Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 922 - Savannah Erasmus

Episode Date: November 18, 2025

Comedian Savannah Erasmus joins us to talk gallery walls, the grocery store express lane, and the liquor shortage. Follow us: Instagram, Facebook, Bluesky. Join our Discord.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host. Stop podcasting yourself. Woo! Hello, everybody. Welcome to episode number 922. Stop podcasting yourself.

My name is Graham Clark. With me as always. He's a man. Who, well, let's see. He told me he's got nothing going on this week, but I don't believe in one bit, Mr. Dave Schumkin. Well, you know, I'm a mover and a shaker. Yes, yeah.

You're a Hollywood big shot. I am a deal maker. I'm sort of, I mean, all the studios are fighting over me. Yeah, and what is the project that they're fighting over? Oh, boy. Yeah, yeah, that's a really good one. It's sort of like a dream I had once about, like, yeah. I just can't, oh, you, oh, you, you, it was like, it's kind of David Lynch.

Yeah, I guess it's sort of Lynchian. And it's, yeah, you were, like, you were there, but it wasn't you. No, I know that feeling, yeah, yeah, yeah. And you were a little bit nude, but again, not you. And only a little. Sounds like a dream. It seems like a dream come true, really. Our guest for this podcast is a very first time guest, a comedian, you're in Vancouver, British,

Columbia, Canada. She runs a monthly show at the Fox cabaret in the projector room. It's Savannah Erasmus. Hello. Hello. Thanks for having me. Thanks for being here. This is great.

I'm a big fan. Well, back at you. Just a tape, though. Yeah, I understand that. Wow. So, throwing on smoke right away. So mean. I'm trying to have energy right now at 5.30 p.m.

You know? I know. This is our first time recording in the dark in I can't remember. Yeah. Like, we always would in like. Like, you know, around midday. Yeah. But you've got, you've got a real actual job that takes you, it's a classic, it's a nine to five.

I'm so sorry, yes, I do. What's your, what's your lunch break? What, you have an hour? Do you have half an hour? Yeah, it's, it's like, it's an hour. That's awesome. But 30 minutes unpaid, but I still take the full hour. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, how much, huh. Would I, would I want that half hour of lunch? So 30 minutes unpaid, but you could take a full hour. Yeah. So the, what if you just. took 30 minutes.

I thought I leave early. Oh, they're taking 30 minutes of pay regardless. Right, okay, okay, okay. I was trying to figure out, like, how do we game the system? You can't do it? Nope. Should we get to know us? Yep.

Get to know us. Savannah. Savannah. We take a picture with our guests. Oh, we have terrible lighting right now, especially because it's after dark. Yeah. We have no other options. Yes.

You described the lighting in here. This is straight lighting. Straight lighting. Straight man lighting. Straight man lighting. What characterizes straight man lighting? Okay. So I need the,

everyone needs to know that it is very bright overhead light. It's bright as, it's a fluorescent. Yeah, it's fluorescent. Corporate lighting. I don't know if it's fluorescent. Well,

it's reminiscent. It's fluorescent or reminiscent. And it's a light picture full of dead bugs. Yeah, it's just like, I've never looked up before. It does. Got a lot of dead bugs in it. Yes.

And it's overhead. And it's utilitarian. Like it gets the job done. This room is, we could see each other. That's what straight guys do. Straight guys are utility. They get the job done. But it's also like a cool.

It's almost cool. It's not warm enough. Like gay lighting or like what I hate the big light in my own house. Okay. It's always like lamp or like. Love a lamp. A warm. Lave a lamp.

We need one of those in here, actually. Yeah, that would be nice, actually. Yeah, that would be nice. You can turn that guy on. What is that guy? That's a lamp right there. That little gold. That gold guy.

This looks like a big thimble. It looks like a big thimble, yeah. It's my thimble lamp. Yeah, how do you... I don't know how to turn it on. I think it's probably on the wire, the wire there. It's also very dusty. Yeah.

But I want to see... Oh, that's nice. That's a bit warmer. This is doing... And then I'm just going to get up over here. I'm going to light this lamp. Okay, thank you. Yeah, my apartment, it's like, dimmer switch.

Like lamp, candle, it's just a lot of like warm, cozy lighting. Yeah, I'm a big chunk of my apartment is all. Oh, how about that? This looks like Halloween lighting. Yeah, yeah. This is spooky lighting. Thank you so much for accommodating my needs. I mean, the picture we took is still going to be the hearts of lighting.

Yeah, no, don't retake it. But what, is this better? Yes. Is this a better lighting? I like lamps too, but I don't like the, at the end of the night, the, like, extra. frankly, 45 minutes of going around and turning off each individual lamp. I have a lamp that, oh, we're going to get a, we're going to get a better lighting picture. I think this is going to, the phone's not going to like it.

No. Oh. No, the phone didn't like it. And you can tell because we were all silent for the three seconds that took to properly take the photo. Do you remember in the day, back of the day when phone? And you had to, like, remain perfectly still for a minute. And, like, you had to wait for a chunk of time to even see if it took. Yeah.

Oh, for sure. Like, when you, were people still using film cameras when you were a kid, or was it all digital all the way? No, still film cameras, yeah. And, like, so you'd have one picture of your whole summer. Like, it would be one picture, that's a picture of Savannah. Yeah. At the thing. Do you ever get pictures developed?

I do now. Or printer, I guess. I do now. Like, I, I'm trying to be, like, more, like, sentimental. Oh, that's nice. And, yeah, we're, our project right now, it's taking six years to do it, but we're trying to do a gallery wall at our apartment. Oh.

And so I've printed off so many photos, and my partner, I love him so much, but he's very, um... He's into straight lighting. Yeah, very into straight lighting. and, like, very much likes to talk through his decisions. So I don't know if we're ever going to get those gallery wall done. But it was a nice exercise to go through my photos, print meaningful ones. But the thing about a gallery wall with photos is you can just, like, if you like the frame. No.

Okay, sorry. We're doing it once that I've never, like, I'm just committing. Like, once it's up on the wall, it's up on the wall. We're not changing the photos. But like, as long as the gallery wall, as long as the frames fit, you're good. Yeah, but like I get the, like, and you also get used to looking at it. Exactly. And then all of a sudden, if you change one out for another, then it looks odd.

Yeah. How many pictures are we talking? I think there's like going to be like 40. Really? Like 40 plus. Like we're really going. I love that. Yeah.

Do you have 40 plus frames? Yes. Really? Yes. So you're, it's just him that's holding up the whole process. Well, no, it's like, yeah, I think it's him because, you know, I've laid out the photos. I'm just waiting for him to put him up. Do you do the thing where you're like?

Because he cares about the measurement and. and the square and all of that. I do not. You just want to throw them of the wall and he wants to like cut out every shape. Yep. Yeah. And so like, because I,

my apartment, we were told in no uncertain terms, you can't use any hooks. And so we'd use the like 3M strips. Uh-huh. Which, uh... You mean you can't go into the wall? Yeah. Oh, okay.

It's all like old kind of plaster and it kind of like cracks up or whatever. Yeah. Oh, boy. So we use those. strips and once in a while that thing's just going to fall on the wall like no matter what you do eventually especially in the summer they got hot and then things just start falling in well you know how like there's a thing about the way that batteries react to cool and heat and so

that's why your like smoke alarm will go off your battery you're like beeping warning will go off in the middle of the night oh because it like cools down i can't i guys i can't go into details. But have you ever had anything crash off the wall in the middle of the night? Yep. And it was like, and this is the thing too. And you wake up with like, you keep a baseball bat. This is next to your bet.

My wife and I in the middle of the night, say 2.30 in the morning, this thing falls off. Huge crash. Yep. We both just walk out and just, we don't grab anything or anything. We just walk into the hallway. So if there was a killer there, we just walked right into their trap. Yeah. Like, there was no, you know what I mean?

No, you know, they didn't even close the door or anything. It was just like, who the hell is it? I don't, I wouldn't mind being killed. Why? How? How is the more important? How do I want, how do I wouldn't mind being killed? Yeah.

Oh, boy. Electric chair. Electric chair. Someone comes and breaks into my house. Electric chair. Well, we have one. I have to go around at night turning off all the. Savannah, same question to you.

I would hate to, like, choke on like, something that I'm eating because I would just be like dead and like just thinking about how like the food wronged me. Yeah. Yeah. And also it's a little bit embarrassing. It is embarrassing. And like you can't see you you you need someone's help and you don't ask for help. Yeah. Yeah. And you would you mind unchoking me? There was. I went through a time. So I have anxiety. So I went through an era of my life where I would like rewatch the same video of how to like use a chair to save yourself from choking because I, like, was living alone, and I was, like, so scared that I was going to, like, choke to death in my apartment.

So it's kind of my energy. I'm, like, that's, I'm really scared of dying, choking to death. I watch this video all the time of a guy who sells a blanket that puts out all sorts of fires. You just throw the blanket on it? Do you see those? I asked for that for Christmas. Did you?

Yeah. I mean, that blanket, it looks. The fire blanket. Yeah, the fire blanket. Yeah. And, like, the guy in it is, he calls everybody. who doesn't have one a penny pincher and, you know, shows how fast, like a dog knocks over a barbecue and the whole back here it goes up. That's going to be a big blanket to do a barbecue.

Yeah, it is. It's, right? Yeah, it's like big. It's like something you mount to the wall, right? So that you could like pull it out and throw it on the fire. And you keep it in the kitchen? Yeah, in the ad he does, right? Yeah, in the ad, I think it does.

And then, but he, there was like, maybe it's the same guy, I don't know, but on TikTok, there was like many people. would just put it, like, underneath their, like, barbecue outside. Oh, okay. I've had a few barbecue fires. You have? Well, yeah, it's usually, it's not the barbecue itself. It's like, sometimes you need to use a, like, for certain setups, you'll use a tinfoil. And if the tinfoil, if there's, like, grease on the tinfoil, that the tinfoil will catch fire.

Yeah. And then you just turn off the barbecue and wait for it to burn out. Yeah. Okay, so you have a survival instinct. You're calm. Your calm, cool, collected. Yeah, no, I, yeah. You know what to do in an emergency.

I mean, it's, I, I mean, I assume that that's the right thing to do. I, like, years and years ago, I was in a hotel where the fire alarm went off for real, like, not as a test or whatever. And it was just awful. Like, every, you had to walk downstairs and everybody's in the middle of the pajamas. Yeah, in the middle of the night. And it also had the one for people who can't hear. So it's like the strobe light is going off So you feel like you're in a nightmare

Does it go Was the strobe light in your room? Yeah It's in every room so that like For somebody that wouldn't be able to hear And it would wake you up Like there's no way you would sleep through it Uh huh

But then everybody was kind of like You could tell it People brought along things You could tell them Yeah they like brought some stuff You do not Yeah do not stop and get your walkman Well I need my walkman

Savannah where are you from? Um, I'm from Alberta. I'm from Kikina Métis settlement. It's like northern. It's very rural, northeastern. What's the closest town? Uh, four McMurray. Four McMurray.

Okay. But that's why I feel a deep kinship with you. It's because you're from Alberta. I'm from Alberta, yes. And I played a show. Have you ever played a show in Fort McMurray? No. Ooh.

No. They would not like me there. Yeah, they didn't like me either. Really? Yeah. But they, uh, the accent of the night. was, let's get this guy drunk. Did you get you drunk?

Yeah. Oh, okay. There's a lot of Newfoundland guys. Yeah, they're apparently. Like, everybody's got lots of cash. So, yeah. Yeah, they were sending up shots. And then after the show, everybody wanted to drink.

Like, the show didn't go at all. But, like, everybody there would seem to like just having me around. That's, yeah, okay. Yeah. Have you read Ducks by Kate Beaton? Yes. Yeah. It's a graphic novel about Fort McMurray.

And there's a lot of maritimeers out there. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And it's, so where you're from is, it's close to former McMurray. It's a small town? It's like a hamlet. It's like a thousand people in the community. And then like the closest town is Lacklibish, which is, yeah, you probably drove through it.

Yeah. Or stop for gas there. And then that's like the town of like 10,000. So you know everybody in that hamlet of yours. I'd like to think so. Maybe not anymore. I haven't lived there for a lot of time. You stop it for gas and lack of limbollah.

Bish, is there, is there gas in your town? There's a single or general store. You can gas up there. But people, no, no, it's not. Now, this general store, are we talking someplace that you could rent DVDs? They used to do that, but then they stopped because, like, nobody would, like, return the DVDs. They were, like, I remember these beings that there was signs where they had, like, a board of shame of, like, trying to guilt the people to bring back the DVDs. DVD, but the last time I visited, there was no DVD rental.

Okay, that's, yeah. Like, food and, you know. Yeah, yeah. Gas. Gas, cigarettes. Cigarettes, yeah. I just love the idea of a place being like the last place you can get gas. Oh, yeah.

Like, always in a horror movie. That's where the guy says, like, well, you know, the last people went up that. I guess that's the cabin of the. Kevin in the woods. Yeah. The cabin of the woods. There's, it happens a lot in horror movies. And it's just like, especially once from the 70s and 80s, there's always somebody, it's your last warning before things are about to go absolutely apeship.

Yes. Did you, do you like horror movies at all? I actually hate to be afraid. No, be afraid. I don't like it. Yeah. And I watched sinners in theaters, but only weeks after it came out and I was able to read like every single review and like every like plot like summary. So I knew exactly what to expect.

That's what Sally does. Is that your wife? Yeah. Yeah. And, yeah, she has the exact same thing, so. And I went, like, the first week or, like, but on a week day. During the day. During the day.

Because I can't see a scary movie at night. Too scary. Yeah. And then I, but I, and I was kind of hoping it would be more full. I was like, this is the biggest movie. Wait, were you alone? Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's scary.

But just like, I like the sensation of being in a theater where people, like, everyone's, scared at the same time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, it wasn't very full, and there were no jumps. Yeah, this weekend, we sat down to watch a movie, and then, like, the first 20 minutes, we're like, this seems really familiar. And then just as the plot went on, and it was only at the end that we were like, we've seen this. We saw, we've watched this for a whole second time.

This is like, we know how this ends. Yeah. Was it a horror movie? It was a horror movie. What percentage of the movies you watch? or horror movies. These days, I would say, somewhere in the 70, 75% realm. Oh.

And then, you know, sometimes we'll watch a show. Sometimes we'll watch. Is it like horror or is it like thriller, psychological? Thriller, horror, kind of anything in that column. And then... You ever watch the thriller music video? That's sort of a horror. That's too scary.

Dave, you know that's too scary. It was my first big scare. Remember when people would do flash mobs of that? Oh, yeah. Yeah, what an amazing time in our personal history. In our collective history? Yes. Well, I mean, was it people or was it?

Actors. Hired actors. That came out wrong. Is it people who had free time or was it Filipino prisoners? Oh, yeah, that's true. There was the prisoners, yeah. Which, as punishment goes, pretty lax. That was your punishment was to do a flash mob.

Did you ever, did you know anybody that was a part of a flash mob? No. But I remember it being, like, people would talk about, like, how they wanted, like, flash mob, like, proposal. Yes. That was a scary, scary time. Yeah. I did not like that. What, if your current partner, if that happened, would you just walk away?

I would move to a different country. There's like... He hates me and he, like, wants me to have a panic attack. What song would you absolutely not want him to do? Oh, man, that's a good question. This is a really good question. Because it's always some light. I mean, the classic one is Bruno Mars.

I think I want to marry you. I know, but embarrassing. Of course. But like... I think I don't want to miss a thing. I would be. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

But like, could they do, like, do hossed by wrong steed? They can do anything. It's a, what's, yeah. Were somebody to propose to you, what song would be? A no. Well, actually, a song that would be a, Yes, that'd be really funny, would be, like, come clean by, like, Hillary Duff or something. Nice.

Like, if you're going to do. Yeah. Yeah, you know the culture. The theme from the O.C. No, from Laguna Beach. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, is a past guest, Amanda Brooke Parenthood's brother proposed in a food cart flashmo?

I feel like it was. See, it's a horror story. See, this is a horror story. This is none of our business. but also the fact that we can't remember. Let's name drop and then talk badly about how much we don't want that for ourselves. But it was like a, he's an a cappella fella. Yeah, there was something involving that.

Okay, well maybe, maybe she loved it. Oh, yeah, sure. If you're into it, if you're, I felt like it was this. So many degrees of separation away. Anyways, I wanted to go back to the horror question. Yes, you're there. Because I recently finished the lowdown on FX. Okay.

Well, remind me what that is. It's Sterling Hard Joe. Do you know who Sterling Hard Joe is? He did Reservation Dogs on FX. So it's like his new project. And it's like a noir. So to me, it's like really scary because it's like really like graphic violence. But it was an amazing show.

I think it's like eight episodes, like an hour and episode. And it's just talking about like the corruption and, like, crime in Tulsa and how it's related to like the ongoing land theft from like the indigenous peoples. And it was just the writing was so good. And then like even the scary parts, like I did have to like Google and like see what was going to happen in the episode. But because I was prepared, I was able to overlook all the violence. But it was still like cool. And it was like, yeah, the style of, you know, noir and like cop drama. But then it was like, oh, you don't know until the end that this is actually about like.

Oh. Okay. It's one of the... Because it's just like a... Is it like black mirror? Is it that kind of thing? No, it's like Ethan Hawke, who's like the main character. He's like a truth story in.

That's how I know the name. Yes. Yeah. So it... Amazing reviews. Amazing show. And then you don't even really know what the story is about until the very last like 30 minutes of the episode.

I love that. Because you're just following like Ethan Hawk who is trying to like figure out... He's so cool. Yeah. He's so cool. He's so cool. He's so cool. He's such a good actor.

And, um... he's just like a journalist in the small town community just trying to find the truth of like this something that happened. And this is good. And it's really good. You recommend. I recommend. I think everybody should watch it. Okay. Because also I love Journal Hard Joe. So. What was it called again?

The lowdown. The lowdown. On FX, which is on Disney Plus. Yeah. Let's say, you know what? We don't plug Disney enough on this show. Oh shit. Propose at Disneyland. I think this. Oh my God. Propose at Disneyland. Get Prince Eric to be your wingman. Yeah. I actually. used to, like, talk so much shit about, like, Disneyland and, like, Disney adults and stuff.

And then, um, I went to Disneyland and I met Chewy and I almost started to cry. Chewy Bacca? Yeah, Chewbacca. And then I almost started to cry and I was like, I get it now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But Disney proposal, scary.

Yeah. Horror story. No, no, no, no. But like, I, yeah. Star Warsland, though, is pretty awesome. Yeah, sure. I went and I cried when I met Peter Pan. You were really digging deep there.

I couldn't think of any. I could see. I could see the. Who would be a weird guy to cry at? The rabbit from Alice in Wonderland. Oh, yeah. It's a minor character. Late for a very important date to marry you.

Yeah, I like all this. When did you go to Disneyland? Last Christmas. And did you, were you looking forward to it? No, I was kind of just, because, like, my partner's family, like, they go to Disneyland because it's, like, a fun thing to do. Are they all Disney adults? No. They just like.

It's like their thing they do. It's, yeah, it's kind of, like, did they have matching T-shirts? No. Okay. That's a big thing. That is a big thing. Like, families will all, like, yeah. Yeah, and everyone was wearing, like, the mini mouse ears.

But, no, Steph, like my sister-in-law, she just wanted to take me because she thought I love it. And did you? And I did. You buried your face in Chubacca's chest. I was really, like, I was like, wow, I am really embarrassed right now. Is Chubaca, like, in Star, we walked through Star Warsland when we went a few years ago. Okay. But I, the kids didn't care, and I didn't care about any of it.

Yeah. But Abby later went back. But is Star Wars Land, because in all the other places, like, you know, there's Mickey walking around being jolly and, like, he'll hug. Like a kid or whatever. But Star Wars Land, are they're like, uh, lots of stormtroopers? Stormtroopers like, and they're not giving out hugs. No. And like you, I've seen videos where they react to a kid using the force.

Uh-huh. And, uh, yeah, Vader comes out sometimes. Did you see Vader while you're there? I did not. I did not. Um, was Chubaka just hanging out or was, did he with a Han Solo? It was 8.30 in the morning and he was just walking through the little. An ice coffee. Yeah, exactly.

And then, um, He was just walking by, and then, yeah, he was taking pictures with people, and then, oh, sorry. And, yeah, he's just like, I don't know, doing his brown. He's taking pictures of people? Like, he's taking pictures with people. Yeah, but, like, posing, like, like, they would, hey, Truvah, come here? Yeah. Oh, wow, first thing in the morning.

Yeah. And then I would, yeah. Did he make the noise? He did. Yes. And he's, like, very tall. Like, the actor in the costume is, yeah, I don't know. I went to university.

with a... With Jabaka? A baca. I went with Lobaka. We were on the same intramural Ultimate team. No, I went with a woman who was a

character and she was, she had worked at like Disneyland, I don't know, Tokyo. And she had been Ariel and maybe Bell. No, it couldn't be Bell. Her eyes were so blue. who bells of brown eye. Yeah.

I made sure contacts. No, she was another lady, one of the ladies. But, uh, the gang. Yeah. And I was like, I was so surprised. Like, why did you leave there to go to college? Yeah.

I do like hearing about all the weird, not weird, but all the like protocols at Disneyland, like to stop. If somebody's drunk, like there's, there's an emergency kind of thing. Oh, yeah, we, we, there's like names for all the, the codes. Yeah. We got a goofy on aisle three. But there's also this club that's in Disneyland that's like a bar, and you have to be a member to go there. Oh, yes.

And the line up to get a membership is three years long, three or four years long. That's not that long. That's true. Maybe I'm thinking maybe it's more than that, but it's, we can never go. We can never go. We can never. No. No.

Does that bum me out that you'll never be able to go? No, I think I'm good with my one good experience of Disneyland. I don't need to go back. Are you going to go back, though, because of this family pressure? I don't know. I would like to go to, like, Universal Studios to meet, like, Toad. So it's Club 33. Club 33, yes, the members-only club.

Isn't it, like, really expensive to join to? I'm sure that... I don't know, this Disney Park subreddit is giving me... These people are all writing paragraphs. They're writing novels. Yeah, I just want to... Oh, the waiting list is five years. That's all I want to say.

Oh, it's like a nexus card. Yeah, something like that. Yeah, you want to meet Toad? I do want to meet Toad. But not Mr. Toad from Disneyland. I don't know. He's got a wild ride. Mr. Toad's wild ride?

Is that still around? Famous Disney ride? One of the big rides? The jumbo ride, the teacup ride. Do you go on the teacep ride? No? Did you see the T-Cub? go right no these are old where do they still have them yeah the teacup they must have did you do uh splash

mountain no did you do space mountain he is that the one you you're dropped i guess i don't know they're all isn't that the hell elevator or something they're all you dropped in a lot of them yeah yeah yeah it's not unusual to be dropped yeah yeah um uh yeah i was the last time i was a kid so there's nothing that i remember there is probably still there there was a hold do you care about Star Wars? No. Okay. Okay. I was going to say, just go back for the Star Wars. But if you don't cared. No, I did when I was a kid. Just like a lot of kids care about Star Wars and then they started making other things and I was like, well, I'm good with the original three. I really liked, like, I, that was, because I don't do any kind

of, um, fandom. Fandom? Yeah, sci-fi. So Star Wars was the only one that I was kind of in on and I was like, and then they kept making movies. And now I'm, I no longer have, seen it all. Yeah. Yeah. And certainly no TV shows. No. Well, it was the Mandelurian.

That was the one everybody's losing their mind for. Yeah. Do you care about Pedro Pascal? Do I care about him? I mean, I don't want to watch any of his stuff, but I really care about him. I'm like, I want him to be happy. You're such an empathetic person.

Yeah. Do you care about Pedro Pascal? Yeah, I do. Deeply. Is he? Oh, answer me this. Is he a daddy? Yes.

Only because he called it, he said it himself. Oh, okay. Like, on. TV. Okay. And he, so as you're caring about him, extended to watching the Fantastic Four movie? No. Okay.

So it's not that deal. No. No. I just supported from afar. I've never watched Mandalorian or any of his project. The one thing I did watch was, um, what is it called? Materialists. Yeah, I know.

Of course, it's a terrible movie as well. So. I haven't seen it, but. No. It's bad. Skip it. Yeah. Maybe I'll read the synopsis and see if I like it.

Yeah. I'll go back and watch. Yeah, exactly. Read the synopsis and see if it's too. scary. There's a scary part. Is there? Yeah.

And can I spoil it for you? Yeah. Okay. So the listeners, fast forward. We're going to spoil the scary part of the material starring Dick Cota Johnson and Pedro. Pedro and Chris Evans. Yes.

Yeah. I didn't like the movie because it's like, it's supposed to be like a rom-com, but there's no comedy in it. And like the jump scare of the movie is like Pedro Pascal, you learn that he did this leg lengthening surgery to give him like three inches of height so that he'd be over six feet so that women would love him. But it's like done so seriously that it's like, this is, where are we? Who wrote this movie?

This can be so funny and can't be, but it's just serious. Is the actual jump scare like something? Like you just see like the scars on his legs. Oh, okay. Oh, that. Yeah, exactly. I should call that movie Scarlegs. It's the procedure.

lengthening procedure. Yeah. Do you guys think it's worth it? For three inches. Three little inches. No. Because you have to relearn how to walk.

They have to relearn how to walk. It's years of pain. Of pain. Yeah. And. Oh, put the payoff. Like, that's why I'm like, it was the movie, like, an ad for this leg lengthening surgery and, like, the sling song is being paid by this company to, like, promote this, like.

Because it's not. treated it as a bad thing in the movie. No. It's just like, oh, he did it to get ahead. And then look, he's dating Dakota Johnson because she loved him because he's tall and rich. And she's Madame Webb. Did you see, like, so if you get the leg lengthening surgery on paper, you are on the apps, you could be like, I'm six feet. Ladies come and get me. But I walk really weird. Yeah. Like, are you able to like play sports? Probably not. Like, it feels like you would get the... You could probably play like a ping pong. Okay. Like a foosball.

Yeah. A pool. Yeah. But like it feels like the sports where like being tall is an advantage. You could then... Could you dunk? Is that you're saying? But like you can't then be mobile enough to...

No. I think also probably the bone that rose is probably pretty weak. It's like I feel like... Or is it stronger than ever? It's like the one strong part. You can kick a battery where, but not that spot. Uh-huh. Um, where do they do that?

Because I know Turkey is like, that's the place for hair. Yeah, we're hair. I actually don't know. I actually would love to do, uh, like a, a travel TV show where I go from place to place getting my hair done, getting a Brazilian lift. Yep. Yep. What's your take on people getting, uh, men more so than women getting plugs?

Um, I love gender affirming care for all people. So if you want to get your hair plugs. Do it. Okay. Yeah, to be happy. Do you feel like if somebody does get hair plugs, do they have an obligation to disclose that they have hair plugs? No. No.

No. Just have hair and be confident and don't be an asshole. And then I think everything is fine. Okay. No deal. No deal. Yeah, that's a pretty. I think the real problem is like when someone lose all their hair, then they like feel badly

about themselves and they projected onto other people or make other people feel bad because they themselves are sad inside. That's true. That's actually a worst outcome. Yeah. Yeah, that's Luke's Luther. He was bald and he was a monster. Exactly.

Daddy Warbox. Yeah, a monster. Do you think, I was thinking about, like, because I watched this Instagram video about how every celebrity kind of has the same hairline now. Yes. Okay. Because they all get the same procedure and there's like an ideal hairline. But do you think Jack Nicholson's reps would have pressured him into getting? That's a really good question.

And, like, because what makes him not attractive, but, like, iconic, I guess, is his, memorable. His face and the hairline. Yeah. Like, the, he's not like, he's just very, like. He's got Riz. I'll say it. Wait, Graham, I think I taught you what Riz meant. Yes.

Yes. Yeah. Oh, my God. That's my credit. And, you know what? First time I guess, but that's my credit. Yeah. If you think there's other words that I should know, please do not hesitate.

Is there a word I should know? That's all I got. Just like when you're on your break at work, just think of what words you could introduce to me. Okay, great. I would appreciate it. I'll send you a little. What's the, like. But wait.

Wait. It's, we're older generations as interested in youth slang as they are today. Probably not. Like, I feel like it's a big thing of like, you know, 40-somethings. You know what teenagers are talking about. Yeah. Well, I didn't know about 6-7 until the dictionary word of the year thing happened. I was like, what does it mean?

It doesn't mean anything. That's what I thought. Yeah. Just the nonsense. I got a word of the year calendar. I learned one word a year. And this was this year. This was this year.

So 6-7. So you're done. You're done. Yeah. There's a hand gesture you do with it, too. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Like a chop hand?

No, it's like, uh, a scooping, some kind of scooping, you're scooping, six, sevens. Yeah. Yeah. I, like, so like teenagers as a group. As a species. As a species, we're really around until like the 50s. Like, nobody thought about.

Yeah, kids didn't exist until like the 50s. And then, yeah. Like, there was just this time, like, you would be a kid and then you would be a teen and that's when you go to work. No, you start working at like 12. Yeah. And then you're an adult. Yeah, you're married at 14.

Yeah. And then. Do you have your driver's license? I do. Did you get what? Did you get it very young? I know in Alberta. You can get a very young.

No, I didn't. I got it when I was like 25. Okay. Here in town? Yeah. It strikes me that this would be a difficult town to get driver's license. But maybe not. Maybe because it's more challenging, it's more because Alberta was so easy.

Yeah, no, I wish I got it when I was younger because there was one stoplight in my town. And then when I, in like 20. You blew through it. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. In like 2019, it was a really big deal that we got a second stoplights. And now there's two stoplights in our town. And I'm like, why? why was I so anxious that I didn't get my license until I was 25 and had to do the whole thing here.

Yeah. Yeah. And the thing is like you don't actually have to know how to parallel park because everywhere in Calgary, there's parking everywhere. Yeah, exactly. Except you when you go to town, but I'm not going to take you downtown. Yeah. Yeah, don't have to parallel park. You just like pull in.

That's a parking job. I can't park. Me neither. I'm really well aware. I cannot park. Wow. It's not me. I like, I'll use an Evo because they've got a backup camera.

Love the backup. Well, everywhere, I mean, your car is just old enough that they're not standard. No, yeah. Every car now has them. I know, and I love it. I love being of the, like, you know, when it beeps, I love it. It makes me feel a little bit. When it beeps a little bit.

Then when it beats really like. Yeah, yeah, yeah, push it through the yellow zone a little bit. But, yeah, my car doesn't have it. So it's still old school parking for me. I don't have a car. I just used Ebo. Yeah. What's your, uh...

Does Sally have her license for me? a young age or get it late? No, she got it late. And she loves driving. She absolutely loves it. So it works out well for me because I don't have to drive. And I'm not a horrible driver, but I'm certainly not. And you're drunk a lot. Yeah, I'm drunk most of the time. Well, you know, Bertie, you take the test drunk. Mm-hmm. Yeah. You're going to need to know how to do this. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, you know. I just imagine you driving and you're doing bits to yourself and, like, not paying attention to the road. Like, that's my impression of you. Oh, yeah.

You're cracking yourself up. Yeah, laughing at your own jokes. Hey, what's the deal with the green lights, all right? Hey, what's the deal with that guy giving me the finger? Have you ever been in an Evo that was disgusting when you got in? For the people outside of Vancouver, Evo's are a car share where you just go pick them up off the street. And people, it's a treat them like garbage.

Yes, they do. And the drivers are, like, notoriously terrible. Yeah, like, really people that don't have a car and shouldn't be driving. Yeah. I drove behind one for 10 minutes the other day, and it, in the dark, and it did not have its lights on. Wait, was that me? Yeah, it's just, they always make you rate the cleanliness, and it's never. I always say bad.

Yeah. Because they always stink. They always stink, and there's like some. What do they stink? go it's like okay right now because it's fall it's like rotting leaves but then you know how you like step in dog poop because it's covered in leaves because the same colors the leaves yes but i've been in like so many evos lately where it smells like dog poop in the car that's one of the worst like it has to be because the leaves are covering right yeah like people aren't doing this on purpose

people aren't are they are they is it dog or is it human because or are we dancer if you wanted to take a dump in a car They can't trace it back to you. You could have said, it was there when I got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's plausible deniability. So what the message is, if you need a toilet and you can't find one, Evo is always there for you. This is sponsored by Evo.

Are you any, were you ever a member of Evo? I'm currently a member of Evo. Oh, okay. But. Your own car and an Evo. I know. Look at me. It's good.

The thing that's good about the Evo is, is you can park it wherever you want. You don't, like, have to find a legal spot or pay for parking. You just drop it wherever you want and then pick up one, hopefully, sometime later. I used to do car to go, which were, they were all smart cars. Yeah. And there was like a mad rush at like 449 or 459 to like log in because everyone would take them on the way home. Oh, yeah, downtown would just empty out. Yeah.

Yeah, I remember. I've never driven one of those tiny little cars. Oh, they were fun. You ever drive one? No, but I've ridden in one. What's it feel like? Just like you're going to die immediately because you're so close to the other cars. No protection at all.

Yeah, no bumper to deal with it. Yeah, no, it's not safe. Do they even make smart cars? No, they actually stopped making them. There was one on my street that had been there probably since I moved in. So it's probably been, well, it was four years because somebody, from the city called and bothered about it. I don't know who.

It could have been anybody, really. Wasn't you? Wasn't you? No way. It was in the Evo at the time. But it was, it had molded. Like it had just like moss had taken it over. Oh my God.

That's so funny. Yeah. It was like an art installation. It was like, let's just let this thing decay through the seasons. A sculpture. A sculpture. Yeah. And then finally it got, the tires were flat.

All of the thing was, it's so grungy. I used to work for a TV show that was about cars. Like they would just, it was a car review TV show. Okay. And it was. Which would now just be a YouTube channel. Yeah. And but there was, one of the segments we did was a, like, it would mostly be people would, like,

there's car journalists would review cars. And I was an editor. And one of the segments we did was these two people were like, we're going to see if you can fit more furniture in a smart car. or a Humvee or like a Hummer And This is the golden age of TV Wow They had budget

And they went to IKEA And they bought a bunch of flat pack furniture And fitted in the smart car And then they bought a bunch of like pre-assembled furniture And put it in the Hummer and like oh we got more into the smart car Well no shit

Because it's not fair And all the comments on the, like we posted it on YouTube, all the comments were like, this sucks. And this is why we only get eight episode series now. I mean, yeah. Because of your show. Because of the new driver's seat. Check it out on, boy, what even broadcast that show.

There's a- Like Discovery Channel Plus. It was on, no, it was on like the cable, like the local, like, community access. There's a channel. if you're ever out in Ontario. Okay. You have to be in a hotel room or something. Or somebody that has cable.

There's a channel called CHCH. And it's like time has never existed. They're still showing shows that like they've, I watched old comedy at Club 54 at or shows. Have you ever seen that show? No. Oh, that was the glory days of stand up where they, uh, anybody could get on TV for a while there.

Damn. But you can't, I would love to see it. I would love to see more of that show. show but I can't find it anywhere there's no and I mean this is like well people I said that it looked like it was taking place in the 90s but it actually was filmed in the 2000s but everybody in there Burlington but it was Canadian TV so the quality was lower was more yeah but worse and it was like you know like have you ever worked with like a crusty old comedian that's been around for 30 years I mean you're working with one right now present company excluded I don't want to

But like these road dogs We'll be all these road dogs Would get the featured on that show And there was like All of it They're magicians There were Impressionists They're intriloquists

And uh And they were showing it on the CHCHH And then it was like it had You know like stay tuned for MASH or whatever Like it still was just like As if you'd turn on TV I have watched MASH Yeah what's your thought?

Amazing show Really? No I'm kidding Oh yeah You got me yeah it's a show that we've talked about this before but it was like the it was always on TV when we were young and it was like just not fun it was like the wait mash or okay yeah it was like this is when you know the fun time is over whatever like saved by the bell you were watching

is over and now it's a serious comedy yeah it's and it had a laugh track right sometimes yeah Which is, that was, I love that era where it would just be like the Flintstones with a laugh track. You're like, yep, sure, this was shown to an audience. I mean, they could. I guess they could. But, yeah. Because, like, there's shows where, with, like, pre-taped segments that have an audience. Yeah.

Oh, you're right. Like, during the pandemic, uh, the debaters did a show that, like, was recorded in a studio. And they had a guy whose whole thing was an engineer worked like a laugh track. So he had, like, a keyboard. and they had like different laughs and different like pitches and and he would like decide what a joke got which is kind of rude because like sometimes he wouldn't respond very positively but yeah that's that guy it was his whole gig was he was I wonder where he is now in hell absolutely he better be um Dave what's going on with you man oh I told you not much no sure I but I refuse to believe it yeah the other The other day I was at the grocery store. You've been, you've seen this place.

Yeah. Yeah. You heard about these places? Yeah. Yeah. It's, uh, you got food. You know, you couldn't shop around the perimeter for healthy stuff or go to the aisles for all the pre-packaged to goodness. That's where you are.

Are you in the, are you in the, I do it all. Yeah. But this one was a, uh, this was just sort of like a quick pickup. I think it was on the way to pick up my kids from school. And I was like, let's hit up the grocery store for a handful of things. And I saw. the lineups to check out. There's a big lineup for the self-checkout.

But the express lane had no line. And I was like, oh, go in there. And I was looking at my basket and I thought, do I have less than 15 items? Right. If it's like stuff like fruit or vegetables, I always will try to go. Because I don't want to learn. I don't want to screen. Boop, boop.

Yeah. I want it just to scan. They know the numbers. What do you, are your self-checkout or? No, I hate self-checkout. that reason. Yeah. Also, I, like, I feel like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm, like, got a, got a rush, got to get

out of here because people are waiting behind me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's on them. Mm-hmm.

For the line. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I, so I go in the self-checkout line. And as I'm like, there's no, there's no one else there. There's just the cashier.

And as I'm taking things out of my basket and putting them on the conveyor belt, I'm counting, like, is this 15 items? and then I get to 15 items and I see I still have three things in my basket. It's a lemon, a lime, and an onion. Throw them away. It's the only way. But like, no one's counting. No.

And then I go stand at the other part where I'm going to have to bag the stuff up and pay. Yeah. And another guy gets in line behind me and he's looking and he goes, you know, this is the express line. See, and that's why I refuse to use self-check cover people like that who are actually keeping trash out of your time and rushing you. I said to him. What an evil person. Yeah, absolutely.

He said, this is the express line. And I was like, and just kind of like, not in a confrontational way, but just kind of in a funny way, like, just to see if he's joking. Right. Oh, are you counting? That's what I asked him. And he said, no. But it says 15 items.

Like, how can he? He was counting. He can just see what he was counting. Yeah. And this seems like more than 15 items. And the cashier was like, no, I think it's less than 15. Like, he was on my side. Oh, that's nice.

He just was trying to de-escalate the situation. Do you? And that's why he's there, actually. I'm not cashier, just conflict, resolutionist. Yes. Of the grocery store. That's his job. What is your, what is your go-to kind of conversation while things are being scanned in?

Do you just say, how's your day going or weather out there? Or do you just, do not say anything? I don't say anything. Oh, I have my, I'm AirPods in. I'm listening to a podcast. Okay. You're just, well, I'm not rude about it. Well, I say hello.

I, uh, I'm usually like bagging, like I'll help out with the bagging or I'll do all the bagging. Yeah. I do all the bagging. So I'm focused on that. What's, uh, Have you guys ever, like, been somewhere and had to get, like, a paper bag for this stuff? Like, that shit's crazy.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's insane. It's just wrong. Yeah. Like, you believe people used to, that used to be it.

Yeah. Like, you would carry out two. I mean, I guess only two. You couldn't do more than two. No. No. Or if you had the shopping cart, you could load more. That's true.

But with the plastic bags, you could always have handfuls and handfuls of an handfuls. I can't. I mean, look, it's good that they're being kind of banned, but also do you miss plastic bags a little bit? Absolutely. I need them. I need them, too. And I miss them. And they're out there somewhere because.

Having made a tray of brownies the other day and I was like, I want to wrap these up in something, but. Plastic bag. The plastic bag would be perfect. Yeah. And I don't want to waste a zip lock. I mean, like, I'm always just like, could we have attacked something else? Like, could we have maybe dealt with some kind of oil industry thing and left us alone with the Plastic bags.

I went back to Alberta like last month and then the, we went to a Boston pizza for family dinner. And then this, thank you. And then this server was like, was like, oh, we have, wait, would you like a straw? They're not paper. We're back to plastic. And in my head, I was like, we're fucking doomed. Like she was like so excited about the plastic straw, which, yes, I'm happy by the plastic straw because paper straws are terrible. Yeah, terrible.

But it was just like, okay, we're just going on. all the way back around all the progress culturally we've made because it's dumb it was dumb things to start with it was like we're going to make it a personal responsibility

of like the small consumer and not the oil and gas companies yeah and it's just like oh man you know when you like you forget to bring a tote bag sometimes plastic bag fit everything fits in plastic bag and you know what if it needs a little security

double bag yeah double bag that was great um the uh really the mess of times I don't know if I read a headline or overheard a little bit of a conversation But they were talking Someone was talking about how the paper straws

They have glue in them Oh You know of course To hold it together while it's falling apart in your mouth Yeah But it's also if you get If you get like So now you're sucking glue

Go suck glue I feel like you get, if you go to the movie theater or whatever, you get a paper straw, but also a plastic guy on top to put the straw through it. So come on. Exactly.

Get us back our straw. My kids bring them back. I give them juice boxes. Do they have paper straw and juice boxes? They have paper straw, but paper straw wrapped in plastic. Exactly. It doesn't make sense.

Glute into the container. Yeah. And there's also glue. Yeah. It goes on glue. Yeah, you go so glue. So I tell them, don't use the straw. I mean, just poke the hole and squeeze.

whiz the juice box into your mouth. Just not a principal. And just kind of like as a party animal. You want your kids to be cool. Yeah. What are you doing to ensure that your kids are cool? Or have Riz, actually. Yeah.

I think it's mostly I want the elementary school to have a frat. Oh. Or some kind of Greek system. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was in a sorority. Don't do it. It's terrible. Tell us everything about being in a sorority.

What university? Simon Fraser. Okay. Which they're actually not, like, allowed there, but they just did it anyway, because you just say that you're like a philanthropy club. Oh. And then. But did you live together? No.

Oh, okay. Because there's like, yeah, it's like, there's like two or three. It's a really small system where it's like, yeah. UBC has them. Has a huge community and they live in houses together. Yeah. And then U of A, like University of Alberta, has a huge Greek community, too, where they live together. And that sounds like hell.

Yeah. I mean, Hades, if it's a Greek system. Yes, thank you. I mean, as a young person that you'd be in university, there's no conditions bad enough that you can not overcome them. Oh, my God, yeah. Living in a frat house kind of seems cool.

Yeah. You like sticky floors. I mean, but like you're going to get sticky floors anyway. I guess. Like I wasn't, I went to you, Vic, and they didn't have them there. And I, you know, I object to the, the, frat lifestyle but like the house part seems fun yeah the parties for fun and like you know like beer pong stuff like that yeah the hazing oh the hazing the best part yeah oh man i just

that would be the whole thing i wouldn't care if i got it or not just like just yeah haze me trick me prank me um anyway so uh i did get away from the express line i did manage my stuff they didn't they're never going to cut you off also like they're never going to be like well pick 15 things you you have 18 here yeah you got to kill three of your baby ever like I think way back in the day when I'd be shopping when I'd be shopping yeah great and be shopping uh you paying cash and then you're like oh no I'm like two or three items over my cash level and so then you have to make an executive decision of like what do I not but now you can just go into debt.

That's right. I use the self-checkout almost all the time. Because you don't have anxiety. Well, I just also. They're not fearful of the competition. I should be fearful. What am I doing? I'm doing their job.

And I also feel like sometimes there's cashers just hasn't had anybody for a long time. So I go in just. Oh my God, really? Yeah. Like, just if I'd like see that they're so bored, be like, I'll give them a a minute's worth of sheer entertainment. I do like it when they...

Yeah, that's right. Anyways. Gotta practice my set tonight. I like it when they come out and like if you're in a really long checkout line and someone opens up a new checkout and they're like, hey, come over here. And then one person goes and the other, like two people go at the same time and then one person gives them. Oh, I'm going to be first in line. Oh, no, I'm not.

Yeah, it is a big moment when somebody opens a new tell. Yes. Yeah. And, oh, like, here's something I find that at grocery stores, this is my cool thing I do. I memorize the name of the bulk bin things, the number. Oh, the number. The number. The number.

The number four, five, three, eight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Five, three, one, six is. Whoa, you're good. Your checkout guy good. Maybe you should get on this. Is that the dream? That's the dream.

Well, sometimes that's my dream. Is being a checkout person? Just, it's so chill. So chill. It'd be really boring, though. Absolutely. But then I'm, I'd rather that. I like when they're like, and what is this? Then you're like cilantro. Yeah. Is this cilantro or parsley?

It's, come on. Leave me alone. The other day, a guy, I guess it was like a young cashier. And he was like, what kind of lettuce is this? It was like green leaf. Oh, the fancy. I mean, they're all green leaf. Yeah, exactly.

Even the red leaf lettuce is pretty much green leaf lettuce. See, this is why you'd be a good checkout person because you can make a little conversations about it. Last time I went, the guy saw my name on my membership card and he said, oh, is your last name Hungarian? And I was like, no, it's Ukrainian. Pretty nearby. And he says, neighbors, actually. That's fun. That's a little fun back and forth.

um there's i was talking to a cashier once because she was wearing a shirt like it was she had her uniform over a shirt but i could tell that it was a um black sabbath so i asked her about she like black sabbath and she said she's going to see them she went and saw them at that last concert where ozie osborne performed oh like recently uh yeah yeah like his farewell cause farewell concert so she flew over there to go and then i haven't seen her since so i Yeah, that was the last time I got no info of how it went or anything like that. Maybe she, maybe she,

is a ghost? Murder suicided him. What a twist. But yeah, I, uh, also, how is, how the grocery store know that you scanned in all your things, right? Even with the camera, like, it's the, like, it's the, like, it's the, I've never stolen from a grocery store. too so bad. Well, there's the Shopper Drug Mart right in our neighborhood and I wouldn't steal from them because

if I get banned from there, I'm screwed. Yeah. Yeah, it's too close to your house. You need to do crime like far away. Yeah. And then a lot of them have like a like they weigh it or like every time every, you can't just scan, scan, scan, you have to scan and put it in the like Yeah. Oh, maybe that's it and that'll just say like

please put it in the basket. Yeah, weird item in area. Yeah. Oh, shit, that's right. Okay. But man, I want to steal. Because you know why? Stuff's so expensive.

Oh, yeah. One time I was at the self-scanner, and I forgot to scan one of the things. And, like, the cashier hasn't been doing anything for hours, but she was like, eagle eyes. So she went bananas are and she knew the number. 411. Yeah, yeah. And I was like, where are they 401? Yeah.

It's the, like, on the shortcuts on. the self-checkout it's one of the three things that is like what else is in there i want to say maybe lemons maybe it's an all yellow checkout yeah yeah yams i guess the third yellow yams um but uh what's going on with you um well also i really like that a cashier can afford to fly over and yeah Ozzy Osbourne and like i can't afford to see Ozzy Osbourne here no lying in state So the last few weeks, there's been, and it's resolved now, but there was a giant strike here in B.C. It was a union that covered the general employees union. The B.C.G.E.U. Is that what you're talking about? Yeah.

Because wasn't there another strike happening? Yes. There was many. Oh, and the postal workers are still on strike, but they're working. They're rotating. Rotating, yeah. Yeah. And then there's, yeah, in Alberta, the teacher's strike is still going. Really?

Yeah. I think it's resolved. Is it? I think it's resolved. I know that they went to arbitration and like some members didn't like it, but maybe you're right. It's probably resolved. Yeah, they're back at work, but I don't know if it's like they signed anything. And was it in the summer that the Air Canada flight attendants went on strike?

Yes. Yeah. And then they were forced back to work and they said no. And they, like, they, I don't. I don't know why some unions get forced back to work and they say no and then people are like no or like the courts say it's an illegal strike

and then some people can just refuse to go back to work and it's not illegal I don't know I don't know I don't know I've never been involved in a strike I don't know I would love to I'm going to be on strike I would love to steal and be on strike okay so for the rest of this episode I'm on strike you're on strike don't you get a banner going

you know what I want better conditions better lighting condition Oh, yeah. A third lamp has been added to the fray. Yeah, it's still a lamp, so I'll allow it. Yeah. So that's been one of the... What do we want? Better lighting.

When do we want it? Soon. I don't know. Whenever you get around to it. But one of the groups... This podcast is all about solidarity. Yeah. And solid hilarity.

Nice work. Good job. Well, one of the unions or the people in that union were the liquor department or whatever you would call it. The people, the liquor distribution board. Yeah. The people working at the liquor stores mostly and the warehouses. And it got wild. For somebody who likes to go to the bar, it became, like, it became bizarre.

It became like East Germany. Because the way it works here is all of the liquor goes through the government. And cannabis as well. Yeah, but like you're not going to a restaurant that has cannabis. You're not going to have a cannabis bar. But the, so like if you want liquor, even though there's private stores that are open, they can't get it because it's going through the government warehouses. So it was everywhere had the places that I knew. that had like gluten-free beer gone completely out of stock and then like there's some things that

I just think are reliably always at a bar yeah and so I asked for jameson out of jameson couldn't get a jameson anywhere in the city and so then you had to resorts as a pretty funky alternative yeah I was at uh Simpson's trivia night and one of the women there got a whiskey and it was like apple cinnamon whiskey like it was the only thing that they had and I think they must have taken it out of storage or from an aunt's house. Yeah, there were like all the local breweries, the microbreweries. They could sell their own stuff. Yes.

Yeah. But no whiskey. You'd go into the liquor store, shelves empty. Completely just like. And so I feel like it was the time to like, you know, learn your, learn what else is out there, you know? It's an experiment. Yeah, do some experiments.

So one in this neighborhood, like the wine was dwindling, the beer. was dwindling, the, like, vodka and gin disappeared. Yeah. And then, but there was a wall of the whiskey was all still there, I think. I don't know the places I haunt. Are you a whiskey man? I love whiskey man.

Now that you're gluten-free. Yeah. That tracks. Yeah. I love whiskey. But, yeah, all of a sudden, because Jameson's the go-toe. Every bar has Jameson. Is that Irish? He does. And, and, because I speak to,

Was that Yoda? That's what he Yoda. I'm a little green guy. Top of the morning to you. Well, he's a little green guy too. Proper syntax Yoda. But like one of the things I did was I went into like an independent alcohol store, liquor store, if you will. And they had a couple like four packs of gluten-free beer.

So I was like, I'll buy it, I'll buy it all. And then I took it home and I had one. And it was the most disgusting thing I've ever tasted in my life. Oh, really? So I have like eight of these. So listeners out there, if you want me to send you one of these disgusting cans. As long as you're within slingshots range. What, is gluten-free beer, you've been gluten-free a year, too?

Probably, too, yeah. Is it, like, is it normally good? Are most of them good? There's some ones that are better than others. I feel like there's one that people stock everywhere, and it's fine. But there's better ones, but usually you find them only at the liquor store as opposed to being in a bar. I think, and probably it's illegal to do something like this, but I should go to a bar and pay like a cork-cage fee. You serve me, my gluten-free beer.

You should do that. I pay for the right to be in your establishment drinking that beer. Was it when you did a comedy show at the Vancouver Club? Yes. They all have, like, all the members have, keep their bottles of whatever there. They're like wooden lockers. Yeah. Have you ever heard of the Vancouver Club?

I have. I've never been there. No, it's, uh, and you know what? I'm surprised I've been there. It's a, it's a very old man. Mahogany walls. Mahogany walls. You got it.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And they have like, you can bring your own bottle booze and they'll serve it to you in the bar. And it's weird because you're like, you're limited to whatever you brought. There's no house booze. Mahogany walls.

I put mahog on these walls. Two for two day. That's some solid hilarity. Now that the liquor stores are open. Yeah. Are you getting wasted every night? I did go to one. uh last week and i went and they are like as soon as they're open they had to get all their

like holiday stock out yes so there's all the like peppermine schnops well there was a big candy cane full of fireball oh yeah like little fireball nips yep and then there was why they i still have it from last year i got a bottle of bucarty that had bickarty socks like christmas socks ugly christmas Bacardi Fawks. Yeah. Do you drink it all? Yes. What's your go-to?

I was really sad I couldn't drink espresso martini during the strike. Okay. Because nowhere had like all the ingredients. Well, what isn't his espresso martini? I know it's, is it actually espresso or is it something? Yeah, it's like a shot of espresso and then Kaluwa and vodka. Yikes. Yeah.

It's delicious. Yeah, it sounds delicious. Delicious. Does it keep you up at night? Yes, it does. But sometimes, I need to stay awake. Yeah. I need to be drunk and away.

Exactly. Or, yeah, I drink a lot of wine as well. See, in that, I feel like wine drinkers, you've got an opportunity to explore other countries that make wine, other than your favorite, your favorite brand. I don't know what you call. Is that what you call wine a brand? Winnery? Yeah. Vineyards?

Vineyard. Yeah. Also, when I went to the liquor store, they had. had their big Bordeaux sale, which is like when they bring in the wine from France that they don't like... That's bad. Is it? I don't like French wine. Well, then you...

Hot take. You didn't miss out because... But I went there and it was like you had to have the catalog. There were no price tags on any of the bottles. Oh. This was item 75. There was one time I went to a liquor store and they had on display. It was in like a glass case that I'm.

sure was bulletproof, because it was this giant bottle of whiskey that cost $50,000. So then you bought it. Yeah. Well, I scanned it through and I was like, well, yeah, maybe this is a small bottle of Davis. Oh, it's 10 cents extra for the bottle, for the glass. Yeah, there's a guy guarding it. I don't. That does?

Yeah, it's on those ludicrous bottles of. Not actually ludicrous. Oh, Ludacris's booze. Yeah. I feel like he may have had one. There was a big thing. So a big thing that happened in basketball this year was LeBron James. You've heard of him?

So like, I don't know, 15 years ago, he started his career in Cleveland, and then he became a free agent. And there was this big thing called the decision. Was it called the decision? Where he was going to go. Like, they made a big TV special about him deciding where he was going to play. Yeah. Okay. That's where he famously said.

I'm taking my talents to South Beach. Nice. And then, so this year he did, like, he's now 40. Yeah. But he's still great. And, but his contract was in flux. I don't know. But there was a, he said, tune in tomorrow for my, this TV special of me deciding.

And it was like a big long thing. And he ended up saying, this year, I'm taking my talents to Hennessy. And it was just an ad for Hennessy. I'm going to go. Wrecked on it. Yeah. And I have a bottle of it with his face on it. Really?

Yeah. From before. He's been their spokesman for years. Oh, that's so, oh, I love it. I'll let up to that. It was very Christmas story with the Ovalteen. Yes. Yeah.

I'm taking my talents to Ovalteen. Just thinking about having the giant bottle in a liquor store. You know when they have cars in a mall? Yeah. I feel like that's like, I always, I'm sure that there's just an entryway that has enough of a capacity to let a car in. But you're always like, how they get it here? They get that car in here. This is why I grew up at West Edmonton.

We were there all the time. And so when I moved here, I was like, this is what they have here? Like, I need to go back to Edmonton. Yeah. Yeah, our mall was so impressive. What, did you ever stay overnight in the Fantasley Land? I've never stayed there. You just, this was a day trip.

Yeah. Yeah, that's a day trips. And, like, staying at other hotels, like, nearby. Nearby. But it was, like, it was a holiday to go to the mall. I feel like I did that once where it was like, that was the holiday we went on that year. Well, we would go, like, once a month, like, just to go, like, it's, you know, in the dead of winter, there's nothing to do. Yeah, that's true.

In Kikino, so we'd, like, go and, yeah, make a week and a minute, like, once a month. How, so you're very far north. In the winter, what time does the sun go down? Like 3.30, 3.45 p.m. Damn. Yeah, it was some dark times. Literally. Yeah.

Literally. Did you see Northern lights up that way? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Do you get bored of them? Yeah, like, I don't really, when people travel on these, like, big fancy vacations, like, up north to go see them, I'm like, why? Yeah.

Go somewhere hot. It's the same when people vacation to hear. I'm like, why? Why did you come here? Yeah, why did you come here? I don't really get what they are. Like, I recognize them in the sky, but I'm like, I even did a project in high school on the science of them. Unfortunately, science was in French, and I don't think I understood what I was saying.

And so, yeah, I couldn't tell you what the phenomenon. What is causing the phenomenon? I don't know either. I couldn't tell you either. Yeah. It's cold. Yeah. It's cold.

It's cold. That's all I got for you. Yeah. Is it from the, it's not from the temperatures. It's from the northernness of it, isn't it? I don't know. I mean. I really couldn't tell you.

I know that people. Let's figure it out, guys. This is not a, like, a podcast for a, dummies. We got to get to the bottom of it. We got to say some smart things. What causes the Northern Lights? Oh, they're caused by Aurora Borealis. Oh, I know

I know that. The collision of charged particles, I'm out, from the sun with gases in Earth's upper atmosphere. That's exactly what we all said. Yeah. Because it's cold. Because it's cold up there. Yeah, like, there's people don't know

in the Yukon, it's a big business of Japanese tourists coming and having sex in like camps because it's lucky, yeah. No, you already said yes it is. You said yes it is. You agreed with them. I believe Pasquess Damien Tritter

referred to them as Japanese fuck camps. You heard about this? You guys see this? In the UK, it's a big thing. It is, yep, absolutely. I don't know. Yeah, that might be debunked as well. Well, when I was there, there was a brochure for them.

And it said fuck camp on it. Well, it was like, you know, something fancier than fuck camp, you know, intercourse. It must be crazy, like, to go. Couples retreat. There you go. See? Well, I know that it's like a very kind of a culture shock to go from here to. to like Tokyo.

Tokyo, the city itself has as many people as all of Canada. Yeah. And so there's like skyscrapers where like, you know, you go to a restaurant on the 22nd floor that's just like you can't see it from the street, but there's just like people everywhere. There's people on every floor of every building. And so it must be crazy to then go to the Yukon where there's nobody around. Yeah.

You can have a whole floor to yourself, no problems. Well, there's no floors. You have to conceive on the ground. But yeah, there's like businesses that, like, you don't just go out at night every night. There's somebody's out there and then comes and like, tells, like, wakes you up and come see them. But, yeah, I'd be like, get the fuck away. I was sleeping. Why can't we do this in the morning?

We got to have sex under the thing. But, yeah, it's supposed to be good luck. So anybody out there who's wanting to conceive, Yukon, make it. at the Yukon. Is it only in winter that we see a aurora borealis or is that all the time in the Yukon? I think. I think you see it all the time. Did you see it all the time?

No, we only saw it in the winter. Ah, okay. Yeah. Oh, well, I see it sometimes. Yeah? I see it all the time. Just close my eyes. Just read a book. Well, guys, do you want to move on to some overheard? Yes. You are. Okay. Hey, I'm Jake Heath Van Stratton

from GoFack Yourself, and I'm here with Max Fun member of the month, Josh Mentor, who has been a maximum fund member since 2016. Hello, Josh. Hey, Jake, how are you doing today? I'm so well. And thank you so much for being a listener and supporter of our show. What made you decide to support Max Fun in general and to support our show GoFactor Self? Jordan Morris on Jordan Jesse Go has a thing that he likes to say, which is, you know,

you tip your bartender, a buck a beer, you tip your podcast or a buck a month. You know, I get way more. use out of Max Fun podcast that I do like Disney Plus or Netflix. Well, it's something we very much appreciate. And by the way, when was the last time Netflix selected you as a member of the month? Exactly. Exactly. Josh Mentor, congratulations, and thank you again for being the MaxFun member of the month. Thanks so much, guys. Become a MaxFun member now at Maximumfund.org slash join. Walking about is the podcast about walking.

It's a walkiementary series where I, Alan McLeod, and a fun-friendly guest, go for a walkabout. You'll learn about interesting people and places and have the kind of conversations you can only have on foot. We've got guests like Lauren Lapkis. I figured something out about this map. Like how to read it. Betsy Sedaro. I had no key. That's awesome and nuts.

John Gabris. This is like great. first date for like broke 20 something and more check out walking about with Alan McLeod on maximum fun Overheard Overheard's where you out there

report to us report in my office first thing tomorrow morning we do overheard and we also like to have our guest present their overheard Savannah do you have an overheard Yes, I have two. I love this, this, um, this segment, because I love to over here.

Um, okay. So what it's all about. Exactly. Yeah. Are you a big guy, like, what, I'm an eavesdropping. Do you go out of the way, out of your way, too? Absolutely. I put the AirPods in just so people don't think I'm listening, but I'm hearing everything

you're saying. Yeah. Um, okay. So, and then my first one is, I was walking down the street and this guy was yelling into his phone really loud. Um, um, She put all of our chats into chat GBT and asked if I was gaslighting her. Can you believe it?

And it was really funny. People need. So he's leaving it up to the chat GBT to be a detective. Yeah. People need friends just to like, hey, can you tell me if this person's gaslighting me? Yeah. Exactly. And this is the loneliness epidemic of men.

Thank you. Yeah. I. Wait, was it a man? It was a man. He was like. Men don't get gaslit. Men gaslight.

Gaslight. No, exactly. Yeah. He was saying that his girlfriend put all of their chats into chat TBT. Oh, okay. And then asked. Yeah, all right. If he was gaslighting her.

And was he? Probably. Yeah, probably. Just trust your gut on that. Absolutely. Don't trust the chat. Yeah. GPT, that is.

The, yeah, I'm trying to think, do I don't, have ever been gaslit? I don't think so, but how would I know? How would you know? You're like, seems like a trusting person. Yeah, maybe I trust too much. Graham, I don't really understand it. Like, I don't, I wouldn't know it to see it. I think it's like you say, you tell the person like all the time that they're insane or their reaction to something.

Or then they lie about what they, or this is what you did last. That didn't really happen. Well, your way you're seeing it wrong. Yeah. Yeah, it's like someone who's just lying and kind of convince you of their reality. So even though you live the same thing. Yeah. So it's hard to like, you wouldn't like see it.

Yeah. Unless you're in that close relationship with that person who's gaslighting you. Yes. So. Graham, you're a dumb bitch. I don't remember I'm hearing that before. Well, you said it to yourself last night in the mirror. That's gaslighting.

Go cook me an egg. But I already cooked you an egg. You can cook it in the hundred ways that you need to learn in order to get a chef's hat. Yeah. Did you know that's a thing? Really? The chef hat has a hundred folds, each representing a different way to cook an egg. No.

Uh-huh. Hard-boiled. Soft-boiled. Over easy. No, you're gas-lighting us for sure. That's not how I remember it. Have you ever seen that clip where Gordon Ramsey tries to make, uh, tries to make some sort of maybe Lebanese food and he like fucks it up so bad.

And the guy that's, you know, street vendor guy is like, yeah, get away. Like, get away from my food. You're not, you're making something that's like our color. and you're, you're Gordon Ramseying it up. Yeah. How many ways can I cook an egg? Poached. Poached.

Soft hard. And you put poach an egg? But like, well or just like, just do it. I don't know how to poach an egg. I have no idea. Don't know what it is. I don't know what the end result of a poach. Really?

I've never pushed an egg. I've never poached one. I've probably had them. I've, I can poach them, but I'm not, not as good as a restaurant. What are they? Are they really yokey inside or? Well, I mean, it depends. Jammy?

Is it jammy? No. Oh, okay. Maybe it's yokey, maybe it's, maybe you overcook it. Okay. Those are the only two options. How do you do poached? Poached is you cook it and you crack the egg and then like cook it in boiling water.

Okay. Like the, without the shell. Okay. Oh, how do you do that? There's a bunch of techniques I've tried. The thing I like the best is you put it in it, you crack it into a strainer and you get rid of all the little bits of extra water in it. Oh, okay. Maybe not the right way to do it.

Some people add, some people crack them into like a vinegar bath. Yes. Some people add vinegar to the boiling water. And then, but then I put it into a little ramekin or a little bowl. Then I get that right under the, well, then I wait for the water to boil. And then as soon as it boils, I turn it off. And then I put the egg in and I cover the, yeah, off the heat. And then you wait for it to cloud over.

And then do you, is this like with toast? Is this you would eat it with toast? Yeah. You eat with toast, you can eat it on top of. Smoky, all covered in sand. And it is a, you've had like Eggs Benedict. Yes. That's what that is.

Yes. Ex Benedict, that's a, yeah. And then also, uh, geez, scrambled. I can scramble. That's it. Yeah. That's it. What's your scramble technique?

Just wait. Do you scramble? Do you scramble? Do you scramble? Do you scramble in the pan or in the... Yeah, I just kind of like put it in the pan and then I wait until it's basically an omelette and then I flip it once.

That's how I hate scrambled pan. Really good technique. I saw a video of a guy making... I don't know what this guy's problem is, but he was like, we're not calling him meal prep because there's like a lot of baggage with meal prep, apparently. But he was like, I'm making 60. breakfast burritos

and so he cracked like 18 eggs I want to do it but what if you overdo the eggs and you're eating that for the next 20 days yeah I don't like

does your partner do the cooking or do you just neither you just get all delivery all the time no we split it I'm just the worst cook okay

can you make like what's your number one thing is it scrambled eggs no my number one thing is probably like Salad dressing Nice What's your

What do you do in a salad dressing? Just the easy oil vinegar Oil vinegar Salon pepper garlic Oh garlic Maybe some Dijon mustard I do on the barbecue I do a

Well it's a beer can chicken But I don't use a beer can It's when you get a whole chicken And you stick a beer can up there Yes But I use a different sort of I bought it special thing so you don't use a receptacle yeah and then you fill it with beer and then

it's more expensive than just buying a rotisserie chicken every time it's because it's with the price of a chicken and a beer um speaking when you mentioned mustard I was like the other night I was having this conversation that was like well Canada is the number one producer of mustard in the world we must and then some site said that it's Canada and then some sites said it was Tibet or Nepal. Why do you, why did you that cross your mind? I think because I was eating an hamburger and I saw the mustard.

And did it would like, did you feel pride? Like Canada's got to be no. Yeah, I was like, yeah, we rule. And then I checked it out. And it was like, yeah, it checks out. And then I checked another site that says Nepal, maybe. So I don't, I don't know.

Now I don't know who to believe. I mean, maybe we just produce mustard seed. Well, Nepal they make Bottle it That's where French just comes from Do you have So you have another one

Oh yes Do you want to go now Or do you want to go around Okay, we can go around All right Go ahead Dave, you're on Mine's an overseen

The other day I was Driving down Next to a school And you were talking about People stepping in dog poo What I saw was A woman Leaning up against her

car with her foot like you know she was looking at her foot and she was pouring hand sanitizer on the sole of her shoe i mean oh i guess i feel like you're you know you're you're you're pouring bad money after good or yeah what you want to do is you want to get in an evo and really scrub them on those mats they just walk through the grass a bit and then the hand sanitizer Well, it's not going to do anything. No. But I feel like I'm on her side because, like, what if she wasn't sure of it as dog or human? So if, like, human, you don't want the germ because it's, like, human.

But dog, you can kind of, like, put in the back of your mind. Yeah, I want that dog germ. You just ignore it. They don't have germs. I think I'm, I mean, this wasn't, how do you know? But this didn't seem like a neighborhood with a lot of human excrement. But, yeah, like you say, how do you know? Yeah.

How do you know? Um, yeah, uh, my overheard. Okay. Um, comes from, uh, I went to Remembrance Day, uh, what would you say? Ceremony? Ceremony. And have you gone before? Yeah.

Yeah, I usually go. At the Cenotaph? No, this is on Salt Spring Island. Oh, okay. It was at their local park. Oh. And they had, and they had a guy on the mic introducing everybody as they came in at Laid Reiths. Uh, but he didn't.

know he just kept talking to the microphone he's talking to the people right next to him so it would be like uh you know corporal uh Mitch McCain and uh and a girl guide and he'd go I say who's up I don't think he's here oh and that so every time he goofed up it was so and so and a girl guy yeah he just okay just pick another girl guy but uh he did it once and like people laughed and then though he kept doing it and people It just got funnier and funnier. But you're supposed to be silent, but it was like... So and so and a girl guy.

What is, like, I've never gone to Remember's Day Ceremony. We did a lot of assemblies at school. Yeah. With people playing like... In Flandersfields. Yeah, there would be someone would play the bugle. Yeah. Someone would read in Flandersfields.

There would be like, someone would edit a video of... of that Metallica song about a guy who came back from war and a bunch of war footage and also mother do you think they'll drop the bomb by Pink Floyd You told me Megadeth

doesn't fit in here at all there's not room for Megadeth and then yeah that would be it but so at the like official one at the Victory Square they have soldiers there yeah and they lay wreaths

yeah on Salt Spring Island And are there soldiers? Yeah, there's vets. There was one guy there that I think was like a 101 or something. Oh, wow. And they're, yeah, like, and they have like a local RC&P detachment. So they're kind of involved in, remember, today they would show up. You have girl guides apparently.

Girl guides are there, you know, to save the day, really, if you don't know. And it's like they announce each wreath as they bring it up. And so it's fine, you know, it's like the fire department, as I was bringing fire department. And then it'll just be like, Whiskers Pet Store. Oh, sure. Yeah. And then there was one called, oh, I can't remember the name, but it was their local

cannabis store. And it was the pet store, they were saluting vets, but the other kind of vets. Yeah. Not the war vets. Very inclusive. Yeah. Yeah. It's, um, anyways, it was a lot of fun.

This guy talking into Mike, didn't know how to Mike worked at all. Hmm. Remember last year when the. mayor showed up wearing uh lend to the ceremony and he had like sneakers on yeah what a cool guy yeah real real frat mayor oh the other thing sometimes they do is like they'll do a flyover oh yeah assembly military planes flyer that's fun you know you see you like oh look at that and then it goes off who knows where drops a bomb i don't know i have no idea what they do do you go to them ever um i have gone but yeah whenever i see a flyover my brain

is like, they're dead. They're crashing. They're the crash. They're too close to the earth. It's them or me. They're either going to crash or bomb me. Like, I can't look at them because there's going to be a horrible accident. I can't look at it.

Understood. So, yeah, I'm really fun to go to these. Well, and it's supposed to be a fun time. Boy, you're really just harshing our buzz here. The Remembrance Day ceremony. Do you have one more? Yes. Oh, yes.

My other over-herher. heard that I thought of. So I was in Palm Springs at a Mexican restaurant, and there was, like, this big table of, like, elder gay men. And, like, the lead one was sitting, like, right behind me. The lead one. The lead one. And I say the lead one, because he was the one talking the entire time. Right.

But what I heard that made me tune in was he started saying, I worked in New York City when the magazines had money. And then I just was, I was locked in. And then it was like 90 minutes of just like me and my partner, not speaking, just drinking and margarine, like, listening to every story he had about like the fashion parties that he went to and like the models that were there. And like it was really cool to me because I love, first of all, I love eavesdropping. Yeah. Being nosy. And I love just like, yeah, fashion and PR and like New York City, obviously. Are you excited for the devil wears product too?

Yes. Yes, I am. Thank you so much for asking. That's my culture. You, I feel confident in saying that you're one of the best dressed comedians at all of the country. Thank you so much. You know, certainly it's easy to beat the male contingent because most of them are dressed like they just rolled out of bed. Yeah.

Well, I mean, that Canadian guy necktide. That's a pretty good. There's, yeah, there's a couple that dress well. Yeah. A handful. We know them. But, yeah, thank you. Yeah.

You put together a nice outfit. What can I say? There's this one guy. that a comedian, I bombed so hard at this show. And then this other comedian came up to me. It was like, at least your outfit was really good. That haunts me. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But your outfit was probably good. Thank you. The last time I said you performed, you wore a very sparkly pants. I did. That's my new pants. Yeah. Oh, they're new.

I was really excited to wear them. Thank you. Do you ever worry that when you get an applause at the end of your set, it's because people like your outfit? Well, she can't have it, but you can't have it both ways of like, well, you bombed, but at least you had a good outfit. Well, you had a great set, but it was because of your outfit. No, no, no, I tell everyone all the time, I'm like, I don't care if they, they'll, they'll listen to me because they like my outfit. And then that's, I just need them to lock in for my five minutes.

Yeah. Now, say you were going to film a special. Yes. Are you buying an outfit just for that special? Are you going with an outfit that you know. This is my, this is the funniest outfit. Yeah. No, that's what I'm looking for.

The funniest outfit. Yeah, just a clown suit. Christy the clown. Yeah, Tracy the clown. No, if I do a special, it's going to be, I'm going to get three quick changes in there. Wow. Oh, cool. That's my plan.

So, yeah, I'm writing it right now. So one day it'll be out of the world. So are you writing the material or just the quick changes? Oh, I'm writing the materials. Materials written. I'm just writing the production. The material is lace, leather. Now, we also have overheard sent into us by people all over the world.

If you want to send one in, you can send it to do SBIY at maximumafund.org. And let me tell you, I put out a call for people to send more written-known ones. You guys answered to the call. I appreciate it very much. I've been getting a lot of calls, like the called-in ones, of people being like, well, Graham asked for more overheard. So I'm calling this one in. So I think the lines got crossed out. These were written in ones.

But we love you either way, you know. So this first one comes from Hannah M. Nova Scotia. I was texting with my daughter, and I didn't answer her fast enough, so I texted, Patience is a virtual. The next day, my other daughter and I were working on something, and I said, this is taking too long. And she said, didn't you say something about patience is a vulture? Cute.

That's cute. Oh, man, when someone won't reply fast enough, when I need it. Yeah. Or sometimes when they are responding, but it's like dot, dot, dot, dot, banished, dot, dot, dot, dot. Piping, yes. Or when you're like, I'll text Abby sometimes when I'm at the store. I'm like, hey, did we need whatever, eggs? And then she won't reply, and then I don't get the eggs.

And then 45 minutes later, yeah, get eggs. Okay. Okay. Here's how stores work. in this this is a little off talk with in movies when somebody's texting what is your favorite way that they've expressed that in movies like sometimes you see the bubble like just in space above them or like you see them you see what they're texting or there's a bunch of different ways they've done is there anybody that likes a particular way i like seeing the actual screen i like seeing what they're actually typing in real time so close up in them yeah yeah the The, each, like, red, yellow and red, green and blue thingy. And, like, I watched a movie called Drop, which is a thriller about somebody is going to kill this woman's daughter. It's not Amy Adams, it's somebody else.

Okay. Somebody at a restaurant, and then they're airdropping her photos of her daughter and stuff like that. We're going to, unless you kill somebody like. Yeah, you're right. It's not Amy Adams. But from the poster, I thought those were her eyes. Yeah. They might have got just for the shoot.

The shoot or just the eyes. Oh, you didn't tell me to start making Fahy and Brandon Sclanar. Or didn't I? And you forgot. Brandon Sclanar is Zeddy. Was that your word last year that you learned? Yeah, Zeddy was the word of the year on my calendar. One word of year calendar.

This next one comes from Dean with this as an overseen. So he describes it pretty well. There's a Subaru cross-check here. Does anybody know what a Subaru cross-check looks like? Yeah, it's like an impresa, but higher up off the ground. Yeah. Here in Saskatoon with a big sign on the back that says Subaru sucks. There's an envelope taped to the back window that says take one.

And inside, there are photocopies of a two-page handwritten anti-suburo manifesto. What? My favorite part is he says he's no longer. welcome at the Subaru dealership, and he writes, hurt my feelings. Super hurt my feelings. And it says, apparently, all this rage is because his radio doesn't work. Oh, man.

When you want it. That's true. When you want to be the ninth caller. I just like, I just have never seen anything like it. Somebody that hates their car so much. I love the free will that were, that person witnessed. The fact that he's going so far as to print individually this manifesto for free in this economy. Yeah.

He really hates Subaru. For free. I mean, printing still pretty. Printing is still pretty cheap. Graham, what kind of card do you have? I have a Subaru in present. Yeah, I also have a Subaru. We're Subaru people.

Yeah. And my radio works just fine. Yeah. um like scanning like uh you know jack fm they play uh 80s in the 90s now uh power 107 no not power 107 the fox yeah 99.9.3 the fox oh yeah take me through your how many pre-programmed ones do you have six we have two pages worth of six okay i've one on mine straight ahead of six you know jack fm's in there 96.9 you know fox 101 you got fox 101 no Fox is 99.3.

101.1.1 is... The peak. It's rock 101. And then there's the peak. And then there's 95.3, which is... That's Z. Z. It's top 40. Yeah, it's your pop hits.

And then for some reason, there's a CBC Radio 2 is in there. Yeah, 105.7. Yeah, it's a lot of strings and singing choir music. But if you get there earlier in the morning, it's... Good. It's drive time. My favorite radio station is CFWE. It's 98.5 FM in Edmonton.

Oh, yeah? In Alberta. It's country music. Oh, it's country music. Okay. That's it. Who is your favorite host? I don't know.

Drive time host? Yeah. Anyone on that? Anybody that? Yeah. Do you like country music? No. It's just the one that I grew up with.

It's nostalgic. Do you ever like if you're feeling homesick go to their website? Yeah, I do. Yeah, I do. And I listen to it. I, there's 104.3 is the breeze here in Vancouver and they are a kind of cool jazz station, except for certain hours, they're a Christian station. You never know until you land on there. And but currently they are a Christmas station.

Oh, yeah, yeah. And there was for a while in Vancouver, there was a comedy one that was like, it was just all stand-up. It was on, it was an AM station. It's an AM station, yeah. I feel like if we all wanted to, we could just get. at our own AM stations. I feel like it must be easier to get. Yeah.

Yeah. They, but there's no, they can't make money. No. You'd be volunteering for yourself. Yeah. But at least I say, hey, I own a radio station. Yeah. Because there used to be, like, the biggest station was the K&W 98.

You fucking, never mind. Just go read your stupid things. What the hell am I doing? How long can we talk about us for our favorite radio station? Like, we're giving the listeners. idea. They're like, oh, maybe I need to tune out and turn on. In Calgary, it was CJ92 in Calgary.

That was the big rock station. I can't remember the guy's name. It was the original drive time host, but... What did I just say? Let's get off. It makes me want it more. This last one comes from Susan Ammon, Woodstock, Ontario. Oh.

I had surgery recently for kidney stones. While I was waiting in the recovery room, an older fella got wheeled in. Still very much under the influence of anesthesia. Yes. Not anesthesia. The Bluth animated movie. He said very loudly,

Did they give me a penis enlargement without skipping beat? The nurse replied, no, they meant it smaller. Not the first time that nurses said that joke. Nurses, they'll give it to you. They will. Yeah. What surgery do you get for, was it, kidney stones?

Sometimes you get like ultrasonic. Do they blast them? They blast them. Is that surgery? I don't know. Right back. Yeah, tell us what's the deal at your local hospital.

In Woodstock. And you know what? Groovy, man. Let us know what the drive time show was in your town growing up. I wouldn't even know what the drive time show is. I just know. Well, I guess the morning show is what I'm thinking of.

But, like, does the show have a name or just the host? Oh, Jerry Forbes. That was the guy at CJ90. That is a great name. Yeah. He had a powerful mullet. Very powerful. I thought you're going to say powerful voice. No, no, his voice sucked. What powers did it have? What powers did his voice have? Yeah, no, it's a mullet. Oh, uh, flight.

Okay. Fright and Sight. The big three. Okay. Oh, no, I, wait, no, we're good. In an initial overhards that are written And we also accept your phone calls If you want to call in

Or send us a voice memo Here's how you do it Voice memos SPY You say okay Get out your phone You open up the voice memo app You hit record

You talk into it And then when you're done recording You can There's like a thing on the bottom That says send it And you can send it to us SPY at maximum fun.org Or if you want to call us

Call 1 844-779-7631 That's one SpyPy pod one. Like these people have... And for people out there, if you screw up, just record it again.

You don't have to be... Yeah, you don't have to say... Well, no, send us the bloopers, for sure. But maybe in one email. Yes. No, it's fine. I mean, I got the time. All right, here we go.

One second. Hey, quick overheard at Target. Early 30s couple walking by and I overheard Frank Sinatra I wonder if you had Riz What?

All right I'm off Frank Sinatra I wonder if he had Riz That was his whole thing Yeah He was all Riz was I It was all Riz

I mean I'm getting angry At how you wonder that They should have called him Frank Riznatra I also like that this phone calls Well by the way That was a phone call

call. That's the difference between a voice memo is our phone calls are sounding worse and worse. But I do like that this one started with. Hey, one second, shh. I'm trying to call my friends. Yeah, he had Riz. Yeah, absolutely. And somehow he had Mia Farrow.

God knows. What do you mean somehow? They were a couple. Yeah, but what do you mean? We just said he had Riz. Oh, yeah, but I don't believe. that he has Riz. I think he has the opposite of Riz.

What's the opposite of Riz? Zer. He's got Zerp. I think it's lacking ORA. Mm. Oh, okay. Or is the new Riz. Shit.

I've been out two steps right. Mm-hmm. Oh, fine. Yeah, sorry. Hey, it's all right. He's Rizlissless. There we go. There we go.

And Mary Rizlisless to everyone listening. You know, the 104.3, the breeze is now a Rizlislist station. Is that true? Mm-hmm. All December? Uh-huh. And November. And January, probably.

Hello, guest, Gerym, Dave. I have an overheard of the kids. Uh-huh. Variety. I was trying to get my kids to go play outside, so they had been talking about their imaginary friends, and I said, oh, all your imaginary friends are outside She'll play out there

And immediately My youngest said No, you can't see them You haven't done the paperwork If you want to see them You have to do the paperwork first They're on your head Off I go

Yeah I mean Fuck, I don't know the rules with an imaginary friend Um Do either you guys imaginary friends as a young kid? No. I don't remember.

I like the idea of them. And you hear about fictional characters having them. Yeah. But no. No. Certainly the John, from the imagination of John Krasinski. Oh, sure.

I mean. There was that movie. If? Yeah. Yeah. If stands for imaginary friend. Yeah. From the imagination of John Krasinski.

Yes. God. His imagination's fertile. I know. You know? He came out with that silence movie. That's terrible silence movie. Yeah.

And then he was in a Rogers commercial. Yeah. Then he made that COVID show about having some good news for once. And that got optioned. It's like, they were like, we're going to turn this into a full-blown thing. But I think he's like, I'm Jack Reacher or whoever. Yeah. He's not Jack Reacher.

He's Jack Reacher, basically. Shadow recruit. Jack. Tom Clancy's Shadow Recruit is named Jack Reacher Thanks Chad GVT Jack Ryan

Jack Ryan Nice And there's like In those movies It's solid Do you know what we're talking about? No Okay

Jack Ryan is a character created by Tom Clancy He's a shadow recruitsy He appears in the movie Clearly and present danger, Patriot Games, Red October the Hyundai for, and finally, the sum of all fears. And he was last year the sexiest man? I know what John Krasinski is, yes.

No, but I'm just trying to think was it last year. No, Jack Ryan was. Oh, shit, okay. But yeah. Jack Ryan has been portrayed by Alec Baldwin, Harrison Ford, Ben Affleck, And finally, John Krasinski. Thank you.

You're welcome. You taught me about Riz. Dave teaches you about Tom Glancy. Here's your final phone call. Hey, this is Julian. I'm from Minneapolis, Minnesota. And sorry, I was Trevor from being sick. I was just in a doctor's office,

Boozy doctor's office where they were offering beverages to the people waiting and the guy next to me the lady came up and said would you like to coffee and he said for what and she said for drinking

and he said oh no thank you anyways have a good life right great sign up see you in hell that is

that is a boogey doctor's office if they're there's like shrink surface yeah yeah they have flight attendants coming through um oh yeah and like if you ever fly on the small airline that goes to Victoria and Vancouver they got a nice little coffee set up there free coffee and I wonder if that doctor's office is like after 11 a.m. we can start serving booze or does everybody that they take their vitals like your heart's racing a little bit yeah um what Well, that brings us to the end of the show. Savannah, where can people find you?

If they want to find you online, they go to... Savannah underscore Rasmus on all platforms. And you have a show every month, including this week. Yes, on the 19th at the projection room at the Fox Cabaret at 830. Camp comedy? Camp comedy. Well, thanks again for being the show. Thank you for having me.

And thank you all the years there. If you go to the show this week, oh, the outfit is going to be... It's actually going to be really good. Yeah? I got a new outfit. Okay. Seriously, people, go see that outfit. Come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasts at yourself.

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