Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 1559 - Andrew’s HOT Latina GF Led a Secret Life Full of Sex with TONS of Other Guys & He Eventually Found Out

Episode Date: August 19, 2026

Andrew’s hot, Latina girlfriend led a secret life full of sex with tons of other guys and he eventually found out and he called in to talk all about it. How he got his first wife into threesomes and swinger clubs and how and why that marriage ended, his next relationship and the swinger parties he threw while he was with her, how and why he was cheating on his partners back then, the super hot Latina he fell hard for and the red flags that started showing up after some time, the secret trips she would take and the lies she would tell him about where she was going and who she was with, why he continued to ignore the red flags and stayed with her, the time she left him in the middle of a vacation and the reason she gave him for leaving, how and why he took her back to her, the revealing pics and videos she had on her phone and the lies she told him about why she had them, how he finally found out what she was really doing behind his back and why he STILL went back to her after confronting her, how and why she would sometimes refuse to have sex with him and why it always had to the in the dark, what he saw when he finally turned the lights on one night and why even that wasn’t enough to make him leave, how the relationship finally ended and the crazy revenge texts she sent him afterward, what he learned about himself after the relationship and what he’s looking for now plus a whole lot more. GET A COPY OF THE STRICTLY ANONYMOUS BOOK! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY HERE: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  or Pre-order audiobook version ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   To see HOT pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! To join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[e-mail]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and click on "Be on the Show." Want to confess while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. All voices are changed.   Sponsors:  ⁠⁠⁠https://shamelesscare.sjv.io/xLQ3Jv⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get $15 OFF Shameless Desire or any other product at Shameless Care ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://beduc.at/pd2630-anonymous⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Click here to take the quiz and  get your personalized SUMMER roadmap to sexual happiness  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LoadBoost.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠- To get 10% off LOAD BOOST by VB Health, use code: STRICTLY   ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bluechew.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ — Buy 2 months of Bluechew GOLD and get the third month FREE! Use code: STRICTLYANON⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  Follow me! Instagram  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ X  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Website  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Everything else: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or a tile ad. You can't not do it.

The temptation is just too much. It's real problem. Do your friend know that you're banging her or no? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your freak flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-hide your whip. and shame. Here is your host, Kathy. Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast with Kathy. If you want to

follow the Strictly Anonymous podcast on Instagram or Twitter. Follow me at Strict Anonymous. If you want to be on the show, it's called Strictly Anonymous because they change everyone's voices and names. Okay. So if you have an interesting secret naughty life that you want to talk about while remaining anonymous or not anonymous if you're out and proud, you can email me at Strictly Anonymous podcast at gmail.com or go to my website strictly anonymous podcast.com and click on Be on the Show. Now listen, if you have a naughty confession, you want to leave on my confessions line. You could do that 247. The number is 347, 4203579. That's 347, 4203579. Call from a quiet place. I can't use ones when people call where they're driving. Some of those confessions make it onto a confessions episode. The rest go on to my Patreon. Now my

Patreon is super fun and it's very inexpensive if you ask me. It's only $7 a month and you get every single episode. I do seven episodes a week. You get every single one of them early before anyone gets them, as well as intro and ad free. You also get all the confessions and you also get Q&As that I do like every other month where I answer a lot of questions as well as you get anonymous picks of probably every single girl that has called into my show. Every single female guest, I got pictures of them over on my Patreon. Like I said, it's $7 a month. The link to Patreon is in the description. If you do sign up for my Patreon or buy my book, I wrote a book. It's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. It's all stories from my show

told in the third person. They're super fun. And the audiobook is coming out in August. So if you buy my book, either in paperback or ebook or audiobook version, the links are all in the description. I will also give you access to my private Discord. Like I said, if you join my Patreon, or if you call into my show or if you buy my book, I will give complimentary access to my private Discord. My private Discord is not a paid site. It is free, but it is private and you can only get in if I send you the link. I promise you, you will not be disappointed. My Discord is full of great effing people. Okay. So if you buy my book, send me a screenshot of your purchase and I will send you the link to my Discord. The last thing I'm going to tell you about is if you want to sign up

for SDC.com. I do have a free trial for my listeners. SDC is like the world's largest online and dating website and it's not just a place where you could hook up with people. You could learn all about the lifestyle. You could find out about all the lifestyle events and meetups and all kinds of things going on in your neighborhood as well as if you're going to travel and you want to have a little fun. You're going to find it all on SDC.com. Like I said, you get a free trial if you use my code 37712 or just go to the description and click on the link that's 37712 or just go to the description and click on the link. Welcome to the strictly anonymous podcast.

Strictly anonymous podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it. The temptation is just too much.

With real problem. Do your friend know that you're banging her? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your freak flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-hide your wits and change. Here is your host, Kathy. Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast with Kathy.

If you want to follow the Strictly Anonymous podcast on Instagram or Twitter, follow me at Strict Anonymous. If you want to be on the show, it's called Strictly Anonymous because they change everyone's voices and names. Okay. So if you have an interesting secret naughty life, that you want to talk about while remaining anonymous or not anonymous if you're out and proud. You can email me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com or go to my website, strictly anonymous

podcast.com and click on Be on the Show. Now listen, if you have a naughty confession, you want to leave on my confessions line. You could do that 247. The number is 347, 4203579. That's 347, 4203579. Call from a quiet place. I can't use ones when people call where they're driving. Some of those confessions make it onto a confessions episode. The rest of go on to my Patreon. Now my Patreon is super fun and it's very inexpensive if you ask me. It's only $7 a month and you get every single episode. I do seven episodes a week. You get every single one of them early before anyone gets them as well as intro and ad free. You also get all the confessions and you also get Q&As that I do like every other month where I answer a lot of questions as well as

you get anonymous picks of probably every single girl that has called into my show every single female guest. I got pictures of them over on my Patreon. Like I said, it's $7 a month. The link to Patreon is in the description. If you do sign up for my Patreon or buy my book, I wrote a book. It's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. It's all stories from my show told in the third person. They're super fun. And the audiobook is coming out in August. So if you buy my book, either in paperback or e-book or audiobook version. The links are all in the description. I will also give you access to my private Discord.

Like I said, if you join my Patreon, or if you call into my show, or if you buy my book, I will give complimentary access to my private Discord. My private Discord is not a paid site. It is free, but it is private, and you can only get in if I send you the link. I promise you, you will not be disappointed. My Discord is full of great effing people. Okay, so if you buy my book, send me a screenshot of your purchase, and I will send you the link to my Discord. The last thing I'm going to tell you about is if you want to sign up for SDC.com, I do have a free trial for my listeners.

SDC is like the world's largest online dating website, and it's not just a place where you could hook up with people. You could learn all about the lifestyle. You could find out about all the lifestyle events and meetups and all kinds of things going on in your neighborhood. well as if you're going to travel and you want to have a little fun, you're going to find it all on SDC.com. Like I said, you get a free trial if you use my code 37712 or just go to the description and click on the link that's 37712 or just go to the description and click on the link. Okay, I got a great story. It's a really cool guy. He's so honest about what he went through. And what he went through is like fucking cray cray. It's straight up out of reality TV.

Like I make a comment that like, oh my God, I've seen this on before the 90 days show, 90 day fiance. Like I watch reality TV. Okay. And this guy, like his story is just so crazy. And it's straight out of like I said, like a reality TV show because it's really extreme. You know, he lives an extreme life. He's had an extreme life. He talks about that.

He's been married twice. He was a drug addict, alcoholic. He's sober now. And he did meet the woman that we talk about. So when he was sober, but even though he was sober, he couldn't see the forest for the trees because, or the trees for the forest, whatever they're saying is, because, I mean, he wound up with one piece of fucking work. I mean, she was, I would, I use the word diabolical, but he uses the word gaslighting and explains

what that means, but it was like lying. I mean, she was just literally living a double life while he was with her. But he just kept going back and he talks about that. Like I said, that's where his honesty comes into play. He's very honest about everything. I mean, he was in the lifestyle with his first wife and he was, cheating and then his second wife he was in the lifestyle and cheating he cops all that but this one he wasn't cheating on her but she was cheating on him and living a double life and what she was doing

as her double life was like crazy and listening to it as i think probably his friends felt you're going to be like oh my god how can you go back to her and he went back to her so many times and he eventually left her and then he started his own podcast because he and he vented about it on his podcast at first and now he's doing talking about dating in the digital world over 50 because he's over 50 now and he's looking to date again, and we talk all about it. The whole podcast mostly is the story about his girl, and it's crazy. To me, I find these kinds of stories super interesting. That's why I do watch reality TV, and this is reality.

I mean, this is real life. It's very extreme, though. You're not going to believe the shit this lady was doing, and you're not going to believe that he stayed with her, okay? And it's literally like a car accident that you can't take your eyes off of the whole thing. But he's open and honest and cool. And he worked on himself afterwards, and he did finally leave her. So it's not like in the middle of the fucking mess that we're talking.

You know, he's on the other side of it. And you get the whole story. And it's super interesting. I could have talked to him for another hour. He's going to come on and tell his whole sober story because he was very much an addict previously. So we don't get into that so much on this episode, but we will in the future. But anyway, I'm going to get right to it and be right back on with Andrew. Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcasts.

Hey, Andrew. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Where are you today? I'm very good, Kathy. Thank you. You do call yourself anonymous, Andrew. How come is Andrew like a fake name too? Well, it's part of the story of why I'm calling in with my story. The anonymous is because the story I tell, the person in the story was breaking the story. the law. She was a immigrant and she was a professional escort. And I didn't want people to

know who she was when I started my podcast. That was nice of you. Like you don't want to get her in trouble even though she fucked you over. Because let me just tell people what you're going to be talking about. You're going to be talking about how she bamboozled you. I mean like the whole time you were like really in this serious

committed relationship ready to be married to this woman. And then you found out and we want to go slowly into that story because I like a good reveal, but you wind up finding out. She's living a massive double life, you know, and we're going to talk about how that happened. And now what you do, you did start your own podcast called Digital Dating Over 50. You kind of like now that you've sort of been there, done that and fell for that kind of a thing, you help others maybe not wind up in your position as well as how people over 50 get back in the dating field because I feel like that's

probably a place that a lot of people find themselves and it's a whole different world. Most people who are like, you know, maybe divorced and in their 50s weren't dating in the digital age, right? They met somebody when they were 20 when this shit didn't happen. So they have no clue, right? And they could really get taken. Yeah. So let's get your story. And so your podcast is called digital dating over 50. We'll, you know, we'll put a link to it in the description. But let's talk about your story. Andrew. Now, let me just ask you this. You were engaged to be married to her. Was she going to be your first wife or were you married or? Oh, gosh, no. I'm divorced. I got three kids, two grandkids.

How long were you married for to your first wife? This is like, I hate to say this, like seven years. We had the seven year itch. That's okay. That's better than two months or two years. I mean, seven years is okay, okay. But in that seven, we had two kids in that seven years. And then immediately I jumped into another one and had a third child.

Oh, okay. Another woman. Uh-huh. How long were you with her for? on and all 10 years okay so you're like a relationship guy and well Kathy that's interesting I wasn't yes you were I mean know thyself look at your history I was a very bad alcoholic and drug addict in those days but you were so that's okay me too I've been sober for like over 20 years and we'll talk about I love that I would probably get your whole recovery story on another episode because I would love to do that

I love those kinds of stories. But let me just say, you know, regardless of what was happening, I'm not saying you were good at relationships. Okay, you could have been a horrible relationship, but you were somebody that was a relationship person. You, yeah, when one ended, you got in another. You're either a relationship person. Yeah.

Some people are relationship people. Some people aren't. And I used to think like, oh, those people need somebody. Sometimes it's a need, but sometimes it's just people are like that. That's what they like it. I don't think there's anything wrong with it. You know what I mean? But I do think everyone's different.

I'm not a relationship person, but I don't look at you or people that jump from one to another as right or wrong. It's just, I think that's the way you're wired and that's okay. But maybe you were a terrible relationship guy. Yeah, that's the caveat. I was into the lifestyle and I tried to bring her along and she dipped her toe. What lifestyle? Oh, the lifestyle swing or lifestyle?

Were you into that with your first two marriage, the first two relationships? No, the first marriage, no. Well, no, I shouldn't say that. No, we did threesomes and we went to clubs and swinger clubs. Yep. Okay. So that's and who started that in your, that first relationship, when you're married? To be honest, we went to a strip club one day and she wanted to see what it was all about.

And she was really hot, like hot, lifeing. Uh-huh. And they, this club, they, they wanted her on the stage. She said I can do that. And I looked at it. I said, no, you can't. We went up to the manager and asked if she could do a thing. And he was like, sure, do you think you, she got up there, took her clothes off.

And oh, my God, we went home with like, I don't know, a couple hundred bucks. And that started it. The conversation was, hey, do you want to expand this and look into? And so we went to, we looked up a swinger club. And I'm in New York City. So there's a whole bunch of them. And back then, there was. We're in people's houses.

Yeah. So I went to one in Ozone Park, Queens, and we just had a blast. And, but unfortunately, the drinking and the drugging took toll on the marriage, and that ended that. Right. So that marriage ended because of your, like, using, right? Absolutely. Right. Okay.

And then you get in with the next person. Does that relate, do you continue, like, swinging and stuff with her? Yeah. So that was a quick one. I found her within. six months and three months later she moved in and i met all her friends and two of her friends were in the lifestyle and we continued to party i also had a friend who had a co-op in the beach one of the beaches overlooked in the ocean so he would go away and i had to watch his cat so i had the swinger

parties at this top floor this condominium did he know no he did not know he would not have been happy because he was going to be my first sponsor in AA before I entered A, but he, anyway, that's another story. Yeah, we'll talk about that on a separate episode. But I was having my own swing parties and in his co-op. And he was literally traveling in the world. He was an announcer, like he did commercials. Yeah, uh-huh.

And so he would go around the world and do, and he was gone for weeks at a time. And you were literally. You were literally using his place as a swingers club. He would fucking die if he knew. Yep. And he was gay himself and was living with HIV. And he was one of my best friends. It was interesting how we got together because I was very in a bad way.

It was doing a lot of drugs and he was sober. So it was just one of those weird things how we connected. But in any event, that lifestyle, he also helped me come out of the closet because I was by and I knew I was by. Yeah, there you go. And I would talk to him about it because I trusted him. So he brought me to my first gay bar experience downtown Manhattan in the village. And you had a hookup. And I, yes, I did. And it was pretty amazing. You know, when you carry a secret for a long time and it's a fantasy or whatever it is, and then you get to actually do it, it was, But I'll tell you, it was something I liked and I did for many years, but the core of me is more into women.

But I'm one of those guys that if you put a dick in front of me, I'm going to suck it. Yeah, I get it. A lot of people are like that. I feel like it, you know, it's a spectrum, right? And one side you have homosexual, other side you have heterosexual. And a lot of people fall in the middle. Some people are like 80, 20. Some people are 50-50, you know, either way.

So you're like mostly heterosexual. but you're little into dudes, right? 70-30. Yeah, there you go. There you go. And let me ask you this, though, were you doing that stuff like on the DL behind your girls back when you were in a relationship or did she know or were you doing that at a separate time?

She eventually found out. She didn't know it first. You were cheating on her guys. Oh, absolutely. And girls. Oh, interesting. So you were a cheater too. Eventually you wind up being with somebody that's like full of shit.

But you were like full of shit before. I was. People might say like, oh, Carmarov, you never know. But, okay, wait. So you were, do you cheat on your wife too? I, hmm. Oh, that's a yes. Well, what do you mean?

Yes and no. What does that mean? I love this. We swung. Yeah. But there was a couple times that I went, I even on my honeymoon, not my honeymoon, the night before my marriage, I went to a club and did some things that. Yeah, that's cheating.

matter if you guys are swingers and have an open relationship if you're doing stuff behind her back. And that's the thing that, and this is why you obviously were just so fucking high on shit because it's so stupid to think like somebody is with somebody that's open and so open that they allow this person to be with other people yet

this person is doing stuff secretly. It doesn't make any sense, right? But it's like, you know. And of course, in my mind, I rationalize it because she did it. I found out that she slept with somebody. So you rationalize. Or or after you wound up starting to cheat.

Were you revenge fucking? Or were you cheating at the same time and then found out later? It was more I had guilt. And when I found out that she did it, the guilt went away. Yeah. So you were doing it because of her. Yeah, I get it. But you can't look at your own stuff like that.

You know that. I'm sure as a sober person now. You know, regardless, you didn't, when you were doing it, you didn't even know she was doing it. So you were just that person that was like living a lie, doing something that wasn't really right, you know, and then you did it in your next relationship. And this is all why you're using. And like, as a person who's sober, too, like, I mean, one of the biggest reasons why I'm so glad I quit drinking is because a lot of people think, like, oh, your true self comes out when you use stuff. And I'm like, no, I think it's the opposite. I think like your worst self comes out.

And you're not being truly who you are. And you wind up doing terrible things that, you know, probably the core of you would never do. You know what I mean? And that's why it could be so, like, destructive for people, right? Like, because I know when I, I was drinking, I did stuff that I would never do now that I don't. You know what I mean? And that was what was so bad about it. It turned me into somebody that I wasn't. I don't believe it's the opposite. You know, so here you were doing all these cheating and doing all this like bad stuff. By the time you meet this girl that we're going to get into now, like, are you still using or are you sober at this point? Oh, no, no. I just celebrated 11 years of sobriety. I'm clean and sober. So what does that mean?

You were sober when you're with her because I don't know the timeline of these people. so okay uh i got sober in 2015 when did you date yeah her uh met her what was when did when did covid 20 2018 maybe 2020 i don't know who the fuck knows what i want to get the year that they the year they locked us down what was that like 21 i don't know some somewhere around there okay so you were sober by the time it happens oh yes yes yes let me ask you this one you were sober and like with people were you still cheating and stuff or did you completely change your life Right, okay, right. Not a cheerer anymore.

No, no. That girl, that second relationship, did she find out that you were cheating on her, too? The second relationship. The seven-year-one, the seven-year-one. Yeah, the third baby mama. The marriage was seven years. The third baby mama was 10 years. Yeah, she knew.

She knew. She found out you cheated. And we're friends today. That's cool. Yeah. Yeah, that's cool. Because our son lives. My son lives with them, with her, and I see her often.

But, you know, bygones, be bygones, I kind of thing. Of course. I mean, I don't understand people that could, I mean, listen, I get it if somebody, like, really, you know, cheats on you and does something so terrible, but, like, to hate them for the rest of their life, especially if you have to deal with them because they're the, you know, a parent to your child. You know, get fucking over it eventually. Like, you could forgive. Nobody's perfect.

You're a human being. Obviously, she probably saw a big change in you when you clean yourself up. You know what I mean? And she forgave you. And I had to do my amends with her. Yeah. There you go. the only one I didn't do was my wife because she was also, and nobody knows who I am,

so she's in the program too. So she was just as bad as I was. But the second one was not. She didn't drink a thing and didn't do anything. And so let's get to the third, whatever. Okay. So you have all this messy shit going down before. You are, though, open sexually in your life, regardless of what you were, you know, doing.

But you were like, you know, in the lifestyle and stuff. So you meet this third person. online i'm assuming yes okay harmony okay harmony okay which i don't i don't recommend but that's yeah but it whatever founder she was a latina which is one of my favorite uh asians and latinas are my favorite and she was Kathy I then I didn't know but she was a Miss universe contender for Ecuador. And I won't say the year, but that's how hot she was. And she didn't look a day anywhere near her age. So at the time I met her, she was like 50 maybe, but she looked 40, maybe, maybe on a bad day, you know, and you put her in a bikini and she loved the beach. We would go to the beach. And I had to

like protect her from all the guys. Well, listen, Latin women, they keep. like it's in their genes, like in their bodies. They're just like naturally muscular in their skin. Like they just, I mean, I just unfortunately, and I'm a white woman, white women age the worst, you know what I mean? But Latino women, I mean, they look fucking killer. And, you know, and her bodies hold up. Yeah.

She put, she had an implants done and she had other work done, but not, you couldn't tell. Whatever. She was smoking hot. She was smoking hot. You like sexy girls, right? she's that type of person and that's like your that's what you dig that's your type yep okay so we meet and we date and she tells me that she just divorced her husband of 20 years because he cheated on her and she was mortified that a man would stray from her beauty not her her yeah i get her vanity was

severely damaged like you know who the fuck would cheat on me you know yeah Guys are lining up around the world to be with me. So she divorced them and went on dating apps. And at the time, I didn't know this, but it was more for revenge. She wanted to go out and get validation that she was still beautiful at her age and that she could get guys. So we dated. Well, can't you understand that? Now I do.

At the time, I really genuinely thought she was into me. And she was, but this is where the story gets crazy. same time. Yeah, listen, she has her own things. We're going to get to that. But let's just talk about like, so you meet her. She's super hot, right? She's, she's on there acting as if she's looking for a relationship. Maybe, you know, subconsciously, she's though doing it just to get that, you know, to feed her ego because of what happened. And, you know, that's normal. That's normal. I mean, what happens later is not normal, but I mean, there's nothing wrong with that. It's called rebound, okay? And so many people are on it. that's what you got to, you know, that's a red flag.

There's holes in her story, though, about the marriage, because when you find out what she does for a living, I wonder, did he know? Because what she does for a living, you don't do, you don't start overnight. Yeah, I got it. Okay, so, but let's not go there yet. So let's go to. Okay. So you meet her, you, you're looking for a relationship, right?

And she's on there, like, I just got divorced. I'm looking for a relationship. You go out. what goes what starts to happen in the beginning when everything's great so we literally it was in the summertime so like i live by the beach i'm out on long island so i'm right by the beach and she loves the beach so we would literally go to the beach she'd come down here on Fridays and stay for the weekend and we just live at the beach and then come back here and talk our brains out she was one of one of the best in bed that i've had in my life unbelievable yeah of course she had her boundaries and

stuff but anyway so that went for a good year and it was I was so enthralled and in love with this woman she validated me she fulfilled me you know all the all the co-dependence stuff that co-dependence look for she she filled and I think after one year she was done with she she found that she can be loved again and can be attracted attractive or she thing. And it's then, as I look back, I started seeing her activities and her actions disappearing, not answering calls. How long into it was that after the year? Like what after the year was over? It was like the next, that's around the timing of when you start to notice weird things. Yeah, it was a slow burn. Like the first year I look back, it was just beautiful. She went on a trip to

Florida and she said I I was like I'll go with you and she said no I'm going to see a family member and she didn't want people to know that she was with me she said to me we have to keep this relationship secret no Facebook pictures no Instagram all that stuff and that was my first red flag that I missed or that I or I say I chose to ignore yeah goes to Florida and she says to me I'll be back in a couple days I'm just going to visit my brother but I can't take you I'm like okay so she's down there and she's facetiming me and at night before she goes to bed, but she's whispering and she's in a room somewhere in the house.

And I'm saying, why are you a spring? You know, and she's like, oh, he's sleeping. I'm going to wake him up. And here comes the gas lighting. Right. So and then. What is gas lighting? Can I just ask you something like,

I don't understand this fucking term and so many people use it and so many people use it and it. Like is gaslighting lying? Is this where she's just like lying? Is that what gas lighting is? Lies, but. to the point where you believe it. Well, that you believe it or she believes it?

Like who's, like, what's that? No, that I believe it. Well, isn't all lies like, I mean, you know, what's the difference? You said, so it's a good lie? Gaslighting is good lying. It's a manipulative. It's manipulative. Yeah, I got it.

She manipulates you into believing that I'm crazy. Yeah. So when I was talking about, okay, okay, you're kind of like, okay, I get that now. That's gaslighting. Okay, I get it. Yeah. So a couple of days later, she starts sending me some pictures of her and her brother. It didn't look like her brother. There's no way. And it was an older gentleman

and they were taking pictures of themselves like laughing and rolling on the floor. And it was not. Oh my God. With her brother. This, this. Kathy, this is where my, my radar went off. And I said, this is not her brother. And this is not a family out. So I called her out on it again. Yeah. And you know what she said to me? If you don't like it, there are plenty of men waiting to take your place. That's exactly what she said to me. And that shut me down in an instant. But it was like, I'm going to do what I want.

And if you don't like it, you know, fuck you. So I backed off. And she came back a couple days later. And we continued. And then her activity, again, odd, disappearing. And then when she would come over for the weekends, And she would say to me, we can have intercourse this weekend, but, you know, I'll take care of you. Or you could jerk off on me.

And I was like, why? And she first was, I have a UTI. And I would say, okay. Yeah, first UTI. Yeah, maybe first UTI. Well, by the way, we did have sex, a test done early. So we would not have to use condoms during the relationship. Right.

So, and I said to her, if we ever make a promise, if either of us, raise and cheats, we have to use a condom. And so there was a couple times she would say to me, you got to use a condom today. And I was thinking, like she'll say UTI. Now I know she was years later, and I did my investigation, I found out that she was in gangbangs. She was in. Yeah, don't get there yet. I like the reveal more. Okay. Anyway, go on. So, but again, I would call her out on it and she would lie to me. She would look at me and just. Compulsive liar. Yeah, everything. things are like. And when you have a naked Latina on your bed, spread eagle saying, let me talk to your dick. And you're going to believe whatever. You want to believe her. You want to believe her.

You do believe her. Yeah. Any guy understands. Even girls, like, I've been a woman with a guy that I was like so addicted to sexually that I believed every word out of his mouth too. I mean, that sexual pull, that sexual pull could be very strong, you know what I mean? And powerful. It is she used to it as a weapon. It was amazing. I mean, I got to just tell you, though, like, I just going to say this real quick, because I've heard guys talk about women in that way before in that, like, she's purposefully using her body and sex in a minute. Like, no, she's not, but she is. Like, I get that it is a form of manipulation because she's hot. She could do that and everything, but it's not like a specific

tactic that a woman uses, like, on purpose. Like, I'm, going to manipulate him by being hot in bed. She's just fucking super hot and she's into sex and she's good in bed. And so it feels manipulative. She's manipulative. Yes, but it's not purposeful. Do you know what I mean? Everything else is, I mean, she's a fucking liar.

She's living a double life and everything. But she's not specifically like, oh, I'm going to fuck him really good. So he believes whatever. She just happens to fuck really good. And you believe everything she says. And that's how she gets guys. Well, this is the part that confused me because what she was doing outside the relationship.

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Yeah, to be that compulsive and every word out of her like her mouth be a lie and also be somebody that is living this double life. Like, I get it if you want to do all that shit in your life. But like, why have a relationship too? And but she's lying. And to be so diabolical, but to be sending you pictures and pretend it. You know what I mean? It's like she's like, she's not really all there, right?

Like something's wrong, most likely. Because it's like it's so, like I said, diabolical, you know, that she's doing all of this. It's extreme, you know? But you don't know at this point yet. I mean, she's still just lying to you. I don't know anything. I just know that her. her what she's what I'm seeing laying or telling me is not lining up with her stories with

her phone calls with yeah yeah yeah it's maddening isn't it that's maddening and she she would go to florida three or four more times or tell me it was florida and i had no way of tracking her but again it was always a story about she's going to meet somebody that i can't meet and at one point this was like almost maybe two years in now and i said to her one day one that I said, listen, we're going to Florida. So I booked us a place. My son lives down there. I booked us an Airbnb down in Fort Lauderdale, and we flew down, went to Key West the first day.

We went snorkeling and had a great time, came back. That night, she started a fight with me and about something about dinner. It was so stupid. And I go to bed. She goes to bed first, turns the lights out. I'm hungry. I go out and get something either. Come back.

and I go to bed. And in the morning, I go to an AA meeting at 6 a.m. So I looked it up and I said, I need a meeting. So I go to a meeting. I come back from that meeting at 7.15, she's gone. Her luggage, her belonging, toiletries, everything. No note, nothing. She cleaned out the place and it's gone.

So I'm thinking she's got an hour head start on me. So I start calling her, of course, and checking the local bus stops and because I She had no car, right? I rented a car, but she didn't have the keys. I had the car. It took me about three hours before she finally picked up the phone, and she says she was on an Amtrak train heading back to New York. And why?

She didn't like the way I drove on the I-95 coming back from the keys yesterday. Wait, let me ask you this. In the car, though, did she complain that you were driving too fast or too slow, or you were like making her sick? I was wet from snorkeling. So I asked her if I could change my t-shirt and I'm in the middle lane and like I can do and some guys can do I can steer with my knee. So I changed my shirt with my knee on steering wheel. Yeah, I got it.

And I'm probably doing 80, but you can do 80 down there. Yeah. But she said it made her nervous. Yeah, I get it. Okay. And didn't say anything at the time. Right. But use that later as her excuse.

Oh, my God. Right. And so this is what I'm getting as. why do you, so I'm like, you leave, by the way, I'm not cheap, but you know, this was a $5,000 trip. Yeah, crazy. I mean, to leave a vacation for that, so I can say. For that, so again, I wait till you hear the rest of it is. So we hang up and I go to my sons and I finish my vacation. We, we, he, but I'm, I'm in my, my mind is like, you know, marshmallows. So I come home and I don't hear from her.

I don't call her. I'm done. In my mind, the lies, the cheating, whatever, I'm done. Five days later. But you don't know that she's cheating on you at this point. It's just lies. I don't know, but I suspect. Right, but you don't have any proof yet.

I don't have any proof. Yeah. She calls me five days later. Now, I'm still on vacation. I took like, I don't know, two weeks or something. I'm sitting home and she calls me and she says, hey I'm outside can I come in and talk to you and I'm I was like I'm really shocked I said sure she comes in I lit her in and we sit on the couch and I'm all yours I'm like because I got to hear this

I mean you left me in Florida it's a week later and now you're sitting on my couch what do you got to say for you I mean that whole two weeks since she like however many days before this call you were blowing up her phone trying to get in touch with her was she ignoring you like why were there no conversations until now when I flew home I was done with her. No, no, no. Oh, so when you were there, you were so pissed at what happened that you were like not chasing after her. You're like, fuck off.

Right. Okay, I had called my sponsor. I spoke to my son. I spoke to several people. And they're all saying, what more do you need? By the way, I had complained about a lot of her. Of course. A lot of people.

You have to. And they're looking at me like, what are you doing, dude? Yeah. So this was my opportunity to cut the, Yes, yeah, makes sense. But now she's sitting on my couch in the most beautiful summer dress. And within 10 minutes, I'm agreeing to give it a second chance. I mean, it took nothing from her to, I want a chance.

I'll even pay you for the flight. She took out her checkbook and was going to write me a check for the vacation. And, of course, I'm like, no, you don't have to do that. And we worked out an arrangement that the next time you go to Florida, she'll pay for the airfare or something, whatever. But I took her back like an idiot. And this just went on. And then two weeks later, she's in my bedroom going,

we can't have intercourse this weekend. So, you know, it was, it just kept going on and on and on. And one day, I suspected that, oh, we were, we were taking, I asked if I could take pictures and she said yes but no no face and she came to me and said you need to delete those off your phone or send them to me and then delete and I said okay and then she shows me pictures that she has of her Kathy there had to be a gigabyte of videos and pictures of her on her phone and she's only one I saw with another man and she gave me the story behind that.

It was before me. Yeah. And everything was her walking around naked, posing. They were really nicely done. And I'm thinking, so she says to me, do you think I could sell these online and make any money? Because at that point, she was running, get this. I don't know what I should say this because this could out her. She had a business that.

Yeah, you don't need to be specific. But say she has. This is why I go by anonymous. Yeah, of course, of course. The information I tell about her. So she had a business at home that was shut down because of COVID. And she couldn't do it anymore. So she was kind of living on her savings.

So she was looking for ways to make money and wanted to know if she could sell her photo. Would I be okay with that? Yeah. In the meantime, she already was. These were only fans' photos that she was that she had. So she already had an account. Like she's pretending she doesn't have it though. That's what's so crazy.

And you still don't know though at this point. You're revealing things. But at this point, when she's showing you this shit, you do not know that she already has something, correct? Kathy, in 1999, 2000, I had one of the first porn sites on the web. It was called Andrew's Paradise. And there was me and maybe 10 others. And I was a pretty big thing back then. It was simply me scanning naked photos of women.

And all you would do is scroll. But that's all there was. It was. If you think about it, 1998, it wasn't what we have today. Yeah. So, anyway, I'm familiar with the porn business and I'm familiar with pictures online, blah, blah, blah. So I look at her and I'm thinking, oh, how could we really make money? And I looked at her and said, absolutely. I said, let me, I'll manage you and we'll sell these.

And then I realized what am I saying? I said, no, I don't want that. And I told her no. And after I thought about it. And it became a dead subject for that day. It was just forget about it. And a week or two later, she disappeared on me for a weekend. Just I couldn't get a whole of her.

So at this point, I put the pictures together. I put the, I can't have sex with you together. All these little clues, I say to myself, there's, she's doing something. It's not like she has a boyfriend on the side. She's doing something to make money. I had a person that I knew that was an ex-sex worker. She was, she got out of the business, and I helped her. It's another whole part of my life story.

I was helping people back in the day. And she came to me for help and I got her out of the sex work business and she's now a sheriff down in Tennessee. And I called her because she used to work this area. And I sent her the picture and I said, I need you to call anybody that you know who's still in the business and pass this picture around and find out if she's dancing anywhere up here or escorting or whatever. And a week goes by and I get a phone call at 6 a.6 a.m. in the morning and it's my friend. And she says, I got some bad news for you. She goes by Luna or Lunita and you can only get her if you go to this club.

I don't think I should name the name. No, don't. Don't. Just keep everything like not specific. You got to be a VIP of this club and then even then you need to know somebody. And she was one of these 2,000 to 5,000 a night escorts. Right. And they would fly her around the country.

Right. Possibly the world because she did go. go to Spain at one point. So that's, I'm getting, and then she gave me so much detail about her, who, the, who, who, what they call it, the mother, the, the, the, there's a woman that runs the brothels that I forget what they call her. Yeah, she gave me, too. I know what you're talking about.

Yeah, she gave me the name of her manager. Uh-huh. And, uh, told me to which club it was. And, and, and I had so much information that it was, like, why, why, would she make this up my friend? Yeah, of course. They said they identified her immediately. They knew, but she was like way above everybody else. So I had to call her out on it. So she comes down one weekend. I sit her down and I say, I know what you're doing on the side. And she's, I have no idea what I mean. And I said, I know you're selling yourself. I was trying to be, you, one thing you don't do is call a Latina, a whore. You just don't do that.

Right. You will lose your balls so fast. Yeah. I don't think you should call any woman a whore. Yeah. Well, yeah, but okay, true. I know what you mean, though. Yeah, I get it.

They're going to be, you're going to be in trouble. I had to do it very diplomatically and gently. And either way, she got up and was furious. And I started throwing things at me. And then, of course, I don't know if you know the culture, but she took her shoe off and started hitting me with a shoe. I'm just going to tell you real quick. I don't know.

You probably don't watch before the 90 days. It's the 90 day fiance show. You remind me there was that there's a couple. I don't know if anyone. I love reality TV. There's a couple. It's like a white guy like you that was married to this, you know, going to be married to this crazy, hot as shit Latina who loved sex.

And he was like so in above his head with her. And it really is like you guys would have been, this whole thing would have been great on the show. It's so up the alley of that. show and you remind me of them. I'm like, that's who I'm picturing. I'm picturing that guy as you and her. And anyone that watches that shows knows exactly who I'm fucking talking about. But anyway.

And that's why I started the podcast. And I do think there's a book in here somewhere. But, you know, I also have a day job and three parts, three other, two other podcasts. So I don't have time. But anyway, she denies it. And I even, she says, tell me what club this is. And I tell her. And she grabs my hand and says, we're going.

to that club right now. Let's drive there and let's see if anybody knows me. And I look at her and I'm like, what? You think that if we're going to first go with daytime, so anybody that would be there wouldn't know her because if she's not. And I was told that she didn't work necessarily at the club. That's just where you went or you had to be the member there to get a booking with her. Yeah. So I said, that's not going to do it. It's, you know, not to mention she can make a quick phone call text or something to say, hey, guys, I'm coming there. No, but the moral of this story, like the thing that's so crazy about this exact point here is that she's still fucking lying.

Like, it's so those kind of ladders are so madding because you have now proof like me and she's still like, ah, you're fucking crazy. I can say it. And I took her back because she convinced me because she was willing to go to the club. I said, well, at the time, I look back now and I'm like, I could see how she would have manipulated that. but no you were like you had lost your mind in this relationship she had you had been I think people would use that other word that's very common it's like

gasoline is I think you were groomed oh groomed by her but that this is what I don't understand if she wanted this life of hers why keep me in it you know because she's like you she's a relationship person so a lot of people are like that they need to have that with the stability thing and who knows what's in her head I'd have to talk to her. But a lot, it's like, there's a lot of people that you could say that same thing that are living double lives.

You know what I mean? That's like, why can't you do that all alone? Why do you have to have this other person? Well, then open up to me. Come to me. And say, she was like a compulsive liar.

Like you said, she probably had some sort of disorder, trauma, things going down. I mean, this is not like a normal person thinking things through like a normal, like you can, it's like,

you're just trying to, she's speaking Chinese and you're trying to like translate it. You don't speak Chinese. Like, she's not, that you. No. So you can't, we can't get in her head. She's crazy. Yeah. No, no, no. But, but, but this happened once before to me. I'm like, if you would

just come to me and say, hey, I'm into this lifestyle. I know, but the problem with it, but this is why you get attracted to these people. And I used to too, and I get it. It's like, because you're trying to make sense of it. Like, you can't turn away from it until you figure it out. And you're never going to. That's what, you're never going to. Right. And that's, yeah, and that's what you need to figure out. And that it's just not. You'll never know. And who cares? You know what I mean?

But when you get obsessed with that and when you can't figure it out, I get it and you get attached to that, that's what's keeping you there. And it's going to, you're never going to then let go because you're never going to get the answers that you're looking for. Never, okay? It will never make sense to you. No. And it still doesn't because it is now going up on four years.

Yeah. But there's a little bit more. Oh, no. We're not at the end. What are you kidding? I love this whole story. You still haven't. She still hasn't cop to it.

No, she won't, but she now talks me back into that I'm crazy. I am, whatever, and she wanted to know who this person was that told me. I somehow told her that I had an ex-escort friend that I got out of the business. You were honest, yeah. But let me just tell you, let me just rephrase that sentence that you just said, maybe this will eventually help you live in your truth. But, like, she didn't, like, force you anything. Like, you, she didn't trick you.

Like, you allowed yourself. to be taken back into that relationship. She didn't do that to you. You allowed that to happen, okay? When you start looking at things and just really sort of taking your own accountability for it, I think that helps like to let go because, you know, why were you there? Like, why were you always going back? Like, you know, and that's like eventually all that matters because she's fucking gone

out of your life and you're alone. You're not with her anymore. So it's like, what about you that kept going back? What's your problem? 10 years older. She was beautiful. And I never thought that I would find anyone as beautiful as her again. So is ego.

As good bed. Ego and a hard on. There you go. So what does that say about you? Exactly. And that's why when this finally ended, I'm jumping ahead. But I took several years off before I dated again. I have to look at myself deeply.

I really did. Yeah, that's good. That's good. Listen, we all bring people into our lives. And I mean, I wrote a whole book about it. I've only had bad relationships. I did a whole cartoon book. And at the end of each fucking terrible relationship that ended badly that I was in,

that guys treated me like shit and I was like a foot. Like, what was I there for? What was my fucking reasoning? And I always came to that conclusion and then moved on and then went to another bad one. But like, but you learn about yourself and people come in, I believe in life more than anything. And I don't care what anyone else says.

This is what I've always believed. And this is why I could be friends with every one of my exes, no matter what they did to me is because I believe that people come into our lives to help us deal with parts of ourselves that need tending to. And that's what it's all about. Well, we're not my worst relationships than the guy that was the meanest to me. When he read my book, he was like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I'm like, what are you talking about?

Like, I should kiss your ass for what you did for me. You help heal a part of myself that was always there, by the way. That woman's not creating something in you. She's just tapping into something that was always there. And now it's your time. Exactly. So that's what it's all for. But let's get to the point where you're done with this relationship,

because you're still in it with her. You just went back. Yeah. So a couple of weeks later, she pulls in all the stunt. She shows up at the house and we're in bed and takes her clothes off. And again, I get you can't have intercourse. And this time, oh, by the way, all the time. Can I just tell you something that I just got to break it. I just don't say it. I'll give back to the story.

I know exactly where you are. I really give her credit. She's such an interesting concoction, like a fucked up concoction. But the fact that she's like doing all this. But yet she's actually like protecting your sexual health is like kind of interesting because she could have been totally never saying that. Like you know what I agree. Oh, absolutely. I'm like, that's what's like kind of interesting about her.

She's got this weird, you know, and everyone is like a concoction. You know, it's so interesting that she's all these like crazy things. But yet she's like giving herself up a little bit to actually keep you safe when she needs to. Which is very interesting that that's also a part of them thing no longer work. In other words, for the first time, a couple times with the condom, you know, how many times can you get a UTI in one month, you know, or in three months? So she cut. And by the way, every time we were intimate in my house, we had to have the light dark, like dim, all the way down. And she even went out and bore black curtains.

And to this day, I still have them in there. But why? She couldn't have an orgasm unless it was pitch black. And I, at the time, just thought it was something about her. And she had these amazing orgasm that lasted like, I don't know, five minutes. I find out later that it was because the marks that I would see on her body. And here comes the grand finale. Okay, I love it.

That day, I turned the lights on. That is a great story. I looked at her pussy. And it was, it looked like meatloaf. It was pulverized. And it looked like she went through a 24-hour gang bang. It was so bruised and battered. And I'm looking at her and I point to it and I say,

what the fuck is this? And she says, what are you talking about? Just like that. Like it's like I'm seeing nothing. And I said to her, you know, I hired a private investigator and I, which I did. And he went out and we found you sneaking out of the house at like midnight on certain nights. and she said show me the pictures and i say well i don't have them on me but and the detective did have him but it cost me i don't want to tell you how much it cost me but it was a lot of money to hire this

guy to follow her for a week and he couldn't come back with the conclusive what she was doing but we did find that she left the house so she lived with her ex-husband but in a two-family house so she moved upstairs and he stayed downstead so she would see sneak out the back door and come around. And she would do that when I pick her up. When she would stay over, she said leave her car home. I would have to come get her. She would sneak out just the same way as the detective PI photographed her coming out of the back of the house.

So she was sneaking out of the house every couple nights a week or, you know, she lived out on Long Island. So I approach her with this and she's, again, like I don't. don't know what she's talking about, show me the proof. And I said to her, I'm done. I just can't do this anymore. I said, you know, and I literally threw her out of the house. And I skipped the whole part about engaging. We went and got engaged several weeks earlier.

Wow. I mean, your friends must have been like, you're fucking nuts. Your friends were all like, oh, my God. I took her to Pennsylvania where my sister is. And I took it to a beautiful place called the Grand Canyon of Pennsylvania. and we had all the tourists clap and I got down on one knee and I proposed to her and this ring I don't want to tell you what that cost. And what's funny is the day that she came over, she was going to come over and help me clean the apartment because actually the first floor of a house, but she was going to help me clean. So she took the ring off and put it on the windowsill in the kitchen.

So that afternoon when we were done cleaning and getting in bed, and that's when I noticed the pulverized pussy, is when I threw her out and she grabbed her clothes, grabbed her pocketbook, and yelled at me in Spanish. Did she forget the ring? Yes, she forgot the ring. She left the house so mad and so angry that, and that was it. That was the last day I saw her. And there was some phone calls like several days later, but. I was done. I just couldn't do it anymore if I was a man. I said if I'm a any at that point I was a

shell of a man but I mean my my worth my self worth if I took her back or allowed her to talk me into it again you know who am I inside a couple about a week later I get a WhatsApp ping and I look at it and some woman in Spanish telling me hey and you know if you're familiar would tell the telegram and what's that app a lot of them are just what's what word can i use they're looking to sell you something right oh yeah it's like scams she's this bond starts sending me pictures and it's and it's my girlfriend and naked and they were some pretty harsh pictures like she was getting fucked from all different views and i said to this person who are you and she was like oh i just thought you would enjoy my pictures and so she was now rubbing it in me like uh trying to

rub it in my nose, whatever, whatever. Oh, you think that this is your ex. You think that this was your ex doing this to you so that you could now, like, she's like being revenge. She's being, she knows she lost you and now she's going to fucking shove your face in it, is what you're saying. You think it was her.

She just said, hey, I want to see my naked pictures. It was her, though. It was your ex saying this is what you're saying. But, right, but this was, her name was not her name. Right, I get it, I get it. You're saying that she's pretending. Right, she goes in there as another person, but you believe, though, that it was your ex doing this. And I said to her, and I called her by her name, and I said, you know, you're pretty low and you're, and I said it again, you're a whore.

And I said, you used to be ashamed. And I had a couple more words. And then I blocked her. And that was the last time that I spoke or talked to her or even saw her. then months go by and of course there's a couple of social media inquiries that I get and that point I had started the podcast so I was really all over Instagram and TikTok and I get on I get the woman that was the sheriff down in down south I know her profile but the name with a different ending shows up as a follower of mine so that's my

my ex stalking me on social media and telling me, yeah, because the name of the woman down south is a very unique name. Yeah, I get it. Very unique. So I listened, the first season of my podcast was all about my story. The second season is about learning to heal this type of trauma because I really went through some traumatic things and learn how to not be codependent. And, It evolved until now it's just about learning how the date in today's age because it sucks out there. It's a really thing. And maybe you're back on. And maybe because you've been through so much and you're maybe on the other side of it,

you want to find somebody else again as a relationship person. Are you looking for that in your life right now? So I stayed single purposely for at least 18 months or two years. And I went through some therapy. And then I decided to dip my toes in the water. And yes, I started dating. I put my couple profiles out on some dating apps. And then I even covered them and I kind of made a public on my podcast.

Like I'm dating and I talked about my dates. And yeah, I went on a god about two dozen dates in a year. But there was something, Kathy, that I just couldn't put my finger on it. There were some beautiful women. I wasn't ready. Yeah, that could be. Yeah. But you were like dipping your toe in.

I wanted somebody. I was, first of all, I hadn't got late in two years. You know, I was lonely. And my summers were becoming, I mean, I have friends and I go to the beach still like when I'm done with you and down there. I started playing pickleball. You know, I started, my life kind of turned around, but I'm still single. Oh, you still are, right. But you would like to be in a, do you think you're ready now to be in a relationship?

I would like to find out. I think I am, but I need to find the woman. And then I wonder if I'm going to trust that woman. Yeah, it's hard, unfortunately, when you would. But like, you know, you've been in therapy, you work through it. Do you, like, do you have, like, do you have an understanding of maybe why you stayed in that relationship for so long? Why you, like, do you, did you come to the conclusion that you were codependent? I mean, you use that work. Yes. Right, right.

And that's a thing that you have to work through, you know. And I did. And I did a lot of writing and a lot of, and the podcast helped me. That was kind of my platform where I could talk about it. Yeah, that helps. There's a couple of women that I am dating that I would like to make it further. I'm just for some reason I'm not pursuing them aggressively enough. And I'm usually very forthcoming when I, when I just ask you a question, though, and I don't know if, I mean, I'm an addict.

So I know sometimes, and because you're an addict, right? I know this because you're in recovery and you're so. I am. That a lot of times addicts, you know, a big part of like the thing before and the thing that you have to get used to after is like not sort of, you know, swirling around drama all the time. You know, there's like an attraction to drama. It's the feeling that you get. It's the same feeling you got when you were on drugs and alcohol. You know, you're searching for that feeling of being up.

You know what I mean? that excitement and stuff, you know, and, you know, that girl gave you a lot of fucking drama, okay? And that probably was very, that probably gave you a lot of high moments. Not good. It's not about being good, but it's about feeling fucking high and drug, you know, it's kind of like taken over those drugs for you because it was like so crazy that that's like that kind of drama, like, you know, could have been replacing all that stuff. Like, like maybe, you know, you need to learn to live. And I think that like as a sober person for like over 20 years, like you really get used to, I wouldn't do drama for two seconds if you paid me a million fucking dollars. Okay, but I was addicted to it like you and everything. But 20 something years later, I could walk away in two seconds. It's not interesting to me. I would want the most boring relationship would feel so pleasurable. I mean, you do get to a point where, you know, that repels you as opposed to attracts you, you know, and maybe like you're still at the place where maybe these girls, the only thing they're lacking is like drama.

But maybe that's a good thing for you eventually to realize that those are like the right girls for you. And you know what's interesting when I stumbled upon your podcast, which has to be over six months now. And of course, I listen to your guests. So like Billy and Luna and Venus. Yeah, awesome. I listened to the stories. And that was what I used to do. but in sobriety, I've only done one swing.

It wasn't even a swing. I was invited to a club. And I went and I'm wondering maybe that's the route I should go. Like go to a club or I'm going to join your discord. Yeah, like it's okay to get your like, listen, there's nothing wrong with you wanting that excitement, right? And that feeling of being alive and that, but it should be like a positive kind of up feeling as opposed to. drama gives you it in a negative way. Do you know what I mean?

But there's positive ways to get that kind of up. I feel like once an addict, always an addict. I like loud fucking music. I like things that make me feel a lot of feelings. You know what I mean? I'm still, and I feel like that's the addict in me,

right? But like loud music isn't like dating somebody that's going to be fucking lying to me. You know what I mean? But like it does something to me. Going to the movie like, you know, seeing an amazing scenery.

Like there's ways to feel fucking high and up in a positive way. And maybe for you, as somebody, yeah, maybe going to a club because you're a very sexual person and you're open, like that would give you like a positive kind of feeling of that high that you're looking for and that you like and a kid,

you know what I mean? And then maybe you would meet somebody in that world, you know? I even thought about men, like maybe go back and explore that. Yeah, amazing. Because I don't know what I want. I know I want to be with somebody. I just haven't been able to put all the pieces together.

Are you totally over? But thanks to your podcast. Yeah, go on. To you and to, I mentioned it, I'd love to get on Discord and meet the people. You're going to. Maybe you never know. I just, I think I have a journey still in me and yet to be on, you know, the path yet to be revealed.

Yeah, you need to like, you need to be on the other side of that last thing. You know, you're a sober person. You cleaned up your act. You went through so much. That was a really traumatizing sort of relationship. but I feel like it'll be very healing for you when you could eventually be in a new relationship because you are a relationship person and you want that in your life. And to find somebody and have a really healthy, great relationship will be like the perfect

thing for you to finally close that chapter. You know what I mean? I do think you need to, if you still have bad feelings for her, you need to like get to a place where you could just totally take all accountability for your, you know, part in being there and wish her well and know she's damaged goods and something's. fucking wrong there and move on what your life you know what I mean because you need to get to that place before you have room for somebody else I'll admit to something that you know this is a confession that you probably hear often is that I did manage to get I don't know three dozen of those pictures

that she took of herself they're still on my phone right and I can't bring myself to delete them yeah but you probably need to well that's where I'm going yeah when I delete them then I know I'm ready. Yeah. And that's what's holding that little bit. And listen, I get it. That little bit, even if it's 1% of you that is attached to something from your past, and a lot of times these things that are so super highly charged are the things that keep you attached more than a normal healthy relationship in a weird way, you know? But like that can be very difficult, even if it's this little leftover thing, but that needs to be done for you to move on completely. You know, so you'll get there. I'd love to get your story. I love this whole story, by the way. I love your journey. I think,

you know, we're all human beings put on this planet to have like a crazy, messy lives. Like, nothing's perfect. I mean, yours is super crazy and whatever and messy, but, you know, it's real life. It's what you've been through. I do believe, like, I give it credit to anybody who has gotten sobered because that's a hard thing. I've done it myself. So I understand. So I'd love to get your sober story on a totally separate episode, right? We would go there and talk about all of that. I haven't talked about half of what I Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's a whole different thing.

We needed to get this whole story, so I would love to do that story too. Give a shout out to your podcast so people could go check it out. I'll put the link to it in the description or to your website, whatever you want, you know, but give your shout out for everything now. And then do me a favor. Use the same link that I gave you to a book your Sober Story episode with me, okay? Sure. So the podcast started.

it out as the anonymous Andrew podcast because I wanted to be anonymous. It's now digital dating over 50. Yeah, I like that niche. We're in season five, yeah. But the anonymous Andrews Podcast Studios.com is a website

where I also have two other podcasts. One is about cults, and one is a platform that I vent. And I think some of your listeners might enjoy the last one I just did. I did a review of one of those AI girlfriend websites because they are attracting men in droves

and I had to see what it was all about. You should do an episode on that. A podcast episode. I did. I'd be happy to do it with you because I am a member of one. No, this is all, all that kind of content is great for you. What I want for you is your personal life story of getting sober. I think that's super interesting.

Yeah. But yeah, that's a great podcast episode for you on your show, you know, because that's what you're talking. about now you're no longer talking about you you're talking about all this other stuff yeah yeah and i did i did a review on another the venting one but the main one i'm not sure i want to go there yet but i also admits the things that i don't know who there are still family members that are around that don't know a lot of my personal life and maybe they don't need to know i mean is it their business your sex life if it's about sex and stuff i mean you know sometimes it's less is more

sometimes. Yeah. So I've got to be careful. I'm talking to you, I don't, my son, my sons and grandkids aren't going to listen to this podcast, unfortunately. Well, I could change your name, you know what I mean? But I mean, your voice, your voice.

Okay, and your voice, you want me to leave, correct? Because you're your voice on your podcast. No, I have no problem with any of that. I'm on Reddit, and a lot of people on Reddit know my story and they know me. And I have my own Discord as well. Okay, great. You can put those links in when you join my Discord,

feel free to promote that on my. my but Discord, you can't, like, put links and comments to stuff, but you could put your link to your stuff in your bio. And you're going to get the link to my private discord when we hang up when you, oh no, you're not going to get it because this was a separate, we did a separate time. I'll send it to you, okay, so you could get into my Discord. But make sure, and I'm going to send you the link again to make sure the, you book your podcast episode for your Sober Story. And send me the link that you want me to put in the description for your podcast, whether it's Anonymous Andrew.com or your podcast.

link you know you tell me okay send me an email back after i send you the links okay i'll send you everything kathy thank you this was great i love your whole story yeah all right kathy thank you anonymous andrew this was a fun conversation i could have dug so much deeper and went on for like three hours this is the kind of shit i love to talk about it's interesting to me i would love to come back anytime and i would love to do a Q&A with you. If you're looking for a Sunday Q&A, I'd love to do that with you. Okay, that'll be fun. Okay, cool. All right. Listen, thanks so much for calling you. This was fun. I like you and I like the whole story. My pleasure. Bye. Enjoy the rest of your day. You too. Bye.

Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audio book. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang-being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person. And they're all true. I took the interview

and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format, and finally the audiobook. is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link

from me, okay? I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other, and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of lots of contests where you could win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said.

All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook, or the paperback. Send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast.