Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 107 - Cirque and his Girl Give Swinging Another Try

Episode Date: January 4, 2016

Even though Cirque and his girlfriends first swinger experience went horribly wrong, they tried it again and he Cirque calls in with all the details. What exactly went down this time around? Did it wind up being better than their first experience? Will they swing yet again? Tune in to find out plus hear a whole lot more about sex and relationships. **To see anonymous pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. Craigslist is definitely the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it. The temptation is just too much.

Real problem. Does your friend know that you're banging her? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your Greek flag lie. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-hide your whips and change. Here are your hosts, Kathy Kay and Tommy. Hey, welcome to Strictly and a podcast, Kathy.

If you want to follow the show on Twitter, follow the show at Strict Anonymous or follow me at Cartoon Therapy. If you haven't subscribed to the show, subscribe. And if you can't write a review, I love reviews on iTunes or Stitcher. If you want to be on the show, I love having guests that call in with all kinds of topics. I look mostly for guests who have problems that, you know, want some unprofessional advice or people who live a secret life that want to

talk about it while remaining strictly anonymous. Um, so if you're any, if you fall into those categories and you want to be on the show, uh, send me an email. You send me an email at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. It'll have you on. Uh, today I have on a repeat caller. Someone named CERC. I really like CERC. He's been on a couple times. He, the last time he was on, It was because he had, him and his girl were, well, they started to swing together. It was like the first swinging experience that went horribly wrong. It's a really good podcast. You should take a listen to it.

It's a couple weeks back. And so what today is an update to that. After that horrible experience, they decided to swing some more. And we get the scoopage on this podcast about what happened afterwards or what happened at their second swinging experience, which by the way, was with that same couple that he swung with the first time. We talk about that. We talk about a lot of other things.

We talk about stuff that he's doing on Craigslist, the people that they've been looking at, as far as the other couples, as far as people they want to swing with and swinging in general in relationships and sex and blah, blah, blah. So anyway, Cirque is always an interesting, you know, episode, podcast guest, guest. He's always an interesting guest.

So I'm going to be right back on. on with Cirque. Do you have a story, lifestyle, or situation you can't talk about to anyone, to anyone? Or do you just want to let your freak flag fly and be on the show? Well, Strictly Anonymous wants to hear from you. Send us an email, Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com with your story and your anonymous name. And remember, everything is strictly anonymous. Strictly Anonymous Hey, sir, welcome to Strictly Anonymous Podcast for like your 16th time.

I don't know, how many times have you been on the show? Is this your third time? I think this is the, I think this is either three or, no, I think this. Right. You are, though. I mean, you do have some good stories and you have another good story. I mean, last we left off, you tried to have a threesome or, like, you tried to swing.

It wasn't a threesome. It was like you tried to swing with your girl. I'm just going to quickly update in the last call, then you're going to get into the shit that you've emailed me. And it didn't go well. You actually called into the podcast right after you found out that she like, fuck the other guy and you didn't get any action that night. And she fucked him without a condom and you are flipped out about it.

It's a good podcast if she wants to listen to it, go back. It's called like, I don't know, Cirque has a swings with his girlfriend and it goes horribly wrong. It's really interesting to hear. But you guys quickly rebounded. and got back into things immediately after that. And you have kept me, you know, sort of abreast on what was going on. Is that the right word? Sometimes I just don't have proper grammar.

You've kept me, like, in the loop of what you guys have done since then. So why don't you, you know, get us up to speed? So, like, right after that, you were really pissed off at her, right? And my thing was, don't break up with her. You obviously didn't break up with her, right? Right. And that's a good thing because you guys have a good relationship. I'll tell you what

I mean okay so we had a really shitty first experience the next experience that was kind of shitty for her because she kind of felt obligated because she'd done what she'd done and then she felt like she had to like let pay me back somehow

right meaning like she got she but how like did she did you feel like she wasn't into doing the person or I mean how do you I thought she was into this too as well. I was.

I was. And some people actually knew. What do you mean? Well, some people have found out who I know. And they listen to the podcast? Yes. Well, it's probably my fault because I love their show so much and they tell people to listen to it.

And then they're like, dude, that's you. Hilarious. But keep going. Go back to what you're about to say. So, baby, okay, my point was that, that everything started out with this thing on a bad note. It was kind of fucked up from the jump.

She did something fucked up, and then she wanted to make up for it. She kind of didn't have anything that she could say about what went on. And she didn't really love the same. I did. What was your second experience? Well, the second experience was with the same couple, because she felt like she owed it to me.

She didn't really like it and know him better. I didn't really like them enough either. He's kind of a racist. I'll tell you what. He was an asshole right up in the beginning. He fucked your wife, your girlfriend without your telling, without a condom, and you didn't even get to fuck his wife. Okay, but we always talk about this because this is like what I always say, like, you know, and this is where you guys got into trouble.

You're kind of like this, like, sort of passive person to your own life, right? Like you went out, you came out of that first experience with this couple who you met online, who you went and had a swinger experience with. The guy was a total asshole. He fucked your wife without a condom behind your back. He didn't sort of follow the plan that you guys have. But yet you didn't really have a plan because like I said, you're kind of passive in all of your sort of stuff.

It's just your personality, right? So things went horribly wrong. You just sat there like, duh. And now it sounds like you go back to the same douchebag, right? And you're kind of like, he's a douchebag and he's a fucking asshole. but like I went back and I had a great time. Like I don't know. You just seem like you sort of like sometimes do things that maybe you know aren't right or I don't know.

Like you just just. You know what it is, Kathy? What it is. Yeah, totally. You should always assume that everybody around you is a fucking complete moron because in all likelihoods they are. And they're going to do selfish shit and they're going to do some self-serving shit. And they don't even think, they don't think about anybody but themselves. and they don't follow the golden rule.

They don't do or do others. Right, but that was the first situation for sure. That would sum up the first situation. But I remember you emailing me and telling me the second situation went really well because you got it on with his wife. It went well for you. Yeah, I made that chick come like three times. I never made a chick squirt like that.

She squirted it all over me. Right. And how did you make her squirt? Like were you banging her, were you fingering her? Were you going down on it? Yeah, do everything. I went down on her and G-squared and I fucking fingers her in D-Squered and I'm like, fuck her in G-Squered. Now, did you fuck her with a condom or without a condom?

Are you kidding me? Well, I tried. Are you serious? I'm a total hypocrite, right? Am I a total hypocrite or not? Well, that's what I was just trying to explain. I was saying passive, but yeah, hypocrite was more the correct word. Yeah, you're like ridiculous.

No, like you sit here and talk about the population that you think are stupid and you should just believe that they're stupid and I feel like people are now like, he's fucking stupid too. You're a member of that. This is what I mean. no, Kathy, I felt like I could do whatever the fuck I wanted. Like, you fuck my girl without a condom. I couldn't. I know, I'm just going to tell you a life lesson, okay?

This is what I believe. So we're not 15, okay? If we were 15, I'd be like, yeah, revenge, fuck this shit out of his wife without a condom, do whatever she did to you tenfold. You don't know what you do when you're 15. But when you're like, an adult, okay? Kathy, I tried. You're not listening to me.

No, you don't give you a life lesson. Shut up. Okay, listen, this is what I love. I tried. I'm not telling you. You don't even know what I'm going to say. All I'm going to say. CERC is that

you never well you're just using it to as an excuse right now but you never want to no matter what anyone does to you like you never want to lower sort of your standards to be as bad as them like you should always be whoever you are and if that's somebody that would never

do that then you don't do it you don't do something you'd never do just to get back to somebody if that's the way that you are then that's fine and what you just said that sort of you think maybe I didn't hear you said like I couldn't maintain an erection with that one so you always fuck people without a condom too. So you were very hypocritical in judging your girlfriend and that guy actually for fucking her without a condom because you're the same type of person and you couldn't get past it. But yet you

should have been able to because you totally understand that in that moment people just don't use fucking condoms. And that's a lot of people, you included. Right? I couldn't keep a boner. Every time I tried to put it on, it would fucking go limp. But had what happened, not happened, I wouldn't have done that. I was just like, you know what, I already fucking caught in the couple that I would have because of my girl, so I'm not really worried about her fucking safety at all. And you're right. He shouldn't lower yourself to anybody's standards. You really shouldn't because ultimately in the end, you're going to have to live with a person that you want. That's what I mean. That's what I mean. I never get, like, no matter what someone

does to me, I don't stoop to anyone's level. I'll stoop to as low as I could go. And that's with my own thing. But I don't go lower just because somebody, you know, sort of like, I don't know, fought dirty. I don't fight dirty back. I just don't because that's on my style. Right. You know, and I think that's the better way to handle yourself. You could always keep your head up high that way. To me, when

you stoop down, first of all, it's childish and it shows weakness as far as I'm concerned, you know, like seriously. Totally. Yeah. So anyway, let's get back to, who cares about my life lessons? People are like listening to your stories about you making her squirt and they're horny and they're like Kathy, why the fuck are you giving us life lessons

in the middle of that hot-ass story? Well, I think that's a good I think you have a good point though Like honestly that's I feel the exact same way Right, but you did it then because we're talking about a different scenario That probably maybe didn't even apply to that You couldn't get hard and then because you're like Oh, she did it anyway and I already basically threw her

Fuck these people without a condom so I might as well So if she has an SDD you have the same SDD You all have SDDs and you could all have happily ever after So you fuck the shit of his wife, you did everything She had sex with the guy again and did she use a condom yeah sort of kind of

same fucking situation the same situation that I was going through with his girl he was going through with him like he broke and I know

I know you probably don't know this but a dude can intentionally you can yeah there's a way that you can

fuck with it on that you know that it will right so he was kept saying oh it's broken so why not break

yeah Okay, so they screwed with that economy. But why do you think that she didn't want to do it? And you did? Because she didn't like the guy after what he did to her? Well, she didn't like the guy. She kind of didn't like the guy because he's a fucking idiot. He's barely literate.

He's a fucking hillbilly. He's a good-looking dude, but he's not very intelligent. And he's kind of adult. And he hangs out with racist, don't-ass Trump supporter. He's one of those kind of guys. But what are you? I mean, you're not sitting around having tea and, like, having conversations with these people. You're, like, having sex with them.

He's very good looking. Isn't it more just a physical thing anyway? Exactly. And that's a good point that you're bringing up because there are two types of swingers that I found in the short time that I've been involved in this lifestyle. I hate calling it back because that's what they call. And I don't even really like associate myself with any kind of group. I don't like group think at all. Yeah, me neither.

But there is a, there are two types of people. And there are women who want to get to know the guy because they don't want a fucking idiot. And then they're the opposite type where they're like, we don't even want to know your names. Right. They need to keep it that way. Maybe that makes them money. And the other way, I get the woman, like, I think women are wired a little bit differently. It's hard to just go in and physically get turned on by someone if you never even spoke to them for a second.

And sometimes for a woman, like when someone does sort of start speaking, like it ruins it for you. because women are wired a little bit more than just like through their eyes, right? They're wired through what they hear and how a person carries themselves and everything. So it could be a real like buzzkill if a guy's a fucking idiot no matter how hot he is. It's just the way that women roll. Not for men. Men will still fuck a stupid ass, hot-ass chick, right? I mean, they don't care what she comes out of her about.

They'll never talk to her again. They're not going to bring her home to their mother, but they'll fuck her. A woman might not fuck a guy if he's like dumb as a doorknome or an asshole or a woman. or whatever. I mean, if, you know. So,

so you guys have sex and this is that. But, so that's the second experience. Now, do you ever talk to those people again? After that?

Yeah. Actually, um, well, I talk to the girl once in a while just to see what's up and say that she misses us.

Mm-hmm. We wouldn't be buddies in, in any other context, you know, like I'm not really a dude that kind of wants to hang out with people that think like that.

Mm-hmm. Again, like you get into a, a situation where you're obligated to a certain extent to, in order for you to not be a complete asshole or full of shit, you kind of have to maintain an ideal that you set yourself up to, but then you don't really even, but your heart and mind isn't in it. So, I mean, we kind of have a relationship with them still, but not really. And why do you think that your girlfriend wasn't into it?

Like afterwards, like after you guys like wash up and you're done, like, all everyone fucked everybody, right? like and you guys like wash up and then you like how does that sort of end that situation you say goodbye you guys get in the car and do you guys like start talking about it and she seems like she wasn't that into it like why do you think she wasn't into it well she wasn't into it because this dude ability or sensibility no what did she say to you in the car like well did she like sort of let you know she wasn't into it was she like wow that guy was a fucking assel like he could fuck good but he's a fucking asshole like what it what went down in the car afterwards

Between you and your girl. The way the whole thing, I realized, she actually, while I was with, she got up, and then they came back, and then they did what they did. And I was doing, and I just went to sleep. And the next morning, we woke up. I tell you what, like, infamosity between her and that night, for whatever, whatever happened that night,

whether you, what it did do was it brought my girlfriend and me, it turned us on to each other two days when they're eight times that day the very next day like that's all we would do right so it made you guys way more horny for each other totally and I think that's if you're going into this kind of thing that should be the point because it's not even about it other people it's about you and the person you're with right it's about reviving maybe a sex life if you've been with one for a really long time right that's just kind of dead because it's the same person so this sort of breathes

nothing hotter than watching the person that you love enjoy your sexuality as far as I'm concerned. If you could get to the point where you're like okay, I think a lot of people cannot get to the point

where they're seeing their partner enjoy their sexuality with somebody else. You know what I mean? But if you could get to that point, then you could bring that person back to you and maybe enjoy it more there. But I think most people can't get to the point. Though there are a lot of people

that have that fantasy like I've said it before, where they do want to see their partner, fuck someone else in front of them. A lot of people could never imagine that. You know, it would make them crazy jealous. You know what I mean? So you guys have the best sex that totally, like, you know, sort of makes you guys just super horny for each other. And now how do you have your next experience? Well, we've, uh, she pretty much leaves it up to me.

Like, I, it's fucked up. But as long as it's me doing all the work, then it's always my fault. She sets you up for that, you mean you think? What was that? I'm sorry. Does she set you up for that, you think? Or you think that's just the way it always plays out? You kind of take control and then everything's your fault when it doesn't go right. I think that's just how it works with, because women really generally do take a path of role in dating.

Like they just, well, this is how a woman dates. She wakes up, she goes to work or does whatever she does in her daily life. And then she gets a dog. up and then she just goes you know, the guy actually has the man pursues, the man pursues. Yes, yes, that's what I'm saying. The woman just accepts.

Yes. Yeah. And that's kind of how it works. It's sort of like the way sex goes, right? The woman just like takes it in. The man has to put it in. It's like politics. It's like, it's like, I'm the president and she's Congress.

I don't know. Politics, sex, and neck. up policies and bills and she passes or vetoes them. And then everybody blames me. I'm Obama. I can't get nothing done. We're kind of like Obama. So anyway, so go on.

So you, okay, you're the victim. You obviously have set other scenarios up. So how many other things have you set up? Mostly. Oh, so you go out looking in regular bars and stuff for like couples, maybe that are interested? doing something? No, no, no.

Swingers clubs. I meet online. Okay, so you meet people online. Oh, and then you go out and you actually meet them. And then do you guys like have a code word that means like he's so ugly I would never fuck him? Like, does she say something to you? Like, how do you know whether she's interested in someone or not?

No, she doesn't, there's no code word. She just pretty much looks at me and looks at the day and it's like, no. Right, you could read her. So you guys just hang out at the bar. You talk to the people. and then you just go home and how do you decide to like let them know that it's not going to happen? Because normally like if you're into them, right? Like you just you get like, which swingers get it on that night that they meet them, right?

Because like you're meeting these people online. Everybody knows why everyone's meeting. It's basically to hook up, right? So then you show up at the bar. Your girl's like, oh, no thanks. And then you guys like have a drink and you're like, okay, got to go. Like does anyone sort of, I don't know, I would feel bad. I mean, because.

Yeah. Right? I mean, and have you guys been rejection? Has that happened to you? I mean, how would you feel? Honestly, I don't think we know that neither of us have been rejected. Not yet, but let me ask you, don't you see pictures of these people ahead of time? Yeah.

Okay. So what happens in person that changes your girl's mind? Well, it doesn't really see a, I mean, looks do kind of matter with the woman, but not as much. She just gets a vibe of the guy when he's talking three years. version of the guy could totally change the guy's way, right? So how many other couples

have you guys had sex with besides that first one? Just that one that's all my one. Oh, that's it? Yeah, we've gone on date for couples and it's just she's not into it. And let me ask this, because you started off this call saying that the second time that you're with these people,

you didn't think she was really then into it and she kind of did it because she was obligated. Do you think that me just overall she's not into this you know regardless of the other people and maybe that'll never happen again or do you think it's just she hasn't met the right couple honestly she's more into it at this point than I am really so she's dying to find that right couple to do it you guys just can't you know find that that perfect guy that she's into sleeping with yeah she's she's into probably more than I am just because her last experience wasn't ideal

mine kind of was but it only happened out of sort of an obligatory type thing but the thing is she's not really proactive in making it happen

another thing is like I think she's got a specific idea of what she wants and it might not necessarily be what I want you know you mean the guy in the girl, like, because she's looking at the guy and saying what she wants. Do you really care about the guy? Because you're not getting it on with the dude, are you?

No, no, but the thing is that I have to, if I don't like a guy, I'm not going to really be okay with him. He's got, he's got to be at least respect this person more. Right. Or whatever. So. I feel like guys are less picky, though, than women. right? So like, I mean, out of all these couples that you've met, did you not like any of the guys

either? No, man, I really wanted to see something happen with. And she's just like, I don't like him. He talks to him. I don't like him for whatever reason. It's kind of a weird thing where if the guy has to get along with the dude and the woman has to get along with the woman and then you can, because if you two kind of can gauge each other as like same gendered people, then you can.

Why don't you just get her drunk? Oh, that's never been a problem So even wasted She's picky Yeah Really? Like even wasted Like you get her like drunk at these little shindigs With these other couples

And she's still like no I'm not gonna fuck him Really get that drunk Maybe Yeah that's the problem How fucked up am I to like Completely inebriate my girlfriend I just will show fuck strangers

You're not the fucking one I'm the one that brought it up This is more about me than you I'm the fucked up one that's like you got to get her a little bit wasted because she's sort of looking at these guys as a regular girl through regular eyes like she wants to date them, you know, and she's just fucking them. So maybe, you know, she's not really just wired for like straight up meaningless sex and maybe the only way to get her to sort of stop analyzing it from that angle because

you're not looking to sort of date these people who gives a shit. You're looking for some good sex for the night so that you guys could then go back and hook up with each other and have a great time. So maybe if she was a little loaded, she wouldn't give a shit so much about like the personality and all these other things. That's all I'm saying. And I know that that's fucked up for me to say as a non-drinker. I don't drink for 13 years. I probably couldn't do that situation

because I don't drink. I don't know. Though I do strive to be a swinger one day. I don't know how it will happen. But I think that with, you know, when you're sort of explaining it and everything, you sounds like you guys or she does. I know you're just putting it out there and explaining the pros and like, you know, sort of how it goes down, but it just seems like there's a lot of thinking going on as opposed to just fucking. And I think that maybe it should just come from a place of physical thing. And I think

most people are a little kind of loaded when it happens. And that's why everyone just sort of gets into it and fucks and then leaves and goes home. And it's just kind of like a hazy, fun time. Whereas you guys go, your girl's like, oh, I don't like him because he talks too much. And you're like, he's too political. He likes Donald Trump. I don't want you fucking him. Like, you know, you're not marrying these people. Who gives a shit? shit. Right. And then that's, you have a point. And that's what I'm trying. Okay, so we're going out

with a really, really... Okay, now you had emailed me about a guy, okay? Is this the guy that you emailed me about? Is he a part of this attractive couple, or is that a different guy? No, that's a different guy. Okay, so first tell me about the attractive couple, because that guy was kind of interesting. Tell me first about the attractive couple that you're going

out with tonight. I met these guys on a month ago. What's the Swinger's dating site? Can you tell us? Yeah, it's called SLS. There's a bunch of... Oh, yeah, SLS. Okay, I have heard of it. Okay, so you went on to SLS.

You met this hot, attractive couple. Yeah, and this dude is... He looks like that Matthew McConaughey motherfucker. Mm-hmm. And your girlfriend has seen the pictures that had a time, too? Yeah, I showed her their pictures. This chick looks like... Uh-huh.

They really do look like Matthew McConaughey and Captain's age. They're really hot. Okay. So I'm talking to this guy, you know, and I'm building a basic rapport with this dude. And I like him. He seems like he's pretty cool. And so I gave everybody's exchange phone numbers. And we have like a four, and we decided that we were going to meet up.

They're kind of like us. They don't want to do anything on the first meet and then, you know, regroup and talk about it and then go from there. Okay. So that can maybe work for the both of you because that's kind of how you guys are. So you're ready to talk about these via email? Yeah, yeah, yeah, and text. So we'll see what happens with that. Where do you meet them?

Are you meeting them for drinks? Are you meeting them for dinner? Fuck people on a full stomach. I would rather just like not have dinner. Right, right. Yeah, of course. Yeah, why have? Great.

You know, I was foodie, so I would like the dinner first. So you're just going for, you meet up for drinks. I mean, that makes more sense. Or do you meet at someone's house? Or I guess because you guys don't think, or do you know ahead of time that you're not going to fuck them the first night? That there's no reason to go out of a house or a hotel or something like that, right? Kathy, so much, it's just like, I mean, you don't, a guy. Right.

He just hopes he's going to. You just kind of hope. And then if it works out that way, it works out that way. And sometimes, you know, it doesn't work out on the first day, but might the second or third. it might take a couple days. You know what I mean? Yeah, totally. It's totally like,

it's like your partner or somebody that you fuck and you're both dating at the same people at the same time. I think if you go to a swingers club, it's different, you know. Do you have any swingers clubs in your area that you guys get certified to?

There are a company. They cost money, you know, and the holidays. Well, not a lot, but I... Right. So you're a little. trapped on cash so you can't afford the swingers club so you do it this way so you guys are going out this couple you don't know if you're going to fuck him or not you met another guy online can we just

before we end this call i want to i want you to because you sent me this email and this guy was like oh could i get him on the show because i've had other guys one little part about this guy is he has a very small penis and he wants you to make fun of him he doesn't care about it i had a guy once who was interested in calling and he was very um what's the opposite of well hung right he had like a microween and he wanted to be sort of degraded and made fun of. That was like I guess his turn on right?

So this guy that you met online kind of had that. You said that you were looking on Craigslist looking around at people's ads. I'm assuming you were on Craigslist looking for people to hook up with or were you on Craigslist just looking for your own shit? Like what were you on Craigslist for? I just, I was just bored and just I've... Uh-huh. So you went on there

and you found a guy and what was his deal? Well, he has a really small dick And he wants to serve Has to be their servant And he's got a great body Other than his dick Besides of like half of your pinky Like your second knuckle

Yeah No, I've seen one of those in real life It's like a micro-ween It's a micro penis It exists To Google it It's like it really is that small It was the smallest

It was seriously like a baby dick Yeah it's sad It's like a deformity Totally Yeah that's sad It is kind of sad, but the thing is, too, is that, like, he was able to get an erection. Like, he... Yeah, but if it's a true microween, it doesn't get more erect than, like, an inch.

Yeah. Like, he seriously... Like, you need a roach clip to turn off him. No, I saw a guy. I knew a guy that had one, and I saw him jerk off. It's, like, the weirdest thing, because, like, there's not much movement, you know? How far can you go up there? Down an inch, up an inch, down an inch.

You know, you have to get that visual in your head. It's like really ridiculous. But you have to feel, you have to very much feel sorry for him. So he's on there. He put a picture of his wean. The rest of his body is good. And he's looking to service a couple and be made fun of at the same time? I don't think he really necessarily wanted to be made fun of.

But every sexual experience has ended up with somebody going, oh, my, just reacting. And I think he was just. just basically saying it's okay if you, I think he has a whole lot of balls and even put an ad up like that. You think he what? But I think he's got a big ball to even put an ad of like that up except for like his balls. Well, listen, he's not putting up his face and maybe that's his way of weeding out and just letting people know up front. So he doesn't, even though he says you could sort of make fun of me and everything. I think maybe he's beating people to the punch with that ad.

you know like here's my it's totally small let's fuck and I don't have to have you go like what the hell in the middle of it I personally think I don't think like as a woman I don't know that I would ever say what the fuck like I think women are kind of nice like I don't think a lot of women would say in the middle of it like what the fuck they kind of know like that that would be really mean I mean they're probably saying it in their head but I'd be surprised that a lot of people said straight up to his face like what the fuck he might see it in their eyes you know

know or in their expressions that he might be projecting his own feelings onto them. But I find it hard to believe that every person would say something about it because that's just mean. You know, I think most people would feel bad and they wouldn't like it, but they wouldn't say something about it to the guy. This is rude, you know? The thing is that he doesn't have any experience going down on girls or like making them come manually. He really doesn't have a whole lot of experience. He's 26 years old. Right.

You know, so he really needs to get his fucking game on. Like, somebody needs to, like, take this dude in and show him great in the world of, you know, sex and life. And that right there is the reason why you reached out to him, right? That's what you said to me. Yeah, yeah. So you sort of know Gandhi. You saw that ad and you were like, wow, I want to help this person. Yeah, he's a really cool guy.

But he just doesn't have any kind of game. game at all. Well, how can you? I think a lot of times game comes from dick size, you know, a lot of times like a cocky guy is like, confidence. Well, but your dick size comes, like confidence comes from your dick size. Like, I think it's hard to be really confident if you've got, if you know for a fact that you've got nothing going on down there. Do you know who Doug Stanoop is? Yeah. He does this bit. He used to do this bit a long time ago. Whereas like, by the time a chick finds out how shitty in bed I am and how small my diggers. It's too late. I already came.

Right. So he's got confidence even though he doesn't have is what you're saying? Right. He's a fucking player. By the time a chick finds out that I'm a piece of and shit, it's too late. I'm fucking, I've come already. That's what this kid needs to figure out. Like, he needs to get to get to really hard. I think that's really hard. There's one thing about being

kind of small. There's another thing with being like deformed small. I think it's a hard thing to teach. Like, I give you credit if you want to be the person that's sort of like Oprah get in there and sort of change his guy's life. But I think that that's really hard. I think it's really hard to be a total player game person. You know, when you know that

you're going to take your pants off and you have like a dick the size of a baby's dick. That's what you just called it. Yeah, well, what he needs to do is he needs, I mean, there's such a thing as a lesbian in this world. This is a woman that's not impressed by cock whatsoever.

Yeah, but they want a fist. I mean, they're not going to be interested in a guy with no dick either. You would be trying to say, well, he's a dead lesbian? There's somebody that's into it, especially if he knows how to make the girl. Lesbians are into girls, newsflash. Well, he's barely a man.

Right. So why would you think that he would like a lesbian? I think that I, it's like the dumbest thing you've ever said now, or just give me your explanation, your reasoning behind it, because sometimes when you tell me your reason it makes sense. Maybe, maybe not a lesbian,

but certainly like maybe somebody, a woman that's bisexual. Okay, right. See, there are women in the world that it doesn't matter how big your dick is. That's not how they get off. Right. Like, I've only made a couple of women have an orgasm with my dick. And I'm fucked up.

Zillion chicks, but usually they have to go down on them and use my hands. And he's got a perfectly functional mouth and hands. Right. And he's a cool guy. Like, if you can carry on a conversation if you're good company, with a woman, that goes a lot farther with a woman. Well, let me ask you this. Has he ever had a girlfriend or anything?

No, that's the problem. This is what I need. This is what I want. This is what I mean, I like this guy. And I want to help him. And this is what I want to tell him. Like, you don't need to have a fucking enormous glean to make a woman happy. Right. No, there's so much more to stuff.

Yeah. And it's some girl out there that's dated fucking assholes and stuff or is really looking for a guy that's really, you know, you know, sex isn't, most of the time sex isn't the most important thing to every girl in a relationship. I think, you know, eventually down the line, like they do have to figure out other ways maybe to pleasure her. But there are so many other ways to do things, right?

I mean, especially with the guy, you know, there's so many toys that could just like extend him. There's an operation. Yeah, dude, a chick can have as big of a, a guy can have as big of a dick as he's willing to go into an adult storm by. Exactly.

You know what I mean? Like, if she wants a bigger dick to get fucked with, he can fuck her with a strap on. Right. His dick doesn't even really matter that much, especially if he's cool. If he makes her laugh, if

he takes her nice places and create some novel experiences with her, she's going to look at that more than the size of the dick. I mean, nobody, she could tell all her friends he's got the biggest dick in the world. They're not going to know. No, she'll tell her friends that he's got a really cool dick.

I can all give her advice on how to get past that if she explains that he's like a really nice guy or he's really fucking funny or he's really good looking or her last guy was such an asshole and she really likes this guy you know women are hopeful creatures well and this is the other this is the other angle that I

talked to on I'm like dude as long as you're if you're open to let like letting her fuck other guys that do have big dicks she'll fucking stay with you forever yeah but let me just tell you something about that okay but let me just tell you something about that when you're like I don't know the kind of woman that's going to

like fuck other guys in front of him is probably a highly sexual woman and I don't know that woman's gonna be happy with a small penis size. He's better off getting a woman who's a little bit uptight and maybe not that into sex that would maybe

like sort of not care about that. I don't know. That's just what I think but you know I'm I don't know what I'm not like you know the end all be all I don't have a PhD in fucking sex ed or whatever so I don't really know you know what I mean? You don't have a PhD in tiny dicks?

No I don't. I've only had one in my whole life. And so I don't know, I don't know, but I would think that, but maybe he's a, this is the weird thing. The guy that I knew that had the really small micro penis, he was like a raging pervert. He was like so out of the box when it came to sex. It was like kind of funny. It's like, you know, if there's a God, right, and he created this guy, he's like, oh,

I'm going to give him a really, like, crazy sick sex drive with the craziest imagination and make him the biggest fucking pervert. And I'm going to give him the tiniest dick. like it really is, you know, kind of fucked up, like that he was given both those things. So I don't know if this guy is that same way because he's on Craigslist, sort of putting that out there. And you also told me he was kind of buying. He's interested in like licking your calm off your girl's ass and all this stuff. So maybe he's like very sexual too, yet he has this really small dick.

I just wonder, worry that like, you know, if he meets a woman who's that same way that she's going to want something a little bit more substantial. But maybe not. You know, what do? I don't know. what I told them is like stupid word someone said this thing like that on my one of my reviews he's like for a sex expert

she really makes sex boring I'm like who are like a sexpert like who calls themselves that's so stupid but yeah I don't know what I'm talking about so I don't know so go on I don't know why I took us down that road I don't know I just feel like there's somebody for everybody totally people change people

people people they kind of evolve you know even in their sexual taste, they morphin, I'm certainly more perverted now than I used to be. And I probably won't be this way ever, forever. Yeah, you don't know. You could just open somebody up. You never know a lot of people are repressed sexually and have a lot of things in the right. You know, and if you're comfortable with somebody and they're comfortable with you, you know, you could kind of let your freak flag fly with each other. But this guy though, he's a little by too, right? And you're kind of by too, right? Do you think that maybe there's something there between you and him?

No No No I'm not really into him But I mean not that way Not in a sexual way Or he just is into like What is that thing called when you're like

You take the jizz of someone else's guy off a girl Like what is that called for a guy? What? You're talking about a cuckle Oh right right He's into that right I think he'll He'll take it in the ass

Right That's how manly It's multi dude is Is that, like, what would we call that desperate? I don't know. Like, what is that called? Yeah. When some guy will go gay just to go straight.

There's a term for it. Yeah, it's interesting. But I get it. But that means he's a little biased. I think a lot of guys want pussy, but they'll do a lot of things before they'll, you know, get fucked in the ass by a guy. I think he might be by, a little by. Well, honestly, I think to the Kinsey. Most people aren't really sort of, sort of, yeah.

Yeah, I don't really consider myself bisexual. I consider myself bi-situational. Right. That's a good term for it. Meaning, like, you never know. The situation might occur that, like, a dick winds up in your mouth and you're, like, you know, into it at that moment. Right. But it's not something that I'm going to go.

Like, if I'm into cock, I don't have to go far. Fine. There's really, literally one at my grasp at any different time. Yeah, I always tell all my guy friends. Like, if I were a guy, like, personally, and I came back in this lifetime, another lifetime, I would totally be gay. I think it's just so much more, it's so much better, like, and so much more satisfying sexually as a man to be gay, because, you know, you could just get a lot more of what you want, right, when the person you're,

like, going after is, like, on the same wavelength as you. I think women and men are very different sexually, you know, so men wind up being frustrated a lot of the time, whereas gay men, I think, of the best sex ever. So, you know, if you're open to it, like you, and you really wanted it, you'd be doing it all the time because that's, it's, you know, if you want to be gay as a guy, I mean, there's guys out there that you could fuck all the time. You know, you don't have to play as many games with them as girls. Uh-huh. It's true.

You know? Like, a guy can actually be penetrated and fucked. And not only that, but a guy has a prostate that makes it actually fucking enjoyable. It feels good. Right. A woman will met somebody on the only be a model. Right. Mm-hmm.

Totally. Yeah. And someone has that fantasy of like strapping it on, but they still won't know what it feels like. Oh, mine does. Yours does? Oh, she totally wants to fuck somebody, but she knows that she really can't.

But has she ever strapped it on and fucked you? Because you wouldn't mind that, right? Yes. Yeah, she has. I don't really love it. But because she's fucking me with something that doesn't have any nerve endings and that she doesn't have, I can feel it, but she can't and really well.

what it is is just painful for me. Uh-huh. You're not that into it. Right. I think that the woman, I mean, I had a girl on recently who told me her friend was really into it and she wanted to try it because her friend made it seem like so hot. And I think what her friend was really into and what made it such a turn on for her was sort of that power that she had over the guy.

And I think that that's what it is maybe for the woman. I've never had that desire. Um, but I know that certain women do, right? they, you know, and I think maybe it comes from that, like, sort of perspective. Because, yeah, she's not physically feeling it, but there's something that women get very turned on by in that situation. And I think maybe it is the power or the domination maybe over the man. I don't know.

Like, why does your girlfriend love it? Well, and the other thing is, too, is like, you get into the whole dom-sub thing. Uh-huh. And when a chick's being that don't kind of what they're doing But a lot of people that are into that sort of dynamic sexually That sort of sexual dynamic The Dom sub-dynamic They kind of want to do both

Right They kind of want to be a fucker And they kind of want to get fucked Right Not at the same time But like they like role reversals They like roles They're into that kind of role play type thing

Yeah And I don't know I mean, I think a lot of people aren't really honest with themselves about who they are sexually. Yeah, totally. I think sex is like, especially in our country, there's so much so. So shamed of it. Yeah, exactly. Unfortunately, because I think sex, like food and, like, money and other things in life,

like, it is a really good thing, right? And if you could take, you know, the good from it, you can have a really fucking good time. But unfortunately, there's people, like, attach a lot of bad things to it and it turns out to be something bad. and then people think it's bad, just like people think money is bad because people become greedy, or they think sex is bad because people are horrors. And it's really not. It's like what you do with it. But it is a pleasurable thing in life. And it's a good thing. And there's no reason why there should be so much badness attached to it. And especially there shouldn't be that much judgment. I mean, to me, most of the time when people are like acting out sexually, it's their own sort of thing. And it's a problem

that they're having and it's the way that they're acting out, acting it out. It's not like a horrors, a horror is a horror. Like people, I don't know why people have such a problem with stuff like that. it's a shame in fact like the shame the shame about sex is that there's shame associated with that at all yeah a shame it's a shame it's a shame that there's shame

right it's a shame that there's shame exactly it is and that's the way that is so a lot of women can't enjoy themselves a lot of men you know a lot of people are fucked up and then a lot of people get put down because of what they do and how they act out and maybe that's what they need to go through to find themselves or whatever you know but um I think we're moving more

towards a time where people are less shameful about it, we're much less repressed sexually, you know, than we ever have been. And I think that that's a good thing, you know. I certainly think that the most miserable people that I ever experience in my life are the most judgmental and the most critical of other people. Yeah, because, listen, I remember when I quit drinking,

and like I would say maybe six months into being very sober, I said to one of my friends, Robert Kelly, actually, the comedian that I talk to a lot, who's sober too. I said, you know, how come I like people more now that I'm not drinking? He said, because Kathy, now you're looking at yourself in the mirror. So you don't need to distract yourself by looking at everybody else. And he was exactly right. Miserable people do that because it's a way of just not focusing on their own life and looking at their own problems. So it's like a projection of what is inside of themselves and they're not working on. So they just constantly see

bad shit and everybody else because they don't want to look at that bad shit with themselves. Yeah, that's what that guy told me, and he was exactly right. You know, ever since I got sober and take care of my own life and focus on myself, I don't give a shit about anybody else, but that's the reason why those people do it. And I think that if you ever find yourself, because I've had times in my life where I get hyperfixated on what someone else is doing or whatever, and I realize, like, what is it about my life that I'm, like, checking out and getting so involved in something else than taking care of my own shit, you know, that's sort of like a cue to yourself that you're like,

you know, when you're focusing too much on someone else or you're being too judgmental, that you're too involved in someone else's life because you're trying probably to avoid something that's going on in your own. And you need to focus on yourself, deal with your shit, and move on. And, you know, then you will be a nicer, happier, less judgmental person.

Yeah, recently I saw this thing on the internet where there's this crazy motherfucker. He's running around, I think it's probably Seattle. He's not wearing a shirt, and he looks like Ian Anderson from Jeff Rottal. He's just nuts. He's obviously fucking insane. And he's yelling at people like these affirming sort of clips.

One of the thing that you said that made me think of him is that he kept yelling people, stop judging people. You can't be free if you judge people. And you can't be happy unless you're free. He's totally fucking nuts. I'm going to, I'll send you a link to it. Do you know what I'm talking about?

Have you seen it? No, no. I'll send you a link to it. This guy is fucking awesome. I mean, you don't, I... Tweet it to me, so I can tweet it to my followers on Twitter. Okay, yeah, I will. This guy's so funny.

I think he's a street performer. He just walked around, like, just being nuts. It's so funny. And he just tells people, but he's basically Charles Amanton, except for the murder part and the racist. Right. Well, she's very fascinating. Yeah.

Yeah, I like it. Yeah, send that link, and I'll actually tweet it out, you know. But, we... We get on that topic because we're talking about that guy. Can we just get, let's just wrap this up because we're going to give about an hour. But like, so this guy that you want to help that has a small penis that you want to sort of get out there so he could do his thing. Do you think that you and your girl are going to hook up with him or probably not? Like, do you know what's going to go down with that guy?

I really, a picture of himself, you know, just like a normal PG-rated pick, not of his dick, not of his body, just like of him. there's no way in hell that I'm going to be able to talk my girlfriend into doing anything sexual with this guy. He's just not, he's not attracted in any way. Okay. Other than he's just a really cool dude. He's a cool guy. Right. But he's not, he's certainly not my girlfriend's type.

I'm not even my girlfriend's type, but my girlfriend just, like, likes me because she likes to, well, she can be herself around me, you know. Right. Mm-hmm. But maybe you never know because like you say that your girlfriend's more like girls are more into personality. You say this guy's super cool. Maybe you just like bring him around and you guys become friends and you never know you guys might wind up getting it on. But you're going to meet him though. Like does he want to meet you in person?

Does he know like what you're sort of angling? I think he's nervous. Right. Like what does he think you want from him if you don't want to get it on? Like did you tell him like you want to help him? Like did you like I don't know. Because isn't he on Craigslist like looking for some SCX? I mean and you know, maybe.

He's super horny. Right. So why the fuck does he want to meet some guy that wants to, like, you know, have a psychology session with him? He might not be into that. Well, online or through email, I might have some sort of insight into how to get into a chick's pants. And to be truthful. Like, I do. I know how to fucking talk.

I can talk a chick into fuck at me. Right, right. And then so you want to impart that wisdom and he's willing to take it. Yeah, that's cool. But the thing is, I mean, and I don't know, tell me if I'm wrong, but the best, this is what I told them. If a chick knows that you're not going to go and fucking sloan and what happens between you two will stay between you. If she trusts you, she probably will let you share with her. Right, because she's not afraid of people.

Yeah, dude, women have to, they have to protect their reputations a lot more than men do. Oh, yeah, because, I mean, God forbid, people find a girl likes, you know, anal sex or something, it's a little bit out of the blacks, and people are like a whore. So, so stupid. There's a big stigma attached to women who really just like sex. Women like sex as much as men do. It's just men get high fives and women get shamed. Right. So why did he blow you off?

I wonder. Hopefully, have you set up a different time to meet up? He said he had to work. I think he was just, I think he was just nervous. Yeah, I think it's always weird to meet a total stranger for the first time, you know, regardless of even if you really want to and you know something could happen, that first initial meeting is probably weird, especially because, you know, he's a guy going to you for like guy advice.

I think that's really weird too and uncomfortable more so than anything else. So, but I think if he forces himself to push past that and meet you, you guys could maybe become really good friends and you probably can teach him some stuff. I know I found some people on Craigslist that were on their horny looking for sex and they called me up and after 45 minutes of talking to me, they're like, oh my God, I'm so glad I met you. Like, you really helped me with my problem. So, you know, you could turn things around. You know, you just never know where someone put it out there. And if he comes back to you and wants to meet you and, you know, he'll get something out of it if that's what he's open.

If he's open to it, you know? Yeah. And that's what's in it for me is, I mean, who doesn't feel good being helpful? Who doesn't feel good being useful? Yeah, I think some people never do it because they don't really even realize and some people are not like sort of givers in that sense. But I think what they don't get is that you do actually feel good to be of service to other people. It's like very rewarding.

And people that don't sort of do that in their life, they're missing out because I think it does feel great. It's a way of getting out of yourself. And I think that that's always great and nice. And I think it's what it's all about. So, you know, I mean, for me, that's why I do my podcast. I'm helping people total strangers all the time. Exactly. I love it.

So, yeah, I think that it's great. Hopefully he'll, you know, not be such a pussy next time and actually meet up with you instead of blow you off. I think it's uncomfortable. You know, you kind of have to push him to do that too because he lacks confidence, right? But hopefully you'll meet up with him. But, you know, what I want to hear about is that hot couple that you guys meet that you think it's going to go down. When are you supposed to meet them? Tonight.

Oh, tonight. Okay. well maybe we should have done this podcast tomorrow but it's okay I feel like with you it's hard to sort of rein you in and get a straight story straight through so we go all over the place but I'm in the past I've like really yelled at you to keep you on topic and stuff I just don't have it in me right now because I have a baby now and I have to like you know treat him like a baby so I can't treat you like a baby too I just too exhausting so I just let this podcast go here and there and like everywhere.

And I think it's interesting. You know, we've covered a lot of different stuff. We know it's an update show. You know, we probably miss the best update, which will be what goes down with these, this couple tomorrow. But, you know, we'll have you back on in the future. It'll be like your fifth time. I'll let you know how tonight goes.

All right. Good luck. And if it's worth talking about, then I'll, then we can talk about it. All right. Awesome. But definitely send me the email. Okay. All right.

Thanks so much for calling you. in again. All right. Bye. Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it.

The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show, like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person, and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But, These are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short. Chapters, easy read. You could read,

you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audio book is available coming out August 25th. But you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint. Okay. There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay. I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there.

Everybody shares content with each other. And that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total, strictly anonymous community. And you will love it.

I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. all you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook or the paperback. Send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in.

This is the strictly anonymous podcast. Do you have a story? or situation you can't talk about to anyone, to anyone? Or do you just want to let your freak flag fly and be on the show? Well, Strictly Anonymous wants to hear from you. Send us an email, Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com, with your story and your anonymous name. And remember, everything is strictly anonymous.