Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 1116 - Laura is a 23 year Old Crossdresser who Hooks up w/Guys Occasionally

Episode Date: May 16, 2025

Laura is a 23 year old crossdresser  who occasionally hooks up with guys and he called in to talk all about it. Tune in the Lear all the details including his first memories he has of putting on make up and how he felt about it, the first time he saw a c*** and how he was drawn to it, when he started wearing his mom’s clothing  and how he felt dressed up, when and why he started watching gay porn and how and why he related to it, when and how he realized he was very into trans women, how and when he went on to Snapchat and started posting pics, his first hook up with a guy when he was fully dressed and exactly what went down, the married guy he met on Grindr and what went down with him, how he met his baby momma and how sex with a woman was for him his first time, how he started wearing her stuff on the dl and how he got caught by her, how he explained himself and how she reacted, the guy he wound up meeting while dressed in a park and exactly what went down plus a whole lot more.  **To see anonymous a pics of LAURA plus anonymous pics of my female guests + get TONS of exclusive CROSSDRESSER and or HOSER episodes and content + hear all the anonymous confessions, join my Patreon Crossdresser tier it's only $8 a month for Hosers and $10 a month for crossdressers (you get also get Hoser episodes too!) and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠ MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: ⁠https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd⁠ To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: ⁠https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712⁠ or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at ⁠[e-mail]⁠ or go to ⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com⁠ and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confess while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://butterwellness.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ For 20% off your Butter Wellness perineum massager use code: STRICTLY ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bluechew.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get your first month of the new Blewchew Max FREE! use code: STRICTLYANON ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://beducate.me/pd2512-anonymous⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Use code anonymous to get an additional 10% off the campaign’s current discount - that’s 60% off ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://shamelesscare.sjv.io/xLQ3Jv⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get $10 off Shameless Care’s female viagra cream, just click on the link and use code: Strictly Follow me! Instagram ⁠https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/⁠ Twitter ⁠https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en⁠ Website ⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/⁠ Everything else ⁠https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcas Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's called strictly anonymous because most people who come on my show. I would say 99% of the people are anonymous. But if you're out and proud about your secret naughty life, you could be on the show too, okay? But I do change the 99% of the anonymous people's voices. You can make up a phony name. You can email me from a phony email. I don't care. Just email me at strictly anonymous podcast.

Atchymal.com or go to my website, strictly anonymous podcast.com and click on be on the show. If you haven't wrote a review for my show, a long time ago I started begging for reviews. I never did before my life. Now I do. And people write reviews and I love reading them. I just got one best sexy podcast, another one super hot. Everything that you guys wrote in those reviews are so appreciated by me. I read them all and I love them because I work my ass off for my show and it's so great

to know that people are listening and people love my show. So if you do love my show, hit five stars or write a review, it does actually help the show too besides making me be happy when I see them. I don't care about the trolls that write back. reviews. If you want to write a bad review for my show, go ahead. The fact that you took the time out means something. Anyway, if you have a confession that you want to leave on my confessions hotline, I have a confession's hall. You could call that number 247-347-4-203-5-79. That's 347-4-203-5-7-9. You have four minutes, leave a message. If you need longer, just call back and make sure you're in a

quiet place, okay? Most of those confessions make it on to a confessions episode, and the rest go on to my Patreon. Now my Patreon is super fun, since this is a fetish Friday episode. What's great about my Patreon is I also have two separate tiers. Each tier, whether it's the hoser tour or the cross-dressers tier, it gets one extra episode a month, an

exclusive episode. So the hoser tier gets one extra exclusive hoser episode, and the cross-dressing tier gets one extra cross-tressing episode and the one extra hoser episode. So hoser tier is

$8 a month. Crosschester, $10 a month. It's very specific. What's great about that is that you don't just get the episode for the month that you sign up. You get access to all the episodes that I aired before, right? So for $10 a month or $8 a month, you're getting access to probably 50 episodes. I don't know how many years I've been doing Patreon, but you're getting 12 extra episodes a year, a couple years. We're talking about like maybe 50 extra episodes, specifically on your fetish available to the minute you sign on, which is a great deal. You also get access to my Discord, which has a hoser and cross-dust search here as well. And right now, okay, I am doing a whole best pussy pick contest over on my Discord. I did a dick pick contest. You could still see that over

on my Discord. It was super fun. I got over like 150 dick picks. Me and Leila went through and rated them. Now we're doing a pussy pick contest if you want to put your partner up for that contest. join it. You win a hundred bucks and a clone your pussy kit, but you also see a lot of picks over there. You could get into my Discord through signing up for my Patreon. With my Patreon, you get early and ad-free episodes, plus you get every single picture of all of my female guests. They all send in hot picks. You also get all of the anonymous confessions, but you also, like I said, get access to my discord. And my Discord is a not-safe-for-work site. That's a place where everyone gets to join in and post picks and videos and talk to each other over there. It is great. My Discord is super cool. People

are hooking up over there. Like I said, there's the pussy pick contest going over there. There's so many different channels with so much content. Okay. So definitely you want to sign up for my Discord. You could also get on to my Discord by buying my book. I do have a book coming out. I work my ass off for that book too. It's coming out October 14th. It is up for pre-sale on Amazon. There's a link in my description. If you purchase the book, pre-order it, just send me a pick. And if you send me a pick of your pre-order, I will send you a free link to get into my Discord. You won't get into my Patreon, but you'll get into my Discord and you can participate in that Pussy Pick contest and I run contests all the time and you could also see all the other shit that's

going down there and there's a lot of stuff. The last thing I want to tell you about is SDC. SDC is like the world's largest adult dating website. It's not just a place where you're going to meet people to hug up with what's great about SDC and what I love about it is you could find out all the information you want to know about the lifestyle. They also have information on all the gangbanks and the meetups and the munches and the hotel takeovers and the swingers clubs in your area or all over the world. So if you're traveling, you want to go hook up or do something naughty on your trip, you could find out about it on SDC.

And the good news is I have a free trial for all of my listeners. All you got to do is put in the code 37712. That's 37712. Or just go to the description and click on the link. In my description is links to everything. that I just talked about. Okay, today I have on Laura. I don't know how to say that. I don't know how to roll the R I'm supposed to, but Laura is a cross-dresser and with a really interesting story, Laura is still very young. Okay. He got into wearing makeup when he was little. Like he talked about, you know, the first thing he really honed in on was like putting lipstick on. And then that led to a whole bunch of other things. And then him fully dressing, wearing makeup. And then adventure. it led to him finding out what he liked sexually and that was being a bottom while he was dressed. When he sought that out, he eventually went on to Grindr, he started hooking up with dudes and then

like a lot of cross-dressers, like he purged and stopped doing it for many years and then he became a trucker and then he started up again and he talks about all those experiences and all the ones when he was, you know, truck driving all over the fucking country and hooking up with dudes and he explains all those stories. And then eventually he met a girl. And he started dating her. But she wound up catching him. The whole story of her catching him and how she caught him and her reaction is very interesting.

How she reacted is very interesting. How he felt about it, very interesting. But then after that, he did have a stint where he hooked up with another guy in a park. That was a first for him. But he's still with that girl. That's the status quote. He's going to send me in a pick because he talks about how good he looks and how all the guys are always impressed with how he looks

when he's dressed up. I have those picks on my Patreon. It's a super interesting story. He's a really interesting guy. Like I said, he's super young, but he's kind of been there done that. He's got an interesting life so far. I wonder what's going to happen to years from now. But anyway, I'm going to be right back on with Laura. Laura, welcome to the strictly anonymous podcast.

How are you today? Good, good. How are you doing? Good. I know I'm fucking up your name because you're like, it's Laura. Well, you know, you do the thing with your tongue, you know, and I can't do it at all. I'm so American. Say it again?

Laura. Laura. Like it's that R, that rolling R, I can't fucking do it for life of me. And I wish I could because it's like a hot way of talking. Do you know what I'm saying? For sure. It's okay. You're close.

You're close. No, I'm not at all. But anyway, listen, Laura, you are a cross-dresser, right? And that's what we're going to talk about. And let me tell you what you are more than a cross-dresser. You're a cross-dresser that shows up for your fucking appointment, okay? That is few and far between. I would say 98% of my cross-dressers that book a call with me, or maybe 99% cancel all the time

because they make their appointment when they're dressed and in their female form. And then when the time comes that they're supposed to call, they're not in that, you know, that mode and they fucking flake. But you're here and I'm so excited. Yeah, yeah. Finally, I've been wanting to get out here and talk to you about this because I haven't told anybody like at all, anybody. Nobody knows.

Well, listen, you sound super young. Let's start where you're at now. and then we're going to go all the way back. How are you? How old are you now? Right now, I'm 23. Okay, so you are young. You sound like a baby.

Okay, so let's go all the way back, even though it's not that far. It is for me. But, all right, let's go all the way back for when you were younger, Laura. Like, what are your first memories of, like, female clothing? Like, I want to say, like,

well, not clothing. It was, like, lipstick. I remember putting on lipstick when I was, like, 10 in the mirror and just, like, I don't know, just thinking that, like wow like I don't know like it feels like we're putting on girl makeup and it was just like a rest that I got I guess a what like a rush oh so it was weird but you felt like a rush like a high like you

got off on it on some level yeah yeah yeah and I was just a little kid and I was just like because there's something that I'm not supposed to be doing you know yeah it's naughty yeah like growing up they would tell me like oh no that's that's like or like anything like any toys or anything else girl related and my dad and everybody would be like oh like you're they were telling me me in Spanish, it's just like a thing where they'd be like, oh, your balls are going to fall off if you keep playing with that, you know? Oh my God. It is so bad. And look at what they did.

They made you want to wear lipstick. That's all that shit does to a kid. It's like it does the opposite. Yeah. Yeah. It's so funny. I think the more you resist, like the more you sort of are conservative with your kids, the more they act out sexually and stuff because you make it more taboo and fun. Yeah, facts.

Yeah, facts. Okay. So you're in it like being raised. to be so macho. So when you're putting on lipstick, that's like really bad because if your dad saw that, oh my God.

Oh, yeah, especially like in a Mexican household. Yeah, for sure. And they're like very like ranch, like traditional, like old school, you know, like Mexican.

Yeah, no, a lot of cultures. I mean, it all depends, right? Some are more macho than others. Okay, so you remember putting on the lipstick

and then what happened after that? After that, I didn't really do much until like, hmm, I want to say like 13. Okay. But let me ask a quick question, and I'm going to go back to 13. Before 10, right, like when you were really young, like, did you notice anything else about dressing up or makeup or girls or anything like that before then? Kind of. Because there was like, what was it? Well, I think Jackass. I was watching Jackass had barely came out. And it was like rated R. We weren't supposed to be watching it and stuff. And there's like a lot of parts where they show like they're like Dick, you know? or they're fucking around

and I just kept I don't know why like I just was so interested and like seeing that and I don't know I was like I would rewind the movie and like because it was on my uncle's laptop and I would rewind it like just to that part so as you can see the cock I guess yeah and it was just kind of like

like what am I doing like after after like everything I was like what am I doing you know? Yeah yeah but like it's interesting right because you're so young you're too young to really understand why you are like what you're even feeling about it, right? But you're feeling something, something, you know, right? And enough of a feeling to make you want to see it more. But you don't even really realize like what that feeling is at that

age. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It's weird, but it makes sense. And I'm sure other people can relate because you're not really a sexual being at that point. No, no, nothing at all. It was just like the movie. I don't know. And that popped up and I don't know. I just kept trying to go back and see it. Oh my God. That's so funny. Okay. So now you're 13. What happens when you're 13 after the lipstick incident at 10? That's when I first, like, my mom was working and my dad was working, so I was home alone a lot. And I went into her room one day, and the same thing, I put on the lipstick, and I was just like, oh, what if I, like, put on her shirts or try on her clothes, you know?

Oh, right now you're going to do the, you're going to become the whole girl now, not just the lipstick. Yeah, not just the lipstick. So then I think I threw on, like, a dress or something, and some are like her sandals. And then I remember looking in the mirror. And honestly, I swear to you, like I saw my mom. Oh, wow. That's weird.

Because I look, that's another thing, too, that got me like that. Because I remember everybody telling me like, oh, no, you don't look nothing like your dad. You look like your mom. You look exactly like your mom. Oh, interesting. Yeah, that gets in your head. Uh-huh. Yeah.

It really did, honestly. And when I looked in the mirror that day, I was like, oh, God. Like, not see what people, you know, nice who people are saying. And you're wearing her clothes. you look exactly like her. Yeah, so then what ended up, well, after that, I never really did anything after that.

I didn't dress up like that again for a while until high school. Okay. I had a girlfriend. I tried, like, well, there's some girl that liked me and I liked her back, whatever, so we were cool. And I had a girlfriend, and it just didn't kind of, like,

it didn't feel right, you know? Oh, interesting. Okay. Well, we haven't gotten to your sexuality yet and like what your preference is, but something about you being with the girl didn't feel right? Yeah, I just, I don't know.

It is. I feel like I didn't need a girlfriend or, or I didn't, I don't know, I just didn't want a girlfriend or something. Okay. And just felt weird about the whole relationship and everything. Uh-huh. So I kind of, that's when I was like,

okay, I'm going to try to have a girlfriend and be a guy, you know? That's what I'm trying to kind of get at. Yeah, because you're like, you're like, you want to resist that. You want to fix that. You feel like that might be a problem. So you want to like, yeah. Yeah. Okay, uh-huh, make sense.

So then, uh, it didn't work out with her, so I was not like, fuck it, you know, like, I'm just gonna, or what ended up happening? After her, I think I had got on, I had, uh, started looking at porn, I guess, like gay porn, you know? Okay. So then I broke up with her and then, uh, the gay porn was just like something new to me. And like, I was just like, what the heck? Like, I've always watched normal porn and I never bothered to look up, you know? Yeah. But at that point, after the good. girl didn't work out for you, you decided, oh, let me just go see what that's all about. And did you like it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh-huh. That's what that's the little part of you that kept rewinding jackass. Yeah, yeah. And what I liked was not the not like the top part of it. It was like I kept wishing like I was going on the bottom, you know? Oh, interesting. Okay. Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah. And what I liked was not the not like the top part of it. It was like I kept, I kept

wishing like I was doing on the bottom, you know? Oh, interesting. Okay, uh-huh. So you started watching gay porn. Now, how were you feeling about the fact that you were watching it and liking it at that point in your life? I was just like, dang, like, I don't know, I want to explore. I want to be, I, I kind of, like I said, I wanted to be the bottom.

I just, it looked good and everything. When I have sex next time, I always wanted to say that. I always thought that I wanted to be the bottom. That's all, that's all like, I could remember, thing. Or like when I would get off, it would be to that, you know? What I didn't like about the, like, gay porn part was that it was just like guys, like guy on guy, you know? And what did you want in the mix? You wanted to see a girl?

No, like something like a guy, but like feminine, you know, at the time I didn't know about cross-dressers and like, uh, cissies or fanboys and none of that. Okay, so this is interesting. So like guy, girl stuff wasn't doing it for you. And then you saw the two guys and you're like, oh, this is good, but still something's missing for you there. Yeah. Oh, interesting. Okay. So then did you eventually find what you were looking for? Yes, I did. And what was that? It was a, what was it like a guy dressed up like a girl? Yeah. And they were just doing like they were just having sex, like gay sex, but it was a guy that

that was dressed like a girl. Right. And I was like, dang, that's like something I would want to try and do. Mm-hmm. But for that, I would have to learn how to dress up and do all that, you know? Right. Because When you're watching that situation, you want to be the guy dressed up, right? That's who you want to be. That's typically who's bottoming in those scenes anyway, right? Yes. Right. So it would be like a cross-dresser getting bottomed, like being the bottom to another guy.

Yes. Okay. Okay. So now you're watching this stuff and you're in, and really in that scenario, that's a scenario that's like top of the mountain for you, though. That's like what you like. Yeah. That's when I found out like, yeah, I like watching this.

and I'm gonna try it. I want, I would like to try that out. Yeah, okay. Now, at this point, let me ask you a quick question. Are you still a virgin with women? Yes. Okay. Yes, no, yeah, I didn't.

I left that girl and I didn't mess around with any girls anymore. I was just kind of curious on the other side, you know, no. Yeah, well, you're 23 now. Are you still a virgin for women or now? No, no, no, no more. Okay, go on. So now you're into cross-dressing. You want to fully dress up and be bottomed by a guy.

Yeah. But I'm in high school and I'm straight and I'm like I was not going to put myself out there like that or risk getting caught or nothing, you know? Yeah. So when it ended up happening was that I was just dressed up by myself like nothing, I would just get off to myself, you know? Yeah, you would mock up the scenario in your head, but you would dress up while you were doing it, right? Yes, yes. I would, well, my mom would be out of town or whatever. I would like go grab her clothes and my sister too low go take like her leggings and stuff and

yeah and what was your vibe when you would dress up like what what's your style when you dress up do you like classy business like what's your thing you know what's your style of dress that you prefer kind of like classy because or not classy but not slutty neither because my mom doesn't really have kind of clothes like that you know right so you were taking on her style and that's what you got used to. Uh-huh. Yeah. So, like, my mom doesn't wear leggings. My sister does. So I would, I would get one of my mom's shirts that was kind of, like, loose. And, like, it wasn't like a buttoned up shirt. It was more like a sweater, like, kind of pinkish. And I would match it with some leggings and sandals. Cute. Cass and everything, too, like, I like, I like my feet, because I have very,

like, I don't know, I don't say like cute, whatever, but I have nice-looking feet. For a guy, that's a lot saying a lot. For a guy, yes. And another thing, too, I'm really tall. I'm like, I'm six foot. But I have really small feet. Like, I have my mom's feet. What size feet do you have at six feet tall? The same size as my mom, like nine and a half. And girls. But what is it in men's?

I want to say like a 10. Wow, that's crazy. So that's a really small foot for a six foot guy, for sure. Yeah. Yeah, everybody tells me that. Because, like, my friends are kind of, I have friends that are my height. And, like, we try to, like, share shoes here and there. And, like, mine wouldn't fit.

None of my friends because I had small feet. Yeah. but you know what? You don't want to fit into their shoes. You want to fit into your girlfriend's shoes. So you actually little feet were made for you. Yeah. Yeah.

And that's what I'm saying. It's a lot harder to find like, you know, high heels in a size 13. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. So that's another thing that helped me like really dressed up because I would like sandals, high heels, I would fit into everything. Wow.

Okay. So you're in high school. Now let me ask you this real quick. Like while you're doing that at home by yourself, did you ever wind up getting busted by your sister or your mother? Oh no they would just like Wonder like where their clothes went or why their makeup was like messed up Yeah but I never got like I never got walked into or nothing

Okay so but that's what you did all through high school to get yourself off Yeah so now you're wiring yourself into this kind of a thing that's what happens for sure Yeah and without with Snapchat too I would take you know how it has like a lot of filters like a lot of girl filters I guess I've never been on Snapchat in my life Oh okay well well Snapchat has filters and well, right now they're crazy. Like, you can literally fake being a guy and fucking take a picture and you look like a girl, you know, like AI type. Oh, right.

But at the time, at the time, it was more like it just puts like makeup on you, you know, on your face. Uh-huh. And me, I don't know how to do makeup. You know, I had, I never was taught. This is how you put on mascara. This is how you, uh, what do you call it, do your blush or whatever. Yeah. And so I would wear the clothes and then I would go on my phone.

And I would take a lot of pictures because they had. the filter you know with the makeup and it would add like lashes to you but it doesn't it doesn't make you look like a girl out crazy i was just i already looked like my mom like i said like feminine you know yeah so that must have been fun for you yeah and then my eyebrows too i have like very thick eyebrows and all the girls i remember would always tell me like oh my god like do you fill in your eyebrows or what do you do with your eyebrows do you fill them in and i'm like no i'm just i'm just like i'm just like that you know yeah so i don't know i feel like i have a lot of girlie features in a way.

Anyway. Yeah, that's interesting. Your eyebrows, your small feet, even though you're tall. Now, are you slender? Yes, yes, I'm skinny. Okay, so that helps with wearing the clothes, right? You're not like a six foot bulky dude. Yeah, no, no, I'm skinny.

And I have like, I want to say, like, literally like my mom's built. Yeah, that's interesting. Okay, so now you're, and you have a high-pitched voice. You're not that deep. Yeah, that too. And it was worse when I was like 16. It was like, I sounded more like a little kid, you know? Yeah, you still sound like a little kid, which is not a bad thing.

Okay, so now you're dressing up in high school. You never get caught. Now, are you confused? Do you feel shame about what you're doing? Like, what's going on in your head secretly while you're doing all this stuff? Yes, well, I guess, yeah, I do feel confused in everything because I'm doing all this and I can't, I can't just walk out in the street and, you know, have a normal life. Like, I have to hide this from everybody. I had to take everything off and nobody can know about this, you know, to this day.

Yeah, I mean, I'm the first. person you're telling, right? Yeah, literally either. I've never talked about this to anybody at all. Because I didn't know about, I'm telling you, I don't know, I was cross-dressing, you know? I don't know that's what I was doing. How interesting, right. You didn't even know that that was the word for it. Yeah, no, I didn't, I didn't even know how to look up the porn, you know, like, like, oh, guy dressed his girl and then just a bunch of girls would pop up. Right, you didn't know how to put in cross-dresser. Yeah, I didn't know. So I guess what ended up happening was that I had all those pictures, you know, of me?

that I told you that I would put on the filter and all that. Yeah, that's not true. And I had discovered Grindr. Okay. I logged in and made an account. And I knew that in my area, it's kind of like everybody kind of knows everybody and I didn't want to put my face on there, you know? Of course. So I started like kind of posting my body, like only my body.

And then I remember the first picture I posted was like me and like my sister's leg. and like my mom's sweater, the same thing, the whole nine yards. And at that time, I was in the shower and I had painted my toenails. Oh, you're kidding. And, yeah, I had painted my toenails with the, and I was wearing sandals and everything in the picture, and I had posted it. So then I thought, look, you never, I've never been on this app. I don't know how it works, whatever. So I just put the picture on there, whatever, and I remember I went to bed.

And when I woke up in the morning to go to school, my phone was flooded. You're kidding. Like, tons of you're to tighten you up? Yes. Yeah, I want to say like, I had like 33 people. Wow. Yeah. And just, oh, hey, baby, what are you doing? This, this and that. Oh, my God. You're so cute. Let me see your face. And then they were sending me, like, pictures of like, you know, they're like, they're like dicks and all that. And I was like, what the heck? Like, oh, my God. You know, what am I getting myself into? Yeah. And then, uh, so I was always scared, like, to kind of, like, meet up with people that were my age. So I was 18. My parents work a lot, like, a lot. my mom and dad like they're sometimes it wouldn't even come home and i would have uh i had this guy come over like i first like experience being the bottom oh my god over to your house your parents house

while they're not home yes to my parents oh my good where was your sister that day was she out of the house already yeah she was out of house already and uh the only one that saw that guy come into my house was my neighbor and she knows all my friends you know like because i grew up with my neighbor right there next door. And she knows all my friends and all the people I hang out with. So she's never seen this guy in her life, you know? What she said. Did she say something to you about it?

Yeah, she was just like, hey, who's that guy that you were hanging out with in your house? And I was all like, oh, it was just one of my dad's friends because he was way old. Oh, my God. How was that first experience? Oh, it was fucking crazy. Oh, my God. I'll never forget it. In what sense?

So, well, I've never been with the guy before, and this guy was just like, he was like, oh, I remember when I opened the door for him to come in. And he saw me, he's like, oh, my God, I thought it was fake. He's like, you're so fucking beautiful. This and that. And then we sat down on the couch and we started watching a movie. So then I sat closer to him and just everything, one thing happened on top of another. And we started kissing. and it was my first time kissing guy

and it was just kind of like, everything was like crazy to me. I couldn't even believe it that it was happening. And another thing too that I forgot to tell you, the porn I was watching and all that, like, I don't know, I just, I wanted something big, you know, like a big dick. Okay.

And poor me, I never even had a dick at all, you know. Now, was this guy well hung that came to your house? Yes, because that's why I answered to his pictures. That's the first thing he said. This is how guys roll. And they wonder why. Like, this is why guys send dickpicks to girls because they think guys like, because they think like a guy, right?

Like, you're a guy. Like, you liked when he sent you the picture of his big cock, right? You're like, oh, perfect. Yes. Oh, my God. I was like, yes, come through right now. Oh, my God. Okay.

So now you're hooking up with him. Now you're fully dressed, right? Like, when he shows up, do you open the door and you're like fully dressed and everything. Yes. Yeah. So, only thing I don't, I don't like is wigs. Because I don't know. I feel like I look good on my hair. Sure. Okay. So you don't do wigs, but you had makeup on? Yeah, makeup

like everything. Everything, everything. Just not a wig. Okay. So he comes over and you guys start hooking up. And he's got a big dick. And you want to bottom. Yeah, he's got a big big. So he pulls it out. And this is what was crazy. Yeah. he pulls it out and this is my first time like seeing it like a dick like that like you know for me to touch and like pay with and stuff and this guy had a fucking huge ass like lump on his dick and i'm like i swear like a big old lump and i'm and i got like on the shaft i remember taking no no like on his like foreskin like on top oh so i'm thinking like oh like hell no this guy could

be like a cd or something you know because i had just took health class whatever so i heard i was gonna use the condom and everything. Yeah. But I was like, oh, like, I don't know. I kind of, I was like, no, I think I'm good. And this and that. And he was like, oh, no, no. Like, don't get scared.

He's like, it's like, it's like, uh, done. He said, I got it done. It's like a, for, I don't know, like an implant in your, in your penis. Oh, you're kidding. It was so poorly done that you could actually see it. It looked like a lump instead of a head. No, no, no. It was supposed to be a lump.

Like, he got it at a tattoo parlor or something, he said. Oh, like, he made. He meant to put a lump on top of his penis head? Yes, yes. Like, he had, like, a marble under his skin. So, like, when he had sex, like, the other person could feel it. You get me? Oh, okay.

Now I get you. Wow, that's weird. Oh, like, he meant to put a lump on top of his penis head? Yes, yes. He had, like, a marble under his skin. So, like, when he had sex, like, the other person could feel it. You get me? Oh, okay.

Now I get you. Wow. That's weird. Yeah, yeah, and he said that he paid to get it done and all that and like I was touching it and everything. I was like, what the heck? That's crazy. I was like, things are already huge like fuck. So then yeah, pretty much one thing led me to another.

I started like giving him head and everything and then after that is when he told me that since he's very big and I've never done it like he's going to take it easy and it's better if I go on top like I write him you know so I go on on my own speed. Yeah. Yeah. So that's what I did. And I remember, like, when at first, like, I don't know. I want to say, like, when it first, like, went in, I was just like, oh, fuck. Like, this shit fucking hurts, you know? It was like the worst fucking pain in my life.

Yeah. And then, but he took it very slow. He wasn't hard at all. Like, he didn't pound nothing, like, nothing at all. Like, he was everything in my speed, you know? But after that, we stopped talking. Like, I had, I was like, no, I can't. I can never see this guy again.

He knows where I live. Everything. I fucking blocked him. Everything. did the whole thing even though I loved it you know and it was like the best fucking I don't I want of the best I had in my life yeah it's post not clarity that's what that's called right afterwards you're like holy fuck what did I just after you come you're like what the fuck yeah yeah I'm like yeah I'm like fuck what did I do you know yeah of course uh-huh but you enjoyed the experience though

overall but you never saw him again right now let me ask you this because I did ask you whether you're virgin to women now at that point was that your first like all the way experience or had you gone all the way with a girl already? No, I had not gone all the way with the girl. My first, my first experience was the guy. Okay, so you lost your virginity to a guy before you lost to a woman, to a woman. Yeah, I guess, yeah.

Okay, cool. So now do you go back on Grindr, like, after the shame wears off? Yeah, after all that wore off and everything, I just, I kept fucking, like, daydreaming and thinking of it and, like, just having flashbacks and getting fucking horny and just fuck, like, I was even looking for that guy again, but I couldn't find him because I blocked him. So what ended up happening was, uh, I thought it, uh, I didn't want to do this to my parents.

I didn't want nobody to find out. I didn't want to get caught. So I was like, fucking, I'm just gonna delete grinder, delete everything and fucking try to live a, try to be a guy, you know? And I graduated and I got my, uh, I got, I ended up going to, to get my CDL to drive semis. That's all I wanted to do, uh, since I was a little kid too. Oh, okay. truck driver because my my uncle had trucks everything and i i was with grew up around it yeah that's like a big guy thing like little boys love trucks yeah yeah exactly and and another thing with truckers is that they always get bitches uh they always have a girl here and there and every city you know they all

listen to my show i love my truckers i get emails from truckers all the time because they're like that's how i heard your show yeah yeah yeah i love it i love it anyway go on so uh fuck you got me through a shitload just know yeah yeah yeah driving and when I was driving I was just around here local and I didn't even bother I remember thinking nothing of it like I never thought about dressing up or nothing like I was because this is more like a guy a guy thing and I would hang out around my coworkers and they're all like madly fucking guys so I just never you know yeah you never clicked over to that other part of you uh huh yeah I never clicked over again yeah never even I remember like for a couple years

I didn't even think about that anymore yeah I've heard that before uh huh oh that's because I was around here and I would always see my my my co-workers around where I'm from. Then they started sending me out because I had just got my license so they trusted me a little bit more. So they started sending me out far. Right. And this is when you start hooking up with guys while you're driving, correct? Yes, exactly, yes. So then that's when I just kept getting those urges.

And at this point, I don't have my mom's clothes, you know? Yeah. But there's Amazon. So I remember one time I was just like, fuck, like what if I just, Like just have this like totally secret life like and nobody would know and nobody would find out and I'm in a totally different city when nobody knows me, you know? Mm-hmm. And I was like, fuck it. So I pull up to a Walmart because I know a semi fits in there.

So I pull up to a Walmart. And at the time, too, I had a shitload of money. Thankfully, thanks to God, because I was working and I didn't have no bills, no nothing. I wouldn't even come home. I would just be trucking all the time. Yeah. So I had a lot of money and I would go to Walmart or like whatever. fucking like store I could get girl clothes at and I'll buy like the best like clothes I could get

sandals heels like everything you know everything the whole nine yards and where would you keep all this stuff in the semi okay so hidden in your truck well not really hidden I just had it honestly right right right I guess no one's coming in your truck right yeah nobody was coming in my truck and like I'm a young trucker looking good looking guy whatever and when other guys would like my other co-workers when they would have to, which this was very, very rare. Like only twice, they grabbed my truck to do a load in.

And they told me like, what do you have all this girl clothes in here, you know? And I was like, oh, well, I had some fucking girls with me. I just left in there. And you know, oh, you're a fucking, you're a fucking Mac and this and that. Isn't that so funny? Only because I do my show,

what I think there's another reason why he's got a bag of girls clothes in there. But before I did my show, I would think just like those guys. you know, I would believe it. You know, it's your chicks. It's your chicks clothes. You have no idea, no idea at all. Never would they think those are your clothes that you're dressing up in.

Yes. Oh, my God, that's so funny. Okay, so now you're driving up and down and now you're buying clothes, and then now do you go back onto Grindr? I mean, how do you start meeting guys while you're driving? Yeah, so I went back on Grindr. Well, the clothes, the same thing. I just started dressing up for myself.

I don't know why. I would just get the urge, and I was just dressed up. I never was like, oh, let me hit up this guy. Let me dress up like this. No. I just, I would do it by myself and I would look cute. So I would take pictures and just for me, you know, so later to get off to him, whatever. And I was just like, fuck it.

You know what? I'm just going to download Grindr again. And that's when I, like, eventually I downloaded it again. And then I had all those pictures again because I had deleted all my other ones when I was, when I was back then, you know, back in like four years ago. So I had deleted everything. And these were all new. And like, I look a little older now. And the same thing, the same fucking thing.

And here's the thing with the grinder and being a truck driver. I'm all over the fucking place. So every time I refresh, I'm in a different city. A different place is showing me different people, you know? Yeah. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? It's a good thing because then other people saw me from everywhere. You know, I would be in LA and I would log in.

And then the next day I would be in, I don't know, fucking San Francisco somewhere. And I would be logged in there. So I had fucking guys flooding me. At this point, I had like 100 and something people. Oh, wow, because you got them from all over the places that you were driving through. Yeah. And they would all tell me like, oh, my God, you're fucking beautiful, this, this and that. I would like to take you out.

What's your fucking cash app? What's your, let me send you money. Everything, like the whole fucking on yours. Like, the whole fucking on yours. Like, let me take you out. Let me buy you this. Yeah. Wow.

It's interesting that, you know, you'd never think that there's so many guys out there that are into this. I mean, it's one thing for guys to. to be into what you're into, which is dressing up and being the chick and all that stuff. But there's all these other guys, and it's the guys that are hitting you up, that are the guys that actually want to be with the guy that's dressed up. You know what I mean? There's a lot of those guys out there, too. Yeah, for sure. Okay, so now did you just start hooking up with guys?

And I'm assuming you did. Like, where would you hook up with them? Like, in hotels, in your truck, in their cars. Like, where did all this action start to go down? All of that, best. Okay, well, since you had just one experience at this point, and now you're going to start doing it again. Like, what was that second experience? Like, your first experience now as a trucker, like out of town dressed up.

Like, do you remember that first experience? Yeah, this guy was asking me to go on a date with him and that he wanted to take me out to eat and show me around and this and that. And I was not like, I honestly, I don't feel that comfortable going out or dressing like that because I'm, one, I'm not. I feel like I can't do my makeup good, you know, like, like, as a girl, like, to go out like that. Right. You don't feel like you're passable yet. Yeah, I don't feel like I'm passable, yeah. And what do you call it? The guy was like, no, just trust me, you got this and this and that. And he picked me up.

And I dressed up in the truck, right? And I put on my makeup. And he's like, holy fuck. Like, I thought it was fake. He's like, I thought it was Photoshop and this and that. You're actually fucking beautiful and fucking with you. And I wasn't really comfortable, like, kind of leaving the truck. because he picked me up right there and I just told him like just come in like fucking you know we'll do it in here

but he was in 16 to take me back to his house and at this point like fuck I don't know what if like if we fuck he's like no find your own right or something back you know and now I'm stuck looking like a girl in a whole totally different fucking city where I don't know where I'm at you know yeah of course so of course my dumb ass ends up trusting him and I go with him oh no and yeah he he literally like fulfilled his promise he picked me up took me straight to his house we didn't go nowhere we went to his house, we did what we had to do, and he brought me back. Oh, okay, good. Okay, so it didn't end poorly. Okay, so you trusted him

and he pulled through and he brought you back. And how was that experience with him? Well, fuck, let me tell you, this guy was at this point, he was my first, like, person that I ever talked to that I would like, had a friendship with like that, that was

black. And what had got me was when he sent me the picture of his dick, too, it was like a fucking horse. Yeah. And this guy was married and everything. Oh, really? And he takes you to his house while his wife's not there? Yeah, his wife was gone, yeah. Oh, my God. Can you believe what these people do when their wives aren't around? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, this is crazy. Yeah, totally. Especially with me. Like, fuck, you know, he has a whole ass fucking chick. He has a whole wife and he's over here with me.

Well, she can't give him what you could give him, right? Well, yeah, that's what I told him. So how was that experience for you? it was fuck amazing the same thing it was it kind of uh like just made me i started thinking after that i started thinking like fuck what if i just like moved to texas i was thinking just moved to texas and like just fucking be a girl like just just be trans i guess you know yeah well let me ask you this did you ever think about that did you ever feel like oh you're like a woman trapped in a man's body and you feel like you're more of a girl or do you just you like being a man most of the time but Sometimes you just want to be women because, you know, everyone feels differently about that.

Yeah, yeah. Like, how do you feel? And that's how I felt cool because when I felt like I wanted to be, I wanted to dress up. But then like, when I would get off, that's when I would feel guilty. And I would just feel like, fuck, like, I don't want to do this. Like, it's not fair to my parents. It's not fair to my family, you know? Mm-hmm.

And I, I, that's why I never really, like, went all the way through with it. Right. Because let me ask you this. When you're not horny, do you enjoy dressing up? Like, do you do it all? also just for like a release, just for an escape, or is it only purely for sex? Yes. Yeah, like you said, like a release or like an escape.

Yeah, yeah, a lot of people do it for that reason. So it's not just always you're getting off. Now, when you're dressed up for an escape, do you feel guilty and bad about it? No, not really. Right. Not in the moment. It's like always after. Like you said that guilt after.

Yeah, totally. Now somewhere along the line, you know, so you start dressing up and hooking up with guys like up and down the coast or wherever you're driving from, right? Like that becomes like a thing that you start doing a lot? Yes. Okay. But eventually you meet a baby mama. Yeah.

Okay. Driving too. Okay. So it was this girl that I had met when I was like a lot like fucking what, like 12? Mm-hmm. We had met and my friend, my cousin, I was with my cousin at the time and he walked up to her because I told him like, oh, that girl's cute. And we're 12 at the time. We're little kids, you know?

I was 13. Yeah. And she was 12. And my cousin was like, oh, I'm going to go tell her, you know. And I was like, no, no, no, no. Like, fuck, don't do that. And then when I look over, he was already fucking telling her and waving me down, you know, to go over there with her. Yeah.

So then we talked and I gave her my, my, uh, our social media is whatever. And we kept talking here and there, like off and on. And I always had that girl from when I was 12 on my social media to when I was 20. Okay. And, but I never hit her up, nothing like that. And one time I'm driving. and I was coming back into town. And I see that a police officer had a car that she would have pulled over.

And I was like, oh, fuck, it's that girl. But the officer had took her out in handcuffs. So then I was like, oh, fuck, I hit her up. And then we went on a date after that. And we just ended up fucking dating. And that's when I kind of just stopped everything, you know? Was she your first? Did you lose your rigidity to her?

Yes. Wow. okay so this was the first losing your virginity and first girlfriend that you that you wind up having yeah and everything felt right you know because it felt like i'm telling you since i met her it felt like a love story like i met her like she saved me like all that you know and she was just cool like like i would hang out of her and i enjoyed it like she made me feel like good like fucking everything and let me ask you about this because you know you're having all the sex with guys and big cock and this and that you know like that was your sexual experiences and this is what you're

typically jerking off to what was your experience like fucking a girl Like was it hot for you too? Was it just something like apples and oranges? Was it just as good but different? Or was there something missing? So here's the thing. I thought I was going to suck at it, you know? Because I've never done it.

Yeah. I've never, I've never fucked. So when we did it, she was like, what the fuck? Like, you're not a virgin. There's no way. How the fuck do you know? Like all these moves and this and that. And like, little do she know what?

I was getting bent over like that and fucking getting folded into a pretzel and shit. from all these older guys. Getting choked, fucking mask, banked, everything, you know, like everything, everything. Right. So you knew how to top, right, from all the tops you had. Yes, exactly. And I've never talked before. So I knew another thing, too, I knew, like, to, like, her speed and, like, let her do everything, you know, like, to start off and whatever. So everything fell right with her.

Yeah, but, you know, in a weird way, it's interesting. It's kind of like, because you bottomed, you kind of learned sex from, like, the girl's position. You know, most guys don't have that experience, right? They're always topping. Exactly. They've never bought them. But because you had that perspective, because you know, bottom for so many guys, you knew how to get the bottom off.

Yep. Yeah, that makes sense. Never thought about it. Yeah. And that's how I kind of put it because I was like, down, look yeah, I'm pretty good at this shit. Yeah. Because every time she would come, I wouldn't even come.

Like most of the time, she was one that would always come first. Yeah. Okay. Now, listen, at some point, she kept. matches you. Okay, dressing up or some shit like that. Like, and she gets pregnant with your baby? Like, is she your, I know she used to, you called her your baby mama. Is she your wife? Do you guys get married? Yeah, no, no, we didn't get married. We're just, we ended up having a baby. Okay. Well, we're dating. We're dating. And honestly, everything feels good. Like, I haven't gone back to the guy thing. Okay. Um, no cheating on her. No cheating on her, but I would dress up with her things now. Yeah.

Because she would go She would go to the gym And I would come back tired And nobody would be home or nothing And I saw her clothes right there And she, she, not like my mom She has like fucking like Like hold out as clothes

Or like fucking like lingerie Like all that shit, you know Like a very girly stuff, yeah Yes Yes And now she has like expensive as clothes too Like fucking expensive eyes Like louie like sandals and all that

Yeah And did you like that? yeah I ended up that's when I guess you could say like I started dressing like classier yeah and I was just like fuck it like I'm just gonna take pictures for me so when I go on the road like I just what do you call it I just jack off because I had no business

and like cheating in her or cheating on her or nothing right you were satisfied with her you're getting you know you're fucking her like you got everything going on but you still just want to dress up and that's the only thing you're doing behind your back no guy thing at all right okay yeah no guy thing nothing yeah okay So then I remember I was going out for like two weeks I was gonna go out for two weeks

So I packed two weeks of clothes And that day I had took some of her clothes And a duffel bag And I hit the road, I take off And my girl I'm telling you she has I want to say like two closets Walking closets like big fuckers Like full of fucking clothes

She doesn't, brand new with text She hasn't even touched Yeah okay So I get a bunch of clothes whatever And I take off And I remember I had hit a hotel room that day and uh i i went in early so i got dressed i fucking put on makeup put on clothes i want to go buy makeup because i was the hotel happened to be like around a sephora right so i went

there and i bought all kinds of makeup and i already had the clothes so uh i put everything on and i was just like fuck i took pictures and i downloaded a grinder so then uh i posted a a picture and the guys started like hitting me up right there and and that old your oh this guy had told me like oh send me your cash app i'll send you money right now like if you just hang out with me please and this and that and i was like fuck like okay fuck it so i had that guy send me money and stuff and i sent him pictures of me that's all he asked for in return just pictures you know and i was like oh fuck it i could do this i could do this as a side hustle you know oh okay but but you don't feel like it's wrong because you're not like hooking up with the guy just sending picks yeah okay yeah i'm just sending picks yeah

dressing up but obviously if my girl found out she wouldn't like that you know of course not yeah so i come back home and i delete on my shit or so i thought i did and uh i'm a trucker so when when i'm coming home uh i shot it straight over here like i wasn't i was supposed to pull over and sleep but i just want to come home so i fucking i blast over here and i got home tired as fuck like tired so when i got home i went into a deep sleep like fucking deal like nothing was waking me up and uh I had my phone on my pocket, Kathy. My phone was in my pocket because I knew what I had in there, you know? Yeah, but why?

Let me ask you this. Like, you know, because, like, did she have any kind of, like, trust issues with you for some reason? Like, why would she go through your phone while you're sleeping? No, we didn't really have trust issues. It's just, I don't know. Did she just, why did she take your phone out? But let me ask you this. Did she take your phone out because she's like, oh, my God, I don't want him to, like, roll over and break it.

And then she just saw something instead of rifling through it. Because, like, why is she going through your phone when you're, sleeping. No, she just literally grabbed it and went on it because she told me that she, because I told her too, like, why the fuck are you all my shit? Like if you're the first something else you're going to find, you know? Yeah. And she was like, well, you're fucking gone on the time and you don't really communicate and this and that. See, that's the answer right there. She didn't trust you. She, there was something about every time you leaving and not communicating with her enough, right, made her suspicious. Whether that meant anything or not, you just might be like a guy that doesn't

know you should fucking check in more right but for some reason it got her thinking that's how girls are I get it she's like what the fuck is he doing he's not contacting me all the time so she goes snooping in your phone while you're passed out yeah so she did have trust it like she was suspicious she didn't know what the fuck was going on and maybe you know so that's why she went looking yeah exactly now let me ask you this before she went looking did she ever say to you like you text me more like what the fuck are you doing when you're on the road why don't I hear from you like did she say those kinds the things to you and you just didn't listen? Yeah, she would tell me like, what the fuck?

Like, why don't you answer her and this is and that? And I was like, well, fuck, I'm asleep, you know, at random times because every day's different for me. Every day. I'm just asking this because I'm just going to tell, like, this is like the warning for guys. Okay, this is how girls are. Okay, I understand the girl mentality because I'm a girl, right?

And any girl could understand what your girl did. And the problem with guys are they don't fucking listen when a girl talks, okay? Your girl was telling you straight up. You know what she was saying when she would say they're like, I am going to look through your shit and find out because you're not, you know, if you don't tell me why the fuck you don't, you know what I'm saying? Like, that's like eventually that's what's going to happen. And then your girl's going

to rifle through your shit. And so if you have shit in there, you better either hide it or listen to your girl. And when she tells you to text her more and something, fucking text her more. Yeah. And another thing too, that her friends and everybody was getting in her head because she would tell him like, oh, you have your boyfriend. How come he's never with you?

And she was at, oh, well, he's always working. You know, he works very hard. And they were like, well, what does he do? Oh, he's a truck driver. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, he's a truck driver.

And what do you think her friends would tell her, you know? Yeah. Of course. They have a gut. Just like what you said about truckers, that all the truckers get the girls. Like, it's the reason why you got into trucking. Yeah. Exactly.

Yeah. Okay. So what does she find in your, in your effing phone? The fucking pictures of me. Oh, my God. And does she see them like just in your phone? Yeah. Does she see them being text out to like,

well, fucking dudes? No, no. She just saw them deleted, like on my recently deleted. Oh, my God. That was my dumb ass fault because I deleted them. I was like, fuck it. Like, I could always dress up, you know, and take more. Well, how did she get into your recently deleted?

Because recently I just went into my recently deleted and deleted them, but I had to use my face. Maybe she put your phone, your phone up to your face while you were sleeping to get into your recently deleted. Yeah, exactly. That's what she must have done. I bet you anything. because you can't get into recently deleted

or like unless you put it in the code or some shit. So she got into recently deleted and saw all the pictures of you dressed up. Yes. And at this point she stole my girlfriend. We still don't have a baby like none of that. What do you mean you don't have a baby? You have a baby right now.

Oh, this is before you had the baby. Yeah. Yeah. She's not even your baby mama. You're just dating. How long you dating at this point? Two years. Okay.

Well, that's a long time though. You're in a serious relationship with her. You're living with her. She wants to know what the fuck's going on. She finds out now. does she wake you up at a deep sleep flipping out or does she just wait until you wake up? I don't know which is worse. I think the more vicious girl waits until you wake up and then she just slowly attacks.

Dude, I fucking hurt somebody throwing up, Kathy. Oh, you're kidding. Yes. Oh, my God. Well, it was her, you know? Of course. What's wrong? I was like, what's wrong with you?

Yes. Like, do you need anything? you know you want like a medicine or something she was all like no no I'm good I just fuck oh my god I can't fucking believe this shit is she's crazy like oh my god I would have never thought in a million years like you're

like you're such a manly man like you're a fucking guy you work hard you drive semis like I would have never fucking thought and I was like what are you talking about and she was all like you know what the fuck I'm talking about and then I saw that she had my phone I didn't even realize like to check my I heard I just heard somebody throwing up so I want to go check on her

yeah of course of course yeah So I feel my phone, like that I'm missing my phone and my fucking heart just sinks. Oh my God. Horrifying. This is like the worst story. Like her reaction is like really sort of puts it all into perspective. You know how someone feels finding out, you know, that their person is living like a double life. Exactly.

Yeah. Yeah. Like she literally was like throwing up. Yeah. And then she's like, okay, we'll sit down. We're going to have this fucking talk and you're going to tell me everything. Okay. And I was like, fuck, well, all right.

Like, what do you want to know? Like, you kind of just saw everything. Like, I don't want to get into it. It's kind of like fucking weird for me, you know? Yeah. And she's like, oh, well, no, we're going to fucking talk about this. And with you, I was like, okay, what do you want to know? And she's all like, who's fucking clothes is that?

Where the fuck are you getting this clothes? Everything. How the fuck are you dressing up? And Kathy, little does she know, it's her own fucking clothes. I know. That's what I was thinking. like she didn't and did you tell her do you continue to lie at this point?

No no no I just told her I bought all that shit like I'm sorry I would go into like fucking stores and I was just go buy it and she was like oh what the fuck like that's crazy that's where all your fucking money's going what the fuck are you doing and she was like well tell me more

I was like well or she saw messages too of the guy texting me an address to a hotel oh my god and that he sent me money Oh my God What'd she say

What'd you say to that? Because she was like I saw text messages too I was like well What are you talking about She's because I thought I had deleted them But those come out If you delete your messages

They come up like recently deleted too You could check them Even if you deleted them Yeah And she was like She said who the fuck sent you money And I was like well Like that's kind of why you know now

Like that I one day I was fucking around on Snapchat I put a girl filter And I just thought I like you whatever and fucking, I posted it. I mean, I, I, I just had this little business idea that what if I just do this and sell my pictures and stuff? And she was like, so you have guys sending you money and you're dressing like a whole ass fucking girl. And I was all like, yeah, like, I'm sorry, you know?

And she's like, well, fuck, this shit better stop today. Like, I can't do this shit. What the fuck's wrong with you? You better stop this. And okay, whatever. I told her, yeah, all that's going to stop, you know? Mm-hmm. So, uh, fast forward.

I stopped doing all that. I'm all about her now, you know? She's on my case, too. It's not like I could fucking hide it anymore. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah, she's on my case. And later on, yeah, she got pregnant.

So when she got pregnant, I was like, oh, fuck yeah. Like, we're going to have a baby. Like, finally my parents were, like, going to be happy, whatever. And I honestly, I left that life behind. I didn't care anymore, you know? Mm-hmm. Then we stopped fucking me and her because she's pregnant and she just didn't feel the same way and she doesn't want to have sex for because of the baby, whatever. Yeah.

So I'm on a dress bill, you know, this whole fucking nine months. Mm-hmm. And one day I just got so like, I don't know, like the fucking, it just came back. Like it hits me like a fucking train, all the urges, everything. And I was all like, fuck it. Like, what if I just do this like one last time, you know? Yeah. And fuck it.

Sure enough, I did it again. I dressed up. and that when I'm grinder and I found this guy and he said I'm down, I'll pick you up and we'll go here and I was all like, no, like, do you have somewhere you could host like at a house or something? And he was like, no, I don't. And I was like, fuck.

He's like, it's either tonight or like never and I was like, fuck, fuck, okay. I was like, well, just pick me up. So he was like, okay, so we meet up a spot right there by my house where we live at now. And my girl was asleep upstairs and she was in a deep ass sleep. and I throw on all these clothes

and I fucking walk off the door and I've never Kathy I've never been in public like that I've never walked outside like that ever Right but you needed to seize the moment So bad that you risked everything And I was like fucking let me I'll just get my last hurrah You know and I'll forget about this forever

Yeah So I made up with that guy and fuck The same thing like uh or we went to a park Actually we went to a park And we did it in public At night It was like two in the morning. Like, there's nobody there.

You know, it was just those two. But I've never done nothing like that, like ever. So after that, I had the baby. And I was like, fucking, my baby's my everything. I got my last who we're on. I'm not going to dress like that anymore, nothing. And then she hasn't come me with anything. Not even porn.

No pictures, nothing, like at all. Like, I completely left that life. I was all about my daughter, everything. Yeah. Until she just kept fighting with me. Like, over little stupid shit, over fucking everything. nothing she was nothing can make her happy i was i wasn't being a dad i was a piece of shit i was this and that and then uh other times i was like her favorite fucking person to be with you know

so uh i just got fed up one day when she we fought and she kicked me out and i couldn't stand like leaving my baby and all that and fuck it i was like you know what you're going to do this shit like fuck you whatever and i'll leave so i got all my shit and i left and i had hit up that guy from the park and we did it again And this is the first time that, like, I've ever been with somebody, like, twice. Right. Like, the first time, like, I'm hooking up with this guy. And we kind of kept doing that for a while on the side.

And the guy would, like, tell me, like, fuck, like, please dress up for me today and this and that. And, yeah, that's pretty much how I went. And where are you at right now? Are you guys still separated you and your girl? No, no. We weren't even separated. We just fought. Like, we just fought.

We didn't break up or anything. I just had grabbed my shit and just left because I got my... Okay. Did you go back? Yeah, yeah, I went back. All right. So you're back still living with her. Are you still fighting all the time?

No, not really. I'm the happiest person now. Okay. Did she never caught you doing anything again, right? No, nothing. Okay. Have you purged it again? Or did you get your fill, like your fill with the guy in the park where you feel like

you could kind of keep it at bay for a while? Because, but most likely it's going to come up again for you at some point. I mean, it's not something that typically goes away forever. ever I've never I rarely hear that yeah well the thing is too that now I have I look more manly because uh she made me grow my mustache out oh smart bitch yeah yeah she's good because that guy back then i would never have a mustache you know she would tell me oh like you look good with it yeah yeah when she's like no you're getting a mustache you're gonna let it grow out oh my god no guy wants a fuck a girl with a mustache yeah and i don't even like that i don't like like like cross-dresses

There's some boys with mustache and shit, you know? I feel like, I'm sorry, but that's the funniest solution I've ever heard for a girl to do to her guy to get him to stop. Yeah, she said, now you're going on your mustache. And I was like, fuck it, okay, that's fine. Oh, my God. Listen, you are, you are like so young. You have been there, done that so much shit. You have a lot of shit coming up for you, okay?

Because most likely you're going to get caught again at some point with this girl. Okay, I'm sorry. Because as much as you wear a mustache and you want to keep this shit. at bay, it's going to come up again. And like, you know, kids always create tension in relationships. You're going to fight again, you know, and I just, you know, hope that eventually you guys, maybe if you do get caught again, you could be a little bit more honest with her about your situation. Maybe explain it's like a fetish and it's what you like to do because unfortunately what you resist persists. And sometimes the more you resist it, the more than you can't like sort of keep it down and it pops up even more, you know,

because it's like so wrong and you're not allowed, you know, whereas maybe if you were more honest with her, I'm not saying be honest with her and tell her you like to get bottomed by guys or anything, but maybe, you know, you need to eventually if she catches you again, you need to explain that this, you're into cross-dressing, it's a fetish, you like to do it. You'd love to be able to do it once in a while. Because, you know, maybe if you were allowed, you wouldn't feel the need to go hit up some dude in a park, you know, and maybe you guys could mock up situations of you bottoming and stuff like, I just feel like, you know, at that moment where she caught you, like instead of you being completely honest,

you still lied about everything to her. You know what I mean? Nothing was the truth. Like you didn't sort of like you didn't and that happens. That happens a lot. Yeah. Somebody at that moment is completely honest and lets everything out or they just continue to fucking lie and make it like not so bad.

But you didn't take that opportunity to be honest with her. You know, you weren't really honest about everything. This is not going to go away. You know, like I said, hopefully if you do get caught again, maybe the next time you could be more. honest and say like this is never going to go away but it doesn't take away from who I am. You know what I mean? Like I still

am that guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know and like maybe you get her to leave. See you're good. You're good. I wish I could like put words like you. No, but what I was just going to say is like and that's when you could say like you need to listen to some podcast like maybe you know because I didn't like it took me a long time to understand what the fuck this is. So like you know, but you could educate yourself. There's a lot of guys that are into this and maybe you need to listen to some of these shows that I've listened to to figure it out for myself. You know, you have to give her time to understand it. But if you ever get caught again, like I said, take that as an opportunity to be more honest so that you could finally be like not living a secret life with this girl and you could make things right with her because it was an opportunity for you at that moment, you know, and you didn't take it. And probably because you didn't want to lose her and you were afraid if you told her the truth,

you would lose her, you know. But now that you're more invested and you're like the father of her baby, I mean, you're really not going anywhere even if you guys don't stay together. You know what I mean? You're kind of bound to together. So, you know, be more honest next time and be more truthful and try to get it to the point where she could accept you and your fetish at the same time. Yeah. Well, she found out, she saw me, you know? So the only thing I was scared about is like her, like telling my friends, telling my dad, telling everybody, you know, exposing me in a way.

Well, she'll do that if she catches you again and you really fuck her over. You know, she might get more vicious next time, okay? but you know. And she always has a little alberts like like when we fight and stuff. She'd be like, oh, just fucking leave and go dress up like a girl. Of course. She's going to throw that in. But like maybe if you, it comes out in a way where you could be more honest,

like she won't use it so much against you. But like, you got both kind of like it came out. You swept under the rug. But of course she's going to bring it out and be rude about it every now and that. Yeah. No, but she tells me straight like herself that because I tell her like, oh, fuck it. Like when we fight, I'm like, well, fuck you just break up with me then. and fucking whatever.

And I tell her, just expose me, do what you got to do. Like, fuck it at this point. And she's like, no, like, you're lucky I can't do that shit because I don't want that image for my daughter, you know? Exactly. So she's not telling anybody, but maybe you could let her in on your secret and you guys could be more cool with each other. And she could have a better understanding of it.

So she doesn't hold it against you. And you could be more honest and you could dress up every now and then without it, you know, ruining your relationship because this is the mother of your child. and so you don't want to have that hanging over your head. But anyway, I love this story. Like I said, you're so young, like God knows what's going to happen two years from now. This was super interesting. Listen, I don't know if you have any pictures left on that phone of yours or whether you delete them all.

Go into your recently deleted. If you want to send me in some picks of you dressed without your face for my pageant, that would be great. If not, I totally understand that you don't have any. But if you have any that you want to send with your episode, make sure to email them to me, okay? Oh, my God. Katia, I think I'm going to throw something on. No, I don't want to get you caught, okay?

Don't, I can't, I don't want to be the one that ruins your relationship. You don't have to do it. Like, this will be aired probably two weeks from now on a Friday. So, no, dude, trust me. Like, I know your friends will love to see it because I trust me. Like, I look fucking, and not just for me, because I never thought that I look good like that. Other guys have told me and like literally wanted to pay for me and everything. Okay, so send me a pick.

Now you're going to have to. Send me a pick. I'll give you free access to my Patreon for you to see comments, you know, for the first month and then I'll also give you free access to my Discord. Okay, so I'll send you those links. Send me your pick sooner than later. Okay, and thanks so much for calling it. It was a fascinating story.

Good luck with everything. Bye, Laura. Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25.

but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories.

And they're all told in the third person, and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like Penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories.

17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audiobook is available. coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint.

Okay, there's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other. And that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook or the paperback. Send it to me at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com.

That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you. the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous podcast. Okay, okay, I just want to tell you that I do. I have a book coming out, and it's called Strictly Anonymous Confessions,

The Secret Lives of Total Strangers. I picked like 17 of the best episodes. That was actually hard to do because I have over a thousand episodes. And I retold them all in third person. So it's a little bit more erotica. But it's still like real life stories. If you like secret lives of Mormon wives, this is like the secret lives of real fucking people's wives.

Okay. There's a lot of people out there that are doing some crazy things and you get to read about them in my book. Now, it is up for pre-order. It's not out until October 14th. So what I am offering you as an incentive to get my book is free access to my Discord. If you pre-order my book on Amazon or anywhere, if you send me a pick of your pre-order, I will send you a free link to. get into my Discord. Now my Discord is super fun. There are so many different channels there with so many pictures and videos. All of my listeners are over there. There's thousands of people signed up. There's a

pussy pick contest that's going down right now. If you want to join that contest, you went 100 bucks, put up a pussy pick of your partner or of yourself. Or just join and see all the pussy picks. There's so many other things to see though on my Discord. People are literally hooking up over there. So it's a really good deal. So if you want to get in by pre-ordering my book. Go to the link in the description or a Google Strictly Anonymous Confessions book. You're going to find it, purchase it, pre-order it, send me a pick, email it to me at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you the free link to my Discord. Anyway, thanks so much for listening.