Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 810 - Jordanne Brown

Episode Date: September 26, 2023

Comedian Jordanne Brown joins us to talk bunny hugs, Arachnophobia, and The Old Spaghetti Factory....

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 810 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who can draw a pretty neat little stick plane. Mr. Dave Shumka. A stick plane, like a stick man would go on.
Starting point is 00:00:35 Yeah, that a stick man would go on. Or anyone on stick vacation too. I don't know. I know, I'm trying to think of stick, stick, Sylvania. Yeah, all I could think of was Easter Island and I was like, well, I would just be the head part of a stick man sticking out of a stick island. Yeah,
Starting point is 00:00:52 I mean, if a stick man goes in a forest, is he even there? Yeah, that's one of those interesting questions from philosophy. Um, yes, I like to draw... If you told me to draw an airplane that, I wouldn't have drawn that and that looks like an airplane. Yeah, I like to draw. I wouldn't, if you told me to draw an airplane, that I wouldn't have drawn that. And that looks like an airplane.
Starting point is 00:01:08 I would have gone from the side. Oh, it's no good at all. But you know, it's an airplane. I know it's an airplane. What are you best at doodling? Doodling for a long time when I was a kid, it was elf. I could doodle a pretty mean elf. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:21 And I actually like several months ago had a dream about the fact that i had that and it was very important that i knew how to do it right and uh when i did it i alicia tobin used to do her show maybe she still does uh come draw with me um it's more of an event now if she does it yeah it's less a monthly show and uh she would get the audience to draw things and one of her favorite topics was your favorite animal eating your favorite food or your favorite animal doing your favorite sport. Yeah. And I would always draw Alf as my favorite animal.
Starting point is 00:01:57 I love it. He's mine too. Our guest here today, first time guest on the podcast, which is always a lot of fun. She has an album out right now called I Can Explain. It's Jordan Brown. Hello. Hello. Hello.
Starting point is 00:02:11 I'm. Hi. How's it going? Good. How are you? I'm good. Good. Excellent.
Starting point is 00:02:17 I love having these headphones on. Do they freak you out? No, I love it. Do you actually love it? No, it's really. I do love it. That's funny because I always have to do one off. So, because then I feel like I'm in outer space.
Starting point is 00:02:29 Why do you? I like that outer space feeling. Okay. It's like, it separates me from my voice and self. Should we get those? Yeah, we all want to be separated from ourselves. Yeah. Should we get those headphones that are like, that have the microphone it like you're a helicopter pilot oh yeah that would be good
Starting point is 00:02:49 yeah have you ever had to do that talking to on a helicopter have you ever had to no have you yeah well on a helicopter they gave me uh earmuff things but i didn't have them oh okay yeah didn't have the voice i they were just assuming nobody on the flight was wanting to talk to me we did a thing at uh when i was producing um this sounds serious where one of the characters was a helicopter pilot and we needed helicopter pilot audio and someone had one of those oh really i think it was like the studio kind for like a cameraman but we had to find the weirdest adapter to record something off of it. And the mind reels of what type of... Just like six pokies.
Starting point is 00:03:33 Yeah, like I have an old radio from my grandfather and the batteries are size R. Wow. Which I don't think you can get size R anymore. That's crazy. Yeah, what's the oldest appliance you have in size R anymore. That's crazy. Yeah. What's the oldest appliance you have in your house? Oh, my house.
Starting point is 00:03:50 Or in your family tree. Your whole family. Your whole life. Everybody can. Yeah. Well, my grandparents, I don't think they have it anymore since they downsized to a condo.
Starting point is 00:03:58 One of the saddest things that happens to everyone, but they. Do you think it's better to live in a giant house? Yeah. With many haunted quarters and so many stairs that are going to get really hard?
Starting point is 00:04:08 Yeah, nice and creepy, creaky. Hard to clear out once something happens. Yeah. What could happen? I'm not sure. I'm not sure.
Starting point is 00:04:17 Something, it did whatever that was, never mind. It happened recently. Oh, I'm sorry for your loss. No, it's good. But they had a big like music machine that played off of cans you guys seen those oh yeah it was like cans that had rigs or
Starting point is 00:04:35 ridges on it oh yeah like um like a player piano kind of thing or like a music box like a music box yeah yeah those are cool like size of a soup can song. And did they have a bunch of the cans? I don't know how many they had. I don't remember. And what kind of songs were there? Like ACDC? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:55 I'm imagining all the songs from an ice cream truck. Yeah, very much ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. I love it. My favorite kind of music. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. I love it. My favorite kind of music. That sounded good, hey? Really good. Did either of you see an ice cream truck this year at all? I feel like I didn't.
Starting point is 00:05:13 I did, but where did I see it? Oh, when I was in Copenhagen, I saw it a couple times. Oh, shit. Okay. International ice cream. International ice cream. Did you see one this summer? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:05:24 I definitely saw the knife guy. Okay. Yes, tell us about this knife guy. did you see one this summer i don't know i definitely saw the knife guy okay yes tell us about this knife guy do you guys have this i let's get to know yeah let's get to know us absolutely i think i know what you mean by the knife guy but um is it someone who like goes he travels around in a van and and sharpens knives yeah and he has a song just like the ice cream man really?
Starting point is 00:05:49 yeah so like is it Mac the Knife? I don't know what that is but yeah it is probably it's probably the most famous knife song yeah
Starting point is 00:05:58 no it's like the same one as the ice cream man is it Cuts Like a Knife by Bryan Adams? could be that yeah or First Cut is the... That's good. These are all good considerations.
Starting point is 00:06:07 Yeah. Does he worry about being stabbed? He worries a lot about it. Keeps him up. What have you... Like, I've heard about him. I've heard about this phenomenon, but I think it's something that happens in, like, only the fanciest neighborhoods. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:23 Oh, yeah. I don't live in a super fancy neighborhood. Okay. It happened in your neighborhood. It happens. Yeah. And what are you in a mid fancy? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:30 I actually have no idea. What is the, what is the process? Does like, do you hear him coming down the street and you run out with your knives? Yeah, you grab your knives and you run. Cause he's driving.
Starting point is 00:06:43 Yeah. He's not stopping. I know. No, I did see an ice cream truck this year in a parking lot somewhere they were just set up and they were just reeling them in i just i never got a chance to eat one of those like spongebob square pants ones with the gumball eyes you like to want to eat one of those every year yeah i just like to see them i don't necessarily have to eat them, but if I see a kid. We could Google it.
Starting point is 00:07:07 Yeah, but I need it in person. You can Google it. Oh, that'll do it. I'm starving. Well, Google some food. Jordann, did you grow up in Toronto, Ontario, Canada?
Starting point is 00:07:19 No, she didn't. Graham, you got here two minutes after her. Oh, where are you? I know her life story. I am from Saskatchewan. Regina, Saskatchewan. Regina, Saskatchewan.
Starting point is 00:07:29 Yep, where are you? Did you go to university there? Did you leave before university? I did go to university for two years for like, just, I was just fucking around. Yeah, just Googling this and that all over the place. Google a book. Yeah, I thought maybe I'd be a teacher or whatever. But really, I was just, I was loving the improv club in in university okay started an improv club and also started an air band club that i didn't um have the skills to really sure it's funny there's
Starting point is 00:07:59 no um there's no like uh professional outlet for air bands. There's like not, there's not. Yeah. No, they really should be. Yeah. So air bands, is this a Canadianism?
Starting point is 00:08:14 Uh, I don't know. I know my brother, Dan was in a national competition and I think he finished third. Oh wow. Yeah. That's huge. But I think you have to know. Wait, Dan Clark. Yeah. finished third. Oh, wow. Yeah. That's huge. But I think you have to know
Starting point is 00:08:25 how to park. Yeah, Dan Clark. The airbend bronze medalist. What does he play? He plays the guitar. Wow. But I think you actually have to be able to play an instrument to like sell the...
Starting point is 00:08:36 So it's like a lip thinking. Yeah. But also instrumenting. Yeah. But also it's whatever you want. Yeah. Yeah. There should be's whatever you want. Yeah. Yeah. There should be a rule that you can't actually know how to play the instrument.
Starting point is 00:08:49 You know, it should be more make-believe, I think. Right. So you can make the guitar any size. Yeah. And just be tapping along. I like to go like, you know. Yeah. Let's see your bass stance.
Starting point is 00:08:58 That's your lead guitar. What's your bass? It's the same thing. Same bass. See, I don't know the difference. But that should be good. I think bass hangs down a little bit lower. Or it goes a little higher. Oh. Or it goes a little higher.
Starting point is 00:09:05 Oh, maybe it goes a little higher. Depending on the guy. Yeah. I feel like Primus guy, he's probably a high up guy. Graham, he has a name. I've been just... Isn't his name like Walter Zonko or something? Yes, it's Walter Zonko.
Starting point is 00:09:20 Who's this? He's the bass player from Primus. How's your Primus knowledge? It's been better. It's fallen off. Yeah. What did, boy, you're, I'm assuming, younger than us. What did stoner nerds listen to in your high school?
Starting point is 00:09:39 I don't know. They didn't talk to me. Oh, were you a drama kid in high school? I was an improv girl. Yeah. They had an improv club at your school? Yep. Dave's did too.
Starting point is 00:09:49 There was nothing like that when I was growing up. It was amazing. It was like the reason to be there. Yeah, I think it's much more common now. Yeah. It must be. Yeah, right. Because it's like people, I guess, know how to teach it.
Starting point is 00:10:01 I don't know. Like, do you have a teacher that came in for it? Or was it the math teacher doing improv? Some years we had people come in and other years it was my English teachers, but they were really good, I think.
Starting point is 00:10:10 Yeah? Yeah. And then you went to university and you were like, I'm going to get a straight job. I'm going to get
Starting point is 00:10:16 just a normal down the lane job. I didn't even say that. I didn't even like have the thought, oh, I'm going to do something, you know?
Starting point is 00:10:23 Yeah. It's so weird i'm just fine i'm just now being like i really wasn't a person yet like i had no yeah it is kind of weird right like you think you're a person when you're 18 but you're like just kind of a blob of clay you're like i will apply for this and i wasn't like oh i'm gonna i don't know you gotta go to college so you can be i don't know the knife the knife man. Yeah. It's really strange. And then like you, did you move right to Toronto? You moved somewhere else first?
Starting point is 00:10:51 Yeah. Then I moved right to Toronto. I dropped out. I did a improv intensive in Winnipeg for a week and then met some people there who were like comedians full time. And then I was like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You can be a full time. And then I was like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You can be a full time comedian? And then I dropped out of university. Love saying that.
Starting point is 00:11:12 Yeah. And moved to Toronto in two weeks. Oh, really? Yeah. Nice. And how long have you been there since? Eight. Eight years.
Starting point is 00:11:18 Eight years. So you like saying you dropped out of university? Yeah, it's kind of cool. It's better to say you got kicked out. Because then people are like, what'd you do? And then I got kicked out. Yeah. Yeah. I got kicked out of university? Yeah, it's kind of cool. It's better to say you got kicked out. Because then people are like, what'd you do? And then I got kicked out. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:27 Yeah. I got kicked out of university. You have to do something pretty severe. I killed the dean. Yeah. Yeah. Could you say...
Starting point is 00:11:33 I caused a riot. Yeah. You get kicked out for not applying on time. Sure. Next year, maybe something like that. Yeah, that's true. Or applying yourself.
Starting point is 00:11:42 That's another thing that would kick you out for if you weren't. Yeah. Do you do do you do stand-up and you do improv sketch i don't really do improv anymore how come it misses you it's hard i really wish i did but i just never like found i never found an easy you never on the easy way? I sound so stupid. I never was able to do it without trying. That's why I started stand-up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:19 Your album is dropping as this podcast is dropping as well. It's called I Can Explain. Yeah. And that's why I drew a picture of a plane. Yeah. Did you record it one shot recording or did you? I did two. Two.
Starting point is 00:12:33 Okay. All right. Just like Eminem says, you only get two shots. Yeah. Because the first time you're going to be more nervous and then the second time you can really be loose. Yeah. That's what he says. Do you have, because I know there's some people that I've heard their albums and there's one person in the audience that has a very distinct
Starting point is 00:12:49 laugh yeah did you have there's a few but i don't think it's like too distracting okay it is kind of funny like if you if i can tell which night is which night based on like if like a couple people are right going hard but um i don't think it's too bad do you most is it a mix of both nights yeah oh wow yeah i saw this clip of uh a french tv show and all the guests they just invited people on who had they weren't like famous or anything they were just people who had unique laughs. Yes. And there's no, like they just are laughing at each other laughing the whole time. It's so good.
Starting point is 00:13:27 And I, you know what, I got to hand it to your friends. Yeah. Yeah. You got to give it to friends. That is really good.
Starting point is 00:13:35 We were talking before we started recording about like stand-up comedy rules that you were taught by maybe. Did you go on tour with somebody and learn road dog things? No, I haven't really been a major road dog yeah i went to humber that's right yeah you don't go on the road i went to college got kicked out from what i heard got kicked out
Starting point is 00:13:56 um when i graduated um yeah did we learn anything well i um no okay okay but humber is uh for people who don't know it's a college that offers a comedy degree comedy diploma yes and for the record i did love it yes but the thing is things it's famous for are oh yeah i know what the the most famous thing what uh that uh the teacher one time when he was on stage, he went backstage and there was a giant Caesar salad that had been
Starting point is 00:14:29 sitting there for God knows how long. He ate the whole salad. He went on stage and he shit himself. That is not what I was going to say
Starting point is 00:14:38 at all. I've never heard that. I have heard that. Yeah, right? The thing it's famous for is they teach you to cook in a hotel room. That's right. That is true as well.
Starting point is 00:14:51 But then you were also saying the advice, or like, the thing they said was, go on stage hungry. Yeah, yeah. And literally. Yes, go on stage hungry, be hungry. Maybe that's where it came from. Like, don't eat the whole Caesar salad. Yeah, do not eat the whole Caesar salad.
Starting point is 00:15:06 You want to be a little hungry when you go out there. I want to just know about this. That's all I know. How long did it take him? To eat it? Whoa, the whole thing. I think he ate it, and then he was, I think he was the closing act. And so he's just sitting backstage just shoveling in, like, who knows how many hours it's been sitting out.
Starting point is 00:15:32 And then, yeah. Sitting on stage. And then he was a teacher there for a while. It's not like it's a big stage. You can get off stage pretty fast. Yeah. And honestly, he was one of my favorite teachers. Yeah?
Starting point is 00:15:44 Yeah. He's a really good guy. you can get off stage pretty fast yeah and honestly he was one of my favorite teachers yeah yeah he's a really good guy actually well I can't say that for sure but I think he was a good guy yeah
Starting point is 00:15:50 I mean that's not it's not a knock against him that he should have talked about absolutely a comedy phrase that has to be said
Starting point is 00:15:57 in 2023 I think he's a good guy I actually can't commit and then like did you start open mics were you
Starting point is 00:16:09 yeah I did a little bit of open mics and I how do you like that culture how do you like the open mic culture
Starting point is 00:16:15 it's fun right you know it's scary it's very scary out there but it's okay it's okay kind of
Starting point is 00:16:22 no it depends it totally depends where you go. Had you done any stand-up before you went to Humber? I had done, in high school, we did like one, I was in the performing arts class where they were like, teach yourself anything, do anything. And I did, I taught myself how to do stand-up, which I basically just told a story of like peeing my pants when I was a kid. That's pretty good. Not, you know, everybody pees. That's not even, you know. Yeah. Sure. stand-up which i basically just told a story of like peeing my pants when i was a kid which is pretty good not you know everybody pees that's not even you know yeah sure but it's relatable
Starting point is 00:16:50 yeah it's yeah because everybody had you just drank a caesar's house movie or something yes but the set was like three minutes and then i did an improvised dance number for the other half of my performance i love that it was really strange i love that the teacher's like yeah just teach yourself whatever i'll be over here yes smoking yeah um yeah did you get laughs yeah i did yeah what got more laughs the stand-up or the improvised i don't know honestly i did a really funny improvised dance in high school for some reason it was a hobby of mine i believe oh doing different ones to different songs or yeah just like in the improv room i would just put on a song and tell people like i'm gonna be doing this dance now if you want to come see it i'm
Starting point is 00:17:33 gonna be doing a dance i'm gonna be over yeah it's cool if you want to stop by i'll be dancing regardless but if you want to stop by um this is related uh in the movie napoleon dynamite yes he does a big dance uh at the end it's sort of the spoiler that i've got that do we think it was improvised the character did the character had the character rehearsed it i think he had because he had the like break dance video that he was watching in his room he did yeah he came out of his room. Yeah, so I think it was pre-planned, but I think the actor did it on the day and nobody knew that he was going to do it.
Starting point is 00:18:11 Yeah, it wasn't one take. I'll say that. Yeah, it was pretty good. It was the dance of my generation. It was the Napoleon Dynamite dance. What was the dance from your generation? Some crazy frog or something oh yeah okay yeah crazy frog man he's really stayed with us all these years around uh i don't know because i don't really know what he is yeah you know is he like a graphic or he's a ringtone
Starting point is 00:18:41 he's a program that you can make anything, I think, almost. Oh, yeah? I actually don't know. Teach yourself that. Probably be a crazy frogget. What did other kids teach themselves? Dance, musicals, painting, all sorts of things. Did you have to do this in front of the general population
Starting point is 00:19:06 of your school? Or was this like in front of the other arts class? You're always revert of schools with prison lingo. And gen pop? Yeah. And was the warden there?
Starting point is 00:19:16 It was in front of the class but it was a big class. For some reason this was a multi-grade class. Okay. And we called ourselves BPAC for Performing Arts Crew
Starting point is 00:19:26 nice we had t-shirts too it's very interesting little class that we had if you had been older you probably
Starting point is 00:19:32 would have got matching tattoos right yeah for sure but matching shirts is pretty cool yeah my math class
Starting point is 00:19:37 had matching shirts in high school really and my friend did a cartoon of the teacher and I forget he was saying
Starting point is 00:19:43 something and it was just like on the breast yeah like uh on a polo shirt yeah yeah and we all liked this design and then the teacher ordered them for us and the back no one consented to having anything on the back oh no it was on the back a giant uh uh graphic that said math is radical with the radical symbol over it. So it went from being like our normal shirt
Starting point is 00:20:12 with a secret little joke on it to We also got jackets for our art class like windbreakers and they had just like Balfour Arts or whatever and then on the back, big paint splatter that said sometimes we all need a good kick in the arts that is fun yeah nice and long yeah and it's also just something like you would see on memo paper yeah or like something uh you know asking
Starting point is 00:20:40 for donors to give to the your organization You're from Saskatchewan. Did you call hoodies? Bunny hugs. Bunny hugs. Absolutely. What about couches as Chesterfields? No. Okay.
Starting point is 00:20:53 My grandparents may have. Yeah, I think Chesterfield is an all-Canadian thing. Oh, really? I thought it was Saskatchewan. It may be slightly more, but... Bunny hug is very adorable. When you go home, do you still say bunny hug? I still say it.
Starting point is 00:21:06 I mean, do I? In mixed company? Hmm. Because you know people are going to razz you when you leave the room. Yeah. Do I still say it? I don't know. I guess I'm not talking about bunny hugs that often.
Starting point is 00:21:18 Right. Do you wear hoodies? I do. I do. I gave up on hoodies because it was a crutch. You love them? I was leaving. Yeah, I was up on hoodies because it was a crutch. You love them? I was leaving. Yeah, I was wearing only hoodies.
Starting point is 00:21:27 Yeah. And then a couple weeks ago, I wore one again. And it's just like the fruit. It's the sweetest. So comfy. I got rid of them for years. Really? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:37 I'm back as of the pandemic, basically. Yeah. They're perfect. They're pretty good. They are perfect. And they're just like so adaptable. Yeah. They're perfect. They're pretty good. They are perfect. And they're just like so adaptable. Yeah. They're great.
Starting point is 00:21:46 The one thing that I'll say is every time I put something in the front pocket and then I see that in the mirror, I'm like, why? Oh, that looks so bad. You can't put anything in there. A bunch of rolls of coins. Yeah. I always end up with a bunch of napkins and stuff in there. And then it's just like, that just looks really bad. I've become like a real, just take too many napkins and then just keep a like that just looks really bad. I've become like a real just take too many napkins
Starting point is 00:22:07 and then just keep a napkin in my pocket everywhere I go. It's scary to not have a napkin in your pocket. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:12 Now I'm like I won't leave the house without checking and making sure. Yeah. And then when you go to use them just rip one in half
Starting point is 00:22:19 to save the other half. Oh yeah. That's what I like to do. Do we know where the name bunny hug comes from? I think it just looks like a bunny hug i guess like you're putting i don't know doesn't it not just seem like a you got the hood up that's like a almost like a bunny's head you have the arms of the arms of the bunny yeah and then the
Starting point is 00:22:44 bunny little tummy uh huh which is kind of more like a kangaroo it is a little bit more like a kangaroo but kangaroos that's not the imagery
Starting point is 00:22:50 we're trying to we're not trying to get Australian no we're not yeah yeah yeah so bunny hug is it's adorable yeah
Starting point is 00:22:57 um is Regina the city that has a Mahatma Gandhi statue no it's Saskatoon that's Saskatoon okay
Starting point is 00:23:04 although that's actually where I am born. Oh, yeah. Home of the Mahatma Gandhi statue. I don't even know. There's also one in Edmonton.
Starting point is 00:23:13 Yeah? Yeah. Huh. I remember we went, we did a tour and I was like, two cities in two days with two Mahatma Ghandas
Starting point is 00:23:20 that stay at Mahatma Ghanda? Like somebody saying Tortilla there. And Mahatma Ghanda. Fix saying Tortilla there. Mahatma Ganda. Fix yourself a dang kiss of Tilla. Napoleon Dynamite over here. It comes back.
Starting point is 00:23:34 Did you grow up in the city or out in the country? In the city. Okay. Do you know people that were living out in the country? A little bit. Strange folk out there. Yeah. Yeah, I have some friends who grew up like farms and stuff, and I have family that farms and that sort of thing, but not too small town.
Starting point is 00:23:55 Right. Yeah. Does Humber have a farming program? No. Wait, does any place have a farming program? Yes, Saskatoon does. Oh, really? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:04 Okay, good. Well, ask and answer. I'm assuming any of the agricultural universities, Texas A&M. Yes. Whatever else, A&M. But like, you have the land first, right? Before you become a farmer. Well, first you get the land.
Starting point is 00:24:19 Yeah. Yeah. Then you get the know-how. Yeah. Yeah. Well, some people just move and then, I guess, no, then they get the land.how yeah yeah well some people just move and then i guess no then they get the land yeah you're right yeah because it's like you wouldn't get a degree in farming then be like now to find a farm right or would you some people might you might maybe if you're
Starting point is 00:24:36 a migrant worker yeah yeah but like it doesn't seem like something you'd need a degree for. But I don't know. Okay. Exactly. Yeah. Look. Yeah. Um. Hey,
Starting point is 00:24:48 look, no farm, no food. There. I said it. Yep. Absolutely. Um,
Starting point is 00:24:53 yeah, I, uh, there was a couple of kids in my school that lived on farms and they were really like. Really farmy. Really farmy wearing Wrangler jeans, which was foreboding in my school. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:04 Yeah. What were the, what was the foreboding clothing at your school was there like a shirt that was like oh that's so dorky hmm i feel like everything was like everything was bad like everything was everything that everybody was wearing was really ugly so everything kind of passed you know right it was just a really bad time for fashion when I was in high school. And your, has your fashion come back around or are we still, cause like the fashion that I grew up with is now. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:25:32 I don't think like 2012 is, is back yet. It's going to be though. I guess. Yeah, probably will be. I hope it doesn't like long t-shirts, you know,
Starting point is 00:25:42 long t-shirts rule. Come on. No, no, no. Yeah. What else what else again if i had to for me i well i of course uh i'm from the early 2000s and so i wear um really low-cut jeans and von dutch hat those are definitely back yeah yeah oh they are always showing my midriff get one of those tan line tattoos. Yeah, tan line tattoos. I wear a little bit of like very glittery moisturizer all over my arms, I guess.
Starting point is 00:26:12 That would be really cool for the men of today to start doing. Glitter? Glittery lotion. Absolutely. Constant. Is that a thing? Like, is that what it was? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:22 That I'm only picturing christina aguilera where yeah yeah like it's a glittery body lotion i know you can get it at victoria's secret still no i actually don't know but probably probably you know what right in everybody if you work at victoria's secret right in also tell me what bra size i should be wearing yeah this these are not working. There's often a sign out front of a women's clothing store on Canby that offers
Starting point is 00:26:49 free bra. Yeah. Measure. It's really interesting. I went recently in and I was like, I don't want any help. I don't want any help.
Starting point is 00:26:57 I don't want, nope, I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay. And then she kept saying, you know, I think you need help. And I had to give it to her.
Starting point is 00:27:07 She was right. Yeah. And she had to come into the change room and help me. Wow. Which was scary, but it ended up working out. Good. I'm glad you found the right fit. The only equivalent is when you're getting suit pants made and the guy was like trying to feel around left or right.
Starting point is 00:27:23 Oh, wow. Yeah. I mean, you can say it, but they're going to get up there with the chop. Yeah. Yeah. It's very funny, though, that that's... Like, what were you doing wrong? The person was sort of like, no, no, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:27:39 Yeah. Let me come in there. I guess like they... I can hear you putting that on wrong. They just know the sizes so well. And it's not, it's not obvious. Like what,
Starting point is 00:27:52 what, how the sizes work. Yeah. You know, like you think, oh, it needs to be bigger. Nope.
Starting point is 00:27:56 You're wrong. You're completely wrong. It needs to be way smaller. It's not like, I'll grow into this or whatever. Like, I'll get an exercise or stuff it to make it, like, you know, work. I don't know anything about bras. I'm still wearing falsies. Still.
Starting point is 00:28:18 Oh, man. I, uh... Well, that was a great conversation to have. Not one we normally do about bra sizing yeah um they don't teach you that at humber no they uh yeah it's just it's like a very specific market they're targeting and i bet you at least once a day somebody's coming in again in the middle oh yeah um i'm trying to think of what the other thing that i saw the other day on a sandwich board that was supposed to be enticing oh Oh, well, is it the bra place? Is that further down, Camby? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:48 Because there's a place by the movie theater that just does sex puns. Oh, yeah, they do a lot of sex puns on their sandwich board, which is a lot of fun. We also have a legendary strip club that the marquee is very funny. The person who does the marquee does like a funny joke. Oh, that's awesome. It's probably the best thing I guess about the strip club if I had to go down a list. Not for me, man.
Starting point is 00:29:11 Not at all. I've made a list and that's not even top 20. But it's like, it's old place. It's called the penthouse? The penthouse. And they have like a cool bar upstairs that used to be jazz bar for performers from out of town would go there. And so there you go. There's your history lesson.
Starting point is 00:29:35 Have you gotten into that stage of life where you're like, that used to be a bank? No. No. It'll come. Yeah, for sure. Because you're definitely at some point, like, I know things that I'm like, that used to be a blockbuster. Oh yeah. That's a real estate off and now it's a blockbuster.
Starting point is 00:29:52 Yeah. Um, yeah. Uh, I, there's somewhere in town that still has the remnants of a blockbuster sign on their parking. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is that the one that's 16th and Oak? Yes.
Starting point is 00:30:05 That is the, uh, it's an enormous two floor. I mean, the fact that it was a two floor blockbuster is the hubris, but it's now it's a real estate agent and that seems too big. Yeah. And like,
Starting point is 00:30:20 uh, I heard, and I don't, I don't know if this is true, but Netflix went to blockbuster and said like, like, will you have this system? And they were like, no, we're making too much money off of late returns. Oh, back in the day. Back in the day, yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:34 Imagine they were going to them now. Hey, wake up, wake up. Blockbuster, this is all a terrible dream. Yeah, it's a... If you could go back to blockbuster times would you yeah yeah i would too and change everything yeah change it all yeah i would go especially because um they're just the that was a part of the date yeah just walking around the store and yeah you know checking out the funny movie covers and stuff like that yeah and it's so fun like when you're a kid and you're just like it's just makes it so much more exciting than going on netflix and and yeah being like oh fuck it's a trip yeah it is like it was you added half an hour to the movie watching experience yeah which if i get two minutes
Starting point is 00:31:23 into like scrolling for a movie i want to see on a streaming service, I'm like, I'm done. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Also, it's just fun to get something, you know? Yeah. And now if you're going to have a movie night, you don't get anything. You already have everything.
Starting point is 00:31:37 That's true. So it's not what's special about it. Yeah. Yeah. You need to have a really, really good pair of pajamas. Yeah. Yeah. But, you know, if you've got a good pair, you're wearing them every night.
Starting point is 00:31:47 You're wearing them out. Yeah, exactly. Not so special. No, you got to wash them. Yeah. Putting the return in the slot, that was also very satisfying. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:56 Like, just having that as a chore to do. Like, I'm going out to the girls. Well, I should just return those videos. And they had to put up special instructions for how to return Titanic because there was two tapes. Wow. That's cool yeah did you guys have a movie that you rented like again and again and again yeah mine was uh a kung fu movie called black belt jones and uh i probably could say it word for word and it's uh it's just it's fantastic it's just the 70s on overdrive and is it from the 70s yeah okay but like we would rent it at least once every two weeks and watch it because there's no uh you couldn't buy it i couldn't buy it yeah yeah did you yeah we would always we would always get i
Starting point is 00:32:40 forget what it's even called the troll in central park or something maybe the guy with the green the troll with the green thumb and we were obsessed with that one it's a kid's movie it's even called. The Troll in Central Park or something, maybe? Oh, sure. The guy with the green, the troll with the green thumb. And we were obsessed with that one. Was it a kid's movie? It was a kid's movie, yeah. Okay. But then you got to wonder, like, why didn't your parents just source a copy of it? Yeah. I guess maybe they were hopeful every time we went, oh, they're going to pick something else.
Starting point is 00:32:59 Yeah. But you don't. Yeah. You just, yeah, you stick with your favorite. Yeah. Sometimes you would go and there would be a movie that was like a famous movie. Yes. That was like kind of a knockoff.
Starting point is 00:33:11 And they'd be close enough. Yeah. That you'd be like, oops, I accidentally rented Carnosaur. Yeah. The one we kept renting, I forget what it was called. It was about this guy. He had like curly blonde hair and he wanted you to vote for his friend pedro oh god i just if i could find out the name of anyone out there if this is like i'm sure one guy out there's like that scratching an itch for me too i'm sure one guy out there is doing
Starting point is 00:33:38 that yeah and he doesn't know that you know he doesn doesn't get it? Yeah. That we've mentioned it? Yeah. Yeah, you've really, you've got our listeners down to a T. No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's not you, it's them. Listeners, we love you. I'm sorry, I would never, it's her, it's her.
Starting point is 00:34:00 But there is one of you. And you know who you are, you son of a B. But there is one of you. And you know who you are, you son of a B. Did you have a Blockbuster or did you have a local video store? We had a Blockbuster. Is a local video store, is that a brand or no? No, just like an indie.
Starting point is 00:34:17 Crazy Mike's. Right. We did have like the corner store type of ones that we would go to a lot too. Oh yeah, corner store. Yeah, my brothers and I would walk and get a movie from the corner store and candy and that was great. That sounds like that. It sounds like you
Starting point is 00:34:29 went to farm school. Yeah, I would want to go back. You would go to the gas station to rent a movie. Yeah. I would go back to Blockbuster times
Starting point is 00:34:35 if I could just, oh, the idea of walking home with a movie and a Slurpee. Yeah. Oh God, yes.
Starting point is 00:34:40 Some, what are those called? Those clusters with the chocolate all over them? Chocolate clusters. Yes. Is that what are those called? Those clusters with the chocolate all over them? Chocolate clusters. Yes. Is that what they're called?
Starting point is 00:34:49 No, I don't know. There was a brand of boys' names. The Kevins? Yeah. The Kevins. I have no idea what you're talking about. Really? A cluster of chocolate clusters.
Starting point is 00:35:01 I'm thinking of like a turtle. No. Oh, is it? In a bag. Is it? God damn it. They were on turtle. No. Oh, is it? In a bag. Is it? God damn it. They were on Dragon's Den. Yeah, probably.
Starting point is 00:35:09 It was like a Canadian brand. Was it sex cereal? No, it wasn't sex cereal. It wasn't. Oh, God. This is going to kill. Now there's somebody out there going, Jesus Christ, it's whatever. It's a fun time.
Starting point is 00:35:22 He's delicious snacks. What are those? I can only think of Mike and X, but certainly not that. It's whatever. It's fun Tommy's delicious snacks. What were those? I can only think of Mike and Ike's, but certainly not that. Mike and Ike's? No. Not those. No, but they're like a gummy.
Starting point is 00:35:35 Like a chewy. Yeah. Anyway, these clusters were really good. They had them at my blockbuster. Were Mike and Ike's... Oh, my God. Here we go. They were like little cylinders. Yeah. Or like little little cylinders. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:45 Or like little pill shape. Yeah. Yeah. And were they two different flavors, Mike and Ike? Or were they all just like a little bit like fruity, cinnamony? Yeah. Because Red Hots were. They were all hot.
Starting point is 00:35:57 But they were like hot cinnamon, right? Yeah. Right. And they were the similar shape. Yeah. Yeah. I couldn't tell you what a Mike and Ike was. I kind of had like going through. I think they were like different.
Starting point is 00:36:07 Maybe there was a fruit. I'm not sure if there's a fruit variation or if they were all fruit flavored. I think. Yeah, I think it was variation. Yeah. That's what my memory is. I'll have to go buy some on the way home when I stop at the gas station to get myself a movie. Did you, did they know you at this gas station? Do they know you
Starting point is 00:36:26 at this gas station do they know you by name yeah no no not by name no but they knew me by style
Starting point is 00:36:33 yeah yeah you had glittery lotion on or something that was your style yeah what was your style
Starting point is 00:36:40 when you were a teenager oh tell me oh god just really bad it's 2012 business woman like business woman when you were a teenager. Oh, tell me. Oh, God. Just really bad. It's 2012, Graham. Business woman, like... Business woman? Everything was so businessy then for a moment.
Starting point is 00:36:51 Yeah, it was very... Everyone was doing Leslie Knope. Collars and... Oh, collars. Yes, collars. Skirts, like pencil skirts. And like, why? Why?
Starting point is 00:37:01 Was it because Mad Men was on the air? No, that's too far back. I don't know. Fancy little tops, you know? Yeah. High schoolers. Yeah. In pencil skirts.
Starting point is 00:37:10 Yep. I maybe don't know what a pencil skirt is. It's just like a black. A skirt made of pencils? Yeah. No, it's a skirt that's really easy to draw. It actually is, because it's just like this. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:23 For the listeners, she went, whoop. Basically, the shape of Saskatchewan. Yeah. Actually, no. Sorry, that's not quite what a pencil skirt is. Because a pencil skirt is like a tube. It's a little bit more curved, yeah. Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:37:35 Sorry, I touched the mic. Well, get out of here. I just bought a skirt. Oh, yeah? It's not a pencil one, though. You're gesturing to a bag. You bought it today. Yeah, just today.
Starting point is 00:37:43 Don't even like it that much, but had to buy it. All right. Because you didn't want somebody else to have it? No. I just wanted something. Can I get a look at it? Yeah. You want to see it?
Starting point is 00:37:52 Yeah. Absolutely. Okay, listener. She's grabbing a bag, pulling out a skirt. Oh, it is dark colored, little patterning. Little patterns. Yeah. And it's from a vintage store.
Starting point is 00:38:04 What is it called? Something, not vintage, mintage market? Mintage, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, wow. That seemed like it was really wrong, you know. No, you nailed it. Mintage market. But that's what it's called.
Starting point is 00:38:17 Yeah. You know what? I hope things work out for you in the skirt. You had to get something. What's the name of the brand? Clio. Clio, yeah. Oh, Clio, number one in skirts. Little business woman. Are you a big vintage shopper? Yeah. out for you in the skirt you had to get something what's the name of the brand cleo cleo oh cleo
Starting point is 00:38:25 number one little business woman um are you a big vintage shopper yeah yeah i am yeah it's fun i like the hunt actually do i is it better uh do you go in every city do you prefer it in saskatchewan do you or how's toronto versus here i do like to go everywhere. Here was nice. Toronto's really, I live in a really good spot for thrifting. There's like. You know Kensington Market? No, like Value Village. I'm in like Bloor West. My neighborhood is called Value Village.
Starting point is 00:38:56 They know my name there. Yeah. But there's a lot of little shops around and like some that are like more expensive and some that are cheaper and some that are more curated and some that are wild. Yeah. I like the wild one. Yeah. Yeah. Cause it's like anything could be in there.
Starting point is 00:39:11 Yeah. But also anything could be in there, you know, it's a real double edged sword. And then it's nice to have a little curated one right beside it. So if you feel like, Oh man, I don't have it in me for this today.
Starting point is 00:39:20 Yeah. You can take it. You can take the easy route. Yeah. That's self care. Yeah. But the easy route yeah that's self-care yeah but the easy road that place smells really bad i don't know why it always smells like sewage in this one place yeah it's i went to um i was on vacation in new york and walked past a goodwill depot so it wasn't a store it was just like you went in and everybody big bins yeah and they just like dumped these clothes in these big bins and everybody just went nuts i just remember
Starting point is 00:39:50 a guy finding like a gimp mask and throwing it high in the air and everybody laughed yeah whoever had that was like, wow, somebody else might like this. Yeah. Hard to clean leather though, you know? No, it, it's, uh, it's,
Starting point is 00:40:09 yeah, you're right. It's bad. I guess you could get a ticket to like a shoeshiner. You're wearing it at the airport. Laying upside down in the chair. Hey, come on over here,
Starting point is 00:40:20 sir. Yeah, can I use the chair from the, in airport massage place? Yeah. I mean, if that's how somebody that's into that gets ready for a night out of the town,
Starting point is 00:40:32 polishing it with a glove. Boy, have you ever done one of those airport massages? No, but I'm, I'm eternally curious. Yeah, I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:40:41 I got my nails done one time. let me see. Oh, they're great. It's worn off a little bit no it looks like yeah yeah i can tell yeah but i didn't like time it out well like it was like came down to where i was like oh no i have to go get on my plane now like oh yeah i can't wait for these to dry i have to go right now yeah and panic yeah that's it yeah so that was weird i don't i sometimes just make weird choices like that where I'm like, oh, I shouldn't have done this. You know? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:10 Yeah. I've done like, especially at airports where I'll sit down and be like, I can just eat a quick thing of chili or whatever, you know? And then like, it takes forever to get there. And I'm like, oh, come on, eat it. Bring me the meal. Bring me the meal. Yeah. Just eat this Caesar salad that's been laying around the airport for hours.
Starting point is 00:41:29 Yeah. Backstage at the airport. Couldn't hurt. I'm doing a set on the plane. Oh, my God. I knew a guy when WestJet started who did a set on a plane. Yeah. Because they were like, this is going to be the kooky new airline.
Starting point is 00:41:44 Oh, yeah. Can you imagine? Well, actually, I did imagine one time, so much so that I got nervous. I was on a plane and the TVs were broken. And you thought they'd be like, is there a performer on the plane? Yeah. And I thought that I would be like, yes, there is. And I started like, you know, when you're about to perform, your heart starts racing and stuff.
Starting point is 00:42:04 And I started like, you know, when you're, when you're about to perform, your heart starts like racing and stuff. I've started getting that feeling as if I was about to volunteer myself, even though they had not asked. You just walk up and just take the phone off. I'd only been doing standup for like a year. This is it. This is my big chance. There's three minutes about me peeing as a child. Scary, scary to think that you could just be like, yes, me's scary. There's three minutes about me peeing as a child. Scary. Scary to think that you could just be like, yes, me.
Starting point is 00:42:29 Yeah. Yeah. And then be in big trouble. Yeah. You could probably like, you'd be on a no-fly list after that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. She just picked up the intercom and wouldn't let us get, she hid in the bathroom with it
Starting point is 00:42:43 and she just kept talking and talking. Lots of jokes about the plane going down. What about those toilets? They're so loud, hey? Check it out. You never do hear that over the PA. No, you don't. She's saying what we're all thinking.
Starting point is 00:43:03 Dave, what's going on with you, my friend? Oh, man! Well, not much. What did we talk about last time? You talked about... I talked about Tamagotchi. I talked about... Oh, you know what I didn't talk about?
Starting point is 00:43:20 Did we talk about watching a scary movie? Nope. Okay. So, the kids and i are you sure uh well i'll tell you if it's familiar uh the kids wanted to do like a movie night okay we do this every few weeks where we go to blockbuster it's basically that but it's like a friday or saturday night we grab all the uh blankets bring them down to the couch. Sometimes I'll even drag the futon mattress in there. And so like you can lie on the ground.
Starting point is 00:43:50 But it's so heavy. And I have to time it with when I cut my nails because if my nails are too short, it's an issue. And I do like my nails cut really short. Sorry, no movie night tonight. Yeah, sorry, guys. But they wanted to watch a scary movie.
Starting point is 00:44:11 Oh, yeah. And so we watched a scary movie, too. No. They didn't get a lot of the references. We watched, I was like, oh, when I was a kid, the only horror movie that I liked, and it's still probably my favorite horror movie, though I haven't seen it since 1990, Arachnophobia. Arachnophobia. Have you seen it? No.
Starting point is 00:44:32 It's funny, right? It's fun and funny. It's a family movie. Right. Oh, wow. And it stars Jeff Daniels as the new doctor in town. John Goodman in it? John Goodman is Delbert.
Starting point is 00:44:48 Okay. Delbert. The, what are you, exterminator? Okay. And it's got like so many actors, you're like, oh, I've seen him in 10 things. Yeah. I hate about you. You've got Heath Ledger, Joseph Gordon-Levitt.
Starting point is 00:45:00 hate about you you got Heath Ledger Joseph Gordon-Levitt yeah I feel like maybe people weren't using the word phobia as much before that movie came out
Starting point is 00:45:11 and then I feel like that's where I learned what phobia meant yeah that makes sense yeah you got a phobia? do I have a phobia?
Starting point is 00:45:22 performing on an airplane performing on an airplane I recently got scared of airplanes and just took um my first airplane drug um on my way here actually and it really helped me a lot oh yeah yeah would you are you microdosing yeah well what's it what airplane drug um lexapran Yeah, that sounds like something. Is it like a, but it's like a sleepy time? Yeah. Sleepy and calm. And I did a test run like the day before I flew and I was like, this isn't working.
Starting point is 00:45:53 I'm not falling asleep. This is not working. I'm freaking out. But then when I was actually on the plane, it worked. I didn't feel, I was like, oh, I'm having, I'm like thinking about the plane going down, but I'm not like reacting to that. Like my body's not starting to freak out, you know? I think that's normal.
Starting point is 00:46:08 I think about it going down every time I, every time there's like, apparently I heard this from nowhere. I heard this thing from not an expert. Yeah. But apparently, what are they called? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:21 Turbulence does not, like there's no plane crashes. From turbulence? From turbulence. Oh, okay. But that can't be called? Yeah. Turbulence does not, like there's no plane crashes. From turbulence? From turbulence. Oh, okay. But that can't be true. Yeah. I've heard of turbulence that's so bad that like the masks come down.
Starting point is 00:46:34 Yeah. Or I've heard recently a flight attendant hits the roof. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because they're standing and then. Yikes. Yeah. That's enough to freak me out. No, I'm cool with that.
Starting point is 00:46:44 Dude, check it out I didn't hit the roof there's rules but the pill was good it allowed me to think of those things but not like think of them rapidly
Starting point is 00:46:53 and like into a into a frenzy yeah you weren't in a state no yeah it was really nice I hope it's not too late
Starting point is 00:47:02 to bring this back but how about a bra store for people who are afraid of getting their bra measured called Arachnophobia. Arachnophobia. I don't know if that works. They would be in big business because lots of people don't like that. So we saw this movie. Now Poppy is six. Margo is eight. And this is like. like that. Yeah. So I, we saw this movie. Now Poppy is six. Margo is eight.
Starting point is 00:47:27 And this is like. Cute names. Thanks. This is like, scary movies are too scary. Mm-hmm. Yeah, for an authentically scary movie
Starting point is 00:47:37 is too scary. But this one has some real, like, some real good, like, juicy scares where like you go, and then you laugh it off oh nice yeah um uh but we uh poppy made it an hour and then she was like i do not want to watch this
Starting point is 00:47:56 anymore and and then we went up and i put her to bed and like read to her but while we're up there we could hear margo and abby still watching and like you would hear a scream and and uh just like it was a roller coaster for them they had so much fun yeah that's really fun you always remember like your first horror movie so that yeah yeah that's a new memory and then i uh watched the rest of it the next day and i i was still scared like that i still got you a handful of moments i remember scaring me like he's he's got like um uh can of spray paint and a lighter than he's trying to oh yeah kill the spider in like a vent a laundry vent and he shoots it down there and then there's like a pause as he's looking and then the spider jumps out.
Starting point is 00:48:46 Is it about many spiders or one big spider? Oh, baby. It's about so many spiders. Cool. So there's a spider from Venezuela. Okay. That kills a guy who's like taking pictures as part of like a science project. Does he eat him or just bite him he bites him but then
Starting point is 00:49:07 um well i guess feeds on him because the body gets transported back to america to this small town where the coroner this small town has a coroner um is like oh wow his body is completely drained of blood. And it's all like all... Skeletony. Skeletony. And then that spider gets out of the coffin, goes to this barn, Jeff Daniels' new barn, and mates with a local spider. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:49:36 Which I remember at the time, Entertainment Tonight said that that would be the equivalent of an elephant mating with a mouse. Wow. And they wouldn't because elephant and mice are... No mating with a mouse. Wow. And they wouldn't because elephant and mice are the only elephant. Yeah. You said you remember your first horror movie. Which was yours?
Starting point is 00:49:56 Orphan. Orphan. Do you remember seeing that? Orphanato? No. Is it? Was it like a Spanish one that turned English? No. Is it? Was it another, was it like a Spanish one that turned English? No, it was about, it was actually really scary about.
Starting point is 00:50:11 Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. Yeah. It's about this little girl who gets adopted into this family, starts being really, really creepy, killing people, I think. Yeah. And turns out she's actually like 30 or 40 years old. Yeah, then that was based on a real thing.
Starting point is 00:50:25 Yeah. That's very scary. I remember hearing the real story of that. I mean, I can't. I heard it on another podcast and I was like, I have to stop listening to this. Yeah. Wow. That was real.
Starting point is 00:50:35 Yeah. How did she do it? Did she really just look that young? No, I had to stop listening. Ooh. Because they were like, yeah, it was. Ooh, that is scary. Ooh.
Starting point is 00:50:44 I didn't even get to the murders. A true story. Yeah. Yeah. Um, but, uh, but that's not that old of a movie.
Starting point is 00:50:52 Well, I don't know. I think I watched, how old is it? I watched it when it came out. Yeah. Let's look up orphan everybody. We also watched scary movie three,
Starting point is 00:51:02 but that wasn't really, that was 2009 Is that one Okay So I was in grade 9 Okay Yeah Was that at a sleepover
Starting point is 00:51:10 Or did you just It was at my house I don't think it was a sleepover It was one of those It was a Friday night Type of movie With my dad Nice
Starting point is 00:51:17 Nice And were you freaked out Forever I was really freaked out by it Have you been freaked out By orphans Ever since Very scared of orphans Very against that as a concept yeah a lot of people after that were like let's burn down
Starting point is 00:51:31 an orphanage yeah it's very creepy i'm boycotting wendy's because dave thomas the founder was an um the uh anyway it's a good movie check it If you like, there's some gross out moments when John Goodman steps on a spider. Yeah. There's some really good, I mean, I saw it in the theater and it fooled me, but there's some really good, like, that's just like a prop that's covered in hair. Or like, that's a real spider, but you can see that they've got fishing line on it. hair or like that's a real spider but you can see that they've got fishing line on it uh in that league another movie that i've seen that's like fun and scary is the 1980s remake of the blob it's so funny and it's just this blob of slime and it just slowly eats everything in its mouth oh my god but yeah there's like uh just so
Starting point is 00:52:27 many funny little bits yeah it doesn't even sound scary as a concept like a big blob yeah but when it starts eating the townsfolk i suppose yeah have you heard the like it's like a thought experiment of like god what even is it but it's like there's a slug who wants to kill you a slow moving slug yeah okay and it will never stop trying to kill you
Starting point is 00:52:49 right and so you constantly have to keep your distance well yeah but you're like you don't have to keep that much distance
Starting point is 00:52:56 right like you can keep a lot of distance yeah but to buy a lot of time but then it's always after you but
Starting point is 00:53:02 I forget what the thought experiment of it is you also get 20 million dollars certainly interesting yeah it's always after you. But I forget what the thought experiment of it is. You also get $20 million. It's certainly interesting. Yeah, it's in somebody's will. You can move away. Yeah. But then you'd have to move again.
Starting point is 00:53:13 You couldn't really set up a life. Yeah, exactly. It'll get to you in a few years. Yeah. Damn. Be careful where you vacation. For all I know, there is a slug out there that's trying to kill me, and I'm just by accident getting farther away from it. Someone's so
Starting point is 00:53:26 mad that I didn't know the details of it. Dave, it's a snail. Yeah, oh, the other thing about this movie, oh yeah, so the plot is the big spider and the little spider have babies, and then the babies are huge, and they go rampaging, killing everyone.
Starting point is 00:53:44 The babies aren't as big as the original spider. But there's this pulsating egg sac. Oh no. And I'm like, I've always hated pulsating egg sacs. So this one was particularly traumatizing to me. Yeah. It's funny because you used to have to have the, like, he used to have to have a physical spider to film. There was no.
Starting point is 00:54:09 Oh yeah. This movie wouldn't be as much fun with CGI. Yeah. It's like, uh, have you ever seen Tremors? No, I've, uh, I've seen, I don't know why I haven't seen it. It's so funny. Have you seen it? No.
Starting point is 00:54:21 It's, uh. For some reason I've, that made me think Kevin Bacon was a second rate movie star. Oh no he shines in it. But the fact that it's like you know a horror kind of a campy horror movie. Yeah. I was like I don't think these are these are prestigious films.
Starting point is 00:54:40 But yeah it's ton of fun. It's like an underground snake. Oh cool you it'll eat you if you're on the land so you have to stay above ground the whole time that's fun uh but yeah that's another arachnophobia camp you got the bob arachnophobia the snake man um what's going on with you um well this past weekend i had family in town and uh it was my nephew's uh fourth birthday oh which is adorable what a cute little birthday what does a nephew want these days so here's the two things that happened uh three things really um i had to figure out where where do
Starting point is 00:55:23 you go with like it was my both of my brothers my sisters-in-law my parents the nephew myself my bride uh and uh bride of graham bride of graham uh she will hate that bless you um but yeah the uh i was like where do you take that group of people? Where do you go with that size of people where it's like not a huge inconvenience and the staff like putting tables together? To eat. Yeah. So I was like, the only thing I could think of right off the bat was the old spaghetti factory. Oh.
Starting point is 00:56:01 Yes, yes, yes. That's perfect. And it is, man, that place is fun Did you go You went Yeah We did And like nine people at a table No problem
Starting point is 00:56:09 Yeah Easy Kid birthday No problem I haven't been there in so long Do they Do you Can you draw on the tables there
Starting point is 00:56:16 No but there's plenty to draw I think of the macaroni grill Yeah I miss it But Yeah there's a big train in the middle of it Oh cool You can go yeah I miss it but yeah there's a big train in the middle of it
Starting point is 00:56:27 oh cool you can go you can eat on the train maybe I should go should I go to that here you should we don't I don't think we have one in Toronto
Starting point is 00:56:34 and we don't have one in Regina where I'm from either but we would go when I would go on my choir and band trips we would go to like Calgary and Edmonton and we would go to the old
Starting point is 00:56:42 spaghetti factory it's such a weird thing that doesn't feel like a chain thing that doesn't feel like a chain. Yeah. It doesn't feel like a chain. It sort of does feel like a chain, but it can't possibly be a chain. They're so far apart.
Starting point is 00:56:52 Yeah. It's magical. And I was like, maybe it's just a Canadian chain. Nope, it's international. They got them all over the States. Wow. But yes, you should go while you're here. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:02 What about Romano's Macaroni Grill? Is that a chain? I don't know. Sounds good. But it's one of the only places that I could think of that was like that. Because there used to be, I think, a lot of them. And then it went out of style. And now they dominate the field.
Starting point is 00:57:21 Yeah. Like, what's a silly place that you would take a four-year-old and like a bunch of relatives? I guess Eastside Mario's is not that serious. Yeah, that's true. But they're not too silly. But they do have a wheel you can spin and they do have little ice cream cones. Well, that's right there. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:38 Plus a million points. Yeah. For Margo's birthday, she was trying to, we said, we'll go to a restaurant for dinner. Yeah. For Margo's birthday, she was trying to, we said, we'll go to a restaurant for dinner. And we were like, you know, it'll probably be Boston pizza. And she was like, no, White Spot. Oh, nice.
Starting point is 00:57:53 Okay. White Spot, if you don't know, is a very middle of the road family restaurant. But they used to have, they have burgers. That's their big thing they're famous for. But the kids aren't interested in that. No. The burger part. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:13 And what they used to be famous for is they would be, and they still will, have, you can eat in the parking lot. Oh. And they bring a big tray out. Oh, that's cool. That goes across the. Oh, yeah. Is it like retro inside too? Nope.
Starting point is 00:58:21 Oh, interesting. Yeah. It's so forgettable inside yeah they put a big tray in your car or on the roof yeah tray in your car that stretches from window to window oh that's cool that is pretty like a bathtub yeah it's like a bathtub table it is like a bathtub eating a hamburger in a bathtub oh god wouldn't get anybody. Oh, my God. I'm like, logistically, it doesn't work at all. Yeah. Because you got to, what am I?
Starting point is 00:58:50 You have to keep your hands dry. But am I also like running the bath and then. Being full. But then going over to pick up the burger and then coming back. Yeah. It's maybe a two person operation. Yeah, you get someone else. Someone else is caring for you
Starting point is 00:59:05 and getting the burger so am I infirm at this point yeah and helping you into the bath yeah but of course
Starting point is 00:59:13 it's one of those baths that has a door on it so I have to you have to get in and then fill it up yeah yeah they don't tell you that
Starting point is 00:59:21 but you you gotta assume yeah well no unless you're the kind of person who, also you have to drain it fully. Yep. Yeah. Yep.
Starting point is 00:59:30 Or just open the door and deal with that. Yeah. Get on the floor. Everybody walk the dinosaur. Nice. Have you guys seen, this is not that related, but that, oh, I'm so bad at thinking of the different names of things. That show where the people are leftovers.
Starting point is 00:59:46 Yes. Oh. Where the people are leftovers. That show with the clusters covered in chocolate. Chocolate clusters. Yeah. Yeah, I've seen a season and a half of it. Okay.
Starting point is 01:00:01 Then you maybe haven't seen this part, but there's this amazing part where somebody, the main guy. Justin Theroux. Justin Theroux. Theroux? Sure. He is in a bathtub and he's shocked to be in the bath
Starting point is 01:00:15 and he's frazzled and he slides out of the bath. Like he doesn't get up and get out of the bath. He like flops and slides out like a fish. Multiple times this happens. But over the edge? Over the edge. doesn't get up and get out of the bath he like flops and slides out like a fish multiple times this happens but over the edge over the edge he just slides his bare body over the edge of the tub and onto the floor i gotta watch this show he's doing this on purpose or he's doing it on purpose he's like oh i'm in the bathtub well i can't tell you why really like no you trust me i've tried watching the show twice and haven't made it past
Starting point is 01:00:45 mid season two I don't think I like it fair enough um but I'm interested about these bathtubs it's really crazy he flops out like a fish
Starting point is 01:00:53 in the most unhuman way flaps around on the floor yeah it's really shocking um have you seen I've seen behind the scenes footage of Emily Blunt
Starting point is 01:01:02 uh doing a big bathtub stunt in uh Mary Poppins. Oh, that's fun. Interesting. She goes down the drain. Does she? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:12 I feel like bath day on the set is fun. Oh, yeah. Or imagine hungover day on set, like your character's in bed all day. Yeah. Oh, sick in bed. That'd be really good. That would be really good. Yeah, just like sports day when you're a kid. Yeah. Yay, bathtub day. Yeah. Oh, sick in bed. That'd be really good. That would be really good. Like,
Starting point is 01:01:25 yeah, just like sports day when you're a kid. Yeah. Yay. Bathtub day. Yeah. Yeah. Like,
Starting point is 01:01:30 like I was going to say that it's probably a thing that they have on Paddington bathtub day, but, um, I'm sure every day on Paddington, it's just a joy. Yeah. Oh my God.
Starting point is 01:01:41 The guy rules. Yeah. I should go to the store around that. No gas station. Wouldn't I? The other the store and rent that. No, gas station. Wouldn't I? The other ones didn't have it. So the other thing, because it was my nephew's fourth birthday,
Starting point is 01:01:52 I didn't buy him, his name's Mason. I didn't buy him anything. Cause my idea was when he gets here, I will like take him to the toy store and I'll let him pick out whatever he wants. And so I was like really setting myself up here for God knows what he was going to figure out. What if he would get himself a Power Wheels? He could have gotten a Power Wheels.
Starting point is 01:02:13 Those stuffies are so expensive. Oh, yeah. Did you go to a toy store at Granville Island? It's this similar kind of setup. Okay. Yeah. I just went there today. The place is called Caboodles. Okay. Yeah. I just went there today. Um, the place is called caboodles.
Starting point is 01:02:25 Oh, okay. So I took him to caboodles and I said, whatever you want. And then I was like, as soon as I said, I was like, this is a mistake.
Starting point is 01:02:32 This is a mistake. This is a mistake. I want that friend's puzzle in the window. I want to work here. Yeah. Do you mind if he goes by the counter, just scans a couple of things, but he walked immediately over to something.
Starting point is 01:02:46 It was one of the cheapest things in the place. And he was like this. And it was like a little gun, like bubble gun. And I was like, oh, he doesn't really touch the balloon there. You would have lived for it. Yeah, that's true. Also, if he got a giant stuffy that he couldn't fit home on the airplane. But yeah, it was a lot of fun. he couldn't fit home on the airplane um but yeah it was a lot of fun he bring his gun on the airplane oh yeah that's a good question yeah but i think he was uh playing with it for like a day and then
Starting point is 01:03:16 i feel like maybe kids just get tired of yeah after a day it's true also it's very overwhelming uh to like when you're a kid and a very young kid and you get a bunch of toys as presents and you're like i don't want to keep opening presents i want to play with this toy yeah yeah but it's amazing how like cheap a thing can keep a kid occupied for hours yeah yeah we are now at the point with my kids that we're sort of out of the woods for just like a toy. Okay, good. I mean, the things that they want are more expensive. Yeah, that's true.
Starting point is 01:03:49 But they're not like a thing they play with for a day and keep forever. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm trying to think of what would be that. Something like sunglasses. Give me some cool sunglasses as a present. My kids want pencil skirts. They want all just kind of
Starting point is 01:04:05 business office style Von Dutch hats. She's all over the place. Well, should we move on to some overheards? Sure. Hi, this is Lori Kilmartin. And I'm
Starting point is 01:04:22 Jackie Kishin. And we have a podcast called The Jackie and Lori Show on MaxFun, and it's very exciting because what do we talk about? Comedy. Stand-up comedy. We both do stand-up comedy and have since the dawn of Christ. Well, Jackie. Is that offensive?
Starting point is 01:04:34 It is offensive to me because you've aged me. We started in the late 80s, and we're still here. You can't kill us. So go to The Jackie and Lori laurie show on max fun and listen to that the jackie and laurie show new episodes monday only on maximum fun greatest trek is the podcast for all your modern star trek needs it It's funny, informative, and now it's also timely. That's because every Friday right after the release of a new episode of Strange New Worlds, Picard, Lower Decks, Discovery, or Prodigy, we bring you a review of that episode.
Starting point is 01:05:16 There's some great new Star Trek coming up and we're going to cover all of it. You'll like our show because we're both former video producers, so we bring a lot of insight into the production and filmmaking aspects to these episodes. And we also have a very refined sense of humor, so we make lots of delightful fart jokes along the way. So come see why Greatest Trek is one of the most popular television recap podcasts on
Starting point is 01:05:36 all of the internet. Subscribe to Greatest Trek at MaximumFun.org or in the podcast app you're using right now. Overheard. Overheard. It's a segment where if you hear it out there, we want to in here,
Starting point is 01:05:54 and we always like to start with the guest. Dornan? Yeah. Do you have an overheard? I do. This is one that is something I heard, and it is also a dream in a way. Somebody else's dream.
Starting point is 01:06:06 Okay. Because I heard my boyfriend sleep talking. Oh. This was like a year and a half, two years ago now. But it was one of those things that I'll never forget. And basically, he was asleep. And he said, go, go, get him, Spider-Man. You can do anything and then he changed his voice
Starting point is 01:06:29 and said i know come on spider-man you can do anything i know no shit dude i'm freaking in Spider-Man it was really amazing and I'm so happy that I woke up and heard the whole thing crystal clear yeah it was really good wow wow wow
Starting point is 01:06:52 and he sleep talks a lot but lots of it's mumbly and like this was like a scene yeah I love that that's so funny
Starting point is 01:06:58 it was so good come on Spider-Man it's true I do love the dream of like cheering on Spider-Man. I do love the dream of cheering on Spider-Man. Yeah, like you're not Spider-Man. You're just like a guy who's like, go. Oh, I had the craziest dream last night when Spider-Man was there.
Starting point is 01:07:22 And I had to go back to work after. Yeah, I was just getting my lunch, brother. But he really needed me to pump his tires. So I was like, yeah, you can do that. All right, see ya. Because there are people like that in Spider-Man City or whatever, New York. Yeah, for sure. Because he's going building to building. So if someone's on the other edge of town being like, all right, go get him, Spider-Man.
Starting point is 01:07:39 I have no idea what he's doing right now. Yeah. I'll hopefully see it in the newspaper tomorrow. have no idea what he's doing right now yeah i'll hopefully see it in the newspaper tomorrow it's funny like when you picture when you see spider-man in a movie he's endlessly going from like high rise to high rise but there's a lot of new york that's just like brownstones that are three or four stories yeah there should be more hopping from what or from what is it called from oh you know when i was when you're about to the leftovers yeah if i would have just said what i was thinking there it would have just been perfect yeah yeah yeah no i i forget those
Starting point is 01:08:13 words but you can't explain that to the audience but like oh shit the stairs like stoops yeah yeah stoop why does Spider-Man go on any stoop hopping from stoop to stoop yeah from little lion statue to lion statue
Starting point is 01:08:31 yeah yeah anyways he can do it yeah he can do anything I believe in you Spider-Man I believe in you Spider-Man Dave do you have one over yeah I think I do
Starting point is 01:08:43 I was at the park oh let's call it yesterday okay sure Uh, Dave, do you have one over? Yeah, I think I do. Um, I was at the park. Oh, let's call it yesterday. Okay. Sure. Um, and, uh, the park has, uh, like a playground area. This park rules. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:01 Got a playground area, a big playground area and a little kid playground area behind the little kid playground area, a sandy area. And in the sandy area, there's also a water area. Wow. Where there's like a. This is a mega. A pump or fountain that you can turn on and water goes down kind of like a river into the sandy area. That's amazing. Cool.
Starting point is 01:09:19 You can make little rivers and lakes. Yeah. And so there was a group of kids and they were turning the water on. And they put their hand over the water so it sprayed everywhere. And they chanted all together, daddy piss, daddy piss. That's amazing. Yeah. You know what this looks like?
Starting point is 01:09:43 Daddy piss. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My daddy goes the same way. Sprays everywhere like that as well. Oh, I love it. Daddy piss. Yeah. Incorrigible.
Starting point is 01:09:54 Oh, and just like the age you are when you discover you could call it piss. Not me, man. I'm still wee-wee. Pardon me. I have to go wee-wee. Pardon me. I have to go wee-wee. That is better than saying I have to go piss. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:11 Something very aggressive about it. I'm just going to go to the bathroom. You don't need to know what I'm doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe I'll just wash my hands. You know, freshen up. Got to go. My overheard.
Starting point is 01:10:22 Yes. Is somebody, I feel like they were in the midst of explaining some hippie store because i just heard them say you know jewelry dream catchers that type of shit yeah so right i think that's what they were talking about? Yeah, my business plan. And I've told you, I said on this show before, and it's still happening, that I accidentally clicked on a woman that had white dreads.
Starting point is 01:10:53 She's a white woman with dreads. And now I've advertised a nonstop parade of white women with dreads. Oh, not just like products so you can become a white woman. No, it's just, oh, maybe actually
Starting point is 01:11:02 there was one that I, and I keep clicking on them and it just keeps causing the problem. And I, but they all look very happy. Yeah. Pretty satisfied.
Starting point is 01:11:11 Well, that's delusional. Yeah. That's delusional. Yeah, they're not listening to anyone. But wouldn't that be great to just like go and live on an island and be like,
Starting point is 01:11:18 Oh, yeah. Yeah. I don't care about whatever. I don't care about anybody. I'm alive. Yeah. Yeah. I'm on island time. Yeah.'t care about anybody. I'm alive. Yeah. Yeah. I'm on island time.
Starting point is 01:11:27 Yeah. Oh, man. Yeah. That's what Jimmy Buffo is all about. Rest in peace. Nobody's been able to push a song as far as he managed to get with that one song. Margarotaville? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:42 Margaronaville? He also had a cheeseburger in paradise oh yeah but still same genre yeah he was a billionaire
Starting point is 01:11:50 he became a billionaire from that and you know what we wish him the best oh wait I'm sorry he's dead but oh I wonder what
Starting point is 01:12:00 the editorial cartoon of him going you know where they do like the person arriving at heaven's Gate. What is he doing? Oh, yeah. Is he getting a cheeseburger?
Starting point is 01:12:08 Or he's like, your margarita, sir. Oh, sure. Yeah. Or like. But he's in hell. He's not. Yeah. And then or he's going to Wendy's and he's like, this actually is paradise already.
Starting point is 01:12:20 I could have been having this the whole time. This little kid's popped up on my tiktok now who like is a psychic and like sees sees the afterlife oh this is great i don't want to click on it but i want to know everything i really am happy that this is now part something that i see but he describes it like like really in detail about how you go into supernovas and you're flying through space and time and then you're in heaven and even if you're a bad person when once you're in heaven you don't feel that way anymore oh really is that true yep it's true whoa yeah and he says you could go to hell you could go to heaven but if even if you were a bad person and you and you decide to go to heaven you no longer are bad oh okay i choose
Starting point is 01:13:00 heaven yeah i'm gonna choose heaven and then all of a sudden and he said you don't feel that way anymore which is you don't feel that way anymore, which is interesting. You don't want to listen to rock and roll anymore. Yeah. You put that down. Interesting. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:10 Okay. You don't want to do tagging anymore. I am. It's good rules. Yeah. Wasn't there. Maybe I want to die now. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:18 There was a book. Oh man. It's same kind of thing. It's about a kid that said that heaven is called heaven is real. Heaven is for real. Heaven is real. Yeah. And like, heaven's the same kind of thing as about a kid that said that heaven is real. Heaven is for real? Heaven is real, yeah. Heaven's for real. You know, kids can just make shit up for hours.
Starting point is 01:13:32 My nephew was telling me how his eyes got burned by a stove and he had to get new eyes at Costco. Oh my God. That's crazy. I got bad news. He's not going to heaven. That's an absolute lie. That's a lie. He's lying. He's not going to heaven. That's an absolute lie. That's a lie. He's lying.
Starting point is 01:13:46 He's a liar. And he has deviled eggs for eyes now. Yeah. Did his eyes smell weird? Yeah. They look weird. That's why I brought it up. What's going on with your eyes?
Starting point is 01:13:56 Well, let me tell you. Yeah. Don't eat those deviled eggs backstage. Now, we also have overheards sent in to us from people all over the world if you want to send one in cool sorry sorry you were doing that was cool graham's on autopilot now don't bother on autopilot yeah i just think it's really cool that people send them in and you guys have like spies on the ground floor of earth yeah yeah yeah yeah got them working everywhere on the ground floor of earth spying for
Starting point is 01:14:25 god in heaven yeah i heard that heaven is real you know i hear it's okay like uh even if you're a bad person you won't be bad anymore yeah you get to choose honestly that's how i feel about myself every day i'm like oh maybe today i won't be a bad person anything can happen totally Anything can happen. Totally. If you want to send one in to us, you can send it in to spy at maximumfun.org. And this first one is from Chris in Toronto. I passed two rough-looking dudes drinking on a patio.
Starting point is 01:14:59 They seemed to be having lively discussion about whose life was going better. As I walked by, one of them was shaking a cd at the other and saying sure but i get to go home after this and have a nice evening with serena rider oh wow that's a very specific yeah she toronto shantus she's a canadian singer songwriter um yeah very talented great voice yeah 90s no no like probably uh you know uh right around 2012 when you were uh yeah yeah she probably you were popping collars yeah she's probably putting out stompa around then yeah stompa your feet you know that one yeah yeah alright yeah that's a good one yeah um
Starting point is 01:15:46 so your album's out as we speak out as we speak will you be shaking a CD I will be shaking a CD or will there be physical copies I decided to get some CDs
Starting point is 01:15:57 because my dad said that I should get some CDs I said okay yeah sure yeah okay boomer yeah
Starting point is 01:16:03 but it is fun it is fun to have yeah yeah it's like an artifact you know I'm so
Starting point is 01:16:10 I'm so I'm so pushed by the winds of others of dad yeah and others
Starting point is 01:16:17 because I was gonna make I was considering making records but then someone responded to my Instagram story and said that's actually toxic
Starting point is 01:16:24 they're toxic and I said okay okay okay but a CD no problem no problem nothing toxic in there But then someone responded to my Instagram story and said, that's actually toxic. They're toxic. And I said, okay, okay, okay. But a CD? No problem. No problem. Nothing toxic in there. And you can make it, you can put it in plastic.
Starting point is 01:16:33 You can do all that. But it's not like you're not flushing records down the toilet or something. Like they're in your house. It's the process. It's toxic? It is. Oh, the toxic. Okay. And I guess it may be even toxic.
Starting point is 01:16:44 I mean, I feel bad letting everybody know this. Yeah. People are going to go about their life no matter what. Not me. Apparently, even the record Scratching, you know, is releasing some toxic stuff. Microvinyls into my collection? I don't know. Don't worry about it.
Starting point is 01:17:00 I don't. Would you be... I've always thought of this about releasing an album. Being so stoked if somebody used it and like mixed sampled it yeah sampled it yeah that would be really cool
Starting point is 01:17:10 that would be fun you know what the best part would be the money the money I just want the dollars to roll in it's cool I have like on my site now
Starting point is 01:17:19 I made mugs too and CDs and you got mugs? yeah I got some mugs hell yeah what's on i got some uh oh yeah what do you get offended album cover do you get offended if people are like uh one mug please no cd no i think like i don't know anybody with a cd player so i'm not offended if nobody buys them everybody uses mugs everybody uses mugs so i will be really offended if everybody doesn't get one mugs is that smart
Starting point is 01:17:44 they're cute yeah what do you put in a mug coffee yeah maybe hot chocolate during the winter oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah that's it for me yeah i'll have i'll use one mug a day oh and yeah anything else every other fluid do you drink water out of a mug i out of a water bottle but it's very unholy unless it's hot water with a little bit of lemon. Yes, that's fine. And some honey. And maybe a shot of whiskey for daddy. Yeah, hot toddy. Speaking of sampling, there's a poet in town,
Starting point is 01:18:16 well-known poet named Shane Koizan. What if you had said someone else's name? You'd be like, ooh. But he went on tour in europe and he didn't know but one of his poems was sampled in a very like goth rock song and so all the people that showed up were these like like very painted very you know like corsets and all that kind of and then he's reading sad poems about assisted suicide. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:47 That's amazing. Um, uh, this next one comes from Rob, uh, in West London. I was walking recently in a fancy neighborhood in West London. I don't spend a lot of time in and had to do a double take at the name of a
Starting point is 01:19:02 restaurant. That name Borscht and tears i don't get it i don't get it either is it some is it like that that tutor joke we didn't get because it's right uh what's borscht what's borscht and something what's ever borscht and something but also how do you pronounce borscht as a british person boy boy is it like borscht what what what do we ever say that's something in tears blood and tears no sweat oh it's blood sweat and tears but borscht in tears the tears. But borscht in tears? The letter N. So borscht in tears. Oh, borscht and tears.
Starting point is 01:19:46 Borscht. Oh, okay. Huh. But maybe, yeah. Maybe onions, like from cutting onions? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:19:55 Are there a lot of onions in borscht? No, that doesn't make any sense. I think it's more beets. Right, yeah. Yeah. There's some onions in there. Oh, yeah. You got to.
Starting point is 01:20:02 How about, or is this a bad name for a Forge restaurant? Abortion Clinic. Is it a bad name? Was that the question? That's a good name for it. Forged in clinic. This last one comes from Doug F. Is it Doug Fuck?
Starting point is 01:20:21 It's Doug Fuck. Hi, Doug Fuck, big fan. I was hiking in Maine over Is it Doug Fuck? It's Doug Fuck. Hi, Doug Fuck, big fan. I was hiking in Maine over the weekend. We rounded a corner on a trail at the same time as two other hikers coming the opposite way just as one of them was telling her friend I live by the stars and fuck
Starting point is 01:20:38 by the moon. That's cool. That's pretty good. If you're going have one if you're gonna have a credo yeah i guess i live by whatever's on tv from 9 to 9 30 and i fuck by whatever's on tv at 9 30 both of them are ncis i live by the first half of NCIS. Oh, I watched an ad for the Frasier reboot. I don't know, man. Yeah, I don't either.
Starting point is 01:21:12 Is it the same guy? Frasier? I mean, that's a good question, but I just didn't imagine the possibility. Who would be the new Frasier? Oh, my God. Josh Gad? Josh Who would be the new Frasier? Oh, my God. Josh Gad? Josh Gad would be perfect. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:21:31 Oh, man. The young Frasier Chronicles. Yeah. Oh, my God. It's just Frasier and then everyone else. Oh, Roz is back. Roz is back. And he's living, I think, with his son who is a firefighter.
Starting point is 01:21:50 Cool. So they've switched. His dad was a cop. Now his son's a firefighter, but he's same old Frazier. No. Um, nope. No, thanks. There was one thing I liked that was rebooted.
Starting point is 01:22:03 Cause I, a few weeks ago we talked about this and I I said nothing that's ever been rebooted has ever been good. Sex and the City? No. Oh. But I can't remember what it was. But I do remember at one time thinking, ah, darn it, I do like this one rebooted thing. Was it a movie or a TV show? Ah, darn it, darn it, no, darn it.
Starting point is 01:22:19 Darn, darn, darn, darn. What I like, I really like when a movie uh doesn't really they do a sequel uh 20 years too late yeah yeah beetlejuice 2 is on the horizon it must be so sad to be working on something like that no i bet it's fine you think well it's sort of like bath though yeah everybody's excited they get to see the same. Yeah. Yeah. But like I watched the flash, the movie and Michael Keaton as Batman is in that. It was the most fun.
Starting point is 01:22:53 It was great. Yeah. Another dose of Michael Keaton as Batman. Yeah. Yes, please. In addition to overhers that are written in, we also accept your phone calls. If you want to call us,
Starting point is 01:23:01 our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one. Ugh. SpyPod 1, like these people have. Hi Dave. Hi Graham. Hi funny, funny guest. This is Kyle calling from Edmonton, Alberta. I was just at lunch and sitting beside a table of four people in their 20s. I wasn't picking up a conversation until I started to leave and then I heard one of them say,
Starting point is 01:23:23 and then you get really sick right after. What did you say? 40 pierogies? Well, thank you. Bye. 40 pierogies. How many do you think you can eat in one sitting? Oh, at least 20.
Starting point is 01:23:38 At least 20. Yeah. In college, I would do between two and three dozen. Pierogies are amazing. Yeah. They're amazing. They go down easy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:47 They're small enough that you can eat a lot of them. Yep. But they also fill you up. Yep. So I don't know how many I could do in one sitting. I bet you I could do 12. I was very late to perogies as a Ukrainian Canadian. I don't think I had them until college.
Starting point is 01:24:03 Oh, wow. And I didn't know what to do with them. Yeah. And so I would put ketchup on them. Oh, Canadian. I don't think I had them until college. Oh, wow. And I didn't know what to do with them. Yeah. And so I would put ketchup on them. Oh, sure. Do you guys like them grilled or just boiled? Boil and fry, yeah. Boil and fry.
Starting point is 01:24:12 Yeah, boil and fry. And it's got to be, you got to have onions in there. Caramelized onions? Yes, please. Yeah. I love them just boiled, too. My dad said he used to have them growing up and they would boil them on the first day and fry them on the second day.
Starting point is 01:24:24 Oh, yeah. That makes a lot of sense. Oh, yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Oh, fun. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah. There's the prior maintenance woman of our building lives in our building and she makes pierogies. We've had the benefit of some of her toil. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:43 Yeah, it's fucking amazing. Have you ever gone to the Ukrainian church first Friday of the month? toil. So, yeah. Yeah, it's fucking amazing. Have you ever gone to the Ukrainian church first Friday of the month? Yeah. Pierogi Fest? Pierogi and... Cubasa, they would call it.
Starting point is 01:24:55 Kielbasa? Yeah, kielbasa. And cabbage rolls. Oh, yeah. Nothing but the best. It rules. Next phone call. Try not to throw up
Starting point is 01:25:04 from 40 pierogies. Hey, Dave and Graham. This is Tyler from Albuquerque. And I'm getting ready to go for a bike ride out in the garage before I put my bike shoes on and was cutting my toenails. And as I'm cutting my toenails, I see an ant walking away with one of my toenails. Off I go. Arachnophobia. Oh man,
Starting point is 01:25:36 that, uh, that is really some peaks and valleys in there. That was really good. For a bike ride. Got to put on my bike riding shoes. But first, interesting man.
Starting point is 01:25:45 Yeah, he does. He sounds like, he seems complex. Yeah. Yeah. I went bike riding the other day. Went past Graham. Yeah. I don't have bike riding shoes.
Starting point is 01:25:56 And in fact, the bike I bought was very cheap. And it had the like things that the little. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Little toe guys. Footholds. Yeah. And I just don't use the money yeah
Starting point is 01:26:06 yeah it's a pretty serious biker city hey oh yeah man yeah and you know what bikes they come and go you go you get one it gets stolen you get another one is regina a big biking town no no it's weird because it's so flat yeah i guess it's it's just very much a car and truck town. Like, nobody walks anywhere for the most part, you know. Past guest Paul Anthony was talking about how in Winnipeg, every winter or every spring, the snow would melt and you'd get a new bike. Oh, wow. Because you just find bikes that have been buried in snow for four months. Have you seen the videos of these kids in New York? And I think in Toronto, where they're riding like a BMX bike on one wheel.
Starting point is 01:26:49 Oh, yeah. And they're zipping in and out of traffic. Yep. Yep. They're doing that in Toronto downtown on the streets. It's sick. It's sick. You shouldn't be doing that.
Starting point is 01:27:00 But in a cool way. It's so cool. It's sick. It's absolutely precious. It's actually crazy what people do. I know. But it's like, it's absolutely precious it's actually crazy what people do i know but it's like it's cool to be able to do that and i would want to show it off if i knew how to ride on one wheel like that but it's too easy to just spin out and then oh yeah flopped into the other lane and then oh my god this is are you a biker usually all this like lingo. Spin out and flop.
Starting point is 01:27:25 Yeah. Anyways, I see it. It makes me instantly nervous. You know, like, you know, when you see a dog running too close to traffic, I'm like, no! Don't even joke about that. Yeah, exactly. Here's your next phone call. Final phone call. Hey there.
Starting point is 01:27:40 This is Lexi. She heard calling in from Chicago. I was just walking home along the street with a lot of outdoor restaurants. And as I passed one of the patios, I heard a group of women placing their orders. And one of them said to the other, oh, yeah, you're a dirty little mashed potato slut, aren't you? No friggin' way. Love you guys. Thanks.
Starting point is 01:27:58 This just occurred to me. We had two potato over her. Wow. Yeah. Good. Good for one. I think we've all gone too far with this whole slut thing it's true what does it even mean anymore yeah no you're not a dirty little potato
Starting point is 01:28:14 slut no you can just eat a potato you can just eat 40 pierogies with that yeah what do you prefer mashed potatoes or pierogi oh don't make't make me choose. It depends on, totally depends on what day, what else is going on. It's Thanksgiving Day. Oh. Potatoes. Yeah. Because the thing, you can fry pierogis, but also frying mashed potatoes. Man, oh man.
Starting point is 01:28:39 Yeah. Good? Delicious. I don't know. Make it a little crunchy. That's amazing. I've never had it. It's kind of like the thing you do the next day. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, there's another, they don't know i've never make a little crunchy that's amazing i've never had it it's kind of like the thing you do the next day yeah yeah oh there's no they don't survive though yeah they just it's a one-time show i love i love a mashed potato yeah me too yeah
Starting point is 01:28:55 you know what's really good which i'm excited to make again this fall shepherd's pie oh yeah i make a vegetarian shepherd's pie then you can just make a big batch of potatoes you can just put them all over it yeah it's just great if i'm thinking of if i'm make a vegetarian shepherd's pie. Then you can just make a big batch of potatoes. You can just put them all over it. Yeah. It's just great if I'm thinking of if I'm right about what shepherd's pie is. Potato. Vegetable. Stuff. Potato. Potato. Meat.
Starting point is 01:29:16 Yeah. Yeah. But not the vegetarian kind. Yeah. Yeah. Yum. Everybody out there I challenge you. Make the best shepherd's pie you possibly can. Make it. Jordan, thank you for being our guest. Thanks for having me. It was so much fun.
Starting point is 01:29:31 Your album, I Can Explain. Uh-huh. You can get it right now. Get it. Get it. Get it. Get it. On all the things.
Starting point is 01:29:37 Everything. CDs, tapes, mugs. Get it. Get a mug and put it up to your ear. Yeah. And you can hear the ocean. Yep. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:29:46 CD's nuts. And you're also, speaking of recording, you're recording a Just for Laughs original. And where is that taking place? Where could people go if they wanted to see that? They can try their best and knock down the door. It's Second City in Toronto, but I think it is sold out already. Okay. Cool.
Starting point is 01:30:03 Good for you. Good for you, though. Yeah. Yeah, thanks. It should be fun. Yeah, they're neat. They're a neat thing to do. It's interesting, yeah. Because when I was starting stand-up, the only
Starting point is 01:30:16 thing you could do was do a half-hour show on TV. On a salmon-colored stage. And now you can just do a seven-minute thing. Yeah, and my understanding is they do like a seven minute thing. Yeah. Yeah. And my understanding is they only own it for like six months or something. Oh,
Starting point is 01:30:31 just enough time for me to sample it. Yeah. Yeah. Go to Germany. See what they think of you over there. Well, thank you for being our guest. You guys are awesome. Thanks.
Starting point is 01:30:39 Thank you out there for listening to the podcast. We think you're awesome too. And, well, not that one of you. Yeah. You know who I'm talking about. You don't get anything. I don't really get. I was talking about Napoleon Dynamite. I know I was. And I was talking about stoops. Yeah, she knew it. I knew it. You didn't. And yeah, come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Maximum Fun.
Starting point is 01:31:22 A worker-owned network of artist-owned shows supported directly by you.

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