Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 784 - Charlie Demers

Episode Date: March 28, 2023

Comedian Charlie Demers returns IN STUDIO to talk new babies, hot dog commercials, and Avatar 2. Plus, it’s week 2 of MaxFunDrive 2023. Support the show at maximumfun.org/join.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 783 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark. With me as always is real, tangible, in-person, Mr. Dave Shumka. Hi Graham. Hello.

Yes, we're in studio for the first time in three years. Almost to the day. Dave's going to do a guitar like medley just to celebrate our kind of like yeah and it's gonna kind of go over the last three years of our lives uh that's got it's uh well the moon was uh over the city that night that the city shut down for the disease in the air and then graham and i we were uh flipping and flopping in our chairs there's not more is there that's pretty much sums up the lesson yeah but we so we're recording this on the ides of marshland what bad could happen today the ides man, I forgot to send my family an Ides card. I got kicked in the Ides. And, oh my gosh, I forgot to do a post about Julius Caesar.

Oh, we miss you, CZ. Inventor of. You know what? Just go eat at Little Caesar. Yeah. That's what he would have wanted. He loves Caesar salad. He loves, he invented the C-section.

He also has like cartoon hair coming out of his toga, which I feel is like, why did they? In what? Yeah. Little Caesars. Oh, in Little Caesars. Okay. Yeah. You meant like in all the famous statues of him.

Oh, no. Is he an Asterix? Is he a big character in Asterix? I don't know. Wow. Is he an Obelix? I think he might be an ovalix.

Um, yeah, so we're recording this on March 15th, 2023, Ides to you. Uh, the last time we recorded

in studio together, March 16th, 2020, with, uh, Adam, Adam Christie. Adam Christie.

Um, the day before all things were like, locking it down. Um, uh, before all things were like locking it down. Um, uh, but we're glad to be here. We're glad to be here.

And this is our second week of the max fun drive. This is the time every year where we, uh, we ask you, the listeners to dig deep, to support the show, to help us make the thing that you love. And we'll tell you more about it later.

There's tons of gifts you can get for supporting the show, for becoming a Maximum Fun member. We like this time of year also to bring out our favorite guests. Yeah, and this guy filled in for that last minute because our favorite guest died suddenly. Our favorite guest, Julius Caesar. He's a fantastic comedian, friend of the show. So nice to have you here.

Charlie Demers. Oh, it's so well. I've been stuck in this studio for three years. And so it's yeah recording podcast at night yeah and i've composed the the perfect podcast for dave my angel of podcast uh no and it was uh uh it it's it's very exciting to be back in what me and my internet friends call meat space or IRL with you boys. Did you say meat space? Like M-E-A-T?

Yeah, meat space. Really? Yeah, that was, I mean, meat space is like a cliche. I haven't heard it. But yeah, meat space is like where you can touch. You can eat burgers. Oh, that's fun. This is a safe area for people to eat burgers and bacon and whatnot. Safe for farmers.

And yeah, the only thing I really wished I could have added to the conversation before I was introduced was that was Julius Caesar in asterisk. Uh, um, uh, he was a mere footnote. Pretty good.

Yeah. Uh, cause the, he would have an asterisk. Yeah. Um, and then you'd go down to the bottom of the page. Sure.

There he is. Julius Caesar. Mere footnote. So a, a mere footnote. Well, welcome Charlie. Should we get to know us?

Mm-hmm. get to know us oh guys it feels good yeah back in the new york groove yeah and listeners we're uh you don't get used to this we're probably gonna be back on zoom next time this is uh this is you know this is, uh, this is, you know, this is, this is a special time. Yeah. It feels good to pay less. Yeah. It doesn't it? Yeah. Yeah. Um,

but it's fun to be thumb wrestling. It is fun to be thumb wrestling. We had a little apple Bob before the recording. Potato sack race. Yeah. We did most of the thing. We did those, you know,

uh, egg on a spoon, sponge race. Yeah. We all basically treated each other like fatherless children. And we just kind of reclaimed that way.

We said, what if we could all be each other's dads? And it was pretty wonderful. Yeah. We saw a dream. We went for it. We shot it.

We shooted our shot. Yeah. We shooted it. We were each other's Octavian. Yeah. Right? I don't know. Charlie's been reading a lot lastavian. Yeah. Right? I don't know.

Charlie's been reading a lot last year. Yeah, I've done a, I used the pandemic to do a ancient Rome deep dive. So if you guys want to play, I'd demarche. Oh, I don't, I don't. Look, I'm just going to rest on my laurels. I guess that's the thing for me.

Charlie. Yes. Since we last talked, you have become a father for the second time. It's true. By. Manon. By Manon. By accident.

Yes. Yeah. This baby is strong enough for a man, but made by a woman. And for people who don't know. See, the thing about Zoom is you get lagged. Yeah, you can't get in there with men in. Yeah, yeah. The, no, I had a baby by cesarean section. Oh, wow.

On this very day. Yeah, on this very day. We had little. This morning. Little baby eyes. They really should do like a half off cesarean sections of baby Ides. They really should do like a half off cesarean sections of the Ides of March. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. St. Patrick's Day. Get like a group. If you wear green, you get 25%. Yeah. Little baby Julius. Have there ever been kind of double bookings? You think kind of an Ides of March party?

I'm St. Patrick's Day party. I thought you were going to talk about a double up on the Caesarean section. Like they've oversold. We've oversold. Does anybody want to get a Caesarean at a different hour? Actually, I sliced a little too hard. I gave your baby a C-section as well.

Oh, gee. I thought it was, yeah. Like some Irish guy on March 17th, march 17th you think you're special because you stabbed somebody in the stomach um but uh but no i had a beautiful baby boy at the end of january um uh gestated and delivered by my wife cara um, baby Pascal, born on January 28th by Caesarian section for branding purposes. January 28th was like, yeah, we knew it. Well, that's Chinese Ides of March.

And so, yeah, because we're on the lunar calendar, that's Ides of March. But so we are very happy. I mean, we're a lot better rested than we were the first time. And our first child is nine. There's, um, there's just this kind of incredible, uh, uh, span of time between them that is just kind of, uh, like a wonderful thing. Like she, they're just kind of smitten with each other. And, um, she, Josephine, our, our, our oldest is, is like an incredible, she like helps out around, like she did the cesarean. It was her idea. She made helps out. Like she did the cesarean. It was her idea. She made it happen.

I'm happy to have a younger brother or sister, but. Yes, exactly. And so, yeah, no, we're just kind of, we're just kind of floating. Are there, so they're nine years apart. Are there any things that like, if your kids were four years apart, you'd be like, they're Olympic babies. Yes. Oh, yes. We had sex on the Olympics.

We had sex nine months before the Olympics at the nationals. Yes. Time trials. Are there any things that happened nine years apart? Nine years apart. Like Haley's Comet or something. Oh, yeah. Every nine years.

Haley Joel Comet. Is he still around? Haley Joel Comet? Yeah, I think nine years Haley Joel Comet Is he still around Haley Joel Comet Yeah I think so Yeah he was in the Entourage There are very few Nine year cycles Aren't there

Yeah There is The Every nine years The US Supreme Court kind of reshuffles they move into each other's chairs

each one moves down one well they move one a year and then by the ninth year they just go we've done a full rotation feeling fine at nine he says and then one of them they choose to uh stab a la eid's right um so you say you're more well rested this time yes why is it because of

josephine it's i i think it's like one like so did you find with the second baby the experience and like knowing what you're doing maybe you were a little bit more chilled out or yeah maybe because i think what it is is like um so one thing is i mean you're very there's really not much you can do but support as the father in the first like really almost a year you can also walk out that's another player. He's going to grab some cigarettes. But, and so you're all just kind of worked up and looking for things to do and looking for, whereas like when you have another kid in the house, it's just like, well, I'm just now entirely responsible for everything having to do with this kid. having to do with this kid. And so you just like, if that kid's having trouble sleeping, you're with them and you wake up to take them to the school bus and you make the lunches and you, whatever. And then all of the kind of most of the kind of direct infant care is like, um, is Kara. And so, uh, it's like, I'm getting a little bit less sleep than I usually do,

but it's just 11 hours. Yeah. I'm down to like house cat level. Yeah. Down from koala. In fact, I'm, I am working on a book from Koala the House Cat. How Keto changed my life. Kara's getting longer, more interrupted sleep than me. And I'm getting shorter, more contiguous sleep than her. And we're both just kind of like, I didn't want to say anything. Cause it's like, it's, you know, the dad saying, oh, things are easy. You're just kind of setting yourself up. But like Kara goes, this is way easier this time.

Huh? And so I was like, well, I'm glad you said that because I have a lot of observations starting with, you know, a koala. But so, yeah, it's just, I don't know. It's,

it's, it's been, um, it, and I, he's a bit of an easier baby. He sleeps on his own. Josephine in the first couple of months would only sleep if she was lying on someone's chest.

My kids are still like that. Oh yeah. You have to do a very long protracted bedtime. Yeah. Yeah. Like they're smothering me every day. Yeah. Whose chest do you want to lie on tonight?

Well, I mean, now that there's two of them, it's a free for all. Yeah. Do you find with Margo and Poppy that Margo was like in on the helpy out kind of side or at least like excited. She was two. Oh, she was two.

Yeah, she was two. So there was not much helping. I found that the routine we got into was like, if I ever had an errand to run, I was like, take a kid. Right. Yeah. Take whichever one is awake.

Yeah. And then that'll help out. See, like Josephine will change a diaper and that diaper is as changed as if anyone else in the house has changed it. Yeah. Like, and,

and that was like, uh, like an epiphany. Like when we, we, we, we had been home from the hospital like two, three days. And, uh, the baby starts fussing in his little, like he was lying down and he starts fussing and we're finishing dinner and Kara and I kind of make eye contact trying to like gauge like, okay, who's.

Now, just for the listener at home, Charlie is miming eating dinner while making eye contact, not missing a scoop the whole meal yeah and so we're trying to kind of do this sort of uh uh david attenborough documentary dance of like signaling to each other who is gonna and like while that's happening josephine like goes over scoops him up kind of onto her shoulder like uh patting him and was like, that could not have been more helpful if like any adult in our house, in our family or life was in the house. And so, um, that was like, oh, wow. Uh, you know, it's a crazy age span in a lot of ways. Like it's, it's nuts.

Crazy rich age span in a lot of ways like it's it's nuts crazy rich age span two out of three ain't bad it's been amazing so i feel like yeah if you don't want to have a kid as old as i am which is 42 yeah you don't have a baby that's born at 40 no you do not want to have a kid as old as I am, which is 42. Yeah, you don't want to have a baby that's born at 42. No, you do not want to have a 42-year-old baby. Unless you are like the world's most devoted Jackie Robinson fan. 42, baby!

If you don't want to be as old as me then i like i like have one kid at when you're like 22 and then the next one at like uh whatever nine yeah from 22 31 yeah does being at 42 uh does that like how much does it change it are you exhausted more by by everything that's going on yeah i mean um should i have a kid at 45 you want so yeah like this is the um i've been surprised by how physically similar it feels i thought it was gonna be way harder like i thought we were gonna be way more exhausted right um it's mentally very different right um you know our lives are in a very different place than they were with josephine yeah let's just say everything was right out in front of me when josephine was born. And now we're settling down to a good old helping of realistic expectations. And so in some ways it's, you know, good.

But like I would say almost all the differences are mental as opposed to as opposed to physical, which I wasn't expecting. I was expecting it to be like physically way harder this time around. Because just. Just being that much older. Yeah. We're nine years older than we were. What, um, what is your biggest ache and pain? Oh, that's good.

Yeah. We'll all go around. This is, uh, and I say this today on a day with a hurting knee. And I, as you know, boys struggle with headaches, but that's been since I was a kid. And I can't really chalk that up to any creeping old madness. This is a predictable answer, but it's my back. And now if I bend over to like change a diaper, like now your back is going like what are you doing move the kid up to a higher yeah get the kid on a vertical yeah slide it right into this diaper get him to come to you yeah get a diaper bag that you can just drop them into um so i would say like

that one you notice that one you notice and maybe a little bit more in the shoulders from holding them a lot. Yeah. So, yeah, I would say my back is where I feel good for nine years. I got, I got a trick neck. A trick neck. Yeah. So some days I will get up and it's just, I'm locked. I can't, I can't look either way.

And I've got some physio things that I do and it helps a lot. And they take like Advil and all that kind of stuff. Oh yeah. You got it. I love it. I love ibuprofen. You got it. What about you?

It's good. It's my core, my hips and lower back. Yeah. Yeah. Some days they're just so stiff. Yeah, man. The core. Do you even, like you probably, do you you know yeah either you guys know what your core

is i'm not sure like i've heard use your core but then i just want to flex your seeds are yeah guys let's all do a kegel oh something coming out i did a reverse kegel owner of the montreal expos that's how they got released to washington because he did a reverse kegel yeah um it's uh uh yeah it i yeah your core core is not like uh is that like an official designation to a region well that's the like i have no idea because when they say okay so here's the thing is when we were doing these on zoom i had an extra computer going and i was googling

things now i'm what are we doing and we never did this when we were in person before. No, no. Like I would never take something out. No, this is, you would never take something out, do a reverse K. No. Okay. Just, your core is the central part of your lower body. It includes your pelvis, lower back, hips, and stomach.

Yeah. So like when somebody says engage your core, like a physio or whatever, I just think it's flexing your stomach. Yeah. Or squeezing your bum. Yeah. Tight. But but yeah i don't know what it means and then they're just they get no just engage your core i'm like i am i am no engage it do you want to get married yeah boy will you make me the luckiest uh core owner coroner that was the uh da vinci's inquest rom-com spin-off which you make me the luckiest coroner starring nicholas campbell yeah oh man da vinci's Inquest is kind of like Canada's Quincy. Yeah.

Oh, I think of it as like Canada's The Wire. But Quincy was a coroner, wasn't he? Oh, yeah. That's right. That is what Quincy was. Yeah. I thought she was a medicine woman. No, she's a record bruiser.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Rashida Jones' mom. Yeah. Do you guys' mom. Yeah. Do you guys, either of you guys go to physio ever? I, if it was on my knee, I hurt my knee playing hockey a few weeks ago. I went to the doctor and he... Guess what he told him.

Guess what he told him. Who he... Dave, you got to try to have fun. Don't matter what you do. But he's a fool. I don't know. I don't know that. But, and he was like, yeah, go get some physio.

Every time I sit down with my doctor, he's like, you got good health coverage? I'm like, no, I have nothing. I have nothing. I'm a podcaster. I do like that's happened to me at the dentist too. Like, how's your coverage? I'm like, minimal. Qu do like that's happened to me at the dentist too. Like, how's your coverage? I'm like, minimal. Quote me the lowest

possible price. And he was like, well, ask around and see if any of your loser friends have a good fit to you. And so I made a physio appointment for

tomorrow and then today heard it's canceled. They cancel on you? Yeah, they cancel on me. I've never had that happen before. Did you tell them you have a 48 hour cancellation policy? And they owe you $225?

Yeah, man. I need some of that coverage for that $225. Yeah, no kidding. My aunt and uncle just bought me a Dr. Hose. Is this the electric? Yeah, the electrodes. And what does it do?

It like shakes you? Vibrates you? Shakes you. Does it electrocute you? Yeah, it's got little pulses. There's these four little pads and two big pads. And it just sends a little shocks, three different kinds. You can choose.

Oh, what is your favorite? Uh, B B mode B, A, B and C and I'm more of a B man. What do you do? Where do you put that? Uh, I had done it on my lower back. I tried it on my knee and did not, uh, my leg was like, what do you think you're doing? Um, and. But like, what does he mean?

Like, did your leg start kicking wildly? Like it was just, yeah, my leg was like, get this off me, get it off me, get it off me right now. Right. Whereas my back was like, okay. And do you see your muscles like flexing? Uh, if you were watching them closely, yeah. It's hard to see it on your back.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, but you could get it. Because of my Yakuza tattoos. Yeah, you can make the demon start talking. Exactly. All right, let's all have a sip. Liquids, eh? Yeah, yeah, yeah. keep them up um so you're your dad for the second time you're an author for the

fifth time um oh well i mean i um just did you so I had a book come out, um, last, uh, spring, like late last spring, like June. It was my, um, uh, sixth and a half book. Like it's, it's my seventh book. If you count the coauthored book, it's my sixth like solo, uh, book. Um, but I guess it, so I guess it, it came out in the States, I think in, in, in. the coauthored book. It's my sixth solo book. But I guess, so I guess it came out in the States, I think,

in October. When were you last here? I'm just looking that up. Yeah. It now feels weird to just take out my phone and look at stuff. You were last here

May of last year. Oh, so yeah. So since the last, it really has been since May? No, no. Charlie Demers returns to talk about

writing seven books. Oh, yeah. Downgraded to six and a half. Yeah, downgraded, yeah. So my own, I mean, that's deflation. So, yeah, I mean, that book came, I've signed to write a sequel to that book, but I'm doing, uh, I'm doing some, I'm doing some writing.

Um, and, uh, the, the, the comedy stuff is starting to kind of come back, um, into a more sort of regular shape now. Like, I mean, the audiences are still bad and cold to you. And that hasn't like. That hasn't changed. Same as before the pandemic. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, well, we did a debaters, you and I. When was that? Like a couple. Yeah. Like a few weeks ago. A few weeks ago. And that was the first no spaced spaced seating no mask no like and and that was like it was like rains after a drought like i mean the yeah that feeling of like uh you could

hear them and feel them again that they were like oh yeah they were just full of COVID that they were super spreading. Yeah. Yeah. Cause like, uh, I've been to shows now where it's there. The audiences aren't big, so don't worry about that as much. I think it's like Andy Killers.

Like if you need elbow room, like come to my show, like guaranteed you'll have all the table to yourself. But I feel like the virus has changed in some way or another where it's like, we're vaccinated enough. But like, you're not hearing about super spreader events. You're hearing about people getting sick from their wives. Yeah. From nightclub comics.

And it's sick of their wives wives that's what you're hearing about hey let me tell you something i give me covid if you get by covid you mean 72 hours of isolation that was such a core of comedy in that era oh yeah was i hate my wife i hate my wife she's a disease and then louis ck kind of did that for a while i hate my wife i hate my kids yeah yeah he was the uh yeah major um my my kids an idiot uh yeah he was the he was the first to really break through with that yeah yeah i would the thing that like like i don't know i mean i don't i don't mean to sound like the church lady or about this or anything like that like isn't that special

there's there's no one less dumb than kids kids are like supercomputers they they like quadruple their knowledge of everything every like seven months yeah there's no one you meet who's less stupid than a kid yeah every adult you meet is like actively losing huge swathes of knowledge and expertise and like uh i just haven't i just don't understand how anyone who spends time with children and be like, look at this fucking idiot who just learned an entire language with totally inconsistent rules in 18 months.

Fucking dummy. And she still shits herself. Yeah. Damn came in fourth in soccer. Look how little your legs still are Grow some legs Idiot

But then there's bound to be a whole generation Of people who Are growing up thinking oh kids are Awful because of this Because you get a lot more exposure To the like my kids are annoying, my kids are awful. No, other people's kids are annoying. Yeah, that's true.

Right. Yeah, no, it's a and then there was like two years where the only kids you saw, wait, you just saw your own kid. I didn't even have that. I had binoculars out the window at some kids. Hey uh you know i don't know if you found this with your like but like

there was a point during the like real kind of lockdowny times of the pandemic not that we were ever super locked now sort of in robert lockdown-y times of the pandemic. Not that we were ever super locked down. Now we're sort of in Robert Lockdown-y Jr. times. I'm doing great today. Yeah, you're doing great. Yeah. Yeah, see? This is why we do Meat Space. So come on down to Meat Space,

the artisan butchery. That would be very funny if there was a butcher called Meat Cute and it was just all like Just veal? Yeah It's actually nightmarish They're like, we really didn't

think this through, but we got we got rabbit and we got lamb and we got veal. Piglet. He's suckling pig. Just take this suckling pig. Me cute. Just the logo is Tom Hanks

and Meg Ryan crying over a barbecue. But there was one point where, like, when I was picking up Josephine from school, like, there's another dad, and I really get along with the dad, and our kids are best friends. And I realized, like, after a few weeks,

I was like, oh, my God god this guy's my best friend like this is the only person i see yeah who i'm not married to or that i didn't make yeah yeah literally the only person i see like like that that was a that was a wild time man, when I found out that my subway lady was my old... Like, well, you're the only one I see on a consistent basis, and this feels good. Yeah. Is it weird to hang out with people that your only common thing is the kid? That's what my marriage is. And let me tell you, it's no picnic.

It's a picnic, but it's all ants. No, it is weird. I'm not good at it. I've never gotten the thing of watching your two kids play and talking to another the thing of like, uh, you know, watching two kids, your, you know, your two kids play and talking to another dad and be like, uh, yeah. Hi, sir. Yeah.

No, I can't do it. That's why with this guy who I get along with, you know, that's why we kind of, it was like, oh, the kids love each other and, and all the grownups in the family click. Like we now, like we see them, we like, we'll do stuff as families and like, you know, we'll go out for dinner and, and, or, you know, go to the park. That does sound like a best friend. It is like, it's a good situation because I can't do what you, what you're describing.

Just chat. And when that really happens is baby time and you meet people who you're like i mean the joke i was just like well yeah well you know we're we're jewish and and they're nazis but our kids are the same age and so we can like people just like not only nothing in common but like active antinomy yeah yeah yeah find themselves like yeah, but Skyler's 13 months and Retrex's 14 months. Abby was in a group of moms that all had babies around the same time. And there's like a, there were like mom group. Right.

There was like a community center thing for moms to go to. And Abby met a cool group of moms that she liked. And they, you know. They did things together. We would get together for picnics and stuff. My kid did not like any of their kids. There was never any connection. Went to all

their birthday parties. We walked past a community center the other day and I was like, oh yeah, you went to a birthday party there. And she was like, I don't remember. I don't know who that person is that you're talking about yeah because um it's uh moshe kasher comedian former like uh past guest yeah former past guest he said that having a kid means that you end up talking to a lot of people that came at the same time as you that is so funny that is so funny and like bleakly accurate and i can't do small talk like i'm i'm the person they like at a family gathering

when people start like getting into like oh yeah and and and you know we figure there's about 18 more months on the roof. I'll, like, I'll say, like, can you believe we're talking about your roof? Like, I just can't even, like, handle it. Wait, who's got 18 more months on the roof? I have no idea. They can fix a roof in a day. I mean, I meant in that scenario, I meant, like, 18 more months until they would have to get their roof fixed.

Oh, right. That's how i imagine home ownership you're just sitting in front of a chart all year you're like toilet 13 more years furnace seven more years roof 18 months there's i, on my block, they knocked down two houses within a week of each other. And just, this was a couple of years ago. This was during, I guess, early pandemic. Who knows anymore? And then like the next week after they knocked down those two houses, a roofing company came and like started throwing tiles off this other house. And I was like wow

they're gonna be building three houses this roof is gonna take weeks they were done the next day yeah yeah i didn't realize there's not unless it's like something's really really broken it's just like you patch up the leak well it was a full complete new roof but it was a lot of guys you gotta do a new roof what like? Like every 20 years, 25 years. Is that what you do in the house? And if you told me that it was yearly, I'd believe you. It's like a snake. It just sheds its skin.

Like every year a house kind of naturally. Every six months you go to the dentist, they send over their roofing guy. I was going to ask, like when you were a kid and your mom or dad were going to pick you up. Did you find that they talked to the other parent like a long time and it was just you and your friend like, oh man, when is this going to. Sometimes. And then sometimes I had my parents be like, look out the window for my car. So funny. I do not want to talk to this person.

My dad is very social. Like he's the kind of center of every circle. Like he, like he, he, I mean, now he's been in Halifax for 20 years, but my dad had been in Halifax five years and had more friends than like people who live in a place their whole life. Like he, and so he's just always been that, that guy. And so he, yeah.

Want to talk and catch up with people and, and, and he came to pick me up. Me and my best friend and next door neighbor, Sean's every, he picked us up from Cubs and then drove us home. from cubs and um then drove us home and they got home and realized that he'd forgotten my little brother when he'd come to pick us up for cubs and he had left nicky in the building so i had to drive back in and go get him yeah yeah of course this is like obviously pre cell phones by about, you know, uh, a long time. And, uh, so,

um, yeah, that was, uh, there is too much socializing. Yeah. At a pickup. Yeah.

Uh, getting everything solved by a cell phone is in every horror movie. They have to disable that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Service.

My thing's broken. It runs out of battery. Yeah. This is the same place in 1982. Yeah. Yeah. Cause it's like, yeah, everything would be solved, you know, I don't get service my thing's broken I run out of battery yeah this takes place in 1982 yeah exactly because it's like yeah everything would be solved

you know Google name of address oh several people died sometimes on my phone there's neighborhoods I walk through I get one bar

oh yeah and I'm like oh I can't but if everybody knows your name that's the only bar you need fine fine fine.

I'll allow it. Like an indulgent judge. I'll allow it. But this line of questioning better. Yeah. Oh, it will, Your Honor. Norm, what's up, Mr. Peterson? My nipples, it's freezing out there.

Your Honor badgering the witness oh my god that's so cool did you know the new fraser takes place in boston really and has no niles no i know no niles is on it but here's the thing they didn't do it in cairo and we're i just want to warn the guests. We're not always going to be in person. It's going to be like a Zoom. This is good. This is good flow.

Somebody takes the nilometer to the Frasier reboot. Nothing. I got nothing. Why would they even make it if they couldn't get nil? I don't know why they make anything well oh yeah that's true like just for because it's going to be on tv or is it on stream but it's also like it's live it's a live show and you have to go see it but you have to go to boston to see it i would if there was a fraser live show it's the all of them, I don't know who you're like trying to get an audience that is now old.

Yeah. That can't figure out what like peacock streaming is or whatever. Yeah. They think peacock streaming is how you make no peacocks. But it's like. Oh, Charlie's wiggling his head so much it's going to roll off. The Will and Grace one came and went. The Murphy Brown one. Like. The Murphy Brown one. Half of them were dead. so much it's gonna roll off the will and grace one came and went the murphy brown one no like

murphy brown half of them were dead literally murphy brown was on the air when that story about leaving my brother at cubs happened yeah and i remember because it was monday nights i would call murphy brown was what was on when i got yeah sure murphy brown major dad uh major major dad i think you know he made his mistakes but mostly he was pretty great Yeah, sure. Murphy Brown, Major Dad. Oh, Major Dad. He's a Major Dad. I think, you know, he made his mistakes, but mostly he was pretty great. Who is his secretary?

Was called Gunny? I don't know. I feel like that's, which is stupid now that I think about it because the military guy loves guns. He's called Gunny.

We were talking before the show about Nucky from Boardwalk Empire. Boardwalk Empire. Boardwalk Empire. Now that name was the never again. What if the reboot was Frazier's now the dad. He's the old guy. And then his son, he goes to Boston.

His son, Freddy, is a police officer. See, that would be, you should be in that writer's room. Yeah. They kick me out every time i get in there yeah like if the sun was kind of a mega cop that's that is that what is happening or no that's just my oh wow that's a great pitch yeah there's a really good pitch because then you just you reverse engineer the whole yeah uh the whole thing and like yeah so why don't we get a little writer's room going for reboots we'll just do that to everything yeah it's a show about everything it's about life death relationships religion politics puffy shirts

even the puffy shirt doesn't escape without uh that show is so not the show about nothing it is about everything yeah like the funniest most things going on in a sitcom well you know it's not really the yeah it's it was originally pitched as a show about how a comedian gets his material this is the now my youtube feed is all oh man para seinfeld and para sopranos like meta criticism right people who i sometimes have really insightful things to say sometimes have nothing insightful to say yeah and the insightful ones are really only so much better than the non-insightful ones where you're just like is this the culture no like is this the whole thing instagram will will be like here's how to put together an outfit i'm like you're not an expert what do you know like who's another one of these people who doesn't know anything and just has a phone i can put together

one damn outfit oh yeah oh and you're i feel like that you've been, but you've been kind of taking this all in by osmosis. Magazines and your partners kind of immersed in the world. And like you, you, you've been learning how to piece together an outfit for, you know, your whole adult life. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And a lot of my teens too. Yeah. Were you, I guess I've never never asked were you a well-dressed

teen no no i you know what it i was i as i became as i moved from child sizes to grown-up sizes i was like oh i'm a large i'm a large person because i'm i'm six feet tall i'm large i'm so big now i'm so big now so i bought large everything until i was about just went from please mom to uh the big and tall story you're like i'm big i'm tall yeah i'm mommy's big tall boy just just massive tent sized hawaiian shirts but yeah i remember like uh i didn't at all i went the opposite way i went baggy everything and and And then I also like would buy a lot of vintage clothes. And sizes were a lot different. Like I feel like we've changed as a country. As a species.

If you see an old movie, like the kid that gets called like fat in a movie. Oh, I know. Like I saw, what was I watching? Is it the Naked City? Is that the one that goes, there's 8 million stories in the Naked City? Yeah, so it's the Naked City. There's 60 million boobs. Well, I think there would still be about 8 million boobs.

Unless New York is just a woman-only space. New York's kind of known as a safe space. I've got boobs. Can you milk me? Yeah. It's like, so I think it's 19, anyways, 30s, I think. They made it 30s or 40s. I think it's 19, anyways, 30s, I think they made it. 30s or 40s. I think 40s.

And there's one scene where a bunch of street urchins are playing in the water from a fire hydrant. And two kids are like, look at the whale. The whale should stay in the water. And it's like a kind of, like an airy suggestion of huskiness around this kid who's getting called the whale like you wouldn't even notice this kid in 2023 like and it's the same thing i was as if you a harborfront once and we were looking at this old like archival book that had pictures from like classroom photos oh yeah from like 1901 or something and it had the kids nicknames with their names and it's like yeah you know patrick

fatty o'rourke and um tim timothy fatty callahan first of all he batted an eye and put it, and the kids still call him fatty. Can I put that in there? But these kids are like, if you saw them today, you'd be like, are you okay? Like when's the last time you ate? To be called fat anytime before like 1971, all you had to look like was like not actively starving yeah yeah man oh man i've yeah i've seen that like um pictures in a book for about like old side shows and stuff like that and the the largest man in the world it was like fairly small yeah 215

pounds and there's like see the man with four tattoos yeah yeah exactly oh man

that was such a big deal back in the day that's what like like a lady pastor has now it's like four tattoos oh man what's going on you dave well before we get to me let's take a little break and talk about the max fun drive charlie shut up hi hi it's us from before hey there you you look so good i uh you may not know even though we mentioned it earlier but this is the most wonderful time of the year we're talking about max fun drive oh aren't you a lucky duck here comes some chat about it and here's how important max fun drive is to us for the first time in three years graham and a guest came into

my home and are recording this episode right now yeah and it's wild man it's wild to be around people it's uh it's a real trip yeah graham's a bit of a bubble boy yeah yeah yeah i uh you know what and if you uh decide to join up i'll get a nicer bubble i'm look i've got one there oh really i've got my eye on what's your current bubble situation uh it's just a cheap plastic that i got from a dollar store and just blew it up. And now I'm just living inside it. But I want something that's made out of it. Is it like on Seinfeld, the Bubble Boys is just a room divided?

Or is it like a hamster ball? It's like a hamster ball. And I can run around as much as I please. But I'm trying to keep ahead of that cat. i please and uh but i'm trying to keep ahead of that cat that cat and it's tough to like uh you know eat in there you know you set up a spread you set up a little picnic table and you reach for the you know uh your cashews why would you have cashews you're allergic well i just show off that i can afford cashews and then uh as you're reaching the whole bubble shifts all the you know you spill your yeah lemonade all over your ass now speaking of crazy things that can

happen to a person we do bonus content we do so much bonus content right now that is a crazy thing that can happen to a person but the crazy thing that could happen is a little guy named mr bean if it's gonna happen to anybody it's gonna happen to him yeah we so if you you said what max fun drive is we just talked about being in a bubble. Yeah. Yeah. You jumped to Mr. Bean. Okay. Max Fun Drive. It's this time of year when we ask you

to support the show. Our show is 100% listener supported. We don't do ads. We don't do sponsorships. We don't, I won't wear, you know,

a shirt emblazoned with Epson on it. The official printer of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Epson. Make mine an Epson. And I'll wear a race car driver outfit with no ads on it. How about that? And I drive a NASCAR with no ads ads on it so it's basically a corolla

um but you the listeners pay for this show you pay for us to be able to be silly to have an aimless show that goes nowhere yeah that's right somehow satisfies our creative vision yeah and you know what we're we're very proud of the people who are our audience i think we have a great group of people that listen to the uh podcast and it's a very uh very nice and wonderful to have you as listeners some of you which are subscribers uh that that does that is means a lot to us. And so thank you for listening. And thank you if you are considering signing up as a member. Thank you, thank you, thank you. And if you're someone who can't support the show, doesn't have money available to spend

a few dollars a month, we get it. Yeah, absolutely. And that's fine and uh hopefully you you have a better year next year and you know you can pass the savings on to us yeah that's right and uh yeah because that our content is always going to be free and uh you know so you can listen to all the episodes we've ever made uh for free so for free but um if you are someone who supports the show already thank you so much we are happy to give you a little bit of bonus content every month a couple of bonus episodes of just me and graham fooling around i think you said something about mr b i did uh we do a mr

bean podcast where we describe and have fun with every single episode of mr bean we're recording number 10 yeah we only have five left but uh in addition to that we we do some other silly episodes like we play the seinfeld game yeah we uh yeah if you don't if you're not a member you don't know the seinfeld game but it's a game where i describe one plot from an episode of seinfeld and graham has to describe the plot of the other three characters it's tons of fun and you know what i would say joining up for that alone would be uh would be i'd recommend so uh you want to you want to hear that bonus stuff we want you to hear that bonus stuff yeah oh do we want you ever do we ever want you

you can also if you're signing up uh and you know somebody that would love to be a member you can buy a subscription for them or you can be an anonymous donor and somebody out there will be able to get all the bonus content and be able to support uh their shows that they love which is a great thing if you can do that that's amazing but yeah you can be an anonymous donor the receiver can be anonymous you two could be like sharing a meal oh yeah or like you could be making eyes at each other on a train and not know that you've paid for the other one to have a membership. Yes, yeah. There was a movie with Geena Davis and Michael Keaton where they were carrying on a relationship, but they didn't know that one of them was a speechwriter for a Democrat and the other one was a speechwriter for a Republican.

So just like that. Yeah, there's one where Meg Ryan has a small bookstore and Tom Hanks has a big bookstore and they don't know that they're corresponding on email together. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's like that. It's like that. Yeah.

Go to maximumfund.org slash join. It'll ask you how much you want to uh give every month and it will ask you what shows you want to support and your support goes directly to the shows you listen to yeah and uh yeah do it right now maximum fun dot org slash join we love you join we love you what's going on with you day well okay guys i recently encountered my a song that's been stuck in my head oh and this is a song from a commercial and i'm gonna play it this isn't mr saxo beat no this isn't mr saxo beat it's just always in my head a little bit yeah going um this is a song it's from a commercial a new Canadian commercial

for the Canadian mall food court brand can you guess what it is? New York fries? yes and let's see if it'll play here I want a hot dog

a juicy quarter pound hot dog topped with loaded toppings like chili cheese and bacon fully loaded with delicious toppings give your taste buds something to sing about at new york fries and all day long i've just been i want a hot dog the beginning of the video sees like a just a hot dog by itself no bun no bun in the air yeah in the studio though yeah yeah yeah and it just i love it because you don't really see commercials like that you don't hear jingles like that no that's true and you don't hear pop punk like that anymore You don't hear jingles like that anymore. No, that's true. And you don't hear pop punk like that anymore. No.

I mean, you know, Blink-182 is back together, and I think they release songs that are just exactly the same when they're 20. Same kind of general subject matter. Nobody wants you when you're not a hot dog. Is there any connection between New York Fries and New York? Or is it like a Boston pizza situation? It's a Boston pizza situation.

I'm pretty sure it's just a Canadian thing. And I've been like, I think that song is so great. And I've been like sending it to people. James Pasquez, James Hartnett, who was in a New York Fries commercial. Oh, shit. And I know he likes pop punk I sent it to him and he was like hey that's cool but no one's like no one loves it the way I do I sent it to Chris and Pat Kelly and they were like great song Dave but you know I didn't make

it like I just do you think this is great does anyone care oh I want a hot dog. I really liked it. It's also like it shows all the loaded like toppings and what's the last thing like? Oh, do you want to hear it again? Yeah. Hot dog spinning in the air. Oh, it's like a cheese.

Bacon. Give your taste blood something to sing about at new york fries what's the what's the final lyric fully loaded with delicious toppings now i'm guessing yeah okay i mean i wonder if we'll see a return to this kind of advertising where it's just like, this is our soap. Yeah. You use it. Soap for you. Like that's what everything used to be. Yeah.

Yeah. Do you, um, uh, do you like a hot dog with stuff on it? I, I'll do the classic three, um,

relish mustard. Oh, I mean, but like, uh, a fully loaded hot dog, delicious toppings, like chili geez a bacon to me i would say an ideal hot dog situation uh is um i mean i'm gonna answer sincerely even

though dave is i'm gonna try and have the conversation that graham wants to have i feel like you're just about to set up a fun, fun joke. Here's the hot dog situation I would like. Mine's an oompa poppa. I'd like a hot dog with some mustard and some sauerkraut. Let us have some hot dogs when we're going out. When everyone will have some wiener everyone will be a winner

we will go and have some hot dogs now good that's as good as anything out there that is great New York Fry

also did you know New York Fry sells hot dogs no this is although it was also a similar

reality check when Orange Julius started selling hot dogs well Orange Julius they were always in the hot dogs weren't they yeah like if said uh i want a hot dog that is a real problem african orange julius hot dog yeah orange julius has never had to advertise they're just in the mall that's

true and you know what they're up to yeah i mean the OJ trial was kind of a long term. Oh yeah. Product tie in. Yeah. That's true. Yeah. But they, um, they had loaded hot dogs like that. I used to get the pizza dog.

Oh yeah. Yeah. I think maybe only when I was a kid and I'd eat anything, I probably put like a lot of onions and you know, all that kind of shit on top. Oh really? Cause I feel like as a kid, it's just like ketchup, mustard, nothing else. I think an adolescent. Would you have a chili dog at any point?

Yes. Yeah. But only as an adult. Yeah. As a kid, I don't think I would have had a chili dog. Hot diggity dog diggity. You put cheese on it. You put chili on it.

Is that a song? Yeah. Or is it a poem? What's your corn dog stance? Oh, I love it. My first corn dog, I didn't like, and so I've never liked them. The corn dog that you can get at the P&E in the summer is unreal. It's so good.

It's crunchy. It's soft. You get it with a big thing of mustard. Do you dip it in the mustard? Yeah, I got it. Do you dip it in ketchup too? No, just mustard. Okay.

I always think of corn dog as mustard only, but why wouldn't it be ketchup? I'm limiting my options for now. The first corn dog I had was at camp and no one told me how to eat it. And I just had it on its own and I hated it. So I've never really. You should give it one more try. Okay. I mean, I did have one last year at Disneyland.

And? It was fine. Okay. Okay. I mean, I did have one last year at Disneyland. And it was fine. Okay. Yeah. I'm allergic to corn, but corn dogs are one of the corn products that I do genuinely miss. No, no, no. I really miss them. They are very delicious.

When did you get this corn allergy? Well, 2011, I found out about it. Whew. Yeah. So I've been off corn. Is it anaphylaxis? It's not anaphylaxis, but it's,

uh, just kind of nauseous, dizzy. Mm. Uh, I, my cheeks puff just a little teensy bit, like,

uh, um, maybe sometimes headaches. Um, I feel like this is, you're describing my feelings after every single meal. Yeah. I know.

I know. I don't feel well. When after every single meal. Yeah, I know. I don't feel well. When I got this test. My core is killing me. You disengage. Core disengagement, I would say, is the number one symptom. When I got the initial test, my allergies had gotten. Did they tell you your initials? Because they're CD.

I could have told you that. Hey, let me tell you something. By that logic, every report card I get was an initials test. The allergist, the first time, and I recently got them

checked again after like whatever, 11 or 12 years. And most of my allergies have gotten a lot better and some of them have disappeared um this is a real like allergist allergy test like not a um you know where you it's not like a how do you feel when I say yeah exactly um but how do you feel when I say milk I don't know I I went in, uh, they're like, yeah, you're allergic to, um, cheese, rice, corn, apples, oranges, bananas, rye. Um, there, there was a couple of other things that he goes, look, obviously you're eating

all this stuff. It's not killing you. So, you know, it's not the end of the world. If you like, try not eating it. Right. if you like try not eating it right so i tried it and i was like oh this is what having a body is supposed to feel like and i was like oh you mean you're not supposed to like throw up twice a month and like you're not supposed to be dizzy all the time and it was like your joke about the apple where you're like oh the spicy like i was constantly telling people not to go to sushi restaurants because i was like you know what i went there i got so sick there it's it's they

don't clean it because i got the corn sushi yeah corn sushi down at the japanese deli i'm going sushi on right what for what sushi product are you allergic to rice the rice i'm allergic to rice yeah and so i would go eat 90 pieces of nigiri and then uh go home throw up and be like they must not clean that kitchen or you're just throwing up well Well, call it a night. I've reached the peak of my day. I've grown up. You're not allergic to anything. No, I want a hot dog.

Yeah, what kind of hot dog? A dizzy quarter pound hot dog. A quarter pound? Maybe they all are. No, that feels excessive. A quarter pound hot dog? Especially with the loaded chili and cheese. Well, sure, yeah. Like, how much does that chili weigh?

In the video, it takes a long time for the cheese drizzle. Yeah, it's the kind of cum all over the hot dog. Come on, please. Hey, come on. Hello. Sorry, the acto was quite sensual. That is what I'm referring to. Graham did do a very penis cheese.

Very much of a phallic cheese dispenser. I'm not allergic to anything as far as I know. But I don't want to go to the allergist and find out. Yes, no. I'd rather just feel bad forever. And get stung by a bee and just blow up like a balloon. I have been stung by a bee lately. You have?

Yeah. Oh, nice. Last couple of years. I think maybe once a year the last couple of years. Oh, wow. I haven't got stung by a bee and just blow up like a balloon. I have been stung by a bee lately. You have? Yeah. Oh, nice. Last couple of years. I think maybe once a year the last couple of years. Oh, wow. I haven't got stung by anything. Well, I mean, aside from like mosquitoes and. Yeah.

No, no. And the theater bugs. Yeah, I got it early. There ain't no cure for it. I'll be starring in the new Frasier Live in Boston Yeah I got stung by a bee To be or not to be

Really warming up to this Comedian persona that you've created Yeah He's half Dennis Miller half Seinfeld A lot of head bubble It's mostly in the head bubble um anyway so this stuck in my head all day long it's the best it is a great song i hope it reaches the uh who you know goes down in the annals of canadian jingle hood oh yeah the junos were just this week so you can

yeah how did new york fries do it at the? It wasn't eligible because it just came out. Oh, yeah, so next year. I think maybe this will be like with the Friends theme song and they'll just have to do a full three minute version. Places where you can have a hot dog. Take it to the sink.

Places you can have it. The sink. fully loaded with delicious toppings when now i wonder if new york fries has learned some about fries that we're all you know gonna find out if there's like a potato blight or something like that. Like, you know, who at New York Fries was like, wait, gentlemen, we need a hot dog focused jingle. Yeah. I want no mention of fries, but there will be no fries visible in the advertisement.

I've never seen another New York Fries commercial. No. Even the one with James Hartnett, I think is a hot dog. Hot dog I've never seen Another New York Fries commercial No It's true Even the one with James Hartnett I think is a hot dog Oh I'm eating fries Yeah New York fries

Delicious Wasn't it their thing Like different salts Different flavors of salt I mean they had All kinds of dressed fries Like you could get Fries and gravy

Fries Chili fries Chili fries If you want poutine With thick black gravy yeah get on down there a fully loaded black gravy um do you guys watch the junior awards no but i watched the clip of the uh the naked lady who got on stage with the protest stuff right protest avril lavigne and then avril lavigne told her to get the fuck off the stage yeah yeah see you later boy protest stuff right now. To protest Avril Lavigne. And then Avril Lavigne told her to get the fuck off the stage.

Yeah. Yeah. See you later, boy. Yeah, that's all I want. What was she protesting? I think land acknowledgements or something of that, some sort of. She was against land acknowledgements? Yes.

She was like, enough's enough. Yeah. Check out these tits. And when's the last shirtless protest? That feels like a throwback. Yeah. I feel like there have been a few lately. Hot dog jingle of protesting. Yeah.

All you know who won the Juno His past guest John Doerr John Doerr Yeah For best comedy album Yeah Best contemporary He went and actually swept the Junos

Best rap album Best spiritual Yeah He beat out Drake He beat out The Weeknd Oh man So what's going on with you? Well I feel like i had to do it on a hot dog i do kind of feel like i want a hot dog a chili cheese hot dog is that what the next one is what

would be the vegetarian options at new york fry you get veggie chili veggie chili on a meat hot sure yeah they could just take the hot dog out and just fill up a bun with a bunch of crazy crap And I think the fries are fairly Meat free I wonder if they even have fries I feel like hot dogs are like one of the first to go Yeah you can do a veggie one Yeah that's true They were kind of the OG fake meat

In North America You don't know what's in a hot dog anyway Yeah I'm going to be honest with you There wasn't a lot of meat in the situation in North America. It was like, yeah, that you don't know what's in a hot dog anyway. Yeah. I'm going to be honest with you. There wasn't a lot of meat in the situation to begin with. Yeah, can we do this without meat? Yeah, we can do it without meat.

I won't go into details, but this character is having some sort of problem. This character uses all the breath for every sentence. The sentence doesn't end until I run out of breath. This is the guy who

owns MeatCute. Yeah, we could do a hot dog without meat. Oh, man. No, I did. I want to do a bit of cultural homework. Appropriation.

Oh, appropriation. And you won't guess where I'm headed with this. That's why he's topless. Take more land, it says. Oh, I went and saw Avatar. Oh, that is cultural. I felt like I had to just have that bit of knowledge in my head, what it looked like and what the deal was. You're talking about Avatar, too, the way of water. That is correct.

And what I have heard, the reviews I've heard is that it's actually quite good. It, the thing I was going to it, I was like, I was like, I don't want to go. I don't want to go. Stop talking to another mom. This movie is the opposite of a hot dog for me. Yeah. It's, I don't want it. Yeah.

I don't, I didn't want to go but i felt like i should and in the first couple minutes i was like this is gonna suck and it was awesome it kicked ass it was like uh seeing it in 3d it's shot entirely for 3d like everything in it i don't think it was shot there's like four frames of real people in it well that's true yeah that's a good call um but yeah it totally uh there's nothing like i haven't seen anything like it so okay yeah so it's worth seeing yeah it's like it's kind of the equivalent to like um you know a disney ride that has you know it's like there's stuff coming out and it's yeah it's quite i didn't want to see it in the theater yes yeah you wouldn't get much out of it otherwise no i went and saw um because i don't love 3d movies but we took uh josephine to see um if you wanted to feel dizzy you just uh you know

eat a big thing of rice or a loaded down hot dog uh we went and saw puss in boots uh the last wish yeah and it was incredible yeah like it was in 3d yeah so not only did it look really neat and i don't typically enjoy 3d and i still generally my preference is to see just kind of a conventional movie but it was it was super neat to see in 3d but the script for that movie was incredible like it was oh yeah so good that's the opposite of avatar like the script you don't it was so amazing to watch but like i was talking to somebody yesterday and he was like do you have to know that the first one i was like absolutely not you can come in at the 20 minute mark and still figure it out when you leave you won't know the second one yeah animals on home planet good human beings in giant tanks bad yeah like they even they don't even try to do a plot it's just yeah anyways i

was shocked you were shocked that you liked it yeah and and it didn't feel like that long but you know how they uh uh, they said when the first one came out, there were people that had this breakdown and they couldn't live in that world. Right. Right. I could get it. I could see like if you, if you were kind of like a little, uh, off about being in society

as it is like that would you do that? Oh no, I want to live in that. Perfect. Beautiful. I was, uh, I was talking to my friend who saw, uh, Akira. Oh yeah. And that's like such a perfect world that you want to live in. Well, I haven't seen it, but it was playing at the Rio.

And, uh, my friend said that this, the, uh, someone walking, you know, uh, walking up there, I don't know if they were even standing, but someone like fell, like collapsed in the movie, like fainted. Oh. And, um, and they said, or my friend said it was like, uh, you know, it's a really kind of like gory movie. Yeah. And I was like, I'm sure they weren't just on drugs. I think everyone that goes to see a movie at the Rio is just on drugs. I know they used to do that.

Like with movies, they would have somebody come in and make a heart attack so that the reviewers would be like, during the screening of it. That's what New York Fries does with food reviewers. They have someone in the food court. And then somebody does? Pretend to have a heart attack. That's not good for business. I just ate three of the hot dogs. They're fully loaded with delicious toppings now!

Now I go to my grave, fully loaded with sin! I want to see it. Yeah, I think. Like, if you do want to see it Just go in the theater Because like there would be Very little I mean it's still beautiful

But that's how you want to see it Yeah And that's why I was like This is homework I got to do it before It gets out of theaters And That's how I felt about Top Gun

And I never did You I never saw Top Gun Yeah I felt like I should have seen it But This This is also proof I don't know how many times I have to discount James Cameron before I felt like I should have seen it. But this is also proof. I don't know how many times I have to discount James Cameron before I'm like,

every movie he's made is amazing. Yeah. Like, why do I doubt him for even two seconds? He's like, great. He's one of those guys where like, I mean, I don't have his IMDb out in front of me. I'm not Dave Chumkine. But I think that... Just tappingDB out in front of me. I'm not Dave Chumkine. But I think the... Just tapping on the old phone arena.

I don't know why people turn off the haptics. I think the closest thing he's made to a stinker would be True Lies. Yeah. And that is not the best of his... But it's not by any stretch of an unwatchable movie. No, and like made millions upon millions of dollars.

I think maybe I haven't seen The Abyss. Oh, that might be the closest to a stink. Oh, is it? Okay. Yeah, it's a little pokey. Well, I haven't seen

any of his movies. It's a miss. You've seen Terminator 2. I've seen Terminator 2 and I've seen Aliens. Yeah. And then I saw Terminator 1. Never, not Titanic? Not Titanic've seen aliens yeah and then i saw terminator 1 not

titanic not terminator 1 i saw terminator 1 probably 20 years after i saw terminator 2 and and the thing that like i was amazed by was and kind of in admiration of was like this guy just remade his own movie now that the technology was there yeah to make the movie like it's it's and he doesn't even and i almost kind of admired it more like that he didn't try to go like okay what's the sequel what's the extension of this world it's just like okay now i can melt a guy yeah yeah so i'm gonna do the same movie uh here's how little impact avatar had on me i was like yeah i've seen uh i've seen terminator 2 i've seen aliens that's it yeah yeah oh i haven't seen alien aliens but he made both right no it's an alien

oh right oh that's right and the the urban legend i don't think it's true but uh he went into a meeting with the producers and he wrote on a whiteboard alien and then it asked there was a dollar sign and like oh they were like yes perfect i mean that never happened but but it's a good piece i have seen a movie that he made oh man what is it called it's like and it's one of those like it's like a roger corman movie and james uh john sales wrote the script and it's like it's like a remake of um seven samurai but in space and it's like this like b movie and b is, but it's written by John sales. Yeah. And, and, um,

James Cameron, like before he worked on anything else, he did like, I don't know the sets or the special effects. Like he worked on it. It's like these two dudes who go on to be these, like, cause Roger Corman was like,

is it called battle beyond the stars? That's the one. Yeah. That's the one. Yeah, that's the one. And you know when you're watching a bad. Oh, it's directed by Murakami. Jimmy T. Murakami. But when you're watching like a bad movie that has the bones of greatness. Yeah. Like that's what that movie's like. Yeah. Where you're just like this is totally terrible

they can't afford any good actors except they've got the guy from A-Team the old guy Hannibal George Pappard George Pappard George Pappard is like the biggest name in the movie

he plays this like good redneck pilot who kind of gets brought in as like one of the mercenaries. Like he. Yeah. He has a Confederate flag bumper sticker on his spaceship. Oh, it's like, I mean, because it's John Sayles, that's like to signal who this guy is like it's anyway but it's it's like you're watching that and you're like oh wow this is like um speaking of boardwalk ember boardwalk empire because they said boardwalk empire is kind of like muppet babies for mobsters

because it's like um young al capone young lucky luano, young Meyer Lansky. You're like kind of watching baby, uh, Muppet babies of, of like these, these future great filmmakers. Right. But it's, yeah,

it was, it was, it's pretty neat. I mean, it's just like a seven samurai star Wars rip off. Um, but it's, yeah.

And total cash grab. Yeah. But you see like, and I grabbed so much cash. That's why we're, people are still talking about it today. Yeah. Battle beyond the stars are still talking about it today. Battle beyond the stars.

Sort of a star war. Yeah. Battle of the network stars. With, you know, we're going to have... Liberace. No, not Liberace. We have Malcolm Jamal Warner versus... Versus Liberace. Versus Liberace.

I remember that. Yes. And what Versus Liberace. Versus Liberace. I remember that. Yes. And what network with Liberace? Late Night with Liberace. Late Night. Tonight's musical guest, Liberace. It's me again. He did the Chevy Chase thing where he would turn over and play the keyboard.

Liberace was his own band leader. And I don't mean that euphemistically. Let's just say he's his own band leader and i don't mean that euphemistically let's just say he's his own band leader okay but are you master of your domain i'm my own band um should we move on to a little talk about max fun drive yeah take a seat charlie he's standing up this whole time. Here I go. Okay. Hi there. Okay.

Hi there. Yeah. It's another Max Fun Drive break. This is the last time we're going to break character. Yeah. The rest of the time, Dave and I are Kabuki clowns. You sure about that? I'm not sure about anything.

clowns and you sure about that i'm not sure about anything uh well uh it is our great privilege as joe pesci said when he won an oscar yes yeah short acceptance speech fantastic it is our great privilege to make this show for you uh and the show is supported by you and one of the great things about the max fun drive and having supporters is we get to make this bonus content. We make I guess like 30 bonus episodes a year? Yeah. Is the math right on that?

Yeah, maybe a little more. Think a little more. And we're very lucky to be able to do that. We've discovered all these fun ways to interact with each other uh via zoom yeah we like uh we're having the time of our lives we hope that you are also enjoying our fun fun times and uh it's great it's just great to have you along for the ride because uh with if we didn't we'd just be putting these dispatches out into space, hoping that somebody would respond.

So here's what's happening. We're going to tell you about the gifts that you can get if you join Maximum Fun or if you upgrade your current membership. If you are a current member, you're not going to upgrade. Thank you. We appreciate all you do for us. We understand that that works for you. We get it. We get it.

Yeah. You got what you want. You got what you wanted. And honestly, if we get it, if we could reach more people at the $5 level and get our bonus episodes out to as many people as possible, we'd be thrilled. Absolutely.

This is, uh, like, like we were saying, it's so much fun to do this um and yeah we want you to hear it um so that's five bucks at the five dollar level you get at least well let's not say at least but about two to three episodes bonus episodes from us every month plus bonus content from every other show. Some do one a year.

Some do one a month. It depends on the show. Yeah. And you can now, you can pick and choose which bonus content shows up in your feed over at maximumfund.org slash join. Now, the $10 level. maximumfund.org slash join. Now, the $10 level. If you decide to become an upgrading member at $10

a month or a new member at $10 a month, you get the bonus content. You get the free bonus content. Not free. You're paying for it. Oh, he's lived up there. He accidentally said it's free, so it's free now. Yeah, you get the bonus

content. You get a letterpress maximum fund membership. Remember in American Psycho when they're all about the membership cards or their business cards? I don't think they're membership cards. Member of the Psycho Club, are you? Show me. Chainsaw of the month.

Ooh, lucky. His is better than mine. I'm going to cram a cat into an atm machine or whatever so you get the bonus content you get that card a letterpress max fund membership card uh patrick bateman himself will be so jealous of your card yeah and that's where you want to be you want to make enemies with him yes and then at ten dollars a month you also get one of 37 re-stickable stickers and these stickers they're individualized to the show uh one of the things that we do for bonus content is we talk about every episode of

mr bean uh and our re-stickable sticker this time around is a picture of mr bean's green car and it's a yellowy green there's some debate about it we went back and forth over the right color on these and i think we settled in a good spot yeah absolutely and it says being there done that it's a little it's a mini and it's got his signature umlock on the door. Yeah. And above it, it says, been there, done that. If you have a sticker of a three-wheeled car, you can put that near it and make it like it's knocking it out of its spot. That's something you can do with your action figure stickers later. At the $20 level, you can get the maximum fun rocket hat which is uh an embroidered eco-friendly

cap that has an adjustable back and has the max fun drive rocket logo on the front you know i'm loving that loving a hat uh it's great for keeping the sun out of your eyes uh so you can catch fly balls oh yeah yeah that's true i am always catching balls and it's tripping balls. Then I'm catching balls. Okay. Then I'm attending a ball and, uh, and then give me four more.

We're talking about Lucille ball on the beach ball. Um, using a ballpoint pen. And, um, and are you, you go to the club? Are you balling?

Yes. I'm balling. Yes. There we go. We did it. And then later you're very sad and you're you bawling? Yes. I'm bawling. Yes. There we go. We did it. And then later you're very sad and you're bawling with a W. Yeah. Hell yeah.

So that's that or at $20 a month. Oh, also at $20 a month, you get the, all the $10 stuff, the sticker, the bonus content, the membership card,

membership card, and a rocket hat. Or if you don't want a rocket hat you can get the max fun culinary kit which is a max fun family cookbook featuring recipes thoughtfully submitted uh from your favorite max fun shows and a jar of bespoke maximum flavor spice blend oh yeah so you know you can rub it in yeah rub it in rub it in yeah that crossed my mind as well uh i think i might do this on one of my signature beer can chickens yes yeah so packed with flavor um yeah it's uh it's uh like a i haven't smelled it myself but does it smell nice does it smell like a like a fun adventure

for your mouth graham i received this in the mail you think i opened it and smelled it i did not but i you know what i saw the words paprika i think i saw onion powder on there hell yeah i have an idea this smells pretty nice yeah you're right yeah don't spoil it for yourself just yeah i kind of want to surprise myself um at 35 there's this amazing apron at uh 50 a month there's more at 100 a month there's more you can see all the gifts available at maximumfun.org join uh but uh yeah this is the last time we're gonna have a break about it and yeah uh i might have a breakdown about it yeah we're gonna go cry

yeah we're gonna go ball yeah that's right will you please join us as a member yeah and uh we very much appreciate everybody who does uh you uh you enable us to do the show you're enabling time you're enablers that's right yeah it's uh it's... It's become a problem. Yeah, we're like bad people and you're enabling us. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So if you don't, we're going to be even worse, you know? Yeah, because we're bad people, as I mentioned before. So head over to MaximumFun.org slash join. And do you want to do some overheards?

I would love to. Overheard. Now it's time for some overheard. Is this a new segment? It is a new segment. And check this out. Post-pandemic. It seems there was a hot dog commercial.

That I oversaw it's delicious it sounded a little something like this I want a hot dog that would be something Blink-182 would think of I mean if Sum 41, Blink-182, any of the number bands boys to men you too you be 40 Blink-182, any of the number bands. The number bands. Boys to men. Yeah.

You too. You be 40. Yeah, Ben folds five. 30-odd foot of grunt. I'm trying to think of I know there's the Dave Clark Yeah haircut 100 100 through 1000

Two live crews Yes I'm gonna fuck a hot dog Now we always like to start The overheard segment with the guests. Yeah. Charlie, do you have one? Yeah. I kind of have, um, a minor overseen and then I have an overheard, but it was said to me.

Is that okay? Okay. Yeah. So, um, my overseen was, uh, yesterday actually, and that's why I thought it would be good because it's fresh. Um, I was, I was at the dog park and I saw quite a lot of pathos in this, but I, uh, was sitting down on a bench and, um, I saw one dog pushed over another dog, like, and the dog kind of whimpered and he pushed this dog onto the ground and

the dog that got pushed down on the ground was three legged. I was like, oh my goodness. that's like, that's really not fair or kind of it. And then I realized that the pushing dog was also three-legged. I was like, well, yeah, exactly. And then I just started saying, I want a three like a dog. But the overheard that was sort of spoken to me, so not strictly speaking overheard, was when we were in the maternity ward. What's this?

What for? Why were you in the maternity ward? So my wife loves Julius Caesar. And we were. Pizza pizza. We were at the hospital and there's sinks in the room where you're staying, but you're

not really supposed to drink the water from this. It's just like for washing your hands and stuff. There's a machine that has water and ice. For baptizing the baby. It's just there's a baptismal font. Yeah, do you think when they have uh baptized water they just have like one guy do the whole tank the holy holified the whole water and then it gets sent

out in trucks across the country yeah he just uh he uh blesses the fleet yeah so so uh, I was going to get a water for, for Kara and I, and, um, I, you know, it's, it's still pandemic. Right. And, uh, uh, and, um, in the hospital, that still means like you're fully, whenever you're not in just your own space, uh, you're, you gotta be masked up. you gotta be masked up but as you know like dave when when you have a newborn you're supposed to be in as little clothing as possible like you're supposed to be doing like all skin to skin contact with the baby and and they're supposed to get to know your smells and your everything so like um i'm just wearing shorts and so uh so i'm going as i go to get the um uh water i put on a t-shirt i put on the mask and then i go to get the water, I put on a t-shirt, I put on the mask, and then I go to get the water. I don't have any shoes or socks.

And this nurse walks by me and she goes, oh, you're not wearing any shoes. She goes, you're in bare feet. And I said, oh, yes, sorry. You know, and I'm on like three hours of sleep in two days. I go, oh, yeah, sorry. I'm just going to get some water but yeah you're right she goes yeah i mean it's still it's a hospital corridor and i said oh yeah no you're right you're right i'm sorry and she goes do you have shoes

and literally go down to the morgue and see if you're fine yeah for six weeks I've just been Ruing the fact that I didn't have the presence of mind to say No ma'am, I do not So, that's my And this is literally when we got back from the hospital That was the only story Kara wanted me to tell anybody She kept setting that up Tell them about your shoes from the hospital that was the only story Kara wanted me to tell anybody. She kept setting that up. Yeah.

Tell them about your shoes. And you'll tell it to your son every birthday. Yes. I was watching the red carpet at the Oscars. Champagne carpet. That's right, it was.

And they had... Because it's from the Champagne region of France. It was so red. Yeah. Hell it's from the Champagne region. It was so red as hell itself. But they were talking to Questlove. And they were going through his outfit. And he's like, and you're wearing Crocs.

And he was like, yeah, you know, after the pandemic, we're taking things easy. Normally, I'd be the guy to suffer through a whole show in you know Jordans I'm pretty sure there's women in high heels here doesn't he always wear Crocs I thought that was

like one of his signature they do like fancy he's the non-problematic Mario Batali they found a new

face of Crocs why wouldn't Mario Batali do I still like his recipes free Batali. They found a new face of the crop. Why wouldn't Mario Batali do? I still like his recipes. Yeah, free Batali. Dave, do you have an overheard? Yeah, I have an overheard, yes. Okay, so yesterday, this kind of relates a little bit to our James Cameron conversation, a little bit to our 3D conversation.

We were at Granville Island Kids Market yesterday. Where I just dropped off Josephine before coming here to play with the other of the three Margot, Josephine,

Thea, the three 2014 7 pound 7 ounce comedy daughters. Wow. the three 2014 seven pound seven ounce comedy daughters wow Vancouver comedy daughters anyway a lot of qualifiers

no but every one of those qualifiers makes it more impressive so I was they have I took them and we did like there's like gambling. Yes. Down at the kids market.

There kind of is. It's, they have like Chuck E. Cheese style. Oh yeah. Yeah. Uh, games and you get tickets and you win, you can cash in your $20 worth of games for three cents worth of crap. The ratio is unreal yeah it makes chuggie cheese look like like some sort of charitable organization but then afterwards we'd seen these you know we go maybe every six months

yeah the kids market and we see the we've seen this uh it's kind of like a mall for kids basically. There's like kids stores, there's like a magic shop and there's one kiosk that is VR. Virtual reality. Oh, that's what that stands for. And there's just a bunch of like egg shaped pods that you sit in and you put a mask on and the kids have always asked to do it and

they were too small before and then there was like covid for so long that i was like well i don't want you putting anything on your face yeah yeah now i'm now i'm uh i guess i'm sort of an anti-vaxxer because i let my kids do this three years into a pandemic i The only reality I live in is virtual, so I'm fine. And they have, the guy explained it to me. He was a French guy. I don't think French Canadian. I think French French. And he's saying you- He's from the Champagne League.

Yes. And he said, I was like, how does it work? He said, well, your kids, they can get, they can either do one interactive game where you're shooting stuff, or you can do two of just sort of experience things where you're on a roller coaster. Oh, cool. And I was worried that my kids would be like, I never want to leave this world.

So the kids are Navi now. But they have, nothing is like branded. Like they've got like, he'll show you like they have this printout of all the games you could do. Right. And none of them are like, you know, like famous things. Right. They're all just like things you've never heard of. So it's not like the back to the future.

Yeah, exactly. Or Minecraft. Yeah. There's something that looks a lot like Minecraft. Right. But I don't think it's not like the back to the future yeah exactly or minecraft yeah there's something that looks a lot like minecraft right but i don't think it's minecraft your arts it's unrendered world um and then but so this french guy my kids did the experience once but this little eight-year-old boy was there and he wanted to do uh the ones where you're shooting stuff and uh so he was very nice he's good with kids and he's a french guy and just this is what he said he said so uh what kind would you like to shoot zombies and mummies or would you like to shoot spaceships or sharks or would you like to shoot Terminators,

future Terminators? Uh-huh. Okay, future Terminators. And I don't think this eight-year-old boy knows what a present-day Terminator is. That's so sweet.

Yeah. Josephine did virtual reality for her birthday and the kids who worked there could not have been sweeter so i don't know if there's something about virtual reality that just brings out these people who are really good with kids yeah poppy has uh they like they she's six so they put a the mask on her and they have like a towel that they put around the back to like make the head bigger.

Yeah. But her head is bigger than Margo's. Like she's, she's very, she's got a big head, small kid with a big head and a little neck, like a tiny neck.

So her head was bouncing around. Yeah. And the mask did come off in the end. But they loved it. She was doing the virtual Dennis Miller. Yeah, exactly. But they absolutely loved it.

Oh, that's awesome. Highlight of their life. Yeah, that's the Little Mountain Gallery's new space was supposed to be a VR. Oh, right. A Brazil-themed VR. A Brazilian VR. Yeah, you can vote for lula um do you have an overheard my good sir i have an overseen and you know how once in a while you

just see somebody and you're like oh you're the coolest people the coolest person yeah yeah you're the coolest um i was on the train there's a young woman wearing uh like cool shorts converse sneakers and a really like really unraveling garfield sweater and i was like oh man this this rules and one of the only one that had a speech bubble came out and it said yo and i was like well that's not it's not canon yeah that's not his vibe i guess it's not official merchandise yeah yo i want lasagna a juicy eight pound lasagna see if that garfield place in toronto had had a catch oh man carfield yo yo yeah carfield isn't bugs buddy

yeah he's not he's not rocky yeah and he was peeing on yodi on yodi that's what it was it was short for yodi yeah short for yodi well stepped on my own punchline. He was peeing on Yodi. I hope you're pleased with yourself. Yeah, buzzy phone man. Buzzy phone man. Hello, I'm buzzy phone man. We're getting used to the space. Graham's phone makes the microphone buzz.

But okay, if I talk over here is it catching up? well you can be a little closer you should get your mouth close to the microphone and the phone okay there we go first one

in addition to overheards that are our own yeah we also enjoy written in overheards that are our own. Yeah. We also enjoy, uh, written in overheards. If you want to send one into us, you can send it into SPY at maximumfund.org. And, uh, this first one is from Kirsten from Kitchener, Ontario. No, she's not Kirsten.

Oh yeah, that's Kirsten. Yeah. Good eye. It might be the same. Uh, this is overseen in Kitchener, a guy commuting to work via unicycle in a snowstorm. Wow. That is commitment. Yeah.

To be in Kitchener's eccentric. Yeah. He must have snow tires. Or snow tire. He's got chains. Snow tire. Snow tire. He's trying to get a deal on one set of chains.

They only sell them in fours and he's like, there must be a cast off here that you can give me just one chain. You see people biking in the snow here. They're slipping around and they're so committed to biking they don't care. They're cooler

than the rest of us. Simple fact. I saw a couple of I saw a couple of snow bikes this year yeah what if it like could a unicycle have something like

one of those things that people put on skis so they can walk up in the skins oh I don't know like a

like a ski skin for a unicycle is this my fortune have I just stumbled onto my fortune dragons thank you for having me here today

this was recorded on March 15th so this dated okay yeah yeah i don't want anyone stealing ski skins for unicycles yeah yeah dragons have you ever been trying to climb a mountain in skis no sorry on your unicycle in the snow no we've all been trying to get to work in Kitchener. Unicycle, it's the best way to travel. Kitchener. Yeah. Have you seen the, there's like a lot of posters on trains and inside of buses for move to Prince George?

No. But it just says like, it says that. Move to Prince George. Move to Prince George. You, hey you. Yeah. Get out of Stinksville and get up here. Slightly less. Yeah. Um, yeah.

If you got, you guys have both been to Prince George, right? I don't think so. I, the coldest I ever was in my life was in Prince George. And I think it was a combination of that. It was actually quite cold, but also this, that I was not prepared for. Yeah. Like, and I was staying two blocks from where the show was and I was, uh, but that was a wild night because I performed and there was, I was getting heckled by

boilermakers, like not the drink, but literal boilermakers, uh, for the whole set. And I kind of had to like try disciplining them during the set. And then I, you know, you got a free meal with this show and I'm sitting in the back in front of this gray brick wall waiting for my meal. And one of the boiler makers walks by on his way to the bathroom and goes

and looks at me and goes, Oh, well, Oh, don't worry. I'll be right back. And he goes to the bathroom. And I was like,

should I run out of this place? Like, should I leave? Am I going to be splattered all over run out of this place like should i leave am i gonna be splattered all over the back of this wall yeah yeah and then he came on he's like oh that was so much fun man whatever like but while he was gone i was like i think i might die in first george yeah i uh did a show there and after the show a woman who was in the audience was like hey i'll give you a ride back to the hotel and i was like oh, oh, no, that's fine. I'm fine to just walk. And she's like, I insist on giving you a ride.

And I was like. There's some guys in the parking lot who want to kill you. She said, I don't want to get attacked by a bear. Oh. And I was like, oh, okay. You were being quite honestly kind. It's okay. I've doused myself with wolf piss.

Is that a thing? I don't know. It's okay. Garfield pissed all over me before I came out on stage. Yo, check this out. It's a thing to get coyote or wolf urine to keep deer away from your plants. Oh, right. Yeah.

Yeah. Because I was going to say you try to attract deer with deer piss. Yeah. But I guess trying. Deer piss. Yeah. When it comes to going to the bathroom, you're number one. Oh, man.

That was a perfect. That is what we call sticking the landing. My fan letter to my pee i stand my p uh this next one comes from mike in louisville you're in my good books um have you guys ever heard of the musical you're in town yeah yeah right right oh i didn't know it was a play on words yeah until you just said it that way it's it is it's literally about the lack of access to bathrooms that's kind of like a dystopian future where you can't yeah yeah huh anyways you guys

heard of hamilton literally about the access to Alexander Hamilton. My son says Do you think what's his name who wrote Hamilton? Lin-Manuel Miranda. Do you think he ever gets Google alerts for news about

Hamilton, Ontario? Probably. Like that's got to be like, has he figured it out right now? For a while, I was way above Hamilton, Ontario in the Google stuff. And now it's kind of evened out.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like, uh, musical, musical, musical that I can get the shooting musical, musical steel mill. Uh, whenever I get Google alerts, it's, uh graham clark and it's either soccer player yeah uh violinist graham clark or international hacker graham clark he comes up he comes up a lot international he's like a kid that hacked into some nice giant corporation wow yeah um so you know it's a good good company yeah yeah with it's usually true. It'll just be like a Cabo Cua real estate agent. Nobody beats Charlie.

No. Uh, my son says to my daughter, you have to stick up. You have a stick up your butt. My daughter then replied, Oh yeah. Well,

you have two pumpkins up your butt. My son, the one upper again says you have a hundred trees up your butt and you're the cause of deforestation just a hundred trees though trees up your butt that's the whole deforestation we were 100 trees short this year guys no oxygen for anybody yeah sorry to say we came up short guys but uh take your last breath but like with kids you never know like you'll use a an idiom and and they'll be hearing it and they have no sense of like when i was a kid you know when people say hey you got a match yeah my ass your face i've never heard that really yeah no you've heard that

yeah i've heard it and I think as an adult more. Oh, okay. Well, like it was a thing, you know, because like if somebody had a smoke and you go, hey, what, you got a match? Yeah, my ass, your face, meaning they're a perfect match for each other. When I was a kid, I thought, ha ha, I'm going to rub your face on my butt until it makes a fire. And that's how you'll light your cigarette. it makes a fire and that's how you'll light your cigarette so like kids hear these like uh common you know phrases or whatever that we take for granted i still don't know what your ass is

grass means yeah uh well it doesn't make any sense without and i'm a lawnmower at least even then yeah are you gonna yeah isn't that good i'm gonna cut you down to size but ass wise but like only your ass is grass because sometimes i guess it's syne going to cut you down to size. But ass-wise? Ass-wise. But only your ass is great. Because sometimes, I guess it's synecdoche. You refer to someone as, your ass is mine. Yeah, yeah. What is that word? Synecdoche.

Synecdoche is when the part takes the place of the whole. Oh, okay. What's metonymy? I don't know, dear. What's Chinese democracy? It's like probably the fifth best Guns N' Roses album Is that including the spaghetti incident? Yeah

Okay No it doesn't include I think I can put spaghetti higher than Chinese democracy Have you done three? I know I've done two Oh my gosh we're having so much fun I was paying for

This is from Alicia Kay in Chicago. I was paying for Alicia Keys in New York. Yeah, that's right. Why is she in Chicago? Maybe she's doing a residency somewhere. Yeah. At second city.

Noted improviser. Yeah. Alicia Keys. She kind of, she's, she puts her hands behind someone from the audience and plays the piano. Yeah. She's writing to stop podcasting yourself to ask for an occupation.

A famous singer. Piano player. It was paying for a parking ticket on the city of Chicago's website today. And it served me the best captcha I've ever seen. You guys know captcha? Yeah, that's what you put on a hot dog. Well, that's how they pronounce captcha in Chicago.

Hey, captcha this on your phone. Good accent. Captcha this on your camera. Okay, keep it up. Keep working on it. He was in New York for a while. I need a bit more time. Yeah, no, sorry, more like this. So it's down, down nasal.

Hey, capture this. Yeah, no, maybe it's more Brooklyn. Because, no, yeah. Chicago would be like, capture. Capture this. Yeah, that's right. Capture this. Yeah, okay.

Capture. Oh, oh, capture. Huh? Hey, I'm trying to pay for this Brooklyn parking ticket. And look at the capture. That's a little Italian, doesn't it? Could you just have the, Alicia, could you write it in again and say you're from Brooklyn? It would really help Charlie out.

Yeah, I mean, this is good that we're able to workshop it, I think. No bad ideas. You're part of it, too. I mean, that's part of the problem no chicago's not working alicia right from from newfoundland or scotland someplace where i can for sure do the newfoundland capture yeah yeah do newfoundland capture Uh. What? Oh, sweet tundra and Jesus.

I was doing a capture. No, why do I keep saying capture? I was doing a capture, and they gave me. No, I can't believe. Click on every panel that has card, and there were no card in any panel. Pretty good. you nailed it is sweet tundering jesus how you get into it yeah yeah it's kind of the way you kind of roll into the it's like the way the way a gymnast would run into a cartwheel that's how i run into a sweet owner in jesus here we go oh my gosh son of a critch is! So, she's paying a parking ticket.

Paying a parking ticket in St. John's. And the captcha said, please click each image containing a dog wearing sunglasses. Oh, wow! And the picture's pretty good. Because it's, like, there you go. Oh, yeah. What are we? Yeah. There's, they're all dogs except for there's a couple that are not with sunglasses.

Oh, that almost looks like they're like AI generated. They are. Don't you think? Oh yeah. I don't think those are real dogs. Yeah. No, I mean that one on the bottom left for sure is not. Look at that.

That's a live action Odie. If I ever saw one of them's being beat on anyways cool capture i don't think i've ever had a cool no that is no never mine's always just yeah like traffic light traffic light car did they on purpose have one panel that only has a little bit of the thing and so that's what's supposed to show you that you're not a robot. Yeah. I don't know. Cause it'll be like everything with a fire hydrant and there'll be just the

tiniest little tip of the fire hydrant in one of the panels. And I always click that. And I figured that's what they're trying to make me. I always get like, you click on every square that has Bill Pullman, but some of them are Bill Paxton. Yes. Some of the most difficult captions ever made.

Who are the two I'm getting mixed up now? Are Anna Torv and Carrie Coon? I don't know who either of those people are. Thank you for saying that. Yeah, well, you've seen them. I don't know who any famous people are. No. Lee Harvey Oswald.

That's my last celebrity. I am working part-time as a radio DJ. These are Anna Torv and Carrie Coon. Oh yeah, I could see getting confused there. She's from Fargo. She was in Fargo. Isn't one of those Jessica Beale? from Fargo. She was in Fargo. Isn't one of those Jessica Beal?

Anyway, you're working at a radio station? Oh, and I do as my sign-off bit is I say happy birthday to I go on a celebrity website and see how many celebrities it takes for me to find one that I know. It's

shocking. It's every time there's like 10 people. It's 10 influencers and then Estelle Getty. Happy 43rd birthday. 43rd birthday of your death. In addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls. if you want to call

us our phone number is 1-844-779-7631 that's one ugh spy pod one like these people have hello dave graham and wonderful guest this is melanie from bernadette dc coming at you with an overheard i was in vancouver over the weekend at a very trendy store on Main Street when I was passed by two 20-something friends. One of them was in a really good mood and said to her other friend, it's like I finally understand what the people who wrote the Lego movie song

were trying to say. And her friend, who was in a less good mood, responded, everything is awesome. Ugh. Off I go. I think I missed part of that. The song is everything is awesome. Everything is awesome.

And the one person had finally gained insight into that. Right. And the other one disagreed. The other one disagreed. I feel like because I grew up in Burnaby, I'm interpreting for you. Yes. Do the Burnaby, I'm interpreting for you. Yes, yes. Do the Burnaby accent. Sweet, tundering Jesus.

Sweet, tundering Metrotown mall. Sweet, tundering Metrotown. Holy orange Julius. That's what we say. The Captcha. The Captcha only had the pictures of Swan Guard Stadium. In the name of Michael J. Fox. As somebody who's not spent a lot of time

at Burnaby, is it mostly just residential or is there a downtown Burnaby? Here's your situation. Alright. I'm legally obligated yeah I do they leave the keys to anything yes oh I forget that it's a Porsche would they mind uh no yeah well parents just don't understand. Okay. Of course. So, uh, North Burnaby, uh, is, uh, especially

Northeast Burnaby is a little fancier part. Southeast is a little like tougher part. South, uh, you know, it's, it's mostly residential, but the big, um, sort of commercial hubs are in the South Metro town in the south metrotown in the, uh, north, uh,

Brentwood and, uh, Lougheed malls. Yes. And then, uh, on Hastings, uh,

there's a delicious little, uh, soda fountain shop. Yeah. Great for getting like, uh, lime cordial. That's true.

Yeah. And that's where, uh, and so North Burnaby is also a very Italian. Here we go. Here's an accent. You might even say,

you might even say going there on the wrong day is a big no-no. Oh yeah. So it's kind of, there's a strip of Hastings. There's got a bit of a feel of like commercial drive 25, 30 years ago. And, uh, that's your, that's your basic shape of Burnaby and the accent is more or less. And here's your next phone call.

Here's your next phone call. I just saw a truly elderly woman riding one of those hoverboards, like the one with the big wheel in the middle that looks like a skateboard, but with a giant robotic wheel in the middle. I'm sorry. Hi, Dave. Can you give a possible guess? This is Michael at St. Louis, and off I go. guest. This is Michael. It's great. Off I go.

I'm on my way. Bye. It was an elderly woman? An elderly woman. Drone? No. On a hoverboard. On a hoverboard.

Those that you talk about core, people have to have strong core to go on them. When people zip around on them, I just like i'm in awe i don't understand how they can not fall down and could go so fast and to break with it yeah yeah oh still getty from point a to point b that's for sure um i like that we both had a sort of unicycle adjacent to yeah oh. Oh, isn't that so? Yeah. Just someone... And I like that this guy was... Charlie, do you have anything for that? Yeah. Let me go back and...

Did anyone scrimshaw a unicycle? Wouldn't that be fun if I did? I also like that this guy was so excited he forgot to say his name. He just launched right into it. Yeah. I've got the number on my phone. He called as though it were an emergency call.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Maybe he's got a short memory. He's like, I've got the number on my phone. He called as though it were an emergency call. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Maybe he's got a short memory and he's like, I've got to do this before I forget. I'm the memento guy.

Bye. Remind me which one I'm supposed to, who I'm supposed to trust. Never mind. I won't even remember to listen to your show. And here's your

final phone call. Hi, Dave Graham and probable guests. This is Thomas in Seattle calling in with an overheard. I was just at a convenience store down the street and the song Holiday by Madonna was playing over the speakers.

And a man turns and says to his friend, wow, this was the first song I ever heard. Wow. Now my mind is reeling. What's the first song? I don't think it's knowable. No, it would be something your parents sang you. Like if Holiday by Madonna was the first song.

What came out first, Holiday or Holiday Road? Oh, yeah, Holiday Road. My parents used to sing me Wham hits. The greatest of Wham. Yeah, my parents were always like, Wham, wham, wham, wham. And I would spit it up into the saxophone. Yeah.

I mean, everybody remembers the first tape they bought or album they bought. What is the first song that you remember? Like the first pop song. Yeah. My family used to make fun of me because I once said that my favorite song I know. What? You tell me what it is it's walking on soundtrack and now for years ever since they're like oh dave your favorite song's on i love it that's a lovely song though yeah it's just funny that you're part of a family bit that i'm used to it it's part of being the youngest of 10.

Yeah. Um, yeah, I, uh, I think it was, uh, um, girls just want to have fun.

Oh, that's the first song, like pop song. I remember listening to, and I feel like I listened to it on a record with headphones on elementary school or something like that. I mean, the first song that I remember, like kind of deliberately listening to in like a record player situation

was probably the ray parker jr ghostbuster ah yeah but um i also remember uh hearing shawday smooth operator and thinking that she was saying who's got the red eyes like smooth not just smooth who's got the red eyes that's pretty good actually and that's what I thought the lyrics were

and so I thought the song was about a bunny so I was little enough for that to be what I thought and meanwhile the bunny's rubbing his face on your ass starting a fire

it's a match yeah oh man is there another one well we know no no for calls no well

I think that brings us to the end yeah I think so you guys want to go of the show. Yeah, I think so. You guys want to go get hot dogs? Yeah, I don't. You know what I want? I want to find out who's got the red eyes. Because I'm a narc at the end of school.

All of us in a couple minutes, if you know what I mean. That's a California accent. Well, part of us, NorCal, Stokano. Encino-ish. Uh, maybe Encino-ish. Yeah. Yeah.

As sort of my tribute to our Oscar winners. Yeah. Like Pauly Shore. Pauly Shore. Sean Astin. Don't wheeze the juice guy. Yeah. They gotta be hurting a little bit after that.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I watched the whole YouTube video yesterday. I'm ashamed to say this, but about how happy they were. In fact, that's nice. Yeah. Yeah. No, I watched the whole YouTube video yesterday. I'm ashamed to say this, but about how

happy they were. In fact, that's nice. Yeah. Yeah. I don't, I saw that movie. I don't remember his performance exactly.

The, uh, uh, everything, everywhere. Right. Right. Yeah. I don't remember being such a standout performance.

I saw it so long ago, but I was happy to see him win. It was, it was maybe happier than anyone else winning. Yeah. And also it's like the one that you have an investment in because you saw it.

Oh, you saw him in more than one, didn't you? Didn't you see Tar? Yeah, but he wasn't in Tar. That's true. For long. Yeah, exactly. It was a cut scene at the end. I think I saw five of the Best Picture nominees.

Really? Yeah. Wow. In the old days, you would have covered all your bases. Yeah. Oh, yeah. How many other? Ten?

Yeah, well, you saw Avatar. The other Tar. Yeah. Yeah, the Tar for kids. Tar for kids. Man, remember when actual Tar tried that as a slogan? Tar for kids. Cigarettes? Cigarettes a slogan. Tar for kids. Cigarettes.

Cigarettes. They're tar for kids. Well, Charlie, do you have anything you would like to plug? Anything you're working on? You know, if people want to head over to my sub stack, I'm hoping now that things are a little bit more equilibrium has been reached. I'll be publishing

more consistently. We talked about substacks last week. I didn't think to mention yours. I also subscribe to Charlie. You can go to

charliedemers.substack.com You can buy any of my books. Oh, if you're an Audible subscriber, at least in Canada, I don't know if this is the case in the United States, but I imagine it would be if you're an audible subscriber, um, my audio book property values, which I read as well, uh, is, uh, currently included with, uh, their subscription. So you can listen to it, uh, at no Additional charge to what you already pay

When you read your audio book Do you ever go who writes this stuff Did you get that on mic For the 18th time After every chapter I just keep going Clever girl Well thank you so much for being here.

This was such a pleasure. This was so much fun. And thank you, listeners, for being with us during this MaxFunDrive. This is your last time we're going to bug you about it. That's right. Go to MaximumFun.org slash join. You'll get the gifts. You'll get the satisfaction.

You'll get the warm feeling of supporting the show you love. Yeah. And one unicycle skin. A single unicycle skin. Like a skin for skis. For snow skis. I want a ski skin. Everything's coming back.

But yes, thank you all. We love you all. We appreciate that you're listening. We are very lucky to be able to keep making this show. And did you hear any commercials? No, you did not. Well, we heard one for a hot day. Damn it.

But I was going to say, the reason you don't have commercials is because we're listener supported, but I guess I really supported by listeners and New York prize. Oh man. Yeah. Like Dave said, thank you very much for being a part of the podcast.

You know what? Have a treat yourself to a nice beverage right after you stop listening to the podcast. Go have a nice lemonade. Yeah, have a hot dog. Coco, have a hot dog. A fully loaded hot dog. And thank you for listening and take care of one another and come on back next time for another episode

of Stop Podcasting Yourself. MaximumFun.org Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Audience supported.