Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 555 - Randy and his Wife Play with Others Solo and as a Couple

Episode Date: November 16, 2022

Randy and his wife play with others solo ads and a couple and they called in to talk all about it. When did they open up their marriage? Why did they decide to start playing solo? And, when did Randy realize he enjoyed hooking up with other guys? Tune in for all the details including his ear threesome experiences and why he never had a monogamous relationship, how he met his wife and how they decided on having an open marriage, why they switched fro hooking up with couples to both finding play partners, how he met one of his primary play partners and ow she turned him on to prostate play, how his wife then talked him into pegging, how she then set up his Tinder account and set up his first guy on guy experience and what exactly went down, the MMF threesomes that followed, his type of guy he prefers fro play with as well as his type of female play partner, the rules they set up when thy first started playing and how those changed over time, how his wife started playing solo and why they eventually had to put a stop to it, how and why women have all the power in the lifestyle, how and why guy on guy action is still stigmatized and a whole lot more. **To see anonymous pics of Randy and his Wife Sunny + anonymous pics of most of my other female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the strictly anonymous podcast. Strictly anonymous podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it.

The temptation is just too much. It's real problems. Do your friend know that you're banging her or no? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your freak flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to rehire. your whips and chain. Here is your host, Kathy.

Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast with Kathy. If you want to follow the Strictly Anonymous podcast on Instagram or Twitter, follow the show at Strict Anonymous. You want to be on the show. It's called Strictly Anonymous because everybody is anonymous on my show. I don't even really know who these people are that I talk to. I'm assuming they email me from a phony email. They make up a phony name. And then I make up a phony voice. voice for them. Every single person's voice that you hear is completely changed. Okay, I know they're real voices because I talk to them and they sound nothing like the voices you hear. So if you want to come on the show because you have like a secret naughty life or even an open naughty life that you want to

talk about, but you want to remain anonymous. You could be on the show. You could either send me an email, strictly anonymous podcast at email.com. You could go to my website strictly anonymous podcast.com and click on be on the show or you could follow me on Instagram or Twitter. DM me there. I'm at Stricted Anonymous. Or you could call my Confessions Hotline. That's 347-4-20-3579. That's 347-4-20-3579. You could call that number 24-7. Now, a lot of people email me for advice and stuff like that. I don't give advice via email, but what I do offer for people is a call with me that remains anonymous that I don't air. And typically what people use that service for, it's like a consulting thing. I charge for it. It's like a hundred bucks for 45 minutes. But what people use that line for or use that for is to, because they want advice or they want help for me.

So if you're one of those people, you want advice about a situation, that's what you got to do. Because I can't like write out five paragraph emails. I fucking hate writing. But you know what I love to do is talk. And I love to analyze things, give people my opinions, break something down. solve someone's problem. So if you want to call up and talk to me on the DL, you could do that as well. I don't air those calls. The number, I mean the number. Just email me at Strictly Anonymous podcast at GML.com or, you know, DM me on Instagram and Twitter at Strict Anonymous and

tell me you want the private call and I will send you the link to book. Now, if you're a Patreon member, you get those calls for $75 instead of $100. Now, Patreon is fun. I have pictures of like almost every one of my guests now. And there's hundreds of pictures on there because I've had hundreds of guests on since I've been doing this. It's $5 a month to join my Patreon. You could cancel it anytime you see all my guests. They're anonymous picks, but they're sexy picks. You get all of the episodes early and ad-free. You get Q&A's that I tape every month. Sometimes when someone writes in with an interesting question, I answer it via like an audio thing. So it's kind of fun over there. If you want to join my Patreon, patreon.com slash strictly

anonymous podcast. You also get those calls with me at a cheaper price. I don't like the word cheap, but whatever, it's true. Anyway, today I have on Randy. Now, if you're a listener of my show, you might remember his wife, Sunny. Sunny was on the show. It was episode 519, Sunny and her husband play with others. Well, this is Randy. Randy and his wife, Sonny, play with others.

And he has been playing around since the get-go. Now, if you haven't heard Sunny's episode, I'll put a link in the description, but his episode is awesome. He is, you know, he has this very open marriage with Sunny. The way they have it set up is super interesting. He was a musician. If you remember from Sunny's episode, she always fucked musicians. He was a musician.

So he has, you know, been there, done that. He's been having threesome since the get-go. He talks about that. He talks about how he got into like the swinging lifestyle. But then how he met Sunny and how they don't really consider themselves swingers, but they are open. They do play with others. It's not a cock situation where, you know,

they both get off on the fact that their partner is with someone else, but they're totally open to their partner being with someone else. They have played together with other couples, and they have also successfully played solo. There was a time, and he talks about this. Sadi didn't talk about this, where there was a moment where Sully was playing solo with guys and it was getting to be a little bit too much, he was like, what the F? And they had a whole discussion about it. And they, you know, worked through it. And he talks about that too. He talks about why they decided to go and play solo after playing with couples. He also talks a lot about him hooking up with guys. This is something that he did way later in life. And why his story is so interesting is because this was a guy that would have sworn to you that he was never into guys. He had never tried it. He crossed swords and shit like that. You know, if any,

had the opportunity to try something like that if they wanted to. It would have been him, right? This guy's been fucking a lot of people from the, you know, a long time. But it was really one of his play partners, not his wife, but one of his play partners brought up a little anal play with him and he got into it. And then his wife was like, you know, brought it up. Like, what about the real thing? Because it turns out that she liked to see him with other guy. So then he is like, okay, and he tried it. And he really effing liked it. And it's not something that he does like all the time, but he's done it many times. And he talks about that whole process,

which I think is really interesting. I just reposted an episode that I had on a while ago with Dr. Joe Cort, the guy that says like, oh, you know, you could play with guys and not be by or gay. It doesn't mean anything. It just means like in the moment, you know, I don't know. And it's always so controversial of that whole thing.

So I love to hear from men who are really open about the fact that they hook up with men and they explain how it happened. because so many guys, there's still so much stigma attached to it, and there shouldn't be, okay? And Randy explains all that. He talks about how there is a stigma, even in the lifestyle. You would think those people are the most open-minded, but uh-uh, not to guy on guy action. But he's had it.

He talks about it. He's super cool. He's very open. Like I said, him and Sonny have had this open relationship. They've been very successful at it. And you'll know why after you listen to his story. So I'm going to be right back on with Randy. Oh, wait, wait.

And I have to tell you that I started to ask my Patreon members like, oh, should I get pictures of guys too? You know, because I've only been getting pictures of the women for my Patreon members. But I was like, why am I not getting pictures of guys? So everybody decided that, yeah, why not get pictures of guys? So I'm going to get pictures, okay, of Randy too. And they will be up with my Patreon. So if you want to put a body, faceless body to this episode and see pictures of him,

but also see pictures of Sunny and all my other female guests, join my Patreon. Patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. I will put links to all the stuff in the description. Anyway, I'm going to be right back on with Randy. Hey, Randy, welcome to the strictly anonymous podcast. How are you today, Randy? Oh, I'm doing great. Thank you, Kathy.

You're doing great. Now, listen, Randy, you are Sunny's husband. Sunny came on my show already. She even sent in picks. I don't think she... Episode 159, yeah. No, it can't be 159. It was like probably 4.59, I think. 519, I think.

519. Oh, you have dyslexia like me. Yeah. Okay, so she was episode 519. Now, she had a lot of backstory when she called in to talk about. She was like a groupie. She fucked a lot of guys in bands. And then she met you and you were a guy in a band. And then when you guys got together, you guys had a very open marriage. And you went through a tough time.

a very interesting part of her episode. People want to listen to it because she did make it through that time. You guys did, you know, and that was what she called in about. But what, you know, after we spoke, she said, you wanted to call him because you got, you have your own backstory as well as your own view of your open, swinging relationship with Sunny. So I was like, let's get your story because you were a guy in a band that she met. She was a groupie.

And you were that guy fucking a lot of groupies before. Yeah, that's true. We were in different cities. We were separated by a couple thousand miles. But, yeah, she was living her life down where she was in Southern California. And I was basically living the other side of that life, being the musician that was, you know, taking advantage of the groupies and, you know, enjoying that life from my perspective of it. You know, so we had very similar backgrounds just from different sides of the coin there. But, yeah, you know, we both spent our teens and early 20s kind of playing around in that world.

No, but I want to know you specifically. Forget about Sunny now. People could go listen to Sunny's episode. Now this is your episode. And I want to hear about your story. I know that you did tell me that you and her both had like these very hardcore religion backgrounds, religious backgrounds, right? And you both rebelled.

Okay? So we're going to start there. I think a lot of people in that generation, I'm around that same age. My father was a reverend too. You said your father was a reverend. And I became like very slutty because it's like, if you're going to rebel against your parents, It's like the best thing to do to your preacher father, right? Well, yeah, as a former preacher's kids yourself, you know, you, you,

preachers kids go one of two ways. They either go very religious like their parents or they completely rebel and become those teenagers that, you know, they warn you about. Totally. You were that one. I definitely went out that way. So, yeah, I got, you know, into smoking pot and playing rock music and chasing girls and all this stuff they don't want you to do.

You know, of course, that's exactly what I did. But that world, you know, was your band really big, slightly big? I mean, how were you getting all the groupies? We had regional success later on in my later 20s. I did get offered a recording contract. You know, so we had some success. What enough success to have a lot of girls throwing themselves at you. And like, honestly, I used to fuck guys and bands.

And all you need is town success, okay, to get girls. You don't need that one. I mean, you could just imagine what Motley crew got because guys in my town that had a band got a lot of fucking girls. You know, I mean, just girls like guys and bands, especially in the 80s when I grew up. I mean, that was like my thing for sure. And that was Sunny's thing. You guys met way later, but you started as that guy on the receiving end. Now, did you, was it like all that groupy sex that got you into like a life of swinging and everything?

Like, how did that all start? Well, it started with my first female-female male threesome with a girl that I was seeing at the time. And we had a semi-monogamous relationship, but we were experimenting, and she brought in a friend of hers. And we had our first threesome. And that was my introduction to multi-partner sex and the non-monogamous lifestyle. And I felt very comfortable in that. It was like really natural for me to be in that situation. some guys they get in that situation, it's their dream, and then they can't get it up, you know,

just because it's so overwhelming. But for me, it was very comfortable and very natural. So I just kind of always felt that would be the way for me to live my life because I've seen all these, you know, monogamous marriages fall apart with my friends, parents and things like that. So, you know, comparing the two, I just figured, well, you know, I'm going to go down this path and not the traditional, you know, monogamous marriage path, you know. And so that's how it started for me. me and, you know, being in the music industry, there's plenty of women that want to, you know, hook up with musicians. And I had friends in the music business that, you know, we would share girls or trade girls.

You know, I mean, it was debauchery, you know, for sure. But it was a lot of fun, but it kind of laid that foundation of a non-monogamous lifestyle going forward. But were you the guy that had a girlfriend and said, like, listen, straight up, I'm not going to be monogamous or were you non-monogamous behind someone's back? I mean, no, no. I've never believed in cheating. I've never thought that was an ethical thing to do. And the people that I have, the women that I have had as, you know,

girlfriends or partners that I was going to stay with for a while, I didn't want to do anything that would, you know, betray their trust in me or have that happened to me either. So I was always very upfront, you know, hey, this is who I am. Yep. you know, I can be emotionally monogamous with you, but physically, you know, that's not my path. And you need to be aware of that. And if you're cool with that, that's fine.

If not, you know, this isn't going to work. We should move on. I've always been very upfront about that. Right. And did you find a lot of takers? Not really. You know, I found a lot of takers that were like, you know, well, I don't want to be your girlfriend, but, you know, I'll be around for a little while, you know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I found a lot of those, but there were very few that, you know, we gave it a shot. at being in an actual relationship, but they usually didn't last. You know, women, they have this fantasy of being with a musician right up until they figure out, oh, shit, I'm with a musician. Exactly.

You know, sometimes the fantasy is better than the reality, and they don't realize, you know, how much time and effort it takes to be a proficient musician, how much time away from them that requires. And, you know, that very seldom works out. Right, but it worked out with Sonny. Yeah, but she, you know, she's been around musicians

basically her entire adult life. She knows what they're like. She enjoys that part of them. You know, she understands what it takes to be with a musician. So, you know, when we've later on in life, we're both more mature and ready for something a little deeper, even though

we weren't really looking for it at the time, when we did find each other, it really matched very well because we were in the same space in life at that time. Yeah, I mean, that was the girl you were always looking for, somebody that would be super open to having a very honest, open, non-monogamous relationship. And you guys have done it very successfully all this time.

I think we got lucky with that, though, because I think if we had met earlier in life, we probably wouldn't have been mature enough to make that work. But because we met later in life and she'd had a couple kids and I'd had, you know, several failed attempts at monogamy, you know, we were both at a place of maturity where we understood who we were. We were okay with each other being that way and we wanted to do this together. Right. And now I know you guys are swingers. You got heavily into that world. Did you ever tap into that world before her or is that started when you were with Sunny? I wouldn't say swinging, multi-partner sex or sharing partners with friends and stuff like that did happen when I was playing in bands. But it wasn't, I would say, in the swinging world. It was just, you know, that's the shit that happens backstage. You know, so I wouldn't necessarily call that.

swinging the swinging itself is as far as actually going out and looking for swinging couples and things like that that happened after sunny and i got together right and who's idea was that to get into that world yours or hers i don't really know who brought it up first um you know we talked on the phone together for several months before we met face-to-face and we had talked about all this stuff together because we were both very open about who we were with each other and so i'm not sure who brought up swinging first, but I think, you know, when we had decided, hey, you know, we do want to be together after we had met, I think we both kind of figured that's what was going to, that's how it was going to be anyway because we both acknowledged we were

not monogamous people, you know, so when we figured out, hey, you know, there's something more here between us than just a weekend or a week-long vacation hookup, you know, I think it was just implied that it was going to be that way. your first threesome was with a girl, right? Two girls. And then you did say that you did some swapping, sharing with guys. Did you always have the, like, did you always put it together that you were into watching your partner with someone else back in those times?

Or was it not until you were with Sunny that you really realized that was like a thing? Because I think some guys don't put that together. I enjoyed watching my partners with someone else back then. Okay. I, but I, I found that with Sunny, I really enjoyed it a lot more of one because, you know, I just think she's fucking beautiful. You've seen her pictures, you know, even in her late 50, she's still very, very attractive. Yeah. And, you know, yeah, so I got really lucky there.

But even in the past, I enjoyed watching them, but it's more so with Sunny because of that emotional attachment as well. You know, seeing her having so much pleasure and enjoyment makes me happy for her, you know. Whereas the others, it was. just really fucking hot to watch her fuck. You know, with Sunny, it's much more and deeper. Right. I know that you did play, you guys play solo as well as together.

And one thing I do remember, though, about you on her episode was that eventually you did realize that you were kind of by, I don't know, or if that's the right word now, because I think I use it wrong. Like, maybe heteroflexible. You know, and that was something new that came up way later in your life. Yeah.

Yeah, that's correct. That's something that came along with one of my female play partners several years after we had been together. We got together, yeah. So tell me about your, so you had all these threesomes and swapping stories. Then you meet Sunny and now you just said like, oh, with one of my play partners.

Did you guys, because you guys were playing solo, did you have girls on the side and she was totally cool with it and you saw them separately together? Like, what was that set up for you? Like from your point of view? How it really started is we had been swinging together as a couple for maybe a year, year and a half or so.

Yeah. And we met this couple that we became very close to. And the female and I had a really great sexual connection. She was, you know, as far as play partners goes, she was right up my alley. We really clicked well.

Unfortunately, Sonny and the husband of that couple did not. They like each other as friends and as people, but as play partners, it really wasn't working for them, unfortunately. But because we were all good friends by that point, the female and I were given the okay by our spouses

to continue on being regular play partners. And so for several years, that lady and I had our thing going on. And I did have, I think, one or two other female play partners that kind of came in and out during the time I was with this primary partner. And it was one of these other ones that actually introduced me

to the buy stuff. And how did that come up with that play partner? Well, she was going down on me one time and she gave me the old finger up the backside, right? And started playing with the prostate pain. That old finger up the backside. Exactly, man. That's like the gateway drug, right? So anyway, you know, we had done some things, you know, together before that I had brought up

And she was game to try it. So, you know, I figured I'm at this point, I'm completely 100% hetero, right? I'd never been interested in guys or any anal player or anything like that. 100% hetro guy. And so she does this and I'm like, okay, well, you know, I don't know about this, but I'm going to go with it because she's gone with a couple things I've done. So, you know, okay, we'll just see how it goes. Take it for the team.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. But she started prostate massage and me while she's going down. I mean, it's, you know, felt amazing. of course. And so when we were done, she said, well, you know, I actually have this prostate massage toy at home. Do you mind if I bring it next time? And I said, yeah, absolutely, you know, that felt good. This would probably feel better. And it did when she tried it. And so then she wanted, next time she wanted to try a full-on vibrator. So, and it just progressed from there. And eventually

she was going to buy a strap on and try pigging. And so, okay, well, next time we'll try that, you know. In the in-between time, I'm communicating. all this with Sonny because we know we're very open with what we do with each other. Yeah. And she's like, well, shit, that sounds like fun. I want to try that. So we went out and bought a rig and, you know, she, uh, she paid me that night. And it was freaking amazing.

Uh, yeah. And so, uh, after a few times being paid, Sunny and I, uh, she said, well, if you think that feels good, you should try a real one. Who said that? Wait, Sunny. Sonny said that's me, yeah, right after she'd been done pigging me. I didn't realize it was her, yeah. Yeah, it was her.

And so a week or so goes by, and I'm kind of thinking about it, I'm going, well, holy shit, you know, that was amazing. What she just did and he felt incredible. And she says, a real one feels even better, hmm. You know, and I'm a pretty open guy. You know, I don't really put labels on things, but I've never been that way, but I've never thought about it, you know, so now I'm thinking about it. And I'm like, well, fuck, how will I know until I'm not?

I try it, you know. So I figured I'll try it, see how it goes. Well, I found this guy and, you know, with Sonny's approval, and she actually set up my grinder account where I found the guy. So we go off and he and I do our thing, and lo and behold, it was really enjoyable. It was different. You know, it's not something I would like crave like they do with women, but it was a lot of fun. And it felt really natural and you know nobody was more shocked about that than i was but you know it actually went really well and so i told sunny about it and she said well you know knock yourself out guy you know have fun and so this guy and i started seeing each other uh you know for a while and then uh we were in the hot tub one night and sunny came home from what she was doing and started chit-chatting us up

while sitting next to the hot tub and then she eventually got in the hot tub and next thing you know the three of us are having fun together and then that continued on for a couple of years uh so yeah it's it's that's how all that started um was her just giving me you know the permission to see if a real one was as good as she said it was right there you go and even it was really the first girl that put the finger up your ass sunny had never tried that before i had never had that done to me before uh no yeah so that yeah yeah that secondary play partner that I had at the time. Yeah, she really opened that door for me.

You're right. She started with her. Yeah, and it turns out, I mean, that Sunny enjoys that watching you, correct? Yeah, yeah. And she actually was, you know, later on, she started to participate. But, you know, the weird thing was, is I was really kind of, it was difficult bringing it up to her when I had thought about it. You know, after she said, you should try a real one. and I had thought about it for a week or two.

I was really scared to bring it up to her that I was actually interested in trying it. Because earlier in our relationship, we had talked about Biman, and she'd had a really bad experience. And she was like very anti-bi guys. Oh, God, no. Oh, really? Yeah. So I was very, very, you know, scared to bring that up with her. But I figured, you know, we've always been open and honest. I don't want to keep this a secret from her.

Yeah. You know, and she may say, no, that's gross. Don't ever do that. in which case I would respect that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But she surprises the crap out of me. She said, well, yeah, go for it, dudes. You know, I enjoy occasionally being with a woman,

so I'd be a hypocrite if I said you couldn't try a guy, you know, so knock yourself out, see how it goes. So, you know, that was pretty scary thing, but, you know, it turns out it really led to some wonderful times. Yeah, but let me ask you this, because you said that she did say that she had a bad experience with the guy. Was it just the guy in general, Or did she think that she wasn't into by guys?

And then she realized she was when she saw you with the guy? No, I think she'd had a bad experience with two guys in a threesome situation. And it kind of, I don't know what it was, she never really went into detail about it. But she said it really turned her off to buy guys. Right, right, right. So, you know, several years later in our relationship, I'm thinking, God, I want to tell her I want to try bisex, you know. Yeah. Holy shit.

I know what her thoughts are on that. Oh, geez. you know, so that was a scary proposition. And now how many guys have you been with since? Because I know that you said it's not always on the menu, but every now and then. Yeah. I would say at this point probably maybe half a dozen guys. Uh-huh.

You know, like I said, that one guy that I first started with, that went on for a couple of years. And particularly with the MMF threesomes with Sunny, those were some really good times. He eventually found a girlfriend and he went away. Yeah, I was going to ask if he was married or anything. He was a single guy when you met him. Yeah, he was a single guy, but he found a gal, and she was not in the lifestyle. And so that had to come to an end. But there's been a few other guys.

There's been a couple. You know, it was just him and I for, you know, however many times we saw each other before that, you know, when it's ran its course. And then there's been a couple others that Sonny and I, you know, have had threesomes with. But yeah, it's not something that happens all the time. And it's got to be, you know, I'm pretty picky about my partners, both male and female. So it's got to really, he's got to meet the criteria. That's been difficult to find. Oh, okay.

So what is that criteria for guys? And then I want to hear what you dig in your female partners. Okay. Well, the criteria for guys is, you know, I don't like the really effeminate guys. And I don't like the big hairy guys. You know, just normal blue collar type guys are the ones that, you know, I find myself. connecting with more than the others. And I prefer that they be verse,

that first guy that we had a two-year relationship with and doing threysms. He was only a top. Oh, okay. That got old after a while for me. I wanted more of a verse situation. So I'm, you know, I'm not going to be with just the top or just the bottom anymore.

And verse means that, yeah, verse means the guy will top you or also allow you. to top him and be a bottom. I mean, it's switch versus same shit, right? Yeah. Correct. Yeah, that's exactly it. So I want it to be a more of an all-inclusive thing instead of a one giving one receiving thing.

Yeah, because I would think for a guy that's into fucking girls and guys that he'd want to fuck a guy in the ass too as well as get fucked in the ass. Like, I could, right? I don't know. Because a lot of times in the gay community, people are either one or the other. I mean, I think more people are either top.

or bottoms and then you have the verse people, but that's not a big population. Exactly. Right? But in the, in the heteroflexible world, I would assume more people that are down for both would probably be more likely to be versed. Don't you think? Yeah. Yeah, I would think so too.

But you're right. It's a much smaller pool to choose from, you know, because there's not a lot of them are verse. You know, like you said, they're either one or the other. So that's a much smaller pool to choose from. and then, you know, having the physical things that I'm attracted to on top of it even shrinks the pool even more, you know. Right. So it's proven to be fairly difficult, which is probably why those numbers are lower than they are, or should be, you know, or I would like them to be.

You know, at least on that side, when it comes to women, my requirements are not as strict. I think all women are beautiful in their own way, as long as I like them as a person and we click sexually. you know, I'm good with that. And once I find a person like my primary play partner that I had, I'm not a greedy guy. I don't have to have a whole stable of gals. One primary one, maybe a secondary one, I'm great. You know, I'm perfectly fine.

I'm much more into quality over quantity, always have been. You know, I had my quantity earlier in my 20s playing in the rock bands. I had quantity galore. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That taught me that. I need to find quality. This quantity is getting really kind of, you know, passe. Yeah, but, you know, the computer geek from high school is like, fuck you.

Like, I've never had quantity. You know what I mean? Like it's probably a very nice feeling to be the type of guy that is okay with, you know, quality over quantity because I think every guy has that sort of natural urge for that quantity, but some guys never get to fulfill those fantasies. Most guys don't, I don't think. But I think, you know, you did and you were allowed to have all that, that it makes sense. I look back on the things I've done in my life and I've thought those very thoughts that you just heard there. And, you know, yeah, there's a lot of men out there that would kill to live the life that I've

lived. So I do consider myself very lucky in that respect. Yeah, and that's why you could like sort of relax into it and now be a little bit more. I mean, you say you're not picky, but you don't need as much. And it's because you had your fill, whereas, you know, the real bad guy to wind up with, I think, for women. I mean, I think if you're, you know, fishing out of an older pond, you want the guy that's fucking been there, done that, okay? Because that guy most likely has got it all out of a system. Most guys have it in their system. Well, and the nice thing about that is, you know, having gone through the quantities. Yeah.

And the disappointment in that quantity is really what changed the attitude is. You know, I've been with some extremely beautiful women, women that have been in, you know, later on in magazines as models and things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gorgeous women. And they're really not that great a bet for most parts I found out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Tell the guys.

Explain. It's the girl next door. It's the plain janes that will rock your world, you know. I found, you know, Sunny, who I think is both gorgeous and, you know, a dynamite partner in bed. But, you know, from the quantity of the women that I had earlier, most of that was just they were all looks and nothing else. Interesting. It wasn't all that great, you know. So I think that experience, though, you know, and having had those opportunities did lead me down the path to, okay, well, I need more quality than the quantity.

Once you do find the ones that you do click with, you really appreciate that a lot more than having this big stable of women that don't really do it for you. Yeah, well, that's more like how women are, I think. Yeah, and eventually guys, if you have any brains in your head, you'll eventually get there too. Or you fucked enough girls, okay? We still got to remember that that's easier for you to say

because you had that quantity. And you learn through fucking like tons of girls If you had to put a number to it, I don't know how many girls it is, but maybe it's in the hundreds of... It's in the triple digits, yeah. Right. But a lot of guys aren't there, you know? So I always feel like there's some guys listening like, oh, easy for you to say, you know.

But, you know, there are guys that have had those same experiences as me that they're still there. They're still wanting the quantity and not the quality. Yeah, you're right. You do have to have those experiences and then reflect on what those experiences have got you. Some guys don't do the reflection part. Yeah, and I do think that we all sort of have a big vapid hole inside of ourselves at some point in our life, more so when we're younger. And that tends to get filled up and you become a little bit more at peace when you get older. Hopefully, I think that's

a natural thing that's supposed to happen in life. And so I think we all sort of chill out a little bit on chasing the dragon. And the people that don't are the ones that, I mean, you shouldn't, if you're still chasing the fucking dragon in your 50s, like maybe something, maybe you need to tend to something, you know? Exactly. And unfortunately, I do know people that are still there in their 50s. Yeah.

And that might be a problem. You know, you're trying to scratch an inch, itch. And maybe it's not an itch. Maybe it's issues. You got to 25 years old and stayed there. Right. Yeah. So wait, so let's get back to your story.

So you always have, because you're talking about primary and secondary, Sonny isn't your primary. Primary is a girl separate from your wife, correct? Correct. Right. Correct. Yeah. So you always have Sunny there and she's down for you to have primary, secondary, secondaries,

whatever you want on the side. I mean, that's how your open marriage is set up, right? Correct. Why don't you remind us how, you know, how you guys have work things out between the two of you? Well, it started out. We were doing this strictly as a couple. She had her rule. There was going to be no kissing.

We're not going to get any emotional involvement. None of that. It's just, you know, bang and go. Yeah. And, yeah, the whole no kissing thing lasted about 30 seconds with our first couple. I remember that with her. Yeah, she was right on the money with that. We were at a house party.

It was the first time we'd ever gone out intentionally to swing together as a couple. Yeah. We went to a house party. and a lot of really great people, you know, sex positive-minded, really great people, but none of them are really physically doing it for us. But we were enjoying the evening, you know, and then this couple walks through the door and, you know, their head and shoulders attractively above the rest of the crowd. And they saw us and it was like, you know, they just got us in their sights and locked and loaded. We were going to go in the back with them, whether we liked it or not, kind of seemed like. and that's exactly what happened.

We kind of went in the back rooms with them, and we all started doing our thing. And, you know, like I said, you know, kissing will last at about 30 seconds, and that was out the window. Who broke at both of you at the same time? Pretty much, yeah. I think both of these couple,

this couple were very attractive and much more experienced than us as far as, you know, playing together. Yeah. And they just kind of took the lead, and they just kind of both leaned in and started Macin' on us. And, you know, okay, well, I guess we're Macin. You know, it's kind of how it went. So, you know, it was fun foreplay, and we talked about it later on.

You know, hey, we have this rule. We broke it. You know, you have to talk about these things. And we both said, well, yeah, but it was really nice. It was, you know, a really good foreplay and kind of, you know, set the mood. So, yeah, overall, okay, well, we'll just do away with that rule then it doesn't really apply. Right. So you started out, you're strictly playing as a couple.

And then how did it evolve into playing solo? Well, as we got into swinging, you know, we had some friends that we swung with, but finding really four-way compatible couples is extremely difficult. Yeah, I've heard that many times because everyone has to be attracted to everybody. Exactly. You know, you have to like each other. If I'm going to let some man be with my wife, I have to actually like the guy. Yeah, yeah. Some guy I think is a jerk be with, you know, the love of my life.

But she also has to be attracted to him. Exactly. And then vice versa, on their side. I know. It's a lot of people. Two couples is not twice as hard as skating a single. It's four times as hard as skating a single. Right.

Exactly. And so after a lot of frustration and disappointment, we decided, well, you know, I had, you know, this female from this couple that we got close with as my primary partner. I had that thing going on. And so she was getting frustrated. And so I said, well, you know, let's try, you know, getting some single guys involved in this for you, you know, so that you can have your phone on the side. I am with my primary play partner, you know. And so she found a guy and I met him. And he's a really nice guy, really funny, you know, good looking guy.

And him and I got along great. So, you know, yeah, I said, yeah, I would feel comfortable with this guy being your partner. You know, and so they had their time. They clicked really well sexually. You know, so he was around for a while. And she had a couple of the guys, you know, kind of secondaries like I had. And, you know, she started building her. little stable of guys that she would rotate.

Because, you know, some guys, you know, they find girlfriends and drop off or, you know, schedules just don't match up. So it's, you know, she preferred to have, you know, a few guys that she could choose from were, you know, my primary play partner and I had really set up a schedule and we knew, you know, each other's availability and it was working for us. So, you know, for her, it was a little more difficult with the guys that she was with. Now, because you're playing solo, so you guys were getting satisfied.

by these other partners as well. But is there an aspect for the both of you, I forget what Sonny said to this, but for you to know when Sunny is out with a guy, if you're home, are you like anticipating like her coming back and telling you what happened? Is it that kind of a thing,

like a cuckled scenario that gets you guys turned on? Or is that not a part of it? No, no, not really. I mean, we do share some things that, you know, are going on. Like I, you know, had told her about the strap on that, you know, my secondary partner was going to bring over the next time she was over.

So, you know, we do share some things, but it's no, I don't want to play by play. And I'm not going to sit there and jack off while she's told me about it. No, it's nothing like that. Yeah, because that's like a big fan. Like that's a big thing for some guys. So that's a very big difference. Like he. Yeah.

And most of the time she actually didn't go out of the house. She brought them to our house. And either I was there or I would give them time alone if it was a guy, you know, if it wasn't a new guy, if it was a guy, I didn't trust it. I could leave him alone. but if it was a new guy, I preferred to be there in case, you know, the guy turned up to be a cycle or something. But, you know, once he gained my trust, I would give them their alone time just as she would do for me and my primary partner. So, yeah, but that's how all that started.

And, you know, it worked for a while, but then she started getting a little out of hand and I had to reel her in and that presented its own issues. What do you mean she got a little off of hand? I don't remember that from her episode. You tell me your version of her the story. Well, she was at that point really getting into the quantity and not the quality. Oh, interesting, Sonny. I don't remember this part. Uh-huh.

Yeah, it was getting a little much in my eyes, and it was starting to really take away from the time that we still had together, you know. And I started feeling like she was putting more emphasis on the lifestyle than our relationship. You know, and at that point I said, you know, wait a minute. This is starting to not feel right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You need to talk about this. And there was a little bit of a, you know, rebellious attitude coming from Sunny on that.

And that got, you know, a little messy for a little while. But, you know, at the end of the day, you know, we love each other. And that's the most important thing. And we worked through it. And we found a solution that worked for both of us. What was the solution? Well, the solution was, you know, we, one, wanted to start trying to do this together again because we hadn't done anything together in a long time, you know, several months to over a year

since we'd done anything as a couple with another couple. So we said, okay, well, let's go back into that world, try that again. You can keep your primary. I'll keep my primary. And then we'll start doing this as a couple again as well. Yeah. And we did. And we had some success there.

And we, you know, some of those couples were still in contact with, even if we don't play with them anymore. We still are in contact with them because they're our friends, you know. So wait, so did you find another couple? Because, I mean, the reason why you stopped doing it together was it was hard for you to get everyone to a lineup. Were you able to find another couple to play with? We did find a couple couples that I wouldn't say it was a perfect match. Yeah.

But it was an acceptable match. It was one that we could both be okay with. Right. You know, finding that perfect four way, I think, is, you know, we're still looking for that. Yeah. You know. The unicorn. We do have a couple friends along the way that we really enjoy their company.

You know, the sex is pretty good. It's enjoyable. You know, it's better than sit around watching TV on a Saturday night. Yeah. You know, so we still enjoy those times together even now. You know, but we started trying to focus more on doing that as a couple again, you know, like as it began. Because, yeah, like I said, she was going a little bit too far out into left field to the point of it was becoming detrimental to our relationship. And, you know, once that happens, no, you know, we need to make an adjustment here because

this relationship is what's important. The lifestyle is fun. It's entertainment. It's, you know, it's not what's important to us. And we need to get back to focusing on that. And what was it? So I know that you said it was like it was just too much quantity for her. She was getting caught up in that. Like, was she out every single night meeting guys, like always on her phone and or like, what was it that was happening that made you realize like, oh, so things for. fucking up here. Yeah. Like you said, a lot of it

was the phone thing. She was always texting, you know, multiple guys at, you know, one time. Yeah. She wasn't out with guys every night, but it was, a lot of work. Often enough.

It was often enough to where I thought it was a bit excessive. And, you know, when our sex life starts suffering because she doesn't have time. Yeah. You know, or energy or, you know, whatever the case may be,

you know, hold on a minute. You know, I'm your number one here. You know, I'm, I'm your husband. You know, so, yeah, I'm going to reassert my place in your life here. I think that's very important in these kinds of relationships because that's the difference between making, you know, that kind of thing will break a couple up, a marriage up, you know, especially if you didn't say something about it.

And I think it's interesting that as the man, that it was the man that stood up and said that. Because you would think most people would say, right, if I didn't tell you the sex of the people in this story but told you the story, they would just assume the person that was home saying, oh, stop fucking all these people. It would be the woman's at home saying that and the man has too much quality. But you guys was the opposite.

And I think that that's, of course that happens, you know, but I think it's interesting for people to hear because I think that people think that would never be that way. Am I making sense? I think that actually happens more often than people think because of lifestyle. What I've found is, you know, It's kind of a goofy saying, but it's kind of true. It's a man's world, but it's a woman's lifestyle.

Oh, interesting. I didn't know that. Yeah. Have all the power. Women have all the power in the lifestyle. Oh, yeah. They make the decisions. Us guys are just along for the right.

Believe me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Women have all the power in the swinging world. Guys are just happy to be there. Okay, so like what sense and like explain that further? Well, you know, like go to go to any swinger club. They have ladies night or, you know, pretty much any party. Women get in half price or free.

Single guys have to pay double if they're even allowed at all. Yeah. You know, women get to decide if you're going to have sex or not. It's not the man's decision. It's absolutely the woman's decision. You know, they can say no at any time. And that's no is no. No questions asked.

They don't have to explain why they said no. It's just no. You know, yeah, women get to make the calls and they get all the power. And, you know, it's because in the sexually charged environment like swinging clubs are, women need to feel safe. Yes. You know, because they're around a bunch of horny guys, you know, so they need to feel safe. And the way they feel safe is in this community, in the swinging lifestyle, women have the power. Right.

That's how they're safe because they rule. Yeah, but some horny guy, though, but some horny. very fucking smart guy realize that that's the way you play the game okay with women. Exactly. Give her the power. She'll like let her run with that and you're going to get a lot more than the opposite. Yep. Yep. It was a very smart man.

Yeah. You know, thank God for him because he was absolutely correct. Yeah. Yeah. Because then you have these women that are able to really come into their own and do all the things that maybe other women are afraid to do because they don't trust the situation because they don't believe that they don't feel like they have the power and they don't have it. But in that world, it's given to them and they could be so they, and then what do you get

just completely sexually liberated women that you just typically don't find anywhere else. That's where they are. Yeah. And it's it and it's all because that's a safe environment for them. Yeah. And they feel safe to let themselves, you know, let their inner slut come out. Yes. You know, and play.

And, you know, us guys just really celebrate that for them, you know. But you know what's not. with the world that it's not good for or the people that it's not good for the most is the by guy i've heard that across the board i mean it still is not it's still there is a stigma even in the sexually open-minded world of swinging yeah by men are still a pariah it's still a very large stigma although that is starting to go away with this younger crowd that are coming up yeah yeah they're they're a bit more open about that and a bit more accepting of that but um you know we're in our 50s and the crowd that we know

that's still very frowned upon. Even though I think it's probably more prevalent than anyone would know. I think so. It's because it's such a hush-hush thing. We don't know. Because all those people grew up in the time when we were growing up,

people in their 50s and we were growing up, there was a big stigma for anyone to be anything other than heterosexual. And then somewhere like in the 80s, it was like really cool for a girl to like fucking girls. But that wasn't even the case before.

then, you know, that changed for women while, you know, while I was growing up, but it still has not changed for guys. It's just starting to change for guys so many years later. Like, what are we like 30 years later? Now it's starting to be acceptable for guys. But how could you say that it's, I have such stupid comments I hear from my guy friends. Like it's more natural for women to be interested in women because they have like sexier bodies or these weird sayings that people think that are true.

it's like why wouldn't there be just as many bisexual, not bisexual, what's the right word, but just like as many guys that are into guys as there are women that are interested or curious about playing with women. I mean, come on. Well, I think any guy that actually says that has never had his prostate stimulated.

Or he's always having it stimulated and he just doesn't want to talk about it. Give me a fucking break. I've always felt like they're just like, I think that there's a lot of guys, even in your world, the ones that you would think would be totally cool with being open because they're so open and you're in the Swinger World that still can't cop to it because of the stigma and the stigma alone.

The stigma was taken, when the stigma was completely taken off for women, every girl was like, I got a girl crush. I have a girl crush. Like everybody, you know, it became like the norm. That's what it needs to become about guys. And then you're getting all the ones like the younger kids, just admitting they're fucking into it. Who cares? It's matter.

Yep. Yep. I think we're going to watch that whole thing happen again with the guys in the next decade or so. Yeah. And then you're going to get just as many guys that are over. I think that there's a spectrum. Of course there's some people that are totally hetero and some people that are totally homo.

But most people, you know, fall someplace in the middle. It's like statistics. I just don't think that you're going to find most people on the total end of any spectrum. I think most people fall in the middle. And they might not even know that there's somewhere in the spectrum until they try it. Like you?

I was totally hetero until I said, well, hell, I'm going to give it a shot and see what happens, you know. And then I found, oh, okay, I am in the sliding spectrum. Isn't that interesting? Yeah, I had a great, I had a great story. A guy called it and I made it like an audiogram on my thing. So like it was just so funny the way he told the story.

He was like, you know, he was a major swinger doing all kinds of crazy things. I never been with a guy. Never even thought about it. But he was like at a swinger house party one day and everyone like was passed out. And it was just like him and this other guy left standing. And the guy like looked over at him and is like, hey, you want a blowjob? And he was like, no man. I'm not into it.

He's like, why don't you just try it? And he was like, okay. And then he did it. He's like, it felt fucking good. So, you know, whatever. just a very chill laid back thing. It just happened and he tried it and it was great. So I'm always like, you don't know, you know, until you know.

Yeah, and it probably shocked the hell out of him just like you did me. You know, nobody was more shocked than me that I actually enjoyed it. But, you know, there you go. Yeah, I mean, and you were a guy that was around, I mean, you probably crossed swords in your life, all that sharing and having all these groupies and. There was incidental contact, yeah. That's what I mean. And so, like, it would have come on maybe, I mean, you're not hiding the fact that you were secretly thinking about Dix all this time, but you didn't.

I mean, you really had no desire, never thought of it before. No, no, not before that partner, you know, started that whole path. Right. And you're here to say that, you know, you would even be surprised that if someone told you 20 years ago that you'd be into guys. Oh, yeah, no, no, yeah, this started when I was in my late 40s. So, you know, it's been, what, 10, 11 years since that happened. So, yeah, until then, I was completely straight and never crossed my mind, wasn't interested in trying it. Yeah.

And, you know, once I did, found out, okay, yeah, I guess I am, you know, I'm more close to one side of the scale than the other, but I am in that sliding scale. And that shocked the hell out of me. And Sunny, too. She likes to hang out with a girl every now and then. You guys are probably very similar. Very similar. Maybe do you think where you are on the spectrum? She's probably

closer to hetero than I am. Okay. Yeah, she's very much more about the guys than women. As a matter of fact, I've only seen her in the 22 years we've been together. I've only seen her with two women once each. Right. So it's not something that she does often.

You know, and it was just basically it was the situation more than anything. It's not like she went looking for a girl. It was the situation we were in and it just kind went there. Yeah, it just happened. Now, I know that you did tell me before we started taping that there were some things in her story timeline. I don't know that.

You wanted to get straight. I mean, if anyone listened to Sunny's story and now they're hearing Sunny's husband's story, what is the difference, or what did you think is the difference or what she got wrong or you wanted to clear up from her? Timeline? Yeah. Yeah, the timeline was, she said it was

like 10 years after we first moved in together that we started swinging. It actually happened much sooner than that, we kind of slowly ramped into it. It wasn't something. We just jumped into the deep end of the pool. But it started about, I'd say, three or four years in our relationship, not 10. Yeah, that's a big difference.

Yeah. By 10 years, we were in the deep end of the pool. You know, we were full on swingers by then. So that was a bit of a timeline difference that I thought was different. And then also when you brought up the pegging, she talked about how she kind of discovered her Dom side. Dom might be a bit strong for how we actually engage in paging. It's more about just a role reversal thing.

Yeah. She doesn't really dominate me. She doesn't time me up. She doesn't humiliate me while she's doing it. It's just a different way to bring me pleasure. You know, prostate orgasms are very long and very intense and very different from an ejaculation. So it's just a different way for us to have pleasure together. And she really enjoys being the giver of the pleasure instead of the receiver,

because usually it's the man, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And providing, you know, so she enjoys that role reversal and that to her. You know, yeah, you do have to surrender yourself as a man. You have to surrender yourself to your partner to receive that. But you don't feel, you're not taking it like a sub is what you're saying. No, no.

There's no real Dom sub thing. Although I'm sure she feels powerful while she's, you know, in the act of paying me. Or how can you not, you know? Yeah, that's interesting. So it's a powerful, you know, dominant feeling. but there's not any real, you know, dom-sub dynamic between us. It's more, you know, this is just a different way for us to have sex.

Right. Yeah, that's interesting because you would think, but I wonder, like, just because someone feels like a dom, that doesn't necessarily mean that the other person has to be the sub. You know, maybe for her it is a very dominant position for her. Like you said, she feels that way, but you're not taking the opposite role. You're not feeling like you're a sub.

It's just another way for you to get off, it feels really fucking good. Right. Yeah, I wouldn't say I'm submissive, although you do have to, you know, open yourself up and be vulnerable and you have to surrender yourself to whatever your partner is going to do to you

because, you know, when she's in that position, she has, you know, she's not gentle and slow at first. She can hurt me, you know, because I could do her, you know. Yeah. So you have to be, you have to be vulnerable and open yourself up and submit to that, you know, but it's not in a submissive sense.

You know, you just, you have to be able to open yourself up to be receiving. Do you do oral too? What do you mean? Like, will you go down on a guy, give him a blowjob? Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, yeah.

I just had a funny conversation about swallowing with somebody, and I'm just, so I'm just going to ask you, like, do you swallow? I've only done that with one guy, and that was that guy that we had the two-year threesome relationship with. Yeah. I did that with him one time. He and I were doing an oral exchange, and he had actually, I had ejaculated inside Sunny in one of our threesome's,

and he had gone down on her right after. Yeah. And so, you know, several weeks later, he and I are doing this oral exchange before Sunny got home. And, you know, he told me he was getting ready to come, and I just said, you know, go for it. And I'd never done that before, so I wanted to experience it at least once, you know. Yeah, yeah.

I did it. And, yeah, it was all right, you know. Mm-hmm. It's not horrible. It's not awesome. It was just kind of there, you know. I didn't have a problem with it. We had tests and we knew we were clean, so all that was okay.

But that's the only time. It's the only time I've ever done that. The only time you ever swallowed or the only time you gave a blowjob? Only time I've ever swallowed. Oh, okay. I've given lots of blow jobs, but I haven't swallowed. So wait, so what are you, my whole thing always, because I always swallowed, whatever. And I'm always like, what do people do when they don't, you know?

So when you're giving all these other blow jobs that you've given, is it that you just like let them jerk out, like come all over someplace else or something like that? Or are you putting it in your mouth and spitting it out? You're not doing that, right? No, no. Usually they just come on my chest. Right, right, right, that kind of thing. Yeah.

So how many people do you have in rotation right now? Did I ask that question yet? That'll be my last question. How many, like, do you have somebody and she has somebody? I know, like, what was so great about Sunny's episode, and I did get a lot of people commenting on this, she went through menopause, and it was really hard for her. I mean, there was a time where she just really wasn't into sex.

She felt very guilty about not being into it. She felt very bad for you as well as for her. And then she found her way out of it. And people need to go listen because I thought it was a very inspiring and hopeful part of her story. And a lot of people wrote in because of that part. You know, and she came out of it. And she couldn't take hormones because she had some stuff going on. And she found natural stuff.

Okay. She talks about it and gives the names of it. That really changed the game for her and for you guys. And you guys are back. at it and started back at it again. Now, so what's going on with you guys now? Do you have partners on the side, swinging, going to clubs? That primary partner that I had spoken about earlier, the wife from that couple, she and I are no longer seeing each other. That brineette's course and ended. And I continued on with my secondary for another several years until she had a family

emergency in a different city and she had to move there and take care of a relative that had been badly injured in a car crash. And so I still see that partner a couple times a year when she comes over to visit her daughter that lives nearby. And so, you know, I still see her a couple times a year, but it's not like it was, you know, before it was, you know, once or twice a month we were getting together. Yeah. So that's, that side, the single thing has kind of gone away for me. It's completely gone for Terry. She hasn't had a single guy in several years. We do have a couple that we play with fairly regularly right now. You know, we really enjoy their company.

They're a lot of fun to be with. Sex is pretty good. They're not a perfect couple, but, you know, we do really have a lot of fun with them. And we're still looking for other couples. And, you know, singles are not off the table. Yeah. I know right now after the big reset with COVID and all that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So he really wants to spend more one-on-one time or doing it together. And, you know, she doesn't like our time apart. but I think that might be changing here pretty soon just because we're starting to find those old frustrations with finding the perfect couple again those are starting to come back Yeah You know that never goes away so

And what about swingers parties or clubs? Do you go to any of the do you do that kind of stuff together? Not really we don't we don't do the clubs We haven't done the club in several years Just because you know like I said the crowd's getting a lot younger They're getting a lot more poly oriented And we're not poly at all You know we're doing it's

That's interesting. We're kind of getting to be the old couple at the club, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, we're approaching 60 here pretty soon in another couple of years. So, you know, it's just not really our scene anymore. Yeah. We have gone to a house party or two now and again. Saw some old friends, you know.

That was good to see them. You know, but, yeah, mostly we're just doing our thing here at home with, you know, this other couple that we found. And, you know, I have my secondary partner that I still see a couple times a year. Right now, this is kind of where we're at. Yeah, listen, where you're at is great. Where you've been is amazing. Like I said before, there's a lot of guys that wish they could be you. I mean, uh... I'm just glad to be where we're at right now considering the menopause that she went through. Yeah. We didn't know how long or if she would ever come out of that. And the fact that she did, you know, it was fantastic because it was, that was a rough, you know, four and a half, five years there that, you know, it was sex and maybe once a year and it was lackluster at that. And, you know, it's like, this is the love of my life. best friend, my most incredible sex partner ever, and nothing, just dead. You know, it was like,

I think she even mentioned it was, it was like grieving the loss of a loved one, you know. It's like, it was just from 100 miles an hour to nothing in like just a couple months. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just almost, it was shocking, you know, and it just really kind of grew into a tailspin there for a while, but, you know, our love for each other never wavered. I was never, you know, I know she expressed, you know, concerns that I was going to leave her for the way. wasn't getting enough sex, especially with my secondary partner moving away. You know, it was a pretty dry spell there for a while. And she expressed concerns that I was going to leave her.

And that was never going to happen. She's the love of my life and my best friend and I would never abandon her ever. And I had to, you know, constantly reiterate that to her, you know. But I was going through my own struggles with it as well, being a sexually active guy. And, you know, she was her libido. disappeared, but mine didn't. You know, so that was pretty rough for me, too. And, you know, so it, you know, I think, you know, she mentioned that, you know,

we went through this together and it really is, it affects the husband as well. You know, I know it physically affects her more than the man, but the man emotionally and, you know, his own physical sexual means, that takes a hit too. Oh, please. That's all, no, what I loved about Sonny's episode the most was that for the first time I was hearing the woman's perspective of that scenario. I'm always hearing from the guy that's talking like you are. I talk to many men that are in love with their wives, but they haven't gotten fucked or laid or blown for, you know, the past five, ten years. These are real monogamous guys.

They don't want to do something else. Some of them have gone to cheating. Some are at the verge. Some don't know what the fuck to do, you know. And what was great I thought about Sonny's episode. not only was the fact that she had a happy ending and she talked about how she changed that game and it wasn't just a hormone solution because a lot of people cannot take hormones. They're afraid of hormones. There's a lot of controversy. The fact that she did it naturally, I thought was amazing and such a great thing to put out there because word of mouth is much better than like a fucking Google article you could read. But the other thing was that it was how the woman feels in that scenario. I think sometimes people think, like men think, women just don't care and they don't give a shit and they're being selfish when they don't want to have sex.

But she talked about how awful she felt and the guilt she felt that she knew she wasn't doing it, but she couldn't change that in herself. So I just thought it was so amazing because I think sometimes people vilify women in those situations or they just see them as, like I said, being manipulative or not really wanting to or. You know, and she really explained it from that point of view, which I thought was very important. Because it is a very common problem, especially in what you were going through. Of course. But it does not to say that the woman wasn't. Yeah, and that's amazing. She expressed her guilt to me.

Yeah. Yeah. So I knew what she was feeling. And I felt bad for it because, you know, this was a highly sexual woman as well. And she, her sex alike disappeared on her too. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to say. I felt bad for her as well. Yes.

but so many women don't. I just felt like Sunny was talking for so many women out there that don't have that voice. She was saying what all these women are feeling, but they don't either know it or they don't express it or they don't talk about it anymore, you know? And I thought that that was so important.

There's so many, and I thought it was great because I thought so many women are going to hear that and be like, oh my God, and so many men are going to listen to that and be like, oh, you know what? Maybe my wife does feel this way. And, you know, we just haven't spoke about it. A lot of people don't communicate enough. But you guys do.

You guys do. And that's why I always have. And it really served as well. Totally. Because you made it through. Of course not. But you made it through. And that time was not an easy time.

Like you said, it wasn't two months. Real life. It was four or five fucking years. You went from like, you know, 100 to zero. And but you're back at it. And that's what was so great. Thank God. Yes, I know.

I love. I mean, yeah, it was amazing. And I loved that. I got a lot of feedback on that episode and that part of things. And I'm glad that we spoke again about it and got your side of things, which I've heard, like I said, it's not like you have to feel bad for both people in that scenario. You feel bad for the guy because like you said, you, you weren't getting what you needed and you had needs and it wasn't met, but you still loved your partner.

Like, what were you going to do this? It was like a real problem for you, but it was also for her. And I love that. So people should go back and listen to Sunny's episode to hear that if you're just relating to that and you haven't heard it yet. That's towards the end of her conversation, but it was such a great part of it. She also tells the story of her back story. You know, she was doing a lot of crazy things before she met you. She talks about this.

So people should go listen to her episode. It's 519. This is your episode. Thanks so much for calling it and sharing your side of things as well as your journey because I think you added to it. And it was great. What did we call you again? Thank you. I enjoyed my call with you as well. I'm sharing my side of that story that I hope a lot of people enjoyed. Yes, for sure. What is the name? What do we call you?

I'm Randy. Oh, Randy. Okay, sorry, Randy. Okay, Randy, thank you so much. Listen, if you want to send, you know, I got pictures of Sunny and lately some guys are sending in picks. You know, if you want to send in like a pick, an anonymous pick, not a naked pick or anything like that. And for guys, they don't have to be sexy. Like, you know, but if you want to send in some sort of of yourself to give people of it. You can. If you want to send it in, send it in through her. And thanks so much

for calling in, Randy. All right. Thank you, Kathy. You have a good one. You too. Bye. Bye-bye. Hey, everyone. Thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode. If you want to follow the show, follow me at Strict Anonymous on Instagram or Twitter. That's at Strict Anonymous.

If you are on YouTube, make sure to subscribe. I love YouTube as a platform for my show because people comment there and I try to reply back to every single person who post a comment. So even if you're not listening on YouTube and you want to talk about the show, go to my YouTube channel, subscribe, like, and share my videos. It's strictly anonymous podcast. If you want to sign up for my Patreon on my Patreon, you are not only supporting my show, but you will get these episodes early, ad free, and you get to see anonymous picks of my guests. Most of the girls send

in anonymous picks and some of the guys send an anonymous picks. So if you want to see a not PICS of my guest as well as support my show and get these episodes early and ad free sign up for my Patreon patreon patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast that's patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast the link is also in the description below thanks so much for listening okay I just want to tell you before you go that my book it's called strictly anonymous confession secret sex lies of total strangers is now available not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show.

I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang-bang girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third. person and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person and I wouldn't really

call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format, and finally, the audiobook is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me, okay? I give it to people who buy my book.

There's tons of people in there. everybody shares content with each other and that's what you get to do there you can post your own pictures and videos there's tons of channels we have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money it's a super fun place to be it's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it i will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my discord it's private like i said all you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase whether you did the audiobook the ebook or the paperback send it to me at Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's Strictly Anonymous Podcasts at gmail.com.

And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous Podcast.