#STRask - Shouldn’t I Be Praying for My Soul Rather Than for Material Things?

Episode Date: February 2, 2026

Questions about whether we should be praying for our souls rather than for material things, why we need to pray about decisions, whether the devil can hear our prayers and tempt us with “answers,” and whether it’s okay to pray for someone’s death rather than healing.   Shouldn’t I be praying for my soul rather than for material things such as a house or a new job—i.e., a diet version of the prosperity gospel? If I’m faced with a decision to do something that’s a good thing and doesn’t violate anything in Scripture, why do I need to pray about it to see if it’s something God wants me to do? Can the devil hear our prayers, and if so, will he tempt us with “answers” to those prayers? Is it okay to pray for someone’s death—i.e., for God to release them from suffering rather than for his miraculous healing?

Well, Greg, in the last episode, we talked about prayer, and I have more prayer questions to follow from those. All right. And this first one comes from Aaron. I hear people say they, quote, prayed for this when it comes to material things such as a house, a new job, etc. I know prayers are not a wish list, and I find myself wondering if we have the right idea about prayer. Shouldn't I be praying for my soul rather than a diet version of prosperity gospel? Well, I'm pausing because I'm trying to think of what to make of the last phrase. The suggestion is that if you're praying for things, for yourself, that it's, I don't know how they...

The prosperity gospel, Aaron. A watered-down version of the prosperity gospel. I don't... Oh, he, Aaron, the other Aaron. Yeah. I don't see it that way. I think prosperity gospel is taking a legitimate thing and pushing it to an illegitimate extreme, and in so doing, changing the focus entirely to dependence on the father in a humble way for what he says he will.

He wants us to appeal to him for. And two, an interesting getting things in some magical way through prayer and faith, okay? that's what they call it, name it and claim it, and, you know, the word faith, stuff like that, because the emphasis is way different. But that doesn't mean because some people abuse the notion that there isn't an appropriateness to ask for things. So think of what Philippians is it for. Be anxious for nothing.

But in everything, with prayer and supplication, with Thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. So there's a very clear statement there of Paul's that we are to pray about things, and sometimes we're anxious. What are we anxious about? We might be anxious about money, could be anxious about bad news, anxious about health, anxious about relationships. These are all particular kinds of things that Paul says appeal to God to repair, resolve, provide for. That's all things. Now, that doesn't mean, though, that when you're doing that, that it's not like you're going to a store and buying something with the currency of prayer. And by the way, even when you do that, I don't know about most people, but when I do that, I get the stuff.

I pay for it. And I say, thank you. I'm still grateful that they provide the service where I can exchange money for goods. but this is a relational element where we're in a dependency, we are facing need and we have a dependent relationship on God that we are acknowledging in the way that we ask for the things that we think we need, or maybe the things that we want. And, I mean, pray unceasingly, Paul says in First Thessalonians 5, in every, everything give thanks. I don't think he means that your unceasing prayer should all be

thanks, prayers of Thanksgiving. I think they should be prayer about all kinds of things. It's this notion captured in the Latin phrase quorum deu before God, the idea that you're a C-O-R-A-M-D-E-O. We're always in God's presence. Brother Andrew called it practicing the presence of God, an ancient, a much older devotional piece. That's very well-known. known. But we're always there before God, walking with him in his presence, as it were, and communicating needs as they come up. And so it isn't just a matter of, in a sense, praying for our spiritual things rather than material things. I think that's kind of a false dichotomy, because when we are praying appropriately for those material things, which Paul says we ought to

be doing, then we are actually nurturing the spiritual communion that we have. have with God. We're communicating our dependency on him and our trust in him. So I think that's kind of a false dichotomy. And certainly the scripture makes very clear that we're to pray for a multitude of things, including those more practical needs. Fret not, basically, that's the way the psalmist puts it, be anxious for nothing, Paul's term. So I think those are all Well, no, sometimes I think we can get too much into making requests. And I only say that in this sense. Sometimes I feel like, okay, I want to pray like I'm driving to the office this morning.

And I think, all right, now I've got to look at my list and see what I need to pray for. Well, I want to be faithful to the things that come up that I want to pray for. But what I did this morning is I just started singing a personal hymn that was, a relationship him, you know. In other words, it was I'm talking to God about God and me and wanting closeness or expressing praise or something. And I realize, hey, that's prayer. That's a communication with God that's important.

I don't just have to go through a list of things, but I can commune with God in different ways with different words or in praise or something like that. So it's more full-orbed than just the list of requests. Makes sense? Yeah, and I think you made a distinction between people who are praying, like using God to get things. I think we can check ourselves to see. You know, sometimes, you know, even think about a child. They're asking their parents for things. And there's a way to ask them for things where they're being greedy. And there's a way to ask them for things where they're just joyfully saying, oh, can I have this? And they say no or whatever. And then they're like, okay, and they're doing it in a way that's submissive to the will of the parent, and it can just be a joyful request and nothing bad. So I think if you keep an eye on yourself and make sure you're not using God as a means to an end, where you're not using this as some sort of a mirror. A mere means to an end. So your goal,

well, James, isn't it James, who says, you ask. and you do not receive because you do not ask. Right. And then you says you do not receive. You ask and not receive because you ask with wrong motives to spend it all your pleasures and right. So that's something to keep in mind. Sure. Are you asking for things that will help you to glorify God and help you to serve others?

Are you thinking about things in those terms? Are you thinking about ultimately the glory of God and everything that you're asking for? So that's something to keep your heart in check. And then another thing you could do is look at the Lord's Prayer and use that as a guide to kind of your emphasis in your prayers. So there is a section on, give us to stay our daily bread. There is a section on there. And there's all those other sections. So maybe you could be more conscious about bringing all of those aspects into your prayer and keep them all in perspective.

But, you know, we are needy people and we need things. we are dependent on God for things. And I mean, I don't know how other people are, but I don't think most people are praying for things. Like, oh, I would like a computer and I would like a car. And I just, it seems to me in all the prayer groups I'm in, we're usually praying for people. Yeah. And or our own desperation or our fear or all these, you know, certainly people pray for a job. and things like that. There are needs. There are physical deeds that are important to pray for, right.

And so those are the kinds of things I hear. I don't tend to hear people just giving a like a Christmas list to Santa. Portia. Portia. And I think all of these things are legitimate. All the things that we just need in life as human beings, as long as you're submitted to God's will and you have his glory and other people's good in mind. I don't think there's any problem with it. Here's a question from Kate. My question is about prayer. I know prayer is extremely important,

but if we are faced with a decision that is clearly a good thing, not in violation with what God clearly states in Scripture, why do I need to pray about it to see if it's something God wants me to do? Well, that last phrase is the key one, to see if it's something God wants me to do. Now, this is a piece of current evangelical decision-making model that presumes that God is the one who makes the decisions in our life, and we have to, in a sense, squeeze the information out of him what his decision is regarding this, so that once we know what he's decided, then we can decide.

And so that's what people call finding God's will. Now, I don't think this is a biblical model, and we've talked about this quite a bit, and it's the final book that I'll be publishing, it deals with this issue. Okay, I'm tired of writing big books, but so this is one that's important that I want to, I want to finish and get out there. So I don't think you need to pray for that. basically you're praying, God, tell me what to do. And certainly there are, we want to live according to God's will, and we think that that's

an appropriate way of living according to God's will, but it presumes that God has a will like that that we have to discover. That's what the Bible doesn't teach, that there is this blueprint for our lives that we have to get the information from God. that we can then follow his blueprint for our lives. Now, I'm not denying that God has a sovereign purpose for our lives, but that's behind the curtain of his sovereignty. As R.C. Sprole used to say, that's none of your business. You know, God's sovereign purposes are not our business. We are given scripture and other Christians to help us in decision-making, to determine what is moral and

immoral, on the one hand, not just actions, but also intentions and motives that could disqualify an action as being appropriate. And also, there's a wisdom element. What's smart? And so when we make decisions, those are the questions we ought to be asking ourselves, not what is God, do I think God is telling me that I need to do? Because it's presuming that that's the role that God wants to play in. your life, and that's not, the scripture doesn't teach, that's the case.

Now, for me to say this, and especially for those who are new to listening to, you know, or material, whether my own show or S.G.R.S.K. with you, this is almost anathema. I was actually called a heretic for once. In the middle of a teaching, somebody got up in the middle of the class and called me a heretic. And I was just talking last week with a very well-known apologist, and he asked what book I was working on next, and I mentioned this, and he raised some, like, he was incredulous that I would take exception with this idea. What? And so I understand that there is a received tradition in evangelicalism, but it simply is not

New Testament or Old Testament, for that matter, biblical. It doesn't mean that people haven't been told by God what to do they have on occasion, but that's not the standard, is the point. So I would take exception with this concern, at least the way it's stated. You're not praying to find out what God wants you to do in a given circumstance so you can do it. What you're doing is you're praying to have asking God for wisdom, James I, ask God for wisdom, especially in trials and difficulties, for insight, for like holding all of the issues in good balance and trying to see things as the are and for other people can help you. Other Christians can help you maybe see things you don't see. This is the, in the abundance of counselors, there's victory. So that's Proverbs. So that's a book of

wisdom, all right? If you make a decision without any counselors, is that immoral? No, but it may be dumb. It's better to get a lot of feedback. And we understand the reason, obviously, are in a habit of getting lots of feedback from each other on lots of things that are important decisions. And so So that, I think, is the model that we should follow and not trying to pray to get a word from God, a feeling from God, a nudge from God, or trying to cobble together all the hint, hints that we think God is offering so that we can do what he wants. That's not the biblical model. So if somebody asked me to make a decision about something or if I want to do something

and I say, well, let me pray about it. What I'm saying is I'm going to pray for wisdom. I'm going to pray that God brings all the things to light that I need to see, that he would help me to think clearly about it, that he would bring good counsel. You're basically asking for wisdom and you're submitting to God and his wisdom and you're placing it in his hands. Maybe it's something you really want to do. And it's just a matter of making this decision before God. and asking for his help in making the decision, not giving an answer, but in providing all these different things that you're asking for so that you can make a wise decision. Because he is maturing you. He's not just telling you what to do. He's giving you wisdom to help you

know how to do things. Any submissive person can take orders, but it takes a person of wisdom and maturity to make good decisions. That's what God's after. So to echo your comment just then. And sometimes his plan is for us to make a bad decision because when we make a bad decision, we learn a lot of things. And God's greatest goal is not to give us a perfect life. His greatest goal is to make us like Christ. And that involves us making wrong decisions and learning from those. That doesn't mean we've gone against God or whatever. It means we probably didn't use wisdom.

Maybe we didn't ask him for wisdom. But anyway, there are a couple books even now if people are interested. Well, of course, on our website, we have the Ambassador's Guide to, what is it, the Voice of God? Yeah, right. But that's basically a critique of this other approach. It's a critique of this other approach. If you're interested in reading about that. I'm assessing the verses that are proof texts for this view have been pressed into service as a proof text and showing that these verses are not saying that at all in the context.

There's a book by Gary Friesen called Decision Making in the Will of God, and there's a shorter one by Kevin D. Young called Just Do Something. Right. They're great. So those are all options if you want to learn more about this. And of course, you've talked about this so many times on this show and on your regular show also. Okay, here's a question from, oh, I should have looked at this more carefully before. Snejanta piranha. I don't know how close I got there. But The question is, can the devil hear our prayers? If yes, will he tempt us with, quote, answers to those prayers? Well, to the first question, yes, of course. I don't know why anyone would think differently. Okay. The devil's a sentient being. He has awareness. He has plans. He deceives. He lies. There are all kinds of things that Scripture's characterizes him as. And so I have no, I mean, certainly he can hear.

Look, when Jesus spoke to demons, the demons heard him. And so if you're praying aloud, the powers of darkness are going to hear your prayers. I think a more, and maybe this is what, let's call him, Piranha was getting at, was can he hear, can he read our minds? Does he know what we're thinking? And if we're praying in our heart and not verbally, then can he tell? I think you can. I don't know how to make sense of that. But if he's the tempter, then I have no reason to think that there are ways that he tempts us in our minds as well.

and I'm trying to think a proof text right now that I can't necessarily think of them. But there are people who disagree. I remember a long conversation I had with a friend many years ago, really disagree that the devil could read our minds. But it just strikes me so many things that since he's the tempter and the liar, he can affect us internally in a way that causes us. us to doubt based on thinking about lies, you know. So, but I don't think that has any, I mean, our prayer. He's going to make us, he's going to give us false answers to our prayers. I'm

not sure you even understand the second part of that. I think what he might do, I mean, I don't think it's because of our prayers. I think he knows, let's say somebody desires to be in a relationship. Well, he might tempt you with someone who would be bad for you to date. I mean, that's possible. But that's, that's just because. he's always tempting us according to our desires. So our prayers, I don't think, he already knows what our desires are. He already knows what we're praying about. So I don't think we could, we should ever change our prayers because we're trying to avoid the devil hearing what we're saying. Yeah, I don't see any justification for that.

Incidentally, if you want to know how the devil works in a Christian's life, there's a rich storehouse for that in a very clever foil as C.S. Lewis's screw tape letters. And you have recommended John Cleese's reading of that. Oh, yeah. You can find it on YouTube. Yeah. Yeah, he's great. Yeah, I think he really captures it. And he's an atheist, too, I think, but, you know, it's interesting. Maybe that's why he does such a good job playing the demon. Anyway. Okay. I have much more to say about it, but I'm going to go on to the next one. Okay, so much more to say about John Cleese doing that, not about the question. I don't want to get off on a tangent. I just really like that version of it.

Okay. So we're going to squeeze one more question in here from Jason. Is it okay to pray for someone's death, for God to release them from suffering rather than praying for God's miraculous healing? Well, I've done it. It was 2017 when Melinda had her accident, and she had a TBI traumatic brain injury, falling from a ladder and, you know, flipping and landing on her head and concrete, and it was awful. It took her out of play for five years, and then the Lord took her home. And my prayer was, I mean, I guess my request was more elegant than praying that she'd die, but I simply prayed either heal her or take her home, but don't leave her in the middle.

And what God, his sovereign wisdom, decided to do was to leave her in the middle for five years. And a little more two years ago, she went to be with the Lord. So I've prayed it after fashion. Take her home, Lord. Take her home. It's your choice. But this is what I'm praying and asking. And there's no, you have not because you ask not, you know, back to James again.

And I, and so I think it's entirely appropriate for us to pray for what we want to happen. That's not immoral. And it certainly isn't immoral for someone in a terrible physical straits to just just go be it with the Lord. I don't see a problem in there. What do you think? It's funny. I haven't thought too much about this.

I don't think I've ever prayed for someone's death. I think I tend to put it in terms of God to have mercy. And this is what you were saying. This is basically what you're saying without going into the details with God and just saying, I just pray that you would have mercy on this person, however that looks to you. Because he would know best what mercy is. I can imagine all sorts of situations where I don't know if I could bring myself to pray for someone's death, but I could certainly pray for their mercy and leave that in God's hands. I think that's something we can all do.

Because certainly, obviously, we would prefer that God heal the person. That's obviously our first prayer. So, yeah, so I understand why you were praying either heal or. take her home, I think I would just put it in terms of mercy. Yeah. It's more general, but a lot of times when I don't know how to pray and when I don't have faith for healing, for example, and that's one of the hardest things for me to pray for, I will pray at different times, and sometimes I just say, Lord, I just can't muster up

the confidence to pray for this, but I'm going to pray for mercy because that can look different ways in different circumstances. Right. And I frequently pray that prayer for other people and also for myself in the circumstances that I'm facing. Mercy. I don't know what that's going to look like, but I'm going to pray it down. In fact, the so-called Jesus' prayer is a very simple prayer, has different variations, but it amounts to, Lord Jesus, have mercy on me a sinner. Lord Jesus have mercy on me a sinner.

Now, some people pray that over and over and over again, you know, and it almost becomes rote, I think. But when prayed for the heart, I think that's an appropriate prayer for us to pray. Well, thank you all for all these good questions. Thank you, Erin and Kate and Piranha and Jason. We appreciate hearing from you. And you can send us your question on X with the hashtag STR ask or just go to our website at STR.org. This is Amy Hall and Greg Kokel for Stand to Reason. Thank you.