Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 599 - Caitlin Howden

Episode Date: September 10, 2019

Improviser Caitlin Howden returns to talk 5-star reviews, going to the fair, and country music.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 599 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who just can't wait until the 600th episode, Mr. Dave Shumka. You're not going to be able to sleep, you're so excited. Do you want to plan it out right now?

Yeah. Do the same as the regular episode? Yeah, regular episode, except i'll wear a fun hat yeah yeah uh we've been doing we usually like do something fun with just you and me for the 100 episodes usually yeah no maybe i'll get maybe i'll send you a cam that was the first 500 the next 500 the fans have to do something fun yeah do. Yeah, do something fun for us. That's a good pause. So get something ready. You have all week.

Yeah, you have a whole week. Do something you can craft. And keep in mind, you will disappoint us. You'll disappoint Dave. I think I'll enjoy it. I'm enjoying this idea. I'm uncomfortable with anyone doing anything for me. Remember, we did put out a request for somebody out there to make us capes,

and that never came to us. I don't remember. I do. Our guest today, returning guest to the podcast, one of our faves. She is a member of the Sunday Service. She's also one of the founding members of Blind Tiger Comedy.

And just all-around hilarious lady, Caitlin Howden's our guest. She's back. Back in a New York mood. Hi, guys. I thought you were going to do way more banter. No, no, no. We do live. We do way more banter live.

Oh, speaking of live, thanks to everyone who came to see us in Calgary last night. Yeah. Wow, that was a great show. Yeah. We were recording this before then, but I stole three library books. See if you can guess which ones. If everything went well,

I was there for less than 12 hours. Yeah. Dave's a real jet setter. He likes to just touch down right before the show. We're like the Rolling Stones. We arrive at the venue in separate convoys. We don't make eye contact when we're on stage. No, but you guys will get blood clots if you keep flying like that.

Why? I'm just saying, two flights in 12 hours. You're asking for it. Don't cross your legs when you land. I wear a big compression suit. I cross my legs when I land because that's the only way I can get my rocks on. It's the change in altitude that just goes wild oh really no but it is dangerous to fly that much dave maybe stay the day so what what is it like it's a short flight or is it just

the up and down it's the up and down oh what a way to go though on an airplane blood clots inconveniencing a whole plane's load of people doctor says i I have blood clots, but I'm not Jamaican, man. Story on MTV. Just not trying to make a band. Where are you? Can you believe he rapped that whole song with his mouth wired shut? I'm not sure I do.

Do you think it was a myth? No, he had his mouth wired shut, but I don't... Do we know the song? No. It's Through the Wire by Kanye West? Well, I knew as soon as you said it Because he's the only prominent musician

To have his jaw wired shut I think Oh no, Fats Domino But that was medical He was too fats Now was Kanye getting braces off And that's why he had it wired shut? No, he was in a car crash He was?

It's all detailed in the song Through the Wire by Kanye West. Oh, you know what? I couldn't understand a damn thing he said in that song. Oy, oy, oy. He has a boost for breakfast, an insurer for dessert. Dessert? Somebody ordered pancakes, he just sips the scissor.

There you go. See? But scissor is an alcohol drink, too, right? It's syrup. It's cough syrup. Cough syrup. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Should we get to know us?

Sure. Get to know us. What's your favorite cough syrup? You know what? You a Buckley's? No, obviously I love a Robitussin. Oh, really? Robitussin?

It's fun, and it's never as bad as you think. Yeah, you're right. After that first dose, you're like, I remember. Yeah, what was Iussin? It's fun. And it's never as bad as you think. Yeah, you're right. Like, after that first dose, you're like, I remember. Yeah, what was I complaining about? This is fine. My kids, they, like, if they get sick, well, good luck. We didn't vaccinate. Yeah.

When you say it, it sounds so stupid, you know? It just sounds so stupid. It's all forever. We all know it's a totally sound thing. But the kid's medicine now is delicious. But there was a kind when I was a kid that was so delicious that it came in orange or red, and it had like a little kind of like a stick man on the box. Oh, I remember that. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah and it

was so good no we were all like spoonful of sugar oh really yeah oh yeah i mean i still feel that way about vitamin c vitamin c for me is like a fun treat the orange ones you're like does anyone want a vitamin c if ever you come over i'll offer you a vitamin can i offer you an orange vitamin c anyone just a big bowl of vitamin just grab a cocktail i'll put a vitamin c Can I offer you an orange vitamin C, anyone? Just a big bowl of vitamin C. Just grab one. Would you like a cocktail? I'll put a vitamin C in a vodka soda. Oh, and then it'll fizz, maybe? Yum, yum, yum. It's the same way that I make

everyone use my face spray that I keep in the fridge. When you come over, I'll go, would you like a face mist? And I keep some lavender water in the fridge, and I spray my guests. Is it toned? Does it tone them? It's a toner. Yeah. So would you consider yourself like a natural host? A kooky lady?

Oh, sorry. Yes and yes. I love hosting. Yeah? I love when people come over. I just had my mom. I'm pretty stingy with the invites. Well, Dave, you've been to my house.

Graham, however, never been. But I can't be trusted. I'm an outdoor cat. I can meet been to my house. Graham, however, never been. But I can't be trusted. I'm an outdoor cat. I can meet you outside the house. We can just hang out on the street. That sounds fun. Yeah. I just actually had my mom, my Auntie Lori, my Uncle Rick, my Uncle Bill, my Aunt Carolyn all stay with me this past weekend.

Dream. Yeah. Lori and Will were on the air mattresses, two separate. My mom was in the guest bedroom, and then Rick and Carolyn were in a little guest suite we have in our building. Whoa. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. What does that cost to rent out?

80 bucks a night. Not bad. Not bad. Pretty good. In this city? You know what? Honestly, if anyone's looking for an apartment, just rent out the guest suite. What's 80 times 30?

Oh, boy. 2,400. Right? Not 48. Dave got there. He got there, but he got to the wrong there. That's all.

It's 3,200. Yeah. We were both wrong. We were both wrong. Yeah, you were both wrong. Oh boy. No. 30 times 80?

Oh, sorry. Oh, I thought it was 40. Are there this now 30 days in a month yeah no it's 24 i was right i was right you were right y'all i'm very good at math okay i will know i'm good if the numbers are like if they if i if they're all lined up if i get to choose them give me a multiple uh choice or i'm okay a b or c c correct um are you really good at math yeah i love math really yeah i think you maybe are the only person i know who loves math i think it's the only thing that makes sense in this damn world yeah that's uh yeah lindsey lohan said in uh mean girls

yeah that's true it's true same in every country and i think multiplications of 11 are really fun i just think it's fun and when you start multiplying 11 by double digits there's a It's true. It's true. Same in every country. And I think multiplications of 11 are really fun. I just think it's fun. And when you start multiplying 11 by double digits, there's a fun trick. Tell us the trick. Which is that, so let's say it's 11 times 13. Okay. So you take 13 and you put the one at the beginning, you put the three at the end, and then one plus three is four. And then you put the four in the middle. So it's 143. God, that is fun. Isn't that fun? That is fun. And that works all the end. And then one plus three is four. So it's, and then you put the four in the middle.

So it's 143. God, that is fun. Isn't that fun? That is fun. And that works all the time. I like fractions where nine is the bottom number. The denominator? The denominator, yeah.

And because it's like one ninth is 11. Two ninths is 22. Three ninths is 33. Oh, I love that Percent Yeah yeah yeah Oh I didn't know that Say that one more time

1 9th is 11% Uh huh 2 9ths is 22% 22% Don't die 3 9ths Well it's 1 3rd

It's 33% 4 9ths is 44% Oh my god This Goodbye I'm done with the podcast. You've given me everything I need. I mean, it's 11 repeating ones.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know how to do a repeater. But then you're rounding up later. So it's like, you know. See, isn't it fun? It's, I don't know. As soon as Dave kept going on with the numbers, then I started going like, what?

I understood it up until 33 and then i lost it yeah um yeah bad at math that was good at it and then my brain decided we're not participating in math anymore i was good at it it didn't have to do with the homework then i got put in the advanced math class yes and i was like i'm so good i'm in the advanced math class didn Ah, yes. And I was like, I'm so good I'm in the advanced math class. Didn't do any of the homework. They're like, here's your dunce cap. You're the worst in the advanced class.

Did you ever fail a grade? Or did you ever fail a grade, Graham? No. I got a D in something once. A D? Yeah. What's a D? Like a...

D is like... If you have to ask, you'll never know. Is it still a pass? It's still a pass. It's still a pass, yeah. But like a low... Ooh if you have to ask you'll never know is it still a pass it's still a pass yeah but like a low oh yeah low 50 kind of high 50 maybe low 60 yeah maybe it's a talk with mom and dad yeah um oh yeah but yet maybe it's don't take physics again do you ever fail a class no no no failed a class no you uh almost failed final year of math oh almost yes yeah i got that d yeah and they got degrees um but you were a good student i didn't have a choice my parents are teachers and so they knew my teachers as colleagues and it's so embarrassing so my parents were really

you know they would say things like uh shouldn't you be working on your math 36 project at this point in the curriculum my parents would say that to me too and i just wouldn't yeah you were defiant though i was lazy it's a magical combination i think defiant and though. I was lazy. It's a magical combination. Defiant and lazy. Yeah. Lazy and smart is a really bad combo. Yeah, I was lazy. Yeah.

But you were smart enough to figure out that you were lazy and knew how to get by. Yeah, I guess I knew how to. But I'm not smart. I would disagree with that. I would also disagree. Guys, I wasn't fishing. But look what you got. I was absolutely fishing. How smart do you got. I was absolutely fishing.

How smart do you think I am? And look at the bass he caught. How smart am I? How smart am I? Yeah, I think school is one of those things that I'm so glad that I don't. My brother's a teacher. My mom's a teacher. My dad's a teacher.

And I just. You're an improv teacher. And I teach improv, but not well. That's not what I've heard. I've heard you're a good teacher. Oh, thank you. Well, it's improv. Who told you that?

Listen, I'm an outdoor cat. I heard it on the street. Does Blind Tiger Comedy School have Yelp reviews? Thank God, no. Okay. Oh, we should start, though. No, no, no. It'd be really fun.

No, don't walk down that dark, dark path. Do you have Yelp reviews? I guess you have iTunes reviews. Yeah, I have iTunes reviews. Yeah, podcasts. Yeah, I't walk down that dark, dark path. Do you have Yelp reviews? I guess you have iTunes reviews. Yeah, I have iTunes reviews. Yeah, I haven't checked them in a long time. But, you know, occasionally somebody will be real angry about something. You used to live and die with them. Mostly die.

It would be hurtful to read a review. Because they're only one star and five stars. No one gives four or three or two stars. No, no one's thinking, oh, you know what? I'm going gonna go give a three star review it's kind of like with taxis work you're never gonna give a great review to attack you're not gonna go on yelp and be like that blacktop and checker cab i'm gonna give them a five star you only go down to give a one star review because you're pissed and you want

to hurt them that's true right you should there should be a rule where if you're gonna write a one star review of something you have to write a five-star review of something else. Yeah, yeah. Just to balance out the universe. And also, it would be good if taxi drivers were like podcasters and they're like, just give us a five-star review. It really helps in the rankings. Yep. Like and subscribe.

But the five-star review of a taxi is a tip. It's a cash tip. That's true if you have a five star if you've had a the best ride of your life you're not going on yelp and giving a five star review you're giving the driver five bucks i gave a five star review to my mead notebooks what explain this joke someone out there is cracking up. Mead five stars? Oh, yeah.

Very durable. Back to school. Very durable notebook. Have you seen the one-star reviews of national parks? Yeah. And other historic sites. Yeah. You can go to, you know, you look up, I don't know, the Grand Canyon on Yelp. Yeah.

And there's a one star, there are one star reviews. Like, too big, parking lot too far, not as grand as I thought, change the name. It's very Trumpian. It's like for years on Amazon, if you look up whatever, like your favorite movie or book or whatever, some classic that is universally adored. Too long. Boring. Boring. There was one.

There's a great Twitter account that collects great Amazon reviews, mostly of movies that people have bought. And the most recent one was somebody bought Rocketman, but they bought the Harlan Williams one, and their review was just, thought this was the other Rocketman. Where Harlan Williams is a... Is a spaceman. A spaceman who farts in his suit. Yeah. That was pretty good.

Makes me want to review this podcast after this. Go ahead. Yeah, do it. Do it to our faces. No, I'm a coward. Keyboard coward. Telephone tough guy. Have you ever gone online and reviewed, rated something?

No. Me neither. No. Five stars. I give everything. Have you taken an Uber? No. Not on my own.

I've backpacked on other people's Ubers. Always five stars. Always five stars, yeah. These poor people are just trying their best. And they're using their own car. And they have to clean it. And then there's always someone sitting in their backseat, which would make me feel very nervous.

Yeah. I don't like it when people, yeah. Someone's going to come and like strangle you with piano wire? Two very different fears. You're afraid of being strangled. She's afraid of being kissed on the back. What if someone just kissed you on the back, like thanks again for the ride? If they said bye daddy on the way out, I'd like it.

Bye daddy. Bye daddy. I think everyone should start doing that on their next Uber rides when they get out. Bye, Daddy. Thank you. Thanks, Daddy. I definitely, at some point when I was a kid, got off of a bus or something

and told the bus driver I loved them. So, sometimes your brain just is on automatic, you know, just saying things it thinks it should say and then you have to see the bus driver on the way home too hey hey look i meant what i said i just i uh about before i uh i want you to know that i didn't not mean it i i do i mean i love you but i hope anyways i know it'll never like i don't expect you to say any unless i'll be in row six by the window if you need are we counting rows on the bus now some of the seats face the middle just what are we where are those oh man yeah and that that and on the modern uh buses there's this this weird configuration where some seats face other seats.

Right in the middle of the bus, right? There's those. But now, like, the even newer buses have, like. The front and back? Yeah, they have eight seats that all face each other. And that's so that there's more room for standing. I guess. Right?

And less room or more room for standing. I guess. Right? And less room or more room for eye contact with strangers. And easier to get off so you don't like have to crawl over people.

Crawl over people who are I don't want to Yeah. I'm not moving. I have all these bags. Oh, but I've just I've made myself so comfy.

I hate it when you're in a window seat on the bus and someone comes on with their groceries and sits next to you and you're like I'm getting off in four stops.

Also, I think if you have excessively hairy arms, you should be conscious of that in the summer that your arms are touching people and you don't notice. I think that's a public service announcement from me to you out there with really hairy arms. You there with the hair sleeves. Has this happened recently? I would rather be kissed on the back of the neck. Really? Then the brush of hair again. Right now, I don't even want to talk about it.

Yucky. Itchy all of a sudden. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Me too. I literally just started scratching. Yeah, I have itches now. Yuck. It's been a while since you...

It's been like four or five episodes since you talked about bad stuff happening on the bus. Maybe it hasn't been that long. No. There's always something happening. Usually it comes up later in the show, I guess.

Are you a transit person? You drive. I drive and I'd rather walk than take the bus. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fair. I'd rather walk for an hour and a walk than take the bus. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fair. I'd rather walk for an hour and a half than take the bus. There's nothing good on the bus.

I always insist on standing and then I always fall a little bit. Yeah, yeah. Because it's like I forget that the bus is going to stop and I've decided to go hands free. Kind of like a dog that's trying to get their footing in a car. Absolutely. Or like a man who wants to accidentally rub up against the boob. Yeah, that guy. I've seen him.

Yeah, the hairy arms. But it is fun to stand on the bus and pretend that you're surfing. Yeah, that is fun. You know, it's really fun to stand in the middle, hands out, you know, in full warrior pose, and just pretend you're surfing. Yeah, kind of hum, wipe out a bit. Yeah. I was on the airplane

last month. You shouldn't stand up on the airplanes. It's fun. And I had a window seat, speaking of crawling over, and I said to the person in the middle, I said, excuse me, I need to use the washroom. And they just scooted, they just angled their body as though they wanted me to.

Describe this person. This person was nondescript. To say the least. I couldn't remember them. Kind of gray in color. Gray in color. Normal size human. Not too big.

Not too small. Just the size of Montreal. If you don't, I don't care. I'll pull down your underwear. And they were a man. And they angled their knees. And I said, I'm not climbing over you. I'm a grown woman.

Get up. Did you really say that? Absolutely. There's no way I'm crawling over this person. Yeah. Because where are you going to put your hands? Where's your butt? On his face.

On his face. And then, now you're face to face. Yeah. Because where are you going to put your hands? Where's your butt? On his face. On his face. And then, now you're face to face. Yeah, yeah. Or do you crawl over so now your butt's in his face? Yeah. And you're holding onto

the seat in front of you. And you've been holding in your tooth all night. My God. Lord, I haven't though. You can fart on an airplane. No one knows. It's not against the law.

I mean, everyone knows, but no one knows who. No one knows who. And also my farts don't stink, so it's fine. Okay, congratulations. Thank you. stink, so it's fine. Congratulations. Thank you.

I have a certain mechanical box that will detect farts and tell you you're wrong. A mechanical box? I don't know why it's not electronic, like a sensor, but it's mechanical. There's a crank. It buzzes and whirs. buzzes and whirs um yeah i've if somebody doesn't uh get up on the airplane then they're getting they're getting the front you go front yeah absolutely i'm gonna make this as uncomfortable for you as possible are you kidding me and i'm gonna make a face too maybe even breathe deep on the way out sorry um you're it's just your your back oh yeah well here we go my front to your front let's kiss whoops oh whoa it's i'm pretending i'm surfing on you now i'm gonna put my hands on your knees to brace myself

i'm gonna lean and i'm gonna push hard i hope it hurts you yeah i'm pushing in with my palms i uh what is that would you say that's your number one uh bad thing that people do on airplanes let's count down your top five yeah uh taking your socks off oh wow have you is this something you've seen recently? Yes. Wild. Then taking those dirty little naked feet and putting them on the armrest of the row in front of you. What? Rotten. That is, that's beyond the pale. Rotten.

I'm sure everyone's seen this video. It kind of went viral. Yeah. And it's someone using their feet to swipe on the in-flight entertainment system. And I think. On the in-flight Tinder. Wouldn't that be cool if you could meet someone on the plane? It would be great if there was an app where everybody logs on

and then everybody could complain about the person in this row or like, wasn't that hilarious when they tried to get the bag up? You know, because there's no chance of having that conversation. But if you all have the app. Yeah, like the Nextdoor app. Yeah. Just for the plane. Well, they have that.

That's my pitch, sharks. You can play games with other people on the airplane. There's some systems where you can play trivia. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or more often than not now. You just don't get a little screen anymore. Bring your own screen. Or bring a book.

You know what? Rediscover your love of reading. That's what I did. I read a book. That's right. Yep. Dave read a book this summer. You did?

Yeah. On a plane. The whole way? Two flights. And then a ferry ride. Yeah. And you read the whole book in two flights and a ferry ride? Yeah.

That's pretty impressive. Big book? Little book? 300 pages or so. That's a big book. Yeah. That's pretty impressive. Big book, little book? 300 pages or so. That's a big book. Yeah. Maybe 100. Oh, yeah.

Maybe two. No glossy photos in the middle either. No. Or were there some glossy photos? Was it like a meet me in the bathroom kind of anthology book? Oh, I haven't read that. Oh, yeah. I can lend it to you if you want.

I have it on my Kindle. Me too. What is this? I have the book. What is meet me in the bathroom? It's about the like early 2000s new york indie music scene the strokes the interval okay but it's um it's uh yeah it's it's it's what's it called what it's an oral history yeah yeah so it's different they interview

different people i like that i like an oral history. You know, the dirt. Sure. One of my all-time faves of the oral history genre. That SNL one. Oh, I read that SNL one. There was a Monty Python one that I read. End of list. I feel like it's probably pretty fun to compile.

Yeah. You don't have to write too much. Yeah, it's just all, this guy said this, let's find something that contradicts that. Yeah, You don't have to write too much. Yeah, it's just all this guy said this, let's find something that contradicts that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or let's say something else that's close to it.

Yeah. What does Lorne think about all this? What would be an oral history that doesn't exist that you wish? I thought we were

still counting down our top five worst things on the plane. We'll get back to that. Someone bringing on Burger King. Oh yeah, Burger King. Is that bad? Oh yeah. Stinks. Oh yeah,

it would stink up the entire cabin, wouldn't it? Yeah, man. Okay, I'll get to the oral history thing, but I also have to say, when people put their bags not above their seat, but they've put their, like, they use the overhead compartment in row two and then you see them walking all the way back. Oh, I do that. You do?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I've done it too. Yeah. Because if I know that it's full. Well, also if I'm in zone four or zone five, like so many people have gotten on before me, I don't know that there will be spots back there. Well, then check in 24 hours in advance and pick a better seat, buddy. I do check in.

The seats are all done. Like everyone's all done. I don't know what to tell you then. But also sometimes your seat and the zone have nothing to do with each other. That's true. That zone system is... But if everyone would adhere to putting their bag above where they sit... Yeah, but everyone doesn't.

But then you're part of the problem, too. That's fine. I'm looking out for me. It's the Wild West in there, baby. It is not. It is an airplane. It is civilized. It's the Civil West. It's the Civil West. It's like a shoeless Wild West in there, baby. It is not. It is an airplane. It is civilized. It's the Civil West.

It's the Civil West. It's like a shoeless Wild West. Oh, God. And you, previously in your life, you were a flight attendant. Yes. So you have, you're more attuned to these things. Yes, I'm also a mean old lady who watches people and goes, you idiot. Stupid, stupid kid.

You don't get any, like, you don't have any, as a former flight attendant, you don't get any, like, special treatment, or you can't, like, flash a badge at the other flight attendant. No. They say thank you for your service. Flash your neck scarf at the other one. Yeah.

One time there, I was waiting for the washroom. Thank you for your service. Flash your neck scarf at the other one. Yeah. One time there, I was waiting for the washroom. Thank you for your service. Do you ever go in dressed as one and get accused of stolen valor? Sometimes I wear the scarf. It's fun. But I was waiting for the washroom, and I noticed that their galley wasn't secure. And then one of them went and said, we have to secure the galley. And then I said, galley's secure.

And she looked at me, she goes, you a flight attendant? I said, I used to be. And then I got a free drink out of it. Nice. Yes. That's what it's all about. I would just say galley secure, no matter what. Yeah, feel free to use that, listeners, next time you're on a flight.

Comment on their secure galley. Yeah, also, what's a galley? It's where they keep all the carts. Okay, but the cart itself is a cart. The cart is a cart. How do you know if it's secure oralley? It's where they keep all the carts. Okay. But the cart itself is a cart. The cart is a cart. How do you know if it's secure or not? The little dongles above each cart should be down so that the cart, if there's turbulence, won't go flying into the cabin. Yeah.

Secure that galley. Galley secure. Okay. There you go. Galley secure. What do you hate about flying? What's your pet peeve? My pet peeve,

honestly, is people where one of them is... This is... I'm having fun. Yeah, this is great. When people put

their bag, instead of putting it in the short way, like handle out, they put it in sideways and take up at least two spaces.

What do you... How do you think this is supposed to work? Right? Go to a buffet. You want so much stuff. Also, if you put your bag in at the front, when you're leaving your seat, you're not one of these jackalopes. Yep, that's the right term. Like Jack Ching, but a Bing. Who's getting out of their seat and like oh i just have to get this

you can get out of your seat move down the aisle grab and go you're not slowing anyone else down you're making up for lost time i'm making a and i'm not slowing these jackalopes down also jackalopes are jackalopes slow i don't know what a jackalope is. I don't either. A jackalope doesn't exist. It's a rabbit with antelope antlers. It doesn't exist? No, it doesn't exist. What?

Oh, as fast as fast can be, you'll never catch me. Okay, what's that from? That's from America's Funniest People. Jack Ching Ba Da Big, the jackalope from America's Funniest People. Home people. Yes. With Dave Coulier? Did the voice Really scratch a minute For you there

Thank you So Jackalope isn't real No Dave Coulier is real No no no He's not either He's not No

Actually I haven't seen him In a long time There is a Canadian band Called Jackalope No Dave Coulier Is not Canadian But many people think he is

Because he wore a hockey jersey All the time And he time down on atlantis more center theater it was one of those on those rumble seats yeah yeah yeah that's a problematic relationship when you look at their ages back then huh yeah yeah yeah yeah um well it was a different time it was a different time That's the oral history I want to hear of their relationship. Just to, just he said,

she said. early days of Full House when everyone was fucking each other. But like, that song is oral history. Yeah,

I know, but that's, it's. But I want more. Yeah. I want more. But you know, you see what I did there?

Yeah, I see what you did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Feel free to rewind. Use that 30 seconds rewind thing on this iTunes app. And give it five stars.

And give it five stars. Yeah, five stars. Or on whatever device or whatever platform you like to listen to your podcast. I use Overcast. Do you? You can pick how many seconds it goes. I listen on Spotify. No, title.

Liar. Liar. You're a liar, Graham Clark. You're a liar. Good read. Thank you. Callback. I'll give you a callback.

What oral history? I told you, Full House. Full House, same? Yeah, same. It's what Dave and I have in common. No, maybe the whole TGIF. Oh, yes. That would be great.

Just the ins and outs of all those shows. Step by step. Yeah, because he, Cody, the cousin, he was a woman batterer. And also a kickboxing champion. He was in several kickboxing movies. You know what? After we record this. Sasha Alexander?

Is that his name? Yes. Which is redundant. Steve Urkel Show. Yeah. Name it. Steve Urkel Hour. Featuring Steve Urkel. Featuring Steve Urkel show. Yeah. Name it. Steve Urkel hour featuring Steve Urkel. Featuring Steve Urkel and his lover Laura.

Uh, it was, um, oh, everyone who's listening right now is getting really mad at me. Here we go. It was the Steve Urkel show starring Laura, Carl, the Winslows. Yeah. The Winslows. No. It was Boy Next Door. No. This is the best. It was. Do you remember the theme song for theows? Yeah. The Winslows. No. It was Boy Next Door. This is the best.

It was. Do you remember the theme song for this show? Yep. It's not Whatever Happened to Predictability. No, well now I don't remember it now that you say that. You had it. Oh, it's a rare condition. In this day and age, see any good news on the newspaper page.

You keep singing and wonder if the name of the show is going to be in the word. Some people think it's even harder to find. And now everyone used that 30 second fast forward. Well, there must be some magic clue inside these gentle walls. These what? Gentle walls. Gentle walls? Yeah.

And all I see. Is a tower of dreams. With real love bursting out of every scene. Here we go. The name of the show is. As days go by. The show is called Tower of Dreams. Tower of Dreams.

It's the love of a family. Family. Matters. There you go. I'm pissing. I'm pissing with happiness. Good thing I'm wearing a dress. Ooh, I'm wearing a dress, everyone.

It's summertime me. So like dresses in the winter. No way, Jose. No way. I'm not wearing dresses in the winter. Some people do. I know. Some people throw on a pair of leggings, throw on a dress. And there's where you lost me. Leggings. No way. I'm not wearing dresses in the winter. Some people do. I know. Some people throw on a pair of leggings, throw on a dress, and a coat.

And there's where you lost me. Leggings. Leggings no good? I can't. It drives me nuts. It is gentle walls. Yeah, I know. We know.

We sang it. But it's such a mumbling lyric. It's such a gentle walls. I hate tights. Really? I hate them. I've always hated them. Also, then I'm just walking around snapping the top of my pantyhose.

Fun. Yeah. You're making the case for them. Okay. There's another, according to this website, there's another version, like there's more lyrics than are in the song. Oh, sure. As the days go by, we're going to fill our house with happiness. The moon may cry.

We're going to smother the blues with tenderness. So do you think this was a real song or was it written for Family Matters? Huh. Like a lot of times these theme songs, they would write a full song and then they'd just be like, here, chop it up however you want. And then sometimes. It's like the cheers song is a full. It's a full song. There's more.

There's more. And the Friends theme became a hit and it has extra verses and stuff. And it's track number one on their album. Yeah. On the Friends album. Man, oh man. There was a Friends album. Yeah.

And Smelly Cat was on it. What? Nice. For sure. Yeah. I remember that. I don't know what else was on it. Smash Mouth.

Hootie and the Blowfish doing I Go Blind. Oh, because Hootie was dating Rachel and Monica. They went to a concert. They went to a Hootie and the Blowfish concert. But only Monica and Ross and Chandler because they were the rich ones. Chandler went because they were the three rich ones. Yes. And Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel were the three broke ones. That's right. And they couldn't afford the tickets. Rich friends, poor friends. Rich friends, yeah. It was the original title of the show.

It was My Poor Friends. And then they were like, let's just call it Friends. Or just Poor People. And there was a real fight. And they decided on Friends. Friends, yeah. It was more colorful. Yeah.

The font was better. That font. Iconic. Yeah. Why was there a dot in between? Because's friends is not it's not an acronym but it wasn't a period it was higher up yeah there were different colors still though were there six dots to represent the six friends f-r-i-e-n no there's more one for gunther yeah were they on the outsides or just they weren't before the F

Gunther was always kind of on the outside looking in weren't the dots just in between the letters it wasn't before the F and after the S I'm bored night night okay everyone go and listen to the episode

with someone you like when you were growing up did you watch Okay, everyone, go and listen to the episode with someone you like. When you were growing up, did you watch the TGIF lineup? Oh, yeah. Was that appointment viewing? You have Girl Guides. After school on Fridays, I went to Girl Guides and Brownies and did all that. And then you come home, and there would be a Macintosh toffee that had been in the freezer.

This is the most Canadian-like snack. Yep, and you smack the Macintosh toffee that had been in the freezer. This is the most Canadian light snack. Yep. And you smack the Macintosh. And then my family would split a broken candy bar and watch TV. This is so great. Yeah. What a sunshiny kind of childhood.

Isn't that nice? Yeah. Sometimes it was a score bar, which is also fun to put in the freezer and smack on the ground. Because then it's like... Your family's tough on the teeth.

Yeah. Yeah. These are all real sticky. Yeah, that's true. They're really sticky candies. And how long did you stay in the whole Brownies Girl Guides organization? Too long. Too long.

She made it to flight attendant. Long enough. I'll say this I got my period at a Girl Guides meeting and I remember thinking and you're like this is a badge

this is what the badge was for the badge badge the badge badge it's the blood badge no but that was the moment where I was like maybe I'm too old now for Girl Guides

oh really I'm a woman now what are the cause like after Guides there's like some kind of like it's's Pathfinders or something like that? I think so, yeah. I didn't do that.

Okay. I didn't do that, no. Girl Guides was it. That's it. You sold some cookies. Sold some cookies, got some badges, got a bit competitive, and then. How many badges? Tell me about the competition.

Well, no, I mean, I got competitive in the sense that I wanted to be, I wanted to have the most badges in my troop. Yeah, but who had more? michaela yeah michaela had a lot of badges and then i think i got to who i am now which is i didn't really like being around people and i didn't want to go and do stuff anymore yeah and uh that's what stuck the uh the badges thing like i remember trying to get just enough to pass you know what i mean like just enough that it wasn't like an empty because you had to do your sleeve was in oh you didn't have a sash that was boy scouts with sash oh and so when you were a cub you just had it on your sweater right and i was like i just need enough to make it look like i belong here but not so many that i have to work on does the boy scout cub store is that still open there was one on broadway

oh yeah i don't know where you would go and buy the badges you would buy you yeah i think you're you would have to buy your own bet or your parents would i don't know someone would buy the badge yeah but then you you would buy you could buy your uniform there if you didn't have hand-me-downs uh oh and like the because the socks had you pulled up the socks to your knee folded them over and there were little like tabs that oh see we didn't have there was no element socks secure yeah so there was no socks element there was i remember There was, I remember the socks, shorts, shirt, hat. I had a shirt and a hat. That was it.

Was it? Yeah, everything else was just BYO. Did you have a kerchief at all? Oh, yes, kerchief. Kerchief and a woggle. Yes. Yes. And then you'd have to go for...

Oh, yeah, nail inspection. Inspection. That's right, they would check your hat. I forgot about that. Yeah. I remember buying pins At the Boy Scouts store As filler

That you could put on your badge Or your sash If you bought some like Fun pins that said like Rah rah rah Or whatever it is Out of Canada Yeah

You could put those on And it made it look like You had more badges Ah that's smart Tricky That is smart There were a couple badges Did you ever get the TGIF badge?

No I never got that badge. It had just a fit Urkel's face. I'm trying to think of what they do, because I feel like there were a couple gimme badges. Yeah. They were just like, literally all you have to do is sign your name and you get this signature badge. I remember everyone played soccer or whatever. Yeah. There was a signature badge i remember the uh everyone like played soccer or whatever yeah there was a sports badge just get your coach to sign it that's right and then i feel like there was a reading badge yeah i for sure got it i i tried to get the babysitter

badge more than once i remember thinking like but i do it all the time i'm dying no kept losing the kids in the woods no No, I was really into the Babysitter's Club. The book? The books. And so I was like, I'm going to be a Babysitter's Club. And were you a fun babysitter? Yeah. Actually, today I had an audition for the Babysitter's Club.

Oh, it's a TV show? They're redoing the Babysitter's Club. Well, it was a movie starring Rachel Leigh Cook back in the day. That's right. And it was they're redoing it on Netflix as a series. So the circle is coming back around. If I don't book it, I'm going to be mad. Who did you, what type of role?

Are you a mom? Yeah, now I am. Yeah, yeah. Now that I'm in my early to mid-late 30s, I go out for mom. Early to mid-late 30s. I don't know if people don't know my age. You can always Google it, but by the sound of my voice, I could sound 20, 21. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Right? Audio-wise. Yeah. Yeah, right? Yeah. Yeah, I think now I go out for the mom roles.

Yeah. Although I just shot a TV show this summer where I played a woman at 22 and then also at 36. And when they aged me, they aged me to look 36. And I was so mad and I was offended. They added wrinkles and I was like, hey, hey, hey, that's not necessary. That should be, I mean, like the fact that your normal face is the 22 one. They didn't like. Yeah.

Well, let's say there was a lot of blush. Ladies, here's a bit of a fun tip. If you want to look younger, according to professional makeup artists, you curl your eyelashes, no mascara on the bottom lashes, and a bit of blush. That's the trick. That's the trick. And don't go for a brown blush. That's not. That's a brownzer.

Okay. That's a brownzer. Go for like a peachy blush. That's why they call it a brownzer. So not that's a brownser okay don't that's a brownser they call it a brownser so uh and that was it they didn't do any uh computer wizardry yeah what are you saying graham yeah i'm saying i'm saying you're so youthful they didn't need to do any computer wizardry well no that's what i said they put vaseline right on the lens oh yeah but to be fair there was it was i mean okay there wasn't a lot of vaseline on the lens. Oh, yeah. Okay, but to be fair, it was, I mean, okay. There wasn't a lot of gauze on the lens. It wasn't a Vaseline on the lens,

but it was a lens from the 70s. So it looked... When you were very young. Well, the show, it takes place from 1977 to 1991. Tell us a little bit about this show. Well, past guests, Kayla Lorette and Ebony Rosen

have written a TV show. Yeah. It's called New Eden and I shot it this summer we were out in Ontario for six weeks in North Bay Ontario in Brampton Ontario and in Hamilton Ontario

the hammer which is actually a really cool city and Brampton's the brammer and North Bay is no thanks you know what here's the Brammer. Yeah, and North Bay is no thanks. Oh, no, really? You know what?

Here's the thing about North Bay. What a dump. You heard it here first. Yep. What's the, I've never even, I don't think I've ever heard of the town North Bay. No, maybe you know it for its shad fly population. Oh, gross. Every summer in North Bay, millions of shad flies hatch from lake nipissing okay and if you don't know what a shad fly is often they go by the term fish fly or bugs with no mouths

um they go by that term they don't have mouths but two bugs are in love with like a black fly's mouth no but at least then you know that it's it's eating it has a purpose shad flies oh is that all our purpose we're just bags of food to you okay well num num num to me i am i wake up every morning and think what am i gonna eat today yeah fair but shad flies don't have mouths so they only live for 48 hours so their sole purpose is to live and then die but isn't that noble yeah no that's the most noble life imaginable there's millions of them and they cover the streets and they when you drive down the streets like main street and north bay you hear crunch and when they and it sounds like you're driving on bubble wrap. There's so many of them.

Sounds like you're driving on a bunch of frozen Macintosh bars. Why did they pick to shoot at this place? I don't know. It was a great location and tax credits. Okay. And when a shadfly pops, guess what it smells like? Fresh baked bread. No.

If it's born from a lake, what do you think it smells like? It smells like fish. Oh, if it's born from a lake. What do you think it smells like? It smells like fish. Oh, gross. Yeah, it was gross. Well, you know what? I've decided that I'm not going to go to North Bay. Yeah.

Our listeners in North Bay, we are not going to visit. We're canceling our show there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we disagree. It's not because of what Caitlin said. No. Your city's great. We love you. We have to because of what Caitlin said. No. City's great.

We love you. We have to do this, Caitlin. We can't. I've been to cities I don't like, but I can't. Name one. Name one. I cannot do this. Just say one. No, they're very.

Just say one. Chernobyl. Very haunting. Yeah. Yeah. Stinks. I Had to go around Killing all the radioactive dogs When does this

Television program Premiere? It's gonna come out On Crave Okay So Everyone's Like

You said You said that a year ago People were like I'll never see it Suddenly everyone has Crave You know why? It was right in the name Everybody says like

I got a craving All of a sudden And they did it Everyone got Crave now Everybody know why? It was right in the name. Everybody says like, I got a craving all of a sudden. And they did it. Everyone got Crave now. Everybody got it. In Canada. In Canada. And if you're in the US, get an IP scrambler, baby, and get your Crave account on.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cool. That's exciting. Yeah, yeah. So it's called New Eden. So check that out. It's about a cult. It's about a cult.

Yeah, it's about these two women who started a cult. And it's told from their perspective it's about these two women who started a cult and it's told from their perspective in 1991 while they're in jail love it so it's really yeah it's and it's a comedy uh it's written by kayla lorette and evany rosen they're also starring in it we'd love to get them back on the show tell them um to come visit i will yeah yeah they're both in toronto but they're they're lovely and they're wonderful they are two lovely ladies yeah two of the funniest people i've ever met yeah yeah hilarious and uh you know what congratulations to them on their success you know what you guys are a lot like the kayla and evany but like for men yeah that's true a lot of people say that yeah

yeah which one am i kayla and evany like you're a little bit of both you know what i mean the two of you together reminds me of them as a duo all right um we also have a show coming out on craig yeah it's called uh no one wants to give us old dogs no one wants to do anything with us yeah that's true um honestly i bet you people would watch this podcast if it was a tv show if you just put a camera right here and watch you two swivel around

yeah I'm very swively today yeah that's true kind of just do a Joe Rogan just to you know get two cameras in there we'll do some whatever he does MDMA

whatever we'll make Elon Musk snort a line of shat flies wait what? they do drugs on his show? I mean marijuana marijuana he smokes weed while doing the podcast usually before that's right with elon musk he made him do it on the show yeah really

yeah is joe rogan's show good hmm ah this is a this is gonna be a real this is a thinker i don't know uh you know it's very popular it's the popular. It's the number one. It is. The number one. And somebody, I was talking with past guest, Ivan Decker, and he said, like, now the Joe Rogan podcast, it's like the new Tonight Show. Like, an appearance on that, and you're set. Yeah. Really? Yeah.

Like, that's how big of a show it is. And I've listened to it when there's a guest of interest. Yeah. And it's long. It's a long show. Right. So it's like, you know. And that's coming from us.

That's coming from us. Exactly. Although it's daily, isn't it? It's daily. Daily. Yeah. It's crazy to think that he went from news radio, then started UFC fighting, and now does a podcast. He did Fear Factor in the middle.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. He ate some, made some people eat some shad for him, for sure. But what a mystery of a man. I know. If you were watching news radio and you were like, who's going to be the biggest star in 20 years? Phil Hartman, you would say.

Oh, boy. Yeah. I'm saying. Dave Foley, maybe. I'd probably say John Lovitz. Oh, sure. Oh, yeah. I only saw that season.

Was Andy Dick on that? Yeah. He was, yeah. I recently bought a cameo from Andy Dick. Oh, did you? Yeah. I actually sent Kayla and Evany a cameo when we wrapped the show as my present to them. And I made him make them a video.

It was, oh, my God. I cannot recommend andy dick enough oh really he gave a great cameo he sang a little when when graham and i did episode 100 of this show we there before cameo existed if people don't know cameo is a place you can pay 50 100 whatever dollars to a celebrity and they'll record a one minute message for you On their phone Video message But back in the day it was

Hollywood is calling And you would get a celebrity From the past To call you And leave you a message Or talk to you on the phone Mr. Belding could call you. So for our episode 100, I believe we had the professor.

The professor from Gilligan's Island. From Gilligan's Island. Now deceased. Wasn't there another one? One time you got Butch Patrick. Butch Patrick, that's right. Eddie Munster. You got him to call me specifically on my birthday.

That's right. And I could not get off the phone soon enough did he want to talk um so what else are you doing well i was i was at a show too and i was like oh i had to leave the room that's the best piece this together oh man it was like he was calling it 10 at night yes perfect but since then since cameos come along i had um chumley from pond stars uh congratulate graham on on defeating just for laughs yeah when there was that radio xm radio dispute yeah wait you got him chumley from from pond stars yeah the dumb one yeah yeah To send you a video after congratulating you that you guys got the channel back.

Yeah. Yeah. Man, I asked how much that cost. It was $15. Wow. Yeah. What a steal. And then I think for maybe less than $50 on Mother's Day, I got Spencer Pratt from the

Hills to send Abby a Mother's Day message. Oh, that's good. And he missed. He got our kids' names right said uh margaret and poppy margaret and bobby i think i think he got poppy right i think he got poppy right but it was either margaret or maggie yeah yeah yeah it may have been maggie maggie oh spencer what a time What a time we live in. Are you kidding me?

I mean, Andy Dick was 100 bucks. Woo. Yeah. A steal. A steal at twice the price. You know what? It was six minutes long. Oh, boy.

So it was worth it. Six minutes. Yeah. Of his time. 100 bucks. I would think it would be way higher than that. Six minutes of Andy Dick. He doesn't have to do six minutes.

No. I know, but when you just do that math. There are comedians't have to do six minutes no i know but you know when you just do that like there are comedians do the math there are comedians in town who are supposed to do five minutes and we'll give you 30 um well what does that work out to per minute oh i stopped i was i i didn't come on math you want me to do it yeah uh well you want to know per minute if it's six minutes yeah at five dollars no wait no six hundred dollars wait a hundred dollars for six minutes yeah yeah yeah it's four forty dollars and change a minute forty dollars and change a minute i don't think that can be right you guys i've had too much water i don't want to do math anymore. I've had too much water. Yeah, no, I get like that.

Yeah, when you're too hydrated. Yeah. Yeah. Dave, what's going on with you, man? Guys, last episode, I talked about how that afternoon, I was going to go to the fair. Oh, yeah, that's right. And we went. So, the last.

Yep, we went to the circus. So, last Thursday, I took the afternoon off work. Also took the morning off because I didn't record this podcast. Yeah. And... Just call it a day. Yeah. Well, it was...

Or did you go eat lunch at work? I... Yeah, it was like... Or did you go eat lunch at work? I Yeah, it was like I hate the crowds At the PNE So I was like Let's go on a weekday And we went at one in the afternoon

And parked the car And we were a little worried because it was like This is going to be a lot of stimulation Margot went last year with just me But this is this will be both kids we're gonna do rides yeah yeah last year margo did the ferris wheel and super dogs and petted a baby goat or whatever fuck what a day jesus this year she's not gonna remember it what a waste you're 100 right yeah yeah like we moved a year ago or not even a year ago we drove past the old house and i was like remember that and they were like no no no memories haven't

started forming yet oh yeah um so yeah we went margo the only thing margo wanted to do was cotton candy yeah that was her number one number one thing on her list like the moment we got there when are we getting cotton candy and we're like it'll be we'll be here for a few hours we'll find cotton candy and so we did the ferris wheel uh we had to buy like ride tickets because a ride pass is too expensive and if you have really small kids that need an adult to come with them like this kid's too small to ride on this ride alone yeah then the adult goes free oh it's the old reversal of kids eat free yeah nice yeah because i'm sure the adult doesn't want to be doing this everyone knows that yeah but they don't tell you that like i saw adults handing over twice what they had to pay and the carneys make up that they

sell those extra tickets on the black market eating those tickets for dinner so we went and then like poppy was too small to go on the ferris wheel and they were like and we were like oh we'll just fake our way through it and we totally could have like the guy was like well actually she seems too small why don't we measure her and she stood up next to the measuring thing, and she was way under. And Abby was like, well, I guess she can't go. And so she walks away with Poppy. And Poppy's screaming right now. And the carny's like, oh, where'd they go?

He was playing dumb. He was like, oh, you just have to measure, and then you can go on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, it's just the show of it. Yeah. Oh, weird. It was weird, but. He was operating under car go on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, it's just the show of it. Yeah. Oh, weird. It was weird, but... He was operating under carny law.

Yeah. Imagine how Poppy must have felt in that moment, being like, you bring me here, you get me this close to that ride, and then you walk me away? Yep. Oh, I would have been furious.

It's every day with her. Oh, yeah? It's her whole life. Yeah, that's true. She's a foot shorter than her sister. We're playing a game. We stop the game to eat something. I hate you guys.

And then after that, we found cotton candy. And the kids just went insane on it. Yeah, of course. Yeah. And then did you have to deal with the sugar that was in? Like, that must have been. Wait. The sugar and cotton candy

no it's just a spoonful of you know they need a spoonful of sugar to help oh yeah because it's

just this it's just cotton yeah but zoe de chanel likes it it's good

it's a fabric of our lives that's right uh and then there were a bunch of we it took us a while to find

like kid friendly rides yeah like we're not gonna just well that we legally can't have the kids go like on the big drop elevator elevator uh so we found like the merry-go-round yeah and then there was one that was like balloon a balloon but if there's a little, like you're in the basket of an air balloon. Oh, yeah. And you have a little steering wheel and it can spin the thing so fast. Oh, yeah. That's kind of fun. That's the one thing that I can't do.

I'm like. No spins. No spins. I can't. There's like 10 things that'll make me nauseous. No spins. No sins. No sims.

So I had to be like, okay, I'll walk you girls all the way up to the front of the ride and then I'm out. Because this child's ride will make me barf. Oh, yeah, but sitting in that little teacup and then spinning it while it's also moving. Yeah, yeah. Gross. Did you eat any really cool food? Did you and Abby get anything like a hot dog inside of a pinata that was covered in sauce or something that sounds really fun yeah it sounds messy but it is once you get that hot dog it's all right that that kind of fair food that like yeah look

what we've done no we didn't i like we had a uh doll whip Whip. That's a fun fair food. We had pierogies. Yeah. That's fun. Yeah. From Hunky Bills? No, I couldn't find it. He passed away? I heard.

I don't know. I never heard of him. What's a Hunky Bill? Hunky Bill is a legendary pierogie maker of the fair. Of the fair. Yeah, he'd been there for like 50 years or something like that. I never heard of him until he died. Really?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, I knew his stand. Well, it was a regular stop out of my in my fair days was he only at the fair he only worked summertime at the pne no i think he had also a ukrainian restaurant somewhere but uh it's hunky a um it was slur yeah he he there was some sort of dispute over the name at some point. Why? If someone's hunky, they're good looking. But it's something...

I think it's Bohunk. Yeah. Bohunk is what they... Oh! What they seem to refer to the guy in 16... The groom in 16 Candles. So it wasn't like he was beefy. He wasn't like a...

No. Like a looker. It was more... It was more not a nice way. He's Ukrainian. But he, you know what? He can say it. Yeah, I can say it. Yeah, you can say it.

I can't. Yeah. I listen to a lot of rap music that has the word bohunk in it. Ukrainian rap music. And by the way, I think. Not so in touch with my heritage. My favorite thing was basically like anything the kids wanted to do. We were just like, yes.

Face painting. Yes. And they, but some of the face painting was like over $20. And we were like, you can pick any of these ones or this one that might make you look really funny oh yeah yeah it's hilarious and they were like yeah we want that one and it was a it it was a unicorn the picture it gave on the uh example was of a 10 year old girl with a unicorn where her eye is the unicorn's eye a unicorn face around her and her nose is the unicorn's snout and it looks so messed up and so bad and we were like you can

do that yeah you can do the bad one so it's like a unicorn profile on someone's face and the unicorn eye is your eye okay and the girls both did it and they were great and unfortunately because they're not 10 year olds they're two and four they their noses aren't big enough for it to really look bad so right it still looked pretty cute yeah did it just look like a weird ant eater like a does it look like a unicorn they did a good job they did a good job in the picture it looked like a weird ant eater and that's why we were so yeah you're like come on dude do this do you and abby often select things that uh you think will be funny for you because your kids don't know um no well i mean we let them do like uh if margo leaves her room like we let her dress herself and if she leaves her room in a

terrible not terrible but like a really funny kind of weird looking outfit we're like great yeah let's do this yeah show these pictures at your wedding i think that's great that you let her dress herself yeah that's fun and then you get to be like. It saves time. Yeah, that's a little time. That's a little time for you. And she's like, she dresses for the weather. So it's not like she'll come downstairs in shorts on a snowy day. No, she gets it. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, that was.

And then we, you know, we petted animals. We went on a few more rides. There was one really good kind of rollercoastery one that I liked. It was kid friendly. And then went home. The kids rollercoaster-y one that I liked. It was kid-friendly. And then went home. The kids fell asleep in the car on the way home. Classic. Classic kid maneuver.

We were there like four hours maybe. And when we came home, we were like, hey, is it me? Or did that totally rule? Like there were no real meltdowns. It just went like the kids loved it everything went so smoothly uh we were very happy with it and then uh all it cost us was hundreds of dollars yeah yeah yeah because we said yes to every yeah yeah yeah but maybe that's the trick with parenting as as a non-parent is it just to say yes to everything in the middle they cry give them

cotton candy yeah i think that might have been yeah yeah but also how nice that you get to go and have a nice time because it is it's so hot there and there's no shade and there's so many people yeah it was a good like it's also this it's been good like not too hot weather all summer yeah you wouldn't know you i wouldn't know i've been in Ontario. Although I got home two weeks ago and it has been nice being like still nice. Yeah. Loving it.

Yeah. Although I did discover after coming home after six weeks that I'm the gardener and Chris is not because a lot of my plants are dead. Yeah. Yeah. What are you going to do? You know? Buy new plants.

Yeah. Easy peasy. You know what? Wait till next summer like they'll grow back you're the gardener i mean if they're perennials they'll grow back most of the yeah a lot of them are perennials um it doesn't you don't need to be a gardener to water plants well yeah but you gotta be a gardener to remember you gotta cut back the hydrangeas oh yeah i need help with need help with that. The lilies are out of control, and now they're just drooping all over the place. Oh, I don't know what to do about that with mine either. I know. You saw them. No, but I can help after this.

Give me some gloves. Okay. Let me just sort these out. Let me get out there. Someone give me a wide-brimmed hat, please. What are you, what's up with you? Please. What's up with you?

I went and saw a live concert performance, a country western show, at the Commodore Ballroom. Who is? This guy is called Orville Peck. Ah. And he's the masked country singer. I've heard of this guy. Boy, oh boy, what a fun show. Really?

Man, oh man. So he's masked? Yeah. He wears kind of like a Lone Ranger mask that has like a fringe that hangs over the rest of his face. Yeah. Yeah. Cool. And he comes out and like-

That's sort of your look. Yeah, totally. I saw myself in him. You definitely have a fringe over half of your face. Thank you. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And-

I have a mild fringe. of your face thank you uh yeah yeah and uh i have a mild fringe you've got some felt the uh um and he uh like you know how sometimes you go and see a band and they're like you the songs are good but they don't move oh like it's like seeing like a wax museum of a band this guy all over the stage left right yeah left right forward back all the moves yeah yeah um you know there were certain songs where he would just uh he just jammed out with a tambourine and like really let the the the band kind of show off jambo tambo and um and the the crowd was a real real diverse uh i've always said i love diversity but it's like i was going in i was like i wonder what this crowd because he's he's a young guy he's a gay guy he's very like there's not too many gay countries. Singers.

No, he's not open. There's one guy in Nashville. Right? Sure. Which is a historical document. The, uh,

but so it was this, this mix of people who are wearing like cowboy outfits, but very glammy. Yeah. I love that. It was great. It was great. And, like, cowboy outfits, but very glammy. Yeah. Oh, I love that. It was great. It was great. And some people just wore, like, standard kind of Western outfits.

There were a lot of people that were just in regular street clothes, but the people, I was like, okay, there's standard Western outfits, and then there's, like, these really fun, flashy, you know, glitter and sparkles and, like, a big bold colored hat. Oh man. I wish I had gone to that. Were there any just vests? There was a lady that was in just a

coconut bra but leather. Like a leather... I cannot picture what that is. I'm blown away. Yeah. It was It was a good looking band

Good looking crowd And at the Commodore I've never been There's the floor and then there's a balcony Usually if the show's Not completely sold out They'll close out the balcony So you know everybody stays on the floor.

But the bodies hit the floor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Seeing it, I went up in the balcony. Best place to watch. Yeah. No, nobody holding their camera in front of your face. Put your phone down. Yeah.

And the greatest thing is there was two tables on the balcony that had a reservation sign on it. And for the whole opening act, I just watched people walk up to the table and be like, Oh, these tables. Oh. Can you believe our luck? All these other people are standing around like idiots. Hey, maybe this. No.

Oh, look at this. And then, oh boy, it was the cherry on top was a group of gals that were clearly wannabe influencers just decided, well, we're just going to sit at this table. We're just going to sit down. It's reserved. It must be reserved for us. And they sat down and within 10 seconds, a waitstaff came over and said, out. Yes. Oh, I love it.

And they all had to like collect their things. Yes. And then stand. Yeah. And then figure out which way they were all going to walk. Yeah. Influence this. Love it.

That's the thing that happens on the plane a lot is people will sit in the wrong seat and be like, oh, am I in the wrong seat? Yep. Oh, well, I'm here already. Why don't I stay here? Yeah, I've already put my Burger King in that little pouch. Yeah, I've already tucked my toes

into the nook of the person in front of me. Did you ever find out, did you ever see who the table was reserved for? Yeah, eventually they showed up. Was it Frankie Sharp from Sharp Records? Yeah, they looked rich. The people that took it, I was like, they paid extra for that privilege of having that reserved.

What losers to sit down at a table at a cool concert. Oh, I love that. Why pay extra? But I would have, if there was an opportunity to sit, I would have done it. Sure, but would you pay $500 for a ticket to sit? Oh boy, do you think it was that much? If I had $500, I would get, you know, 30 minutes of Andy Dick.

If I had $500, I'd take my kids to the fair three times. Why can't you just bring your own little stool? You know what I mean? The little collapsible stool to a concert. Oh yeah, like you would like an outdoor concert yeah or maybe you could hide a a chair in your pants you know the that's an invention right like there's chair pants in some kind of comedy sketch but like also just like one telescopic leg yes you could just put out behind you and just lean on yeah oh that would be the best yeah but if someone walks by and trips on it and you just

knocks you and just you keep spinning around and the leg takes someone's eye out oh i want this so bad oh yeah because you could just lean on it it would be so nice and it would just kind of cup your butt. It would be like two little hands. Did you stay for the whole concert? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Wow. Yeah, stayed for the whole concert.

Watched the opening act. Local band Woolworm. And they were really good. And then... Hey, shout out. Yeah, a little shout out. And, you know, one song encore. Nothing, you know, like we encore, nothing, you know,

like we all had places to be. That's the way it's gotta be. Thank you. Yeah. Cause you want one encore cause it means that the show went well. Yeah. And I want to see, that's the real benefit of seeing a,

uh, an artist at the beginning of their career is like, yeah, you, first of all, you got to say, I saw them way back when in a tiny club. Yeah.

And you don't have to sit through their eight song encore. And yeah, because they've just got the one album, maybe do a couple of covers and then that's your show. That's it. Whereas if you're seeing NSYNC, their encore is basically an album. It's their hits. That's true. And also if you're seeing NSYNC, Justin's not there. Justin's not there.

And you can still sit down. Yeah. You can sit down for NSYNC, Justin's not there. Justin's not there. And you can still sit down. Yeah. You can sit down for NSYNC. Absolutely. Yeah, because you're at the Air Canada Center or you're at the Casino Royale Center. The center that was bought by the movie Casino Royale. Yeah. Yeah.

We got the naming rights for this for 10 years. Casino Royale Center. That would be a great name. Can we promote the next couple of James Bond movies? No, we've made all the signs. Yeah. Sorry. It's just Casino Royale.

Well, we didn't know you would make more movies. We didn't know there'd be more. Oh, why didn't you tell us? Why didn't you tell us? Do we want to move on to some overheards? Sure. All right. Hello there, ghouls and gals.

It is I, April Wolf. I'm here to take you through the twisty, scary, heart-pounding world of genre cinema on the exhilarating program known as Switchblade Sisters. The concept is simple. I invite a female filmmaker on each week and we discuss their favorite genre film. Listen in closely to hear past guests like the Babadook director Jennifer Kent, Winter's Bone director Deborah Granik, and so many others every Thursday on MaximumFun.org. Tune in if you dare.

It's actually a very thought-provoking show that deeply explores the craft and philosophy behind the filmmaking process while also examining film through the lens of the female gaze. So, like, you should listen. Switchblade Sisters. Overheard. Overheard's a segment where if you hear it, we want to hear it secondhand. And we always like to start with the guest. What a great slogan for Overheard. Okay, I got a great Overheard and it came from North Bay, Ontario,

which is why I had to bring up the North Bay story earlier so that this Overheard made sense. So I wasn't there, but a bunch of the cast was walking down the street i'm gonna go get uh dinner at east side mario's east side mario's and they were walking from the best western hotel where we were staying it's a five minute walk so they're walking down the street let's say there's six women walking together and a a car was passing them and someone yelled out the window and now as a woman you're used to being cat called or something being yelled at you but this was something i've never heard before the guy leaned out the window and yelled bunch of mixed nuts The guy leaned out the window and yelled,

Bunch of mixed nuts. And we were like, what an interesting thing to yell. Bunch of mixed nuts. Now, here's the thing. That could mean a lot. That could mean, wow, what a diverse group of women. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the movie Mixed Nuts. Yeah, or, mm, I'm hungry, would love to snack on you.

No, I don't think so. Or, what I like to think, he knew that we were a real handful. Yeah, I think that's, yeah. And that's what I think it was. But I just thought it was such a great. Or had word gotten out in town that they're making a TV show, and these are the comedians. Oh, yeah, but they weren't. Some of them

were real life actors. Real life actors? Yeah, yeah. Gross. They didn't just hire comedians on this show. I mean, there's a lot of comedians, but there's also some actors. Or it's also like was he driving over some shad flies and he thought he was driving over a bag of mixed nuts. So he was popping. Yeah.

It was one of those catcalls where we, like every day on set we would think about it and be like remember a bunch of mixed nuts. It was popping. Yeah. It was one of those catcalls where we, like every day on set, we would think about it and be like, remember a bunch of mixed nuts? It's like a compliment, really. This is the thing,

is that it really threw everyone for a loop. Yeah. It made us think about it and examine it and really open it up and, you know, I'm still thinking about it.

Yeah. I will be thinking about it for some time. No, I think it is like, boy, yeah, you guys. You look like a handful. Yeah, like what a bunch of crazy women. Yeah, a bunch of mixed nuts. I love it. Mixed nuts.

Isn't it great? It is great. Yeah. That was my elbow hitting the table. Yeah, you okay? Funny bone? Funny bone? Damn it.

I had a funny bone the other day. Yeah. Put it away. Can we do... Dave, do you have an overt? A guy drove by and yelled, hey, you want some corn nuts? Yeah. Single nuts.

And then he threw some corn at you. Oh, I wish I... I love corn nuts. I might go get some for lunch after this. Yeah, go have some corn nuts for lunch. Ew. Your mouth is going to stink. You know what I like about corn nuts?

Licking my fingers. It's like a second snack. So, my overheard is from the other day. I took the kids to Science World. These kids get to sit all. The last week, before school starts. Let's do it. Let's pack it all in. What the hell is

Poppy going to do? She's not going to school? Pre-school. Oh, yeah. Okay. Not every day. Some days.

Some days. Sunday. Actually, she's going to more camps in the summer than she's going to preschool in the year. It's going to be a

go figure. She's a real mixed nut. She's a go figure. She's a real mixed nut. She's a one mixed nut. Her schedule's a real mixed nut. But we, it was crazy at Science World. And so like the parking lot was full. We had to park across the street while we're waiting at the corner. I heard a guy on his phone and he said, so was it scary or no oh was it those little goats oh i thought it was the big

goats oh yeah yeah little goats not scary yeah big goat watch out where was he someone describing their dream to him i think yeah i think he was at that where's in there like a cafe where goats are up on the roof or something on vancouver island yeah yeah maybe he's one of those therapists that you can just talk to it's the app where it's like therapy on the go kind of thing and he's like okay well was it the goats that you were scared of in the past and he's the therapist he's the therapist are you holding a bag of m McDonald's? Yeah. Yeah, therapists gotta eat. You don't know where they are when you call them. That's true.

That's true. They could be doing something real weird. I'm actually at my therapist appointment right now. I go to a real one. Not a phone one. No, him. Oh, yeah. Whatever.

Yeah. Yeah, this show counts as therapy for Graham and me. Yeah. We're allowed to write it off that way. On your taxes? Yeah, yeah, him. Oh, yeah. Whatever. Yeah. Yeah, this show counts as therapy for Graham and me. Yeah. We're allowed to write it off that way. On your taxes? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Therapy. Therapy.

Can I write off my B&E visit? Yeah, sure. Yeah. Okay. Being a tax accountant? Absolutely. Yeah, it's family development. Yeah.

Well, I talked about it on this show. Exactly. Yeah. You needed it. Yeah. Yeah Well I talked about it On this show Exactly Yeah You needed it Yeah Yeah you had to do it It's family development And my family is

A pawn in my show Yeah Absolutely And they know it And they're grateful Tell me about the goats Graham Um They're big

They're scary They're not the small ones That I love That um Place you were talking about With the goats on the roof It's's called Goats on Roof. That was me who was done. Oh, okay.

Sorry. Hi there. It's called Goats on Roof? Yeah, it's in Coombs, British Columbia. Okay. And it's maybe the most popular bumper sticker in the province. What does it say? Goats on Roof?

No, it's a little, like, it looks like a little hazard sign, like deer crossing or whatever. Oh, yeah. But it's a goat pooping off a roof like a little hazard sign, like deer crossing or whatever. Oh, yeah. But it's a goat pooping off a roof. I've seen that. You've seen that. Wait, get these goats off the roof. What if they're thirsty and hungry? They die up there.

Yeah. There's a lot of dead goats up there. They're like... It's like insulation. They're petitioning the city to rename it Dead Goats on Roof. Is there a ladder they can get down? Goats are sure-footed. Yeah, they can jump.

They jump on the roof? Yeah. How big is this house? Huge. Seven stories. And they jump seven feet? They jump. Well, they're afraid to jump off the roof because they saw Almost Famous.

My Overheard is courtesy, speaking of it being the last week of kids just being in camps man oh man i feel like every time i get on the bus there's like a kid's camp also gets on the bus at the same time matching t-shirts um and there was one uh group of gals chatting away and they were talking about grade five which was probably last year and uh one of them said oh really all i remember from grade five is fiona had a box of crackers in her desk a whole year and that's all you remember that is a failure for the school yeah that is that's not great not great guys It's great for Fiona though Yeah

Her giant I assume giant box of crackers Yeah Maybe she had a tummy ache Maybe she just always had Those premium plus crackers Could go for some of those Oh god

Give me a sleeve Yeah Exactly If I could go to a bar And just order a beer And a sleeve of premium plus crackers And a fresh sleeve So they're not stale

Yeah yeah Oh that's a great idea Two bucks Two bucks. Two bucks. A sleeve for two bucks? Why not? It's a bar. Everything's $8.

Okay. No, not at this bar. Yeah, no, that's right. This is a different bar. Not at our bar. What, is that your favorite cracker? I mean,

if you had one cracker. One cracker for life. Ritz. Ritz. Trisciscuit triple baked that's where the try comes from really yeah i love a triscuit i love oh no wait i like shreddies i mix them up no i like shreddies and i only like shreddies when they're in bits and bites and they're covered in the garlic salt yeah oh you know when you would get the one shreddy, that's just, it's almost wet with salt.

Yeah. Oh my God. The accumulated salt of all of its ancestors. Yeah. All of its partners. Oh, and it's just like. Yeah. When you eat that shreddy salt, you're eating the salt of every shreddy it's ever had sex

with. And you want to take your time. And then you look in the bag, like maybe there's another, but there's not. There was just that one. That's right. And it's ever had sex with. And you want to take your time. And then you look in the bag like maybe there's another, but there's not. There was just that one. And it's like hard? It's hard and it's so salty. I don't like that shreddy.

It will save them for me. I don't have a lot of bits and bites these days. You don't? No. It's a great snack. It is a great snack. Healthy. Well, they're baked, not fried.

And your mouth never knows what you're going put in it that's right and you can use the pretzel sticks to scoop up the cheerios you put it right in the middle fun yeah it is fun what are the components cheerios pretzel sticks shreddies are the weird kind of oblong or like it's it's like a little bread oh Oh, yeah. Those cheese. What were they called? Not Cheez-Its. Like a mini breadstick. Yeah. Yeah. That's the loser.

Yeah, no one wants that one. But I love the pretzel. I like the flavored Cheerio. Yeah. Sometimes the salt gets stuck in the middle of a Cheerio, and you think, wow, this dinghy is filthy. Somebody get this gal a salt lick. Oh, my goodness.

I wish. I'm a salt girl. Yeah. Give me savory. She's like a... If I was driving by, I would have been like, look at this collection of bits and bytes over here. Thank you.

That's a compliment. Now, we also have overheard sent in from people all over the map. If you want to send one in, you can send it in to spy at maximumfun.org. This first one comes from Scott in Omaha, Nebraska. This is more of an over-experienced, but I spent the weekend out of state with family

and the five-year-old boy who loves me saw me with sunglasses on and said to me completely straight-faced, you're not Scott. You're someone else. You're always trying to trick me. I hate you. Wowee.

Yeah. Yeah, Scott, stop trying to trick everybody. Yeah, take off your sunglasses around your family. Yeah. You're having dinner.

Well, this guy's not, Scott. But it is at a jazz restaurant. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Jazz restaurant. A jazz restaurant where you can buy a sleeve of crackers for $2.

Dream come true. Oh, boy. I'm here for the breakfast special. We have jazz all day. Breakfast till 11. Why not? Why not? This next one comes from Alexander A.

This is overheard. My own daughter playing in her room uh she's just by herself and she's saying i love you and value you green goblin you picture the parent just shedding a tear Being like yes I've taught her well We all must play our role Green Goblin is just as important We need an enemy We need a bad guy That's true

You know If this new Joker movie proves anything It's that we all need a bad guy That's the slogan How old is this daughter does he say? Does not say But he does say she has no Green Goblin toy So your guess is as good as mine That guy. Yeah. That's the slogan. How old is this daughter? Does he say? Does not say. Does not say. But he does say she has no Green Goblin toy.

So your guess is as good as mine. It could have been a booger. Yeah, that's true. I love you and value. Yeah. Always suspect a booger. Is that Joker movie out yet? Nope.

But, you know, it'll be out soon enough and we'll all get to watch it? Robert De Niro's in it. Yep. He plays a character who hosts a TV show because he has to be looking at cue cards. No, is that true? I mean,

like, it's a perfect fit for him, isn't it? I'm kidding, yeah. He should do more improv then I don't know that I want to see Robert De Niro's improv I feel like every actor who acts with him now has to be wearing a suit made of cue cards yeah just wearing a t-shirt with all the lines

on it and they're on some sort of lift so that his eye doesn't change so they stay on this thing that lifts him up slowly. So they're wearing like a teleprompter? They're a human teleprompter.

So, Robert De Niro, your motivation is that you're squinting. Yeah. You're squinting, it's sunny out. You know what,

let's give him some sunglasses. Yeah. I'm actually surprised he doesn't act with more sunglasses on. Yeah, that's true. Well,

he did audition to play Rey, but they said not right. Too soon. Um, this last one comes from, uh,

Cuba, K U B A in, uh, Poland. Ah, yeah. Holly. Uh,

what does that mean? That's, that's the place. Oh, uh, I'm on vacation in Poland and have some Polish overheards now this is translated from Polish

and he says this is hard to translate because Polish has a very unique relationship to curses and expletives and this is his dad to him hey son pass me a peach so I can keep sitting and eat that fucker.

Yeah. Cool, Dad. Cool. Pass me a peach so I can keep sitting and eat that fucker. Man. I'm going to try and eat that fucker. Man. I'm going to try and worm that into my everyday catalog. Absolutely. I have some peaches upstairs.

Yeah, pass me a drink so I can sit here and drink that fucker. So I can keep sitting, right? If the city is like, well, I don't want to get up. God, that's so cool. Well, it's a beautiful language. Thank you Hello What is this? Hello is

Hello I think And thank you means Thank you Okay Or I'll just check with my ancestors I don't know Yeah it's cool

They appeared to me in a vision I taught improv in Warsaw a few times Really? Yeah Wow And in a place called Konstantin, which is just outside Warsaw. Cool. Warsaw.

Oh, I'm here to suck your blood. Polish vampire. You know me. Now that's a Twitter handle. Polish vampire. And it's all just jokes about how he's bad at sucking blood. Yeah, he's putting blood into you somehow. And how expensive the salad is. Yeah, he's putting blood into you somehow. And how expensive the salad is.

Yeah, upside. Oh, yay, yay. Because if it's not meat, everything is expensive in salad terms. I found fruits and veggies really expensive in Warsaw, yeah. Yeah. But my God, is the vodka ever good. Really? Oh, so good.

Oh, and there was this one soup. It was like a sour soup. In addition to overheards that are written in we also accept your phone call there was an egg in it oh was it ramen no sour maybe uh if you want to call us our phone number is 1-844-779-7631 that's one spy pod one like these people have speaking of cue cards i love this part hey dave and graham this is ann calling from boston i was in salem the other day and i saw one of those tri-corner hat gentlemen leading a tour but he was only leading one man with him and it was the end of the tour and he said okay um so do you have any questions for me and the guy looks at him he's like yeah actually i have quite

a few questions he says okay what is it because how do you remember all those dates, names, and facts? All right. Thanks so much. Love the show. Off I go. How do you do it? This has been bugging me the whole tour, but how are you doing this? Are you a witch?

Yeah. Talking of cue cards, maybe they had cue cards. Yeah. How many things do you think you could memorize for like a walking tour? Boy. I mean, if it was. If I grew up in Salem and knew a lot of witch facts. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Then you'd be fine. You'd be like, this is where. Yeah, this is where I went to elementary school. This is where Fiona had crackers in her desk like if it was now not much but if i was 16 and i did it when i was 16 and i could i could probably still remember it now oh man going on a walking tour led by a 16 year old so she was talking about he was doing a walking tour tour for one person if you showed up to a walking that's just a date yeah If you showed up to a walking tour. That's just a date? Yeah, if you showed up to a walking tour and no one else was there, would you be like,

I would like my money back. Please, I want to be a member of this group. I'm sorry, Tri-Corner Hat Entertainment does not do refunds. I don't want you looking at me the whole time. I want to be one of the ten faces you're looking at. I want to, at one point, tune out, maybe walk away,

leave, because it's boring. Sneak away from the tour. Yeah. Yeah. So I signed up for the ghost tour because someone said, you got to do it,

it's great. And then I realized they are stupid and there's no such thing as ghosts. Or there's no such thing as tours. Think about that.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. If it's just a guy on a street walking around. You know, you could follow any lunatic. A guy in a tri-corner hat on a Segway. Yeah. Someone give me an umbrella and follow me.

I'll show you something. Salem Witch Trial Segway Tour. Very bumpy planks to walk over. There's only one Segway though So the tour guide's gotta run Also, that's witchcraft Segways? Also, you tell me that the inventor of the Segway

Didn't die on a Segway That's weird, you know what I mean? Not meant to be Inventor of the hospital probably died in a hospital Hello Dave Graham and lowly guests I am at an Ikea right now And I just overheard two kids playing at some desks, and one of them said, I'm a gamer. I do YouTube videos.

And the other one said, that's amazing. I also want to be a gamer. Man, it's like a legit career. Yeah. Yeah, and it's what a time to be alive. Like, growing up as a kid, It's like a legit career. Yeah. Yeah. And it's what a time to be alive. Like growing up as a kid. We thought like that you had to pick a stable job like podcaster.

Yeah, exactly. Podcaster. Comedian. Improviser. Improviser. Yeah. Improv teacher. These were the careers that were presented to us. Who works once a year.

You know, something. Yeah. Stable. But how much is a TV actor supposed to work? You know, Paul Reiser only worked that one, he just did that one show.

That's right. He wasn't doing Mad About You and then Mad At You, the sequel show, and then the after show, Mad About That, where he would discuss

what happened. Or the prequel, Something's Up. I'm about to be mad at something. I'm not feeling in a good mood, to tell you that much. My back hurts.

Angry guy. Here we go. Final forward call. Hi, guys. I have an overheard and an overread. I was on the trolley this morning going to work, and the gentleman in front of me's phone notification, which was the Little Mermaid song, went off, which caught my attention.

So I looked at his phone and he had a text from a woman that said, I'm good. And he was writing back to the woman who texted him and he started to write i want to feel your love and then he deleted it and wrote i'm great oh wow wow why did he delete it oh no he made the right choice you think yeah because she's like I'm fine and he's like I want to feel your love what if he accidentally pushed send

you know what I mean what if he accidentally pushed the Dracula emoji and then put send and like the the like

syringe full of blood emoji. Oh boy. I want to feel your love. Also, what? You don't text that. Not that I'm good. How are you doing? I'm good. I want to feel your love.

What is the Little Mermaid song? Because I immediately pictured Le Poisson. That's it. That's the one of them. Yeah. Because I immediately pictured. Les Poissons. Les Poissons. That's it. That's the one. Under the sea. Under the sea. But there's also Poor Unfortunate Souls, which is part of your world.

Part of your world, yeah. All great hits. All hits. The weird sailor song at the beginning. Yeah. That's not. Don't worry about it. Two legs, no pegs.

And the King Triton Suite. don't worry about it two legs no pegs um and the king king triton suite yeah and that weird like the sisters all introducing themselves oh yeah those the sisters seducing themselves

yeah yeah introducing themselves yeah we are the daughters of triton I don't remember this song and then

like I've seen this movie a lot in the last few weeks. Oh yeah. You have daughters. And they all introduce themselves. Our father who named us well. Oh, okay.

And then they go through all their names. And then, here comes Ariel. No, she's not there. She's, you know, exploring. Oh, she's got her nose in a book. Yeah.

And a fork in her hair. No, it's Belle. Well. How do you do? My name's Gavroche. These are the people. Here's my town. Just watched it on PBS.

Oh, the live one? Yeah. I love it. What is it? One of the Jonas Brothers. It was great. One of the Jonas Brothers is in Les Mis? Is he Gavroche?

He was not Gavroche. Nick could be a cute Gavroche? He was not Gavroche. He's... Nick could be a cute Gavroche. I believe it wasn't Nick. Anyways, it was one of them. It was one of the three. I doubt it was Joe.

Did he have a Cockney accent like all of them? No, he was singing in an American style. He was Marius. The guy from Little Britain

was the landlord. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It was yeah. Yeah. It was great. And you know what? If it was on right now, I'd be watching it again. Yeah. What a treat.

I've got some vacation time coming up. I think that's what I'm going to do. I love it. I love that they sing into microphones. It's the best. What? What? You're going to do?

You're going to watch Les Mis? The weird... What version is this? This is the 25th anniversary Special from the O2 arena Yeah I got some days off I'm going to take September 22nd to September 25th off It's my vacation this summer

I think I'm going to watch some PBS And I'm going to find this Les Mis I'm going to watch it in the morning too It's man it's a treat No matter what time of day I can't wait Caitlin that brings us to the end of this podcast. You can be seen every week at the Fox Cabaret as part of the Sunday service.

Every week, every Sunday. And you are starring in a television show that's coming out on Crave. Do you know when? Hopefully, end of this year. We're looking at maybe Decembercember or january of uh next year that's so exciting yeah it's uh it's fun it's it's uh it's been a really great year yeah and thanks for having me back on the podcast guys any time once a year once a year once a year anytime around this time yeah great every 52 to 56 weeks you know what i? I'm free. Okay. Yeah.

Well, I know you have four days off in September. You're going to watch this thing. Well, now that I know where you live, I'll come over. Oh, sure. Yeah. Bring a copy of the Les Mis from Live at O2. Yeah. And then you bring the Chex Mix or whatever.

Bits and Bytes. Bits and Bytes. Melly Mellow. And you stay home. I'll stay at home. Sounds great. It's everything I want. We talked a lot about Canadian things today. Yeah.

Just because we are, we have to remain the most Canadian show on Maximum Fun. That's right. They're coming for us. Oh, that's true. I know. New Canadian show. Well, thank you everybody out there for listening. If you like the show, why not tell your friends and come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. MaximumFun.org

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