Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 1349 - Chris Came out as Bi to his Wife and Now they Have an Open Marriage

Episode Date: January 27, 2026

Chris came out as bi to his wife and now they have an open marriage and he called in to talk all about it. Tune in to hear all the details including how he was raised and what happened to him when he was younger and how it all made him hide his interest in guys as well as his interest in sex in general, how and why he wound up cheating and why he decided to tell his wife everything including him being bi, how his wife felt about it, how he eventually copped to also being into hotwifing and how that led to her first experience, their first trip to an adult resort and the black guy she met on the beach and hooked up with and the playroom hook-ups they took part inn, the Bi-week at the resort they went to and why his wife didn’t engage while he hooked up with guys, the stigma around guy on guy action and how his wife eventually came around to accepting it and ow that coincided with him accepting it in himself plus a whole lot more.  GET A COPY OF THE STRICTLY ANONYMOUS BOOK! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY HERE: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To see HOT pics my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! To join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712   Want to be on the show? Email me at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[e-mail]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Be on the Show." Want to confess while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. All voices are changed.   Sponsors: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bluechew.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ — Get 10% OFF your first month of Bluechew GOLD! Use code: STRICTLYANON⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://learn.nocd.com/strictly⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started ⁠⁠⁠https://butterwellness.com⁠⁠⁠ Get the BUtter massager and get 20% off your whole order ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.quince.com/strictlyanon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ — For premium quality Quince clothing plus FREE shipping and 365 day returns ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://vb.health⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ — To get 10% off DRIVE BOOST by VB Health use code: STRICTLY ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠PikaVibe.com/Strictly⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ — Click to get $15 OFF your purchase ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://beducate.me/pd2540-anonymous⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠— Click here to take the quiz and  get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness Follow me! Instagram  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ X  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Website  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Everything else: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You can be on the show. All you got to do is email me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com or go to my website, strictly anonymouspodcast.com and just click on Be on the Show. Now listen, if you have a naughty confession that you want to leave, you could leave it on my confessions hotline. The number 347-4-203579. That's 347-4-40-3579. You could call that number 24-7.

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The last thing I'm going to tell you about is SDC.SDC.com is like the world's largest adult online dating site. And what's great about SDC is it's only good to go on there and meet other couples. It's a great place to find out about all the events and the clubs and the parties going down in your neighborhood or wherever you're traveling. Now, listen, I could give you a free trial to SDC. All you got to do is use my code 37712. That's 37712. Or just go to the the description and click on the link. Okay, today I have on Chris. Chris has a super interesting story. He's a great talker. I could have not said one fucking word on this call because he just wanted to tell the story. He's got an interesting story. He's a by guy. He finally confessed everything to his wife and him and his wife are open now

and doing all kinds of things, but there is like no smooth path to the end of the story, which I just told you. You know, there was infidelity in their marriage. There was a lot of abuse and stuff that happened to him when he was younger so he wasn't really like okay with who he was sexually you know like I said then the infidelity came up in his marriage and then at some point he decided to come clean and he really came clean to his wife and told her that he was into guys because that was something that he had always realized he was into and from there they he played the long game I mean she wasn't that accepting right from the bat but he explains eventually how she came terms with it and eventually she fucked another guy he started also copping to the fact that he's into hot wiping. She eventually fucked another guy. Then they went to

adult resorts and now they're been in orgies and all kinds of stuff. And eventually his wife is going to be down and eventually soon he's going to live out his fantasy of being with a guy with his wife. So it's one of the stories where they come full circle. His wife came a long way. He came a long way. The story I think is super inspiring because his wife wasn't really accepting of his being by in the beginning and now she is. And so you got to hear the whole story. It's super interesting. So I'm going to get right tuned to be right back on with Chris. Hi, Chris. Welcome to the strictly anonymous podcast. How are you today? I'm great. It's kind of interesting and fun to be talking to you. Awesome. So listen, you have you and your wife opened up in an interesting quote unquote way is what

you said to me. You know, that means you were, I don't know, how long were you married for before you open things up. About 28 years, I think. Oh, okay, great. And how long has it been since you opened things up? Just going on a year now, just about a year. Yeah. Okay, cool.

You're into guys too, right? That's the other thing that you're into. Yes, correct. In my way, which you've heard a lot, yeah. Yeah, and your way meaning like you like to suck a dick, but you don't think you're into guys? Is that like your way? There you go.

Pretty much, pretty much, yeah. I love it. Yeah. It's a very common thing. Yeah, can you believe? Okay, so do you want to go, do you want to start with like the buy stuff and that? Or do you, you know, or should we start with you coming out as being by to your wife? Is that what, like, started you guys opening up to begin with?

I don't know. You tell me. Yeah. So, so are you cool? And again, I know you only have limited time and I don't want to waste your time. Are you cool with me doing just a little bit about how I was raised? Of course. What are you kidding?

I'm like, always get interested in the psychology. if that has something to do with it. Yeah, of course. Yeah, me too. It's fascinating. Okay. So I was raised in, it's quite weird. I was raised Catholic.

My parents were neither one of them were very Catholic, but my mom was extremely anti-sex and extremely anti-men when it came to sex. So by the time I was four years old, my mom was telling me shit about, you know, don't be like men, men are pigs, all the things like. So I get indoctrinated and then they didn't seem to care that much about religion, but they sent us to religious education and there it just got reinforced. So the reason I tell you that is because I started with incredibly sex negative messages, but once I hit 12 or whatever it was, I knew that this was a big deal for me and I was often running.

I mean, I lost my virginity. I think it might have been 13, but I think it was 14. And I literally came to believe, well, this is the reason I'm on earth was to a party, but more important, like be with girls, fuck girls. That was my thing. Yeah, well, maybe because they made it so naughty for you. That's what fucking happens. Sorry to say. Well, absolutely.

And that's part of the psychology. But here's the thing. So I had an incident when I was younger where, you know, whatever you want to call it. Someone abused you. Yeah. Yeah, and I have thoughts about that as well because I think people really get that wrong a lot of times. But it made me really angry at the wrong people because nobody helped me. Nobody gave me counseling, nobody did anything.

And so this thing happened, and I mistook that person for being gay. And so I spent my high school years being kind of not, I'm not a big guy, I'm not a fighter, but just like in my mind, very, very anti-gay. And then when I was about 20, well, was it a man? It was a man. Okay. It was a man.

And it went as far as it did. So when I was about 20, you've probably heard of the penthouse forum. And I came across a letter in there. I've never seen one that was by or gate. Never. Like not once. And it was about a guy who, I'm not going to say what the profession was, but a guy who was in my very unusual profession,

who was a cockshucker. And I immediately responded to it. And I was like, holy shit. I can't know. This is, I know this is true about me, but I can never tell anybody. I can never let anybody know about this. But it was just my awareness. Like, oh, so this is a thing that I have in me.

And then I, here's the reason I bring all that up is because my shame and fear around that fact, and it's just a fact, call it bisexual, whatever you want to call it, It led me to be really weird sexually. I did like the serial monogamous thing. I did not open up completely to any of the girls I was with. I finally had a girlfriend like I was in my late 20s, and I don't even know how we stumbled on it, but we both stumbled on the fact that we were both basically by,

and so we played in fantasy and all that stuff. But when I finally got married, of course, I mean, by this time, you know, I was like, sure, you know, I would read, I like reading. That's why I'm super psyched to read your book. I like reading almost really more than visual porn, which is supposedly not what men are, but I'm a writer. So, so, so, you know, I had this as an interest of mine, and then I met my wife, and I was like, I don't know, mid-30s or, I don't know, I can't remember exactly. And she had a way more interesting sexual resume than I did. She was raised by a kind of a mentally ill, inappropriate mom, but my God.

But when we got to get, I mean, seriously, like here's the model. I was told sex sucks, men suck, don't be like that. She was told by her mom who was truly mentally ill, your body is your, is your coin in life. And I don't give a fuck what you do. And so my wife, you know, she calls herself, oh, yeah, I was a little slut. And that's just what she learned and I learned. So we had fun, we get married. and here's what happened and this is weird.

I, out of shame, because of the messages I think I got, I'm like, oh, God, my sexuality is too much. I'm, you know, I want it too much. So I was the one who restricted for decades. In our marriage, I was just like, look, I'll fuck her once a week. And I love that. I want it every day, but I can't show that I'm that kind of person who loves sex. And so then I would jerk off and do all the stuff. And what she said years later, when I finally started.

coming clean about stuff. She was like, you know, it was weird to me because before we really got married, you know, we, we had such a fun time and it was so great. And then we got married and I just figured you're a once a week got. And that's what she said, but I'm not a once a week guy. I am not, but out of shame, I restricted myself. So basically, over time. That makes sense with the messaging that your mother was giving you. You didn't want to be that guy that your mother told you not to be, the guy that loves sex and wants to fuck all the time. Yep. And so it's a real conflict, not just for a boy, but for a man, where it's like, I love sex. I am bisexual at some level. I'm all these things. I got to hide it. And I just know that nobody else wants to be a part.

Part of my mother's message to me was girls and women, they don't like this shit. They only put up with it because they have to. So I literally had that message. You know what? I actually think that's part of what led me into being molested. I can explain to you if you want, but it was just like, I didn't think girls would ever like me. I didn't. Right. Because, and so here's this person and he comes up, you know, and I, listen, I ended up blowing a whistle on him. Nobody fucking believed me. Nobody helped me.

He's still. Even your mother. But nobody. Nobody helped me. And the guy, you know, finally he gets nailed. And nobody even came and said, hey, man, we're sorry. That just didn't happen. How old are you? How old are you, by the way?

I am 64. Right. So you're just from that generation where our parents just like swept everything under the rug. Like it was just pure denial. No one at that time. Any parent that would have done something with that at the time was like way ahead of their time. Because most parents would have rolled like yours and all the other fucking adults around you. Let's just pretend everything's perfect. Sweep it under the rug and live in denial. That was just very common. Unfortunately. And that's why a bunch of fucked up people on that generation. Right. Yeah, totally. And then, you know, the messages from my father were, look, I'm a different kind of guy. I'm not hairy. I'm not big.

I'm as fit as I've ever been now. Like, seriously, I'll post pictures and stuff. And I've always been adventurous and athletic. But my dad had his own insecurities and he, I was too much for him. And he, you know, he sent the message that I was, you know, a sissy, which I wasn't. I absolutely wasn't. Or, you know, he used to ask me if I was gay all the time. I was like, Jesus Christ.

So I came from that. But so, all right. So my wife and I are together. We're doing these things. I am engaging in fantasy and. That's what I was going to say. I was wondering, like, because if you're sort of holding all the stuff at bay, what are you doing with that energy?

You're like doing stuff on the secretly, on the side, like jerking off furiously? Yep. Yeah, exactly. And it was, it was porn. A lot of us written because I like where I did do chats and things like that, which were, you. you know, they weren't that great. But basically, I was hiding.

And I, you'll relate to this, some bad stuff happened and it's really five or six years ago. Because of me, I have had affairs with women. And I just, I understand, first of all, I think now when I look back, it's like, I've never been naturally monogamous. There's not. Right.

And so I had affairs with women. and one of them ended very badly and my wife, you know, learned of it and all this stuff. And I just got to hit a point and I'm like, listen, I'm just going to, I'm just going to, I'm tired of just like trying to push myself down. It makes me mad. It makes me depressed. It made me an alcoholic. It made you cheat.

It made me cheat. It made me all these things. And I'm not saying it made. I made my choices. But it was just like, I want to be my. self and that's what I did. All right, it's dating confession time. Have you ever been on a perfectly fine date or in a relationship that's actually okay,

but your brain suddenly starts spiraling, you start questioning your feelings, your attraction, or whether you even love your partner anymore. And once those thoughts start, you just can't shut them off. Everybody has unwanted thoughts sometimes, right? But if they're constant, looping, and all-consuming, if you're always actually questioning, whether you love your partner the right way or whether you should leave and find somebody better, you might be dealing with something called relationship OCD. OCD isn't just about being need or organized.

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between sessions so you're never alone. So if you think you might be struggling with relationship OCD, don't wait, visit nocd.com to book a free call with their team. That's N-O-C-D.com or just go to the description and click on the link. Learn of it and all this stuff. And I just got to hit a point and I'm like, listen, I'm just going to, I'm tired of just like trying to push myself down. It makes me mad. It makes me depressed. It made me an alcoholic. It made you cheat. It made me cheat. It made me all these things. And I'm not saying it made.

I made my choices. But it was just like I want to be myself. And that's what I did. And so I came clean to her and really I just said, look, I'm not even asking for anything. I just want you to know that I'm going to turn over a new leaf. I'm going to stop drinking. I want to be honest, rigorously honest. I'm going to tell you, and bisexual, you can ask what that means. You know, please don't assume. And I'm not naturally monogamous. And honestly, you know, I understand. I'm good at communicating.

I've done lots of work and stuff. But, you know, it was hard for her. And we spent a couple years where, honestly, I didn't like my sexuality being under the microscope all the time, but it just was. And so, you know what I did write? And this is something I gave it. In what sense was it under a microscope?

Because she didn't trust you and she had to build a microscope. that back and you have to show her everything of what you were doing full transparency. Well, I'm never going to do that because I believe in privacy. But yeah, she was just anxious and it would come up and then she would, you know, she would make assumptions and just fears and stuff. Well, listen, when somebody fucking cheats on you, it dry, you turn into a psychotic crazy person. That's the, I mean, the fact that she stayed with you is a miracle because that's hard to get past. And when someone does that to you, it's just a, that happens to people. It's because, you know, so you can't, you can't blame her.

And the worst thing is when people are like, oh, like, you know, you got to like, obviously you work through it. So you have to understand on a certain level. She couldn't help being completely distrustful for you because you were distrustful. You know what I mean? You're not, you weren't to be trusted. So I'm going to tell you something that I suspect you won't believe. And I have to be really careful because people do know this.

And not everybody knows about our life. Oh, I can't wait. Tell me. It's, okay, it's complicated, okay? So, yes, I did commit infidelity and was found out, but I, how can I say this? I'm just going to cross my fingers and hope. Yeah. I had been given a hall pass because we had a very extended absence where I.

So why was it cheating? Okay, wait, you cheated before. Because there were two rules. There were rules. Oh, okay, I'm confused. One of the rules is no like emotions, no like relationship, no texting, none of that. I got it. And then number two, I don't ever want to know about it. So I did violate number one because it wasn't really sexual. We tried that and it just didn't work.

And so, but what it was was more emotional. And it didn't last very long. It didn't last very long at all. but you know I did what I thought I was expected to do I didn't tell her and then because I'm an idiot I just didn't hide it or cover my tracks and so so here's the thing I don't excuse because I did violate that rule and it's very important but what I want you to know is like I this was not me just charging around and being a pad and here's the thing that's really important to me and we'll talk about it or we won't I really really don't agree with the way we look at cheating in this society i'm not saying it's good and you're always very careful to say that but like what happened was very complex and different and yet because society sort of supports this notion like oh the wrong spouse whether man or woman you sort of adopt these roles and therapists are into that and i'm like okay but like you remember those people who got caught at the cole play concert

Yeah. Okay. You know what? I was posting on social media people who got out. These people suck. And I said, you know what? We don't have any idea what was going on. We literally have no idea. And I will not condemn them. They made their choices. But like everybody's so quick to just like assume cheater. I don't even like the word cheat. No, no, that's why I have cheating stories on my show because I think nine out of ten, I think there's different variations of cheaters. You have on one very far end of the spectrum, the Lander who'll fuck his wife's best friends when she's in the other room, like the worst kind of fucking garbage cheater. But most cheaters, I'm sorry because I've talked to so many of them, especially also when I used to do my DL calls. Okay, most cheaters aren't that guy. Okay. Same with the women, too. Most people who are cheating are cheating because there are serious issues in their relationship. Needs aren't being met.

Things are happening. Years are gone by. Communication is bad. And listen, not that cheating is the right thing to do, but that's what happens. And that's why I have those stories. Because I think sometimes if you listen to people's stories, maybe you won't judge them. They're like, oh, that guy cheated. He's just a fucking scumbag.

You know what I mean? It's a lot more complex than that. It's not just so black and white. I totally agree. And, you know, I just, the kind of the development I've done with myself, and I guess you could call it, I don't really know. I have practices that I do every day and they're important to me. and they just you know they help me just to not just overreact to stuff and what I'm going to say is

I do think and I get it it's made the controversial but I think we've made such a big deal out of cheating with a capital C and it's such a it's a loaded word come on tell me cheating is a bad you know it's like you could say infidelity but so I just think we overdo it and I think then there's a script and I think people get into it and here's a thing I may be wrong about this but I think when people have that expectation like oh god if I get cheated on I'm going to feel because they see it in the media and they hear it and they read it online they're going to feel that way and what I'm saying is nobody has to feel good about it but I think people can actually come together the feelings are valid I don't think anybody should go up on the cross and confess, and I don't agree with that.

I think, like you say, it's going on with the relationship. And it can be an opportunity, as you know, and you've heard from people. I'm not saying it's a good thing, but it absolutely, I would say sometimes you might almost say it had to happen. Yeah, looking back, of course, looking back five or ten years. Most of the time, people that are cheating, even sometimes it would be very interesting. I'd get emails from guys being like, oh, I'm the biggest. a scumbag I cheat. I just love women. I love variety. And then I get on the phone with them. And when I question them like really hardcore and get into it, it's not just that. They're all,

they didn't feel like liked by their women. They didn't feel wanted. Like it was a lot more than they even thought. They were like sort of even projecting on themselves this whole sort of, oh, I'm just cheating and it's not that deep. But even with men, it is. Most of the time it's about that. And people, and listen, you know, that shit is going to come up in a relationship and when it does most people if they could get through it they wind up on the better side but let's get back to your story so you so the problem you do you did you you never cheated before you got the full the free pass is what you're saying no no no no not true but but but what i did what i did was uh i i i tried some sort of anonymous hookups with men and here's the thing they

were just first you know like I'm I'm I'm because I have this oh let me see I'm traveling let me get a guy to come give me a blow job and then at some point like I knew I knew from way back like you know I kind of want to suck conk I think that'd be interesting so I started trying that I did that a little bit not a lot and you know what it was never I mean okay right it's hot in the moment and if you come you know whatever it's exciting but it wasn't it wasn't good it wasn't what I'm interested in. These are guys like me. They're furtive.

They're afraid. You know, they run away or they're unattractive and, you know, fat. It's just such a not what I was interested in. Now, I'm not really interested in men. I'm just not. But if I'm going to be with a guy, I kind of want to chill dude who's intelligent, who doesn't make a big deal, who's not on a fucking power trip. And, you know, I basically not really had the opportunity to have that.

But because here's the thing, over time, I just let my sexuality loose with my wife. And I started saying like, hey, you know, I wasn't always like this. I was super jealous when I was younger like most men. But it just got to a point where it was hot for me to think about her fucking other guys, right? and and we'd talk about it and and and the key in as you've heard from many other guys i've heard a lot of your shows it's just like you know we started talking about her experiences and she wasn't sure she was you know she thought i would be jealous or mad or this or that and just over time through fantasy and all that stuff i i you know i it wasn't sneaking i just sort of worked a little bit of buy ideas

into things and and then we would talk about it because you know oh maybe she is isn't comfortable or blah, blah, blah, blah. But you know, it was slow. I never ever pushed her. I never asked specifically for anything. I didn't have expectations. I was patient. I never once. Even though it was annoying to me, all those years. She said really shitty things to me, homophobic things. I never lost my cool. And that's not actually who I was. Like, I was a person who could have a temper. But on that, I never did. So that to me is just like, advice to guys like I get it it's exciting and you want it but like I just think patience and keep your fucking cool and don't push don't push too hard. Why did she eventually come around to it?

She did and she did because because she learned that through fantasy and all those kinds of things with okay let's just say with that whatever we want to call hot wifing or whatever that that was exciting to her and her only thing you've heard this before is like well she was afraid like oh how would I be in the instance, like in the reality? So she didn't want to step over that line, but it's just like, I, she went on a trip with her friends. And I told her, I'm like, look, I'm at home. I'm, you know, I can get mad at you or whatever, you know, blah, blah, blah. And there was a person she had known previously and they got together.

And here's the thing. It didn't bother me at all. I thought it was super exciting. They actually saw each other more than once. so I got to hear a little about it and then they went back. And you know, I learned about me. Like, oh, this is a turnout for me and it's not just like a surface thing. I'm cool with it.

I've grown up a lot. Like I feel confident in our marriage and our commitment that I'm not really afraid. Now, of course, something could happen, but if that's the case, we'll find. So it just got there to that point and she tried it once. And it really made a difference for her because she was like, wow, you know, you really, you really do enjoy this. And I, and this is a person that I had known in the past too. And he didn't used to like this person very much.

But she's like, wow, you know, you don't, you don't even like Billy Bob making up the name. But here you are. And I'm like, yeah, I'm different. So from there, you know, we talked more. She, you know, she has some rules. And I respect them. Like I haven't, I haven't gone out behind her back at all, you know, with men or women, you know, for all that time. and one of her rules is she's just like yeah i'm not really ready to kind of do this in our town and at home

and i like to be out i am not afraid anybody knows that i'm by but she's a little worried you know reputation wise and she's come so far with that like she's really fucking awesome and like in bed and fantasy and the bigger thing i guess i should say is like she accepted it all enough and believed in us enough to like say, hey, do you want to like, you know, try to go to an adult vacation place? And I'm like, sure. Hey, guys, let's discuss performance in the bedroom. And let's be real. When it comes to performance is good enough, really good enough. I mean, come on. Don't you want to perform at your best? Well, then that's why you're going to be excited to hear all about bluechew gold. Blue chute gold. Blue chute gold is new and it is amazing. While most blue pills out there, only focus.

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And every single thing that happens, whether it's a misunderstanding or whatever, it's just an opportunity to learn. That is how I do my life. And so we have been now a number of times and it's always got certain amount of ups and downs, but we've learned better like how to do it and to make sure we have a plan and communication and all these things. And it's been really. All right, but get specific. Okay, because you're just painting over the whole picture. You went many times.

We don't know any details. Walk me maybe through like your first experience there and then explain some of the ups and downs you went through and what you guys even did there. Absolutely. So the first time was just really pretty fun. It was just a normal. I will tell you this, maybe you don't know this,

but like most of these kinds of places, and I think this sucks, and I'm guessing you do too, knowing you, they're not okay with like open mail-to-mail contact. And so that's just not on the table. But like, you know, I wish I could remember all the stories, but we just had a really good time. But what was on the table? Are you going to fuck women too? Or is she just fucking guys? Is it just hot wiping that's on the table? Yeah. Basically, but basically that because she's just not sure. But here's what happens. Once she's into it, she's super cool if there are people she likes and men, women, whatever.

So as long as it feels kind of like a situation where it's not going to be out of control or I'm running off or whatever, it's been great. So let me just give you an example, like on the beach, right? We're there and it's nude, you know, you don't wear any clothes. And cool guy walks up black guy that very smart, you know, super cool guy, big guy. And he just sits and we're talking on the beach. I'm having a conversation with him. And he just starts, you know, putting his fingers at our pussy. rubbing her. So she's just over there getting this and he and I are having this conversation.

And she fucking loved that, right? She loves to be the center of attention. And so that was just that thing. And then later, I don't know, the next day or something, that same guy, I'm over on the other side of the pool talking to people and there were women hanging off me and somebody was making out with me. And she was okay with it. Like I always chuck in with her. I would never do anything without asking. And she's like, she calls me from across the pool, so I go over there. And she's like sort of in the water sitting on this guy's lap. And she's like, why do you put your hand down here and see what's going on? Well, guess what? He, you know, he was fucking her. He had his dick in her. And I thought, I was just tickled. I thought it was really fucking fun and awesome. And she did too,

because it's playful. It's not dead serious. Nobody's thinking you're going to get married or blah, So that's one example. There were guys like, you know, they were desperate, like to fit. There are single guys that go, and they're in the worst shape at those places. You know, they're desperate to get with us. And I would do it, but it's all her. She is in control. She gets to make the decisions.

But, you know, we ended up having hilarious, fun, sexy as fuck times in, like these playrooms. There are people that we had connected with outside, like sitting with them at dinner or whatever and then we just wind up there and i mean it's it's almost comical just the shit that we got into like a six person kind of semi well it was an orgy and you know she's with it then so of course she's getting flogged she's she will not blow somebody besides me so that's not her thing she likes when people do to her so there's that although she likes girls and she will do to girls she likes eating pussy. She won't say, she won't describe herself as bi, but she does. So we're in this thing.

I'll just give me an example. Like, oh, what jobs are happening? She was getting fucked and this and that. And there was this one woman who we'd talk to and she's like, you know, I'm going to suck a cock. And I'm like, okay, I check it out, you know, visually with my wife. It's cool because it's like this way room. So this woman starts doing it. And then she says, oh, I want to do something else. And so she pushes me over. And then. just starts eating my ass, which is something that I fucking love. And this happened almost never in my life. My wife did it kind of once. She didn't hate it. It's just like sort of not her thing. So that happened. And then, you know what was great? All the fun, all the play, all the shit.

And then at a certain point, we're just coming together and we're going to fuck. And it's in this environment. And we've had all this fun and it's been low key and exciting and fun and funny. And we had the greatest sucks together that whole week like whether it was just us in our room or whether we're in the playroom so it kind of went like that and you know i'm just laid back i'm not worried i she can do whatever she has permission to whatever she wants and i'm more restricted and i respect that it's fine like you know we're moving gradually toward you know a little more permission for me but that we also have gone to weeks that specifically allow bisexuality. Here somebody told me a joke or a funny thing.

You know, those places exist so women can eat pussy. And when they have like a bisexual week, it's so men can suck cock. And it's kind of true. I think it's kind of true. So we go that week and it was interesting because there was more like sensitivity on her part and we had to talk about it like, you know, I said, believe me, Sugar. I mean, I'm... What was her sensitivity about it?

About you being more into guys and she's worried about it that maybe you'd leave her for a man? And she has it exactly backwards. Like, I'm very hetero. I only notice women. I'm super flirty, which she knows and she's okay with. When I'm out somewhere on the beach or whatever, I am only. Like, that's just my thing. So she kind of ends it backwards, but I think, like many women, she came to this thing.

It's like, well, but that's something I can't really provide you. And I said, oh, yeah, you can. We can just use Dildos or whatever. But so she had that insecurity. So she cut me loose to do some stuff. And it was interesting. I liked it okay. But I found out that my real sweet spot, and we haven't really, really done this yet.

But my sweet spot is like for her to be there. And MMS, you know, like two guys and her or couples where, you know, kind of anything goes, that's kind of the sweet spot. And we've been enough times now. that it's clear to me that that's my sweet spot. It's not the only thing. I'll do fucking almost anything. I'm super wide open.

I have that openness to experience, you know, you do the personality test. I'm like super high on that. I'm game. And she loves that because I'll go do anything and follow her down any road, any fantasy, very taboo stuff, and I fucking love it. So I kind of figure that out.

But we're finding this balance where she feels very, very secure and I tell her every time we go I'm like here's number one we are number one our connection is number one and the only times there's been any kind of like weirdness is when like by design you know we weren't together we were sort of separate I don't care about it it makes her nervous and so you know it's just been a learning process well most couples don't like to play separately anyway most couples have that as a rule where they only play in room together. A lot of people would feel anxious having their

partner fuck somebody else in the other room. You know what I mean? That's normal. Yeah. Yep. And she wasn't sure whether she wanted to see me suck a dick, for example. I mean, we play with that. She probably didn't know how she'd feel. No, but she's, I suck dildos in bed. She's been cool with that and we fantasize

a little bit with that and I go down her roads. And so, you know, I was off on my own, on certain times. And, you know, I think she found that that just isn't something she wants. to do and I'm like that's cool. She hasn't even tried it. Listen, I've heard many times women

think that they would have a very negative reaction to it and then they saw it and they were like fucking turned on by it. So how would she know unless she just like experienced it? I totally agree and here's what I respect in her. She's not going to do it with just some random dude that we

don't really know. It's going to be somebody that she knows or has met like let's say she's met and connected with down at the place. And then it's gonna happen. In fact, we know of a person that she had a great fucking time with on her own. No, I wasn't there. And we have talked that person about trying to meet us up there. And like he's not by, but he's down with the fact that I am. And so, okay, so she's open to it. She's going to try it. She is. She is. And she's not unlike me. It just needs to be a person that we actually care about.

That makes sense. Not care, care. But like a person that they got to be in. intelligent. They got to not be assholes on a power trip unless that's the game we're playing. And they just have to be like at least somewhat fit, not totally gross. I require, we both have, we're kind of dyes queens, if you will, and we have very specific taste in dicks. I am very lucky. I'm a short person with a big dick. And so we're spoiled, you know, like this is kind of what we want. And we're learning. And here's the thing. Ever since I came clean And like I say, it wasn't easy at first. I don't have the temptation to go out and do, you know, shitty stuff behind her back.

First of all, I didn't love it. But that desire would come up, you know, the horniness or whatever. I didn't do it for that long. But I don't have that desire anymore. And here's what I honestly believe. For me, it's not the same for everybody. Me being honest and me simply accepting myself, which took a lot of fucking works. means that I just don't, I don't have the desire to do that.

And ours is an evolution. I mean, you literally got to the point where you accepted your stuff. More or less. She's like fucking, she's more, okay, not less. Okay, what's less? She's about to watch you fucking someone else. She has you sucking on dildas. She's gone to adult resort.

She's been down on women. I mean, she's pretty much more, not less, okay? You literally, it's not just about you, like, except, it in yourself. Once you accept it in yourself and you put it out to your wife, she also accepted it and that's huge. So why would you have any? All those desires you had were you had them because they were

secret, but once they're not secret, it goes away unless you're addicted to like cheating and stuff. That's a whole other issue, but that was it. Most of the time it's a lot of people are cheating like in your situation and those desires go away when it's allowed. Of course. Yeah. Just to clarify,

she's great and where we are now is fucking amazing and everything you just said. What I was talking about was the first couple of years were not great. And it was very difficult. Was that right after you cheated? Like was it like a heart, like was it years of that? Was that the problem? No.

No. And it was about that I became open about my bisexuality. Oh, and you said you should throw new words and stuff and saying rude things about it. Yeah, yeah. That's all I'm talking about because she is amazing now. I could not ask. Look, we are mostly not out there.

Most of the time, it's just the two of us. We have a fucking great time. I'd never have better sex. The two of us are super fit. I'm as fit as I've ever been. She's as fit as she's ever been. She used to tell me, like so many women, you've heard this, I don't really have fantasies.

I don't really, bullshit. And once I loosened up and I became really like more open. I didn't force it. She loosened up too. She has some great fantasies. And because I'm the person I am and I just like, I was an actor at one point, not anything you'd have heard of but you know you know mostly stage but like i don't do anything i'll play any role so it's been really really great and listen i i didn't say this but it's important

she's seen me fuck lots of women now and she's down with it she's seen me amazing right she's seen me make out yes amazing and we are moving toward where when the situation's right if the situation is right I know that she's going to We're going to have that kind of situation A couple swap or an MMS or something Where it's going to happen And then we'll see You mean the guy on guy then?

Let me just say something too though About like the years of her coming around A guy, a fetish guy Like an episode where I was talking about a fetish Somebody once said this and it was so brilliant And it applies in this situation Because it wasn't like you had a fetish But you had this whole thing

And this whole you know All this desire that you had in you that you weren't able to come to terms with, you know, and it took you your whole fucking life to accept it. So, you know, what this one guy said to me once was like,

you know, why would I think that my wife would accept my fetish when it took me my whole life to figure it out myself? Of course, your partner's going to take some time. Like, for you, it took you your whole life to accept the fact that you were by

and understand what it meant and become clear about it and be okay with it and accept it. So of course it's going to take your partner some time to get to that. place too. It's not like just because you're now accepted, she's going to get it in two fucking seconds. Sometimes that happens

and that's great. But it didn't happen with you, but it makes sense. It took her a while to really be able to understand it as well. No, I agree. I agree. And here's the thing. I was kind of frustrated with the, when people come from a place of

fear, they can say really not things that they really mean and that kind of stuff I didn't look. But I want to tell you. And it was, I wasn't always this way as a human. I had to mature a little bit. I'm very proud of how patient I was. I never once lost my cool. Not once. I don't lose my cool at all anymore, like in an inappropriate way. But like, I was very patient with it. So you're right. I did have some frustration, but I'm not complaining about her at all. Let me ask you with her. No, let me ask you with her. Like what would,

like when she looks back on how terrible she was in those years and the rude thing she would say and how long it took her. Like, what is she, what does she say about herself, like, regarding those times? Like, what did she realize she, like, does she have any kind of conclusions about where she was coming from? Maybe, you know what I'm saying? Like, has she ever talked about that? Yeah. Yeah. We talk about lots, because, as you can tell, I thought. What does she say? And I love some. She said, basically, she just recognized after some work, her own work that, you know, her insecurities were based on this and that. And, you know, stuff goes back to, to childhood and all that. And so she just, look, I, those things hurt, but I don't dwell on them.

Of course I was upset about it, but I let stuff go. That's just kind of a thing that I've, I never did when I was younger. So she recognizes that it came from a place of fear and uncertainty. And I, I accept that. Like that's why, that is why I didn't, I didn't say, well, fuck you. You know, I didn't, it didn't feel good. Sometimes maybe what was said or happening, but I knew. Like, this is a big thing to drop on somebody. Here's the truth. A lot of guys, and I chat sometimes, but I barely, rarely chat like sexy chat.

But I like to talk to other guys that are, I'm a member of a couple groups of like mixed marriages or bisexual husbands or whatever. So I like to ask questions and all this stuff. But like there's so, you know, there's so many men whose wives just. I know if the men bear some responsibility, clearly, who knows how they're communicating, but they never come around. And I just feel so incredibly fortunate. And I'm telling you, the sex between my wife and I, and it's like three fucking times a week, and we're this age, it is the hottest, most mind-blowing sex I've ever had.

And listen, if she's not super up for it one night, she's like, let's have some sexy chat and I'll give you a hand job. I'm down. So I am lucky. I'm incredibly fortunate. But your story is also very like inspiring. You know what I mean? Because like you said,

there's a lot of stories that end with the wife never accepting it. But you're here to say like your wife really didn't, but you guys work through it and you had that patient. And you know, on the other side of things, it's completely the opposite. She's now totally down and you're ready to suck a guy's dick in front of her eventually. You know what I mean?

And so that's pretty amazing. She knows. Yeah, she knows. I really want that. And it's going to happen. I have no doubt it's going to happen. We're, we're talking about that one guy and we're planning another trip. And look, I'm the luckiest person on earth. I'm not perfect. I, you know, I'm not some wise name, but I really do think you hear a lot of people, I listen to Cook Podcasts and Hot Wife Podcasts. You know, the guys are not, can I get my wife to do this? You can't get your wife to do it. Don't try to make her go on a

Don't try any of that. Be honest about yourself and what you like. Be honest with her. I know it's scary. And just go from there. Be patient. Be compassionate. Recognize just like you say, Kathy.

It's like I had however many goddamn years of shame where I was suppressing myself in hiding. So I can't expect a person to be like, oh yeah, it's fine today. Exactly. So I think a lot of, it's a super hot thing. Believe me, I thought it was too. I didn't really think it would ever happen. And I was, you know, I would like it to happen, but I wasn't moping because we were playing with it in fantasy.

There is a middle ground. Sucking a dildo is great. It's better than any dick I'd suck. But also, I think what's really key, like, is that you were able to come clean. That's, like, the first thing. Like, that's amazing that you were able to really put it on the table. You know what I mean? You have to do it.

Yeah. I say to people when I'm, you know, discussing or chatting or whatever, you, have to be brave enough to do that. And it's scary because there are people out there. I think they're mistaken, but there are women, men, both, who they hear something like that. And in my opinion,

they're following a religious script or society script or family script or whatever. They will just be like, well, fuck you, we're getting a divorce. We have a great, we've had our rough times just like any 30-year marriage, but we have a great fucking marriage.

How tragic would it be if I said, hey, you know, look, I just want you to know. so I don't have to feel I'm hiding anymore. I am this way. I am bisexual. I don't think I'm naturally monogamous, but I'm not asking me.

And if my person's head, well, that's disgusting, fuck you and gets a lawyer and tries to accuse me in court of being a pervert. That happens. I know. I know. Terrible. I mean, I'm going to say some,

I have lots of opinions, but I'm going to say something that's really sad. Like men enforce this anti-gay thing, of course, out of insecurity, but I'm telling you, as you know really well. There are so many men, I think maybe older, more mature men who have a by-side. But the true enforcers, the people, in my opinion, and I'm not, my life jokes that I'm more feminist than she is.

So this is not misogyny. I got it. You're going to say the women are the problem? They are primarily the enforcers of that. They're the ones who can't handle it as much. And I'm not saying every woman. I'm just saying in my experience. That's an assumption.

It's an assumption, but I have seen enough that I think in marriages, I just think, here's my thing. I don't think it's anybody's fault. I'm not blaming women. What I'm blaming is a society that is really fucked up about sex. It's sex everywhere, but it's super, super repressed. And people follow scripts. And so I think, I think it's really cruel, even if your husband came to you and said, hey, you know, I'm by. And even if you didn't like it, I heard you say on a very recent episode or one that I listened to recently, like you did kind of yuck the dudes yum and the thing you were talking about just grosses me out. It was the eggs thing. Fucking disgusting. Like I, he put cum in his eggs. Do you remember that?

Yeah, sorry. I'm allowed to yuck someone's yum if I think that's crazy. What's the problem? That's my opinion. Nope. You are. But here's the way, here's the way I do it. I never yuck. Anybody don't. Oh, who cares? I can't stand people like you. That's what Doc Chocolate said to me when he asked me that question. He's like, oh, don't yuck someone's yum. I'm a realist. Okay, if I think something's fucking crazy, I'm going to be like, oh, my God,

that he wanted him to send me a picture. He eats his comment, a scrambled eggs. I'm sorry. You just said it's gross. You think that's not yucking someone's yum. You're doing the same shit I'm stewing. No, no, no. Say it to his face.

I would because I'm honest. That's a difference. Well, okay. Does that make you better than me? No, no, absolutely not. And it took me a long time to get there. I talked for a whole hour. He was a lovely man.

I just thought what he did was gross. Like crazy. You know what I mean? It was kind of crazy. That's what I said. Sorry. I agree. No, you don't have to apologize.

Good for you. I just have come to a different place. And I'm not better than you. This is just what I do. You just said it's gross. It is gross, but I would never say that out loud to a person. That's all I'm saying. I don't even think out, first of all, but wait a second.

No, I got to do. debate this little. There's no way I told him it was gross, okay, ever. Really, really when I was at, no, no, no, I didn't say any of that stuff to him. Honestly, the only time I've ever talked about it being gross is when I've been asked questions about who was the craziest episode you ever heard and stuff and I've said that out. But there's no way I said it to him. You're gross. Okay, sorry. Go listen to the episode actually and come back to me. Okay. And that's cool. Go listen to it. There's no way I did that. I believe you. I just, and again, I am not judging you. I think you're brave. Yes, you are. You just I do. No, I'm not. No, I'm not. You just said, I went and you yucked his yum. I didn't. Go listen to the episode. I just talked about it afterwards. Just like you said, oh, that was like the craziest. It was kind of gross to me because he literally said, do you want to see the picture? I just, I have it in my pants right now and I just made an omelette. Do you want to see the picture? That to me was like, no, thanks. I'm a foodie. Sorry.

Well, I concede the point. I, I'm sure I missed heard it. I did. The only reason I brought it up is I wanted to make this one up. Yeah, no, me too. But I can see that's fine. Your point is that you're so, you're very, listen, you've come a long way. You came from this very repressed place where you judged yourself so harshly to the point where you were like living a lie, a secret life, literally just allowing yourself to only fuck once a week being torturing yourself the whole life. Finally, you've come to a place and by no means, of course, would you ever judge anybody?

I'm one of the most non-judgmental people, like for real. You are. I totally get it. And you came to that place. I think that is amazing. Like you have literally changed your life. And what I love is that because I believe, no matter how old you are,

you know, or where you're at in your life, it's always time to completely change the fucking game. And that's what you and your wife did. And you guys are living your best life and finally being true to who you are. And that's fucking amazing. It is fucking amazing.

Listen, you are great. And I want to thank you for something in particular. I want to thank you for one thing in particular. Sure. Your advocacy for bicycle. men is really fucking important. Because that double standard drives me

and I and I do it in a calm way and I do it in a rational way. But I really appreciate your advocacy and you are non-judgmental. Because I'm a realist. It comes from, like someone said recently like, oh, you must be really into guy and good action because that's all you're ever pushing.

It's like, no, actually I'm not. And I don't know. I've never seen a guy blow another guy in front me so I don't really know, right? But it's not like, oh, that's my thing and that's why. It's because I'm into total fairness. And I'm also a realist.

Tons of guys are into guys, okay? It's a fucking fact. And the fact that there is still that stigma bothers the fuck out of me. Oh, man. Not fair, and it's not right to guys. There are so many guys that are doing it. It's not even right for women

because the guys are doing it behind their fucking backs. Okay, and they don't know about it. That's not cool either. You know, so nobody wins with this fucking stigma. I literally got so mad. I was on, like, this big swinger site on Facebook. it's actually amazing pineapple one-on-one he's got like 50,000 engaged swingers and I which one is it pineapple 101 it's like really great for swingers yeah he's great he built a

great site there but I posted something about I posted a guy on guy action episode there and I said listen this I'm posting this because this is very anti in the swinger community and I don't understand it and I love to put episodes out there because like I'm on a mission blah blah and somebody said it's there's no stigma or right this is a man talking there's no stigma around it we just think it's gross or We just don't like it. So that's why it's not allowed. And it's like, are you fucking kidding me?

That's even worse than a stigma. Forget about the fucking word. Just because you don't like something means it shouldn't be allowed because it makes you uncomfortable. What if you don't like women that are tall with brown hair and she's at a swingers club? That shouldn't be allowed either. It's such bullshit hypocrisy, garbage. It fucking pisses me. I agree.

And you, I cheer you every time. And there's some podcasts and people out there who do some advocacy, front porch swingers and not in gym. Yeah. Yeah. That guy was on my show. He gave me one of my greatest episodes. Yeah. And it's so cool.

Yeah. I make a point of emailing and saying, I am so grateful for your advocacy because it's, it is, I don't have to explain it to you. That guy is great. Yeah. No, that guy, he was on my show, the man and that partner, right, came out. And he came on and did a whole episode. And I'm like, good for fucking you because he's such an alpha guy.

Same with this other guy. Brooke and her husband, who's very much an alpha. I love those fucking alpha manly man, man, man. that come out and say, yeah, this is who the fuck I am. And I suck dick, okay? Because supposedly the scenario is the opposite. You're like a chick if you like guys and you're a guy. You know what I mean?

It's so stupid. It's really, really fucking stupid. Yeah, yeah. But we can talk about this for hours. I have to end. But, like, you know, this is the kind of stuff I do love to talk. I'm glad that you appreciate it. I'm glad that you came on and told your story.

And, you know, I think, like I said, it's super interesting because you talked about sort of the psychology around. it for you as well and where it came from and but the fact that you were able to turn things around I think is is inspiring. The fact that your wife was so rude about it too is actually a good part of your story because even that person was able to come around. So I feel like that gets people hope and it's such a great story because it has all of it in it, you know, the good, the bad and the ugly and the happy ending. Yeah. And it is a very, like super happy ending. But here's the way I put it sometimes to myself. I was repressed and given terrible messages about sex when I was

younger and then I fucking did it to myself for decades. I did it to my self. Of course. Yeah. Yeah. You took ownership. Right. Because at a certain point, unfortunately, all these, whatever's put on you as a child, like it was put on you. And now all that's left is for you to actually sort of untangle that and you have to go do something about it. And you did. And that's what it's all about. And of just sitting there like a victim. You know what I mean? Eventually it was you that changed things around and took control of it and, you know, and sort of been who you always were, maybe, been more true to yourself, you know, instead of like who your parents try to make you become. The question I would ask parents honestly is, do you want your child to be a happy adult?

And if you do, think about how the messages you got, do you want your child to be happy when they're an adult. And I'm guessing most parents do. And that should, that should help people see, like, just don't fucking put that shit on your kid. It's so bad. People don't understand that everything they do and they say to their children is either going to make their life easy or make their life just super difficult. And it's sad when it's the, you know, when people choose to not get out of the way of themselves and do the right thing because they can't. And sometimes people just can't, like I said, get out of the way of themselves and they fuck up their kids. And then their kids have a whole life of low self-esteem and all these kind of things because of.

what was put on them when they were younger. And that's a sad sort of thing. You know, my reason for having a kid was because I had all that stuff too, but my reason for having a kid was like, I'm going to have a kid and not do any of that stuff and just make the most normal, happy,

healthy, self-esteem person on the fucking planet. And that's how I pay it back. And I could die a happy person. Yeah. So listen, Chris, thank you so much for calling in. I love this whole story.

I could talk bigger picture with you anytime. It's like, I could talk to you for another hour. I got to go eat my dinner. I love the group. But thanks so much for calling in, Chris. I don't know. Obviously, I don't take pictures of wives

when they don't know that you're calling in or whatever, but you already have access to my Patreon, right? In my Discord? Yep. Okay, good. Okay, so you'll see the comments when it airs. And thanks so much for calling in. I'm going to talk to you for another hour.

Oh, I can talk. We could probably talk each other. I know. Thank you very much. Okay. Thanks, Chris. Thanks so much for calling in. Finally.

All right. Bye-bye. Did you come here looking to hear some super Hot Stories. Well, then I know where you can tune in and read a ton more hot stories, and that is in my book. Strictly anonymous confession, secret sex lives of total strangers. It's finally out. It's available anywhere where you buy books. The links will be in the description. The book contains 17 stories, sort of like the best of from every category I have on my show. There's a hot wife. a cock. There's a bull. There's a bunch of swingers. There's a gang bang girl. There's a gilf porn star.

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It's super fun. The only way you get in is through me. If you purchase the book, send me a pick of your screenshot. Email it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com, and I'll send you a private link to my discord. So if you want to buy the book, just go to the description and click on. the link. Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August

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around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audiobook is available coming out August 25th. But you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it.

I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. all you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook or the paperback. Send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous podcast.