Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 925 - Conor Holler

Episode Date: December 9, 2025

Comedian Conor Holler returns to talk the future, the planetarium, and mime. Follow us: Instagram, Facebook, Bluesky. Join our Discord.

Hey, folks, we're about to get to this great episode this week. And, oh, the laughs that are in store for you. Yeah, it's a naughty list and nice list. You all are welcome to just have a big jelly-filled belly and just ho-ho-ho your way through the holidays. Right. But what we wanted to do right now is tell you, there's a thing we do every year where we climb down the chimney and we hang things up. That's true. We climbed down the chimney and hang things up.

Pictures that you have the meeting to hang up. Anyway, so the last episode of the year, the last few years, we do a special thing where we invite you, the listeners, to be our guests. Which we've always kind of felt like you're the third host. Yeah, you're sort of like the city and the sex of the city. Sex of the city. And we're going to do that again this year. Yeah. And this is going to happen on December 17.

It's a Wednesday at 11 a.m. Pacific. Pacific, yeah. That is, it's about a two-hour time slot we're doing for this. What happens is, if you want to be on our year-end show where we chat with our listeners, what you've got to do is you've got to email us, SPY at maximum fund.org with the subject, Q and A. Q&A, okay, Q&A. And then we will randomly select from the emails we've received people who will call into the show.

We'll give you a Zoom link and then we'll give you a time and you will call into the show and chat with us for, I don't know, five minutes, ten minutes, I forget. I like Fiverr, I think a Fiverr. Yeah, maybe a Fiverr. So if you want to be part of our listener episode on December 17th, between 11 and. And one Pacific, that would be about two and four Eastern or, I don't know, like 7 and 9 p.m. British? England? Yeah.

And it should be said, you've got to bring the heat. You got to bring the heat. Yes. We're not, this is not the time to dawdle. If you've got a talent, you've got some kind of thing cooking, that's what we want. We want you to come ready, ready to go from the job. Yeah. So I forgot about that.

That's important. So if you have a talent you want to share, if you have a question for us, if you have a song you want to sing, what are the other categories? There was somebody, what did you say, like throwing, doing dunks or throwing basketballs in the hoop? Oh, that was a talent, yeah. I guess that was a talent. And I don't believe that the gentleman hit it. I feel like maybe he missed a couple times. He hit it and quit it.

So, you know, if you're going to bring it, you better hit it. You better, you know, we're ready and we're ready, and we will kick you up. If you have a talent, if you have a question, if you have a song, if you have a riddle. Ooh, a riddle would be good. Riddle would be good. Yeah. So, SPY at maximum fun.org, if you are free, on December 17th, in that two-hour window described earlier and you want to be a part of the show,

SPY at maximum fun.org and give us the subject, Q&A, and then we'll get back to you if your email is chosen. And you know, you only have one shot. So shoot that shot and be with us for the end of the year. Bye. Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark.

And together we host. Stop podcasting yourself. Woo! Woo! Hello, everybody, and welcome to episode number 925 of Stop Podcasts of Yourself. My name's Graham Clark. With me, as always, is somebody who just, boy, he's so excited for all the holiday treats he's going to be having in this whole month, Mr. Dave Shumka. Yeah, it's the holiday season.

So whoopty-do. and Hickory Dock, and don't forget to hang up your sock. And that's what we're talking about. This is a Christmas-centric episode. What's your favorite holiday treat? You know mine, gingerbread. Yeah, I look forward to my one cup of eggnog per year. So I'm looking forward to that and then feeling, oh, so bad for the hours following it.

But grocery stores have been selling eggnog since September. I know. Wahoo. Wahoo! Is it, people can't be buying it. Somebody, some freak is buying it. Some freak wishes it was year-round. Yeah, because I know freaks who put up their Christmas tree on November 1st.

Yeah. But they're not drinking eggnog. I hope not. Maybe they're making their own at home. Well, why don't they have to if they're on the shelves? If they're, I bet there's freaks who call it gnaug. I just picked up some gnaug. But it might become, because like, remember mini-eggs were only around for Easter

once upon a time, and now they're everywhere all the time. So maybe eggnog is becomes a yearly... Cadbury mini eggnog. What do you... Do you buy mini eggs? Oh, yeah. All year? Yeah, year round.

They're available to me, so why not? There's a local ice cream place that sells a mini egg ice cream in March or April. And what do they call it? Egg hunt. Sorry, what do they call it? Egg hunt. Egg? Hunt, is that right?

Yeah, okay, sorry. Our guest today, a returning guest to the podcast hasn't been on for roughly a decade here. He was banned. He was banned. He knows what he did. But he's back. The time is we gave him a 10-year penalty. It's over.

He's back. It's Connor holler. Hello, Connor. Hi. And I'm not apologizing. Just putting that out there. Yeah, if you had, you wouldn't have been banned. It was very simple.

In this house, we use coasters. Well, you know, well, you've got these, like, kind of cork board situations now, so those are taking care of me. I feel pretty good. Happy to be back. Boy, do you like, what's, how do I want to phrase this question? Okay. What's more important to you? Drink coasters or roller coasters?

Oh, interesting. I mean, in my house, we are big coaster users. We've got a lot of wood. Sure. Told me to brag. Did come out that way, kind of weirdly. So I use coasters more. and then I do like roller coasters

They're just not huge in my lifestyle Yeah I'm not going to Canada's Wonderland No What is in your very woody house Do you use a lot of pledge That's like wood cleaner It's like wood polish

No I mean we have a dog too So we kind of let the dog just like Run wild Did you ever polish the dog? Yeah we'll polish the dog We're not using pledge for that though Do we get to know us? Nope

Let's get to know us Get to know us Got right into the coaster Roller Coaster I'd like to get a little You know Get to know us is serious But this

Connor It's been 10 years It's been a lifetime You moved away to Toronto Yep You gave the finger to Vancouver You lit the bridge on fire As you left

And then what happened What happened to you You were doing comedy shows here All the time here You're doing sketch And putting on crazy big shows Are you still doing Sketch at Ket

Café Mallmark? You know, is Café Mallmart still around? It could be. That block hasn't been... I could tell you it's not. It feels like the kind of place that closes after three years.

A lot of money lost. But that block does seem like it would have been bulldozed at this point and it hasn't. That's true. There's a lot of... And I hope. I hope that places on Main Street

Etel are not zoned for condos, but you're in Toronto. I'm in Toronto. What did you do? What did you do? You went there to do a long time. Yeah. So, what did I do?

When I first went out there, I... When you left, you thought, they're not going to still have a podcast when I come back. I have checked in over the years. Oh, yeah? Yeah, I'm like, damn, these guys were like the OG podcasters. Yeah, we're the, you know, iced tea and flavor flavor of podcasting. We were there at the beginning. And it shows.

It does show. I'm absolutely the flavor of this episode. You're a hype man. I just kind of like don't really add much to it. That's not true. But I feel like podcastings must have, like, changed a ton since I don't know we're doing kind of get to know me. Oh yeah. No, no.

It's like it's it's blossomed into a career that you could get $100,000 a month doing if you have the right. Yeah, not us. No, not us, but other podcasts. And also there was no king of podcasts like Joe Rogan before. Right. Like who was the king

of podcast when we started? There wasn't one. Really? And like when we started? Yeah. NPR maybe. I feel like you guys are up there on that list, right? Were you not like one of the first comedy podcasts? Yeah, we were there. We were early. Yeah.

Yeah. And as you see, it's left us dominant over the field ever since. Yeah. I mean, I've got a lot of wood in my house now. Yeah,

that's true. We're recording some wood. Pledge is next. Did you ever, have you guys, did you ever pledge? Like, as an adult.

I just allegiance to the flag. Oh, that's nice. Have you pledged as an, no, I clean my wood one leg at a time. I cleaned, I just,

wipe, I'm a wipe, just wipe it down. Household cleaner. I feel like I pledged, not for like anything, well, I was going to say not for anything worthwhile, but it was for Terry Fox. So that was the wrong thing to say.

For like, you know, when you do those like kids runs and stuff like that, you collect pledges or make a pledge, something like that. Unis-F. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Come back later. I'll give you a quarter. So what do you, what do you move Toronto? Were you

running to something? Were you running for something? I was running to something at the time. So in Vancouver, when I left, I was doing a lot of, like, web series and kind of video stuff on the internet, like back. And what does that clicking noise? Oh, that's me clicking. That's my epiloges. That's my metronome, keeping me on time, keeping my voice nice and steady. Yeah, so I was doing, I was doing videos, and this would be like pre- YouTube, putting them on Vimeo.

This was Prime Vimeo. Yeah, exactly. what's the name of the, like you put together a show that took place at a radio station? Yeah, we did it's called Mental Beast. Mental beast. I still like the name of it's pretty weird. So I did that here in Vancouver

and then I had an opportunity to go out to Toronto to go to the Canadian Film Center. Oh yeah! Which was great. Kind of pushed me further into like making movies and kind of getting into Canadian film and TV. And I spent about five years doing that, like making weird mostly interactive projects. Like what?

This is fascinating. They're all weird. I would say not commercially successful. So probably the kind of thing that you've never heard of. I'm into it. It sounds like Canadian film. Yeah.

Oh, it's right in there. It's weirder than Canadian film, Dave. It's Canadian interactive. Just as commercially unsuccessful. So this is like, you know, at that time, there was a lot of money in Canadian film to make these properties. The men with brooms

The men with brooms The rich interactive website So that was the kind of stuff I did For about five years And then after that time I was kind of thinking As is my pattern Get kind of a little bit bored

Do something for five, six years I kind of want something fresh Yeah So I went to grad school Went to OCD for a design degree Shit In a field called strategic foresight and

innovation. Perfect. Which is basically like, here's how you can think ahead in terms of the future, what it looks like, and how you can use that to create strategies and products and things. Wow. That are going to be more relevant as the world

kind of moves ahead. Right. Wow. Yeah. So it was really cool. It was super interesting. I did that for a number of years. And then that kind of pushed me into more like business world. And then I kind of joined a corporate... You became a businessman.

I became a businessman. Wow. Just full corporate, big four accounting, consulting firm. Graham, name the big four accounting firms. Procter and Gamble. Is it in there, okay. Sanford and Sons. Do we cheat him and how?

And acne. And acne, that's right. The big four. Now you were from North Van? West Van. West Van. Yeah. A little further west than Northman.

Yeah. There's more wood in West Van. I bet. And then it was, had you lived here your whole life? My whole life, yeah. So I was here until, it was like the day after the Olympics closed. Oh, really? So I stayed for the Olympics the next day.

You were gone? Wow. You left, were there any athletes on your plane? Yeah, exactly. Did you go out with anybody? I don't think so. I mean, not where I was sitting. I was sitting in like the far back, you know, Air Canada.

bad seats. Oh, yeah. How about flying over? Flying in a better seat this time coming back to Vancouver or what? Are you still way in the back? Unfortunately not. No. And I always blow it.

You know, like, I think I had a better seat when I actually booked my ticket. But when they make you check in, this happens to me every time. And part of it is that I just don't like pay attention to things very well. Sure. So I'm like going through checking in, like thinking I'm doing a great job, you know. Like this is great. Like my wife didn't have to tell me this time. And I'm like on top of it.

Are you here by yourself? I'm here by yourself. Okay. So I'm like going. I'm checking in and it prompts you like, pick your seat. Right. I go see what seats are left and they're all like garbage seats in the back. They're all middle seats.

So I pick the best of the worst, which is a middle seat in the back. Yeah. And then I realized that I moved my existing seat, which was better to a worse seat because they prompted me to make the change. Right. Yeah. You have to say continue. Yeah. Yeah.

And it probably cost you extra money, too. It cost me $50 to sit with my, like, arms, hugging my chest together. Did you, what time of the day did you fly out? It was a morning flight. Because they now have free alcohol on domestic flights. They don't always tell you about it. But you can get free beer or free wine. Uh-huh.

That's like a wild move, isn't it? If you see someone, like, really going for it on the airplane. Especially in the morning. Like at night It's like, oh, it'll help me sleep Yeah Imagine they gave you a full pint Just the two six

Yeah, that's true Just take a swig out of this Pass it, pass it back Well, that's great I love hearing about the flight Air Canada or WestJet I feel like they're all bad But it was Air Canada

Okay Yeah Well we know you have a lot of choices out there Sure You have two choices Yeah Now, last time I saw you I don't think you had any tattoos

And now you're a very tattooed man Well, it's the corporate life Yeah Yeah I feel like this is part of the Did you, were you like this one Corporate Life? Oh yeah

Well, I mean, so I did my So remember when I went to Toronto I had probably five year period Where I was in like media world Yeah So that I started to accumulate A few more visible ones On my like forearms

Yeah And then when Take your shirt off Or wait, does you eat the camera's on? Everybody does it on the podcast. Okay, sounds like a grooming situation. This is private stuff. Did you, I remember, did you have a hamburger?

I have, I think I still do. It's still tucked away in here somewhere. It's kind of underneath his other ones. Yeah, I see it. Because you have tattoos for the listener. You have tattoos all down the arms, up onto the hands. We don't know under the shirt, but no, he is doing it back. Oh, wow.

the whole back. Oh, my God. Wow, wow, wow. Wow. You know, Yakuza style. Yeah. This guy made some Eastern promises. Promises I can't keep. So, yeah, when I was at, I keep wanting to say the company, but I'm going to keep saying Big Four. Yeah. So I'll call it Acme for Graham for your sake. Yeah. So when I was at Acme, it was at right at a time when they were like, we are tired of the corporate, the bad corporate image. Right. We want to get a little bit more edgy.

Right. So they're like, oh, this guy's got like enough skills that you can kind of be in the mix, but we really like those arm tattoos. And they put me in all kinds of like literature, you know, like corporate brand things of just like, you know, like office folks like working on a table, but the arms are tattooed. You know, like there's like three people in business casual, you, a leather daddy. Yeah. So that was a journey.

And then when COVID happened, they went, like, consulting had always been work from home friendly. Right. I love consulting. I love working from home. Oh, man, just not having a separation between home and work. Graham, give me a little bit of consulting work. What we're doing here today, and thank you for joining us, by the way. No, I mean, hire me.

Oh, okay. Ask me my opinion. Dave, what would you say your opinion is on consulting work? Smash. You've got the youthful spirit that we're looking for here around Acme. So you, this obviously was done over a period of years, all these tattoos. Yeah. And then, like, the back one is the most recent.

That's still, like, work in progress. Was that all one design? One design, but, like, over a number of sessions. Sure. So, like, probably three. What I like to do, I like to do get competing tattoo artists that, like, scratch, at each other stuff and then we can actually

Yeah, they're like graffiti artists Fuck this guy. Poi. They just put a sticker on your back. So when pandemic happened, like I had no tattoos on my hands, which was good because I can, you know,

sometimes I would go work for like the banks and stuff like that. Like meet people that don't like tattoos. They'd send security immediately. How did you get in here? I made fun of my earring on like my second or third week at the job. Yo, ho jolly Roger.

Get a load of this guy. And he's not a junior guy who's the C, oh, I'll name him, he was the CIO of MetroLinks. And he goes, what's this thing? An earring. My ear is the first time I met him. It's 20, my God, what's this thing? No, this was, I mean, to be fair, that was probably 2015. Have you seen the Mark Wahlberg movie Rockstar?

Uh, yeah. It's great. Is that stand up and shout? Is that the one where you think, yeah, yeah. Get up and shout! And it was based on a real thing, right? Yeah, no, Judas Priest? One of those, yeah.

And those two bands I get, I will never know the difference. Jesus Priest and Iron Raiden. And he, there's a scene where he is, he's in this cover band at night, but in the daytime he works repairing photocopiers. How do we get from earring to this? Because he's in a corporate environment. He's at an office, he's fixing someone's photocopier, and then. Uh, his, uh, eye makeup is, uh, is, uh, smudged. And the guy says, are you wearing eye makeup? And he says, I'm in a band.

I thought it would have been better than why I said. And then it's really good. It's a really good movie. Um, McNulty is in the band from the wire. Oh, fun. Yeah, yeah. A Brit. And, uh, they're all Brits. Oh, Brett. And then Jennifer Aniston's in it. The scene where he auditions is awesome. I saw it in the theater You know, it's Sounds like you've seen it a few times Yeah, yeah, it sounds like Did you just watch it this week?

It's like at sort of like minute 26 Is when it all falls apart Then he joins the band And then they're like Hey, you've got the stuff He's got to be tough in all their promo shots But he can't stop smiling Because he loves being in this band

And in the band that he quit Now Connor, what is your opinion of Rockstar Now that you've heard He gets kicked out of the cover band And they replace it with the lead singer of third-eye blind Now, how do you feel about the story? I feel like I have to see it Yeah

So my next step's going to be like Check it out Rockstar It kind of falls a part of the end It's not a great Like full movie So just watch it to the two-thirds And then turn it off Maybe I can borrow Dave's copy

Now you're in town You have families here So you come often But this is specifically for a particular project Yes? Yeah, yeah, so maybe, well, I mean, it goes back to when I was doing that work at Okad, where I did my grad work. Future studies. Yeah.

So, do you think we'll have food and pills? This is the exact. This is what the whole show is all about. Love this. It's about figuring out the future. So I went, you know, when I was in, when I was in grad school, for my thesis project. What was your undergrad? English literature.

All right. I barely finished it. I failed out twice. And then I finally graduated after seven years And I was like, I'm never going to school again. What was your favorite? What was your favorite English book? I didn't read any of them.

Mary Poppins. I had to read Shakespeare a bunch. And I feel like I did literally did the like Coles notes, skim read. Now with AI, you can look at it. You can put in your own codes. There's no point. It's like there's no point in getting an English letter or degree anymore. So you're talking about future stuff.

Talking about futures. I did, so for the thesis, which usually people use... Future sex love sounds. Yeah, it was an audio exploration of the future of the sounds that I make when I make love. So, yeah, it was all about the future, and then, you know, everyone usually does for their kind of graduate project. They'll do it on something that's, you know, more serious. And I think intended to be something of a calling card will help them get a job after. And I was stuck.

on this comedy show. Okay. There's a, I just love bringing together, like I have so much value in what I did in the comedy world. I didn't want to be one of those people that were like, okay, now I'm done with that.

I'm never going to go revisit it. Right. So a lot of my work has been trying to incorporate comedy and the foresight and now like the consulting into something that kind of is cohesive. So like, uh, when are we going to have food and bell terms? Food and Bill?

Food and Bill and Pill Farm, yeah. That's coming. That's coming. There are definite, like, I mean, I feel like that started with the beyond meat kind of situation. Oh, sure. That's the start of that conversation. Also, that's soylent stuff, everybody who's going to know that. I felt like that was like, okay, here we go. It's just going to be a powder.

We're just getting nutrition into our bodies. Exactly. Who cares out enjoying food? Snowpiercer was another one, right? Another kind of weird food mash thing. Yeah. Did you see Mickey 17? No.

It's really good. Edward. Mark Wahlher has an ear. And his eye makeup is smushed. And then the bass player or the drum player. But like, so what? Because like one thing I went to at a museum once was like, what if Canada's warm in the future? Yeah.

Love it. Like, what does that mean to our collective identity? If there's no snow here, if it's just warm here. Yeah. I was like, brilliant. If it's warm here? Hell yeah. I'm hitting the beach.

That's about it. For me, the show is about bringing that energy, which is, like, there are experts out there that know a lot about a certain topic. Sure. And then combining it with, like, fun weirdos and characters and sketches that can make it more entertaining than just kind of going and watching a straight-ahead lecture. Yeah. So the show is all about bringing together domain experts with people who are funny. We put them on a panel. And then I moderate a panel where everybody talks about.

about what their vision is of the future. Do they think, does one side think it's all serious and the other side thinks it's all sketch and then you're going to mix them together? I'm not trying to do any rug pulls. Like, there's a few games in there that we haven't told people about that I think will cause some surprise and, like, nice little moments. But mostly it's, like, that's why I think the panel format works so well. Like, you can interact with the other people on the panel if you want.

Yeah. You could equally just, like, share your view. And then the audience benefits from that, or they benefit from the chaos that kind of exists between everybody. Have you thought of adding to the panel a guy who's not really paying attention and is currently thinking about the Mark Wahlberg movie Rockstar? This is good. This is keep going.

Keep going. Can I tell you my favorite? Because you used to do a lot of sketch. Yeah. And one of my favorite sketches, it was a solo sketch where you spent the entire first four or five minutes stacking boxes and like making this intricate set and then at the very end just falling into them and knocking them over. That was also one of my favorite sketches.

I was remembering a video sketch that was, I don't even know what it was. Was it about physical comedy? Yes. And it was you falling over a bunch. Yeah. And at one point you said you had been up all night doing GHP. Yeah. Yeah, that was a bit of, that was realism kind of sneaking into the script there.

Yeah, I mean, that's funny. They were both, both of those bits were hugely physical. The first one, you're talking about it, I did at Cafe Malmartra. Yeah. And it was, I had to bring in like IKEA bookshelf. and I had garbage bags filled with old cans and then I do

I had no prep no pre-planning for how I was going to rig these things so like live on stage tying up these bookcases in like an intricate spider web and stacking up all the the cans

and then as Graham said you know go to say the first word and fall on the chair and the whole thing collapsed on top of me in like a tiny theater it's like you know 15 feet across

it was like a huge had that been on YouTube early. It would be one of the all-time great. Yeah, you could have been Lonely Girl 15. Yeah. I wish I was Lonely Girl 15. What's the history of dance guy? Oh, History of Dance? Yeah, remember him. Yeah. Do you think he's still doing that

corporately? It's still going around doing the dance. Oh, yeah, was his t-shirt tucked in? Man, I loved early YouTube. Yeah, it had a... Who else was on? I love that. I was in the stuff before YouTube. The stuff when you would just get like an email of like, check out this guy doing this sort of weird strobe effect in a breakdancing competition.

Yeah, yeah. Was it woman stomping grapes like the first, like everybody saw it? And it was, where she is? She still didn't corporate work. You're so obsessed with the corporates. Winnebago man, you remember him? Yes, yes, absolutely. It's just that, like, yeah, that would have been 20, 20 years ago.

Yeah. To longer ago. When did YouTube, like, kick off? I think it was like 2000. My guess is 2000. 2006 or 2007. I've heard like... I've always heard that, like,

like that SNL, the Chronicles of Narnia thing was the thing that, like, because it got shared on YouTube, that's why YouTube got big. Oh, that someone else was telling me it was like sports highlights or something. I didn't know the Chronicles of Narnia. What is the Chronicles of Narnia? It was Andy Samburg doing a rap about trying to see the Chronicles of Narnia. Yeah, he used to do those raps. Those were funny.

I mean, yeah. But, like, uh, now, you know, I don't even know what would be the most popular. It's probably some. Most popular thing,

like, like most viewed on YouTube. Ever? Yeah. Cy. Yeah. That was the first to a billion. Yeah.

Yeah. I'd say that's a good, that's a good guess is any. I'm going, I'm looking it up. Okay. Most viewed YouTube videos. Any guesses?

Um, I'm going to guess it's just like, it's just something that I've never heard of like a day at the zoo Yeah I'm guessing there's like a As a father I've seen a lot of these like Johnny Johnny

Yes Papa Oh yeah I've seen some of those Or Masha and the Bear What do you think it is? What's your guess? I think that Dave's on the right track I mean there's one of the things I notice About modern YouTube now with my daughter is she'll get into these like rabbit holes

of like kids content but it's all gray market you've seen this stuff it's usually like Eastern European hands that are like playing with like Peppa Pig dolls yes oh but the Peppa Pig's dad sounds like oh well pipa you know like it's just like

whoa and they're racked up and they've got these Eastern European hands that are like so bony love to all the Eastern Europeans by the way my wife is Polish Polish like Polish kid, Polish born?

Polish born. Wow. We had to do a, my daughter had to do a thing for her class of like your family's immigration story. And so we were looking into our Polish Ukrainian past. Oh, really? What did you find? They came in 1897.

Okay. To Manitoba. They were given 160 acres because in Sift in Manitoba. And the minister of interior was named Sifton, so the town is named after him. Nice. But the area was not cleared. Like, they needed people to come farm the land, but the land was not farmable. Oh, it was just like trees and.

Yeah. So they had, they spent years before they had food they could grow. Oh, shit. Okay. Most watch of all time. Yes. Most of all time is baby shark. All it's kids content

Yeah 16 billion views Followed by Despacito Followed by Two Cocoa Mellon videos And then Johnny Johnny

Johnny Yes Papa by Lulu Oh shit really That was that fifth That's Fiff Then See You Again by Wiz Khalifa Is that from Fast and Furious Yes it was

Phonic song with two words By Choo TV Nursery Cocoa Mellon Lulu kids Choo Choo Kids, Then Shape of You by Ed Shearin, Gangnam Style by Sye, and Uptown Funk. Where's an Eastern European Peppa Pig figure on that list? Masha and the Bear Recipe for Disaster is 15th. These are great.

There was also, my kids used to watch these people who had these Anna and Elsa Frozen dolls. Oh yeah, that's big in my house. But they, I guess they are like trying to avoid copyright because they keep calling them Ania and Elcia. Oh, yeah, that's, like, big on my house. And it's like, and it's one of those things. It's like weirdly gray market and feels wrong. It feels child exploitative. For myself, what is gray market to mean?

Gray market's like kind of illegal, but not technically illegal. Like they're taking, have a pig is owned by some. Is this illegal? Is this pink pantherous? I don't know. So it's not, it's legal. but it's barely legal it looks like the magazine

something different Dave that's something very that is illegal yeah so my daughter is watching these barely legal videos no I yeah Gray Market is like yeah it's like

I hear it in terms of like I've heard it referred to in terms of like reselling something I'm not an official you know dealer of this brand but I bought it and I can sell it and you can't stop me

it would be like it's also in those circumstances, it's like copyright infringement, right? Like they're taking the Peppa Pig thing and they're making their own Peppa Pig world and making money from it, but they're not official Peppa Pig. That's so weird. Oh, learning huge. Number 12 is learning colors, colorful eggs on a farm. I'm sure I've seen that. But it's all kid stuff, right?

Yeah. With the exception of a couple of Latin hits. Yeah. Waka Waka this time for Africa. by Shakira. Okay. Oh, this time forever. Okay. I think that was,

that came out during the Olympics. Or no, World Cup when it was in Africa. And it was Waka, Waka also Fuzzy Bear was. He produced it. Shakira and Fossey Bear did a lab. Yeah.

So, yeah, you, both of you guys have kids that, like, are kind of always on YouTube and watching, watching. Yeah, like 23 hours in it. But, like, you guys must keep track of what they're watching. And what is it?

Like, I don't, I feel like I don't understand any of them. Right now, my daughters really like watching other people play Roblox. Okay. Okay. And that's fine. Sure. And they also like playing Roblox themselves. That's fine.

And it's going to be great when you're, when Roblox rolls around, you're going to love it. What is your, what is your daughter watching? She's like all Ania and Elsia. Really? That's the main. jam on our house right now. And we try to limit it because I feel like every time I look over and it's just some weird independently produced YouTube thing, I'm like, oh, that's a little too much. I know. I'm like, I'm okay with screen time, but could you watch something with a

plot? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm always trying to like watch a movie. Yeah. Like I can keep, let's build some attention capacity. Oh, that'll be a punishment for kids in the future. You're sitting down and you're watching Gone Girl. Okay. Good, good. Early lessons. Yeah. Collegula. You're watching the usual suspects, and I'm spoiling it for you.

That's, yeah, it's a world I can't, because I don't get, although, but when I was a kid, I'd watch somebody play a video game for hours and hours, so it's not that different of. But you'd be in the room with them. That's true. And you wanted to play it, and they wouldn't let you. That's right. You never got to turn. What games were you watching?

The big one was like when I was an early teen was Golden Eye. Okay, yeah, yeah. The James Bond catalog. And then Twisted Metal was one that like, yeah, we were obsessed with Twisted. And of course, your Mortal Kombat, your street fighters. So Vancouver just got a women's hockey team. Woo! Okay.

And the team is called The Golden Eyes. Okay. And I think it is a reference to a bird. I know there's one in Antitoba to. it's the golden eyes and it's a fish. But in the arena, they play the like... Well, the like pause music

from Goldenhine that has the like Kshh. Golden Knight was massive. It wasn't the first person shooter out there. It's just for whatever reason. It was the first one on maybe like main console.

Main console. And it was the first game, like it was the only game where you could be Alan coming. That was driving the success Yeah God I miss Alan coming He's going to be in the new X-Men movie He hosts the traitors

Nice Do you So this is your first time on stage in a while Yeah I mean last time I did I did like a stage rendition of Future Proof Which is a show that I'm here to produce Back in 2017 In Toronto, we did three shows where I, you know, similarly played a host-type role,

but there was less on my shoulders. That was more setting up, you know, interviewing the expert. I worked with some improvisers to, like, set up some scenes. And then are you nervous about going back to stage? Yeah, for sure. I'm super nervous. What are you going to wear? I'm going to wear a suit.

I'm going to wear a suit. Okay. Some kind of vaguely, I mean, the whole theme of the show is very inspired by Jerry Sprigg. 90s. So that kind of aesthetic and the suits. He would wear like a double breast. He would wear a double breast. He would wear a double breast shirt on ice.

I got some glasses. I toyed briefly with the idea of going Full Springer and got a wig, which I decided against because bald is kind of more future, I think. Yeah. Bald is the future. It's sleek. Sleak. What happens when you eat your food in pill format?

There's... You know what I'm willing to live With the side of Yeah Although now I feel like Hair plugs are the future People are going

We're a little obsessed Aren't we Yeah It comes up a lot And I think I thought Once years ago That in the future

Like people will want more hair So they'd be like Have it implanted on their face Like the dog face boy From the carnival That would become a look So anyways, take that, use that as much as you want. Thank you, I will.

We had Abdul last week. We should do Bald Month. Oh, yeah. Bald Month is fun. I love that. I've always wanted to go to an all-bald party. Next week is John Cryer. Is he bald?

Yeah. Nice. Most of the time he was on two enough men. He was wearing wig and they said they like had a team that had to build his air every week. Wow. Okay. I mean, we should all be so lucky, you know. But you guys, so you're not worried about it.

You're not bald. bald remedies or not. I'm so worried about it. But you've got like, that's, that's a full head up there. Oh, it's all fake. Oh, good for you. Well, your team is doing great work. I got criers guys. And Graham's a hat man. I'm a hat man. But I go like, I'm up here. You know what I mean? I got this little tuft and that's it. But you're baking up for it, right? Yeah. And then I'm just kind of folded up on my face like a dog face. Yeah. Here's what I want to say with the future. I do a comb over with my beard. Yeah. Well, that's great.

It is great. It's exciting how to be back on the podcast. Something came up and I had a, I guess, all bald party. That sounds fun. That does sound fun. Have you seen pictures of that, I've only seen, it's like an art piece of like same height party. Yes, yeah. Where everyone, if you're short, you have to wear a platform thing.

Oh, fun. And everyone ends up being the same height. I think that's great, but it's more inclusive than I want the all bald party to be. Yeah, you want it to be exclusive. I want all balds. So if you shave, if you shave your hair, you can come in. If not, maybe we can do like bald caps, but they got to be really good. Yeah.

Maybe we can do bald caps. Bald. Yeah, we got to be really good. Well, I don't want to see them. There's nothing like a poorly applied bald cap. They insult me to my fucking core. Do they have to have, can they be bald but like have natural growth on the ring on the side? Yeah, yeah.

So what about a Klingon? He's got you there? Can Wharf come? He does. Worf can come. I love Worf. Worf has come up more so than any other Star Trek character over the years. Worf has reappeared in my algorithm.

What? No surprise. In your actual algorithm or in your life? In my real algorithm. It's usually there's a clip of him talking about playing soccer when he killed a kid. And I follow one of those accounts that just reposts him telling that story. Over and over, yeah. I love those accounts that are just like the same clip every day.

And the, like, the caption will be Day 802. Yeah, that's right. That's right. What, can you tell us this story about Wharf? About Wharf? I think it was basically. Also, are you a Star Trek person in general? I'm a Star Trek.

I'm a Star Trek T and G person. I wouldn't put myself. Grim, Grim, Grim, the next generation. What? That doesn't even make sense to me. So I watched it a lot. It's like, it was one of those things. things that I think as a kid, you come home from school and it was like one of the shows

that's like, you know, 5 p.m. or 4 p.m. Yeah, yeah. You know, CBC or something or... Totally. Um, so I got a lot of viewing time then and it, like, cemented in my brain. What age? TNG probably started... I'll probably get this wrong, but like... Well, I just mean for you. Yeah. Eight to like... Okay. Eight to maybe 15. Great. And then like casually after that, you know what I mean? Because it was so nostalgic. Like, I love TNG. I got into Deep Space 9

for a second, just because it, you know, was on the tails of TNG when it shut down. Graham's like, I don't know what you guys are talking about. Yeah, exactly. This is stuff that would get, score you with all sorts of people, men, women, all these people, non-stop sex. The only thing you'd be

doing is what, the only break you would have to watch more Star Trek to re-energots. Past guest, Ryan Beale is a huge fan. Oh, really? Of, not of you, of Star Trek, the next generation. And the one thing he points out is like, what if it's like, what if a spaceship had wall to wall carpet?

That's funny. Okay, so tell us this Wharf story. Yeah. The wharf story, I mean, I don't know if I'll do it justice with my paraphrase, but it's basically Wharf. Warf is a Klingon? He's a guy. What is a Klingon?

He's got a guy with big crab forehead. His forehead is that. Predator? He sort of looks like predator. Okay, he's predator. He's got in your ink on. right? What's this?

Jean-Luc Picard comes up to him. What are you doing here? Not on my ship. And he's like the tallest guy. He's super tall. He's super strong. He's a security officer on the ship.

Clingons are warlike people. Yes. They like to fight. They have like very barbaric kind of weapons. But Worf's like got a softer side, right? He's part of the Federation. He can relate and, you know, is committed to that. And he's having a moment with

uh you know someone else on the ship and he's like very calmly and kind of tragically explaining this memory he has of being a child and playing soccer on the soccer pitch and you know i was running down the pitch and it's not another sport it's actual soccer it was actual soccer and he's like i'm and i'm running down and someone's chasing me and you know and the ball was kicked up in the air and we both jumped for it at the same time and i you know head butted the ball down the field but i did not feel the other boy collide with me. I looked down. I realized he was dead.

I had killed him. I knew it was coming and it's still going to enjoy it. He gives a whole, like it's like two minutes a preamble about playing soccer and then he just drops the hammer by killing his job. That's his Emmy clip. Now, I never watched the show, but I know that there's like, it's just not my thing. Okay. But I know that there's like, the captain is, you can go to your bald party, for sure. Definitely.

The, there is a boy named Wesley Crusher. Yeah. His mother is Beverly Crusher. She's a doctor. Oh, yeah. Yeah. There's Deanna Troy. This does.

You're undercutting your argument here, so you never seen it. And she is a, she's known as counselor Troy. That's right. Is she, do people do therapy? Is she like that kind of counselor? It's never clear. I feel like she reminds me of one of those people that say I am an empath. I feel like that is her ability.

You know what I mean? It's not like, Wharf is in his session being like, I just have this repressed memory about it. I don't think so. I hope so. I mean, so there's also Whoopi Goldberg. Yeah, who is a kind of.

Is she a bartender? Bartender, but like spiritual guide as well. Her name's Geinen. That's right. Why do I know? Yeah, why do you know all this? I've watched the show and I don't know. Do you know where Geinin worked?

At the bar. Do you know what the bar was called? Cheers. Whoopi Goldberg. She worked at the bar, which was called, don't tell me, comic relief. It was 10-forward. 10-forward. And then was the guy, he was a Ferengi.

Did he also, it was that Deep Space Nine? That's Deep Space Nine, yeah. I can't remember his name. Oh, I can't remember his name, Quark. Quark. Yeah. And he was a salty character. And he drove a orangutostarosa.

Yep. All around the ship, they hated it. And also, data. There was also data. Data's big, yeah. Yeah. Datter. That's what they're going to call him.

Get over here, data. The thing was that always fascinated me was the holodeck. As you could go into a whole world in the past. I feel like he was Sherlock Holmes. Oh, yes. Sherlock Holmes in there, for sure. They're a baseball. episode, they go back and play old-timey baseball.

I bet. It's also like the one, I mean, this is part of why I love the future and Star Trek and all those other things, it's things like Star Trek really form the material for people to imagine what the future does look like. Right. So when you see things like creation of the holodeck that's in fiction, that drives a whole bunch of people to be like, oh, that's a thing. Maybe that's what entertainment should look like, you know, for better or for worse.

But now people do that. They're building the holodeck. And porno people are going to be right there at the forefront. And I will be first in love to fuck data on the holiday. In a glory hole. It's a glory hole situation. Data's on the other side. I assume it's data.

I'll never know for sure. Wharf's killing a kid in the corner. That's very specific fantasy. Data is a robot, borg, cyborg man. That's right. Is he part human? Does he want to be a human? I think he does want to be human, yeah.

That's a big kind of arc for his character over the series. What is emotion? That's something that in the legislature, you put it forward? It's pronounced Emotion, and it's Carly Ray Jepson's second album. We're thinking ahead. We're thinking into the future here. Dave, what's going on with you? Well, speaking of the future.

Oh, God. This past weekend, I did something very futuristic. Okay. Um, my, uh, Abby's parents were in town and it was rainy day and we were looking for something to do. And we went to the planetarium. Okay. The most futuristic building of the world. Local planetarium.

The local planetarium. Um, when was the last time you were at planetarium? Uh, probably in 1998 I went to, no, wait. We did a live show there. We did a live show at the planetarium, uh, on the ceiling. That's right. And by the way, they're bringing back. Laser Zeppelin and Laser Floyd.

About time. I feel like that's all I know about the planet's And laser gorillas. Really? Yeah. Hey, do you think that it would be like Taylor Swift or something like that? But maybe are people over her? Is she done?

Taylor Swift? Are we on to somebody else now? She is an institution at this point. I don't think she's done. Yeah. She'll just be. Yeah, I bet it is. I bet it's they already had the lasers set up for Pink Floyd.

Dust off this old. classic and, you know, we get the lasers going again. Well, they didn't do it for many years. Yeah, because I remember them saying that there was a guy who programmed it and he left and maybe took the program with him. Really? I believe they, I met his son. Did you really?

Yeah. Maybe he was a listener. Yeah, that's weird. But check it out. Yep. It gets back. But I think in 1998, I went to Laser Modern Rock and I saw like, like a green day time of your life on the ceiling.

Nice. But before that, I feel like I went with my class many times. Yes. Yeah, that's my memory of it. And now that I have kids and they go on field trips, it hasn't come up once. Yeah, it's, I always forget that we have it until somebody says they went to it. Because there's also a museum, right, in the bottom of it, the museum of Vancouver. Yeah, the Museum of Vancouver.

is in the same building. And, but there's also a museum, like the planetarium is a, everyone remembers the theater because you look at the ceiling and they play a movie. Dumb and dumber. Circle Edition. Collegula. But there's also like a little kind of interactive gallery where you can, you know, put on a space suit and, you know, control.

the Mars rover I feel like I have one other memory from that space don't they have like a little kind of old timey like telescope room

you know I'm talking about it's like almost like a building off of the main building Oh yeah yeah yeah there's an observatory yeah that's what it's called but I don't know yeah I don't know

if you can access that or if that's just for yeah actual science yeah okay I picture it either scientists are using it or at night a security guard

is sleeping and he's paying attention to it. You can go in there and look at whatever you want it. And then he misses out on the big discovery. That's true. The comet flies. So we went and you go and you buy a ticket for a show. And there's a show every hour.

And when I was a kid, they had this big thing that was, it had a name, but it was like this big apparatus that rose up out of the center and projected things onto the ceiling. And that's old technology. Now they just have a computer. Because I remember we wanted to, because it lifted up. You wanted to have sex with it. Yeah.

And I said, can you guys turn a blind eye? It looks like a big metal bug. But we asked if we could ascend with the stage. And then they were like, yeah, no problem. Then they're like, the stage doesn't work anymore. Oh. Yeah, the last minute. Oh, well.

And so the, I wish I'd known, like, what's the go-to movie to watch? because, like, they just have a rotation of movies every hour. And the one we saw was about telescopes in Peru. No, Chile. Okay. Because they have, like, a big collection of telescopes there because of the climate is so good. Sure.

So good for. And that's where astronomers don't want to be up north. They want to be somewhere hot. It's warm. Yeah. Well, it's on a mountain. It's in the Andes. So it's not that hot.

But they, like, and it would show sort of like, here's how it works. And you get to see inside these telescopes, which I'm sure is fascinating. But then you see space and you're like, that's actually what I want to see. Yeah. This telescope can see that this other solar system is all crooked. Yeah, why wouldn't they just do that all the time? You know what I mean? You're in like a bubble room that seems designed to be immersed you in space.

Yeah. Why put a 2D image of another telescope on land on the same screen? I mean, it's not breaking all the rules. Honestly, if the movie I saw had been, you know, 80, 20 space and then telescope instead of 2080, I would be singing a different tune. Yeah. And then after the, after the movie plays, there's a, I guess a licensed astronomer who comes on and says, here are the stars you can see in the sky tonight. Here's Orion's belt.

Check out. He's got his pants are falling down. I'm just kidding, everybody. That's a Toronto joke. Check out this dipper over here. This is the big one. But, and then there's also like a place. I didn't see a schedule, so I didn't know when to go in, but a guy giving demonstrations.

Yeah. Of like science. The dipper. Yeah. Dippers. of various sizes. It also reminds me of whenever I think about the planetarium,

I think about in Jurassic Park. You know when they go to like show them the, they put them in these seats and the thing comes down. There's a screen that's like, here's what the scientists are doing behind the, behind the walls. And they get out and they're like, just let me see. Just let me see.

It's like on the cusp of, it's trying so hard to make it relevant, but it is, at its core, just so educational. Do you know what I mean? Right. Instead of just being interesting of fun. Did you love Jurassic Park? I had my first crush on a real girl was on Lex from Jurassic Park.

Lex is the child. Yes, and I should say that I watched the movie when I was 12 years old. Not as a man. What is, did you see it in the theater? I think so. Okay. I mean, I don't have a specific man. memory, but that would, like, I was Jurassic Park nuts.

Like, I have a bunch of toys. I'm a little older than you, I think. But I also saw it when I was 12 in the theater. And I was like, I feel like I had just graduated from dinosaurs. Okay. With a diploma. I was, I had moved on to my next fascination, which was screech, I guess. It's all the same era, right?

I can save other bells in the next time. But I revisited it as an adult, and it's so good. Really? Yeah. Well, everything was all animatronic and shit before. I just mean that as like film making. Yeah, it's a great movie. It's the first hour is kind of nothing happens.

Like you see the dinosaurs, but they're very peaceful. Yep. They root around into tries. They just set all the expectations for the rest of the movie. You said that was your first crush on your first, your first crush on a real girl. That's correct What were your... The previous two crushes?

Yeah. Jubilee from X-Men The animated series. Oh, classic. Yeah, yeah. Which one's Jubilee? She's the like, she shoots sparks. Is she best friends with,

who's the guy with the cards? Gambit. Gambit. Is she, are they? Southern man? Are they the duo? I don't know. I feel like she's younger

than the rest of the crew. Yeah, she had like a plunky haircut. Yeah, she was edgy. She was edgy. I liked her a lot. Jubilee. X-man Animated

Get an eye full of this Everybody Oh, her, okay Yeah, she's a scorcher She has a yellow coat I wish, you know How many tattoos of her Do you have on your body?

And your other Non-Real crush? The first one, probably the same Maybe a little bit before this, was Gadget from Chippendale's Rescue Rangers Oh, yeah.

Oh, she was an animated mouse. Yeah. Just like broadly attracted to feminine energy, I guess is kind of the thing. The heart wants what it wants, you know? Yeah, exactly. Who animated? I guess I liked Lady Jane from G.I. Joe. Oh, yeah.

That's good. I think when I, the fictional character I had a crush on was, I think her name was Janice from the Muppet show band. Mm, with the big lips. A Muppet. Yeah. A Muppet. Wow, okay. See, the heart wants what the heart wants. Yeah, exactly, you know.

I love that. Lady Jay. Oh, Lady Jay. She's, uh, is that who I liked? Okay. Okay. A lot of this fan art is doing it justice. Be careful if you're at work.

Sure. That's not really scratching the itch. Maybe it was scarlet. And yours was Janice? Yeah, Janice from the, uh... I like that you went Muppet, Graham. Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem was the name of the band. You can see it, right?

Yeah. Yeah. She's pretty. Yeah, I like her eyes. Yeah. Um, and she talked like a surfer girl. That's cool. Because she's hip.

She's hip. She's hip. She's hip. It's part of the appeal. Just like Jubilee. Same. Jubilee was very. Yeah.

You have the big yellow trench coat. Gambit, another trench coat, another link. Well, no one liked Gambit. None of us had a crush on Gambit. We had one trench coat crush. Gambit, I mean, if I... I won't go there. Oh, yeah.

Come on go there. I mean... I would sleep with Gambit. Yeah, sure. Okay, sure, sure. Yeah, okay. Merry fuck, yeah. Gambit, Gambit, and Gambit.

Gambit. Lady J. Was it? Yeah, yeah, I take her, let's just do X-Men. Okay, so Gambit, Wolverine, and Professor X. Oh, interesting. And he can go to your party. Yeah, be the guest of honor.

So it's Professor X, Gambit, and Wolverine. I'm going to go, I think you got to fuck Gambit. Yeah. Because he's smooth. Yeah, he's got that twang. This is so easy. I don't know. I think I've got a different take, but go on.

You're going to kill. Wolverine and marry Professor X. It's so wise. And a couple of bald bros going around town. That ain't bad look. And you're not marrying Wolverine. Wolverine. He's going to beat you.

But I would marry Professor X because during sex, then he could project me into all sorts of. Oh, you don't get to fuck. You don't get to fuck who you marry. Oh, I meant fuck. Yeah, I fuck Xavier. You're going to fuck Xavier.

Yeah. And he is Xavier like in the in the fucking, right? He's not like projecting another face on. He can do projections. You could have sex with all of the X-Men through. So you're going to make him creative? Does he have to wear a helmet? I don't really remember.

He should wear a helmet. He wears a helmet. I only remember. I don't really remember much about it. Magneto has a helmet. But like to do the projecting, doesn't he? Yeah, he's got a thing that, yeah, focuses his. And does it drain him?

Oh, Graham does. Well, that. So Wolverine, though, he would be like, he never gets drained. No. No. Yeah. He's a stamina man. I mean, there's cases to go Wolverine as well.

But the violence, I feel like, that's what's going to get me. Yeah. I would kill him. He's no, no... And you're having sex and you never know, like, he doesn't control if those things come out. Yeah. Absolutely. Whoops.

Snicked. Oh, are you suggesting he has a sword in his penis as well? Yeah. He's going through a lot of things. Um, yeah, you know, uh, and then, yeah, you got, I'm going to marry, um, whatever his name is. Gambit. Yeah, we're going to marry Gambit. Okay.

And I feel like he's going to take, we're going to go down to the south of the bayou together. Is that fun for you? Well, he'll make it fun. You're allergic to shrimp. You don't have any crawfish. I'll have to skip the gumbo. Um, are you good at cards? Are you good at cards?

Bad, very bad. There goes. Another, another... You can teach me cards. Yeah, I could teach you cards. I was just looking at my notes I made for this episode, Planetarium. Also, this is episode 925. What a way to make a living.

Oh, nice. What's going on with you? I'm trying to, in general, expand my artistic horizons. Okay. As a consumer or a creator? Both. Okay. During the summer, I went to an intensive two-week puppet course.

Cool. I love that. Yeah. So I'm trying to absorb more of that kind of stuff. And your childhood crush was a puppet. Look, this line of questioning is out of order. The puppet needs a bigger mouth. Maybe slap some DSLs on though.

Yeah. And what are we lubricating our puppets with? Teacher, teacher. That's cool. Yeah. So in doing so, is there a holodeck I can go in? Well, I mean, that was the whole thing with the holodeck. It would be covered, right?

Wouldn't it just be absolutely wrecked? Black light in the holodeck? I mean, that's where your mind goes eventually. Yeah, okay. This is Klingon. I can tell. Oh, shit, we're fucking in Sherlock Holmes time. Yeah, that's all it is.

It's like, well, we're fucking, but it's Shakespeare. That's funny. So I went and saw a one... Kind of nasty episode. Yeah, well, you know, That's what people, they expect it from us, right? It's not that kind of show. It wasn't until now.

Writing your sexy questions. Yeah, which X-Men would you want to blow? I went and saw a one-person mime show. Okay. Which I've never done in my life before. I don't think I've ever seen any mime outside of making fun of mimes. Yeah, and a one-person mime show that referred to how many people were in the audience. Ah, there is.

you know there's like you see YouTube clips of like there's a pretty good Mime at Marine Land who like does tricks on people You see YouTube clips Well hey man we can't all see Whatever the hell you were seeing Okay

So how was the Mime show? Did it like did it change your mind As to what mimes can do? Yeah it was great Okay It was great and it was like At one point I was like I'm not following what is what is being a mime

here. Oh, okay. But by and large, it was funny, and there was, like I say, there was a point where I was like, is she a bird or is she on the back of a bird or is it, is she observing the bird? And you can't, you can't ask. Yeah, no. No question.

I know it's bird related. Yeah. And then after the show. Because they're playing that song. Have you heard the bird is the word the whole time? I'm like a bird. Because it's Canadian content. So, yeah.

And yeah, I enjoyed it And it was across the board I was just happened to be there was past guest Katie L. Humphreys And I went with past guest Mark Chavez Because he's a real culture vultry He's always at the theater That's a bird

Yeah, absolutely But yeah, I enjoyed the hell out of it And so I'm like, and what else? What's next? What should I go? I'm dipping in puppets, I'm dipping in mime. Mimes were a big like a punchline.

Yes. Like in the 80s. I feel like it was very like French people love Jerry Lewis and they love mimes and we hate the French. Yeah, I think it was kind of the general vibe. What else was there

that it was we hate mimes. Men love the three stooges and women can't get on board with it. Which is probably true to this day. I mean, who's into this three stooges? Yeah.

one alive is. Yeah. I don't think. They were a kind of thing that would come on TV on like a Saturday afternoon and I would be like, No, sir. Yeah. Couldn't do it.

But I do like the Marx line, which is, they three, oh, those are three stooges. They're the Marx Brothers. They're the Marx Brothers. Yeah. But they put them in the same category of like old comedy that like I don't watch very well. Yeah. Like how I appreciate a team.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. I, uh, I, okay watching like silent like slapstick stuff. Okay. The stuff I can't get into is where it was kind of the early days where everybody's projecting like it's a theater. Yes. And it's like too much. It's too much.

And it doesn't seem like real people. It's like vaudeville kind of vibe. Yeah. Yeah. I could never get into that. It's kind of I think that the 60s was where that slowed down. And then I was like, okay, this is how people actually talk. Yeah.

Yeah. How long was the mime show? Was one hour. That's a lot of mine. It was a lot of mine. I'm not tipping at all. I'm full cannonball. Have you, have you?

seen anything anywhere close to that? I mean, I think like mascots are pretty good mimes. They'll do a routine. A couple times I've seen Cirque du Soleil, there's usually a clown doing something physical and visual. And is it fun? Or are you like, I don't care for this, this part of the show? It's all good. You know, the Quebec, they do things best. That's true. Smoked meat. Eat, yep, bagels.

Poutine. Coming up the rear, mimes. The big three. Yeah, of course, Cirque d'O.A. would have, have you seen anything like that? Anything with mimes? I don't think so. Or mascots.

Mascots are also funny mind. Immediately to mascots. It's valid. We're thinking silent comedian types. And, you know, it's a crossover between mime and puppet as the mascot. Oh, sure. Maybe that's what I should get into. I've seen some puppet shows recently, but they're speaking puppets.

What do you see? There's these guys that do this, like, kids show in Toronto, do it every month. I can't remember the name of it. But they're all, like, weird musician kind of comedy types. Oh, okay. And they make these puppets and kind of play songs. There was a full mascot there, a guy in a dinosaur costume with, like, a homemade felt guitar. So it's like very, it's like, it's like DIY Sesame Street, you know, made by, like, artists and comedians.

It's great. It was super fun. And it's for, it's a kid's show. It's a kid's show. But it's also, it's produced, like it's been produced by artists who make puppets. Right. So it's like absolute chaos and like stuff's breaking down in the middle of the show. And no one's upset about it.

It's just kind of go with the flow. It's an insanity show. Yeah. But, uh, but still a lot of fun and just cool to see big set pieces and people in big costumes. Yeah. It's cool. Yeah. Yeah.

Like, um, like, um, like a soft guar. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's the vibe. Oh, I love that. That's the vibe.

Soft choir, that's perfect. Well, we watched all of the Mr. Bean episodes for the show and check them out in your bonus content, listeners. We're the kings. We're the kings of bonus content. And I was expecting that to be more mimy. But he does talk. He does. Yeah, he talks.

There's no episode. Doesn't he just humble? No, he says full words. I had a chart of how many words he says. I think in the series he says about 156 words. Interesting. And he does not. pretending things or other things.

He has a phone. So I guess he's miming physicality, maybe? I don't know. Oh, yeah, you can't just have him miming for a half hour. But he has speech issues. Yeah, I think he's got like, um, he's got something going on. He's definitely, I mean, I'm not, I can't diagnose the guy, but it's something

right. Yeah, yeah. I think everything, that's pretty. That's pretty obvious, by the way, that he behaves. I'm just going to pull up my Mr. Beaton Church. Oh, like, Ron Agattson does an amazing mine thing where he's playing the drums. Okay. And it's just like it starts with a single beat and he like can do, it looks like he's a drum hit.

Cool. And that was like for maybe the Queen's Jubilee or something like that. Yeah. She was rolling in the aisles. She requested it, actually. Let's see. Okay. What's the total number of words?

I don't think I have it. But in one episode, and of course, episode seven, Merry Christmas, Mr. Bean, he says 127 words. One of which,

or two of which, Christmas sucks. Yep. So, Graham, are you going to do miming? Or this is more about culture consumption?

I think that I lack the very core physicality to do anything mime-like, because this performer was like, Your physio told you you can't mind. She told me I could barely move my hips, so it's... Your physio is Shakira, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. She said, waka, walka, walka. Your hips are lying to me right now. But, yeah, I was like, definitely, um, uh, it's, I cannot have sex with Wolverine either. You need to be... He'll tear those hips apart. Well, what about oral? Oh, he's got that cigar in his mouth.

Gross. Oh, yeah. You think he's blowing you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, Graham. I'm at the top in this situation. Oh, Graham. No, no, no, no.

Bottom for me, Wolverine. Bottom for me, Bub. That's funny. But, yeah, I wouldn't be able to pull it off. It's too, you have to pretend. And, like, she did a couple of the classics, the wall, the rope, the stairs. Did you do wind? I guess.

No. Oh, but the wind is the big one. When you're a bird flying, I guess, though, there's a lot of wind. Wind resistance, yeah. Resistance, sure, yeah. But, yeah, I really enjoyed it. I don't know what I'm going to do next. I'm going to keep an eye out and see some other form of comedy that I would never otherwise check out.

Cool. I'm up for anybody who got any ideas, send in a message. I'll tell you some comedy you should check out. Tell me. Fricking a Midsummer Night's Dream. It's ridiculous. Twelfth Night. How about that?

I've been like to wind down at the end of the day. I watch El's Kitchen and Jeff Dunham was on an episode. The Ventricus, and he had his puppet with him at the dinner table. Was the puppet worry that it would be cooked because it's a jalapeno on a stick? It was his old man character. Oh, sure. He didn't enjoy being at the restaurant at all. There was no dead terrorist present.

I think that this would have been pre-dead terrorists, because this was like from 2005, 2006. Yeah, before terrorism. Yeah, I guess maybe, do you know of Jeff Dunham in his work? He's a puppet guy, right? Yeah, he's a ventriloquist. And then I'm reading between the lines, he maybe said something about terrorism? No, he has a puppet that's a terrorist. Who has exploded.

So he went a few steps beyond that. He's a terrorist who's now dead. Yeah. And I think his name is it, Ackman? the dead terrorist I'm guessing that right Ahmed is the dead terrorist Let's bring up a photo here

so Connor can see Yeah he's a skeleton With mean Oh wow Highbrows Choices were made that day And for him It's paid amazing dividends

Yeah and careers were made as well When What boy is there a year Can we put a year to Ahmed Yeah Because I've Like, he started, we were, he was on just for laughs, like the old thing with jalapino on a stick. And, yeah, he's doing characters that basically would be from the 15th.

Yeah, that's right. And he's still doing this. This is like still running. Yeah, yeah. He's, like, one of the top earning comedians in, like, North America. It was 2007 that we met Ahmed in, in his special spark of insanity. At the time, it was the ninth most watched YouTube. video of all time.

Wow, there you go. There you go. We've come a long way. One of the greats. And mostly because of kids. Kids really wanted to see it. Has there ever a ventriloquist duo where the, the puppet is setting the person up for all the laughs? Because I feel like the puppet always gets all the laughs.

The guy there is the, and it is a guy, make no mistake. Ventriloquist is very boys club. And the guy is a, he's like, uh, kind of like scolding the, yeah. No, you can't say that on a stick. But you want like a straight man puppet. Yeah. Yeah, the puppet's a straight man and the guy's a goofball. Yeah, the guy's all dressed crazy.

Well, who's going to top a puppet, I guess is a question? Who's got the energy? Well, who's going to top Wolverine? I know one guy. Get away here, bub. What about it? So in your puppet class, was ventriloquism separate from puppetry? I feel like maybe

A Popeteer's looked down on it as a Like as a populace Nobody's talking about them Whenever I was there And they like You know, they're hard to use Because they've got like eyebrows and eyes And you gotta do the

You gotta talk to the O in your lips Can you do that? Can I do that? Yeah. No Oh, okay No

But I mean it's not It's like He does it and he's not very good Right It's What are you talking about? Hey there Hey, hey there

Hey, okay, how's it going? I am there, you're a lot of ordinary general. See, no problem. Not bad at all. But yeah, no, I can't. But I've read, when I was a kid, I read a book about it. And all you have to do is say certain letters, like a D instead of a T, kind of like soft. And if you listen to the, him doing it, it's terrible.

Like, if you just hear an audio of it. I think it's D instead of a B. Like, because D and T, you don't close your mouth at all. Oh, yeah. D. So it's like, go into the daycarey. Daddy does delis.

So you're planning, you won't work ventriloquism into the puppet act. Oh, I'm not against it at all. I'm, yeah, I'm pro.

I think, I, you just won't be welcomed at the annual general meeting. Me or my puppet that comes in a trunk. Everywhere I go, he's in a trunk.

I told this story a couple years ago on the podcast that I went, and saw Carrot Top in Las Vegas. Yeah. And there's a guy called Terry Fader, who's like, the biggest ventriloquist in Las Vegas, got his own residency. And he was in the audience that night in Caritas. I was like, everybody, it's Terry Fader. And I turned around and he had the puppet on his hand, the ventriloquist puppet.

Don't leave home without him. He's always winking of people. Making the puppet wink, too. Yeah. I like a puppet in a little. Eventually, so they're both really skeevy. Yeah, we're a team. We saw you from across the bar.

Actually, neither of us is the straight man. Oh, man. Well, you guys want to move on to Overhirds? Okay. All right. Hello, this is Alden Ford. And Mujanzo Fagari. Two of the creators of Mission to Zix,

your favorite improvised obsessively sound design sci-fi sitcom here on the Max Fun Network. And the news is, we're back! With an all-new miniseries set in the Zix universe, the young old DIRF Chronicles. Well, DIRF, find his own killer before it's too late. To find out how that question could possibly make sense, well, you just have to tune in. Yeah, we're so excited that episode one is out right now in the Mission to Zix feed. So if you are looking for a little break from your own galaxy, we would love for you to check it out. That's the Young Old Durf Chronicles. Search Mission to Zix, Z-Y-X-X-E-Y-X-E.

your podcast app or on maximum fun.org. Keep it fresh. Hello internet. I'm your husband host, Travis McElroy. And I'm your wife host, Teresa McElroy. And this is a promo for schmanner's. It's extraordinary etiquette. Ordinary occasions.

Every week, we're going to tell you about a bit of culture, a bit of history, how etiquette still applies in the modern day, all that stuff. We also love to do biographies and histories of and, you know, You know, general procedurals, how to do etiquette in today's society. So, come check it out every Friday on Maximumfund.org or wherever you find your podcasts. Manor schmanners. Get it? Overheard.

Overheard. Boy, oh, boy, are we lucky to have a segment like this on the show. It's where you hear them, then we get to hear them. It's only fair that we start with the guest. Connor, do you have an overview? overheard. I do. Do you want the spicy one now or do you want the non-spicy one now?

We'll get non-spicy. We'll come back around and get spicy. Okay. Okay. So this would be a few years ago when I was working in consulting and I never see consulting people out of the office. Right. This is a rarity, right?

I'm in Meck and I'm standing in the... For people not from Canada, Mech is Mountain Equipment Co-O. That's right. That's like the REI in the U.S. Yeah. So I'm standing at like the return area, like I'm doing a typical return, doing an exchange thing. And then I see over my shoulder a guy who I work with from the office. And he's interacting with, you know, the service agent, you know, a line over.

He doesn't see me. And it starts off pretty bad because he's clearly angry and like one of those people who's like mean to the service people. Then I'm like, I can't take my eyes off this situation because I know him from the office. and he's just fucking unloading on this poor person behind the counter. And then he makes his request. He says, I need to talk to somebody who can tell me which backpack I can carry a bunch of fish around him. And the guy, like, he was already, you know, his hackles were already up.

He was, like, absolutely shocked. He's like, that is dangerous. There are bears. it's going to leak everywhere. This is not a waterproof backpack. He had like a doider. You know what I mean? No, a doider.

Just like a regular backpack and they're like, you're going to stuff this with ice and fish? That's so funny. So it was super weird. And then he did see me and then he kind of like regained his composure and came over and tried to smooth over the weirdness of like first yelling and then asking for maybe the weirdest request that I've ever heard. And you were staring the whole time.

Yeah. It's like, You expect to hear, like, some normal transaction, and he's carrying around a fucking bag of fish. So I was like, that is, like, like, I guess he's going fishing in the woods and wants to, or in the wilderness and wants to bring the fish out. Yeah. No, I mean, like, there's, there's a, there's a thought process there. But everyone behind the counter was like, you can't do that. But maybe he certainly can't do that using this bag.

It could be a back to school thing. He's buying a backpack for his son or daughter. And, uh, they're a fish monitor. No, my daughter is a bear And she wants to bring her lunch to school What would you do? Do you just eat it then and there? I think so, coolers, right?

Yeah, cooler. Like a cooler. Yeah. Do they make a cooler backpack? They don't make a cooler backpack than Jansport? They probably did, yeah. Well, he didn't want to pay you. That was the other thing that was super cheap about it.

I didn't want to spend a lot of money. Right. There's just a lot of, like, really deep insight into who this person really is beyond the, like, analyst who works on the corner desk. I wonder if he's, like, imagining himself catching so many fish, or if this has happened before, I didn't, couldn't get my fish away in time. Or getting burned again.

Yeah, I, yeah, you just, like, you can wear backpack coolers, like, theoretically. You didn't have one. I can tell you for a fact, it was just a school backpack. Yeah. It's a doiter. That's so funny. And I need something I can also put a binder in.

Yeah, it's in my laptop. I mean, it's got to have a laptop sleeve in there. Dave, do you haven't overheard? Yeah. Mine is from my favorite store, gourmet warehouse. Nice. And this is a chain in the States as well. Oh, I think it's just in Vancouver.

It's like kitchen goods. Kitchen goods and like cool. groceries. Yes. Yeah. Like, you know, you could go get a set of bowls, and you could also get some artisanal, um, like, uh, Gioza. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's, it's a lot of fun that place. Yeah, I like it a lot. I, my favorite store. Yeah. My favorite chips are there, Brett's. Brett's chips. Yeah. What's, what is distinguishes Brett's chips? Some of the other other, they're, I think they're European. Oh, okay. Say no wonder. Couldn't you tell by the name Brett?

And they have a lot of good cheese flavors. I prefer the Jura. Okay. They're kind of yellow. They're more yellow than other potatoes. They have like, what's the one that they love over there so much? It's like sour cream and chive or something like that. Oh, sure.

They have different names for everything. They call barbecue chips paprika. Prawn cocktail is the one that comes to mind. Sure. But anyway, I was at Gourmet Warehouse and there was a couple. Uh, yeah, I guess in their 50s, sure. That's necessary information. What race were they?

Um, they were the amazing race. And they had, uh, the guy was looking in the freezer section and he said, I'd buy meat pies if they had meat pies. And his wife goes, yeah, you don't eat enough of those. You think I don't know what you're doing in that man? The man cave is just a deep freeze filled with meat pies, single TV dinner tray. Now, in my mind, a meat pie is a single serving, or is it like... I think, yeah, you would buy him in the... You wouldn't buy, like, you can buy a chicken pot pie.

Right. Like a big, like, apple pie sized thing, but I think he's, you know, when you go to these stores, you buy an individual pie. Yeah. Yeah. There's a place on Granville Island here called the stock market And they make artisanal soups

And that's one that you can get like In a mug with the Oh yeah Like the pastry on top It's just I love meat pies Yeah They're a faith

Yeah they're delicious What is they generally Beef or? I think so like kind of stewed beef Yeah Carrots You know kind of I do a thing where I make a chicken pot pie

I make it like It's basically Soup that you make In a pan And then when you're done cooking it, you put a, like, a pie crust on top. Yeah. Put it in the oven. Yeah.

And is it, so I feel like the, in a chicken pot pie, is there, like, flour in there that makes the, like, sauce thicker or something? Yeah. Okay. I just wondering, just wanted to get, get up on that. But I know you're gluten-free, and maybe there's some other thickening agent you could do. Maybe tapioca flour. We'll see. We'll try it out.

You know, you use a chickpeas. Could chickpea flowers? Yeah, you could probably. I bet there's some great veggie options as well. All right. Well, I'm going to do it. I know what I'm doing for the rest of the week. The only thing that makes it not veggie for me is I do get a rotisserie chicken and...

Oh, do you really? Yeah, tear them all and put it in there. And I use chicken stock. And I guess, you know, if I'm being honest, I do have a sacrificial lamb. Do you ever with a rotisserie chicken, do you ever, like, at the end, put your hand inside of it and make it a puppet really quick? We're not all puppet people. We are. In a way, we all are.

Although, no, I do sometimes make my own on the barbecue with a beer can kind of device underneath it. And it's standing up. See, that's hilarious. And then when I take it off the barbecue, I show it to my kids and go make it do it a whole day. See, this is it. You are a puppeteer. There you go. That's the essence of puppetry.

Yeah. I believe this leg. And in an ass. The sledgehammer video has some animated, like, like. hairless chicken What would you call them? Featherless? Dead, I guess is the other word.

What's your overheard? My overheard is, I'm lucky that I take the train as much as I do, because that's almost where I get all my overheard. I love the train. I love it too. Hey, you know what I sometimes do these days?

I don't know. I go to Richmond on the, if I ever need something at a mall, there's, the Richmond Center is on the Canada line. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And also Lansdown and also Aberdeen. That's, do you, uh, did you take the train in from the airport?

Do you have somebody pick you up? My parents picked me up. Okay. But I've taken the Camby line from the airport straight down here. Isn't it amazing? Yeah, it's perfect. It's amazing. Um, but I was on the train and there was two ladies, uh, talking about their favorite, uh, country star.

They were talking about Candy Chesney. Okay. And, uh, she, they were like, yeah, he's just, he's so great. And then the other one said, but how about Garth Brooks and the other one said, I'd die for Garth Brooks. Oh, my God. If we're including Garth Brooks, then yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Good luck, Kenny Chesney. Apparently, he did a show. He booked the show in Edmonton. Kenny Chesney? Garth Brooks. And it sold out so fast that they added another show. And by the end, they added 15 shows. Oh, God.

So he was there for like a full week and a bit. Damn. Why wouldn't they just build a bigger stadium? It sold those so fast they. Expanded the stadium. Did he also have nothing else to do? He just, like, showed up at Edmonton and stayed two weeks. Yeah.

It's like doing local hotels. He's doing, yeah, open bikes outside. I remember seeing ads for him, like, his tour coming to Vancouver, and it would be him in, like, not really, like, what you would call stage, like, nothing flashy. Yeah. Like black jeans and a tucked in shirt and a cowboy hat. but he's also on wires. He's a hell of a performer. I also remember a thing from the commercial of him

and another guy with acoustic guitars and they smash them together. Oh, nice. I feel like, am I wrong in saying that smashing up the guitar is making a comeback? I feel like it was gone for a long time. I also feel like more, like, aggressive energy is becoming popular again.

You know what I mean? With the downslope of DEI. is like guitar smashing masculine and like Elon Musk with the chain saw like there's all kinds of little things like that happening Eminem should go on tour again that feels like the time is right I think Eminem has really stood the test of time for me oh yeah is he still good I mean he was like the best when I was in high school he was the coolest guy well he was the coolest guy I looked up to that was yeah he was my third crush yeah he was my third crush yeah he was my It's a real crush.

I don't want to tell you where on the list Kid Rock was, but now we also have overheard sent in to us by people all around the world. Oh, no, wait, we didn't get your second one. I apologize. That's okay. Okay, so I've got I think I put this

one on the list because it is among the most serious overheards that I've ever encountered in my life. Wow. Definitely popped up as like, okay, this is something. Yeah. But it's a little little dark.

Okay. I was trying to put my fish in a backpack. In the corporate world, um, sometimes there are these scenarios where people will accidentally add names to the email chain. Right. So this email went out about two years ago, fully named,

you know, from two, but then, uh, ced the entire consulting Canadian function. So this is like, All the way up and down, like juniors down to 20, seniors like 60. People consulting in Winnipeg, Saskatoon, Vancouver, all of the markets.

And like, you know, everyone. So this is like probably 5,000 people. Oh. It reads, hello. Person's name. I know this has been going on for months. Oh, shit. But my wife just tested positive for herpes.

Oh, what? Oh my God. And MSV. Never heard of it. and is waiting on other tests this was a huge mistake I love my wife given all of this

I don't think we should see each other again Wow so I've got diagnosed with this and we're breaking up I don't know the transmission lines but it's heavy heavy drama and that went out everywhere and then instantaneously

that was all over like glass door and Reddit oh sure God like clients and friends and other businesses that are like what's going on over there and these people still work there too and was it all an accident?

Like the CCing was an accident? Never got to the but like there's definitely some suspicion around like is this real? Was this a prank? Like did somebody open their computer and like send this malicious email? Pretty good prank if it was a prank. I'm trying to find what MSV is.

Never heard of it. No. I hope it's not that thing I have. Uh, yeah, And she, Why? Why? Well, according to Wikipedia, it's

May's streak virus Is a plant virus that primarily affects maize. So they got like corn. Yeah. It's a corn based virus. Not all of it was sexually transmitted. They were using corn for a lot of their relationship. Why was she using the company email to send a personal?

They both worked there. Uh. They were both. They were on the same team. Still, you know, I'd use a text. Yeah. Even though I, I hunger for your niblets. I think we should cut it out.

Damn NSBs. My throbbing cob. Oh, yeah. Green giant, right? We'd all fuck green giant. Oh, my God. Top or bottom. Both.

Versatile. Yeah, I'd climb up to the top and then he'd pull me back down to the bottom, but I'm pretty crafty. Um, and now... You know what I love about Green Giant? Oh, ho, ho, tell me. His weird, like, leafy toga. Yeah.

What is it? Is it leaves? He kind of looked Greek in my mind. Yeah. When I think back, like he had those kind of Greek curls. Who else do you think looks Greek? Jeff Dunham's new puppet they put out. What's he?

Oh, and he's got that little sprout guy who's his little buddy or son? I think it's the hair. The hair, the leaf hair looks kind of... Yeah, the leaf hair looks kind of a little Greek. Yeah. Ho, ho, ho. Yep. It is a, it's a Luke.

Yeah, okay. Green Giant. If you'd like to get in touch with Green Giant, just send us an email, alright, we'll make the connection for you. Man, I love corn. By the, I like peas as well. But corn in a can, peas in the frozen. Yeah.

It's my policy. Let's get an upskirt on him there. Hell yeah. Oh, he's got a huge asparagus dick. That's weird. because he's not that big. Now, we also... His pee always reeks, though.

We have listener overheards. If you want to send one in, you can send it into sb.wit maximum fun.org. And this first one comes from Tyler F in Las Vegas. I was sitting on my back porch and the neighbor lady comes out of her house in the middle of the phone conversation.

And I heard you say, so I ask him if he did it. He said that it must have been the cat, but there's no way that a cat piss that much. Doing a little forensic work here. That's one thing about cats

that scares me is they'll just pee. Yeah. I do. Yeah. And they like they'll just pee in a closet somewhere. You've got to find it. And like kitty litter box is like, to me it's like the grossest thing in the world. Are you a cat man? I grew up with a cat and I do

have a soft spot in my heart for cats. Like nice ones. Some of them are awful. But the nice ones I like. but I'm a dog owner. Oh, yeah, what kind of dog now? Oh, yeah, what kind of dog? He's a rescue, but he's like big kind of lab looking, a little bit Doberman looking.

Okay. I love cats, and I just want to listen to know, I love cats. And that's it. This next one comes from Sean and Brooklyn, walking past two Gen Z girls. One says, you know, I have, wait, what's the opposite of sauce spot? I have a hard on for that kind of thing

I mean I never thought about them being connected Yeah I guess well they're not No but you know soft spot The opposite of a soft spot a soft spot is when you're like Like I got a heart string Yeah and then I guess a hard on could be an enthusiasm Yeah But they're both positive

Like I feel like the opposite of a soft spot Should be like I have a like I have no sympathy for Yeah I've got a hard attitude. Yeah. Yeah. Like sort of how Gargamel feels about the Smurfs.

God, he hates those smurfs. But he does have a heart on. He really does. Um, this last one comes from Christine from right here in Vancouver City. This week, I was at my first pottery class of a six-week course. Oh, that'll be fun. Yeah, I think at one point you get to do the ghosts thing. They will get one.

If you're, you know, maybe they'll introduce the wheel towards the, the end in the first few weeks you're going to be doing those um you have to roll out a bunch of snakes yeah and like make them into a a basket kind of yeah yeah but you can do it with the ghost uh you can do that too yeah yeah the ghost is just helping you build it doesn't want to roll in the hands behind you the whole time you're just going oh my darling um so six week course of pottery at the end of the class. An older woman was talking to another student. She was saying how she does better one-on-one and that booked a side session for extra help.

Then she asked for, did the instructor say she had ADHD? The other student replied, yes. And I do too. Then the woman quietly and wistfully whispered to herself, do I have ADHD? It is a thing. It's something. Absolutely. When you're, when that's, I think how a lot of people are, yeah.

learning about their own sort of brains where they're like, huh, this person who also forgot to eat the cereal that was put in front of them says they have ADHD. That's my story. Yeah, you ADHD? Yeah. I think I am as well. Not sure positively. I definitely don't have the forgetting to eat cereal, gee.

Absolutely. What's, uh, do you bowl cereal every day? No. No. It's like a rare, it's a rare treat. My breakfast is usually an apple, and then maybe a little bit of yogurt. That's nice. They were out of my apple at the store this week.

Which one? What do you go for? Red delicious. Ambrosia. What's your favorite type of apples? I go pink lady. Honeycrisp. What's your breakfast?

I usually don't eat breakfast. No? Maybe a boiled egg, coffee. I'll always do coffee, coffee and water. And then I'll usually eat around lunchtime. you're not hungry when I wake up I'm so hungry I don't understand why yeah I eat probably too much at night like I'll have a big dinner like all the things you're not supposed to do like a bigger dinner snacks after that yeah a couple of beers

midnight quick toast chips yeah throw it all up start again yeah tomorrow's a new day pinch pinch pinch purge purge purge in addition over hers that are written in we also accept your phone calls If you want to call us, our phone, you did all three, right? Yes. Yeah. Number is one. 844-779-7631. That's one.

Ugh. SpyPod one, like these people have. You can also send us a voice memo. SPY at maximum fun.org like these people have. Hello, Dave, Graham, and guest. This is Sarah from Calgary, calling in with an overheard. And before you guys speculate, I went to E.P. Scarlet. So this evening, I was just coming out of my massage, and I don't know if you guys have ever experienced this with massages before, but quite often it, like, moves a lymphatic fluid through you, so you get kind of congested, stuff, you know, stuff like that.

As I was walking out, there was a male guest, I guess, talking to his male massage therapist, and he's kind of sniffling, and the massage therapist goes, oh, sorry, can I get you a tissue? And the guy goes, yeah, thanks. You just, you really know how to drain me. Okay, off I go. Professor Xavier. We all saw that coming there. Oh, yeah, wow. Imagine me sitting on that the whole episode,

knowing that we're going to get back to draining. Did you, are you a massage receiver? I'm not very good at it. And so I'll go occasionally. usually ADHD, like usually if it's like booked for me and there's something in the calendar, if left to my own devices, I just won't do it. Yeah, I usually have my, uh, my girl book. Booked for me.

Who's booking me things? Um, yeah, I've, uh, I had the problem with my back, so I had to go get some physio that included massage. Okay. And, uh, I don't like the small talk. Oh, it's awful. I feel like that should not be allowed. Yeah. The default should be just dead silence.

Yeah. But on like some relaxing music, or, you know, whatever, Shunay Twain or Cheryl Crow, whatever you like. Yeah, any of the S-H singers of the 90s. Yeah, when I go there, they're like, where are you feeling tense? And I'm like, well, my neck, my back, and two other places. I'm going to let you discover. Next phone call. Hello, Dave Graham and a potential guest.

I'm Francesca calling in from Sussex with an overheard from my. seven-year-old who was being quite dramatic the other day and after about the tempter time he said this is the worst day ever I said well it's not Stalingrad and he said

yeah and it's not ending good either it's not Stalin grad is not Stalingrad is that a what is it now Stalingrad it's St. Petersburg or is that Leningrad

Oh, yeah. But is that a saying that would... Moscow? Would transcend generations? Yeah, like, it was a little... Like, yeah, see... I know that there was a big battle there. Yeah.

And I believe that's where the movie Rockstar takes place, but no, enemy at the gates take place. Oh, yeah, I remember that. With Jude Law and Rachel Weiss. Remember there's like a grubby kind of soldier hand job scene in that movie. Yeah, it's good.

It's, oh, I think it's whole penetration, not just hand job. Sorry, Dave. It is now Volgograd. Voldograd. Okay, there you go. I knew it was, I knew it was on the tip of my tongue. Volgograd. It's Volgograd.

It's the largest city in the administrative center of Volgograd Oblast. Hmm. Okay. So that's what that's got the best. shopping. Yeah, and it lies on the western bank of which river? That's right there. It's right there.

The Urales? Check out, these Urales. I don't know any Russian rivers. Yeah, me neither. How about the Volga? Ah, the Volga! Guys, you guys, oh man, this is like, that's in the 200 clue on Jeopardy. Russian rivers?

Yeah, Russian. VolgaGrad lies on this Russian river. What is the Danube? I love when they, on Jeopardy, get down to just one column. And this is the one. I remember being classic, it was sports. No, we're not going to go. I, I, yeah, are you allowed to, like, choose to abstain?

Yeah, we've decided to abstain for this category. And here's your final phone call. Hi, Dave and Graham. Or voice memo. Just got back from the pharmacy where I ever heard a conversation between a gentleman and a cashier. And so the cashier was explaining that she'd just got a cat and that every morning she dropped the cat off with her sister because her sister had the brother cat of said cat. Okay, fair enough. Anyhow, the gentleman's response to this was, oh, how anthropomorphic of you.

so I guess he meant philanthropic but yeah good on him no freaking way oh I don't know if it's even that philanthropic no not

not really anthropomorphic is if you like you turn into an animal right or you like put googly eyes on your fridge yeah yeah yeah what's the thing where humans can see a face in things.

Oh, boy. You know what I'm talking about? Is it aphasia, maybe? I don't, I really, I don't. I think aphasia is. Sounds like something. I think effesia is you can't recognize the face. I think.

Oh, my God. Peridolia? Yeah, right. The tendency for perception to impose a meaningful, interpretation on a nebulous stimulus, usually visual, so that one detects an object pattern or meaning where there is none. Well, there's always meaning. Yeah, like that outlet, you know, like you can just see the face in it.

Right. Oh, and it's just asking for it. Absolutely gagging for it. Also, that guy called and said he was at the pharmacy. Is that a British word? Why, they were the chemist? The chemist. Don't dumb it down for us.

Say the chemists. Yeah, exactly. I was leaving my flat to go to the chemist. Smoking, an F-flur? Well, that brings us to the end of this podcast. Connor, this has been so much fun. Thanks for having me, guys. This was a lot of fun.

It was great seeing you. I hope your show goes well, and there's many happy returns. Yeah, I hope so, too. It's going to be happening before I think this episode airs. I think so, too. It'll be up on our social media after that. What's the social media? Where can they find you?

We are Futureproof Live. That's on Instagram. and YouTube and TikTok. Okay. Yeah. And this is, yeah, I wish you have a fantastic taping of this. And I hope to see you in 10 years. Yeah.

No, I hope it's sooner than that. Ten years and we're like, oh, I guess you went to the tattoo removal. And also you went to Turkey because you have a full head of hair. Full head of hair. That's right. It can look beautiful. Well, thank you so much. And thank you out there for listening.

If you're thinking about which of the X-Men you want to have sex with, I say, go for Xavier. And we'll come back for another episode of Stop Podcasting yourself. network of artist-owned shows supported directly by you