Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 880 - Christine Bortolin

Episode Date: January 28, 2025

Comedian Christine Bortolin returns to talk riding the Greyhound, Cherry Blossoms, and unexpected sequels. Follow us: Instagram, Facebook, Bluesky.

Hi, he's Dave Schumke. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 880 of Star Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who, boy, he looks good in a light blue shirt and some bright white pants, Mr. Dave Schumke. Yeah, I'm wearing my winter white.

It's your smurf costume. It's my winter white, like that character from Breaking Bad, winter white. It's my Smurf costume. Yeah, it looks good. For real, for real. I have the pants covered my feet as well. That would be Smurf-tastic. Yeah, and that's their thing that they always said was everything was Smurf. Smurf-tastic or...

Smurf, let's go to the Smurf and Smurf. Yeah, oh, I just Smurfed in my Smurf. Yeah, hold on. Oh, no, no, I'm going to Smurf. I'm going to Smurfed in my smurf. Yeah. Hold on. Oh, no, no, I'm going to smurf. I'm going to smurf. It'll be blue. I'm going to smurf. Oh, she smurfed my smurf until I smurfed.

And that could be dirty or not. It could be. Yeah, yeah. She baked my cake until readiness. Yeah, she waxed my car until Im. Of our guest today on the podcast, returning guest, very, very funny comedian. If you watch Erin Reid's comedy special that we talked about last week, Soft Bug Ego Jazz,

you can see her appear in that very special. It's Christine Bordelin. Hello. Hello. How's it going? I never saw this Murphs. No? I missed it.

But I used to work with someone at Dairy Queen that used the word flail for everything. Flail instead of swear word? Can you flail the flail over there? And then we would all know what she's talking about though. Teenager? Was this a teenager? Yeah.

Well, 19, she was a supervisor. Oh, okay, now she's legal. Was she trying on a new attitude or what was going on? No, I don't know. Just flail was a word that it kind of just replaced smurf. Was she trying on a new attitude or what was going on? No, I don't know. Just flail was a word that it kind of just replaced like smurf. I think it just replaced every other word. You just get to that age and you just wanna talk cool.

I had a college roommate who said, it was once like, I'm gonna start, I came up with the best insult. I'm gonna start saying to people, eat my fuck. That's not bad actually. I don't hate that. I see that on a t-shirt. I could see that being a, you know,

maybe a bouncer's tattoo or something like that. It starts a conversation. Yeah. Cause what does it mean? Yeah, exactly. And the way you are, you're in the middle of a conversation. I don't wanna find out. Was it eat my fuck?

Eat my fuck. I like that. All right. Well, our Max Fun Drive pins are coming in. Yeah, yeah. And guess what we want you to eat this year. Should we get to Noah's? Sure.

Get to Noah's. So you flailed, you flail. And then you flailed. Can you go flail the flail and then I would go clean the dishwasher or something. But we always knew what she was talking about. Does dishwasher not clean itself? Well, you have to load the stuff in

and then pull the thing down. Oh, you gotta clean, yeah, okay. So not really. You're cleaning the dishes, but you're not cleaning the dishwasher. Oh no, I feel like a professional would need to come in and do that. Or some guy with a toothbrush.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Have we talked about this on the podcast before that you worked at? Yeah. Yeah, I think so. We've talked about it a lot. Yeah, we don't need to dip more in.

Did you have any other? Nice. Oh, I didn't even think about that. Wow. Did you have a, I mean, we'll talk about it again. Did you have, was there anything really challenging about the job? We once-

Did you have a favorite thing at the job? Turning the thing upside down. That's gonna be our favorite thing. We didn't do it. We refused to do it. We were on strike. Was that Flayle's idea? Not Flayle the Flayle?

I have no idea whose idea it was, but we never had to flip it. One person asked once and the supervisor was like, absolutely not. Wow. We were talking about the the supervisor was like, absolutely not. It's not gonna survive if we do it. We were talking about the blizzard. Yeah, flipping it upside down. But did you have to dip a dip cone

and turn that upside down? I loved dipping the dip cones. You were good at that? I loved it. Did you dip anything else besides a cone? Oh my God, we would dip everything in there. And we would take it out. You ever dip your flail?

And we would put it on. And then you could really eat your flail. Yeah. I don't know what we would like make all these, like I would take like all the bacon and then I would put a bunch of the processed cheese on top of it and then melt it in the heavy duty microwave. And that would be good. That would be a.

Sure. Yeah. That's it's that's, it's, man oh man, it's a feast for the imagination that whenever you're at work and you're allowed to combine like a little bit of this and a little bit of that, making an ultimate coffee drink was my big thing. How many shots could you put in a 20 ounce container? When I worked at a coffee shop, it was getting,

what's it called when people refused to go in out of principle? Boycott? Boycott it. It was getting boycotted because it replaced a high-end but local wine bar that had been booted from there because the rent went up or something. Was this a coffee shop? Yeah, being around the world in Maine and Broadway. Okay. And no one would come in at the beginning, which was awesome for people people working there, because we would just like do our homework. You're not making commissions. Yeah. You're playing volleyball in the back.

Yeah. Aaron, I got Aaron a job there too. It was awesome. Oh wow. And one day we were super bored, so we did like a sports day kind of thing where we just like fucked around with a bunch of different stuff.

And one of the things we did is who could drink the most water? And I drank like, you know, those milk jugs? Yeah, four liters. Yeah, I would drink two of those. You drank eight liters of water? And really, really fast. And I looked like pregnant. Yeah.

And we thought it was really funny, but I was in a lot of pain afterwards. Then I found out you can die from cancer. Yeah, famously that woman, was it for a PlayStation or something like that? For her, she had a radio contest did and she basically drowned herself. Yeah, I thought I was gonna explode, but I just peed it out. Nice.

Yeah, that's how I usually do it, but I don't drink that much. I have a friend who has a giant water bottle that instead of having like milliliters on the side measuring, it has times of day. And it's like, so like at the top it's like 6 a.m. and it keeps going down until whatever, 8 p.m. And it's like, just to drink this much throughout the day,

here's where you should be at noon. Well, what if your head, do you freak out? Like, I wasn't paying attention to all this stuff 2 p.m, oh shit. I'm gonna drown. I tried to get one of those really big bottles of water to drink from it, but it was too heavy. So I held it like a little child with a sippy cup

and had to like sip it slow. And then I just felt like a fool. My wrist was really bothering me. Oh yeah, you've got the wrist things on. I don't have the wrist brace on anymore. But I like, I had, it was just like, it started as a typical kind of, you know, muscle strain or whatever.

And over the weeks, like I made a doctor's appointment before Christmas, cause I was like, this might not get better and it should be better by now. And then it didn't get better. And I couldn't turn a doorknob. Oh, I couldn't like, like doing the dishes was really hard. I couldn't like a liter jug of milk

or a four liter jug of milk was impossible. I had to wipe with my left hand. Oh Dave. Which feels like wipe with my left hand. Oh Dave. Which feels like a stranger's doing it. Ooh. And then like, six weeks went by, it was getting worse and worse.

And then yesterday was my doctor's appointment. And the day before my doctor's appointment, I was like, oh, it's getting better. Yeah. And then I showed up at the doctor and I'm like, well, here's how it did feel. Yeah, your body in a lot of ways wants to humiliate you. Yes. Kind of throughout your entire life.

I just went through this where my leg hurts so, my knee hurts so bad that I couldn't walk on it. And I walk everywhere. So you walk on your knees like Dorf. Yes. And, but I had to put a brace on it. And then luckily I had a fizzy appointment for something else coming up. And he realized that it was, my knee cap was out of the right alignment

and like bonking down on the side because my thighs weren't strong enough to hold my limbs up. Jesus. Isn't that pathetic? Is that according to him? Yeah, but he didn't call me pathetic, I called him. Isn't that pathetic, Christine? But that's pretty sad.

Your thighs aren't strong enough? Yeah. So do you need a thigh master? I think I just need to do some squats every day. Do some squats, hit the gym, pump some iron. A little bit of iron. Yeah. According to everyone I see on Instagram,

squats are the thing to do. Oh sure, squats are huge. According to everyone I see on Instagram, squats are the thing to do. Oh sure, squats are huge. According to my for you page or whatever. Have you ever pumped iron? Have you ever done anything with the weights? Yeah, just like simple stuff. I used to go to a gym and then I went to a studio, but once it shut down, I was like,

I think that's it for me. Yeah, it was a local wine studio and then it became a coffee place. Yeah, what do those guys do when they're monkeying around a bunch of gym guys? Well, they're drinking a bunch of water. And also, how many weights can we put on the machine weights and see if it breaks, that kind of stuff?

Whoa, yeah. How much protein powder can we eat dry? Yeah, let's do the protein challenge. Do you lift weights? Yeah, I lift do the protein challenge. Do you lift weights? Yeah, I lift weights. Nice. You're a big beefy guy. I'm a big beefy guy.

Do you go somewhere for this? I do, yeah, I don't have weights at home. Okay. Your downstairs neighbors would be like, What the hell's going on? Knock it off over there. Also, there's no way to have weights in your home and not look awful.

They look awful. Yeah, yeah. It has to be in a garage or something like that. You can't have a section of the living room that's just. What's your favorite weight lift? Oh, I like. Yeah, I'm out. The amount. What are you, a 35 guy?

Oh, yeah, I mean, it depends on the activity. The one thing that is for sure is the lightest weights at the gym, the lightest kettlebells, bright pink. So you can't miss them, you can't miss them out on the floor. You're really drawing attention to your so many bright pink weights. They could have done any other color. All sorts of color, it could be red.

Yeah. Yeah, it could have been brown would be fine. What's wrong with bright pink? Just draws the eye. Then you can see that they're two pound weights. Yeah, exactly. Mine are light lavender. I have a pair of two pounds.

Those are the only ones I have. And my cat sleeps on them. She uses them as a headrest. So they're not mine anymore. Yeah, so it's not your problem. Yeah. What? She can lift herself off on her thighs.

She's strong enough. Yeah, she, yeah. She's not throwing anything out of alignment. Were you doing something that caused your knee to go? I did go on a four hour hike. So that could have been it in the cold, but I walk, I truly walk everywhere. Yeah.

Well, when I went to the doctor, I was like, there was no event that caused my wrist pain. It was just like. You're like, it hurts since New Year's Eve. No, it's hurt since like a weekend in December, but it doesn't hurt anymore and nothing caused it to hurt. It's an injury that there was no injury that caused no, it caused pain, but the pain's gone.

Did they tell you to do anything? I have to go get an x-ray. Oh, that makes sense. X-rays are so funny because you go in and it like the wait is so long and then you do the x-ray, you're out. You're done. And I'm really worried they're gonna be able

to see through my clothes. Yeah, yeah. And they'll be able to see your secrets. So I wear, that's why I wear lead underwear. Do you write all your secrets on your bones? Tell the truth. I did, I did once when I was a teenager and now I'm so embarrassed by them.

Yeah, when's the last time you got an X-ray? I'm just trying to keep your file up to date. When's the last time I got an X-ray? I don't know, does getting an ultrasound count? Sure. It's kind of like an X-ray. Yeah. It's imaging.

Yeah. Imaging poots. No. I can't remember. I'm not very good at that type of stuff. Oh, I think I got one when I got an ETI so bad, it turned into a kidney infection. Hmm.

So things are evolving within me. Yeah. How about you, Dave? When's the last time you got an x-ray? I think that's a couple of years ago I broke my finger. Oh nice, which one? Middle finger? Pushing it up too hard.

This pinky. Oh pinky, that's cool. Left pinky, yeah. Did you have to wear a little brace on it? I wore a little guy. For the time he was wearing a really heavy pinky ring. Honestly I don't remember. I feel like I still feel a little bit of pain.

I might've been left middle finger actually, because that's where I feel the most pain right now. But then I had to go to the doctor, like, I don't know, did nothing and then said, all right, well, I booked your appointment at the clinic, the hand clinic. And it was like. There were magicians there that were all fucked up.

No, there were tons of like people with like huge hand injuries and like, and I had my one widow finger hoed. But I used to hoed, it feels better now. When I was a kid, we didn't go to the doctor if we broke a finger. We would go if it was hand, but if it's finger stuff, we just did it at home.

Yeah, just taped it to another finger. Yeah, yeah. Because that's all they can do anyway. Yeah, I mean, they can pass judgment on the way that you hurt it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you mean nothing happened? What do you mean that nothing happened,

it just started hurting? Give us the real scoop. What were you up to? Smell my finger. Yeah, it's, you went for a four hour hike. Where did you go for a four hour hike? Well, two hours in, two hours out. Yeah.

That's true. I don't know where, well, we went around Stanley Park and then we walked around the city a bit. So I guess I'm adding the city park. I'm gonna say that's a four hour walk. Yeah, I was gonna say that's a walk. Yeah, it's a walk, What's the difference between a hike? It's a walk, it's not a hike.

That's true. Unless you step on dirt. Yeah, and I think you have to be, hiking has to go. Inclined. Or you can hike at ground level, but it has to be dirt. Yeah, that's true.

If you're just walking along the road, well, hitchhiking, that's a four-mile hike. Oh yeah. Whoa, when's the last time you hitchhiked? 20 years ago. Yeah. Probably, you? I think I hitchhiked when I was like 19 on the island once

and I was like, I am lucky to survive. That was really stupid. Oh yeah. I went once with, when I was 19 or 20 with a guy and we were picked up by a woman. And I was like, man, this woman's stupid. She should not have picked up a true man. Yeah.

Yeah, it's wild. I didn't really think about it at the time. I was with my friend and the Greyhound on the island dropped us off in the middle of nowhere on the highway. So we kind of just got off the highway and needed to get into Duncan or out of Duncan or something. Very typical Greyhound, like this is it. Yeah.

Just take your bag. That's a lot to you. Yeah. Yeah, it's like sometimes it's not even at a gas station or anything. No, it was just on the side of the highway in the middle of nowhere. it was just like rock. Yeah, oh Jesus.

But we survived. Yeah, and look, and you're better and wiser for it. Oh yeah. I've only done it once. Me too. I did it a bunch of times when I was here and there was a city-wide transit strike, so you couldn't get a bus or anything

and they couldn't afford cabs Because you didn't in the city. Oh, yeah. Whoa. Yeah pretty much every day And so like it was kind of fun I said there's one woman similar to you like pick me up and was like keep your hands on the dashboard the whole time Whoa, why did you pick me up? Maybe she did nails. Oh, yeah Those are bad buddy. Anyways, give me a ring I feel like that's where I get bullied the most in life is that the nail salon? Oh, yeah, Those are bad, buddy. Anyways, give me a ring. I feel like that's where I get bullied the most in life

is at the nail salon. Oh, yeah? It can be pretty harsh. What are they? Do you get fingers or toes? I usually just get fingers. But what are they, how do they? If you have anything from the past,

they're like the last person to do this, did an awful job. It was you, don't you remember? Or they'll just like talk to you about how your nails look and stuff. I chew my hands, so that's always a topic of conversation. Or if I want them, if I get fakes and I want them to be short enough to type, they're like, okay. Why bother? Yeah.

How does, because I mean, I've only had scrubby man nails my whole life. How do you do all the typing and things with the longer than? Oh, you can get there. You chew gum, you got a bunch of pencils in your beehive. I think you like start to use the pads, the sides of the pads. Because I always thought like doing something on the phone would be difficult with the, but maybe not. It's not so bad because you can just like use the, I mean, it's better if they're like,

remember the old days when you'd have a phone that had like, you could press down on the keys. You're saying that like, with like so much nostalgia. I miss it. Like the Nokia that just had Snakey on it. And you had to do T9 texting. Yes, I love T9, cause I wouldn't need to look at it to do it. So in class, I could just be texting the whole time

and then just go look down for a second to read it and then look up and then go back. That's how I drive. Just one. Texting the whole time, look down every 10 words. Oh, I see. But it's amazing how many people still text and drive. That's scary. Oh, I see, but it's amazing how many people still text and drive.

That's scary. I see, like I'll be, you know, driving or walking and I'm at a corner waiting for this other car to go. I'm just like trying to look at their eyes to make sure. Yeah. And their eyes are, they're not even looking at the road. They're just looking at it. My eyes are up here.

But they think they're very coy. They're like, no one knows that I'm just. Yeah, I could just be staring at my crotch. Yeah. I could be a pervert. Yeah, staring at my own crotch. I'm a pervert. I've got GPS in my crotch.

I like the pervert that's no problem to anybody else. Just like, I look at my own crotch. In the privacy of my own vehicle. Yeah, it's my fetish. Yeah. Does it hurt anybody? Does it affect anybody? I just can't get off without my own crotch.

Oh, yeah. Got a photo album of it at home. I do it now so I can think about it later. I don't send dick pics to anyone, but I do photograph it myself and it's my screen saver that comes up. Yeah. It's like those scenes in a horror movie where he's doing his own developing and there's just row after row after row of crotch shots of his own crotch.

Harmless fun, really. Oh, yeah. Did you ever go on a fantastic road trip on a Greyhound or anything like that or a car or any such? I used to go to improv camp when I was a teenager and it would be a 30 hour bus ride to Saskatchewan to Lumsden Beach. Wow. And that was pretty intense.

And I'm very unfortunate for everyone on the bus that wasn't an for everyone on the bus that wasn't an improv kid and the bus driver. Oh, there were people on the bus that weren't improv people? Yeah. Oh my God, I killed myself. I know, it was the cheapest option for us kids.

So we would, and then along the way, you'd pick up more of them that were coming from Alberta and then other places in Saskatchewan and then we'd all get there and I just cannot. One year I woke up from a brief nap and there was a ton of people on the bus singing Bohemian Rhapsody. I was like, I even I was like this. I'm just a poor boy.

I need no sympathy. This was before noise canceling headphones. What would you do? Like there's- You'd be stuck. You can't afford, if you're on the Greyhound bus, you can't afford to get there any other way. Yeah, but I think you can't jump to another bus.

No, I don't think so. Unless you were willing to wait. Like speed step. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

They would just, would have to just suck it up or get violent. So like 30 hours you're sleeping how much, how many of those hours? 16? Barely. I would say like maybe four hours. Did you have a friend to go with? Yeah, I mean usually I'd know someone and Erin would come too so it wouldn't be very difficult. And we'd like see friends along the way. It was nice for us, but I just imagine that being, like now being on that bus, I'd probably just get off and be late for whatever I needed to get to. I was walking my dogs the other day

and there was a family of four, like a grandparent, two parents, and a 12 year old boy. And he was just singing 99 bottles of beer on the wall. Again? Yeah. And doing it like going through the whole thing. It was something else. It was, it changed some of the lyrics.

Yeah, because they don't drink alcohol. Dummers. 12 year olds. But I was like, we weren't on a car ride or anything. I was just out in the open, but they were walking half a block behind me and I was like, I'm surprised how annoyed I am by this. This is so annoying. This song just keeps going and even though I'm out in nature.

It's not like a nice melody either. It's just plinky-plonky. I was on a plane once with a, I think I want to say a rugby team, a teenage rugby team. And it was a late flight, so it was basically me and them. And they were so bad. They were unbelievable. To the point that I was like,

is the pilot gonna have to land this plane? Because they were like, they're throwing shit around. Yeah, they were throwing shit around and climbing all over the seats and stuff. I was like, when did, and the flight attendant vanished. Like she was not in the scene. I was like, yeah. And I was like, when did, and the flight attendant vanished. Like she was not in the scene. Yeah, I was like, good, good for you.

But yeah, honestly, I thought they were making such commotion that I'm like, what does happen? Who's in, am I in charge? Wild. Get off my plane. The only good thing is if it would have gone down, there's a good chance that you'd survive. Oh yeah. For a rugby team.

Yeah, yeah. That's right. I'd you'd survive. Oh yeah. You're a rugby team. Yeah, yeah. That's right. I'd get to eat them. Yeah. It's a good chance that you'd survive. What does that mean? Well, they'll figure it out. We sorted it out last time.

I think you just die in the crash or not, and then they figure it out. Then they figure it out. Yeah. Did you watch that movie, Alive? Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I watched that, and then I watched

a documentary about it as well. I watched a documentary, that's why it's on my mind. So amazing, it's a true miracle. Yeah, have you seen it? No, I saw, it was on Super Channel when I was a kid, so I saw bits of it. The pilot was played by local Vancouver theater critic, Jerry Wasserman.

Whoa, he was in Watchmen too, right? Oh yeah, Wasserman and Watchmen. Wait, he has a beat named after him? No, someone else has a beat. Isn't it Wasserman's Beat? No, Wasserman is. It might be Wasserman's Beat, but I feel like it's not after the actor.

Maybe I'm wrong. No, there was a writer. There was a writer and it's like on house? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not Wasserman. It's something else. Waterman? Water Man? Water Man.

Someone is gonna, someone knows this. Yeah, cause they, like, they, of course, they had to eat some of the people who died, but it's not in the, like, it's not. They're pretty respectful about it. Yeah, and it's not like you would think it of, like, a gross kind of movie where they, it's like a blood squirting out of it, or,

it's all frozen. So it's just like a gross kind of movie where it's like a blood squirting out of it or it's all frozen. So it's just like frozen chicken kind of thing. And- It's wild. The story is wild. Yeah. How they got saved. No, they just ate it.

They don't think they had- They had a bunch of booze. Yeah, they had booze and they had- And cigarettes. Chocolate and cigarettes. And, but then they had to like make themselves close to hike down the mountain, and they didn't really know where they were going.

And there was an avalanche at one point that the guys survived. And then when they were—I don't want to ruin the end— but when they were going to—they finally saw people, these locals in the area, they were waving at them, and the locals were like, we'll come back tomorrow. Then they left and came back tomorrow, the next day. And then sorted them out. Yeah.

Wild. It's like, I mean, the good thing for the rest of your life, you get to be a keynote speaker every day. Cameo, if cameo was around back then. Oh, getting a cameo for somebody in the group of a life. Oh my gosh. My sister was saying. Happy birthday.

My sister went to college in California and her like graduation speaker was the actor who played Uncle Phil. Oh, nice. On Fresh Prince. James Avery. Yeah, the voice of Shredder. That'd be fantastic. But apparently the year before, it was Bill Clinton. While he was in office.

It just shows you like who the student president's like. The last year's really had it together. This guy didn't think about it until two weeks before. Call everybody. Go on Cameo and find who's available. We got the guys from the Las Vegas Pond Stars show. Oh yeah, what's his name, Chumlee? Is it Pond Stars? Is that the show?

Yeah, Pond Stars. I feel like it's either Cameo or OnlyFans. It kind of go to it, like 90 Day Fiance people too. Like in the- They're on OnlyFans? Yeah, oh yeah. So many people. Doing sex stuff?

I think it's mostly photos. But I don't know. It kind of like- Yeah, OnlyFans was not, it wasn't set up to be the porno site that it is. And then they even tried to kick all the porno people off. But I think a lot of it does turn into that. Oh yeah, you gotta.

I wonder if Kate Gosling is on OnlyFans. I don't know who Kate Gosling is. John and Kate Plus 8, she had the crazy hair. She was the original Karen, the original Karen hair? Yeah, she was the original Karen. Whoa, really? I know the haircut. Yeah, that's the haircut. Yeah, she's the original Karen. Whoa, really? Yeah. I know the haircut. Yeah, that's the haircut.

Whoa, she had her own show. And she had eight children? Eight children. With John. With John, and they split up, and John became, he did appearances like a cameo, but in real life. And he, remember, he's DJing at a fourth tier

Las Vegas pool party kind of thing. Wait, did he turn out to be a creep? I don't know. I didn't really pay attention, but yes. He just became a loser. I think we don't need to look it up and you can safely probably see it. I think he was hanging out with Christian Odigier, the guy who designed all the Tapout shirts.

Were they Tapout or Affliction? Whoa. Tapout. I think definitely Ed Hardy, but or Affliction or? Whoa, Tap Out. I think definitely Ed Hardy, but then he started his own. Whoa, cool. Anyway, they had sex tuplets and twins. Yeah, and it was kind of the first of that type of show,

wasn't it? Like the crazy family reality show. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, right. I mean, the Osborns were the original crazy family reality show. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, right. I mean, the Osborns were the original crazy family reality show. Sharon! Right?

I can't figure out the remote control. Good news, everybody, we've got Ozzy Osborn for our graduation speech. We've got AJ and Big Justice for our graduation speech. Class of 2024, you bring the boom. So that's great. Yeah. Yep, absolutely.

Whatever we were talking about was great. Yeah, I don't know how we got there, but we got there. We got there via the Greyhound. Oh yes, yeah. And why, do you have any insights into why this improv camp was in Lumsden, Saskatchewan? No, I think it was just kind of like a cheap place that would allow it.

Was it like a camp? Yeah, it was like a true camp where they had cabins and then like a mess area, and then you do like clean up duty and stuff, and then you learn about improv and do little performances and stuff. Were you so sad when it was over. We were like, this feels good.

I thought it was fun and I liked it, but I was fine with it being over. I'm not very good at like, I don't hold onto things a lot. No? No. I would like to be more like that. I feel like that, I think for that reason,

sometimes I don't like get motivated and stuff or I don't know. I really try to hold on to relationships like friendships. Oh, I know exactly what you mean. Yeah. When people are like at school at the end of the school year when people will be like, yeah, I'll miss you all summer. I was like, oh, okay. I just feel like I'll probably talk to the people that I need to talk to.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, or I won't and I'll see you in September. Yeah. I'm trying to be better about that now. Just like being nostalgic or being just connecting with people? Connecting and making sure that I'm reaching out to people and stuff. It's just so easy for lots of time to go by and not reaching out and making sure that I'm hanging out with my friends who I really care about.

I know it does feel like, sometimes it feels like The Sims, where it's like, okay, well, our friendship bar is going down. So I, I don't text them. I got to send them a meme. And do you have anybody that you, well, I guess you and Aaron went to school together. Cause that's weird thing to have somebody it's knowing you, well, I guess you and Erin went to school together. Yeah. Cause that's weird thing to have is somebody it's knowing you your whole teenage to adult life. Yeah, it's fun. It's good in some ways, but also other ways we, well, I don't know, I think it's just mostly good.

Yeah. I can't really think of a negative of it. Who in this city has known you the longest? Yeah. My friend Christina, who I went to junior high with. Wow. And she's a crown prosecutor. And she-

Whoa. We went to, yeah, we went to school together in Calgary and then she moved out here and I moved out here. And yeah, so still friends with her all these years later. And it's amazing how- And you're like, you talk about Oh, yeah, we had Christine on the podcast this week. And she's like, I locked up on another dirt bag. Yeah, yeah,

yeah. She's very, she's very like Kathy Bates, Matlock esque. Oh, nice. You don't take no shit. No, she's like incredibly good at her job. And but she's, you know, when somebody's known you for that long, they can be like, oh yeah, you're always saying that. Yeah. And then you can be like, oh shit,

have I been saying that for? 20 years. 20 years, yeah. Graham was in a junior high 20 years ago. And look at me now. I dropped out of junior high, never looked back. Cause I was always saying that thing over and over, and you're still saying it.

I'm still saying it. I hate school. You're still bringing it up, man. I hated school so much. And like, as an adult, I realized what an intense privilege that is to have school and free education and all this stuff. But as a kid, you're just like, fuck this.

This is like, that teacher sucks. That teacher sucks. And as a kid, you're just like, fuck this, this is like. That teacher sucks. That teacher sucks. And now you're like, oh my God, he had to get to school at. Yeah. 730 in the morning, stay till five. Probably volunteered to be like one of the coaches. He had his own family. Had to talk to teenagers all day.

Yeah. And then work with the same people all the time. For no money. For no money, yeah, exactly. But when you're a kid, you're like, all these people just wanna punish kids. Yeah, this guy hates me. Well, he might have.

Yeah. You look back. What about you, Dave? Who's known you the longest in town? I live here. I'm from here. But like, of people I know, I might be like Taz or Aaron Salazar, just like people I went to high school with.

And then there's also friends I've known since grade one. Are they like, you're still saying that thing about give me my ball back? Oh, past guest Dan Worm, I guess I've known since grade one. Wow, that's cool. He's like, what is he? He's a Crown prosecutor. He's like, not a scientist exactly.

He's a scientist of some, yeah, of some kind. Crown scientist. Researcher, he's some kind of science research man. Did either of you at any point growing up have any designs on being a scientist? Mad scientist. Yeah? Yeah.

It's telling things together that shouldn't go together. Like, you know, making a potion that explodes and then you walk out of the lab and your hair's all crazy and your face is covered in smoke. Like those two mice, those famous mice. Pinky and the Brain? Yes. Yes. Those famous mice.

Those famous mice. What's the- Pinky and the Brains. Yes. Those famous mice. Mickey and Minnie. I mean, boy, they're probably the second most famous pair of mice. Sure.

Yeah. Did Jerry from Tom and Jerry have a pair of more? Oh, I don't know. Oh. Did Chuck E. Cheese ever bang around? Yeah, but it was the chicken lady. Oh yeah? Yeah.

The lady of the band. Do you ever go to Chuck E. Cheese when you were a youth? Oh yeah, I remember it vaguely. Cause Pleiadium came in and that changed everything. Oh, we talked about that last week with- Yeah. What was your, his childhood mall, he said was low heat, but in Metro town was the special event mall.

Yeah, that makes sense. I think me, it was a Brentwood. The amazing Brentwood? Well, this is before it was amazing. It was more of a wholesome Brentwood at that time. There was like a store that just sold like yards of cotton. It was called like Cotton County or something. That's pretty good.

Yeah. Yeah. It was like the best mall ever cause you could go there on boxing day and it wasn't busy. We got great deals on cotton. But Metro Town was like the killer mall. And then Lohede, if I was skipping school, which is often, I would go there probably because it was walking distance from my school.

What would you do on a skipping school day? Go smoke? No, I would get secondhand smoke. I liked secondhand smoke. Go get it. Procure it. Go over to some strangers. From the smoke pit, yeah.

But we would just kind of like walk outside and go down to the like fish ladders, like where like the fish would like hop around because there was salmon that were in the creek. And you just kind of like hang out outside or you'd go to the mall. That's kind of like the only two options we had. Yeah, that's about right.

There was an alley by the school that you could stand around. outside or you'd go to the mall. That's kind of like the only two options we had. Yeah, that's about right. There was an alley by the school that you could stand around. I never skipped school, not once. Wow. Not a single class. Never? Never. Well, cause they would call home.

I heard about kids, you know, the automatic thing. If you're absent from a class, it automatically calls your house and says, you're absent. Oh, they didn't do that. Also, I didn't, I didn't wanna do, I didn't know where to go. I was not a good kid, but I was afraid of being a bad kid. Yeah. That's fair.

Which is basically good. Yeah. Yeah. Um, yeah. He got the same thing in the end. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, yeah. I, uh, there was a mall that we went to, Sunshine Mall.

Ooh, Sunshine Mall, that's a great name. Yeah, and it had a lot of cool stores, like Video Game Store, San Francisco Novelty Store, Oh yeah. HMV. West 49? No, that never made it into Elber. The Sunshine?

Oh, that's too bad. As a youth, I don't think that. But yeah, skipping school was the best. And my mom was cleaning out some old boxes at my place. And she found a book where it was her signature, like hundreds of times that I had figured out how to just be practicing over and over again. Yeah, I knew kids who like they would skip school and they knew that the call always comes at five o'clock.

Make sure you answer the phone at five o'clock. My buddy Phil, he would race home. He'd like skip the last kind of, he'd say I gotta go to the bathroom or something and run home and then take the call off because he would skip school every day. Whoa, that's wild. They did not call home or anybody when we skipped.

You just got to choose to forego your education, I guess. Which was fine. Sure, sure. Yeah, that was never something like in pop culture about skipping school. There was never any repercussions for people other than. Failing. Even then.

Oh really? I don't know, I'm trying to think of like. There's Mueller, there were repercussions if he got caught. That's true, but that was nine times. She didn't know he had been absent nine times. Do you run with a bad crew or? No, I think I ran with like, we were, I think we were all like, not, I don't wanna say losers, but we were just kinda like, we weren't unpopular

and we weren't popular, but we just didn't really exist very much in the ecosystem. And nobody was doing great. And a lot of us like started to skip to work. Like that was just kind of normal. Like, and I was like, very quaint. When you said skip to work, I was picturing you going to work.

Me too, yeah. Well, time to skip to work. Good day, Mr. Blue Jay. I can't wait to make a peanut butter parfait. We were watching, we've been watching a lot of teen movies. Oh cool. With the kids and- For example?

For example, Mean Girls. Oh yes. Oh nice. And they go, Mean Girls, she goes through the, they all have this scene in them. She goes through the cafeteria they all have this scene in them, where she goes through the cafeteria and someone's pointing out, these are the plastics. These are the drama kids.

These are the horny band kids, whatever. And then in Clueless, it's the same thing of like- This group. Yeah. And then in 10 Things I Hate About You, it's so weird. Like I don't understand if they're making fun of this trope in teen movies or if it was just a joke.

And of course the Cowboys are over here and there's like a bunch of guys dressed in like tight jeans and cowboy hats and doing lasso tricks in Seattle. We legitimately had like cowboy kids in my house. Whoa, really? Yeah. Like they worked like they actually had to like they had to skip to-

Yeah, I think they- Skip to slop. Yeah, and they had, wore cowboy boots and a couple of them wore cowboy hats, but mostly it was just there was farm cowboy kids. Yeah, their life was so different than the rest of it. Like at the end of the day, they were just around a horse, probably got to ride a horse.

They probably had to wake up early and like help out. Yeah. It was like a very. Their alarm clock was a rooster. Yeah. The alarm clock's broken. No, the rooster just died. One thing, I don't know where I was a rooster. Yeah. The alarm clock's broken. No, the rooster just died.

One thing, I don't know where I was, but I was somewhere where there was a rooster and like you'd, the roosters are famous for the crow when the sun comes up. Yeah. But they continue to all day long. You think of it as just like one time and it wakes everyone up and then, okay, go sit on your eggs.

You over there, sit on your eggs. I'm a rooster, sir. I don't have any. Yeah, I don't think I've ever been woken up by anything but my own. Sense of dread? Yeah. I'm white some dread. Yeah, yeah. I'm white hot panicking.

Do you ever have that thing where you're drifting off to sleep and you, maybe you're even dreaming right now, like, but you're barely asleep and then in your dream, you like fall down and you wake up and go, ugh. Yes. Oh yeah, so many times. It's always like tripping. I have insomnia and I've always had it.

So I go through like, well, you have a gram, right? Yeah. So like, you know, sometimes you just lay there for hours to try to get that kind of rest instead. Do you still always have it? I take drugs now. Oh, nice. That's been my solution.

That's really smart. Once in a while, I'll take one. I've tried a few now. What's your fave? My favorite drug? What's the drug? Well, you are my favorite drug. Thank you. But what is, you are my favorite drug. Thank you.

But what is, you're my present this year. Put a bow on me. Yeah, what is your, have you gone through, have you tried a bunch? Yeah. And what's, what's, what's kickin'? The one that I'm on now, I can't remember the name of it, but it's, I think I tried like five different ones.

Yeah. And there's some that you're not supposed to take every night, and there's ones. This one's fine to name of it, but I think I tried like five different ones. And there's some that you're not supposed to take every night, and there's ones. This one's fine to take every night, but. Is it melatonin? Can you imagine? It's a gummy. No one ever recommended that before.

Yeah, melatonin gave me intense nightmares. Yeah. Whoa, really? Yeah, yeah. Same. I don't know how it works for anybody. It's so mild. I know, but some kind of reaction to it.

Tweaks in the brain or something. Yeah, because I remember like having like, waking up like heart pounding, terrible, terrible. Yeah. What is a nightmare? Uh. I mean, I know what they are, but like, I maybe, I don't know if I've ever had one,

but I- Now I'm trying to picture like one of your boring dreams, but a nightmare. Yeah. Abby has what she calls thrilling dreams. Like there's always just chasing and stuff. Oh, that sounds nice. But they're intense as you wake up, but they're not nightmares. But like, are you in your nightmares?

Are, are they in your nightmares? Are they all the same kind? No, not for me. Sometimes I'll have ones that have a storyline and then others are just like intrusive thought type stuff where it's like the same vivid graphic horrible image that will wake me up. But I mean, it's just your brain trying to mess with you

and you're like, not today brain. You have this thing I've noticed, and I've read a bit about it, where you go to the same place in your dream as a place that doesn't exist, but it exists in your dream world and several dreams take place in that location. There's a house that a lot of my dreams take place in.

Whoa, I never even thought about that. But I don't know what the house is. I've never seen the house in real life or anything like that. I have like TV shows and movies that I watch in my dreams And I can go to certain episodes and watch them. Are they real? No. Oh, well, I mean I made them up But I mean I've had them for years so I can be like, oh I want to see that scene But maybe this person's Wow this person doing this Do you have that cuz I think it's from just like laying there for hours every night all my life

Uh, I get more like like I only usually catch the very last end and remember Do you have that? Because I think it's from just like laying there for hours every night all my life. I get more like, like I only usually catch the very last end and remember. Oh yeah. But I just noticed like, there's very current dreams, but there's dreams that are completely different. But I'm like, well, we're in Morocco again. We're back here in Morocco.

Somewhere I've never been. Yeah, exactly. Do I like Morocco? Do I not like Morocco? But yeah, like even the nightmare ones, I don't necessarily remember after I wake up, but yeah, it's not bad. I got to recommend drugs, man. Whoa, yeah.

I've tried a few now, but maybe I'll ask you which one is working for you. Yeah. Maybe I'll try that one next. It's just a cold 45 booze. Just a good book. Yeah. Yeah. He just hands you an Anne Rice.

This is a dry one. I think it'll work great. Honestly, like nothing knocks me out faster than reading while lying down. Yeah. Whoa. How long does it take, 10 minutes? If I, at night? Yeah.

One page. Wait, so are you processing what you're reading or is it kind of just like the act of reading it bores you? Or like what is it? No, it doesn't. It's like exercise for my brain and eyes and I'm like, this is too much, man. I'm putting this book down.

Oh, that's good. Yeah, that is nice. I think that means your brain is healthy. Oh, well, according to a lot of comedy audiences would disagree. He's pretty twisted. I'm a pretty twisted guy. I'm a pretty twisted guy.

No, that's one thing I'm very grateful for, is I'm good sleeper. Yeah. That's great. You know, I give good back rubs. Oh, sure. Famous back rubs. Wow. Yeah, yeah.

Lucky is the person who gets that certificate, coupon book coupon. Or sometimes you like coupon books that you got at school. Gun for One, Rob from Dave Shumka. At school? Did you sell those like coupon books for like... Oh, for like, oh, Entertainment 95 or whatever? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That would be like, yeah. Orange Julius. Yeah, yeah, yeah, like just coupons, like the whole Bible-sized thing of coupons. Yeah. I would probably still be into that. Yeah. There's, yeah, everything's a checkout code now.

Yeah. And it's like, there's places like Orange Julius, you're like, if I could get one free, I already want Orange Julius. Absolutely. Yeah, give me another Orange Julius. Yeah, and then you get to like have this little piece of paper, like I feel like it was thicker card stock

than what I remember. Yeah. The actual book, the entertainment book that you would get was you would need a card. Like you would need to use the card and the coupons at the same time. So they knew that you weren't like, just like handing out the coupons to your friends.

Right. Right. That makes sense. But it was, yeah. I, I, I've never given a coupon and had the cashier be like, oh, excellent. I know how to do that. This won't take any extra time at all. And I'm sure this is legitimate

and I'm not gonna put up a fuss. But it was always advertised as like, save $10,000 worth of coupons. But it's like some of them were like, if you buy a boat, you get a free anchor or something like that. If you're getting your nails done, we'll do the pinkies free.

Yeah, man, that really unblocked it. Does McDonald's still say smiles are free on the? They're not free anymore. They're not? Nothing's free anymore, buddy. I guess they don't even have those menus up there. It's all like video screens. That's tough when the video screens switch all the time and they have ads, because I'm like,

I just want to see if you're selling cheeseburgers right now. You know, like, I just want to know if it's a time of day where I can get a hash brown still, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. Because hash browns aren't all day, I don't think. But I could be wrong, but I don't know. We bought these.

I know you're talking about the video screen. Yeah. I don't know what took us for so long, but we found, they sell frozen hash browns, Cavendish frozen hash browns, that are like in the shape of the McDonald's hash brown. And I don't know, like it's, they're in the same places, you know, fries, frozen fries, but they're just amazing.

They're good. What do you put them in, the toaster or do you put them in the oven? Oven. So they're crispy on the outside? They're crispy,. They're good. What do you put them in, the toaster or do you put them in the oven? Oven. So they're crispy on the outside? They're crispy, 10 minutes. Oh. At 425, 10 minutes and then flip it over

into the other side for 10 more minutes. Where is this? Where'd you get this from? The grocery store. Just the regular grocery store? Yeah. Not like Whole Foods or just the regular old- Cavendish, Cavendish hash brown.

Cavendish is an every man brand. Yeah. I've heard of it before. Yeah, it's sort of like next to the McCain. Nice. Oh, cool, I'm gonna get some today. Sure, okay. That just sounds so satisfying.

It's great, yeah, we really. Do you put anything on them? Do you put like a little sour cream or? I mean, the kids get a bit of ketchup. A little bit of ketchup. I don't really eat them. No? No, I make them.

Yeah. I've had some bites. They resemble the McDonald's ones. Yep, yep. And do they, because I haven't been in McDonald's over a decade, do they still come in a little envelope? I think so, a little sleeve. A little like oil soaked sleeve.

Yeah. Okay, good. Cause that was one of the pleasures of having them. Yeah, McDonald's breakfast kicks ass. Yeah. Good stuff. McGriddles. McGriddles are the bomb diggity.

No. What does the Rizler have to say about it? The Rizler? Yeah. The Rizler doesn't say much. She does this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. There was somebody posted a video of the Rizler and some other woman that has gone viral and they were doing each other's catchphrase. Oh yeah, the Chick-fil-A sauce woman. I was like, man, oh man, I only know the Rizler because of you. And the Chick-fil-A, I was like,

I do not know what the joke is here. I don't know either of these characters. Yeah, the Rizzler is sort of a part of the AJ and big justice. We give this five big booms universe. Okay, okay. Yeah. And then the universe.

And then the Chick-fil-A, no Chick-fil-A sauce lady. I don't know. I don't know anything about her. Is that her catchphrase? Yeah. Oh, you know what? She had a viral video where she was working at Chick-fil-A and someone came up and ordered Chick-fil-A

and they ordered like, I'll have barbecue sauce and honey mustard. That it? Yeah, that's it. And she's like, no Chick-fil-A sauce? And this is entertainment now. She's got a five picture deal with Paramount. Yeah, she's got a first look deal on all her Chick-fil-A.

So that's her whole thing, she says no Chick-fil-A sauce? I guess it's not anything worse than the Chewbacca mom. Yeah, maybe she said it in a way that was really funny. You might chuckle at it. I think she made a face, yeah. Oh yeah. She maybe said it in a funny way. I think I only saw the video once and I don't wanna do it.

Yeah, that's fair. I don't wanna do it, you know. Yeah. Injustice. Injustice's fair. I don't wanna do it, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Injustice. Injustice, yeah. Or misjustice. If you're nasty.

I was gonna say if you're nasty all that. Yeah, but you didn't. I know. Dave, what's going on with you? Well, my wrist, doing better. Yeah. Nice. Look at that.

Wow, you're turning it so easily. Wow, it's a bit paler there. It hurts here. Okay. It is a a bit paler there. It hurts here. Okay. It is a little bit paler in the section. Where? On this side. Is it the same on the other wrist?

Yeah, there is like a little, or maybe that's from a watch or something. Well, this is a burn. Oh, okay. Burn shouldn't be paler, it should be darker. So that was my big thing I did this week. But on the bonus episode, the hot topics we released last week,

we talked about a candy that is going out of business that they're going to stop producing in Canada. What is it? It's the cherry blossom candy, the chocolate cherry blossom. Oh, okay. That's like a 1900s or 1910. It's an 1800s candy, the chocolate cherry blossom. Oh, okay. That's like a 1900s or 1910. It's an 1800s.

Is it really? I think it's from like the 1870s. It's, man, it is something that- It's in a box. Well, so. Isn't it? Yeah. I know, I say that like it's bad, but it's shocking.

Have you ever had one? No. Me neither. Okay, yeah, that's fair. Maybe I should brush my teeth. But I saw them in the, I was like, I've seen them my whole life and I thought, oh, they look neither. Yeah, that's fair. Maybe I should. But I saw them in the, I was like, I've seen them my whole life and I thought, oh, they look nasty. They are, like the container is, well, you know what?

I've got a couple right here. Whoa. Oh, you actually got some. Yeah, the container is a box. It's the Cherry Blossom by Lowney. And if you look at it front on, doesn't it look like a no name brand? Yeah, oh, whoa, it does.

I always thought it was a no name brand. Yeah, because it's a yellow package with, well, the writing isn't black, but it's probably the same font. Yeah. Yeah. A sans serif thing. And the picture is the candy bisected and it is a chocolate cut in half

with a maraschino cherry, I'm guessing. And it just looks like a wound. And this pink ooze coming out of it. It's so gross looking. And I thought we could try them. Yeah. Because I've never had them. Graham, you're allergic.

I can't have. I can have one. I wonder why it's cherry blossom. Like, do you think it's a cherry blossom taste in there or just cherry? I think it's just cherry and it's blossoming with this pink, what did you call it? Vigo sauce. Vigo sauce?

Vigo sauce, yeah. From- Vigo slime. Ghostbusters 2. It also has a big sign on it that says, high in saturated fat and sugars from Health Canada. Graham, since you can't have that, I got you a big- Big turn! I got Graham a big turn.

Oh man, that's great. Dave, I'm so nice of you. Now, I'm just gonna cut mine in half, because I wanna- Can I have half, the other half of yours? Yeah, okay, let's just open one. Okay. And then- Wow. Okay, so you open it up and it comes in foil. Oh, really, it always comes in foil.

It's heavy, it's 45 grams. Wow, wow, well, 46 with gram in the room. That's right, thank you. Thank you. Now it's got peanuts in it, how far away from you do I need to cut this? No, you're fine, I think it'll be okay. Mm, fragrant.

Oh, it smells like... I think you're gonna have to saw it. And it smells, but this smells to me, it's very cheap chocolate smelling. It smells like... Mm, Big Jack, I remember it. What do you call it? That, like just Easter candy from...

Yeah. Okay. Okay, so you cut it in half and it do ooze. It does ooze just like the photo promises. But it does not have a beautiful cherry in the middle of it. No, yes it does. Does it?

Did I miss it? Oh, okay. But I cut it in half and the cherry was apparently on one side of it. Okay, yeah, you know what? It does actually look a lot like what the box promises. Yeah. But the box promises. Yeah. But the box does look disgusting.

The box looks disgusting. But, they're not lying. The way this is oozing out is very Ghostbusters 2. Yeah. Do you want the side that has the cherry in it or the side with no cherry? I'll take the other side, yeah. I feel like there's enough.

What are your thoughts on maraschino cherries in general? I'm a fan, because I like a Shirley Temple. Me too. That's what we talked about. I never liked them as a kid, but now I really like them. Oh, I Like to have a treat that's small. So a maraschino cherry would be nice. Yeah for that Well, also I didn't like when you get a box of chocolates and there's a Fruit in one of them. Yeah. Oh, yeah, that was kind of a rude surprise. Yeah

And also this child it's got peanuts in it or it's got walnuts or what kind of a rude surprise. Yeah. And also this chocolate's got peanuts in it or it's got walnuts or what kind of nut? I think peanut. It's got peanut like crust. Here's the ingredients. Sugars. Perfect. Number one.

Modified palm oil. Can't live without it. Modified palm kernel oil, modified milk ingredients. They're modifying everything here. Wonder how different this was than the like 1870s version of it. I bet you it's all those things that's just not modified. Were they getting palm oil back then?

Yeah, that's a good question, probably not. Unsweetened chocolate. Well, the good thing, the first ingredient is sugar. Sugars. Peanuts, coconut, maraschino cherries, salt. I never know how to pronounce this soy. Lecithin? Lecithin.

Oh, is it lecithin? I've been saying it wrong all these years. Oh, maybe I've been saying it wrong. What do you say? Lecithin? No, you're right. I know. Nice. I just said it more lectaphan? No, you're right. Yeah. Nice.

I just said it more confidently. That's true, but you're right. When you're right, you're right. What is that word? Oh, invertase, invertase? Invertase. Mm-hmm. Well, this has been,

this concludes the eating portion of the show. I love natural flavors. That's my favorite thing that a chocolate bar or a soda can boast. Well, you know that if they have, if they're like a crazy color, now the listeners are gonna correct me on this, but like if a soda is a crazy color and it says made with like no artificial coloring, it's usually a bug that they ground up to get like bright red. Hmm. Of course.

I think that's cool though, because at least it's natural. Yeah. When I was in... It's not vegetarian anymore. Yeah. This modified... Blue beetle. Yeah, this special sprite. You can't eat this on a vegetarian diet.

When I was in Europe over the summer, their M&Ms, they don't have certain dyes over there. So their M&Ms are all like kind of beige-y. Whoa. And they're not bright colors like they are in North America because they don't have whatever red number five or yellow whatever. So they're all kind of like brown and pasty. It's delicious. What is the red dye that everyone is like that's a red dye number five. Is that what everybody went on one of the two red liquid on my pants red dye three Red dye. Liquid on my pants. Red dye three, red dye 40, red dye three.

Red dye three, that's gotta be the one, right? But like, that's, what if we just came up with red dye four? Brilliant. Yeah. This one has, this candy has brilliant blue FCF in it and Allura red. Wow. What does?

I don't know where the blue is. What is the company that is withdrawing this out of Canada? Hershey. Hershey, okay. They're going to be taking it down. They're famous highway. Do you know, I only learned this by watching

a cooking show that there's a Hershey theme park. Oh, yeah. Called like, there's a Hershey theme park. Oh yeah. Called like, it's in Hershey, Pennsylvania and it's a theme park dedicated to Hershey chocolate. And it's, there's not a lot of stuff to grab onto. They've got a kiss mascot, Gene Simmons. Right. Do they have a fountain?

Like a chocolate fountain? Yeah. I got to assume, I got to assume like. Or just a brown water fountain. Yeah, I gotta assume I gotta assume like or just a brown water fountain This chocolate is gonna be gross. Yeah Ransom pretty quick. I mean you they you can get that you can get like chocolate fondue But I don't think you're supposed to do that for every day of your As a decoration of your theme flies everywhere. Yeah

as a decoration of your theme park. Just flies everywhere. Flies and bees as far as. Do they have rides? Yeah, they have rides. They have rides. They have, trying to think of another thing that's a Hershey's product. Well, we went to the M&M store.

Yeah. In New York City. In New York City, Graham and I. And we made fun of it every time we walked past and then we went and I loved it. It was the best. It was, all the employees were like singing and dancing. It was like four floors of M&Ms.

Seriously? Yeah. I bought an M&M spatula. You could buy like individual colors of M&Ms. They had all the M&M merch everywhere. It was different letters on M&Ms. Music's playing. The green one's flirting with you. Yeah.

Wow. Music's playing. It's like a party in there. And then across the street is the Hershey store and it also had Reese's stuff. And we went in there and an employee was crying. Wow. It was like the opposite vibe. Yeah, that M&M's store was really like,

like the scene in big where it goes to the big like, F.A.O. shorts. Like it's just like magical in there. That's cool. We played the giant piano at the M&M's. Anyway. M&M's rule. Yeah, M&M's are great.

These cherry blossoms, not the worst. Yeah. They were not as disgusting as I imagined as a child, but I think probably because the first ingredient is sugar. Yeah, it was a sweet balm The I just feel bad for whoever is that's their favorite Candy because that just happens where it's like the thing you've decided on this is what I like and then it just Vanished by whoever's favorite candy. This is probably shouldn't be eating it because they're a hundred years old. I Do got to say I like that it comes in its own box with one piece inside.

Well, that's when, yeah. That's, you know what, it's perfect for stockings. Oh, yeah. You know, imagine getting one of those in your stockings, no problems, right? No, it is. It's not bad, but I'm not gonna miss it. Yeah. I'm glad I just did that.

Yeah. I also got myself a big turkey. Oh nice. I got myself some chocolate bars. I have this one favorite chocolate bar, Denman Island, Simply Dark. Oh yeah, I should tell you about that. Yeah, we're talking about another day.

It's my favorite. It's the only one I'll have. So I just, if I can't get my hands on one of those, and you can only get it at one store in town, and I have to travel far to get them, so I get a lot at once and I pretend I buy them for work. What? Can I get the receipt for that?

Thanks. What store has them? Choices. Oh. But not the one on Camby. Right. Just the one on McDonald or the one on commercial. Yeah, the, pretending you're buying them.

Yeah, I was like, everyone at the, cause they comment on it. I'm like, everyone at the office loves them. What's that boss? Yeah, no, I got the candy. Yeah, I was like, everyone at the, cause they comment on it, I'm like everyone at the office loves the- What's that boss? Yeah, no, I got the candy. Buy another 10. Denman Dark? Simply Dark.

Simply Dark from Denman. And Denman Island. And from, and is it nothing in it, just plain chocolate? Just plain, but it's just the taste of it hits something in my brain where it just completely satisfies me. So I'm like, I'll just have nothing if I can't have that. Yeah.

I'll do like Mrs. Remfro's jalapeno salsa. That's another one where if I can't have that, I kind of won't have salsa. Really? On like for pouring on top of things, not for dipping for like chips, but for putting on things. Where do you find that? Same spot?

That one's easier to find. What do you pour it on top of? Everything. I put that stuff on everything. Wow. That's probably why I have stomach issues. It's pretty hot. Well, it's not hot. It's just-

And your stomach issues are probably why you have insomnia. Yeah. All these terrifying dreams. Yeah. Do you terrifying dreams. Yeah. Do you find, that was the thing I always heard when I was a kid, is like, oh, don't eat something right before bed. You'll have bad dreams.

That's, I mean, it's good sleep hygiene to not be eating something right before you go to bed. Yeah. I wish. Just hard boiled egg. Is that okay? I just pop it in the microwave with a piece of cheese on top. Is that okay?

It definitely does make them a little wackier for me. Sometimes depending on what I eat. Yeah, but even when like I used to do intermittent fasting and I'd stop eating at 8 p.m. And that did help, but it's so hard not to eat after 8 p.m. What was your window? It was like 12 to eight. So it was a pretty wide window.

Yeah. And it did help, but. Help what? My stomach. My stomach hurts so all the time, so. Yeah, it's, but yeah, like sometimes after like 10 o'clock, I want a bowl of cereal. Yeah, or someone's like a coffee with something in it,

not just plain. Yeah. A coffee? A coffee or a tea with something in it, not just plain. Yeah. A coffee? A coffee or a tea with like, you're not allowed to put, you can have coffee or tea, you can't put anything in it, you have to have it like plain, yeah. But you would have that at night? No, no, I'm sorry, in the morning,

because I wouldn't be able to eat or have anything until noon. Right. So before then, I would have to, I mean, it's not a big deal. It's such a privilege thing. Like, I wanna put something in my tea in the morning. I'm not letting myself eat food.

Yeah, I have it. I just don't want it yet. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I want it, but I've got a plan. Yeah. Is eight hours a typical window? I think eight hours is like the largest window or you can have.

Oh, okay. I think, I think I did it like the most time possible and then, cause I'm not looking to like, to like try to lose weight or anything like that. I was just trying to help myself. I have like a 16 hour window. I think that's a good window. Yeah, from like midnight.

Wake this? I don't eat from midnight to 6 a.m. It works, it works. That's healthy, yeah. Although sometimes I will wake up and then eat something and go back to sleep if I. Oh, that rules. It's nice, it's rules,

but it's probably the worst possible thing in the world for you. Yeah, cause then your stomach's like up. Yeah. Yeah. And your teeth are like, brush me again. Yeah. I wear a night guard, and so I would have to take that out. Oh yeah.

That's a big inhibitor. Yeah. And like sometimes I do kind of like stop myself from eating, just because I was like, well, I felt like brushing my teeth at nine o'clock and I'll put in a night guard and well, I'm done for the night. This is out of my hands now. It is kind of nice to have that as like a secondary stopper.

Yeah. Like I'm not going to do the whole thing just to have a bite of whatever. But those midnight snacks, man. If it's ready for you. I scrape my tongue. Do you guys scrape your tongues? Yeah. I love it.

It's so satisfying to drink water after scraping my tongue. I remember learning about it on the Rosie O'Donnell show. Whoa, you watched the Rosie O'Donnell show? Of course, we all watched the Rosie O'Donnell show. Was it called Rosie? Yeah. Who knows? The Rosie O'Donnell show.

Oh. And she would, it would have this animated intro, kind of like the nanny. Yeah. And it would say the name of the guest and she would do a little rhyme for kind of like the nanny. Yeah. And it would say the name of the guest and she would do a little rhyme for one of the guests on every episode.

She would change it up in every episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've got Christine Lottie and she's hot, hot, hottie. Whoa. For a while I found in a thrift store a Rosie O'Donnell show doll of Rosie O'Donnell. I gave it away, but I was like, wow, I never knew this existed. I would have had one years and years ago.

But she would, she, it was like a nighttime, do you know it at all? No, it was a night show? No, it was a daytime, but it looked like a daytime show. Yeah, it was, because they weren't really that kind of show with like a desk panel and then a band leader. That has a daytime show. Whoa, and this is daytime. Yeah. But I think like, does Kelly Clarkson have that or?

Oh, sure. I mean, but at the time all the talk shows were like walking around the audience with a microphone and saying like, what do you want to say? Wow, you should go to school, you piece of trash. Yeah. And she pretended she was in love with Tom Cruise every day. She called people cutie patooties.

Oh, okay. I remember. And she would shoot koosh balls into the audience. Wow. It was cool. It was like, and she was like, it was a vibe. It was a vibe. It was a vibe and it was like fun.

And the only kind of like controversy I remember is Tom Selleck went on and he loves guns. Mm-hmm, and she didn't want and she was like, hey Maybe people shouldn't have guns wrong Remember that big a big story and she was on it for years and And there was a big debate about whether Tom Selleck should have a mustache Yeah, yeah, And you know what? He looks good either way. Yeah. He's doing fine. Do you know why his wife liked him to have a mustache?

Why? It made her feel quickly down under. Yes. Yes. I told that before. You pulled it out perfectly though. Yeah. I really love that. You know what, I've only got about four jokes. But like Oprah, from that show, she spawned her own magazine. What? So like it was Rosie magazine. Yeah. I remember her appearing on a cover with her hand bandaged up and it said, staff infections are no joke. All right. I'm gonna go ahead and finish it up. And it said, staff infections are no joke. When I was 21, I got a staff infection on my knee

and I thought it was an STI. So I went to my doctor and I was like, is it herpes? He's like, on your kneecap? No. Were you sexually active? Yeah, I just started. My leg was. I just started, good for you. All right, how you sexually active? Yeah, I just started. I just started, good for you.

How you liking it? I'm just gonna Google Rosie O'Donnell. Wow, Rosie, I can't believe I missed this. Rosie O'Donnell-Mack, yeah. She was huge and then she went on to be the, kind of the anchor host of- The View. The View. Oh, okay.

And a lifelong Trump target. Yeah, Trump really hates her. But you know what? She was really funny and that show rocked for a long time. And she's alive still, right? Yeah. Yeah, that's great. Well, I mean, she got that staff affection cleaned up.

Yeah. If she hadn't though, yikes. Whoa, that's wild. I get a little unsettled with morning, like daytime TV shows and stuff, just like the, it's such a fake feeling vibe that I don't know, it unsettles something in my brain. And the fact that it's,

it used to be for like housewives. And now I don't know who it's for. People in waiting rooms. Yeah. It's like who has, you have- People in hospital beds. You can watch it anytime too, right? But you can watch anything anytime.

Yeah. So why would you watch the Blueberry Moore show? Yeah. That's a good point. I watched, I think it's just not for me. The way they smile, I'm like, you don't have to smile the whole time. Nobody's always smiling. Well, like the morning shows, I get those, because people have their TVs on in the morning,

getting ready for work and stuff. I think it's the aged probably are watching the Drew Barrymore show. Or maybe they need energy, because they don't have it in the morning, so they need to hear it to don't have it in the morning. So they need to like hear it to get activated maybe. That makes sense. Like having something to do in the morning

where it's like, well I watched this show. Yeah, a few years ago, Abby and I went to live with Ryan Seacrest and Kelly Ripa and it was awesome. Whoa. And everyone in the audience was obsessed. Like everyone in the audience was the biggest fan of the show. Yeah, it's fun. I watched like the bit of the New Year's Eve,

rockin' countdown or whatever. Rockin' New Year's Eve. And he's so good at that job. Yeah, he is really good at it. Have you seen him on Wheel of Fortune now that he's doing that? What? He's doing Wheel of Fortune? Yeah. Oh, that's nice.

Yeah. And it's him, still Vanna White of Fortune? Yeah. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. And then it's him, still Vanna White, and then occasionally Pat Sajak's daughter. Yeah. Whoa, what does she do? Nothing. At the end, she goes like, check us out online or something like that.

She's like the youth correspondent. Use hashtag wheel or whatever. Graham, have we talked about what's going on with you? Yeah, sorry. No, but very little. Very little, I must say. But I had a thing, this has happened to me three times now, where I watched a movie to the end,

and then found out- To completion? To completion, or so I think, where I watched a movie and then at the end, they're setting me up for a fucking sequel I did not sign up for. Oh. Well, you never signed up for a sequel. You'd have to buy tickets for no matter what. But I should have full movie with a ticket.

Yeah, I agree. I should have full movie that happened during- Wicked? Fast and Furious, Wicked was the most recent one. Across the Spider-Verse was another one. And there was another one that I- Yeah, there was another one. I know Mission Impossible was broken up into two as well. But there was that, yeah,... Yeah, there was another one. I know Mission Impossible is broken up into two as well.

Yeah, that was what I was thinking of. They didn't tell you going in. No, and I mean, that was the thing too with the Spider-Man one. I was like, they're just ramping up, motherfucker. It really pisses me off. And I've even, years ago, like 20 years ago, I saw Wicked and I forgot that there's a whole other story.

I mean, the Lord of the Rings ones, like any of the trilogy. I don't mind if I know that the movie is. Yeah, I guess so. But The Hobbit. And it's like a whole story. The Hobbit was only one book, and they broke that up into three. Yeah, that was so annoying. It should, that's a,

you didn't need to be more than one movie. But at least say like when they do like the Hunger Games Mockingjay part one. Yeah. They're like, this is the third Hunger Games part one. Yeah, at least they're being honest about it. Yeah, did you see Wiggin? I didn't, but I saw Craven and-

You did not. The Hunter? Yes. One of my favorite things like that's kind of like this is when movies that are crappy but assume that there will be another one, just set up the movie for another one that will never exist. Madam Webb did that too.

Madam Webb was extraordinary in that regard. All of those like Morbius, that whole like, like kind of like- This Sony Spider-Man universe. They're all like that where they keep building up to, like it's a bad movie and then it keeps building up for another movie that you'll never see again. I love that.

Oh, it's so funny. I mean, I'm giving them my money, but it is fun. I go with like a group. Yeah. To see those specific. Well, those are fun cause they're bad. Yeah. I saw Madam Webb in the theater in the vibrating chairs

with my daughter and I felt nauseous. I had to turn off my chair. That was probably my favorite of all of them. Yeah, Madame Webb was really- She comes out with the glasses. Beautiful. What was this one? Yeah. Just had the-

Wicked. Wicked. Oh, that's the one. Yeah. But another thing I noticed now you say it, I went and saw Conclave theater. Oh. Loved Conclave.

Yeah. And the trailers before were just like not Conclave adjacent, because one of them was for Craven. Oh, wild. And I was watching with Charlie DeMareza and he goes, I can't wait to hear about the Green Goblin mini series they're putting out. But it was just like, they couldn't have not connected

with the audience more than. That's wild. Did you like Conclave? Yeah. I loved it. It was good. But you know, I was thinking about Craven the whole time. I was gonna go see, I had tickets

cause they now do Cheap Tuesdays again, at least for January. And I was gonna go see the Brutalist last night. Oh yeah. But then my wrist was feeling good, so I played hockey instead. Nice. Oh nice.

But I went to buy tickets and it was like packed at the park. Really? It was like, the Brutalist was, there were no good seats left. You know, it's a 70 millimeter. Yeah. Wow. I don't know what that means.

Neither do I. And the last time I watched one 70 millimeter, I was like, I don't know. Yeah, same. Yeah. I forget what it was, but it was. Oppenheimer was the one I went to. Yeah, that's what it was.

And it was like, mostly people talking in offices and stuff. You got a lot of time for the money you paid. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. The Brutalist is like three and a half. It's got an intermission. Whoa. Oh, does it really?

Yeah. I like that because then you can pee. As long as you know going in, it's gonna be a long movie. Yeah. Oh man, I wonder if they play Craven the Hunter trailers. Oh, it's already kind of gone. Oh my gosh, no, it's gotta be.

It was like an hour and a half, and I think they were really like, sometimes you're like, oh, you're just padding this out to get to like 85 minutes. Yeah. But like that. The one that of course you see in front of every movie is the Red Hulk, Red Hulk and Friends.

Yeah. Oh, okay. I don't know anybody, honestly, I don't know anybody that's excited for that. I couldn't get me either. Yeah, they were like, now there's a Red Hulk. What's happening, what's the deal? Did the Hulk get his own movie

or was he the only of the Avengers? He was only in the Avengers. The Mark Ruffalo, yeah. And it was supposed to be Edward Norton, but apparently he was so annoying to work with that they were like, we're recasting you, Mark Ruffalo. Because they did an Eric Bana Hulk movie

and they did an Edward Norton Hulk movie. I remember Edward Nortons when he's having sex in it, he keeps checking his watch to make sure he doesn't like, his blood pressure doesn't make him Hulk out on this woman. She's probably just like, am I being bad? Like, why is he looking at his watch? So there we are, having sex, all of a sudden, guess who turns into the hall? He's spraying green goo everywhere. What am I supposed to do? He ruined my bedroom.

How was he? Incredible. Should we move on to some over-heards? Yeah. Hey everybody, I'm Jeremy. I'm Oscar. I'm Demetri. And we are the Eurovangelists. For a weekly podcast writing the word of the Eurovision Song Contest, the most important

music competition in the world. Maybe you already heard Glenn Weldon of NPR's pop culture happy hour talk up our coverage of this year's contest But what do we talk about in the offseason? The rest of Eurovision? Duh. There are nearly seven decades of pop music history to cover We've got thousands of amazing songs Inspiring competitors and so much drama to discuss and let me tell you the drama is juicy Plus all the gorillas and bread baking grandmas that make Eurovision so special check out out Euro Evangelists available everywhere you get podcasts and you could be a Euro Evangelist too. Ooh, I want to be one.

You already are. It's that easy. Oh, okay. Cool. The Greatest Generation has been going for more than eight years. And if you've been Greatest Gen Curious, but have never taken the leap, we recommend exploring your greatest gen curiosity in a safe, fun environment with partners you can trust. And right now is one of the best times ever to become a new listener. That's because we just started covering a new series, Star Trek Enterprise, one of the horniest and

weirdest editions of Star Trek ever released. This is your chance to ease into the greatest generation lifestyle. The Greatest Generation, now covering Star Trek Enterprise, the one with Scott Bakula, every Monday on MaximumFun.org or in your podcast app. Overheard. Overheard is a segment where we share. We bring and we share. We break bread together where we share, we bring and we share, we break bread together and we share things we've heard,

things have been said to us, things we've dreamt, things we've seen. We always like to start with a guess. Oh yeah, you can do a freaky dream if you want. Yeah, you can do a freaky dream? Oh, I don't wanna scare people. Okay. Okay.

I saw bone come out of the skin. Yeah. Oh, shit. Okay, so I was hanging out with my dad and we've been hanging out a lot together. So I think we went on vacation together. We went on vacation together, yeah. And I try to go and like hang out as much as I can handle.

And I- That wasn't necessary. It was like a Wendy Liebman. No. No. No. But he was like in the middle of the conversation, he's like, who's that guy? Dr. Argado? And then I went, Mr. Roboto.

And he went, yep. I was like, aw man, we're hanging out a lot. Paging Dr. Argado. Were you listening to the song? No, not at all. We were just in casual conversation. And he went, who's that guy? Dr. Roboto?

And I went, Mr. Roboto. And he went, yep. And just nooto. Yeah. And just no reaction. Yeah. I was writing a fan letter. Is it Domo Arigato, Dr. Arigato? Dr.

Arigato. Yeah. Where, what, that kind of sounds like an actual person. Yeah. Mr. Roboto? Thinking of Dr. what is the, the ice cream and coffee one? Africado? Oh, Afogato. Dr. Afog person. Yeah. Mr. Roboto. Thinking of Dr. What is the ice cream and coffee one?

Africado? Oh, Africado. Dr. Africado. Yeah. Well, I think we solved that mystery. Do you ever work at the coffee shop? Did anyone ever get anything like that? Was that on the menu?

Yeah, but people didn't get it very often, I think. Usually, because we sold drinks that in large sizes. And I feel like that dispelled a lot of those people. One shot of espresso in vanilla ice cream. Yeah, I mean that sounds good. Sour good. Yeah, the one that was like, I thought it was really candyish

was the caramel macchiato. Oh yeah. That to me was like, that's a dessert that you're having at 8 a.m. Yeah. And it's just a vanilla latte with caramel syrup on top. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The one, the Starbucks ones where they're in a plastic cup at 8 a.m. Yeah. And it's just vanilla latte with caramel syrup on top. The Starbucks ones where they're in a plastic cup and you can see that they've like, the

syrup is stuck to the sides. And it's on purpose. Yeah. When I worked at Dairy Queen, we had these things called Moo Lattes, which were basically like a Frappuccino and they were massive. And then if you wanted a bigger one, you had to order a Mega Moo. And people would say, can I have a Mega Moo? And I just remember thinking like,

this cannot be good for you. It's so much sugar already. And now you're gonna Mega Moo it. You're Mega Mooing this Moolatte? Yeah. It was in the, cause Tim Hortons had the ice cappuccino. Yeah.

And then I think the Moolatte came pretty soon after that. Ice cap, right? Ice cap, yeah. Yeah, because it's just, I haven't had one since probably the 90s. When did ice caps come to the day for you? Well, I get one a year. I like them.

Do you? They came in the early 2000s and I loved them. But they are a- So sweet. So sweet and also just like half cream. Like not even half milk. Just like a billion calories. Yeah.

Yeah. I think in a mega moo, you'd probably get like 1700 calories if not more. An omega moo was the, it was the sorority from Revenge of the Nerds. And if an alpha moo came in, woo. Shit. They, man, I love Dairy Queen. And if an alpha moo came in, whoo! Shit!

Man, I love Dairy Queen. I was thinking, I'm never gonna get a tattoo, but if I did, it would be just a cone, a soft serve. I find them so aesthetically pleasing. Yeah. A little swirl on top. Perfect, yeah. That's a really good tattoo. If you're only gonna get one. Why not?

I'm only gonna get one, but it's enormous across my entire back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just so detailed and shaded. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Dave, do you have a little bit of a word? Yeah, I was in Save On Foods, local grocery store, and I was in the, there like a an organic section in the back or in one corner of it there's one brand of rice and beans that they didn't have it but it's right next to the break room and they the music playing in the store was that MGMT song that goes boop boop boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop.

Oh, that's nice. And then I heard a voice from the break rooms say, MGMT? I thought they were too indie for the Save On Foods playlist. But I guess not, it's a pretty cool place. Yeah, I mean. Things have changed.

I feel so bad for employees of stores where there's music playing, because you are hearing the same. You're forced. Yeah, 25 songs over and over. It was weird though, because it was December and it was like, Christmas music, Christmas music,

MGMT, Christmas music, Christmas music. The boss was probably away. The Forbidden Playlist. Yeah. Yeah. Or it's their song. Yeah, this is my band. Putting the demo. I don't know if they're still peering, but it was a long time ago. Anyway, I love stores. I love going shopping in them. I love hearing music. They're the best. Oh yeah. I, mine also took place at a store.

Okay. And it's a shoppers drug mart, no, London drugs, sorry, London drugs. And it was at the self checkout and they have like kind of a command of you like scan it and then you have to put it in the bagging area right away. I hate that. I hate it too.

And there was a guy that was trying to scan something and it wouldn't scan. And so instead of like flagging help, he just went to the next one, it didn't scan. He went to another one, it didn't scan. And then he just put it in the to-go place and walked out the door. Yeah.

Like, I'm not buying this. Yeah, that's fair. Three strikes, you're out. Well, I do feel that way sometimes. I'm like, you installed these self-checkout things. They should be no trouble at all. Yeah. And I went, oh, there's a kiosk at a waterfront station

that sells magazines and all kinds of stuff. And I went to go buy- Lifesavers? They sell lifesavers? I think they probably have lifesavers. They got certs maybe? Oh, sure, sure, sure. With Retson.

Daily dose of retzin um And I wanted to buy a thing of m&m's that she pointed out a thing that says is the you have to buy three dollars or more And I was like what year is this that that's gone with the dinosaur having to pay a certain amount to use debit Like oh, yeah supposed to use cash. Yeah, it was weird the um The bakery up the street does that as well. Yeah? It's weird.

I guess they still, but can you get something for less than $3? I think of M&M's. It's less than $3. Yeah. That's good. But I didn't get it because I'm not playing their game, you see. I'm playing their head game. Now we have overheards from people all over the world. If you want to send one in,

you can send it to sby at maximumfun.org. And this first one comes with, this is Christine from Vancouver. Oh, it's not me. I promise it's not me. Whoa, my dad said, a-ra-bo-duh-ga-la-bo. I was flying to LA in March of 2020,

and there was a family in front of me on the plane. When we started to descend over the city, I heard various kids' voices exclaiming with the same level of excitement. I see palm trees. I see the Hollywood sign. I see a white truck. Oh wow.

Yeah, it could have been Ford Bronco. Yeah, that's very exciting. March of 2020, I was expecting it to be a COVID punchline. Yeah, maybe this was just a couple days before. Right before. They really misdirected me. Maybe they got stranded in LA and then they had to make it as an actor.

Yeah. That's Tom Hardy's, that's what happened with Tom Hardy. I meant Tom Spider-Man. Oh, Tom Spider-Man. He has a new brand of non-alcoholic beer called Biro. He does? Yeah. Really?

Wow, it's really happening, this non-alcoholic, it's on the scene. Hey, sometimes you just need to hold something at a party. Yeah, although I do think alcohol will come back. Oh, it's, they go to any bar, they're still full. Yeah. But it is a light, like we're selling way less alcohol at the Fox. I think-

There's venues across the country that we're talking about. In a few decades, they'll look back on people drinking alcohol, the way we look back on people smoking. Oh, you think? Yeah, because it's bad for you. And you do it anyways, like there's no positive to it except that it's's great. Yeah, it's the best. Yeah. Um, and then people there will be some kind of vape version of alcohol. Oh, yeah. Would you know what? I'd be fine with that. Remember when they had those boxes where you could smell air in them? Was that River Real?

Was that River Reel? Was that like a boxes? I remember there being like oxygen bars. Yeah. Where you would like get the things up your nose. They have one in Metro Town. They do? Oh sure. They did.

They did. This was in like the 2000s. Yeah. Palladium Rainforest Cafe era. Yeah. This next one comes from Phoebe from Bern, New York. How do you spell Bern? B-E-R-N-E. Oh. Have you ever heard of it? I've never heard of it. This next one comes from Phoebe from burn, New York. I'll burn. B E R N E.

Oh, have you ever heard of it? I've never heard of it. I've heard of burn, Switzerland. Oh, this is not that capital. I was at it at Mystic Seaport Museum in Boston during the summer. And as we're going in, a dad was giving a seven issue year old son a talking to about being on good behavior. He ended by saying, and we're on vacation, so today is a bad day to lose your privileges.

And his son responded with, well, maybe today is a bad day for you to be a parent. Oh, throwing it down, kid. You are not going to get to see what you want to see. Bad day to lose your privileges. Well, I'm at some stupid museum right now, so I don't really feel like there's a ton of privileges around. Is that true? Do kids just decide like today, I'm gonna make your life difficult?

No. All right. It just happens. They don't think ahead that much. They decide, it just, yeah. It's natural. What do you do though, if you're on vacation, you can't ground a kid on vacation.

Oh, did I tell you when I was in Disneyland? No. There was like a 10 year old boy, his mom was like, kind of like, they had gotten to some level where he was out of control and she like got right in his face and he slapped her. Oh my God. Oh my God. And then, and I was like, what do you do?

Yeah. Like. She slapped him back? No, but I, I, I might be remembering him wrong, remembering it wrong where she was like, do not do that again. And he did it again. No.

Like it was like, what you thought was way too much. He went even further. Jesus. And you're at Disneyland. If you're from out of town, you've spent thousands to get that here. Oh yeah. Like how are you going to ground them at Disneyland? Yeah.

Yeah. Go sit in the creepy- The Hall of Presidents. Yeah. The Haunted Mansion. Yeah. And don't come out until you've learned your lesson. This last one comes from Sam R. from Niagara.

I work at a post office and I heard a coworker talking to a man who was bringing in a letter that had been misdelivered. The man, I don't think this is me, coworker. Are you unit three? And the man says, I don't know who I am. I don't know who I am. Oh my God, you rock know. Oh my God.

You rocked me to my core. Yesterday, FedEx came and dropped something off at our house and knocked on the door and I was like looking out the window because the FedEx guy had walked away towards his truck and I didn't want to open my door and be like, thank you. I just wanted to get him to get in his truck and leave but I wasn't expecting anything from FedEx.

And I opened the door, got the package. It was for a different house. I was like, no, I should have. I should have talked to the FedEx guy. And the thing that sometimes happens in my building is there's somebody with the last name Graham. So anytime that I've seen a missed delivery, I get, oh, just for I Graham, not for Graham C.

Anyways, it's something that I struggle with with my crust there. Yeah. Yeah. And addition to overheards that are written and we also accept your phone calls. If you wanna call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one, ugh, Spypod one, like these people have.

Put some smoke on it. Yeah, that was nice. I had to get away from the microphone for a second, so I decided to raise my voice. Hello, Dave, Graham, and possible guests. This is Josh calling with an overheard from Sonora, California. So I work in a semi-corporate environment

and I heard two ladies talking and one of them is management. Manager says to her, hey, I need you to promote positivity today. And the other lady says, ah, shit. Anyway, no freaking blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, man.

Promote it. Promote it. Promote positivity. Hey guys, have you heard about this stuff? Yeah. It's like you put up a poster. Yeah, the thrift stores are haunted by hundreds and hundreds of shirts that are that kind of like, ask me about 5G or whatever, that kind of thing. And just having to wear one of those a day,

like ask me about, let me tell you about, it's just like, oh, it's gonna be so hard promoting positivity. But at least the shirts go on and have a good life and a lot of people wanna buy those. They don't stay there for years. Yeah, they get worn one day and then thrown away. So cool.

What is the guy who is charged for sexual misconduct? Which one? Headley was the name of the band? Oh yeah. Oh yeah, Jacob. Headley. Headley. Jacob something.

Yeah. Hoggard. Hoggard. At the thrift store one time I went and there was no less than 20 of those shirts. Like all identical, like somebody's like, we're dumping the whole load. Well, their biggest fans. Damn. I believe when we were recording our debut album, one of the days they were practicing

in the same place we were recording drums. Yeah, that's right. And I think the lead singer had a Hummer. Oh yeah, doing all right for himself, all those shirt sales. I drove a Hummer once. You did? It's too big of a car, but I felt very safe.

Although I went over the curb in front of a cop. But I was doing it for the cop. You were doing it for the cop? I was doing this like in front of a cop. But I was doing it for the cop. You were doing it for the cop? I was doing this like actor simulation thing, yeah. For the cop. Is this real? I told him I couldn't drive very well

and he was like, it's fine. What's an actor simulation for a cop? Oh, so they can like practice. Practice pulling you over? This was a long time ago, yeah. Practice pulling you over and like being- Abusive. Friendly.

Yeah. Promoting positivity. Shrinking face and empathy. Promoting positivity. Yeah. What a, oh wow. Well, here's your next phone call. Hi, Dave and Graham.

This is a long time listener calling in from Washington Heights in Northern Manhattan, New York. I was getting off the A train after dark a couple weeks ago and at the 181st Street station stop, this kind of bewildered, agitated looking gentleman in his mid to late 30s was kind of wailing around and shouting and seems generally worth avoiding. But as I was a few steps ahead of him, I heard him call out for help asking, which direction is 181st Street? And so I said, oh, just, you know, to your right down the street. And I was rewarded for my good deed by him shouting at me, God punish you. And I thought that was the best kind of classic New York City thing to have happen.

Rude, you were just trying to help out. Yeah, God punish you, man. You walked right into my trap. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're also giving the job to somebody else. Yeah. Punish me yourself then, if you care so much about it. A pox on me?

I'm not too worried about that. That is a very like old, it's a very like cherry blossom. Yeah. I hope he smites you. Why do you think that person's problem was? What the hell's going on? Mental illness. Mental illness, for sure. We're in drug addiction, yeah.

Yes, yes. Asked and answered. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. All right, here's your final phone call. Hi, Dave. Hi, Graham. Hi, possible guest. This is David in Chicago calling in with an overseen. So last night, I was sitting at the bar of a vegetarian restaurant that's been around for 20, 25 years. In that time they've created a lot of like medley witchy stuff and including a whole

bunch of like stickers behind the bar. One of which read, if you don't like human sacrifice, fuck you. Off I go. That's just where I stand on the issue. Well, fuck you. Oh, someone's too good for it. Someone's too sensitive. Oh man.

Three really great overheards. Yeah, that was great overheards. Yeah, that was a great one. Top nine in total. Yeah, that was good. Good round, guys. People don't realize, you're gonna get nine overheards when you listen to an episode of this show.

Yeah, which is a good deal. Sometimes the guest brings a second one and then you get 10. Then you get 10. Yeah, mine was like, it was an overheard, but it was a conversation. Those ones were like legit. It went in your ear, didn't it?

Studded in your head. Well, you're right, Graham. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Well, that brings us to the end of the podcast here. Christine, tell us things. You do a fantastic show with Aaron Reed called Helt Night.

Will we see it again in this year? Yes, it's back on March 7th, and then I think it's every two or three months or something like that. You gotta make it daily. Yeah. Oh, it's so tiring. It's so much fun, and it's a great wild show. It is incredibly wild.

It's the concept, we've talked about it before. It's my favorite concept of any show. Yeah. It is, no wait, my favorite concept is one where you bring your dogs. Nevermind. Yeah. That one is good. No, it's, you are Gorbmind. Yeah, that one is good. No, it's you are Gorbman, an alien,

and Aaron is your roommate, and every month something goes wrong where it becomes your responsibility, or his responsibility to entertain you. And so he invites standup comedians and you. I bring my own guests, which are like these like nightmare psychedelic little lotsies in between.

Yeah, yeah. Centibites. Yeah, yeah. We're thinking of doing like, we wanna do some, while we were watching the 1996 Royal Rumble the other day, and we're thinking about doing some sort of version of that, but within the Hell Knight universe.

Oh, that's fun. You know, these Greeks to come out and stuff. Who won? Who won that year? I don't remember, cause we watched a few. It might've been- I'm gonna guess Shawn Michaels. I don't even-

Is that too late? Do you remember? Cause I don't remember. 96? Yeah. Is there one every year or every four years? Like the Olympics. Well, they do one in the winter every two years

then one in the summer. Royal Rumble 1996, the ninth annual Royal Rumble. It was cool to see it grow over time. Oh yeah, no I like watching it. This was in Fresno, California. Attendance 9,600. And the results, is this the, I can't read this. You can't read that yet.

Who was eliminated, wait. There's a whole roster here that seems very confusing. I think you could Google who won. Shawn Michaels winner. There you go, wow, good word. Captain Loverboy or whatever his name is. What was it? The Heartbreak Kid or Sexy Boy was his theme song.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh wow, good call, nice work. And then Aaron's special just came out. Yeah. And I'm doing, I do a little improv bit in there. So you should definitely check that out. It's on Vimeo and Bandcamp if you want to pay for it.

But if you need to get it for free, it's on YouTube on YouTube easy access I don't recognize a lot of the names of these throw throw one up these 30 wrestlers Henry oh Godwin. I don't recognize that I think this year they had people some people from the WCW. Oh well or something. They like had brought in people from outside As their rosters. They needed more people. Yeah. So there's a few people.

Squad team one and squad team two. No. Sounds like me for you, but. Aldo Montoya. Oh gosh, I don't recognize him. Who was of course eliminated by Tatanka. Oh, well, Tatanka, everybody knows him. Barry Horowitz.

There was a few that were like- Barry Horowitz, I've heard of him, yeah. Well, he was eliminated talk to everybody. Yeah. Barry Horowitz. There was a few that were. Barry Horowitz I've heard of, yeah. Well, he was alluded by Owen Hart. The outfits were great. Yeah, no, the 90s era of wrestling is the best. Yeah, because there's like somebody dressed up and they're a cowboy in denim, you know, and a hat and then a belt.

Yeah. Which is wild, which is really cool to see. Well, thank you so much for being our guest. Thank you so much for having me. Thank you everybody out there for listening to the show. You know what? If you're looking for a comedy show, a weekly comedy show, Thursday nights at LMG, laugh gallery, you could do a lot worse is what I'll say.

Duke the dumpumpster Droz. And Duke, if you're out there listening, keep dumping those things. Come on back next week for another episode of Stop Bunk As of Yourself. Maximum Fun, a worker-owned network of artist-owned shows supported directly by you.