Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 845 - John Cullen

Episode Date: May 28, 2024

Comedian John Cullen returns to talk Broomgate, re-watching movies, and breaking a computer.

Hi, he's Dave Schumke. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 845 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name's Graham Clark. With me is always this man who's always working for the weekend, Mr. Dave Schumke. Yeah, this is an absolute weekend cast.

We've been totally weekend-pilled and you know what's going on at my kid's school today? Cheap wing day. It's cheap wing day. Yeah, they get 10 cent wings and cheap pitchers as well. Oh, that's pretty good. Yeah, it's wing Wednesday on a Friday. No, it's activity day. Oh, shit.

Okay. What we used to call sports day. Yeah. Is there still hot dogs involved? I don't know. No, I don't believe there's a hot dog involved. I used to remember, I still remember, it used to happen, sports day, you would divide up your school into four colors.

Yeah. You'd wear pivvies. You'd wear, well, you could bring a t-shirt of that color. Well, you could bring a T-shirt of that. You can bring a shirt shirt shirt. And then you'd play a bunch of stupid events. Three legged race. Yeah. Egg on spoon. And my favorite was everyone put your shoes in a pile

and then race to the pile of shoes and put your shoes back on. That's kind of that gets set to set up for adults, when you go to like a party or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then some kid would always kick the pile of shoes and send them everywhere. That rules. And then you take a break and you get a hot dog and a long john. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Delicious. The two longest delicious foods. Yeah. I would actually try to make a human chain of, or I guess not human. Some sort of hot dog centipede. And then they send you home. It's truly like the welcome to summer vacation. The next six weeks are bullshit. Bullshit, the garbage.

Our guest today, returning guest here to the podcast, is a podcaster himself. He hosts a show called Blocked Party, What Is, a Jeopardy podcast, and the very popular Broomgate, a curling scandal. It's John Cullen, everyone. Hello, John. Hello. Thank you guys for having me back and thank you for reminding me of sports day. What a great time. I love the idea of, you know, let's have a hot dog and a long John

and then run around. Yeah. Let's run around a lot with just that flopping everywhere. I think that was probably also what professional athletes were eating at the time as well. That's true. Probably true, yeah. They're trying to recreate performance state.

I know that Wayne Gretzky's pregame routine was always a can of Diet Coke. Sure. That sounds like Princess Di's pregame routine as well. Just have a diet Coke and we'll all have a good time. Well, Princess Di and Wingresky had similar hairstyles. They did a similar, similar physiques, really similar cheekbones. And yeah, gosh, he's he's one of our finest.

He's one of our greatest all-time guys. I mean, you wouldn't get many arguments there. No, that's true. John, was sports day in your neck of the woods that you grew up in, was it much the same or does it vary? It was a similar, yeah, I grew up in Southern Ontario, very similar. My one prevailing sports day memory is I remember one year a

kid who was not particularly athletic spent the entire day making some sort of like drink concoction with all the snacks that they were offering at sports day. So I think it had like freezies in it and chips and maybe a piece of hot dog. I don't remember. I just I I remember I got, yeah, just a little, just a little hot dog on a toothpick sticking in the top, the real cap on the concoction martini. And it was, if it was tied at the end of the day, the team that drank it wins.

Well, I drank it and I've never, I was dared to drink it. And I remember taking one sip and it tasted exactly like puke. Oh, never. And I've never been like, I didn't know that you could just like mix enough foods to recreate the taste of puke, but they did it. So good for them. Yeah.

A sports day miracle. If you ask me. It's like on Top Chef, your mystery ingredient today is puke. It's puke. I would love to see how they combine that with filet mignon. We're making a deconstructed puke. But if it's like a gastronomy thing where it goes in, it tastes like puke. But when it comes out, it tastes like filet mignon. Tastes like food.

Yeah. Oh. One of those tricks. That's interesting. I was telling my children some candy secrets. Some candy lore. Wait, wait, wait. Let's get to know us.

Let's go to know us. Get to know us. Let's hear some of these candy secrets. Well, like, these are all things I think I've heard this, like, they're all just like Reddit posts that were like, today I learned the M&Ms started in the war. Or but like, yeah, I think M&Ms were a thing that were like, we they needed to create something that wouldn't melt a chocolate that wouldn't melt. And then the other one was that like Hershey, Hershey chocolate, they had an original recipe.

Yes. And then they changed it for, because they needed, they put it in like soldiers packs in one of the world wars. Yeah. And so they added some kind of acid to it, which is the same. Nutric acid. It's the same one that's in your stomach. Yeah.

And it, and so now you can kind of taste like it. Once you've heard this story, you'll be like, oh, I do this tastes a bit like barf. Yeah. I just love that that was your, when you said candy secrets, I thought it was gonna be like, if you combine this candy and this candy,

it's really delicious. And you're like, If you eat pop rocks and drink Coke, you'll die. Yeah, your stomach. Yeah, exactly. But instead it was like, did you know that M&Ms were invented in the war? I can only imagine how well your daughter

stuck that information in. Well, they consider me the modern Mark Summers. I'm always giving them insider information about food. What would be candy secrets? Like you can bite both ends off a Twizzler and use it as a straw. Use it as a straw. Yeah, that's a good one.

You can take one of those craft caramel squares and really use it as like a silly putty. You could probably roll it around on a piece of newspaper and it would transfer to it. Cheaper silly putty, I guess. I'm like a big freezing guy. I feel like that would be, you know, if you freeze certain like chocolate bars. I love freezing Girl Guide cookies.

Oh, yeah. Feel like maybe that's a bit of a... Do you freeze your chocolate or you just cool? Because I put it in the fridge, but I've never thought about putting it in the freezer. Love to have my chocolate in the fridge, which is a real source of contention in my household because my wife does not like cold chocolate, but I do. But then yeah, certain things I like to freeze, like freezing anything that has like a caramel, like freezing like a Rollo or something like that.

Very damn. I want to roll out right now. Now that you've mentioned them. What about is it? Which kind of girl guy cookies are you freezing? Both. Okay. I freeze the traditional and the mint. We have some traditionals if anyone wants to buy some. Oh, are your daughters, are guides? Yeah, one of them is an ember, which is the new brownies. They've changed brownies to embers. What? Why did they do that?

I don't know why, but the uniforms aren't brown anymore. I think the name may be derived from that. Oh. And then there was a- Also brownies are bad for you and they've kind of gotten a bad rep over the years of being not so healthy. Yeah.

And then, so now the brownie uniform, it used to be a brown dress with a little scarf. Now it's just a navy blue t-shirt-shirt with you can wear the scarf or not Or you don't even have to wear your t-shirt there. Just show up The scarf though is part of the fun. Isn't it to wear the scarf seems like yes. Were you a scout John? No, I never did I never did the thing. I just I feel like I was already such a loser I just, I feel like I was already such a loser that I just couldn't be, I couldn't be more of a loser. Like it was just, I can't wear a hat.

Cause it was beavers, I guess, where my, you know, was where it started when I was a kid. And you had to wear the, like the, the bucket hat with the like beaver tail on it. I was like, I can't guys, I can't be more of a loser. I just can't. Was that your parents call? Like, ah, John's already kind of a loser. My dad was like, son, you cannot join the Beavers. Okay, I'm sorry. Graham, you were a Cub, right?

I was a Cub Scout, yeah. Yeah, so was I. And it was back when it was a gray uniform with so many components. Green hat, little scarf, gray shirt, gray uniform, with so many components. Green hat, little scarf, gray shirt, gray shorts, gray socks with a little garter. Oh, I didn't have the socks with the garter. That's one step beyond.

Because the garter had a little flag, the color of your whatever group you were in. Your six, I think was it what you called the six? I don't know, because there was- Cause there was like a with end or something. Wasn't it like a. Yeah, there was a den. There was a wolf den. Yeah.

Um, but, uh, yeah. And that you, the colors available were like red, gold, green, and tawny. I always thought it was funny that one of the colors was tawny. Is, did you have like the sash thing too? Did the guys do the sash with the badge or is that just a girl thing? I don't know. Did we sew our badges right on our shirts? That's what we did.

We had badges just sewn on your stretchy gray shirt. Yeah. It makes it hard to hand it down to a younger sibling or it's like they had a cheat code. Yeah, exactly. They come in swinging. Did you like it? Like what did you like being in? No, no, it wasn't a question of like it just was.

I did it. Yeah, I did it. But then scouts I didn't go along with, but then I had friends that were scouts and one of whom got the keys to the secret scout hall that then we would use to go drinking and. At what age? 16, 15, 16. Oh, you were still scouting at that age.

No, they were scouts and then they become cadets. Oh, yes. Yep. Cadets related to it. Yeah. Or scouting rovers was after scouting rovers. Yeah. Something like, was there like a guide maker or like pathfinder? related to it. Yeah. Or Scouts or Rovers was after Scouts. Rovers. Yeah.

Something like, was there like a guide maker or like pathfinder? Pathfinder. That's the girls, isn't it? Pathfinder, that's where guides become pathfinders. I think it's a Nissan SUV actually. It is also that for sure. Yeah.

Not me, man. I drive a juke. Ah, cool. That's sick, dude. John. Yes, Graham. You are now running three whole podcasts. Four if you count the POD cast, which is embarrassing, but yeah. What's the POD cast?

That's my new metal podcast. Oh, really? Nice. Yeah. Yeah. It's a once a month. Graham has actually been a guest on it. We listened to the WWF Forciblecible entry album, which is a rough album

title and rough album really to be fair. Yeah. Yeah. It was a mostly, uh, entry songs was what I think it was. I was like, uh, what if Kane's entrance music was done by finger 11th? Uh, but yeah, yeah, so yeah, four podcasts, it's kind of, it's dumb to do, but yeah, here we are, we're doing it. Yeah, you got a lot on your plate. I do, I'm busy, but it's good. I mean, I like it, I don't have to leave my house.

The one that's, I saw an ad for it during the hockey game last night. Yes. It's a CBC podcast and it's, it's an investigative show that you're doing and it's called broom gate. And it's about witches. It's a, it's a real deep dive into Hansel and

Gretel learning a lot about both of them. Yeah. It is, it is, yeah, as the, as the name suggests, it is a, it is a podcast about a curling scandal, which is real and involved a curling broom. And actually, I don't know if you guys saw this, but in your Facebook group, the day that broom gate came out, someone had like screen capped it and said, without listening to a second of the show, do we think this is real or fake? Which I thought was. You made it with Kelly and Kelly who have done fake podcasts before.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. This sounds serious, Dave, which of course, you know, you worked on and, and was, and was not, it was not real. It was not real. Uh, you know, and Pat Kelly famous for This Is That, which is also not real. Yeah.

Wait a minute. What, we're going back up there a second. This Is That was real. I used to listen to it every week. We would talk about the important stories to Canadians. Is, but Broomgate's not made up. This is a true- It is not made up. It is a real thing.

Curlers got very mad at each other over a, over a broom. What about it? Tell it I'm confused as hell. Okay. Okay. Yeah. I mean, I, you know, I know last time I was here, I talked about curling, so I didn't want to necessarily go too crazy here, but yeah, it was basically this new brand new broom company came on the market in 2010 they're called hard line.

And previous to that, it was sort of like like there were kind of three or four major broom companies No one was like I want a piece of the curling pie Okay, so and these are four companies that that's their sole they make really they make rooms Yeah, okay, just brooms or curling equipment. So shoes pants gloves, you know that kind of thing and then there's special curling pants I mean, they're basically there were in the days before lululemon Like oh we need a stretchy Kind of pant, you know to fit over. Who's the tea? Is it the Norwegians who always have funky pants? They yes the Norway team

They were the big they were the pants team. Yes Okay, they they borrowed they they ordered a lot of pants from John Daly's company, which is called Loudmouth golf. Is that right? Yeah. Yeah. Cause John Daly kind of got famous for wearing like Zubaz pants when he golfed. And then he was like, maybe I should make my own pants. And he would drink and smoke. Like he was like an invincible man. He still does it. He still does it. Yeah. He's in the PGA championship this week. Cause I think because he won it, he gets an exemption into it. And someone said that they followed him around the course all day and he smoked two full packs of cigarettes over the course of his round, uh, ate four Snickers bars and drank four diet cokes.

Nice. Oh, just like Wayne Gretzky. four diet cokes. Nice. Oh, just like Wayne Gretzky. He, he rules John Daly. What a guy. I read his autobiography and he really is just like how he ended up in sports at all is just a, and not dead, but that he's still going.

It's amazing. That's most of his memoir. It's like every chapter he checks in to be like, and I didn't die and I didn't die. Yeah. I'm still alive. This shit I did. Holy fuck. So yeah.

So they, they came on the market with this new broom and basically brooms like in general, because I just looked up Harry Potter. I looked up Quidditch. There's, there's 40 brooms in this universe. Yeah, it's a, well, so it's basically, yeah, there's different models of brooms. Essentially, the more expensive brooms are usually made of like a lighter material, like a carbon fiber, for example. So, you know, Dave, I know you play hockey. It's similar to like a hockey stick, right? It's like the more expensive your hockey stick, generally speaking, the lighter it is.

And it's performance is like slightly better. Yeah. So this is similar. I don't notice the difference. The way I play. But tell me you bought the, you bought the top. Oh yeah. You got it.

I got the, uh, no, I, there's a guy I play with who has like the $500, whatever. I forget. Should he have the $500 stick? I mean, he has like the $500 whatever I forget. Should he have the $500 stick? I mean, he's got the money. Yeah, yeah, fair. The invisible hand of the market to kind of let him do it. It's what Adam Smith talked about back in 17, whatever. Exactly, hockey sticks.

We stand out of Smith. We always have here on the podcast. So this guy's making a broom. Yes, they may be coming out. Yep. They make the broom. It comes out, takes them a little while to get market saturation. So they're, you know, the broom is available, but you know, no pros are using it or anything like that. Then it just like more and more people start to use it. And then in 2014, one of the top three teams in the world decides to start using it. Hardline offers them like a bunch of money. One of the biggest, probably the biggest sponsorship deal ever in curling. They start using the broom and they have basically

the best season anyone's ever had. And so, you know, the top teams, they start to think they're like, what the hell? Like, you know, these guys are good, but this is like the best season we've ever seen what happened. And they started to think they're like, what the hell? Like, you know, these guys are good, but this is like the best season we've ever seen what happened. And they started to notice that the broom was really good. And so then Brad Gujoo, Canadian hero, uh, from St. John's Newfoundland has a highway named after him in Newfoundland, which is my favorite fact about him.

Screw a street. My favorite highway. I think I like to think of it highway first and then him. Of all the Canadians with highways named after them, Tom Cochran isn't one of them. Well, he was he and highways had a falling out, even though that song was about the. I heard highways were actually really pissed off about that. They were like, we're not we're not really life so much. Yeah. Life is more like a fucking box of chocolates, idiot.

You're dumber than Forrest Gump's mom. Hey, look, the Forrest Gump won an Oscar. What life is a highway nowhere near the Grammys. I mean, it speaks for itself. Ah, that's true. Although if there was going to be any song from his catalog that would have gotten a Grammy, who would have been that? I guess it would have been that one. I mean, name another one.

Name another Tom Cochran song challenge. Oh, I can name 15. Yeah, my boy's going to play in the big league. We got victory day. We got a white hot. We got a fricking, oh my God, what was that one he did that was like about the hail Bob Comet. Yes.

Heaven's gate. Was it just called Heaven's Gate? No, it was like, it was from two albums after Mad Mad World, which is the one that Life is the Highway was on. Isn't Life is the Highway on Ragged Ass Road? No, Ragged Ass Road came out after Life is the Highway. Mad Mad World, the title track, of course, as well I could name.

I sing it like a sunset. You know a lot about Tom Cochran, this is crazy. He was in, what was the band he was in? Red Rider. Red Rider. And they had- The Heartbreakers, I think. No. And they had Lunatic Fringe. Yeah, Lunatic Fringe, that's the one I was thinking of.

Oh, is it Lunatic? Yeah, Lunatic Fringe, yeah. Oh God, I gotta find this song that came out after sort of like a kind of like a bit of scatting about the hellbop. Oh, now, John, you live in Calgary, which is home to Canada's Music Hall of Fame. And if you go there, they have Tom Crocker and's outfit that he wore in the Life is a Highway video. So I got to go see it. You got to. You can go see it in person.

You can get your picture taken next to it. A true Canadian artifact. But when I say you can picture the outfit, surely you can remember the outfit he's wearing. I think so. Yeah, it's like it's kind of like it's like a cowboy shirt, right? Yeah. And he's wearing a leather jacket and he's wearing some jeans. That's so cool, because you just put it in a museum, but it could be any leather jacket or jeans.

Oh, that's not how the Canada Hall of Music Hall of Fame works. Well, I believe I believe it is authentic, but I also believe if you didn't want it to be authentic, it could just not be. Are you trying to expose a scandal at the Canadian Music All of Fame? I'm desperately searching for a new podcast, Graham. I'm so... I need another one. I need another hit.

I'm like, you know, it's like, what have you done for me lately? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember when I was a youth, I went to an outdoor music festival and Tom Cocker was one of the acts on it. And he climbed up the scaffolding during his set and then couldn't get back down. How'd they get him down? They brought a ladder out on stage so he could climb down. That's rough. Did he seem scared? Was he like, oh no, I think he was more frustrated. Like, oh, I didn't think this through. But like around the same times, Eddie Vedder swung from a mic cord from the top of a stage.

So I think people were just trying to one up each other scaffolding wise. Right. They're like, we got to explore the space. They saw the great road warrior scandal of 1998 where a drug addled road Warrior hawk or animal climbed up on top of the Titan Tron and apparently fell from it. There was an absolute Tom Cocker, it's part of the Tom Cochran catalog. Part of his lore as well as he was wearing in the Mad Mad World video, he's climbing up on scaffolding wearing just a leather vest. No pants either.

No. Wow, he's just hanging. He's just hanging brain. So apparently the song I was thinking of is called Willie Dixon said. It's sort of a kind of a rap talking. I don't like this at all. I do not like this at all. I do not like this at all.

This is bad. Well I do. I don't want to listen to it anyway. I feel like there's sort of a maybe kind of a Robbie Roberts sitting there. Turn it up. Oh no. Turn it up. Oh no. My grandma seems to get it. Tyler comes to slick that you can't predict the news.

Water it down like a butter, nothing to lose. All right, all right. Coming up the cheese. Guy, that sounds like a guy trying to capitalize on the success of Tom's diner like six years too late. This was in prime Sean Mullins, rockabye era. Oh, great tune, great tune. But it was-

John the Sproom came on the market. Wait, wait, wait. I just wanna say that I believe in the chorus of this song, which you wouldn't let me get to, he says something like, it's called like Willie Dixon said, gonna hail bop me, gonna hail me a cab. So I believe he mentions the hail bop comet. Nice, nice.

That's tough, That's tough. It's tough stuff, man. Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, the pro uses the broom. Everybody's like, what the hell? Brad Gujoo figures out that if you use the broom with one sweeper, it's basically the most powerful broom

we've ever seen. Now for people unfamiliar with curling, it's the one where you slide a rock down the, what do they call it? The frozen carpet. That's exactly right. That's what we call it. And then you have two people sweeping away to make the rock move one way or the other and knock into the other rocks. Yep, pretty much.

So typically we always thought that brooms could only make the rocks go further and stay straighter. That was like the initial thought and it was always two people sweeping. They stay straight? I kind of thought it was, cause they call it curling. Like does the rock curl,

like it kind of, can it go in sort of a, whatever, a parabola? Yeah, it basically goes in like a parabola, like a banana. But then if you're sweeping, the idea is that you reduce the amount that it curls. It's still gonna curl. You can't stop it from curling.

But it's just reducing the amount. But then that's what Brad figured out, because usually the two sweepers would be counteracting each other, right? Like one would be sweeping one direction, one would be sweeping the other. So even if the broom had a great effect, the outside broom was kind of canceling it out.

So Brad was like, what if we get rid of the outside broom? We only have one sweeper sweeping one way. And then it was like, oh my God, this is the most powerful broom we've ever seen. You could basically, it looked like you could, you were controlling the rock with a joystick. Like you could, you could make the rock back up

like against the curl. You could make it curl like eight feet. You could do whatever you wanted. So as long as the thrower could get it kind of close, you could make basically any shot. And so the other, the other sweeper, they would just have to go like pick up coffees for everyone else. Yeah. Their position changed to gopher.

Uh, and then they had to go out. Yeah. No, you, cause what you would do though, Dave is so yeah, you'd have the one person not sweeping until you wanted the rock to curl. And then this sweeper would go away. And then the other rock, the other person would sweep this way and then it would make the rock curl. So for the listener, when he says this way and this way,

he means one way or the other. Yeah, exactly. Just in case you're- He's using his hands to gesture it. Yeah. I know you can't see that, but I also figure you can figure it out. So yeah, not from Canada. Curling is like a huge deal here in Canada. It's a big, big event that is it every year there's a bond spiel or is that every other

year or Graham there every month my guy there every weekend. Also is curling sponsored by Kleenex here in Canada is tissue and a minute of heart I said you yeah yeah you got it if you said it was sponsored by Kleenex you would be killed Scotty's tournament of hearts is that co-ed is that women's that's women's so it's the national championship for women and then the men's national championship is the briar. And who sponsors that? It was Tim Hortons, but it just changed this year to Montana's.

Oh, wow. The steakhouse. I think I remember it being LeBat at one point. Yes, it was LeBat at one point. Yeah. It was McDonald tobacco before that. Then it was LeBat forever. Then it was Nokia for one year.

And then it's been Tim Hortons for the last like 20. And then just this year it changed to Montana. Do we have a Montana's here? In Vancouver, probably not. It's a very suburban, there's definitely like a Montana's in Coquitlam or something. Sure.

Well, I'm gonna go. Yeah, we got it. I'm gonna make my reservation as soon as we're done. Not to derail it again, but you've curled since your teen years, is that right? Yeah. And you followed it. It's a great TV sport,

because they have that overhead camera that follows the rock. And what was it, did you ever watch it before it had the overhead camera? What was curling like on TV before that? Have I asked you this? I can't remember a time that it didn't have the overhead camera, I guess. Can't imagine it had it in like the seventies.

Yeah, no, I think what they did, I'm trying to think of like the old world championship footage I've seen, and it's like they have it off to the side, like angled. So you can kind of see where the rocks are in the house but not yet it's obviously not as good as the overhead but yeah I think it was like it would almost be like they would have it maybe a small tower in the rink and then you'd have it like an angle and the house you can you get a shirt in the gift shop of the curling rink that says curling get

your rocks off yeah it seems like something they'd have, right? Maybe in a Facebook ad you can get, I don't think you can get at the gift shop at the, at the Scotty's, but, or you should just make it Dave. I mean. Yeah. I did, I did have to go get a, go look at t-shirt supplies at Michael's the other day. So you might as well get one of your own, get curling, get your rocks off. One of my kids in sports day was placed on the yellow team.

Hey, well, I guess we got to go buy a yellow shirt. Did you get anything put on the shirt or it was just like, we need a blank yellow shirt? I could have put something on it, but she told me not to. Okay. I can put your damn name on it in Cooper black font. Now, and people who have never seen curling before in the seventies, it was not unusual to see somebody smoking while playing this.

Absolutely smoking, even, even while throwing, like you, you watch the world championships and the skips just got like a dart hanging out of his mouth while he's throwing the rock. They used to have ashtrays in the ice. They would actually like, uh, like they would, you know, like the, you know, the ashtrays on a pole, you know, like you got the kind of the pole and the ashtrays on the top, they would freeze the bottom of the pole into the ice. So you just like halfway down the sheet, there'd be ashtrays. So when the sweepers were done sweeping the rock, they could ash their butt on the, you know, go back to the smoking. Yeah. Oh, there's nothing I don't love about that. That's great. Bring it back.

Yeah. They haven't really, I feel like there would be a market for just like a smoke and spiel. Like it's just like once a year you can come to the club and smoke while you're playing. This is your grandfather's curling. Yeah. You can advertise. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. People would love that. I think. And then, yeah, like, I'm sure you guys know being Canadians, like every

curling club has a bar in it as well. Yeah. It's very, it's very social sport that way. A lot of drinking, not so much at the top levels anymore, but, uh, but yeah, certainly recreational curling has a very big drinking element to it. Cause now like the curlers, they're, they're in shape. They stay in, they stay in shape. That was kind of like part of this whole broom gate thing

is it kind of led to more professionalism in the sport because you know, this broom comes out, people go, this is the most powerful broom ever. And there was really no mechanism to ban it. There was no rules in the rule book about equipment or anything like that. Oh, there's a quick point. Anything in the rule book that says a dog can't. I was just wondering about that.

Uh, yeah, that was actually, we had three pages about which animals can and cannot curl that would, that was the one thing we got right. Oh man. A dog would slide all over the place and have its legs going out as far as possible. They wouldn't be able to totally dogs. No beavers. Yes. Bears. Yes. You would think dangerous, but no bears pretty good on the ice bears. Yes.

Absolutely. Yeah. Horses. No too big. Can't get them in there. Penguins. Yes. Penguins. Absolutely. Yes. So good at walking on these great sweepers as well. Yeah. But, uh, no rules about the brooms or the, or airbud or whatever he'd be named in Curler. Icebud. Icebud. Yes, thank you. There we go. MVC, most valuable. Curler. Chimpanzee. But yeah, it was a crazy time. And so that was kind of like, I think, broomgate was, the sport was already getting a little more professional. Curlers were getting in better shape, taking the sport more seriously. And I think broom gate was the kind of tipping point of people going, you know

what, like if we want this to be a professional sport, we really got to start treating it like one. And so, uh, that's kind of part of the story that's woven into the, to the podcast. So that broom is the cause the giant fight. Big fight. Yep. And it for like a year cause the giant fight. Big fight, yep. And it- For like a year, it was like a year of in-fighting

and people getting pissed. Do you still curl? I curl recreationally now, yeah. I retired from competitive play for years ago. Oh yeah, here's a joke. Get ready for a joke. Here it comes. Oh, so these guys are getting in better shape. I talk about doing curls.

They were doing curls. Like bicep curls. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I get it. That's good. That's good stuff. Do we wanna hear a little bit more from Tom Cochran? Yeah, okay, let's play a little.

We'll be right back after this track from Tom Cochran. That's how you know the curling talk is not going great. It's like, we've got to make this more exciting by listening to Tom Cochran. Wow, he really says, hail bop way more times than I thought he was going to. Do we think he was on the side of Heaven's Gate? Like was he, was he stoked on their mission? Like what's he going for? He just liked their sneakers.

Yeah. He was just a sneaker head. I don't remember that. I remember that happening and people being like, or I guess Nike, everyone was wearing Nikes. Air Maxes, yeah. Yeah. And Reebok was like, we were considered for it as well,

but Nike won out the day. I guess I remember, I feel like that's something people go back to all the time. I feel like at the time it wasn't such a big deal that they were wearing Nikes. And, but I guess at the time people said, oh, this is gonna hurt Nike's sales. Mm-mm.

No. No, people loved it. People, I mean, people didn't learn the lesson from Adidas and Jonestown. I mean, yeah, yeah, just making that up. I know it's not real, but I'm trying to picture you're talking about this broom that was like such a leaps and bounds, better piece of equipment. What was the first like shoe that wasn't a Converse sneaker that was used in basketball? Like who was the first person to come out with a shoe that actually had like cushioning?

Well, it was like, I saw this ad for like, for Converse and they still Converse was still like they went to leather eventually, but into the 80s, it was like Larry Bird and Magic Johnson wore Converse. Yeah, but like. If only they made like a movie about the Air Jordan. Well, it would help me learn a lot probably, if they could do that. Yeah.

I think it wasn't, didn't PF Flyer, I feel like they were early in the basketball game. Yeah. But then they changed to PF Chang's and they became early in the basketball game. Yeah. But then they changed to P.F. Chang's and they became sort of a Chinese restaurant. Yeah, I'll still go there because all the employees wear those P.F. Flyers still have P.F. Chang's.

They've got a lot of old ones in the back. Yeah, what was the first non-canvas basketball shoe? It's a good question. Yeah, no way to know. I'm sure in some song, Tom Cochran references the first. He does a lot of recon. He does a lot of research on his shoe history. It was apparently the Nike Bruin, Dave.

Came out in 1972. As opposed to canvas, this shoe was constructed with leather and suede. Nice. Nice. You can wear suede. Nice, nice. You can wear suede because it's all indoors. There's no outdoor season of NBA basketball. It's all indoors. Which is, I think, a good idea.

But, you know what? If you've got an arena, they can open and close. They play it on, you know, you can play it outside. They have those outside. Yeah, that's true. Basketball hoops. White man can't jump style. I have those outside. Yeah, that's true. Basketball hoops. White men can't jump style. I don't play, you know why?

Cause of being told that I'm a white man. Oh, sure. I can't jump. I just believe it. Right. I've been told that my whole life. Do you think you have good vert, Graham? Just like over?

Yeah, I know. I would never know because you know, I saw that movie and I was like, uh, fuck man. I don't like, I got no business in this sport at all. Someone sees you playing hopscotch, they're like, stop it. Yeah, no, we don't. You're too loud. Then I'm like, well, okay, I'll just dance over here. No, no, no, no, don't do that either.

Weight man can't dance? No, name me one good weight dancer, Fred Astaire. Ah. Good, I'm glad you said it because I was gonna be like left shark, famously a bad dancer. I heard he was a great white so that's true. That's really good. Check this out. Okay, so you talk to all the people involved. There's some real characters. The guys who created the broom, nutso.

Yeah, there's a couple of brothers from Montreal. You actually traveled and this is a legitimate, like, let's go meet these people at their factory. Yep. Yeah. It was a legitimate, we traveled all over Canada. I went to St. John's to talk to Brad Gujju.

Uh, we went to Winnipeg. We did. Yeah. We were, we were all over the place. We were at all the curling hotspots, uh, the suburbs of Montreal, St. John's and Winnipeg. So the big ones. Yeah, we had all the big ones. It was so cool. Yeah, no, it's a it's a real it was a real podcast. It is a real

podcast. And it charted like it was up there. You were like second only to j rogan. Well, we actually passed him. We were we were number one for we were number one for two days. We are currently number two and we're ahead of J Roges, as I call him. J Rogan is just a faster way to say his name than usual. I loved his work in T-Rex. But Dinosaur Jr., wrong band.

Anyway, that's all right. I tried, tried. But yeah, it was real. We're currently the number one comedy podcast in Canada, I think, at least we were this morning. So is it, is it supposed to be a comedy? Well, they said that, like it is, there is some funny moments, but it's not like explicitly a comedy, but the

thought was that it would be much harder to chart on the sports charts. Cause I get the sports charts are all dominated by your incumbents. You're, you're, you're spitting chiclets. You're, uh, you know, your fantasy football freak out with crazy Fred or whatever the fucking shows are called. Yeah.

The sport ball with the nerds who don't like sports. Yeah, totally. Yeah. It's a big. Yeah. We didn't want to get beat up by Pat McAfee for trying to take his chart place with curling. You know, it sounds like a deep cut to me. get beat up by Pat McAfee for trying to take his chart. Yeah. Curling, you know, it sounds like a deep cut to me. I don't know about McAfee.

Oh, he's a former Indianapolis Colts punter who has like the most popular sports show. It's like an ESPN daily sports show. You didn't want to go up against John Tesh's round ball rock daily. Absolutely. They're bringing it back. There's rumors. They're bringing round ball rock daily. Absolutely. They're bringing it back. There's rumors they're bringing round ball rock back. Rules. I don't know what this is. What is round ball rock?

Are you guys making something up or is this real? Round ball rock was the NBA on NBC theme by John Tesh. Oh by John Tesh. The one that's like Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. That's the one that's like, dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. That's the peanuts theme. Wasn't it the Saturday Night Live was buh buh buh buh basketball.

That's it. You got it. Yeah. They did that. Give me the ball cause I'm gonna dunk it. Yeah. You got it. I got it. I got it. Yeah. You know. Dave, what's going on with you, my friend?

Oh my God. Did we get through enough of John? We learned that he charted an amazing hilarious top comedy podcast funniest podcast in Canada podcasts There's no you also have another podcast it's about jeopardy Apple podcast doesn't go through the charts and be like wait This is it comedy. Yeah, no, they don't give a shit. This isn't funny enough. Whatever. Yeah, you guys should be like on the, what's the weakest chart? Like you guys should be like.

Hey, fuck you. Hey, what the fuck, man? You guys should, hey, how about you should be on the weakest chart? No, I just mean like change your podcast from comedy to a weak chart. We have. And fucking find the thing.

We have. This is the weakest chart we could find. We got our asses kicked all over the classical music chart. Yeah Yeah, the classical music chart they got frickin what's his face is kicking her Oven is just Number one again fucking bullshit Who's the LA? Symphony conductor with the big hair?

Oh, Albert Einstein. Dudamel, Gustavo Dudamel. Oh, if I had pulled it. Do tell with Dudamel. His interview podcast. I'd listen. Tell me more about the LA Philharmonic. Oh, well, uh, it was, uh, we, I think we play in a Frank Gary designed building.

Yeah. We played at the Viper room when we were early on. I saw Johnny Depp and went out to ride her in there one night. It was crazy. River Phoenix. All the stories are true. Yeah. Yeah.

We were doing a Beethoven's fifth that night. And, um, um, yeah, but really tell it quickly about your, uh, your Jeopardy podcast. Yes. I have a new Jeopardy podcast as well with past guest of the show, Emily Heller, very funny comedian, TV writer. Uh, and yeah, we, uh, this may shock you guys. There, uh, is not that many podcasts about Jeopardy.

So that's kind of shocked me to be honest. Those are you, you say you're in a weak category there. Oh, we are in the weakest. Yeah. We're, we're trying to get, we're trying to get up there, but we can't, we're, we're really struggling with the, with the, the pod is right. Uh, which is but we can't. We're really struggling with the pod is right,

which is the price is right. Oh really? What, do you Graham, do you still watch Jeopardy? I no longer have the cable package that I had before, so no Jeopardy for me, unfortunately. There's no online option to get your Jeopardy. You gotta have the cable or nothing. Uh, Graham, we'll talk. Oh, what do you do? You watch it on something like Plex or something like

that? I do have it on Plex, but it is also, generally speaking, someone will post the game on YouTube almost every day. Oh, that's a nice courtesy. You know, if you and the Mrs. are looking to wind down with some Jeopardy, just crank on the old YouTube. We actually wind up with some Jeopardy, and that's how we get things going. Ooh, my. Yeah, starts sprinting around the bed. Our trivia, our trivia night.

I watched it for every day. I watched it every day for years. And then when I, it sort of like was right in bedtime when I, after the kids were born. And then, but right when the kids were born, it was perfect because there was something about the all blue on the screen that made my kids when they were babies, made them like zen out.

It is, it is very, it is zen. Like Jeopardy's got some zen elements to it. But it also has some really crazy competitive elements to it. It's it, they have a new producer, Michael Davies, who is one half of the men in Blazers. Uh, if you know, are familiar with that, the soccer show that got very popular and he's like, Hey, Jeopardy should be like soccer. And now there's like a bunch of tournaments and they're bringing all these people back on the show. There's corner kicks, they never had corner kicks before. Yeah. They've got corner kicks, you can't touch the buzzer with your hands.

Between Jeopardy and Double Jeopardy they have orange slices. Yeah. Graham and I both went for like professional soccer references, like orange slices are pretty key as well. Do you think professionals don't eat orange slices? No, they do gels. Aren't they? Don't they do gels?

It's all gels now. It's all gels now. Yeah. I'm so out of it. Yeah. They go quick video, Sassoon. Little dippity doo for me. Little dippity doo, yeah.

They come out in the second half looking crazy. What do you talk about the whole week's worth of episodes or a particular episode of the week? Yes, we do. We do a weekly recap. So it's like the first half of the show is recapping the games. So we kind of do like a little synopsis of all the games, talk about those. And then the back half of the show is, is more of the like kind of comedy portion of

the pod where I mean, we're, we're having laughs throughout. We pick like our favorite responses of the show is more of the like kind of comedy portion of the pod. Where, I mean, we're, we're having laughs throughout. We pick like our favorite responses of the week. We pick our favorite anecdote of the week. There is actually a thriving like online culture of Jeopardy where people get really mad at the stupidest shit constantly. So Emily has an entire segment where she goes online and finds out what Jeopardy fans are mad about that week. So yeah, it's like, yeah, we, it's just like a fun show. There is no comedy podcast about Jeopardy and we thought why not create, why not create the market?

We're, we're creating our own chart. Yeah. And you know, be the change you want to see in the world. Right? Absolutely. Absolutely. Is there really a prices right podcast? Uh, probably.

You made that one up before. Oh, 100% made it up. Yeah. Did you guys see the Drew Carey fish tweets? I feel like Graham would love the Drew Carey fish tweets. I don't know. Oh dude, you gotta, you gotta check it out. Drew Carey went, he went to a fish show. They played the sphere. They played the sphere. Oh yeah. Yeah. And, uh, and Drew Carey just went on a big rant about how he was going to chop his own dick off and put it in a blender. Cause there's no reason to have a dick if you can go see fish at the sphere.

Oh, he was like, he spun it positively. Oh, it was big time positive. Oh yeah. He was absolutely loving. He loved fish. Usually if I say I'm going to cut my dick off and put it in a blender, I'm mad about something. No, he was, this was, this was very positive.

He's like, I am putting my whole dick in a blender and this is good. I like this. And it is good. And he saw that it was good. Yes. Yeah. I know it's not that kind of show, so I won't get too more into the- Oh no, no please, give me more.

No, I will stop it there. But it was, go check it out. Drew Carey on Twitter. Uh, Dave, what's going on with you, man? Oh boy, not a heck of a lot, but one thing I was talking a few minutes ago about, uh, well, it's hockey's happening. And so that's every other night of my life. I'm watching a hockey game and my heart is in my throat.

Um, we're pre-taping this. So hockey may not be happening when this comes out. But I talked a bit about it last week. So the other thing that's going on with me is I mentioned when my kids were born, we watched a lot of Jeopardy. And right now what I'm doing is I'm sort of revisiting movies

from when my kids were born that like things I watched and I heard that this movie was really good and then I fell asleep because I tried to watch a movie at nine o'clock at night and I passed out. And so now I've kind of I've gone back and started watching movies from that era that I heard were really good and just to give them a second chance. And then I've just added to my list movies that I watched once before and didn't fully appreciate and then I'm just rewatching them. And so here's what I've watched lately. Okay. These are these are movies that were new back then, or these were movies that were just in general

you were watching? Well, these were movies that were new back then. Well, I'll tell you. So I watched- Bill Murray's Garfield. Bill Murray's Garfield, yeah. We just, because we want to get ready for the new, for- Gotta get ready. Chris Pratt Garfield.

Yeah, Chris Pratt Garfield. So I watched a movie. I fell asleep during originally the good guys, oh yeah, the good guys is funny with the Russell Crowe and Ryan's other guys. There we go. No, the other guys is nice guys the nice guys. What the hell? It's the not called the good guys. Yeah, it is. It's the nice guys. That's right. The nice guys I think well Graham you went along with it for a while Well, as soon as he said good guys, I was like, yeah, that's probably the title of it

But nice guys sounds more accurate. So yeah, okay the other guys is the Mark Wahlberg will ferrell one Yeah, other cops. Yeah, and good guys is I think like an electronics store in America Checks out so And Good Guys is, I think, like an electronic store in America. It checks out. So yeah, I rewatch that. Good. Yeah, it was good. My favorite scene is quite early on in the movie where he breaks a window to try and open the door on the other side and he just cuts himself and starts bleeding out. Yeah, I do like those movie moments where someone tries a movie thing and

it doesn't work. You see what would really happen? Like driving through a metal gate or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I also watched Pop Star Never Stop Never Stopping. Oh, yeah. Hilarious. Did I get that title right? Yep, I think you did, yep.

Yep. Yeah, that was fun. Yeah, that's a goodie. I watched Gone Girl. Love Gone Girl. Truth be told, I think this was maybe the first one I rewatched Because I was like everyone loves Gone Girl. Everyone loves David Fincher. Oh, it's so good

Yeah, and it's one of those movies if it's on or if I find it on a streaming service I'll watch it just at the drop of a hat. Love that movie. Mm-hmm So good. She's so good at it. Oh my God. Rosamund Pike, yikes, yikes. Rosie Pike's. Rosie Pike's. Yikes, Pike's. And then, so those are the three from that era that I watched, that I rewatched.

And then following that I was like, well, I told you a few weeks ago, I rewatched Heat. Oh yes, yeah. Because I didn't like it the first time and everyone told me I was wrong. And? It's okay. It's pretty good.

Yeah. It's quite long, right? Yeah. It's a longie, it's a longie. And it's got your Pacino De Niro and everyone was like, the two goats going at it. The guys, it's the two guys.

Yeah. Going at it. Acting guys, it's the two guys. Yeah. Yeah. Ha ha, going at it. Ha ha ha, acting their balls off. Yeah. Their dicks are cut off and in a blender. But they're acting so good. Oh, I'm gonna eat that thing anymore. Yeah, if I can watch heat all day, it's three hours long,

so I can watch it six times in a day. Wait, am I awake 24 hours? I can watch it six times in a day. Wait, every time I wake 24 hours, I can watch it eight times in a day. If you believe in yourself, you can. Yeah, I mean, what's the longest film that's continuously watched, Heat? There's a podcast about it. It's about a guy who set the record.

He's insane now. The podcast is called I'm in Heat. I'm pretty good. I watched, this is one that I rewatched because I fell asleep the first time. And I was like, I should love this movie. Why didn't I love this movie? I watched Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy.

Oh, that seems like something that's right up your alley. I gotta tell you, I loved this movie. Yeah, there we go. And I was looking at the day, the date it came out. It came out three years before I had kids, so I don't know what my excuse was. But this, this fulfills one of your criteria of what makes a Dave Schumpka classic

is a lot of people talking. A lot of quiet talking, a lot of politeness. Yeah. Oh, it's so good. I've never seen it. I don't know. No, I don't. It's got Gary Oldman.

I do know that it's got about all I know about it. It's a John Le Carre novel. Yeah, it's based on it's based on this John Le Carre novel. And it's a series of eight novels. And I think it's like the fifth of them. Oh, okay. So it's part of the spy who came in from the cold series. Okay.

And that's the third one, I think. Oh, okay. And it's, is it long? Is it a long film or is it just kind of standard? I think it's normal by today's standards, maybe two hours in a bit. So good. And then the other one I watched, I was like,

oh, I should love this movie. Why don't I love this movie? Michael Clayton. Oh. That seems like it would fall in the same category. Oh man, I loved Michael Clayton. Everybody says they love that one. I haven't seen that one either.

I'm not a good movie guy to talk with. I don't see any movies, but. I only will watch ones that Seinfeld have been involved in. So you can imagine this year has been a big one for me. Unfrosted. How many times have you seen it? No, I have one life to live here. I can't spend time on shit like that.

Did you watch B movie? Yes. When it came out. Okay. Yeah. But even I was reticent. Even when that came out, I was like, I really do like Jerry Seinfeld. That was the beginning of the end of my affinity for Mr. Seinfeld.

Yeah. Do you like him? I still love Seinfeld, the show. Sure. I can't get enough of it. Yeah. But do you like, at the time, did you think he was a great stand-up comedian? He was the only comedian that I had any. Yeah, I had a just for laughs

Like compilation cassette and then Seinfeld those were like the two Access points for standup and then like I remember like George Carlin He would have like specials HBO specials that you could get at the video store So I remember because he was in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. So that's that was my connection to him. But I watched old evening of the improv videos and Seinfeld is on a couple of episodes. He's fine. He's not like he's not funnier than anybody else

that was around at that time. The magic ingredient was Larry David. Yeah. And I feel like because he had such a, when I was starting Stand Up, that movie, Comedian had come out earlier, the documentary, and it was like, well, he's the biggest there is. Yeah.

And he is such a student of it. There must be something to the, this must be the way to do it. And then Ornie Adam was the other comedian in that. And he was also such a student of it. And like, didn't he have like file cabinets of jokes and. We all do. Every comedian has a file cabinet of jokes. Yep, mine's right behind that door.

But it really like painted it as like, well, if you want to be a standup comedian, We all do. Every comedian has a file cabinet of jokes. Yep. Mine's right behind that door. But it really like painted it as like, well, if you want to be a standup comedian, you gotta be, you gotta study it. You gotta like know, you have to understand why something's funny. It's not good enough to just make people laugh. Right.

And Seinfeld felt like he would be the type of guy who you'd like meet him and he'd be like, you don't have a file cabinet of your jokes? Yeah. Guess that's it for you, buddy. Yeah, no chance you're gonna go anywhere. Get those jokes in a filing cabinet, bud. I remember that he said a thing and I was like, that's an absolute, you have no idea what you're talking about. It was one thing where I was like, he does not, this is not true. Where he said, even if you're the most famous comedian in the world, the audience will give you a few minutes, you know,

for free and then you've got to be funny. And I'm like, absolutely, that's not true. They'll give you an hour and a half of their time. You can be absolute dog shit. They've paid tickets to see you. They're like, if you show up at a show and they weren't expecting you, you've ruined the entire show. You've ruined expecting you, that you've ruined the entire show.

You've ruined the entire show, they love you the entire time. They love you the entire time, but they're not laughing. Their minds are just like thinking about who they're gonna tell. Like Jay Seinfeld showed up at this gig last night. I think that's true if you are famous and not a comedian. Like I have seen famous people

who are trying to do stand up and they're not good at it. And then they get like five or 10 minutes. But if you're famous for being a comedian, you're fine. You've got the whole like, and you hear all the stories of like Chris Rock bombing on purpose for like 30 minutes to deliberately like make the crowd not like him so that he can test out material and that kind of like, you know. I've been trying that same technique and the audiences haven't been responding to the second half of the program.

They really liked that first half where I suck. You're like, I heard Chris Rock on a podcast talking about this. Why isn't it working for me? He's a scientist of comedy? He knows he's studied it all. I put this joke in a filing cabinet and everything. The one uh, what was the

I think it was Louis CK that said like his thing was that he would put his best joke first and then he would try to follow that joke with his newer stuff. And I've done that before too and man oh man does that not work at all you do your first joke and everybody's like this is gonna be great and then whoo in the toilet it goes I remember him saying that and I

was like you're lying I think you're lying I think you're lying or you don't know what your best joke it's one or the other I just remember everyone all the other comedians when I was starting all the other comedians when I was starting, all the older comedians had advice. Yes. And it was like, yeah, no, that your first bit, your strongest bit, you'll find that eventually that might become your last bit. What does that mean?

Yes. I don't know, there's all sorts of advice out there. It's, I wish that more people did podcasts where people talk seriously about standup. That would be, I feel like that's a niche that hasn't been filled yet. I was trying to joke around like, Oh, okay. I get it. You're a couple of comedians. You're joking around. How about we get serious about this? Yeah. How about we talk about how comedians are the last word, the truth tellers,

the modern day philosophers. I'm trying to find this, uh, the last, we're the truth tellers, the modern day philosophers. I'm trying to find this, the worst, like when he, on Seinfeld, when they would go to him in the comedy club telling jokes. Yeah. Like I just assumed that was funny. But I watched it. And then I rewatched some of it and there was,

oh God, I can't find it. But the worst, there was a terrible bit he does about like going on three dates with a woman and she won't put out and then she gets arrested for hers. Like I think they should be able to arrest women for not going all the way. The modern day truth tellers, right? Yeah, exactly.

Just saying it like it is. Anyway, so what's going on with you, Graham? Oh, it's all happening over here at Clark Enterprises. If you can find, there's one Jerry Seinfeld opening monologue joke or maybe a closing joke where he uses a prop. He wears a funny hat in it and I remember seeing it and like blowing my mind and getting a screen grab of it. He wears like a like a hunter's hat and as like huh I never thought he'd be this guy who's the scholar of comedy doing a

little bit of prop work. I also remember one bit where he was like talking about food and like you know fancy restaurants and he, I'm not like a big foodie. And I was like, in the nineties, people were using the term foodie. Yeah, maybe he invented the word foodie. We have him to thank for the foodie culture. So here's what happened to me. I was out of town, was in Winnipeg, Manitoba, and I was at a show and I had my stuff in a backpack.

And it's a new backpack to me. So I wasn't used to that. There was a zipper on the side instead of zipper on top. So I put my computer in the side. I like put my bag over my shoulder. The computer went flying out of the bag, crashed into the floor, took it back to the hotel room. Screen was all fucked up.

I was like, oh shit, This is this is bad, but then Is this computer not old? Oh, no This is this is like my go-to my nice computer And the screen was all fucked up, but at that point I was like I'll just have a fucked up screen for the rest of the time. I have this computer That'll just be the way that I live with it. Yeah, yeah, I like everyone's phone. Yeah, exactly, I just thought of it as like a phone. You just won't be able to read stuff

that's on the bottom left of the screen. But I was like, okay, I gotta take this in, and take it to the Genius Bar, see what they can do. And here in Vancouver, one of the malls, there's a list of approved genius bar places. First of all, I didn't know that that existed. I thought you just go into the Apple Store. That's where the genius bar is.

No, no, my friend, you can go to London drugs. There's a bunch of London drugs that you go to and they've got a genius bar that can hook you up. And for those people who don't know what a genius bar is, it's the place where you take your broken computer and I think people know this is. It's any pub where I'm hanging out. Okay. Yeah, that's right.

Nice. Well done. Thank you. Um, only somebody who hangs out at the genius bar would be able to. Yeah, that won't, that joke will not be for everybody who listens to this show. Um, but yeah. Uh, so I took it in. There's a brand new Apple store in the Pacific center mall. Oh yeah.

Two stories, two stories. And it is, man, that is a wild, that is a wild situation. I've never been in a store that looks anything like it. It's like walking into a museum. It's crazy. You've got stone walls and which I asked the guy, I was like, I assume these are facades. He's like, no, it's like half inch marble walls that were brought here from

Italy, and they put them like the whole place has got stone walls. It looks like you're in a tomb and a thing. It's got a huge view of all the the surrounding area and that they're doing lectures this is the thing I thought it was like right out of a movie is there just somebody doing lectures I don't know some people I guess they're sitting and watching it we had to walk around them you couldn't walk through you had to walk around because they were in the middle of a lecture you see it's like when you go to Science World and you just want to, you know.

Put your hand on that thing that raises your hair. Yeah, exactly. But there's someone doing a big science demonstration in the middle. The last time I went to an Apple store, they were doing, it was like a person who worked there, a genius, if you will, was giving, it wasn't really a lecture, it was like a presentation on basically

like how to use an iPad. Oh, I think that maybe was this one. There were just people sitting there like, oh, like holding the iPad, like they've never seen it before and being like, oh, this is how I turn it on. And I'm like, I would rather die than be in the middle. Cause there's like 500 people in the Apple store

and you're like, I don't know what an iPad is, fuck. It was just, it blew my mind. I was like, I would rather, I would not do that. I would never do that. Yeah. Yeah. I couldn't handle it. It's so cringe.

But there's like this, uh, I brought it on my computer. You have to make a time. You have to book a time. You can't just waltz in there and talk to one of the geniuses. You got to book time. Then they make you sit at a table with all the other idiots who broke their phones and computers. Well, it's because they're geniuses and you're all idiots. We're the idiots.

Well, they make us wear those dunce caps the whole time that we're there. Put on your cone, they say. And then you just feel like an idiot because everybody's like, what did happen? I dropped it, I dropped it. I dropped I dropped in the toilet Oh, yeah wet. I used it in the rain. Whatever and then The

The genius comes around looks at whatever it is and they he's like well, so just make sure you Back up the thing. I'm like the screen broken. I can't back up anything. I can't do it intuitively And then it was he like can you back up anything. I can't do it intuitively. And then was he like, can you back that up? Yeah. And I was like, that is great. And you look good. Well, you back that up. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I was like, well, if it's complimentary, sure. He's a fine motherfucker. Yeah. Your computer isn't working, but is it working? Yeah. So, yeah, they tell you what the damage is and what they can do. And the guy says, take it home and back it up. I was like, again, I don't this is impossible what you're asking me to do.

I'm supposed to back it up by feel. Can the screen is like the half of the thing that you need to make this whole thing work. So then a guy that I talked to that was kind of the general guy on the floor said, well, you can plug it into your TV and then save it that way. And I was like, I don't know how to do that. And he's like, just get this cord and then do it and then bring it back.

And I don't like anything like that. I mean, people do it. I don't like being in some sort of skin. Yeah, exactly. I don't want to be part of some skin but I already got a screen attached to this. Yeah, exactly. Okay. There's screen to this screen.

Come on. But have you ever had that before where an employee gives you kind of the secret shape? Like, you know, like, uh, Hey, you know what? Don't buy the thing from me. Go across the street and buy it over there. Give you that kind of insider device. I like that. I like that when you get there was a guy that

CAA guy who jump started my car because the battery died. And he's like, you know what? I could sell you a battery right now, but go to Canadian Tire and buy it for a little bit. Costco you buy it for half of what I'd sell it to. And so, you know, I like that. I like having the insight.

Have you guys ever had that before? I like it when you go to the pharmacy and they're like, Hey, this drug you're on. It's a generic now. Yeah. Yeah. Don't buy the brand name anymore. Yeah. Don't buy Viagra anymore.

I'm married to the brand name, baby. Give me, give it to me. Give it to me straight. I, the, the, the problem for me is The problem for me is, we talked a little bit earlier about me moving to Calgary. We bought a house here and I am not, I have no, there's no handy man ability in these hands. I got very soft hands. Oh, me too soft as in the land. Yeah. And so I think it's worse when you you know, you'll have a contractor or someone come over and they look at a thing and they'll go kind of like that.

Like I could fix it for this, but you could just do it yourself. If you get this thing, this thing, this thing, I'm like, buddy, I am not doing it myself. Okay. And then, and then you feel like a dick because they're trying to help you. And I'm like, I can't. And they kind of don't want to do this dumb bullshit job.

Exactly. They're like, this is a dumb, easy job you could do for a third of what I'm like, I can't. And they kind of don't want to do this dumb bullshit. Yes, exactly. They're like, this is a dumb, easy job you could do for a third of what I'm charging you and I'm like, buddy, strap in. You're about to do the dumb, easy job. Yeah. Triple the price for me because I am not fucking doing this myself. Yeah. Anything with electricity.

I won't, uh, I won't try and take on myself because that's yeah. Graham's Amish. Yeah, exactly. I'll take on shaker furniture. I'll make a quilt. No problem Oh, you know what you want to do is you want to buy a cheaper blanket down the hill and then just go right onto that Yeah, just sew two blankets together. I Yeah, I recently bought a power drill. Yeah, I guess as opposed to egg beater bought a power drill. Yeah, I guess as opposed to egg beater. But like, I needed to because I don't know where like you see construction guys on TV or whatever. I know Lord knows

I'm not going to construction site. And there was a no home improvement shows are don't know, home improvement shows are... Yeah, whistling at ladies who walk by. Let's have a show for this. There's one home improvement show I love. The three kids were so crazy. One of them was the cutest. But they had, you know, all the like, house flipping shows. Sure, yes, yes. And I don't know what the difference is between... Because I have screwdrivers.

Yeah. But then there's a drill and then there's all, what also looks like a drill and is a electric screwdriver. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know the difference. You can get a drill. You can put screwdriver parts in it.

Yeah. Put drill parts in it. That's basically what I, that's what I did. What were you doing? What were you drilling? What were you, what handy stuff were you doing? Hanging up some hooks to put some hanging planters. Oh, OK. So a little bit of construction, a little bit of gardening, a little bit of landscaping as well.

HGTV, baby. Home and garden. Successful. Oh, no, they are. The flowers are pouring down the side of the house now. Oh no, the flowers are pouring down the side of the house now. I should have got the guy to just come over and do it for a couple bucks. Well, the place that I hung the hooks, it was so precarious that I was like, I couldn't, I was on, like one toe was still on a ladder while I was like hanging off a post. And I was like, I don't want to be hand screwing into the wall.

I want this to be a 10 second operation. Yeah. And it worked? Yeah. Nice. Yeah, man. Corded drill? Battery?

No, battery. I don't think they'll sell you a corded drill anymore. Really? Well, I know a guy that, you know. I have a corded drill and I think I had to move on from it. That's why. Yeah, cause you would have to get an extension cable. You gotta get the extension cord.

You make the corded drill, but then the cord is only three feet long. I go to the Apple store. I say, Hey, can I get, I think I need an extension cord, buddy. Go across the street. Yeah. Suck this guy's dick.

He'll point in the direction of the truth. He's a wizard. I went to the, so this laptop I have, I bought it maybe six months ago. Every time I buy a laptop, it's $200 more than the one I bought five years earlier, maybe $400 more. And it works just as well. Yeah. It's just newer, works just as well. Yeah. Like it's just newer, just not as full.

But so this one was like in above over 2000 and I bought it online, went to the store and I was like, I just showed them like a QR code on my phone and they said, okay, we'll go get it. I was like, do you need to see my ID or anything? No. No. So anyone with this QR code could just steal my computer?

Yeah. I don't know. I felt like it needed a little bit. This thing was expensive enough that I should be showing ID. Yeah. If you're in there're if stealing is your thing, the Apple Store is a number one the place to do it because they don't print out receipts and you can just walk out like I bought a dongle and I could have just walked out. Nobody questioned that I had bought it. I had to flag somebody down to buy it. So yeah. Oh, well there was a thing before. I don't know if they still do it, but if you had the, uh, Apple store app on your phone,

you could buy it by like scanning the barcode on your camera and then just walk out. That's what I did with the last thing I bought from an Apple store. But like they must, it was wild. That'd be a big problem for them. I guess they don't care. There's like geniuses. They've got to figure it out. They'd be a big problem for them, or I guess they don't care. There's like- Geniuses, they've got it figured out.

They do have it figured out. You go to a drug store, all the razors and cheese are locked down, and the apple's just letting you wander in and wander out with whatever you want. I can't afford baby formula, but I could give my baby this iPhone charger. This USB-C to lightning cable.

Kids love it. Kids love that. Yeah, they love that shit. Yeah, so anyways, my computer was still waiting for it to come back and I miss it. I miss it terribly. They said, did you back it up? I was like, absolutely not. I did not.

And they're like, you know that it could disappear. I was like, yeah, dude, like I get it. I get what a backup means. I didn't do one. The screen is broken. So you know what? It's gonna come back. None of it's gonna work.

Like, don't worry. I've got all my jokes in a filing cabinet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I keep them all in a filing cabinet. So you're without a laptop right now? No, I have this one that I'm recording on and I've just been using that. But this is the new one that I got.

This one's very much on life support. Like it has to be plugged in the whole time yeah and it's got to have like a hard drive attached to it and a mouse attached to it so it's uh it looks like it's like a dying patient. When do you think you'll find out? They said four or five days, been five days already also Wow So first time I've been in a mall for here in Vancouver quite some time. It's just like you left it It's still they still orange Julius. There's New York fries Dave New York fries there Oh, yeah, do you know what their theme song how their theme song goes? I don't know if I've heard it for sure, but I definitely haven't heard I assume it's something about fries

It's probably kind of jazzy Fries that goes like this Give your taste buds something to sing about it. New York fries. Hail, hail, pop, pop, pop, pop. So cool. They got simple plan to record that. Yeah.

Well, it's a, they play it at the beginning of every tour and if they don't, that's the encore song. You got to start with your strongest bit. Try to follow it. You guys heard of this little place called New York Fry's? Woo! I want a hot dog! It's sort of like, because it's not a simple plan or some 41 or whatever, it's just become

a standard. It's one of the old punk standards. But yeah, the mall's still kicking it real and you know, it's the way where teens are still hanging out at the mall and... We talked the last time about Body Shop going out of business. That's one of the great smells going out of... That's one of the great smells, yeah. White Musk, where shall you go?

That was that... I only remember that Body Shop, a friend of mine really liked their vanilla scented thing. Right. That was my mom's growing up because my mom didn't like anything. Like buying gifts for her was impossible. Oh, okay. So the only thing that was. She liked you though, right?

I think so. It's available. Yeah, I mean, I've turned into a successful podcaster. Yeah, that's true. You tell me. She was probably too supportive, if anything. Right. But yeah, that was her. That was like the go to like, you tell me. She was probably too supportive, if anything. Right, yeah. But yeah, that was her, that was like the go-to,

like, you know, another Christmas, mom doesn't want anything again, let's just get her the white musk bath set or whatever. So yeah, that's the only scent I remember. Do you, yeah, Mother's Day just happened, did we all spoil our moms? Spoil their rotten. I gave her that slip and

slight she's been talking about all, all year. It's just the time for summer. Crocodile mile. Yeah. Crocodile mile. That's the one that she wanted. My mom's been getting into NFTs. So I got her a board ape. Oh, that's so cool. So just so affordable. Now, did you get her any of the slurp juice to go along with it? Got her some slurp juice, yeah. Yeah. Hell yeah, dude. I remember when my friend was like, I thought it was the funniest thing forever. Well, Mother's Day is coming up, gonna get her a Bum Fights DVD. Ha ha ha.

But truly what I got my mother for Mother's Day, giant bag of chocolate covered sunflower seeds. Ooh. Oh, I didn't even know that was a thing. She loves them, but they're kind of hard to find. They're candy coated and chocolate covered. And- They've developed them in the army.

That's- Yeah, exactly. And then I got a like five pound bag of them. Nice. Wow. You got to suck the chocolate and the candy off and then bite the shell, spit it out. Yes, yes, there's a shell underneath.

Yeah, they're shelled sunflower seeds, I assume. What did you, John, what do you get your, your mom for money? So my mom is, is in that zone of, again, like I said, doesn't like anything. So all she wants now are Amazon gift cards. That's it. Just give her some Amazon money. And like she told me when I sent her the gift card,

she already had items waiting in her cart that she wanted. So she just used the gift card to buy the items that I guess. Yeah, exactly. Some Chinese company has knocked off white musk and my mom now has a bunch of white musk lotion in the house. Yeah. Well, do you guys want to move on to some over herds? Sure. Yeah.

The greatest generation has been going for more than eight years. And if you've been greatest gen curious but have never taken the leap, we recommend exploring your greatest gen curiosity in a safe, fun environment with partners you can trust. And right now is one of the best times ever to become a new listener. That's because we just started covering a new series, Star Trek Enterprise, one of the horniest and weirdest editions of Star Trek ever released. This is your chance to ease into the greatest generation lifestyle.

The greatest generation, now covering Star Trek Enterprise, the one with Scott Bakula, every Monday on MaximumFun.org or in your podcast app. Hey, Sydney, you're a physician and the co-host of Sawbones, a marital tour of misguided medicine, right? That's true, Justin. Is it true that our medical history podcast is just as good as a visit to your primary care physician? No, Justin, that is absolutely not true. However, our podcast is funny and interesting and a great way to learn about the medical misdeeds of the past, as well

as some current not so legit health care fads. So you're saying that by listening to our podcast, people will feel better. Sure. And isn't that the same reason that you go to the doctor? Well, you could say that, but. And our podcast is free? Yes, it is free. You heard it here first folks,

Sawbones, Merrell-Ture, Miss Guy, The Medicine, right here on Maximum Fun, just as good as going to the doctor. No, no, no, still not just as good as going to the doctor, but pretty good. It's up there. Overheard. Overheard. You hear it? We want to hear it too. Don't be so greedy and keep it to yourself. Bring it here. Give us a slice. And we always like to start with the guest.

John, do you have an overheard? I do. As soon as this happened to me, I was like, if I'm ever on spy again, the, I, this is going to be the one. It was great. It's very, I feel like I've been very Canadian on the show today. This is a very Canadian overheard. I was in a, uh, I was in a sports store, a source for sports, uh, getting my, getting my skate sharpened.

And, uh, there were these two kids behind me, I would guess they were probably like 13 maybe. Um, and they obviously played on two different hockey teams, so they were kind of comparing notes about the year. And so the one kid says to the other kid, you know, Oh, I hear your team's, uh, your team's really good this year.

And the other kid says, yeah, yeah,, yeah, the team's been, yeah, we've had a really good year. We're doing pretty good. We're excited for the playoffs or whatever.'" And then the other kid goes, "'Yeah, I heard you have a really sick goalie.'" And the guy goes, "'Yeah, yeah, our goalie's really good.

Yeah, he's been great.'" And then the kid says, "'Yeah, I heard he's like from the Ukraine or something.'" And the kid goes, "'Yeah, he's from the Ukraine. Doesn't speak a word of English. He's a from the Ukraine or something and the kid goes. Yeah, he's from the Ukraine doesn't speak a word of English She's a fucking beauty Fucking beauty. Hey, yeah doesn't speak a word of English. She's a fucking beauty. That is great. That is great

I mean you want your goalie to be a weirdo Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, and if and if they're like a weirdo in a language, you don't even comprehend. It's even better Yeah, beauty, but the Canucks goalie during this run there Main two goalies got injured and so this their third string goalie is young Latvian guy has been playing for them and has been playing great and The most famous shot of him is him in the dressing room with an ice pack on top of his head.

Like it's a big bag of ice, just not even holding it, just balancing it there. Yeah. Great, great photo. And he looks like my block party co-host, Stefan. He does, Pascal Stefan Heck. Yeah, so every shot of him, I'm just like, oh my God, this is wild.

How often do you get your skate sharp in there, John? Oh, well, Dave, I have yet to find a hockey team here in Calgary. So sadly- Oh, they're called the Flanks. There's one team that's called the Flanks. They're really good at that. There's also the Wranglers, I think. Yeah, there's also the Hitmen.

There's also the Hitmen, they're there. Do they all play in the Saddle Dome? They all play in the Saddle Dome. Wow. Yeah. So the Wranglers and the Hitmen, they don't hitmen, they're there, yeah. Do they all play in the saddle dome? They all play in the saddle dome, yep. So the Wranglers and the Hitmen, they don't open the upper bowl. Oh, okay. And then the flames, obviously, they do.

The full bowl, they show the full bowl. They go full bowl. I've heard that because the dome, it's shaped like a saddle. Yeah, correct. So if you're in the upper dome, are there places you can't see from? Yes, yes.

So because of the saddle dome shape, they couldn't put the press box at the back of the, you know, usually it's either at the back or above the seats, but there was nowhere to put it above because the roof slopes. So the press box actually hangs over a section of the seats. Yeah. So if you're sitting in this and it's like 20 rows, like the top 20 rows of the upper bowl, you can only see half of the rink, but it's not like the kind of like width wise half, it's a length wise half of the rink.

Oh, weird. Yeah, cause you lose your vantage point. So they have TVs mounted on the back of the press box. So it's like, you can see half the game and then when it's on the half, you can't see you watch the TV. And also if famously a lot of big music acts can't play there because if they hang their elaborate lighting gear, it will snap the saddle in half and kill everybody inside.

Okay, well fine. We're getting a new stadium. So we can't wait for that. the saddle in half and kill everybody inside. Okay, well, fine. We're getting a new stadium, so we can't wait for that. So they say. We'll see. It's probably one of the oldest rinks in the league at this point. Yeah, it was built for the 88 Olympics, I think in 86 or 87 it opened maybe, so yeah. Yeah, ancient man. Gotta be up there. Speaking of skate sharpening. Here we go.

I haven't. I've been playing all year. I had my skate sharpened once. I did once in September, once in January. That's it? Yeah. Cause I got my blade, one of my blades broke last year and they replaced it with this black steel.

And they're like, oh, the good thing about this is you don't have to get your skate sharpened as much. And I haven't. Oh, interesting. I really feel like they've held up. They've held up. Because I usually, if I'm playing, I'm every three games, usually I get them sharpened.

Holy cow, you like to get them sharp. It's the only way you can kill guys with them. Yeah, he's a killer. Dave, do you have an overheard? I haven't overseen. Now this is probably to people in the know, this is a little bit like, yeah, so what? There's nothing interesting about this, Dave.

You're just repeating a thing that we've all seen before. But I was in the grocery store today and I walked past a product and I kind of thought it was just like a, maybe a different language translating into a product I've seen before, but like this is the like authentic Italian pronunciation or something. But I was wrong. It is a product called ChiaVR. It's plant-based caviar and I saw it and I was like oh is it like chia VR like the H silent like some other

language and I was like wait I I double-taked it is it made of chia seeds? Made with organic chia seeds. Okay. I get in on that. Yeah, I mean, if you need to have caviar, and we do, we all are, we're so used to caviar, but there's no sustainable way to do it. And there's no plant-based alternative for it. Yeah, like what are we supposed to do at Vegan con or at a fish concert, I assume. Yeah. Or if I'm on some vegan, I guess like where would they caviar on a yacht? On a yacht.

Yeah. On a yacht. At a fancy hall, a mansion. I think it's probably like hot and cold running caviar on a mansion. Yeah. So it's with chia seeds. Chia seeds are pretty like, you soak them for a while. They get all gummy and stuff. Yeah. So it's with chia seeds. Chia seeds are pretty like, uh, you soak them for a while. They get all gummy and stuff.

Yeah. Yeah. I just can't imagine the vegetarian or the vegan. It was like, you know, the one thing I miss, I just can't chicken. Don't care. Cheese, ice cream, whatever. I don't, doesn't matter. But caviar.

How do you eat caviar on this, on the package? They're suggesting that you have it on some kind of a piece of bread with what looks like cream cheese underneath it. So yeah, I feel like you do. It's like a, like either like a cracker or like a crostini. Is that, is it something people eat off like the back of their hand? Yeah, yeah, they do a little, uh, and then if the cops want to find out if it's real, they smear it on the top of their teeth, their gums. Oh no, this is just Chia. Oh yeah, this is the good stuff. This is beluga.

This is the top, top tier. I'm, you know, our listeners are probably like, yeah, David's Chia VR. We've all been eating it. It's also Chia VR. It would be a good like virtual reality Gia. Oh yes. Yeah. You can put anybody's head under a Gia, you know, make their hair grow.

Sometimes it doesn't. I feel like I was too hard on Jerry Seinfeld's comedy if I'm making Gia VR jokes. He would have if they had VR back in the day. Oh, Jerry Seinfeld's take on VR. What is it? I want to hear it. My overheard is I was participating in it. I was trying to be helpful.

You know, you see somebody that's really standing out as a tourist and you're like, they're not going to figure this out on their own. They're like they were dressed such as tourists. Like if you drew a cartoon of a tourist, it would look exact, like with the camera, like literally a camera hanging around the neck. Goofy, like overly sized sun hat kind of wearing couple. I was going to ask about the hat. Yeah, they were glad they had the hat.

They had the hat. The guy had knee high socks. Love it. Yeah, they were great. They were very cute. And I could tell that they were having trouble navigating the compass card machine where you pay to get your like ticket. And they were. This is for bus or sky train, yeah. And they were like asking how it works. And I was like, oh yeah, you know, you just probably buy one for the day if you're gonna be riding around on the train in different places. And they were like, and I just buy it right from the machine?

And I was like, yeah, no, absolutely. Just buy it from the machine. And then they're like, somebody told us we should take the bus to Stanley Park. I was like, yeah, absolutely. That's the way to go. And they were like, what was the bus? And I was like, yeah, absolutely. That's the way to go. And they were like, what was the bus? And I was like, uh, I'm sure it'll say Stanley Park on it.

That was the advice I gave to the out of towner. Just wait for the bus that says Stanley Park. I'm sure there is one. I'm sure there is one. That's the number 19. Yeah. Just get on the one that says Stanley Park and you'll be fine. But I really presented myself as a pro and then buckled pretty quick.

Yeah, where were these people from? Somewhere in the British Isles. They had kind of a fun, not English, but maybe a Welsh accent, something like that. Oh, sure. Maybe they were, you know, mancs. Yeah, they were mancs. They were big Tom Jones fans. Welsh accents? Oh, sure. Maybe they were, you know, mancs. Yeah, they were mancs. They were big Tom Jones fans.

And that concludes my things I know about Wales. All right. I don't think that I don't think if they're mancs, I don't think they're Welsh. Yeah, probably not. What do you know about Wales? The John capital, Cardiff, Cardiff. Yeah. Yeah. I believe I, yeah, in the car. Yeah, I believe I think Ryan Reynolds is the president.

Yes, that team is my understanding. Yeah, Rexam is in Wales. Yeah. Swansea, also a big city in Wales. They have a rivalry with Cardiff. Oh, yeah. You don't want to get in the middle of that. I think I told the story about when I went to Swansea and a little kid farted on me.

Welcome to Swansea. I was, it was too early to get into my hostel. So I chilled out of the beach and a little like seven year old and a speedo came up to bully me and farted in my face. I love that. That's great. That is the other thing I knew about Wales is that I know they've got a crazy language. The longest place name in the world is there.

The flag is like green and white with a red dragon. And that kid probably still brags to this day that he was at the beach and he was seven and I farted into tourists' faces. I bet he did it every day of his life. It was rough and tumble. Scary kid, scary kid. Now we also have overheard sent in to us from people all over the world, maybe even Wales, maybe even Cardiff.

Maybe, maybe Cardiff. If you want to send one in to us, send it into SP y at maximum fun dot org this first one comes from London so not right Ontario remember about is all the Welsh people like put the emphasis on the second syllable like Cardiff was Cardiff and then even London was London London yes I like London. Now this overheard requires you to know about the Charles Camilla tampon phone call. Are you guys familiar with? With this bit of Charles is our king and the head of our of our state and uh, Camilla Is his wife and used to be his nasty little mistress. Yeah, side tease.

And paramour. And at one point he said he wanted to be her tampon. That he wishes that he could be reincarnated as a tampon, which, earth to you Charles, you can't be reincarnated as a sanitary device. Although he's getting pretty close. Did you see his portrait? Like, I mean, the instant flood of people putting him in Vigo's painting was awe-inspiring. But okay, yeah, so that's that just because it factors into the overheard a little bit and when was this like the 90s 80s

Yeah, I would have been when he was like cheating on Diana. So I think early the 90s But yeah, this is from Jane She was on the bus in London and overheard an unhinged phone conversation of an older posh woman with her seemingly male friend who was giving relationship advice to and flirting with at the same time. The whole call had a vibe of a Charles Camilla tampon phone call. One of her questions was, when you went skiing, was there any cha-cha-cha? Yeah, the Rockettes were there. Ooh la la. Yeah, a little hot cha cha at the ski and ski.

Yeah, it was me and Jimmy Durandy. What does she mean? I don't know. I don't know. When you went skiing, was there any cha cha? What does she mean? I don't know. I don't know. And you would skew. Is there any cha-cha maybe in the yeah, in the lodge or with a ski bunny or something like that? So I'm going to just look up on urban dictionary.

Although if this is British to be urbane dictionary in the wake of a full scale war in Ukraine. Sorry about that. Looking up cha cha cha. We couldn't find cha cha haka. Well, that's because I was a typo. Yeah, you jerks. Jerks over there at spell check. But do you guys, John, did you ever ski or you skier?

No, no, never. I only went once. Like I went for like a week. I was, I dated a girl in university who was a big skier and visited her over Christmas. And then she was like, well, if you're coming to hang out with me and my family over Christmas, you better ski. Right. But I grew up in Ontario. Like there's the ski hill there is a reformed mound of garbage. Right. So yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Well, so is my ex. There's too many definitions of cha. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, so is my ex. There's too many definitions of cha cha cha. When I was a kid, though, because I went skiing and there was a lot of like ski school movies that made me believe that skiing was like an incredibly horny sport. And there would be a lot of like old posters of a woman skiing downhill in a bikini or something like that. It really did present itself as a horny, horny, horny time. I feel like it is that that is kind of the culture though, right? Like if you live in Whistler or whatever, it's like you ski all day and party all night kind of thing.

Yeah, I think is the yeah, there were more of like it's now become, I guess it was always like an elitist thing because you need to pay so much to go there, get the equipment, yeah, stay somewhere. But there were people who could afford to like, like if you were just, if you wanted to like take a year off and ski, you could work at the mountain and ski every day and like, it live reasonably comfortably. Now I feel it's extremely elitist.

Yeah, and probably still just as horny, but probably just the hot cha-cha style, upper crust. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, the next one comes from John. This is a six year old, over heard, cute kid. It was on a flight from Philly to Cancun on a flight from Philly to Cancun. Direct flight, Philly to Cancun. Sure.

Twice daily. Twice daily from Philadelphia. It's a commuter route. There was a family behind me, and the son was maybe six years old. Based on their conversation, this was their first trip to Mexico. When we landed in Cancun, he was asking his parents a ton of questions about Mexico. Then he proudly exclaimed, my two favorite states are Mexico and Disney World. Which is correct.

A lot of people don't know that they've annexed two places and they're in their new two states. They thought they might do Puerto Rico and District of Columbia, but no. Guam was on the list. And the Virgin Islands. Apparently there's an old, old standing law that if Canada asks to be part of the United States, the United States has to say yes. How do we ask? Sign me up.

How do we ask? We knock three times. At the White House door. Mr. Biden so? Can we be a state? Yeah, can we be the 51st? Oh my god, we'd be so big. Oh, I know.

Be direct flights up to all these places all the time. America would dominate curling. because they're kept out. That's how we it's all government subsidized. We keep America out of the curly. There is an American. That's right. Element to curling, right? There's people that curl from the states. Yes, Graham. Yes, they are in the sport.

And they actually won the 2018 Olympic gold medal for the men. Son of a bitch. This last one comes from Ken S. in Massachusetts. The other day my wife picked up the game Taboo from a yard sale and was explaining the rules to our 10 year old daughter. This game is exactly the same as the old game Show Password where you get a card with a word on it and then a list of words you are not allowed to use when giving clues to the other person so they can guess it. The card my wife picked as an example had Abraham Lincoln on it

and the phrase is President, Gettysburg Address, Assassinated, and John Wilkes Booth as the words you can't use as hints. My daughter says, okay, but could you say John Milk's Booth? Yep, you figured out an end run, you figured out how to get a rhyming thing. What would it, what would be your thing? It would be the penny, a pimp hat, beard without a mustache. Beard, yeah, the hat was big for sure. Was president one of the words you were allowed to say? Yeah, you weren't allowed to say president.

Weren't allowed to say that. Wrestler? Yeah, wrestler fought a bear when he was only three. Mary Todd, Mary Todd, could you say? Daniel Day-Lewis. Yeah, apparently suffered from depression, but, you know, wasn't diagnosable back in the day. So Mary Todd or Lincoln?

Lincoln. Lincoln had a Mary Todd had, I think they both went as well because their, their kid died, right? And then they, they both apparently that was a, yeah, not great for them. Yeah, I can see that. We Willie Lincoln. they both apparently that was a yeah not great for them yeah i can see that we willy lincoln also this job was very stressful being a president civil war yeah yeah yeah yeah no no you guys excited about the new eric larson book um that's where he does funny cartoons and uh dinosaurs and

chubby guys yeah yeah yeah i don't know what the thing that you asked is. What is that? In addition to numbers that are written in, we also accept your phone calls. Have you done three? Yeah. Yeah. If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one.

Ugh. Spy pod one like these people have. Hey there, Dave Graham, possible guest. This is Jeff from Philly. Call him in with an overheard code flight. Just walking down the street. There's a man and a woman walking behind me.

Were they a couple? No. And I'll tell you why. We were they walked by. There's a cool burger spot. They play, you know, vinyl records type like that kind of history burger spot. He said, oh, this is a place I was telling you about. Well, if I was dating someone, I'd totally take her here. Why are you telling me this?

Why are you telling me this? And then further down the block, then they pop into their actual destination room, which is a Italian bakery, which is also a cute place to take a girl if you were dating her, but it ain't her. Sorry, buddy What what is it get out of here? Oh, you gotta be freaking kidding. What is it? Nope, that's wrong. No freaking way There you go. You nailed it um, so what why was uh Why didn't they like uh, this would be a great place

to take someone on a date. Why are you telling me this? Yeah, yeah, like what are you trying to say? Wings? Yeah. It would be like if you told a girl, hey, I've been told I give really good back rubs. Yeah.

All right, well. Got a selection of oils in my apartment. Well, I'll leave you to it then. It depends on how she says it, right? Cause you could read that the same way as like, why are you telling me this? Yeah, why are you telling me this? Oh yeah.

There's a way you could say that where you're gonna be inviting the question. Yeah. That's an interesting thing to say to me because I am also a capable girlfriend. But then he's saying they go into the bakery. That's still a pretty cute spot for somebody to take a gal. Yeah, I think that chapter was unnecessary.

Yeah, no, I think you're right. The also just trying to picture the what's on the walls at a hipster burger vinyl playing kind of place? Oh, probably Street Science and you know. Roy Orbison records. Yeah, pictures of John Coltrane. Yeah, cool, cool. Oh wait, I'm thinking of Red Robin.

Is that a Canadian only chain or is that all over the place? It's all up and down. Hell yeah. It's all up and down. Hell yeah. It's all up and down and around. Haven't been in a while. Bottomless pop, bottomless fries. Do they do bottomless pop? That's what my recollection was.

Bottomless pop, bottomless fries. Okay, well they do the Tower of Onion Rings. Tower of Onion Rings. Delicious. Next one, Gulp. Hi Dave, Graham, and guests. This is Thomas in Seattle calling in with an overheard. This took place in Seattle's center, not far from the big space needle. And I overheard a man and a woman talking.

And the man said to the woman, So why do you think that Seattle has gone downhill? And the woman replied, No, no, I said that salad has gone downhill. Ever since the pandemic. Ever since the pandemic. What happened to salads in COVID-19? I don't like I feel like people were experimenting with foods in the way that they hadn't before. So maybe salads got too overdone or too oversaturated or people were grilling romaine, things like that, you know, trying new directions.

Oh, I mean supply chain. Yeah, that's true. You know, you can't get cherry tomatoes anymore. Yeah. And people were making their own croutons. They're baking croutons. Yeah. After the bread sucked, they tried to make the bread and it sucked shit. Oh, this is croutons now, actually. When you were growing up, did your croutons, were they in a box or in a bag? Box.

Yeah. They were in a salad that you got at the restaurant. We didn't have in- You didn't have in-home croutons? No. Because like, you know what? We didn't have in-home croutons. You didn't have in-home croutons? No. Because like, you know what, if the chips supply was low and they weren't going to have crackers in the house, you'd be snacking on croutons and stuff.

Are they seasoned in any way? Yeah. They're basically like a, I would choose them as a delicious snack now. Seasoned, do they have like oregano in them or are they just salt and butter? They had like oregano. Yeah, it's like herbal. Okay. Yeah, to me it was like, well let's just get down to business.

Salad's just a, it's a finding thing for... Just a vehicle for... Exactly. Because I have, I made a salad with croutons last night, would I get a bag of just plain croutons. There's nothing seasoned about them. This is this is old and then what I do is I I put them in a bag and I hit them And like kind of crush them up because I like them a little smaller. Okay, sure. Okay, you get big croutons Yeah, my teeth can't handle big croutons

I like to like let a crouton kind of soak in some Salad dressing kind of in the bottom and then eat that kind of flavor bomb Yeah, yeah. Yeah, there were a lot of lots of ways of getting around eating the salads itself and the recipe I was using yesterday They yeah, yeah hit them. I guess it doesn't matter. That's my, my take on it. But then you, you fry a piece of garlic in a pan and you get rid of the garlic. So the, with olive oil.

So the olive oil gets all garlicky. Then you get rid of the piece of garlic and then you cook up the croutons in the garlicky olive oil That sounds pretty good. Oh, that sounds great. Yeah, it is. It's good. Nice. Nice. Yes They it's getting me hungry boys. Yeah. All right. Well, we'll get you can leave it after this final phone call Hi, David and Graham Emily from Vancouver Hey, David and Graham, this is Emily from Vancouver. I was just driving past a Dairy Queen in Fort Moody, and on the billboard, it said two teens for $14.

Awkward. Two teens for $14. Now, I hate to break it to you, lady. That wasn't a Dairy Queen. That wasn't a Dairy Queen. That wasn't a Dairy Queen. The home of the burger family. Yeah burger families at A&W. Can I tell you that I was at an A&W and there was a whole family ordering and I pictured, I was like pictured the person, the cashier being like, don't worry, I got this. One. One Uncle Burger, one Teen Burger. And you look like a chubby chicken. Now, I don't know what A&W stands for.

Wait, I heard that you had a lead on this. I do. I Well, I think I'm going to do a six part investigative series on the origin of the name A&W. What would you call this series? Oh boy, Ambuga Gate. You'll have to listen to the podcast to find out what the full name is,

but Ambuga is, it's a part of my name. Yeah, a lot of people are saying it stands for Allen and Wright. I go deeper. Like I, you know, go all over this great land and I talk to people about what, what A&W possibly stands for. We got first episode, Ryan Beale joins us to discuss what it may or may not stand for. Talk to Root Bear. Yeah.

Oh yeah. Root Bear. Yeah. we have Root Bear. Yeah, we got Root Bear. We got a past guest, Ivan Decker's wife who works for a higher up in the NW franchise or franchise corporation, I think not just a franchise. Yes. Yes. Is it a franchise?

I don't think it is. I don't know anything about how franchises work. Well, franchise is like, you know, I run this location. Like I get stuff from corporate, but it's my place. But it like Starbucks isn't a franchise. Like it's just a place that reports back to corporate. They own all of them. Yeah.

Right. But yeah, I guess I do. I think A&W is franchised, but maybe it's not. And then I, can I then like say, hamburgers are $10,000 today. $10,000? Yeah. You know what, we're only serving hot dogs.

Yeah. Yeah. That's like the Mitch Hedberg joke about how, you know, it says prices and participation may vary and I'm not gonna participate in anything. It's like my McDonald's sells spaghetti and blankets. May you rest in peace that bitch head bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I also like the temporarily stairs. Does that play into this? Yes, yeah. Yeah, you have to climb up them to get to his McDonald's. Yeah, sure. Sorry, we're closed. You don't have to apologize. You don't have to stay open all the time.

Something about a receipt and let's not big pen or paper and ink into this. Yep, I'll file it under D for donut beside my jokes. Look them up. John, thank you so much for being a guest on our podcast today. Oh, thank you for having me back. Absolute pleasure to chop it up with you guys again. And let everyone know the three podcast projects for that you have on the go are.

Well, yes, I do think that I know for a fact, you have a lot of listeners who love Jeopardy and who love Emily Heller. So please check out What is a Jeopardy podcast that comes out every Tuesday. We have listeners who've been on Jeopardy. Yes. Yes. I remember Kit, I believe, was a little guest. Kit's one.

I think there's at least a nut. Oh yeah, there's gotta be. So yeah, check it out. It's called What Is a Jeopardy? podcast. The Broomgate podcast we've been talking about out now. It's called Broomgate, a curling scandal. And then yeah, I've blocked party every week also. That's been going for almost six years with Stefan Heck.

Such a funny podcast, I love it. Thank you. Dave and Graham have both been regular guests on the show. So if you're looking for somewhere to start, that's a great place. Two guys you know and love. Yeah. We have a guest on every week to talk about a time they got blocked on social media. Uh, and then yeah, the pod cast. If you were like me and into the bands, uh, like

corn and Limp Bizkit and Slipknot and Deftones and Lincoln Park, and you want to hear two washed old guys talk about that, that's also wherever you get your pods, the POD cast. Yeah, man, this is a... That's it. You're doing it. You're out there working it.

Have you watched both Woodstock 99 documentaries? Oh, you bet. You bet. I can't believe they blame Fred still, you know? Yeah, well, you know what? Fred's come out, he's come out ahead and now he's like people and their their children can enjoy Limp Bizkit now they're they're they're softer than than they used to be you know it's Fred Durst yeah let's weigh in on this because I feel I used to feel one way

and now I feel another way is Fred Durst handsome oh that's an interesting yes people will say Fred Durst is handsome like Oh, that's an interesting question. Yes, people will say Fred Durst is handsome. Like in that time period, he was with some nice looking ladies, like when Limp Bizkit was very popular. Yeah, yeah. I used to think he just was a normal looking dude. And now I'm like, hey, hey, look at handsome Fred. Especially when you're like, now that he puts on costumes

and stuff, you're like, oh, you can pull this off. You can pull off the cowboy thing. I always thought he was was just mean I thought he always had a mean face on which was not handsome or not handsome But yeah, I think Looking at now handsome chisel jawline. Yeah. Yeah the guy I do the pod cast with He's like six years older than me and he said that when him and his wife first got together Fred Durst was her hall pass. Oh really? Oh He's like six years older than me. And he said that when him and his wife first got together, Fred Durst was her hall pass. Oh, really?

So, yeah, that that going back, I mean, this would have been in the late nineties that in the era they were big, but yeah, she thought Fred was pretty rocking. I get these, I have these realizations sometimes. I remember there was a documentary about Kurt Cobain with Courtney Love in it. And she was like, oh, people, what people don't realize about Kurt Cobain is

he was also like the hottest looking guy. And I was like, really? Oh yeah, I guess so. Yeah. I mean, if you, yeah, like, uh, I was certainly of that era. He was, you know. Yeah. Kurt's a hot guy for sure. I think. Yeah. Nice, really beautiful blue eyes. You know, you can really get lost in those blue eyes. Well, no, I bet with you, if you thought Kurt was hot, then you watched unplugged where he's kind of, you know, he's got the, the hair kind of nice and just so he's got the cardigan, like

casual Kurt, you're like, okay, I could. Yeah, not business. I could take this guy home, you know? And he also like, he had a good, he got, had a good attitude, you know, he. And he also like, he had a good, he had a good attitude, you know? He was, he was a, he was a young up and comer and you know, a rising tide floats all boats kind of guy. Yeah, for sure. Anyways, we miss you Kurt.

And somebody wrote a tweet that said, he got into his dad's car after school one day and his dad just said, Oh, guess what? Your best friend died. And I've heard that before. Wondered if he was talking about his actual best friend and why he was being so cavalier about it. Anyways, we miss you, Kurt. Still a mean way to tell you.

Yeah, I still have jackass well thank you for being a guest here on the podcast and thank you to everyone out there if you think Fred Durst is hot we want to hear from you we do want to put this issue to bed and so and tell us your new metal hall pass yeah yeah yeah who's your crush? Yes. And come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Maximum Fun, a worker-owned network of artist-owned shows supported directly by you.