Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 530 - Bisexual Goldie Met her BF at a Foursome Set Up by her Ex & Now They Have an Open Relationship

Episode Date: September 19, 2022

Goldie met her boyfriend at a foursome (set up by her ex boyfriend) and now they have an open relationship and she called in to talk all about it. How long had she been dating her boyfriend before they had the foursome? Why did he set up the foursome? And, how and why did leave him to be with her current boyfriend? Tune in for all the details which include how her religious upbringing as well as a much older guy taking her virginity led to a lot of guilt when it came to s-e-x, how she was very sexual from the get go, how abusive her ex was and why he was so jealous of her past, the foursome he set up and exactly what went down, how he let her to continue to hook up solo with one of the guys and how that connection grew, how and when her and her current boyfriend opened up their relationship, , her past and current hook ups with other women, their threesomes they have, his hook ups with other guys, he one mmf threesome they had and exactly what went down, how she needs her emotions to be a part of her hook ups and how that confuses their relationship, her camming experience, why she loved it so much and how her ex boyfriend ruined it for her, how she’s into vintage pron photos and how she enjoys mocking them up, the onlyfans account she’s creating and a whole lot more. Her onlyfans: https://onlyfans.com/goldieharlow  **To see anonymous pics of Goldie + anonymous pics of most of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly anonymous podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it.

The temptation is just too much. It's real problem. Do your friend know that you're banging her or no? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your freak flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to rehire. your wits and chain. Here is your host, Kathy.

Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast with Kathy. If you want to follow the Strictly Anonymous podcast on Instagram or Twitter, follow the show at Strict Anonymous. I also am always looking for people to call into the show. If you want to be on the show, this is a call-in show where people tell me their secret, naughty lives, their interesting stories. Some people even call in because they want my unprofessional advice. I think I give good advice and I love giving advice. I love picking up shit apart and talking to people for hours about their nonsense. So if you fall into any of those categories you want to be on the show while remaining anonymous because I do change everybody's voices. Nobody sounds like they do that you hear.

Change your voice. You change your name. You call me from a private number. You want to be on the show. Send me an email. Strictly anonymous podcast.g.com. Go to my website, strictly anonymouspodcast.com and click on Beyond the show or follow me on Instagram or Twitter. at Strict Anonymous and DM me there. Just give me a brief one paragraph, one small paragraph about what you want to talk about. And if I think it would be great for my show, I'll send you a link to sign on.

If you just have a confession, you want to air on my show. I don't post my confessions yet on my podcast. I post them on my Patreon. You could call my anonymous confessions line. That you could call 247, the number 347, 4203579. 3474203579. Today I have on Goldie. Goldie Harlow. What a name, huh? Goldie's first email to me,

and we talk about this on the thing. The first sentence in her emails, like group sex saved me from a dysfunctional relationship. And I was like, oh my God, like I got to hear this fucking story. And you got to hear it. Okay. This is a girl who, she had a heard past. We get a little bit into that because there are a couple. things, or one specific thing that happened when she was young besides her religious upbringing, that I think plays a big part into everything that she got into afterwards. But we get into that past first, and then she talks about her first boyfriend, who right from the get-go, was not a good guy.

And she had a very long dysfunctional relationship with him. And then he's the one that came up with this great idea for them to like, oh, have like sex with other people. And, you know, she talks about what that led to, what happened, how that got her away from him, how it got her into the relationship that she's in now, which is, and it's an ethically non-monogamous relationship where her and her partner have other partners. She's dated women. She's fooled around with women. He identifies as queer. So does she. they're allowed to date men or women, date solo, they're still together.

She is not one of those people that doesn't, you know, her sex isn't involved in her emotions. I mean, they are very connected. So the other couples she sees or the other people she sees, she has relationships with them. And so does her guy have relationships with other people. She talks about how that all works out, what they're into, what she's really into. She has a thing where she really likes for guys to be like fucking jeweling. on her. So she did start camping at a certain point.

She is starting an only fan. She has a Reddit page that she gives out all of her shoutouts to that stuff. Her only fan she's getting up and running for this podcast episode. She sent me in picks. They don't disappoint. They're on my Patreon.

If you want to see them as well as see anonymous picks of all of my past guests, go to my Patreon. Patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. The link to that is in the description as well as a link to all the stuff she gives shoutouts to in this episode. You're going to love her story. It's full of lots of different things, the good, the bad, and the ugly and a happy ending

because this is a girl who had, like I said, a hard past. But she really worked through things and she is in a very healthy, happy relationship. And it happens to be very open. and she talks all about it. So I'm going to be right back on with Goldie. Hi, Goldie. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast. How are you this morning?

I'm so good. Thank you for having me. Oh, I'm excited for you to be on because I think like the first sentence of your email to me was like group sacs saved me from an abusive relationship. But I'm like, you know, that's not a sentence you hear that often. I was like, I need the rest of the story. It's the great beginning of a very captivating story, I would assume,

because, like, how can group sex save you from an abusive relationship? I mean, it is what it sounds like. I guess that I thought almost that I wouldn't be on the show for this very reason because it's such an alarming headline. No. Listen, I like, I'm a fucking realist, okay? Anybody that's listened to my show for long enough knows, I like real shit. Okay. Real shit sometimes sounds like this. Real stuff doesn't make sense a lot of the times. Real stuff, real life is messy. Real life is complicated. Real life has things about it that don't make sense. That's more fucking real. When things seem so perfect, that to me is unreal. So this kind of shit, I live for it because it's like the real deal.

I mean, I love to hear that. And I've always gotten that from your podcast. Yeah. Like, yeah, yeah. This is real life. Real life. Real life. This girl was saved by group sex saved her from abusive.

That's real. You can't make this shit up. That's why I hate like actually why I'm obsessed with reality TV and stuff and always have it. And like sometimes once in a while someone will force me to watch some scripted shit. And if it's really trying to be real life, like if it's scripted and it's scripted and it's, so out of the ordinary like Handmaid's Tale, that's like fucking

great. But if they're trying to be like real life scripted stuff, it always rings so untrue to me because real life stuff is real life. It doesn't make sense. And I think sometimes when people are writing about real life, they don't write in that way. So anyway, let's get back to you. Tell me your story, Goldie.

Yeah. So I guess let's start from the beginning. I had grown up in a very Catholic household. I also had been a very sexual person from a very young age. The church definitely had a kinky effect on me, I guess, just to keep it light. And no, I don't keep it light, okay? I don't like light. What do you mean? The church had a very sexual, like, were you abused somehow or something? Is that what you're trying to say? I wasn't abused as a child. I, I,

I took it very seriously and it was such a heaviness. I just remember feeling so much heaviness from such a young age and that just so happened to reflect itself in this first formative relationship that I had had. Oh, so the first one right out of the bat was the abusive one. Right out of the bat. I was in high school. We had met in grade nine and yeah, he had kind of, Like, I had had sexual experiences before him. Actually, quite a few here and there.

Like, how old were you when you lost your virginity? Oh, gosh. I'm going to sound pretty bad here. I was 12. Wow. And who was that with? I mean, what grade are you at 12? Do you remember?

I was in grade seven. Okay, so seventh grade. I'm trying to remember myself in seventh grade. Who did you have sex with in seven? in the grade. In seventh grade, I had sex with a boy that was the brother of a friend of mine, and he was in university. So how old was he? Like 18, 20? 18, yeah. Ooh, yeah, that might have been, you know, R-A-P-E. Let me say, come on. Yeah, I mean, I, it's sort of a funny thing. Like, I definitely look back on that as my adult self and think, oh, fuck, that was like, that's kind of fucked up.

But at the time, all I knew was that was horny and, you know, he was really cool. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So I had had, you know, a little bit of experience from being quite young. And then when I met this guy in high school, he was a virgin. And, you know, he really made me feel. like if I could be a really good girlfriend to him,

that I would be able to sort of wipe the slate clean from this past that I had had, where, you know, maybe I had sex too young. Can I ask you a question about that first guy, the guy that was in university that you lost your virginity to? Did he, did you continue to have sex with him? And then who came after that before this guy? Like who were you sleeping with? A lot of older guys or?

this was the only older guy and we only had sex one time and then I did have other sexual experiences with you know boys in my grade and stuff nothing too explicit just sort of foreplay stuff or like you know hand jobs and things like that right okay yeah and then for this high school boyfriend it just felt like oh wow this is really what I'm like true love is supposed to feel like, like, you know, like we're navigating through this together. I immediately was completely consumed by this person. I felt like he had, like, completely saved me from this troubled time that I had had. And I mean, like, you know, I tried to make light of it, but it was hard. It was hard losing my virginity that, yeah. I mean, that really wasn't your doing. it was kind of taken from you.

That's a whole different thing that maybe you'll unpack or see differently at some point in your life. But I get why you felt that. I don't think it's just the religious thing. I think losing your virginity that much older guy also was something that was put on you that you had to unpack and was also at play here. I think you're absolutely right with that. And I think that definitely played into how I was able to. have sex going forward. Like, yeah, there was this sense of like, I remember a lot of the first times.

And even to this day, like, the first times that I tend to have sex with partners. Like, I almost need there to be a dominant energy coming from them to just take me. Yeah, right. Because your initial wiring was. that intense situation where someone was completely dominating you, of course. So this guy, you start dating him and he's just captivating. Like, I'm assuming most of the time, you know, abusive guys or bad relationships, that's all I've ever had in my life.

You know, they have red flags right from the beginning. I mean, when did you start, when did this relationship go from being this savior in your life to being something that was unhealthy? I mean, it was honestly fairly quickly. Like we had a few good months, just like any relationship, the honeymoon phase, everything's amazing. You can do no wrong. They can do no wrong. And then when I look back, the first glimpses for me were when I would start to, you know,

I would still chat with boys at school and things like that. But he would start to really police the way that I was conducting myself at school specifically, like telling me certain outfits were inappropriate or certain people were off limits to speak with. And I was just so young. Like at this point, I'm only 16 and he was like my first real boyfriend. And in my head, I was like, oh, this means like he really loves me. But of course, looking back, it's like, okay, red flag. He was just thinking of himself.

He was a deeply insecure, distrustful person with his own issues, and he was just dumping them all onto you. It was more about making him feel better because he felt, you know, uncomfortable with all the stuff you were doing because it threatened him. Yeah, and I think that kind of played into this idea as well that, like, I had had these sexual experiences, whether or not they were positive for me, he really saw that as an inequality in our relationship,

and this would continue to be an issue for the next nine years that I ended up saying with him. Wow, nine years. That's a long time, Goldie. Nine years. Yeah. No more. Yeah.

Too long. I mean, listen, it's hard to get out of those kinds of relationships, unfortunately. A lot of times the sexual energy, involved in a very dysfunctional relationship that's pushing all of your buttons and is perfectly suited to push your buttons can be very charged up. Sometimes it's like the best sex you've ever had, which makes it even harder to leave. No, and that's exactly the thing was that those were those first fights of like, okay, I can't

talk to these boys at school. And then, you know, maybe I would push, you know, my boundaries a little bit so that we could have that big fight and then, you know, the makeup sex after that was so amazing. And then, you know, you go into that, it's that cycle of, you know, harmony, disharmony, and healing. Yeah, drama. And it's just so, it's so addictive. Yeah, for sure.

Absolutely. And sometimes, listen, as much as he's dumping his issues onto you, you're playing out your issues with him. So he's perfectly suited to, in a weird way. Okay, I just believe this always, and I saw it in my life with my bad relationships. I mean, a lot of times these people we draw into each other, they're going to do something for us as well. Even if it seems negative and what he did, he was very abusive. Somehow he was pushing your stuff so that those, all that stuff that you had, you were, he was bringing it up, right?

He went in there with a lot of baggage, of course, because of what happened to you. I see you as a victim and then this person just brought up all that stuff. So I'm glad that you're out of that relationship but we're going to have a resolution but that's what that was all about and it makes sense.

That's what happens. I agree. And I mean like, I think I try to sugarcoat it because I think of that first experience and I'm like, oh, he was just a kid too, but in reality it seems different than 12.

Yeah, this is what I always do when there's stories in the paper about teachers, fucking kids and stuff like that. And one of my guy friends will be like, oh, if I was in school, I would like, I send them a picture of a kid from that grade. Not them, not them, just any way. I Google, you know, a 12 year old, Google a 12 year old girl when you get off the phone. And look at a picture of any 12 year old girl and think to yourself like, is that girl, like what 18 year old looks at that girl and says I want to fuck her

somebody that has a problem like that girl a 12 year old girl is a child not a woman you know so that's that's sometimes an easier way to really look at something like what does a you know 12 years old is not a is a little girl oh 100% and like I was just sort of the perfect victim in the sense that I was hypersexual, but that was really coming from a place of wanting connection. Of course, it's acting out, especially because you had all that religious shit put on you. So it makes sense that this little girl that had sex as this most important thing, if you're going to

act out, you're going to use that as your way to act out. But let's like, you know, get to the part, because you do eventually get out of it and you are, I'm assuming, because of your email. out, like using sex or controlling it and doing it in a much healthier way than you have before. Is that how it comes to play, like, that sentence of like, oh, this is a group sex saved me from that? Is it that you finally took hold of it yourself instead of having him control it? Well, I mean, like, I can kind of go through the events of what led to that group sex moment. So we had been together for nine years at this point. And I think I had mentioned before that it always bothered him that he was a virgin when we had gotten together and that I had had these sexual experiences before him.

And he felt very jealous of that. So he was the one to start actually pressuring me to maybe have group sex or open our relationship in some way. I was actually completely not on board. I was so scared. I had no confidence. But because of our dynamic that he had such a dominance over me and I was so eager to please him. And because this had been like an age old issue in our relationship, I was committed to try to fix it. And I thought, okay, so we need to have a for some.

that'll fix everything. And that wasn't the case at all. So I had gone on a trip by myself for school. And when I had gotten back, my boyfriend had said, hey, so I shared some news of you with our mutual friend. And he's really interested in you and thinks he's really hot. So all of a sudden, this mutual friend of ours is in the mix and has. seen these pictures of me naked and I'm freaking out, but they've planned this whole thing that we're going to have this for some with this friend and this girl that he's seeing, and it's going to be great. And that was the plan. So we end up having this weekend, the four of us, we go to a cottage and, you know, we're partying and staying up late and being very flirtatious. And at one point, I stripped, we all stripped down and I'm standing there in the living room naked. And this guy,

my friend, is just staring at me and my body. And I just felt so powerful in that moment in a way that I had never felt in my entire life. He was just drooling over how I looked and thought I was absolutely stunning. And I really felt seen sexually for like the first time I would say in my life. And I was immediately addicted to that feeling. And it was like a switch one off. And I can just pinpoint it. me standing naked in this living room.

No one's even touching me and just this man staring and loving me. That's interesting. Was the fourth person there? Was that his girlfriend or was there someone else there? Or was it just you, your guy and this guy to start off? It was his girlfriend was there as well. But she wasn't really into girls, which actually this whole experience also was highlighting my

you know, I hadn't realized that I was bisexual yet either. So then that also brought stuff up for me. And now I'm, you know, a practicing bisexual. Right. So, but yeah, I was like this one thing of, you know, I just remember that guy's face. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And now did it go further? I mean, how did that girl feel about her guy totally into you?

Did you wind up fooling around with him? I ended up pulling around with him. Nothing too wild that weekend, just a lot of makeouts and, you know, heavy petting and a little bit of foreplay. But we ended up coming back from that weekend. And that guy actually then spoke to my boyfriend and asked if maybe him and I could have some solo dates, like the two of us. And my boyfriend really liked this idea because it meant that he could go out and, you know, maybe he potentially. they fuck a girl by himself. And that was something he really wanted to do.

And I was really scared about it, but I was completely hooked on the way that this guy was viewing me. And so I ended up going on a solo date with this friend of ours. And his girlfriend was totally fine with it as well. And we ended up having a completely amazing night that, you know, went to like 7 in the morning, no sleep. just enjoying each other sexually. But as well as emotionally too, I mean, were you on a date date or was this just a hookup date?

He took me on a date date. He took me, you know, we went to a concert, we went for a drink. Right. And we had a hotel. It was amazing. So it was like the full-on girlfriend-boyfriend experience. It really was. And I mean, we had, I think because we had a friendship to begin with.

Yeah. That helped us have that intimacy. And it was just so different than what I was used to. He was so appreciative of everything I did. Like I could do no wrong. And I was so perfect. And yeah, it was a really great experience. So what happens after that first date?

I mean, did he wind up going on dates too? I know that this is the beginning of the end. Oh, yeah. So he ended up going on a date that same night that I had gone on a date. So we had both ended up sleeping with other people separately. And, you know, it was then I started to feel myself really detached. And it was, honestly, it was like night and day. Like I could just feel myself all of a sudden I don't care about this relationship and I want out. And there's nothing that could stop me from getting. away from this person. And it was like everything from the years of, you know, controlling abuse and neglect just came crashing down. And I was like, I need more of whatever that is. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, you just needed that. It's like a window of opportunity came your way that you probably always was looking for on some level. But once it was there, you're like, you had been done with. that relationship probably many years before, but you just had no way out. That's exactly right. Yeah.

So what happens? Keep going. So you're both, you, okay, now you both have solo dates with other people. Do you go back and talk about it? Do you have great sex afterwards? I mean, what happens between you guys after you both straight or not straight, but, you know, we're with other people? Well, I think that was the thing that I was expecting was that we would return and we'd have

this great makeup sex almost like when we would have these horrible fights through our relationship. But for me, I was completely disconnected. I didn't feel any want to have sex with him again. And I mean, I didn't really want to know about his date. He didn't really want to know about mine. There was a big fight that did happen because the guy that I had been seeing and going on dates with was a little bit into impact play. and that was something that I was really into and hadn't, you know, experienced yet, but I, of course, came back with all these bruises on my ass and gotten a lot of trouble for that.

Oh, my God. Like, what the fuck did you do? Yeah, yeah. He didn't like that humiliation aspect. So, like, you know, I know not a cuck bone in his body, I guess. Yeah. Well, somewhat. I mean, not the humiliation aspect, but he definitely had this thing where he wanted to share you with others, because he's the one that said this all up to begin with.

He didn't realize what he was setting up his relationship demise. But, I mean, he was the one who opened up Pandora, what is it, Pandora's box, right? I mean, like, he was the one that was like, here we go. Well, and then the biggest turnoff for me then was that I then decided I wanted to pursue. to my first sexual experience with a girl. So I ended up having a date with a girlfriend of mine and coming on to her. And she, you know, was actually super into me and had had a big crush on me for years. And we had really great sex.

And I was super happy. And I went back to tell him about this. And his response was he was so jealous that I had had sex with this particular girl that he said you need to call her and set up a date between the two of us so I can fuck her too. So that's where I'm like, it's totally not about me. It really sounds like like a child. You know, that's like a child mentality.

You know, they're super immature. In a weird way, I just could see someone really just, it's such a baby way to look at things, you know, but some people are fucking big babies. It's just like, now I got to fuck her too. That's hilarious. Did you set it up? Did you set it up? I told her and she was so, of course, just so offended. So offended. Like, I'm never talking to him again. Yeah. No. Did not work out for him. So she didn't, she never had sex with the guy, but did you continue on seeing her?

I didn't continue on seeing her. It was just that one date. But, you know, a very lovely memory for both of us. I did continue seeing that guy, though. Uh-huh. Yeah. And your guy was okay with that? He tried to shut it down, and then that's when I shut it down, actually. That's what finally made me. Oh, when he said you can't see him anymore, you were like, well, I'm not going to stop, so then I'll just stop seeing you.

That's right. Yeah. This is like one of those swingers stories gone wrong, you know? This is like what not to do. You know, but you were obviously in a weird way, this was kind of like sabotage. For you, it worked out really well because this was like a bad relationship that you wanted to get out. So this just really like with the nail in the coffin for the both of you's. But in a weird way, it was great because it did help you get out.

It helped me get out. It gave me so much confidence that I needed. And, you know, I just haven't looked back ever since I continued. need to have these, you know, great sexual experiences. And I am just so excited to be, you know, out there. Yeah. So let's get into all of that because I know that you do camming. You have only fans.

Like you have gone to an extreme in some sense. You know, and you're very free now and doing what you want to do. But I know that that's where it ends and that's where you're at now. But let's just get back to still that same point in the relationship. you end the relationship with your guy. And now, are you continue to see that one guy or, because I do also know that you're in a, an non-monogamous relationship currently.

Is it with that guy or someone else? Yes, it is with that guy. Oh, it is. So you wind up with that, his friend. Oh, my God. He's so dumb. He's so dumb. He, like, handed you over your new boyfriend.

Quite literally. Yeah. So, yes. So I live with that new boyfriend and we have, yeah, an ethically non-monogamous relationship, E&M, I guess. Wait, what happened between them? Are they still friends or no? Yeah, we're, oh, with his girl? With her girl, with your guy. I mean, I need to know what, you know, the aftermath of like this whole thing explodes. You're with this guy now. I mean, are you, is that guy still friends with your ex-boyfriend? or is what about his girlfriend you know what happened no so his girl was completely fine with it which is you know oddly amazing and strange we actually did end up having a three some the three of us

later on and that was kind of like a nice way to end everything um interesting and yeah her and i are good that's cool no but you're a guy what about your guy. This was his good friend and now he winds up stealing you away. They must have got in the biggest fight. I would assume they're not friends anymore. They are absolutely not friends anymore.

No. No, I mean like we we tried to keep it secret for a little while but eventually it came out because we realized we had you know, real feelings for each other.

How long have you been dating him by the way, as of now. Like how long ago was it when? I guess four years. Yeah, wow. And he's a good guy. He's a sweetheart. Right.

He's an absolute sweetheart. A gem. Yeah. Yeah. He's great. So how did you guys? So you get involved in this interesting way. You're dating someone else.

You guys fuck and go, you know, it's a very weird way to start a relationship. So I'm assuming that since it was that kind of scenario from the get-go, it just always remained open? Or did you close it down and then decide to open it up? How did you wind up in an open relationship with him? Yeah. So, I mean, it was definitely open from the start. But we did have a good two-year period of monogamy, mostly to do with the pandemic and, you know, trying to be cautious. just where we were at in our lives.

We were moving in together. We were really enjoying the relationship that we had between the two of us. So we just, we actually just recently opened it back up again this summer. So we're back. Yeah, I think that that's good. I've heard that before from other couples. A lot of times that first couple of years, it's good to build that foundation for sure.

Like you said, you know, if you're really into each other, I think in the beginning maybe there's no need for anyone else. And that's the way, it should be not to say that the ones that are open from the get-go are wrong, but I think that it can only help to have that two-year where you're just really, like, really just focused on each other. Well, yeah, and I think, like, the early years are, it's fun. Like, you're falling in love. And I just didn't really care to talk to anyone else at the beginning. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I understand that. So then recently you guys decided to open it up? We opened it back up this summer. So it's been a wild summer. We're both identified as queer. So a big part of that has been, you know, navigating these feelings that we've had. And he's mostly dated girls. I've mostly, you know, dated guy, I guess, one guy.

But we both really wanted to start exploring that stuff. of ourselves. Him being with guys and you being with girls, is what you're saying? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. So that was the main reason to open things back up again. But mostly it's just, it's just really fun.

And I think it enriches our relationship. And it's really fucking hot that, you know, he goes on dates and comes back and I get to hear all about it. And yeah, I just, I'm loving it. But let me ask you this. Are the dates with men? or women for the both of you now at this point? Or just the same sex?

Yeah, anyone is on the table. I currently have two other partners that I'm seeing kind of on a regular basis. So I see another guy who's really lovely. And then I also have a partner who's non-binary, like a non-binary clear person. And do you always just, play solo or do you ever have group sex together as well?

We have group sex together as well. I would say right now solo has been preferred just because it takes a lot of emotional energy to have group sex, really. But it is something that we have done this summer and we have done in the past early on in our relationship. And yeah, it's always been fun. But I do find like I feel like I like to get to that deeper level one-on-one with people when I'm fucking them. That's just like my preference.

You enjoy it more that way. I do. I do. And I do enjoy both. And there's something, you know, sexy to be said about, you know, being in a group scenario. But that one-on-one connection, yeah, can't beat it. me. But let me ask you, do you consider yourself monogamous? I mean, if you're getting in that deep, are you able to keep your emotions out of it, or is it still too early to know? I think it's still

too early to know, but I will say that I can see my emotions getting invested. Yeah. Like I have one of my partners that I'm seeing. I definitely feel intense emotions for, I think, because it's so new. And we have insane sexual chemistry. And I haven't felt that feeling in a few years. And it's just the newness of it all. But there's nothing that trumps that bond and trust that I've created with my primary guy. Yeah. And he's just been so supportive with me, like, through and through.

And it's not like when you did this with your other, your abusive boyfriend. It's not like you went in that text with someone else. felt amazing and then came back and had no connection. You go out and have these other connections with other people, but you come back and you still feel that connection with your guy. It's not like it's lost. Yeah. And sometimes it can be like we'll have really amazing sex because it's also sexy that

we've seen with other people earlier that day. But other times it's just like a really lovely aftercare. Like I come home and I can just, you know, smuggle up to him after I've been kind of used. Used and abused. Yeah. So, yeah, so it's working so far. But I'm aware that it's complicated.

But I mean, you know, you're working through it in a healthier way with somebody who, like you said, is lovely and treats you well and is nurturing and allowing you to go out and figure yourself out as opposed to what was happening before, you know, with that fuck. up guy and you were so fucked up and it was just so messy it's complicated but it doesn't sound dysfunctional anymore it's not there's no darkness it'll be interesting where you are 10 years from now when you work through different things but let me ask you a question because i know that you do start camming and you do only fans you know when and how did this all come into play when in the story did that start so i started camming kind like a few months after that big brink break up with that X. I really leaned into it. I needed the extra money was the main reason, but then I actually just really loved that attention. It was that same feeling of like, you know,

being watched. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And realizing, oh, fuck, like I'm, I'm really hot. And so I really enjoyed that. I don't cam any more specifically because that crazy fucking X trying to docks my What do you mean? And tried to, oh, he figured out my cam name. He was going to, you know, show it to my family. And so I just got freaked out. How much money did you make when you were camming? I always wonder how much they make.

I mean, like, I would love to sit here and be like, oh, my gosh, I made, you know, $10,000 a month. $10,000. It wasn't bad. I mean, like, there were good moments and I had, you know, my. regular food come and give me some tips. But yeah, there were dry days and wet days. But like on a good night, how much would you make? Like a couple hundred bucks?

A couple hundred bucks, yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah, so it's like either bartender or cam, same shit. You're making that kind of money. Yeah, exactly. And like I didn't have any of the crazy gear that some of these other girls have. Well, it sounds like it never lasted long enough.

for you to really make it a thing. No, no. And the only fans thing, I am going to be starting up again soon. Right now I've just been posting to Reddit to kind of get my feelers out there.

What are you doing on your only fans? And what are you going to start there? Start there. Well, my big thing is that, like, I love vintage porno mags. And so my ideal only fans profile would be sort of honing in on that, you know, those old vintage porno mags and separate those images. And I want to like throw it back a little bit.

So you want to recreate those, but you in those pictures. You want to take vintage porn picks of yourself and post it up there and have guys drool of you. But for now, like, I've been, yeah, posting on Reddit. I have a Reddit account. What is your Reddit account? It's Goldie Harlow. Goldie Harlow. Well, nobody knows your name Goldie Harlow.

We didn't say Goldie Harlow in the beginning. Harlow. I like your name. Your boyfriend's down with all of this? Oh, big time. Love that. He loves that. How is his relationships with his other people?

going. I know that you have a non-binary person you're seeing on the side as well as a guy. Who's in his stable of people? So he currently is seeing another non-binary queer person and he has a super big crush on this guy and he's trying to figure out what to do with this crush. But things are going well. I think the one thing that has come up as of recently is like, the question of hierarchy in non-monogamy. What does that mean? It was actually something that we hadn't thought about.

And it was, he had been having this conversation with this partner of his. And they asked, you know, are you seeing this relationship in a hierarchy where Goldie is number one and I'm number two? because like that might not really work for me. Like I really believe that there shouldn't be hierarchy in these sorts of things. And that wasn't something we really thought about because I don't know. For us, we're just like, okay, we're like, we're just, you know. Yeah, let's just do it. It's working.

Yeah, but it is definitely stuff that it comes up, I would assume, eventually. Yeah. And I, and it's a fair question. I mean, like, you know, it would be great if we could completely separate sex some feelings that I just don't buy it. Like eventually, you know, those relationships turn into more than just sex and we have to be respectful of their feelings as well. Yeah, everybody's, you know, I think everyone's wired differently.

I forget what the name is for the wiring for somebody like you. Toronto Unicorn had it too. I mean, she just didn't, she just wasn't down with having sex with just anybody. She needed that connection, whereas I've heard from many people that are the opposite. You know, it can totally just be sex. I think everyone's different, but what's most important is to know thyself. You know, you are somebody that the feelings have to be there. So I think it's somebody like you in a relationship.

It is important to try to figure out as best as possible how it's going to work because it could get super messy and more complicated. if you're not figuring it out because what does happen in a situation like that if you are starting to have feelings with somebody else do you how is your partner going to feel if they are not number one do you want to make that your primary relationship i think those things should be discussed or thought out ahead of time so that someone's not crossing a line without the other person feeling okay with it yeah i i couldn't agree more and i mean like that was something thing we discussed before opening it up that we always come first.

But I think through actually being out there in dating, I'm realizing, oh, maybe it's not that simple. And we need to keep revisiting that idea. Yeah. Because of the other person. Yeah. And because I need the emotional connection to, you know, have sex. Like I can only assume that at some point it's going to come up that, you know, me or my partner maybe feels like, oh, maybe I'm number two right now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what about your guy? When you had those initial conversations, was he like, yeah, I could totally see myself falling for somebody too. Is he like you in that his feelings have to be there as well? He feels similarly to me that we know that our connection is incredibly strong. but he also needs to feel emotional connection and really get along with the person that he's seeing. And he's not super interested in seeing a whole bunch of people. Yeah.

And having one night's dance. Like we like to return to the same people. Yeah. But it's almost like, and we're in this in-between space right now. We're like, oh, I don't know if it's polyamory or. or ethical non-monogamy, like we're not sure what to call it. Yeah, exactly. It's so good that they do have all these crazy names for things nowadays.

I know that people are very anti-it, but I think it does help when you're in situations like this to define it with a label or something. It helps clear it a little bit, even for you, right? I mean, I know that I see those kinds of things as important where you could say like, oh, maybe this is what we're doing and it's a name. And listen, it might grow and change into something else and then it has a new fucking label. And I think that's what people have against labels, you know? But I think if it works at the time to make you feel like, okay, I could just put myself and what I'm doing in a place. It does help the person. I know it's more confusing

for everybody else and everyone's so anti-labels, but I fucking like them. And I get their place and things. I forget what the name of it is that Toronto Unicorn called herself, but it sounds like you. And you could be like Polly five years from now or you guys. You guys could both be totally gay living only with a girl or a guy. You know, who knows what happens. I don't know. I don't know. I mean, like, I think we're also both of the understanding that like no matter what happens, we are there to support each other through it. And we, we have that deep love for each other that, you know, whatever choice is best for us will eventually be okay, even if it's hard. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's great. Yeah. Because, and that's all about that communication. And isn't that what it's all about is just to be with somebody who is very accepting and okay and helping of you to figure out who you are, even if that isn't necessarily going to be the best thing for you guys being together? I think that that's the ultimate way to be spiritually in a weird way is to not think that you have ownership.

I think a lot of times we believe that we do have ownership over other people. And when somebody's path goes in a different direction, we really want to be super negative against the person that maybe left or decided to go someplace else. But why does it have to be so negative? I know it's hurtful and it's hard, like you said, but it doesn't necessarily have to be this awful, terrible, horrible thing where someone's the perpetrator and there's a victim and all that nonsense that's put on

endings and relationships, you know? I mean, like, it all just comes back to that. It's a fear of abandonment. We don't want to be neglected. We don't want to be turned down. Yeah. And the fear is that you're not going to be able to handle it when it does happen. And what the truth is is that everybody can handle it and you will handle it.

You know, when I was younger, I was always super afraid. of entering into relationships. And I think that my fear of commitment was the fear of not being able to handle it when it didn't work out. And when in reality, I handled plenty of things that didn't work out. I'm actually really good at those moments. So I needed to be like, yeah, like, yeah, I know that most things don't last because I'm not fucking dumb. But what I had to need to know is just jump in anyway. Because when it doesn't work out, whenever that happens, you'll work through it and it'll be devastating.

But you'll be okay. And you'll move on. Yeah, and I mean, like, there's no safe way to go about relationships. Exactly. If someone wants to go fuck someone else or go fall in love with someone else, they're going to find a way to do it. Right. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. And I think that it's so great that you and your guy are very open with each other. It is great that you were able to get out of that abusive first relationship and really flip and turn. I mean, I stayed in abusive relationships like most of my life, you know, like over and over again, same fucking crazy bullshit thing. You really evolved fast. Because I do believe that we attract stuff to ourselves depending on where we're at. So, yeah, you attracted that negative relationship to work shit out of yourself, but you were then able to attract a really great guy and you're in a very loving relationship.

And that's a part of your growth. That's where you're at. And I know that you said that you, neither one of you, it seems like likes or nikes or nays. needs variety. Are you still open to meeting other people or do you feel like, oh, this is, this works. I have everything that I need. I'm currently feeling very satisfied with where I'm at and very grateful for what I have with my partners. Does that mean that I wouldn't be open to maybe going on dates? No, because I think that's like a totally other thing, like going on a date and meeting someone and having butterflies is another aspect of non-monogamy that is very attractive to me.

But at the moment, I'm in a place of just having gratitude for what is and not really looking to date right now. Anymore, right. Has he had any experiences with men yet? He has had experiences with men. Actually, we had a pretty wild experience together with me. him and this gay guy that who basically he had never been with a woman and really wanted to try but needed a bi-curious or bisexual man there to kind of be the fluffer.

Oh my God, hilarious. So that happened not too long ago and it was just an absolutely ridiculous and sexy experienced, but he got to have an experience with a gay guy. I got to be, you know, the first for this guy. And it was wild. Oh, wow. So that gay guy always wanted, he was a gold star gay, they call it. I think that's what they call it when they had never been with a girl.

But he had a curiosity to just try it. He did. So I was his first. Oh, yeah. He liked it. Yeah. And that girl that's standing there and all the guys. guys are drooling over her. That part of you, that's like the best thing for you. Oh, I just loved it.

Oh, yeah. Like, I was the first. Wow. Yeah, yeah. And that was his first experience with the guy? That was just one of them. That was just the most recent. And then before him and I had gotten together, he had had some experiences with men, but not very many. And so I think for him, we're he's at right now in his dating journey is he's really looking for a guy that he can date. And hopefully that can be this crush. But we'll see. Yeah, we will see. I'm going to put you down on my list to contact at at the end of the year and see where you guys are at.

Because I feel like you just started to open it up and you've done so much already. But because it's so new, it'll be interesting to see where you're at six months from now and then a year from now. So keep me posted Goldie. Get your fucking Onlyfans up and running so that you. could, you know, cash in on the exposure you're going to get on my show. The great thing about podcasts is they live forever. So it's not like people will only hear it next week.

They'll be listening always. But you get the most downloads in the first month, two months. So try to get that moving. But I will make sure to put your Reddit there. It's Goldie Harlow. Is that how they find you on Reddit? Just put in the name Goldie Harlow? Yeah.

Yeah. And I mean, like, that will be my name on OnlyFans. And if you want, once I have it up, I can send you an email. And I don't know, we can share it or. Yeah, put it in the description. I'm just going to, you know what? I'm going to put it up this week. Of course.

This is what you needed, Goldie. You needed me to be like, you got to fucking do it because what are you sitting on it for? This is the time to do it. This is what it's about. Weren't you the one that was like, oh, is it okay if I promote? Like, are you that person? I was like, yeah, of course. Like, I, of course.

That's what people come on for sometimes just for that. It's okay. Everyone's happy. I get a great story. I get an episode. You get promotion. I'm here to help you out too. You're helping me out by giving me this whole great episode.

You know, I want to help you out. So start your fucking Onlyfans. Throw it up there. So by the time this comes out, people could go sign up. Okay. Yeah, I'm on it. All right. So she's on it.

So listen, I'm not going to edit all this shit out. I'm going to keep it in there. But you heard this first. Let's see how on it she is. Okay. This is airing. soon. So go check out her only fans, Goldie Harlow, and sign up. If she's not up yet, she went back on her word. Exactly. This is the way I do it. This is the way I might fuck myself

to make shit happen. You got to do it now, okay? Because everybody will know. Go make it happen. Thank you so much. No, thank you. Thank you for this whole story. It was super interesting. It's going to air. So you got to get working on your. your only fans and make sure also to go to Reddit and see because people will probably be going there as well to find you and then send me some picks for my Patreon. Okay, I will. All right. Thanks so much.

Thanks for calling in, Goldie. Thank you so much. Bye. Bye. Bye. Hey, everyone. Thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode. If you want to follow the show, follow me at Strict Anonymous on Instagram or Twitter.

That's at Strict Anonymous. If you are on YouTube, make sure to subscribe. I love YouTube as a platform for my show because people comment there. And I try to reply back to every single person who post a comment. So even if you're not listening on YouTube and you want to talk about the show, go to my YouTube channel, subscribe, like and share my videos. It's strictly anonymous podcast. If you want to sign up for my Patreon, on my Patreon, you are not only supporting my show, but you will get these episodes early, ad free. and you get to see anonymous picks of my guests.

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Thanks so much for listening. Okay, I just want to tell you before you go, that my book, it's called Strictly Anonymous Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like, there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a, Cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third

person, and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audio book is available coming out August 25th.

But you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other. way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of

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