Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 520 - Sam is a Serial NON Monogamist Who has Always Been in the Lifestyle

Episode Date: August 24, 2022

Sam is a serial non monogamist and he's always been in the lifestyle and he called in to talk all about it. When did he first enter into he lifestyle? What exactly is he into when it comes to playing with others? And, has he always been upfront about being non monogamous? Tune in for all the details which include how he met his first wife and how they started having FFM threesomes from the get go, how all their parties turned into orgies and exactly what went down, who turned him on to the lifestyle and what they looked for in other couples, how and why he started cheating on his first wife and how she eventually found out, how his wife controlled the threesomes and why he never complained about it, their lack of communication and how it caused a lot of their problems, the unicorn his wife started dating and how he was having sex with her on the DL as well, the co-worker he had an affair with and how he got caught, why he always cheated and how therapy has helped turn him around, how he met his current girlfriend Erica and how he taught her to squirt, their non monogamous relationship and a whole lot more. On the next episode, you'll hear from his current girlfriend Erica calls in and she does not disappoint. And I have pics that do not disappoint as well. **To see anonymous pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Santerport or Thailand. You can't not do it.

The temptation is just too much. It's real problem. Do your friend know that you're banging her or no? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your freak flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to rehire. your whips and change. Here is your host, Kathy.

Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast with Kathy. If you want to follow the Strictly anonymous podcast on Instagram or Twitter, follow the show at Strict Anonymous. If you want to be on the show, this is a call in show where people call in, they remain anonymous, I change everybody's voice, I make, everybody makes up a fake name and they all tell me they're super interesting. Most of the time, very known. naughty lives. So if you have a secret, naughty life that you want to talk about or you have an issue or a problem and you need help, I love giving my unprofessional help. I love dissecting things and getting deep into it. If you fall under any of those categories and you want to be

on the show, go on to Instagram or Twitter and DM me there at strict anonymous or email me strictly anonymous podcast at jemol.com or go to my website which is going to be redone this week I think it's going to be finished strictly anonymous podcast.com and click on be on the show. If you won't have just like a naughty little confession that you want to leave, I have a confessional's hotline. That is available 24-7. You could call over there. The number is 347-4-203579. It's 347-4-20-3579. The number for the confessionals line as well as my Instagram and Twitter and email and all that important stuff is in the description. I'm going to get right to my guest today. This is going to be part one and a part two because I have a couple Sam and Erica and I tape them separately because both of

them have fascinating backstories. You're going to hear about Sam who's calling in today about his relationship with Erica. More from Erica. She gets into the fucking hot details about their relationship. But Sam had a very interesting backstory. So I decided to tape him separately. He's going first. You're going to hear his story, which is super interesting. He was a guy who currently is living a very open relationship with Erica. And like I said, she comes on and talks about that. But before he ever met her, he was always open and having a lot, like having a lot of hot SEX. He was also a big, massive cheater, and we go into that. But we first start out talking about how he was a cheater, why he was a cheater. He was never really monogamous.

His second wife, and we focus mostly on her, he calls her Pillow Princess. Every time he says Pillow Princess, I laugh because. But you'll hear about Pillow Princess. She was like super interesting. You know, he met her. She was bringing girls home for him. They were having a lot of threesome. They went on to apps and started hucking up with other couples.

and then eventually they got into the lifestyle. She was always really into girls. She made all the rules. There was a lot of non-communication going on, like the opposite. There was like no communication going on. And it caused a lot of issues in their marriage. He eventually started cheating.

She was having a relationship with a unicorn. He was secretly seeing her, as well as having an affair with somebody else, and then she caught him. And it was all just effing messy. But Sam is here to tell you that that guy, that guy that I've talked about on my show, the bottom of the barrel, cheater. Like here's a guy.

He's got it all. His girl let him fuck other people. But he's still going on and cheating. Can that guy change? Well, yeah, because Sam has. And we get deep into that. Like what made a guy who was always kind of a cheater, not kind of, but was always a cheater, change and have an epiphany that, you know, he wants to move on with his life,

but he wants to be totally different. Now, he's not in a monogamous relationship. He's just owning who he is, which is somebody who can't be monogamous. And why can't he be monogamous? Let me tell you, the answer is not what you think. Oh, because he's a guy and he just needs variety. Uh-uh. Okay.

Sam, towards the end of the podcast, talks about the fact that recently he came to realize why he couldn't be monogamous. and he traced it all the way back to stuff that happened to him pre-verbal, like a really long time ago. And he's in therapy for that. But we get into that. Like what did happen to him over the years when he was younger and forming into who he was? Like what happened that made him that non-monogamous guy? I love it.

I love stuff like that. I love hearing that kind of thing. I love that he was able to put that together in his life. And he's tending to that part of him. himself now. We talk about that. And what's great about it is it has a happy ending. I mean, he is in a non-monogamous relationship, but everything is up front. He's having the best time with Erica. You're going to hear about that from her. Let me tell you, and I say this in the episode with him, like, her episode does not disappoint. That's coming out Sunday. Okay, you're going to hear about

all the naughty shit they do together. But what you're going to hear in this episode is all the naughty shit he did with Pillow Princess. You're going to like her. She's like fun. and his whole lifestyle story, how it got messy, what he did wrong, and why he did it wrong. Why was he acting out and all that kind of good stuff? So I don't know, this is like one of those kinds of episodes that I love because there's a lot of layers to it. So I'm going to be right back on with Sam. Hi, Sam. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast.

How are you this morning? I will. Kathy. How are you? Good. So listen, Sam. I already talk to you. your girl Erica.

And let me tell you, her episode does not disappoint. She is an amazing woman. Yeah, and you're really lucky. You guys are going to love her episode. And you guys have been playing with others and in the lifestyle from the get-go. The story

of how you guys met was super interesting. I'm going to leave it to her to tell all those details. But I know that you have a backstory. And both of you were involved in the lifestyle. We've before you met each other. And I know that you were as well. So why don't you tell me your story?

Okay. Yeah, I was in the lifestyle with my previous wife. And it ran its course. We, you know, got divorced. Did you get divorced because of the lifestyle or was it totally other things? It was totally different. It was something other than that.

We were, we started off, our relationship started off doing lifestyle stuff pretty early. She worked in a nightclub and she would bring girls home from the club. Okay, let's start there. Okay, let's just go. Let's get, let's, so, and then we'll get to the point where you divorce and meet this girl, Erica, the girl of your dreams, and then we'll, that everyone's going to have to stay tuned to hear the rest of the story because she tells it really well from where you guys pick up is kind of salacious and then everything that you do afterwards. It's super, super hot. So now, I'm assuming this wife that you're talking about, that you're

divorced from that was your first and first wife, but only wife? Was there anyone before her? I was married. I'm much older. I'm much older than Erica. Yeah, I remember. I got married as a young, dumb kid growing right into the military. Yeah, like most people did back then. Yeah, right. When I was 20 years old, I wasn't even old enough to buy a beer legally, and I was, and I got married. And that ran its course. I was, yeah, I wasn't monogamous with my first wife. I was stationed in Germany and had some affairs. And we divorced once we moved back. to the States. And my thing is I've never in my entire life, I've never been monogamous, even though I've had like committed relationships. I've never been able to be monogamous. And kind of the listening to a couple of your episodes, I kind of had that dirty guy, you know, what is it? What do you call them? I don't know. Tell me. I've heard you the term that you've used for the guys that are the really bad guys that are really cheating, like in.

can't that like the worst kind of cheater guys yeah yeah sort of that was that was me right yeah i always had a little something extra going somewhere you know you know whether it's girlfriend in high school all the way through college and first marriage and even even in my second marriage with my the woman that you played with right uh huh right exactly we both were doing our own shady shit um on the side, outside of the lifestyle stuff. You know, she traveled for work. I traveled for work. And, you know, she didn't do it as often as I did.

I traveled quite a bit, you know, in the United States and outside of the United States. You know, I had a ship in many ports. But let me ask you this, because I want to start at this relationship. So you're this non-monogamous guy. You can't be monogamous. But you're still not in the lifestyle. open about it. You marry the woman that you're currently divorced from, but that you did,

I'm assuming you were with her for a long time. And, uh, you met her in this bar. Okay. Let's start there because she starts bringing home girls and you guys are having threesomes, correct? Correct. Mm-hmm. And then some of the girls, you know, didn't turn into foursums where some of the girls were married or had boyfriends and they would come over or we had very large

Halloween party one year where there were seven, seven women in my bed. all, you know, in a pile with each other. You're kidding. And did you get to fuck them all? Wait, but did you get to like have sex with all of them, seven? Not all of them because some of them were more soft swap. But there was multiple of the seven girls.

I ended up having sex with several of them. And were there guys there or was it all girls and you and your girl? No, it was like their husbands or boyfriends and whatnot were there. And then they had a couple of single, single guy friends that were there. as well. And it was more of a show and tell, so to speak, with all the guys just kind of sat around and watch the girls going at it with each other and just going down on each other and whatnot. And then, you know, a couple of the husbands and boyfriends, we joined in the action.

And at least one of my single friends that I worked with, he got in on the action too. But let me ask you this, that Halloween party, was it set up as a swingers party? or was it just a regular Halloween party that turned into this kind of crazy orgy? Yeah, we had a group of guys and girls that we hung out with. And we rode motorcycles, the guys rode motorcycles together, and we'd always get together on regular occasions for special events, whether it was to watch pay-per-view events or whatever. And one of our friends would post, and it always turned into some,

some form of sexual play of some sort. It was usually at least one of the girls would get topless and walk around, if not more than one. And then a couple of the girls would end up in the hot tub, you know, playing with each other. Just in the middle of the party. It was just, it was always, there's always something sexual going on. It wasn't, wasn't a swingers event per se. Yeah.

It was just a sexual, we never called ourselves swingers. Yeah. But it was just, you know, you know, a free for all. It was just a free-for-all, yeah. Wait, so this is before you're married. This is while you're dating and everything. Right. This is just while we were dating.

We weren't married at the time. So, yeah, this is why I call you the worst kind of cheater because here you are. You have this girl that is down for you to fuck whoever in front of her. She's bringing girls home for you guys to do together. All that kind of good stuff. And you're still cheating on her too? Oh, my God. Yeah.

Yeah. I was. A slime ball. You were that guy. I fully admit it. Yeah. You know, I, you know, I look Erica in the face all the time. And I'm like, hey, I was a slime ball.

Yeah. And that's who I am. Are you still a slime ball or are you? I am no longer a slime ball because I'm not, I told, I told Erica that I am not going to lie, cheat anymore. Those days are over. and that's where we are. She and I both have come to the realization that neither of us have been able to be monogamous

at our past relationships, and we're not going to be monogamous moving forward, and we're not going to hide anything from each other, and we're going to be fully open and transparent. Yeah, that's great, but I would assume that your first girlfriend would have thought that was what was going on with you guys, too, because she was letting you be with other people.

So what do you think, because I think it's interesting, always to hear from the guy that used to cheat, but, you know, doesn't want to anymore. What is different about you that you're sick of it? Was it just too much to do? And it was, like, exhausting or you've kind of slowed down? It does get exhausting, keeping track of the lies and the end of the steep. Yeah. And it feels gross.

Sometimes it was like a conquest thing. Yeah. I got the hottest girl in the bar tonight. Yeah. It was kind of a, you know, it was always. a conquest of a group that I worked with was all very alpha male oriented group. We trained hard, we worked hard, and then we all played hard. Yeah. It was kind of risky stuff that we did. And, you know, as far as the work that we did. So when we had time down, we, we hit it hard.

And we would hit the bars hard. And it was a thing, like, a lot of the guys were married, and we weren't, like, hitting the same girl, but we go out and at least a couple, two or three of us would end up landing a girl from the bar that night. And it was almost like a competition. I don't say it was a competition, but it was a, a competition. It was just a cultural thing that we did. Like a game, like a game. It was like a fucking game.

Yeah, I got it. I get that vibe. You know what I mean? And I think a lot of people understand it. Sometimes it's not in that realm, you know? I mean, this is like with you guys having a conquest. But I think that that's more common than it's not. And I think it's super self-aware of you. And I don't think you would have put that together then, but probably looking back now, you could see what was going on.

And I think that that's interesting to hear, don't you think? Even for yourself? And I, you know, I've, you know, I've been doing some self-realization things. And really looking back on, you know, I've got a young son. And, you know, I wouldn't want him to emulate my life in that respect. Right. You know, he's an athletic, handsome kid, and I don't want him to be that slimy. He's going to have multiple girls.

He needs to have his multiple girls, and they all need to be aware that he's not trying to be monotonous. Yeah, or he could maybe he's wired to be monogamous. I think everyone's kind of wired differently, but I think that if they know the best way to be is just straight up. You took you how many marriages and how old are you now that you're ready to be monogamous? Well, not monogamous, but open about who you are. That would be more the correct statement. Right, exactly. I think we're similar in age.

I'm 54. Uh-huh. The epiphany came then now recently. Yeah, right. Yeah, it came more recently. That's okay. I love that. I think that that's great.

And that's very real life. And I think that I have always said, once a cheater. Not always a cheater, but I think that people don't think that that's a true statement, but you're here to say, yeah, the last guy that called in last week that I just posted Davis, it was kind of like once monogamous, always monogamous? No, this was a guy that was monogamous his whole fucking life. He was the opposite of you. And then he started cheating in his 50s. So many different stories out there and everyone has a different path. But I think this one is always super interesting because a lot of people do think that if some guy has a past and a history like

that, he's never to be trusted. Talk about how you guys got involved in the lifestyle. Your work hard, play hard, you're having all these, or I call them morgies that or fun sexy times with your friends. Do you get involved in the actual lifestyle too? Yeah, we eventually do get involved in the lifestyle. I had a friend that was in the military and his wife stayed with me for a short period of time. We were never involved with each other instantly in any way. There was no attraction there, but they were in a lifestyle. Oh, okay. And she talked to talk to me about it and it kind of shared some of their stories and things.

And he did the same. He was, they had a period where they were because of his duty assignments and what have you. He had to remain overseas. And she came back early and for some medical reasons and stayed with me. And we ended up going out to a lifestyle club in Texas together. It was my first time that we were going there. And it was just, again, I didn't get involved with anything. I was just, I was watching and seeing what was going on.

And then I went back to my then-fiancee and was like, hey, there's this whole thing called the lifestyle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we're already living it. Right. How about we give this thing a shot? And this was the early 2000s and the internet was not as prevalent as it is now. AOL chat rooms and what have you to meet people. We went that route, met some folks, got on a website.

together. I got on Cassidy together. Oh, it was around back then? Yeah, we were some of the early ends with Cassidy. When they first just started. And they first just started, yeah. Now, what were you guys specifically looking for? Did you like to see her with guys? Did you just like to see her

with girls? Because I'm assuming she was into girls because she was always bringing home girls. Yeah, it was more for her to hook up with girls. And then a lot of times it was with guys were being involved. And she kind of ran the room, so speak and it was things were really done on her terms she was a bit of a pillow princess and things were

always done on her terms and she did like her girl girl time and occasionally that would leave the guys out of it because she you know we would just be standing there watching the two of them go at it and then we would just link back up with our with our partners and had sex to you know together in the same day at the same room there was never any swapping or there was sometimes there was no swapping because she didn't want to swap yeah yeah i got it but So you did have some, you were mostly into the female, female, male threesome. Now, would she be into you being with the woman as well? Like, or did, were there any rules or regulations?

Well, there were no specific rules or regulations overall. It was all the case-back-case basis, you know, the way she was feeling that day and at that moment, which at times could be super frustrating because you didn't know what you were going to get into, whether or not she was going to be okay with full swap or she was just wanting to soft swap or whatever the case may be. So she would tell you, like I had a time like, hey, today I'm just hooking up with her

and you can't do anything or you know what? I want to see you fuck her. Be literally in the moment. Oh, okay. And you guys never talked after the moment and like decided to like trying to figure it out. That was one of the big problems where it was no real communication going on.

Yeah, interesting. You know, that was always one of the, one of the issues. Yeah, it's interesting that a couple that would be so open sexually with each other couldn't be open with their communication, you would think. So it would go down. She would, she was directing everything. She was the dom. You were the sub and you just went with it. So some degree, I'm naturally a dominant person. But she just kind of ran the room. It wasn't any type of dom sub dynamic. No, I know. I'm just saying that not in a BDSM way. I'm just saying it in like a way that you're like she fucking ran the room she was the dominant one she was really she was you you had to sit

there and do whatever she said and it was frustrating I mean sometimes you couldn't have sex if you even if you wanted to because she was like uh-uh I don't even remember exactly how communications would would go on an unspoken rule unspoken stuff that went out and you know so you got to have sex sometimes and sometimes you did it absolutely absolutely it wasn't something we weren't a lifestyle couple we just would dabble in lifestyle stuff every once in a while Once we moved to where we live now, we would go to a swingers club here in about 30 minutes away. And we'd probably do that a couple of times a year. Usually we would have already made contact with somebody on Cassidy or SLS and another couple. And we would meet them there.

We'd hang out, drink, dance. We'd already have pre-establish what everyone's play limits were. And we would just prior to going there, we rarely ever went there and just met anyone organically. it was always pre-set prior to going in. And she, oh, that's interesting. And what did you guys look for? What was she down for, or as the couples were concerned, or the women? She preferred brunettes with long curly hair, nice curvy bodies.

She's much more full figure now, but she was more athletically built, blonde. She preferred someone that would match her physically, but with dark hair. Now, did you guys have both have the same taste? Some degree, yes, we did. I was completely fine. We never debated on, like, I don't agree. She's not, we're not going to hook up. with her. If one of us was, we weren't down for taking one for the team, part of the couple was

somebody that we weren't attracted to. You know, we would just move on. Now, I know that, like, so did the lifestyle work for you and your girl? I mean, I'm trying to figure out, because it seems like you have this one thing going on where you're in the lifestyle with your partner. She's kind of ruling everything, but you're obviously okay with it because you're not having any arguments about it, but then you're also cheating. Are those two things going on at the same time? Yes, they are in. personal private time, things kind of really started to cool off almost a deathbed marriage. What does that mean? Meaning we weren't having regular sex.

Oh, even though the sexual couple that's out doing all this stuff, you're not, you guys aren't having sex with each other. Not regularly. It's maybe a couple times a month. And then, you know, then a couple of times a year, we would go to the clubs between my work travel, young kids at home. We just, our marital bed was not, wasn't popping off

and I was finding ratification elsewhere with the cheating stuff that I was doing. So that's when you started cheating. Kids came along, sex wasn't so great there. Or you were always cheating the whole time. No, it was, in the beginning, there wasn't as much cheating because

you just didn't need to, I guess. You know, the opportunity is obviously presented to something. I was still, I was still traveling as much as I was the whole time. And actually, once the traveling slowed down, I still had opportunities here locally with some folks that actually still have a relationship with now, still presented themselves. So I, uh, I didn't, having the dead, the deathbed at home was not as big of an issue because I was getting gratification elsewhere. You did completely, like you didn't have, I mean, you guys obviously weren't good at communicating. So you didn't go to your

girl and say, hey, what the fuck's going on? Like, you don't fuck me and not. You just went and did what you did. Absolutely not. Absolutely. I mean, that was, and that's a lesson learned. Yeah. It's a huge lesson learned for me. Eric and I, we, we listened to your show like crazy. We listened to a couple of other podcasts as well. And we're both entering this with such wide open minds of, we need to communicate the shit out of everything. That's one of the things that we've learned from stuff on your podcast, listening to the Submissive Next Door podcast. The communication piece are so important. And my actual wife and I didn't communicate at all about the sexual stuff that we like, didn't like.

Yeah. And then if you put little kids in and the attention goes elsewhere, you start to just grow farther apart without even realizing it. Nobody's paying attention. No one's saying, no one's raising their hand and saying like, well, something's wrong here. There you go. And then now you're living two separate lives. I think it's a very common story. And I think it's super interesting this part of your life.

Because just like you guys listen to my episodes and, you know, you learn. I think sometimes you don't only, it's not only good to know what you want to do or who you want to be. It's also good to hear from people and say like oh, I don't want to do that. You know what I mean? And I don't want to be like that

and you learn from other people's mistakes. You learn from your mistakes. So other people listening to this will learn as well. I think it's always important to put out both sides of the story. I'm not here to say, oh, swinging is so perfect and it's really great, but I'm also not here to say that it's,

It's not. I have both stories on my show, and I think it's important to show both sides. And what's great about you and your story, that's so interesting, is you are doing it successfully now. And you did it unsuccessfully before. So you're getting a second chance. Yeah, we brooded it up bad. It was really bad. It was, you know, it got really ugly. We were using, in the end, the swinging stuff, the lifestyle stuff became the, you know, the attempted bandaid on our marriage. And obviously, that is a rest of. for disaster trying to use the lifestyle to fix a broken marriage is you're going to crash and burn bad when it when it goes bad how did you use it negatively like how did that play out in real life like what do you mean by that both got into relationships with people that we met at the time and that were that feelings started becoming involved well yeah it's a relationship so it was more

than sex you both started to see other people and you both knew about it that was it was It was part of the, I knew about her relationship and the feelings that were going on. Yeah. She didn't know about the relationship that I was having where the feelings started. Oh, my God. Now, was she having a relationship with a woman or a man? A woman. Okay.

That's important to know. Uh-huh. Yeah. And then we, I had a relationship on the side with a much younger woman and feelings got involved and I got caught and things got really ugly. Yeah. But it's so interesting. why like it's interesting that here she was being honest with you about having a relationship quote

unquote with somebody else but you couldn't be like okay I'm going to I'm doing the same or I'm going to do the same we were both having relationship with that same woman whoa wait did I just miss that did you tell me that wait did you say it was the same woman yeah we were we were all yes we were all in a relationship together and feelings were but were involved. And, but again, pillow princess was running the show. I love pillow. I want her on my show.

Go on, yeah. The third called her. The unicorn. Just call her the unicorn. The unicorn. And I couldn't have time alone. But the two of them could have time alone. So the unicorn and I actually, we had our own little side gig going.

If my ex was out of town, unicorn and I would, we'd go out. we'd hook up when I would leave for work sometimes. I would stop by the unicorn's house for a quickie before going to work. The unicorn was hanging out with us and my ex went to, say she went to the grocery store and left the two of us alone, there would be a quickie. That would, that would break out. Yeah, naughty, naughty, naughty. Yeah, very naughty.

So we both super frustrated because everything was on my ex's terms. And she was, and she was, and she was, she would literally just lay. there on the bed like service me i mean you got to give her fucking credit okay she had her cake and ate at two for a long time yeah and that was the case and at the same time she was really letting herself go physically you know she put on a lot of weight and it was to the point where her circulation was bad to the point where she you know her skin was cold to the touch and i was like just being intimate with you is we had a conversation about that i was like just it's not comfortable yeah you know just even just snuggling in bed.

It's like I'm touching a corpse because your body is so cold. Do you ever feel like you just want to take a break from the nonstop madness that we're all facing all the time? Me too. I know I do. And that's why I recommend you take a listen to the commercial break comedy podcast. You'll hear two best friends, Brian and Chrissy, share stories about their own lives, give unprofessional advice to listeners and discuss really absurd shit that they find online.

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Okay. Wait, so how did, so how long were you guys into this unicorn thing? It went on about a year or so. And how did she catch you guys? Well, she didn't catch me with the unicorn. She knew she caught me with the younger girl that I was seeing. All right. Okay, so when you told me about the younger girl, that wasn't the unicorn.

That was another person. But she was having her relationship, though, was with the unicorn? Yes, exactly. So that's why I was confused back then because there was two people, the girl that you were cheating with, but you were also with her girl. Okay. Oh my guess. Correct. Yeah, it's interesting.

I like stories with a lot of players, but I just want to keep it straight so that I'm a little confused. So you were also doing very naughty things and cheating with her relationship girl, but you then started a relationship. with the girl that you were, another girl that you were seeing on the side. And that's the girl she busted you with. Now, how did she find out about that girl? She grabbed my phone. I normally kept my phone locked and for whatever reason, I know she saw my password or whatever,

but she was able to get into my phone and found the text messages. So she obviously was distrustful of you? Yes. And why? I mean, was that always the case? Was she always, like, thinking you were doing something? Or was it because you were obvious about this one and being slod? I probably had gotten sloppy just because of, I kind of felt justified in doing it because

of their ongoing relationship. And it was, it was very public. And it was, like, my ex, my ex would go on work trips. And she would invite the unicorn to go on a work trip with her. Oh, right. So she was like Polly. I mean, she had another total relationship going on. Right.

Yeah. Right. Exactly. We were like a throuple. Uh-huh. Now, did she know that were you allowed, sorry, I cut you off, Were you allowed to hook up with the unicorn in front of her? Yes.

Okay. Well, sometimes if she was okay with it. Uh-huh. Right. And that was the frustrating part. But the unicorn and I, we were communicating our frustrations with each other. We couldn't, unless Piliprances blessed off on it, we couldn't hook up. Yeah.

She was the puppeteer and you guys were the puppeteer. Right. You know, it was super frustrating. I was at work and I had a. I had just my early 40s, I think. Yeah. And I had a much younger girl in her 20s, who was a former collegiate athlete that just started firing on me both with hard.

And here I am 40-something years old. I got a 28-year-old. Hot girl. Yeah. You know, that is coming at me. And I'm just like, I am all in with this. Yeah. And I was, you know, I was really sloppy with it because it was really hot.

And the sex was amazing. I taught her to squirt. and she was you know it was we'd go three or four rounds of time without stopping didn't you teach your girl to swore to erika wasn't she you the first one with her what do what are you a squirting master i have had several women that are the first time they've ever scored it was with me how come is your dick bent or is it you you do it with your fingers it's it's what my fingers usually to begin with yeah but one and it's just a but then once once they get over the women, you know, like with Erica, she got over that hump of the mental hump of feeling

what it felt like to, to squirt. Yeah. Now she can do it riding my face. She can do it on my cock. She can, you know, and she is a very prolific squirder now. And it's, yeah, we have this whole more strict mitigation thing. We have to put down every time we're having sex if we know it's going to go that, get that hot and heavy.

But this girl from your work, the young girl, you taught her how to squirt, you guys are. Now, how long were you banging her on the DL before you. you got busted. Less than a year, probably six to eight months. And then so your girl, obviously you're being sloppy. Does your pillow princess start questioning you and you're just like lying? Yeah, pretty much. So she thinks something's going down.

Yes. And you're like, no. Yeah, exactly. I had some work in town and she wanted to come to my hotel room while I was doing some work in town. She never, ever would do. I was always regularly staying at a hotel, you know, like 30 miles away. but I had to, because of my work assignment, had to stay in a particular hotel. And she would never try to come and visit me just to even have, you know, nasty hotel sex.

And, but she started at that point, started trying to come and visit me in a hotel and what have you. And, you know, trying to get room number of information, which again, she never did before. So she started to feel like something's going on here. She didn't know what it was, but she knew. I think women have that intuition for sure. And again, I was, I was being, I was being very sloppy. Yeah. And at that point, I was like, you know, I really didn't care.

Yeah, it's like sabotage. Right. It was almost like I wanted to get caught. Totally. Absolutely. Yeah. There's a whole psychological dynamic that I've come to learn about that I've started to do some therapy and stuff on that there's some underlying hardwiring that's causing

that self-sabotage. Yeah. Some of the bunch of stuff. Yeah, that's interesting. I love that. You're tending to it. Yeah. We talk about that off air if you want, but it's a little too person.

there. No, that's okay. You don't have to go there if you don't want to, but I love that you are going there. You know, that's important. And I think it's great that it doesn't matter, I always say this. I don't care how old you are. As long as you're alive, you could grow and change. And I really believe that that's what life's about. So I think it's great that at some point you're like, something's fucking wrong here. I don't know how it played out, but that you went and sought help and you are now understanding where this kind of stuff comes from because it always does come from somewhere. And I think the subconscious shit that goes down,

it's rules our lives and you don't know it. And you don't, you do it without, it's not like, and I think that a lot of people look at people that act out and do bad things. They think that they're consciously doing something manipulative. And a lot of times it's like, you're on fucking autopilot with this subconscious bullshit. And it's really hard to,

get in there and unwire that kind of stuff. You need help because like I said, you're doing it without even knowing, but you are doing it. It doesn't even matter that you know that you are. You still can't stop. You will act and sabotage before you get think shape because it's it's subconscious. It's not it. You can't really get to it. I've had stuff like that my whole life and it's really hard to undo that, but it's doable and it's really important. And it could change it changes your life. And, you know, I can get into it just a little bit. Yeah. I mean, maybe edit some of it out.

No, I'm not going to edit it out. I love this kind of stuff. It's a part of the story. Why would I edit it out? You know, I had some pretty significant pre-verbal trauma. My mother passed away when I was extremely young. And so my formative years, my, you know, my toddler years. Yeah.

My mother was just gone. Oh, my God. Yeah. So, and then once I was like a teenager, a young teenager, my dad had remarried. Yeah. later, you know, probably when I was nine years old or so. So from, you know, very young age to about nine, my dad was a single, single father. And, you know, hardworking man and things.

No maternal connection there. And then he remarried when I was, you know, preteen. Their marriage only lasted about four or five years and was on a school trip. Came back from a school trip. And I was a freshman or sophomore year in high school, very young teenager. I come back and she's moved out. Another person just gone. No explanation.

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Boom. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And this was early 80s. And so, you know, there's no cell phones. There's, you know, there's no ability to stay connected with the only mother I'd ever known. Yeah. Now, she's gone as, you know, her in my early adolescence. Now, boom, I got another ripped out of my life. Yeah. So, and I didn't realize any of that, how any of that affected me until I was actually doing marriage counseling with my

Pilip protests. Yeah. And we're in our individual. part of the sessions and she kind of went down this path with me and she's like oh my god and she's like I bet you've never you know she's like I bet you've never been monogamous with any person in your entire life and I was like and I kind of sat there for a minute and I was like it's like no I haven't really yeah and and she started going down this path of you know talking about all the things with pre-verbal trauma and all this other stuff and and I you know it was a very emotional hit for me right

there and it was but I had no idea what any of that had done how that had set me up throughout my life and looking back on it you know after that session it's it's been one of those things where I'm doing some reading and those kind of things to start to kind of fix that wiring or learn how to deal with the wiring because the wiring is it's ingrained at this point it's just I can't change it yeah but maybe you could work with it yeah for sure and I think that one of those things is like maybe you're just going to be wired to be quote unquote non monogamous and it's so powerful because it was really in your formative years if you can't get away from that and you life is short but you know own it and and you control it and setting letting it control you and that's what

I think you are doing now in this relationship I've never been one to try to make excuses for people for behaviors they're big on personal responsibility yeah and if you screw something up you own it yeah You know, you take that extreme ownership. You look at it and you're like, you know, I fucked up. Yeah. And I fucked up. I'm sorry. I won't do it again or I'll try not to do it again.

Yeah. So you're really big on that undercurrent of the deceit and everything that I was doing for so many years really eats at me. And I look back on it. I'm like, well, I'm one of those, Kathy would call one of those fucking slime balls. Jeannie slime balls. But there's a but. But it comes from somewhere. There's something that went on.

made you that way. And I totally believe that more than anything. Most people, unless you're like Jeffrey Dahmer, I definitely believe that some people are born wired improperly from the get-go. I don't know that Jeffrey Dahmer had anything done to him to make him a fucking psychotic serial killer. Like those are just bad seeds. But most people that are walking around fucked up doing fucked up things, even the biggest narcissist that have no empathy and their total scumbags,

there's a reason for it. I feel for people because of that, because I always believe that this shit comes from somewhere. And I think it's great, especially as a man, because I think a lot of men don't ever want to look at themselves or they, like you, they would think it might be looked at in the same way that it is for women to be more vulnerable or to instead of just being like fucking man up, you did it, take accountability, move on. You know, that you're going there and you're like, no, maybe there's a little bit something more to it. And maybe you could give yourself a fucking break and understand it and unwire yourself and change and grow from it. The community that I come from, the mental health stuff is just now starting to be looked at in a more positive like. Yeah. It was always, if you're going to talk to the doc, you're going to talk to the shrink or you're going to you're weak.

Yeah. Man up. Put your gear back on. get back in the fight. That was, you know, that was always our, you know, the mentality. Now it's like, hey, maybe we need to, maybe we need to take a, you know, take a knee and go check in with the dock and, you know, get your head head examined a little bit. Yeah, because you could have the next 30 years of a life completely, totally different. Mm-hmm. And look, doing the work that you've already done had you attract somebody who is at a different place.

You know, I always believe like attracts like. So, you know, Pillow Princess had her issues. but so did you and that's why you guys met each other. But after that failed and you started to look at yourself and be more self-aware and say, hey, like, what's wrong with me? Why did I do this? And be more honest with yourself and communicate better with yourself. Now you're able to meet somebody who matches that. You weren't being honest with yourself before.

That's why you couldn't be honest with anybody else. It really goes that deep, I think, for sure. So I love we. wound up here because it's so important to know that this is a part of that story. The scumbag guy, the worst of the worst, cheater. Worst of the worst. But I know those kind of people and I know that they have issues and it comes from somewhere and I love nothing better than when one of my guy friends are like, oh yeah, I'm going to go

to therapy. Finally. Like a lot of times it's way later. But who cares? Because it really does make a difference. How long have you been in therapy? I'm just getting started. That's great.

That was what we had to work around us little scheduling thing this morning. And my 10 o'clock was actually an appointment with your therapist. Yeah. No, that's great. But what made you want to do that after so long? Like what do you think was going on that you were like, hey, I want to go have some help. Because you're with a girl now. You got divorced.

You're with a great girl. You're living your best life with fucking her. And people are going to hear about that one, her episode. which I'm going to air on Sunday. But what do you think? What in you change it? You were like, oh, I want to go get some help. A lot of it, it's her.

She's very big on therapy. And she comes from that community. She's big on personal growth in herself. And she does, you know, she's got a regular therapist as she sees and talks to. And encouragement from her to do that to explore that. I think there's never a mistake. I think that as much of. you could say, yeah, it was all her.

Some part of you was ready for sure. And that's why you attracted her. What I remember about her and I think is so great is that it's what she goes to school for. She eventually wants to be a sex therapist. And when they fucking hear her, they'll understand why

she should be one. No, it's not just because she's super hot and does like really hot things and everyone's going to be like drilling over her episode. She's actually a really smart girl and she does really Yeah, she really does look deep into things. And I think it's great that she wants to go down that route. I think who better than for you to pair up with at a time in your life where you're ready to make changes in your life?

And I think that that was going on with you before you met her. That's why you attracted her into your life. People are mirrors for us. They're either sometimes the mirror is you're looking into it and you're saying, oh, I drew you into my life because I don't want to be like you. And sometimes the mirror is, oh, I drew you into my life because I want to be more like you. But people are always reflecting something about you and where you're at, the people in your life. She was like, oh, I want to be more like that. You're ready to be better.

She's a brilliant person. Yeah. She has so many friends that just gravitate to her and her ability to listen to people and take in their, you know, whatever issue it might be. and just listen to them and help them work through it. Yeah. It's amazing. Listening to her ability to, you know, whether it be parenting or dealing with friends that are in crisis or what have you, her ability to work through those issues at different

levels of understanding is incredible. The youngest children to teenage children to adults and her ability to shift gears in a matter of moments. It's like, I don't know how she does it. Yeah. she's got a really interesting backstory. The way you met was interesting, scandalous. Yes, very scandalous.

She's got a lot of fucking kids. She has an interesting backstory. I love, listen, I feel like you probably were ready for a very different conversation. I never know where my conversations, what people are going to go. I, that's what... I've heard that on numerous episodes where you start down one path and then all of a sudden you end up in a completely different place. But you know how I look at it?

Like if I had to create a visual for what I do for my show is like I look at each person as a blank canvas and I'm painting a picture and I never know what the picture is going to wind up to be. Sometimes it's exactly what I imagined in my head. Sometimes it's something totally different. But I always love the finished product. And times like this where I get on a call with somebody like you, Sam, and I think it's going to be all about one thing. But then there was all these other layers and it becomes something totally different. I fucking love it. To me, I'm like, holy shit.

I love what I just painted. I love the picture that I'm going to show people because I think it's super fascinating and it's very in line with where you're fucking at. Your girl's going to love it. My listeners are going to like it. I love drawing people in. I don't feel like I bait and switch people.

I give people hot fucking stories, but I love that I always include this kind of stuff because that is really important. I'm a fucking real. okay I love real shit we definitely love your shows is real it's raw going back to listen to some of the earlier earlier episodes or the production quality wasn't as good yeah yeah but and you had a co-host for a while and it's amazing you know we're the gang the gang bang stories are always a fan favorite oh not just with you with a lot of people those are the faves that everyone effing loves it but I love

that I draw people in with those kinds of stories but A lot of times there's other kinds of stuff that people, I think, learn from. And I don't think that maybe it happens. Every person is tuning in for that. Maybe they're turning in to get a boner. But I think every now and then, people really listen and learn from my callers. And that's what I love. I love that more than anything.

So I'm so glad that the conversation went to all this stuff. I know that it wasn't maybe you weren't prepared. You didn't think it was going to go this way But I love it and I love that we did And people are going to tune in to your girl Erica's episode To hear where Pillow Princess ended And she came in and the shit that you guys have been doing Like I said, her episode does not disappoint

People will love it She's very open-minded. You guys are living your best life. It's incredible. I mean, I am 54 years old and I've got this incredibly hot, brilliant girl that is just DTF anytime, anywhere. Yeah. And it is an amazing, amazing dynamic that we have.

The chemistry is off the charts. We can't get enough of each other. She's sitting by her phone right now, I'm sure, waiting for me to call at the end of this episode or end of our taping. Yeah. Just to reconnect. Yeah, I love that. I know. And I hope she enjoys this episode.

I think because she has her psychology background, she'll like the way it goes, too. because I love this kind of stuff. I love things with layers. And I love your story because it does have an happy ending. You are going, you have completely changed your life. And that is major. To me, that shift in a guy that was the guy that like couldn't be trusted if you fucking paid him.

Now he's like completely wanting to be the total opposite. I think that that's a great story. And it does exist. And I love that that's your story. because that's that is a big shift and a big change it's not easy but it can happen yeah it's it's it is difficult yeah it is to completely look at yourself and to go back and all that stuff that you went through but it's doable and it's to me it's like what we're here for and you only live one so carpe fucking dm like you have been living like your best life in a lot of ways with all these

orgies and everything that you're having but you're still doing that but you're now you're going to be doing it with all like no darkness all All in the light, all for the good. And I think that that's a way better thing. No guilt. It's going to be easier for you because you're not going to have to look back. The only people I'm keeping secrets from is our kids and some of our more vanilla friends. But that's all to be expected.

Who tells their kids? Vanilla people don't tell their kids about their sex life. I hate when people act like, oh, what about their kids? It's like even vanilla people, I don't want to know what my vanilla parents were doing in their bedroom. I've heard you say that many times before. That's an interesting perspective. Like no one, you know, for the other parents, something like, all right, you're going to go bang now.

Yeah, exactly. We, mother really likes it doggy style and she gives good head. Nobody tells their kids that. So why do you tell your kids if you're swinging? I mean, everyone's sex life is typically private and personal. And let me tell you, your kids don't want to hear it, any of it. No. There's nothing grosser or weird, right?

I mean, come on. So, yeah, you don't need to tell your kids. But anyway, thank you so much for calling in and telling me and only less. It's going to be a great episode. It's going up this Wednesday. You're going to love it. And then everyone's going to hear from Erica. So you guys are going to hear both your episodes in the next week.

So thanks so much. Great. Thank you. Thanks, Sam. Bye. Hi, everyone. Thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode. If you want to follow the show, follow me at Strict Anonymous on Instagram.

Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of, Total Strangers is now available not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story.

There's a cuck story. There's a gang-bang girl story. Like I said, 17 stories, and they're all told in the third person, and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person, and I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right?

But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two, and then skip a little. around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format, and finally, the audiobook is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting

the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. everybody shares content with each other and that's what you get to do there you can post your own pictures and videos there's tons of channels we have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money it's a super fun place to be it's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it i will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my discord it's private like i said all you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase whether you did the audiobook the ebook or the paperback send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's Strictly Anonymous Podcasts at gmail.com.

And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. Or Twitter that's at Strict Anonymous. If you are on YouTube, make sure to subscribe. I love YouTube as a platform for my show because people comment there. and I try to reply back to every single person who post a comment. So even if you're not listening on YouTube and you want to talk about the show, go to my YouTube channel,

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