Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 637 - Mark Chavez

Episode Date: June 1, 2020

Improviser Mark Chavez returns to talk cigars, cinnamon buns, and 90 Day Fiancee. Plus, the final edition of the Bradley Cooper Movie Club presents Aloha.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka, and he's Graham Clark, and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everyone, and welcome to episode number 637 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who, uh, his room looks like all the lights are off and he's got like a faint glow from the computer and it looks real cozy over there, Mr. Dave Shumka. Uh, it's not a computer glow, it's a desk lamp. See there, I turn it off and I'm gone.

You're like the Night Stalker or something. I have a faint computer glow on the other side, but if I turn that off, then it is... I'm just in... You're just in the netherworld. I'm just going to disappear out of this window and show

up in yours and start fingering your stuff what well like your uh belongings yeah and i'm back and our guest today uh he is a member of the sunday service that has been doing weekly shows online uh a lot of the time joined by a past guest uh paul f tompkins uh it's the hilarious mr mark chavez oh hi hi everybody how is everybody thanks for joining us thank you for having me i'm so glad to be here i put up the same background that i use for the sunday service which has a little lights on the back that's cool cool. It also sound dampens, right? Putting a curtain up? I guess so. Yeah.

Scream. Yeah. Ah! I can't. I live in a... No, I do anyway, though. I'm not very... My upstairs neighbor, we've given her gifts because of how...

How noisy are you normally? I've heard my voice carries. Because I have kind of a deeper voice that just kind of like goes through like walls and they can't hear what i'm saying i can't hear any of my neighbors uh voices i hear thuds a lot of the time that sound like somebody's just keeled over uh both of you where are you in the like tops and bottoms like our full what floor i'm on second floor a second out of how many three okay i'm on the first floor and there's a basement but there's no apartment below me there's one above me and then i've kind of lucked out there's we have a next door neighbor but they're gone during this whole pandemic do you hear stompings above no this

really terrible thing happened once i've been here for like five years and we were like, wow, the sound must be so like, really like the sound dampening is really great in this building. So we don't hear anything. And then one day we heard like a penny drop upstairs. It's like, ding, ding, ding, ding. Like, oh my God, they hear everything. Like, I think we just have really quiet neighbors. Oh yeah.

How about you, Graham about you graham with the with the stomps and we'll go around everyone i always hear the stomps from below there's nothing up top but from below is where i'm hearing a lot of thuds a lot of sound like they are ceiling i don't know maybe they are maybe they're they're uh you know lion Richie. Did he sing Dancing on the Ceiling? Yeah. All right. They're a real bunch of Lionel Richies. So you hear thuds below. Normally you'd hear thuds above and chuds below. That's right.

Bros before hoes. And then buds hang out with you. Yeah. You guys want to get to know us? Yes. Yes. get to know us yes mark how has this whole crazy thing how the hell have you been you son of a bitch it's been great it's such a funny question to ask like like how is it like fine fine because i think like some people um are really thriving in this time and then other people have you know it's just like

collapsed every thing they can rely on, you know? Yeah. Yeah. It's collapsed a lot of what I could rely on. Uh, cause I do, I do theater and that's just gone. Um, yeah.

So that's been weird. My wife is a theater director also. So that's that whole side of like, that is gone. Um, I know you, you deal with a lot of comedians on your show and you're a comedian, you know, so there's live comedy has gone too, but there's other things you can do in that area. I don't,

but a lot of my life has just been exactly the same, like, because I work from home a lot. Right. So I'm just doing what I've been doing with the exception of like suddenly having to learn how to type live stream stuff and type yeah learn how to type yeah learn how to use a computer i wonder what in like because in high school uh typing was a skill i think we learned it in elementary school actually but yeah they tried to teach me i learned in school and i did not want to hey i learned my home row i i you know i briefly dated mavis beacon and i wonder what the kids today are like because they'll be past that by the time they get to whatever grade is so will

they be learning you know how to set up a live stream they'll be learning t9 on on sure how to text on their telephone their old timey texting texting remember t9 no what's t9 t9's the code it was uh it was a it was this weird way to text where you could do it i was really good at it because you could do it without looking it was when you had to use the numbers one or two through nine number pad like texting ability that would that was very predictive of what you would write so you'd be like three three two would mean a certain word oh yeah if you wanted to type dave it would be you know uh three two three two eight eight eight 3-2-8-8-8 8-5-3 I know a guy who teaches elementary school and they've

taught them streaming and podcasting and just a bunch of stuff that the kids are into. I don't know if they taught them TikTok. In place of something? In place of history. In place of globe awareness yeah those who don't learn tiktok are doomed to reveal it you know what's weird about tiktok is uh like almost all the clips i see from it are young

people but occasionally a couple really old people will sneak in and i feel like it's a real democracy over there now you you're on tiktok i'm on tiktok but i've never posted a tiktok i'm terrified but do you how do you how do you do it like do you follow people or is it just you get yeah you follow people and um and then like a lot of them are people copying other people yeah um but like that's a thing that you're supposed to do like you cut or is it no it's just a lot of it's repetitive oh yeah or like i saw a guy you know bouncing uh ping pong balls off his pots so now i'm gonna do that yeah and now i'm gonna do the difference between tiktok and vine and is it the same thing is you can use uh music that like is licensed by tiktok so you can pick any song that you can think of and then it you can do it on tiktok will pay for it and you will do a lip dub to it right i

whereas vine hasn't existed in 10 years that's true that's where i stopped vine went away and i was like, I can't anymore. I don't know how to do anything. I remember reading an article by maybe Rolling Stone about the Vine stars of tomorrow. And I think the Vine app stopped like six months after that. Oh, that's so sad. Well, you know, they were trying to get away with

not working their whole life. Anyways, everyone's so sad. Well, you know, they were trying to get away with not working their whole life. Anyways, everyone support the podcast at MaximumFun.org slash donate. No, it is a lot of work, guys. Yeah. I could stop this today. I won't. You could just stop doing the podcast. I could stop doing it.

I'd have a lot more time yeah that's true and then you could you finally learn that martial arts that you've always been yeah i learned kung but i i never got around to foo foo's very withholding um so what what have your days kind of look like well i, I wake up, do my calisthenics, sweep my porch, then I get a coffee, then I say hi to everyone. Where do you get your coffee? Hug everyone. There's a matchstick coffee just down the street here in the west end vancouver

where i live i go there they know my order it's turned into that say americanamisto yeah thank you sometimes i get eggs from them because they sell they have like everyone's kind of like doing groceries now too so i'll get when the pandemic first hit and we were all supposed to stay in our homes at all times did you cut out that part of your day did you make your coffee at home yeah oh no i make coffee at home every day anyway and then i started i that was my one little thing that i would do to like support a restaurant and leave the house yeah yeah yeah was to do that and uh because i'm a hero um i do that i started you know what people are talking about like the heroes and all this and no one is getting no one's giving mark chavez enough credit it's

true it's true nurses i also clap at seven so i've done i've done everything but i can't um and you know we we should remember the real heroes which are you know your spider-mans and uh the hulk i mean the hulk destroys a lot of stuff yeah without people going out and like you know uh getting into big bus crashes and whatever there's really nothing for a spider-man to do these days and it's sad you know with with the hulk like it's i'm never gonna be a superhero actor now like like because that's the only chance i ever had was the hulk was being was being david banner because you know you like mild like just a regular guy yeah you know like that was my my only what other superheroes like could i possibly have acted i feel like you could have been one of the x-men you know like one that you're like i don't know what he does like laser does the laser ring yeah maybe one of the shreks man

yeah it's the shreks man oh man i always forget about them um yeah like is your coffee shop that you go to was it one that only five people are allowed to be in at a time they know they've said it like we'll move past this in a minute but i mean it's my it is like most of my day yeah yeah they they they they just sell from the door oh i go to the door and then everyone's very it's very confusing when you get there there's always like five not always sometimes sometimes two people hanging around and you don't know where the lot if there's a line so there's always a lot of like are you have you okay now i just wait are you are you okay so you go yeah and then you just order from the person at the at the thing and they they stay distant it's all very it's a very distant

experience yeah um and that's uh yeah and that's really like and then we could we make all our food and don't so i've been making efforts this is coming from somebody who like i used to eat out at least once a day yeah same here like i really miss a restaurant i miss a and w there i said i miss a and w a lot that's fair and like and i've we're at we're trying to eat out more like trying to get more food because it's turned into the opposite right oh yeah we've that's we've started opening up um and i just have to remember what does a and w stand for it's it kills me that i don't remember what this is oh dig deep back and you know dig into your memory uh alligators and wombats no no that's not it close Animation and wrestling. Yeah.

Something in waffles. It's a waffle place, right? Oh, I remember what it is. It's hamburgers at Whoopier. That's funny. Yeah, we try. We try to make sure that they get a little bit, they get a piece every time the name comes up. Hamburgers at Who comes up. Yeah, they get a piece. Amble goes a whoopie.

Yeah, so your day is mostly at home. It's mostly at home. I've been doing a kid show out of the apartment, which has been fun. Yes, it's great. Oh, you watched it. You watched it. I did. I watched it.

Yeah, that's right. That's been a lot of fun. Called Camp Bonkers. I do the Fun Time Friday show. You do it live? Is it a live thing? No, it's recorded and then edited and then released kind of as like a little premiere on Fridays. What is this?

I have kids. Yeah. Well, check it out. Oh, okay. right who what is this i have kids yeah uh well check it out um okay it's uh it's called uh it's uh it's very it's brand new it's a brand new uh youtube channel called camp bonkers where everyone is like you know the the watchers of the show are little campers and you're like at a little camp and i do the friday show which is it was just broadcast out of the av club and i have guests i play all the guest characters and i uh throw to videos and just keep the keep the fun going do little games i do like one game yeah you did like one where you were

drawing like different pieces of an animal now that's scribbles that's a different it's the same channel but it's a i do uh and i also play a character called scribbles the cat and scribbles is a uh uh he draws conglomerate animals out of like a random animal generator he presses a little he's a little cat and he presses a button and like the head of an animal will pop up and he'll draw that maybe do a little fact about the animal and keep drawing the rest of the animal that's right and you're him and i'm i'm the voice and the drawer but it's an animated cat so when you watch it it's just like a little cat face that's like i'm scribbles sounds like that yeah it's uh you know i wish the camp bonkers was a place i could actually go well you can do the next best thing graham and

watch it every day i guess uh but that's been a real that's been that's been great for my uh sanity and my just my my fun levels um it's kept kept me really busy nice um i write all the episodes with them and just just and then my poor wife like i'll we have a very small apartment so i set up this giant studio in our only room in our studio apartment and she sequesters in the kitchen while that happens or leaves it's that's why they call it a studio apartment because people are making shows in it apparently Apparently. So that's my days. And then I'm writing, Ryan Beal and I, and now Maddie Kelly, who's been on the show, are writing our once was live show, getting the business, or creating it.

We're making it into a podcast. That's great. So we're spending our time doing that. And that was a live show that we did that was a live tv like it was a sitcom that was a staged sitcom that we did and then the second half we would be yeah the fan show of the show so high concept very very difficult to explain there's no elevator long enough that i could explain like what it was on an elevator ride and then sir they'd be way out the door but i haven't gotten to the second half of what our show dumb show is uh there was it's always a challenge to explain and i won't get into explaining it too deeply now because it'll just take too long

um but that's fun like you got you got projects on the go you got things just to kind of like keep yeah and i did it immediately like as soon as this happened i got microphones because i knew i was going to be home and i was like well i'm gonna just do this because i knew i have the type of personality that i could also just like be like well i mean I'd get squirrely, but I could like figure out a way to not do anything. Yes. There's a lot of, yeah.

Yeah. What is the age that this could have happened to you where you would have done nothing? You mean like just for the rest of my life? Well, no, like if this had been a, if this had hit when I was,

you know, 21, I'm probably wouldn't have done it yeah well that's a good age yeah i agree there i've i used to tour all the time and yeah i'm just like very lucky slash it's just weird and just timing wise that i i've stopped tour i don't know what i would have done oh yeah like because that are my years were were set up and just where I would be and what I'd be doing. That would all be gone. I don't,

I would think I would be in a complete panic. Yeah. Holy cow. But in terms of like, just not, yeah. 21. Like,

what do you think you would have done just to occupy the time? Like nothing productive, but would it be video games? Yeah. I was just a time where I was like, I would play more video games yeah i was just a time where i was like i would play more video games during the day like and just like drink beer during the day like i was just way more apt to do that like i like at university i would like my friends and i would

like play hooky which was totally legal like you're allowed to skip class at university so it's like you're paying for it. Doesn't everybody just skip class? That was the big draw of university was that they don't care, man. They don't tell their parents. I was the wrong person to go to. Like, as soon as I got to university, I was like, oh, I can just not go. And it got me in so much trouble. Like.

Yeah. I lost a scholarship. Really? Yeah. Because my grades went too bad. Was your scholarship academic or athletic? Why did you laugh at athletic? I didn't.

No one saw it. It's an audio show. No one saw me laugh. It was a academic scholarship that I lost. I'm not proud of it. I know I was laughing about it, but it was very, very stupid of me. I didn't lose it right away. I had a couple of years with it not proud of it. I know I was laughing about it, but it was very, very stupid of me. I didn't lose it right away. I had a couple of years with it and then lost it.

Because I don't like, I feel like there's a thing, like when you graduate high school, you have to either go right to school or if you take your, you're just never going to go back to school if you take a year or two off. That's exactly the logic that I was placed with was if you take a year off you'll never go back i was like that is correct and i was like i am with you on that opinion and so wasn't an option i i was the same like i agreed with that and i probably wouldn't have but i knowing what i know now which is a little bit more than I knew then, I should have taken two years off and done something else and maybe never gone back. Had a gap year, yeah? Yeah. Travel round.

Travel round a bit. This is the character I do on the kids show. His name is Arlo. Hello. Yeah, I remember a kid that I went to the first year of college with and he got a big fat student loan and he ended up buying the biggest tv that the store had and and a video game system he basically wiped out his student loan in a day oh my god see that was like when a tv was like had to still have girth to it was when tvs were furniture yeah

like there was a time where like they were used as like a piece of like you had a plant on it and i when i was in college i had a um a 13 inch the little tiny tv it's still like deep but the and it had a vhs in the bottom yes one unit yeah and that was fine for video games like you i didn't need anything bigger than that no that's true the video games of the time weren't so fantastic that you had to see it i wasn't immersed in the world of of whatever was out back then i can't remember I only ever played hockey games. Nice. NHL, NHL 95.

Yeah. I mean, it was a little later than when I was in college. Thank you very much. Well, yeah. Well, yeah. I was still in high school and I graduated in 95. There, I said it. Class of 95.

I said it. Yeah. Mark was born in 1977. There's some math. There's good math. Oh, yeah. I did get an academic scholarship. I lost mine. There's some math. Good math. Oh, yeah. I did get an academic scholarship. I lost mine.

It's around here somewhere. Too much skipping? Too much playing hooky? Somewhere. Too much drinking cheap vodka. What university were you at there, Mark? The University of New Mexico in Albuquerque new mexico go cocopelles lobos go lobos go love the wolves i was watching the you know the big popular uh

bulls documentary yes and uh luke longley as well luke longley who never had a you didn't i was i wanted him to be interviewed so bad because he was our hometown hero. I mean, he is Australian, but he went to... He was on the Lobos. He was on the New Mexico basketball team. And then when he went to the Bulls, we were just like, Oh, we got a guy on the thing. He's like, this guy is going to meet Michael Jordan. Yeah, he's going to meet Michael.

And he never... They didn't interview him. And you never hear him speak in the whole documentary. I was i was i was a big fan there was a canadian on the balls bill wennington and uh in chicago uh like during the 90s a lot of bulls had their own burgers like they had i don't know if a lot did what wait what you mean at a restaurant or they brought their own burgers to practice no no no like on the menu there were okay i when i was looking into this i just saw a couple other ones i think but he bill winnington from i think montreal uh was on the balls and he there

mcdonald's in chicago had the beef winnington wow i wonder what luke longley's burger would have been did you finish the documentary graham no i how many more episodes came out since the last time we talked about it two two yeah so i still have the two to catch up on okay but i do love that the consensus is that michael jordan's eyes are super bloodshot i didn. I didn't really think about it, but the more memes I saw with a picture of Michael Jordan with crazy red eyes, I was like, oh yeah, I guess he was having irritation in his eyes. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure what's going on. Did you finish it, Mark? I did, yeah. I'm all... My favorite moment from the last two episodes is... Well, Gary, here's Graham. No, Graham, you'll love this. No, I'm going to love it.

Michael Jordan is on the bus, and he's super happy, and he's listening to music, and he's got sunglasses on. He's dancing around on the bus. And they ask him, hey, Michael Jordan, what are you listening to? And he says, it's like 1997 or whatever. And he's like, I'm listening to the new kenny latimore it's not out yet but you know kenny's a friend and yes and i had to be like i had to google what who's kenny latimore what does his music sound

like is like i went to spotify are any of his songs from 1998 in his top 10 most popular? No. He, uh, he was a made up character for, you know, step-by-step the kids, the kids to go to the concert.

Go to the Kenny Lattimore concert. We got caught bootlegging the Kenny Lattimore concert. Oh God. That scene was very good. It's like, it was just so of it, like the way he was holding the disc man, like you used to have to like a, like dish of hot food yeah you know you couldn't

there's something so uncool about it just holding a discman upright like i gotta take it out of the bus it actually reminded me of there was a like an episode of mtv My Super Sweet 16. Oh, yeah. And this, boy, I think it was this girl turning 16 in Detroit. And I believe her catchphrase was, that's juicy. Paris Hilton has that taught. I say that's juicy. Yeah. And she went to Paris trying to get her dress for her sweet 16 party. And she saw a sign that started with a J in French. And she's like, is that French for juicy?

C'est juicy. But anyway, she was from Detroit and her dad was saying, yeah, we're going to have some local talent at your birthday. And she was like, who's it going to be? Is it it gonna be eminem is eminem gonna play my birthday and her dad was like oh maybe it's definitely gonna be someone from detroit yeah yeah it could be tim allen you know yeah it's gordy how gordy how's gonna rap for you and this like r&b singer named luther lackey comes up he was very kenny latimore yeah yeah kenny latimore i love it i love it wait wait so did you who is kenny who is is Kenny Lattimore? He's just like a.

Just a rap artist? No, like an R&B singer. Oh, he was an R&B singer. Yeah. Missed it. Yeah. Look him up. Look him up.

I will. That's great. It's great. Like, like I, all the things in the documentary are fantastic. Like you say, it's fun to see Michael Jordan say son of a bitch a bitch or you know whatever kind of cuss words he likes to use and also like like there's a there's is there more than one shot of him smoking a cigar you're kidding me sarcastic yeah yeah oh man but that felt like a real 90s thing like people were like rediscovering cigars oh yeah people became aficionados that's right who were the big cigar heads of the 90s uh you

know bill clinton right bill oh yeah big big time schwarzenegger schwarzenegger demi moore i believe uh was photographed with one at one point and uh like alec baldwin i feel like he was in the cigar club now i want to know what your feeling is on cigars both of you did you have a moment with cigars no neither did i like did i try smoking them yeah i mean did you like you i'm gonna get into this uh no i smoked cigars that's how i got into smoking that was my gateway to smoking was smoking cigars what yeah this is amazing as a teenager i was obsessed with old stand-up comedians and they all all of them smoke cigars so i was like i'm gonna i'm gonna take that up and i smoked a brand called white owls which were

the cheapest cigar that you could get five in a box and uh they smelled awful there was no way to camouflage what you had just done like a cigar smokes like a very stanky smoke as it goes oh oh gross what about you you did you like at a wedding or anything yeah i mean i tried them or whatever but yeah i just never and then i was always confused like what you don't inhale it you just like keep like you just taste it and roll it around your tongue like what are you doing yeah what are you doing with the cigar like you're just stinking it up you're just like you just gargle it it's a very kind of a wet edge to it that you yeah do you cut oh no what edge what end do you cut off with the snipper you take dog nail clippers

and you snip off snip off the mouth end or the light end i guess you burn off the light end yeah you cut the i guess it's your mouth yeah the mouth in and i mean but a lot of cigars are like pre-rolled so that you don't have to do that like it's kind of a i guess you could get cigars that you use a cigar cutter for which sounds like some kind of disgusting thing in the butt i know i feel like it's it's very like it's the kind of thing if if you're into cigars you're like well i gotta buy the stuff i want so yeah well i i want to buy the stuff. I want, so. Yeah. Well, I want to have the accessories.

Well, I want to get that cigar cutter. So, I need to start smoking the kind that need to be cut. Yeah. And then you're suddenly, you're just in debt. You're trying to look so cool with your cigars. I don't, I think I like the smell of cigars. I love the smell of pipes. I love the smell of pipes.

Oh, yeah. Pipes are the best. Yeah. Yeah. They do smell great but what's like with the cigar i guess i because i get cigarettes you know you like you have your fix you like you're like okay i'm kind of evened out again i do my little smoke but the cigar it's like you're like an afternoon right yeah it seems to be like so long like what are you like well i

gotta find a leather chair to sit in and i think my dad told me he smoked one cigar once and threw up yes yeah after like that's what everyone would do after someone had a baby like because that was an old thing yeah that's right yeah that the and then like i feel like when i was a kid there bubblegum cigars that they would hand out instead of smoking cigars. I know We Three Kings of Orientar tried to light a rubber cigar. Yes.

It was loaded and exploded. I don't know that one. You do not know that one? I love it. It's not unrelated to Jingle Bell's Batman spells. Which I do know. one it's a it's not it's like not unrelated to jingle bells batman spells yeah which i do know yeah which i same writer wrote gladly uh are you familiar with deck the halls with santa's balls yeah yeah yeah for sure and i never understood it when i was little i get it now it's testicles so cigar smokers all around yeah everybody loves cigar i haven't but i'm

i'm watching that documentary i'm gonna get into it yeah and he would michael jordan i read boy i feel like someone could present some piece of uh michael jordan uh trivia at this moment and i would fall for it immediately but they said it said that he smoked a cigar before every game really that's i guess you have you have to be at the arena super early that's true he went in the last episode he was like they were like how are you how was your afternoon he was like it was great i had a cigar smoked a couple or had a drank a couple beers played the piano. And maybe Scotty Pippin was like,

you have a piano. He's like, yeah, a piano in my room. And I thought he was joking about everything. And then at the end of that episode, he's playing the piano in his room. So I was like, did he drink a couple of beers and have a cigar also before?

Well, you saw him smoking a cigar. That's so crazy that that's like a lifetime of experiences for most people and he managed to squeeze it in in a day yeah uh but like i feel like if you are a professional athlete and you're just constantly burning calories you can have a couple beers oh yeah and it's nothing yeah the um like i remember letterman he like always had a cigar going under the desk and once in a while he would get caught on camera smoking it oh yeah coming back from break that was always very but i was just like do all the guests just have to sit there

and smell cigar smell the whole time is it does a cigar that you just keep lit go for an hour yeah i don't know yeah he also only served warm milk in those mugs to everyone that's what no one knows that no one knows that to be true yeah it was warm condensed milk so it's super sweet it's warm condensed it's very sweet it's a real treat i wonder what the first show was that we're like we're gonna give everyone coffee cups no matter what time of day it is. Yeah. And they're going to be drinking water out of coffee cups with the show's logo on them. It might have been the first time somebody needed to hide like what they were actually drinking.

Yeah. Apparently, way back in the day, Jackie Gleason was never sober for anything that he did. Like he was always drunk, always had a coffee cup full of booze and because it was just a nerves thing he had like he couldn't shake the nerves so he just got right blasted every time and then people were like it's funny when this guy yells at his wife he seems legitimately drunk. And mad. Yeah. Yeah, I don't. It's weird.

To me, it's always weird the moment that somebody pulls out cigars. Because then I feel like, was I supposed to have a cigar? Was I supposed to bring something to the baby shower? I got onesies for everyone. Oh, man. Oh, boy. I've never been to a baby shower. I only know them completely by proxy.

I don't know that a lot of men have. I haven't been to a baby shower. And I'm with child. I've thrown a few. You've thrown a few? just kidding i i don't think i've ever really been either no i think maybe i think maybe i was at one and i was leaving like oh baby shower stop bye gotta go see you later baby so do you think that what goes on at a baby shower is a lot of like smack talk a lot of trash talking yeah you're talking the baby yeah yeah this baby's gonna be so dumb your baby's gonna be a little bitch everybody goes around in a circle and makes fun of the baby yeah yeah right now you're like

yeah i eat through a cord yeah into my stomach and through a cord because i have no teeth better get used to that amniotic fluid honey how soft is that soft spot on your head oh boy roasting a baby roasting a baby just sounds delicious yeah oh boy they're just falling off the bone they hardly have had time to get on the bone yeah oh that's why everybody loves baby back ribs you know so it's a veal human veal alley mcveil um dave what's going on with you, man? Well, a lot's going on with me. So busy. So easy to keep busy. Do you remember a couple weeks ago I was talking about this yogurt bar,

this frozen yogurt bar at my school? Yes. I thought you meant the bar that you went and got yogurt. I got you. It's like an oxygen bar where they inject yogurt up your nose. Yeah. I get yogurt enemas from the kellogg family can you imagine like this is gross going in and coming out there's no good point for this

um i uh so i was at the grocery store the other day and they've closed down the bulk section where you can get like nuts and beans. Yeah. Nuts and bolts for your hands. Is that look for the right nuts you want like this? Yeah. You got to flip through some, some nuts.

I lost my ring in the nuts. And they had, and sometimes they'll have candy in there and i saw a candy in there i hadn't thought of for so long they and they so everything that was in the bulk section they've just now pre-packaged in little plastic uh clamshells and it's like you know you know whatever a little thing of nuts a little little thing of bolts, as you said. But they have different candies just like packaged. And there was this huge tub of these candies.

And I don't know if you can remember these, but I've never seen them anywhere other than a 25 cent machine that you crank. Oh, yeah. other than a 25 cent machine that you crank. Oh yeah. And they're little like pucks, little discs that are pink and purple and orange. And they're, they're chewy and they're maybe not even candy.

They're maybe just a sour gum. Yeah. It's a sour gum. And I know exactly what you're talking about. Are they sprees? No, no, they're like these little exactly like i think they were maybe even just called chews yes they were called chews yeah yeah i remember chews

and then yeah they had them at canadian tire out of the vending machine and i would as soon as i went to canadian tire with my dad it was just countdown to choose when do i get when do i get to get to choose and i don't know that anyone liked them, but I guess you did. It was just out of, I liked any candy. You like getting something. But was it, did you swallow them or were they gum? No, they were gum. They were gum, yeah.

It was like a weird, like you say, it was sour. And they looked like they were made out of tiny bits of other candy stuck together. Yeah, like pressed into a shape they were speckled in in like in some terrible like uh speckly you know countertop yeah like it did look like something just carved out of a countertop anyway you can buy big tubs of them at the grocery store now i love knowing this oh i remember the yeah that is what yeah okay great oh do you have a uh internet going while you're doing this yeah just doing a little yeah a little recon it's different than the regular podcast it's true yeah graham and i were on jordan jesse go the podcast this week uh and uh we recorded that They don't do a video component to the recording.

So I'm on my computer the whole time. How are you not? I can't do any of these Zoom shows that people are doing. I can't because I can't watch. Because everything that I want is right there. Like, oh, just click one icon. That's everything i like yeah comedy clubs have a captive audience and they have like

big muscly guys saying don't look to your phone yeah exactly um man i'm so you can't watch them or you can't perform them i can't kind of either like if if it wasn't because you're not like how do you guys when you're doing it you can hear the people laughing or you can't hear the people laughing oh there's i mean we can hear each other laugh we'd like yeah they were they pre-record we purpose an hour before right no no we do it we stream it oh they service yeah i thought you were pre-taping it like Just like a couple hours early No we do it

We do it live Am I wrong that you ever pre-taped it? You're not wrong we pre-taped the one That we could when we were still Allowed to be together as a group We did one Filmed at the Fox Cabaret where there was no audience

And we just had it We had Peter on camera We filmed it he went home and uploaded it filmed at the fox cabaret where we were there's no audience and we just had it we had peter on camera we filmed it he went home and uploaded it and it was like four hours later okay but now we since we're all just at home we just press go and we're there nice so the audience can interact like they can be like do a thing with this and then we'll do just ignore them uh but it's it's so disconcerting and weird because that we can hear each other laugh we like we let our microphones stay live when even when we cut our video and we're not in the scene or whatever right and so that's a little bit helpful because we'll

hear like a little bit of like but yeah there's no audience laughter at all aside from that and then like anything in chat is like the 10 people out of the couple hundred that are watching like they get that's how the room is wow they're like this is funny like okay we're doing great this is not funny everyone hates it everyone hates it everyone person hates it they really balance the scales here it does feel that way sometimes so like and because i'm not that experienced with performing on the internet, like in any kind of streamy way. And like, it just feels so powerful.

The, the comments just have so much weight and it can be a little bit disconcerting. So I try not to pay too much attention to it. Just understand that there's like lots of, and then I also don't take any offense at all when people just kind of like go in for five minutes and leave or watch it for half of it and go away. When I'm on Instagram and there's like the, at the very top of your Instagram, they'll have stories and then they, and they'll show whatever's live.

It will be like the priority thing. And then I'll always click on that and be like, why did I click on this? I don't want to, I don't want to see anything. One of ours once, right. And I were doing,

yeah. And then as soon as ryan saw me he like he shut the show down that's we were leaving anyway and then you came up and he was like oh dave's here we gotta go it was very funny um so so i've been eating chews that's amazing so i can't believe that you found them like it's well it's not like i was looking for them no i know but that's when that means that you truly deserve to find them. If you weren't looking, but I was like,

why, why, why do these exist outside of a 25 cent? Like, why? Like whatever those thuggy toys I could buy next to them. Yeah. The little crazy hand.

It wouldn't glue. Yeah. The cat hair hand. Yes. Yes. The cat hair covered in cat hair in two minutes guaranteed cat hair hand i don't even have a cat yeah cat hair hand find that cat hair um but after weeks and weeks of trying to find yeast we got yeast and abby had cooked a couple. Yes. Loaves abound. Yes. And Abby had cooked a couple loaves of bread. And then I was like, oh, you know what I used to make? I haven't made bread in a long time.

But I remember my grandma used to make these cinnamon buns. And it was like a family recipe. And then she got quite old. And over time, it didn't happen overnight. then she got quite old and and and over time it didn't happen overnight and i was i remember like loving these cinnamon buns when i was a kid and then i grew up and i was like oh i could make i could cook these myself but my grandma was kind of too old by then and i remember i was staying with my aunt in uh for a week and i asked her like oh do, do you know I'd like to learn grandma's cinnamon bun recipe and she was like, oh yeah, you just take any white bread loaf

white bread recipe and you roll it flat and you just put butter, cinnamon and sugar in it. Oh, wow. The entire thing and roll it up and cut it into rolls. Amazing. I love it. I did that a couple times back then and i was like well now that we're baking things i'll do it again i'll make some some cinnamon buns nice so i did and it i have such a hard time not killing yeast like you you you get all your ingredients ready and then you make your yeast and it's supposed to rise and it just doesn't and i'm like well i killed it again yeah yeah

like you expose it to direct sunlight yeah and then i just so i pour it down the sink and then it's like actually i am alive and i'm living in your your pipes so you were unsuccessful or successful with the cinnamon well you know what they they for the like i've never seen it before but they've just started selling yeast in giant bags now oh right like they used to just have the little envelopes but now they're like people want yeast we'll give them whatever yeast they want yeah the uh i didn't realize when i was uh because i like to make my own uh pizza dough oh the uh i didn't realize when i was uh because i like to make my own uh pizza dough oh yeah but i didn't realize you weren't supposed to use like a packet per dough so i was always just pouring a full packet of yeast in there and then being like

why is this dough so crazy why didn't leave the apartment so i uh eventually i on my third yeast i got it going nice and i made the like made the bread uh let it rise smushed it down let it rise again smushed it down and filled it uh covered it in uh the the ingredients the butter and brown sugar and cinnamon and rolled it up and made the things and cooked it it rised up wonderfully so when you're cooking sorry just that i know like you roll it and then you're cooking it like a log and then you'll cut it you you you roll it you then you cut it i see and you arrange those cuts into the pan right each one is a different bun yeah of cinnamon yeah and then i i like to make them really like sugary and uh and buttery inside yeah i don't because i don't put uh i don't like the glaze on top i think that's too much yeah so i just like a bun a dry bun that's super sweet

i uh this as soon as you were talking about cinnamon buns i just had a real flashback to eating at cinnabon in a mall and like always feeling like two bites in like this is too much yeah this is and uh so i made these and they cooked up great and i started eating them and the yeast was like still going and like just expanding in my stomach for days and days oh my god um did the kids have them uh yeah they had a couple they thought they were great was it a big yeah they were like the kids have not ever been adventurous eaters and uh like it's amazing when they'll just say yes to a new food even if it's like like inarguably a delicious food that is just white flour and sugar yeah like here here chew on these chews no i guess i guess so can we go to canadian tire though

oh man did you jazz up the cinnamon buns with like nuts no raisins no this is like every time i cook as a grown-up i'm i'm fighting back against my parents desire to put currents and everything yeah yeah that was just an effort to clean out the pantry though like yeah well what do we have what do we have in here no we used to have this i guess we still do there's this christmas bread that we have every year that is like basically a just like a loaf of white bread filled with currants and nuts and like sugar and cinnamon and people love it but if you were if you were cutting into a bread and you saw that in there you'd be like ah the bread's gone off something something weird's happened to this bread bejeweled bread this is really good bread if you don't mind picking everything out of your teeth for the

rest of christmas oh man uh that bologna that had pimentos in it i've heard of such a bologna there was also i don't know if this is a canadian thing mark you'll be able to comment on this there was a loaf that had macaroni and cheese in it a loaf of bologna or bread bologna but it had macaroni and cheese infused in it do you guys know what i'm talking about or is this what kind of like jelly and peanut butter in the same jar concoction was that yeah this is bologna macaroni the san San Francisco treat. So it had like the skin of the bologna. Like it was like a bologna. It was a bologna.

It came in packages like how bologna would be packaged. But there was like, it was infused with macaroni and cheese. That is insane. And would the bologna be sliced? Yeah. Or would you have to slice it yourself? No, it was slices of bologna. But these noodles and cheese like existed

through many slices macaroni and cheese yeah yeah yeah that is so crazy it might have just been a calgary yeah because i don't i don't know that this is a thing but i don't know if i ever had bologna yeah you never had bologna like i maybe have like i've had like whatever generic luncheon meat but i don't know what i was i never asked what i was eating yeah that's true probably as an adult i've never bought bologna because it's synonymous with uh you know nonsense yeah that's true being phony yeah yeah i had all sorts of terrible cold cuts growing up yeah like, you don't, don't spend a lot of money on cold cuts for kids. They're not going to appreciate Capicola,

you know? Oh yeah. This bologna, the macaroni and cheese is off in this bologna. It's a little pedestrian. Wouldn't you say father go get me the pimento loaf. I'm still, I still can't do the math of the bologna it's like you're explaining time we can all we can all google it at the same time are we all gonna google macaroni bologna are we spelling bologna bologna oh yeah macaroni bologna no it's suggesting bologna oh do you see it that's the yeah that's

the sound of somebody who's seen it kogels kogels macaroni and cheese loaf god that looks so gross it's a loaf it's a loaf when i was when it was auto it's a wonderful when i was on my google search was auto correcting i when i said baloney ma it was like baloney machine oh baloney machine yes right this way sir the baloney machine yeah oh boy anyways oh baloney marionette oh that's not it uh yeah so like that i remember being on the like in the same section with the other cold cuts but it was stood out as being like unnatural oh god just so bad and then they're yeah and on this same google search i'm seeing the ones with the olives in it baloney was like, it became like a other food delivery food.

It's like you're just reading a terrible BuzzFeed article. 15 bolognas, you won't believe. 15 bolognas you wish you had back. Number 10. Apparently it's quite a thing in different parts of canada that fried bologna is the like i consider kind of a delicacy have you had spam i've had spam yeah i've had spam and the click which was like the chicken oh it's. Yeah. Click. Click. Um, yeah.

K L I C K maybe. Okay. Click. But that's like click. Yeah. Oh, I, I,

like I just in the past couple of weeks that was watching some show and, uh, there was a dare for somebody to eat dog food. And I was like, oh yeah, my friends and I did that. We dared each other to eat dog food somebody to eat dog food. And I was like, Oh yeah, my friends and I did that. We dared each other to eat dog food and we ate dog food. And it's not that far from spam.

Macaroni bologna. Yeah. And it's not that fam has like, it's like the consistency is terrible. I don't think I've had it. Oh yeah. I love it in Hawaii where they made the movie Aloha. I think it's going to be like,

we were just talking with a friend of like, you think it's going to be like firm and like, kind of like have some umami or something. But it's like, it's just like, it's just, it's just like a saucy, terrible food that should last forever. Hot take. Mark doesn't like spam. He doesn't like spam. No, I don't. But the food, I love emails. You love emails?

Bring them on. I'm lonely. At a party in high school, I remember somebody showed up with a chicken in a can. And we opened that up and it was wild. I don't know what that is. It's a whole chicken crammed in it. Yeah, it's cooked. And it's crammed in a can

like a can like what you would find a bean like a can of beans but like a big can can of wolf ass that's amazing is it like a can that you peel the top off like uh you get the the can opener you go around you open it up and then it just slides out because it's in some sort of grease is it like you eat it is it cooked that's the word yeah it's cooked like you could eat it right then or as my friend did uh threw it around in the backyard yeah teens man i'm googling that and yep you're right um so yeah made cinnamon buns nice and the other thing that happened this week is uh well when graham and i recorded jordan jessico abby put both the kids to bed and so last night i put

i put both the kids to bed and uh part of bedtime when i uh put put an individual kid to bed is i will wrestle with them but when i put both the kids to bed i was like do you both want to wrestle me at the same time and they were like yes yeah and so we did that and uh one thing i like to do is i take the kid uh and i will say i'm gonna oh i'm gonna body slam you so hard but i throw them up in the air so they can land on their feet. Right. And so I'm like, oh, you're going to land on your face. But then they managed, like the way I throw them, they can get their feet down.

And they're like, ha-ha, I landed on my feet. And then usually I just grab them by the back of the head and push them into the bed. Like throw them into the pillows. And I did that last night with Margo. And then i kept wrestling poppy and margo just walked away and i was like oh well i don't know maybe you're done yeah and then she she went into our bathroom and uh uh a minute later she's like dad my nose is bleeding oh no and so i went and i was like oh yeah you're right but she doesn't know what to do and like she's fine and but she's just standing over the toilet

not touching it yeah but just like letting it drip into the toilet that's actually it's not a bad very yeah it's very smart and but it's also dripping everywhere and like on the walls and kind of looked like a horror movie oh man and so the first thing i did was like okay get some some toilet paper put it on your nose squeeze it yeah and you squeeze it while i google gi joe nosebleed yeah because i remember my like one of my first nosebleeds that the old nurse at the school was like hold it back and then tip your head back so that the blood just ran down your throat it was the worst advice ever not we're supposed to do that's what i thought you were supposed to do but according to the gi joe the more you know

clip that i watched last night yeah you lean forward ah that always seems so weird to me because it would just make it worse but what is it is the squeezing doing everything for you like the squeezing is stopping it yeah i think the squeezing is stopping it yeah so oh man that's what's the was it in an excitement nosebleed or had she like hit her face nose oh she'd hit her face like enough time wow uh into some pillows i look i was wrestling two kids it was i was chaos and she she was not in any pain she was like well i gotta go i gotta go bleed over here yeah dealt with her nose yeah exactly that's very cool that's uh as they would say in wrestling keeping kayfabe you know like you're you're you're still you're committed to the bit a hundred percent oh she's a real ham and agar yeah yeah i love that the uh so and so

did you you pinched her nose and and then leaned forward yeah she she pinched her own nose but we still did the leaning back thing because i was like i'm smarter than gi joe yeah you are that's true a lot has probably changed since the 80s although in the gi joe video there's a bunch of kids playing football and one gets a nosebleed and a kid says uh pinch it and lean backwards and then whichever gi joe you know a roadblock or yeah and full superhero gi joe outfit i'm watching the kids play football yeah i'm here no that's not what you want to do now you lean forward 1987 yeah kids he comes in with like just like shaming the kid for trying to help yeah get out of here i got this i got this nose bleed

emergency this kid's not a real doctor there was one of those that i saw that was uh two kids playing in the water and then lightning happened and they yeah the guy comes up out of the he's like a submarine gi joe and he like comes up he's like get out of the water and like that that's like i've never heard that before like don't go swimming with lightning because oh that was all like, that was for sure. You're not supposed to, cause the lightning could shoot, could hit the pool. Oh yeah. I remember I was at a, I had, we, I was once at a water park and we had to leave cause there was lightning.

Really? Yeah. Yeah. It was, you were never like, and in New Mexico there's in, in the summer, there's a monsoon season. So it rains like clockwork like at 5 PM. And so there's always in the summer there's a monsoon season so it rains like clockwork ever like at 5 p.m so there's always a thunderstorm and so you're just like well no more pool for the next 30 minutes because it would pass pretty quickly but yeah it was very it was very uh common knowledge i just loved in that gi joe video that that that guy was there the whole time He was watching them swim. From below.

Get out. Get out before the cops get here. You get out. Then he just goes back in. And the writers rooms of G.I. Joe must have been pretty frustrating because they were like, no, we don't have 22 minutes for this episode. We need a minute after the show for a G.I. Joe

to give the kid a lesson yeah oh man that's uh yeah that's a real part of my childhood right there yeah no it really is uh anyway she's recovering good good um but you know good good honor she you know got a bloody it's very advanced in the wrestling thing to to be able to figure out how to well yeah and then she was cutting her her head with a razor razors um what's uh going on with you um well i uh a couple weeks ago i got a new tv and oh yeah because the other one broke and so it became like an emergency expedition like we need a new tv now graham used his student loan for yeah i used yeah i used the student loan i got and i also got a nintendo 64 is that the old okay yeah that would have been the era yeah you got golden i got golden eye um but uh it just

coincidentally as i got a new TV, there was a cable. A bunch of cable channels became free for the month. And so I was like, this is great. This couldn't have worked out better. And there's the Food Network. That's very easy to watch seven hours worth of television and not realize what time has gone by because they're all the same show. But TLC, formerly the learning channel now of a train wreck of a station uh-huh has years ago i watched this show called 90 day fiance

yeah yeah you stopped no i stopped because i don't have the channel and uh i just kind of fell out of the the groove of it um past guest alicia tobin had cable so i'll go watch it at her place it's uh that's one thing i noticed every sunday night it's always trending on twitter so this is the thing back in the day it was just it was one show it was and i've never watched a second of it mark no i don't even know what it's about so it's about it's uh an american person who has met somebody from another country. And if you come into America to marry somebody, you have 90 days to get married to that person. So you're just on a visa for those 90 days.

And if the marriage doesn't happen, you have to go back to whatever country you came from. back to whatever country you came from so as you might expect there's a lot of uh there's a lot of dumpy dudes that have found somebody in a poverty stricken country who's trying to maybe make a better life uh and but there's also some people where the you know the person's from england and the person from america there's there's no disparity there um and those are the ones that kind of end up lasting you know like people that are of some kind of similar background but uh it's a very it's like it's deliciously trashy and it used to be just one show and in the intervening time since i've seen this show it has now spawned 10 shows there's 10 shows that are 90 day fiancee connected or related oh my god so it's so are they amazing there's some of them are about specific couples

there's one that's a spin-off called the family chantelle uh and like a popular fiancee yeah she was one of the popular fiances um but there's a 90 day fiance now what that follows the people after they got married on the 91st day after 90 days yeah and then now what there's a show where past people past stars of 90 day fiance watch the current season of 90 day fiance and comment on it so that's called uh pillow talk 90 day fiance pillow talk and and there's a before the 90 days where you're seeing the couple and they're deciding whether or not they want to get married and then there's 90 days the other way where the american goes to the other country and hangs out there and tries to get their citizenship in that country anyways and then there's a there's one about all the 90 day fiancee

characters being self-quarantined so that's its own show oh wow yeah but i counted them up by watching the ads and i was like they think there's fully 10 shows that are all around this one it It's the only thing the network has. They have that and, like, my 600-pound life or whatever. Those are the two. There's no room for any other programming, it sounds like. That's amazing. Yeah, that's true.

Like, they've filled up their whole docket with this one show. I mean, and I watch it, and I love it. Yeah. Oh, I remember being in in um well when i was visiting abby's family in switzerland they had british cable yes and it would there would be a channel not even like you know a show the entire channel was just auditions like people auditioning for big brother oh my god wow That would have been the best. Just hilarious.

Because it was just people like, hey, I've. I guess so. I never checked it out. I'm so out of touch with TV. I can't believe there's 10 shows all about one show. Yeah. One very, and not a great premise. Like a fine premise. it's fine for one reality show but you love i loved it when you loved it and i love it now and uh you know whoever's

watching the season of it this is a spoiler alert so jog ahead a minute but uh there's this one guy who has been chatting with his girlfriend for seven years. She lives in Ukraine. He tried to meet up with her on eight different occasions, and she stood him up every time. And he flew to Ukraine. Yeah, he flew to, and he was going to meet her here, and he was going to meet her there. And then when he landed there for this meeting, she said, I can't meet you right now. My nephew has a hockey

game. So, and everybody in this guy's life said, like, she's a scammer. She's not real. She doesn't exist. And on the last episode I watched, she showed up. She actually showed up to meet him i'm sure to the

90 day fiance people were like we'll give you 10 grand yeah yeah yeah if you show up to this thing what uh is so it is every episode about a couple no every episode's around a fishing episode yeah yeah it's all everybody has a segment on every show okay but in a sea the season like the whole season is 90 days or whatever yeah yeah yeah like yeah it happens inside that 90 days okay and uh yeah but it's just like it it's done so well as reality shows uh rarely are where you where you do actually they've picked out who's the villain and who's you know why it's going to work and why it's not going to work and and they actually like plant like surprises in there and uh it's it's trashy and i'm going to be sad when that free trial ends because i will not pay for it uh i remember one time i i was just seeing like a clip of this fiance in her fiance's car.

And he was like, don't roll down the window. Or he was like, she was sitting in the passenger seat. Yeah. And he was like, don't push that button. And she just kept pushing the button because she doesn't care, I guess. I think that was Aunt Fiza. And she was from Russia. Oh, my.

Yeah. Oh, my God. She just doesn't like to be told. No. That's right. And I think her. And who does? Her fiance was named Jorge.

And he just got out of prison recently. So, welcome back, Jorge. Yeah. I'll go for them. I have to watch this show. I'm going to watch it. Now, you were a 90-day fiance. That's right.

No. No. I was not. have to watch this show i'm gonna watch it now you were a 90-day fiance that's right no no that was not well you you married someone from a different country same thing the same thing out of a mail order bride catalog no but yeah i did marry somebody who's from a different country that's why i'm in canada we love having you here. Yeah, we love, yeah, we're blessed. Oh, he's so nice. Now, before we move on to overheards, there's one last bit of business to take care of. Oh, yes.

This is the final week of the Bradley Cooper Movie Club. And do you want to hear a theme song? I would love to hear a theme song. Oh, guys, I'm sorry. This isn't the Bradley Cooper, Movie Club theme song. This is the new Kenny Lattimore. I mean, this is... No one's heard this yet.

This is... This is mine. Oh, I got to apologize. Okay. All right. Here is a Bradley Cooper Movie Club theme song. Okay. Bradley Cooper Movie Club.

Movie Club. Movie Club. Bradley Cooper Movie Club. Well, if you're okay, why not? Beautiful. That is a Bradley Cooper Movie Club Movie Club Bradley Cooper Movie Club Okay, why not? That is a Bradley Cooper Movie Club remix by Frederick F. Thank you. If you have any Bradley Cooper Movie Club remixes you want to send,

yeah, keep sending them. Because here's the thing. Even though this is the last installment, I found out that there's a Bradley Cooper movie called Murder Meat Train or something like that. And so I need need to watch so i'll watch it and i'll fill you in next week what yeah we can like replace the bradley cooper movie club with something billy crystal movie club then we get to keep those uh bbcmcs but we didn't make any graphics it doesn't really do serve any purpose we can talk about those initials yeah we did like there's no hashtag going or anything like we don't need to worry about bcmc

you gotta keep bcmc up like i think we can have a discussion at some point about who would be a good replacement or what kind of like what kind of movie would be a good what kind of movie or you know maybe not even movie maybe we'll just watch skateboard videos. One thing that I think would be great and just like the kind of movie is like Teen Horny Rumps. Oh, T-H-R-S. Teen Horny Rumps. The thing about this movie club is, any movie club is, can we get our guests to watch it? Because last week, our guests did not watch it.

I feel bad sometimes getting the guests to watch it. Sometimes the guest is like, I would love some homework. Yes. I really wanted to. I just, I watched some of it. This week, our guests watched some of it. Last week, our guests watched none of it. Next week, I guarantee our guests won't of it last week our guests watched none of it yeah next week i guarantee

our guests won't watch it no but this this i will uh i will say i i plan to and i will watch murder meat train or whatever it's called and i will have a review for you okay and then that'll be that'll be your thing and then after that we can come up with yes yeah after next week's guest who we love very much but will not i guarantee will not watch this movie uh so we watched this movie we watched aloha um which is a cameron crow uh vehicle written and directed um hot cast one of the hottest casts of any movie around i I mean, in what regard? Just like great, great, a lot of really good actors in it. Well, Bradley Cooper's in it.

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, Valentine's Day had the hottest cast. That's true. Hot-wise? Yeah, hot-wise. Hot factor? Yeah, just like this movie has Bradley Cooper, has Emma Stone, it has, what's her name, Rachel McAdams? Rachel McAdams.

It has John krasinski bill murray bill murray for some reason it's got alec baldwin briefly uh and danny mcbride yeah danny mcbride's in it i saw i saw all the i saw all of those characters except for alec baldwin is bill murray does he play like is he in it the whole time like does he have like many scenes like did he have like 20 days on this five or six scenes yeah i feel like it's the kind of thing where bill murray is a hard get yeah right but we're shooting a movie in hawaii i feel like that's something people will yeah that's right like they'll say yes to it for a little bit less money because they get to go hang out in hawaii has bill murray been in any of their cameron crowe films cameron crowe is

the director and writer of this who makes who hasn't made very many movies he made almost famous was that him he made almost famous jerry mcguire jerry mcguire oh shit he made singles yeah he made singles cameron you made say anything you had me at hello that's amazing that's that's amazing that's crazy like somebody wrote and all uh he made vanilla sky me vanilla sky shut down time square i mean that would be easier now but yeah down time square to have what uh vanilla sky is he he wrote the line when you drink someone's gum you're making a promise. Or whatever.

Charity says when she crashes that car. What if you got that in a fortune cookie? Like, what does yours say? Oh, I don't wanna. What if you got that in one of those cards that makes a noise?

Like, usually a harry potter card and it goes oh i passed a spell on me but it's a vanilla sky card with karen diaz when you open it up it's like when you drink someone's gum your body's making a promise. Oh, man. So, like, if you've never heard what the basic plot of Aloha is, is Bradley Cooper is like a disgraced former military guy. Yeah, he's a former military guy who's back doing a Hawaiian thing with the military. It's sort of unclear at the beginning and he uh he has to go and talk to um the tribes people that are on a piece of land that they need for a rocket launch yeah maybe and uh bill murray plays like a billionaire he's like an elon musk yeah and uh he's like an elon musk yeah and uh emma stone's like a real like by the by the numbers uh military military lady yeah who is one quarter hawaiian and half chinese one quarter one quarter chinese and half swedish yeah she has x in it no they meet for the first time. Okay. Yeah. And then Rachel McAdams is his ex.

That's his ex, right. And she was his ex in Wedding Crashers. Oh, yeah. They dated in Wedding Crashers. So they were putting back together the classic team. And so they were a couple in Wedding Crashers. And then 10 years go by. And now in this new movie, he becomes a couple with emma

stone who is 10 years younger than uh rachel mcadams so it is a real like matthew mcconaughey and dazed and confused kind of thing where like the women say the same age i get older this i keep getting older yeah so any like i mean it's not good this movie no no no but it's not like it's not bad like all those shots are in focus and they clearly they bought they rented the right gear yeah yeah they got the right gear they lit it well so everybody, you could see everything. So now Rachel McAdams and John Krasinski are a couple, and he doesn't talk.

He doesn't talk. The whole thing is he won't say any words. Yeah, and it's a different point. Bradley Cooper's reading his body language, but then there's a point in the movie where actual subtitles come up. From the body language, and they're like subtitles that are saying way more than the body language is saying and it's like a comedy skit yeah it is like a comedy skit i feel like there's an element that where cameron crowe wrote that for something

else and slid it into this movie i feel like a lot of cameron crowe movies are supposed to be comedies and they're just like light dramas yeah because there wasn't a joke in the whole thing or like a successful joke i guess but like and like bill murray like that character could have been anybody i just didn't need to recruit bill murray for such a fantastic you know performer you you call his 800 number that's right and if he answers you you get him yeah that's right if he happens to be in the mood to answer his own crazy phone situation yeah um did this movie do terrible or did it yes right because i had a lot of blowback because they were like why would you cast emma stone as a

one-quarter hawaiian one-quarter chinese uh person when she's clearly not any of those things yeah not even close yeah and it's the kind of thing where you could have cast someone who was those ethnicities or at least one of them yeah uh or you could just make the character not that yeah exactly it comes up twice it comes up twice she mentions it a whole lot she mentions her ethnicity but she like there's people who are just like into the hawaiian myths in the movie and she's one of them she could just be into the myth yeah i mean it would be but like you know that's that's one route to take you're just higher you know yeah i'm with you and uh it's weird like i don't know i always feel like it's a failure of filmmaking where

you're like who am i supposed to like in this movie? I don't hate any of them, but I'm like not rooting for anybody. And I don't even know what the quest is. Like, why did you keep watching it? Oh, it's a home where we were assigned it.

Yeah. We were doing homework and you just, you did half your homework and you just showed up and copied off of us exactly what i did uh yeah i was like what it's a romantic comedy but for some reason there's like a b plot or which is also the a plot of there's space weapons they're trying to shut down bill murray uh making some kind of space weapon arsenal yeah so and then if uh the the big reveal so spoiler if you do if you want to know how the fire you know figure it out for yourself uh but bill murray they they at first think that uh bradley cooper is crazy for

busting up the satellite they're like you're going to you're going to military jail and then they find out oh no he was right there actually were like yeah he's never like in trouble at all like they say you're gonna be you're gonna be in trouble but then he's like well i'm gonna go hang out with rachel mcadams for a while and the next time he goes to the base they're like oh no you were right and bill murray's been arrested yeah by interpol i forgot that that's exactly what he did after he was like well i'm a big trouble off off to my own to my ex-girlfriend's house um and bill murray is a billionaire who gets arrested for this which would never happen never happened not in a million years um so what what was the thesis do you think of this like was it like is it a film about

the dangers of being rich no the thing that like at the root of it it was a just a romantic comedy and then they tried to pile on a thing of like you know uh this thing about the tribesmen and all this kind of stuff and then they tripled down and it was about nuclear war so it just really like i don't know man like what point were you trying to make yeah yeah um the uh there's one scene where john krasinski is wearing his jumpsuit and it's just going right up his butt jumpsuits can do that man yeah I mean he's a military guy

and he's tall it's hard to get a right fit and you know the other thing is like there was a credits scene like the credits rolled and then there was a scene after like uh like how the superhero little easter egg scene at the end right stay stay for the credit yeah and uh it was bad too it didn't really it wasn't like anything that anyone in the theater would be like no no no i want no. I want to see what happens in this Aloha universe.

They're going to reveal what, what was that again? It was him planting a tree with the, the King of the Hawaiian tribe. And you were like, well, I don't remember that ever being an issue. Like you'll never plant a tree with me.

We don't have enough trees. We'll never get enough trees. We're one tree short. Yeah. I also found it strange that they seem to just listen to a lot of Hawaiian music. Yes. Which I don't know if that's something non-Hawaiians do all the time when they live in Hawaii. You have to.

It's part of the culture. You can't just listen to Sheryl Crow like the rest of us. You can watch uh i want to soak up the sun because that's kind of about hawaii yeah um and my other note i had is mcadams rachel mcadams her name is most of macadamia which is a hawaiian nut that's why she was cast that's a you're that's a real conspirator like you're finding some real code there that's like beautiful mind stuff yes yes oh yeah i'm really like there i have a room with twine yeah red twine connecting things yeah so aloha if you before oh sorry just a couple of trivia things yeah from imdb there was this it was one of the um in when in 2014 when there were sony emails leaked oh yeah there were a bunch of emails

criticizing this movie that were like why are we making this movie we'll never i'm never making a movie like this again we Just based on stars. Like, the story is terrible. Yeah. Oh, that's really funny that it was part of the email leaks. Because those were delicious. The other trivia was, Ben Stiller and Reese Witherspoon were both attached to Star,

but left due to scheduling conflicts. Cameron Crowe then spent four years rewriting the script making the characters younger four years to make them younger oh boy oh well okay so he was uh he was like 48 oh boy now i gotta make him 40 yeah how am i gonna do this all the lingo's gonna change yeah yeah yeah he's not gonna know what tiktok is well it's all that dialogue ron you're 48 you shouldn't have come in here you've been 48 i'm sorry i'm 48 yeah just a classic 48 um but you know what uh bradley cooper shines and yes you know especially his blue blue eyes yes um yes he's like a lost coyote is what she

called him i can't remember yeah uh lost kite like what she emma stone is describing him on the phone to her friend and bradley cooper is listening on a listening device yeah immediately yeah he was hoping to get something horny i guess yeah underpinning of that and she is like describing him in the most like the the way that was the most incriminating we'll get her in the most trouble yeah yeah and but she's calling a brilliant and all this stuff i don't know like even didn't do a scene where somebody was sassing somebody off correctly couldn't even do that he's a brilliant like just a commanding wonderful wreck yes yes um uh so rogue this uh in the bradley cooper movie club the top most is um still a star is born yeah and the bottom most is still all about steve all about steve that's

right this i would put right below burnt or above burnt i put it below burnt i put it below burnt too and above steve yeah and above steve yeah was there another one in there valentine's day val oh above valentine's day yeah i'm learning about so many uh bradley cooper films that's the funny thing is like i didn't realize i thought he was in like three movies and he's been in dozens and dozens of films i mean he hasn't stopped but yeah wow so avoid steve yeah avoid steve but avoid all about steve yeah yeah but uh you know what check out a star is born not bad all right i will definitely will and this has been bradley cooper movie club the the final bradley cooper movie club of the century that's right of the century and i but don't worry dear listeners um i will watch murder me train yeah i won't

and next week you listeners you have no homework this week no so no i will be i'll be responding to it and uh live because i have too much respect for our guests that's right but not for march yeah who's this guy like what's going on why did i get uh prince philip uh he's been had some bad headlines lately, but we think. Prince Philip, the 100-year-old guy? Oh, what a coup. Yeah. Yeah, this is the only podcast he'll do.

Doesn't know what it is. Well, he did Rogan. Yeah. Prince Philip on Rogan. What are you doing? The sensory deprivation tax. What is this? You ever smoke a blunt? Do we want to move on to one of our herds?

Yes, indeed. Hi, I'm James, host of Minority Corner, which is a podcast that's all about intersectionality. It's hosted by James with a guest host every week discussing all sorts of wonderful issues, nerdy and political, pop culture, black, queer, feminism, race, sexuality, news. You're going to learn your history, their self-empowerment, and it's told by what feels like your best friend. Why should someone listen to Minority Corner? Why not?

Oh my God, free stuff. There's not free stuff. The listeners of Minority Corner will enjoy some necessary LOLs, but mainly a look at what's happening in our world through a colorful lens. People will get the perspective of marginalized communities.

I feel heard, I feel seen. Like you said, you need to understand how to be more proactive in your community, and this is a great way to get started. Join us every Friday on MaxFun fun or wherever you get your podcast. Minority Corner. Because together we're the majority. Overheard.

Overheard's a segment where even in these tough times of, you know, social distancing and self-isolation, you maybe are still lucky enough to hear something juicy and don't keep it to yourself share it out to the world here to this podcast and we always like to start with the guest mark would you lead the charge for i will thanks graham and dave yeah uh so during uh during this uh pandemic um people's schedules are a little bit different gyms are closed yes uh so there's a guy that lives in our building that has started working out

right in front of our window which i'm fine with whatever like he's like it's not bothering me there's a lot of that it and very nice what is working out he takes giant weights like huge weights and he's and he's and he jump ropes so like i always i always know he's there but like oh yeah yeah very distinct and uh no i just mean broadly what is working out oh it's like it's like when you feel like you need to like move your body yeah yeah to feel like you're alive don't know don't know uh so so that's not the over there recently he was uh he was i heard him go um hey get get away from that stop it stop it get away what are you doing what are you doing oh oh and then like uh somebody came out and he was like, oh, and then he went into this very detailed description.

He's like, I was doing deadlifts. I remember he said I was doing deadlifts and the squirrel started attacking me. So he was, he was being like harassed by a squirrel, but he was so, I think he kind of knew that because we're in a busy part of the little neighborhood. I think he kind of knew that like people would hear him he wasn't performing it right but he was like kind of having to be a little bit dramatic about the whole thing because he was frightened but he was also wanting people to know that it was okay i'm very strong i'm strong yeah doing deadlifts no uh so he was attacked he was attacked by squirrel and it kept going like they kept it kept going for the rest of his workout. I've always worried or thought about people who do Shakespeare in the park that some animals just kind of like show up

on stage and then they just have to incorporate it into the show. Yeah. Oh, well, yeah. I mean, we were out when Anita, my wife, was directing out in the caravan caravan which is a farm theater there was a dog that i named whisper smoke because he was great he like he just appeared it would just like run through the and he would interrupt every show and he was like a neighbor farms i love it and like everyone would just be like visitor strange force upon us off you go yeah um dave do you have an overt i guess so um so uh during all of this the uh the fact that there's no like live performances anywhere

has really put a strain on the postering uh no community yeah like the posts where they have like designated posts to put posters up for your show or concerts that are coming to town uh they're all empty they're all empty yeah they're all empty except uh the other day i saw one that just said, bored? Try a marshmallow crossbow. Safe, accurate, fun, handmade in Canada. Oh, man. This is the time. This is the time to get the message out there. And I've bought so many that just weren't accurate.

Yeah, that's right. And this is the time that you want to be shooting food at each other. Yeah. There's still a stick, presumably i picture like a marshmallow instead of the arrowhead right uh i'm picturing it just being a thing that you launch marshmallow yeah i'm picturing like just a marshmallow a slingshot style yeah oh wait we'll see wouldn't that be a marshmallow slingshot but it's got a trigger yes like it's on a i pull back and then that's fun boy i don't know if i if this will come across

not really yeah no i can see it yeah board try marshmallow crossbow that lifted up a bit phone i want to see the second half and yeah try marshmallow crossbow and it's got a picture on it that's what exactly what it is couldn't be anything else very fun i mean it's a great poster like the the fact that there aren't that there just aren't posters up, it's no fault to the poster makers. It's just that there's no event. There's no events. Yeah.

And I found there was something that, I think it was Vancouver is Awesome, has a drawing of the sign language interpreter that accompanied the medical kind of chief. Sign language interpreter that accompanied the medical kind of chief. And, you know, it's him holding his length like two meters apart. And that's been on a lot of the poster polls, just that image. That's true. Yeah, there is.

My overheard comes courtesy of sitting in a dog park. And there was a woman calling to her dog who had kind of squirmed away they threw the ball for him and then he got the ball and was like this is my chance and started kind of getting away and the woman was calling him and I thought she was named

the dog was named Keys because that's what it sounded like from where I was sitting and I was like Keys that's a really weird name for a dog and then she said it a bit louder and it was keith was the name of the dog that's worse keith keith keith alicia keith keith keith the dog keys is a cute name for a dog keys is a good name and you know what keith is just very like it's funny it must be named after somebody that they knew oh that's a really hard one like for a dog to understand that you're saying his name yeah is he saying is he saying my name or

is he offering me quiche that's the big confusion um which is such a man's name just like oh boy i love a good quiche so that was something as a kid that uh like if my mom ever made quiche i was like you yeah sam here i know i was really hoping you were gonna go the other way with like i was just like oh mom thank you eight-year-old me loves a quiche um for my birthday i think i'd like a quiche yeah well for i want to because my birthday is on december 1st but we're having the party on the 5th so could i get two quiches i feel like quiche was because it was all egg right it was just like a big egg festival egg and cheese egg it's like a pie made out of egg right with an egg pie maybe cheese i remember thinking like that and uh egg fu young that you would get from a chinese uh restaurant we're in the same family

where it was like why are we adding eggs to a thing that we know is good but then now you're putting in too many eggs and you're ruining it for everybody but now i love a quiche yeah yeah i could go for quiche right now i've ordered quiche at restaurants yeah i'll take the quiche yeah thank you uh you'll take the quiche she says excuse me are you saying my name she gives me my keys back my name is quiche i'll be your waiter oh boy oh no my name's egg foo young i'll be your waiter uh now we also have overheard sent in from people all over the map if you want to send one in you can send it into spy at maximum fun.org and uh this overhears went from way back in the 90s in a wendy's in keen new hampshire uh it was so long ago that i was in line for the wendy's taco and dessert buffet bar

wow i remember that um so it's uh when i heard this discussion between an elderly woman and her grown daughter saying, no, mother, that's not it. You don't have it right. That's not what the movie is called. Can we please just talk about something else? And the mom loudly replied, I am certain that I'm right. It's Pennsylvania and it stars Tom Cruise and he's got VD and he's on a diet. Tom Cruise, and he's got VD, and he's on a diet. He's on a diet.

Everything was wrong. Everything was offensively wrong. Everything was so wrong. Well, Pennsylvania. Pennsylvania is inoffensive. Yeah, but it's also just the wrong. offensively everything was so wrong well pennsylvania pennsylvania is an event yeah but it's also just the wrong like the title of the movie didn't sink it at all it was just on the streets of pennsylvania i've come down with vd oh my god that's very good oh but why are you losing weight because of the vd no i'm on a diet i'm on a diet on a diet i'm a character that's very good oh but are you losing weight because of the vd no i'm on a diet i'm on a diet on a diet i'm a character that's losing weight in the movie at least sometimes you lose it

before oh boy oh i love it i love it that's my favorite word it's funnier that or it it's like it kind of just sits and gets better yeah that's right the more it marinates the better it gets yeah it just oh it's so good so skinny um this one it's also good but it may not hold a candle to the tom cruise one but um uh this is an overheard it's old because it's referring to a thing that doesn't really exist anymore gara rufa fish pedicure pedicure places yeah put your why don't they exist anymore they're gross maybe because they're disgusting thing are they well you stick your feet in a fish tank and and the fish just go ham on your little piggies yeah Yeah. So much pork metaphor. And this is, by the way,

this is Bob in Newcastle, UK. So this is UK. Oh, Newcastle. Uh-oh. Is this Arlo? Oh, no. Anyway, we're on the high street, which at the time often had people holding signs

advertising nearby fish pedicure spa treatments. We overheard a seven or eight year old boy saying to his mother, hey mom, you can get fish to chew your feet off, and it's only ten pounds. Chew them off. That's very cute.

Take my feet away. Hey mom, it's only ten quid. That's all it is, mom. feet away and lastly this is doug from indy so i'm assuming indiana uh while getting groceries indianapolis probably yeah indianapolis totally man that's from indiana it's the capital yeah it's america's crossroads is it is? Is it? Is that where Four Corners joined or something? Or what is it? It's America's crossword puzzle. Oh, yes.

Sorry. It's America's cross hot buns. Cross hot buns. Yeah. I know. I retrofitted it. It's fine. It's fine.

It's a good song. So Doug from Indy was getting groceries at Target. I overheard two teen girls ask an elderly store employee excuse us but where's your dream catcher section that's so good uh that might they they might have just pointed to the tree yeah oh yeah aisle seven a lot of people loitering over there hanging out just trying to pick up the right dream catcher for them. And don't just use them and then leave the store. You have to buy them.

That's right. If you try one on. Just catch your dreams here. Yeah. A lot of people are trying to sneak in a quick nap in the store. In the change room. You come in, you read our magazine to use our dream catcher. These things are useless after you use them. We can't resell them when they're filled with your dreams this filled with dreams

yeah they were called people want these dream condoms at a time but the catcher seemed more sellable although they called condoms dream catcher that's true all in the same family of products yeah 3m uh in addition to overhears that are written and we also accept your phone calls if you want to call us the phone number is this one 1-844-779-7631 that's one spy pod one like these people have. Baby. Hey, Dave Graham and appropriately socially distanced guests. We're calling in with an overheard. I'm laying here in Oklahoma Central time. It's 1130 at night and my wife just rolled over in her sleep, looked me dead in the face and said, I wish I could

learn to love Cheez-Its. And then went totally back to sleep. So I have no context, and I don't know how to take this in the morning when I have to tell her that I called this in. So anyway, love the show. You got it. Yeah, the thing is that you should serve her cheese that's in bed in the morning

come in with that little breakfast tray put it in our lap didn't hear me i said i don't know how i'm going to love these yeah get those away i don't know are they're like a very they're a cracker they're a cracker cheez-its are great actually this is confounding to me because like you you are born loving cheez-its it's like how do you not always eat them it's uh maybe she meant jesus oh that's true she woke up out of a dead sleep yeah yeah a good alternative are goldfish i eat a lot of goldfish yeah goldfish are dry so dry i love goldfish i'm a big ritz man big ritz yeah baby i mean you're kind of hearing out of the cheese based crackers that's true but i used to really like those swiss cheese ones that are man. Big Ritz. Yeah, baby. I mean, you're kind of veering out of the cheese based crackers.

That's true. I used to really like those Swiss cheese ones that are just like covered in, covered in the like powder. Yes. Yeah. It's been a real food show. She parked her car outside my house and takes her clothes off. Says she's close to understanding cheeseez-Its in her dreams.

She has trouble acting normal when she's nervous! Your kids wake up. Around here. Hey guys, it's Josh from Oklahoma calling in with a quarantine overheard. I'm working in my shared office with my wife

and everything is quiet and all of a sudden Two Oklahomans. Two cracker-related overheards from Oklahoma From Oklahoma What's going on? Wow That's gotta be a first How many listeners do you have in Oklahoma? I love that you have two We just have two

Yeah, two But they're big Timothy McVeigh And Brian Big Country Reeves Come on Very close to my home state Yes It's where the wind goes sweeping down the plains everyone knows

it right uh so what happened in that one she was someone had an uncle cracker song stuck in their head yeah and was mad at it yeah was he an offshoot of kid rock is that where he was an was he uh was he kid rock's dj yes that's exactly right he was kid rock's dj what are his songs there's the follow me everything is all right that's uncle cracker that's uncle cracker yeah but that was that a cover of an old timey song yeah it does it sounds like something the four tops would have recorded or, oh, maybe this was a cover. Give me the beat, boys, and free my soul. Want to get lost in that rock and roll and drift away.

Yeah. No, he's got the goods. He's got the goods. Yeah. I'm going to have to listen to some Uncle Cracker after this and eat some crackers. Yeah. I got the, I mean, I got the new Uncle Cracker album. It's not out yet, but

he's a friend. He's a friend, yeah. And an uncle. Hello, Dave and Graham and possible wonderful mystery guest. This is Julie from Bowling Green, Ohio.

I just remembered this. I just woke up, sorry. Yesterday at work, I work at a grocery store, and lately I've been outside cleaning carts because I let people in and counting them as they go in, obviously. And this one woman, I let her know we had a couple of clean carts just inside.

And she holds up her reusable bag. She says, all right, if I use it, I just came in for some kombucha. And my brain stopped for a minute before I let her in. And we said it was fine. But then I had to stop. Kombucha. Kombucha.

Been buying some kombucha. Yeah. I'm buying some kombucha. You guys heard the latest kombucha album? Oh, kombucha. Kenny Kombucha. That's right. Well, that brings us to the end of this here podcast uh mark you each and every sunday people

can watch the sunday service online yeah that's right so just uh we still have i don't think we have a vanity youtube address yet so you just go to youtube and look for the sunday service not there's going to be a few church services, things, but, uh, it shouldn't be too hard to find Sunday service comedy. Um, we stream right at nine o'clock. Uh,

actually we stream like around nine Oh five Vancouver time Pacific time. But, we leave the video up all week. Uh, and as Graham mentioned at the beginning, Paul F. Tompkins has been, uh,

has been guesting with us every week. It's been so much fun. Yeah. Uh, and we're getting better at it and it's been great. Tompkins has been guesting with us every week. It's been so much fun. Yeah. And we're getting better at it, and it's been great, and the response has been really nice. So yeah, come catch it. Well, best show in town, man, I'll tell you that. Dave has... And these days, it's the

only show in town. That's right, yeah. Dave has pulled out a guitar, so I think we're going to be treated to a nice extra. I just need something to do with my hands. They're the devil's plaything. You don't have them. It has nothing to do with nothing.

You going to play something? No. Oh, really? I thought it was all plugged in already. No, it hasn't been plugged in in years. You're like, isn't it like Conan O'Brien walk around rehearsal? Oh, yeah, sure. I play guitar all the time. I'm like the Conan O'Brien of this podcast.

That's true. And which make me the Andy Richter. Made in the shade. Yeah. Yeah, perfect. Well, that brings us all the way to the end of the podcast. Do we have any business? We don't have any business. We were on Jordanordan jesse go you can listen to that it i mean we didn't time

promoting it were very well no that's true we were on it two weeks ago yeah and it was fun and if you haven't heard it go give it a listen uh and if you like this show please tell your friends and come on back next week for another episode of stop podcasting yourself maximum fun.org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported