Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 718 - Emmett Hall

Episode Date: December 21, 2021

Comedian Emmett Hall (and his piano) join us to talk Harry Potter, traveling to the USA, and car batteries. Plus, our annual Secret Santa gift exchange.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka and he's Graham Clark and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 718 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is man who's on the nog train, Mr. Dave Shumka. It's gotta be nog time, it's gotta be nog time, everybody here time, everybody nog time. Get out your nutmeg and shave it across your can of eggnog and drink it in a can it's a can of eggnog carbonated a can of eggnog can you imagine a carbonated eggnog in a can and just like sprays everywhere and like they open you know people shake it up and when you win the big race

that's right you're spraying it all over your opponent and then when the close-up shot where it's usually a bead of water going down it's just a long drip of nog uh our guest today the cool thing about nog is if you if you do spit it out you can suck it back yeah it's much like um a loogie or like a loogie of old and it is christmas this is our christmas episode our our holiday episode. You heard the jingle bells on the intro. That's our big kind of Christmassy thing that we do. Yeah.

And the big jolly man with the beard is going to be sliding down that chimney. You're talking about yourself? Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to steal those eggs that pantyhose come in. That's what I want. That's what I collect. What is that?

What is that about? I'm like a hybrid between the Easter bunny and Santa. I, but you steal, I steal. Yeah. So also the Grinch, I'm a hybrid of the three main characters.

Um, our guest today, returning guests to the podcast. One of our fave all time guests. Uh, he is hilarious comedian, Emmett Hall. one of our fave all-time guests uh he is hilarious comedian emmett hall that was the figgy pudding verse yeah which is my favorite universe ho ho ho i seem to always be christmas timing yeah yeah that's why i thought it was like we got to make sure that we

get uh emmet in for before the end of the calendar year because then we uh we we lose our emmet benefits and we have yeah we definitely have to declare him on our taxes emmet hall what a treat of joy you've been our uh you were i don't know if you've been on like one of these uh you know just standard guest uh christmas episodes but back when we used to have like people come on for segments and like we would have people come sing a song or read a poem or do whatever christmas uh bit they had i had poems i had pageants i I had Christmas carols. Yeah, you were the Knights of the Night with Ken Lawson, you were something with Chris

Gauthier, Sack of Corn. You were, and then you had yourself reading that Kringlemas poem. That's right. Yeah. You got it. You got the goods. And now. Well, in this time, I've got I've got Oh, sad. I like how it went out at the end This time, I've got...

Yeah, I'm a close beacher. I like how it went out at the end like it's a sitcom. Stinger. Screech! To go back to your... When you said a can of eggnog, I thought... I didn't think like a carbonated can. I thought like old-timey with like a sardine oh yeah yeah that's what feels like something from the 30s you'd get like in your rations pack yeah and there's a picture of a chicken on it or something like that yeah well you know they call it in French? L'Aide-A-Poule. Yeah. Chicken milk.

Yeah, which is a good way of putting it, right? Yeah, I mean, it's not wrong. Should we get to know us? Sure. Get to know us. Oh, there's those jingle bells again. Up on the rooftop reindeer paws. Did I get it right?

Something, something Santa Claus. Something, something Santa Claus. Emmett, it's been a whole calendar year, maybe even a little more. It's been, I'll tell you how long it's been. Two years. Because Emmett was, when we first thought we would have to start doing Zoom podcasts, Emmett was the first person i thought of and i sent him a message saying hey you have probably have like microphones like you probably have a good recording setup i was worried that uh you know we just get stuck with a bunch of people with uh you know laptop microphones yeah and then i said oh yeah you should definitely come on soon

and then i checked and he had been on like three weeks earlier yeah it was it was december of 2019 i'm pretty sure okay i want to say it was january of 2020 that's what i want to say okay say that pick it up um emmett what have you been up to what have you been up to tell us a story geez two years i haven't told a joke in two years i haven't done any comedy are you completely out of doing live comedy? Yeah, you're right. It was December. You got it. You got it.

Well, actually, I shouldn't say that because last week I went and did a hero show. That was my first time on stage performing. For like that, for two years? Basically. No, it was February 2020 was the last time i got on stage for that show do you miss it i mean no no i didn't i didn't miss it as much as i thought i guess i just preoccupied with a million other things and it wasn't it wasn't my um it was

kind of a thing i did on the side rather than a prominent vocation. But you would go. Prominent vocation is my favorite Aerosmith album. But you would do like very elaborate things where other people like you'd have music and you'd come in costume and you'd have a character. That was an interesting thing last week when I did the hero show. Uh, it was the first time. Well,

Grant, I guess I played piano for the Sunday service a couple of times, but to actually get on stage and perform and do a bit. Yeah. And this was the first time since turning, like doing this last time I did the comedy, I was in my thirties and now I'm in my forties. Gross.

That was, that kind of hit me being like i cannot this cannot go poorly to be to be in my 40s and having and bombing in a stupid outfit that i probably paid money for like that's feels great right you get to spend your own money on what you want sounds good you're no longer reduced to stealing outfits yeah you can buy your own outfit i can buy my own outfit i mean there's a i'm part of a union now yeah yeah um do you get discounts on jackets and stuff if you are in the union i guess union jackets ones that have horses on them and whatever yeah it just says comedy on the back comedy's got a great union.

Yeah. Everybody doesn't know this, but yeah, comedy in general has a great union, uh, stand up and improv in particular. Great. Strong unions.

Um, uh, you know, we walked a picket line, uh, the improvisers, uh, pretended they were driving in cars around the picket line.

No one could read their signs cause they were all mimed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You did a character years ago at Laugh Gallery where you were a mime. Do you remember that? Yeah. It was a one joke bit that just, it was worth the hassle of going all the way out to whatever location, putting on the makeup.

Painting your face. Coming out. Oh, no. to whatever location, putting on the makeup, painting your face, coming out. Oh no, having a nice elaborate intro about how I went to Belgium for three weeks. I was like, I did a clowning workshop with a special mime. And here's my first like debut performance and coming out. And within 10 seconds I go,

hi. And then I have to walk off. And then that was the end of the night. Yeah. That was me. Yeah. So, I mean, I don't, off. And that was the whole bit. Yeah, that was me. Yeah, so, I mean, I don't really miss the commitment level that some of that stuff takes, I don't think. Fair enough.

Well, what have you been doing all this while? You're not telling jokes on stage. You're not performing in weird costumes. Yeah, how's your pando been? How's the what? Oh, gosh. It was, yeah, I i mean i work for a video game company now um um and so it was from one computer in one room to a computer in another room that happened to be at my house so i i lucked out you know at a video game company it's supported

by tons of brilliant it brains so right getting all that you know servers and and cross platform things that being said i i work with another uh musician and i think the first six months was of a lot of okay does this can you hear this and you can okay so you get the latency on um no wait go back go back there's a lot of that's the first six months of this podcast yeah that was even before we were on zoom the amount of problems we had as a company i was thinking like this is a this is a computer company and we're all running into this nightmare of trying to figure out how to talk in zoom meetings and things and i can't imagine what it's like for for joe schmo yeah yeah imagine if you were doing

like the opposite of a computer company like rocks yeah rocks or churning butter or something yeah they would be there they would have no clue what they're talking about on a zoom meeting yeah they would be like this could have been an email sure the microphone's too close to the to the churn um do you think that uh people were i assume people weren't allowed to visit prisons so was that via zoom or what how did that work it wouldn't be a laptop just passed around and would there would there yeah maybe there would they do someone would hoop a laptop is that what it's called hoopingoping? Hooping, yeah. Or keistering. Oh, yeah. No, they make one.

Yeah, they make one. That's right. They make a toilet laptop. Out of potatoes. You know, you get a battery out of potatoes. Yeah, you find some electronics in the yard just kicking around. I really don't want to go to prison. Why?

What have you heard? I saw this movie that looked very scary elvis was dancing around and there was the warden threw a party i watched that just this past weekend i watched that movie and there's the funny thing that i never noticed before is um there's a scene where elvis is like he's breaking rocks he's on the he's in the prison yard breaking rocks and he's just a skinny guy he didn't have like he's not a like with his shirt off he's just like a skinny little boy which i never i don't know i picture that elvis was probably chiseled right until he got like crazy yeah so he was shirtless cracking the rocks yeah yeah oh wonder he also was in like Hawaii movies and stuff.

Yeah, I feel like I've seen him surfing. Yeah, definitely. He's been to Hawaii. He played a cliff diver in a movie. He's played like a race car driver and a hotel. We're going to win this race. But like, you know, like all the stuff with colonel tom and elvis right yeah they were uh they really butted heads over whether he was gonna be chiseled or skinny

and they do they went with skinny which is uh probably the easier choice of the two whoa what would have given colonel tom that he colonel tom took 50 commission from uh from elvis and also when elvis wanted to make films that weren't him playing an elvis-like guy uh colonel tom forbade it so well that's probably fine i'm so this is his manager i've now deduced yes yeah okay he's uh i don't think he's a real colonel either i think he's like colonel in the way colonel sanders is a colonel yeah he's a popcorn colonel yeah that's funny the popcorn colonel popcorn chicken colonel chicken wait never mind his name's not colonel oh no i've infected you with my shit jokes weird wordplay jokes. He's not Colonel Chicken.

That'd be a good way to rip off KFC. He's Colonel Chicken. He's not a guy. Woof woof, I'm Colonel Chicken. What? He barks. See? No copyright. With every box of Colonel Chicken, you get some chicken milk. A can of

carbonated chicken milk. got all over my laptop my prison laptop you gotta bring and we've done all the callbacks in like four minutes that's great they did it all but yeah um what's the what would you say is the best prison movie that you've seen there's a lot it's his own genre for sure yeah um there's one with damian lewis and he's got a crazy walk in it like he he he plays a real harsh like gangster like he he he runs the prison from the inside as a prisoner right but he does this weird um like perked up butt walk like i that's what i vaguely remember i think and i'll think brian cox is in it oh yeah um what what is it called do you remember is it the escapist yeah that's it escapist what year from 2008 there you go right yeah um dave favorite prison movie the first one that came to mind for me was that uh when they made death race oh yeah jason statham and everybody

had to had to death race themselves out of prison yeah i watched that i watched that over the pandemic yeah it's uh it's that the actor who um i think he's australian who's in it uh who like recently played a kennedy in a movie and he was in the um planet of the apes movies mark walberg no anyway there's a type of i kept on there's he's this actor and he um he's got what i call um it's almost like a syndrome it's like a a mask of his face on his face you're gonna have to look like he's got a prosthetic it looks like he's got a prosthetic print out of his face put on his face because it's so big and thick are you thinking of jason clark from zero dark 30 yeah that's the guy and same with the guy who played um uh spacey's minion in house of cards that guy oh that guy yeah yeah yeah yeah i could see him being a a real prison guy

real i'm saying uh i'm getting a weird track i'm saying that's another actor who's got a face of his face on his face good amit when when something goes over our head like this just feel free to fill it with some piano yeah there we go oh ten bomb yeah um for the listener amit is at his work studio where they have he's got a keyboard plugged in so that this is nice because in the past two and a half months I got to move back into the studio and are you doing music mostly for them or yeah that's awesome that's my main gig now for for the most part for clay entertainment so I'm doing all the music for for the christmas video game yeah christmas video game halloween video game yeah i do have a story about uh elvis presley's prison movie though i remember being or i remember asking my parents to rent it for me because

someone told me that he drops an f-bomb in the song and i was like well i gotta see this so i just why i sat through the whole movie to get through the one lyric where I thought he would say, I sure wish she was fucking me. And he didn't say that. Did he come close? I don't even remember what the lyric actually was. This is the movie Jailhouse Rock. Jailhouse Rock, yeah.

How old were you when you rented it? Probably about nine. Okay. And it was a big deal back then to see a swear word. Yeah. Holy, yeah. That was like catnip, you know? Elvis was still so big in the 80s and even 90s.

Yeah. He's still. Just due to leftover like kitsch factor and impersonators. Yeah. Well, I think in the 80 80s everyone still loved the 50s yeah that's true there was still yeah there was always still like the elvis has left the building carry over that he's still alive and there was that stamp the famous stamp debate yeah stamp wars where they wanted a chiseled elvis or a plump elvis

skinny shirtless elvis yeah skinny shirtless elvis emaciated elvis yeah yeah but like there's one stamp where he doesn't have nipples there was leaving las vegas with the flying elvis yeah that was huge that was huge yeah the elvis camp um uh baba hotep that was another one yeah sure no i didn't like i never liked elvis no uh i found him appealing in my youth i thought he was uh elvis was a hero to some but he didn't mean much to me forget the lyric um yeah i don't know i've seen a bunch of his movies and they're all the same there's a i actually know this girl she's a good girl and she's crazy about elvin she loves horses and her boyfriend too nice i was thinking it would be really fun you know those targeted uh like um algorithm

uh t-shirts that are like this guy was born in february and ra ra owns a tow truck and he loves roger federer don't mess with that guy i think it would be good a good piece of tom petty merch that was yes this is uh this shirt belongs to a good girl who's loves her mama and loves jesus in america too and crazy about elvis what brought us into this whole thing my shirt would say this guy wishes elvis dropped an f-bomb and jailhouse rock yeah the algorithms are getting very specific do you remember the first time that you were like cognizant of a swear word like that you realized the power behind a swear word i remember thinking holy shit was great in back to the future yes yeah. Yeah. That was a good one. Yeah. Dave, first swear word that you

can recall? I feel like in National Lampoon's vacation, he's like driving through a rough neighborhood and he rolls down his window and asks for directions or something and someone yells fuck your mama or something and i remember like everyone laughed i didn't get it because i was like six and i just ran to the next room and told my parents hey guess what happened the movie uh pretty great you i don't know when the first time that uh that i heard one but i know that i like in first grade i learned that the finger was uh was a lot of power yeah yeah from

my childhood chum dave cartwright he uh he showed me how to use the finger right. And I've been using it ever since. I also remember the movie Back to the Beach. Oh, yeah. With Frankie and Annette and Pee Wee Herman. That's why another movie I rented just to watch one moment in a movie. What was the moment you were hoping for? Pee Wee Herman. Yeah.

Yeah. He was also in the Cheech and Chong movie. Did you ever watch a Cheech and Chong movie for Pee Wee Herman? No, I was watching in the cheech and chong movie did you ever watch a cheech and chong movie for pw herman no i was watching it for cheech and chong at that point yes excellent herman showed up that was just an extra stroke of luck uh and i uh i remember afterwards telling my parents yeah it was really good they only. There was only one swear word in the movie, and it was bitchin'. So it was a surfer word rather than a swear word. Yeah, and it's like, you know, you get around that way because it's what you call a dog. That was always contentious.

Somehow I knew, like, you know, F-bombs and shit words were bad, but there was a couple that, that, uh, that escaped me. And because I think we heard it through much, so much through TV. Like I remember we were, I was going for a walk with my parents when I was really young. I might've been five or six and they got ahead of me. I yelled out to them, wait up,

you bastards. And they just asked, they demanded where I learned that. Why can't say bastard bastard seems like i thought it was just i thought it was like like you doyos i thought it was the equivalent of something like that yeah you yo-yos um yeah i think uh i didn't understand swearing until my parents reacted like with with dave like saying it and then seeing like, ah, yes,

this is, this is a excellent thing to keep to myself. Asshole. We can say in my house. You couldn't say asshole when we were kids. Yeah. Yeah. Of course you couldn't,

but like, we didn't know the, the bigger ones, but asshole seemed like a real, like a real juicy one. Cause it's about a butthole, you know what I mean? I don't think we were allowed to say butthole either.

I feel like there were words that like asshole you couldn't say, but ass you could. Yeah, because it's technical. Because it's a donkey. Bastard is a child born out of wedlock. Yeah, a bitch is a female dog, but a son of a bitch.

I mean... Yeah, you're stretching the... Yeah, who are we talking about here? A son of a bitch i i mean yeah you're stretching the uh yeah who are we talking about here oh son of a bitch is easy is is a little less um harsh isn't it i feel like it's more hard oh really well i don't know just like by association there's a negative bitch is pretty harsh rich is harsh and it's it's absolving the son in that uh in the way that he's acting because he's just a son he's just a regular son and she's the bitch yeah yeah so it was son of that uh in the way that he's acting because he's just a son he's just a regular son and she's the bitch yeah yeah so it was son of a gun in my household and my mom says it to this day son of a gun well son of a gun yeah we were a big uh pain in the neck instead of pain in the ass

pain in the neck yeah um my mom said shit a lot like i I really, shit would lost its shine pretty quick in our house, but that just turned me towards asshole. You know, I've never looked back. You guys like swearing or do you not swear very much? Do you find, cause Dave, you've got to watch your swears now.

Yeah. I, Abby can't help it. She's a woman possessed. I don't need to swear around my kids, but Abby can't help herself. So I'm not worried about me. I'll be fine. Yeah. Do you have a swear jar or something like that? No. She doesn't have any coins.

Just a swipe. Put a tap on the... Yeah, we really do need to do a swear tap. I swear aplenty, but I try and make sure that they have some uh context some some heft one yeah yeah but you know i will use it in place of um to fucking give me the uh fucking curly fries yeah shit for brains um um emmett what else have you been doing? You were working for this video game company. You're playing music.

What else has kept you busy? Started watching Harry Potter's recently. Okay. All right. What do you think? Is this your first time? Yeah. Yeah.

These movies are 20 years old. I haven't seen them. Did you do any books no i read the first chapter of the first book yeah you get it and i was it was a little too um every sentence ended like thank you very much like that kind of it was um harry potter lived lived in a cabinet thank you very much and that kind of thing where it's like it's that kind of weird uh overly overly britted or something yeah yeah yeah um what about the movies i haven't seen i've seen part of one of the movies so i don't every morning he was served worms and he'd

had quite enough of that thank you very much thank you very much uh and yeah the movies are kind of like that it's weird because they're really uh brutal in in his step parents or like i guess his aunt who he lives with like they yeah they lock him in a closet they don't let him get his mail they it's it's all stuff that now 20 years since oh when i was a kid i loved getting mail that would have been horror yeah that's true the one or two pieces of mail you got a year yeah kept like no contact from anyone just completely just there's this constant abuse and that's like that's like one you're still hearing stories about people trapped in cellars and stuff that's horror short stories now

yeah but that's like 20 minutes of the first movie like he never goes back but there's a lot of that he does every the beginning

of every movie I've watched the first really he has to go back for summer vacation yeah for summer it's like well you know he's a magical wizard and who can

oh yeah wizard schools out wait do they hate wizards who can banish wraiths to the nether region but he has to like mow the lawn at his aunt's place for the summer and thank you he hasn't learned a spell for that yet so he actually just has to do it himself yeah do you think that the kids hate learning magic the same way that we hated learning stuff in school i that's another thing is i don't

get the the whole logic of the school and the wizards. Like when you graduate from wizard school and then what do you do? Like as a wizard, what do you do? Are your credits transferable to a community college? Yeah, they, they,

there's not, it's not like you have like, and then you're like a resident wizard at a local town or something. Like there's no, there's no, yeah. If you get a job teaching more wizards that's one thing but i don't know everyone's learning to be a wizard to you can't be a wizard

in muggle world can you can how come why can't you be because you're not allowed to do magic are we in muggle world we're muggles we're muggles so our whole world is muggle world and there's like a tiny sliver of the world that is magic world you have to go through an invisible brick wall to the other yeah yeah yeah but then you but you you're only allowed to you're only allowed to use your magic in that place or you it literally won't work in muggle world no it will work you're not allowed it's forbidden and i don't know it's weird because like good wizards won't do it, but bad wizards, I don't know if they do. I haven't got that far. Um, so I'm quite,

I'm a little embarrassed cause I'm quite lost with, I think the rules, they celebrate every episode, every episode, every movie they celebrate Christmas. Hmm. Yeah. That's weird.

So they have like, there's wizards and magical potions and stuff, but they're like, but still Christ, you know,ards and magical potions and stuff, but they're like, but still Christ, you know, we still got to acknowledge what is Santa Claus is not a wizard. I mean, it's really just about the goodness in all of us and the, you know, the joy in the children's eyes, the way that the old folks smile. Yeah.

But I did come to one revelation though. How many are you in? Three. Three? Okay. And the acting's gotten better, but the first two are just incredible with that level of child acting where it's breathy. Everything requires a breath. And they add extra syllables to their mouth movements. So there's this lower lip has to move a little bit more and every time they walk there's like this is my walking

down the stairs movement and this is what i realized uh because i saw a recent promotion for matrix 4 that kiana reeves did and i was wondering i root for the guy and every time i see him but the reason why his acting's insufferable is because he's never graduated from kid acting keanu reeves keanu has still does the everything is an extra breath no you're doing mr anderson he's nobody well what is the matrix oh he thinks and acts too hard and he doesn't know what to do with his arms that's pretty good you see like you'll see a nine year old in the way he acts you can't come on you can't put that on the internet the internet will come after you that's true yeah i preempted it with I love him and I root for him no matter what. He's our meme-iest actor.

Is he our meme-iest actor? Well, I mean, the lady who played Mimi on Drew Carey. Yeah, she was the meme-iest. Yes, absolutely. But, you know, I feel like Gene Wilder, he's pretty memed. Oh, yeah, sure. That one. That one, but it's huge uh but yeah maybe

you're right like selection wise maybe keanu reeves has has the top shelf you know what i mean um so how many movies are there emmett seven there's seven books i think they made them into eight movies uh and then there's also like the muggle womp desperate boys and where to find them and whatever it's called boys enchanting animals and get off my roof desperate boys and how to pay them desperate boys and where to find them what are those ones called i swear if you put in desperate boys where to find them your computer is going to do a back flip oh no why is there why are there blue and red lights flashing outside my window something about fantastic beasts right yeah and where to find them yeah the zoo the zoo yeah i mean yeah i guess that's uh johnny depp was

a featured player and then they kind of shaved down his his time um which i don't know i guess that's what you can do in a movie you can just like slowly fade a character out right just like uh because he was he was going through troubles at the time and oh i think he's still i think he's still on the outs right i mean i don't know there's a trailer for him playing a photographer real life photographer recently but the um the the the beard wig the fake beard is so bad that i think his career is over oh man i a good, bad mustache or beard of, you know, application. There's one. Oh, what was it? When they showed it up close, it was even faker than it looked far away.

It looked like polyester. Oh, man. It's like the equivalent of a visual horrible accent. It's like you can't get past it yeah yeah yeah um yeah there's a i just watched oh have you seen american hustle that that's like wig central holy shit yeah that's like uh and do you know like christian bale also gained weight for that like does he know that there's prosthetics that you can have and i know and he negated it with his wig like you're like all that work you put on to be convincing as a fat guy well you ruined it

with the fake hair yeah yeah yeah yeah i think bradley cooper has the best hair and he's got tight curls there's the new bradley cooper movie coming out that's like i don't even know what it's about i just saw an ad for it and i was like this sucks tilt a whirl alley or something yeah it's like old-timey circus people murder teacup ride the movie it's yeah it's at a car as a carnival thing yeah nightmare alley oh this sucks i never want to see this and then uh i checked in it's going to be playing at the movie theater down the street so i'm definitely gonna go see it yeah yeah he's like isn be playing at the movie theater down the street. So I'm definitely going to go see it. Yeah. Yeah. He's like,

isn't he's the guy who did the, uh, what do you call it? There? Uh, the, the fish one, the fish guy,

the fish guy, fish guy, the guy who eats. Oh yeah. Yeah. It was directed by fish guy. It might be. Yeah.

Um, Gilmore movie. Gilmore. Yeah. Guillermo. Yeah. Del Toro. Yeah. that's still to this day the fact that it won best picture blows my mind that's such a weirdo like because every other year it's just

like some you know english drama or yeah you know belfast yeah exactly but uh this is the guy fish guy having sex with a land woman a mute woman yeah yeah i mean sales all at this time as far as i'm concerned but um so you're getting through the harry potter series is there any other series that you feel like you've neglected because i feel like i've neglected the harry potter series is there another one that you're like i should probably get into those as well i'm also with lord of the Rings like that. Oh, okay. No, I've done the Lord of the Rings a few times.

The Hobbit, I haven't finished. I have children, and so I've always been like, hey, maybe one day when they're old enough, we'll read the Harry Potter books. And then I'm sure that at a certain point, we'll get to that age and uh the kids will be like no thanks and i'll be like great then you just read the money ball for the 20th time we've had quite enough of that father thank you very much thank you very much whinging and moaning whinging is a good british word whinging and moaning whinging is a good british word whinging and moaning gurning is another one what does gurning mean just whinging moaning yeah um and minging well that's something else over there

you're telling me i've chuffed me binge right i've chuffed my man i. I'm right chuffed. I've right chuffed me minge. Thank you very much. Harry Potter. Who's saying that to him? His aunt? Yeah. Every single actor in there is the most British actor you can think of too. Yeah, that's right. It was all hands on deck for that.

Oh, that's the other thing that bugs me is the stakes are so high where it's like the most evil of evils is coming after you harry potter but oh you don't have a permission slip from your guardian you can't go into the like there's still problems with uh bureaucracy of schools yeah right yeah are those gahool owls guardian owls are those in the harry potter potter world if they're rivals that their rival school is the gahools they hate them they hate them so much here's a series that uh the maze runner ones or the divergent what's that oh yeah but they were all talking like team yeah yeah what is it young fiction what is it called yeah like young adults yeah what's the other one percy jackson i feel like that's another uh maybe maybe your

kids will be percy jackson uh the spy guy um yeah thunder no johnny something storm johnny english is that what you're thinking of yeah the johnny we've been reading the johnny english novels we sit down and the kids fall asleep in one minute i'm laughing my i'm trying to hold up my laughs and my body's heaving as i'm reading oh oh my god oh my god good listen up kids wake up wake up wake up yeah he dropped his gun in the toilet again and again it seems i think i'm too i i don't know why i i think i'm too good for that i love mr bean this this stuff's got to be good too yeah you know absolutely he's i love mr bean and i love black adders that's two for two I don't know what else he's done, but... He was the priest in Four Weddings and a Funeral. That was perfect.

That was bitch perfect. He was Mr. Bean in the movie Mr. Bean. Yeah. And there was a sequel to that that I only found out about recently. Mr. Bean's Holiday, right? Yeah. Yeah. And he talks a lot in it.

Talks more than in the TV show. Bean. Bean. Bean. I've had quite enough of this, thank you very much. Dave, have you ever shown your kids Mr. Bean? That feels like something they could watch and enjoy. I have not. Yeah, that would be good.

That would be a worry if you showed your kids and they didn't think it was funny. Not that you, I don't know, I feel like I'd have to second guess what I think is funny or if, what is it relevant to, is it completely like,

well, in my generation, this is what we all laughed at. It is also like, I feel like if I was young and I was watching something old, I would just write it off out of hand. Right. Like when I was a kid

and my parents tried to show me something from the 70s like deep throat or yeah deep throat manual it's kind of funny dave you're very lucky that we have a video copy of this and then it was in at the video store um but like any of that old stuff like also, a lot of the old movies don't have jokes. Yeah. I mean, what is, what are the big,

there's Woody Allen was big in the seventies. Yeah. It was jokeful. That was, that was very jokeful. I got shown a lot of, you know, like Laurel and Hardy and Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton stuff.

And did you think of that when you were, I think, I think I was pretty, I think I liked a bunch of it and i think yeah they were sort of the mr bean of the silent era yeah yeah yeah i think that there's what did i try watching like the um the marx brothers yeah there's a bunch of great stuff but it's still uh i'm still giving it too much of the benefit of the doubt. Like the, like kind of, uh,

pompous kind of like, Hmm, like timeless kind of chunk. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. I tried showing my kids those Wallace and Gromit, uh,

shorts. Oh yeah. And, uh, I was like, Oh, this is so funny. There's this one part,

which I assumed was the whole thing, where they're like chasing a penguin and they're on the train set and the dog's got to like put the tracks down as the train's going. Meanwhile, the guy is in the wrong trousers. The robot trousers are making him like walk up the wall. It's like a 25 25 minute show and that's two minutes at the end it's like okay let's just fast forward to the part i'd like yeah did they like that one part or did they they did they definitely like that one part and so we have

that in common yeah and like but but yeah back in the day that was all cartoons were just based on old black and white movies because that was the only way that they could go to the next level of like what if this guy got a teapot inside his throat and it was you know whistling or something like that but yeah like uh buster keaton i still enjoy watching him he's like um oh there's there's like undeniable moments of like that's either the craziest thing or it's actually super hilarious yeah there's something about the like the pacing in between where you're waiting for them to get to the funny situation right and

you're reading you're reading screens and whatnot you have to sit through some like, well, it turns out that we have to go to the ball today that requires a certain kind of invitation. Like, oh, we get this invitation. Who is this character that we're hearing? I was trying to do a really bad Laurel and Hardy. That was just like an amalgamation of both of them that just didn't work at all. You'll edit that out, hey? Yeah, yeah, out hey yeah yeah yeah yeah i'm just piano around it oh yeah i forgot you had the piano so yeah that's just like there's the that's the silent movie this is before the

talkies yeah this is yeah this is good uh i think buster Keaton would have been the original TikTok star. I think you're right. I bet you there's some pretty good Buster Keaton TikTok accounts. I don't know that for a fact, but I'm willing to learn. Yeah, I'm mostly, right now, I'm just on Kale TikTok. It's just Kale. Oh, yeah? What's going on with Kale?

You can use it. You can julienne it. You can cut a tin can with it. Wait a minute, Dave. Did you say kale or ginsu? I said ginsu knives. Ginsu knives. Yes, yes. I'm on ginsu TikTok

and it's mostly ginsu knives. Things you can do with them. They slice, they they dice uh yeah that was probably the best commercial when i was younger the the cutting the can open yeah because you don't realize at the time that any knife that is sharpened can go through a empty i broke the tab on my nog can well get out your nog with the ginsu the chicken milk ginsu blade uh Emmett how do

what's your view on eggnog you're wearing an eggnog colored shirt I am the kind of the shirt

the way you're wearing it looks like a Star Trek uniform yeah I got that earlier today

in a zoom meeting and then I had to put the bridge of the enterprise behind me that was pretty good but uh I don't think captain kirk was wearing

cashmere in space in the 25th century so would have been a little too warm up there yeah yeah uh nog i um yeah i'm always into i'm always into the idea of it i'm good for a glass yeah um i'm still drinking last week's i didn't get a new container but i saw you put your icing it down like you're like you had a big mug of it with ice that's what you're drinking earlier did i see that babe no that wasn't it i never put ice in my nog no that was your thing that has the fake ice on it what is your like water bottle have like i don't know what you're talking about oh this what this yes that yeah oh no that's beer this is eggnog okay oh beer and eggnog that's what you've been mixing together yeah that's in your stomach one big no i

i didn't mix them in my stomach i was mixing them in a big punch bowl no you drank them separately that's like you're like making rare bit in your gut right now and it's gonna like curdle merry christmas oh my gut's got the curdles uh curdle tom parker you haven't been eating curdle chicken again have you i nogged and yeasted it's fermenting you're gonna have some strange dreams um no but i like it i like the nutmeg i like the rum yeah um i have i mean you guys covered this last week i heard your heart episode so i don't want to you know trod but this is the only time of year that we're going to have to discuss eggnog. It doesn't, we don't talk about it. But yeah,

it's a, it's a hard one. When you see someone making it, it's like, no, I don't, I don't want to. Yeah.

It's too nasty. What is your favorite seasonal treat? Pumpkin pie. Is that all right? Is that okay to say? Yeah. That's not very original. That's legit.

Yeah. It's a little, it's not as seasonal as it kind of it rules over the fall fall to yeah yeah early winter period for sure seasonal treat uh oh no gingerbread that's yeah yeah you love gingerbread yeah i love gingerbread my favorite too um yeah dave when you build a gingerbread house do you pretend you're a monster when you take it apart i am a monster when i take it apart i do i feel like a monster when i'm like i've eaten so much of this in three days but you can't wait let it wait any longer no yeah exactly i like it to be a little bit soft but also a little bit hard yeah that's how i like my coffee. Penis? Yeah. One hard coffee, please.

Diamond hard, if you don't mind. I used to make a ginger, annually I used to make a gingerbread house with a buddy of mine, and we'd try and do different, like, try and make like a future city, so we'd use like bowls and try and put like domes. Whoa. Oh, wow.

Didn't work. We tried to make a castle didn't work uh we made a sunken a sunken galleon that didn't work and it was like uh we were like oh yeah will you like use nerds for coral around the like we have all these elaborate ideas but to actually push how many years did you do this i'm? Uh, I think we did five or six. And did you, it didn't work. Well, last year didn't work,

but this year let's go even more ambitious. And then one year, the gingerbread was so bad that we couldn't eat it. So we just brought it to the new year's Eve party and like left it out for all the drunkards to like, then obliterate. That's what it took was, was a night of like drunken last night on earth situation to finish that.

So last week, we got a gingerbread house. Well, we went to the bakery and they have like a kit. And they give you the icing and a bunch of stuff to stick on it. And all the pieces are like, there's the roof and the walls and put it together and it was oh it ruled i love it it's my favorite but it does it's too much to eat for one person the kids just want to pick candy off of it yeah and so this uh this uh frosting is it coming like a squeeze bag yeah i was gonna say that's the that's the downfall when you're making it is you're just constantly licking the frosting off your fingers and you're so sick

at the end yeah yeah and i love gingerbread but i don't love it without frosting it's got to have some in every bite yeah um dave what's going on with you sir well i made that gingerbread house it ruled now do you remember when you were a kid did you ever make a gingerbread house by putting a gingerbread around a milk carton that had been cut in half my kids did that but not gingerbread they do it so they do it in school like uh poppy's in kindergarten and they she's got like a grade seven buddy who comes down and they meet once a week and they read together and then like at halloween they carved a pumpkin together and then last week they brought a little milk carton

in and they made a little uh gingerbread house out of graham crackers sure why not delicious delicious and plentiful well it wasn't a gingerbread house then, was it? No, it was not. It was a graham cracker house. So, just say that. Yeah, I said the quiet part loud. But here's what I did this week. The other thing, other than the gingerbread house, is I went to, I got in my car and I drove to America. America. Land of the free? I want to say that's what's on their business card. Yeah, of the dudes.

But a few weeks ago, they made a big announcement that Canadians could now go to America. and like if you fly to america you go for a vacation you gotta pay 200 to get a on your way back and uh but then they made an exemption if you go for less than 72 hours you don't need to get a covid test if you're double vaxxed because everyone knows if you're there for 72 hours covid can't get you yeah it's Yeah. It's like waiting for a mogwai to turn into a gremlin. If you're there 73 hours, COVID. So I went last week. One morning I drove down all by myself. I went to Bellingham, Washington.

Well, first I went to Blaine, Washington. The moment that they announced that Canadians would be able to go. I was like, all right, I'm ordering some stuff to go to our PO box in Blaine, Washington, that I'll be able to pick up, uh, for the first time in, in two years. And so I went, I stopped there. Not all my stuff had arrived. And so I, uh, had to go back another day but that's another story uh so then i drove to uh trader joe's in bellingham filled up my basket with exotic hummuses oh yeah

yeah treat yourself drove to bellingham i drove to target in Bellingham, Washington. Got some stocking stuffers, mostly. Big lighters. Yeah, big lighters, big pens, big razors. And then went to Taco Bell and bought... Abby likes those Doritos tacos. Oh, yeah. The ass busters, they're called. Yeah, yeah tacos oh yeah the ass busters they're called yeah yeah the doritos ass busters so i got six of those those are for the stockings right

yeah just wake up on christmas morning with a stocking just with loose meat put it back together kids put it back together this is a fun activity uh oh and you drive around washington state northern washington state tons of signs up saying welcome back canadians oh that's we missed you yeah just pandering yeah well did you tell me your last your last stop was a hot topic oh i don't know if the hot topic in the mall is there anymore. I didn't go to the mall. I just went to the Target. You didn't get like a spider web belt buckle? That's true. Or like some Panic at the Disco fingerless gloves.

Nice. You guys remember when like the studded belts were the thing? I feel like those are coming back. Yeah, I don't know if they went anywhere. No, maybe you're right. Maybe your punkers kept it alive, you know? Do you guys notice this being the ages, we're all at the same age at this point,

that like leftover coolness is sticking with our generation, but it's not cool anymore? What? Explain this. Boy, we're in the muggle world now. Someone committed to a studded belt in their 20s and it just like that's all they know from here on out same like remember seeing people with mullets for way too long yes yeah that same kind of thing where it's like they're like i know what works this worked for me when i was young

this kept me hip and then they don't let go I feel like uh some of those studded belts or the belts with like the the rings all the way around oh yeah yeah are still are there's just some people that will have that forever or like a thick gauntlet wrist band yes yeah yeah yeah but you're in your 40s and you got like a really yeah what's yours mine what's your thing that you're holding on to from when you were cool my hair nice good pick yeah no that's not true i'm i'm losing some of it what do you think what's the long-term plan there balding wise are you at like yeah what is the your parents or your grandparents what is what is their situation uh mom's dad it was pretty thin uh i don't mind

if it all goes evenly but it's like the patchiness right i think if you make it to 40 you're like it's good i'd like did i lost the chunk main chunk, but here it just kind of continues. But there's like a little, this line here, you guys can see it. Yeah. Oh, yeah. This line here. Yeah, that's a nightmare. And the left side is further back than the right side.

Oh, man. Oh, man. You check your birth certificate. You might not be 40 yet. Yeah, I should have held on to some cool thing for too long. Frosted tips. Go back to get that studded belt. Go to Hot Topic. Studded belt, I'll get

a frosted tip. Or like, yeah, I'll wear a trucker hat. I was walking by a vintage store this morning and they have an entire giant rack of Von Dutch trucker hats. So they're back, baby. Have you seen the Von dutch documentary no i'm gonna watch it tonight i'm gonna watch it tonight i'm so excited it's there's three parts to it

well i'll watch all three i don't care i got nowhere to be in the morning well like we will in our age group we will see a guy with a blazer and a hoodie at the same time yeah oh yeah that's been happening for 20 years though yeah but until the day they die though that's the thing it's like oh sure like john mayer john mayer probably still sports that look and also michael cera i want to say but maybe that's just more of the george michael thing i'm projecting i literally can't tell the difference between john mayer and michael cera well they both play guitar so true yeah one's got a cool sleeve tattoo well they both dated taylor swift and what are the other commonality jennifer annis they've both done

stand-up comedy to wild of applause and uh and uh you're coming out with a new album anyway so uh america's great i went to america um it was very fast it was five minutes over the border going south about half an hour coming north uh and then going to going south no one they don't care about your vaccine at all right i don't care about anything and then coming north it's you need to have registered your vaccine on on an app and uh so they didn't slap it, like shoot a timer into your neck saying with 72 hours. That's weird. Cause they didn't, they didn't,

they didn't ask me, they asked me how long I was gone, but they didn't check. They weren't like, prove it, prove you were only gone for four hours. You buy some gum coming in and then some gum. Well,

yeah, it was like, I took pictures on my phone that morning that I was like, this is in Vancouver. This is going to be my I stopped at a store and I had like a receipt from Vancouver that morning. Holding up the day's newspaper.

Yeah, exactly. With your rifle. Yeah. And then so the next so then a few days later I saw that my packages had arrived. And I was like, okay, I'm just going to go for a super quick trip across the border. And I went down. I was in America for 10 minutes, drove back up, and then I went the way up.

They said, you've been randomly selected to get a COVID test. Oh, wow. So that was today. Why not though? Oh, that's what you were saying you had to do and i was like oh he's making fun of he said you had to do an online covet test i was like i had to do it's not a thing i had to so they give you a box with a covet test in it and put your nostril against the camera yeah it's in there i could see and a nurse also working from home uh leads you through how you do it and you have to prove like you have to show her things as you go you like make like she she needs to see you put it in yeah

your nose yeah and that's one of the things she corrects you on right away no no no no no although it's very impressive uh and then uh yeah it's like you fill out the like a little requisition for me you have to hold that up and she reads it and oh wow and she's like uh and then fedex picks it up and so this is the americans doing this or this is canadian this is canada this is canada and i don't know if i am under quarantine right now oh interesting like no one told me that oh you know what if you go just put a paper bag on your head that's a a nice, even medium. Yeah, it lets people know that I'm ashamed of my local sports team, that I'm an anonymous comedian. Yes, yes.

Does it all. Yeah. Possibly the elephant man. Yeah, sure. So, yeah. Your face is a sandwich. That's true. I'm a takeout. I'm a giant takeout man. So, yeah, I've been traveling, doing a lot of traveling across the uh i-5 nice that's gotta be exciting that's your first time in the states in almost two years i assume yeah yeah i would think about two years i don't remember the last

thing i ordered to pick up from my post office box but i mean i've found that being kind of novel over time is like going to any other city let alone another country to feel the quote-unquote covid vibe there yeah yeah because i've just been so used to all the protocols in my immediate routine but to go like i went to victoria and just being like oh yeah it's here too isn't it yeah i can tell you from going through small towns on the way to calgary every small town looks at you like you're an alien if you're wearing a mask yeah i know like you don't i've never felt so stared at in my entire life as when I walked down the street. Oh, that's not the rules here? So no one's doing it?

Yeah. Cool, you guys. Cool. Oh, we can get our own sugar here? Everybody touches this part of the cafe? Well, COVID's not interesting to us in the small time. It's only big time folk. That's right.

We're pretty simple. We're meat and potatoes people here. Now, why would a virus have any interest in a little old me? I'm not putting on airs. Speaking of coffee and sugar and stuff, the other day I was at the coffee shop and I buy a bag of coffee at the coffee shop and they give you a free cup of coffee if you buy a bag of coffee. And so I made my order and they gave me a cup of coffee. And there was someone over at the like sugar area, the milk and sugar area. Yeah. And I was like, oh, the milk and sugar area. Yeah.

And I was like, oh, I'll wait until they're done. I'll just wait here for them to give me my bag of coffee. I was going to go over and just get everything done and grab my bag and go. You didn't have a designated stirrer? What? A designated stirrer who works there with proper gloves and to stir your coffee? No, it was just another customer was ahead of me in the milk area. That's what I call my chest.

Is that right? The milk area? This story's not good enough to get interrupted five times. What are you talking about? There's already stirring milk. milk and so i then i finally got my my coffee beans and i was like okay i'll go over the person was still there 30 seconds later and so i was like okay well i'll just wait for them to finish and then a line started forming behind me to wait to go to i just needed a bit of milk in the lid for my honking at you honk honk yeah and then uh i was watching and the person was just stirring and

they weren't like adding more things they had were just stirring for like a minute what was the isn't there a movie where i said it was a good story like isn't there a movie where somebody's stirring coffee maybe it's practical magic and then the coffee stir just goes by itself this is a ring any have you seen this yet in the harry potter that might be in harry potter yeah although it's all it's not coffee it's frightfully tea thank you very much it's brundle froth butterbe. That's the real one, isn't it? It's a carafe of Brundle Froth. But this person's stirring,

at least were they like staring longingly out in the distance or something? Oh, no. Yeah. They had lost their mind. Just stirring with their whole hand. Yeah. There was, they were hypnotized. They had to.

Honey, I'm going to go and stir for a bit. Is that you're cool? Okay. I won't be here when you're back or ever again. Yeah. I'll be a while. We gotta, we gotta check our relationship. This is all of it.

It's all stirring based. Yeah. We gotta check our relationship. That's what I'm always telling Abby. Abby, it's time to check our relationship. Let's check our relationship. How's what i'm always telling abby abby it's time to check our relationship how are you doing stirring wise so i went to america it was great i recommend going to taco bell they have a lot of vegetarian options they're coming to america i think they have taco bell here but it's so much more fun to do it in america where it's a little bit taboo oh if i had taco

time in my stalking as a kid i'd be so disappointed yeah that's true you want the you want the one that's i want the real thing i want you want taco bell yeah you want ground chihuahua ground chihuahua in every bite of taco bell come on it is that's like not even a new reference wasn't there't they still Chihuahua? No. What are they now? They're everything. They're run for the border.

Graham, what's going on with you this holiday season? I, you know, I'm a fairly recent car owner. I haven't owned a car for a very, very long time. And so now I have a car. And with that comes car owner. I haven't owned a car for a very, very long time. And so now I have a car, and with that comes car trouble. Oh, no. So the other day I went to go hop in the old car. I was going to go to Taco Bell and I was going to go eat a gordita. Shut up. Oh, you were going to have a ground chihuahua, you freaking lunatic. But I got in the car.

The car wouldn't respond to the little beep guy. And so I had to get in using the manual key. And then it was not doing anything. It wasn't turning over or whatever. So I was like, I assume this is a battery thing. But then I don't know anything about cars. So how would I know? So then I called BCAA.

And I was like, can you just do one time? Like, I pay you $50 or whatever, and you can fix my car? And they were like, no, but you can join up. And so I was like, ah, they really got me here. I guess I'm becoming a member of BCAA. And she took my information right there while I was standing on the street corner. And then she said, it'll be about an hour and a half. And I was like, well, that's fine, because I'm by my house. But what if I was it'll be about an hour and a half i was like well that's

fine because i'm by my house but what if i was just on the highway an hour and a half jesus and then i called out an hour and a half and the woman said she she shouldn't have said an hour and a half she should have said three hours so they'll be a three hour window um which uh this is just to fix a fob problem like uh this is like yeah get a jump i assume that's what i did okay okay um and i thought i thought about uh texting dave but i was like uh what if it's not and then he comes over here and it doesn't work then what do you do yeah but but then wouldn't i feel i'd feel good to be able to i don't even i wouldn't even jump you i have a plug-in battery charger. Oh, cool.

What, like, do you go in your garage or how does it work? You, well, you plug it into whatever. Oh, right. Extension cord all the way from your house to Graeme's car? Well, presumably there's a plug closer. Yeah. Well, is Vancouver a city, like is Calgary, everybody's just got a plug on the side of their house because they need to plug in their car overnight. But like Vancouver doesn't have just exterior plugs, does it?

I don't know. Yeah, me neither. But there's, I mean, people have Christmas lights. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. What are you going to do? You're going to unplug someone's Christmas lights for your car? No.

No, but it's not the season. You can piggyback them on the end. Yeah, yeah. your car no no it's not the season you can piggyback them on the end yeah yeah um so then uh the guy came and he was like you know when you meet somebody who really loves their job no who's just excited to be there and it's also making a face like i'm saying something crazy this guy loved being a tow truck driver he loved it he was talked about what a great day he's had only person i've ever seen who loves their job regis philbin and he's dead man oh man man oh man did that guy love his job holy shit um yeah yeah and he you had to go through many different co-hosts he still loved it he still loved it yeah um but But so the guy came in, he was like, yeah, it's the battery.

But he said the battery is completely dead. So it's not just like if I put the things on it, it'll start and you'll be fine. He said, OK, I'm going to start it up. We'll start it up, start it up. And he's like, OK, now sit in it for an hour. I was like, for an hour. Jesus Christ. So he's like, sit in it for an hour.

He said this all very excitedly though yeah he was like so here's the problem he like so excited i love my job so here's the deal the battery's dead and you're gonna get to sit for an hour yeah exactly where are you planning to go five hours ago at this point um yeah where i was just gonna always gonna run to a store to buy shoes and then um so i'm shoeless uh yeah i waited until my shoes went or my feet went right through the shoes buster keaton style and then uh come up to the shoe store barefoot um but yeah so then i had to sit in the car for an hour and then he said you

have to drive it like he said like you got to drive a super long distance like you got to drive it out to ubc and back and i was like okay talking it's like as fast as you can your car is like an old v8 from like 1971 you gotta like yeah yeah let it heat up and rev it and then drive it out it's like coax it like an animal. Yeah, it's like a woman. You got to touch it just right. I love my job. He did.

He loved his job so much. He was like, can I take her out? You know what? I'm going to take her car for an hour. Yeah. The sitting in the car was fine because it felt like I was on a stakeout. So that was fine. You have to sit in the car was fine because it felt like i was on a stakeout so that was that was fine you have to sit in the good lord and it's not like it was that it's not in that cold you're not

in no but this you know like um something had been left on and slowly drained the battery but then he said if it doesn't work you'll have to get a tow and you'll have to take it to a garage and it will take five hours to power up your battery i was like now why couldn't what about a new battery well the battery's fine it was just it had been emptied out of juice by do you ask how many vacation days you have left take off of work or he's like you know he's like the new hire i'll take i'll take vacation days i'll do it i love it um well people who don't love their job love vacation days i mean not this guy no this guy he's excitable at all of it um anyways you'll be happy to know the battery works car still good to go now after quite an adventure. That's great. Are you suspicious every time you fire it up, though? Yes.

Yeah. Because, well, now I've got this membership, so I'm on Easy Street. Yeah. Corner of Easy Street and Carpool. You can only use it like three or four times a year, though. And then they charge you. I don't want to have any more than four times a year. That means the car is on its way out if it's four times a year.

Are you discovering with every convenience of the car is on its way out if it's four times a year are you discovering with every convenience of the car there's an inconvenience like is it is it is there something weighing like is there a pro and con that like it's constantly neutralizing yeah gas here is insanely expensive like it's it's on and beyond just like rationing or whatever. It's just so, so expensive here. Yeah. Insurance is crazy expensive. Yeah. It's got a monopoly.

Uh, and like, yeah. Maintenance. If you ever have like a problem with your car, that's going to cost a ton. And, uh,

yeah. I mean, like I like it. Cause then you just hop in and, you know, we'll get down to it. I mean, the one plus side is that beautiful women in wet t-shirts are always

lining up to wash cars yeah but that why is it whenever i go to the wash cars it's the firemen why are they and they've washed me with that high-powered hose yeah is that is that the same is that the same thing as the bikini i guess i mean a different stroke yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. Yeah, but no, having a car is both a blessing and a curse. Yeah, you don't have one. Do you have one? No, I mean,

this summer, I guess this is something I could have talked about. Talking about Harry Potter. I went to space! No. In my cashmere. No, I mean, I spent a chunk of the summer on the island in the rural town of souk and so i needed a car right to do anything and so it was kind of i hadn't driven

in years really and so i i rented of all things because is all that was available was like a 2002 PT cruiser. Weird. Yeah. Yeah. And I thought, I thought I was going to be, I thought I was gonna be super embarrassed the whole time driving around, but it turns out that's where they all go to live.

It's at the island. It's Vancouver Island. It's like, it's like a refuge. It's a sanctuary for all. But, but yeah, just things that you just constantly be like,

if it's not gas, some light will come on and you're going like, uh, why, what does that light mean? Yeah. And then some mysterious liquid emanates from the bottom of it when you've parked it for a while.

And I'm like, okay, is that cool? And I don't, there's, yeah, you got to do the taste test. If it's, if it it's coolant the one thing i didn't realize about cars is they have all these like channels for water to go when it rains like so the all the like cracks between

you know your hood and everything and then when you park your car for a while on a dry day and you're like why is there so much water so much liquid underneath it's just old water yeah and also uh this car i don't know if every car is like this but it's liquid in it. It's just old water. Yeah. And also this car, I don't know if every car is like this, but it's particularly adept at filling up every crack with leaves. But yeah, like when I went out to the car, I was like a bird had shit on it. I was like, oh man, this sucks. And in my head, I was like, this is going to be the worst part of this car trip is having to deal with this i was wrong no no but you're driving around in a shitty car like a literally shitty car yeah yeah it's always filthy um uh do you guys want wait before we move on to anything yes sir graham is it time for our annual secret santa exchange? Yeah. I was going to do overhands and then switch it, but you got there first.

I've been privy to this. I haven't been. I haven't. Okay. Wow. Yeah. Don't worry. Look under your chair.

We. Okay. Now. Okay. He's gone. Oh, it's a sock. Cool. I hope you enjoy it.

Yeah. It's from both of us. Yeah. You couldn't have each bought me one sock? Yeah. Do you like them? Dave and I left... Dave left out

bags for me. I left out a bag for him. I said... Graham was like, oh, I can come over at like 2 o'clock and I was like, I might be having an online COVID test. Which I thought was a joke and I was like he he ha ha now graham you've given me two things here yeah we got ourselves we got each other again for secret santa yeah is there something you would like me to open first uh no i mean either or either or works i'm gonna do the envelope okay now this is a card in

uh looks like it's like i want to say christmas card no it is uh oh god um now it's a birthday card with uh jim parsons from uh the oh he plays old sheldon on big bang theory uh and it says oh please don't cry because you're getting older but getting older is crossed out and graham has written bazinga i can tell from the thickness of this card that it might make a little noise when i open it or will it oh no it's not thick with that surprises from within it says now go enjoy your bazinga xoxo gossip girl yeah i thought it was thick with a little speaker but it's just a bunch of 90210 cards what are these oh a real diverse a bunch of trading cards there's a debbie gibson card yeah listeners have sent in some cards over

the years because of the our association with the card guys uh-huh um i've still never met them no oh i was on that episode and i did a an impression of alan rickman who was in harry potter oh that's right you did right yeah why it all comes around this is a uh empire strikes back card uh with uh han and leia and it says blooming romance which i think i i think you're supposed to say with an australian accent is a blooming romance um let's see some yo mtv Raps cards. Third Bass, oh my. I don't know this band. Oh my goodness. These were like Superstars music cards.

They had the Debbie Gibson card, and now they have a card for this band, Energy Orchard. Yeah, I left that in there because I thought Energy Orchard would be a pretty cool thing to discover. Oh, a Jim F uh pro set golf card yeah a magnum pi card of uh higgins doing some kind of martial art yeah yeah uh wwe card uh this is a oh chicago Blackhawks team card with Steve Larmer on it, former NHL Ironman. The Rocketeer movie card. The Rocketeer had a cool pose.

Did you see this movie? I used to own that on VHS. It's great. It really holds up. I never saw it. It was good. Looked too hokey. Too guy in a weird suit.

Show it to your kids. see if they like it see if they like rocket heavy d and the boys um tv raps card uh queen latifah umt dear rom-com moonraker uh james bond moonraker card oh uh kirk mclean knucks all-star pro set card we're not we're in a little turtleneck Wearing a little turtleneck A Country Music Association Card of Doug Kershaw Some fiddlers

Yeah Wow He wore his nicest figure skating outfit that day Yeah I can't imagine a less exciting Magnum PI card than magnum pi sleeping uh two what look to be drink tickets yeah two drink tickets so you can have those drinks and a five dollar bill five dollar bill crisp five dollar bill and uh you also have given me this box well let me open something okay

yeah that's how eclectic an array of cards is that that's amazing that was those were sent in by a listener or several listeners i do not remember but that was eclectic eclectic af yeah exactly okay what am i gonna take there's a shirt in here oh i mean this is fantastic your lovely wife abby who's also her own person got this from costco yeah peppermint bark your favorite yeah killy's heel uh it's so great i feel like we thank you so much we got it for you two months ago and you said uh hey come by anytime and you said how about Tuesday? And we were like, we're not around Tuesday. And you never rescheduled. That's right.

So I got that. That's wonderful. Should I open it or take this other thing out? Yeah. It's a t-shirt. It's got... Where the fuck did you even find this it's a chris delia merch shirt from a tour that he did called follow the leader oh my god how many dates he did uh that's a million cities uh So I ordered something on eBay.

I ordered a pair of shorts. I bought a pair of shorts that I wanted. And then they came in the mail and the person included this shirt. And I opened up the package and I laughed so hard when I saw what, why, why? So there was just a free thing i got but like he was just using it as bubble wrap kind of thing i'll just use my crystalia t-shirt yeah there's also your uh

hamburgers and whoopier stick oh yeah it comes in here very exciting and then i'll open this box i'll open this box oh no it Cards. Yep. You know it. I'll be up all night pursuing my trivia. This is, if people are new to the podcast, this is in reference to my favorite story of Dave's where he got in trouble, where his dad came up to his room while he was supposed to be studying, and he was just sitting there reading Trivial Pursuit Cards. And so I gave you lots of those so you can play and they're

90s it is okay can we do some trivia right now yes please yes now you guys remember the 90s yeah yeah absolutely so this will be from the meech lake accords is that what the yeah yeah what are these categories oop oop i don't know what that would be. Who was celibate for nine years before writing the world's best-selling book on relationships? The men are from Mars, folks. Ruth. Oh, Dr. Ruth. John Gray. Is John Gray the men are from Mars?

Possibly. That's very 90s. Yeah, that is very 90s. Fifty Shades of Grey. Oh, yeah. That's him. This is the category W-I- very 90s. Yeah, that is very 90s. Fifty Shades of Grey. Oh, yeah. What? This is the category W-I-R, were. Yeah.

What field of study did Apple researchers boast about with T-shirts reading, I helped Apple wreck a nice beach? What? What field of study did Apple researchers boast about with T-shirts reading, I helped Apple wreck a nice beach. Something about a ship? Like a boat? Speech recognition. I don't know. Beach? Maybe it's like a

plan work. I don't like these cards. Oh, get to the Beach League Accords. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's some good stuff in there. VWG. Are these all? Because this has the year 19. Yeah. What nation Exported 2 million snake skins Per year until the 1990s

When the practice was banned Mexico India India yes What rap group were allowed to be As nasty as they want to be at a Florida obscenity trial? Beastie Boys? No.

Two Live Crew. Two Live Crew. Two Live Crew. Nice, nice, nice. And what color of necko wafer- Bums and poo and pee and farts and- Is most likely to create a spark in low humidity when broken? What color of necko wafer?

Blue. Green. Is blue an option? option oh the answer is pink pink pink of course blue is an option graham i don't know from necco wafers me neither um well those are great i also because uh i think it's very silly to give uh these silly gifts i i've also made a donation in your name to the Vancouver Food Bank. And I have made a donation in your name to a donkey refuge. I get monthly updates about the donkeys. You're helping these donkeys. They're doing very well. Well, it's not really in my name if you're the one getting the donkey updates. I'll forward it. I'll forward it to your address. Now, also I found in the bag

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We're not going to have time for overheards this time, but bye. Bye. Jingle bells, jingle bells. Okay, let's do some overheards. Okay. This week on Maximum Fun's Pro Wrestling Podcast, Jingle bells, jingle bells Okay, let's do some overhearts Okay This week on Maximum Fun's Pro Wrestling Podcast Tights and Fights

Austin Creed, best known as WWE's Xavier Woods, tells us why his fans Find him so easy to love So I think it's less me being good At it and more people wanting To be a part of something And it's very easy to be a part of these things Because I constantly am screaming

about what I'm interested in. Boston Creed on the perfect wrestling podcast Tights and Fights. Find it on Maximum Fun or wherever you get your podcasts. Overheard. Overheard is a magical segment here on the podcast

if you're out in if you're three men from orientar and beware it's probably loaded and it'll explode it yeah. I was teaching my kids the funny versions of the Christmas carols, and I forgot about that one. Yeah, that's a good one. My kids know Jingle Bells, Batman Smells, Robin Laid an Egg, but they don't know Batman. Yeah, that's a weird one. I was like, okay, do you know what the Batmobile is?

And they were like, no, but I know it lost his wheel. And Joker got away. Who's Joker? And they said, Harley Quinn's boyfriend? Yeah. That's canon. I thought it was Joker does ballet. Yeah, that's one option.

It still sounds weird. No one does ballet. What do you do? I do ballet. Oh yeah, I know. I do ballet. Joker took ballet. like i took a correspondence yeah but i think he ran away that's classic joke sure yeah he got away he got away well because the batmobile lost its wheel and batman smells so yeah of course he does in that rubber suit are you kidding me oh man does he have to wash that suit every night because i think i've seen it depicted in mad magazine that he just has a closet full of them you know what's uh great in the um you know how there's that new robert pattinson batman coming out

yeah they're very batman they uh fully uh leaned into him putting on eyeshadow like uh there's a scene where i guess when he takes off his mask and he's got full black makeup around his eyes right so it it means it's in canon that bruce wayne he's like i'm putting on the suit alfred he goes and he's like the mascara alfred he's like getting there he takes the time to do there's like a little blush around the cheek yeah it's a special As a lip liner Powder or something like that

Pinch his cheek To break some blood vessels Um Alright alright Overheard I also was telling them Deck the halls with Poison ivy

Oh Oh I don't know that Deck the halls with Poison ivy Well deck the halls with Santa's balls of course Deck the halls with Poison ivy

Yeah that's the one I know This is the season to be naughty Break a window Pop a tire follow la la la la like your teacher's house hair on fire hair on fire yeah that won't get you in trouble man no um you like their house on fire that's a crime but you can you can do hair yeah that's true yeah um all right here we go overheards segment where if you hear things out there in the world bring them unto us unto this child uh we always like to start with the guest amit do you have an overheard uh yeah i kind of got a pretty weak overseen i'll start with and i got one of those two we're starting with you have more than one well just because this

is so bad can we loop around and then i will do a really a really good overheard slash overseen by association okay um so today i was walking uh to the sky train and a tesla drove by and inside that tesla the driver was vaping at the same time that's my overseen it seems okay that's not bad at all yeah it's a tesla driver smoking a cigarette today no but you can't be no no don't smoke a cigarette you gotta vape it's like it's it's one level of technology to match another yeah that's right they're disturbers oh graham graham smoked cigarettes in his uh olds Camaro. Yeah, my Coupe de Ville. Old Valiant, 1965 Chrysler Valiant or whatever.

Yeah, when you see one, occasionally there's a fancy old car like that out in front of somebody's house. You're like, how the fuck was this the way people got around, this gigantic chunk of metal? Oh, have you ever driven something like that? It's where it has no power steering? It did in high school.

Yeah, it's insane. It takes 11 revolutions of the steering wheel to make a corner. It's just, it's really hard. Yeah. And that feeling of sitting there waiting for a steel beast to warm up. And you look in your rear view mirror and Gene Hackman's chasing you. Yeah, totally. Dave, do you have an overheard?

Yeah, I've got a couple. You've got a couple? Holy shit. Well, this isn't really like, so I got these, I picked up a pair of pants from my post office box in America and I brought them home and i had to get hemmed so i uh you know i'm not about getting them i measured uh how short i wanted them and i put pins in to like uh this is how short i wanted them i brought them to the dry cleaner and he uh because they they they can hem them there and so i so I showed them to him and he said,

oh, you already have the pins in here. And he goes, English isn't his first language. I won't do an accent. No, come on. We have, it's Christmas time. No, no. And he, so he said, oh, you already put the pins in here. Good customer.

So he says, oh, you already put the pins in here. Good customer. And then so he's like entering the order into the system. He says, what's your phone number? And I'm like, 604. And he says, oh, good customer. Not only did you pin your own pants, you know your phone number. was he wasn't like my dream those are some good digits of all the numbers you can use those are those are the good ones i don't know what he meant i love it i love that maybe he just that morning saw something

on tv that was good customer he's like i'm gonna use yeah i'm gonna use that today at least once that's my catchphrase um so i uh my other overheard is a very nice one it was just uh poppy who's four turning five on christmas eve uh we have a dog named monster and uh it was very cute she said monster come here and he came over licked her once and walked away and she said one single kiss doesn't help me dog adorable adorable strikes again yeah good customer yeah yeah yeah what is it one lick one kiss won't help me dog one single kiss doesn't help me it's true though you want multiple kisses from a dog yeah um uh mine is uh i would say barely counts in the uh this is i was uh writing to somebody who has recently had a baby oh and i i wrote uh i heard through the grapevine that you've had a and i wrote ba

and the predictive text was Baba Duke. I guess I use that word multiple times on my phone. So that's why it assumes that I'm interested, but yeah, Baba Duke. Dave, are you looking at a trading card? I'm not, I'm looking at more trivia. Okay. So I can do this. Uh,

whose last words were reported as Jesus. I love you by a nun and I can't breathe by a doctor. These are two separate people. Same person. Oh, but two, two different, two different, uh,

reports of their last words. I can't breathe. Robocop? Yeah, it was Robocop. Yeah, Robocop. Mother Teresa. Oh, she's a doctor. I didn't know this.

Yeah, me neither. Okay, don't get more 90s than this. Here we go. Oh, they also have a year. So these are all 1997. Oh, I see. Okay. What trendy website hypnotized hordes of fans with

peppy animations of cavorting rodents? Walt Disney? No. Cavorting rodents? The hell? What was the question? It was hamsterdance.com. Oh. That's how old that is is that what i guess so that was hamster dance anyway uh the internet at the beginning was so

stupid yeah it's so good now it's so good amit did you did you did you have another or that yeah yeah no i got a this one this will make up for the pretty sad one but it's not i didn't see this my girlfriend saw this at the very beginning girlfriend yeah man have you had her for more than two years uh into the beginning of the pandemic into the beginning well so like so two months before the pandemic struck up a relationship okay nice well that's great and it's yeah yeah, it's carried me through these wretched times. Well, that's great. I'm happy. She experienced this at the very beginning.

During all the, everyone's scam, like everyone freaking out, to get every uh hoarding items of stuff anyway yeah on the bus i might have be paraphrasing this a little bit someone gets on the bus with uh holding mcdonald's and sits down and starts telling people like well i was i was down i was i don't know i was just down at at the grocery store trying to get some milk. It's all gone. All the milk's gone. So what choice did I have? I had to go to McDonald's and get milkshakes.

I was going to use my milk for good purpose. But they're all, okay, well, I guess I'm going to have to get a pre-made. Siv out the lactose. I don't know what you're going to say.ose i mean there's plenty of calcium in here what uh i was trying to think because i've been drinking all this milk nog to get strong and this bone's good bone it is eggnog and uh i was thinking what seasonal milkshakes does mcdonald's have other than the Shamrock? Did they do like a pumpkin or a... I think they did a pumpkin like when it was at the height of that. Did they do an eggnog? Did they do a cinnamon one?

I think they do an eggnog one. Yeah. Or maybe it's Dairy Queen. Seems like a thing Dairy Queen would do. Eggnog. No, Dairy Queen's very classy. I mean, they are the queen. Burger King and Dairy Queen are the two classiest.

Everyone knows it. Now, we also have... Remember the dancing baby? Remember that? Oh, don't get me started. Now, we also have overheard sent in from people all over the map if you want to send one in send it into spy at maximum fun dot org and uh let me just find these but i had them up but you know what it's been a long day so there they are It's been a long day, so there they are.

Oop. Okay, here we go. Three juicy overheards coming your way. This is Josh in Arlington, Virginia. Dave, you'll like the beginning of this story. He had to use the bathroom in Target. I love the bathroom. He threw up at a Dairy Queen. Dave, you'll love this.

So he was using the bathroom and then the stall next to me was a man who had completely removed his pants and shoes and was listening to an audio book version of the Old Testament on his phone. A full volume. Oh, is that like, is that just somebody like having a really bad day or do you think this is part of the routine oh yeah sure you got to separate them cheeks like the red sea that sounds like a two-life crew lyric This next one comes from Maggie in Brooklyn, New York. Hey Maggie, thanks for writing in to us. Happy holidays and may God have mercy on your soul.

Yeah, use a designated driver this holiday season. Arrive alive is what we want you to do. Arrive alive. On a Brooklyn street on a Saturday morning, a late 40-ish man in a Chicago Bears hoodie burps out loud without trying to diminish it. Then as people turned to see who burped, he said to no one in particular, Hello, I just moved here 42 years ago happy anniversary yeah this is a guy who's i say celebrating life going outside burping at full

volume burping and moving have you ever like really like had a very satisfying burp when you're in the house by yourself yeah yeah never Yeah. Never in public, though. No, I would never burp in public. I would rather just hold onto it until it tears a hole in my stomach. Or just that kind of swallow. Yeah, hopefully you didn't pick up those of mine too bad on the... No, we use a filter.

So every time you burp, the word Harry Potter comes up. Hooray. This last one comes from Doug. It's a bumper sticker. Actually, there are two bumper stickers. One of them is an old Honda in the grocery store parking lot that had

a sticker that read, teachers do it nine months out of the year. That's funny, and everybody knows what that means and a giant pickup truck in front of me in traffic had a sticker that read milf man i love fishing dang it that's a joke you could share with your with your grandpapa he would enjoy but would he know what a milf is well i'd happily explain to him what the yeah yeah my grandfather stiffler he's he could be technically he could be a grandfather well technically you and i could be

grandfathers how do you know i'm not i don't know but technically you could be that's weird weird it's a lot of responsibility. Yeah. Dave, do you have, are there overheards on your end of the phone? I guess so. I was just pausing for a moment to consider, you know, my seed. Stirring a coffee cup for a minute. So where did I put this plug? I got to plug it in. And then here we go.

In addition to overheards that are written, and we also accept your phone calls. If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one. Ugh. SpyPod 1. I still use this. You got to trust your own rhythm. You know what I mean?

I know. I don't, though. I never will trust it. I've been betrayed by your own rhythm, you know what I mean? I know. I don't, though. I never will trust it. I've been betrayed by my own rhythm. Well, the rhythm's gonna get you. Yeah, this is the rhythm of the night. Of the night. That's as high as I can go.

Hey, Dave and Graham, this is Jim from Pennsylvania calling you in overheard. I was in the checkout lane at Walmart with a couple next to it in the checkout lane at Walmart. There was a couple next to it in the next lane over. And the guy says, hey, grab me an energy drink. Get the orange can. The blue one is disgusting.

So the girl goes over to the little refrigerator cooler and looks and goes, they don't have any orange ones. They only have the blue. And the guy goes, okay, I'll take a blue. All right, off I go. Yeah, you know, it's just the way rubber are. In these times, just for measures. Yeah. They were all out of milk. I had to get a milkshake. They were all out of

blue. I had to get an orange or whatever. And when it comes to, like, Powerade, that kind of thing, what's your favorite? What's your go-to? I'll take it home and I'll get the blue out of it. And I'll put my own coloring in. When it comes to that, I think the most recent one I had would have been about 15 years ago.

And it was like the clear-ish purpley one. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Looks like. But not the deep color. Yeah, yeah. Not. Yeah. Yeah. Looks like, but not the deep, not the Duke deep color. Like, yeah. Yeah.

Not the Duke color one. Not the Barbicide. I don't know. I, there's something about the blue that I find enticing, but yeah, I think if I drink after, I,

it's orange is your safest bet. I think orange is it. Yeah. Orange. And you guys do this. I'm assuming after you do your many, many I think orange is it. Yeah. And you guys do this. Uh, I'm assuming, uh, after you do your many,

many CrossFit workouts. Yes, yes, yes. It's a reward. And also you need that. I drink four liters of chocolate milk after every exercise. Well,

I get food poisoning once a week. I make sure to, so I need to replenish my electrolytes. Yeah. And none of this has to do with latent alcoholism no no no no no no no no all right here's your next phone call hi dave and graham and possibly amazing guests this is heidi from reno nevada i'm calling with an overseen there was a van uh with a bunch of mickey head things on the window, you know, saying how many people are in the family.

And then in big letters at the bottom of the van, it said, super duper fun time shit bus. Have a great day. Super duper fun time shit bus? Bus. Bus. Shit bus. Okay. Yeah.

That makes sense. That's just where you can get away with because shit bus is a thing that's the name of a car yeah there's a function to it it's a mitsubishi shit bus um you know on a long enough time scale they would start naming cars swear words because they would just run out of words they're running out of like elantra and they do name an awful lot of them just numbers and letters though yes there's a five or a four but everyone that they like you know there's just a like is there a renegade is that a type of car i'm sure there must be it must be boy i want to say it's like a jeep jeep renegade that sounds like so you get like a honda sb yeah yeah yeah yeah honda shit shit bus oh yeah the honda shit bus yeah which one does jeremy renner drive that's a jeep right he was jeep yeah yeah gotta get to that concert the main attraction. Do you know some of his song?

Kicking up dust and down, you know. Oh, I think I went down the rabbit hole like so many other people did. With Renner? With the Renner music video Jeep. The Renner app. Yeah. It was, it's a nightmare. Yeah. Because you just start start thinking you put your place you put your brain into his brain being like what would why would i make these choices i don't think

yeah i think he's just a money-making machine yeah but he wants to make music he's like still he still feels like he's got i'm a nomad and i've got when i saw him in that american hustle i couldn't not see i couldn't not see so uh good for me that's good i spend most of my time trying not to not see yeah uh i couldn't uh his character i couldn't get over the fact that it was jeremy renner he just yeah he's wearing a wig and doing an accent but i was like that's just jeremy renner i can't get over the fact that every week apple tv sends me a notification that a new episode of his tv show is on the least compelling character of the entire assemblage of the avengers gets his own show if you say so it all looks terribly uncompelling to me.

Here's your final overheard. Hello, Dave Graham and delightful guest. This is Brian in Minneapolis. I work in a high school and I overheard this from a student before school this morning. All that build up. All that

waiting for the volleyball unit. Just to have three days of it? We wait all year. We wait all year for this. They build it up like, oh, when we finally get around to volleyball, you'll be spiking. You'll be setting. You'll be bumping. They hire a whole ad company marketing campaign,

building it up. They make it seem like we're going to be doing months and months of volleyball. Yeah. But then, my algorithm. Fee lousy days. All my algorithm is,

is just volleyball is building up. Volleyball was pretty fun. And gym? It was okay. It's one of those I could get behind. Although it does hurt your hands. It hurts your hands. And also if you slide to like,

crazy burns, crazy burns. I could never do the overhand. It was always. Oh yeah. You got to do the underhand and you feel like you hit it just right off your like, uh,

wrist bone, like thumb, thumb meat. It really hurts. Yeah. New at Colonel Chickens bum meat Merry Christmas

everybody from all of us here at Colonel Chickens oh chickens have thumbs um well that does

that brings us to the end of the episode Emmett thank you so much for being our guest oh hey guys it's uh

quite the privilege to be on the Christmas episode I got to witness in real time the exchange yeah guys it's uh quite the privilege to be on the christmas episode i i got to witness in real time that the exchange yeah well it's uh it's great to have you here and uh thank you for being our guest i assume that you're not uh on any shows or anything like that no i i think uh hopefully for maybe in february i'll be on the hero show as part of jfl oh cool yeah um that'll be at the china cloud theater uh every once in a while i might get uh swindled into playing piano for the odd sunday service show but you also have albums that you've done right you've uh yeah that that music project revered is there's some stuff out there you can go to emmett hall music.ca you can hear

a bunch of the um the game music video game music i've done i've done a lot for don't starve and hot lava and grift lands and there's a whole bunch of stuff in development coming out and i've scored a lot of the um animated shorts and trailers so that's kind of cool to check that out yeah you've got a lot going on this is great oh yeah it's uh it's quite the um what's your favorite piano key piano key i gotta say g oh yeah i got a g i just just that's just the one key really yeah yeah uh oh the piano note yeah that one that yes um so yeah that's kind of i'm getting a lot of creative um fulfillment there but you know i still got to make an ass of myself at some point yeah

absolutely don't yeah don't deny yourself the pleasure of making it yeah no social media i don't know i gotta thank uh my lovely girlfriend for giving me a decent overheard because a vape and a tesla together that's not much to go off of well still pretty good if uh can i wear this chris delia shirt or is it no too hot to wear too controversial what if i cross it out what if i do a big cross i've been saying chris delia but i guess that's wrong i don't know i just know that he's cool. That's all. I don't think he is. I don't remember exactly what's uncool about him, but I remember he's not. I think he's a bad man.

The internet forgets all. We are in Edmonton in January. Is that right? That can't be right. For winterruption. Yeah. So go to Edmonton. Yeah.

Get on a computer in the Edmonton Public Library. Look for our tickets. They've got to be on. You can buy tickets for the whole festival, or you can buy tickets just for us at winterruption.something. .something slash. It is winterruptionieg.com. There we go.

You can find tickets for that. There's really, I mean, you get a ticket for our show. It's like an intimate night with us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going to do all covers, putting down our electrics and picking up the acoustics, and it's going to be pretty cool. Yeah, it's going nasty it's going to be this nasty show and you'll love it uh if you're in edmonton in january this will be fun for you i think i'm gonna gift this shirt to

kevin banner i think that would be a fun be a fun transaction okay what am i supposed to do with it i don't know give it to my house give it away to your damn weirdos who come to your show um all right well i guess we are merry gentlemen yeah just let just let him finish the show amit that is the end that is the end bye everybody come back back next week for another episode of stuff podcast yourself emmett hit it MaximumFun.org Comedy and culture. Artist owned.

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