Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 521 - Fetish Fridays: John is Obsessed with Facesitting and More

Episode Date: August 26, 2022

John is obsessed with face sitting and more and he called in to talk all about it. When did he first realize he was obsessed with going down on women? When did the whole bondage thing come into play as well? And, what kind of other fetishes he into? Tune in for all the details which include how his first orgasm was from a pair of pantyhose, how he then started to cross dress, how a lingerie set brought back his interest in cross dressing, how he told his wife about his fetishes and how she felt about it, how she could only get off through oral sex, how he found out his ex wife was cheating on him throughout their marriage, how and why he is not cheating on his current wife, the two sisters he slept with, where he goes to find women to engage in facesitting, how he enjoys bondage as well, how he once used a “milking machine” for an hour, the feelings he’s developing for one of the women he is cheating on his wife with and a whole lot more. **To see anonymous pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Santa Port or Thailand. You can't not do it.

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subscribe to my show. If you love my show, give me a great review. I love reading reviews and hearing from my listeners. And that's also what YouTube is about. You can follow me over on YouTube and comment on the show. It's strictly anonymous podcast. I'm there too. Now, this is Fetish Fridays. I love Fetish Fridays. I started it a couple months back because there's a lot of crazy fetishes out there. So I dedicate every other Friday to one specific fetish. Today it's going to be face sitting. Okay. But he also has like a cross-dressing fetish. He has a lot of fetishes that he discusses on this. But we mostly focus on the face sitting, the bondage face sitting. He's really into that. We talk about where he thinks that might come from or I kind of put it together because he is very into going down on women.

His first wife comes into play with all of that. He has a first wife who actually cheated on him and why she cheated and how he found out. And like I said, we also hit on his cross-dressing a little bit and how he was open and honest about that with his wife. He talks about how he was dating two sisters and then all the cheating he was doing, which is kind of interesting because somebody cheated on him. And then he winds up becoming the cheater himself. We talk about that. He is totally obsessed with going down on women. Like I said, that's his fetish, quote unquote. I talk about where I think it might come from after hearing his whole story.

You might draw the same conclusion or think I'm fucking nuts, whichever that is, you could go to YouTube and tell me, because I love discussing my episodes over there. But anyway, and he's also currently cheating. Okay, he's still doing the face sitting and all this stuff. And like I said, he's now the cheater. And he's cheating with all these people including somebody, who's kind of close with him and connected in a familial way.

Is that a correct word? Is that the right way? Who's connected to him in a very close way. And he's starting, I'm sorry, but I think he's starting to have an affair with this one. But he's also cheating with all these others. And he's into bondage and he talks about a milking machine and all kinds of good stuff. This one has so much in it. It's super interesting.

So I'm going to get right to it and be right back on with John. Hi, John. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast. How are you today? I'm doing great. So listen, John, you have, I don't know if you call it a fetish. You have like an obsession. I don't know what the right word is.

You're going to tell me what it is. But I have to say that when I first started my show like eight years ago, the first time I put out a Craigslist ad, I got back. I always say like, oh, it was like hitting gold. I put out an ad. And I got like 10 emails with all these guys with these crazy sex problems that they wanted to talk about. And one of them was like I could only get off with going down on girls. Like he was obsessed with going down on girls. And you were like literally in eight years the only other person who has emailed me to talk about that.

And that is like your thing. I don't know if that's the only thing you could get off on. I mean, that's what issue he had actually when he called. But I know that you have like an obsession. What do you call it with going down on women? I would say it's probably an obsession. Anytime like most guys, they see attractive women and their goal is to actually have sex with them.

But when I see a woman that I find attractive, the first thing that comes to my mind is I wonder what she tastes like. Right. Okay. And I mean, it's not the only way I get off, but it is definitely like my first goal is to go down on them. And do you go down a lot of girls? Are you married? I am married now.

I've kind of slowed down a little bit in the last year. I've probably only been with like five women. Oh, so you're, oh, okay. So it is a little bit of an obsession because, I don't know, a obsession addiction, because it sounds like you can't control it. in that you go behind your wife's back and do this, or is she down with you going and down on other women while you're married? Oh, no, I go behind her back.

She doesn't move. Right. So you're so taken by the tastes of women that when you see one that you have to have and all stars align, you go down on her. Right. Yeah. It's crazy. It's not the only issue or fetish I really have.

Yeah. I'm big into bondage and, and face sitting and my first actual orgasm was caused from pantyhoes. Oh, wow. Interesting. Okay. Yeah. So, of course, that's evolved.

But yeah, I'm the whole book full. And the bondage thing, I think the bondage thing really started when I was a kid. My stepmom actually tied me up with duct tape as a prank. Okay. And I enjoyed it. Yeah, I got to tell you something. Like, I think that those little things, sometimes you could see like a little kid

have an interest in certain things when they're very little that are, of course, aren't sexual because you're not a sexual being at that age. There's no way you were a sexual being and your aunt did that to you. She did it like for it to be funny. You're a little kid. I have a little boy.

I get it. But if you're into that and then later on, you start doing it and you get this one of these orgasms by accident, you know, happens when you're super young. I mean, the wind blows and you get an orgasm. You start to form connections. And then now you have this thing where you put on panty hose or you get tied up and you're hard. Yeah, I mean, I wear panty hose from time to time.

I love the way they feel. I wear women's panties. Did I lose you? No, I'm just listening. Okay, okay. I'm such an interrupt. It just went so quiet. Oh, no, no, no.

I'm just listening. Okay. Yeah, I actually went and bought a brand new set of earbuds for this. call and I didn't know if my phone tried to connect to my old ones or not. Just keep talking. But yeah, I mean, like I said, I'll wear panty hose from time to time. And my wife knows about it. My wife knows about the panty hose.

I'll wear panties. I even like the cross dress sometimes at home in the bedroom. My wife knows, but the kids don't know. I don't think the kids need to know about that. No, no, no. And I actually, I have breast forms. That all started. what I had ordered something from Adam and Eve and they sent a surprise free gift and it was a lingerie set.

And I had cross-dressed before when I was younger with like my stepmom's clothes and stuff like that. But I kind of left it alone and dropped it pretty much. And the surprise gift in the Adam and Eve set was a lingerie. Ray set, it had a garter and I can't remember what the name of it is, but there's actual name of style, but it had a garter and hose the tie highs. And I went to sleep and I don't know if I was sleepwalking or if I woke up and decided I wanted to try it all, but I woke up the next morning wearing it. And you don't remember how you got to wear it?

No, I do not remember putting it on at all. That's a little interesting. I mean, were you drinking? I had had a few drinks, but only like two or three. It's interesting that you blocked it out of your memory. Well, I have been known to wake up and do stuff when I'm half asleep and not remember it. Oh, interesting. Okay. I guess it's almost like sleepwalking, but not quite that bad.

Yeah. I don't walk around the house and do stuff. It's usually just right here in the bedroom or something. Mm-hmm. But yeah, I woke up wearing that outfit, and my wife didn't see it. She got out of the bed and went out in the living room, and I woke up under my own blanket. And I was like, wow, what's going on? That's a little funny.

Yeah, that's interesting. So, I mean, it really aroused me. And I woke up. I got up, got moving around, got changed and everything. And then I asked my wife, I was like, did you happen to look under the blanket or see me this morning? She was like, no, why? I was just curious. You know, I didn't want to tell her why.

I didn't know if she had seen it. I assumed if she had seen that she would have said something, but she didn't say anything. You obviously did this in the middle of the night, right? Yes, it was. It was later in the night. She was already asleep. I don't know how I didn't wake her up. She's such a light sleeper, but eventually later on in the day, I told her about it. Because I kind of thought it was funny, the more I thought about it. And I told her that how I woke up so aroused and how comfortable it felt. And how when I was younger, I used to like to play with women's underwear and stuff like. that. And she told me, you know, if something you like doing, you can do it. I mean, she doesn't have a problem with it. That's cool. It kind of surprised me, but she's real leadback. And that's how the cross-dressing really started. But my obsession would go and down on women, I think, really started with my first wife, because I was a virgin when her and I got together. But no matter how much sex we

had. She could never orgasm. She had told me that she had been with like two other people and she had never orgasm. She was the type of woman that couldn't orgasm from penetration. So I would start going down on her and it was like a challenge. I wanted to make her orgasm. Yeah. And the first time she orgasm, she said it was so intense that she didn't even even know where she was at. I mean, it was, it was amazing. She had squirted. She had, I mean, she had just let go. So from then on, it was like a challenge to try to get her to that point. And it just became so much fun. And I love the taste. I really do. I love the taste of the woman. So now, you know, anytime I see a woman, that's that I'm attracted to, that is what

I'd love to taste her. Just really enjoy doing it. But, I mean, when did it start? Were you always kind of a cheater? Or is it when you got really into this going down thing that you felt like you couldn't control yourself and you were going and seeing women behind her back? Or do you just see women behind her back? You would do it regardless.

I think the going and seeing women behind my wife's back really started at the end of my first marriage. Mm-hmm. Because I had been the most faithful. I had never messed around. I mean, sure, I would look, but I would never cheat on my woman. Interesting. And after we divorced, I learned from several people that my wife was just cheating all the time with several different people. Oh, you mean your first wife.

Right. You found out after the fact, you guys have finally, you had split up already, but you found out that she was cheating the whole time you were with her. Right. Yeah, that's kind of, that's going to fuck you up. And it kind of, it kind of broke me. You know, the whole commitment thing. The woman that I'm actually married to right now, I was, I worked with her sister. And her sister and I would hang out after work and we were actually having sex and having a good time.

And then she, but she didn't want a relationship. She just wanted the fun, which was fine with me at the time because me and my wife had just split up. And I told her, I'm the type of person. I really need to be in a relationship, which I think most guys are. most guys need a partner to kind of ground them. And I'm kind of like that type of person. But she introduced me to her sister. Her sister and I started hanging out and, you know, doing the same thing.

And then she popped up pregnant. So we moved in together because I wanted to make sure I took care of my child. I'm not a deadbeat dad. Yeah. And it was a really. Originally, me just messing with the two sisters. Now, the one that I got pregnant did not know that I was sexually active with the other one. Oh, but the first one, the one you were initially with, she knew?

Yes. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Matter of fact, when my wife now was in the hospital having my daughter, of course, I was there when my daughter was born. But when I had to come back to work, I was. I was actually staying at her sister's house and being sexually active. But eventually that stopped. Did this wife ever find out that you were ever hooked up with her sister or never?

Oh, no. Okay, go on. It makes it really fun at family activities too. Yeah, oh my goodness. Okay, so you're hooking up with the other sister. That eventually went away. but you at some point you find out that your wife your ex-wife was cheating on you and that somehow leads to you cheating on your new wife yes well we just recently got married like three weeks ago we were just aiding okay but anyway you're still cheating whatever right so

right yeah i've only been one person since we've been married other than her yeah but no so go on so but how how does one tie into the other because that's how you started out the story that you were Oh, you were never a cheater. I think it's really interesting that some guy who was always so faithful, his whole life was not a cheater at all, finds out that his ex cheated after the fact, but it totally rocks his world. And then he starts cheating.

That's like, that to me is interesting. Like I just wanted to find out more about that. Like why and when did you start cheating on her? I know you were just dating her at the time, but here you are now in a relationship. When do you find out that your ex-wife cheat on you? And how did you find out? It was right at the time that we were splitting up.

Okay. Because people that knew me, that knew her, had actually, one guy had actually come up to me at a gas pump at a gas station and asked me, she was like, or he was like, or you finally getting a divorce from so-and-so, I don't want to say it mean. And I was like, yes, we're getting separated. And he was like, well, was it because she was cheating? I was like, no, that's not the reason we're getting divorced. But, I mean, do you know something that I don't know? And he's like, well, she's always at the bar by herself because I work night shift. So I was never home at night.

But he was like, well, she's always in the bar and she's always hanging on somebody different. Well, come to find out, she had been slipping out and going to. into their house and some of them she actually brought home and and cheated in our bed. But yeah, once I started finding out about it and then the kids, I got two sons with her and they started telling me that she would actually take them over to male friends houses and they would go in another room. It was crazy. I mean, it really, it blew my mind because I never even really really.

expect. Yeah, I had, I mean, I had an experience at a very young age of one of my boyfriends at. I mean, he just looked me in the face every day and I just thought he was like obsessed with me. And it turned out like he was just like a massive cheater. And you just, when the rug is pulled from under you like that, when you really have zero knowledge, it's, it's really fucked up. Right. And because of the way I was introduced to my wife now through her sister. I mean, if you want to get down the brass tax, I've been cheating on her ever since we first got together.

Right, because you were still with her sister and she had no idea. Right. But, I mean, mostly it's just because I want to go down on different women. It's not even about the penetration, about the climax. And, you know, it's, it's, I just love the taste of different women. Right, but I did ask you, I did sit at the question I asked you, and this is why we're like down this path right here, as I said to you, do you cheat because you're always a cheater and that's who you were? Or because you're so, you're so addicted to sort of going down on women that you have to. And you brought up, oh, I was always super faithful until my wife, my ex-wife, I think.

she cheated. So is it tied to that or is it tied to the fact that you are obsessed with going down on women? Maybe, listen, I'm going to really, I'm going to do a really weird far stretch analysis that maybe, because it was your first wife that you had to prove yourself for. She couldn't come. You had to prove yourself and make her come. Like that was like your. thing. That's how you got addicted to it. And then you find out that bitch was fucking everybody around. So I feel like maybe on some

level you would still have a part of you was like that was still trying to prove something. So maybe all these other women that you're going down on, the obsession is most is still, is maybe tied to that story. Somehow in a weird way. Do you know what I'm saying?

It could be, but with my ex-wife, whenever I found out, she was cheating. I think kind of ruined the whole idea of monogamy. No, it just, it's not so much that I can't control it. It's just that I really enjoy it. And I really don't even seek out other women. It just kind of happens.

I don't know how to explain it. It is strange. It is really strange because it never in my life, I guess, I guess because I have more confidence now. but so many opportunities arise from nowhere. And I'll just start talking to women. And I mean, I can find beauty in any woman. I don't even have to see a woman.

I mean, I can talk to a woman. Like, honestly, listen into your videos, just the way you talk and stuff like that. I feel like there's, I have a physical attraction towards you and have never even seen your face. I mean, right. Nor would you care.

You just want to go down on me. Oh, yeah. I would. Oh, I would. You don't care. I don't. No, I don't care.

But I mean, the whole point is that, right. That, like, in that situation, that just shows it really, it's not, it's like a vibe. But why don't, because it's interesting. I just posted an episode yesterday and about a guy who would just meet random people, like, whether it was like the receptionist that he met in two minutes and then now they're out in the parking lot fucking. And I'm about to. air an episode on Sunday with a guy who'll just meet the flight attendant on the plane and she fucks him. And you're here saying kind of the same thing. Like I don't even seek it out. But what I do

believe that like attracts like and there are people that are like kind of like are boundary pushers or have lack of boundaries or are the type of people that are a little bit out of control of themselves or acting out a little bit who and they could sense that that other person from a mile away and there's always they're like magnets to each other. So I think that I don't know, I'd like to hear one of your stories, for example, because you said it's hard to explain, you know, but like explain one of your stories of how you have met some women. And tell me some hot stories of like women that you just randomly met that you went down on. All right. I'll probably tell you the most interesting one. My grandmother, my grandfather died several years ago. And my grandmother met a,

up with a guy that she had went to, I think she said she went to high school with him, but she had known him before, but they had never dated. But they started talking and wound up getting married. Then they got divorced, then they got married again, and then they separated. But even after they separated, they decided they were just going to stay married. They were too old to start something new like that. They were both too set in their ways. But anyhow, he had. a daughter that's my age or he he has a daughter well he he has passed away now but the daughter's not and the daughter still comes over to my grandmother's house well i was at my grandmother's house doing a little work for and she had walked in front of me and i just looked up and she is beautiful i mean she is very beautiful for her age she is gorgeous what's her age she's 40 Okay. But I looked up at her and she had walked by me and said, oh, Lord, I went the wrong way and then turned around and walked by me again. And I looked up until I said, well, you can walk past me as many times as you want.

Well, later on that day, I had a Facebook request from her, a friend request. And we started talking over Messenger. And it wasn't two weeks later, she was inviting me. to her house. I came to her house after work because I work night shift still and we laid in the bed for probably two hours while she slept because she was, she had only been to sleep like maybe an hour by the time I got there. And she woke up and I, she just looked at me and said, you want to have a quickie real quick before you leave? And I spent the whole time just going down on her. And I mean, I'm sure she enjoyed it because she had squirted all in my face.

I mean, she, I seem to be pretty good at it. But another way I hooked up with a girl, I mean, the actual action or what actually happened when I went down on her, you know, was a real interesting. But I was sitting in Burger King, having lunch. And this girl was just walked up to me from behind the counter and sat. down beside me and asked me if I was taken. And I looked at her, I said, well, sometimes. And we started talking from there and we ended up having sexual relations. And I went down on her a lot.

Yeah, I mean, listen, like I said, I literally, and I might air your episode today, tomorrow, I literally have, it'll be like three episodes in a row of like these types of guys who will just these kinds of things. will happen, but I do believe it's an energy vibe thing. That woman knows exactly who you are and you know exactly who that woman is and therefore you meet them. Whereas like a guy who would never cheat on his wife who doesn't have this like obsession who isn't jilted by a lover and like sort of acting out. He would never do like he wouldn't find those scenarios, those girls because he's not putting out that energy like here I am available.

you know what I mean? Right. It's an energy exchange. I just believe that kind of stuff happens on the subconscious level. But I'm always like cock blocking these stories that people like want to hear. So anyway, like, you know, with my crazy analysis. But that's what I like to do. Did you ever try to work through how you felt like did you go to therapy?

Did you talk it out? Did you try to talk to her and get some closure? I mean, how did you get on with your life after you feel? found out about that. I mean, did you just shove it under the rug? I just shoved it under the rug. Right. It's like I have a closet in my mind and I just pushed it in the closet and shut the door. Yeah. Yeah, but this is what I think this is like a prime example and I'm going to do one more analysis and then I'll just get back to the regular story. But I, this is just a prime example of how like you could shove anything you want under the rug, but it's fucking there and it, the stench,

is coming through and it's affecting you. Like, it just is. And, you know, hopefully you're having a great time. You love to go down on girls. You do it all the time. You've been cheating on your wife, who's now your wife forever. And that's just where you're at. But, you know, you just hope that all of this doesn't come back to bite you in the ass one day.

And then it's just what it is is all this unresolved shit that is making you do stuff. That's not necessarily you. I mean, you were a totally monogamous guy. You are a guy who knows how it feels to be cheated on. You are now a guy who is doing that to somebody who you love. I have no doubt in my mind that you love your wife. It's not about her, but if she found out it would be about her. And now you have a victim.

And now she's where you are and you did that to her. You'd have a lot more to unpack than the shit that's under there right now. So I would suggest that you just try to deal with that a little bit because you just, because like I said, I do believe. that all this other stuff is not the cross-dressing and all of that, but the cheating on her with women is you acting out because of those unresolved feelings and all of that baggage that you have underneath your carpet or in your closet or wherever you said you put it. You know, the only way out of something is through it.

Some people don't want to go through it and that's fine. Maybe you could just keep going down on girls the rest of your life and your wife will never find out and you'll live a happy life. And that's great. I hope that for you. of times in these kinds of situations, I talk to you five years from now. You could wind up, like really messing up everything that you have for this reason. And I would feel for you, but it would kind of be like, well, that's what happens when you don't deal with stuff that you need to.

Yeah. I think she kind of knows that there are other people that I see because there's a lot of time that's unaccounted for that she doesn't even ask us. about this it's like a don't ask don't tell situation oh really i i feel like it kind of is i'm there's no way she doesn't know i mean there's that there's no way she doesn't know that something is going on she she doesn't know any kind of specifics or anything or i haven't told her but she's cool with that but she's okay like she's kind of like old school or not even old school maybe new school but just or just the type of woman that's like the fine like he maybe he needs a little variety every now and then.

I'll turn my back because he's a good guy in every other way. Because I could see that. I mean, that's pretty great then. You really met the perfect girl for you. Right. I mean, she kind of, I do believe she turns her back to it. I think she knows that, like I said, she's got to know something's going on because there's a lot of time that is unaccounted for

that she has no idea what was going on. And she doesn't even ask. I think she's afraid to find out. Yeah. Right. A lot of time, you know, she could be living in as much denial as you're. Right. She could be.

And I mean, I don't question her or anything about where she goes and what she does or anything. And if I were to find out that she were cheating on me, but I don't think I would really have much of a problem with it. I'm kind of like one of those don't ask, don't tell. I kind of turn my back. What I don't know doesn't hurt me. Right, but it did hurt you because you found out. And when you did find out, it really bothered you. Yeah.

Because I had turned down opportunities. I mean, I stayed as faithful as I could possibly be. Yeah. But yeah, it was real interesting. When I tell people some of my coworkers and stuff, because I really don't have that big of the circle besides the women. And right now, I'm really only talking to the one other woman that I met through my grandmother's ex-husband. But when I tell people at work, it just blows their mind.

They're like, wow, I would have never seen that out of you because I don't go around acting like a male horror or like I say, you're even trying to chase women down. I don't. I mean, it's just opportunities that just find me. It's crazy how it happens. It seems like when you're looking, you can never find it. But when you're not looking, it tends to find you. I guess. Like I said, I believe that there's just undercurrents of conscious shit going down.

And it's so obvious why it comes to you. I don't think you're not looking at it. You're not like some dupist walking out. You're like fucking bird's chirping in your brain. Just walking around and it's like a pussy pops up in your face. And you're like, oh, I. guess I got to go down on her. I mean, like, it's, you're like, it's, it's just, it's so, it's so obvious the pattern. Like, you had this wife, that ex-wife that you had to go down on, you had to prove

herself and that was like, it became a kink for you because it was like really hot. And then she cheats on you and you're kind of, I don't know, like, it just seems a little obvious to me why it happens. I don't think it's just so, for no reason. But that doesn't really matter. right now because your wife turns a blind eye, she's okay. Right. You'd be okay if she was cheating on you. So you're seeing now who still? Just the one girl that I had met that was my grandmother's husband's daughter.

She is the only one that I'm really talking to right now. I've pretty much distanced myself from the other ones. And sticking with with this one girl, I'll call her Renee. That's not her name, but I'll call her Renee. Renee? Yeah, that's what I'll call her. Yeah. Tell me about Renee.

But I mean, Renee, she is a great girl, but, and she always jokes with me and tells me that she's going to steal me from my wife and stuff like that. But, I mean, she's, she's, I like hanging out with her and talking with her and stuff. It's not just about sex, but the sex is really good. How did you mean her? I met her through my grandmother. Oh, that's the same one. Right, right.

I'm sorry. Okay. Right. So you still, now when you are having sex with these girls that you see behind your, your girls back, is it just, do you have penetration sex with them? Sometimes, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Of course. Yeah. I mean, I don't necessarily have to. I mean, there's times that I can just go down on them and I'm happy. I don't have to penetrate them. But I mean, a lot of times it does eventually lead to penetration most of the time. So do you love going down on your wife too? Does she love it?

I like going down on her. but she has a really leaky bladder, and sometimes she can't hold it. So it's not like squirting, it's like peeing on you. Right. Right. In the beginning, she was squirting, but now it's like she can't hold her bladder.

After she had a baby? Yeah, after she had our daughter. How long have you been with her? I've been with her for 13 years now. Oh, wow. And we just recently got married a few weeks ago, as a matter of fact. Congratulations. Thank you.

Now, the other ex-wife, did you ever confront her about her cheating? I mean, she's obviously the mother of you two sons, so you obviously still talk to her. I try to avoid her as much as absolute possible. Really? Oh, yeah. I mean, ever since we split up and I found out about the cheating. I have tried to distance myself as much as I can from her. Because I feel like I lost a part of me, not necessarily when her and I split up.

But whenever I found out about all the guys that she had been with while we were together. I know, but you think, you know, I once had this woman on, and it was so fascinating what she said. And I thought it was so sort of self-aware. She had a husband who cheated on her. and she was devastated. And then she started cheating on him. And cheating on him and realizing that she still loved her husband, but she was over here doing this with somebody else

and one had nothing to do with the other, really made her forgive him for cheating because she was able to see it more clearly. And I was like, wow, what a fucking interesting view of things, right? I don't think a lot of us could get to that place because we're so busy with like how we feel. Like you're still like she did this to me. Like you're still in that place. And I'm just saying you're still there because it's not like six months.

I wouldn't be saying that. It's like 13 years later and you still haven't gotten over it. And that's because you never dealt with it. You should be over it by now. Everyone makes mistakes. Like eventually you could get over things. I never understand why 20 years later people are still fucking mad and viciously mad at somebody that slighted them. And yeah, it was really.

bad what she did, but you can get past it. You can. Especially, no, no, no. Especially, especially since now you are the cheater. You do do it yourself. So you would think you'd maybe be able to look at what she was doing and understand it a little bit more and maybe say, okay, maybe she was shafted by somebody out. Like maybe there was a reason too for her because there is a reason for you.

So it's ridiculous that you're not over it 13 years later. She's the mother of your two children. Like you have more in common with her than you ever did. Actually, that's not the only reason I distance myself from her. Okay. I have a son. He was like 15 to 18 now. And he's been living with me for four years, 14.

He was 14. And she was going to the bars and drinking and going home. with guys and leaving him home alone for two or three days at a time with like no food in the house yeah she was a terrible mom too is what you're saying how old were you guys back then and how long ago was that that's only been like four years ago oh okay so she's still kind of a mess right oh yeah she is I really feel sorry she just got married too to her a guy that she had met in the bar but but she did my children wrong and I was paying her a lot of money in child support and I'm still paying her in child support and the one son that moved in with me is now 18 and my other son that I had with her is 21. But I'm still paying her child support even though one of them lives with me and the other one is off doing his own thing.

So I mean, it's not just the cheating that I have. have a problem with her that I distance myself from her more. Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. It's, yeah, I mean, it's not just that. More complicated, right. Right. Oh, yeah. There's a lot.

And she's still like that same person. She's like, if I was talking to her, I'd be telling her the same thing, like, clean up your fucking act. I mean, she has her own stuff. Oh, I'm sure. Yeah, she has her own stuff to get through. And then when you throw kids in and she's not being cool with your kids, that totally makes sense why you would really distance yourself.

But, you know, like I, I just hear a lot of, you know, in you that you, that you, you have it like in that little area of your life, that little closet. It's not your whole life. You know what I mean? There's so much more to you than this little thing. But because I see it so clearly, it's just like that little closet in your life. If you clean that up a little bit, I just feel like there could be a shift. And maybe listen, maybe with your girl that you're with now, you guys can still do what you're doing because she has a like a don't ask, don't tell thing and you're like don't mask don't tell and you are much more okay with if she was with other people whereas it totally shafted you before so i just feel if you cleaned up a little bit of that leftover stuff and you really

try to unpack it and move through it and sort of understand it and see it for what it was instead of taking it on so personally listen she cheated on you because she's a fucking mess okay she has her own hardcore issues she it is not capable of being any better than that it It had nothing to do with you. But I get why you personalize it at the time. But a lot of times when you're 13 years later, we should be able to look at situations like that and be able to sort of release them and releasing that kind of stuff and making yourself not the victim anymore.

It does help you with your own self. It's not about her. It's not about what you give to her. It's about what you would give to yourself. Right. And that would be great for you because it's just like I said, this little tiny. thing. And you never want your wife. I don't know. Like, how would your wife really feel if she knew? Because it's not like the sex. It would be like maybe not knowing. But I guess like you said,

it's not the same. Like with you with your wife, you had no idea. With this wife, you feel like she kind of has an idea. And it's obvious that you are getting your needs met someplace else. But she doesn't really care or she's in denial. So I, you know, like, yeah. her and I don't use condoms for instance and I have condoms like in my backpack that I take to work with me that she has seen yeah I keep them in my dresser at home which I never bring anybody home I won't do that yeah that is a rule but I mean it's simple things like that that she has seen that I know she has had to put together that I do go see other women. But like I said, now I've narrowed it down now. I only mess with the one. And I hate to say it,

but I've kind of developed some feelings for the one that I still see. Oh, my goodness. I mean, it's not like marriage, but it's almost like I just don't want to let her go. Yeah. Well, you said she tells you these things, like, oh, you could leave your wife for me, and you've been seeing her for a long time,

and it's not just sex. I mean, you said a couple things before that I was like, oh, God. Hopefully that doesn't wind up happening that you wind up having feelings for her because it's like crossing a line of hitting it and quitting it. Right. Yeah, all the other ones have been like just a couple times here or there and then kind of losing contact.

But this one has stuck around and it's kind of important to me. I mean, but she has really really caused me to feel for her. I don't want to just walk away from her, but I wouldn't at the same time leave my wife for her. I do believe I love my wife more than the feelings I have for what we call it in Renee, I think.

Yeah, Renee. Right. How many times a month do you see Renee? probably one to two times a week so probably four to six I would say times a month I mean that's like it's a little bit like an affair which is a little bit harsher than cheating I think for someone to swell I listen I think any kind of cheating if you don't know about it and it is horrifying because you were cheated on but I think when it's just randoms if I was a girlfriend's friend and someone's like oh my god he was like fucking everybody I'd be like but they were like like hookers or random people. That's one thing. But if it's like someone, the same person, somebody all the time, like that's even like another pill to swallow. Like that's even a harder pill to swallow because you're like, oh my God, now he was

emotionally attached to someone else. If you have your emotional attachment someplace else, a part of it is going someplace else, then there's no way your wife is getting 100%. Now listen, some people could be polyamorous and everything and love more. than one person at the same time, but that's not what's going on here. There's no, both of you would need to be open to that. So then she would also be getting some parts of herself someplace else. But like, you do have a part going out someplace else.

And it's two times a week. That's a lot. That's like an affair. And I feel like that's even worse for somebody else as far as cheating is concerned. Don't you think? Probably so. Oh, my God. I would have to agree.

I never really even looked at it that way, honestly. I just looked at it as going to hang out. Yeah, well, it just, but that's just what happened over time. I mean, yeah, you didn't set out to have an affair. A lot of times that's what happened, especially like with coworkers or something, because it's just like the time spent. You're seeing somebody more and more. You keep having sex.

Now you're talking. You're hanging out a little bit more. A lot of times it's not. It's something that sort of happens without you really intending for it to. happened, but here you are. Right. You just got married. When I work, yeah, my, our work schedule, my wife works day shift and I work night shift.

So throughout the week, we really don't even see each other. Mm-hmm. And what I'll do is I'll get off work and I'll go home and I'll pick my daughter up and I'll take my daughter to school and then go to, like, Renee's, house for a few hours and then come home and it probably is more leaning toward a fair she actually even looked at me like last week and told me she said love you and I just I looked at her and I didn't respond I just kind of acted like I didn't hear it because I wasn't about to tell her I love her too.

Right. Oh my God. Because it just seems like once you say it, it's like you're locked in now. Do you feel like you love her? I don't think I love her. I mean, I do love my way. She has stuck by me. I mean, I went down a dark rabbit hole of taking pain pills and had to get help.

the whole time for like six years she stuck by my side and carried me through it so i don't do anything to try to hurt her yeah it's just why were you so hooked on pain pills it was it just something that happened like how did you get through that dark time did you go to therapy and stuff like well i had i had a back surgery yeah and they gave you some oxycodone so good well they gave me a hydrocodone. Yeah. They were given me, or it had eventually went from taking the five milligrams to the 10 milligrams. Yeah.

Taking two of the 10 milligrams every four to six hours. Mm-hmm. And eventually they were given me 90 bills every six days. I, can you fucking believe? Like, I could kill you. Crazy. Yeah. Eventually, that's what it led to.

Yeah. And I got so hooked on them. Yeah. It was crazy. I had to get professional help. Of course. I had to go through a suboxin clinic. Yeah.

To actually get help to get off of them. Oh yeah, because you're physically fucked at that point. You can't even get off like safely alone. No. I mean, I tried. I tried. I would take time off from work and my wife, bless her heart, she would help me get wrapped up in blankets because I'd be freezing cold. Yeah, of course.

Yeah. I would ship myself because my dry rea would be so bad. Mm-hmm. And I just couldn't do it by myself. I had to get help. That's amazing that you got through that because that's really difficult, like you said. I mean, six years. And how long have you been past that part of your life?

2017 is whenever I got clean. So that's great. Five years? Yeah, that's great. Mm-hmm. Five years. Yeah, I won't even go close to. I won't do anything with them.

I don't even like them in the house. I just don't even want to be close to him. Yeah, of course, of course. Yeah, you need to stay the fuck away. Oh, yeah. Because look how hard it was to get out and you literally got out and you were so lucky and it was so hard and you got through that, which is really difficult and you should really be impressed with yourself or like happy with yourself for doing that.

That why would you ever put your take one more than you'd have to go down that? that path again. No way. I totally get that and that's like amazing. And like I could see why you would feel that way towards your wife because she was there and stuck with you through that and helped you. Oh yeah. I mean she carried me. She when my money started going all towards buying pills to keep me active so I could go to work because it was like I had to work to buy the pills. Yeah. But I had to have the pills to go to work. Wow. Crazy. Right. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

I mean, she is a really good woman. She's an old school type woman. She, I think once she develops that connection, there's nothing I could do that would push her away completely. She would still work through whatever. Yeah,

that's why I said before I was like, oh, is she old school in that? She just knows, okay, this is like man or men. And this is what they do. But he comes home to me. He's there for me. like I just turn a blind eye.

Right. That's what I think it is more than, more than she just doesn't have a clue. I think she just turns her back. Yeah. Right. I mean, you do say that you leave your stuff around. You're not really hiding it so much.

And it's not, it's like kind of obvious in some ways. And she doesn't really say anything. Right. So you're lucky you did meet the right girlfriend. for you. Too bad she has her bladder issue because you do love to go down on women. So now here you have to go and see fucking Renee to go down on her. I'll still

go down on her. I mean, I don't enjoy the urine, but there's times between the urine that I just flat out enjoy. Like I said, I'd get into bondage a lot. I like being tied up and I like the woman

taking control and sitting on my face. I mean, that's probably my favorite. And she'll do it. I mean, we actually even have a milking machine that she'll put on me. And one time, it was like, I was tied up and the milking machine ran for like an hour. And I was getting ready to give up. She came in and sat down on my face and forced me to go down on her.

And it was like almost instant. I had one of the biggest orgasms I've had in my life. What the fuck is a milking machine? It's a machine that it's kind of like a milking machine for a cow. Yeah. But it goes on the men's penis and like simulates a blowjob or sex or so. And it's automated. It's not manual.

It's like kind of jerking you off kind of thing. Right. Okay. And so she had you locked into that. You're tied up. She's like kind of like edging you with that. Right. And then came in and does the face sitting for you. And that's like the top of the mountain. Right. That's the only way I could even orgasm in it as as turned on as I was just by her being next to me. Yeah. When she got on top of me and I started going down on her, that's whenever I actually. came. But I mean, I could just, at the drop of a hat, I could stop what I'm doing and go down on her. If honestly, if I was in a room with a woman that I found attractive, which I mean, like I said earlier, I can see beauty at all women. I don't even have to see them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it. Yeah. But if I'm in a room with a woman that I have some type of physical attraction and she were to drop her pants, And asked me, I would. I would go down on it.

I enjoy it that much. Do you have, like, and does it matter? Does, like, nothing else matter except that part of the woman at that point? Like, are you into all different shapes, sizes, age? Like, does nothing matter except that? Well, I wouldn't want to be much younger than, like, 25. Mm-hmm. Because to me,

having a child that's 21 now an early 20s woman seems like a child to me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. I got it. But other than that, no, I mean, there's no limits. I've never actually been with a woman of another color, but I'm not opposed to it. Right. It's just never actually happened. right but you love it that much that no matter who it is like you said you don't even need to see their face I mean they could be it's the going down it's the action of you doing it that you love that much and actually I prefer women that are like 10 to 15 years older than me it's just that the whole experience is just so much more laid back

relaxed, taking our time getting into it. And I mean, I've been told that I should ensure my mouth. I mean, it seems like I've gotten pretty good at it. I mean, I don't know because I can't feel it myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you're good. But I feel like I'm pretty good. And now does your Renee girl care if you see other people?

Does she ever ask you if you're doing this with anyone else? I mean, does she not give a shit? She's never asked me. But, I mean, I have it really since. I would probably say I started cutting back like three to four months ago. Mm-hmm. And now ever since I've gotten married a few weeks ago, I don't. even talk to anybody else.

I have a text or commented on anybody else's things or anything like that since then. And to be honest, would you, I tried to put Renee down. I tried to distance myself. I made it about two

weeks. And she happened to text message me. Right. But is that because you felt like, oh, I'm getting married. Maybe I should stop this? Right. I was trying to slow down. you know, trying to just go ahead and commit myself and be monogamous. But that temptation is there and it's hard to resist that temptation.

Yeah. Especially because you've been there, done that, and this girl's in your life and you're very comfortable with her and your kind of friends. Right. She's not some random. She's almost wife in number two. Yeah. My main wife, I really don't see Monday through Friday unless she takes a day off or something like that.

Then I'll see her for a couple hours before I go to sleep so I can get up and go to work. But during the week, I probably spend more time with Renee than I do my wife. I mean, my wife, I see during the weekend. And I commit the weekends to her. I don't run out on her. I don't commit those weekends to her. That's our time. Yeah.

But yeah, I mean, it's, I don't know if I would say it's out of control or if it's just the temptation and I enjoy it so much. And not only do I enjoy the taste and the activity of actually doing it, but I enjoy the response, but I enjoy the response, the knowing that I am pleasuring her. She is enjoying it just. Yeah. Mm-hmm. For sure. That's almost as good as the taste and the activity. I mean.

Yeah, I get that. I think a lot of people have that in them. That makes sense. Right. That's what takes it over the top for you. And it is something that you're good at when you've honed your skills. Just be, do me a favor and be careful. You're on a slippery slope with Renee.

Okay. Renee, I worry about Renee. Do me a favor. I'm going to end this call now. but do me a favor and let me know at the end of this year where you're at. I don't want you to get busted. Like you said, your girl's old school.

She wouldn't probably leave you. She's been through so much with you. Maybe she kind of knows. Maybe she's never going to find out or get caught because it's kind of right in front of her face and she does not want to know. And that's great. Honestly, like it works for you. And I'm hoping that this doesn't blow up and it might not because she is that way.

So that's cool. But just be careful because you're kind of. of having an affair and you have this girl over here and I don't know maybe it'll work out forever there's a chance it's not one of those things that I really think you're going to get busted um because of like your wife's thing but be careful because like I said you're just she's developing feelings for you I think I'm going to try to start slowing down and and maybe stopping but I don't want to make her mad yeah I get it because you like I don't want her to tell anybody that that we are having relations.

I get around to my life. It is a slippery slope. Yeah, be careful. That's all I'm saying. Like you're out of place right now. You just got married. You wanted to slow down. Make sure to figure out that situation over there and decide how far you want to go with it or if you want to put the breaks and whatever you decide, follow through with it. Maybe for now it's okay to just keep seeing a return it. Try and stop it slowly.

because what happens is like what you resist persist. You say, oh, I'm never seeing her again. And then two days later, because you just know you're not allowed to, you just wanted even more human nature. So maybe slowly get yourself out of it. But anyway, good luck with it all. I feel like I analyzed you a lot on this episode. Sorry, but I like it.

It's interesting. Yeah, it's interesting. But thanks so much for calling it and sharing your story. There's a little bit about a lot of different things. I'm thinking of starting a cross-dressing tier for my Patreon. So if I do that, maybe you call back in until we just talk all about that part of your life for that tier because I'm going to do that. I can't do it a cross-dressing episode every week on my show, but I could if I wanted to because I have that many taped already and that many people who are into cross-dressing that want to call in. So I'm going to do something over my Patreon with that.

So you could be on a guest to just talk about that. Your panty has cross-dressing fetish. we could have you on for that show as well. But keep me posted over now. I want an end of the year update. Make sure that all's good in your life. Sure. All right.

Thanks, John. Thanks so much for calling in. And thank you, Kathy. Bye. Bye. Hey, everyone. Thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode.

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