Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 362 - Stephanie Needs Way More Sex from her Husband

Episode Date: November 16, 2020

Stephanie needs way more sex from her husband but he doesn't seem interested. Why doesn't he want to have sex anymore? Is he depressed or addicted to porn or is he possibly cheating on her? What, if anything, has she done to get him more into it? Tune in to find out plus hear all about how they met through an ad for a gangbang, whether that gangbang ever took place, what their sex life was like in the beginning, what's lacking now, her interest in bdsm and how being a submissive doesn't help her issue, her troubled past with her parents and how it effects her, her interest in bdsm and what she recently bought her husband to get him in the "mood,' how he reacted to it and a whole lot more.  **To see anonymous pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it.

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Anyway, today I have a girl named Stephanie. Now, Stephanie had the worst fucking connection I've ever had in my life. It's so bad. I was literally, like, halfway into editing the shit out of this episode. I was like, I shouldn't even air this, right? But I had put so much work into it that I'm like, what am I going to do now? I just have to air it. But maybe I won't.

I don't know. If you're listening to this, I'm airing it. But it's really bad sound. I do my best to try to fix that sound. so maybe it's not as bad as I think. I do repeat a lot of what she said, so you know what she's saying. Besides the problem with the sound,

it was hard to get to the point of this conversation. We were a little bit all over the place because she had a lot of backstory. She had a lot of different things that we sort of dabbled in and said it was hard for me to stay focused on one thing, but basically the gist of it is. The big problem is that Stephanie's in a marriage,

her sex life has gone out the window, but when you hear about why it's got out the window, you're like, yeah, duh, they have like 10 kids and lots of history and who knows if he's cheating and she's a submissive and she's got a box of like submissive gear. He's not interested in it and what the fuck is going on. We talk about all that stuff. Wait until you hear about how they met. The gangbangs included in that story. But like I said, there's like all these things going on and we touch a little bit on all of it. The main thing that I keep trying to get back to is this problem she's having with her husband and why they don't have that sex.

He's a lot older than her. She's younger. I think it's a common problem. But, you know, because I'm talking to her, there's a lot of specific details about her issues and their issues together as a couple that go off in a lot of different directions. So, like I said, forgive me if this is a hard one to listen to. I know you're all going to comment. I don't.

Should I air this? I have aired this because if you're listening to it, I did air it. I don't know. Jury's still out for me. But anyway, if you're listening to this, tune in, listen to Stephanie. Then let me know what you think. Maybe it's not as bad as I think, right? I tend to be a harsh critic. But anyway, I'm going to be right back on. I'm not really pitching this one good. So if anyone listens to it, it'll be a miracle. I'm like the worst salesperson. But anyway, I'll be going to be right back on with Stephanie. How are you today? I am a little frustrated.

Frustrated? Well, all I know about you, first of all I didn't know, you know, I didn't really, I tell people I don't like to know that much going into the call. And all I know about you is that you have a fiancé and there's certain things that you can't talk to him about or tell him, right? So I'm assuming you have somewhat of a secret life, maybe, I don't know. Well, it's not exactly that easy. My biggest issues with talking to him, I don't know how to talk to him about what I'm wanting, but I also don't know how to talk to him about, you know, certain things with him personally. like I try to say hey this isn't right and or this is what I want and it's like it goes in one ear

and out the other and right back to the same old same old within maybe 10 minutes to an hour now are you talking about just life in general are you talking about when sex is like are you talking about sexually he doesn't know what you like or you can't talk to him or is this just in like you know what you guys are going to have for dinner i mean um it's a little bit of both okay see okay with him i could be coming to bed at whatever time i decided to stop working at night and instead of just letting me come to bed it's oh would you go make me some room and at 3 a.m. Would you go get me something

out of the kitchen? I'm like, your legs ain't broken. You know, but on the other side of things, when it comes to mining, it's on what I want. Let's say, for instance, bedroom time for lack of a better term. It's

more recently, it's been vacant, so to speak. It's been what? Vacant? Yes. So non-existent? Like, I'd say once two days ago, then once, two weeks ago,

and then once, two months ago. How long you guys been together? Um, since 2014. So you've been together six years. You sound like you're 14 years old. I mean, how old were you guys? when you got together because you sound super young. Okay, I was 22 and he was 30-something.

Oh, okay. So you're still in your 26 now, I guess? I'm 28. Okay. Oh, okay. So you have a big age difference, right? But how was the sex up, like, you know, because we're in the middle of this, like, crazy pandemic.

Like, did that have anything to do with your sex life going out the window? Or was it starting to sort of wane way before the past six months? Okay. Well, when we first met, our sex life was immaculate. Right. Okay. Slowly, I want to say when my fourth child, his eighth child, was born. our sex life

my sex drive has been climbing and his sex drive has been fallen Right of course Yeah his is only going to get a little bit slightly worse Because he's like Nearing I find what I have found

Because I'm way older than you and I've seen You know people go through things And as a woman I remember like You know you start to get really horny around 30 And then wait until you're in your 40s Forget about it but it will increase tenfold for you. But as a guy, most of my guy friends

that were like massive players could do it like multiple times a night or whatever, they really start to slow down in their late 40s, you know, he's 40 and it's starting to slow down. I don't know if it's just because, you know, sometimes I think it's hard to keep sex hot in a relationship when you've been with somebody for so long. I mean, you're telling me he has eight fucking kids.

You have four kids. I mean, I'm surprised. didn't go out the window after the third one. Like, I mean... Well, honestly, our youngest, she'll be three in April. Okay. You're breaking up a little bit.

Try to talk into the phone. Yeah. She'll be three in April. Uh-huh. Yeah. I was thinking, when kids are old enough to have their own room, you expect to sort of get some of that sex life back? Yeah. Because you've had every kid in your bed, too. That's another fucking stupid thing to do.

Well, not like, not with us, but. In the room in a crib. That's something that with our older two kids, we did that with the oldest of the three that we have together. he was in our room for a loving mom. Get the kid out of the room. Listen, let me just, I'm just going to stop with the kid thing because I don't want to get too involved in that.

But, you know, only because he has eight kids, you have four kids. I mean, you're super young, so you still have the energy to blow him. I wouldn't at my age, because I had a child away in my 40s, I was like always at the end of my day because I was a single mom. I was like, thank God I don't have to blow somebody now. You know what I mean? now like after taking care of a 12-month-old, a 16-month-old. You know, the last thing I would have wanted to do was go service a man, you know, my guy.

I thought, but I think, you know, I feel like because I was way older that played into it, whereas, of course, I'm sure my younger mom friends, you know, you had three kids and you were still banging your husband and looking for sex. You know, I wasn't. Until my son turned around three, I felt like I started to get back into myself, you know. But like I said, you're super young. so you could have all these kids and you're still horny for him. Everything's great.

Sex didn't go out the window until like your fourth child is what you're saying, right? Right. Like his side of that went out the window and me, I still need more and I need it from him. Right. You're still horny, but he's not. Right. And now do you try to initiate? and he doesn't want to? Was he always like a, you know, does he just want blowjaws? Is he selfish? Does he want no sex whatsoever?

Because I wonder about a guy who, you know, doesn't want to ever have sex. Even at 40, that's like I said, I have friends that like when they're in their late 40s, they start to like wean off. But it's not like they don't want sex. It's like they just want it once a day as opposed to four times, you know, four times the, you know, jerking off. You know what I mean? Well, this started in its earnest. And, well, as far as that's concerned, I mean,

um, it might be once every two weeks or once over two months or whatever he feels like it. But I'm more of the submissive type that I just,

Yeah. Taking the lead is not really hot for you. You want him to fucking want you and take you like over his shoulder and fuck the shit out of you. Exactly. Yeah, most girls want that, I think. You know, I think some girls like to switch it up a little bit. But most of the time a woman, you know, because I think it does give you that feeling too besides being hot sex. It's like it lets you know that your guy finds you sexually.

attractive, right? It feeds your ego. It makes you feel hot and sexy. Right. There's nothing more unsexy than having to beg your guy to bang you. Like, I mean, that's not, like, you know, that's not, A, it's not hot. And B, it's like, it can eventually chip away at your self-esteem because you're like, why don't you want to have sex with me? Like, why am I not attractive to you? Like, why don't I get you hard anymore? You know, I think some women would feel that way after a while of that. Well, on top of feeling unattractive, with having to get up and make Raymond noodles in the middle of the night, I feel more like a servant than a wife.

Right. He's not satisfying your needs in a whole variety. Like, listen, these are the type of things that are very common in relationships. These are the type of things that, you know, are the business. A lot of times when I hear a story of somebody like, you know, 10 years down the line into, like, cheating or five, you know, it's like when I ask them to go back, you know, these are the kind of things that start to happen way before even somebody that's totally monogamous winds up. Sometimes crossing the line and cheating or going and having an affair because this kind of stuff

goes unchecked, you know. It kind of is happening. Both people aren't really that happy. I mean, he can't be satisfied. What's wrong with him that he doesn't? doesn't want to have sex and that he's lost his sex drive. He's either getting it from somewhere else, and that's a question I have to ask you if you think he could be cheating, or, you know, maybe he's slightly depressed or his hormones aren't really right because why doesn't he want

sex? Is he addicted to porn? Is he getting it that way? You know, what's the deal? When we first had together, we both admitted that we were addicted to sex. You were both addicted to sex. Okay. So that's why it was off the chart. you first met each other. Right. Okay. The thing is, I found out after a while, I mean, like, this was a long while. Okay.

We were talking as just friends. He said, I have two daughters. Then three months after I moved into the house, I find out he has another daughter. then about a year later I find out he has a son then about a year later I find out he has another son oh he has five kids

with other four other women five other kids yeah okay okay so anyway when talking about how these kids came about three of his teenagers

were literally approximately at least six months apart. Like literally one girl born October of one year. And then next girl born February of the next year. Yeah, right. So he's obviously having sex with multiple women. And then the next girl was born in October of that year.

So literally six months apart. Yeah. Did you ever question? him about that? Did you ever say like, hey, I could, I could do math. Basic math here means like, you know, what the fuck? Like, were you just casually dating these women? They got pregnant and they had a baby? Or were you in relationships with them? Like, were you cheating? Did you ever ask them those questions like that? Yes. What do he says? Okay. So he was a military.

If that says anything that are military. Yeah. But, um, Anyway, it's like he was married to a 40-year-old when he was 20. An older woman. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And all of these women came about while he was still married to her. So he was cheating on her. Mm-hmm.

So what I'm saying is like, so to my question, like, would you ever think he was cheating on you? I mean, so now we have the... The question has come up. And he tries to say that I'm different. That you what? Okay. The question has come up and tries to say that I'm different. That you're different, right, that he would never cheat on you.

You're different. It was her. He didn't feel that way about her. That's why he cheated. But with you, it's different. That's the story? Yeah, that's the story. Well, let me ask you this.

As a woman, how do you feel? Like, what is your, like, do you suspect that he's cheating? Or you just think he's got like an, an, issue with a sex drive right now? Honestly, I've leaped back and forth with both. Yeah. Because

even when it does happen, it's not the same quality that it was six years ago. Yeah, but I think a lot of people that are in a relationship for six years

would say the same. Like, I mean, it's very hard, I think, to keep that the hotness of that beginning there, especially if you guys were both addicted, right? Like, I mean, you were like, how old when you met him? You were like 20-something, very young. He was a lot younger. You didn't have 80 kids between you two.

You had what was the most important thing in your life? Nothing. Each other. You know what I mean? Like you didn't have, like, you didn't start your adult life yet, really, right? So, yeah, you could be addicted to sex, and sex could be like a whole night thing,

and you could be so focused on that. But then you get married, you have all these kids, he has all these responsibilities. You know, you have jobs, like you have careers. You can't be addicted to sex anymore. Like, you know, that goes out the window and now it's like every day. And I think it's like it's hard to keep that beginning thing for anybody. Because you're not going to, no one has a relationship that is like going to be all just sex, right? All these other things come into play.

And I'm assuming that you developed all other kinds of way of connecting, right? like the sex was off the charts, but then you became emotionally attached and then, you know, your lives became a mesh, you got married, you know, so you can't say it's going to go back to the beginning, but of course it should be better than what it is now, for sure, right? What are the things that you want that he won't do besides the consistency? I mean, like, there's definitely a lack of like the amount of sex. It's not just the quality, it's the quantity, right? But is it also the quality?

Yeah. I love both the quality and the quantity. You want more. You want more quality, more quantity. Yes. I want both. And, you know, for Halloween, it's just a regular Halloween party,

like something like a lot. Because we're in a coronavirus day, which, I gave him a prank box. of adult toys to you know

sort of try and help our relationship yeah what were what was that box filled with what were the kind of toys you wanted to play around with were they like dildos vibrators

butt plugs like what was in that box all the above and then some what kind of things okay floggers ball guy oh right you're submissive.

Color, cops, and all of the things that you know. Right, including the other things I forgot. So you're like it kind of into BDSM? Right.

Mm-hmm. And so I thought that that would help to you know, spice things up a bit. And? Right?

Uh-huh, yeah. Some guys would be very happy to get that box. Most guys live, listening right now or like what the fuck's wrong with that guy that box has been sitting in the bottom of our closets and follow me really let me ask you this though real quickly because i you know you said you were submissive and i didn't really pick up on that and start questioning you about the whole bdsm thing but um does do you guys get into that early on were you always up front that

you were into that and did you guys you was he like your dom and like that was the way it was in the beginning? I'd say from the second time that we got together. You let him be known and then you got, you were the submissive and he would do stuff to you. The first time that we got together was just straight mission. Yeah. The second time we got together, it was that.

And that really spiced things up. And then I'd say, um, that's a. that side of the sexual relationship, the BDSM, stopped while I was still pregnant with my fourth child. Right. But it lasted through all the three. I mean, I'm a cup, a half full kind of person, so I'm still mesmerized that. You guys were having great sex for three kids. Like, it's interesting that the fourth really threw it out the window, and I wonder,

because it's like one and then two and then three, and he had five others, like, you know, what is it the kid or is it something else you know um well also a just under a year after she was born sorry right around a year i want to say before she was born uh-huh right around a year his mom passed away okay so i don't know if that has something to do with it He was very close with his mom. Yeah. So I was taking care of her when he was at work. But yeah.

Right. No, but I mean, he was very close to his mother. He was still very close. His mom died. A lot of times, you know, men, and women could do this too. You know, it really depends on how you're wired. But a lot of people, you know, death is like really hardcore and hard to face. And, you know, some people can really live in denial of it, right?

And then they just, like, sort of push it aside. And they don't deal with the face. of grief that you need to, right? And then what happens is that stuff, it's like, you know, you can't sweep it under the table and not have it affect you on some level, right? So maybe someone gets really depressed and they don't know what it is. And it's like all those unresolved feelings that they never faced, you know? So I don't know how he dealt with his mother's death or if he ever really did.

You know, you were there. How did he handle it? be still it's not to be the time to start to sort of moving yeah you're starting to I can't hear you for the last five minutes

wait till you listen to this you're going to hear it but I'm just going with it because what the fuck else I was just not going to work to change so he never you don't think he really had a time to really

process it fully well the hospital tried to prepare for it years before she actually left. What did she die from? Did she die of cancer or some along withstanding like disease or something? Well, she had a 10 year fight with renal blood. With what?

Rinald. Okay. So 10 years of that. And they kept every time she went to the hospital to ICU, they would say she's not going to come home. she's not going to come home. So for 10 years, they were telling him, she's going to die, she's going to die. And then, well, she keep coming home

in all those hospitals. And so he sort of, even though the hospital was trying to prepare him for the worst, he was like, oh, it's not going to happen this time because it didn't happen all these other times. Yeah, duh, I could see his point. I see everything from his point.

Like that's, I see the opposite. of what you see in that situation. I see that they were, as much as they were trying to prepare him for the worst, what was actually happening was against what they were saying. So, of course, when it actually happens, it's going to be like the rug gets pulled beneath you because so many times it didn't happen. So he's going to start going by that, right? So I get, he was very unprepared for that death because no matter what they said to him,

it never happened. So I think that that would be actually. actually more shocking because of them telling him and it didn't happen. I mean, you could understand that he would then find it very hard to believe and start to believe that she would be okay because she was for 10 years. Yeah. So it would be like, what the fuck happened this time? You know, why? So, you know, I would, I don't think anyone could ever be prepared no matter what, but, you know, I think he was not prepared at all.

he was actually it was because of the fact that she defied the odds over and over right yeah so let's get back to that box okay because we don't want to bring this

podcast down so you're you know you think it has to do with like maybe he's depressed about that if there could be a depression going on because I just wonder like I said it's like one of things Three things, right?

He could be depressed and not happy, and so his sex drive has gone out the window. He could have, like, issues with his hormones or something going on physically, which, you know, would go hand in hand with being depressed, right? I think, you know, mind-body connection is very strong. Or, you know, he let sex get stale with you guys, you know, something's lacking there, whatever, you know, typical marriage stuff. And he's banging someone else, other people, maybe not one person. and like other people and that's why he doesn't you know need it at home right and it could be any of those things for sure um i just don't know how to discuss it with him well i was going to ask you that too because like do you have conversations about sex and what's going on with your sex life at all ever

uh well i try to bring it up but um i've only started to start to really learning how to communicate properly about February of 2019. And what happened then? Did you start seeing a therapist or something? Like how, like what do you mean? I mean, how did you, how were you not communicating before? And then what changed in February? So back in December of 2018, I decided to go back to school.

to a college degree. And, well, in February of 2019, they gave me an English class. Right. So that's where I started to learn this. Because, honestly, prior to that class, my English test score would have been between kindergarten and a nurse grade. Oh, so you guys could barely talk and speak, like, he could barely speak to you. before that all those years together? I was the one, like, I was mostly illiterate.

No, but I mean, did he speak your language, or did he speak your, so what, do you speak two languages that way? Were you illiterate in just English, but you spoke another, a second language, or what was your deal? Or you were just illiterate, you couldn't even speak anything? Because that's crazy. The biggest problem that I had was that when I was growing up, I was raised in a house with a man who was mostly deaf.

So we communicated with sign language. But on top of that, on top of him being deaf, he couldn't read proper English and he couldn't write proper English. Yeah, I understand that, but you go to school. Yeah, but you learn that in school. Most parents don't teach that anyway. I struggled. Yeah, I struggled with English.

And if I would ask for help with English, you know, my dad couldn't help me because he was deaf. Right. What about your mom? My mom, I got two weekends with her a month. Oh, okay. So your dad was the primary caregiver. He was deaf, so he couldn't help you. So it's not like, because I was just thinking, oh, maybe you're from another country, right?

And you spoke another language and English, you could barely speak. But you're saying you are American. you grew up in this country, English was your first language, and you couldn't even speak that. Even though you went to school and you were educated, you never really learned it properly. Right. And if I would ask for help, I wouldn't get any help. Okay. There was nobody there who could help me. Right. But your, so your husband, when he married you, I mean, did you guys have a lot of, like, when you say you learned how to communicate properly last year,

before that and through your whole relationship was like, was there any kind of communication going on? or was it completely ineffective and just not a part of your relationship? There was talking, not going, but the talking was more on a remedial first trade level. Okay, but how would that, so, but was he okay with that? He wanted me to become more educated, and I wanted to become more educated, and I wanted to become I'm more educated as well. Okay. So when now, so that, so, so what would, what, what happened last February would have been a really great thing for the both of you, right?

Exactly. Mm-hmm. You would think it would. And, you know, he even helped me to try and learn the English concepts that were in the class, you know? Mm-hmm. So that really did help me significantly, I thought. But as far as talking about more adult topics, I don't really do my school.

It was like, it was still a very stressful thing. Because, you know, learning to talk proper English and learning to read and write proper English is one thing. But then translating that into a. or adult context, like sex. At 28 or 27 it's time.

You know, it's like pulling teeth. Yeah, but I mean, I think what you did was really fantastic. Because a lot of times listen, I think sometimes if you really over talk about like how the sex is going out the window and you talk too much about it, it could

actually kill it even more, right? So I think you know and a lot of times maybe guys don't really want to have those kind of conversations you know the last thing you know a guy wants to do when a girl comes and like we need to talk i mean every guy out there is like oh fuck you know they're not like yay let's have a two-hour conversation about feelings you know what i mean like women are very different we love that right but guys not so much and i'm i know i make sweeping statements and it's not true and there's plenty of guys that love to have talk about their feelings you know but like most of the time, you know, so I do believe that you just going out and buying a box of all the things you would want him to use is like a great thing to do, even better than having that conversation, you know, because you're just like, so, you know, I'm surprised that that didn't do anything.

Well, yeah, I was very surprised too that it wouldn't do anything. and, you know, it was more surprising because certain types of toys in that box, I had never used them. I grew up in a more conservative environment. A conservative male, I'm just repeating what you're saying because it's hard to hear. You're back in the fish tank again. A conservative male environment, right? So some of those things and stuff you always wanted, but because of that conservative upbringing, you could never really go there.

Pleasureing yourself was against the moment. Right. So no masturbation. Right. Mm-hmm. It always had to be, if you were going to do something, it would be do it with your partner. Right. But on the other hand, when I would go to my mother's house, she was married to a pedophile.

Oh, God. So that's another I don't know where sex is one of those things It's hard to talk about Well, did he do stuff to you? Yeah, me and about 100 of our kids Right, but forget about those 100 other kids He molested you?

Did your mother know? Did you tell her? Like, what's that story? When I tried to tell her about what was going on with all of us one time she tried to break my arm one time she tried to kill me so yeah

she wasn't the best role model to talk to you about that stuff and when I actually had my dad's and called HHS because of my mom's husband it was thrown out of court because they said there wasn't

to have edited even though you you had you were saying that this is what he was doing to. That wasn't evidence enough. And you had other brothers and sisters that you, or when you say he was doing it to all of us, who was those other people?

Okay. My friend Kevin was one of our neighbors. He's actually dead now, by the way. Right. How did he die? Did he kill himself or something? No. He was killed on a job. Oh, okay. Working for a company called Aquac

back. Okay. But your father did stuff to him? I mean, your stepfather, your stepfather? Yeah. And him and one time, like, we were in a shed together

the three of us and he made the two of us, five-year-olds, two things to each other. Oh, God. But we didn't understand it by the I'm surprised you remember it. You remember it though. Yeah, I remember that in perfect detail,

but I couldn't tell you what I had for breakfast this morning. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. Yeah, no, I think some people, I mean, because you didn't live with them full time, thank God, right? I mean, you would only see this guy once in a while. It wasn't like you weren't living with them at that time, right? Or were you when you were five? Not at that time. I did wind up living with them. when I was 14. Was he still there at that time? Yes. Yeah?

Yes. Did he do stuff to you then or was he, were you too old? Um, he did. And, you know, she didn't even marry him until I was not. But, you know, I get her a look like, don't marry this man. Don't marry this man, you know. And she didn't catch on to that. but he did

because he called me and some of my friends aside and it was like if you try to break us up or if you tell anyone what's going on, I'll kill you. Right. So this guy

that was that she was married to he's dead now when he died in 2018 thank God because he had hurt anyone else. yeah at this point but you know I have a half brother who is currently 60 and you know I don't think you would remember everything that happened throughout the years because he had severe trauma when he was a child that's all another story right for another time and then on top of that this guy had two kids supposedly we all know they're not his some kind of problem when he was a king where he would never actually be able to so we know they're not his but they call him dad in me well these two ladies they were significantly they were more of my mother's and so this guy who's 20 years old older than my mother's and so this guy who's 20 years old are my mother

and he married my mother. I understand another story from her time. But yeah, the way that he caught put it with them was that he was training them on how to have sex. Right. Yeah, I mean, gross. And your mother, are you still in contact with her? She's still alive.

That guy died in 2018, right? Did you tell your guy that you're with? He's your husband, right? husband does he know about all this stuff he knows about it um most of it like there are details here and there you know that you leave out from time to time you can you forget details and then you're like oh i remember that detail i should say it you know but over time you know details do slip your mind you forget to tell people those little details right but he knows your Right. And your mother, are you still, do you have contact with her?

I have not talked with my mother since she told me that Mark was dead. That this guy was, that this guy died. Yeah, I have not talked to her since she told me he was dead. And it wasn't because of that why I stopped talking to him. it was honestly she um she has a whole other story

behind her of things that she did to screw me over and then blaming me for screying her over on something that was significantly smaller things that she's going to be over yeah yeah please i mean this is like one of those things where you're like there there's like a blurred line between a parent and child relationship it's almost like she's the child right but you were the child and so i mean it's there's there's no

you don't even need to look at it like that between you two right i mean you were the child you were violated she was with somebody who did terrible things to you she didn't believe you i mean you're the victim here 100% have you ever been in therapy counseling hardcore anything over this kind of stuff because this is a whole other thing. That's serious business. I've been diagnosed with PTSD. Of course. And dyslexia.

Yeah. But, you know, maybe your communication problem was because you had no voice. I mean, maybe there was something going on with that as well with you. You know what I mean? If somebody tries to speak up about something and they're not believed, like maybe, you know, that subconsciously messes with their, you know, ability to speak up for themselves or learn how to talk or, you know what I mean? So they might all be connected with this whole thing about you not really being able to

speak. And it's interesting that you got your voice back after he finally passed. But you did, right? But maybe that had something to do with it. Yeah. Finally been able to open about it. and I've been writing about it. And on top of that, my life has done

a complete one homeless on the streets in 2014 to be... You were homeless on the tree. You were homeless? Yeah. With your husband and your kids? No, this was before I met him. Oh, okay. I thought you said in 2014.

Yeah. Oh, right before you met him. Because you were trying six years ago. Okay, right. So you were homeless at some point. And then I went from that to today. I am a successful business owner. Yeah, and a mom of four kids.

And I mean, you're a lot of things now. Yeah. You're like a major successor. Yeah, major. It's not just like a little trailer or an apartment. It's a house. Like a real house. Oh, right.

Yeah. And what do you do? You own your own business? Yes, I do. And so I own my own business. I also, I'm writing a couple of books. And I'm, I just graduated my associates this morning. Oh, that's a major.

That's major. Congratulations. Thank you. And, yeah, I've got some online, influencer programs going on. Yeah, so I'm doing a lot of various different things to make myself

more successful than I ever dreamed I could be when I was younger. Right. And with all that success, I still want my intimate time. You want a full, like you're super young. You want it all. Why shouldn't you?

have it. I mean, you know, it's not like you've been with the same guy for 30 years and you're 56 years old and you had great sex and you're like, okay, now it's weaning down a little bit, you know, but you're still really young. Your life is still, your whole life is still way ahead of you. You've been through a lot of stuff for your age. So it really is like, this is your time to be really living it up and have everything be positive because you've been. You've, dealt with so much lack and negative stuff in your life before this that now it should be all great and there's no you know you I think it's you do deserve to have a healthy sexual life as well as everything else that you're having every you're succeeding in all areas right this is

the one place that you're still not and something's like stagnant in your relationship with your husband and like if you actually what occurred only first how we actually got to even start talking with just friends you'd be like well how'd you go from that well how don't you tell that story real quick basically we met because I put something on Craigslist it was an advertisement to And it did a gang bang for the guys. You wanted to do a gang bang.

I had never even had a proper orgasm yet because I didn't know how to enjoy it. Okay. Okay, so I thought, well, maybe that'll help me. He saw the advertising and we started talking just for him. And then he started to like me. a certain kind of way that was weird. Wait, I'm going to get back to this story. I'm going to remember exactly where we are,

but I need to know, did you ever have a gang bang, or was he the only guy that, I mean, because I would assume that if a girl puts up an ad on Craigslist saying she wants a gangbang, you'd get like 150,000 emails. I mean, did you, did that gang bang ever happen? I had six inquiries, and now it's an addict. You only had six inquiries? And it did not happen.

And it did not happen. Oh, wow. Well, you did say you were a bad writer and you weren't really that educated. So maybe you just know how to pitch it because something was wrong with that ad because even if it was like, I don't know, I would think that you would have got way more than you would get 6,000 emails as opposed to 6. So you got 6. He was one of them. You started talking to him. And so you met up through the, through.

list really. Yeah. And so basically our talking was initially how to set this up in a thing and he was going to help with that. Then we started to talk about our personal lives and then we started to develop a friendship but then he started to like me and then the whole idea of getting back to sort of want to do it. And then And he was opposed to me a few months later. Right, but the sex was great right from the start. And did he give you orgasms? Because you said you had never had them before.

Yes. Right. But now when you start together, because he was like interested in a gangbating thing, did he ever want you to do like other kinky things with him? Did you guys like explore different things? Or did you get right into the BDSM things with each other and keep it just strictly you and him?

Or did you open it up at all? or? The closest we've got to opening a relationship of other people is photo. Is what? Basically pictures, talking with people online and sending pictures back and forth.

Oh, okay, right. Just keeping it online, like in, like, virtual sort of scenarios. That's the closest that we've been. come to invite people into our business. Right, okay. And so, he's a little flip-lobbing yourself because sometimes he'll be like, oh, well, I'm all for this, I want to do this, blah, blah, blah. And then sometimes he'll be like, I don't want to do this.

I just want you all to myself. And then, you know, he just flip-lops back and forth between the two. Right. And I don't know if he really, you know, if he just wants to think of himself or if he wants to legislate with other people. Or if he's just saying what he thinks I want to hear. But this was all in the beginning. Well, we had talked about it several times throughout a relationship. and it never went to you.

And then he changes life and say, out of mind it was. And then it'd be like just the two of us for a few months. And then he'd start talking about it. And then it was like two or three days into the idea. I can't hear you right now.

Can you hear you? Kind of. So. Basically, throughout our relationship, it would be like he would talk about that for a few days. Then he would get cold feet and not want to do it. And then it'd be a couple months of just two of us. He'd start talking about it for a few days. And then he'd decide to back out and get cold beat again.

And that's how it just cycled out. Yeah. Right. Now, I know I keep bringing this. back up but like you know because I just don't I just wonder and I maybe and have you you have asked him if he's with other people like I mean because you seem like kind of open and a little kinky like maybe you could be like you know tell me about it like I wouldn't be maddie I don't know like have you brought it up and like asked him flat out if he's sleeping with anybody else yeah I have

Because, I mean, he had to study two months at his ex's house while we were dealing with a coronation. And he claims that nothing happened during that two months time. I don't necessarily believe that because I do know that she has openly admitted that he was the... Uh-huh, this is his ex. And like when he goes to visit one of his older daughter's houses, he'll stay at her mom's house. And like he only goes over there to visit his daughter when he's on a business trip. Oh, he only goes there when the husband's on a business trip? Yeah, so I don't know, but he says nothing's happening with it.

his ex-girlfriend that he has this child with because he's just going to spend time with the child but then like one time I can recall he said he was going to go spend time with his daughter and his daughter was completely out of town so I'm like really

I don't know. Yeah, how does that make you feel? I mean, do you have trust issues with him? Or do you trust him? Like, what would you say? On some level, I have more trust with him. Mm-hmm. But I've always had trust issues with everybody.

Right, of course, because of your history. Yeah. Yeah. But the problem is. is like I have to get back to the problem because I have to actually wrap it up and I feel like we just started this conversation. I don't know. I feel like we've been a little. I'm normally much better of keeping the conversation streamlined, but there's so many different things going on here and we're really all over the place.

So you might have to call in for part two on a better fucking phone line because half of the time you sound like you were in a fish tank. Yeah. I was absolutely trying to get back. Yeah, because like I feel like we. There's so many other things going on here to talk about. I want to bring it back because I'm going to have to wrap it up. Bring it back to the initial sort of situation. I'm not going to get so much into the whole,

oh, I go into bed and after working all day and he wants me to fucking cook him stuff. You know, like that's like normal problems, right? Let's keep it on the sex problems, which is like, you know, you're trying to initiate stuff. You want it to be like it used to be. You know he's into kinky things. You're into kinky things. But he's not into doing those things with you.

I mean, you literally brought him like ball gags and shit like that. Like a whole boxman. He didn't even want to do anything. Something's majorly up. Okay? Right. For sure. You finally have your voice.

You, I mean, I know that you like to be the sub and stuff and he knows that. Is there any part of you that ever thinks? I mean, I'm assuming you're faithful. right? Yeah. Okay. And you don't want to do anything behind his back, right? I mean, have you ever, because that's a slippery slope. Like eventually, you know, if he doesn't ever step up to the plate, I don't know how, like, you know, you can't live like this for 10 years. What's going to happen? I'm not saying you're going to cheat, but, you know, would you leave him? Like, I mean, what would, what, what do you see happening?

Oh, I Wait, I can't hear you. Sorry, I stay more from the beginning You know Right, you're staying with him so that you could For your kids, for sure, right? You have all these kids with him Especially after what you've been through in your life

You're going to probably, I mean, people go one of two ways When they have a bad upbringing They either recreate that same terrible stuff For their child or the more evolved person does everything they can to have the opposite thing happen to their child, right? Like they want to make sure the child has a great life, right? Because they know what having not such a great life is about, right? So you're the good person, the right person that is doing the right thing.

You want to do the right thing for your child, right? The last thing you want to do is subject your children to stuff that like you went through, right? So you're going to try and make your relationship work. But you have to fix this whole issue because, you know, there's a box sitting underneath your bed and he's not interested and you really are. And it's like, you know, you're like really coming into your own, right? And you have all these needs that need to be met. Like something's got to give.

Did you have anything to ask? Like, I mean, I don't know, only because you guys seem very open-minded, the way you met and what you've done and like whether you could go. sleep with other people. Maybe he watches. Like, did you ever talk, have you ever brought anything like that at maybe? Okay. Um, those good conversations, they happen. And then, those conversations make it just die off. Like, well, maybe you need to have those conversations and say like, hey, like, maybe we could be, have a threesome with another guy. And if he says, okay, well, then you, I know you're a sub, but what you have to do in that situation is just take control and go find that other person, that other guy,

and make it happen and then tell him, hey, like, this is happening at 7 o'clock tomorrow, you know, and I'm sure he'll be there. You know, maybe he's not going to put in the effort to make it happen, but maybe you can. That's the only way to get, you know. I mean, because he's not stepping up to the plate. What's going to change for him?

He's either going to go to a doctor, he's got to stop banging the other women that he's banging. He's not interested in having sex enough for you, right? So, and you've brought it up to him. Things aren't changing. You could try to initiate more, right? Even though you're a sub. Maybe you have to do a little switch here and be the more aggressive person. Like, take those toys out, put the outfits on, have him fucking do it.

you know or you have to start being creative and maybe getting someone else in because it seems like you guys are open to that and you have been so make that happen no right hold on that is something hold on that's the only thing i've heard clearly on this whole fucking conversation yeah well not it's been the worst connection ever but you know it's been the worst connection ever but I'm still going to air it and I'm going to have to like give my listeners the heads of. You sound very similar to this girl Monica that was a virgin that I had online. You haven't called in before, have you? No. Oh, okay. I had somebody else on and I'm like, what was her name? And I'm like, I think your name was Monica.

And she was like, I don't know. You sound very similar to her. But listen, I have to go because I have another call that I have to make. And we've had major sound issues here. I feel like this was the most. sort of for me like I said I normally am very good at keeping it on track and getting one story and sticking to it you know and I feel like we've been all over the place I don't even know if you called in with like a specific thought in mind of something you want to talk about and whether

we even discussed it I don't think so probably not because I feel like I've been all over the place thank God you have like a killer sense of humor you know I just keep laughing so that's you know I hope I didn't disappoint you I feel like people are going to be wanting more of different parts of this conversation because I don't think I spent enough time on any one part of it. There was just so many things that we touched upon, you know? Right. You have the whole gangbang thing in the Craigslist. Like, what were you doing before that?

And then you have your whole childhood. Like, that kind of stuff I'm really fascinated for in the PTSD. And then you have this, you know, regular marriage problem going on. You know, you have the fact that maybe your guy's cheating. Like, there's so much. Okay, we're going to have to talk again. We'll see what, you know, when I air this. I have two women I'm taping this week and both of you will be aired this week and next week.

But we'll see what the listeners want to know more on. And we'll have you back on. And you're going to have to get what's up or Viber so we could have a better phone connection next time. Because this phone connection sucks. Hopefully people will listen through the whole time. And we're going to have to talk again. because, you know, I think that there's a lot more to talk about with you. I would just, because of the bad connection, we wasted so much time trying to get a good connection.

And, you know, I just don't have any more time to talk to you today. But I would like to talk to you again if you would come back on. We'll do a part two. Yeah, definitely. Okay, I was going to call you Monica. You're not Monica. You're, uh, what did we call you, Stephanie? Yes.

Okay, Stephanie. Thank you so much for calling in. Sorry for being all over the place. but we'll do a part two and we'll be more focused and we'll figure out like what maybe you know people want to hear or what you want to talk more about you know what would you want to talk more about on that second call um perhaps we can try and get some listeners on how i can better bring these topics up with my partner yeah like i said i i'm just going to tell you that i think you did a really great job in bringing it up by just going and buying the stuff in a box and giving to him.

I think there's nothing hotter than that. I think a lot of guys would appreciate, you know, their girl bringing the fact up that they're not so great in bed up that way, do you know, instead of like a conversation over coffee. Like I think that was fantastic. What you could do other than that, you know, let's put that out to my listeners and say, hey, guys, give her ideas of how she could get her guy more interested. How could she bring it up? I personally think the best way was what she did, right? It was so direct.

It was hot, right? And it was, but there was no response. So now what does she do, you know? Let's let people give their opinions and thoughts. Most people will do it on YouTube. if someone emails me, I'll send the email to you. But we'll also talk again. Yeah.

All right. Thanks, Stephanie. Get WhatsApp or Viber. So next time we talk, we talk through there. Okay. All right. Thanks for calling in. Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book,

it's called Strictly anonymous confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audio. book. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third

person and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audiobook is available. coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint. Okay,

there's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other. And that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said.

All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook, or the paperback. Send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will send you the link to you. to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in.