Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 414 - Kat and Ams are Two Hot Wives in Open Marriages who Swap Together

Episode Date: October 11, 2021

Kat and Ams are two hot wives in open marriages who swap and podcast together and they call in to talk all about it. When and why did they both decide to open up their marriage? How have they both been so successful at it? And, why did they decide to start podcasting together? Tune in for all the details which include exactly how they met, how and when they started swapping with each other and how it led to their ongoing friendship as well as a friendship between their husbands, the “rules and regulations” they both have that work for them, their sex vacations at clothing optional resorts and what exactly goes down there, how they both feel about squirting and why, the best websites out there to find other swinger couples, how they’ve created a very large sex positive community and why that’s important to them, their tips on how to have a successful open marriage, what they discuss on their podcast 2Hotwives (including MFM threesomes, roleplay, hotwifing etc.) and a whole lot more. Check out 2Hotwives podcast here: https://apple.co/3mztQMe **To see anonymous pics of Ams and Kat and a lot of my other female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Here is your host, Kathy. Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast with Kathy. If you want to follow the Strictly Anonymous podcast on Instagram or Twitter, follow the show at Strict Anonymous. Today I have on Two Hot Wives, Cat and Amps. They have a podcast called Two Hot Wives. They also are both in open marriages. They swap together and now they podcast together and they came on my show to talk all

about it. They're going to talk about how they met each other, how and why they started their podcast. They're both going to give their separate stories about how their marriages went from being monogamous, normal vanilla marriages to being open marriage. They also talk about how they met each other. They started off soft swapping, then they eventually full swapswept, and then they became best friends. And their husbands even became best friends. What is soft swapping? What is full swapping?

They're going to explain exactly what when. down exactly what that means. They're going to talk about sex vacations, a clothing optional resorts and what exactly goes down there. They're going to talk about the best websites to find other swinger couples. And then we also get into how they feel about squirting. You know, squirting's always on my bucket list. We got into that. You'll be interested to hear what they say about that. They're going to give tips on how to have a successful open marriage. And then they're going to talk about what they discuss on their podcast, two hot wives, including male female threesomes, role play, hot wifing, and a whole lot more. So I'm going to be right back on with Ams and Cat or Cat and Ams. I don't know which one to say

first. Hey Cat and Ams. How are you today? You guys are two hot wives, right? Is that the name of your podcast? That's right. We're the two hot wives. Hi, Kathy. It's so nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. Yeah, you know, I think you guys followed me on Twitter and then I was like, look, I'm like, two hot wives. I want to get them on my show. Like, what's that all about, right? And a lot of times when I go on Twitter, right, it's a lot of people that have Onlyfans and all this stuff, but you guys had a podcast and I'm like, oh, what is this podcast about, right? And I thought it was actually really great. You know,

you guys are two hot wives and I feel like, and tell me if I'm wrong, that your podcast is geared towards women, which I think is fantastic. I'm sure you're going to get a ton of, or you do get a ton of guys listening to, but I love the fact that it is geared

towards women. Exactly. Yeah, we love sex positive podcasts. Like we're consuming them all the time and just kind of felt like nobody was speaking directly toward women and committed marriages who wanted to have better sex. So there's a few sort of female only sex positive podcasts, but, you know, not for two women who are in open marriages. Yeah. So it's been fantastic to share our story with our listeners. It's really been a lot of fun.

We've taken a lot of the conversations that we, would have privately together and turn them into a podcast. I mean, it's been, it's been a lot of fun. Yeah. Yeah, and I'm sure you get so many women emailing you. I don't know, right, saying like, oh, my God, thank God. I found your show like this is what I've been thinking about or what I want to fantasize about, right?

And maybe they're afraid to talk about it or they haven't yet experienced that stuff. But, you know, your podcast and women talking about it more, I think that that definitely helps women who haven't sort of opened up to the lifestyle or doing anything kind of not vanilla, right? That it will help. Right. Right. Well, something that we realized is that there are a lot of forums in other places where you can talk about things, right? Moms get together and they talk about their kids, soccer games and their school activities. But where do women get together and get to talk about sex? Nowhere. And so opening up that conversation, has just been amazing.

I mean, we've gotten a lot of emails from people who just haven't had any other outlet and being able to build a friendship and really a community around that topic has been just amazing. Yeah, as we've gotten more sexually adventurous, I found personally it could be very isolating. I would have these amazing sexual adventures with my husband, and I could talk with him about it. But he had skin in the game, right? Like he was part of the experience.

He had his own thoughts and feelings that may not be the same as mine. So it was like I didn't have anybody to share that with. And then Kat and I became friends about two years ago. And finally, you know, I had a girlfriend that I could share my stories with and she could share her stories with me. And we could problem solve when we, you know, encountered issues. And it was so liberated. in the same way that your guests want to come on the show and share their amazing stories,

but they don't have someone that they can share it with it, so they share it with you. I think it's such a service, you know, to be able to let people talk openly about sex. Oh, absolutely. Like I always said, like I created a podcast about sex kind of by accident, but I always ultimately wanted to do a show that actually helped people, right? And even though I'm doing a show about anal and cuckold and the Cuck Queen, going to have on next week. You know, it is a show that ultimately helps people. I get emails, hundreds of emails a week from people, not only the people who call in my show and get to talk

about their stuff, sometimes for the first time openly, but also from people that get to hear about those kind of things, and then it makes them feel not so alone, right? So we are helping people. Totally. Right. I mean, when you're curious about something, where can you go to find information and real honest conversation about it? Yeah. Or if you're just a girl who likes anal, Like it's nice to know that there are other women out there who actually enjoy anal. Yeah. And not only that, I think a lot of women don't know how to enjoy anal. That's the fucking problem.

That's what I've talked about a lot, right? Like some guy just shoved their dick inside of their ass one day. And every girl thinks that's what anal is about, right? But if you do it right, it's like the greatest thing ever. And so I think, I mean, is that what you guys when you, because like I think the concept, or why don't you explain the concept of each episode? You pick one topic and then you guys talk about your experience, right? Mm-hmm. That's right. So we choose a sexual experience that we're personally curious about. We've done an episode on anal. We recently did an episode on erotic massage, like kind of happy-ending massages. And we explore it. We talk to somebody who's a bit of a subject matter expert on it. And then we try to create the most sort of female-centric, sex-positive version of that experience that we can.

And anal is a great example because as you say, people don't know. It's one of those sexual techniques that requires a little bit of skill and planning. And if you don't do that, it can be an awful experience. And if you do, it can be absolutely mind-blowing. So we're trying to kind of set out that experience and then go do it and tell our listeners, whether it was good, whether it was bad, whether it, you know, turned into just absurdity sometimes. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, in season two, we've broken each thing into two episodes.

So, you know, the first episode is sort of fact-finding, trying to get information all about it. And then we assign ourselves some homework. And then you guys experience it. So if you're talking about anal, you guys both have, you go both get fucked in the ass by your guys. You're both in open relationships or by other guys, right? When we're going to get back into your guy's backstory,

but then, and then you come on together and talk about it. Right. And we don't always have the same homework. So we have different levels of interest or different levels of experience with something. And so, you know, my homework can be totally different from hers. We assign ourselves homework and we kind of discuss why it is that we chose that or what it is that we want to accomplish. And we really want women to know that they can do anything that they want and they don't have to do anything that they don't want to either. So it's sort of an honest. you know, trying of these things. And if it doesn't work, it doesn't work for us. And we give those reasons why, or we talk about how amazing it was. That's right. That's right. I mean, the big message of our show is everyone's different and everyone's normal. So when Kat and I set out sexy homework, if I have more experience in an activity, I might want to push my boundary on anal or impact play or something like that to a level that. I haven't experienced before.

If Kat is a newbie to that experience, maybe her homework is just having the fucking conversation with her husband and making sure they're on the same page and what they want to explore and what they don't want to explore. So we want to meet ourselves on this wherever we're at and let our listeners know, wherever they're at is okay. Now, you guys are two hot wives. You both are in open marriages. That's about as much as I know about you.

So why don't you tell me a little bit about yourselves? I don't know who wants to start, but you guys figure that out and tell me your story of how you got into an open relationship. First of all, how old are you guys around? We're in our 40s. Okay, so we're in our 40s, give or take. Okay, cool.

So now who's going to tell their story first? Why don't I go first? This is AMS. Okay. So I am in a long-term marriage. I met my husband at 19 years old. So, you know, essentially my entire adult life has been with the same guy who I absolutely adore, and I'm going to put in the ground one day,

and I say that with love. Not any day soon. Not any day soon. You know, as long as he's still taking out the trash. But we, you know, my sexual experience was almost exclusively with my husband, who we call Mr. Ams on the show. And it was good. We loved each other very, we love each other very much, and our sex life is.

very loving and very respectful and always felt pretty good. We have two kids. And like most marriages, when you have those kids that kind of throws, that threw my sexuality for a loop. It was really hard to reconcile being a mom and being a sexual person. And it kind of got on the back burner for a while. But, you know, as our kids got a little bit older, we wanted to kind of revisit sex and not take each other for granted. And we actually had a friend who got like a surprise divorce all of a sudden. And it really was a wake-up call for us. And we sat down in a bar and got really drunk and thought about all the ways that we could like make sure that our marriage was stronger than just being parents to two awesome kids.

And sex is a big part of that conversation. We started to explore all sorts of different sexual things that we could do together. And in fact, we kind of focused more on kink and went to a dungeon at one point and just explored how we could build up our kink skills and bring that home. But it was through that experience that we discovered lifestyle. And we started researching it and finding, you know, sex positive lifestyle podcasts out there. And for any of your listeners who don't know what lifestyle. means it's just a phrase for people who are in open marriages or consensual non-monogamy, right? Mr. Ams and I have decided that it is okay for us to have different sexual partners.

We mostly explore that together. Sometimes we do it separately. But that was about three years ago that we started to explore our lifestyle community where we live. And it was absolutely life-changing for us. our marriage got better, our communication got better, and our sex life went from like 10 miles an hour to 60 miles an hour. And it just keeps getting better. I like, I will have some random Wednesday night sex with Mr. Am's, and it will be so phenomenal that I think if sex gets any better, I might die. And then like next Wednesday rolls around and it's even better.

I feel like it just keeps, that event horizon just keeps pushing out. And one day I will, I don't know. I'm not going to be able to get out of the bed. You're going to burst. But what an inspiring story, right? Because how many people and how many marriages are where you were at, you know, three and a half years ago, right? Four years ago.

You know, before you had that conversation, you know, in that bar, that time, that really changed things. You know, and those people, you know, are afraid to wind up where your friends wound up, which is in divorce. You know, I get emails all the time. And I can't tell you how many guys I have on my podcast. as well as women who are at that point in their marriage, right? And you're here to say, at least your story is that, you know, at that point, you

opened up your sex life, right, and just got curious and got, and that's what changed things. I mean, I don't think that's the end-all, be-all cure for everybody, but that really helped you guys. And I think that that's a great story. Yeah. I mean, you need that foundation of love, of respect, of transparency and consent. It's not a space that I would recommend for anybody who doesn't feel like their marriage is on a really strong foundation. But if you have that, it can be so much fucking fun. Yeah. So it's not for everybody.

But if you have that basis, it's a great place to play. And Kat, when did you start? When did you get into the lifestyle? So my story is a little bit similar to AMS in that I met my husband. in my early 20s, and we've been married for a very long time. We also have two kids, but there was a time in my marriage where my husband was going to be traveling quite a lot for his work. And so we were going to be apart a lot. And we have always had a fun, sexy relationship, very flirty, and we were trying to figure out ways to keep that going. And he actually started sending me erotica. So,

he would send me these short stories that he found on a, on a website called X Confessions. And he would send me these, you're familiar? No. You know the website? No. It's an Erica Lust website where people write in their true stories. Right. And they're short little stories.

So he would send me these all the time and we would send them back and forth. And the stories got hotter and hotter and, you know, we're pushing that envelope more and more. and he started sending me things about like open marriages and different things like that. And so it really opened up the conversation for us to just talk more about, huh, is this something that we think we could explore? We've not really ever been very jealous. I'm sort of a flirty person by nature, and my husband kind of always liked that about me.

So it wasn't like it was a big deal for him to see me talking to other people, talking to men, that kind of thing. But the conversation just got deeper and deeper into that. And then he listened to a podcast, which was Christopher Ryan, had written a book, Sex at Dawn. And it just talked about non-monogamy. And it just, it opened it up for us to explore that more. So there was never sort of a, hey, let's do this. It was a very long, long conversation.

It seems like we talked about it for years. Wow. And then, you know, we finally just decided to go for it. and we've been having fun ever since. And we actually met Mr. Ams and Ams on a couple's date, which is how we became friends. What do you mean a couple's date? Like, was one of you guys on, were you both on a lifestyle website and that's how you met? Is that what happened?

Yeah. Yeah. So for both of us, we were at least a year into, you know, meeting people in the lifestyle community. The easiest way to do that is through these couples dating. websites. Not so much apps. It's a little difficult to get a non-monogamous app up and going. But, you know, a lot of them are websites. It used to be Craigslist, like before any of us played around. But now there are websites that are devoted to couples seeking other couples. And you can put a

profile out there. People may not realize how varied the sort of activity within lifestyle can be. Like both Kat and I tend to like to meet people with that we become friends with benefits. Right. We spend a lot of time hanging out, even our kids and our families hang out. And the play is more secondary to that. But there are plenty of people who are on these sites and they are DTF, right? They're looking for a one night experience where they can have like amazing sex with another

couple and then never see them again. But what you want is friends with benefits. You're not going to want to meet up with the couple that's just looking for a one-and-done experience. So the profile is a place to kind of let people know who you are, what you want, share pictures. And then if there's a match, it's just like regular dating. If there's a match and you figure you guys both want the same thing, then you get together

and have drinks or dinner and see if there's that. elusive four-way connection, right? All four people like and feel some level of attraction to each other. Yeah, I would assume that that could be hard to find, right? Absolutely. What was the website that you guys like? I mean, which ones would you guys recommend to people if they're listening and wanting to, you know, go on to one of those kind of websites?

Yeah, I mean, they're really regional sometimes. So you have to, to, there needs to be enough people on it to find matches. I mean, I love double-date nation because the vibe is very friendly. And the website is just really, really, really friendly. It's really easy to navigate. It's great. Yeah. Cassidy is really good.

Adult playground. Alt playground. All playground. I've heard of that one. Cassidy. Swing Lifestyle. And I even like Fields. Field is kind of is an app that it has a,

a friendly vibe and it's not just like naked dick pics and and you know some of the sites feel really gratuitous and just kind of spend five minutes looking at them and then you're just like oh and you throw your phone across the room um but some of them just have them more friendly like we're just normal people who like to to get a little crazy um and that's the vibe i prefer well and i actually think that a lot of them are sort of moving that way anyway yeah you know the more and more i see of profiles are just people doing regular things. And there's really a wide variety of play styles and just, you know, what people are looking for is different for every couple.

And it seems to me that there's a wide acceptance of whatever it is that you're into, it's okay. Right. Yeah. Yeah, no, I had my Cuck Queen that I talked to today was talking about how, like, she wants to go in and out and she doesn't want to have any kind of relationships, you know, afterwards. And I've heard from a lot of people that are the opposite.

And like you said before, like whatever, it's different, but it's normal. Like, whatever that is for you is normal and okay, right? It's not across the board like everyone needs to be a certain way. But the most important thing is to find those like-minded people because those are the ones that you're going to be super compatible with. And that was the case between you guys, right? That's right. Right.

Yeah. I mean, we've built a friendship between the four of us and in particular the two of us, which has been really incredible. But we've also, you know, we're not exclusive to the four of us. So they go out on dates and meet people and we do the same. And then if we find people that we just like, we sort of bring them into our community. And we've kind of built a big, big community. It's growing all the time.

And it's not necessarily people that we've played with or people that they've played with, but it's people we like. Right. People that we just find interesting and fun and we just think that they'll fit. And by creating this little community that we've sort of built, people find each other too. Oh, yeah. And sometimes you're like, oh, really?

That's four? That's interesting. So you guys are like the matchmakers now. They're meeting through you guys? Is that what you're saying? Through your guys' community? Well, a little bit. We haven't done any real matchmaking.

We just have invited people to join us for social situations that we like. We like them. They like them. We think they're a good fit for the group as a whole, which started out as maybe eight couples, and then it was 10 couples. We've got a party coming up. I think it's 50 couples.

Oh, no way. 50 couples. No, no, no, I'm sorry. 50 people. 25 couples. Wow, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So.

Yeah. Where do you have the parties? The upcoming one is at my house. And we, you know, we meet at breweries. We've gone to concerts together. We've gone to axe throwing. Yeah. All the stuff that regular people do, right?

Yeah. We try to, you know, make it a variety of different activities that we do. So sometimes we're doing play kinds of things, like maybe a hosted party. You know, every regional area has a group that puts together like big parties and curated events. And then sometimes it's just, hey, let's go bowling. Okay, we don't go bowling very much. Well, we go bowling, but sometimes it's like a hotel nearby. Yeah.

And you go to the hotel after you go bowling. But what about your, so your guys' first time that you meet, right? You found each other on that website. And then you were both, I guess, the types that wanted to establish a relationship before you hopped into bed. Like, did you guys do dinner first, go out a bunch of times before you, I don't know, did you guys do full swap? I don't know if you want to, how specific you want to get.

But like what exactly took place? Yeah. So we met on a no expectations dinner date, which is our typical MO. Some people really like to play right after they meet people, but we usually just meet and see if there's a good connection and talk with our spouses. And so that was our first date and definitely felt that initial, like, wow, they're great. Yeah. Yeah. Spark.

And then I'm trying to remember, did we play? The very next day, we went to an art show. We did. We went to an art show. Yeah. Which was a, I don't think we've ever, we had ever done that before where we had such a good time that evening that, like on the way home, I think you guys said, hey, we're thinking about hitting up this art event tomorrow. Do you guys want to join us?

And we did. And it was great. We spent the whole day together. When did we actually play? I'm trying to remember now. I don't know. It must have been the third date. Yeah.

Yeah, because you guys were going on a little vacation. We were. Yes. Yes. So we, Cat and Mr. Kat had gone on a vacation to an adult resort. And they wanted to give us like all the 4-1-1 before we went. We were going for the first time. What to pack.

What to expect. and so it was a great, it was a great first day because I got all the information. I'm like pulling out my iPad and taking notes. But, yeah, so we started soft swap. And, you know, at the time, Mr. Ams and I had a soft swap limit. And, again, for those who don't know what that is, it's sort of you're playing with the partner of the other couple. And sex play that involves everything, but penetrative sex.

You're not having vaginal sex. You're not having anal sex. But pretty much anything else, you know, going down on each other, touching, kissing is all okay. So that was the boundary that we were maintaining at the time. Since then, we have crossed that boundary. Actually, we just had our false walkover. Oh, you know where. It's like a year ago.

It's like a year ago a couple of days ago. So for the two of us, Mr. Amzonite, we crossed that boundary with Kat and Mr. Kat about a year ago. And I still love soft swapping with couples. I do too. It's just fun, prolonged foreplay. There's less pressure about it. But if it feels right and you're viving with the other couple, we will full swap and that's super fun too. Right.

And so your first time you felt comfortable. doing that was with Kat, right? Mr. Mrs. Kat? Is that how you guys call each other? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And because I started with the kink community, which is super into consent and talking about it. I literally called a timeout. We're all playing on the bed. And I was like, okay, time out. I have an idea, but we have to stop playing because I think if you're in the middle of a play experience and your hormones are going and you're feeling super aroused, It's very hard to switch gears and then make sure everybody's okay with it at the end of it. So I really wanted to stop play and make sure if I was going to suggest this, negotiating up, if you will,

that we would need to like stop and talk about it and, you know. Make sure it was okay with everybody. Yeah. Yeah. So that's what we did. And I knew at the time I was the only person who was really holding that line. So I wasn't particularly worried about it. Oh, it was you were the holdout.

So you knew that when you said. Hey, you know what? I'm down to do this. Everyone would be like, okay, finally, let's go. Yeah. I hope I read the room right. Oh, you did. I think that's right.

You did. And how long had you guys been soft swapping for? It was about nine months. Right. It was about nine months. Now, do you guys, are you guys both by? Like, do you guys fool around with each other as well? Is it, or what about your guys?

So the guys are both straight. You know, they're not freaked out by, incidental contact. And I think, you know, if you're going to engage in swinging activities, there is likely to be some level of incidental male contact. Yeah. But they're super cool. Yeah. It's not intentional. Right. It's happened. For the two of us, I think, well, I'm going to speak for myself. Sure. And Kat you speak with. I like the Kinsey scale of describing sexuality, which is like a scale of one to sex, one being very, very straight. six being very, very gay, homosexual, I would probably put myself in sort of two, two and a half

if, you know, I would say sort of situationally by curious. So there have been times where I'm in a play situation and the person that I am most attracted to in that moment is the woman. Right. And I, you know, will kiss. Most of my play activities with women have been from the waist up, but I've received conalinguists from a woman, particularly good at it. But, you know, it's not something that I do a lot. But if, you know, I'll go there if that's what feels right in the moment. Yeah, you know, I just spoke.

That's a great description. Yeah, and I just spoke with a guy. He's coming, his episode will be coming out soon. He's like, he's like a professional swinger. He worked at them at the clubs and everything. And he's been doing it for years. And it was such a great episode. And he talked about the fact that.

because I asked him at the end, like, did you ever fool around with a guy? And he said, no, not really, but one time this kind of happened and another time that kind of happened. And he's like, you know, what I would really say about myself is I'm a hedonist. So if the opportunity arose or in that moment, or in that moment, or in that moment, or in that moment, or in that moment, like you said, you're attracted to that time, like I do it. You do it. You know, and that's why I would consider myself like a hedonist as opposed to, oh, I'm bisexual, right? It's just because maybe in that moment, because you're really super open. And like you said, you're attracted to that person there and then, you do it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Context is so important with sex. Something that seems like super gross if you're washing the dishes can be super fucking hot if you're in the middle of, you know, hot sex play. Right, exactly. It's a little different like when you smell food and you're not hungry, it smells gross. But if you're like really hungry and you smell it, it smells like really great. What about these sex vacations, right, that you were going on, Kat, I think you said you guys were going on and she gave you the tutorial of what to do, what not to do.

I mean, how was that experience for you when you guys? when you guys did get there. Yeah. Well, so there are these resorts that are clothing optional. And there are a lot of folks who are just nudists who just want to hang out naked. And there's a large part of the community that goes to these places that are, you know, into non-monogamy. And they're a lot of fun. You've never packed so much for a clothing optional vacation.

There's a lot of, there's a lot of theme nights. There's always fun activities at the pool. And it's just a chance to be around like-minded people who are letting their hair down and just having a good time. And it's pretty amazing. I mean, Mr. Kat and I have been a couple times before when we met Ams and Mr. Ams. And so I was super excited to tell her all about it because when I first went, I didn't have a whole lot of information. And there were things that I wish I had known before I went that first time. And so I was able to tell her all the things.

And what are those things? And what are those things? Well, for instance, the theme nights, you know, embrace it. Go all out. You'll never be the craziest one there. There's always someone who has taken it way further and you can't hardly believe it. But they're amazing. I mean, the confidence of people who can just like embrace those.

those themes and really go for it is really amazing to see and that you know don't feel self-conscious about being naked all the time because everyone who's there they're normal just like us it's it's not a bunch of runway models all running around naked it's normal people so you see shapes and sizes everyone everyone you know um and and just to uh you know just some little things like the name necklace and just some of the interesting things that are helpful you know What do you mean the name necklace? Well, everybody at the pool will be wearing these little necklaces that they've made like little bead necklaces. Like you'd make it summer camp.

Yeah, that have your name on them. So that, I mean, that's just the kind of place this is, these places are. They're just so friendly and everybody wants to know your name. So if you have a necklace that has your name on it, it helps everybody to remember your name. It's almost like wearing a name tag, but not as. But if you're naked, there's no place to put a name tag. That's right. Oh, right.

So they put it around their neck. So the men wear them too or just the women? I'm assuming anyone can or does. They all do. Yeah. I mean, it's not universal, but yeah, men, women. I've even seen... It's a good tip.

Yeah. You know, it's not universal. You're right. I've seen necklaces where a couple will have his name and her name on each one of their necklaces. So you get a chance to know the couple together, even if they're not standing right next to each other. Oh, that's interesting. And now, do you outsawful? of like, I mean, you guys have such a huge community, so I don't know that you necessarily

would have to go outside of that and tell people about your lifestyle, right? But do most people in your guys' lives know about the fact that you guys are in this lifestyle? I mean, is AMs and cat your real names, are you like undercover on your podcast? What's the deal? We're strictly anonymous. You are too. Yeah, we pretty much are. I mean, people, we're both have jobs and, you know, we have kids that are doing sports. And, you know, we have kids that are doing sports and they're in school. And so we don't really share our identities and we don't. Nobody really in my vanilla life knows about the podcast or about our life.

We have selectively told a couple of people. Like, you know, I told one of my sisters. But it's really hard for people outside of the community to kind of understand in a single sentence or two what it is we do and why it's so amazing for our marriages. And because people are so uncomfortable talking about sex, there's like not time and space to explain it to vanilla people. So that's been my biggest challenge. I would love to share with more people. But then I feel like if I'm like, hey, we're swingers, then it's just out there. And they make all sorts of assumptions that are not true.

Right, exactly. I mean, that's what I love about my show. And that's why I like doing it. And that's why I always like beg, you know, I love when people are listening to my shows because I feel like I give someone the whole story. Not just the fucking tagline. Like, this person's a cheater. Well, why don't you listen to this person's cheating? story. They're not all the same, right? Or this person is a fight. Like, I had a woman on like Big Betty

like is into gangbangs. This woman has like had a million gangbings, but she was like the most lovely positive ray of sunshine. You know, I mean, you could, you know, and I just think that if people heard that about her, right, they would just get this idea in their head. But if you really sit down and listen to her whole story, you're going to feel differently by the end. You know, I have the same problem you guys do with my show. I mean, I've been able to be anonymous for seven years. If you see Like on YouTube, I do videos of just like my torso because I'm like, how else am I going to do videos? But I don't show my face, you know, because I have the same thing.

Like, how do I tell people what I do? If you look at the titles of my show, you just think it's like a dirty sex show, right? But if you really listen to it, that's not what's going on, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I love that you give people that much space to tell their story. I think that is awesome. And it's tough.

I wish we lived in a world that where we could. be super open about who we are. And I think we're trying to move the needle a little bit by telling our stories and not like a super, I mean, we go into details. It can get kind of salacious, but that's not the point. The point is just to tell a story. And I know someone out there listening is like, that's me too. I want to experience this. And now I feel like normal and okay that I have these thoughts and feelings and desires. Yeah. And I love that you're doing it for women because I think my podcast is a big space where a lot of men have found, you know, a place to come on and talk about the things, you know, especially guys over 50. We all were raised in that

generation where, you know, SCX was so fucking taboo. You know what I mean? Forget about it. It's so different now. And I think it definitely, the needle is definitely moving. And I think even in our lifetime, you know, five years from now, it's going to be a different story. And thank God for the younger generation because they are so much more open-minded than people where when we were younger. You know, I slept around with a lot of people when I was young. I had open relationships. I tried all kinds of different things. And I was like the minority, you know, and I feel like now every girl's like me.

You know, I'm like, I was ahead of my time. Like all the girls, young girls are like a trailblazer. But it was just that, you know, when I was younger, I'm 52, like every girl, they only had sex when they were married. No girl had like a one-night stand. You know, I was considered like a whore, you know. But nowadays, girls totally just have sex with guys. a lot of them don't want to have relationships.

They're open to sort of trying different things. People are getting so much more okay with what we're talking about. And I think that that's great. Yeah. Well, and our kids are becoming teenagers. Right. So the way that we talk to our own children, I think, is way different than the way that we were talked to when we were kids. You know, my daughter is 15 and I'm talking to her about sex.

But, you know, she's asking me, mom, do you think I should wait until I'm married? And I'm like, whoa, okay, we're going to have this conversation now. And so, you know, the things that I tell her are consistent with the way that, you know, we live our lives without being, without telling her, you know, our sex story or any of the details there. And then my son, you know, I'm talking to him about slut shaming and about accepting that girls have the same feelings that boys do and to sort of talk to his guy friends. not letting them do those same kinds of things, you know, that we all had to put up with when we were teenagers. So where our generation is starting to become more accepting, we're also raising kids who are going to be more accepting as well.

Yeah, for sure. I mean, I know when my son was born, I mean, I had a kid way later in life, right? And so I was doing my show while he was born. And some people were like, well, what do you, you know, do you feel weird that you have the show with your son? because some of my closest friends know about my show. But I was like, no, if anything, all I'm doing to my son and maybe this is a bad thing is, like,

probably making him like a really clean cut normal guy. Probably reactionary. Yeah, because a lot of times, like, you know, what you make taboo and the reason why so many people are into a lot of things, sometimes is because it's so taboo and it's hidden and it's dirty and you're not allowed and there's something fucking hot about that kind of stuff, right? I'm like, I might be ruining his sex life by making it be like, No big deal. I have never cared about sex. I really do not. You know, and I think people get that when they're talking to me. Like, I don't judge somebody by the way they, what they do sexually. I judge people by, like, you know, how much they lie or cheat or steal or mean to people, you know, that kind of stuff. I will judge someone by, but not by what they do during sex. Like, who the fuck cares? Like, I really don't care. I don't take it that seriously, you know, as long as it's consensual and it's okay, right? So I just think, you know, what kind of damage am I doing to my?

son or anyone doing with that kind of attitude, right? Like what, you know, what you guys are doing is wonderful because you're, you know, you're being open about your guys' experience and also, and you're helping other women. Yeah. Yeah. I think we both think a lot about our daughters when we're doing the podcast, not because they know about it. They certainly don't.

But because we're hoping to help, you know, build a world where it's a little bit more accepting of their interest in sex and not judging them harshly for, you know, wanting to have sex and wanting to have really great sex. I hope one day when my daughter's a little bit older, she has really fantastic sex. Right. And maybe they'll get together and talk about that instead of like regular book club or, or, you know, talking about all our kids' accomplishments and all that. I'm so sick of talking about soccer.

Yeah, totally. And, you know, and then maybe they won't lose that. I mean, because the other thing, because you mentioned when you were talking about as how, like, you lost that sort of part of yourself when you had a child, right? And I think that that's a very common thing. As a woman, I was a single mom, so it wasn't like I had a guy there that I had to bang every night. I was like, thank God, right? But I definitely felt like, you know, for the first couple of years, until he turned about three,

like I lost that part of myself, right? And it's very easy because, I mean, to me, if sex is on one end of the spectrum, you know, being a mom is at the total opposite end, you know? It was like so unsexy to be a mom in those first couple of years because you're like blinders on, right? It's all about your baby, taking care of your baby. And I was always. And you're exhausted. Right.

Yeah. At the end of the night, I was like, thank God I don't have to blow somebody now, right? Please don't touch my nipples. Yeah. I give it to you guys, people, women that had husbands, like people would be like, oh, it's so, you must be so hard to be a single mom. I'm like, I think it's harder to be a woman with a husband too

because that's another person to take care of, you know? Right. It certainly can feel that way sometimes. Yeah, I remember back in those dark days, right? You'd have sex and then it'd be like, thank God. The clock is starting over again. I have at least like three days where I could just be left alone. Oh my God, hilarious.

It's so sad. And I love my sex life now. I absolutely adore having sex with my sex. has been, but at the time, he's just so touched out when, you know, you're like breastfeeding and or you have a toddler pulling, literally pulling on your clothes, pulling on you all day. The last thing you want is like that 10 o'clock paw, you know, he rolls around and grabbed your tit. Like, please, just leave me on.

Oh my God. And you've been listening to Baby Shark all day long. It does not get you in the mood. I mean, it's like I said, it's the farthest thing from any kind of SCX you could get to. Do you guys have an episode on squirting? You know, we haven't, but I have thought about squirting. Because I have a very love-hate relationship with squirting. Can you squirt?

I have squirted. I can't squirt on command. Do you? No, I'm obsessed. It's on my bucket list. I'm like, that's why I ask because I'm always jealous of someone that can squirt. I'm always excited when I hear. You've never squirted?

I've not technically squirted. I've kind of gone whoosh, you know, like a little gush maybe, but not, not a lot. Full on squirting. I'm kind of interested. Well, so I know a guy who's really good at it. You know him too. Oh, cool. Yeah, there's definitely like a certain technique. I don't know the technique because that's not been on the giving end of it.

Yeah. I mean, yeah, it requires sort of vigorous rubbing of the front inside wall of the vagina. Right. Yeah. Like way more vigorous than you would think would be. good. But yeah, yeah, I think squirting is probably something we'll play around with at some point have an episode about. Yeah, you should for sure. Because whenever I have episodes of women that want to squirt, like I hear from, like, because my take is always like, oh, I wish I could. And then when

I hear stories of women that call into my show and they're like, you know, the type that never squirted and then they first did when they were in their 50s or in their 40s, it's like, I get excited because I feel like, okay, that means that it can change for me, right? It's not like, oh, once a squirter, always a squirder. And you could just, if you never have, you never can, right? It could just happen out of nowhere. You know, so that's like good homework, right? Who's the one that can squirt and who's the one that did?

I don't know who I'm trying to do. I'm cat and I can't. I've never squirted it. Right. But no one's ever, I guess, done that particular technique. Yeah. I mean, no one's really tried to make me squirt. Yeah.

What's your love hate relationship with it? So anything that feels like sex through the male gaze kind of just like, oh, it triggers me. And I think squirting is something that makes guys feel like they've accomplished something. And you know what a lot of people don't realize is squirting is not necessarily an orgasm. It can happen during orgasm, but they don't always happen at the same time. And it doesn't feel like an orgasm. First of all, some orgasms feel amazing, some don't. But like, I don't get a huge rush of pleasure when I squirt.

So, you know, it's like... It's not for you. It's not for me. That's what it feels like. It's not for the guy. And that's fine. I have sympathy for guys in that women's bodies are not so obvious when we're aroused. And, you know, so they're always looking for some way to ensure.

that they're actually making us happy and giving us pleasure. And squirting is this big sort of obvious way that they've done something right. Yeah. But it's just, you know, it's not, I was trying a new sex toy the other day and that got me off. And it was like, that feels good. Squirting just feels like, it feels a little bit like you wet yourself. So now I'm really excited to try it. You know, that's interesting because I think I always have wanted you because it just always seems to me that it just so much, it makes it so much more.

pleasurable, right? For me, it has never been like, oh, I want to do it for the guy. It's like I've always thought to do it for myself because I'm the type of person I have one great orgasm and then it takes me like 20 minutes before I could do it again, right? I could never be multi-orgasmic. That's another thing. Or squirt. So I'm just kind of like, oh, these are two things that other women could do. Why can I? You know? And I'm like, I always thought it felt really great or make it, it is a better orgasm. It's interesting that you say that it not necessarily. Yeah. I mean, it's a, it's a study. of one. I can't say, we haven't gone out and, like, reached out to our community and asked the

question, but I know that for me personally, it doesn't feel like an orgasm. It's just, you know, it's like, oh, what just happened? So, hmm, that's not my thing, but I might embrace it. When we, when we, like, jump into an episode and really explore it and put all of our thought and effort and enthusiasm into it, I usually end up having a lot better time, even on the topics that don't immediately seemed super exciting to me. So what are some of the topics? Why don't you just give some people an overview and then people are going to check out your podcast to Hot Wives, right?

I'll put links to your show in the description below. And then you guys at the end, you know, you could give out your Twitter and Instagram and stuff like that. But why don't you talk about a couple episodes or something that you want, that you think people should listen to? I don't know. What do you want to, you could take the lead? So one of our, I think one of our most popular episodes is the MFM 3.

three-sons. MSM being male, female, male. Right. Okay. And so the four of us sort of worked out this round-robin thing where we took turns, having the threesomes. So one would bow out for the evening. Oh, okay.

Yeah. That was a lot of fun because there was a lot of trust there. And I think that those were really a lot of fun. Yeah. So, yeah, that was a great episode. We do start, you know, from the very beginning. with episode one, we sort of talk about how we got into the lifestyle and, you know, sort of our journey story. So there is a little bit of a progression, but we have a lot of episodes also that have nothing to do with the lifestyle.

That's right. One that is foremost in my mind is the role play episode, which I had a lot of fun with because I had thought that it was kind of silly. But I ended up embracing it, and I ended up really loving it and having a great time. So on a Tuesday. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we go from things that feel really sort of fundamental or foundational, like masturbation and erotica or, you know, seduction techniques.

And we also explore things that are really pushing our personal boundaries. So we have an episode on hotwifing. And, you know, we're, despite the name, we don't actually engage in the kink of hotwifing all that often, which is. It's sort of like a woman going out, a married woman or in a committed relationship, going out, having an independent sexual experience. But her husband is participating in the kink and getting a lot of sexual gratification out of it. Maybe he's set up the experience or chose the guy or dresses the girl up or gets to see pictures

and gets to hear all about it. So that's not really typically part of our play, but we're exploring what kind of feels like kind of extreme for yeah we're working on um that's one of our episodes yeah that we're working on is the hot wife experience um so trying to navigate that in a more female centric way you know kind of kind of making it our own because it's not something we really have a lot of experience with at all yeah i've had a lot of cucks on my show and uh this one this episode i i just aired sadie you know she was like the first quote unquote hot wife and she was on with her husband together.

I interviewed them and she, it was her idea. It was something that she wanted to do. And I'm like, oh, this is like a first, you know, because a lot of times it's like what the guy wants and then the woman goes along with it and she eventually likes it, right? That's why, that's how it continues, right? But this was like the first time I talked to the woman that was actually

into it and it was her idea. Yeah. And that's on a always the case. Yeah, I think that's a new, yeah, that's kind of a newer, like more, you know, feminine version of hotwifing. I think you know, if you've Google hot wiping, you're going to find a lot of porn of, like, guys really objectifying their spouses. Yeah.

And that's turn on for a lot of people. And if it's consensual and everybody's having a good time, awesome. Yeah. But, you know, for me personally, that the really objectifying nature of hot wiping bugs the shit out of it. Yeah, not interesting to us at all. And I think that's kind of what we do with a lot of our episodes is we explore them in a way that is comfortable for us.

Yeah. For instance, our episode about house parties. Yeah. We had both been to house parties where they seem very kind of sexist, actually. I mean, all the women are in these super teeny tiny lingerie outfits and the men are all fully clothed. Yeah. Or there's someone who comes and says, okay, it's 10 o'clock. Everybody take your clothes off.

And we didn't like that. So we sort of explored how to have a house party that's, you know, more like a party where you don't feel pressured to play. You don't feel like if you're, you're, you know, you're not ready to go at a certain time, then you need to get out. Right. So, you know, our house party that we had just recently, you know, we have like a play-free zone with food and drinks and, you know, sort of a downstairs with lots of music and dancing,

but with play areas, you know, throughout the downstairs and in the upstairs area where you could if you want to and everybody, I mean, not everybody, but most everybody did find, you know, some fun play to have, but it wasn't like that was the only focus of this party. It was a lot of fun. It was so much fun. Yeah. And because people felt comfortable and didn't feel pressured, I think a lot of women in particular kind of took control and said, I choose you and then we'd go off into a play space.

Right. So they actually felt more free because they were comfortable, right, as opposed to forcing them into it and then they're going to close off. So it's kind of like counterproductive, but it works, right? That's going to help the situation. It's going to get the women to do more. And if that's what your goal is, you know, maybe you get the women to decide how to run it, right? Because you know how the women are thinking.

If you're thinking that way, probably the other women are too. Yeah, we try to not have a goal really at all. You know, the goal is to come and have fun and hang out with like-minded people who want to have fun and do what you want to do. Yeah. Right. Yep. Yeah. I prefer the term open marriage.

Open marriage, yeah. But most of our activities are with our husbands. We're kind of teammates, you know, we approach it together. And I think sometimes, you know, every label has, you know, a lot of baggage to it. And I think open marriage people think you're just independent agents and you're going off and finding boyfriends and girlfriends and that kind of thing. So in that way, we are more teammates and swinger kind of. implies that you do it together. But there's a lot of baggage behind swingers

and the idea that it's all about sex and tea parties and, you know, I don't know, pews in the fondue dip. Right. Or like we don't care, we'll do it with anyone. We'll fight anybody. Right. Indiscriminate.

Yeah. That's really not the case at all. Right. We're super picky. That's right. We're super picky. Right. And like you said, I mean, if you're a couple,

you're looking for another couple. I mean, everyone has to have that spark. You also have to like the person. if you're looking for a relationship sort of outside of that, right? I mean, it was important for you guys to meet someone that you liked as well, right? You guys hit it off. I'm assuming your husbands did too, right? Yeah.

They're really good friends. Yeah. I think they text each other more than we text each other. texting all the time. Yeah, that's great. Like your soulmates, right? I mean, if you had to pick another couple to, I mean, they were like the perfect. And I think that's hard to find.

Yeah. It is. And I would tell people in our similar situation when you're going on a couple's date, focus on the other woman, you know, make a friend. And because I think, you know, we tend to look at the other, the opposite sex or the, you know, the person that we might potentially see this. Right. And we want to make sure there's a connection there.

But really, it's the women who, we're the glue, right? We're the ones who hold it all together. And if we like each other, chances are they're going to like each other. Right. And that's how it worked for you guys. Yeah, for sure. So now, where could people find you? I mean, they could see little snapshots of you guys on Twitter, right?

Because that's where I found you. So why don't you give out all your info so people could go check out your podcast, but also get a sneak peek of you and also, you know, sign up to and follow you on all your social media? Yeah. So we're the two hot wives, number two. Our website and our handle is the number two hot wives. You can find our podcast anywhere you consume podcasts, including on our website, Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

We're on Twitter. We're on Instagram. We have a little Discord community going on where people share their, we're big into cocktails, right? They're sharing all their cocktails at night and the experiences they have and asking questions within the community. So we, you know, if you Google us, you'll find us. So they could find that Discord information.

if they want to join your community once they find you on it like Instagram or Twitter, whatever, like how do they get into the Discord situation? They just need to join our mailing list. Oh, okay. You're mailing. Right. And we give them all the details. On the website.

Yeah. Oh, okay, great. So eventually you should have a Patreon. You should get on YouTube. I mean, you start doing all that stuff down the line too because that kind of stuff, you know, will eventually be great as well. Yeah. Right now we're just trying to spread the word and reach as many ears as possible because

There's not a place for women like us to find this. There's not enough places for women like us to find this kind of information. So we want to be out there. We want to be free and, you know, just spread the word as much as possible. Yeah. Listen, I did my show for seven years before I was like, you know, maybe I should make some money off of this. What is it?

I swear. I was just doing because I like it. You know, I loved it, obviously, because I, like I said, I didn't make a dime. I did do it. It was like COVID that when I got shut down, I lived in New York City. And I was with a toddler. I was like, what the fuck am I going to do? And so I sat up my Patreon.

I did all that stuff now. And I turned it into a little business. And it actually is like great. But that time comes, you know, down the line. But I think what's most important is that you're doing what you like to do and you're doing it for the right reason. You know, my intention was never to make any money. My intention was to help people.

Your guy's intention is like you said, to spread the word to help women. I think you're going to do that. You're already doing it. I think your niche and what you guys do is so. It's like just the perfect concoction. You guys are going to do really well. I hope people find this episode and find you guys, right? Maybe people that wouldn't have found your show will listen through here, right?

If guys are listening, go listen to your show, but also tell your women to go, right? It'll open up those conversations and it helps women and ultimately, I think that'll help everybody. Thank you so much, Kathy. It's such sweet words. Thank you. Thank you guys for coming on and doing so well. I was a little nervous having three of us on I tend. And you look at my iTunes reviews.

I tend to interrupt people a lot. I'm like, oh, no, how am I? You know, but I think it all went really well. You guys are great at, you know, you were great at taking turns. You told, you know, great stories and you made my life easy. So thanks so much for calling in. Thank you. To my show and keep a look out because it'll be airing in the next couple of weeks.

Oh, this was a lot of fun. Thank you. Thank you, Kathy. Awesome. Thanks, you guys. Bye. Have a great day. And when you do, when you do, when you do.

publish let us know and we'll shout you out on social media and try to get the word out 100% thanks so much bye bye bye bye everyone thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode okay i just want to tell you before you go that my book it's called strictly anonymous confession secret sex lies of total strangers is now available not only in paperback and ebook but you can pre-order the audio book it's still not not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person.

And they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audiobook is available. coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint.

Okay. There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay. I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other. And that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook or the paperback. Send it to me at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly

Anonymous podcast at gmail.com and I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strickly Anonymous podcast. If you want to follow the show, follow me at Strict Anonymous on Instagram or Twitter. That's at Strict Anonymous. If you are on YouTube, make sure to subscribe. I love YouTube as a platform for my show because people comment there and I try to reply back to every single person who post a comment. So even if you're not listening on YouTube and you want to talk about the show, go to my YouTube channel, subscribe, like, and share my videos and strictly anonymous podcast.

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