Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 743 - Tim Gray

Episode Date: June 14, 2022

Comedian Tim Gray returns to talk bosses, The Big Chill, and one weird garage sale.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 743 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who just taught me a little bit about giving head on beer, Mr. Dave Shumka. When there's a, okay, no. Let me get out of this.

When you're pouring a beer and there's a lot of head i heard like foam foam on the top uh we're just giving head on beer yeah on beer oh man i was i was on beer last night you'll have to forgive me i want beer uh the the you know you if you i've heard this i'm sure in another podcast because it's you know what i love the medium and i uh yeah you uh the foamier like if you pour it badly and you end up with a bunch of foam on top then you end up with less burps is there a way to remember that with like a mnemonic? A little rhyme or something like that? Head on your beer. Have no fear.

Have no fear. Of burps. Head no more. Burps galore. There you go. We got it. Our guest today, returning guests here to the podcast he'll be headlining rumors comedy club in winnipeg one night only august 21st uh his his sketch troupe uh hunks is uh going to be

playing at the winnipeg fringe festival and they're going to be at the grindstone comedy festival uh that's all coming up soon from our guest today tim gray sorry if i sound weird i'm on coca-cola right now this i thought we told you this is a straight edge podcast that is what so you should hold up your glass it's like a pint glass full of Coca-Cola. Well, to be honest with you, there's some whiskey in it. Okay. But still, that's a lot of Coca-Cola. It's a full can.

Okay. I thought maybe you had a two liter bottle. Or your own Coke machine. Yeah, the can is five gallons. When's the last time you bought a two liter of pop? It's been a while. I don't know if I ever have. Ever?

College? Yeah, college seems like a good time to be exploring different sodas. Yeah, you're experimenting with purchases. I'm on Dr. Pepper. I didn't like the way that felt. There was a, there's an amateur standup comedy contest is happening right now in

Winnipeg at the, at the club and annual event. And there was a comedian who went up yesterday with a two liter of Dr. Pepper in a plastic bag, never addressed it. And then just left it on stage. pepper in a plastic bag, never addressed it, and then just left it on stage. That's how you do it. That's how you do open mic.

That's how you do it. Yeah. Yeah. Leave a lasting legacy. I remember I was on the ferry once and in the, on the, there's like a place you can buy food. There's like a little cafeteria, uh, but you can also bring on your own food and just eat wherever

and i saw this family eating like you know they'd brought in you know sandwiches or whatever and they were all sharing this two liter of uh diet root beer and i was like no one wants diet root beer it was like this was i was just thinking like they chose this based on, well, she can't have caffeine and she only wants a diet thing. But then this guy's like, it must be Brown. Dad loves beer.

I told you about, I know on the podcast before I talked about this woman, but I used to go to a diner and this woman would sometimes show up and she would get, uh, the waitress would prepare her three cans of diet coke which she would eat or sorry drink right in a row and that just start belching really she'd yeah and then she put money on the counter and walked away and that was more than once that was her her thing oh my god drinking three cans of diet coke and then perfect

like you can save money by just buying your own like buying a six-pack oh she likes the atmosphere though yeah i want to ruin an atmosphere do we want to get to know us yes uh tim thank you oh sorry case there's an echo here in case you needed that drop um tim it's let's say it's been about a year since we were able to chat i think so and how's it been how's this year tell us all about it oh it's been devastating um devastatingly great oh nice i won the lottery twice oh cool how much you win 10 bucks nice that's not bad do you play uh scratchers sometimes yeah do you play the big lottery uh yeah sometimes sometimes i do i'm a gambling man if it's sometimes what is when will you do

is it just when you get a flight of fancy Or you see an ad and you're like oh 70 million That could really change things Yeah that's it's more the I think it's more the 70 million But I'm lazy about it It's like if a bunch of chatter Around work or what not is

Well if you don't see me on Monday You know I won the lottery Or I'm dead. Or the demons got me. Dave, do you ever play Lotto? Nah, not in a long time. It is a real, I do feel like it is, when I worked in an office i played it a lot like it was office pools not office pools but just like oh people were talking about it oh yeah i feel like a real i feel like a real idiot if i didn't win the lottery this weekend

and putting it off and putting it off if you're ever waiting in line behind somebody that's checking a bunch of lottery tickets i like that the machine makes a noise every time that it's a winner there should be one every time they lose too um that's a revelation on your wins yeah yeah i cut i like it's been a long time since i bought a lottery ticket um and because i just i'm going to convenience stores as much anymore but uh there was chatter about the 70 million dollar pot so i like bought one and then i won a free play for the next draw and then on that one i won ten dollars so i'm like well i'll just put that back into another ten10 lottery ticket and then i want another free play so i had like four four weeks in a row of uh chasing that uh dragon trying to get that monkey off your back so if it's 70 million the first week is it 70 million the second week or it goes down

i thought it goes up every time somebody wins it's supposed to it goes down but if nobody wins it's supposed to go up but it was like it never changed here's a here's a theory or a question has anybody ever won the lotto like has are these pictures of people winning fake are the stories fake and it's just all money that's going into the government like do you know anybody personally that has won the lotto yeah i do oh okay well that blows my conspiracy theory right out of the water. But it could be like one in a hundred lottery winners are real. How much did this person win?

Well, their family, his aunt, this guy that I grew up with, his aunt won like $10 million or something like that. So you don't know. So you said you knew someone, but you don't. You know someone's aunt. You don't, but you know someone who said that their aunt. I didn't shake her hand and say congratulations. No. Yeah.

But I watched his life change. Oh, yeah? What happened? Well, I borrowed money off him every day. Every single day, I would ask for a toonie from him so I could buy a hot dog at lunch. But that, I mean, look, if I win $10 million, I hate to break it to my nephews. You're not getting richer. I'll buy you a hot dog, but that's it.

I don't trust you with the money. They bought like this big farm estate for the whole family. And they had all these like toys, you know, ATVs, snowmobiles, and stuff like that. Everyone in the family got a new truck and stuff like that. Did she end up blowing the money? Because I feel like that's a big ongoing thing. Yeah, what did she end up blowing? Yeah.

Back to the head talk, huh? No, I think, i don't know i i uh i think it was i think she invested in property i i haven't kept touch in touch with them next time you see him though get on by your hot dog right i absolutely will graham if you win 10 million million, how much longer do you do this podcast? Well, I'll be on a rocket to the moon, so we can do it remotely from the rocket, if you like. I think that $10 million is enough to afford a whole rocket. Maybe some old one that blew apart or something. Yeah, I got $10 million, and I'm like Bezos. I'd have to get a a fixer upper rocket.

It's like, this is a good project for somebody who likes to tinker. Oh, didn't the Connors win the lottery? Oh, yeah. They did, but then it was one of those, spoiler alert, it was all a dream things. Because Roseanne woke up and Dan was actually dead. So she had made this whole fake world in her brain that was alive and they won the lottery and everything was great

yeah it was a very weird year of that show is that is it was that the original or is that the the reboot the original the prequel to the conners yeah so i guess the new series happens in the madness of the multiverse or whatever of roseanne the roseanne it's the television universe which also the social is a part of you know what's the one with the daughter on it oh oh the talk the talk yeah that's part of the Roseanne universe as well. Yeah, so is Scrubs. I mean, yeah, it already had two Beckys. That's right. In the other alternate universe, there's six Beckys.

None the richer. so uh what else you've been up to have you been uh you've been traveling a lot or because it's all everything's kind of opened up in a in a way um yeah were you back to stuff that you missed or are you back to stuff that you hate or well i uh i i got a job job like a day job um doing like a handyman work for this apartment building in downtown winnipeg okay so i i went from and this is back in december uh i like i got the job and then i flew to uh vancouver to participate in your 24 hours of let's drive graham crazy yes oh yeah uh with jokes and then uh came back and thought i had covid for sure and then like the people that i was staying with they all got covid shortly after i left but uh it turns out i didn't but i got an extra week off this new job that i just started so that was nice nice um but yeah i went from like you know two years of on purpose

not meeting anybody new to like starting a whole new job in this new work environment and uh uh and yeah it was i'm still finding it like socially challenging but yeah but it's nice talking to completely new people completely different people and do what are you doing what's your what's your most often call you out like in my place it's probably the sink the sink always doing something weird here yeah eight times out of the ten someone took a dump in the sink you're telling me brother that's always doing that's always happening in my apartment. We haven't pinpointed it, but... When I was in my early 20s, I remember scraping food off a dish into the toilet because I thought it was cleaner.

And it backed up so badly. The landlord came to fix it. He was like, what have you been eating? I was like, oh, I don't know. All food goes right through me all food there's a bone in here that must have hurt eh i feel like a toilet could take pretty much anything so i'm surprised yeah you know what i've punished a few toilets they like it

yeah some of them want to use you it's some of them want to be used by you but you're like you're an all-around handyman you can do a little bit of everything yeah all around any man like a little bit of electrical, mostly plumbing stuff. And then like countertops, closets, a little bit of window repair. What have you done on a countertop? Replaced it. Whoa. With what?

A different countertop? No, just a tablecloth. This is your countertop. You're going to like it. I took a few liberties i actually put the window on the counter um you you like fixed up your house you have a house and uh you did all the fixing up yes sir yeah yeah we we bought a a house in 2019 in winnipeg because you can do that here i am surprised more vancouver rights haven't just bought property in winnipeg to finance their property in vancouver but uh

interesting yeah it's it was relatively affordable here only cost 10 bucks no but you gave it you bought that extra lottery ticket yeah i could have two houses oh shit but yeah it's a beautiful house and like you did all that you built the kitchen and yeah but put in the all new kitchen flooring the tile got a couple floating shelves people love that yeah we built the built a coffee table built a big seven foot mirror with an arch top where my design freaks at that was all dana and we just finished the basement we put a bathroom down there we got carpeting we got a bedroom we got somebody living with us now we got a renter in the basement oh nice yeah um and

they like having a bathroom they love it yeah they can't get it off of it renters love to go to the bathroom they're always using the toilet that's the first thing i scan for if you look at a craigslist ad bathroom it has well it doesn't have a bath because a lot of places in cooper actually don't have bathrooms communal bathrooms or you know what is a basement suite uh cost people in winnipeg well this this is like a friend of ours so we're giving a pretty good deal it's like 300 but i would that is fucking crazy yeah yeah we're kind of losing money on it but um no well but like in the hundred for wow

yeah 500 for a whole basement to yourself? Yeah, that's pretty good. That is pretty good. But then you're in Winnipeg is the thing. Yeah, you're in. And you're underground. It's been crazy here the last few days. I don't know if you have this out here,

but all the poplar trees are shooting their seed all over the city. Oh, yeah. What happens with that? So it's like it's Christmas again. Like it's as thick in the air with white fluffy stuff as if we're in the middle of like a snowstorm yeah summertime we've we've we got a bit of that but i've been in places where there's a ton of it and letters like uh builds up on the ground yeah and what do you call that in the old west uh oh tumbleweeds yeah there's

like tumbleweed yeah yeah totally santa claus with the spurs comes from the corner there was a there was a place that i went to see when i was trying to find an apartment and it was two apartments that shared a bathroom oh my god two complete apartments and then there was a shared bathroom in between them so was it like a double wide toilet yeah we we can shit arm and arm oh where did you where did you learn how to do all this stuff shit

yeah where did you learn I'm in the market for some lessons I guess you could say I'm a natural I studied under Sir Shits a lot okay I studied under Sir Schitt's a lot. Okay. Yeah. My dad was in the construction industry and I just kind of grew up in it, always doing stuff,

worked on framing houses in high school and whatnot and then just kept doing that. Actually, at a university, there was a bunch of comedians that got a job with this property management company in Winnipeg because the head boss, he wanted to be a comedian.

He came to an open mic once and then he hired four of us and three of us were landscapers and I was a maintenance guy because I had a little bit of experience with tools. I got to learn some stuff out of that but a lot of it was honestly like if the boss was having a bad day we would

just get in his truck go for breakfast and just try to cheer him up it's the worst it was like the worst job um in terms of learning anything about anything yeah getting a job or whatever but It was like the worst job in terms of learning anything about. Anything. Yeah. Getting a job or whatever. It's just like, oh, Chris is sad today. Let's put on our comedy faces.

Aw. Yeah. Do you think you could ever be a boss, either of you? No. I was a boss for a bit how was it a girl boss boss baby hashtag yeah i was a boss of a bunch of babies it sucks it sucks it sucks to like manage people in a in a job because like immediately people are always lying or manipulating you or whatever. At first, I took it personally.

Why would you lie to me? I don't think you're actually sick today. I think it was the weekend and you just went too hard. But then you just got to realize, fuck this company. Everything's doing fine.

I have kids and I feel like that's the closest I am to a boss where I'm like, okay, I'm in charge of you and you are sad and you're also manipulating me in a way and I can tell you're planting seeds to try to be sick tomorrow

for school what do they do what what are their methods yeah oh like oh i got a bit of a sore throat all right well you know what go to bed early like that's my counter move yeah you need a lot of rest sounds like you need a lot of rest that's like judo just using their own weight against them that's so smart I love that you should do like an annual review with your kids

no sure about their performance goals what's your 5 year plan? I don't know to be to be 10 yeah i've never wanted to be a boss and i think the people who want to be in charge of people are weird yeah yeah because there's two different styles there's the style that's like just try to control people with intimidation or um coercion you know right or there's the ones that's just like hey i'm gonna be cool and work harder than anyone and you just follow along yeah i've had that boss before and i don't mind him i didn't mind him he was he was hard tough affair i'd say that's the better of the two yeah because a lot

of really insecure people who are bosses who are just like just want to go on a power trip make you feel bad yeah it is weird when you're like your boss is staying late and you're like well i'm leaving up my uh allotted time that we all agreed on yeah i feel a little guilty about it but yeah yeah yeah i'm not gonna not gonna not go yeah exactly that's what I like about the job I have now is like the second our time's up we're out of there no matter what if there's like a half the buildings

on fire we're just see ya yeah I do know that like when the boss yeah staying late that is a funny it's a funny maneuver it's supposed to like you say it's supposed to make you guilty but to what end you know yeah i really care about my boss's feelings also is there like their secretary day which is very suspect as a holiday yeah um but is there boss day

there's talk like a pirate day is that the same thing um i know nothing i guess we work on a ship maybe it is oh yeah that's the real place that you don't want to be a boss is on a ship because that's the one place where people can mutiny. Yeah. And then you're fucked if your employees all join together and overthrow you. Can you imagine that like a Staples? Boss day is on October 16th. Everybody, you still got.

Yeah, there's lots of time to pick out your boss a nice present yeah yeah it's gonna be a mug it'll be a mug yeah and it says world's worst boss but it's got like it's got candy in it so it's a fun yeah

it's like a silly joke there should be like some world's worst mom mugs right shouldn't't oh yeah yeah i feel like i've been to a funny cafe where all the dishes don't match and i feel like i've gotten like world's worst teacher i uh remind everyone i have a mug here that graham gave me for christmas one year of the rapper shabba ranks and. Apparently he put out a song called Best Baby Father. He's hinting around Father's Day. Do you like my new single?

Graham, I know you're a bit of a purveyor of reality TV shows. Sometimes, yeah. Yeah, you love to purvey that stuff. Yeah, I thought you were going to say you're a known pervert, so I'm glad it went in this direction instead. You're a perv. Hey, you're a big perv here. Have you ever seen the show Below Deck?

Oh, yeah, I think I've seen seen an episode it's about the crew of a yacht right yeah there's tons of seasons of this show it's incredible there's like 11 seasons and a bunch of spinoffs uh dana and jackie our new roommate they've been just burning through them because uh it's good garbage tv but it's that yeah it's that idea where it's like all these people have to work together and also live together and sleep in like the smallest of quarters while dealing with like really wealthy people with high demands and also being filmed 24 hours a day yeah it's like that's a nightmare for me i don't like boats uh because you can't escape and but like that is that is the ultimate in like trying to leave leave your job at the

appointed time and you're like oh wait no sharks well i'll see you tomorrow imagine it yeah try to leave your work and then you have to deal with sharks that wouldn't that wouldn't be nice that would be nice at all better than drive time traffic am i right oh yeah well at least i get to listen to drive time radio this is the shark let's get you the shark in the afternoon um do you you watch uh selling sunset that's that's the one show that i've really taken a shine to yeah yeah yeah we watched a a bunch of them it's so funny did you see the pictures that somebody posted on twitter of um

the the one of the one of the bosses one of the twin bosses it was like a it was all these photographs of the boss pretending to be on the and i think other people that work they're pretending to be on the phone and like closing a deal and then it's a screenshot and then if you look at the phone it's like on camera or home screen or like it's not on the phone phone you know it's like yeah it's these two tiny guys both uh both shaved heads they also seem to be the only people in the office that do any work because they have it there at least they're facing their computer sure yeah all the. All the gals in the office, they just gab all day. Just have a lifestyle, yeah.

And then, yeah, once in a while, they'll be showing a property, and they'll just say some random person lives next door. They're like, oh, Flea lives next door. Oh, okay. They like to live on the same block as Flea? That would be cool if when you, because you never know anything about your neighbors when you're getting a new place.

But at least if your neighbors are famous, you can be like, huh, well, there might be a little slap bass happening from time to time. But I bet he also has a studio he goes to to practice. Yeah, exactly. Open air bass playing, though? Maybe.

Yeah, well, you know what? He might be naked with a sock on around his pool. Yeah, maybe he's having like a bass on barbecue, having folks over. BYOB, a bunch of bass players. Bring your own bass. Oh, well, maybe I could talk to him about how he played on you ought to know the trivia some trivia i know about him i'll mention it at the next block party

yeah you have him sign your trivia pursuit cards that mention him but yeah that show is like i can't i can't even keep track of what character is which they just yeah it's on netflix it's on netflix yeah and if you just really need to like be stupid for an hour then that's the show if you're just like calming your brain yeah that shows it because it's there's just nothing there's no stakes no there's no none they create all their own drama yeah it's like ridiculous houses that they uiod drama absolutely but like everything in the show is branded by the real estate company so if they're drinking out of a mug it has their logo on it out of a mug, it has their logo on it. Or they're drinking

wine that has their logo on it. The Oppenheimer Group. And it's not much of a logo, if you ask me. It sounds like an elevator company, doesn't it? Yeah. When it comes to elevators, I'm Otis all the way. And escalators? I like Schindler.

This season, I'm going with Schindler. Schindler's lifts. That's pretty good. Sorry, I was drinking a drink. I couldn't laugh right away. We'll put that in your post, I'm sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ha ha ha.

We just get that clean? Ha ha. Nice. Yeah, you can triple that oh yeah yeah do haha well you know we'll just just say hi we'll get it i'm killing do you think like how many uh movies still do foley and stuff like that or is there enough sound effects that exist? You never have to do Foley. You know what I mean? Oh yeah, right, right.

They just license it out? They just have that? Yeah, they just have that sound effect. When I worked at CBC, I got a tour of the building and they still had a Foley studio. Really? In there. And it was Dave. It was like it was dave foley uh it was there were like i it was there it wasn't in use anymore but you can see where

stuff used to be and they had like trap doors that's like because they had like not like not trap doors where you'd fall in but like you open up the floor and then there's like sand that you can step in oh and then another place very cool where you can step in i don't know what else people walk in so gravel glass yeah glass yeah um water yeah i wonder because it seems like it would have been the most fun job in the world yeah it lasted you know um we uh on the on the hunk sketch album we had somebody uh abby falvo here who did a she did a fringe show that was a radio play version of um what's that arnold schwarzenegger yeah commando yeah yeah and abby had this huge table full of uh stuff to do with the live sound effects for the movie. And so we had,

yeah, it was fun to watch her work. Yeah. I re-saw that. Yeah. And then, so she, for a sketch on the album where it's all in pitch black and,

and it's like a surprise party and I'm trying to hide, but I keep like falling downstairs or falling in a box of Christmas ornaments or like getting my penis caught in a m of christmas ornaments or like getting my penis caught in a mouse trap or whatever uh what a day abby did all the live sound effects for it it was great that's great um yeah it's just one of those like because when you said elevators i was thinking about like an elevator guy that used to just press the floor and oh operator yeah right yeah yeah to do a dial or that man that like i wonder when elevator operators if they ever saw the writing on the wall and they were like oh don't don't let the people know how easy this is yeah i'm studying

to become an escalator attendant at night it's really it's truly like what vanna white does yeah yeah yeah a letter to her vanna white stumbled into the perfect job well that's the thing she didn't stumble the poise this woman has she doesn't have poise remarkable remarkable hasn't fallen once i bet she has i would love to see vanna white bloopers i would like yes oh man she gets her hand like cut off because it gets caught in the letter turd mega blooper um at the end of wheel of fortune because it's always on like right before jeopardy yes they stand there and have to try and make chit chat. And they've been together for like 90 years or whatever.

Yeah. So like he was, Dave told me and I didn't believe him that Pat Sajak was in Vietnam. What? I told you that? Yeah, you told me that and I didn't believe it. But yeah. The war? Yeah.

Wow. He was in the Vietnam War. No, the sub. The submarine sandwich he was in that yeah like that's how old he is wow and just like they they chit chat to fill out i don't know why and then they they have a different state or something that they're doing every episode. You watch it or you record Jeopardy? I record Jeopardy and it comes on.

Catches the last bit of it. Yeah. Yeah. And Vanna White's daughter or Pat Sajak's daughter is on it now. No way. As what? I don't know, actually. I just know that she's at the end saying what the website is. Oh.

Maybe that's all she does. We got a website now. The youngest person who watches this show might be able to go to the website. Geocities.com slash Wheel of Fortune. It's Wheel, but without the H h because we couldn't get wheel of fortune i'm even noticing that the if you win on jeopardy lately you you you're guaranteed you win like 20 times yeah yeah it seems like people have really figured jeopardy out yeah yeah like crack the code yeah because it seems to me there's this similar method happening uh but i'm so far behind i'm

still in like the new year's day episode so i'm so so far behind you know what you can do is uh i won't but you'll never catch up no well maybe you have to watch at least two a day to catch up two a day yeah i feel. Two a day? Yeah. I feel like I can do that. You haven't been. No, that's true. I haven't been. Yeah, of course you could.

You could do 12 a day. I mean, 48 a day. When you watch Jeopardy, do you have to be fully locked in on it? Or is it something you can put on while you're making dinner? Yeah, there's not a lot to look at sure yeah there are there's word big words on blue screens there's it's like one of the most watchable like you have to watch shows yeah and then like you have to pay attention to what category they're they chose because then you because then you're like, you're like, what,

why are they talking about Napoleon? This is about the, you know, the world series. Yeah. I, uh, routinely will hear all the categories and then see the first person give an

answer and be like, what the hell is this? I don't remember what category this is. I, yeah, I, I'm still looking at my phone when they go, when they go through the categories. I don't have to pay

attention to this stuff. When giving head. And go on. What's the rest of the answer? Yeah, what's the rest of the answer, Tim? Yeah, come on, Tim Bialik. What is burpees? Burpees.

Is there an official host yet or is it still flip-floppy between it's still flip-floppy but come on it's gotta be ken you gotta you know give it the ken um he's a nice guy i met him once a long time ago i feel like uh you guys maybe have talked about this before but have you ever tried to uh on that show, like forcibly? Forcibly, yeah. I crashed the set. Yeah, stormed the studio. I hijacked a bus that Alex Trebek was on. This is my January 6th.

I took the test like a few years years ago and then oh yeah but then i was like i'm on their mailing list or i thought i was like i was like oh yeah i'll take the test every time that they offer it but then i never did again so i don't know if i'm not on their mailing list like did you find out your score or did you just hand it in and never know How well you did? No you just do it online so I don't know Oh yeah I think I tried it online once And I think maybe I got one right

You know Which is not great I'll admit But you have to type everything Which is harder than just saying the thing What's your Worst category? Like in general, when you watch it, is there something that...

Because there's always something like U.S. history or the Bible that is like... Right. Yeah, U.S. history, the Bible, and classical music, and geography, all sorts. Yeah. Any kind of geography.

Yeah. I like geography, but i only know the u.s history that's like pop culture yeah yeah yeah what song of alanis morissette did flea play bass on oh uh you i don't know also dave navarro and benmont tench you needed to phrase that as a question so who is benmont we already asked you to leave dave yeah but you didn't frame it as a question what is put your shirt back on i may not have framed it as a question, but I went up at the end.

Can you just do that? Can you just be like, George Washington? You didn't frame it as a question. Yeah, but you knew I was asking. George Washington, right? Yeah, there was an episode recently where because all the the winner recently you mean january january let's say january 6th first of all the one thing i do is now i pay attention to because it's broadcast from victoria bc which is a very like senior type of city that's where the it's not broadcast from there it's broadcast from victoria bc which is a very like senior type of city that's where the

it's not broadcast from there it's like yeah they're affiliate yeah yeah and uh the ads on there are all uh homemade ads except if it's like a big product but it's all you know this security company or this uh sofa company love it i of them. It's all bath fitter. But there was at the end of an episode the woman had so smoked the competition like one person had 500 and the other one had 1000 and they said

wow UK you're really in the lead and you guys made it to Final Jeopardy. you guys don't owe us money at the end yeah you have to write them a check if you were in the in the red has anyone like been bankrupt from going on jeopardy or you get to clean dishes in the back jeffy stay late the boss is like well i'm staying late so you are too you know who i hope ends up hosting it is that producer who they said was going to take over and then it was immediately canceled and nobody liked in the first place I was so happy

you gotta shoot your shot right you're in charge of hiring the replacement you wanna be the replacement yeah yeah yeah you staged a coup and everyone was like but don't you suck didn't he get cancelled for shooting his shot

yeah nice good one you're fired I hurt my back do you guys do you watch it every day do you wait do you watch it every day and do you do wordle two pronged question

I never watched deputy never I've done wordle once and it was so depressing that i couldn't go back to it dana does that quartal thing where she's doing four words at a time what dana's my wife that's a freak show yeah that's sick right you guys do or wordle no do you dabble with wordle i don't know i don't uh i should though i think they say it's like helpful for your uh brain memory or whatever yeah because i feel like i don't do anything nice for my brain it's always selling sunset or some shit you know i do four of them i do four things every day i don't do quartal but i do wordle okay i do hurdle hurdle what's hurdle it's name that tune okay fun uh i do

no it's the hockey one the hockey one's like i don't know plurtle or something like that it's about hockey players is it gila flirtle all right fertile sean burdle um the uh i do uh the box office game what's the box where you you just uh you they give you the weekend and you uh try to guess the top five movies from that's fine april 7th 1995 neat oh like going yeah going back that's cool yeah yeah and i do uh i've started doing framed where you yeah they give you six movie frames and you try to get it if you don't know it on the first one like oh yeah interesting you you get the next frame and then these are all uh these are on your telephone yeah these are all on the telephone. One of them's on my fridge.

You also do crosswords. I know that. I haven't done crosswords in a while. I need to get back on that because I still pay for it. Yeah, it's always a surprise at the end of the month when it's like, your subscription to

The New Yorker? What the hell? What the hell? What the hell? Pornhub? I haven't watched Jeopardy in many years because it coincides with my children's bedtimes. But I've started back up and maybe watched a couple times a week. It was very exciting when that canadian woman was

was it was she from winnipeg i thought she was from halifax oh okay there was a woman from winnipeg who went on a bit of a run recently i think maybe she's from winnipeg chattering about in the news lately i feel bad for anybody who goes on a long run and still has to come up with anecdotes yeah yeah yeah i got diarrhea from my hotel food this show is graham our show is just like what if the the anecdote part of jeopardy was 90 minutes long but i just like to rank i like ranking the three stories from the first to third and but do you graham are you worried that now that if you're watching episodes that are six months old yeah that the questions will be out of date like it'll be oh my knowledge of this subject is about it's from 2022 and these people are still

yeah from last year yeah doing topics this year is the topic yeah sometimes they do a really easy question and then they put a picture of the person as well just to make it like one step easier the jeopardy clue crew in a while are they still going at it they probably got hosted whenever Alex passed he was the only one keeping you here by the way good the clue crew were

is that like the Red Bull girls yeah the Red Bull girls they pour shots they pour shots they have they were whatever short shorts trivia? They pour shots. They have, you know, they were whatever short shorts and have a weird

like backpack full of booze that they spray at everyone. I imagine, I don't know, by the way, I don't know what Red Bull girls are, but. Seems about right. Yeah, pretty close. The clue crew were two or three people who would like you know the subject would be like the national air and space museum and they would

you know you know do clues from on location oh right right and it would always make the round last too long that they would run out of time to see all the clues oh yeah yeah right hate the clue crew and then there was also the thing that they do once a while where it's news person from the affiliate says a clue oh yeah you know it's like uh this is brian whatever from cfcn uh dayton ohio why do they have canadian call letters um yeah imagine the budget to send those people out to like to not to nasa or nasa wherever you're that's where you're from it's fast and possible. Send them up for like a 30 second question. Fly this crew and a camera crew.

Put them up for a night. Yeah. I know like Alex Durek really liked going out there and wearing an all khaki outfit. He would go out. Yeah. He also wore a lot of like bracelets. Yeah. He wore a lot of bracelets.

No way. Really? Yeah. Yeah. I saw a guy last night at the grocery store. I don't know what this is, but I think it's probably something to do with a natural way to help arthritis or something. But he had giant rings all up

and down, like a senior citizen that had these cuffs that looked like something Thor would wear. Huh. Wow. Was he opening a time portal or anything like that? senior citizen but had these like cuffs that looked like something thor would wear huh yeah wow i was opening like a time portal or anything like that or i'll tell you what he was doing he was standing there while his wife unloaded the basket and the cashier filled up the bags and he just stood there so maybe he's the opposite of thor was he riding a cock to banbury cross what's that this is that the woman with rings on her fingers and rings on

her toes his arms are just so tired from holding all those rings he can't lift them i can't get them off tim do you wear any jewelry oh wait oh i know this i know the answer to this when you got married you had a you got the wedding ring that was made out of something on uh something that like if it if you if it gets damaged and your it pinches your finger then pliers can't yeah yeah made out of tungsten carbide is the name of the of the uh alloy or whatever the metal and it's what they put on the tip of like drills when they're uh going into the earth and stuff like that holy shit um super super strong super tough metal it's also i don't know if you remember the the i always remember it from um uh the monty hall uh flying circus sketch in like their first season monty python

did i what did i say monty hall he's a winnipegger we were talking about game shows yeah let's make a deal monty python's flying circus there's that sketch called the northern playwright where it was like uh i think it was eric idol like came home and uh talking about working in the in the uh coal mines and his parents are playwrights they're so disappointed their son is working in a coal mine and they're like it's good honest work we've been to three luncheons today alone what are you doing toiling up there in the mines tungsten carbide what the bloody hell is tungsten carbide that's what i always think of but yeah the photographer at my at the at the wedding told me like oh by the way yeah that ring if you're ever in an accident they can't cut it off you're gonna lose your finger yeah they cut off your finger easier than the ring and then i talked

to somebody at a hospital they're like no no we have a special cutter for that right yeah you'll think yeah uh huh so why were you at a hospital browsing i wonder during like surgery what's the funnest tool to use in his um what bone saw yeah i was gonna say bone saw but is that a surgery tool or is that just something from i think it's a professional wrestler isn't it or is it something from like like a slaughterhouse yeah that's true like a cleaver you would bring cleaver into the operating room or machete whoopee cushion yeah they must have some kind of bone saw for like swinging open them ribs yeah yeah for sure yeah they must think they have something that's called the spreader where you put in the metal and it opens up the yeah the rib cage did you ever see

that show on tlc back in the early days of reality television that was like surgeries well it was before reality television back when tlc was about was the learning channel and they would just show surge i literally could not i i if you tell you tell me it was a show i don't know if it was on for if it was a half hour show or if it was a four hour show i if it was on i was like not going half hour show or if it was a four hour show if it was on I was like not going back to that channel for a long time you scroll past it it was like all this blood squirting everywhere

the Foley artist recreating it with an actual corpse just with a bunch of melons that would be a fun day on set smashing melons i uh i think there was one like behind the scenes of a foley artist and they took a wet rag and slapped

it at a car seat that was supposed to be the sound of a punch oh nice there's a good did you ever see the human giant sketch that was like worked the opposite way they were like a show about someone like cutting up celery and broke a guy's arm to get the sound of celery well what's going on with you dave oh me uh oh god so last week i talked about how i watched six movies um but uh i was wrong i i forgot that i also watched a seventh movie because i watched it over a series of days. I watched King Richard. Oh. The precursor to The Slap. Mm.

Will Smith is Mr. Williams. Oh, right. And he's the father of? Of Venus and Serena Williams. Yes. I still want to see that movie. It's a good. I heard it's good.

I saw people watching it on a plane and I was like, oh, I should have watched this on the plane. This is a perfect plane movie. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, it's good. It always makes, whenever there's like sports in a movie. Yeah. It makes me think of like the actors who have to play like real life professional athletes.

Yeah. Yeah. But they, but they, and, and so like. They have to get as good as they possibly can at that sport. Or do they just hire people who. Right. Yeah. People who play the sport really well.

Right. Like the kids playing tennis, the actresses are, are good, but then they have to put like, there's a woman they play against, like they play against professional famous tennis players from 20 years ago. Oh, like Arantxa Sanchez Vicario.

Oh, but so they had to get an actress to play her and she doesn't have any lines. So she's just a really good, like she's just a really good tennis player who gets to be in a movie and gets to like okay you have to pretend you're really angry right now i imagine working with like just an athlete is like working with a dog okay show them something that makes them angry yeah put peanut butter on the roof of their mouth yes take away their toy

yeah um apparently in the movie cable guy jimmy carrey was so bad at basketball that they had to rethink the entire scene to cut around how bad he was no way it's like only for one scene so why would you learn how to play basketball for sure they said it was on unbelievable how bad he was he kept trying to dribble with his butt yeah that's encouraging yeah like that people like i'm not any good at basketball but i could dribble a ball you know yeah five minutes oh yeah i've traveled yeah uh so i it's encouraging to know that jim carrey never got to do that yeah the fundamentals there's a real art to people playing the piano when they're not they are just pretending to play some people are very good at it and some people just seems like their hands are plumped down and they're just going like side to side

yeah yeah yeah flatting it around do you uh uh when you're on a plane do you always watch a movie or do you uh ever try tv shows or anything like that and also do you find you cry a lot watching movies on a plane i've heard that's a thing yeah but uh i don't think i've ever watched something on a plane that's worth crying over so do you cry tim tim oh yeah yeah it's like like what the flight from winnipeg to vancouver is almost like the perfect movie time, I think. Or movie plus a little bit. What would you cry at? What did you cry at in the past?

Oh, like anything. I think. Oh, yeah. Give it to me. I'll cry. I cry so hard. You know what will make you cry? King Richard.

Oh, yeah. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah. Emotional biopic. I can't think of when it would be cry-ish. Why is the story rotate around him and not the kids that are there?

Yeah, that is... That was their wish, wasn't it? I don't know. It's because Will Smith wanted to win an Oscar. Yeah, yeah. Well, he should have played both of the daughters. He definitely would have won. But, yeah, it's directed by tyler perry i definitely would want to see a movie about them it's really more

about like serena's barely in it oh really he's like you know he tells her at one point like you're gonna be even better than venus which is like okay fine yeah she is yeah yeah there must be some good 30 for 30s like sports document document here you know sports docs say documentary yeah you say it i don't want to um yeah there definitely are good good sports stocks um so that's uh something i did but the other thing is uh we get these channels that are that have movies from different uh eras there's like a 70s channel and 80s channel and 90s channel and a 20th century channel 21st century yeah yeah um and uh i keep recording movies and not watching them

uh but there's like so many 80s movies that i've recorded like uh last week I talked about watching Misery, which I guess is a 90s movie. But the, and so I watched this week. I was like, I got to get around to watching one of these. And so I watched a movie that was very famous, but I'd never seen. A movie that I recognize the cover of from many visits to Blockbuster. Yeah, yeah, yeah. An all-star cast, movie called the big chill the big chill have you seen this is that galifianakis in that no yeah that galifianakis it came out in 1982 a 12 year old Zach Galifianakis um sorry yeah it was

this like seminal yuppie movie right it was a seminal yuppie movie it was boomer central yeah and it introduced the world I think to Jeff Goldblum or at least he was yeah I think it maybe introduced

the world to like it's got kevin klein well and close jeff goldblum tom barringer uh mary k place who's which is the name of actress i've heard a million times and could not tell you who that was it's like a mole and also the feature film debut of ke Costner, he played their dead friend. Off screen. Yeah. Well, yeah. He was the body in the casket.

You do see them brush his hair at the very beginning, but you don't see his face. Yeah. That's Kevin Costner's hair. And he stole the scene as a dead man. So, have you seen it, Graham? Yeah. I saw it a long time ago. Because it's got like one of the best soundtracks

yeah it's all like 60s music uh these people who like grew up in the 60s and now they're yuppies and their friend is dead and they're at his funeral and they kind of hang out for a couple days at this, somebody's house. Yeah. Oh. Oh. Okay. Oh. You seem like you're looking it up on your phone. Oh, okay.

Yeah, I'm just watching it now. And it satisfies you? You're going to watch the whole thing? Yeah, just watching the whole thing. He starts crying right away. No! Costner! Guys, I got to love with you.

I've been on a plane this whole time. So, it's like a super famous movie, but I don't know if anyone likes it. Right. Like. I think my parents probably like it. Oh, of course they do. They're such boomers. Yeah, big boomers. Absolutely, yuppies.

Huge yuppies. It's kind of, so it's like, it's also like they're all like 35 in it. And this was their breakout performance, a lot of these people. So it's like the 80s, you know, a lot of like 35-year-olds just it's like the 80s you know a lot of like 35 year olds just became famous in the 80s while like they were the rat pack was becoming famous yeah so is this a is this a dave recommendation i would say yeah it's fine um okay what uh you know what so like i Um, okay. What, uh, you know what?

So like I, Kevin Klein is in it. I love, I love Kevin Klein. I love him in Dave. Yeah. I love him in A Fish Called Wanda. Yeah. Good. And those are maybe the only things I've seen him in.

He's in the Pirates of Penzance. Uh-huh. One of the, one of the pirates. Oh yeah. Yeah. What would you do for a klein movie that's the song uh and then tom berenger is in it and i i think of tom berenger as like from the moment i started watching movies he was like a washed up actor

maybe because he played a washed up baseball player in major league no yeah yeah yeah uh but he's like then then he was in like sniper yeah yeah or the substitute was he in the substitute yes he was in the substitute yeah all these like you know revenge movies or bad action movies uh and so the weirdest thing about this movie is that i knew i loved kevin klein i did not know i did not think i liked tom barringer tom barringer is so great in this movie yeah he plays like he plays like they're like they're all college friends who come back together and he's become like a tv star huh and uh there's one weird bad thing about this movie which is like time time wise or like era wise oh there's a lot of bad things about this movie sure sure sure sure like they're literally

like they're hanging out on what is essentially a plantation for a week jesus yeah yeah fingering the corpse of kevin costa yeah but the like there's oh yeah there's plenty bad about this movie but the one like plot thing that i didn't like so there's one character who's like oh i one day i want to be a mother but i don't need a dad around it and so she's like going through the friends that are there that weekend of like who she wants to impregnate her. Uh-huh. And then she, what they end up on is very weird. Like the fact that the decision to impregnate this woman has to happen over the next two days is bad and gross. And I didn't like it at all.

Is your problem with it the premarital sex is that yeah well one of them is married okay okay what is the what is the what is the phrase the big chill mean i couldn't tell you oh okay i thought it was like the big oh but maybe chill was not a word they used yeah because they wouldn't have said they probably wouldn't have said like let's chill yeah in 83 right maybe they would have maybe that's where it came from maybe that's where chill come back to my plantation and chill it's super chill it's gonna be super chill you guys. We're all here. Apparently we have to impregnate a lady. Thanks for inviting me to this weird, weird weekend. Chill, chill, chill.

Isn't there a scene in it where somebody there buys everybody running shoes and everybody's running? I think, so Kevin Kline has a business where he owns a chain of, and I think it's like a sportswear store. Right. So like a bunch of shoes are delivered for everyone. And everyone's like, these feel great. Oh, I'm going to walk around all weekend in these. And it's a little bit like jogging was just invented. Yeah, that's right.

Jogging was just hitting the scene. Yeah, what if we walked faster oh you mean like sprinting no no no no yeah back it up ease it back a little but it's very it's like mumblecore it's nothing happens the yeah there's like it's boomer mumblecore uh it's also a little bit like boomer bubblecore that should be a movie genre yeah that's a section of blockbuster feels a little bit like the boomer avengers because it's all all the all the greats are there and it's too long. No, it's a good

like, it's under two hours. Looks good. Yeah, truly that is what I will that is my greatest decider for what movie I'm going to watch. This one's an hour 40. Did you mention Jo Beth Williams?

Jo Beth Williams, whose name I forgot, but she's from Poltergeist. Oh, yeah, yeah. And The Big Chill. Yeah, I'm a big believer in the 90-minute movie. In fact, I watched one the other night that was 90 minutes, but it was so bad. But it had Daniel Craig in it in it so i was like it's

got to be somewhat good at daniel craig rachel vice and uh i can't remember her name she played the uh the woman in the king kong movie um who uh ray ray yeah Naomi Watts Naomi she's Australian oh she's Australian what um what movie was it it was called dream house huh and the I didn't read any of the like lead up to what it was about so it's it's so convoluted and Rachel Weisz are married. Is that right? That's where they met, was on this film. Oh. And Daniel Craig is quoted in an interview saying, well, the movie was bad, but at least I got to meet her. Aw. But anyways, it's kind of supposed to be a spooky movie, but it doesn't really understand what it is.

And Daniel Craig's doing the most hilarious American accent throughout. Yeah. Let's have some tea i mean coffee i'm from america who drinks tea i certainly don't no no no coffee please yeah if you want to see it's 90 it's 90 on the dot yeah if you're if you're looking for that it's it's it's make funnable it's fun to watch with somebody else but uh nice yeah i there's a great daniel craig movie or at least um i don't i don't remember if the movie's great but it's called enduring love and it's got like the coolest action scene ever uh really the opening scene of a movie of the movie like i don't really know if i like the whole movie but the first scene is daniel craig and samantha morton are having a picnic in a field and then they just look over

and there's a runaway like hot air balloon oh shit with a kid and his grandfather in it and they like like a farmer in a field and daniel craig and you know driver going by they run around to try to save these people like oh wow holy shit that's really cool yeah it's an amazing and then i think the rest of the movie is about a guy one of the guys who was involved in this rest trying to sell his hot air balloon just becomes obsessed with Daniel Craig and like, oh, so that it actually sounds perfect. Is it an hour and a half? Yeah. Let's look it up. Is it?

That's the exact kind of situation. But man, oh, man, if you can find Dreamhouse, Dreamhouse is on Netflix. Oh, you want to watch it on your own time uh it's really something else enduring love is an hour 40 i could yeah i could get down with that extra 10 minutes that's fine 10 minutes is probably credits you think that i always think that when i'm watching a movie because i'm like if i watch one in the afternoon and i'm like okay i got something to do at four o'clock oh boy this oh no oh no oh no they're gonna do two minutes of credits in this movie the uh in england i know for a while they would give you two times they would say when the

when the movie starts and then when the trailers are done those two timing a little i'm easy yeah uh graham what's going on with you? Well, you know what? We're right in the swing of garage sale season. Garage sale season has begun. Now, you talked about this a few weeks ago. Yeah, but this now we're leaning in. Okay.

Because I walked past a patio, a restaurant patio today, and I was like, oh, Graham's going to talk about patio a restaurant patio today and i was like oh graham's gonna talk about patio restaurant patio season oh my god oh yeah that's your graham's dick on patio but no it's it's it's not happening yet not yet not yet but this garage sale is one of the weirdest garage sales i've ever been to in my life and it there was a it was in the alley walked around into the alley and there were so many people there like more than ever what's that what neighborhood oh this neighborhood oh okay um vancouver had a vancouver vancouver bc yeah um the sale was so popular so many people there which i've never seen at a garage sale before yeah um and probably because you talked about it yeah that's true yeah graham got people people primed um when i walked in it was kind of a drizzly day so there were tents and the first tent had a table

of like vitamins and like essential oils and stuff like that which i was like how big of a garage was this that they had tents going out into the alley into their yard so the whole yard was the garage also had a bunch of stuff so it was weird at first because i was like yeah what who would buy this stuff at a garage sale but then i went into the backyard and that it was all stuff that had been bought in bulk that this person was getting rid of so it's like wow it was just like and things that you would uh like packages of sunscreen and uh oh like you know like wow like body lotion and uh at one point there was a garage full of diapers so i got some diapers to give it to people that have kids did you really yeah yeah yeah because and it was one of those things

at first yeah if you want this is a pile of diapers you gotta buy some you gotta you gotta that's the rule if you go back they won't be there i bet i did you get sunscreen i got sunscreen i got lotion i got uh what else did I get? Not things you would expect to get at a garage sale. Yeah, and that's the thing is at first I was like, this is very weird. But then when I saw like somebody, you know, holding something, I was like, oh, they have that. Well, I guess you could buy that at a garage sale.

And then I had a whole handful of stuff and they said, they were like, hmm, hmm, $7. handful of stuff and they said they were like hmm seven dollars i got like as much as you would get from a huge excursion to like shoppers drug mart for seven dollars so i don't know if it's somebody that works at costco or somebody that was hoarding and is getting rid of this stuff yeah someone who no longer fears the sun yeah exactly and the sun can square off face to face now yeah um stupid sunglasses i hate them so much what is the like do you ever think of like do you ever see something at a garage sale that you're like that is like a super great price for a super fancy thing but i'm not a fancy person i don't need a silver platter yes yeah exactly i don't

need silverware i don't need like a pants press yeah i don't need this chauffeur or this elevator operator yeah and you ask them if you can just buy one silver fork or is this this has to be a set hey yeah yeah because i just need to scratch my ass. You know what? Can I rent it? Let me rent it for 50 cents. Can I attach it to a wooden stick and scratch my big old ass? The one twist of this garage sale was everything was so cheap, but there was a little girl there selling lemonade and her lemonade was $3 a glass.

Whoa. And it tasted like suntan lotion lotion and you know people are giving her toonies they're giving two toonies keep the change she's getting five dollars keep the change yeah so laughing yeah absolutely she's uh she's probably like a little crime crime boss yeah exactly nobody works her corner but her yeah just to set up a drink across from the garage stole all that all that stuff very weird with uh money and my kids because i give them money they have money from the uh tooth fairy oh yeah yeah and i give them money for like doing for like you know every couple weeks i'll be like clean your room here. Here's an allowance. This is called an allowance, but yeah,

I don't earn it. Yeah. Then I just buy them everything they want. Like they have, they don't know what money is for. Like they're not worried about. Right. Having money and running out of it.

Yeah. Which I was as a kid. Do they have a piggy bank? Yeah. Yeah. But not a smashable. Oh, okay. And like, have you you ever have you ever raided it have i raided their piggy bank no like for drugs or something like that like trying to find drugs in their piggy bank or to get cash to buy drugs no my my dealer takes, you know, square. Yeah, it's got a tap.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I, yeah, no. It's like, it's also weird because I'm like, this is money. You will never, when you're a grown up, there will be no cash. Yeah, yeah. That's true. Yeah. Right.

Of course. It's on its way out. Do you guys want to move into some overheards? Okay. No! Oh, we were wrong, guys. It's not time for overheards. Oh, boy, our face is red.

It's our jumbo time. It's the jumbo time upon us. We have a jumbotron this week. And this one is for Joel. And this one is from Jeremy. and the message is going to be read by my main man graham joel my main man my bestie the only person who gets all my pop cultural references enjoy this birthday jumbotron from our favorite canadians thanks for being a solid dude and for wasting your time as a professional copywriter to workshop my Twitter jokes.

Here's to another year of friendship, Jack's Jack box nights and skin crawlingly cringe shit posts. You know what? That's that's on my, uh, to do. Uh, yeah,

that's super cringe. We love when things are cringe. Yeah. We love cringe core. Yeah. We're absolutely cringe core mumble core uh and you know boy emo core emo core apple core yeah um hardcore of course parkour anyway if you happy birthday out there if you want a jumbotron message like this one go to maximumfund.org

jumbotron and now go to the overheard part here we go hey it's john mo join me on depression mode for conversations on how mental health shapes our life this week david sedaris with stories of his late father that he's finally willing to tell. I think there's a difference between, you know, a good person and a good character. Like, he was a good character, my boyfriend Hugh. And my father was another one of those people. He was a really good character. But he wasn't a good person. Depressed Mode with Jon Moe, wherever you get your podcasts.

Hi, I'm Jesse Thorne, the founder of Maximum Fun, and I have a special announcement. I'm no longer embarrassed by my brother, my brother, and me. You know, for years, each new episode of this supposed advice show was a fresh insult, a depraved jumble of erection jokes, ghost humor, and frankly, this is for the best, very little actionable advice. But now as they enter their twilight years, I'm as surprised as anyone to admit that it's gotten kind of good. Justin, Travis, and Griffin's witticisms are more refined, like a humor column in a fancy magazine, and they hardly ever say bazinga anymore. So, after you've completely finished listening to every single one of all of our other shows, why not join the McElroy Brothers every week for My Brother, My Brother, overheard overheards where if you uh can and do and i want to and will hear over something you

know over here something fun here's something hilarious see something great send it here to the podcast we always like to start with the guest tim gray will you go absolutely literally go to you guys have a see something say something policy on this podcast yes that's right um okay so i have i have two i have a backup in case this bombs um okay but the first isn't overseen the second is a real classic overheard so what okay but you're gonna give us both even if the first one doesn't bomb uh probably yeah if that's okay what's the strategy judges just wondering just yeah and then you can

just edit this whole thing out yeah yeah we're going this the credits have already rolled my whole participation in this episode yeah and then we say that we've got the Tom Berger is here. Oh, yeah. Hey, I really liked you in the big chill.

Nothing else, really. He was good in the substitute. Anyways, go, Tim, if you will. Okay, so I don't know if you guys know this about me, but I have got a bad case of the golfies. Okay, yeah. I like to play golf fairway fever yeah yeah have you always i got a green thumb um when did you start golfing since like since i was like 19 or so oh shit early on yeah never seriously uh it's only just an excuse to walk around outdoors and crack a few cold ones you know yeah not seriously just goof golf just goof golf i'm a goof golfer

um so i uh was at a golf course on uh monday of this past week and they have these bathrooms maybe your bathrooms you talked about them earlier yeah yeah yeah have you heard about these things have you seen this have you guys you seen this uh there's a sign in the men's washroom that is uh it's a long one. It sounds like there's been some serious... Sounds like me in the men's washroom. That's a long one. Sorry, guys. I'm taking... Spoken for. Okay, I'll just...

I'll read you this sign, okay? And it's... I don't know. You don't do the blog anymore because I'd like to send this people to... I'll post it in the facebook group because it's the the amount of the amount of like different fonts and caps and stuff like that it's a real journey to read okay so it starts with in red seriously guys exclamation point oh just before you get going. Yeah. Is this, is this handwritten or printed? This is printed. This is printed on a printed and laminated and taped prominently in the center of the

mirror. Okay. So in red ink, seriously guys, exclamation point. And then parentheses, black ink, no longer in bold. Here's a harsh sign for you. Close parentheses. Please, please, please please all caps clean up after yourself four exclamation points there are cleaning products under the sink please use them we sometimes walk into this bathroom and it is beyond disgusting would you leave your

bathroom at home like some of you leave the bathroom here and then in really tiny font in the bottom corner it says it amazes me that i have to leave a sign like this kathy oh well that's not fair to kathy not at all clean up after yourselves for kathy but also like just i think just general just like basic hygiene is is fine you don't probably don't need extra cleaning products yeah just like get it in the toilet get it in the toilet that's that's all she's asking really that's kathy she hates cleaning up being poopoo who does it come on yeah well those signs are important because uh obviously somebody had a problem and so yeah and if anyone can figure out where we had an edit point good luck good luck uh it'll be like uh it'll be like your world for the day see if you could find yeah you're purple do you want to do your second one now or later not at all yeah how about i get it out of the way that's a quick one is that okay yeah so at this at this job that i have when i'm an apartment

building maintenance guy we have these walkie talkies and walkie talkies are breaker breaker exactly over those are the two bigs breaker breaker the big ones on the walkie talkies during the winter time we could hear the snow clearing crews

around downtown we were on the same channel right same channel here guys we're on the same channel here guys be respectful mostly just hear them chatting about you know just no clearing stuff uh-huh and sometimes he would just go off about things and it was in it was around the time that the you know the

freedom convoy you know that cool thing that got our freedoms back? I hadn't heard about this. No, it's great. We got our freedoms back. Oh, my God. Guys honked some horns. So I can put anything I want down the toilet now that my freedom's back. As long as you honk first. Put the vaccine down the toilet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. First stop.

Tim, breaker breaker. Yeah, these truckers were so upset because uh this this convoy crew had like taken up a part of downtown winnipeg and um and on like the one of the first days of their little occupation one of them was like yeah i had to uh i had to help this guy in the big rig uh figure out how to put it in gear. He didn't even know how to drive the thing. He just rented it. And so there was days of them being sort of upset with these fake truckers making a big stink downtown.

Right. And then at one point, one of them just came. I didn't hear anything. And then just this came on the radio. And it was just one guy being like guys can we just talk about snow please i didn't come here for trucks yeah i do like the idea that you could rent uh like a 18 wheeler yeah like when i met avis and i'm like they're like we could upgrade you would you like a yeah i'm sorry you your uh reservation came through expedia so you're getting a yeah yeah

yeah so you yes you will be getting a gigantic 18 wheel truck and uh oh you need a booster seat for the kids okay we, we got one. Yeah, we're all out of Miatas, but we do have a Peterbilt that's ready to go. You just have to make a stop in Canmore. Yeah, absolutely. And hurry up, this is a refrigerated truck. What a deal. Dave, do you have an an over Mine is from my daughter

Which daughter This is the five year old Who goes by the name of Poppy This is a good one guys Let's wrap in So Abby was playing

With Poppy and Poppy was being very cute and uh abby said to poppy when are you gonna stop being so cute and poppy looks abby up and down and says i don't know your age absolutely vicious vicious she didn't mean it that way she didn't know how vicious that was well the kids don't that's the thing is oh yeah i guess i don't know the exact cutoff for being cute but i'll be around then she brings out some aloe for her sick burn. Yeah. Graham got a bunch of lotion. Yeah, exactly. I'll drop by.

Yeah. Abby, I heard about that sick burn. Oh, that is so funny. Especially the look, like the look up down. When will I stop being cute? Now I got at least 35 years. At most 35 years um mine comes as a courtesy as a an overseen it's a graffiti overseen um it's a the property brothers now have a website called properly.ca

properly properly.ca that's. And I'm sorry. Yeah. Tim laughed and I, I got a laugh too. You saw graffiti through the property brothers. Okay, go ahead. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. So I thought it was like the property brothers have a street crew. Yeah. They're tagging everybody else's real estate signs. Yeah. Not cool, man. It's not cool man it's not cool it's part of the code um anyways i was hoping that you know somebody was going to do a bubble thing of

speaking but i thought maybe they would do both of them speaking at the same time this is my wishful thinking of graffiti okay uh but unfortunately it was just the one the clean shaven one it's okay before you i'm a little lost so this is there's an ad like a bus stop for this website okay okay an ad for this website on this bus uh bus stop and the two brothers one has a beard one doesn't that's how you can tell them what um uh and only one saying, but I think it's pretty cool. He's saying I suck blood. So it's not bad. It's not the best I've ever seen, but it's a solid effort.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Nice and random. Only one of them is saying, which one was it? The no beard, right? Let me see here.

No beard. No beard. Yeah? No beard, right? Let me see here. No beard. No beard. Yeah, no beard. Is bearded one flannel shirt? Neither of them are in flannel, actually. They're both in. Wait, what one of them is like a suit coat? The guy with the beard is the guy that's wearing the suit coat.

And the other guy is casual. Okay. They're both sitting on a couch together. Okay. What are they watching they're watching you standing at the bus stop they're from another dimension that's what's entertaining to them oh man the multiverse of the property brother yeah and they're crying um do they cry are they known for crying no but you can imagine you can imagine right yes yeah i guess i could crying twin tears um uh twins cry that's interesting yeah i don't know well i don't even know do they have blood maybe that's why he they said i suck blood maybe they don't have

twins have blood it's unknowable yeah yeah you can't know that i don't want to know it i'm fine with not knowing it it's gross you know should we start a side podcast project called do twins have blood or just like twin talk and uh we talk yeah we never have a pair of twins on it's all wild speculation on our part yeah how many twins did you go to school with? There's the Twin Towers. There was the Twin Cities. Twin Cities? I think at least. I went with three pairs that I could remember.

I think we at least had one, but maybe two. But I had a crush on one that was a part of a twin. And I thought she was really cute. And then, but her sister, who was a, they were identical twins, didn't look like her at i thought she was really cute and then but her sister who was a they were identical twins didn't look like her at all it was really funny like the same kind of uh bone structure i guess but their faces were completely different right um so i don't know how that happens but uh i'm cool with it uh hey no judgment here you're in the twin town you know what do whatever you want with your bones

Graham's not here to judge you fire me a free safe space for your skull every skull is beautiful yeah we also have overheard sent in by people all over the map if you want to send one in to us it's

spy at maximumfun.org the first one comes from to send one in to us it's spy at maximum fun.org the first one comes from matt right here in vancouver whoa i know yeah it's this is gonna hit home because it's so close uh local yeah it's this is some good local content this guy comes out from behind you all right i'm matt just let him tell it to him all right sorry sorry um while walking along the stanley park seawall my wife and i passed a man addressing a small group of apparent disciples saying no you cannot trademark the color white so that's a business class i guess um but it's one of those things if nobody ever asked yeah and you know maybe it's just what are ridiculous things that

have been trademarked? You talked about Gene Simmons trademarking the bag with the dollar sign. Yeah. Right. Donald Trump trademarked, you're fired. Right. And Paris Hilton tried to trademark, that's hot. That's hot?

Yeah. Yeah. Then that's hot. Yeah. And guys, that's hot. That's hot. That's hot. She's a real firecracker, that Paris Hilton.

She's there at the beginning of all the reality TV craze. Yeah. We owe her a great debt. Yeah, we do. We certainly do. She ushered in a new era of

toilet TV. This next one comes from Justin from St. Joseph de Busse, Quebec. My girlfriend was talking to her older brother and he mentioned that he was asked to make sangria to an upcoming party at work.

She asked him, oh, what will you put in your sangria and uh this person doesn't drink and has never made it before he could very confidently replied you know raspberry flavored vodka a little bit of smirnoff ice and red gatorade honestly without without googling it what would you put in tangria isn't wine wine is an ingredient right yeah wine water gummy bears spaghetti strained gummy bears wax lips and then garnish it's like wine juice and fruit chunks yeah yeah i think there's even juice there's a wine and like sparkling water might be wine sparkling water juice and food chunks that's when my

meatballs you can garnish it with a meatball on a stick this last one comes from jacob g from alpena michigan i got an overheard from the table behind us at a restaurant in michigan it was a table of six middle-aged and older people and one older man was saying eric's eric's doing really well really good numbers lots of cremations but really good numbers oh wow yeah we you know where we prefer to get more in the ground but yeah yeah yeah we'll take the cremation we gotta you know you gotta sell them to the yeah yeah yeah and but you know yeah he's killing it yeah let them think that there's it's not appropriate to have their ashes inside a carbo box we want people to think yeah yeah and also like i feel like people probably when they hear cremation they think hmm sounds creamy you want to get you want to people are gonna

gonna be drawn to the creaminess of that but like you gotta tell them there's no cream involved i bet you they're they're making a bank off the lactose intolerant market oh yeah you have any dairy-free cremations yeah this isn't like this isn't sangria you don't just mix wine and cream and make sangria is uh what do you do if you have an urn full of uh ashes and you pass away who do you have to pass that urn onto somebody or do they oh sure yeah uh yeah we've had musical chairs apartments get abandoned and uh and and then urn left behind oh really like you ever look inside there oh yeah it's pretty good eh make a few wishes abby's childhood dog uh we went and spread its ashes in switzerland like a decade ago and it there were a lot of like bone chunks in the ash

yeah yeah yeah yeah not a very thorough it's not a science it's a it's an art you know there's not there's no you're probably getting other other dogs dogs ashes like it's not yeah yeah that's true yeah one in one out that's why you gotta clean your oven and that's why you have to clean your oven in addition to overhears that are written and we also accept your phone calls if you want to call us our phone number is 1-844-779-7631 that's one spypod one like these people have

hi Dave hi Graham this is Devin from Portland Oregon I've got a overseen overheard here I do touch ups and wet fans on car lots like you know kind of shining turds to make cars look a little bit better. And there was a smashed dildo sitting next to where I was working, obviously left over

from whatever was happening the night before. And, you know, we laughed at it, and it sat there for most of the day. And then a older gentleman came in to get a touch-up on his car, and immediately looked at this broken dildo, and what is this thing? And picked it right up and inspected

it deeply. As the rest of us tried to keep our faces straight, one of the nice younger managers tried to motion him over to a place to throw it away and gave him some hand sanitizer, all the while not letting him know that he

had been fondling a broken dildo from the night before. I hope you guys are well. Enjoy the show. You probably saved him a lot of humiliation. You know? Unless it was a cover-up for like, he smashed up that dildo and left it the night before.

What is this? What even is this? How do you break a dildo? I know. I love the casualness of like the, you know, how you the night before you end up with break a dildo i know i love the casualness of like the you know how you the night before you end up with a smash deal was it paper mache was it a pinata all right next phone call hi dave graham impossible guest uh i haven't overseen for you guys i was driving to my friend's wedding a few days ago and i saw an old classic car

convertible driving on the highway and the license plate said hat man in all capital letters i don't know why i said that because license plates always have capital letters. And then when we passed him, he was wearing a hat. Nice. And a feather in it. And I loved it. Have a good day. That's called branding.

That's branding. Yeah. Sometimes you do want to meet your heroes, I guess. Yes. The hat man. Squee-pa-pa-pa-da-pa.

He's a hat man. Have you seenpa-pa-pa-da-pa. He's a hat man. Have you seen The Hat Man with Robert Pattinson? Did he say it's hatting time in that? Yeah, I like hats too, but I've never got a license plate reflecting that fact would you ever get a custom license plate yeah i would say another year man loves dream house and really screw people over like they're like does he like his dream house or does he like the 2018 film dream house and then when they drive past me i've got a stream house dvd on the dash yeah

uh it's a big license plate it is yeah it's huge it's one of those european ones oh sure get a second license plate why are european licenses and north american license and so different what the hell i didn't just want people you know just said okay this is the one design of license plates i think they have more time to read over there yeah that's true yeah you can really do a lot with nuance in your yeah i'm in the middle of a license plate what are you reading this summer what's your summer reading oh i'm in the middle of my friend's car's license I couldn't put this car down. Hey, Dave Graham, an awesome guest.

My name is Haley, and I'm an East Bend girl who now lives in Winnipeg, Manitoba. Whoa. Do you know her? Yes. Really? I don't know. I've never missed one of your Winnipeg shows. It always reminds me of home. I love it when you come to town.

So thanks so much. Okay, so the other day I was walking through our indoor skywalk, which is this really narrow walkway that goes through downtown Winnipeg. The people used to kind of stay out of the cold, and I got stuck behind these two people who are walking really slow the woman she pulls out of a phone and she says to the guy walking with her oh I got invited out to the comedy club to see Jay Jay from Jay and Silent Bob never heard of them and the guy she's with goes what you haven't heard of Jay and Silent Bob? I think he directed that movie Mall Cops. Like, you know, the one with the segues? Fucking hilarious. And she goes, why would I want to see a director do comedy?

way it was literally all i could do to not just scream like wrong answers only i thought your listeners would appreciate all the wrong terms that conversation tough oh yeah absolutely very frustrating to say the least love the show guys thanks um also why would you go see the guy who plays jay and silent bob at a comedy club that doesn't seem it doesn't seem right yeah jay what is his name muse something muse jason yeah he does he kind of does stand up i think i don't know he's been was he with silent bob no just jay they just put up a cut out of silent bob he's just quiet and yeah he's just quiet because it's like what penn and teller does the teller they just have a cut out of teller yeah totally yeah yeah that's how you can stay under water so long you know what my my trick is for uh if you're walking behind some really slow walkers you bring a bicycle bell with you yeah little ding ding ding ding and people will immediately

move out of the way okay that's a that's a life hack from tim gray life hack yeah tim do you really do that i did once i can't i misplaced my bell oh too bad you know what you need to get one of these tungsten carbide bells that just keep it on your finger you'll never get it off fused to my hand um well that brings us to the end of this program uh tim plug away let's hear what you got to say about what you're doing out there in the world okay well if you're in winnipeg you gotta come down to rumors comedy club i'll be there on tuesday august 9th you can get tickets already from the rumors website uh i'm doing a fun outdoor show at blue note park in winnipeg on july 4th you can come to that uh i post lots of pictures and videos of my dog peggy on my instagram tim gray rules with the zed

and uh yeah check out hunks and if you're in edmonton, come see Hunks there. I think I'm doing an improv show while I'm there too. Some stand-up possibly. Yeah. You got things happening. Things are going on. A couple things happening. That's great, man. Thanks so much for having me back on the podcast, you guys. Oh, you've been great.

Come on. Well, thank you for being our guest. Thank you out there the listener for taking the time to reflect to put that urn in your lap really sift around in the the dust

and we appreciate that you do that and if you could come back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. MaximumFun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Audience supported.