Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 039 - Male Escort Dirty Ramone Has a Lot Going On

Episode Date: September 15, 2014

Dirty Ramone has a lot going on. He's been a dominatrix, a male escort, he's done porn, and heroin, he's been incarserated, he has multiple personalities and he's an artist/musician. He says he does this all because he's "bored" and he likes variety but maybe he's doing it for another reason? Listen in as Kathi and guest co-host comedian Robert Kelly try to get to the real reason he is so all over the place.    **To see anonymous pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. Craigslist is definitely the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it. The temptation is just too much.

Real problem. Does your friend know that you're banging her? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your reflect lie. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-hide your whips and chain. Here are your hosts, Kathy Kay and Tommy.

Hey, welcome to this podcast, and I have a really good show, I think, here today. I don't do, I'm here with Robert Kelly. I'm just going to go right off. He's my co-host this week, and I'm very excited to have him on. And you were the one Robert that told me that I need to do an upbeat intro. And it's very hard for me to be upbeat. Was that just upbeat? No.

No. Okay, can you tell me how I should do it? You ready? Yeah. Okay, I'll do, I'll show you my intro as my co-hosts. Okay, hang on a second, ready? Okay. What's up, everybody?

This is Robert Kelly. You're listening to the, you know what, dude, podcast slash strictly anonymous. We have a great show for you today. Oh, my God, I can't tell you how happy I am to have these people on it. I got Kathy, K, kitty porn, fucking, whatever her name is. And then I got some fucking weirdo coming on that's going to be awesome. That's how I'd introduce the show. Okay, that's good.

But it's funny that you put your podcast name before my podcast name. I didn't have your sweeper. Oh, okay. Anyway. I know, I can't, honestly, I can't do that. And now without Tommy, he used to do it. It's like it's hard for me to be upbeat. I think it's fine.

I think, you know what I learned? I learned about podcasting is people love, people love different vibes. My show's crazy. But then people love like, I love NPR. I love how fucking slow. and, oh, NPR can be. Right. It's very droney to me.

So I don't think that you have to follow it. Okay, so thank God I don't have to be upy. And I don't give my Twitter, even though I should at strict anonymous and go to. You should do all that. I know, subscribe on iTunes, write a review, Stitcher, run, stitcher, blah, blah, blah. I want to get to the guy that we have because this is the weird thing that we're doing today. I'm breaking my rules. And I don't know if that's like a good thing or a bad thing, but it's just a me thing.

You're going to make rules? I like to make rules. I like to break them. You're going to blow me while you're eating carbs? Yeah, only in the dark. Yeah, a gluten-free blowjob. I am doing, like, it normally is strictly anonymous, right? We don't know.

These callers call in, okay? I have a great guy who wrote in. I'm going to read you his long-winded email because there's so many topics you need to help me remember which ones to hit because he's done a lot. Okay. So he says he's worked as a male escort to make ends meet on and off for seven years now. No pun intended? Right, exactly. Have dated some celebrities, more sugar daddy figures slash providers, very prominent ones, okay?

Did amateur porn procured companionship, meaning he's a pimp in layman's terms. Layman's terms. He's dated four dancers from prestigious New York City Gentlemen's Club, had to let them go. In a way, I'm more into girls, but I like what I like. I'm by, I guess. For some reason, I get more of a rush off of cheating on my partner when I'm in a serious relationship. When she gives the blessing for me to cheat, I lose all interest. I'm an artist and very transient.

So sometimes I settle with questionable women way below my standards just for a place to live and some walk around money. I don't know. I got to add that out. Never works out well. I've dated very affluent 47-year-old when I was 23 and now I'm dating an 80-year-old. No, I was dating an 80-year-old last summer. Don't judge me, L.O.L. I do dominatrix stuff for money.

Guys pay me to beat them up and insult them. I've got multiple personalities and depending on the day I could be anyone although when it comes down to it I'm a sweetheart it's all acting at the end of the gym great this guy's coming up into my studio fantastic yeah that's the whole thing no that's the weird thing is that

I'm breaking the veil of what do we want to call that like of anonymity on my show and bringing him into the studio I asked Robert if I could build a partition and hide myself and he said absolutely not I don't know why I'm letting him rule my own podcast here's what you can do okay

I'll tell you why I said absolutely. I didn't say absolutely not. I don't have enough fucking time to do that. I'm not building partitions. I told you I would have brought a garbage bag. I'm not your assistant. You want to put on a garbage bag? Go ahead.

I'll tie a knot around your neck. I wanted to hang it. I can put, what we could put is one of my cheat signs in front of you. Oh, that's what we should do. If you want it. We could do that. But you're just going to have to, all of a sudden robbery came very shy. He doesn't want to go to the door and let the guy in.

I think it's very interesting. This is what I think. It would be very interesting if I don't know what he looks like. You could kind of be the middle person. You could tell me on a scale of one to ten what he is because I always like to ask my callers that because that you have to factor that into shit. It wasn't that. It was my ego.

I didn't want to be your fucking assistant and go downstairs and have to, hey, hi, welcome to the show. I run a network. All right? I'm doing you a favor. So it's just ego. Oh, okay. Well, I'll text him.

Here's a deal. If you want me to. Yeah, we'll figure. That's what we're going to do now. So now that the callers know, okay, we've done our intro. Okay. Because I feel like this is going to be a long call because he has a, and then he texts me the other day to remind him about the Hasidic with the spiny spine or something like that.

I don't know what the fuck this guy does, but he does a lot of stuff. He's been texting me like crazy at all kinds of crazy times. So I think we should just take a break. Yep. Make our partition. So when he comes on the show, I, it's still anonymous. I can't see him, but you can. Okay.

We'll be right back on with Dale is. his name, by the way. On Strictly Anonymous. Yeah, there you go, thanks. Do you have a story, lifestyle, or situation you can't talk about to anyone, to anyone? Or do you just want to let your freak flag fly and be on the show? Well, Strictly Anonymous wants to hear from you. Send us an email, Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com with your story and your anonymous name.

And remember, everything is Strictly Anonymous. Anonymous. Okay, so we're in the studio. We built a partition, like we said. We didn't say his name. His name was Dirty Sanchez. No. Oh, what is it?

Robert Kelly made up name. Dirty Ramone. Oh, Dirty Ramon. Oh, okay. Dirty Ramon is here in the studio. He can't see me. I can't see him, but Robert can see him, which is... I can see both of you.

Yeah, see, it's like... There's a difference. I feel like we're on the dating game. Would we make a good couple? Would we make a good couple? I don't know. I mean, I think he's not a bad looking, dude. Well, okay, honest, normally this is what I ask, and Dirty Ramon, you answer me first,

and then I want Robert's opinion. Robert's really honest, so I think you'll give me. I want to know on a scale of 1 to 10 what he is. Dirty, Roman, what do you give yourself on a scale of 1 to 10? I normally ask my callers this. That's the worst thing in the world. No, because we're both in fucked up, because I'm looking at him and I'm going to have to be honest, and he's going to like, oh, shit, I have to be honest.

No, no, no, and honestly, on a strictly aesthetic, I would go with a six, but it depends on No, I'm kidding. Do you give him a six, too? I guess I'm going to have. I can float you a six. I'd be in the four. Okay, but... Four is the five range.

It's all right. I mean, it depends on what you like. Yeah, everyone's different, you know. Look, if you like records and fucking mopeds, he'd be a six. I don't even get that. If you like fancy cars and rap, yeah, not half a thing. Fucking two and a half.

Okay, but so, but you're, let's start up with the first thing that you say, You're a male escort, right? And you have all these people paying you to, like, screw them and stuff. But you're a five or six and you get paid? I would say this. He is not what I would think physically what a male escort is. If you said, okay, this is what a male escort looks like. I would be like, you're out of your fucking mind.

But it's kind of interesting because in reality, on TV, he wouldn't be cast. But in reality, this is probably what? fucking male escorts look like. Right. I mean, in reality, so it is, it is kind of,

he's like a regular dude. Like, I would never look at this dude and go, male escort. I would look at this guy and go, he is selling cable. Right.

I would look at this guy and go, hey, dude, where's Superman number one? Do you have one of those? Or do you have the arc, break the bat? Or I would say, hey, dude,

do you have any weed? I would do that. I do actually. I would say, when was the last time you molested? No, I'm kidding. All right. So you've been doing, you've been a male escar for over seven years. And when you say male escarer, you mean for dudes, right?

Dudes, sometimes women. It's predominantly dudes, though. I don't get a lot of, you know, when I was younger and cuter, I got a lot more of the older women. But I still bag them occasionally. How old are you now? How old are you now? I'm 29 right now. So you're 20.

And so when you were younger, where would the women find you? Because I've always thought of like, do women, are there, men for women to just come over and fuck them. I think that that's like a lot of women, especially older women, need that. But I don't think it's set up properly for them. Where would they find you? Well, you know what? I would usually meet them on like a, you know, on a very organic

basis in person. Really? Whereas, you know, most of the other stuff goes down via, you know, online sources. Craigslist, etc. For the guys. Exactly. And they pay you. The women, though, you would meet them organically, but then you'd be like, I'll fuck you, but you have to pay me? No, I'd kind of

end up dating them and kind of like a show Bigger mama type of deal. So they get you some sneakers, a TV dinner. Yeah, take me up to Woodbury Common, up to the casino. Buy your bunch of shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're banging chick and getting some stuff out of her. Yeah, what's wrong with that, right?

Well, yeah, no, that is wrong with that. How old is she, though? When I was, let's see, I was 22, I was dating a 47-year-old. It's not bad. No, no, no. And she was very affluent. You said she had a lot of cash, right? She was very affluent.

She owned a number of houses and properties all over there. How old are you now? I'm 29. You're 29. That's right. Yeah, but was she hot? Oh, yeah, she was. Was she married?

She was divorced. And she just needed male companionship. Did she wind up liking you? Did you guys have an emotional connection or was it just strictly sex? Well, I mean, it was under the guise of a relationship. I'm not really sure at that time how attached I was. But, you know, you got to play the game. I think she, if I remember correctly, she went off the deep end and that's why I had to let her go.

You know, she was suicidal and calling into my work showing up all the time. And I told her, fucking leave me alone. Oh, my God. That's a little scary. I mean, did people think she was your mom? You know what I mean? Weren't they like, who's this crazy old lady coming into your place? I mean, not that 47's that old, but when, you know, she's, when you're sweating a 20-something-year-old,

what was the most expensive thing she bought for you? Oh, God, I can't remember. She would spend, you know, we'd go out and she'd spend hundreds of dollars a night just on food and drink. And you lived with her. This is how you make a living though, right? And you're sort of transient. You stay at people's houses. That's right.

And you know what? I wouldn't call myself a male escorts. That's something I do. You know, from time to time. It's, you know, extra cash. But I do a lot of other things. I'm kind of a jack of all trades. But I consider myself more, I consider myself more an artist.

Can you, like, if I needed cocking done around my house, like. I would be able to do it. Okay. And it's like rake some leaves or some yard work? Absolutely. Right. So you do all that stuff or money too? Absolutely.

So you can do whatever. You can do whatever. Just to make some cash. And you know what? I also enjoy. I also enjoy working. I get bored, you know, doing the same thing every day. Right.

So you like to have this kind of variety in your life. You could never have like a typical nine to five job or choose one career. It's not miserable for me. You know what I mean? I mean, some dates I go on are fucked up. But, you know, that's just, it's interesting. It's interesting. Here's what I want to know, though.

Because, you know, look, I'm a married dude. Right. I've banged a lot of chicks. I don't care. I don't judge people sexually. I don't give a shit. But there's a point you're, you're, are you banging these dudes? Are you just letting them suck you off?

Are you letting them do stuff to you? Are you have to do stuff to them? And is there a price range difference in there? Like what is? Absolutely. Okay. So, so break it down. Okay.

The most, the most I've ever gotten for one date was $1,000. dollars um you got you got you got you got fucked for that i did i did yeah well when you get right down to it yes so he he he he had you fucked you fucked him no i didn't fuck him oh you didn't he just wanted to fuck you but you'll fuck people too you're by right so you're all like you'll do anything i am i'm more into women i do occasionally hook up with dudes just for fun real occasionally you know once a month or so i actually just get the urge to i don't understand like okay so you get the urge so you're what you check fucking watching uh game of thrones Jones, right?

And then, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or whatever. True detective. That's a good fun. And you, and you, so now you're like, okay, it's Sunday night. I'm going to go and I just, what do you just go meet a dude and you go to a gay bar? He puts himself on Craigslist.

He's on Craigslist, right? No, no, no. Yeah, but if I'm going to meet a dude, just, you know, if I meet someone and I think they're cute. Yeah. I've dated guys before, too. Some prolific, you know. Yeah, you say you've dated celebrities.

Could you give us any names? No, I can. can't. But I could say that one was a very, very close friend of mine, more than friends, but he passed away earlier this year and he was... You fucked Robin Williams? No, he was very big. It was earlier this year. And he was very big

in the music industry. He was kind of a legend. Really? Yeah. Who in the music business died early this year? This is anonymous. Okay. And so you were good friends with him and you stayed with him for a long time and you were... I didn't stay with him. I didn't stay with him. I... No, we, well, we met on a different

level, but we ended up, you know, dating. okay but that wasn't was that like an escort situation or that was just a that was how i met him and it continued you know he'd fly me out and around when he'd do shows different places and we'd just hang out can i just ask a question how did he find you we actually met on craigslist so that was a craigslist so let me ask you this though because when a celebrity is going out to you like that no seriously they can't just put it out there that there's celebrity stop i don't know why you're laughing robert because i said i said can ask a question and you literally well it's my show and if i cut you off on your

fucking show you go mental on me. I didn't mean to cut you off. I actually asked it, but I caught your vibe. Yeah. That's why I'm laughing because you can't see you giving me fucking angry eyes. But I can see you like fuck you face. Shut the fuck up. Yeah.

All right. I'm talking too much. I want to know that like, no, I like when you talk about. So you, I want to know when a celebrity is going after you, right? They can't just come out and say there's celebrity. At what point when he's emailing you, does he make up a name and shit and you guys start talking? Because if he's a prominent celebrity that we would know in the music world, like, how does that work?

Well, it was his email was how I recognized him. And I was like, oh, that's a cool email. I really fucking dig that guy's music and so on and so forth. Then I went to met him at a hotel in Midtown. And he was like, yeah, that's me. And I was like, holy fucking shit. Right. So he just put himself out there.

He doesn't like question you. There's no sort of like his people checking you out beforehand because, I mean, how does he know that you're not going to come on this show and out him? Or we can't figure out who it is. Because he was a good friend of mine. Well, you might figure out who it is, but I doubt it. Okay. Robert, what did you want to ask? Like I said, he passed away earlier this year, so there's really much.

I mean, look, dude, I admire you that you're not that guy, to be honest with you. I mean, you could be that guy right now, and I think it's cool that you're not. And I don't want to figure it out. I think it's interesting enough that there's, you bang the fucking dude. You bang some famous guy. Well, we actually never fucked. He'd just like to suck me off. That's fucking crazy.

That shit's crazy. I don't understand where that. He was one of the nicest guys I ever known. You know. He also beats people up and he insults them. Oh, yeah, yeah. People are into all different kinds of things. Some guys just want to be sucked up.

Tell us about the guys that want to be insulted. So about a month ago, I went to some little, you know, motel in the Bronx with some guy. And he paid me $150 to beat him up. And it was a little bit weird for me because I'm not like a really aggressive type of dude, but I can play the part. You know, it's like being an actor. Right. So he wanted me to punch him and like pull on his nose. nipples and like step on him.

And at some point I felt a little uncomfortable and I was like, dude, is this too much? And he's like, no, it's good. He's like, but just don't punch me in the stomach because I just had surgery. And I'm like, what the fuck? Is he hard the whole time? Is he naked when you're doing this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We were both naked and I'm, you know, I'm beating him around.

And then at the end, the weirdest fucking thing, right? He's laying down and he's like, why don't you just kill me? And I was like, no, dude. And he's like, just fucking kill me. And then when I was like, okay, he fucking, he's jerking off and he comes so much. It fucking hit the ceiling of the motel. I kid you not. It was impressive.

Oh, my. And what he said right before that is, why don't you kill me? Right. And this is his fantasy of, you know, getting beat up and someone killing him. And I was like, no, dude, I'm not going to fucking do that. I thought he was dead serious. And then he's like, come on, just do it. I was like, okay, I'm going to kill you.

And boom. Oh, my God. The most amazing ejaculation I've ever fucking seen in my life. I'm not lying. It was impressive. I mean, you know. Did you applaud? I did.

I was like, bro, that's fucking amazing. I don't know how the fuck you did that. He's like, yeah, it was all over the place. For $150. Yeah, no, it wasn't even an hour. It was like 25 minutes. And that was it. And then you leave after he comes.

Did he do anything? I mean, did that turn you on at all? No, not in the slightest. No, I don't get off and beating people up, man. I've been in fights before when I'm drunk and, you know, I've gotten a shit kicked out of me. And I've had a couple, you know, my hands a little fucked up from the other night. But, uh, Jesus Christ. What happened the other night?

Oh, someone stole my fucking, uh, duffel bed. bag again. Are you from New Jersey? No, you know why? It's funny that you say that I actually have been staying there recently, but... No, because you say fucking like every other word, and that's like a new... I used to talk like that, too. No, it's like a New Jersey thing.

I did that on my... Well, there's a lot of places where they do that. No, I'm not... I grew up upstate, I'll say. Mm-hmm. Because I've lived up there. I actually grew up somewhere else, but for now we'll say upstate. Right.

I've lived all over the place, though. I'm very transient, like I mentioned. Right, but like when you were growing up, before you got into all this stuff, and there's still a lot of other things that I have to bring up. Like, what was like, what did you want to do when you got? Like, what did you want to do when you got older? Like, I mean, I'm sure it wasn't like I want to be a transient escort. Well, transient always, always appealed to me for 17 years.

I didn't leave, you know, a 20 mile vicinity of where I lived. So I always wanted to travel. Right. And I left when I was 17 and I traveled the fuck out of the United States. States. So I've been in the city now for this the outer boroughs for six years now. But how old were you when you first screwed or started to figure out that you were into dudes? Um, you know what? I well, I experimented around I think I was 14, 15 with an older guy. He was like 23. No, he was like 21, I think. Right. But I wasn't really that into it. I was just, you know,

just trying things. And I was like, you know, this isn't for me. For some reason, it stuck. but you're into it now though you're into guys now right occasionally you know and I find it interesting it doesn't really bother me but like I said 29 out of 30 days of the month I'm not really attracted to these guys

it's not strictly a money thing but I mean if you're gonna ask honestly money plays a part in everything right I guess I don't know I mean not for me no one's gonna work for free but I don't think of it as work it's it's almost just you know it's something to do

I guess I'm bored. That's why I do anything. That's why I drink. That's why I fuck around with dudes. That's why I, you know, take photos and play guitar. That's why I do you do anything? Because I'm bored. Are you happy? I'm just asking if you're happy. A lot of the time, yeah. Yeah. No, but I mean, there's got to be something behind this. Like, I mean, would you grow, do you have, like, were you adopted or you have, like, what's the deal with your parents and how to, what was your childhood like? Well, my father was kind of a deadbeat. You know, he's, he's, um, we've been a little bit closer in the past, but it's still not, still not ideal. Mm-hmm. Um, he's still a piece of work, but, you know, he's my father. You only get one, so. And what about your mom?

Oh, she's an angel. I love her to death, man, and I'm. Do they know? Oh, well, I used to tell my mother everything, and she's, you know, she said, stop telling me shit. I don't want to know. You would tell her that you, like, fuck guys for money? I don't know. know if I even went that far. I was I was shooting heroin for a couple years and I was I told her all

about that and she was like stop telling me I don't want to fucking worry about you just you know just call and say hi but that's a big sign right there because I got to say I dated two guys one was like a junkie with the needles and one was a snorter of heroin did you do needles or did you snort it I did the needles and you know I've been I've been off of it for a long time now but but no what I was going to say is that nobody no I mean I guess that's better but no but nobody does heroin unless there's some serious shit they're trying to numb out like seriously i was a drinker robert kelly was a drinker we're both addicts and we're both like in recovery and it's just like of course we did that shit because we're trying to stuff some trauma down right and sort of numb ourselves

people that do heroin have it's like it's hardcore because that's like you know the end-all be all of numbing so what is it in your past do you even have a like do you even remember I mean, I remember, yes, I have an incredible memory. I remember everything, but I can't pinpoint any one thing. I mean, were you molested or anything like that? No, I wasn't. Actually, you know, it's funny. I was an altar boy in a Catholic archdiocese that was known for this happening,

and it never happened to me. Maybe you just don't remember. No, I swear to God, I would remember. No, I remember everything, but I don't remember stuff like that. Like, I don't, it's not, if it's, it's not necessarily something that you remember. I'm really serious. I mean, you wouldn't just do heroin for no reason. I didn't do it for no reason.

What did you do it for? Because of. Well, there wasn't any reason it was, you know, at the time, I felt like doing it. Like I said, because you're bored, right? Yeah. I think the first, I think the first time I did heroin was when I lived in Connecticut. Mm-hmm. And I snorted it.

Mm-hmm. And I, you know, dabbled with it on and off, but I never really got into it until, years later but the reason I started injecting drugs was that's a totally other story which is a fucking nightmare but you know I don't even want to I don't even want to go down that road let's let's talk about you're clean now you're clean now oh yeah you know for the most part I drink I actually I quit smoking pot for two years and about two months ago I started again but I smoked like once a week and it's kind of cute because I'm a lightweight you know I feel like, you know, every time I fucking smoke, I get, I take one poke and I'm blasted, you know.

It's like, you know, something like I can't do it when I'm out and about. Right. I got to, you know, go to a movie or right before I go to sleep type of thing. Whereas I used to do it every day, you know. Ask Rob, I look like a fucking dirty hippie, right? Yeah. I used to do, you know, yeah, I used to do rat dog. He's got long hair?

It's not long, but it's show the length. It's been long. I look different every time you see me, you know. Yeah, but you also see you have multiple. Right, right, right. Right, does that go with the multiple personalities? Well, I'm a Gemini. I guess, you know, that's not an excuse, but yeah, I might, you know, wake up every day and be a different person.

Do you mean hardcore, like, multiple personalities or you just mean you're, like, in a different mood? Like, you know, because that's a serious thing to say of multiple personalities. Are you schizzo or just you're just a different? I wouldn't say that. You know, no, I've been assessed by numerous doctors and they can't find that I'm psychotic. They say, you know, you're perfectly fine. You're just, you know, a little, you're just a little weird. You think you're psychotic?

No, no, no. We all have our moments, right? No, I just don't understand why you're there. Like you're saying, you know, they haven't diagnosed you as that. Like, what are you there to begin with? Like, why are you even in that place getting diagnosed? Why have I ended up in a hospital? Oh, well, I was in one.

I was actually, sorry, I came away from the mic for a second there. I was in one the other day because I beat the shit out of this guy and they found me on a park bench and they threw me and they threw me in the hospital. So, you know, because I was drunk. Mm-hmm. So they assessed you when you're in those kinds of situations. So you wind up beating people up.

You wind up in the hospital and then they tell you you're not psychotic. Well, there was a reason behind it. I mean, it wasn't just, you know, I just found someone and it was like, hey, I'm going to fucking, you know, people, people. People push their luck a lot in the city, man, you know? Mm-hmm. Yeah. I just still, like, on my show, the reason why I like to have people on is like I like to sort of, I mean, I love, like, like the sex stuff and all these things because I think like Robert said like you could see you on the street and you never think you're an escort and that's just real life shit you know that's like what you're trying to do is get down a little deep to put some depth into it totally or to find out the reasons for it because like I have to say that when you find like to me there's always a story behind everything and people are so judgmental to people that either fuck for a living or do like heroin you know people just look at it on the surface you know but when you find out the reasons behind it you know everybody there are reasons.

and like that's the kind of stuff that I like because that's like the real shit too and it's interesting but if you don't want to go there that's fine but I find that like there's like inconsistency Robert don't you agree like you're an addict I'm an addict right like this guy is not it's not so simple like he's trying to make it out to seem right I mean I can be honest but I don't know how honest you want me to be

No be honest go for it no no and again yeah there's Obviously there's a lot of fucking problems You show up with two tall boys and a pint of bourbon and you're like, I need to take this because I'm shaking. You know, you got a fucking problem. I'm recovering alcoholic for 30 years.

Yeah. I've never got the shakes in my life. Yeah. I would say like, you know, with the last week I've been getting them. I mean, dude, you know, I can't eat until 6 p.m. And, you know, if I drink before that,

I'm just going to puke it up. It's kind of fucked. Yeah. But I've replaced, you know, I've replaced every other drug I used to do with this. Right. So you're... And it's starting to, you know.

It's starting to, you know. It's starting to, of fail, this is starting to get to you too. Yeah. So there's a point where, like we all know, as addicts, I'm a recovery. I mean, I went to AA and, you know, I still believe

in the process of that, even though I don't go as much as I used to go, but you know, I can see you and go, fuck, you know, this guy is, you're trying to bury something, dude, you're trying to kill something. Right, right, right. So, yeah, for sure. You can do all this stuff. You can,

you can, you know, you talk about sex, and you talk about, you know, dudes and the things that you do for money. And, you know, if you're okay with that, that's cool. But, you know, are you okay with it? At the end of the day, I think I'm 29 now. I used to say if I'm 30, I used to honestly believe I wouldn't live past 27. Right. You know, that's the rock star age.

And I used to be invincible and I used to be a rock star. And I no longer am. And it's kind of fucking giving me a trip in the head. Yeah. And I guess I used to say when I'm 30, it's not going to be cute to be doing this anymore. Right. Now I say when I'm 35, there's just no fucking way. I have to figure something else out. Right.

Yeah, but that's a hard thing. I need some stability. And you know what? And like I said, like this is why I do this. This is why I do anything. I guess in life is because I'm bored. If I just wanted to fucking sit around and do nothing, I could do that. Yeah, but no.

You're not doing this stuff because you're bored. People fucking do that. No, you're not doing this stuff because you're bored. Well, that's, I guess that's a, that's a negative connotation. But what it is is, you know, it's motivation. It's something. It's something interesting. You're doing this stuff because it gives you.

Because I'm curious. Because I'm curious about it. I want to fucking know. Really? You know? Yeah. If there's a guy who's willing to fucking pay to suck my dick, I want to fucking see what he's all about.

I want to meet him. This orthodox Jewish guy who I gave a massage to the other night, at first I was really uncomfortable, you know? And he's like, yeah, if you're going to leave five minutes earlier, you know. I'm like, oh, this is the typical fucking stereotypical thing, you know? He's like, I'm not going to pay you. And I'm like, all right, all right. whatever, and then we get down to fucking talking, and he's like the coolest fucking guy ever.

But how did he find you on Craigslist? Yeah, exactly, exactly. So you put out ads like a male escort looking, you know, offering services? I typically don't put out ads anymore because I just respond to other people's. Oh, okay. That's how you found me. Yeah, I figure if, right, exactly. I figure if someone else is looking for something, then I can cater to them, yeah.

Right. So there was a guy looking for, what was he looking for the Hasidic Jew guy? He said he just wanted, you know, both of us to get naked and he wanted a massage and, you know, a full body massage with, you know, whatever. How much was that going to cost him? He paid me $100 for an hour. Okay. I only stayed, I only stayed 45 minutes and he gave me $80. I said, that's fine, dude, whatever.

I would have stayed longer, but the train ride was fucking, you know, I took the B train all the way. He actually didn't give you the full hundred because you left early? Yeah, and I didn't leave early because I didn't like him. I was just like, dude, I got to fucking go. I'm exhausted. worked all day too, you know. I actually, I actually have a fucking job. Really? What's the real job that you have? Like I said, I'm an artist, so, you know, I do stuff like that. Okay. What, like, what kind of stuff? Like, what's the job, actually?

Well, you know, I'm a little bit of a behind the scenes guy. Um, but I work for, um, I work for another artist. So, you know, I guess you could say a PA assistant. Uh-huh. That's cool. Go for, like a run around person. Right, right. That's a step in the right direction. if that's what you want to do. I've been doing it for years. Mm-hmm. That's great. Like I said, I'm,

I'm starting to get back into doing my own art, too, so. That's great. But, no, I'm happy about it. Why did you call him the spiny guy? Like,

what was the thing with his spiny? His feet were fucked. They were like, they were, they were really weird. I've never seen feet quite like this. Mm-hmm. I mean,

they were disgusting feet? I mean, my feet are a little fucked up too now, but, um, I cannot say that, that this is a way that a foot should look

there was like yeah there was like spines coming off of them that's disgusting like and you had to talk did you have to touch perpendicular oh yeah no I had to rub his feet

but then when we started talking like I you know I just zoned out I didn't I wasn't thinking about that that's like a manual thing I you know I don't obviously he was turned on by it but I you know Is there just a massage

or there any jerking off or like any of that? Not in that one. No, I expected that. I thought he was going to want to touch me. He didn't want to touch him. Was he hard? He was, yeah. So he's hard. So maybe he just jerked himself off when you left. I mean, is that how it works for guys? Is that what you guys would do? Probably. No, I don't. Yeah, if I had a girl over and, you know, she got me there and then she left, I would fucking jerk off, right? Yeah, I'd be bummed out. I mean, I've done a lot of hookers and I've done massages and, you know, I've done, I've done a practical hookers. I had one on, on, on 9th Avenue.

knew the other day man she i've seen her out there before but her thing is you know she gets guys this is what another guy around there told me she gets guys to bring them back to their place and then she calls 911 and cries rape and she's put a lot of guys in fucking rikers so i dodged a bullet on that one because she came on to me you know i was i was about to bring her back and uh do the damn thing you know and then we go into this other bar because someone stepped out and you know said word and and she fell asleep I had to fucking call an ambulance where do you meet her I mean they're not walking around the streets at this point there are streetwalkers there are streetwalkers well now there's kitchen area well yeah well that's you know that's where I'm at they're like yeah

they're over um Robert used to live over there they've moved they've moved further you know they're over on 10th you know there's no cops on 10th the cops are on 7th 8th 9th yeah so they're even over on 11th now yeah but you don't see them they're fucking working all the time right no I know They're busy. I have some lifeguards of my building that run the pool and they were telling me that they go and they get, they get screw, they screw these women for like 40 or 60 bucks over on 9th Avenue area. Really? So cheap. Wow. Yeah, it's ridiculous.

How much was that one going to charge you? Oh, no, no, no. She wasn't really a hooker. No, she just wanted to, well, she just played it out like she wanted to fuck and then she. Okay, I'm confused. I thought she was a hooker. But you say you have relationships with women, right? You have, though, relationships with women and...

I do. I have a couple, yeah, I have a couple. And you like to cheat on them? Like, you said something if that was interesting to me about the cheat. No, it's not that I don't like to cheat on them. I've been in monogamous relationships before where I've had permission to do stuff with other girls. I used to date some dancers from some gentlemen's clubs in Manhattan.

And all of them would like to do things with other girls, you know, the girls they work with and, you know, it's part of that scene. Right. But where I would have their permission to do things with other girls in their presence, I would still want to deviate and do it, you know, behind their back, which is, I guess, fucked up, you know. I guess that says I'm just a fucked up person. No, but I think that's the whole cheating rush.

Right, I think you have something about the, yeah, you know, I would, you know, I could have these dancers with my girlfriend and we could all have a good time, but I could, you know, be on the level. And it wasn't as exciting. It wasn't as much of a turn on as banging some fat broad that I met, you know, and I drive 30 miles just to, you know. To fuck her. Go look at this thing that's, you know.

Right, but look at this thing that's hiding me from you. You see what this says? It says cheat. Yeah, I see it. Robert Kelly authored this book. So he's the cheating cheater extraordinaire. Like you get that thing that he's talking about, right, Robert? Yeah, I mean, it's, it's, it's,

But there's different thing. There's some guys who are cheat and they just have no problem with them. They love doing it. And it's just their thing and they don't. It's just about variety of sex. But then there's some guys that cheat in it because they're trying to, it's like fucking drinking. It's like, you know, you're cheating and you're chasing excitement. I think that's what it is.

I think that's what it is. It's more down that road for me. It's a buzz. I think so. You're chasing the buzz of the hunt. I've had a couple good relationships that I've fucked up. that I've let fly away from me that I really should have held on to. Yeah, the fact that you...

And it wasn't, you know, well, it wasn't always cheating, but that always had something to do with it. The danger, excite you. All that fucking danger. When I used to get hookers, it wasn't about the hooker. I didn't want to fuck her. I didn't want to come. I just wanted to hunt her down.

I wanted to find her. I wanted to get the right one. Hopefully the picture was right. Show up. Hopefully she's nice. Give her the money. Hopefully she doesn't rip me on. It's this crazy excitement all the way to the point where I,

come and then as soon as I come I'm like it's this quiet weird like after the war like all right I'll see I put my socks on and it's like all right it was nice me and it's this I don't want to talk to you anymore I want to get the fuck out of here right right yeah I got what I came for see later is every now and then it's like the sex though is really fucking amazing so then just like chasing the dragon to try and get that same never never once in a while that's what I mean once in a while I mean very and I've been doing I've been doing the street I've been doing the, you know, the whores recently, only recently I've ever paid. And I don't pay much.

I always negotiate because, you know, I work in the fucking industry. Right. Right. I got, I got a few tricks up my sleeve. But, yeah, recently I've gotten into the paying for it. And I don't mind it so much. And actually, you know, I've had a couple that, you know, they want to come back. They say, you're good.

You're good at what you do. I actually enjoy having, you know, coming over and hanging out with you. Do they give it to you for free after that? Or you still have to pay? No, you still got to give them something, you know. Give them some herb or, you know, buy beers and cigarettes all night. Right, like the same shit that you look for.

Right, right, right, right. Or they want a bag of coke or something. Right, I don't do cocaine. It's been years since I've fucking done it. I hate the shit. But girls love it. And a lot of guys, too. But it ain't my thing.

Never has been. What about porn? You said you did porn too? Oh, yeah, okay. So, yeah, when I was younger and when I was living in Fairfield County, I'd have these guys that would, you know, they'd pay me, you know, money for me to come see them on the regular, but also they would say if you want to bring a girl with you and I can watch you and maybe like take photos and do videos, I'll pay her. And I'm like, well, yeah, she's going to cost more obviously. You know, like I'm 400 an hour. She's 600 an hour. And I'd find some fucking.

and broad and be like, yeah, I'll give you $100. Because I was fucking her anyways. I'd be like, you want to come like, fuck me and we'll do a little video. No one's going to see it right, right, right, right, right off the top, you know. How old are you? That's in my pocket. I was a little hustler, man. I was doing that when I was 19, 20, 21.

I've been, it's been more than seven years. I've been doing this for at least 10 years. But, yeah, I did that for a number of years. I don't have any girls like that anymore, you know? What, that would go with you and take the videos with the other night? Hell no, hell no. No, I can't find them, you know.

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Avocado Mattress.com. I'd have to pay them the full amount, and that just, you know, I'd still do it, but. Would these guys post those videos anymore, or they just did it for their own enjoyment? No, just purely for their private, enjoyment as far as I know unless they're posted you know and you found these people too on Craigslist right or like what other websites are you're on adult websites

where you find this kind of action that's honestly that's actually the only one I've ever used I used another one one time I met I met a tranny in the Bronx and I ended up just hanging out and he she whatever you know

she I guess right to be respectful was smoking crystal and posted me an ad with her credit card on back page, which I never got any calls from until finally, like, you know, a month later, I was in Connecticut and I got a call. I was staying at a hotel. And this guy calls me and he's like, do you do threesomes? He's like, me and my girl want to, my girl wants to get like tag teamed. And I was like, sure. So they drove up. They came to the hotel and, you know, we, you know, just ran it, ran it down on her. Right. And I was like, that's really cool. Yeah. I'm going to take a picture

you for her so she can see what you look like. Wait. You go out there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, absolutely. Do you do, do you use condoms with all these people? Well, yeah, yeah.

If I'm going to fuck somebody or get fucked, yes. And I don't really like getting fucked. I really don't like it. You invite the guys, right? Like you don't love, but you'll do it for the cash. I can count it.

Well, I have before. I'll put it that way. I can count it on, you know, on one hand, the number of times I have and I just don't like it. This is not for me. It's not for me.

Mm-hmm. But fucking the guy in the ass is kind of like no different than if it's a guy or girl. I mean, I've heard that from other guys. That's not my favorite thing either, you know, when guys ask me they want to do that. Guys want to, you know, the standard thing is if a guy wants to come suck me off, he's going to give me $100, you know? Like some guys want to get off for like $60 and I'm like, no, dude, come on. It's fucking. It's the city, bro.

Like, you know, what can you get for $60? You know? Right, exactly. Not some dick. Anyways. Some guys want you to fuck. them and then they want to fuck you and then they only want to pay you a hundred bucks so it's like dude no no fucking way you know right but there's but there's but there's but there's younger kids out

there who look better than me who are doing the same thing for cheaper because they because they legitimately enjoy it and i'm you know i'm more of a companion i'm more of an intellectual guy i i mean i would i would say so i don't know if you guys agree but i'm more of someone you can sit down and talk to i'm more of a fucking therapist you know you're a dude this is why this is why people tip bartenders. You're a dude. These other guys are probably young little twinks that are actually full gay and love dudes. You're just a dude who's bisexual.

You're a regular Joe. And you know, you know. Yeah, I'm not for everybody. You know, nine out of ten people are like, no, not my style. I would never in a million fucking years believe any of this shit. If someone come up to me and said, this dude, I'd be like, you're out of your fucking true. No, no, you never would.

Tell me the picture. No, I did. It's just sending now. Okay. I would never, ever, ever. I would fucking, yeah, I'd be like, what's up, dude? Do you want to play video games? Right, right, right, right, yeah.

Yeah, but. I did, I did two years in fucking prison, you know, never, never let this, well, I'm not going to say, but never, never, you know, this, this side of me was just shut off. If I have, the biggest fear I have in the world is, you know, someone hearing this fucking radio show. Mm-hmm. If I get locked up again, you know what I mean? Why?

That's a scary fucking thing, man. About getting locked up? No, no, no, no, no, that's fine. fine. Then what? Oh, it's not ideal, but,

you know, being gay in prison. Yeah, that's not, knowing that you fuck around with dudes. Yeah. Okay,

but wait, you said you dated guys before. So if you're dating a guy, you got to take it in the ass and you got to, like, dating and there's sex involved in dating a man, isn't there? No.

No. I had a gay roommate that explained this whole thing to me. What? And it baffled me too. Most, a lot of gay guys don't like it. They like cuddling and sucking or kissing. A lot of gay guys don't like it and fucking.

and fucked in the ass. Really? Yeah. I mean, not every gay guy likes it in the ass. Like I said, I had a recent, I had a recent relationship.

This guy wouldn't even let me, even if I was like, I'm going to, I'm going to, you know, bless you. He'd be like, no, I don't want you to touch me. He didn't want me to touch him.

So what was the, that's called a friend. No, no, because he liked sucking me off. Oh, okay. He loved that. Okay.

I mean, I just don't know what the difference is if you say you have relationships and you're bisexual. if there's no sex involved. I mean, you know what I mean, Robert? You don't think? Well, sex is, I mean, I dated one of the hottest chicks I ever dated

and one of the sexiest relationships I ever had was with a girl I never had sex with. What did you guys do, dry hump? We did scenarios. We made out. She sucked my dick and she blew my friends in front of me and one of my friends, I should say. Why did you guys never have sex, though? Just never did. I don't know.

And it was, it made it. That's a weird thing. It made it even hotter. Really? Yeah. She had a kid. I don't know. She wouldn't let me fight.

But, I mean, we would play with it, like get to the point. And I would remember putting it in just a little. And she'd stop me. And then she just talked to her. I mean, it was crazy. But it was awesome. It wasn't. I would think that would frustrate me or make me go.

But it was fucking amazing. Right. But that's because you were probably fucking 10 other women at the same time. Nope. No way. You were monogamous with her? No, I wasn't monogamous. But there wasn't 10 women.

No, but I'm just saying that you wouldn't call that a relationship. She was like someone you were sleeping with it. You didn't have sex. I'm saying when you have a relationship with your wife when you were dating her, someone you're really dating. Yeah. Sex is a part of it or else it's not a relationship. So I'm just saying to him that he calls himself bye and I don't think me,

I don't think you're by. You might not be by. A wife and a chick you're dating or banging. Nobody said relationships. Let me put it this way. Let me put it this way. Well, no, yes, because I have dated, I have dated guys. And I can put a number on that too.

But here's the thing, right? People ask me, am I straight? Am I by? Am I gay? Am I this? Am I that? No. I'm not any of that.

I'm just me. Right. What's my name again? Dirty, Dirty Raymond. I keep saying Dirty Sanchez. Dirty Ramon. Right, right. There you go.

There you go. So that's me. That's it. That's all I am. I'm not any of those. You're all, but you are, you're a lot of things, dirty remote. I do. I do whatever I want, whenever I want.

That's it. You know? Unless I, you know, if I want to, you know, pay the consequences, sometimes that crosses the line. Other than that, yeah, yeah, I do whatever I want what I want. What have been your consequences? Besides jail, because you won't tell us why you went to jail, right?

Well, I mean, it was drug-related, but it was a little fucked up. Were you selling? Yeah, yeah, I've done that before. Okay, is that what you got busted for? I mean, you know, nobody knows who you are. It's, I don't know why you'll tell us that you'll, like, suck a guy off, but you won't tell us you went to jail, right? Robert, like, I mean, you know.

Well, jail is a different thing. I mean, I went to juvie jail, and I remember, you know, prisoners. They were very particular. No one did it. They don't admit to it. It's a weird thing. Jail life is a weird thing. And when you went to real jail, a lot of people are like, fuck you.

That's a different universe. How long were you in jail for? It's gnarly. Just under two years. I mean, I've been. That's a long time. Well, it was prison. I've been in county a couple other times.

well, pardon me. Yeah, all over, you know, all over the country. For two years for drugs? I honestly, I just have to say, I don't know what you were in for, but I think sometimes these rules. I got fucking lucky. I got really fucking lucky. No, because sometimes I think people are in jail for things that they shouldn't be. It's because I'm white.

Right. So you should have been for 50 years? Yeah, it probably would have been, I mean, an A2 felony is, yeah, that's a lot of time. What does that mean? An A2? Well, it's not good. We'll put it that way. But it was for selling drugs, right?

More or less, yeah. Okay, Robert, I don't know if you agree with me on this, but, like, for me, I just can't believe that you could rape someone and not go to jail. If an undercover detective buys drugs from you and then busts you and catches you red-handed, then that's for selling drugs, right? Right. Right. Okay.

So, yeah. So that's what happened. You just told us what happened. Allegedly that's what happened. I pleaded guilty to it. And there you go. I just don't think that that warrants more than two years in jail. It's ridiculous.

You're not like, I don't know if you agree with me on this, Robert, but like I don't think that like, you know, the drugs and the jail thing. I mean, you know, I just, I have a, it's like a whole other podcast we could do, but I just think that's like, what do you think you deserve 10 years for that? I'm down. You know what? I don't think you deserve more than two. I don't know why you said you got off lucky. They put people longer in jail for that. Oh, you're fucking kidding me?

Yeah. Drugs is fucking huge. ever since Reagan. I know, but it's kind of fucked up. Rockefeller was the big one. It's crazy. You go away for life. Yeah, it's terrible, I think.

If you get A1 or 848, you're fucked. But anyways, I don't know. I don't really dabble in that anymore. That's great. You know, I smoke a little bit of pot and I, um... How do you get off the heroin? Did you do a program? I did actually.

And you know what? That wasn't what got me off the heroin. Um, I did a week in Valhalla and then I did, um, you know, a 30 day, program but that wasn't what got me off they let me out early they were like you know you're just good and it was it was a mental change i was with a girl i've been dating for three years a dancer from uh used to be called tens i think on 21st street and then it was a cabaret and then it closed down some fucking nonsense anyways um lovely girl man sweetheart love her to death um she ever listens to this you know i still miss you and i wish i hadn't fucked it up but um

Yeah, we were together for like the majority, yeah, a little over three years. And that was really why I did it. That was really why I did it. She wanted you to, she helped you get clean. No, it came down to the point where, you know, I detoxed in, you know, on a concrete floor in a fucking cell in Valhalla. And I told myself, all right, you know, even though I've got this, you know, compulsion over the last few years, this obsession with, you know, injecting fucking poison into my body. For some reason, you know, this girl is, you know, her energy is beautiful enough that makes me want to fucking stop doing it.

And that's why I stopped doing it. And then, you know, we broke up a few months later and I just haven't had the urge to do it since then. That's great. You know, I even when shit gets fucked up, I'm like, that's, I don't want to go down. that road a week ago this girl in vermont another another dancer i was dating i shouldn't have said vermont fuck um i'll edit that out wanted me to come up wanted me to no it's fine it's fine it's fine um wanted me to come up there and she wanted me to she was like go to newark get a brick of dope and and and bring it up here and i'll pay you for it you know i'll pay you extra take the bus

i'll pay for your bus come up here you know my boyfriend's doing this and that and and i told her no i said no i went to connecticut instead i hung out with my friends who are you know seven years sober used to be the biggest dope heads in the world they're fucking you know they don't do shit now they just you know smoke their wax and their e-cigarettes and I had a blast man what do you think about weed Robert Kelly as far as but like when you smoke weed I don't think it's that big of a deal I think it's better than alcohol I mean it is not absolutely I think alcohol to me is a fucking violent drug it's terrible it's terrible people people always wind up up getting I'm Irish and German so I you know I'm built for it I guess

But I mean, as a sober person, Robert, would you smoke pot? No, of course not, because I'm sober. But you think just smoking weed every, like, once a year would be... Absolutely. Really? Yeah, if you're a recovering addict, absolutely. Right. There's no way around it.

I mean, I think out of all the drugs, weed is... It's very peaceful. I'm always like, oh, this is a peaceful pothead. It's fine. I have no problem with weed. But alcohol is, I think, the worst drug out there. I mean... It's definitely one of the worst.

It's terrible. But that's your thing right now, dirty Ramon, right? That's one of, that's, that's my fucking thing, you know, alcohol and Marlboro Reds. Yeah. I know that you said that you wanted to be drinking when we did the podcast because you talk more and you're more honest, right? Right. And now, you know, now I feel, now I feel fucking great. I've been, you know, I didn't really get much sleep last night.

I was, you know, tying up things in the studio. My boss came back from out of town and I just pulled it together. You know, I had the place looking fucking spotless by the time he got back. So, you know. Are you well hung? I am. And you know what? Actually, like, average in length.

And this is why I guess a lot of guys originally will get with me, because even if they don't like my face photo or if, you know, I mean, I'm a photographer. So I get good ones anyways. But even if they're like, okay, that seems like an interesting sort of dude, right? Not like the hottest guy, but I, you know, I wonder. When they see my dick, they're like, oh, wow, okay. All right. Good. Right.

Because I see, you know, Robert's at me your picture and I see your finger. and I feel like, oh, he's got a big, he's got a big wean. You know what? It's like, it's average length. It's average length. I'm not going to lie. It's like seven and a half, eight inches, but it's really fucking thick. It's like, average in what?

Just so you know, right, exactly. Just so you know, seven inches is actually not average, but nobody care. People care more about width. It's below average, right? No, four and a half is average. Four and a half is average. It's, it's, yes. To five is average.

Most guys are small. So that actually is very long. With thickness, I think is more important. I think most girls, I think most girls will agree with you. And I think, you know, I mean, if it's a fucking, if it's a soda can, then they don't want it. But, you know, if it's, I think mine is, you know, it's circumcised. I think it's just right.

That's what, that's what people tell me. So. Right. I'm going to go with that. Right. So that's helped you in your career. Or, no, it's not your career, but it's helped you in those endeavors. Maybe that's why you, you know, you chose that.

Yeah. And, you know, I've been, I've been doing decent, actually, landing chicks at these dive bars I go to in the last six months, which for the last six years, I've never fucking bagged. Anyway, when I go to Brooklyn, you know, and I get hipsters and stuff like that or, you know. Yeah, you kind of look like a hipster. I know his vibe, Robert. He looks like a musician to me. Yeah, I played guitar since I was very young. And you said before, like you were a rock star, you lived that dream and then it all went, like, were you in a band that got like some sort of any kind of small notoriety or something that you, like, were sort of devastated over? Because you brought that up. Something like that.

What, what happened? Well, we, um, I, I, um, I, I was very young and, you know, I was in a band where I grew up and we did like a battle the band's type thing. But the guys were all fucking dickheads, you know. Okay. So that was your claim to fame? Well, no, that wasn't my claim to fame. I don't have a claim to fame. Right.

I'm not famous. No, but you said it was like that was like, no, no, no, you said something like, oh, that was like really devastating. Like you had that and then you lost it. It kind of, it kind of hurt a little bit when, you know, all these guys were like, you know, well, we've got a band. and we've got fucking, you know, it was a bunch of Jewish kids in Massachusetts, and they're like, yeah, we got fucking money and this and that, and you don't, you don't.

So basically, like, we're going this direction, and I was like, fuck that. It turned me off to the whole music industry. I still play guitar. I still love to fucking rock out, you know, and I still love music more than anything else, but I will never, I don't think professionally, you know, If it happens organically, it happens.

I don't think I'll set out with guys and say, let's go out and play music and fucking make money because it's just, it's just, yeah, but this is what I have to say to you, Dirty, Dirty Ramon. I know,

listen to Dirty Ramon. We're all three people here that use drugs and alcohol to like, numb our shit. And what I believe, and I think you'll agree, Robert, is that most addicts are just super sensitive people. That's why,

you know, your feelings are really fucking intense. And so you need, like, stuff, you know, people are different, You know, highly sensitive people, you know, I know I'm sensitive to so much that that's why I drank a lot because I needed to numb myself down a little bit.

And I think you seem like that, like you definitely have that as well, that, you know, you get this one problem that happens with your band and it's devastating. Yeah, what happened, whatever. And then you're never going to, you know, that's like a little much. I won't say never. You know, I play with people. And, you know, it doesn't click. So, you know, if it happens, it happens. Maybe it will.

Right. But maybe that's why you do the transit and stuff. you get really sort of hurt feelings when things don't work out for you. Yeah, I get a little butt hurt when things don't work out for me. I'm not going to lie. Right. So you keep moving and shit. Right.

Wouldn't you, right? Yeah. Wouldn't you? No, that's what, yeah. Yeah. If you had like everything invested in something and it fucked up and it

absolutely. It was, you know, not your fault, but directly related to your circumstance and there was nothing you could do about it. Yeah. You'd say what the fuck.

This kind of sucks, right? Yeah. Right. At the end of the day. But that's just life. Not for nothing. And you sort of have to realize like you survive it and then you can survive it again and then you're okay.

But when you shut down and you're like one thing and then that's why you keep running to different things because you never want to sort of be in that position again. That's where the whole transient thing comes in. You say it's out of boredom. I think it's out of fear of being hurt or being, you know, sort of devastated by putting yourself into something and it having, you know, go awry. But that's like fucking life. You may be right. And you know what? I guess that's probably my biggest fear.

People ask me my biggest fear and, you know, shit's always awry with me. So maybe I'm always afraid. You're right. That fear, it's like a self-fulfilling prophecy. It's what you're always sort of afraid of, but you live in that mood. I consider it anxiety, but. Right. Pardon me.

Yeah, no, I consider it anxiety, but, you know, it is what it is. Right. Yeah, that's your thing. That's now I finally figured it out. That's why you're running like you do from one thing to another, you know, And all I know is I can't keep doing it forever. And this is what I'm going to suggest to you though. This is what I'm going to suggest to you because I do this podcast.

I really like to actually help people with their problems. And I think like, you know, the thing that I learned from being sober for 10 years is like I learned how to deal with that kind of shit, you know, and just be okay with it. And when you start to just put yourself in the position to face your fear and if you take away all the alcohol and all that shit, you know, and you let stuff go awry and you just deal with it, you just start to learn. that you're okay and you're equipped and you'll get over it and you'll be fine and then you could start having real things in your life you're chasing the dragon because you're empty inside because you don't have anything really real everything is just like sort of there one minute and gone the next and when you're not fulfilled inside especially when you get older when you start to get older you need more real shit you know in your 20s you could get a number from a hot girl and it

could fulfill you for a month when you start to get 30s and 40s like you need stuff you're going to need real stuff. Like this bullshit life you're living isn't going to do it for you and you're either going to start drinking more or you need to clean yourself up and like start to try to like, you know, park your ass in one place for longer, figure out what you want. Get back into your music, dude. I think you're ridiculous. You need to get back to that. That's what you really like, you know, or start doing your art and stop being someone's minion and, you know, take some chances yourself. But I think you have to clean up your act first to have the balls to do that and face your fear and because you'll be fine. Everyone deals with stuff like that.

And I'm sure, and you'll be okay. Addox are the most fiercest people I know, really. Seriously. No, and that's true. And everyone who tells me I quit drinking, right? And I used to drink and I quit drinking. I say, I give you respect because you must have been a fucking animal. Or you wouldn't have had the, you know, common sense.

Anyone who says, I've never drank before and I never will, I say, what the fuck is wrong with you? You know, at least give it a try. Right. But if you take it to the edge and then you go back. But if you clean yourself up and you start to just like sort of live with all your nonsense and your anxiety and your quote unquote boredom and try and figure out what it is and go a little deeper, I think you'll be happier and you won't have to do all this kind of crazy stuff. Well, it's not that crazy, is it?

Yes, it is. It really is that crazy. Robert, give him a little bit of a, because we have to go because Robert is we're up 55 minutes. Yes, I think it's crazy. I think you, I don't think you, look, man. You're not crazy. The stuff he's doing is crazy. That's what I'm saying.

You're like a person that's fucked up. Like, that's what human beings are. That's why I do this podcast because. real people have real problems. You know what I mean? That's just the way that it goes. I'm not saying you're crazy. I'm sure if we had two more hours.

No, I am. No, I am. You don't know me. I am crazy. I'm definitely crazy. Okay, but that was put on you. Like there has to be shit that this all came about. You know, when you don't want to go there and that's fine and we don't even have time at this point, but you could call back another time. But I think you should, I think you should have him back on again.

She's definitely have him back on whether he comes back in a studio or. Over the phone. over the phone. I think you should definitely check in with... I would definitely, yeah, definitely callback. I think you should check in, definitely check in every once in a while. I had a good time. I like to, you know, I like to talk about shit. Well, you get a very interesting story, man. You're a very

interesting person. And you know what you remind me? You remind me of Mickey Rourke. Mickey Rourke. I mean, seriously, if I shaved you down and did your hair... Which is funny, because he played Shinnaski in Barfly, right? Yep. Oh, and that's what you wanted to be called. Chinaski.

That was what I was going to go by, of course. because Bikowski is my hero. Bikovsky is my hero. There you go. That says a lot. That says a lot right there. So there you go. So that's it.

So we'll have you back on. All right. Good deal. No, I had a great time. I had a great time. Thank you. You keep me updated.

Yeah, yeah. If I wake up in the morning and I got 40 bucks in my pocket, I'm fucking good. That's, that's what I say. I'd like to see you shoot for more. I mean, if you raise your standards to have more than $40 in your day and that's a good day. Like maybe. Yeah, I'm doing like a different thing right now.

And I've, I've, in the last six years since I've been to New York, I've probably, I've probably burned through at least $6 million that I've made illegally. Right.

And that money means fucking nothing to me. It's paper. Would I have rather stuck it somewhere and done something with it? Yes. Looking back, yes. Is that how I operate? no. That's not how you operate now.

But please know that you could always change. And how do I change that? I don't know because it's not something, well, yeah, it's not something ingrained to me. It's something I'm dealing with. I'm getting better. I'm getting better with, you know, sorting out my finances and trying to.

And the other thing is I don't pay rent. I stay in a few different places and I, I'm resourceful. I'm resourceful. I think the thing you, the one thing that you need, I don't sleep outdoors. You need help. And I'm not saying what kind of help you need But I'm saying when somebody reaches out for help

For a friend or somebody else If you reach out for that help and say hey I'd like help Just bettering some part of my life Once you get that help and you better that part of your life Because you can't do it on your own You can't No you can't If I was on my own bro I would be

I'd be done long time ago I have a good network of friends Who understand my things shit and and don't relate to it but they say you know what you know do something better right and it motivates me to do something better

when I'm not with them I do whatever the fuck I do whatever the fuck I want like I said I do what I want when I want right that other side of you that that's I get that I was rebellious I had that side of me that thought I've always I've always been a rebel right and it's it's um but that's a part of like your trauma and stuff so

but whatever I'd love to see you go back to your music and shit, and I'd love to see you to get yourself clean and figure out, like, different ways or whatever. So let's keep in touch and have you back in. I like to talk to my co-host about the caller right after the call when the person hangs up. Should we do that, Robert, when he leaves?

We can do that. We've got to hurry up, and we're going to do that. I know. So Dirty Ramon, what was we supposed to call you Shanasky? Hank Chinaski. Hank Chinaski. Thanks for coming in. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Absolutely. Absolutely. You couldn't see me, but I always have people call back in. I have tons of repeat callers. My guests love them. And you're definitely someone that needs to call back in because I feel like there's like 10,000 more stories that you have. No worries.

No, I literally, we didn't even scratch the surface. Exactly. It was like a little, you know. We'll have you back on like three weeks. Chart of glass. Okay, awesome. All right. Thanks, dude.

We'll talk to you soon. All right. Take it. Take in touch. Okay. So what did you think? I mean, you could talk to that guy for three days. I know, right?

I don't even think. You know why? Because I like that. Maybe that's, like, bad for my callers. I like to get it. Like, I want to know what's all behind that. Do you know what I'm saying? You should never have somebody in studio again, though.

Why? I mean, look, man. You think it's more uncomfortable for them to be honest, right? No, I think the guy was a sweet guy. Mm-hmm. I don't think we ever had any problem or anything to worry about. Mm-hmm. But when you watch somebody who says, you know, it was in jail.

and they're, you know, trucking down bourbon and booze and they're, you know, you know, if something happens, if I, you know, if I'm not here and it's just, you know. Oh, I would have never done it by myself, never. But even if I'm here, it's a, you know, there's potential problems. It's alcohol, you're a manly guy. Yeah, but I got to, I don't, you wouldn't, I wouldn't want to do any, I wouldn't want to do that. I'm choking. Okay.

You know what I mean? I wouldn't want to even get into that realm. Mm-hmm. So I think that, you know, phone calls with people, you know, I think I learned something. I wouldn't have, you know, pimps or, you know, prostitutes or people who have been addicted to drugs or still drinks. I wouldn't, you know, it's a weird. You had the dominatrix on your show. She was getting paid for sex and shit.

Like, you've had people like that on your show. What dominatrix? I had her in my show. Yeah, but I didn't know. She was a comedian. I didn't know she did all this shit. No, she wasn't a comedian. That's the escort.

This was the other one. She was a straight-up dominatia. She got paid to beat the shit out of people. I never had a... Oh, that's a friend of mine's girlfriend. Okay, well, but, you know... I had a friend of mine's girlfriend. Okay, but he's a friend of somebody's girlfriend.

There's a big difference between somebody... One sipping half of a bottle of bourbon in front of me. You didn't see what was going on. No, I didn't, because I didn't see him. I saw a picture of him, but he told me I had a time that he drinks a lot. And that makes him... It was a really sweet guy. I mean, I didn't feel any problem with it.

Yeah, he's a real sweet guy, and I think he really, he does a lot of crazy shit. And I don't know if I agree with it, but I mean, I think what you said to him was right. Yeah, when I hear that, I feel, I hear myself in him when he says, like, I'm just bored and I'm just rebellious and like, all, you know what I mean? Didn't you have that sort of attitude when you were younger too? It's like a, you know, you defend your sort of acting out, you know, and it's not really who you are. I don't know who the fuck he is. I felt like he double talked a lot. he said one thing and then another, you know, and things didn't make sense to me. Like, you know what I mean? I'm bisexual, but I don't really like to Floroma guys. I had relationships, but I never have sex with guys. You know, there's a lot of stuff that to me doesn't make sense. And that's somebody that doesn't really, I don't even think he's sort of attached to what he's doing. You know, he's just acting out. It's not really who he is. I don't believe any of that is. I don't, I don't buy into. I just do it because I'm bored and I like to do this and I'm, you know, that's all the, the, that's like the, you know, that's just the bullshit.

Yeah, but like anything, drugs, alcohol, sex, once you step over the line and it's not hard to do anymore, you know, get a hooker, beer hooker, drink, drink, it's hard to come back from that. No, and alcohol is the best thing because it's so easy to get. You know, it's hard. Like, I mean, as an addict, I never, like, like, wanted to, like, Coke too much because I would have never been able to fund that addiction. You know what I mean? Like, I stuck to alcohol because I knew that that was something. First of all, I'm social. I could always go out.

could do it. You know, it was like, it's legal. You know, it's like the best thing to sort of be addicted to. I mean, it's always there. But it is very violent, whatever. Yeah, I mean, like you said, though, he's like, he's using sex for an income when it's convenient. I don't know if he's, I don't think he's gay. No.

I don't think he likes guys. I think he can get money off of guys. Yeah. Especially at his age and the way he looks. You know, he can go and say, hey, you can suck me off or I'll suck you off. He's got the big we and guys who work. for that much money. Right.

So, I mean, it's... And then at the end, he said he threw out there that he made $6 million. Where the fuck did that come from? If he's charging $100 for a blowjob. He didn't make it from that. It must have been from the drugs, right? The $6 million. He didn't make it from...

He was in jail for two years. That's a long time. So, yeah, he might have got caught with a lot of drugs. Right. He must have made the money there. Yeah. I'm like, you know, he didn't sound like he was like, you know, a high class escort. No.

At all. No, he's, no, he's banging a dude from B&H. photos. Right. Is that what he said? Yeah, it was a Hasidic Chu guy. Oh. I mean, he's, he's given fucking, you know, rubbing feet. I mean, that's kind of spiny feet. Right. Yeah, but he's a genuinely really, you could tell he's a good guy. No, I know. I talked to him on the phone a bunch times. That's why I felt comfortable having him in. Yeah, he's a nice person. He's no different than anybody else that has stuff. That's why I like to sort of go a little bit deeper because I think people judge someone might judge someone like him on paper you need to talk to him again right you need to

but it needs to be over the phone because i think a phone call um i agree it was more it was very uncomfortable for me first of all to have you able to see him and me not see him it was a very weird vibe yeah okay and i think that when you're asking somebody the questions like i was when i like to go deep and he got uncomfortable i think it's worse for him to be looking at you you know what i mean well he's looking at me answering you which was weird for me Right, right. So this was weird for me. And now, you know, I mean, it's your show.

I mean, it's a weird, it was weird for me to do this, this scenario set up. It wasn't a... Because on the call, it would have been better, I think. Yeah, because we could, I, it was a, I didn't know where my eye line was. I didn't know what to do. Right. It was a weird thing. And plus, I mean, look, man, this isn't, you know, this place I'm responsible for.

If someone gets drunk and all of a sudden, I don't know what he took before he came. Nothing happened there. Okay, we don't need to go there. But I'm saying, you've always told me to just do things on my podcast and like, you know, and then just fucking talk about it. So now I know that this was something I'll never do again, right? I'll never have an in-studio person. Unless it's someone like the Maverickman or I'm going to, I want to do someone, you know, like.

I would never do it. I think that unless you have a radio station that has security and you have another room that you can be in. No, no, no, I've done my friends who do interesting things. Like I'm saying like famous people. Yeah, maybe that, yeah. But I wouldn't do this again. Right. not, he's a nice guy.

Not saying that this guy, but there was definitely, you didn't have it, but I had it because I was seeing, I was sitting here. No, my, I was behind a cardboard box. It was very uncomfortable. I could see you looking at him and being uncomfortable,

and I'm over here. And then I felt sorry for him too, because I think it was actually more uncomfortable for him as well. I think it was uncomfortable for everybody. I think it was a weird situation. But it was still, it'll be a good call. It was amazing to listen to somebody to,

to listen to somebody be that honest to just the world is fucking really amazing right you know so I think that you did a good job at the end to you didn't just say okay great thanks for your story you actually said what needed to be said to him and I think you should definitely check him with that guy and he should be part of your show he's a very interesting guy and I just hope that you know he I hope he gets help I hope he becomes better like us listen the fact that he emailed me means there's some part of him because I don't put on I don't bait and switch people on Craigslist I put out there like I'm looking for people that want to talk to me about their problems and he emailed me you know so maybe it's like oh blow job or talk about myself you know so maybe that's a good sign maybe this is his help you never know that is well a step in the right direction I give on professional advice okay I'm no fucking therapist but yeah but it's it's it's this might be his help this he came and he was really nice when he was leaving he was just you know he wanted to

talk and hang out and I wish I wish he needs an ear because he's called me like a thousand times too like I'm telling you that's what this guy needs he needs some help okay thanks Robert for being my co-host yeah it's great I know you'll never do it again but it was great bye okay I just want to tell you before you go that my book it's called strictly anonymous confession secret sex lies of total strangers is now available not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audio book. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like,

there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang-bang girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person. And they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person and I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short. Chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format, And finally, the audiobook is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me, okay? I give it to people who buy my book.

There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other, and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the e-book or the paperback. Send it to me at strictly anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you the link to

Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the strictly anonymous podcast. Do you have a story, lifestyle, or situation you can't talk about to anyone, to anyone? Or do you just want to let your freak flag fly and be on the show? Well, strictly anonymous. Wanted to hear from you. Send us an email, Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com, with your story and your anonymous name. And remember, everything is strictly anonymous.

Strictly anonymous.