Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 594 - Sophie Buddle

Episode Date: August 5, 2019

Comedian Sophie Buddle joins us to talk about opening for Stuber, The Bachelorette, and surviving in prison.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka, and he's Graham Clark, and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody, and welcome to episode number 594 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name's Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who looks great in a mustard shirt, Mr. Dave Shubka. It's a white shirt I spilt. I don't think I own anything mustard. You know. I mean, I own some mustard.

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, check your fridge. Yeah, I don't think I own much more than this shirt. Yeah. Maybe I think I have another shirt as well, but I sleep in it. Oh, nice. And I don't mix. Have hot dog dreams.

I don't have daytime and nighttime shirts. I can't wear the same thing. Once I sleep in something, it's out of the rotation. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah. So I make sure if I'm going to see the rotation. Oh, really? Yeah, so I make sure if I'm going to see a boring movie, I don't wear anything I like.

I guess I do have shirts that have been kind of designated as sleep-only shirts, but... Do you guys sleep in the dirt? Yeah, I sleep in the dirt, yeah. Yeah, I sleep in a trough with dirt in it. How often do you change your sheets?

I just changed mine, so I'm off the hook. When was the last time? Because I don't know how often you're supposed to, but every week? Yeah, probably. That's not even close. Or at least we're like, I don't even know if we have a secondary sheet what they should have is an invention that's like a uh an airbag that you just set in the middle of the bed and then you deploy it and it just stretches over the bed yeah automatically

oh boy yeah it's not even that it's not the cleaning i think the putting back together putting back together it's the taking off together, it's the taking off The layers What about Bath towels Oh that's in every That's every week I have no idea Yeah I like a fresh towel

Like a downy fresh towel And our guest today also loves a downy Is the voice of the downy teddy bear What's the Snuggles? Snuggles? What's the brand of fabric softener? Snuggie. Snuggie.

Our guest today, returning guest of the podcast. Yes, hello. The host of her own podcast, Obsessed with Sophie Buttle. I have been a guest on. You're an excellent guest. Thank you very much. It's Sophie Buttle. I have been a guest on. You're an excellent guest. Oh, thank you very much. It's Sophie Buttle. Hello.

Hello. So I'm having a wonderful morning. Okay. My feet have finally started peeling. Okay, let's get to know us. Here we go. Get to know us. So you're a rattlesnake.

Basically. So have you guys ever done baby foot? No, but I did. I mean, I was offered it at a club. You jumped in like you know what that is. I do know what that is because I was part of a conversation of a group of women all discussing that they wanted to try this product. Baby foot. Yeah.

Okay. No, I do bar method. So baby foot is you have these little, it's basically a foot mask. And then three to seven days later, your foot skin starts peeling in a pretty aggressive fashion. And I've been waiting pretty patiently for this day to finally come and pretty much yesterday it started but then today it's really starting to catch some speed so then the ultimate thing is that you get a real soft foot yeah but mostly you get to peel oh sure it's the peeling that's fine it's appealing okay and you're talking tops and bottoms or just the bottoms

um well wherever you have dry skin hard hard foot yeah i did it with my friend and she she's getting a lot of peeling on her toes she's been sending me a lot of feet pics okay for free can you yeah forward those along yeah to these lonely boys i'm getting a little lonely voice i actually i got into a youtube hole last night about about like different YouTubers that are selling feet pics and how to do it and how it's going. And people love it. People love to sell pics of their feet. I have socks on.

Don't look. I was looking just as I was looking. I'm not going to shed in your home. No, no. Oh, I guess. Yeah. I was more worried about what your feet looked like and what you could maybe get for some pics.

Well, that's what I was thinking. I was all stressed because I was like, there's going to be no market for my weird lizard feet now. Oh, no, don't sell yourself short. Can you? There's, oh, there's absolutely a market. If you could like have the entire molted husk of your feet, a guy would accept that in the Well, I've been keeping it in case that happens.

Yeah, exactly. So that's perfect. Yeah, just put it in a bubble mailer. Or fax it. Yeah, well, I always feel like if anything goes wrong, I can always fall back on selling feet pics on mine. Yeah. No daughter of mine is good. It seems like a world where nobody gets hurt.

Yeah, I know. It seems very wholesome. I feel like foot fetishes have always been kind of a punchline in comedy. But it seems very... But they're like the main driving plot point in Quentin Tarantino movies. That's true. And he's a good guy, so... That's true.

As far as we all know. Yeah, I mean, when he types the letter N on his Google suggests the N word. I just read a book called Everybody Lies and it's about this guy that used to be a Google scientist.

I think that's the title of his job. Okay. And his theory is that we can learn a lot about people from Google analytics because everybody lies on census things and regular surveys. But from actual Google Analytics,

we can tell what people are truly about. And one of the things was about the N-word and where it's Googled and how often it's Googled and what happens in the news before it gets Googled a lot. And he was using the actual word in the book. And then I looked at him and he's just this nerdy white guy. And I was like, I don't think you're allowed to write it either. Yeah, he maybe pasted it.

He Googled before he wrote the book. Am I allowed to? Yeah, I mean, I don't. You can definitely learn a lot from what people have Googled. Oh, for sure. I worked with a guy once and I went on his computer. I didn't do this alone. We were allowed to go on his computer, but it was his computer.

And when typed in the letter B, the suggestion that came up was bumps on penis. Maybe that's just the most Googled thing on the internet though we don't know no it was a previous search it was bumps on penis.com that's his main browser and then when you click on it was a picture of him yes i do For whose pleasure? Nobody. Maybe it's like a little French tickler. Yeah, wasn't there

something this week about like a woman who sold her bath water? Yeah, Bella something. Lugosi? Is that? Bella Thorne? Carolee? I'm out of Bellas.

Yeah. Bella something. She's like this weird, I think she's a Twitch star. Oh, yeah. And yeah, she's. She like sold bottles of her bath water and like a bunch of people got sick or something. Well, because a bunch of people were drinking that. Like a bunch of people got sick or something.

Well, because a bunch of people were drinking that. Yeah. It became a public health situation. Oh, boy. You guys should sell your bath water. I don't have a bath. Shower only. I guess I could sell whatever. Shower.

Drips off your body. Shower collectants. Locally sourced it is drip season you just had dino on right oh yeah is it we're right in the middle of drip season down uh i guess yeah i have a shower squeegee i clean off the glass and collect it into a jar perfect you guys can make a couple cents off that yeah a couple cents sure i. Yeah, a couple cents. Sure.

I mean, shipping internationally is going to kill you. Sure, sure. You're going to lose money in the long run and at the beginning. But that middle ground. But like, it does seem like a high time of that kind of thing. Selling, you know, like I think a YouTube celebrity could sell a clipping of hair or fingernail clippings or whatever for a good chunk of change. I mean, it's the one industry that AI can't really take over. That's true.

Unless you want robot bathwater. Could be their death bath, probably. Yeah. Yeah. But, you know, that's what makes it so valuable. Exactly. That famous robot you follow. But everyone's just trying to do stuff for $25,000 a jar.

So it makes sense. Sure. Yeah. I mean, shopping at Whole Foods. That's what a jar of mayonnaise costs. Am I right, everybody? Um,

so what's new with you? It's, it's been a matter of years. Her foot's falling off. Her foot's falling off. She has diabetes. She bought diabetes. So I'm doing very good.

I had a good year. I'm, here's the thing though. I'm always, comedy really knows how to bring you back down. So I had a very good year, got a new job, started a podcast, feet are peeling. You guys know I'm just on fire.

I'm feeling really good. But then I had to do my taxes a week or two ago. I know, and I've never owed money in taxes before, so I've saved less than $0. Oh, no. And so I was so worried. And then I was feeling, I was at a weak point. And then I got this email

from a lady that works at yuck yucks that i've never interacted with before and she's like do you want to do the show tomorrow for 200 and i was like yeah because i was you know i was in a state sure um well so that's fine yeah that's yeah is it what day of the week was it? It was a Wednesday. Yeah. No, no. So what happened was it was at a movie theater, but it's not like how sometimes, like in Toronto, there's a movie theater that has a big stage or like the Rio where you're doing like a comedy show. No, no. It's not that. It's like a cineplex where the front is like in a hole, like in a musician's pit.

What's that called? Orchestra pit? Yeah. It's like that. hole, like in a musician's pit. What's that called? Orchestra pit? Yeah. It's like that. Very, very deep. No spotlight. Nobody's introducing me. And is there a comedy show

or are you talking before Stuber? I'm talking before Stuber. Do you know about this? I saw a picture of Jane Stanton doing that. She had to do it too? Oh my God. Okay, so it was literally... This is for real? It was before the Jane Stanton doing that. She had to do it too? Oh my God. Okay, so it was literally... This is for real?

It was before the movie Stuber? Yeah. So I get there. I get there hoping so much. By the way, we're releasing this on August 5th. Stuber was a movie. Stuber was the box office shattering record breaking. I know nothing about it. I know it's got

David Bautista and Kumail Nanjiani and that's it. And they're in a car. That's right. 47% on Rotten Tomatoes. So I get this email. They're like, you're opening for Stuber. I thought it was opening for

Guster. So I see this and I really want that $200, but I'm like, I thought it was opening for Guster. Well, so I see this and I really want that $200, but I'm like, what, what's the price that I will humiliate myself? Do you get to see Stuber for free afterwards? Unfortunately,

yes, that is part of it. You have to stay and watch the movie. So you do a Q and a afterwards. Well, so that's the thing. When I first went up, I was like,

hi everybody. I am the writer director of this movie and that's really good and everybody applauded everyone i heard so many idiots right and then i was like i'm obviously kidding why would that person be here and then everyone was mad like nobody laughed somebody some guy yelled up from the back he's like you're losing the crowd how much time were you supposed to do sorry to do 15 to 20 minutes i know i know but also when i got this email i was like surely nobody will be there like best case scenario there's like a smattering of these are all contest winners well yeah so i didn't

realize it was an advanced screening. But I was like, well, if I'm going up and doing comedy, they're probably not doing trailers or something. Like there's probably a reason that I'm there. Right. Wrong. So I get there and I brought my friend with me and it's packed. It's completely like sold out. All older Asian couples, 100% older Asian couples.

They love Stuber. They love Stuber. They hate hate me it's just a nightmare stop the like pre-show like featurettes with tanner zip check there's a new guy there's a new old ass guy that i hate i hated tanner but i hate this new guy as well tanner was doing a meat and greed tanner you love tanner tanner z oh t Tanner's a little weasel shit. I hate him. He did a meet and greet in Halifax. That weasel shit has really expensive coffee beans in it. Tanner Zipchin did a meet and greet in Halifax while I was there, and I was like, should we go and heckle him? But I was not

paying $20. For people who aren't from Canada, before the movies play here, there's like, you know, a half hour of little interviews with people who are in future movies and little featurettes and they're all starring this like super cute yeah little uh 25 year old named tanner maybe maybe recently married i was looking at his hands in the last one he was wearing the ring where's the ugliest jackets i've ever seen thinks he's so

cool thinks he's a celebrity because he's on the big screen. He is. He's not. We all know his name. Tanner. Yeah. If Tanner was at this, announcing this show, standing ovation. Yeah, a lot of older Asian couples would be.

People would be like, Tanner, you've gotten smaller. That's what people would say. So, right out of the gates, you alienate this crowd. Immediately everyone's mad. A crowd where everybody's holding something. They could throw something at you, popcorn and whatnot. Everyone's yelling out. From the tomato stand.

Everybody's getting involved yelling out. I also wasn't introduced. The guy, I got there. And then also, as soon as I get there, there was my friend. I'm telling her, I'm like, I pray to God there's nobody here. And I don't really get nervous for shows often anymore but i made her touch my hands my hands were wet they were wet with sweat so did you do baby hands so i get there and there's a line around the corner like

huge lineup we were allowed to go in early thank god we go in i had to walk by all those people they're all looking at me like i'm cutting in line but they look at me worse later when i start talking to them and i go in literally every time i've done a live podcast like oh we have to be like walk past the line we're locked out of the venue everyone has to see how not show business we are i was so not show business my hands are dripping as i walk by them and we get there. And then there's two, there's security at the front of the thing.

Like I'm fucking trying to sneak into stupor. And then the guy, I always, whenever, cause people never think I'm a comedian. So whenever people start telling me like, Oh, actually the line starts over,

I let them do their whole spiel before I'm like, Oh, that's super good. I'm going to go in though. Cause I'm the talent. Yeah. Um, and then,

so he did a super long, oh yeah, thank you for coming. But the line actually starts over there. It starts around the corner. Like, like I'm, and like,

I'm a little weasel shit, like Tanner Zipton. I'm not, I'm not. So I go in and then they're like, uh, find Carlos. And there's only one person in the theater.

I'm like, hello, Carlos. He's like, hello, I'm Tanner. He's like, here's your cordless mic. You just turn it on with that button. See you later. And I was like, are you going to introduce me? What time should I go up?

How do I get paid? Lots of questions. He's like, that's not any of my business. That's not Carlos' business. I'm handing the microphone over to you. I've got to go reprogram the soda machine so it stops pouring out to just Zima. But Carlos apparently works with Stuber, so he's there to make sure I'm not

making fun of the movie. With Stuber. What do you do? I work at Stuber. And just so you know, you've signed an NDA. You can't make fun of Stuber. What do you do? I work at Stuber. And just so you know, you've signed an NDA. You can't make fun of Stuber for the next six weeks.

And like, it's supposed to be an R-rated comedy movie, right? So I'm like, my comedy is going to go over fine, right? I'm R-rated comedy. It's the same. Same, same.

Makes sense that I'm here. Sure. Yeah. So I go up. Also, the guy tells me to go up way earlier than i'm physically prepared and mentally and i'm you know i'm all wet and yeah yeah no hand it doesn't have a hand towel for you yeah so carl everyone everyone's filed in uh people have grumpy faces

and i'm just and there's i cannot stress enough how little spotlight there is on me. Like I'm so dark and loud and I have this microphone and I go up, I'm like, Hey everybody, how's it going? And people are like, who? Like, like can't even see me probably.

Where's that voice coming from? I'm like, Hey, down here in the hole, in the pit. What up? What up everybody? I'm the writer director.

Everyone's like, Ooh, ah, finally a reason that she's talking to us. And then, you know, I'm like, no, no, no. I that she's talking to us. And then, you know, I'm like, no,

no, no. I'm just, they hired, they gave me $200. Carlos handed me this microphone. Let's, let's do some comedy.

How do you feel about it? Everyone's like, Oh no, thank you. But thanks. Thanks, but no thanks. So I start going off.

People are not laughing. People are making no sounds. People are yelling out i start making fun of the movie obviously carlos we're breaking everyone carlos what we had was was real it burned it burned hot and fast like the movie stupor so like so on the big screen behind me is the two main actors, and it's just kind of a freeze frame. And I'm like, I'm as excited as you guys to see this movie starring these two actors that I know. Sure.

Everyone's laughing. I turn to Carlos. He's standing, like, right next to me also, which is not necessary. He's giving you the cut sign. No, no, no, no. He's cutting up your check. not necessary. He's giving you the cut sign. No, no, no.

He's cutting up your check. So I had done like 10 minutes and then I turned to Carlos and I'm like, Carlos, that's that was three hours, right? Feels like it. And then it's literally 10 minutes and he's like, yeah, like wrap it up because I keep railing on this movie and people are yelling like it's not going well.

And then I didn't do any of the announcements that Fox had. There's a little Fox sheet I was supposed to say like fox welcomes you etc none of that didn't didn't feel like doing that part i didn't feel it was appropriate um so then i handed the microphone off to carlos and then carlos was like ha ha ha thanks so much everybody, but I just would like to say Fox welcomes you and And Stuber is a good movie Is that what you said? He was like, she's just kidding, it's a really good movie

I wanted to yell, no I wasn't kidding Nothing I said was a kidding And I said also, I was like, no I'm excited to see Stubber, the remake of Flubber Nobody laughed it was like it's just probably the worst uh worst experience of my life and then I was like can I suggest something next time you have to open for Stuber Stuber on tour Stuber I hardly know her

that's probably in the movie yeah you should have done this gig so so yeah that was pretty brutal and then i was like well at least nobody here will interact with me like we left we my friend and i we left 10 minutes in i was like i can't be in a room with these people yeah and as soon as people started laughing at the movie i was like these people are fucking cowards i'm leaving they're gonna laugh at the jokes in this movie and not at live local comedy. I don't think so. These are not the people that I like. So we left and then I was cleansed of it. Had some weed gummies or something. I felt a lot better.

Or something. I don't remember what I took. Right. Weed gummies or CBD or mushrooms or alcohol altogether. Heroin gummies. Some kind of gummy though. If they made heroin gummies, I'd try heroin. I think everybody would.

Right. Of course. If it was in gummy form, sure. Right. Gummies are delicious. So I think I'm in the clear. I'd try heroin. I think everybody would. Right, of course. If it was in gummy form, sure. Right, gummies are delicious. So I think I'm in the clear. I'm long gone. Did you get paid?

Still have not been paid. That is also important. You're not in the clear yet. No, that's true. But do it for the exposure. Yeah, that's true. I am using Open for Kumail Nanjiani as a credit now. And David Bautista.

No. So I leave. And then later that night at midnight, I get all these tweets from people that were there. And then I'm thinking that they're going to be like, hey, I was like the regular nice, like, hey, I was laughing. Sorry that nobody else was, which is passive aggressive. But I would ask what I was expecting every night. Oh, I hate when people do that. They're like, yeah, the crowd didn't really get you, but I loved you.

And you're like, mm, you don't get me. So I got all these tweets from people being like, felt so bad for Sophie Buttle tonight. Like, they made Sophie... Like, Taggy, we made Sophie Buttle open for Stuber. It was so weird. They made her. Yeah, that's what they said. And then I also kept saying in my set like carlos

is giving me 200 can you believe it like and then oh man and then one lady that kept yelling out as i was coming up after my set she was like can i have some of that 200 and i was like no lady i don't even have the 200 oh man so it brought me it brought me right back down to earth because i was feeling i was feeling real good. I had a tour, got a new job. Yeah. But have you been paid yet? No, still no.

Is it through Yuck Yucks? Are they going to pay you? Yeah, and they said when I emailed immediately after the gig, being like, what am I fucking getting paid? While still holding the microphone. Yeah, they said, oh, we mailed out a check yesterday. And then now it's been over a week. So I don't know how long mail takes in Canada. About a week.

Yeah. Yeah. From Toronto? From Toronto. Yeah. Probably. Yeah. It's on its way.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to buy heroin with that $200. Minus its popcorn fee and of course, Carlos's appearance fee. And the five minutes Carlos did. Boy. So what about your taxes? My taxes are not

great. Because you tied this all to your taxes but maybe it was not related to it. No it was

it's just because I was feeling nervous about money so I took it. I wouldn't have taken something like this if I wasn't

I think the government usually people just need to pay $200 a year for tax. Or you just wash the government's dishes. You go in the back and wash some dishes

for your supper. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My question is, are you allowed to pay taxes late? Because that would be sick. You are? Yeah. Okay, well then I'm fine.

You might be charged like an interest fee. Yeah. I'm always getting charged interest. I live in overdraft. I'm familiar with interest. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You'll be fine. I like... Fiber? I like paying taxes. Like I stand, I like what taxes do. I stand behind taxes. I think everyone should have to pay taxes.

I just wish you didn't have to do your taxes. Yeah. I mean, that would be nice taxes. I just wish you didn't have to do your taxes. Yeah. I mean, that would be nice, but they do that on purpose. Apparently, like they make the process of doing your taxes intentionally difficult so that people end up owing more than they actually should. That that's the all the forms and stuff are intentionally made. This is what I've heard, anyways. They're made complicated on purpose so that people overpay. Oh, but then they'll pay you back if you overpay.

Because they somehow know what you owe. Well, yeah, it's like, just tell me. Yeah. Apparently you can do that, too, where you can call. And if I overpay, I don't get to charge them interest. No, that's true. Well, you could, but they won't pay it. You can charge it all day long.

You can send them brown envelopes as well, but they're just also going to throw it at the recycling like what I do. Oh, brown envelope. You're not fooling me. It's the only thing I recycle because it's brown. I'm like, that's the earth that's going to go in there. Back to where you came from. I think the last time you were here, you...

I was having some MSP issues. I was getting brown envelopes from that as well. I've been getting brown envelopes since I turned 18. It's pretty much the only mail I get. It is fun to take it up to my apartment and then recycle it. Yeah. And I don't pay

my MSP until it's like four months overdue, but there's no interest on that. But they're going to eradicate MSP next year. I thought they already had. I certainly have. Like, I'm not paying it. You went ahead and eradicated it on your own accord. Yeah. For people not from here,

MSP is your medical services plan. No, we don't have free healthcare. We just pay $37 a month for healthcare. Yeah. And you know what? $37 well spent. Yeah. I've done a gig similar to that in the, like, just this is so unbelievably bad. It was before, no, after horse racing. So, exactly.

So, horse racing open for you. Yeah. Horse racing open for me. Horse racing open for you. Yeah, horse racing over for me. But I was with a past guest, Erica Sigurdsson, and there was no spotlight. And we were against the backdrop of where the horse was raised. And the sun was going down. So as the sun went down, you were just less and less.

You were more and more backlit until you weren't lit at all so when i was on stage i was just in the corner and it was dark and nobody could see you could just hear my voice on the uh on the intercom or whatever it wasn't a professional setup it was through the intercom no it's just such a nightmare yeah like like being dark is is worse like like you can't not seeing the performer is one of the worst things for comedy because i like a comedy album i like to listen but not when that person is in the room yeah yeah yeah like it's very weird like so much and then i did this other show where there was a spotlight but it was on the floor so everyone looks so spooky so you're trying to be silly with your face and you look like this haunted skeleton.

And I could see myself. There was like windows at the back and I could see myself and I was like, who's that scary guy? Like get him off the stage scaring everybody. Whoa, Crypt Keeper at the back of the audience. Spooky butthole over here. Is that, would you say that's the worst of those gigs that you've done

um probably certainly in recent memory it's like it's a pretty bad setup like do you want to do a gig it was probably early early evening 6 p.m 7 p.m had to get there at 6 30 to check what is the campaign then like if jane stanton was doing it at a different theater are there all over canada are there comedians opening i think there must be so part of it was you had to post that you were opening for stuber on your instagram so they probably found people with um you know influencer status on instagram with four figures yeah and so i was trying to figure out who else had to do it. So I was searching for the hashtag they made us do.

But I certainly didn't do it. So I don't expect other people to do it. Carlos, he didn't have any control over anything. I'm a real loose cannon. So I actually ended up doing a story. We're supposed to post on our timeline. I did a story, but I did it right when Instagram went down a couple of days ago. It was incredible.

I saw everyone on Facebook going, is Instagram down? And then I was like, it's my time to post. Let's get over there. Post about my stupor show. And then you can see how many people see your story. And then like three people have seen it or something after like quite a few, which is low for me. I'm an influencer. So I was like, okay, I'm in the clear. Nobody needs to know that an influencer yeah yeah so i was like okay i'm in

the clear i don't nobody needs to know that this happened and i did my post i'm i'm in the clear yeah um and then i got a bunch of messages when instagram came back up for people and they're like are you serious like you're doing what do you mean maybe they boosted your post because they were felt bad because instagram was down at the time. The size of the hashtag ad I put to show that I didn't want to do it was insane. You couldn't see the movie poster. I wanted to put a filter on their faces too to make

it just look like maybe I'm just posting a picture of Kumail. Sure. What a weird... It's weird. It's not the weirdest that I've ever heard. The weirdest I've ever heard was when people did Stand up on Flights Is it like

This is a comedy And we want people laughing Before it even starts Like we want We want people Just get Tanner to Crack some jokes up there On the big screen

Tanner's so funny Tanner is not funny Tanner's funny He's charming He can do it all Good dancer Good dancer Big dick

Big hairy dick Certainly not that You can tell from Everything about him Tanner's funny. He's charming. He can do it all. Good dancer. Good dancer. Big dick. Big hairy dick. Certainly not that. You can tell from everything about him. I hope Tanner kills himself. Jesus. I mean that. Jesus.

No, and you know that I mean that because I tweeted it at him. That's the hashtag you will use. Hashtag kill yourself yourself Tanner jeez Louise no Tanner but for real kill yourself Sophie the views of

Sophie Buttle do not reflect those of Graham and I who love Tanner we love Tanner oh man you guys are just wrong though Tanner's cool

yeah he's what else does he do does he have does he juggle does he have like a talent he probably could yeah probably? He probably could. Yeah, probably.

Yeah. He probably is pretty good at hacky sack. Yeah. I bet he gives really nice hugs. Yeah. And nice neck rubs. And I like his jackets. Yeah.

I hate his jackets. I know you know. You said that. I don't even know what his jackets are. They have too many zippers. Well, his name's Tanner Zipchen. Check. Chen? Zipchen. Zen chip chen okay it's a name totally i don't know why you guys are tanner apologists we're not apologists we celebrate tanner i sing the tanner electric

it's it is we it's a very weird uh classification of celebrity where it's like a guy that everybody in canada knows by force like we didn't that's what i don't like i don't like that he's been forced upon me like movie stars have been selected by a number of different people yeah he seems like he won some kind of contest and now this is his job forever he's Rick the Temp it seems like a contest winner position that is kind of how Canada does it though yeah

if you just win a contest then you get to be you get to be famous the only celebrity in Canada yes that's kind of how it runs it's so offensive

it is offensive but it is it seems to be the way why is Graham not doing it Graham would be so much better than Tanner yeah Graham would be better but Tanner no Tanner's the best.

It's true, Tanner's got it. Graham looks great in a zipper. Graham could host the Amazing Race Canada, but no, let's get a guy who won the bobsled gold medal. Yeah, or like now Tessa Virtue is like, she's a spokesperson for 10 different products. Yeah, she's beautiful. She's beautiful, but you know. So were you. Exactly. I recently started watching

oh, you said Amazing Race, you didn't say Survivor, but I'll go ahead and tell you about Survivor. Yeah, yeah. So, me and Mace. Same thing, Jeff Burnett. No, Mark Burnett. Oh, is it the same guy? Mark Burnett produces them both. Yeah. Shonda Rimes did them all. Uh-huh, they're part of the Shondaverse. Yeah.

So, Mace and I went on our first tropical couple date. Past guest Mace Galoni. Gorgeous Mace Galoni.

Where do you go? We went to Martinique which is. It's hyphenate right? It's Mace

Galoni zip chain. Where is this? So Martinique Europe or something. It's not Europe but if I say

Europe or something people know that it's not Europe. It's tropical. Yeah it's something. It's not Europe. But if I say Europe or something, people know that it's not Europe. It's tropical. Yeah, it's tropical. It's French. Is it in the Caribbean? Sure. You don't know? Why do you know?

Because I know the planet. Like I didn't go there. So we go to Martinique. Yeah. And it was very fun. But there was was a couple days that it was raining a lot and all of us are pretty into reality tv and none of us had ever seen an episode of survivor who else was there uh mace's friend zach and his girlfriend maya okay okay so it wasn't just you two and then zach well mace's two other friends that don't have girlfriends were also going to come and then um thankfully it did not um but it was fun it was a good time but it was raining a lot

and none of us had seen survivor so we started googling what's the best season of survivor so we watched the survivor from 2007 or something it's survivor china okay and it is riveting so it has the best characters sometimes Sometimes reality TV is just magic. They get the right people together. So there's this lunch. Oh boy, this is like after I've stopped watching. Yeah. So this is after Russell.

I've only seen the one. This is after Boston Rob. Yep. This is after Colleen who ended up in that Rob Schneider movie. Oh yeah, right. Did someone get discovered from Survivor? Yeah, yeah. That's great. Tanner. I would. Did someone get discovered from Survivor? Yeah, yeah. That's great.

Tanner. I would like him if he was on Survivor. He had all those spiky hair products. Who is your favorite? Okay, so there's this lunch lady.

Her name is Denise. She's got a mullet, sure. And I am partial to mullets because Mace's hair naturally grows into a mullet. Oh, nice. Which I enjoy. I think everyone's does.

Yeah, I like it. It's my white trash roots that just really, I'm very into them. Please turn off your cell phones before Stuber. That's another announcement I did not do. You know what? Just scroll through your phone during Stuber. Oh, yeah. I didn't say put away your phones for the movies but i said put away

your phones because i don't want this documented that i was here um so there's this lunch lady denise she's like she's she's a lunch lady you know she's got this mullet and then at the end at the like in the final in the live in the studio finale uh the host is being kind of rude to her like not rude rude but kind of passive aggressive he was like so denise people want to know about the mullet like i know about the mullet but why do you have this mullet and then um so what we had suspected watching the whole season was correct that it is a sex mullet so she sugar baby sex mullet so So what is a sex mullet? I mean, what's a not sex mullet?

Am I right, boys? How old a woman is Denise? I'm not going to guess in ages, but she's 40. How old am I? 40. Close. Yeah, I just guessed 40. So he said, what's the deal with your mullet?

And she was like, well, I have to have short front hair as a lunch lady, but I want to remind my husband I'm still a woman, so I keep it long in the back. I thought that was the cutest thing I've ever heard. That's not a sex mullet. We all were like, yeah, sex mullet. It is, it's a sex, because if it's just for the husband and you have to see it from the back, that's a sex because if if it's just for the husband and you have to see it from the back

that's a sex model yeah but is he ever confused is this a man what am i doing who are you and denise had this like kind of romance with james this like tall black buff um grave digger his job was a grave digger this is lunch lady and a grave digger. His job was a grave digger. Jesus! Lunch lady and a grave digger. By season 7 they were like, who's left? I'm a lunch lady. I'm a grave digger. I host little featurettes before Canadian movies.

No, James was great though and they really liked each other and it was so cute because they would both say to their camera she's a hard worker he's a hard worker. We just recognize and they hug each other and then there's one challenge where they get separated one of them has to go to the other tribe and then they're against each other in something one of them has to serve lunch and the other one has to dig a grave but they they did the switch up yeah that's what the switch up movie with ryan reynolds is based off of is

james and denise they got in a big fight because one of the contestants died and they didn't know whether to serve them for lunch or bury them. So they did this challenge where they both had to eat. I forget what it's called, but it's like a like a live, not a live chicken, but like a fully grown chicken. Embryo. Yeah. Yeah. And it's pretty nasty. You can see its feathers.

It's pretty gross. And then Denise is trying to eat it for her team, and then James is just not eating it to try to give Denise a heads up. And then Denise couldn't eat it either. She kept spitting it out. She kept putting it in and spitting it out. Huh.

And, yeah, she said. Classic lunch lady. Well, yeah, she said on the camera even. She's like, yeah, I don't eat dead chickens. Like, we just. I'm a live chicken. We eat French fries. So I thought that that was really cute and then james but then james so there's immunity idols if you have an immunity idol and you play it at the fire at the fire time

then you don't get kicked off if you're the one that's voted off so james ends up with two immunity idols he has both of them but everybody loves him so he doesn't think he's getting kicked off and then two different weeks go by at the fire time and he doesn't play his immunity idols and everyone knows he has two immunity idols so then they're all whispering they're like we should kick off james before he plays his his idols and they do they kick him off and then it's a really tense moment when the host is like if you have an immunity idol play it now and then james is like looking around like oh my gosh and then there was this girl the episode before that who's so stupid she thought

she found an immunity idol and she's all smug in the fire time and the host is like you have an immunity idol or no no she doesn't even prompt And the host is like, you have an immunity. I don't know. She doesn't even prompt it. She's just like, if one had an immunity idol, when would they play it? And then the host is like, you can play it now. And she was like, a yoink. Here's my chicken embryo. And then the host is like, this would be the time to play an immunity idol. But this is not one.

And then he threw it in the fire. Whoa. Oh, it was not one? And then he threw it in the fire. Whoa. Oh, it was not one? Huh? She didn't, what did she, how, so she loses it forever?

Yeah, she's just stupid. And then she got sent home. I love it. We were like, good, later bitch. And then she later got married to one of the other contestants. So she's fine.

Don't feel bad for her. I want to go back to this mullet talk. Yeah. From 45 minutes ago. You should have just described that season before Stuber. The woman who cuts my hair, the first time she cut my hair,

I was like 24 or something. Are you 24? I'm 26 now. Wow. Been with her for a long time yeah uh and i said oh my hair naturally grows into a mullet and she was like oh everyone's does that's why whenever you see a picture of a caveman they have a mullet what and she still cuts my hair i was like this is she gets it a picture of a cave. A picture of a caveman? Every time you see a picture of a caveman. What picture of a caveman? The Encino Man poster? Yeah.

You know, here's a picture of a caveman washing his El Camino in cutoffs. Oh my God. Maybe I need to go to a different lady. I think mullets are back. I think mullets are back I think mullets They've been back every They never left 12 years

Yeah they come and go And then sometimes You see somebody And you're like Don't know if you're just All the time mullet person Or if you're just Trendy

Yeah Or if yeah This is a fashionable mullet Or I like when girls have mullets Have like a little short mullet Yeah Something to remind you

you know that you're a lady and to remind the students that you're a lunch lady oh yeah and then Denise also so after who won that season um Bronco oh this idiot this little weasel guy so so I didn't like him but he was very strategic so he had seen every season of Survivor so I didn't like him, but he was very strategic. So he had seen every season of survivor. So I couldn't relate to him. And at the beginning, the very first episode, he's making all these alliances. He,

and he was the one that gave James immunity idols. He, he was kind of orchestrating the whole season. He ended up winning. So he did kind of deserve it. And I'm glad that one of his, and so at the end, they asked him how he won.

And he's like, well, I had my strategy, like make friends with someone weaker than me make make friends with the strong guy and then um and then win my strategy was to win yeah yeah but i did it in the in the in studio finale they were asking everyone how because it's months after that last episode, everyone's put their weight back on. Yeah, literally everyone's put their, yeah. The survivor diet looks, anyway. So, Denise, the host is like, Denise, how's it going with your sex mullet?

And she's like, not so good, host, because she went back to work and then she couldn't get her job back because the principal said that she was too distracting to the students. And then she was so sad she was like i would go in and then all the kids would go 50 kids would go by and go hi denise hi denise hi and she loved it and it was so sad so then the commercial break happens and then it comes back on and then the host is like okay so this is live but um the creator of the show has decided to give Denise $50,000 of his own money. Wow.

In exchange for one Salisbury steak. You deserve it in your classic lunch lady style. But it's like so cute because everyone's so sad for Denise and she's like, yeah, so if you know anybody who needs a lunch lady. That sucks. It sucks so bad. And then

it comes out that she did not lose her job. Oh yeah, this double sucks. It sucks so bad. Yeah. And then it comes out that she did not lose her job. Oh, yeah. This double sucks. She had been promoted. She had two jobs. She had been promoted out of lunch lady and she wanted her lunch lady position back. Into dinner lady.

Yeah, she was then brunch lady. Oh, boy. But she got to keep the money, thankfully. Bless. Oh, yeah. Well, it was Mark Burnett going to take it back? He's a Trumpo No he's not a Trumpo But he

Maybe he is He created He's Trumpo Yeah He created The Apprentice Which created Trumpo Yeah Well that's great

That is great Are you going to watch other seasons? No I'm done That's it I feel that I've gotten what I needed from the show. Yeah, one magic season. How many seasons did you watch?

I watched maybe the first two when it first aired. Yeah, maybe I was three or four. Yeah, and then I think after two seasons of just about any reality TV show, I'm like, I get it. Have you watched any Bachelor or Bachelorette? Still no? reality TV show, I'm like, I get it. Have you watched any Bachelor or Bachelorette? Still no? Yeah, I watched the season that

the Canadian lady was on quite a few years ago. Like a contestant was the Canadian lady? The Bachelorette, she was Canadian. Oh, Jasmine? No, Jillian. Okay, because Jasmine's a Vancouver hairdresser that I know that was Canada's Bachelorette last year or two years ago?

We don't know. Doesn't matter. But this season of, I know that was Canada's Bachelorette last year, two years ago. We don't know. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. But this season of, I know you're trying to move on, but this season of Bachelorette is really good because. I'm not trying to move on from anything. Yeah. I can see in your eyes. You're both.

We pre-taped like five episodes in two weeks. We have no topic. Oh, your listeners. Your listeners at this point. We have no topic. Oh, your listeners. Your listeners at this point. So this season of Bachelorette is really good because it's rare that the villain or the crazy person makes it to the end.

And he's already in top three. So when this comes out, the finale probably will have already aired. But it's only happened when I've. Who's the villain? Or crazy person. Cruella DeVille. Luke P. Okay. Luke P.

Luke P is like the kind of traditionally the hottest one like yeah like super muscly dave yeah right tanner type yeah so he's kind of been a loose cannon the whole season but they also it's so overproduced and edited that it's it's hard to tell if someone's actually crazy or if they're making us think he's crazy so i'm kind of turning around on him he's been he seemed real crazy and now i like him but like he's not violent is he yes okay so he's crazy so i'm kind of turning around on him he's been he seemed real crazy and now i like him but like he's not violent is he yes okay so he slammed one of the other contestants and then kneed him in the head but he says that he didn't need him in the head he was just trying to step over him after he had floored him okay so is this during some kind

of competition or during the rose ceremony no i'm just kidding i'm just kidding they were playing rugby really yeah oh yeah this this bachelorette i don't like when they pick a bachelorette that's like 23 because then she like the reason she's still with luke is because she hasn't dated a lot of people so she's dating her like crazy guy now and she's like all the guys keep telling her to get rid of him and then she's like no, no, but I, you know. Does every, in your experience, does every woman date a crazy guy at some point? Yeah, just by the odds, like, of course. Right, okay. I was just, yeah, I was just,

I didn't know if that was a woman general thing or a bachelor specific thing. Oh, that's a true, I think every young woman has dated someone a bit, probably every young man has dated a crazy girl too. Yeah, but I feel like there's also, I hear a lot of young men think, I've only dated crazy girls. All my exes were crazy. Yeah, that young man is probably the crazy one that's dating all these girls.

Yeah, yeah. We can get our crazy fix. But this guy is confirmed used to be crazy. He talks about it. Used to be doing drugs, having too much sex. And now he's very religious. He's turned the other cheek. Now he's doing God and not having enough sex.

Yeah. This is Luke. Yeah. Okay. So that's the thing about the sex is that the teaser. That's the thing about the sex. That's the thing. So Luke Pepperoni.

That's what he stands for so the teaser for the finale is that luke p is having dinner with the bachelorette and then he says to her um let's talk about sex and she's like okay luke what what what and then he's like um i just want to make sure that you're not having sex with the other contestants. Right before Bachelorette. That's a fair question. But it's right before Fantasy Suites. And it's like, oh, she's the horniest Bachelorette I've ever seen.

Now, see, that's a show I would watch. Yeah, the horniest Bachelorette. She's real horny. Yeah. You should have seen her when they were playing rugby. She's doing like backflips. She's so horny. When they were hurting each other.

Oh, and then they were in Scotland. She was doing backflips. She was so horny when they were hurting each other oh and then they were in scotland she was doing backflips she was so horny horny backflips from rugby you better not let her watch lacrosse or she'll do a triple toe loop this girl was so horny she was doing backflips how horny was she so she also they were in scotland and she also made them fight each other in scotland This girl was so horny. She was doing back lifts. How horny was she? So she also, they were in Scotland, and she also made them fight each other in Scotland in kilts. Oh, I saw that episode.

Well, yeah, so they had no underpants under the kilts, too. So she kept seeing stuff. And you could see her peeking. Like, she's just a full perv. Yeah, well, everyone likes the droopy fighting genitalsitals that was my high school's football team fighting genitals now uh so it's not over yet but no it's not over yet but this teaser has just come out and so it how did she react to him saying so what's great is that she's southern and she was a contestant on last year's bachelor and she said to the bachelor and then last year's bachelor was the virgin and then she had said to

him i feel so bad that i've had sex before so that's so that i can't give that to the person that i'm marrying and then we're all like ew like thumbs down to her don't like that energy and then now she's really turned around she's a thick southern accent and now she's all about being horny looking at droopy genitals like she's a changed woman and so he says that to her i just want to make sure you're not having sex with people and then it cuts to her standing up while he's getting into the car to leave and then she's like um you are not my husband and even if you were my husband you can't tell me what to do with my body. And I have had sex. And guess what? Jesus still loves me. And it slams the door.

Oh, wow. So I'm pretty excited to see that. But then there's another teaser. I'm sorry. Sorry. Dave just hit me in the face. I threw a pen down and it bounced over me. I'm so sorry.

No, I know that's how we all felt, though. So then this other teaser comes out. Everyone's throwing pens at me. It's crazy. This other teaser comes out of the host talking to her. It's clearly the finale. And he's like, he's here. And he has a ring.

And he's ready to propose to you. And it doesn't show who it is. But we're all like, oh, I wonder who would do some shit like that. It's going to be Luke Pepe. It's going to be Luke P. It's going to be Luke Pepperoni. Or maybe it's the Virgin from the last season. He's very happy with his basic ass Cassie. We don't like Cassie.

Have you watched every season of this? No, it depends if I like The Bachelor or The Bachelorette. I mean, no, I watched last season. I didn't really like him. But they had teased him jumping over the fence so many times. And then it was like in the last episode. So, I was waiting so patiently. I don't know.

Literally jumping over a fence? Yeah. So, he. Why did I ask? Get comfortable. Where are my pens? So, Dave. Look at me in the eyes. Yeah. where are my pens so so Dave

look at me in the eyes yeah so what was interesting about him jumping over the fence was not that he jumped over the fence

but that was also very exciting because it's a really high fence and he jumped it in a single bound he's this is the fence

surrounding the bachelor mansion well yeah they were in they were in some country but, he's very, he was like a fence surrounding the bachelor mansion. Well, yeah, they were in, they were in some country, but they were fenced in. What was interesting about it

was when he jumped because he, I think there were three girls left. I'm not very good at telling stories, but I'm trying to get it all out. You can edit it into a more cohesive. Yeah. So,

um, there were three girls left. We don't really know who he's going to pick yet. And then one, do they have a gummy cocaine? Yeah. I'm starting to wonder.

Yes, I'm trying to get sponsored by them. So there's three girls left. We don't know who he's going to pick. And then one of the girls, after they met the families, the dad didn't like him. So then the dad contacts this girl and is like, yeah, I don't think this guy is great. So then she's like, okay, I'll break up with him. So she's talking to the bachelor and she's like hey i break up with you i break up with you on behalf of my dad and then he starts shaking and he's like i wanted it to be you i was gonna pick you and she's like oh but gotta go i already said i break up with you i mean unless you can

jump over a fence but i mean mean, what are the odds? So that's the thing. He's like, okay, I don't want you to go. Bye bye. So then she gets in the car and she leaves. And then he's all crying and grumpy. So then he runs and he goes and he jumps over the fence. And then.

Did they, by the way, when this episode was airing. Yes. Because they had previewed him jumping over a fence. Did they do a shot of the fence at the very beginning to be like, it's going to happen today. Yeah. over a fence. Did they do a shot of the fence at the very beginning to be like, huh? It's going to happen today. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Uh, they implied it was going to be the fence episode. Every episode. He keep us going. Cause it was such a vanilla season. It was very boring. Oh.

And it also, they thought it was going to be so cool and edgy to have a virgin bachelor. And it ended up being very edgy, but it ended up being the season where the most women left on their own accord. They all jumped over the fence. In a Honda Accord. So he jumps over this fence and then what's crazy. He breaks his hymen.

No longer a virgin. Season over. Not interesting anymore. But he jumps over this fence and then so many producers are chasing after him and they're looking through the forest and there's like these lights it's this crazy search party we've never had this happen before no but that's what makes you realize like how how much of a like important person this is because it's obviously like expensive a lot of viewers sure the b The bachelor's never,

never tried to escape. And that's probably why I had to jump over. Like you're probably not allowed to leave. Yeah. It's like Rapunzel. Oh man. That is, uh,

uh, that's very funny. It was very funny when people on reality shows have had enough and they walk away and then you see what the producers of the show look like it's always great well yeah and then they made the host go after him who does no work at all chris harrison he's not even running he's walking around they obviously woke him up and we're like he's escaped get my sandals i'll go look for my net i'll put some posters on my net. One of those dog ones.

It's like a stick. So eventually he finds him. He's still walking. The bachelor's running. He's an ex-NFL. He's very athletic. He's running. The host is walking slowly.

He's like, Colton, the host? No, the, yeah, okay. The host is definitely not. He fucks for sure. Yeah, yeah. But the former NFL player was a virgin? Yeah, and that's the guy that jumped over the fence. The virgin that jumped over the fence.

That's from the nursery rhyme. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how I fall asleep. I count virgins jumping over a fence. So he's walking so slowly after him and then finally catches up to him because, you know, they tripped him or something. And he's like, where are you going? And then he's like, I after him and then finally catches up to him because you know they tripped him or something sure and he's like where are you going and then he's like i'm leaving i'm done and then he's like they don't show it on camera but he's like you owe us a lot of money

then and he's like okay i'll stay yeah yeah they did that to this bachelorette this season too she was getting frustrated because everyone was going all crazy about luke and then she's like i want to keep luke but then making everybody all crazy yeah yeah yeah so uh they had to do a sit down her and chris harrison the host and he was like so you're frazzled and she's like yes i just i i love luke but he's a psychopath and everybody hates him and i'm a licensed host so this is a good person to talk to about this yeah yeah it was so weird and it's just like like luke is so dumb and it's so frustrating because like he is so dumb and it's so frustrating because he's so dumb

and he's so mean to all the other guys and she's trying so hard to make it work. They're on this one one-on-one date and that's a date where it's just

the two of them. Oh, I understand that. One-on-one? Got it. You guys don't know the show. Do they have a lot of four-on-one dates

or anything? Yeah, they do group dates often. And 2-on-1 dates where one of them gets eliminated at the end and they get killed. Yeah, they get thrown over the fence. Yeah, and someone can dig, we have a guy who can dig a grave. Yeah, but they don't often. And serve a lunch. They don't often show the producers.

So whenever it happens, it's pretty exciting. So she's on this date with Luke and then she, all she wants him to say is one emotion that he's familiar with anger yeah but that's what she wants she wants anything she keeps saying to him just tell me how you feel tell me an emotion tell me how you feel like just like she's like i just need something to work here and then he's given her nothing he just keeps saying like i just want you to have clarity and she's like ah so then it cuts to her she walks away she's pissed she's talking to the producer she's taking her sweater off she's sweating she's angry she's like can someone go tell him an emotion because i can't she says this to him and they're filming and then they're like you have to talk to him like that's what the show is yeah it's not producer comes on set and explains emotions like happy sad mad yeah here's a drawing of a bunch of

different faces she's asking someone to go do that because she wants so desperately to make it work with how do you feel surprised and so they're like no you have to talk to him so she's like all right let me back in the ring she does like a ponytail she's like let's do this she goes back she sits down she's like tell me how you feel like i feel frustrated and then he's like i just want you to have clarity and then she's like ah so she goes insane at the end of the day she she tells him like i'm not going to give you a rose because of obvious reasons and then his first reaction is i'm shocked yeah where was this emotion but here's the thing that's what she wanted in the first place.

So then she ends up giving him the rose. Yep. And then now he's in the finals. Quit playing games with my heart. You know, I think that they're going to end up very happy together for 15 minutes. And then it's going to be a hellish relationship there. But they are going to end up together. I think she's actually going to pick Big Head Jed.

Big Head Jed? Yeah. Jed's got a big head. Well, I mean, good nickname. Mace calls him Jumbo Head Jed, and he's like, that's how they got the name Jed, because jumbo and head. He's got to keep himself busy while I make him watch this show.

Yeah, sure, yeah. He's busy practicing his fence jumps you want to do a get to know us with you and me uh one minute each uh sure should i set a timer yep okay keep it tight boy okay get to know me okay timer one minute are you counting this in your minute? No, no. Starting now. Well, so I have this game on my phone called Series, and it lets you play like you're a character in a TV show, and I was playing Saved by the Bell,

and the plot is that you are a guy. You got to make your own name. I'm a character named Toronto Dickhole, and I got in a time machine and you switch places with Screech. But it's also somehow the future

and Mr. Belding's retired, but Zach is still the same age and you got to get him out of detention. It's got too much, it's too meta. It's like you have to talk to the narrator,

like other people can hear the narrator and they're like, who are you talking to? And, oh, boy, I guess I got some extra time. And I guess Slater has kind of a sex mod. But, like, is this like cartoons and stuff? Yeah. Okay. But it gives you, like, questions, and you're you, you're trying to sneak Zach out of detention. Oh,

time's up. Oh, okay. All right. Saved by the bell. I was. But, you can,

and it's like, do you choose to get them out this way or? Well, adventure game. Yeah, it's like an adventure game and there's a law and order one

and. Fun. But it's. That sounds very, I get a lot of Instagram ads for that game. Yeah, that's what I,

where I saw it. That's how I find all my games. Yeah, there was like Breakfast Club 2 and with the sequel. Yeah, that's where I saw it. That's how I find all my games. Yeah, there was like Breakfast Club 2 with the sequel. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Brunch Club. Yeah. So, sorry, did I take up too much time?

No, no. It's great. Do you want to go for a minute? Yeah. Okay. Three, two, one, blast off. I was watching some YouTube videos, and one of the recommendations in the side column was 10 things you

need to know on your first day in prison. So I watched that and ended up going down a whole YouTube rabbit hole where I watched about I want to say between 10 and 15 different tutorials about what to do when you're in prison. And one of the things

that came up over and over again is that you have to learn, you have to know how to play cards. But that was the one thing that I'm like, this is something I think I could do. I could learn how to play cards. I'm less likely to try and chank a guy

or try and punch out a guy on the first day, but playing cards and being good at cards, I feel like I could do that. What kind of cards do they play? They play every... This guy said you have to know all the games. And they won't teach you. They're not going to teach you.

That's a sign of weakness. No, being taught. Yeah, I did it. That's pretty funny. Yeah, it's like a whole sub-genre of YouTube videos. Yeah, it's funny to picture other people preparing to go to prison and doing exercises and stuff, and then you see Graham playing Solitaire. I learned Solitaire.

Hey, he said all the games. Yeah, you do have to learn all the games. Can you teach me Solitaire? No one likes me. Well, sometimes you end up in Solitaire. That's true. You have a deck of cards. You know what to do. I'm going to ball to learn all the games you teach me solitaire no one likes me well sometimes you end up in solitary it's true deck of cards you know what to do i'm bald to bounce against the wall um uh but you know you guys watch the central park five netflix thing i watched the first episode but i will yeah so near the end one of the guys is in solitary that's the guy that you feel the most bad for don't tell me who to feel bad for.

No, you feel bad for him. I feel bad for Luke P. But this guy, and so I know that when you're in solitary, one thing that you can do for fun is hallucinate. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You know, it's like one of those float tanks. Yeah, you just close your eyes and like, close your eyes and rub the

heels of your hands against them really hard. Get floaters. Do we want to move on to a little bit of business? Yeah. Stop Podcasting Yourself is brought to you in part by Zip Recruiter. Hiring is challenging,

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ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire. Off I go. Have a good day. Back to the morgue with you. Yeah, I'm going to go hang out with all those corpses. Now, Stop Podcasting Yourself is also brought to you by squarespace if you want to build uh your own website squarespace is the place to do it you can create a beautiful website to showcase your work blog or publish content announce an upcoming event or special project oh no it's

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and everything optimized for mobile right out of the box. Mobile, eh? Yeah, like Dick Tracy's communication watch. The British Dick Tracy. Call me on my mobile watch, he says, he says. Exactly. I do accents, too. You're very talented.

Thank you. You and your square too. You're very talented. Thank you. You and your square head. And buxom. I didn't want to say anything, but. I saw you looking. If you want to build your own website, head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use the offer code SPY to to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain that's squarespace.com enter code spy well i'm gonna go over the morgue and i guess kind of hang out in one of those slabs yeah yeah yeah get back on the slab can you zip me up

one two one two three hi everybody my name is justin mcroy i'm sydney mcroy we're both doctors and nope just me okay well sydney's a doctor and i'm a medical enthusiast and we create sawbones a marital tour of misguided medicine every week i dig through the annals of medical history to bring you the wildest grossest sometimes dumbest tales of ways we've tried to treat people throughout history. Lately, we do a lot of modern fake medicine because everything's a disaster. But it's slightly less of a disaster every Friday right here on MaximumFun.org as we bring you Sawbones, a marital tour of misguided medicine. And remember, don't drill a hole in your head.

Don't drill a hole in your head. Overheard. Overheard is a segment which if you hear something or somebody, you know, a loved one hears something and relays it to you, that counts too. Now we share them here on the podcast and we always like to start with the guests. Sophie? Yeah. two now we share them here on the podcast and we always like to start with the guests sophie yeah so i have one and then two different of my friends have both given me one as well that's very nice of them it's very nice so how are we gonna do this are we gonna go one sophie me sophie you sophie yeah or sophie sophie sophie um i mean everything is sophie but i'll do yeah we'll do that.

We'll alternate. So the first one, I think you guys are going to enjoy because it's my friend that I brought to the movie theater show that I did. Oh, did you do a movie theater show? What was that about? I was opening for Kumail Nanjiani in a theater. It was pretty big for my career. Oh, yeah, yeah, in a theater.

Good. Yeah, I totally got paid. So I was pretty sick. So she was sitting in the crowd watching this fiasco go down. And there was a couple in front of her that in the middle of my set, the man turned to the woman and said, very inappropriate. Oh, boy. It's, the two mediums do not mix well together. The film and the live show. Not much mixes with stand-up comedy.

No. People try. Jazz. Yeah, that's true. That's why I always have my backing band with me. Hey, baby, I hear the blues are calling. Toss salads and scrambled eggs. Thank you.

Dave, do you have an overheard? Mine is an overseen. This is a... I was driving down the highway because I just really want to open up my car's engine and see what it can do. And there was just an 18 wheeler uh delivery company and it looked like what are those like there's just like food companies that deliver you know all the milk for

sure sure but like they'll deliver like every cafeteria has like a brand of i forget the name of the brands i'm not doing a good job dairy land yeah but like a company that will like i'm delivering all of monday's lasagna and all of tuesday's chicken pot pies oh just like a general they may pre-make all the food for right yeah stuff like that and this was a company called a a branded uh, uh, uh, a branded truck. Uh, it was called Quadra ingredients. And I was like, well,

it's not food. Why not call it Quadra foods? And on the back of it, it's just little, uh, like, uh, you know,

a little sort of small bowl of cut up cubes of butter, a small bowl of beans, a small bowl of sour cream. So it's like, it looks just like they're delivering stuff for a cooking segment on tv maybe that's what they do yeah we handle all the cooking segments for morning news shows guys we've recorded a lot i don't have a lot of overseens but i like that picture that's it erica sigurdson and i were talking about

those little tasty videos of you see all the ingredients you see the hands and they're making something yeah and then erica was like yes it would be easy for me to make that too if i had all the little bowls of ingredients already yeah yeah if all you have to do is just throw together ingredients yeah yeah easy peasy um the buying of the bowl i think todd glass has a bit about, yeah, it's easy if you've got the cut up shit in your mouth. I'm talking about the magic bullet. The magic bullet. That infomercial.

Now, Sophie, you have another. Oh, back to Sophie. Oh, back to Sophie. Finally. So, this one is my friend Noodle in Ottawa. Have we talked about noodle before um people know about noodle yeah so noodle and i were shopping maybe on weed gummies and noodle appears like in tears we had separated shortly for browsing and she came back and she's like

there's this three-year-old that was the mom said to hey, where did you get that toy? And then he said, big kids don't steal. So he must have acquired it. Legally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, cool kid. Are weed gummies your drug of choice? Yes, and my candy of choice. Because last time,

or one of the times here, I remember you telling a story about going out with your dad to a jazz show and smoking pot. Yeah, I don't like to smoke. I don't like how it feels in my lungs. But I'll have a little piece of edible. And then it's a lot more slow releasing. Slow roasted. Yeah.

Falling off the bone. If you're watching a movie or like I like to take a little nibble after I do a set and then I walk home and then it hits me as I walk home. And then I go to the grocery store and browse for three hours. I read ingredients. I smell everything. I have a good time. It helps if you have an early set like before a seven o'clock movie. Oh, definitely.

Definitely. Oh, I had more than a nibble after that. Really needed to unwind. And I'm not a big drinker so it's good for me to chill out yeah cool it's all legal right not edible well okay you're a criminal big girls aren't big kids don't do crime drugs uh what's up with you oh overheard wise yeah uh i was uh i was on a bus that was an entire filled with an entire class of kids. Oh, for like summer camp?

Yeah, it was just like a bunch of kids and they were all going crazy because they were on the bus and there's kind of no rules because there's only one person monitoring all of them. It's Graham. It was me. Their adult had to abandon them on the bus and we're just cruising along

and like everybody those kids are having more fun than anybody's ever had on a bus and then one kid screamed out oh my god

I can see my house that is exciting it is exciting to pass by your especially when you're like oh if I got off here, I could just go home. It was going to stop me. Were they all wearing matching t-shirts?

Yep. I've been seeing that a lot. A lot of day camps where all the kids are in the same color shirt. Yeah. And it's, I think maybe they were going to go to play baseball or something. They had a bunch of paraphernalia. But yeah, it's high time for the day camps. Yeah.

Yeah. It's like the Warriors. Some of them are playing baseball. Yeah. Some of them just have bottles on their fingertips. Yeah. That's like a craft camp. Non-Pleasant Community Center, come out to play.

Over here, Christian horse camp. What up? Are the horses Christian? The horses are Muslim. Interesting. I've got to take five breaks a day. And then the final overheard from Sophie. Okay, so mine isn't overseen.

I have been, I've really taken to joining private facebook groups i find that you're invited to no so i think that it's a really good way to use social media because you just end up scrolling and you see pictures of people and it's just not what you want but if you join a little community then it's it i i find it just makes for a more authentic social media and you do this at random or do you pick? So that's the thing. So some I think are funny to join and some are, like I joined a houseplant group. They post wonderful memes.

I enjoyed that one. Sure. Awesome. Yeah, I joined a. You could pass for a houseplant. Thank you. So I like the houseplant group. I joined i joined a futurama group that one's very fun and then joined a couple randoms for fun so one of them i joined was a parkour group oh nice um

to see what the parkour community is is talking about and it's very large like all of them have hundreds of thousands of members and i saw this status somebody had posted uh in the parkour group uh any tips on how to jump higher and there was only one comment and it was luke p go over this yeah the guy was like any tips on how to jump higher and then the comment was um use your legs legs but it's like that's a relevant question for that group it's it's like the number one yeah yeah like if they rank the questions of what's been asked the most it's like how can a jump higher how do you unless or what is parkour is the unless i made a mistake and then that was a question in the host plant group. In which fair. Oh boy.

Everything about parkour seems like I feel like a good question would be like what are the best shoes for this? Yeah. Like what gives you a good grip on a wall? Yeah. Do you use some sort of powder on your hands to keep them dry? Can you fingertip exercise? Maybe shoes and gloves made out of that, like, sticky hand.

Gloves, like a hand. Yeah, the flick on the wall one. That toy. Yeah. Yeah. I can't believe people are still parkouring all over the place. I really like the idea of parkour. I kind of want to take a class or something because it seems like the best way as a woman.

Like, I don't want to take a self-defense class, but how great would it be if someone came up to me with like a knife and they were like, I'm going to rob you and do stuff to you. And then I just like jumped onto the roof. Yeah. If you're just like, yeah, yeah. Just scuttled up a wall. Yeah. Oh, well, that was unexpected. Yeah.

That's my parkour training and my Zoidberg training from the Futurama group. I think. Love to go for a scuttle. The P in Luke P is Luke Parkour. Oh, that's my parkour training and my Zoidberg training from the Futurama group. I'd love to go for a scuttle. The P in Luke P is Luke Parkour. Oh, that's why he's doing so well. Jumped into her heart. Are you guys all virgins? That would be my question in the parkour group. Are we all virgins?

How do you not be a virgin? Use your legs. How do I become the subject of a ZZ Top song? In addition to our overheards, we have overheards sent in from people all over the map. If you want to send one in, you can send it in to spy at maximumfund.org. And this first one comes from Rod S. from Corpus Christi, Texas. I work at a television station where I overheard this exchange. A viewer called into our newsroom asking about the weather. The person who answered the phone told him, hang on, let me ask my meteorologist.

He placed the collar on hold while pulling out his cell phone and asking siri is it going to rain today yeah that's good customer service who calls the yeah calling the newsroom to see if it will rain that's a tip line you're supposed to be telling them yeah you're supposed to be telling them that you know it's gonna rain yeah a meteorological tip line i got uh my knees acting up so i think it's gonna be that's a very like that the person who called must be so old uh yeah but I also like even, even picturing, uh, my grandparents would never call into a TV station to ask. Yeah. It was just like looking in the newspaper.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. One of my favorite moments in Mean Girls is when the Amanda Seyfried character, yeah, is outside. It's pouring rain and she starts touching your boobs and she's like, there's a 30% chance it's already raining. Yeah. That was a weird bit. I mean, people didn't see you just do the act out on yourself. I did a little act out.

On Graham. And look, it's raining now. Hello. This next one comes from Mitchell in Montana. This is a woman to a group of friends. I could show you 100 memes that would really put this into context. To put this other meme into context. Meme girls over here.

Oh, yes. That'd be good. Like, uh, for a group about just fun memes. Yeah. But also about mean girls. Yeah. Like, I'm a member of a Simpsons one that's just Simpsons memes. Is it a Facebook group?

Yeah, a Facebook group. Man, oh, man. They post a lot. It'll eat up your timeline for sure. That's why you've got to join so many of them that your timeline gets confused. That's smart. They're confusing. I follow Instagram things, and if they post too much, I'm out.

You can mute people. No, but I just, I want, it's not that I. You want them to know you're angry. No, I just, I want to have three memes a day. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. But I don't want to be overwhelmed. I want someone to show me the three best hockey memes. Yeah.

The three best. What other memes? You know, I like a good, I like a good Simpsons meme. They really have dissected and redirected that series. Sports memes are fun. Yeah. I like news of the day memes. I saw a good meme today that was two pictures of Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un.

Is this the new one? Il? Un. Kim. It's Trump and Kim Jong-un. Is the new one ill? Un. Kim. Kim. It's Trump and Kim. Yeah. And the first one is like Trump is, it says on Trump,

describing a meme on a podcast is very. No, no, this is what I want. Okay. So it's on Trump. It says me showing a meme on my phone to my mom. And then. I saw this too. Oh yeah. And then the second one is

is kim and trump is looking grumpy and then the second one is is kim as the mom being like uh who is that in this photo is that your friend see now i haven't seen it it was still funny this is so dumb see but that's oh man i love i love like showing my mama meme memes like there's another one where it's like mom look at this funny picture and then it's like my mom goes and gets glasses sits on couch gets a blanket makes a snack and she's like okay show me um this last one comes from alex a i was walking on the songies walkway in victoria don't know what now me neither uh when i overheard a brief snippet of a man's conversation as he spoke loudly on his cell phone i didn't like what he said it just didn't make sense to me.

I was high, yes. Gummits. Oh boy. Yeah. Oh man, now I'm just thinking about memes. I've already heard two today. Oh yeah, you've got one left. I can only hear one more meme.

Use it wisely. Yeah, pace yourself. In addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls. If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844- 779-7631. That's one. Ugh. Spy pod one. Like these people have.

Hey Dave Graham and possible guests. This is Evan from Ann Arbor, Michigan. I have an overheard of the white guy in dreads talking on the phone variety. I was walking out of my apartment and he was walking in and he was on the phone and I heard him give this guy his number very solemnly. And there was about five seconds of silence. very solemnly, and there was about five seconds of silence, and very enthusiastically he goes, yeah, yeah, other than that, my summer's been bitchin'.

And I had to stifle my laughter, and then as I was walking away, I hear him very faintly as he's walking into the apartment complex say, yeah, it's been bitchin'. Yeah. Yeah. I know we're only 10 days into it. Yeah, but it's like the end of Stand By Me. That was the bitchinest summer that ever lived. It was really bitchin'.

I wonder if I would like Stand By Me now. I just watched it a couple months ago. Still fun. Still a coming of age story. You know, the pie eating contest scene is great. What's his name? He's amazing in it. River Phoenix.

Yeah. What an actor. That's what everyone said. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was really good. Yeah, but. Fat Jerry O'Connell. Fat Jerry O'Connell.

Like, that's the star. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you ever seen it no I know the song yeah and I know fat people yeah

you can put it together in your head love both those things yeah yeah yeah you ever seen a dead body um near beeswax alright

good answer good answer here's your next phone call hey guys uh this is Patrick Foy in Omaha I have an over scene I guess I was just at a Here's your next phone call. Hey, guys. This is Patrick Foy in Omaha.

I have an over scene, I guess. I was just at a gas station, and I was buying a slice of pizza. And a guy in front of me in line turned around and said, I guess that's not going to be enough pizza. And then he pointed at my belly. I'm kind of a fatter guy. And then he patted his own belly and then he laughed and i'm kind of at a loss about it as a thing to happen to me but i thought that you guys might enjoy it you're damn right so we did so he's like that's not gonna be enough for this yeah this tank

i know this guy behind me hasn't even ordered yet. I know he's getting pizza from the gas station. There should be a law. Like, if you're ordering food at a gas station, like, don't talk. Yeah, that's true. Don't interact. This is not my time for chat. My questions are not open at this time.

Yeah, and it's not a restaurant setting where it's like, well, what else are you going to get up to today? I'm going to eat this slice of pizza in the parking lot. Yeah, if I'm double fisting taquitos, don't come up and be like, lovely weather. But like, that guy was kind of like, he was like, don't worry, I can talk about this because I'm also a fat guy. Tap, tap. I hate that when someone's like you and i like we get like we're fat and then you're like i'm pregnant i'm eating gas station pizza for two yeah i've never eaten i think maybe when i was a kid i had

like a 7-eleven hot dog yeah but i've never had any roller food like or like 7-eleven or gas station pizza or taquitos or any of that i've had at one point or another had it all i i'm not i don't eat well no i don't i don't frequent it but after shows at times if donair dude is closed i will have a uh skewer from 7-eleven they have chicken skewers that I enjoy. As a youth, I would eat fried chicken from 7-Eleven and it was disgusting, but also the greatest. Was it bitchin'? Yeah, I mean it was during the summer. One time I got a prepackaged turkey sandwich

from 7-Eleven. And I brought it with me. I walked a few blocks. I started eating it. There was an ant in it. And I was like, I'm not going back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm walking all the way back.

That's so Futurama. There was an egg salad sandwich that had something in it that Fry ate. I just bought this book about... Oh, also before I... It's so parkour as well. So, two things. I'm all scrambled. First thing.

Have a gummy. I already did. So first thing is they have really good snacks right now at 7-Eleven. I think they're called Dilly Chips or something. They're just, they're pickle slices in this little bag in the refrigerated area. Oh, yeah. And they're delish. pickle slices in this little bag in the refrigerated area oh yeah and they're delish and then the other thing you say you said right now as if like it's a seasonal flavor they just got it they just got oh okay this is exciting it's huge it's huge for me i'm gonna join a pickle group huge if true yeah huge very huge if true and then so the other

thing is i just bought this book um that's the philosophy of futururama. I'm only one chapter in, but it breaks down all the different philosophical and mathematical things that Futurama deals with and it's pretty sick. You've got to post this in the group. This will be your first Have you posted in the Futurama group or are you just lurking? Oh, I post

very frequently. Oh, nice. I never got into Futurama. Really? I think you would like Futurama. I bet I would, but I've seen a very active member. I never got into Futurama. Really? Really? I think you would like Futurama. I bet I would, but I've seen a few episodes. It used to be on when I couldn't go to sleep at midnight on Sundays. Yeah, if you like The Simpsons, you'll like Futurama.

Yeah, I just started watching it. I've seen all of them a million times, but I haven't seen it in a while. What about that one with the sad one with the dog? Is that good? It's so sad. That's one of the movies. Oh, it's probably an episode as well, but the movies are also really good. There's movies? Well, yeah, so there's

I think six to nine seasons of the show. Six to nine. High five it. Nice one, boys. Thank you. Bitchin'. What a bitchin' summer this has been. Yeah, and then there's, I think, three movies that are all really good, because it kept getting canceled.

Yeah. And then they had to scrounge for whatever they could get, I guess. Sure. But the movies are great. I loved the movies. Okay. I didn't really like the Simpsons movie, but Futurama, they did it right. This is really signal boosting some things.

I think it's going to get uncanceled again. Yeah. I hope so. Here we go. Final phone call. Hi, David Graham. This is Jackie from Chicago. I was just in Europe

and I was taking this train from England to France and this family got on and sat next to us and as the youngest girl in the group was sitting down in her seat, she kind of perked up and she was like, ooh la la, seatbelt. Yeah, I mean, I guess on a train. I mean, I felt ooh la la when she said Europe.

Yeah. Although you just went to Europe, the tropical Europe. Yeah, you went to Marnique. Oh, right. Right. Yeah, I love Europe. Did you leave the resort at all? We had an Airbnb, so we were not on a resort.

Oh, wow. And yes, we did. Not a lot. Like, we went to the mall. Oh, sure. But our Airbnb was on the ocean. Nice. Yeah. Ocean, you want to say? a lot like we went to the mall oh sure but our airbnb was on the ocean nice yeah how was the mall it's french yeah there was um a french mall i've never been in a french the reason we had to go to the mall is because they had lost

mace's baggage on the way there so he needed to buy everything cool yeah and then um i was as soon as we got there and all the bags were it was a pretty small plane so everyone we all had our bags and then mace is just standing there the pilot you could see outside the window kicking mace's bag all over the runway well yeah but mace had had a had a a really quick um like had to go from one flight to the other to get on this martinique flight so we we knew something was was shady and then we got there and he didn't have his bags and he was like oh my god and then so we were like okay well when is the next flight here and then they were like oh never we don't we don't this is the last flight yeah sorry yeah and then so he was like, is there something I can do?

And they were like, no, bye, thank you. No, you can go to Le Mal and pick out a whole new look. Yeah, so he was very, I mean, he took it pretty well. I would have probably lost my shit a little bit more. Yeah. But he had, like, I had packed some stuff for him, too, because I wasn't sure what outfits he was going to bring. And you like to dress him up because I wasn't sure what outfits he was going to bring so that helped.

Do you like to dress him up? I love to dress him up. So we went to the mall and there was a food court there and Mace got like a hamburger, Zach and Maya got normal stuff. I got a whole fish. They had a whole fish at the food

court and I was like oh I'll have the one whole fish please and then everyone was like in the game I'll have the one whole fish, please. And then everyone was looking in the game. And then the head, I could see that. It's from a restaurant called The Whole Fish. Why do you think we called it that? It was at the same place the Mace got a hamburger. They also have whole fish. And I could see that the head had fallen off the whole fish on the warming,

like the warming light. Who had fallen off? The head had fallen off, yeah. Excuse me, but this is not a whole fish. Well, then the lady picked up the plate when the head had fallen off excuse me but this is not a whole fish well then the lady picked up the plate when the head had fallen off and noticed the head fell off

and then picked it up and put it back on the plate and was like close to it sorry I kicked this around on the floor a little bit but it's here it's the whole fish

yeah so I didn't eat the head but it was actually delicious I want to eat more whole fish now okay what about the bones um it wasn't too bony like the bones are all in the middle of a fish so if you pick around the outside

it's no problemo new year's resolution eat more whole fish skin do you hate the skin oh yeah i love fish oh so there's this just yes or no no i knew a long-winded story about it because i got one so i there's a there's also a food place in the gym that i go to downstairs it's not touching sweaty people sure and they have these little sweaty people aren't working in the background i gotcha no so they they have this little salmon dish thing that i was really into for a while and i was eating it and i was telling mace i was like i got this this salmon thing at the gym thing and it was so good. It was such good skin, such crispy, delicious skin. Went back, got it again.

Are you turning my mic off? No, I turned off the phone calls. So I was like going off about how much I loved this fish skin. I ordered it again. I was eating it and it was parchment paper. They had cooked it on parchment paper and left it on. And then I didn't. And it was all oily from being cooked on it.

And then I ate it again because I loved it. I was like, I love this paper. I used to, when I was a kid, I remember one time we got these like caramels that were wrapped in some kind of paper. And when you unwrap them, my mom or dad was like, that paper is edible. And so I ate it and it like dissolved on my tongue and then I tripped balls. That's how your parents dosed you.

But then I, like every caramel I've ever eaten since, I'm like, is this the kind? They used to say that, I think about juicy fruit. Like there's a gum that you were allowed to eat. Your starburst or something, you're allowed to eat the the paper and i ate it for so long and then i again

found out you're not supposed to eat it i've eaten a lot of paper that's fine you're fine don't eat any more paper going for it eat as many whole fish as you want no more paper i love paper. Oh, I love paper. So fibrous. Yeah, paper's keto. Oh, is it? Oh, yeah, sure. Paper's bae. That brings us to the end of this episode. But I have so many

more stories. Well, you know, you have your own podcast. Yeah, yeah. Tune into the Stop Podcasting Yourself After Show. Yeah, the Stop Podcasting Yourself after show. Yeah, the Stop Podcasting Yourself annex. If you've somehow not had enough of me. You have your own podcast.

Yes. Obsessed with Sophie Buttle. And, uh, we talk about obsessions. Yeah, I've been on it. I love doing it. It's a great show. Highly recommend

the Graham episode. Um, and, uh, what else do you got coming up in uh this august september block your birthday's on the 7th yeah happy birthday people should send you pictures of their feet only if they're peeling that's all i want to see okay um yeah so i'm going to just relax in a couple weeks so it'll be over by Um, but people should know about it. Yeah, that's true for me. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And then, Oh, August 9th, I'm doing a one-off barely legal in Vancouver. Like one of the shows I used to run standup show at slice of life. And then at the end of August, I go back to Halifax for writing for 22 minutes.

That's great. Yeah. Congrats. Thank you. Thank you so much for being our guest. Thank you for having me. I also have an album. Oh yes. But I've plugged Yeah. Congrats. Thank you. Thank you so much for being our guest. Thank you for having me. I also have an album. Uh-huh.

Oh, yes. But I've plugged too many things. No, no, no. What's it called? No, no, no. I won't. A little bit of butthole. Yeah.

Yeah. And you can get it on all of the apps. Yeah. You've plugged too many things. You plugged Bachelor for 45 minutes. Yes. That's my passion. Also, if you want to eat a whole fish, go ahead.

Go to Whole Fish? Yeah, go to Whole Fish. And thank you, everybody out there, for listening. And good luck to the future bachelors and bachelorettes out there. And if you like the show, tell your friends and come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. MaximumFun.org Comedy and Culture

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