Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 1312 - Body Confidence Both In and Out off the Bedroom

Starting point is 00:00:00 But I am going to tell you real quick that this is a Q&A that I had with Luna from Sex Stories Podcast. She got a bunch of questions. We answered them. We did a bunch of them. I'm breaking them up into smaller episodes because this is Sunday Quick Hit bonus app. This is the last question with Luna.

Starting point is 00:00:17 We talk all about body image in the bedroom. Okay. Now, listen, these were just fun bonus episodes that I was thrown out for the month of December. I am planning to do a Q&A bonus episode every Sunday in 2020. I'll probably do it alone because it's hard to coordinate always with somebody. I'm sure I'll have guests on, but I'm probably going to do most of them alone. So if you have basic questions that you want answered, send them to me.

Starting point is 00:00:50 Strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. These episodes will be short like 20 minutes, so send a general question you want answer, nothing real specific, something that you think would be interesting for others to hear, send it again, like I said, to my email, strictly anonymous podcast at jubel.com. But anyway, and I'm going to get right to this last Q&A part with Luna. Okay, I have one more. This one says, my body image took a hit after a recent health issue. And now I dread being fully naked with someone new. What are some ways to rebuild sensual confidence when I don't believe compliments

Starting point is 00:01:28 yet see. Oof. Well, you want me start? You start. You might not. She's not going to like it. Well, okay, you know, listen, self-esteem and guys don't understand this, and even some women don't understand this, but this is very much for women.

Starting point is 00:01:43 You know, self-esteem is called self-esteem because it comes from yourself. So no matter what anybody says to you, if you don't feel good about yourself, it's not going to change your mind. Like, even if you look fucking killer, if you don't feel it, your guy could tell you till he's blue in the face that you look great and you hear it all the time these poor guys saying like I love my wife she thinks she's fat I feel love her curves she's so hot to me I tell her all the time but it doesn't matter she doesn't want to fuck with the lights on you know what I mean it's because she doesn't feel good about herself and until you do that's just going to be it's like it's a

Starting point is 00:02:14 self-esteem because it comes from yourself you need to get it from yourself so to me what I would say is there are ways to get comfortable in your body that you have and then there's also ways to take the body that you have that took a fucking knock from what you went through. And we've all been there. You can't go to the gym. You weren't eating right. You were on medication. You gained weight, whatever. And you could just turn that around by like getting like really healthy. And the great thing about working out and eating healthy and getting on a, I don't even like to call it a diet, but just living in a healthy way and stuff is you see results. It doesn't just make you feel good. It makes you look good too. Get a gym membership. Get a trainer. In six months, you're going to look fucking killer.

Starting point is 00:02:53 And that's going to change your brain, you know? Or, you know, what I've heard from women that felt really not right about their bodies, you know what, helped them? They went to a swinger club alone, started walking around naked, put themselves out there, did the most scariest thing and eventually felt like amazing about themselves and completely made them feel okay with exactly who they were. Like those are the two options. So either except where you're at now and you have to do that by like, you're taking your

Starting point is 00:03:20 clothes off and just like keep going there, you know what I mean? and then eventually you'll feel okay. Or getting your old body back by like, you know, listen, you could go get some work. Like go to get some plastics. There's so many things you could do nowadays to look better and feel better. And I'm all for those things because I think that feeling good about yourself and having good self-esteem, especially as women, it's like, it's like fucking game changer. So I believe in doing whatever you need to do to get back in shape and get your old body back. and it's only going to make you healthier,

Starting point is 00:03:55 and then you're going to feel better about yourself. And it doesn't take long. I fully agree that relying on other people's compliments to feel good is a slippery, scary slope. And I really believe in meeting our own needs. And I really, really, really love for people to spend time with their bodies. So much of our world is we're in our minds, we're checked out, we're on screens, we're moving so fast.

Starting point is 00:04:22 We're not even sitting with our body. And so I would say, do you have a somatic practice? Can you play a song and touch your body by yourself in front of a mirror and love it? Like what sort of self-love will work for you? Can you create a sensual experience for a bubble buff? Can you do, you know, in addition, because like, yes and like work out if that's right for you. You know, I was raised by a family that was like never have surgery unless you absolutely have to. So like, but if that's, you know, yeah, that's a.

Starting point is 00:04:48 And so, you know, depending on what your needs are and what your desires are, do what makes you feel good. And I really feel like, yeah, that going to see other naked bodies, going to the spa, doing things that help you feel good in your body and just giving love. The other thing is I've had many clients of both genders come to me and be like, I don't know, I want to be with you, but I don't know. I don't feel good about my body. And so what I say to them is like, well, can you trust that I love the sensation of a body and want to make yours feel good? And I can do that regardless of how it feels. can you let go of that fear enough for us to engage that way?

Starting point is 00:05:25 I had someone just last week who had a scar and he was going to put his shirt all the way back on after his shower and I was like, why are you doing the shirt? I was like, I like naked. What are you doing? And he's like, oh, I don't, I have this scar. And I was like, can I touch it? I love it. And when he saw me accept it, he's like, oh, you don't mind?

Starting point is 00:05:43 Oh, then I'll be naked. Yeah, that's great. And so it's also about choosing partners who will support you, not making them responsible for how you feel about yourself. That's the difference there. But coming from a place of within, can I meet my own need to feel beautiful? Can I let myself feel good in my body? And sometimes it's baby steps and sometimes people take leaps in one, you know. And also I've had people do photo shoots with me. Like this was, especially before the ranch, this was my huge bread and butter is like a sexy photo shoot where you feel good, in or out of clothes, you know, with a sheet on, just feeling sensual from the inside

Starting point is 00:06:18 out feeling that beauty in a physical embodied way, finding music that makes you feel good, dancing around until you feel good, and being in spaces of people who have good relationships with their body. I know that, you know, I know that I have some friends who are in groups of friends where it's hypercritical and then when they hang out with me, it's a different scenario. So find what feels most loving and gentle to you and allow yourself to be where you are. I know that when I can accept the things I can't change, then I feel more empowered to work on the things that are in my control. Yeah, and last thing I'm going to say,

Starting point is 00:06:53 and this is why I love my booty calls, because, like, at the end of the day, women are so much more critical about our bodies than guys are, okay? Like, whenever I had, like, a flaw, like, this is what I love my booty call guys for. I'd be like, oh, my God, do you notice, like, these little wrinkles on my legs?

Starting point is 00:07:08 Like, when I bow and they'd be like, what are you talking about? You know what I mean? Like, and it always, like, one time I thought, do I have beef curtains? I don't know what pussies look like. Like, I was going to be, like, put myself on ratemypussy.com,

Starting point is 00:07:17 because I'm like, I don't even know. Like, what are, you know? And so I would always, like, ask my guys. And I just think sometimes, like, women, we're just overly. Now, I'm not saying my advice is not like, go ask a guy. But, like, we're way more critical about our bodies than guys. Our guys don't give a fuck about cellulite. There's not one guy that's going to, like, take a girl's clothes off that has, like,

Starting point is 00:07:38 a big ass and a tiny waist and big tits and she's got cellulate all over legs. He's not going to be like, oh, I can't fuck her. She has cellular. He could care less. He is hot for the shape of the body. He doesn't care. We care about those things. So you have to know that all this little stuff.

Starting point is 00:07:55 Because I'm hypercritical on myself, like the littlest changes that happen, I notice them. But nobody else does. And you have to remember that too. You know, most likely you're not as bad as, like somebody else who doesn't know how you were before would probably be totally into it. Go on to my Discord. Okay. Like people like, I did a pussy pick contest. guys submitted 80,000 picks of pussies and I was like, oh my God, I would have sent that

Starting point is 00:08:20 picture of my pussy and millions of people liked it. Like, guys like, just guys love checks. Like they don't care about anything. Like seriously, there's so much more forgiving than we think. Okay. So if that's what you're worried about, trust me. You don't have to be perfect. No guys looking for perfect. No guys looking to see if you have rolls on your stomach when he's fucking you. No, but, you know, like those are the things I'd ask my guys. Like, do you noticed that? Like, is that? They're like,

Starting point is 00:08:46 no, what are you kidding? Like, no, what are you kidding? Like, they don't care. I totally agree that most people are way harsher on themselves than they are on other people. And if someone is that hypercritical about someone else, especially if they care

Starting point is 00:09:03 about, then they need to go to therapy and work on their shit. Because that usually means that they were raised by hypercritical parents. And so they attack other people because they're worried that they are troubled. I'm sorry. If I had a girlfriend and she came to me and said, oh my guy like saw cellulite on my legs and he wouldn't fuck me I'd be like I don't think he's straight like I don't know one straight guy that would give a shit about that that's like some sort of mental problem and maybe he has an issue with sex and closeness or something because I know for a fact it will never like you know it's the same thing like if a guy can't get hard for you 99.9% of the time is not that anything's wrong with you it's like something going on in their own head so I'm sorry no straight man is going to be like horrified by the things that you think at the end of the day.

Starting point is 00:09:48 Most of the time they know what you're working with with your clothes on it. How much worse is it going to be? Like, unless you have like some, a tail coming out somewhere that's like, you know, guys are fine. They're fine. They're happy. If someone came to me and was like,

Starting point is 00:10:03 hey, I'm into you. You be like so hot. Let me see. Show me now. Please guys. I love talking to the not the norm girl. I'd be like,

Starting point is 00:10:15 get the fuck out of here. You'd be like, fuck me with that tail. Fuck me with that tail. I was literally the next thing I was going to say, does it always stay faucet or can we wrap it around something? There's a show called The Boys. There's a show called The Boys. And then they have a spinoff called Jen V.

Starting point is 00:10:32 And it's so good. And they have like all these superheroes with these really crazy things like tails. And then they fuck them on pubic hair that kills people and guys that have people coming out of their assholes and tails that fuck people and dicks that are so long. they strangle people. I mean, I am always like, I would love to be in the writer's room. Like, who are these people

Starting point is 00:10:51 that created this show? How is this the first time I'm hearing about this? These guys, they live in L.A., this is your future husband, okay? The guys that have come up with this shit. My future group husband and wife, pod. Yes, because let me tell you, they are straight into it.

Starting point is 00:11:04 They have the craziest shit that goes down in this show. And they have, like, these extras. And I watch it because I'm always like, I want to see who has this brain that thought this. And they're super interesting. And they live in L.A. And you need to date them because they're so up your alley. They think of the craziest shit and has to do with like kind of sex and appendages

Starting point is 00:11:21 and stuff. And I was like, oh my God, where do that? Like, are they smoking weed to come up with us? But I don't think so. I don't know. They're just super creative and crazy. Some of us just have brains that go wild with fantasy. Wait, because like, you know how one of my one of my main fantasy themes is like lining stuff up and trying all of it? You know, because I want to experience everything. So now I'm like, I'm like, now can I, are you saying, Kathy, that I should write them a nice, convincing, so that they each take me on some dates and then I think you need to I think you need to like subtly stop them I used to stop like if I if I made a mark like I would mark my guys okay I knew every one of my next guys before they knew they were my next guys and I would get them okay

Starting point is 00:12:02 and it was straight out of like stalker central once my guy from the gym once I had my girlfriend I was like listen this is what we're going to do we're going to go to the gym it was like gym from the gym and I didn't know how old he was and he looked kind of young and I told my friend this is what we're going to do going to go to the gym. You're going to tell me how old you think. Now, if you think he's like 25 or under, you're not going to do anything. But if you think he's older, I'm going to have you follow him home so I could figure out where he lives so I can like walk past his house all the time, you know, because I live in New York City. So we get to the gym. She's like, Kathy, he's 25. I'm like, no, he's not. There's no way he's 25. He's like 35. I need you to follow him. So it didn't even

Starting point is 00:12:35 work, right? So she follows him to the gym and she follows him home from the gym. And she as she texts me, he went into the tanning song. So I never got to know where he lived. And then I wound up like eventually talk because like when I stalk someone like I'm going to talk to that fucking guy at the gym and I'm going to get him and I got him and I did tell him by the way I said by the way I like had I had cutney follow you home from the gym and I like his I really was hot for you and and he was so complimented he thought it was great you know so yeah you got to make your mark and this is honest stocking yeah totally he was complimented you this is you got to make your mark you got to like follow them you got to start watching the show you got to watch the extra see if you

Starting point is 00:13:15 think that they're hot and then start following them on Instagram and then hope that they listen to your show and then DM them or something, you know, you got to go after what you want. I mean, I've learned, though, that guys are the pickers. Nobody that I ever stalked and got ever, like, wound up to be anything more than just, you know, fun. But I think I need to wind up with the guy that stalks me. Not me, like making my mark. Well, okay, I was going to say, I was going to say, how would you feel?

Starting point is 00:13:42 I want to be very clear, I'm not condoning stalking here. And also, Kathy, you know how all the time when we talk, you're like, Like, my stories are not that interesting. This is such a clear example of how your stories are so interesting. That's always more. This is why I date weed heads. Yeah, yeah, there's always more. But yeah, so you could get that guy.

Starting point is 00:13:59 You just got to go check it. No, I want to be in the writer's room. I'm like, I bet I think of things they don't even think of. You know, because that's what I think about all the time. You are literally from the same, like, you know, if there are breeds of dogs, like you guys are the same breed of dog, like the guy. So I was going to say, I can't date them. they might be my like long lost siblings I didn't know I thought or something.

Starting point is 00:14:21 They're aliens. They're aliens just like, yeah. Watch the show. It's so good. I really love it. Actually, I started watching it with my son. And then I was like, get the fuck out of the room. Like all of a sudden it started to get so sexual and so crazy and so good that I followed it because I love it.

Starting point is 00:14:33 And then they had a spin off Gen Z, I think, or Gen V. You should watch. Yeah, Gen V. It's really good. You'll like it. And they have the craziest sex stuff as superpowers that are like literally like. like literally like pussy hair that kills people, dicks that strangle people, a guy that has people coming out of his asshole, like just to create like the funniest shit you've ever

Starting point is 00:14:55 seen. Like the most, it's very interesting. So anyway, I don't know how we got on to that. I'm so glad you said all of that. Because to cut to bring it full circle with the body image stuff, what you're telling reminds me exactly of my like long time back burner project, the wiggle power where I don't, do you remember I wiggled every single day for a thousand days? Like it and I stopped because I went to the brothel and there was no service. And I couldn't like wiggle everyday life. And also I was. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:15:21 And then I didn't want to like show people where I was because I wasn't, you know, I was like, I don't know if I'm going to like this. Let's see. But that was that was so that we could love all of ourselves, even the wiggly parts. And there's a whole thing, like a whole thing that goes along with it. But we'd get superpowers once we embrace our wiggly parts. And I have since learned that like shaking and wiggling is actually a form of like animal trauma healing. Like they do it in the wild because so many people sent me articles about it.

Starting point is 00:15:45 And then I'm taking this somatic tantra, et cetera, like super duper class right now. And so we're learning all about healing, trauma healing, all these different modalities of somatic experience. And like, literally one of the cathartic tools is shaking and wiggling. So I'm like, ah, some part of me knew what I needed. And I still do wiggle every day. Yeah, you're good like that. I'm too, I'm too excited for stuff like that.

Starting point is 00:16:08 Like when I hear you talking about, I'm like, oh, I can never. But I know that it's obviously. Yeah, but I know that it's like obviously. it would work, right? And it is the thing. But like, I don't know that I could ever go there. But I know that I could understand why it would work and how it would work. And that's my issue.

Starting point is 00:16:26 Like I'm a little, I don't know, tight, shy, not able to allow myself to let go. It's controlling. You know, I don't know what the word is, but I have that problem that I can't wiggle. Not going to wiggle. Yeah. I mean, I think it's very funny. Or even just like watching the lips do that on screens. It makes me laugh so much.

Starting point is 00:16:44 And when I have someone who's very playful, like a lover who's very playful, sometimes I get overcome with a desire to give you either call it a bellyberry or raspberry depending where you're from. But like, I love that. Well, I'm going to send you a really fucking funny video that makes me laugh every time when I'm in a bad mood. And it's these guys singing with their tongues. It's like some sort of Irish tongue song thing that they do. And everyone's mouth and tongue movement as it pans through the guys. It's like this old video.

Starting point is 00:17:10 I got to send it. It's like a TikTok or Instagram thing. And they're literally making. They're literally singing with their tongues flicking. You've got to read the comments because the comments are all about oral sex and the memes and everything are fucking hilarious. But it's literally a line of like a hundred guys singing like a cappella with their tongue. A line? Everyone's mouth just gets funnier and funnier.

Starting point is 00:17:30 It's the weirdest thing you've ever seen. And it's the most interesting thing you've ever seen. And I just whenever I want a good laugh, I watch it. You're going to love it. Can you understand how my brain that loves to think about lining stuff up and fantasizing with it is now thinking about a line of flicking tongues? Like, do you know what I just want to crawl across those mouths? I'm like, could they all sing into my pussy? Do you think they could keep seeing their song?

Starting point is 00:17:51 You could just go down the line. There's like a hundred of them and they're taking it very seriously and they're dressed up in like an outfit and they're in front of an audience and they're doing this Irish tongue song or something. I don't know. It's like something. It's the craziest thing you've ever seen. You're going to die.

Starting point is 00:18:04 And it's real. You'll love it though. I'm going to send it to you. Well, how was that for you? Kathy? I feel like answering questions together is very fun. I'm like answering questions. It's fun.

Starting point is 00:18:13 I like all your questions. but you have to bring all the questions. I had boring questions that I brought to the table. I liked your questions. Well, people will write us more interesting questions. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got to take more time to get some questions. I mean, I have a lot of thoughtful ones. Now that people will hear this episode, you know, I'm going to say for my listeners, right, if you want to send in a question for me and YO2 answer, DM me on Instagram or email me strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com and then while you tell your audience how to get in touch with you. I love messages through sex stories podcast. com.

Starting point is 00:18:44 That's my favorite. That is the podcast. We're just going to keep that name in spite of censorship for now. Sex Stories Podcast.com. And you can also share a voice memo if you want. So either way, we can use your voice. But I like written messages. A lot of people are shy, but I'm into voice moments.

Starting point is 00:18:59 All right. Well, this was fun. Awesome. I think I called you your other name of 10 times. But this was super fun. That's okay. All the names are welcome as long as I don't get called Karen. That's the only name that I'm like, please just don't call me that.

Starting point is 00:19:11 That's not my name. Awesome. All right. Well, thanks for having all the questions and I'll bring some next time. And let's definitely do it again because this was super fun and interesting. Oh, so much fun. Definitely, let's do it again. All right.

Starting point is 00:19:22 Talk soon. Okay, that was the last part of mine in Luna's Convo. I will have other bonus episodes probably up the rest of this month. And then in 2006, I'll be doing some new Q&A's or something different on Sunday. So stay tuned. Thanks so much for tuning in. Okay, I just wanted to tell you. tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly anonymous confession, Secret Sex Lives of

Starting point is 00:19:48 Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen. There's a cook queen. story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person, and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like Penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that

Starting point is 00:20:37 kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short. chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format, and finally, the audiobook is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint. Okay, there's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link. from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and

Starting point is 00:21:23 videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my discord. It's private like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook, or the paperback. Send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous podcast. Did you come here looking to hear some super hot stories. Well, then I know where you can tune in and read a ton more hot stories, and that is in my book.

Starting point is 00:22:26 Strictly anonymous confession, secret sex lives of total strangers. It's finally out. It's available anywhere where you buy books. The links will be in the description. The book contains 17 stories, sort of like the best of from every category I have on my show. There's a hot wife. There's a cut wife. There's a cut. There's a bull. There's a bunch of swingers. There's a gang bang girl. There's a gilf porn star. There's a girl that fucked her best friend's mom from high school. All those stories are in the book and they're all true. Think Penhouse Forum meets my show. That's the vibe of the book. It's available anywhere where you find books. The link is in the description. And for this week only, I am giving anyone who buys my book complimentary access to my private Discord, which is super fun. It's a not safe for work site. It's a place where people get to post their own picks and videos. People are hooking up over there. We have naughty contest. It's super fun. The only way you get in is through me. If you purchase the book, send me a pick of your

Starting point is 00:23:32 screenshot. Email it to me. It's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I'll send you a private link to my Discord. So if you want to buy the book, just go to the description and click on the link.

Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 1312 - Body Confidence Both In and Out off the Bedroom

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