Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 007 - Is Marla's Boyfriend Massively Cheating on Her?

Episode Date: January 26, 2014

Marla not only found us on craigslist, she also found her boyfriend's "looking for sex" ads on there as well. Besides the Craigslist ads, Marla has snooped her way into a ton of evidence that her BF is cheating but for some reason she still isn't convinced. Is she in denial or is she just not ready to leave him? Listen in for the detials so you can decide. **To see anonymous pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. Craigslist is definitely the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it. The temptation is just too much.

Real problems. Does your friend know that you're banging her? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your reflect lie. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-hide your whips and chain. Here are your hosts, Kathy K.

And Tommy. Hey, welcome to Strictly Anonymous Podcast with Kathy K and Tommy. Hi, Kathy. Hey, Tommy. I'm here with Tommy. If you'd like to call into the show, if you have a problem or a question, you want to ask us, and you want to be on our next show, email us at strictly anonymous podcast. At gmail.com.

And we'll have you on. Just send in your problem, your age, and your sex. Yeah. And you can follow us on Twitter. Strict Anonymous. Strict Anonymous. Strict Anonymous. Tommy's finally done his homework.

So today we finally have a girl. I can't believe that. A girl is calling in. I'm so excited. It's our first girl. When you hear her problem, you'll understand how she found us. You know, I think the reason why we never get girls is because I advertise on Craigslist strictly on Craigslist. And no girls are on there really looking for anyone.

Unless they're prostitutes and looking for John. Like what girls on Christos? That'd be a great call. Yeah, I know, but they're not going to call. You know, they're just looking, you know, they're doing their job. Unless you speak Chinese, we won't probably get a prostitute to call. No, I get a lot of guys emailing me that they're dating prostitutes or escorts that used to be, that they're their Johns that used to be, but they crossed over.

And they have issues with them and they're being tortured by these girls that are torturing them. Yeah, but they're like, they're man-eaters. I know. That's the whole thing. That's what happens. And I've had two or three guys, and they're so beaten down by their little escorts. It's kind of hilarious. I can't believe why this relationship's not working out.

Exactly. Seriously. So Marla, this girl's name is Marla and Stephanie. So we'll call her Marla Stephanie. She emails me from two separate emails. Can we call her Marstaff? Marstaff. That sounds like an infection.

You never know. Marstaff? It just sounds like a disease, like something itchy. I'm not interested. No, listen to this. So this is what she emailed me. It just sounds like something itchy. I don't like.

Okay. My boyfriend and I have been together for about three years and live together for two. Recently, he started doing some things that made me feel very uncomfortable. I couldn't ignore the feeling and I didn't get any answers when I confronted him so I looked through his phone. I know that's not the right thing to do and I don't want to make it into a practice, but I found that he had responded to a number of ads for sex on Craigslist. Listen to this, my favorite. I found a dick pick, and that's in quotes. I found a dick pick that is definitely his.

and most alarmingly, I found a picture that we had taken during sex with my face blacked out. Oh, at least she had the courtesy to block her face out. I don't know. I don't know if I'd be insulted by that or I'd be happy about that. That could go either way. So I can't imagine why he would have done that unless he intended to or has sent it somewhere. I don't know how to confront him about this. I'm almost short, we'll end the relationship, but we share a lease and have financial obligations together.

Please help. I'm 28 and my email is blah, blah, blah. All right. So they're not married, right? No, boyfriends. She's young. She's 28. They're dating for three years. Basically, I wonder if he emailed us. So obviously that's why she's on Craigslist, right? She's probably looking through ads of what he's done. Now she's like going mental, you know, trying to be a private detective herself. And she emailed me. And she's actually like, she actually has emailed me a bunch of times to try and coordinate and she works. And she sounds like a really normal. Like I predict. And this is what I love to predict because I could be totally wrong. That she's like. Because you're never wrong. No, I'm always wrong. That's what I love. That's what's so interesting because I think I always know it all and with this stuff I'm always wrong So I like she just seems like the way she writes and the way she emails me she's like her grammar and her punctuation It's better than mine like I just think she's a very normal gal that's what I'm thinking but maybe we get Looney Tunes call it like that's more interesting

I mean this story alone is interesting we don't need her to be nuts But she seems just like a really nice girl that's really you know I always wonder why girls will call in and talk to strangers because, you know, as a girl, I have my own friends to talk to. I understand why guys calling because they don't have people to talk to. So I'm wondering why she's calling it. Maybe she doesn't, what I think, and I said to her, because she says, it's always great. She said at one point in an email, it's always good to get a new perspective on this. And maybe, you know, sometimes it's hard to talk to your friends because they have their own agendas.

As a woman, your friends have their own agendas. They're jealous. They're mad. They hate your guy because all you do is tell them the bad things. Well, they always say it's easier to talk to strangers. Yes, right. You know, you don't know, you don't know me. I don't know you.

Especially with something like this. Maybe, you know, as a woman, you don't want to tell your friends because then they're all going to be like, oh, my God, I'm cheating. You have to leave him. And if she doesn't know what she wants to do, you don't want to tell your friends and then look like a loser that you're not doing anything about it. Or the guy could be an asshole and her friends don't like him. And she tells them that this is going on and they'll give him the old, I told you so. Precisely. Yeah.

Yeah. And that's going to ruin her life. And then she does not ready to walk. She's not ready to walk. She's not ready to walk. I sent the email to my friend Robert Kelly, who's, who's a. always good on advice. Maybe we'll call him. I should call him one day so he could give his little

rants and raise because he's good on it. And he was like, he's cheating on her. Really? You figured that L-Lab? I know. I wanted to write back, duh. You know, my whole thing was, is he cheating on her with a guy. Ooh. Yeah. But my friend said, no, he wouldn't have sent the picture

of him and her having sex, but like maybe he's a bi guy. A bi guy would be into that, right? Maybe he's looking for group. Group sex? Yeah, but without his girl? Yeah, well, that's like, you know, to get her in, you know? Yeah, well, let me just tell you, you remind me of, like, somehow I was Googling today on Huffington Post, I think it was.

And I found this article about a guy who had shot his best friend over a threesome gone wrong. And it was like what you just said. And then it sent me, after I clicked on that link and read that story, it sent me to, like, this great article that had 16, like, of the worst bad sex stories gone awry. It was, like, really fascinating. I'll post those on our Facebook page. But the story that was in the news today was about this guy who had set up a wife swap. It wasn't a three-sum. It was a wife swap with his friend.

And they brought the women over, but the women didn't know. Okay. And they got liquored up. And when one of the women went out of the room, one of the guys started to go after and started to try to make out with the other guy's wife while his wife was in the other room. Right? You're following? Yeah.

Neither wife knew. So when he starts making out with the wife of his friend, she was an issue. into it. She's like, I don't want to make out with you. Like, I'm not, you know, she's going. Right. Even though these guys had planned the whole wife's up, they didn't get the wives in. Smart guys, right? Geniuses. So the other wife walks into the room and catches him making out with the friend's wife. And she goes mental and everyone starts having an argument. And then that guy shot his friend and killed him. That's, that's some like Pennsylvania shit. I don't know. I know. Everyone thinks New York is dangerous. I think the fucking suburbs are scary.

places to be. Like whenever I'm watching Dateline and stuff, all that stuff happens in the middle of the country. Like where there's trees and bushes and people can hide. No, where people have a lot of time on their hands. And there's trees and bushes. And they don't have to work. I don't know. Trees and bushes really scare me.

All the trees and bushes you want. You're not afraid. Like when I go to my sister's house in New Jersey, I first of all, I can't even sleep when I'm in our house alone. I can't go to sleep. I can't. I have to sleep with the lights on because I'm too afraid that someone's going to murder me. because there's just everyone goes to sleep at 10 o'clock it's deadsville swear to god there's all these

bushes and trees there's like 28 windows there's so many places that somebody could break in and just kill me how could you go to sleep well funny that you say that yesterday i was in new jersey and i thought i would surprise my sister it was dark so we parked in her driveway and me my wife and the baby walked around to the back sliding glass door wait it was night time yeah it was like six It was pitch black. And they were in the kitchen and we knocked on the door like, hey. And she went, oh my God. And the kids jumped under the table.

That is terrible. No, but I didn't intend it to be that way. And when it happened, I actually felt like I was going to get in trouble. What, by her or by? I thought she was going to have a heart attack. So we're like, no, it's us. It's us. Yeah, that's scary shifts.

Because you know when you're inside and it's dark out, you can't see outside. Well, we didn't know that. And then when we went inside, we were like, oh, okay, I could see those. Right. You don't live in the suburbs, so you don't understand. I don't like that. When I'm on my broke back hunting trips, I sit in a tree stand at from four in the morning until 11 o'clock in the afternoon. Yeah, but you're up in the trees.

No one can murder you up there. I think that's actually, I'd be so safe up there. Think about it, Tommy. You're safe up in a tree. Who's going to get you a squirrel? I'm only about five or six feet up. A monkey, a squirrel, like a rabbit. Like what else?

What could come up? there. New York State monkeys. A murderer? No way. No. You don't get it. That's not, there's nothing scary about living up in a tree. I don't even understand that. It sounds. Sasquatch will get you. How long do you sit up in that tree before you can? And you don't even kill, I know for a fact that you failed at your hunting trip, but didn't kill shit. So you just sit up in a tree at Fort, like do you smoke pipes or something? Like, what do you do up there? I don't know, because I know you don't smoke, don't smoke cigarettes, but I feel like you have to do something. Do you eat to chew tobacco? No, no, no, no. You get there around 430 in the morning.

morning you kind of doze off, let everything settle. Then run, when the sun starts to rise, you hope something walks by. But what do you want, okay, but what time does the sun rise? And I did get something. I'm judged juding you. I have some questions for you. What time does the sun rise? Well, it's full rise.

Not well, just a certain time. You look on your phone, it'll say 6.35, 6 o'clock, something like that. You feel like that. But you get this like gray visible. What time does it start to go like about 5.30? 515, 530, yeah Okay, so you go up there at 4. So what do you do for an hour and a half?

Do you talk to your brother and the other tree? No, you doze off. You doze off. You sleep in the tree? You're not off. Sounds so boring. It's actually fantastic. Because it's like the anticipation.

Yeah. And then when something walks by, it's like your adrenaline starts going. Okay, well, I just want to tell you about two weird things that happened to me today because they're odd. I've lived in New York for 20 years and I had an interesting cab experience. the cab driver. Have you ever had a cab driver pull over because he had to take a shit? And he asked you, I swear to God. And he asks you to man his cab while he goes inside to poop.

Yes, he actually did. And you're allowed to. This is what I've never known. Do you know that they could pause the meter? Yeah. I never knew that. Yeah. Okay. So this guy, but before he went into shit at the hotel, by the way, they shit in hotels. I didn't even know he shitter just had to take a leak. Because he, this is the whole weird thing. He explained. He was like, he was like this really like he was like a foreign older guy you know and he was actually very nice about it it was very odd because i don't really i'm not really interested in bodily functions normally to talk about it it's turned kind of disgusting and he started to tell me how bad his stomach was and he started to go on and get very graphic about the fact that he had to shit and he just and we were getting close to my apartment he said would you mind if i you know i was gonna he's like i didn't want to

pick you up i was going to go to mcdonalds all the way over it's okay that's a fire truck. We love it. That's great. Yeah. Yeah. And I was going to go to McDonald's, but I decided to give you and pick you up instead, but I really need to go to the bathroom. My stomach. Something's wrong. I ate something bad. Like I knew for a fact it's like some sort of dire, gross emergency. And he's like, would you mind staying in the car because I can't park? I'm going to try and stop at this hotel. Did you get in the front seat? No. I said, okay, sure. I'll wait. I just thought it was an interesting story. And then he went in. The guy let him and he stayed in there for like a good 10 minutes. And then he came out. And he

was like really grateful and uh and that was that but i've never had that happen to me before i mean if you really think about it i i i never wondered where cab drivers go to the bathroom when they have to go to the bathroom did you ever wonder do you know that there's a mcdonalds that they all go to but he didn't like he was like a really clean guy he didn't like dirty restrooms so he got to be friends like he said what he does is he's trying to make friends at these hotels and the doorman let them go in they're cool right they let them go in and use the nice bathroom Smart. Yeah, so just right now, while we're talking,

there's some cab drivers, like, shitting in, like, your hotel bathroom, like, right next to you. That's a message to some tourists that are coming to New York. I've had guys pull up to my bar to ask you to the bathroom. Oh, you have? Yeah.

And you let them, right? Yeah. My other experience today that was interesting. This is where I was coming home from in the cab, is that, you know, I'm trying to get pregnant, and I'm using donor sperm. And you buy the donor sperm from a bank. And it's a very interesting process, which I'll get into it another time, like picking it and everything.

But once you have your pick of the litter, what's your problem? Oh, no problem. Put your phone on. My phone is on. Oh. Once you find your pick of the litter, you have to, like, get some vile sense. So I had to go there and make a purchase of some jizz. I had to purchase jiz the other day.

You know, and their donors are all young, hot guys. You know, they're all young, and they give you, like, the staff impressions. And you don't get pictures of them when they're older, but you get baby pictures. Then you hear them talking and but they have to weed out. You know, nobody's going and picking donors from an ugly short guys. Do they get paid for that? Of course. That's the whole point.

Yes. How much do they get paid? I would say, I don't know, I should have you call in and pretend that you're a Jizz donor and you just want to see. Because I'm wondering because I pay like 500 bucks for a vial and I'm sure they're paying them like $120 to jerk off in the bathroom. Seriously. That's not, you know. Not bad. Think about it.

Because it's college students, right? These are like 20-something-year-old guys. Say you jizz every day. A college guy's going to jerk off. You told me the other day you jerk off five times the day still. Oh, I didn't. Oh, my God. You're going to get in trouble for your wife if you told me that you jerk off.

She'd rather me probably jerk off. You're not jerking off here. Don't worry. He's not jerking off here. Just told me he jerks off. That's nothing wrong. Oh, yeah. I'll delete that.

I'll act out your last name. There is nothing wrong with you telling me that you jerk off. So you say you jerk off, I don't say. So these guys, imagine they're doing it once a week, once a day. they can make like 700 bucks a week. Yeah, why not? Yeah. So anyway, I'm in there and waiting for my jizz vials to be bought and in walks a sperm donor.

And I've never seen one in real life. And he was gorgeous. Like it was so weird because we're in this little small waiting room. And I'm sure he's never seen the ladies that buy his sperm. And I never seen the sperm donor. You know what I mean? And he was there and I was there. And I felt like if it was a cartoon.

Why didn't you offer him $450? Save yourself the $50 and have him do it the real way. Yeah, there you go, ruining my story. Like, that was the whole fucking point, asshole. I'm cursing a lot on this fuckass. I wanted to be like, why don't we just go into the bathroom? I'll make it worth your while. It's probably a quicker way to get pregnant.

And he was really good looking. And then he disappeared. It was very uncomfortable. He was kind of looking at me. I was kind of looking at him. Nobody really wants to ever put a face to this kind of stuff. Do you know what I mean? And then he, like, disappeared and he was never even called.

So I felt like he was so uncomfortable that he just had to leave. Like, I didn't hear him call his name or. I don't know, but how did he, where did he go? He just disappeared. I mean, maybe into the bathroom to jerk off and do his business, but I didn't hear anyone call his name. I felt like he left because he was uncomfortable. But yeah, that was my story, which you ruined again.

You just have a weird way about, like, did anyone ever point that out to you that that's what you do? No. You get to the punchline before the person. No. And you ruin everything. I was just trying to help you. Help me with what?

Tell my own story. So anyway, so we have, um, what is our name? name Marla Stephanie. Yeah. Marla Stephanie. I didn't really ask her what her name was, but like I said, she's emailing for her. Maybe she's a guy. You know, this is where I'm thinking that this person is like, I have my own ideas just because strictly by the grammar. Like, that's really all I'm judging

about it. That makes me like a judgmental asshole. I have a friend who's like everything to him is grammar. Like he's like the grammar police. He's always insulting me. He thinks that just like defines people. And now I'm acting like Kim because I feel like I have her pegged just because of the way she writes that she's just like this really great normal cute innocent victim god i hope you're wrong i know me too don't you yes i know but um it'll still be interesting even if it's not because i think unfortunately her situation is uh devastating for a girl i mean what we have to ask her which i think a lot of people wonder is like that question is it right to go look in somebody's phone you know what exactly like would you know when everyone would

say no at first but if you really want to know like I don't know it's a tough thing like what do you you know are you is that really allowed it's not allowed but I mean would you do it? I've never done it my wife has done it plenty

she's done it to you oh yeah and you give her free reign well not in the beginning when we were dating she would do it when you were dating yeah and you know and we we had a relationship we were in and out but when we were dating I mean she saw things on my phone that she wasn't she didn't like

but now that I'm married the phone's unlocked I have nothing to hide you know no that's good because if she was like to me what women need is reassurance right that you're not hiding something no you're giving her trust by letting her say if you were keeping a phone and keeping away

and keeping it and then she's going to think things yeah so I think that that's the best thing if you want a happy wife and not a mental patient a lot of guys like they'll go like oh my girl's so crazy she's so jealous but it's like they make them that way yeah but it's not just the wife I mean as a husband I don't ever want to have a feeling that if I look in my wife's phone,

there's a potential that I'm going to see something that is going to ruin what's going on, you know? Of course, but that's the same thing that she felt. No, I know. I'm just saying that. You keep saying, oh, he's the woman, the woman, the woman. But have you ever gone looking at her through her phone? No.

Why did she go looking through your phone? Because that's, I don't know, that's why she's wired. No, that's because you were a dirty, cheating scumbag. And she knew that. You were kind of like a cheater, and she kind of knew that. She didn't trust you and she needed to regain a trust because you really changed. Yeah. Don't worry.

She won't listen to this one. Okay? Like, seriously. Let's just talk the truth. Okay. So don't say she's wired. This is what I hate when guys give the crazy rap to the girl. When she wasn't crazy, she knew for a fact that you weren't like very faithful.

You cleaned up your act and that's why now there's trust. But when there wasn't trust and she was looking through your phone, she had a reason for it. Yeah. Yeah. So there you go. You don't have a reason to look in her phone because she's probably not cheating. on you? No. Not yet. No, I'm just joking. I hope not. What? I said I hope not. No, she's too busy too. Yeah, she has kids. She won't cheat on you until you get like, you have a big age

difference. So what's going to happen? I'm just going to tell you. Is that, no, don't. I don't want to hear it. Oh, come on. Let me just write your story. No, we can hear about 10 years when it happens. It's so funny that you're actually, you actually are sensitive that you actually think what I say could happen and you're scared of it? No. Who cares what I say? Do you know your future? Do what you think I know your future?

But what I really believe is... Then why are you going to say it? If you don't know my future? Because I think it's so great. This is the thing. I think this whole thing with age with women, you know, and so many men are that are older, date way younger women and older women,

their own age can't get guys. And now because I believe that older women can now screw younger guys, way younger guys. Same thing. It's like, you know, it's changing the playing field. And it's making it a lot better for women. So I don't really believe that these younger girls that are marrying older guys are necessarily going to stay with these older guys. You know, you have less of a chance now. Because when she's 35 or 40, she could also, you know, switch you in for a 25-year-old hot chalk. Like, that's just the way that it goes. So I feel like women are more likely to be exiting out of

relationships like men used to because they could do younger and better as well. And that's a good thing because it just evens the playing field. Guys have been doing it for a long time. Now women could do it. The internet did it. Search engines. No, I think Botox did it. No, I think Botox did it.

Women look good now. Women used to look busted before. Now they could inject their faces and all the shit that they do and they look really good. And they still look good. So it's Botox. And Viagra, I think they're equal. Men got Viagra. Women got Botox.

And, you know, so everyone's having a good time for a little bit longer. Yeah. You know what I mean? Way into their 40s and 50s. I agree. Yeah. Okay, you're captivating today. I'm very captivating today.

I know, but let's wait for Stephanie Marla to call her Marla, Stephanie, whatever. And we'll be back on with Marla, Stephanie, Stephanie. Stephanie, what do you want to call her? Marstaff. Yeah, the disease, Tommy Creed. The itch. We should call her. The itch.

All right. We'll be right back with Marla. Do you have a story, lifestyle, or situation you can't talk about to anyone, to anyone? Or do you just want to let your freak flag fly and be on the show? Well, Strictly Anonymous wants to hear from you. Send us an email, Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com, with your story and your anonymous name. And remember, everything is strictly anonymous.

Strictly anonymous. Hi, I'm the person you've been speaking to in email for a little bit. Yeah, sure. Are we, you know, I didn't know whether we should call you, Stephanie or Marley. or Marla Stephanie because I've gotten emails from you from a Marla account and Stephanie. And everybody always calls in here anonymously. The title of our show is called strictly anonymous. So what do you want us to call you?

Marla Stephanie, Marla Stephanie? You could just call me Marla. My real name is Stephanie, but I actually put Marla Stinger on everything. That's like your alias? No mail or spam or, yeah. Cool. Okay. When I don't want people to, you know, when I want, I don't know, I don't know,

Separate stuff out. I put that on there. Right. Awesome. So I, you know, you're talking to me, Kathy and my co-host Tommy. Hi. How are you? Hi.

I'm okay. How are you? Good, good, good. Yeah, she's not that good. You heard that email that she said. I read Tommy your email and we know your problem. So why don't you just reiterate it for us? Is that how you found me on Craigslist because you were like looking through Craigslist because

your guy was on there? Sorry, can you repeat the last part? Yeah. How did you find me and my posting on Craigslist? Was it because you were on there? looking through Craigslist because your guy's been on there? Yeah, actually. And this is going to sound really awful.

I posted like several fake ads myself just to see if he would respond to any of them, just using some of the keywords that he had looked up. Oh, Marla's smart. This is awesome. She's smart. It's not awful. It's what you would do. No, no, I'm saying she thinks maybe it's awful.

I don't think it's awful. I mean, you're doing what. Did he respond? He didn't. and I had to weave through a lot of really gross stuff. Totally, I could imagine. Yeah, I mean, it's pretty bad. But I have since actually gained access to his email account.

So I have a better idea now of sort of what he's doing and stuff. How did you? Okay, let's start at the beginning. You said in your email that he was doing some things that made you suspicious. And, you know, what were those things? Well, this is what happened. He started using his phone a lot in situations where he never had before. Like, we're both athletes.

We're both big gymgoers. And when he's in the gym, you know, he's often admonished me for using my phone. Put the phone down. We're going to, you know, we're here to work. We're here to do this. And suddenly he's glued to it. He's using it all the time. He's looking at it.

He's laughing. He's typing and typing. And he's responding to someone. he's doing something. Right. And for a while, it kind of didn't bother me. I was like, okay, whatever. But then he started taking it everywhere.

He started putting it face down everywhere. He takes it in the bathroom. Oh, yeah. I had a bathroom texter once. Yeah. Yeah. It goes with him everywhere. He's never without it.

And for a while, I didn't check it. You know, I didn't look into it. I just thought, leave it alone. Don't worry about it. as long as he comes home every night, it's fine. Right. Then he started disappearing for weird little parts of time and didn't come home with good explanations for where he had been.

Because you would ask him and he would just make up stories. And it wasn't sort of adding up to you? Absolutely. And then, I mean, it would just be at times it didn't make any sense. Like we had one evening where we invited another couple over and he arrived maybe 10 minutes before they got here. And his original reason for leaving was to go pick up things for this little bit together, some, you know, foods and stuff like that. And, I mean, he just magically disappeared for five hours.

Oh, my God. Wait, he said he was just going to pick up, like, one thing and it took him five hours? Yeah. I mean, and it may have been like, you know, two or three things or whatever, but it was just, I'm going to go get a handful of like small things. I'm going to run to the store. I'll be right back. And then it's just gone and out of touch. Let me ask you before all these, like, little lies.

stuff was he pretty much straight up or was he always like a liar? You know, I think he may have always been a liar. I'm starting to get that impression. But I'm just sort of now finding out about it. How old is your guy? 32. Just turned 32. He's 32. Okay, so you start to get suspicious because you, you know, the phone thing. You know, Patty Stanger was on that Bravo show last night with Andy Cohen and he said, what are the top three signs that a man is cheating? And she said stupid things. She didn't say the phone thing, which I think is one of the number one. I was surprised she didn't say the cell phone thing.

Because all those things that you saw going on with the cell phone, that to me is like the biggest sign. I mean, a lot of guys, they actually have more than one phone. And those are the smart guys that want to cheat because, you know, like I think that that kind of behavior or change in behavior is always a clue to women. Women are smart. Like, guys don't understand. Like women, we see changes in patterns, you know, we pick up on shit really easily, you know. and so that phone thing is always, I think, one of the biggest red flag. So you saw all this phone action and all these little things.

And so you started to get curious and you started to go snooping, which by the way, I know it sounds really terrible. Me and Tommy talked about this beforehand. Like, you know, what would other people do in this situation? I think most people would eventually go snooping if there was a really hardcore, you know, reason. If you're at the point where you know something's going on and they're not telling you, right? Absolutely. that and I mean we've been together for three years we live together we have financial obligations together and we have unprotected sex I'm on the pill so if he's doing something it's not just a matter of oh I would feel so betrayed it's you are endangering my health and I have a right to know right absolutely that's a very good point no I that's that's a great point yeah why don't we think of that yeah

Marla is more clean cut than we are you're very smart no that's you're absolutely right that's information that you need to know if he's not giving that to you that's really bad ad for you and for your health. So you went looking, how did you find that he had responded to Craigslist ad? Was it in his phone or how did you get access to that? Well, I think the first thing that I found was it was on his computer, actually. We have a shared computer that we used and his e-mail. He had left it signed in. He leaves it signed in all the time.

It's never an issue. Guys are so dumb. Yeah, he had two email accounts, though, and I knew that. So I never thought, I need to check this one. This is his work email. It's, you know, it's more serious, whatever. Right. That would be the one you wouldn't be likely to look at.

There was one time where I went to use the computer and I typed Gmail instead of Google. And one of the, you know how does it auto fill thing? Yeah. Mm-hmm. visited pages. One of the things that came up was a response to a Craigslist ad that was, you know, meet up, question mark. And when I looked into that, I found he had deleted that email, but I did find some other really suspicious and some really just blatant stuff. He had replied to one ad that had been titled something to the effect of, are you a professional

guy who's too busy for a girlfriend? And the reply that he had given was, I'm very interested I would like to ask you a question, though, is anal on the table because that's very important to me. Oh, God. Let me ask you a question, and nobody knows who you are, so hopefully you'll answer, and I hope this isn't like a invasion of your privacy. But do you guys have anal sex with him? Is this something that you allow him to do? Yeah.

Oh, okay. Yeah, that's not. So it's not like you deny that, right, that's a little, right, because it's not like you deny him. And he's going somewhere else to look for him. She's a three-input girl. You're not denying him that input, but that's something that he's, did you know that that was something he was really into? He's never expressed that to me.

You know, it's always sort of like a suggestion that comes up like, hey, would you like to? And he's like, oh, no, don't worry about it. It's so much, you know, effort and work, which, I mean, it is a little bit of effort, but, you know, I'm of the opinion that if you're with somebody and they like a certain thing, they're not going to stop liking it just because you don't do it, and then they may go look for it somewhere else. Right. If it's not terrible to you, then, you know, do it.

Yeah, you're smart. Right, right. You give your man what he wants so that he doesn't need to go do these things behind your back. Right. I mean, as long as it doesn't compromise anything about your sexuality, why not. Exactly. And that's fine with me. So I guess I just don't understand what he's looking for and why he does this.

And there was actually, after, you know, after I found these things, I did a little digging and he does save passwords and stuff, so I used his safe passwords to log into other accounts. And I found some really awful stuff. Tommy's like shaking his head. No, I think you're impressed by her and you think he's in a moron. Yeah, go on. There was one time where we had sex and he rolled over after we were done

and five minutes later sent an email to a girl on Craigslist, complimenting her on her kids. On her what? on her tits right after how do you know that it was right after you guys had sex because you looked at the time and the day yeah i mean like gmail keeps a pretty you know the time a very timely record of everything that you do you know right it's time stamped so there's nothing that you do that's flying under the radar on gmail so you remembered when you saw that one that he commented on the tits you remembered that that was the night or day whatever that you had just had sex yeah because it was

it was the very next morning that I saw it. Oh, so after you started to get a hint that stuff was going on, or actually you knew for a fact, did you just start checking on a daily basis and you didn't let him know that you knew anything? Yeah, that's what I'm doing now because he's still in a denied, deny, deny sort of mode, and I haven't actually found anything that has said that he has acted on any of this, which is sort of what I'm waiting for.

You know, it's... Tommy looks surprised, but no, Tommy. Listen, let me tell you. one thing. Tommy, you look surprised, but remember, we get a lot of calls from guys on Craigslist, right? And a lot of guys, like, because I'm always telling these guys, because most of them are looking for women. You're not going to find women on Craigslist. Like, no woman needs to go on Craigslist to get lead. You know what I mean? And most of these guys tell me that they're out there looking, and all they get is replies from gay men. Do you understand? Like, there's

no, unless they're like escorts or girls that are like professional, there's no girls, regular girls, really looking. I mean, most of these guys tell me they go on there looking for girls, but they don't get anything. They get solicited by guys. I mean, they're fake emails from girls, but there are,

they're not many girls. What girl do you know, Tommy? That would be on Craigslist looking for a dude. No way. No way. But my thing is, what you said before,

you know, you're going to wait to see if he acts on anything. No, she doesn't, she's waiting for actual proof. You obviously believe he's probably acted because of those, all those times he's been out, right?

Marla? I'm not exactly sure, you know, because he'll come home and he doesn't, he's not disheveled, you know. I mean, it's not like he's got smells of somebody else on him or something. Yeah, but they take showers. I know, but there's something. They take showers. So anyway, so you're waiting for actual proof. And what were you going to say, Tommy?

What's actual proof when she gets an STD or, you know what I mean? Right. What would be proof to you? That's horrible. Proof to me would be that I see that he makes a plan with someone, like a concrete plan, I'm going to do this. And then he tells me, oh, hey, I'm going to go out now. And then I'm just going to confirm and say, I know where you're going.

This is not okay. This is done. Right. But you looked on his phone. Have you seen text with that? You said that you saw a dick pick, right? And you saw a picture where he blacked out a picture of your face of you guys having sex. And you don't have proof that he sent it out.

But were those pictures just on his phone? phone? Yeah, those pictures were on his phone and the fact that he had blacked out my face and left in his, some stuff, that's like a huge betrayal. You know what I mean? That's just kind of, like, ever since I found that, because I just found that the day that I emailed you actually. So, you know, some of this is a lot more recent.

Like, the more serious stuff is, you know, within the last 48 hours. Oh, you're kidding. So just two days ago is when you started to, when you first got the first inkling. And now you've gotten all this other hardcore information? Yeah, pretty much. Like before the last 48 hours, I wasn't reading his email and I didn't see all this stuff. I just had a bad feeling. Uh-huh.

And I wasn't able to quantify it in any way or explain it in any way. It was just you're acting different. And I don't know what's going on. Right. And now you kind of do. Now those emails that you saw going out on Craigslist, did you ever see anything coming in back from those emails where he was soliciting the people in writing to them? did you ever see them replying? Yes, he's actually speaking to a woman right now.

It's probably a dude, trust me. God, I hope so. Yeah, trust me. I sincerely hope if anything like that ever happens and he does go out to meet someone that he shows up and it's just a dude. Well, no, I was wondering if he was soliciting dudes because I was like no guy is going to find women.

Like is there a chance, you know, but then, you know, Tommy was like, Kathy, he's not going to like send a picture of him having sex with a woman to a, guy, really, right? If he was looking for gay sex because you just don't know. Right. I think guys are just so dumb. They actually think they're going to find real live girls on Craigslist that want to have sex with them that aren't either charging for it or aren't trannies with a little wean underneath their skirt. Like there's just no girls on there looking for sex. He's in the wrong place. So what's going

on with his emails to the girl on Craigslist now? Well, today, most of the day, they kind of just did a little Liddy Banser back and forth, but then he made some comments about meeting up together and made some comments about, oh, hey, can I call you on the phone tonight? So he's escalating. I mean, he's taking it to the next level with this. Let me ask you this, because you seem very smart, and this is how my mind would think, have you tried to find the initial ad of that girl and text her and email her as a guy the same way your guy is doing? Because, you know, that's what you should really do. Do you understand? I do. Unfortunately, this person to someone that he's speaking to through like the hangouts now and I don't have the original ad or the

original email they've been talking a little bit longer than that yeah so they've been going back and forth and she she seems interested they haven't made a plan yet um she seems it's hard to say that she seems interested because she keeps putting him off he is the one who's in visit hey let's meet let's do this let's do that yeah she's a dude she's not even a she's not a she's not a she's not a she's not a she it's a he he he doesn't understand trust me that's why she's putting it off and were there pictures have they sent each other pictures i yes they have seen each other pictures they exchanged some pictures today and he has made references to um she's made some self-deprecating sort of comments like oh well you know ha ha ha i could never be that hopped or something like me said you know oh well

it's a picture that you sent me is really of you i think you're really cute Is that the one that he complimented her tits right after you had sex? Different person. He doesn't talk to Miss Tits anymore. I don't know what may have happened there. Oh, so Mitz Tis was an ongoing email. She probably wasn't a miss. She was a Mr. Tits.

Seriously, trust me. There's no, there's probably no women. I mean, the problem is, you know, there's other places for him to cheat and get, you know what I mean? You know, he's a young guy. you guys probably aren't tied to the hip he could go out with his guy friends and meet a girl in a bar and cheat as well you know This kind of sort of behavior is You know a whole other level, but I think some guys unfortunately get into the whole I don't know you tell us I think this is just the tip of the iceberg

I mean if he's so brazen to be able to just Do this from home leave it on his computer It's not brazen I think it's stupidity well I think some guys are just so dumb like he's he's Like you guys have a good relationship, right? I mean, have there been problems in your relationship? I guess outside of the fact that I don't trust him. We don't really have that many problems. You've never trusted him before all this stuff?

I did, but I mean, this is, I don't want to say this is the first time that something like this has ever happened. He has also had female friends that he didn't meet through Craigslist. but then he knew and then he got inappropriate photos of and had inappropriate conversations with. Right, that's what I mean. Right. So it's not just like he doesn't just need to go to Craig. Like there's other things. So how do you know that there was inappropriate photos with his female friends? Can you repeat that?

How did you find out about the inappropriate photos with the female friends? He did something similar, actually. We've been living together for a while almost two years now. And there was one night when, And I went to bed early. And he didn't come, you know, he didn't come to bed with me. Which is fine, whatever. And, but I got up later because it was three hours or still later. Just to check, like, hey, you know, are you coming to bed? You got to go to work tomorrow.

Let's do this. And he, you know, when I went out to see what he was doing, he closed everything on his computer very quickly and had, like, a semi. And he was just, like, playing with himself a little bit. Oh, my. All right. So, but maybe he was. looking at porn. I thought so, but I just, I had a feeling, you know what I mean?

Uh-huh. I just had, I guess, I was married before this, and I was with the guy who did a lot of the same sort of shit, so anytime I see this, I always check. Oh, okay, right. She knows. You know what's going on. Right, right. So how long?

No, but wait, so what happened? I'm trying to find out how she found out about the friend picture. So what happened that night? Well, he went to bed, and the next day, I looked at. this computer and he had um he had logged out of his email but he had opened a photo that he had sent him in an email and that had that was in his temporary internet files and i opened it up boom girl with the boobs out you know like another miss tits or the original mistits this was a different one yeah i guess the original miss tits the original one so that this is but there's been

other and this was a friend of his for sure and did you confront him on it i confronted her because I knew her. Oh, God. Was she your friend or his friends? Or both of your friends? Um, sort of both of our friends. She knew him first and had known him longer. But, you know, we became friends.

And what happened when you confronted them? Just a second. Sure. All right. When I confrited him, he was very angry that I had looked, as any man will do when you catch him in something fucked up. Of course. He decided to try to turn it around and be like, you should never.

I've checked my things. This is my private email. This is whatever, whatever. Right. I just wasn't having any of it. I was kind of like, that doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. If what I did was wrong, fine.

But you have really fucked up. You should not have been doing any of this. And then what happened? He admitted it. He said, you know, he was like, I'm sorry. I confronted her. I told her exactly what was going on. Like, say, I live with this guy now.

I don't know if he ever told you that. He's in a committed relationship. And at that point, she was very, turned off to him as well. And I was like, look, you need to give me the password to your email. I needed to be on the up and up with me from this point on. And he did? He did for a while.

And then what? He switched his password? Yeah, then he changed his password. Oh, my God. That's a guy. He just won't stop. Yeah, but it's been long enough now, right? I mean, you don't have to check up on me anymore.

And since it had been, you know, a decent amount of time, I just let it slide and obviously I should not have. And you were married before with another guy who cheated on you like crazy. Oh, yeah. So, okay. So you're obviously with another guy who is a cheater, right? Do you believe that he's a cheater or do you actually think that he's not a cheater? I don't think that he has yet.

You don't think he has yet. Right. How do you feel like, say your guy, let me ask you this, because everybody's different and I believe everyone makes up their own rules. I don't think that there's rules out there that everyone has to follow because everyone else has their own moral compass, right? So for you, okay, if your guy is just emailing Miss Tits and saying you have nice tits after you have sex

and just sending dick pics to girls and just emailing with them, but not having sex with them, would that be okay with you? No. Okay, because that's what he's doing. Like, he's really doing that now. So. Oh, I confronted about that a couple of days ago, but because I didn't take any pictures of the emails that he spent out.

He just denied, deny, yeah. And listen, that would be, you know, if your boyfriend was my friend, okay, like we all know, like say you're on his side, right, and you're him, like, that's the right thing to do. Like, he's doing, you know, you're right now like on opposite teams, right? So, like, you're trying to get him to admit something and he doesn't want to admit it. So, of course he's going to deny, deny, deny. And you're smart enough to know that you need that hardcore proof and you need to really put it in his face because he'll deny as much as he can.

You have hard evidence on him already, and he's denied it, and you're still there with him. You know, so he knows he could keep getting away with it because you've kind of let him get away with all the stuff. Like, you say that it would bother you, and it's not cool if he's sending dickpicks and emailing girls sexually and talking to them. And that's what he's doing,

and he's been doing it for a while, especially even with people that you know. And unfortunately, there's just so many guys out there that are like that. Like, I mean, it's not like, You know, this is not something that a lot of girls don't deal with. I mean, this is a common problem. Let me ask you this. Do you love him?

Of course she does. Yeah, I do, actually. And I feel so stupid, honestly, because I moved to the city for him. And, you know, as soon as I got here, I've been living with him. And he has helped me improve my life a great deal. And we've had conversations about having a child, which is something I never wanted before. But don't feel stupid. It's not you.

And most guys would tell you, and Tommy's sitting here and he would tell you that all that stuff that he's doing with those other people is very different than what he's doing with you. Unfortunately, guys are just very different. I hate, like, monogamy. I need for a man to be monogamous, and I would be exactly like you and everything with everything. But I hate the fact that as women, we're raised to believe that men are these, like, totally monogamous creatures when most of the time they're just not. I mean, like honestly, so it's hard to, as a woman, to accept. that both things exist, that he really loves you, but he's just like using these girls on the side to just have new pussy. That's what it's about. Like when you said, you said earlier, like, I don't understand if I give him sex and I do this, like why he goes and does it. I think any man and Tommy, like, what it is about them is just like something different at something new. And it has nothing to do with love or feelings. It's very different for a man, right, Tommy? Like, does it necessarily mean that her guy doesn't love her that he's doing this? No, I don't think he doesn't love you. I think he's just searching for some kind of a rush. This is all like a little bit of a rush for him.

The secretness and, you know, like the taboo of it. And but, you know, my, like I said before, my fear for you is you become accepting, okay, he's just, you know, whatever. She's not accepting it. Well, I mean, she lets it go. She lets it go. And then he actually has done something and catches something. Comes home and gives it to her. They're not having protected sex.

Have you gotten yourself checked for everything? I'm sorry? Have you gotten yourself checked for STDs? I haven't had any done yet, but I am planning to as soon as the new year comes up because with my insurance, I only have like one battery of tests per year. Right. Well, you should definitely do that and maybe start using condoms with him. Yeah, that's what I think is going to be my suggestion.

I don't want to say let's not have sex because I feel like that would just push him away further. Oh, he'd be gone. Right, but. I have to tell him something like, I don't. trust you we can't do this as we're doing it now. Right. But is the reason why, because you sound like a really smart together girl, you've been married before you left that guy,

you started a new relationship. Is the reason why you're sort of putting up with it because you have, like you're living together and you're financially a little strapped to him? Like if you had a lot of cash, right, and you could walk out and just totally take care of yourself and get a great apartment in New York and everything. Like, would you leave him now without that proof? Yeah, I would tell him to fuck off.

I would show him. Everything that I have seen and I would leave today. Right. But you're not doing it because our apartment is fantastic and I have decorated and it's beautiful. Right. So, you know, for you, it's more about that. It's not like you're still. And I totally understand that.

That's you're a realest. Like you're just not going to go out and be homeless. You need the money. So you're being tactical right now and smart, not bringing it up. Because I know you said in the email like, do I bring this up? I know that this is going to like kill my relationship. At a certain point, it will, it can end it when you bring, you know, you so you need to start sort of if you you know if you're going to be looking and and and still bringing this up and

looking through all this stuff you have to also start setting up an exit plan for yourself in case things go bust or he admits it and you need to walk out like whether it's financially making yourself stable get an aside job something so that you could eventually you know do what you want to do from your heart instead of you know out of like you know just because security you you need to get your fair your affairs in order and like kathy said you have to to have an exit plan because you're going to keep... Before she pushes him away. Yeah, but you know, you're going to look and...

But the reality is you're going to find something that would kind of say this is over the line, you know? I think everything she's found... I mean, I'm going to say is over the line. And she's not leaving him because she... First of all, it's hard to leave someone you've been with for a long time. Nobody likes to break up. It's just devastating.

It sucks. Second, she's tied to him financially. So she can't in a way. You know what I mean? there's a lot of stuff that would have to change. She's, you know, her life is tangled with his. So when, so, you know, what's going to happen is, to me, what's worse is that you'll find out there's proof and you won't be able to leave.

And now you're with a guy who, you know, for a fact, has cheated on you and you can't go. And that starts to fuck with your self-esteem. You know what I mean? Because it's like, that's not who you really are. That's not who you want to be, right? That's not like what an independent strong woman would do. But you're, you have to do it because.

you're tied to him financially or these other little things, but it starts to fuck with your head. And it's also not good for your self-esteem as a woman when you start to think that your man is like interested in other women sexually. It starts to make you think like what's wrong with me, you know, and that's just not good. You don't need to go there, you know. And that's the mind fuck for yourself that you're in right now. But you have to kind of, I don't know what the advice is. This is like, does she, you know, until you're really ready to leave him, like I would say stop looking, maybe try, but how do you not look when you know?

I would go mental. Yeah. Right, but you need to then, is there something that you could, if you found out that for sure he was cheating on you, would you be prepared to leave him? Could you leave him? Financially, I would be, it would be very difficult,

but if I found this week today that was a definite, like this has happened, I would go home right now and sit there and wait for him to come home and telling him you need to pack your things and you need to leave. Oh, so you would make him leave. Oh, yeah, absolutely. He can't afford the rent on his own.

I can. So he would leave. Oh, all right. So wait. So I'm confused. So you're financially fine. You're okay to be able to have your apartment. So it's not that you're not leaving him because of financially you can't afford to be without him.

I mean. It would be hard, right? It would be difficult financially for me because, you know, I do have a certain amount of stability that's provided because he does contribute with the rent and with some of the bills. You know, and I would be giving that up, you know, and it would become, I would definitely need to

probably realistically have at least a part-time job. Right. On the side. But you would have no problem throwing him out. But you couldn't throw him out without the proof. Is that what you're saying? I could. Could you throw him out now with the proof that you have? Can you repeat that? Can you throw

him out now with the proof that you have? No, probably not. until probably not for a couple of months. Why? Well, specifically this month, since I just found this out a couple of days ago, we haven't actually paid our rent yet.

Right. Right. So it's just complicated. It's technical things that you would have to do. You have some time, but eventually you're going to find something more hardcore, or you're just going to be so sick of being mental because this kind of life that you're living right now

being like a private detective in your spare time and not getting paid for it is irritating. We've all been there as women, you know. Eventually you wind up dating someone that cheats on you and you find out and you know and you become distrustful and, you know, I've been in relationships like that and it's a terrible, it's terrible place to be. It drives you crazy. Do you know what I mean?

And you're not the crazy one. He's the one that just can't control himself. Maybe he shouldn't be in a relationship. He needs, you know, he's not being honest. But he definitely, you know, is cheating or is, you know, moving along those lines. or I don't know, maybe you need to have an honest conversation with him and say, hey, listen, are you just into, like, emailing these people? Like, what is his reason for sending dick, pick?

Did you bring up the dick pick to him? I actually brought up the dick pick thing, and I was like, why would you have this on your phone? What is the explanation for this? And he really wasn't able to provide me with any kind of explanation that made sense. He sort of redirected the conversation, which unfortunately I did not notice at the time. But, you know, like I brought up the,

the uh yeah maybe he was posting his own ad maybe he was yeah the picture of you maybe he was posting his own ad and he included the dick pick in his own ad or he was sending that dick pick out to these you know quote unquote women that he thinks he's emailing on craigslist these trannies that he's emailing and he's sending them pictures of his dick and they're not you know that's probably what he was doing with those pictures yeah i couldn't tell you you know my problem is that he is leaving for hours at a time it's not just this evidence on his phone and stuff you have physical Is it like, you know, he's physically, like, disappearing at times. He's going somewhere.

Yeah, and he's doing this texting. You don't know about that texting on his phone is different than the Craigslist. Like, there's somebody that he's engaging with a lot on, you know, and then he's leaving for hours at a time. So he's doing something during that. And I know on some level you know that, but you not having that full proof is giving you a little time. And I understand. Do your friends know this deal? Like, who do you talk to about this besides, like, with us right now?

Um, there is only one person that I have told about this. And, uh, it's just a friend of mine who lives in, uh, neighboring state. She just lives close by. What does she think? Leave. You know, they're saying capital letters leave. Yeah. Of course.

And that, but I understand like, I mean, everyone, it's really easy for people to just say leave. Right. Yeah. No, it's easy to say that. And eventually you probably will because, you know, unless this guy really changed, you and turns over a new leaf like he's not it's not gonna it's nothing's gonna be different what about lining up I don't know what type of an apartment it is but what about lining up a friend or a roommate to move in she's fine if he moves out right you

have a one we just have a one bedroom apartment oh okay so any sort of configuration it would be somebody is sleeping in my living room yeah that's weird you know I don't know if anyone would agree to that or but if you had to ask a question from us. Like what advice are you looking for? Like what is the question at this point now that you know since you last email me you found even worse stuff? Where's your head out? Like what's your question now? I guess my question is when when men, why do men do these things? Because I mean you guys said it was a very common problem. I believe that. That's why Tommy's here. Tommy tell her. No, I like I said, if it's if he's not getting something at home, he's going to go get it up. elsewhere. No, but he is, but wait, let me finish. But he is getting something at home. And I believe that it's the adrenaline, the whole rush of going on and, and, and the taboo

of seeing these girls and, you know, the secret. But what about just new pussy? Tommy, any, I have a lot of guys that are my friends. It's, it's just about someone new. Women are, men are different, right? Tommy. Well, that's the third thing. And it's just maybe he wants to sleep with just other people.

Right. Let me give you a little. information moral about Tommy. Tommy was a full-fledged cheater. Your girl's never going to listen to this. I told you. He was a full-fledged cheater. He was totally this guy. So he's talking about the Russian stuff because Tommy was really into that. But there's other guys that cheat and they're doing it just because it's somebody new and they're just wired that way. Tommy and you know that. No, they are. I mean, everybody wants variety. That's right? Yeah. Right. I mean, especially at, you know, at a younger age, I mean, they want it more.

And it changes a little bit when you get older. But, you know, I believe that he's doing something, you know. Right, but she wants to know why. Like, will you let her know that it has nothing to do? For people to say, oh, he's not getting it at home so he's going out. Most of the time, that's not the case. They could be having great sex, but it's just, you know, been there, done that. It's three years later, you know, right?

Tommy, isn't it just realistic that this guy's doing that? But it has nothing to do with their relationship. He loves her. But it's just something new on the side. Yeah, I would agree. with that right don't be like remember i know you tommy for your be real tommy now like you're not married with a baby tommy okay it's so boring like we know you're like this guy you were this guy that she's with so when you had girlfriends that you were in love with and you were cheating on them what were

you cheating for and did you still love those girls absolutely but you want that variety you want something else you know you right why did i have to pull that out of you our callers are more honest than you Tommy like be i mean i i learned these things from you and from my other guy friends. No, but I mean, they want to feel like they're still free and they can still sleep with that girl that they see and they want to and they want to experience it. Does that mean that you don't love the girl at home? No, it doesn't mean that you don't love the girl at home, but obviously there's a respect level.

You know what I mean? So you just had no respect for any of the girls you dated? At certain times, it was just like I had my own issues and, you know, if you were very respectful for that person that you were dating obviously you wouldn't be doing that's not true then you had no respect for anyone because you cheated on all of your girlfriends not all of them yes all of them sorry marla I know Tommy thinks he's gonna sit here and lie on our pot see how guys are Marla Stephanie they all lie Tommy's even lying now for no reason I'm not even his girlfriend this has nothing to do with anything we're talking 10

years from now and he still doesn't want to come clean this is how ridiculous they are deny, deny, deny. You're right. That's what they do. Tommy can't even cop to his shit and give you. Yeah, it's ridiculous. I have him on here as a co-os. He could be giving you valuable information,

but I'm going to tell you what I know from Tommy and my other guys that cheat, that it has nothing to do with respect or anything. Sometimes it's just, I mean, I think it's disrespectful, right? And, you know, it's, I think that they lack empathy in a certain way because they don't actually are on thinking about the girl's, you know, point of view or how she's feel. Yeah, that they are. but they're doing it and they're just wired to do it and they have a drive to do it. And it's a terrible thing for women because, you know, we have this fantasy that men are going

to be really monogamous. And I'm very anti-men. I hate that we're born in a society that as women were told that like men are monogamous and that's what we sort of aspire to. I wish we grew up in a in a place and time. For me, I want to be born 500 years from now as a woman. Never will I come back as a woman until monogamy has been squashed and we're all raised with polygamy or whatever it is.

So we don't have these ridiculous things. We're not devastated, you know, because the majority of men cheat and it sucks. But there's guys out there that don't cheat. And there's guys out there that would never, you know, that would never make you feel the way you're feeling now. Sometimes we attract people like that, but sometimes it's just, it's a numbers game, okay? And it's like the majority of men are like that. So the fact that you have two guys like that, it doesn't necessarily mean you have a pattern.

It's just like a lot of guys are like that and younger guys and just the way that it is. So I don't think it's that he doesn't love you. I don't think it's that you're not good and bad. You know, it's none of those things. It's just that it's something new. Do you have guy friends? I mean, ask them. They'll tell you the same shit.

That's what they tell me, and I believe it. Well, I guess that's sort of comforting, but sort of not. It's not going to take away your feelings. It's not me, but it's the numbers game. Yeah, nothing's going to take the sting out of what's going on. No, like I said, I can't stand monogamy, but it does, I would be the same way that you are. I can't accept it, right? But I hate that it exists and that we have this kind of unrealistic expectation.

And women are always, you know, disappointed and men just being men. You know, we've had other men on here that we talk about with cheating. And there was a great article in GQ magazine about a guy who cheats. And he gave like a full-fledged answer. It was like a really great article. We're going to put it on our Facebook page about why men cheat. And, you know, and it was like what he said was what I hear from most guys. And it has nothing to do with his wife and his family,

but it's just the thrill of the chase and all the things that Tommy said. and that's the way it is. But once you know, I think, like this guy, you know, I think the respect comes in, Tommy, not that he's cheating, it's that he's so sloppy about it. That's the thing that I have the problem with. You know what I mean? Yeah, I am, that offends me as well

because to be honest with you, I'm pretty smart and I'm pretty resourceful. And the fact that you can't hide it better makes me so angry. Exactly. Like, exactly. Like keep your phone, you know, be, be like on some level. Be discreet.

Exactly. And he's not. And that's where I find him to be. So that's like what's so disrespectful to me. And that just might be because he's stupid. I don't know. But that doesn't work for you because you're too smart. I come from an Italian family.

And, you know, in my family we have cheaters. We have people that we know. They have a woman who is like your check. The gumma. The gumma. The gumma. Tommy had them. We're a gumma. And you have to be discreet.

I mean, that's above all else. If you're going to do it, do it. Fine. Whatever. Just don't ever let me have to find out about it. Exactly. Don't put me through that. If you had any respect for me, that will be what you would do. Yeah, I had a really good friend who was a massive professional cheater. And when he started to hook up with someone to have a serious relationship, I was like, whatever you, that's fine. You're going to still want to cheat on her. Cheat on her in another country. Cheat on her in, you know, with, you know, with, you know, hookers or like, you know, get a happy ending out of a suit, you know, but don't do it like in, you know, know with your friends or people that she's going to know but he would do that and not to me is like the worst kind of cheating like why why would you do why is he sending pictures to your friends why is he doing it with people that you would know why is he sloppy on his computer you know yeah but so

he's you know he's just ruining it it's there's no way it's uh it's gonna work for you there's something he could probably do at this point to change your mind you'll just go crazy and do this until you've had enough or until you get that proof because there's no way you're going to not look so I mean, Tommy's advice to you, which he's not telling you, is that he's doing it because he's just a guy. And that's unfortunately what sometimes guys do when they're young and they can't control their libido. Yeah, and you want variety. Yeah, they want variety.

They're different than us. We don't need variety. Women are very different. So, but it doesn't make it, it doesn't make it right. It doesn't make it something that's, you know, you shouldn't have your feelings about. You know, this is the biggest problem between men and women, you know? And it happens all the time. He hasn't responded to my ad yet to call in.

But, you know, I would just say, like, our advice to you is like, you know, wait until, you know, start making your plan for the ending of your relationship while you keep looking and make sure that you take care of yourself. You know, and figure out, you know, your plan for yourself and your plan of attack once you eventually know. Because he's sloppy and he's kind of dumb and he's, he's event, you're eventually, and you sound really smart and you're. eventually going to figure it all out. Yeah, thanks. I guess I mean I've extricated myself from a marriage. I guess it's just the same procedure all over again, you know? Yeah. And you're young, you're only 28. They'll be another guy and, you know, they'll be a better guy, hopefully, you know, maybe third time's the term. Yeah, you know, there's, there are, that's the whole thing. There are good guys out there that don't cheat. It's not like every guy's like that. I know, I have tons of guy friends that really don't cheat. They would never

cheat and you know that guy when you meet him you know what I mean it's it's most of the time the player like Tommy was always an obvious player to me my friends that cheated they're like obvious you know you could tell that kind of guy sometimes they're not so obvious though so but you know um eventually if this ends you'll be okay

you're still young but keep us posted what we do is after we do our podcast we eventually have um where are they now call where we want to see how you do it and see what happens so if anything big comes in here you get that big evidence or something and you want to call in again and let me know. And we'll talk to you again, but good luck with everything.

Thanks. Sounds good. Okay, Stephanie, don't look too much. You might not like what you find. Fair enough. Okay? All right. Keep us posted.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye. Poor thing. Yeah. Poor thing. I mean, what more evidence do you need? The evidence that I will.

Okay. Right. No, I know. She has all the evidence. This is what it is. is with women, Tommy. This is about women. She knows she could get rid of them, but she said it right there. She's tied to that. You know what it is. You're in an apartment. I mean, at her age, when I got out of college, I was living with a girl in an apartment that I was dating, and I wanted

to get rid of her so bad, but I couldn't. Where was I going to go live? That's what I mean. So I understand that. But she also just doesn't want to, no one wants that ending. No one, even if it's, you know what I mean? No one wants to go, even though she has all of the events. I get it. She, especially somebody who already was divorced. She had another cheater. It's like for her to really sort of admit to herself, that truth to herself, that she is in the same exact situation and she's been fucked over. It's so devastating that she's just going to break down and not be able to function. And really does you think she wants to do that through the holidays?

I totally get it. Yeah. You know, and that to me is more realistic than like, you know, I mean, you'd read an article in Cosmo and they'd be like, your guy cheats. So they'd walk out and do this. And that's what an independent woman does. But like, in real life, it's more common that people. and women and men, they stay in bad things for a while because nobody wants to break up. It's like devastating and depressing.

When we do call her back, what's your prediction? Oh, she'll get her proof and she'll have that that relationship will not last. I don't think. But you never know. Some people, like, you know, you don't know. Some people are like masochistic and they stay. She could stay for another year and she's looking and she's going mental. I told you I had a boyfriend who literally I caught him cheating because he was out

the night before and and I the day that he finally came back he was gone the whole day and I saw him and I went over at his house and I went to blow him and I swear this is in my book too chapter 17 big dick nick was his name he his wean smelled like another woman and I said are you kidding me you know and he like me he blew it off and this was a guy that I didn't think was a cheater and he looked in my face and said I would never do that to you I love you and like two weeks later and I said okay and then we continue to have sex and then like two weeks later the phone started to ring and it was a girl and it was the girl that he was with and it turned out and he admitted to me because i had i took the phone from his hand and talked to this girl that that night he had went into the city gave her flowers they had sex he didn't

even have at least this guy she says she has no smells and shit he's taking a shower at least her guy takes show my guy didn't even take a shower okay and then wait this is the most messed up thing i stayed with him okay no you i know why because i treated him like shit for like a good year. I never really wanted to date him and I was always pushing him away and then I eventually got him. No, I'd never wanted him and then he decided to eventually say, oh, you know, I met this new girl and I was like, yeah, whatever. Like I thought he was actually lying about it, but he actually did and it was this girl and he started to like date her and I was like, uh-uh, like this guy was like obsessed with me. I was like finally like, okay, I'll date you now. Just break up with her and he said okay. And I always felt like,

oh, you know, and he didn't. He continued to date her. So I felt like it was my fault. Like somehow I rationalize it in my mind to stay in the relationship. And I stayed and I became like a complete psychopath, just CIA detective, distrustful, lunatic. And it's not a good way to be. It's terrible. No, not at all. No.

And that phone thing, nowadays with texting and everything, it's just so obvious when a guy's taking the phone into the bathroom, a guy's taking it into the bathroom when you're at the movies. I take my phone into the bathroom with me because I read the paper on the phone. Right. But, you know, nowadays when you have these apps where you can actually see if someone's online texting at the same time. You know what I mean?

Yeah. You know, and what is it? Like, unless your guy has a shitting problem, there's no reason for your guy to always be going to take like 20-minute bathroom, like, stops all over town, you know? I have had guys like that. And it's like, duh, you think I'm stupid. I don't know you're going into the bathroom to text another girl.

It's like it's what happens. It's what the number one sign. So she has all the signs. He's definitely cheating on her. It's obvious that he has cheated on her already. The poor thing. I think she doesn't want to admit it because she's not ready to leave. her mind will, she's in denial.

Her mind will allow her to face it when she's really ready to get up all the strength. And no one wants to do that before the holidays. No. It's the worst time. Yeah, she's not going to do it. She'll let that come in when she has the strength to go through the massive depression and devastation of the breakup. It's terrible. But this is why I really do hate the whole monogamy guy thing because like I know you want to be like old married man now.

But you're Tommy that has, you're a full person that has. No, I have a past. You're a married man and you were that guy. So you could talk to both things. No, no, no. I have a past. Okay, but like I can't take that. Like, I have people calling up and being so honest.

No one knows who you are. And you're on here like not copping to shit because you're, you're trying to be somebody else. That's who you were in the past. And you could shed light on that because you're a real normal guy that was very much a cheater. Yeah. No, I was a player. Yeah, a player, whatever you want to call it. So, you know, you could talk to those guys, the regular guy.

A lot of guys are like that. You could have really helped this girl. I had to, like, drag it out of you. Oh, I don't say that. No, it's true. Okay. You say, oh, does your leg hurt? Tommy's standing up and he's stretching.

He is kind of old. You really are like an old married man. Like, you think I was more fun when I drank? I think you were more fun as a player. Thanks. Like, seriously, that's what you always make fun of me, that I was like so much hotter and greater when I was wasted drunk. I think you were like, you were like, you were. were more interesting when you were a player.

This whole married act is like... Act? Well, it's not an act, but you know, it's a little bit like, don't be like you don't have like you weren't this other person. That's it. Okay. So, um, that's that. I don't know who our next caller is. I'm so glad we finally had a woman. I was right

by the way. You could tell she was intelligent. She was responsible. Remember I said that before? She was really smart. I could tell. Remember I told you by her emails? I could tell. She was a real together girl. She had it all together. She did. She had Fortunately, date the scumbags like we all do. You can't help it as a woman. You're going to walk down the street and you're getting me to scumbag.

It's just employment and it goes. I'm not, I really sound like a man hater. No, I'm not. No, I love men. I think men and women are different. I know that guys do that and I don't think that they're bad people. I don't even think her boyfriend's bad. I think he probably loves her just the way that they are.

It's just a dilemma. I was born at the wrong time of woman. I should have been born a man. First of all, I'd be way more popular with my personality. I'm so opinionated and allowed. If I was a guy, I'd be like the mayor of the town and people would love me as a woman and not so much. So I was just born the wrong sex at the wrong time.

So that's it. So, you know, we'll check in on her at another time and hopefully we'll get more girls. It was nice to finally talk to a female. Don't forget to follow us on Twitter and our Facebook page and the email again, Kathy. It's strictly, and not listen to this, Tommy, so you remember it, strictly anonymous podcast at gmail. All right. Bye-bye. Okay, bye. Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available, not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out

until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talked about on my show like there's a hot wife story there's a cuck queen story there's a cuck story there's a gang being girl story like i said 17 stories and they're all told in the third person and they're all true i took the interview and rewrote it in the third person and i wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book think like penthouse letters it's more direct it's not so over the top like erotica i don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories, 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book.

It's available in eback format, paperback format, and finally, the audiobook is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not. not disappoint. Okay. There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay. I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other. And that's what you get to do there. You can post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total, strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my

Discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook, or the paperback. Send it to me at Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. or situation you can't talk about to anyone, to anyone? Or do you just want to let your freak flag fly? And be on the show. Well, Strictly Anonymous wants to hear from you.

Send us an email, Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com, with your story and your anonymous name. And remember, everything is strictly anonymous. Strictly anonymous.