You know, he's not a real American idiot. Yeah. The, we had. You know, he's not a real American idiot. Yeah, the questions were great. One kid just was like, hey, how much does it cost to like put on something like this? Kid's writing his own play.

He's like, okay. We're like, I don't know, lots of money. Do you all do this professionally? Was another question we got. Is this your job? And I was like, yeah. For now. Oh, yeah.

How old are you guys? Are you guys kids or adults? And Tom, who played Gerald, is 70. I was like. I'm an adult. He's like We're adults Oh wow Yeah

So it was Adorable I love that there was A question period Every play should have A question period Every show Yeah every show

We did 12 shows a week Really Yeah Wow Exhausting When we went to see Peppa Pig live It was

Was it a real pig It was a real Like Oh mascot Like yeah Like a mascot costume And It They had a it was was it a real pig it was a real like oh mascot like yeah like a mascot costume and it

they had a they didn't have a Q&A but they did have a VIP package where you could meet them yeah did you do it no Dave did

but Margo stayed there she was like I'm above this she read a book Dave's getting his pictures just like um wow

12 for how many weeks did that uh 5 weeks holy cow that's 60 shows yeah it was a lot

oh man um uh yeah it was it was very tiring uh they're only hour long shows but I only left the stage for

3 and a half minutes every show. To barf. To barf. To drink so much water and to have an emergency pee. Yeah. Which happened almost every show. Is it, because I wonder about, like, people who are performing in a show where it's the same exact show every day. Yeah. Do you ever get lost? Like,

like you're, you're like, Oh shit. Like where I've been on the autopilot ish a bit. Yes. Has this already happened yet? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Especially if you're like you're, we start, we do shows Tuesday through Sunday. So if you're like on a Friday, your second show, you're like, I don't know who I am anymore and what's going on.

And yeah, it was, and it's, you know, it's not heavy material, but it still is a lot of energy. And there's lines. Do you ever get that way with standup? Yeah. If I, especially if it's one of those multiple show nights, I'll worry that I've already said a joke twice. Yeah.

In a set. And then I'm like, was that earlier or later? And then you realize you're doing that math and you're still talking. And you're like, oh, what's coming out of my mouth? Yeah, that would happen. Yeah. The good thing about live theater or whatever is it always changes. And there's always some sort of accident, some prop break, something happens.

Somebody's got bronchitis. You just go with the flow yeah somebody oh my gosh one of our our squirrels fell down the stairs like the second show oh boy like there's uh stairs on the set and she just bailed down the whole thing and then we just had to keep going because it was my big song anyways Anyways, that squirrel's dead. I was like, anyway, she broke her leg. Anyway, you. Two squirrels left. No more squirrels jumping on the bed.

All right. Have you been in a lot of musicals? Yeah, quite a few. I went to school for that. I went to school for musical theater. Oh, wow. Yeah, and I. You don't remember from last time? Yeah, I talked mostly about that. I went to school for musical theater. Oh, wow. Yeah. You don't remember from last time? Yeah, I talked mostly about that.

I listened to it after and I was like, oh, that was boring. But it's interesting for us because we don't know this world. No, exactly. And also, I know that it's a lot of work, but it does look like a ton of fun. It is. Like whenever I see music. For the performers. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're like, I hate this, but I'm glad you guys are doing your, your, your dreams. Yeah. I went to a dance call for like an audition on Monday.

And it was like everybody in town who does musical theater was there. It was like a 60 plus like dance call. Wow. It was. And what is that? How does, how does that uh audition like do you have to practice a specific dance no you learn one in the room so you're 60 of us calling one person uh yeah it was it was rough uh yeah because yeah we're all just watching one person and then

we break off into smaller groups and then we have to do it in groups of five and just get through everybody. And we all watch each other. Wow. Yeah. That sounds very intimidating. Yeah. It really is. Because some people are like, they just are dancers, right?

And then some people are like actors who can move, which is like this one over here. Yeah. And, yeah, it was nerve wracking. I hadn't done one in a while too but that's great like like just even learning choreography just at a normal pace yeah insane yeah so you have like 20 minutes to like learn a dance i still haven't learned the single ladies dance you're working on it i am i am i watch the video. Yeah. You practice in the mirror. What part have you gotten up to?

The ring part. The ring part. Good. And then you lose focus and watch Lord of the Rings. Flip my hand back and forth. Yeah. That one. But yeah, I feel like even at my most on point, I'd be five steps behind.

And you know what? That's normal. Like people get lost. And the tough thing about this one is normally you get to do it twice. But since there were so many people there, it was like you got one. You got one shot, one opportunity. Oh, wow. It was like.

Lose yourself. Oh, my gosh. It was you versus Papa Doc. Yeah. It was like, lose yourself. Oh my gosh. It was you versus Papa Doc.

Yeah. And, uh, and obviously in my group, we were, you know, the group of movers, not dancers. And so I think we got a little lost.

Did they call you that movers? Okay. Movers. Well, they were like, okay, so if we call your name, it's cause we want to see you dance more because you know,

uh, we just, we want to see the dancers dance more. And I was not on that list no it's fine they were like not every part in the show has to dance so what uh do you know what was the show for was it just a general call let's see if you can dance yeah i saw you yeah i was auditioning for the musical the musical not a bad idea i have like a song in the middle with a guy who can't dance though like stumbling around yeah i can't do the wrong audition

i think that's just uh a chorus line yeah yeah uh that i saw that musical when i was a kid loved it it's great but i remember thinking it, I was like, if this is what it is really like to be in a musical, I want to know part of it. Seems so hard. Yeah, it is a lot like what it's like, except you don't have to come forward and tell your entire story. I would, though. In fact, I wish they'd rather. It's part of my process. You come forward, they're like, okay, next.

And you're like, excuse me, my name is Graham Clark. I grew up here. I knew I wanted to do this when this happened in my childhood. Which is like the entire premise of that show. Did you, was there, did you see a musical when you were a kid and you were like, I want to do that? No, my parents weren't, aren't like theater people, aren't into that stuff. They don't like theater. They don't like Green they don't like green day

oh boy yeah what do they like trying to peg them down they're very kind people you're very lucky to have such a great family you're very lucky

to have such a nice parent but when I was in like early high school I saw my friend do she was she always did shit like she was in

like programs and I went and saw her production of Bugsy Malone musical She always did shit. She was in programs. And I went and saw her production of Bugsy Malone musical. And I looked and I went, I could do this. Which was very confident for a 13-year-old. Were all the cast members also 13-year-olds? Yeah. You could have done it.

I could have done it. I was like, they're all teens and they're having fun. And I know I have some singing talents. And I had done like the middle school idol and came in second place. Oh, nice. What did you sing? Oh, Natalie Ambergli's Torn. Oh, man. I mean, just seeing a 13-year-old singing Torn, that's a day out.

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. So, yeah. And then I started doing that. At the same time, I started doing improv. What did the winner, do you remember what the winner sang? Okay, it was a guy named Thomas who would later dump me in front of the entire class.

What? In the finals? Yeah. Were you dating at the time? No, we had actually broken up before that but we weren't even dating i just stopped we kind of liked each other and then i stopped liking him and then he decided to like insult me in front of the whole class wow uh yeah it was pretty mean for especially for a guy who in high school like later this was middle school in high school would uh uh follow

me around at parties being like i'm I'm going to touch your boobs, which was his move. Which was his move. I mean, it's not a great move. It's not a good one. Let's not do it. We didn't know yet. Yeah.

I'm trying to think of what he sang. It was like, he had a, he had a, like a soprano voice. Yeah. Like, cause he was a small boy. Oh, I'm going to touch your boobs. Yeah. I'm a castrato.

I don't know what to do. Oh, I feel like it was some sort of Elton John tune or something. Yeah. Oh yeah. Well, hard to, hard to compete with the,

you know, the legend of Elton John. Yeah. Yeah. In the highest voice you've ever heard. Have you seen Rocket Man? No. Will you?

Yeah. Yeah, I will. You will? Okay. But, you know, is there any reason to go to the theater and see? Did we talk about how the guy who plays him, Taron Egerton is Rocket Man. He was in the animated movie Sing. And he sang I'm Still Standing. Maybe he sang another Elton John song too.

Oh, wow. He was the gorilla? Yeah. Oh. Why have I seen that? Yeah, I haven't. And he's in The Kingsman. And Elton John is in Kingsman 2.

He is? Yeah.man 2 he is? yeah yeah he is plays himself I think yeah he does I was on in the other room I saw it

I didn't care for it but yeah is this a conspiracy theory you're having? no I'm just like

what is like you're obsessed yeah I didn't know who who Taryn Egerton you're obsessed. Yeah. I don't, I didn't know who, who Taron Egerton was, but I know that he is rocking. Well,

think of Alden, Iron Rick. Yep. Thinking of him. And then subtract Antle Elgort. If you could play a musician in a biopic, both of you.

Ooh. You know what? I'll keep it nice and Canadian, and I'll say Stompin' Tom Connors. Oh, yeah. You'd shave for it? Yeah, I'd shave for it, and I'd do the... Because I've read his autobiography,

and I think he's a pretty unique character and fun to play. Ooh, fun. I would do Natalie Ambruglia. Perfect. And then the culmination scene is her watching 13-year-old you. And being like, eh, I give up. Okay. Well, she.

I give up. I think it would be interesting to have, like, show her at her height when Torrin's, like, huge, and then, like, she didn't have any... Have you heard the original version of that song? No. It's by a band called Edna Swap, who I once saw open for No Doubt.

Ooh, fun. And Weezer was on the bill as well. And... Was it No Doubt and Weezer if we have time? Yep. as well and uh was it no doubt and weezer if we have time yep uh and this uh and she had like a squeeze box on stage the lead singer of edna's what but the like the fact that natalie and brulia could get a hit song out of that recording is remarkable yeah yeah it's it's like just the most sort of sparse, weirdly. Like there's just a one kind of electric guitar that's going slowly along with it. Yeah.

Yep. I wonder what it's like to have had a hit. And then, but like definitively know that that was your one hit there's not gonna be you know yeah like it was

however long ago 10 years ago or she must have had another song I think she had other songs but they weren't hit of course

yeah but I can't even think of it I can't even think of her what her album would have been called would have been called Torn yeah I feel like it was born can't even think of her what her album would have been called. Would it have been called Torn? Yeah, I know. It was born under

it was flakes of You know. Oh boy, what was it? I'd love to see her come back now. She was married to the lead singer of Silverchair. If that's worth anything. And I remember a member of Silverchair

worked in a record store in England and then got fired because too many people came in asking for his autograph. Oh, yeah. Natalie Imbruglia. We're getting there. Well, Carrie, what musician would you play in a movie? Oh, boy. Mariah Carey?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the one. Mimi. Her number one song on Spotify is Torn number two song Torn

Acoustic the song the album was Left of the Middle Left of the Middle yeah oh and the follow up single was Wishing

Wishing I Wishing I Wishing I was there oh yeah oh yeah alright yeah yeah okay I read a review was Wishing. Wishing I, wishing I, wishing I was there. Oh, yeah. Oh, okay. All right.

Yeah, yeah. Okay. I read a review of a guy who went to a Spin Doctors concert last year, and he said he wrote the review of how to put on a great show when you only have the one hit. Sure. And it was fascinating. It was fascinating. They had three really good singles on that album they had four really good songs yeah pocket full of kryptonite uh jimmy olsen's blues that's the

same song okay uh little miss can't be wrong this can't be wrong what time is it all right yeah and uh two princes yeah and the the review was like very glowing, but it was like, you have to structure a show such that you play the song that everybody's there to hear and that you somehow squeeze in new stuff and also like-

You promise to play that song again. If you like that, we're closing with it too. Yeah, yeah. That's the encore. But yeah, I wonder what it's like to have that one hit and just be like, yeah, we're still going to tour. We still enjoy being musicians.

Yeah. We're not going to quit just because we had one hit and then no other hits. I guess it's just true to the point where like this still pays better than a regular job. Yeah, absolutely. I think when I saw Green Day, I think Jimmy Eat World opened for them. And I only knew the middle and was only hyped for that song. And then the rest was like sitting down talking to my dad. The rest was left of the middle.

Dave, what's going on with you, man? Speaking of music of this era. Here we go. I recently discovered that we get, because we have all these music channels that are just, they play on our TV cable package. They play music with no visuals. Like there's an 80s channel and a 90s channel and a country channel and all these

like a dozen or more music streams that i've never listened to yeah stingray stingray music sure and there's no way to not have them i think they're just lumped in with you but i i don't know if this has always been around, but I recently discovered they have three all video channels that are like one is, well, they have no ads.

They have no other programming other than music videos. They got VJs? They don't have VJs. Duh. They don't have any. It just goes

music, music, music, music, and then station identification. Cool. That's terrible. They have one hip-hop channel, one metal channel, which that's not the second most popular kind of music, and one retro channel.

And so you got to be watching the retro. I've been watching the retro. And the metal channel on weekends does like 90s alt rock. Nice. 90s and 2000s alt rock. So you've just been like revisiting all the great videos. I recorded it. Yeah.

A four hour block of it. And I've been rewatching so much and it's like been feeling very nostalgic. Even things where I was like, at the time when it was being played on much music, I was like, why is this song being played so much? Like the Depeche Mode song, I Feel You. Do you remember that video? It's black and white. Anyway. Sounds moody.

It was. But I just remember being like, this is on all the time. I don't know. I don't know anyone who likes this. Now, of course, i know people who do but yeah as a 13 year old i'm like why um i was thinking about that very thing the other day what like because that used to be that used to fill up so many hours of the day just watching music videos it's like plunking myself down watching whatever music videos they decided they were going to play. Me having zero say in it. And now like kids,

I imagine they still do on YouTube, but they get to pick. Yeah. Like, okay, I'm going to follow up this video with that video. Yeah. Old Town Road.

Old Town Road. Old Town Road. Old Town Road remix. You know kids. You know kids. I know kids. I teach three to four-year-olds. They all love Old Town Road. Do they really?

No, not four-year-olds. No, not four-year-olds. Three-year-olds, though. Three-year-olds, though. But they were showing the Lenny Kravitz American Woman. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Starring Heather Graham

yeah that was from the Austin Powers 2 soundtrack yeah oh which was it all makes sense

to me now why Heather Graham was in that video but like she shows up in it and she's like the sexy

it's I don't know why it's an alternative video I hear it I hear this song every day when I'm shopping in a shopper's drug bar. Every day. Like, I literally.

The Lenny Kravitz either fly or American Woman are the most mainstream rock songs of this millennium. You're not rock. But she shows up in the video. Millennium. You're not wrong. But they, she shows up in the video and like, it's a good thing because she whips out some dance moves.

She like grabs her crotch and like points her fingers, grabs her boobs. But I was just thinking of like, gonna watch this video soon as I get home. What if she was a bad dancer? And they were like,

well, the star of this movie that your song is being played in is going to be in the video. Yeah. And she just shows up and does the funky chicken. Yeah.

They would edit around it. They would show a little bit just when she's going into the funky chicken and cut away. These music videos are cut so frenetically. Is she wearing

an American flag bathing suit in that? No. She's wearing I think she's wearing some kind of American flag top. Maybe it's an American flag top. I feel like there's maybe

like a mesh layer over top like a netting. What a wild year for fashion. How are they going to bring back mesh? I love it it was maybe fishnet yeah yeah

and or football jersey or pinny do you remember wearing a pinny at sports day I do remember wearing a pinny

at sports day whipping dodgeballs at her wearing a yellow pinny then at the end of the video she eats an orange slice she and Lenny Kravitz're in a yellow penny. Then at the end of the video, she eats an orange slice.

She and Lenny Kravitz were in a three-legged race. Lenny Kravitz could be in a three-legged race by himself. That's right. We all remember when that happened. A little egg and spoon. Oh, boy. Do you remember in sports day? We were driving past the school that Margo's going to go to. And I was like, oh, I think it's sports day.

Because there were so many kids doing organized organized things in the in the field do you remember the events i remember three-legged race egg and a spoon yeah sometimes uh oh what is they were all relays yeah like not that you know when you hold the legs and it's like a lawnmower oh um the uh there was one with like sponges and you had to dunk it. Yes. Dunk the sponge and bring it back to your end. And fill the water or the bucket. I remember throwing bean bags at things.

Yeah, bean bags through like a hoop or something. Like a corn hole. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or horseshoes. I remember one where everyone had to put their shoes in a pile. That's it? And then that pile was donated to... We all walked home without shoes.

Then you ran, when it was your turn, you ran up and put on your shoes and ran back. And I remember one guy ran up and kicked the pile and the shoes went everywhere. Yes! I love it, and that kid is successful today. Yeah.

He's an agent of chaos. Yeah. I love that. The other, yeah, so I was thinking about that and they also played, I think it's Bootylicious.

Oh, yeah. Speaking of songs from soundtracks, were they like, they have to mention Charlie, How Your Angels Get Down like that? Yeah, like that yeah yeah isn't that independent women oh maybe it's independent yeah yeah yeah you're right you're right bootylicious is they're trying on outfits with stevie nicks yeah that's exactly it uh what was uh what was your favorite music video do you you remember? Like one that you were like, oh, my God.

This is the one that I watched a bunch. Yeah, yeah. Or that you were super hyped when it came on. Like, yeah. Honestly, it was Bootylicious because I remember being babysat. And the cool girl who was like my mom's friend's daughter who babysat us, who is now that I look at it, only five years older than me. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Cool enough. Yeah. She would play it all the time or she would put it on and like dance with her butt and I was like, whoa. Whoa. Whoa, butt dancing? You would slow dance with her butt? In my house? Yeah, in my house. And like learning

about like shaking your butt. Yeah. It was super important to me. It is very important to learn how to shake your butt. Yeah. Yeah. Huh. Booty-alicious.

Yeah, I think so. Yeah. I did not know that was Stevie Nicks until I was somebody who knew about music. She was just the lady playing guitar in the music video? She was just like their mom, I don't know. Or an extra. An music. She was just the lady playing guitar. She was just like their mom. I don't know. Or an extra. An extra.

What was yours? I think, uh, speaking of Lenny Kravitz, I think the, are you going to go my way? That video was like, when I was like,

well, this guy's going to be the king of rock and roll for all time. As far as I'm concerned. And I said that as far as I'm concerned, this guy's the king of rock and roll. Uh, what a cool video. Yeah. It just made him an instant star,

as far as I'm concerned. How about you? Detachable Penis by King Missile. Fishheads by... Oh, yeah. Roly-Poly Fishheads. Yeah, by bill paxton um um no uh no definitely buddy holly by weezer oh yeah that was a great video oh man before that probably sledgehammer by peter gabriel oh yeah a lot of fun

yeah oh man music videos are the best yeah yeah um i was i was singing the christina aguilera all i want is you yep i've had that stuck in my head because that was on the retro channel oh the genie in the bottle one is also pretty good yeah yeah but in that one she says uh i'm not talking about your sexuality and it's, it made me feel like, it's very quaint that like, that was risque to just say the word sexuality. Yeah. And now songs are like,

like, I'm gonna whip you with my dick. I love that song. I changed my, that's my favorite music. I'm gonna whip you with my dick. Candy Shop by 50 Cent. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. That one was just like pornographic yeah yeah but that was still was that not still like coded in in metaphor yeah yeah yeah oh you know what all the things she said by tattoo oh yeah that one i remember being like shocking and watching it in private oh yeah yeah yeah did they kiss in it oh yeah they did. They did almost no lip syncing in it. Yeah, no, it's just all they hear in the rain and there's like fences all around them. That's right.

And it's like maybe they're in a private school and they're being kept apart or something. Yeah, yeah, I think that was it. But it was mostly them just making out. Also, they're not going to get us. I don't know the difference between those music videos. I don't think there was any. I think they knew what their audience wanted yeah and they were like we're not gonna

do an acoustic set where we don't make out all the things she said is still my favorite uh like microphone check technique at the beginning all the things she said all the things she said running through my head running through my head um so yeah i've been uh been watching a lot of vids nice yeah that's a nice that's nice fun nostalgic nobody gets hurt also the uh the video for glycerin by bush oh yeah well i don't know why the rest of the band showed up they're all they're they're in the background holding their instruments they must have known when they signed up with a hunky lead singer like that that they were gonna be set dressing yeah yeah but they don't like you can't even tell they're there until there's like a violin part at the end and the guitar player pretends to play his guitar as a violin and the director's like all right we'll

keep that okay there nigel What's up with you? A couple of weeks ago, I host a show every Monday at the Havana called The Laugh Gallery. Yeah. And after one of the shows a couple of weeks ago, one of the comics on the show offered, he said, do you want to ride home? And I was like, of course. Of course. I would love it. And he drove a Tesla.

Whoa. So, yeah. What? Yeah. I guess this guy does all right for a moment. Well, you know what? He's saving so much on gas. Yeah.

So, right away, I was like, because they don't have, it doesn't have a handle on the door. It doesn't have a steering wheel. Like, it's, you touch it. You touch it? Yeah. And I'm like, and I, like, right away, I was like, oh, this is. handle on the door it doesn't have a steering wheel like it's you you touch it yeah and i'm like and uh i like right away i was like oh this is this is something else this is like a whole other world and don't you dare close your eyes and uh have you been in one no you've been one

no it's uh like it is more futuristic than I thought it was. Like, just, you know, like when you see it, it just looks like a car. Like, read your eye scan. Yeah, read my eye scan. It's a get out. Yeah. I know what kind of future crimes you're going to commit. Oh, no.

I'm going to touch your boobs. Yeah, the Tesla chased me around a party. uh so the the first of all it can drive by itself which i didn't know like i i knew that like it better not but it you can but it can and so that that was right away the first thing he showed me he's like he's like so yeah just take my hands off the wheel and it like changed late like it knew it was crazy it was crazy oh man and it's got a computer screen like quite a big screen and it shows it like shows you like your car and and it shows everybody around you. It creates this kind of instant map of how many cars are behind you, who's beside you.

Oh, boy. Whoa. Yeah, so it's constant. Is it like the Star Wars chess game? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like, and then he showed me how it accelerates very fast, but it doesn't make any noise. So it's very weird. So I just can mow someone down.

But he was like, check it out. And kind of off of a light, you know, accelerate very fast. But you don't have that sense of like. Oh, yeah. So it's just all of a sudden it's like you're going so fast uh but it won't let like it'll it will it slow you down like it won't let you go too fast uh if you're driving it'll let you do whatever but yeah then it'll go i guess it'll go the. Can it stop at stop lights on its own? I, he didn't, uh, he didn't have his hands off the wheel at any of the stoplights, but he was just like, as we were driving, he's like, check this out.

And it just like followed the road. How many of our listeners do you think own a Tesla? I don't know. Maybe a few. Maybe a few. Maybe one. Maybe one's listening at a Tesla right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ooh. That's crazy. As somebody who has an L still. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Only still have my learners. I've had it for 11 years. Sure. You're a lifelong learner.

Yeah, I'm a lifelong learner. I'm trying to get my license this summer. I actually booked a test. You can do it. I can try. You haven I'm trying to get my license this summer. I actually booked a test. You can do it. I can try. You haven't been trying and failing. No, no. I just am just lazy and also sometimes scared of lazy drivers.

You're scared to drive alone. Yeah. Can't do anything alone, apparently. Too shy. Too shy. That sounds very intriguing to have somebody have a a car drive itself yeah like i didn't know that it could do that and uh the other thing is there's like a section that's like just like fun silly things that the car can do like like how a how Alexa can like, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Sing song lyrics or whatever. Yeah, so there's like one function that's called, uh, it's like, fireplace or something, and you put it on, and it's just the screen becomes like a fireplace, and sexual healing starts playing in the car.

Uh-huh. And then, there's another function where you can turn every seat into a whoopee cushion. How fun is that? That's very fun. That's very fun. Yeah. But, like, I guess I find it hard to imagine the owners of these cars are fun.

Like, that's what's surprising. Yeah. Although Elon Musk seems to think he's fun. And he's the guy who, like, put in the whoopee cushion function. Yeah. But it was like... When's the last time you used a whoopee cushion? And by used, I mean...

Did it just sit to fart? Like his bot or... I mean, I was pretty big on them as a kid. Yeah. They were the funniest thing. As an adult, the only thing i've ever done is a joy buzzer oh yeah joy buzzers because you shake a lot more hands as an adult than sit in seats and as a child oh that's true as a child if if a kid comes up and offers to shake your hand you're like what did you do to your hand i'm not shaking any kids hand no gross um but yeah that was it was crazy it was uh

it's the first time get one now yeah i'm gonna get one i've decided that's the car for me it's a funny it's got a sense of humor they were supposed to make like a more down market version. I thought so, yeah. And then it's been held up. Yeah. I mean if this is what cars are gonna be like it's insane.

I wouldn't have pictured cause you know I grew up in a car that had a cassette thing in it. So you know the didn't i grew up in like a car that had a cassette thing yeah so you know that the car is like making jokes that it's a funny that you can talk to it and say just drive me home and it'll just i'm so drunk yeah i'm so drunk there's something i've seen videos of they have something called insane mode which just goes so fast like it it, I don't know. Well, where could you even test that?

On the test track on YouTube? Yeah, there we go. So there is, there's just like something you can just say, go, go insane mode. It'll just go.

Go psycho. Turn down for what? It just goes so fast yeah it's uh but yeah it was crazy

I was so like uh I was so impressed like I don't care about cars I don't think

about them ever yeah yeah but being in a Tesla driving around I was like this is really neat. Yeah. Let's get Teslas.

Yeah, let's all get Teslas. Oh, yeah. I'll drive me. I don't need it. I don't need an N. Yeah, you don't need anything. I don't even need it. I'll just take care of me.

Oh, boy. Do we want to move on to some overhears? Or business. Or business. Stop Podcasting Yourself is brought to you in part by Squarespace. Oh, no. It's me.

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a comedy podcast about parenting. Whether you are a parent or just know kids exist in the world, join us each week as we honestly share what it's like to be a parent. These are really hard questions. They are really hard questions. I don't have any answers for that. I don't either. Sack of garbage.

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and remind you that you are doing a great job. Find us on MaximumFun.org, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Overheard. Overheard's a segment where, boy oh boy, if you hear something fun out there in the world and you want to keep it to yourself, wrong. Incorrecto. Yeah. You share it. you share it you share

it and we always like to start with the guest yeah kelly sorry i just had a a thought yeah yeah a memory uh the last time i did the show one of the people who called in with an overheard oh it was my friend really and i didn't realize because i wasn't listening to her say hi it's claire but i was like when I listened back to it, I was like, that is a human I know. So anyway. Well, let's see if we can get another match today.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fingers crossed. Yeah, so mine is an overseen. Yeah. And it's like just real cute. I saw coming around the corner, a big black dog who was off leash, which is, you know, not big black dog who was off leash, which is not always

great, but was off leash and a real confident walker and he in his mouth had one of those ball toss handles, you know the ones that you pick up a tennis ball and you can throw pretty far with, a chucket he had one in his mouth and then shortly after a small

black dog followed and had the ball in its mouth. Oh, man. I was like, are you guys on a date? And he's like, I'll throw the ball and you can go run and get it. It was like a very father and son looking thing. It was so cute. That's adorable.

So cute. What a caravan. Yeah. Oh, man. Although the purpose of the chucket is that you can pick up the ball without getting dog slobber on your hand. So you keep that out of your mouth. But you know what?

If the dog knows how to operate it, then you go ahead and then I don't have to touch anything. Yeah. If the dog knows how to operate it. Then I can just sit there and eat my ice cream cone. It's very good, yes. Thank you. You heard it. Yeah, it's very good.

Very good. Daveave do you have an over mine is i was uh having lunch with my daughters after swimming at a little cafeteria big appetite uh and this there were there were two maybe like a couple in their 60s and an older relative. Maybe they were in their 50s. And an older relative. And they were just having boring old people talk. And this woman was talking about going to the dentist. And how one time she had the hygienist

one time she had the dentist boring people talk yeah sometimes you get the bull sometimes you get the horns

sometimes you get the big dog carrying the truck sometimes you get the little dog with the ball and she said

that she was raving about this she was so impressed. Last time it was the dentist who cleaned my teeth. She was born to touch a mouth. Touch a mouth. Touch a mouth. That was the original title of Springsteen's Born to Run.

We were born to touch a mouth. Tramps like us keep your hands out of my mouth tramps born to touch a mouth oh I love that just let me caress it

a little bit yeah well you know what I've had a lot of dental procedures by people who definitely were not born to touch a mouth

so whoops a lot of questioning whether or not I floss. And I'm like, not crazy style like you do. Not getting in there. Not piano wire. Yeah,

exactly. Not like slicing a ham. Just right through your gums, like a ham. Like that video of somebody cutting watermelon with dental floss yeah one of those like yeah computer generated like goo being cut by a laser just like as part of a relaxation app yeah there's a there's like a performance artist i saw that he has he makes these uh kind of contraptions He does two styles of things.

Either he makes knives to pop balloons, so he'll make a contraption that's very complicated to pop a balloon. Oh, yeah, I've seen this. Or he'll make a thing that he pushes his head through and it's all spaghetti. Oh, yeah, I've seen those. Those are fun.

It's very fun. The sound. Break out that spaghetti. Oh, but just so satisfying. Do you have anything you imagine like doing like that? Yeah. He must have envisioned like setting up spaghetti. For me, it's a popsicle stick. Yeah.

I want to push a bunch of pins through a popsicle stick and make a comb. Dave, don't just dream it. Be it. Yeah. I think it would be too pointy to comb. That's true. You've got a lot of scalp. I'm trying to think of it.

um i'm trying to think of like i've always you know the the classic like uh to fill you know some kind of like a pool or something exactly perfect with like a jello or i watched a video of that the other day and then jump in it yeah they did it really yeah they like it went through a whole thing yeah like with the city over days like trying to get like get fill this i think it was above crown pool with uh with uh gelatin yeah and uh and they had to do it overnight layers and layers and layers but it was like crazy yeah yeah and i like wanted to get in there yeah yeah yeah yeah uh me also oh yeah um yeah i don't know there's a lot of those things that i'm like if if yeah i also have the opposite of like like an invasive thought that i'm like i need to stop thinking about biting a cheese grater yeah yeah yeah yeah biting a cheese i don't want to do it no it's like a

thing that gets stuck in my head wasn't it like i think think it was Jim Carrey had a bit where he's like insanity is as close as saying yes to the wrong impulse. And just like when you're shaving and just your brain's like, you know, you could just run that razor right over your tongue. Yeah. I think about that when I drink out of like wine glasses, how bad I want to just like bite it. Yeah. And just like shatter it. Yeah. of just like bite it yeah and just like shatter it yeah as a as an actress do you ever have you ever worked with like breakaway glass or candy on cavendish uh which kind of got cut but in episode

uh seven we had like linda cash on it the um wonderful linda cash she she goes flying through a window uh but it was her stunt double. And it was crazy. I got to watch the whole thing. And she, like, fell out of a quote-unquote window. We were in a set. And then onto some mats. But, yeah. Fun.

And we had to do it twice. Yeah, yeah. So they brought in another fake window. Yeah. Cool. Yeah. And I think there was a couple other things. I think there was Mark was supposed to break a window in like episode 2 and then it didn't

break and then they used that as like the joke but then he fucked up his hand they didn't put makeup on his like scabs well you know some people aren't lucky enough to have makeup on their scabs that's true have we done your overheard?

no no mine was a woman talking to her friend very matter-of-factly and said, I don't spend that kind of money on clothes. I buy all my clothes at Costco. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A real Kirkland girl. Kirkland makes a mean t-shirt.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some great exercise pants for the gentlemen. Yeah, sure. A cotton docker. Yeah. You got to get yourself a cotton blend pant yeah maybe this is the year yeah i just uh i yeah i just whenever i wear a cotton pant i'm just like who are you kidding who are you kidding man you know you can't do that nine to five no no

so breezy but yeah like um uh what I haven't been to Costco in a decade. So I don't know. I don't think I have either. Yeah, I've been a couple times, but I don't have the membership. Abby's mom has the membership, so we. Big family affair. I can't just go by myself. No.

Right. I'm too afraid. Too shy. Too shy. I'm opening myself up to the world speaking of cotton pants and the heat

it's the first episode of summer oh man we're pre-dabbing it in the spring yeah well happy summer happy summer

everyone hags yeah yeah now we also have overheard this is our summer goth episode yay I wore my sweater in the summer

Just for it I am wearing a summer sweater Yeah Looks great You look great Kelly Thanks guys I know you weren't fishing But

You look great I don't own a summer sweater Because that sounds like hell Now we also have overheard Sent in from people All over the place If you want to send one in you can send it in to Maximum Fun Sorry, stop podcasting yourself at Maximum Fun

SPY at MaximumFun.org Jeez Louise My brain's fried, that's what it is It's too hot Although it's nice and cool down there I never want to leave Well, you can stay Okay, I will stay

This first one comes from Ben in Toronto I was at a zine fair last month down there. I never want to leave. You can stay. Okay, I will stay. This first one comes from Ben in Toronto. I was at a zine fair last month. Didn't think we'd still have zines in this era of blogs. No way this fair was zine only. Oh, you think it was zine and zine adjacent? Yeah, people had their

microcomics and sticker books. I would love to put up my own sticker book. Why not? Yeah, why not? Yeah. You found your old one? Yeah, my childhood sticker book.

What was your jam? Oh, God. It was a lot of shiny animals and sharks and weird Canadian ones. So this was a sticker book where you just put in stickers that you found. I collected all my stickers, yeah, that I found. And it was like a photo album, and you would stick them on the photo album. And, you know, the thought was because of the backing, you could just like easily put it on other things, but you couldn't.

And, yeah. You had to learn a hard lesson. Mine, when I was a kid, were all the little kind of fuzzy animals. Yeah. Yeah. I liked a puffy. Yeah. Puffy sticker.

I had some weird ones where it was like, color your own. What? So they'd be like, a shoe. And then I like, markered and made it like, pink and purple or whatever. Well, I mean, that's a fun activity. Yeah. And my parents were like, just do this. Just do something.

Like, leave me alone. I wanted attention so badly. You're very lucky to have a wonderful family. Matt and Anita. Vanita, if you will. I was at a zine fair last month. I can't believe we still have zines. Yeah, it's true.

As I was walking through, there were two people walking behind me. One said to the other, when I was a kid, did I ever tell you this? My hands were so sweaty that paper would come apart when I touched it. Can you imagine? Here's my business card. But just as a kid, his hands were that sweaty? Yeah. Yeah, maybe it grew out of the...

Sending a note. Do you like me? Do you like me? Yes? No? Sweat. Smudge. Smudge here.

I do feel like, in general, kids are a lot sweatier than adults. Like, whenever I see a kid, I'm like, boy, you're sweating a lot. I thought you were going to say, kids are a lot sweatier these days. No, just that I feel like I wouldn't be shocked to see a kid trying his hands on his pants. Try him up on

his piece of paper. It's coming apart. But I feel like... I never had a hand sweat problem, but I had... I sweat problem but i had i definitely did i had sweaty i had sweaty hands like my face is my money maker yeah but also my i get sweaty face too but i remember my first ever boyfriend is that the guy from the middle school idol? No. Taryn Egerton? Taryn Egerton and I.

I remember because that was like all we did, right, was hold hands because we were just 14 or whatever. And it got real damp in there. Yeah, it got real. And like, you know, you wouldn't like address it until like after you're like, bye. And you like detached your hands and then like wiped them on your pants detach your hands detach your hands yeah uh uh this next one comes from ryan l in cincinnati ohio there was a i was at a music festival in denver and there was a gaggle of kids about 18 to 21 in front of me and all of them were wearing tie-dye and dancing. They were clearly high on something and all of them kept going over to an older woman,

probably in her 40s or early 50s, and telling her that they loved her and giving her hugs. The older woman, most likely one of the parents, had a hat that simply said, Molly rocks. Oh. So everybody was, yeah, yeah. Maybe she was the dealer she was molly yeah

um uh you know that that goes back to the whole bring your parent to a concert thing oh my parents would not supply me with drugs no but then would they hug your teen friends i feel like they'd get uncomfortable they'd be like okay yeah okay one short hug yeah leave me alone yeah would your parents your mama as a hugger she's a hugger yeah um but i don't think that i ever went to a concert with one of my parents. I don't. No, me neither.

I feel like I wasn't interested in concerts. And then when I was, it was a go solo. There were a couple of times my parents made my older siblings go with me. Okay. But that's about it. Yeah, I didn't have that either. Because it was like, I don't know. When I was a kid, I didn't have any musical tastes.

I was just like, I'll listen to whatever is on. And, you know, I'm not going to go to a Paul Simon concert by myself. This final one comes from Christina in St. Paul, Minnesota. from Christina in St. Paul, Minnesota. My husband and I were walking by the tennis court in our neighborhood park where a girl about seven or eight years old was playing tennis with her grandma. The little girl managed to get the ball barely over the net, but the grandma did not get to it in time to return it. The little girl said, Grandma, I thought you'd be better at this.

The grandma replied, Well, I have been holding back. Oh, no, yeah, you can't can't you go 100 or you go yeah yeah you gotta teach this kid this is what competition it feels like there's no taking your foot off the accelerator no no no this you can't even just hard aces every time yeah you're in my house yeah and if an opposing player gets injured you applaud oh yikes wow this is the most controversial thing happening in canada right now yeah and uh we're talking basketball guys at the time of this recording there are three games of sport left three games of sport one hockey and one or two basketball yeah and then that's it then we all take the summer off and we reconvene in the fall for sports And then we spend the next four months pretending

Canadian football doesn't exist Yeah In addition to overheards that are written in We also accept your phone calls If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631 That's one Ugh, SpyPod 1

Like these people have. Hey guys and illustrious... Do you know this person? Rob from Brooklyn. No. From the bathroom at school, not at the moment, but a moment ago. One guy goes to the other, bro, bro, bro.

How long are you peeing for? The other guy goes, and I'm not, I can't see them, but I hear the other guy say, dude, it's fine. I've got a process. It's all about feeling good, you know? That was all I heard.

Alright. Well, it isn't I have a process. It's all about feeling good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A process to pee. It's, well, I think it is a process, and you know, you've think it is a process and you know you've got to respect that process it's uh everybody has their own yeah and some of us shire bladders and others sure absolutely i've been told i pee really loud yeah just hits that water when people are like whoa whoa he's up yeah yeah hey man enjoy it yeah it's not it's not a rush i'm like

i can't control it yeah yeah um also it's it's it's from exception yeah here's your next one hey dave graham and probable hilarious guest this is eva from victoria with overheard. I worked in a bougie coffee shop that plays vinyl and we put the record cover for whatever's currently playing out so the customers can take a look if they'd like to. We were playing an Arctic Monkeys record and this guy came over, picked up the cover, flipped it over and studied it for quite a while before saying out loud to no one in particular, huh, like Green Day, but without the talent.

Wow. Shots fired. Wow. I'm a fan for this episode. Yeah. When you started talking about Green Day, I, oh boy, you should have seen my,

the dollar signs in my eyes. Finally. oh boy you should have seen my the dollar signs in my eyes finally it's like well that's all gonna line up I don't know that Green Day is overflowing with talent I always thought

that you know poppy catchy songs yeah and you know the one thing that you can't

you can't buy longevity exactly oh yeah I wouldn't have called it that you can you can't buy longevity exactly oh oh yeah i wouldn't have called it if you told me that green day would still be yeah yeah this is the band that's going to be around from 1994 forever yeah but they're still going yeah god bless them did a broadway show oh yeah how many how many bands from the 90s can claim that? One, I think. You too. Oh, yeah. Spider-Man Turn Off the Dark? Nope.

Oh, yes. Oh, man. There's a couple these days. I guess all the SpongeBob music was written by different artists. SpongeBob was made into a musical. Graham just saw Beetlejuice. Was it good? It was great. I want to see it. because SpongeBob was made into a musical. Graham just saw Beetlejuice.

Was it good? It was great. It was great. If you like Beetlejuice, I love the musical. I want to do it. Do it! I want to play, what's her name? The Winona Ryder part. Of course. Here we go. Here's your final bad boy.

Hey guys, this is Josh and Caroline calling in from Oklahoma. I'm calling with an overseen from the suburbs of Tulsa, driving to the neighborhood on Memorial Day, and we're headed out to do some shopping. And the neighbor's kid is about to mow the lawn, and he's using a hoverboard to push the lawnmower around his lawn. Oh, man. I can his lawn. Oh, man. I can just picture

Oh, I love that. picture me doing that and my dad coming up and being like, you're going to cut your toes off. Yeah. Yeah, either that

or you're going to go like slide off and go face first into the lawnmower. Oh, the future is now, guys. Yeah. But I mean, I'm less impressed

by the Tesla now. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, now that less impressed by the Tesla now. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, now that we've seen like Richie Rich mow his lawn. Richie Rich would have had a robot. Yeah, that's true. He had robots long before anybody else. Probably his butler.

He only had the one. Yeah. But like in Richie Rich world, he's not rich. His dad is rich. I thought he was rich because he was orphaned? No. No, he has a dad that skulks around. But he has to dress fancy.

Yeah, he wore a little tuxedo. Yeah. But with shorts. Yeah. Wasn't there a Kali Kalkin in the movie? Yes. And John Larroquette Was his dad

Or like someone Trying to steal the fortune No Oh the fortune Yeah who was the butler It's anybody's guess really Yeah Somebody who

You know Probably bought a house With that money Not a richy rich house though No Only one person Can afford that Scrooge McDuck

Just Swan diving Into a pile of coins. Or jello. Into an above ground pool filled with jello. I don't care how you do it. Just do it. I don't care if you have to do layers.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But if you're doing layers, can we have a layer of banana? Banana jello or just banana. No, my mom would put bananas on the top yeah or no maybe just mixed in i hated it yeah my grandma would make like yeah jello with fruit in it oh what is that called ambrosia salad well that's also with whipped cream with whipped cream yeah you know what anything that was a sugar delivery system yeah i was on put it right it right in there. I didn't like a chunk of fruit. I don't want anything getting too juicy in my Jell-O.

I do love plain Jell-O. Yeah. Yeah. I don't even need whipped cream. I'm like, just Jell-O. Haven't had it probably, honestly, since I was like a kid. Never did Jell-O shots, so skipped over that iteration. No, I've done it recently recently we have some in the pantry

if you want to make some yeah while you're staying here to stay cool yeah the uh it stains the carpet though it's the one like yeah it's full of coloring but i didn't expect that i think i'll just wait until whenever whenever i find myself in a hospital. Then I'll go. Oh, yeah. Then it's jello city. What's your favorite jello? Mine's green. Yours is what?

Green. Oh, yeah, green. It's a hard sell, though. Yeah. I think mine was red. Yeah. Classic red. I think I would go green, too, but I wouldn't buy green because not everyone would be on board with it.

Yeah. Everyone's on board with red. Red. Yeah. Or orange. Orange. Sometimes orange sometimes purple but but yeah definitely red now i just want to drink kool-aid someone bought a big bag of wine gums for the office the other day yeah and we were trying to name the flavors of them gin Gin. Well, they mostly taste like quote unquote wine. Yeah. They have a big, there's some overarching flavor to them, but there's like the black

ones. They're the best. Are blackcurrant. Yeah. They're not licorice. They're not licorice. Yeah. They're delicious.

I never got into wine gum. Oh, you gotta. I think I missed it. Oh, you think it's got animal in it? It's done? Yeah, I think it's done for me. But it's the same with Jell-O. I'll wait until it's hospital time.

Whenever I next find myself in the hospital, Jell-O, Jell-O me. Sir, this is an outpatient. Jell-O me. We're just giving you stitches yeah because you snitch oh boy

well that brings us to the end of the episode Kelly do you have anything that you'd like to plug yeah every Tuesday I do Little Mount Improv

at Little Mount Gallery yeah Thursday show at 8.30. 26th in Maine and Vancouver. You bet. Can't miss. Yeah, and if you haven't watched Cavendish, just watch it now.

Yeah. It's still good. Can anyone outside of Canada see it? Not now, and hopefully eventually. Travel to Canada. Yeah. Download the CBC Jam app. Yeah.

Yeah. You can also watch Pen15 on there and live hockey yeah travel to Canada go to Halifax where they shot Cavendish

go to Napanee the home of Everly the home of punk yeah Canada's

home of punk yeah the birth of punk. Yeah. I think, yeah, if you get one of those blockers, you might be able to watch it on the Gem app. Yeah. Yeah. And if you're an old person, blue blockers for your eyes.

You'll never figure out how to stream this thing in a different country. So just get some blue blockers and dig your own grave, you bag of bones. Buy me a Tesla. And Dave and I will be heading to Montreal. Montreal. Jus pour rire. Comme il va. Yeah.

It's July 26th. In a hotel. I'm hoping hotel boardroom. I'm hoping a business center. I'm hoping we can send a fax in the middle. People are using the printer. I think somebody downloaded something weird on this computer. Yeah, it wasn't me.

But it's going real slow now. But if you need tickets to, if you haven't printed off your tickets to get into our show feel free to use the business letter and thanks everybody for listening if you like the show please tell your friends to come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Illusions never changed Into something real I'm wide awake and I can see

The perfect sky is torn You're a little late I'm already torn No one in the band was like, that's really good, we should make it a big anthem. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, just keep like, that's really good. We should all, we should like make it a big anthem. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, just keep singing it sad. Maximumfun.org

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