Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 1171 - Angel is in an Open Marriage and has Hooked Up with Gigolos, Women, Married Men and More

Episode Date: July 17, 2025

Angel is in an open marriage has hooked up with gigolos, women, married men and more and she calls in to talk all about it. When and why did her and her husband open their relationship? Why did they open it? How has it affected their relationship? Tune in to find out plus hear all about the couple of times she hooked up with women with her husband, how they tried swinging and why he shut it down, how he caught her corresponding with a gigolo and why he allowed her to meet with him a bunch of times, the special dom she's "dating" now and the bdsm stuff he's got her into including kneeling pics, tarnish the bride scenarios, hot wax, threesomes with other couples plus a whole lot more. REPEAT EPISODE, originally aired 07/2021 **To see HOT pics of ANGEL plus see pics of my other female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   To join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712   Want to be on the show? Email me at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[e-mail]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confess while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed.   Sponsors:  ⁠⁠https://liferx.md⁠⁠ Start your transformation now and get $50 OFF your first month, use code: ANONYMOUS ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://beducate.me/pd2520-anonymous⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Use code: ANONYMOUS to get 50% off your yearly pass plus get a 14-day money-back guarantee  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://vb.health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To get 10% off Drive AND LOAD Boost by VB Health use code: STRICTLY   Follow me! Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Everything else ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcas⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you want to be on the show, I am always looking for people to call in. Actually, every single person who is on my show emails me. Okay, I don't go and solicit anybody. Every person you hear is a listener of the show that calls them and want to share their naughty secret story. So if you have a, live a naughty secret life or not secret life, you could be out and proud and be on my show. Send me an email at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. If you want to be on the show, if you have like a just one, confession that you want to leave on my confessions hotline. You could do that too. You could call the number 247. It's 347.4-203579. Like I said, you could call that number 24-7. Make sure you're in a quiet place. Don't call me when you're driving. Hold the phone to your ear. Some of those confessions, if they're really good, make it on to a confessions episode and the rest all go on to my Patreon. Now, my Patreon is a really great deal because, listen, you're just paying $7 a month and you literally get every single episode early and ad-free. And since I do six a month, that's a lot of episodes early and ad-free. Plus, you get Q&As that I do every other time. Plus, you also get to see

every single anonymous pick of all of my female guests. They're all there. So if you listen to an episode and you thought the girl sounded hot, you could go look up her pictures. She's over there. And you also get access to my private Discord. Now, I have over 2600 people on my Patreon. So there's a lot of people on my Discord and people get super naughty over there. It's like a hookup site and a lot of action goes there. And what's great about Discord is I don't have to moderate everything. Everybody gets to talk to each other. You could post your own picks. You could post your own videos. It's a not safe for work site. So it's all locked down, adults only. So you can have fun over there. And it's a total great community. There's a lot of action. We do a lot of contests. And I have a good contest coming up.

So anyway, so if you want access to my Discord, join my Patreon for just $7 a month. You get all of that, or you could buy my book. Now I did get a book deal and I wrote a book. I took 17 of the best stories on my show and wrote them in third person and told them in my book, Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Lives of Total Strangers. Now, the book is up for pre-sell. It's on Amazon. There's a link in the description. And if you buy it ahead of time and send me a screenshot to Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com, I will send you the free link. Last thing I want to tell you about is I can offer you a free child to sdc.com. I love sdc.com. I'm not on there, but all of my callers are. That's the one adult dating website that most people love the most, that they talk about

the most. It's not just a hookup side. It's also a place where you could find out about all the action going on in your area, like the gangbangs, the meetups, the hotel takeovers, the munches, the swinger clubs, the swinger parties. It's all on SDC. And you could get a free trial if you use my code 37712. That's 37712 or just go to the description and click on the link. Okay, since today is Thursday, Thursday is a repeat episode. Okay, every Thursday I do a repeat episode. I've been podcasting for 11 years, so I have some oldies but goodies. I promise you on Thursdays, I pick the best of the best from many years ago that you most likely have never heard. Today, I am re-airing Angel. Angel does not disappoint.

She kind of looks like an angel. Wait, do you see her picture. She's super hot and really very, very pretty. But anyway, she called in to talk about her whole life with her husband and how they wound up opening up their marriage. They do have an open marriage now, but it wasn't always open. And it wasn't, she says it was vanilla, but they tried some kinky things. She talks all about their experiences.

She talks about her experience with a jigilow that she hired online and what went down there. She talks about, like I said, how her and her husband open up their relationship and then how they started banging other people. She's got a bunch of guys she sleeps with. She's slept with women. She talks about all the crazy things she does with the guys. There's one guy, okay? We focus on him towards the end.

His name is Dee. She's got a thing for D and he's got a thing for her, but he's got a wife and he's cheating. And it's a whole complicated story with that guy. there's a lot of players in this story, but it's super interesting. You're going to love Angel. I have picks of her, anonymous picks of her, over on my Patreon. She called in so many years ago. I'm surprised I didn't even think to re-air her episode earlier than now.

But anyway, it's a super great story. You're going to love it. So anyway, I'm going to be right back on with Angel. Hey, hi, Angel. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast. How are you today? Huh. Good.

So, I rolled off a holiday weekend. So Angel, if I had to sum up your email that you sent me or your story from what I get from your email, I would say you're like, you were like a vanilla housewife gone the other extreme, right? Been there, done that all of a sudden out of nowhere at 50. Things majorly change for you and you have been involved in a lot of crazy shit, right? I mean, is that true? Is that how you would sum it up? I would say the last three or four years.

years my life has been involved in a lot of crazy shit. Right. I feel like there's like two or three lives to me, if that makes any sense. Uh-huh. So, in particular since I've been married for 31 years. Or well, it'll be 31 years coming up. Right. In a month or two.

So, and I also actually feel like in some ways I've been married three times. To the same man. So to the same man. Yeah. I mean, the first part of, I was only, well, I can say this because that's not where I met now. I'm from Southern California, and he was from another state, and he sort of plucked me out of Southern California. I was your typical Southern California girl. Right.

And I was only 23. I'd graduated college, and I moved, he moved me. We met, Longocent, and he moved me to another state. And by the time I was basically 24, I was married. And I'd had very few, I mean, I'd only really had two sexual partners, and then he would be number three. Right. And I had a very long-term something and then not. So anyway, we go on our happy little world.

And, you know, there's going to be a part of this story, in my opinion, that I think your listeners will probably judge me. Maybe not. And there's a sad part, and then there's kind of funny part. Okay. So why don't you start for, like, to go chronologically? Okay. So what, you know, what basically happened was that, you know, we get married. We're pretty a vanilla couple, you know, I mean, sexually.

But one of the things about my husband is he's very emotionally immature. Very successful man, extremely successful man, very shy man, for the most part, but very immature sexually. And I had had a thing before with what I would consider a much more alpha man before I met him, but maybe I wanted something different. So we go down this path, we have our kids. You know, I would say that's when I might have been the most judgmental in my life, I'm not particularly judgmental at all. And, you know, just different things, having kids, you know, whatever.

Then, you know, I get into my 30s and we kind of really have like a hiccup. And he really, like, ignores, like, he doesn't pay attention. He talks down to me, you know. It's just, I'm dealing with one of my daughters very difficult. And we kind of have a hiccup. Matter of fact, at one point, I think he got in a fight having sex once. I don't know how you do that, but we did. Right.

During sex? Yes, we did. Yeah. And part of it had a lot to do, and I'm setting this up because it kind of influences everything else. You know, you can't ignore somebody. You can't never compliment somebody. You can only, you know, focus on what they do wrong and then say, okay, let's go have sex. Right.

And I'm not, I would be lying to you if I said that every year was horrible. That would be a wrong announcement. But, you know, I think there was that struggle in, you know, in general. And so, but by the time we had to move and we kind of worked through that sort of, just getting along, because I'm going to tell you that at one point even my mom thought I should get a divorce, but because of my background when I was a child, I was not going to divorce and I was not going to put my two children. I mean, because I would be, you know, young enough to meet somebody. I wouldn't put them in a household with another man other than their father,

because he is a great dad. So I get in my 30s, and I don't know, that's maybe one. Maybe I wanted to start becoming a little more vanilla-ish. So it's always like me bringing stuff into the bedroom, like, you know, just to keep it, you know, fun or whatever. But one time on our anniversary, we went to a strip joint. My husband is his strip joint king, let's just call him. He loves strip points.

And, oh, God. Oh, my God. Yeah. And, you know, I think I was now in a different mindset with us. And I was coming to my, this is like somewhere between the time I was like 37 and 40 right in that range. Because right now I'm the outdated speed limit of 55. Yeah. And so we go in and a few drinks and I kissed a woman and I liked it.

Right. And he was excited about this. And we kind of go back home and, you know, we kind of start something. and then we go out of town, and this is the part that's really hard, but it has to be said. So we go out of town again, and we go into a strip joint, and we're out of town, you know how the town goes. And this black, and I'm African-American black, I don't want to be rude,

she, you know, sits down with us, and her and I have a connection, like a huge connection, like beyond connection. I mean, at one point, she's dragging me into the bathroom or making out, you know, she does agree to come back to our room. She really doesn't want to play with my husband. And so we do all that. I will tell you that I have to get kudos for guys eating women out because it's a hard thing to do. It's not that easy. I'm not that good at it.

Oh, because that was your first time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, I mean, it was amazing. I'm not going to lie. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I was very situational. I felt that connection, different than the first time I just kissed somebody. This was completely different. So we get, you know, we get, you know, we get, you know, like, you know, swing. And, I, you know, I have to, I convince him to go in the swingers club and we run into my younger daughter's mother who was there. And her and her boyfriend kind of befriended. Well, wait, wait, no, no, I have to, I have to, I have to, I have to, I. can't follow that. Your younger daughter's mother, wouldn't that be you? Well, I mean, we weren't exactly friends, exactly, but I knew who she was. It was my younger daughter's, like, friend, best friend.

Okay, so at that time, my daughter might have been nine. I thought you said my younger daughter's mother. So your younger daughter's friend's mother? Right. Sorry about that. Oh, okay, you didn't say the word friends. Sorry, yeah. Okay. Yeah. And so her and her boyfriend, you know, kind of entice us to play with them and and he's really into watch. I mean, I knew nothing about any of this. Like I, you know, I kissed a girl and I liked it. Nixie, you know, I'm, you know, with this woman and, you know, she and I, you know, they want me to make out with her and before, you know, she was real aggressive and, you know, put on a strap on and, you know, and then wanted me to put on a strap on and, you know, which really was very difficult. But I'm kind of a power player. Like once I commit to doing

something, I just, I'm going to follow through. Right. And we got through that. And then afterwards, like my husband just shut it down. Like done. So, you know, going a little fast forward, you know, we end up having to move and, or we're moving, we, you know, he's making a lot of money. We're, you know, building this ginormous house and all of that. And, you know, I just go back into my suburbia housewife.

You know, we're really struggling with my older daughter with a lot of difficult problems that affected us. And, you know, instead of him dealing with it, he just doesn't come home. Like, and I'm not jealous. I never followed him. He has traveled around the world. I just, you know, I'm just, we're never one of those type of couples that were. So he's just not coming home. I'm dealing with my crazy daughter and, and putting on some weight, not a lot. I'm a pretty small person. And, but things seemed really off. And one Christmas, I just, I had really felt over the couple months, but something really spawned me that maybe he was having an affair. And all his work step is separate.

So to figure this out, and this is back in 2009 around Christmas time, like his work, I don't have access to his phone very easily. I don't. But back then, he didn't pay bills online, and I figured out how to, you know, I know everything about him, you know, we've been married 20 years, and I see all, I get into one of his credit cards, and I see all these hotel bills. local. Local.

And it was, yeah, and it was, I mean, it was like the day after Christmas. Like, I knew the day before Christmas, like my mom and everybody is at my house, and I got to hold it together. And, you know, I went to go, we're going up to his family who I love, by the way, who loved me more. And his phone is locked. And I checked the phone a couple times that just really couldn't find anything. And then when I knew, when I got back home from there, I knew something was up. And so on the 26th or 27th of December, man, I dug into it. And lo and behold, long story short, they were.

He fessed up to it and was very remorseful. But here was the thing is when I found out what he was doing, he was going into strip joints and or strip clubs, but the one he was not a nice one. It was a very dangerous one. And he now, I don't know if it kicked in, you know, his background, it was all black women. And not that I have any problem with that.

I mean, I honestly do not. I mean, but the fact that for so many years, he doesn't acknowledge me, doesn't, you know, it just became, well, you're not into me. That's what you're into, I guess, you know. Yeah. Anyway, at that point. And maybe he did have a side of himself that was into that. I mean, right?

Well, yeah. And what the big issue for me was. is where this was. Like, these girls could have had little boyfriends, followed him. I mean, he had an expensive car. My God, they could have followed us back to her and haunt him through the house. I mean, there was some, I mean, this wasn't upscale. I'm just going to say that at that time.

And so, even though he had the money for upscale, okay, but it wasn't. Yeah, but maybe he liked the dirty, dirty dirt. You know what I mean? Some people are into that, you know? Yes, I think it was always. also a better way to hide out because I will tell you even though we are very open-minded, the people he works for and all that may not have been. Want to turn up the heat in your bedroom and become better in bed?

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Just go to the description, click on the link, and use my code anonymous. And so even though you had the money for upscale, okay, but it wasn't. Yeah, but maybe he liked the dirty, dirty, dirt. You know what I mean? Some people are into that, you know? Yes, I think it was also a better way to hide out because I will tell you, even though we are very open-minded, the people he works for and all that may not have been. Right. Yeah. Okay.

And so he could hide out. I don't know. Whatever. So anyway, I put it, you know, I salvaged this. He's, you know, sorry, remorseful. I made a decision. I mean, I've never cheated. I mean, short of the two women that he saw, I had not been with any men. I was not going to revenge buck. I was going to pull it together. But as time went on, things, you know, we pulled it together. You know, he was nice for a while. It went back as the. of years went on.

Okay, so I'm going to fast forward here to the more fun part of the story. But let me ask you a quick question. Two things, two questions that came up while you're telling those parts of your story. One, why did he shut it down, you like fooling around with other women and going to swing clubs? Like, why did he shut that down? Okay. I think because he was so, he is so weirdly private, which is where that I'm telling the story in public. He's so weirdly, he just had this weird feeling like, oh, my God, what if we get caught?

Yeah, I get it. I'm like, you know, if you're there, if they're at that place, then they don't want to be, you know, he just, that was one thing. And I think that with that night with the whole strap on and all that just sort of freaked him out. I mean, this was my wife. You know, I'm not sure. He just really shut it down. Okay, cool. But he didn't want to do it.

So go back to your story. Sorry. So anyway, as the years went on, you know, we're dealing, you know, we're dealing with a horrific time with. my older daughter, really, really bad. And I, but things start turning around, you know, things are getting better with her. And now I'm starting to kind of come back into my own. Right, but let me ask you this. Like all these years have gone by since you caught him cheating.

Were you like a crazy, distrustful lunatic? Were you able to build that trust again in those years? Did it take some time, but you were able to trust him? Or like, were you always rifling through his phones? No. First of all, I'm not particularly a jealous person. Okay. I mean, I have to be, like, warranted on that.

I will say, in all honesty, it took a while. I don't know if sexually I ever turned back on to him, if that makes any sense. So, you know, I didn't really 100% follow what he was doing or anything like that at that time. He seemed to be pretty up and up. I was under such a horrific time with my, you know, 18 to 22-year-old daughter. Like, at this point, that's the last fucking thing I needed to be focused on. Okay. I mean, it was so bad.

So, yeah. But we did salvage it. We did have a couple, you know, some good years were, you know, we're traveling, we're theirs or that. But there's a big part of what wasn't being met for me. Like, he won't tell me he loves me. me. He won't hold my hand. He won't, you know, he won't, and I kind of, I kind of like, because of everything going on, I just sort of accepted that. That's marriage. This is it. You know, the good, the bad, whatever. But what happened was, it's right when things were now improving, my daughter's

doing better, and now I'm kind of coming into my own. I start drawing again. I start figuring out, you know, at 50, I think I was like 51, you know, I need to start doing things for me that make me happy because what I basically, even though I had a career, I really stopped the career, a good career. And I became everybody's servant, my kids, him, you know, and so now it was a little more about me. I started drawing again, this or that, writing, whatever. So I went to this woman's thing and there was a photographer there and I am going to tell you this, I've been professionally photographer photographs my whole life. And they wanted, as an older, she wanted to do like a burdrault set with me.

And I thought, no, okay, we can do that. I was a little nervous. It had been a long time. I mean, I was actually heavier at the time, but I was willing, I thought I'd give him this as a gift, you know. And I do this, I do these book and these photographs, I mean, my friends are like blown away by these photographs. And I give him to him, and he looks through the book and closes the book.

And I said, would you like any? And he said, yeah, they're, they're full. fine. And I'm like, fine, okay. I mean, anyone you like, well, this one's okay. Who did these? Man or a woman? I said, well, a woman. He even so much went to the point with my one daughter and made fun of them. And that... Your pictures. I mean, to your daughter. He did. Yes, he did. And so we had now started going out and I had kind of made a comment a few times like, you know, what? You could say how he looked nice. Like, you know, just, you know, I made an effort or You know, because here's the thing, and I'm going to say this,

I'm really fortunate woman that I have gotten a lot of outside attention. When I walk in a room or whatever, but the tension you want is from the one that you're most intimate with. All that's great, but having that intimate attention is really more important to me than all of the other accolades. So anyway, at that point I knew. You're going to send me anonymous picks for my Patreon? I can.

Okay, cool. I'll send you the whole picture with my face and everything. Yeah, no, no, no. I won't show anyone. I won't show your face, but you could send it to me and I'll black out your face or whatever. Okay, so go on. I will. So anyway, I at that point, decide I'm not leaving, but I've got, if something for the first time,

if somebody should approach me, and I've turned down many men over the years, trust me on that. I might consider it. So this is now the funny part to the start. So we're going to be the fun part. So me and my daughter, in their adults, we're watching some crazy jiggle-o show on, I don't know, showtime or something. And we're watching this. And I don't know. You know, I end up looking it up.

And I decide that, you know what? I'm going to make that phone call. So I. What phone call? I'm going to make that phone call. To the service. What service? Well, it is a professional jiggle.

I don't know if I should say the name of what it is. Hey, the name. No one knows who the fuck you are. Okay, well, okay, if anybody's heard, the jiggler show on Showtime, there is really a real company called Cowboys for Angels, and they are an escort service for women, and they are very high-end. And they're all across the United States.

And I went online and actually one of the more famous ones, actually has one of my art drawings, but I was not inclined to want to use him, even though I spoke with him. He's very nice. But I called the service and I picked somebody and I was said to go out of town and I was going to meet this person. And my husband did not know about it. How much do they cost? I'm looking at online. Okay, Cowboys, Four Angels.

Cowboys and then the number four angels And they're fucking hot guys, okay? Hot pods. I wonder if they go with guys too because I mean this would be a gay man's dream. These guys are all like perfect looking. But also for women, you know, let me ask you this, how much is it to book one of these guys?

Well, it depends on the hour. So, and it depends on the rating of the guy, you know, how popular the guy I like. So at the time, the guys, when I was using the service, the guy, there were several guys still that were on the show. I mean, they were more, I mean, I think, like, they were more like $1,500 for like four hours. Like some of the lower, I don't want to say lower guys because they're all beautiful guys. Or like maybe $1,200 for four hours.

And you could do an overnight. Then they have, you know, they have a whole rate breakdown on it. So you book a guy. You booked a guy. I book a guy. Okay. I book a hot guy. Actually, he was, actually he was on a cover.

of Playgirl and mental health. And he's not only with the company anymore. Okay. Anyway, so I have all the emails and stuff, but you know, that's how, you know, you just start acting different and my husband

never, you know, really paid any attention to me. And so I'm thinking, I never really withdraw that careful. Well, one day I came home and he has drunk off his ass and pissed and he had found the emails. From the cabot. Have you, had you met your

cowboy yet at this point? No, no, I set this all up like months and ahead of time. Okay. So I'd set this like months ahead of, like three months and ahead of time, you know, and so like I'm getting in shape and all that. And, you know, actually in my 50s, I actually look better at my 50s, my 40s because I lost like 25 pounds and I've kept it off for several years. Anyway, so I'm like, and that, like, help me too. Like, this is during that time. Anyway, so my, he is pissed. Like, he is, but I, here was the weird part. Like, I was, I wasn't really remorseful. Not really. Not on everything I did.

Like, you know, he's saying he's going to expose me. I'm like, take your best shot. I'll expose you too. Like, go ahead, you know. I mean, it was, I mean, it was pretty crazy that night. But we went to bed and I ended up having to go, I had an appointment the next day. And when I came home, he kind of sat down with me and he said, look, he said, it's really, you know, and he had cried all day. He said, because here he had this pristine wife in his mind now,

that now I've went on to the dark spot. And he said, you know, you've had very little experience with men. It's not fair that I've done everything I've done. To be honest, I've never really thought, like, about monogamous, and that's really right for me and this and that, and why don't you keep your day? And I said, okay. And so at that point, we started setting the rules.

You know how that goes. You set some boundaries or rules or what you think and all that. And time came and I went on the date. I flew there. He flew there. He got an escort. Your husband. So that was a part of the roles that he was allowed to fuck someone else to?

Yeah. We agreed, yeah. That's what we were going to do. That I was going to get to have a thing and he could pick one himself. I actually went online looking for one for him, helping him at all nine yards. Right. Well, is there cowboys for girls? I mean, is there cowgirls?

No, no. Okay. Okay. No. Okay. So go on. Anyway, by the way, with cowboys and stuff, it's really time you book. There's no guarantee that you're going to get sex.

So I want to be clear on that. They do not sell sex. They only sell time. Right, right, totally. You're going on a date. Between the two people. Yeah. Yeah.

So anyway, I have not really been on a date. I mean, I think I was. 52 at the time. And I picked my hot guy, and he's so sweet. He's so nice. So anyway, we end up going to the room, and long story short, you know, I mean, I'm scared out of my freaking mind, but I go through with it. And, I mean, it was very vanilla, very nice.

I mean, he's a wonderful man, to be honest with you. And I actually talked to him not too long ago. I still talk to him sometimes. And, you know, my husband does his thing, and that worked out good. And, I mean, we were like the happy couple. We're talking about it. I like hearing about it. You know, it's all good.

We kind of talk about not having any spend on nights, you know, no overnights, maybe no anal, you know, not that we did that really anyway, but, you know, just like some boundaries. But we come back in town and right away he's on another one. and I got a little upset, but I'm in this part now. I'm doing a lot of research. I'm understanding compersion. I want him to be happy. And that's when it's really like he is picking all black women.

And at this point, I'm kind of like, well, he needs to pick what he likes. You know, I want him to be happy and all that. And so we get started with our open, crazy situation. But I stick to just flying out and seeing this guy. The same guy. thousands of dollars. Oh yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I spent, matter of fact, I spent quite a bit of money doing all of that. Started with our open, crazy situation. But I stick to just flying out and seeing this guy. The same guy. So I spent thousands of dollars. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I spent,

matter of fact, I spent quite a bit of money doing all of that. And so I met him like five times. But about, I don't know, seven months into it. And I kept it in check in terms of the emotions. I mean, I really like this person, but obviously it is what it is. And as I was getting more confident, I decided at this point I wanted to find somebody local and I go online. And I'd never done anything online. And this is where my crazy story starts.

So I go online and right away, when I go online, I get a thousand hits, a thousand or two. 2000 hits. That's how many hits I get. Now, are you on there as a married woman looking a like swing on the side? Does your husband know that you're on this website doing this? Yes, okay, absolutely. Okay. Absolutely. So you're like a hot wife.

You're like hot wafing it at this point. I guess. So, but we also agreed, like he didn't want to do the swinging thing. We do things separate. He's just not into the whole swinging things. And I also want to tell you another thing that also happened to understand why the swinging probably would have never worked for us you know when two people meet when they're younger like he's 63 I'm 55 we have not aged the same and I don't mean that in a rude way it's just we're on

different spectrums on that it's met what he has learned it's much easier for me I think it's easier for any woman anyway but it's a lot easier for me right okay so I so I start you know going out on day you know like meeting my my first incident was not good And my next one, I met a, and actually I met a widower on really a cheating site. And he was a widow, not cheating, but he just didn't want to come. He was a young guy. And I, you know, we ended up having a relationship a little bit. And so I'm kind of, but I'm always honest that I'm a little bit more of a poly thinking mind.

And I, you know, there was somebody else that I go and still and go see. And, you know, I try to be as honest as I can about everything. And my husband not honest. I'll tell you that. He is not honest with the people he sees. He represents himself as being single, and that's what he likes. We pretty much do singleize them. So, you know, I have my one girlfriend who knows all about this.

She calls me Samantha. I have so many funny stories. Oh, God. I guess I could have been smart. But, so, you know, I've had a couple, like, bat, like, I'm dating. If I got fluke by somebody. I would just, I would, I would just, like, stop it. Like, I, you know, just finding the right thing, what I was looking for.

At one point, I was, like, a college girl maybe. Like, I had, like, I was doing two or three guys at the same time, like, for a while. And, which was fun, but it was still, you know, pretty vanilla. I had one that I, you know, I saw on a regular heat too was, you know, super good looking. And I've done, like, I'm actually more into really smart. apartment so they could be older, they could be younger. I won't go too young. I just don't, I'm not into 20-year-olds, so I won't go too too young. But anyway, so I kind of had a runoff where things just, I was just not really working out. I was getting a little tired. I'm in there

cleaning my inbox. I'd have a lot of dates. And this was back in January, or not January, This was March, around February of 2020. And the guy messages me, and it's a cheating site. And I've used both sides. I've used regular sites and not. And I've met several guys that were single on this other site, so I would use both. And he messages me, and he's trying to get my attention. And finally he kind of does, and he sees a picture that has a necklace that I'm wearing.

I think it's one of those redraw pictures. And he writes me and he says, I bet you're not just looking for sex. And at that point, he was right. And I said, okay, let's meet. So I meet this guy at a really nice hotel bar. It's right before COVID. And, you know, he's like an average Joe and, you know, I walk in. And, you know, the conversation starts flowing.

And, you know, he kind of expresses, you know, he kind of expresses his situation. and, you know, a little bit, and he's married, and, you know, the kind of the stale thing, I've heard it before. And, you know, normally I preferred to be with people that were open, but every once in a while, if a certain situation came up that I found was okay, I might entertain the idea of somebody who was married. I know, please don't know, I know, I know, I know, I just, but we really connect in this bar. And we're just, like, talking, and the next thing you know, like, he wants to kiss me, and he's grabbing my choker and I don't know my we go on this back kind of back part of the bar before you know my tops down and you're sucking my tits and I was like oh my god like I mean I'm somebody that I don't

even hold your hand in public hardly and and I can't believe you know and we we leave and we go on his car and we're kind of making out and come back and you know the next day he's like calling me he's like that's so hot and I'm like I'm so embarrassed I did this and but he had to tell me one of the of things that came up is that he said that he was into a particular kink. And he asked me about my necklace and I said, well, what do you mean my necklace? Because I had like a big Tiffany's choker on. And I said, it's just it was my daughter's, but she didn't wear it anymore, so I started wearing it. And he said, well, you know, I'm kind of into like kink, like kind of a, like a DS situation.

And I'm like, what? Like, D.S? Like, what do you mean about D.S? And he said, well, it's under like the BDSM stuff. Now, we'll tell you, Kathy, that I'd had two other guys that I had been involved with that scooted around this. One guy was younger, and he wanted to be called Sir, and he didn't really go into it a whole lot with me, and I was kind of like, you know, I'm 50-some, I think I was like 53, 54 at the time.

I'm like, you know what? I said, don't like it. Your other girlfriend to call you, sir. I don't see myself doing that. And then I had another guy who was really into Hot Wife, and I just, like, he wanted me to, like, with a bunch of guys. And I was like, oh, no, you need to go get someone out. But he said this D.S on the BDSM.

And I'm like, okay, I read a lot of romance, but I miss that novel on 50 Shades of Grey. What does that mean? And he starts to explain it to me. You know, he's an alpha. He says, he says, He says, you're just a natural submissive. I can feel it in you, which I am.

Like, I service everybody. And he said, I've really, you know, he said, would you be open-minded to it? Well, I like this guy. There was a chemistry. Like, yes, I've been, like, he was sort of like, he's very good looking, the older. He's, like, he's two years younger than me, two or three years younger than me. You know, but I liked him.

And I was like, well, okay, I'll try to, I'm pretty open. minded now on things. So yeah, okay, we can consider this. So next thing you know, like, I'm looking this crap up and I'm sending pictures like, you want to beat my ass? I mean, I'm sending things over to him and he's like, no, it's not like that. And he says, he says, you'll see. So we end up starting a sexual relationship and just the chemistry is off the charts just immediately. But it's still in the vanilla range. She's not going to push me too hard. And then after about a month and a half, he was like, I think

you're ready. And he would like send me, like, kind of prepare me and let me have, like, showing me pictures of what he liked. And he said, okay, I want you to go get a dress like this. And he'd show me the picture. And I said, okay. And I had, we had

two houses at the time. I had my big house. I'm now living downtown in the smaller house. And I said, well, I said, well, we'll just go up to the bigger house and so we get up there and I mean I mean he this guy blows like any 30 year old out of the water sexually he gets in your head I mean he will mind fuck you he will I mean when you're talking about foreplay the foreplay is not necessarily even touching you and and it's amazing and so he has me go put this little fishnet dress on and he's talking to me and he's telling me in my ear

what he's going to do to me. And next thing, you know, he gets me puts this collar on me. And, you know, I'm like shaking. Like, I am literally shaking. And, you know, he's telling me, don't be scared. And he is the one that really kind of gave me my name, Angel. And next thing you know, I'm on the 404s and he's, I'm crawling. Like, I don't crawl for any man.

I don't bow for any man. But I am doing that. And the next thing you know, he puts me out of this big table in the kitchen and he straps me to this table. I'm strapped to this table shaking. And he takes a big buck knife out and he rips my dress off. You want to talk about adrenaline? Oh, my God. So that kind of started the intensity of what that was.

So now I'm, I kiss up. Okay, so the other part two that I'm missing, I guess if I can dial back, was the fact that when we started to play, remember when I told you about my husband liking black women, right? Mm-hmm. Well, one of the things, because of everything that happened, I really had developed this idea that, well, if you're into that, you can't be into me. I'm blonde, blithe. I'm, you know, I mean, I get it.

That's what you're in too, so you're not into that. So in my alternative world, I want people into me. So we're in bed one day, and he were talking, and he's asking some about my husband, and I said, you know, I said, you know, he's into his thing. You know, he likes black women, and that's fine. And, I mean, he's just not into me. And I'm going to call him Dee. Dee looks at me.

He said, I need to tell you something. And I said, what? And he said, my wife's black. I almost fell off the fucking bed. I literally backed off. Like, why wouldn't you tell me that? Not that that matters, it's just that right away in my head, I go, if you're into that, how could you be into me?

Like, why did you speak me out? And he goes to me, he says, well, I don't have a type. He said, well, yes, I do, I have a type. I'm into beautiful women. My wife is beautiful, you're beautiful. I'm into beautiful women. There's my type. And for what it's worth,

I just liked him and I decided, okay, I'm just going to go down this roller coaster and continue to go down this roller coaster. And so the DS started. And now the role play. So we're playing and I mean, every time we're together and you can ask him, I mean, we do something different. And we had talked about different things. I had shared a little bit about what. I call myself, I said situationally bye, but I mean, I don't know if I'm by. I don't know. I don't know. I called situationally bye. Mm-hmm. And I said, you know, he talked about a threesome.

And this is like he tells me that he had had another sub a couple years ago. Him and his wife were open. She shut it down, which I understood that. But he kept it going with this other girl. And they, I mean, he is naughty. He is not. And he should be on your show. He's naughty, naughty, naughty.

and he said, well, you know, my other girlfriend's also, you know, she was into gangbings. I put those together for us. You know, I mean, he's told me some of that stuff. And I'm like, I just don't know. I don't see my, he said, no, I don't even want you to do that. But, you know, would you even consider a threesome? And at the time, I was really negative. I'd been asked to do threesomes by people, but I don't want to be the odd man out.

And I just wasn't sure I wanted to do that. in the way my husband is, he would be all into the other person and not even, like, acknowledge me. And I just, like, I had that fear. And he said, I just don't know if I can do it, but who knows, maybe I'll be open-minded. So we'd have a lot of talks like that. And so, you know, as we continue to play, I invited him back over. I mean, we do hotels or we can spend a night.

He travels, whatever. That was another condition that I had. And so we're at my other. house and I will remember this story for the rest of my life. So I had always, I made this like very formal dinner. I'm all dressed up. He's dress up. He gets dressed up.

You know, we play. And actually one of our workers at the, that house, almost walk in on us. And which was just a little bit scary. And so after dinner, you know, he's, you know, in my formal dining room. He's fucking me. He stops. He's like, okay, now go get dressed and put that outfit I told you I wanted you to wear. And so I go again, he says, you know, you're going to have to trust me.

And I'm like, okay. And so I'll call you when you're ready. So he goes upstairs and I have this big attic. Matter of fact, two bedrooms could be in this big attic. And he calls me and so I get ready and I go upstairs. I walk upstairs and the door is open to go into this outside room to go and there's all these candles. This is so true. All these candles live.

And I walk in and I walk up and I look and he has a cape and a beast mask on. And I'm like, oh, my fucking God. And I almost turned around. And he grabs my hand and he said, don't be scared. I'll take it off. And then it hit me. It hit me how vulnerable he had to be to put that on. I said, no, you could leave it on.

So we went into the attic and now I had been bound a couple times, but he was going to, like, I had this poster thing. He bound me to that. He, you know, I mean, and he, I mean, and we've had to work through like, he'll call me slut, my slut, my rich slut, my this, you know, whatever. And, you know, he's sucking me in the mouth. He's putting things on every hole pretty much. He's in control.

He's stopping. I mean, I mean, he is a. beast for sure. Finally, I'm like I can barely even like I'm on like my legs or thing. I can have these heels on. I can barely. He finally releases me, throws his cape on the

floor and he pours hot wax on me. He doesn't hit me a whole lot. He's not what he seems to do with me. I mean, and so he pours a wax on me. We sort of clean up and he we go, he takes me downstairs.

Okay. We go downstairs. and we're in this outdoor room and we start again and it's now we do vanilla too so it's more in a vanilla and I say to him I said oh gosh I just love it's like I cannot get enough of you and he looks at he stops and he looks at me and he says just say it and I said say what and you say you love me and just say it and I said I love you and he says I love you too and that was a big change for our relationship. But I miss up. So every day he now has asked me to start. He said, would you send a kneeling picture to me? And I've actually come to enjoy the kneeling aspect. Would you start sending me a kneeling picture every morning? So I did. And I'm sending a kneeling picture. We're coming up with new things. Like one of our other gigs is that we will be. out in public, like one time we were out of a speakeasy. I met him, and

you know, he's just all on me. I'm dressed, he likes really skanky dressing, like where my boobs are showing and all that, pretty much. And he's pretty much in the speakeasy fucking me, finger fucking me, just eating my neck. I mean, people were probably like, those people

need to go get a room. Right. You know, the whole room is, like, cleared out, and he goes to, like, try to eat me out, and I pull him back. back up and the door opens. Like we were so close to getting caught. It was unbelievable. We go back to my other house, my little house and, you know, he, I mean, ties me up, straps me up. I mean, we just go at it for, you know, hours that morning. I mean, just on and on and on.

So we kind of play that way and we kind of get started and we have a little hiccup where he's worried he's going to get caught and he pretty much breaks up with me and I tell him like, you know what, I love you enough to let you go. Like I'm not here to hurt anybody. We also have like, I mean, he talks to me about business work. I do some erotic writing. Some of our writing has to do with the stories that I, you know, I have between him and I. And anyway, so we kind of put it back together and we get to the point now where there's some talk about having a threesome. And I, we do get to a. situation where right during this breakup, what really freaked him out, there was another new thing I had to learn about him is he said that he was getting some

contact for people and that he too was in with the cuckabool lifestyle. I didn't even know what that was. Like, I knew it cuckold from old English. I did not know about the cuck bull lifestyle and that he was a bull and that he had been involved it. I guess he did like Craigslist. That's where, you know, years back. And almost to the point that I, the way he describes it, that he's more into the cuck bowl than you really is the DS, in my opinion. That, that's why I've kind of come up in terms of him. So I was like, okay, I took me back. But again, if you love somebody, you can just love the good. You got to love

the dark. Like, you know, and I've really, like, started to figure out, like, sometimes when you're, if you present something like, let's say a guy has a painting fetish, well, if someone just tells me at front like that and I'm not into them yet, that seems kind of weird to me. But, like, with this guy, he could tell me he wants to dress and drag and I'd be like, okay, let's go, you know, I mean, it's a whole different analogy for me. And he is just sort of opening me up sexually.

So we decide to go into a swingers club, and that's where we have our first bruce him. And it was with another couple in one of the rooms that they have now and do some of these swinging clubs that you can actually have sex in the club. And me and her, she's nervous, me and her start, you know, going at it. And he had actually kind of set it up because I was on the dancer dancing and talked to the husband or whatever. and before. And so he was given permission he could play with us, but I had given that I did not want another man to touch me.

And that guy was willing to watch. He got a little pissy about it, but he was willing to watch. And for a while we had the door open. People are watching me and her. Then Dee gets involved because she is equipment, and she wants them. and I just whisper in our ear and said, okay, you know, yes, you're, yes, you can't. And so it was a very interesting, good sexual after we spend.

We just walked away pretty quickly and he was pretty excited we did this. And he's had other threesome, but he was still, I think it had been a while that he'd had a girl girl three sons. so now we are kind of like something came up and he was talking about like you know maybe we need to find a girlfriend and have two subs and I was like no I don't want two subs women are like on a hierarchy I'm not jealous but I don't think two subs if you want another submissive woman that's one thing but making someone a sub and he said yeah I don't know I get it yeah so we continue on I mean because the relationship's over a year old now We continue on, and just some really tragic things happen to me, my family with COVID. And so we're kind of, I'm living in another city. My mom, her husband died, and my mom almost died, and I was taking care of them, and I got COVID, so that was not fun.

Anyway, so we finally get back together, and January hits of this year, and I go to another, he was out of working, and I go visit him on a work trip. And I know what it is other king, so, you know, is, bride. Like he likes to tarnish the bride. So I got this beautiful bride's costume and he videoed it. But that was more of a cuck thing and where he really wanted, and I feel bad about this, he wanted to hear kind of not the great things about me and my husband. And that's the way the whole cuck bull thing is, I guess. I don't know. But we do that and he videos the whole thing. and it's about an hour video.

Everything for me straps me to a door. He takes a big knife and cuts my beautiful panties off to fucking me in the ass when we're being videoed. And he's a lot to handle. Like I'm not, I mean, there's some tears going on there. And so we keep, you know, we keep going, and he has the video, and he sends me this. He's like short video, I've never really done that before.

He's had some couple little short clips before of us, but this was like a full movie. And in the video, there's very intimate moments between us in terms of not just the heavy, hardcore fucking, but very tender moments and all of that. But one of the things that have started happening between us sexually in terms of the whole BDSM thing is when he goes too hard, it's a fighter,

flights for me. I literally will like, I'll fight him. I mean, I will turn it, like, I will, like, my, it will become a fight. Like, it's like he'll, at that point, almost have to calm me down, put me in almost a chokehold. It doesn't happen often, but it happens sometimes. So, anyway, we have that kind of going on. I'm not a great sub in the sense of the protocol. Like, I, like, I'll cook for him. I'll sit by his feet. I love the kneeling, but I tend to forget the sir thing. I don't call him sir. I usually call him by his regular name unless we're in a sexual scene, then I'm better at the sir thing. And I kind of joke around. He's like, no, you're like perfect. I'm with me. This is, you know, and so I think everything is, you know, good. But I,

But somehow, again, I think it's that women's into, you know, things start feeling a little off. And we use a different app to communicate. I mean, I can use all. He has so many phones I use. It didn't really matter. And so his birthday's coming up. And what I decided for his birthday that we would go to a strip joint, I was going to take him to a drip joint.

And I was going to get us an escort, him an escort. and we were going to have a threesome, and I do. And she's quite lovely. And it was probably the most beautiful threesome out of the three threesome I've had. It was also actually weirdly her first threesome, so she was kind of taken back by it, how we were, how we were with her. But I will tell you one of the more beautiful moments in that was, you know, he's very incredibly. control. Like he will, like he's going to maneuver the women around. At that point, everything was open game. He could kiss her. I just, I like watching. I've learned that. It was like a gift.

Like, here's my gift to you. Like, I love watching him fuck somebody. That's so wrong. I don't know. Is it wrong? I don't know. Well, you said, I think in your email he said you thought you were a cuck queen, maybe. Well, he calls me that sometimes. And so, Nixie, you know, he's, you know, He, you know, we're giving him a blowjob together, which is real sight for him. And before you know it, he kind of tells me to put me on top of her, lifts me up, and he goes through the, you know, the butt action. And she realizes this, and she just holds me through it. And it was, I mean, it was, like, really incredible.

Like, that's something I will never forget. Just the intensity of us three, it was so fluid, it was beautiful. You know, she leaves and, you know, we've knocked off another one off of our list. But he still, there was some distraction, I felt. Things seemed a little off and kind of puts us more on occurrence. And I would joke around with him because of traveling, like, I would say, well, you know what? If you're traveling, you go do something, just make sure you're safe. Because I will tell you now, him and I do not use condoms.

I do test regularly, but him and I do not use condoms unless we're doing something. math play. And he's like, oh, yeah. And it really wouldn't even bug me. Like, okay, you go, you know, you go to you. And I'd always told them that, that if I can't, if there's something I can't do, if I'm not meeting your needs, you're free to go do whatever. The only problem with that is you say that early on, and then as time goes on, you know, sometimes things change. But I felt like something was off. And I know he's still, he's still a very good friend with his ex-sub who's now married. I didn't know if he was talking to her.

I could see on the app we were using like he was talking to somebody else. And, you know, I didn't really say anything, but I was sort of because of his work schedule, kind of fighting for his attention. And, you know, I end up meeting this other girl and she wants to play with us. I don't think I was really attracted to her, but I'm trying to make this work for us, which I'll never do again. and we end up having a threesome with her, and I get too drunk and become a shit show.

I make it through it, but he decides on this night, it's like he was trying to kind of get me jealous a little bit at the start, and then he ties me up, which I did not like with, and then, you know, he's sucking her, and, you know, she's, you know, he's kind of commanding telling me what to do, but I'm strapped down to the bed. and when it was all over, I pass out, and then I guess I wake up and they touch me before I get sick.

And I think I just got nervous about that night and had not eaten. It wasn't like I was like pounding, pounding drinks, but the drinks were strong and I just wasn't paying as close attention, and I get really drunk. And then they get in a fight who's taking care of me, and he's like, you really tells her to leave. But the next morning, you know, I'm all cleaned up. going to play again and and for the, I mean, this guy can just, I mean, he can get it up. He can, I mean, he just couldn't. He said, well, I had a lot of sex off line. I'm thinking, well, I just thought one time, but okay. But he played, well, I was passed out. He played with

her. Okay, that's fine. Whatever. But when we were getting up, one of the things that happened was is I had a toy and he'd used the toy on her and the toy was clean, but then somebody put it in me. and I was like, that's not cool. And now he's worried. And he had actually penetrated her without a condom, but then stopped and then put the condom on. So there was worry there about what now occurred, because we really didn't know this girl. And next thing you know, I made a kind of a comment, and he says, well, you act like I'm fucking all these people. It's only been one other person the whole year.

And I stopped because he had represented. to me that he was not seeing anybody else. If he had told me from the beginning that he, I mean, or never represented one, I don't know if it would have been as big a deal. Can I just ask you a question? Because it seems like the first half of this podcast, we were talking about you as like a married couple, and then all of a sudden it took off on this guy.

And like, what the fuck's happening with your husband? Like, it just sounds like a totally different life and a totally different story. Like, I mean, what do you, what's going on with your husband at this point? Because we're going to wrap it up in five minutes. But what's going on with your husband? Does he know about all this shit going down with this guy? I mean, it just sounds like you've got this whole relationship with this guy. I do.

I do. He knows this. And he's had to watch it. My husband, we almost love like two single people. To the few people that know us, we really almost represent ourselves. We don't really have sex anymore. we have for years, slept in separate bedrooms.

He, when I was in Houston, I mean, he kind of lives his own life. I kind of live my own life. I don't know if the relationship pulled us away more so, but it was already going in that direction. We're kind of like life partners.

We've committed. We're not getting divorced out of a grandchild. But, I mean, he has recently picked up on that there might be some real deep emotions, but it's like he doesn't really care. Does he have a girlfriend that you know of? Oh, I know.

Yeah. He, yes and no. I mean, he's more of a sugar daddy type. He, I mean, he's more of a sugar daddy type. So he plays with several, usually pays them. He had one for about a year and a half that he saw. And then she's kind of gotten bored of him now. He's chasing another one.

I will know about the thing. But in the beginning when we started this, we were much more open talking. but my husband went down Don't Asked Hotel And so that's kind of where we went And then I got involved In this by chance And it is a big love affair

Right so now you're in love with this guy And you're starting to get jealous that he's with other people Now I'm not jealous that he fucks other people It doesn't think What occurred What occurred in the And I'll try to wrap it up in the five minutes What has occurred is that

He admitted that there was someone else But he was going to talk to me about it in person When we sat down and talked to him, I thought he was going to tell me that he went to go, he was going to be a cuck for his ex, whatever, or he had a one night, whatever, or whatever. Nothing could have prepared me for what he said. And basically what he said was that in January 2020, he started talking to a woman who lives in another state. And she's all BDSM. And I'm like, okay. And he said that I was talking to you at the same time, but you're here.

And the relationships just kind of went and that I continued to talk to her for a whole year and I said, well, so you made her a step. And he said, well, she came in January. So after they spoke for a whole year online, she's of a very religious background. She's younger. And he, him and her started a D.S. relationship. And she has flown into our state twice. and he had admitted to me that she sends him these mailing pictures and that has been the issue for me

that every morning I send this matter of fact the nailing pictures are very I'm more artistic and I even made him a book of them for his birthday of all these nailing pictures but he has been I just if he would have told me in the beginning I've had other guys say they were involved with other women in the beginning I would have been cool. That's fine. I don't know if I would emotionally

went down the rabbit hole with him, but he has started this other relationship, and it is ongoing, and I'm not going to tell him that it's on him. I cannot. It's hard because now, for the first time in many years, a little bit of the green monsters coming out, and I'm having a hard time with... Right. So, but you love, because you care about him, but he's not going to leave his wife. Is he? I mean, would... No, I would not. I would not.

And matter of fact, matter of fact, it's me sometimes because they've had some trouble and they've not been married like I have and I will tell him. I actually usually take his wife's side and I'll calm him down. So I'm not going to interfere in that. And that was the thing. I said, you enter. I said, other women aren't like me. They will try to sabotage you. I know the one, the last sub wanted to marry him.

And so that's, I'm never getting divorced. I do not believe he's going to get divorced, nor do I want to do that. I think she's happier in our own little arena for the most part, but now he has this other woman. And, I mean, him and I just went on vacation together for about five days. It was like a work trip, but it was in a vacation spot. We decided not to talk about it, but the subject says come up again. And I'm not going to, you know, I'm just, I'm trying to come up with compersion. I'm trying to, I mean, it's hot.

hard. It's hard. It's hard to deal with the other woman, even though, I mean, can't you look at it? Like, I thought you were like a cuck queen and you've seen him fuck other girls. Like, is it the fact that, you know, she's doing the same things that you're doing? I mean, you do know he has a wife, so is it because she's another mistress and you are and you want to be the only one? No, I think what it really boils down to, it's really compartmental. His wife and him don't have that kind of, they don't have that type of relationship.

relationship. And that's in one spot. I'm, what he's now come back to me and said, see, here's the other thing. Like, I'm still not like, what do you came back? I guess she likes to be flogged and stuff. And I said, but you tell me like you were in a situation where someone really wanted you to hit them and you couldn't do it. And he said, and he said, well, this is what he told me. He said, as a dom, I do what each woman need. So apparently this woman wants to be flogged. He said, you don't want. that you know you don't want that you're not even like that you know and and what's also happened is that so where I thought that was my role if somebody told you that was your role for a year and now they're coming back and saying well you're really you're more my girlfriend

you know it's like a head fits okay what am I am I and and then him saying well no I I want it to keep it just the way it is I want the pictures I want this I want that and I'm like well if she wants to be your sub then she can go do that So, I mean, I know I'm not being fair, and that's where I'm trying to work through it. Yeah, well, where are you guys stand now? You just got out of this girl. But he's keeping it a secret, and that's the next conversation I'm going to have with him. Like, why don't we just divulge what this is?

It's not a secret anymore. But it's not a secret, but the role that they have for the intensity or what it is, is still kind of a secret. I think it's better that he didn't tell you, because you obviously, wouldn't want to know. Maybe so. You don't want to know. I mean, it bothers you, which I get.

You know what I mean? It's hard to, you're so involved with him. You have no relationship with your husband. You're totally in with this guy who's, you know, never going to be anything more than what you have. It's better that he kept that a secret. It would have been better for you to never have known. And what does it matter if he's doing that?

You know what I mean? It doesn't really matter at the end of the day. If you're not really going to ever marry him or leave your husband for him, you know, you have your thing. so you know it's it's better like for you not to know so I I think it was smart of him not I don't know it wasn't good for you to find out kind of ruin things I don't think it

it kind of have yeah and that's the problem but I mean like you you know you have it set up where you have this guy and you're entangled in this situation it's kind of like a relationship but I think that you know you're at a place where the the relationship changed and you're looking at it as something more. You have a very intense connection with him, but you should probably try to come to some terms with the fact that this other woman exists and be okay with it and maybe go to like a don't ask,

don't tell kind of scenario. You don't need to know about her. What does it fucking matter? I just need to get there. I do sometimes I do better that when I process things and when I think things are like, when I, like once I knew, like it didn't bug me when he said, had had had would been with someone for year i was okay you disclosed that no deal i guess my thing is that it's really the emotional element like if he's having an emotional if you're having an

emotion if he's just fucking somebody or he's doing you know he's no flog her ass i don't give a shit you know if he's all doing that but if you're having the same kind of emotional element and doing the thing then that i think that's what bothers me but it shouldn't because you're right i'm it doesn't it doesn't matter that it shouldn't it does right and that's a problem And that's the dangerous, that's sort of the consequence that comes with this kind of a situation. You've crossed a line where you feel like you own him emotionally, but I think what you should work on is trying to create some sort of boundary that way. I think it's hard once you cross that line to go back. I think it is.

Once you, I mean, once you, I mean, I can't stop loving him. Or, I mean, he tells me he loves me more than. No, you got to just let him, you know, tell him that you don't want to fucking know. Tell them to go back to being a good liar. You know what I mean? That would be better for you. You know, don't tell. Yeah.

Fucking keep it to yourself. Yeah. Well, that's a good advice because I was right on the verge of saying, okay, you need to sit down and tell me everything was going on. And I've been toying with that back and forth. No, you don't need to know unless it turns you on. Why don't you like make it a cuck queen scenario? Why don't you get involved?

Why don't you fuck her too? I mean, it could. That's what I'm saying. Like he is kind of like, since he really now, turn this into a physical situation, a lot of our stuff has kind of slowed down. It's like now I think because he's so, I love you, I love you, I love you. It's like he's kind of pulled me out of the sub thing, if that makes any sense. I guess so let her take that role and you take the other role and why don't you like get

involved in them sexually. I don't know, but you have to keep me posted because like you're at a point where it's like complicated. Like I get it. like you're not supposed to like him, but you do. And it's all fantastic. Yeah, but it's a reality and it bothers you and you're dealing with that. But keep me posting on what happens.

I think somehow you have to turn it around. I think you should turn it into a cuck coin situation. I think you should use it to your advantage. I think you should get fucking turned on by it and maybe get involved with that girl and, you know, or leave the guy. But, you know, let me know what actually does happen and how you resolve it because I'm curious and we'll put on my Patreon. And please.

That's the direction I need to push. Yes, you need to. And send me pictures. Send me anonymous. I'm going to make them anonymous. Send me pictures for my pageant. I'm going to air this. So, okay, so if I email you, if I email you the pictures, then you will fix them

that they're anonymous. Yeah, I will never make anyone anonymous on my show. I mean, no one, I never out anybody on my show. That's the whole theme. So, yeah, you will be anonymous on you. I will cut out your face. I'll black out your face. I'll chop off your head.

I'll do whatever I have to do to make it anonymous. So if people want to see pictures of you, I'm going to send them over there. Send them to me. I'm going to air this this week. I'm an unusual 55-year-old. I'm an unusual looking 55-year-old. Okay, that's good. So everyone, you want to see an unusual 55-year-old,

which I'm assuming means that you look fucking good for 55. Says, go to my Patreon and sign up. Thank you so much. What did we call you again? What's your name? Angel. That's what he calls me. He only calls me.

He says I look like an angel. Okay, so if you want to see Angel, go to my Patreon. But thank you, Angel. Thank you so much for calling it. Sorry I had to cut it short when he feels like you need advice. but you're going to be fine and we'll do an update on you three months from now. So keep me posted. Okay.

Thanks for calling in. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in

paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order. it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang-being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person, and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like Penthouse. letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of

vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format, and finally, the audio book is available coming out August 25th. But you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint. Okay, there's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other, and that's what you get to do there. You can post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of

channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook or the paperback. Send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com.

And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in.