Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 761 - BONUS EPISODE- Rancher is a 36 Year Old Widower w/Four Kids who Can't Get a Date

Episode Date: February 6, 2024

Rancher is a widow with four kids who can’t get a date and he wants one and he called in to talk all about it. How did he wind up a single dad in his thirties? What has he been doing to meet women so far? Why hasn’t it been working? Tune in to find out plus hear all the details including what has gone down in his dating life in the years since his wife died and why he feels like he’s never going to meet someone, how he had his first baby and how and why that baby mama left him with the baby early on, how he wound up meeting his future wife by accident and how and why that story makes him feel less optimistic about finding someone now, how his wife had serious medical issues during all her pregnancies and how it only got worse with each one, the exact medical condition she had, how dangerous it was for both her and her baby and how and why the doctors suggested that she terminate her last pregnancy, how he felt about terminating the baby compared to her and how and why he gave in to what she ultimately wanted, how sick she wound up being daily during her pregnancy and how and why she never changed her mind, how she wound up passing during childbirth and how he dealt with all of it and how long it took him to be able to move on and how therapy helped, the apps he’s been using to date women now and why he hasn’t been having any luck, the couple of women he has dated and how and why all of those dates never went anywhere, the rude message he got from one single mom on an app for single parents, exactly what she said and what she was implying and how it made him feel, how and why it’s important for him to forget about that message and get back on that app plus. Whole lot more. IMPORTANT: At the end he does give out all his stats including his info on where he lives (he’s a CATCH!!!) in case someone listening wants to be set up wit him. EMAIL ME [e-mail] **To see a pic of RANCHER plus see pics of my female guests + gain access to my PRIVATE Discord channel where people get super XX naughty + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it.

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It's patreon.com slash strictly anonymous. podcast. That's patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. Now listen, all of the links and the number to the confessions hotline is in the description. Today I have on Rancher. Now, anyone that clicked on this and is giving this a shot, I'm so happy that you are because this is so, such a great episode. I'm so glad that Rancher emailed me to be on the show because like, I think typically sometimes people see the titles and they're like, oh, it's just a show. about sex and it really is but I love talking to people on all kinds of problems this is like a generic problem he's a guy that's got some kids he's a widow he wants a relationship again not just to fuck girls

he could just fuck a girl but he wants a real relationship but he's got four kids and he owns a ranch that's why we call him rancher and he's finding it very hard to meet women and that's what we discussed but before we get into that whole thing we do talk about his history and you got to hear his story especially if you're a woman that lives in montana or minnesota okay and if you're like a single mom you need to listen up because this guy ranchers a good fucking dude and he is on the market by the end I'm like hey do you want to give a shout out to where you live send me a picture like maybe somebody listening is going to listen to this and want to date you and he said yes and that's why I'm telling you where he lives he did send me in a pick

so if you're interested in him after you hear this whole story because you are looking for a real relationship and you are a single woman in his area, you're going to want to email me. Email strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. Because, listen, like I said, this is a guy named Rancher. He had a baby with a woman when he was like 22. That story is pretty crazy how he wound up with the kid and he took care of that child at a 22-year-old guy. He's got his own ranch. He set that all up. He wound up meeting another woman who he married. The story of how he met that woman is so amazing. I love stories of people who wind up married, like their first meeting story. This is one of those stories. It's so serendipitous. You're going to love it. We talk about that, how he met her. And then how she actually passed. She died while giving birth to their son. They had a daughter. They were married for seven years. He talks about that. It's like a really tragic story. He talks about what he went through afterwards, how he was able to move on. It's pretty horrifying. He did go to therapy for a year. We discussed that.

And then we start to talk about his dating issues and why he can't meet a woman. Like I said, he's not looking to fuck. He's looking to date. He's got it all. When you listen to his whole backstory, you're going to be like, this is a good dude. Okay. He has hooked up with a couple girls. And I'm like, how dumb are these girls that they passed you up?

Because if they listen to my episode and they ask the right questions and they got this guy backstory, they would just get that this is like a catch and a half for a woman who's already met his kids and wants to move fast and have a relationship with some. somebody. He's got a built in life already. But for the right person, I think he's a good, he's the real deal. He's a good guy. He's monogamous. He's financially stable. He has a house in Minnesota as well as Montana. So either place works for him. Okay. So any girls listening to this? I'm playing Matchmaker here. Send me an email. But anybody listening to this, you're going to love his story. It's super interesting. In the beginning, it's more about his life. And that's just all interesting because what he went through and how he survived at all. He's a pretty amazing guy.

And then the second half is all about dating. And I give him some good tips, I think. And we talk about a lot of his crazy stories and stuff. And that's interesting as well. I love this episode. It's a bonus episode because it's not about SEX. But I love talking to people about anything. Really, that's just who I am.

So anyway, I'm going to get right to it and get right back on with Rancher. Hi, Rancher. Welcome to the strictly anonymous podcast. How are you today? I'm good. How are you? I'm good. Now, listen, am I talking to a.

real rancher. Is that why you're called rancher? Are you a rancher? Do you own a ranch? Actually, yes. Do you ranch? Is that like the verb? It's so funny. Okay, so listen, Rancher. I love that you emailed me. I think I put a call out on one episode saying like this year. I was looking for more regular problems that people could relate to. When I first started my show, I really just wanted a call in my show about anything. Dating, love, romance, sex. It just turned into sex because I posted on Craigslist by accident because it was free and I got all these crazy stories. But this year I'm going to do some more like what would we say PG rated and emails like yours I was excited to get because I think it's a topic that a lot of people

are going to be able to relate to. This is the short story and then I'm going to ask you a million questions. You're going to tell me your story. So Rancher, you're like 36. You got a lot of kids. You got four kids. Your wife tragically died giving birth to your child. And so you have been single. Your child's three years old. So I'm assuming that happened. and three years ago. You're looking to get back out and date again. You own a ranch. You got four kids. Okay. So you're busy dude. And you just can't seem to even get a date. And that's what you're calling in to talk about. Right. Yeah. Yep. So let's get let's get started. Now, I know that you said, oh, before you were married, like you could get chicks anytime, you would just go online and

meet people. So it wasn't like you never did online or anything because you're only 36. So when you were dating initially, there was like the whole online thing was going down and stuff, right? Because I feel like sometimes older people don't know how to navigate apps because they weren't around before they got married. But you know about apps and all that stuff, right? Yeah, absolutely. See, I'm not going to lie, I was kind of a huge player when I was younger. I like that.

I like that. This is the player that now can't get a date. It's even more interesting. Yeah, because I'm not, like, even since my wife's died, I've had like, like, random one night hookups. I can get late. That's not an issue. I want to find an actual relationship. Yeah, that's important to say because that was very, you were specific about that. Like, you're not now because you are looking for a real relationship. That's what's really hard. Now, like, what's the difference between the chicks that are coming home and just banging you out for one night as opposed to someone that you would date? Like, why do you never give those one night stands a chance? Are you like one of those guys that's like, oh, you fuck me on the first date? I'm not interested. A lot of guys are like that. It's just a thing.

You know, that's why they tell girls don't fuck a guy the first night. But it shouldn't matter. The fact for me, it's actually like more, any one-night stand I've had is never at my house. Like I said, I have four kids. Yeah. I'm not just going to bring some random person around. Yeah, of course.

And usually those one-night stands, it has nothing. I go in the intention of it not being a one-night stand. We talk and we actually get to know each other beforehand and stuff, but then they find out I have kids. And that's actually like a huge deal breaker. Oh, God, really? Are these young girls? What's your age range you're looking for?

That's the problem. It is a big problem, I'm going to say. I'm looking for everything from 26 to even 40. Okay, so you go up to 40. That's not bad. That's not that much older than you. That's okay. So you'll go up to 40.

So most of the women that you're seeing, they don't have kids already themselves? Because I feel like a woman with, I had kids. It would be beneficial that you also had kids. You know, and that's what I always thought, too. That's why this is so confusing for me, because I've talked to a few that have had kids, and it's like the fact that I have kids. I don't know if they think that there's going to be like baby mama drama.

Yeah, but don't they ask you where's the mom? I'm sorry, but a widow is like the best guy to date. He never got divorced. I mean, you would probably still be married. You're a good guy. What's the problem? Don't they wind up finding out your story? Well, yes.

See, and they do, but not all four of my kids were with my wife. Okay. How many baby mamas do you have? Two, just my wife and then a previous relationship. Okay. So, you know what? Why don't we go back and get like your story first? Should we do that so that I could get a little backstory so this doesn't, we go like kind of like in chronological order?

Let's start when you were like the big player in high school or wherever, whenever you started dating. Yeah. So I guess just all through high school, I dated everyone. I was on the football team, the track team. I did professional rodeo actually for a while. Oh, cool. So you were a popular guy wherever you live, right? In the rodeo place.

Yeah, I can imagine. It's like a guy in New York City that's in a band. Same shit. Right. Yeah, everyone wants to fuck him. Or at least I did. So you're like getting a lot of checks. You were in high school.

You were popular. Yeah. And I started dating a girl and we ended up having a child together. How old? How old was I? I was 22. Okay. So super young.

You're not even married. It was like a quote unquote accident. Yeah. Okay. Was she your girlfriend or just like a girl you were banging? Girlfriend for four months. So new girlfriend. New girlfriend, yes.

Okay, cool. Go on. I admit it was a complete accident. On me enough, the condom actually broke. So that is a really bad accident. That normally doesn't happen. I've used condoms all my life. Not one has broke.

Do you have a big dick? How did you break a condom? I truly have no idea. Yeah. A month later, she calls me and she's like, hey, I'm pregnant. But did you know the condom broke while you were having sex or like when you pulled out? You're like, oh, holy shit, it's broken? Yeah, when I pulled out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you did know. And then so she calls you up and tells you she's pregnant. Yeah. We kept talking, obviously, but just because we knew there was a possibility of that happening. Yeah, of course. But it was still just unexpected. Anyway, long, story short, we have a child.

We try to stay together as best we can for the child. I stay with her for the entire nine months that she's pregnant. And she gives birth. And I don't know what it was. My daughter is three months old, and she just has a breakdown. down. I get home at 8 o'clock my daughter's in the crib crying and there's a note saying, I'm done. I don't want this. I'm out. Oh, no way. She left the bait. She didn't just leave you. She left the baby. Yeah. She didn't want. Holy shit. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, listen, I had a baby at 46 and

I could understand at 22, however old she was, it's so hardcore having a child and it really changes your whole life. I think people don't understand that I could understand a woman. that gets so overwhelmed by it. I know, I know that women are going to be like, you can't understand a woman leaving the baby, but like on some level, she must have fucking flipped out. Like maybe she was mentally unstable.

That's a big responsibility to take on before you're ready. Yeah. And I hold no ill will towards her for this. Like my daughter is my daughter. My kids will always be my number one. Yeah, obviously. Uh-huh. So for three years,

basically, it was just random like one-night stands. And then it was just me and my daughter take on the work. I guess. Yeah, but can I ask you a question about the baby mama? Does she ever come back into the picture? So, yes. She has off and on.

She actually ended up getting like a really bad drug habit. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's what I mean. She's something is wrong with her. Any woman that leaves a child, like I said, I get being overwhelmed and feeling like it's too much. But there's a million things a stable person would do. But an unstable person that has issues is just going to fucking run.

So I knew she had some sort of problem. Yeah, she ended up developing a really bad drug habit, went in and out of treatment. She's been in and out of my daughter's life for since she was, since my daughter was born. Yeah. How old is that daughter now? She is now, I'm 37, 22, so she's 16. Yeah, okay. Yeah, it's, so that's with my oldest one.

And she does come in and out. And with my wife, she understood that. was whatever she comes in and out like at that point though my wife came in and she was mom like it's just she was mom so yeah okay so you so you were at the point where you know you have this baby now and you're like 22 how did you wind up meeting your wife at that time so this is actually I don't know kind of a funny story yeah so oddly enough I was at of all places Walmart at 3 a.m My daughter woke up puking, and we had no medicine of any kind in the house. So I load her into the truck, and we go to Walmart to go get medicine.

Uh-huh. And there in the aisle was my wife with her daughter. No way. Why was she there at 3 o'clock in morning? Was her daughter puking too? Nope, she was actually the one that was sick. Oh, wow. So she had to bring her kid.

And so here's just two single parents in this aisle and we started talking. And it just, within a month, we were living together. Oh, I love that story. I always love to hear, especially people who last a long time and have a healthy long marriage. I love to hear the story of how they met. Because sometimes it's just so random. And you're like, that's so meant to be. That's what I believe.

Your poor daughter had to puke and she had to get sick. So you guys would wind up in that Walmart at 3 a.m. to meet each other. How crazy. Yeah, yeah, it was, it's just one of those things that, you know, and meeting her in such a generic way like that. Like I picked up girls at bars. I picked up girls online. All of that stuff. But like meeting her in that way, it was just one of those things where I was like, okay, like this is the one. Yeah, you know, that shows that that kind of a, that kind of thing is a possibility. Sometimes you never know. Yeah, yep. For sure. So how, what, how old were you when you met your wife?

So I would have been, we were together for seven years when she passed away. So I would have been 28. Okay. So you're 28. Now, she knows you have a baby obviously because she meets you with one. What was her story with her baby? Like where was the baby daddy? Where was her baby daddy?

The baby daddy literally just dipped on her and had nothing to do with the kid ever. Wow. So you guys had a lot of common. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. It's one of those serendipitous stories that was... Yes.

100%. No, one would ever believe it, but... No, I love it. It's not even funny. It's beautiful. I love that your story. So you guys have so much in common. You immediately get together and, like, how long after you start dating do you get married?

Like, literally this girl, I was ready to propose after a week. Yeah. Like, I was just, I was just, I was done. Yeah, yeah. You just knew? Did you know that night at Walmart? I always say guys are the pickers. They know when they meet their girl.

Yeah, she was literally, for a surprise, she was everything I was looking for. She was absolutely drop dead gorgeous, extremely intelligent, and just literally like the girl that walks in a room in every single head turns. But on top of that, like that would have been great, right? But on top of that, she also is a single mom. You're a single dad. Like she had these like really weird things that were so in line with you. Like it's really random and perfect. Oh, I know. And that's, see, that's part of my issue because of how perfect it was and how random it was.

It's one of those things where it's almost, it's not that I'm expecting that to happen again. Right. But like it can happen once. You know what I mean? Can it, does it happen again or? Yeah, yeah. And it wasn't like you went looking for it and it was so perfect. I get it. it's almost like can lightning strike twice? Probably no, you're thinking. Exactly. Oh, my God, that could never happen.

It was so perfect. It can't. But I don't believe that. But let's keep going. So you marry her now. Do you guys start having babies, other babies, right away? Because I know she passes during childbirth. Did you just have one baby with her or more than one baby?

So we had two children together. Okay. So she had her biological daughter. I had my biological daughter. And then we had another daughter. daughter and then she passed away giving birth to my son. So, okay, but you had the daughter first because you're with her for seven years. You wind up being able to be with her for seven years, correct?

Yep. Okay, now with these other children, did she have any issues during childbirth? Yes. So our daughter, when she gave birth to our daughter, she was diagnosed with a fairly significant kidney failure issue. Only during pregnancy kind of thing. Yes, during pregnancy. Okay.

And they told us that they didn't know if she'd be able to even carry our daughter all the way to term. Okay. Miracle of God, it happened. And then we got pregnant with our son, just, again, complete drunken night, basically. Yeah. Got pregnant. And the doctors were like, this is going to be intense. This is not going to, we're not saying anything bad.

We're not going to predict that bad's going to happen. But this is dangerous. This is extremely, extremely dangerous. Did they tell you maybe you should terminate? What were those conversations like with the doctor? Because that's a scary position to be in. It's horrifying to be in the position. Either you kill your baby or you could be killed.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah, they actually, they suggested that we terminate the pregnancy for her safety. Yeah. And oddly, I'm not trying to sound horrible here, but for me, I was, okay with that because I would have done anything to have her in my life still. Yeah, of course. You know what I mean?

Yeah, of course. But for her, it wasn't even enough. You hadn't met the baby yet, so I can understand that kind of a thinking. At this point, you don't know who that baby is. It's just like a thought in your mind. She's a little tiny little embryo. This is your wife. She's the mother of your child.

This is the woman of your dreams. Of course, that would be your choice. I think anyone could understand that you would feel that way. Yeah. And for her, it wasn't even an option. Yeah, and any woman understands why she would feel that way. Any mom? Yeah, exactly. So I obviously acquiesce to her. Did you have fights about it? Like, what were those conversations like then between the two of you? Like, how scary is that for you? It's unbelievably scary. And it was literally me on my hands and he's begging her.

Oh, my God. I can't lose you. If this does go bad and I lose you, I will never forgive myself because I didn't make this happen. Oh, my God. And the entire time, she was just like, no, babe, we got this. I'll be okay. Oh, my God. Yeah. That's awful. We found out by this point that it was a boy, and she's like, this is the son you always wanted.

Oh, my God. This is, you can teach him how to rodeo. You can teach him how to throw a football. Yeah. Her mind was made up. What about her family? Like, how did they feel about it? She was never that close with her family.

Mm-hmm. her dad was there and he's just kind of one of those i don't even know how to describe it he basically was like do what's best for you but just know that if my daughter dies i never want anything to do with this child oh my god are you fucking kidding me no that's why we i haven't talked to her family since she passed away so even when that baby was born he didn't his mind. I mean, that's a piece of his daughter. Yeah. He stuck to that? Yeah. He literally wanted nothing to do

with my son. How sad for him. Like, what's fucking wrong with him that he can't get, you know, that he couldn't connect in a way that I feel like most people would. I can understand maybe thinking that way, but then if your daughter actually passes, this child is your daughter. This is Yeah. Oh, no, I fully understand. And I still don't understand it to this day. But that's just who he is. And he wants that.

That's how limited he is. Yeah, something's fucking wrong with him. In my mind, my son's better off not having him in his life if he's going to have something like that. Yeah, sad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Awful. So, wait, so during, so through the pregnancy, when does the kidney thing come up?

Like, was she sick throughout? Was it something that happened right at the end? Oh, really? So I don't know if you know what hyper-emesis is. No, I don't. Okay. So literally, she would have to go in daily. Like her arms looked like she was a fucking heroin addict

because she had to get so many IVs of fluids. Oh my God. You mean because this is like the minute she got pregnant, this thing that she had was an issue and was fucking her up. Yeah. Oh my God. She would pupe constantly. I mean, it was,

she would lose every ounce of fluid she had in her body. She would pupe constantly. She would constantly have just massive, of like she'd randomly pass out because of like basically her kidneys were failing. Now was it this bad the first time around with your daughter? No, it was bad, but not anything like this. Oh, God. So how scary for you because now it's like worse.

Yeah. And so she was a trooper. She was just puking every day but moving forward. Because like you have, I would assume like for the first three months, like she's immediately sick from this and it's obviously worse. She never winds up changing her mind. No. she was dead set, deadlocked.

This is what was going to happen. And how about you? Did you ever, were you like anti it the whole time worried that this was not going to end well? I mean, obviously I was worried the entire time. But as a father of three other kids, the second that I saw those ultrasound pictures, then I was like, listen. Yeah. I love you and I don't want to lose you. Yeah.

But you're right. Like, this is our son. Yeah. Okay. so she's sick the whole time. Yeah. She really had two good days the entire 40 weeks. Oh, my God.

Now, was she scared that it wasn't going to go well? Like, did she ever talk to you about that? That she was afraid? Yeah, she was obviously scared, but she was just one of those people that always would do whatever it took basically to ensure everyone else that she was fine. And she never showed it outwardly,

ever for me or our kids. Right. Because she didn't want them being even more scared. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She took it on herself. And so it's, yeah. But deep down, I know she was scared. I know she was terrified.

And being there, trying to help, trying to be supportive, but you're not the one actively living through that. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. It's not your choice at the end of the day. Yeah. Unfortunately.

I, there's only so much I can say. I can just be like, babe, I love you. Were the doctors even throughout her pregnancy because it was so bad still trying to get her to change her mind? Yeah. But then our family doctor who's been like literally all of my children's doctor. Yeah. She got to that point where she just knew that my wife was never going to acquiesce. Like she just, it wasn't going to happen.

Mm-hmm. She knew she was going to term. So she was, she didn't harp on it. anymore. She didn't heart because she's like, listen, she needs every ounce of support she can get. Yes. Any stress right now could not only kill your wife, but it could kill the baby because that's how bad she was. You know what I mean? So my doctor was just like, we got to do what we need to do here. Yeah, and how scary were all those doctor visits? Because, you know, you go and you never know what's going to happen when they put the ultrasound, you know, checking the baby to measure, you know, all those check-ins was

it was super scary because at this point because she's so sick it's not just her health it's the baby's health is the baby healthy yeah yeah so yeah and oddly enough like our son was born perfectly healthy wow which is a miracle in it of itself but well that was because of her she took it all on for her baby yeah that's that's all her so she go does she like go into labor like anyone else would at the right time or did she go earlier or something like how did that that bad day happen she went basically four weeks early okay and we took an we took an ambulance to the hospital it wasn't even like a let's go to the hospital babe like I called 911 and we took an ambulance why because she was so sick or because you were so scared yeah like I didn't want to take the chance yes it was just bad because she was

bad you mean yeah yep without difficult this pregnancy had already been right i wasn't going to take the chance of picking her up carrying her to the truck and driving the 35 miles to the hospital oh my god so the ambulance comes does she she gives birth to your child does she die like on the table or after i mean me asking these questions no that's fine yeah she they did everything they could so the child came, my son came out. Mm-hmm. And did they put her under to have the baby or would she be there? Yeah, they put it under and gave her a C-section.

Okay, okay. They said that the stress of natural birth would just, would have been way too much. Yeah, that's what I would assume. Okay, so she's under and they do a cesarian. Yep. And basically, her kidneys just shut down. While she was under. While she was under, they shut down.

and it's not like they can perform a random kidney transplant. They didn't have a donor. She wasn't anything like that. And she died four hours after my son was born. Oh my God. I could cry. I mean, this is like what a fucking awful time for you because here it is you have a new baby

and you lost your wife at the same time. It's like the best of time and the worst of time in one day. Yeah. Yeah, horrifying. Was her father there? No. No? Your family was there?

Yeah, my family was there, yep. Oh my God, how did you fucking deal? I didn't. I mean, I just shut down for, I mean, looking back, it is what it is, but I was just not coherent for two months. Yeah, I can't even imagine. Yeah, horrifying. Fucking horrifying.

And the baby was totally healthy. Yep, baby was. healthy. Did you ever have any dreams of her or anything? I believe in the afterlife. So I'm just wondering if you had any signs from her dreams or anything like that. Do you believe in that shit? Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. And we basically built this ranch together from nothing. I owned it before I met her. Yeah. But what it's turned into today was because of her. And so there is places all over here that were like our little places. And so anytime, I'm there, it's just, it's like I'm with her.

You're reminded of her and you feel her. Yeah. Wow. Wow. What an amazing woman to have been able to do that for that baby. You know, because she, she just, that's what she wanted to do. Yeah. She, and it's, she never wavered. Yeah. And now I have my son. And he literally is identical to her. Oh. Yeah. a boy but I look at him he has her eyes her nose her ears it's her yeah yeah yeah how long did it take you to get past that part of you that was like if something happens her i'll never be able to

forgive myself because you begged and pleaded and you couldn't change her mind did you eventually get to the place where you realized like you could have never changed her mind like how long did it take you to get to that place oh i'm not gonna i went to probably a year of therapy yeah of course. I realized after about six months after my son was about six months old that I just, I needed help. I needed more than whatever I was doing. So I went to therapy and it took about a year before I was finally able basically to forgive myself and to move on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can imagine. Okay, this is like a okay let's let's start talking about your dating again that's what you called in for but this is this is a part of your story i mean like does any girls that you go on dates with know these stories i don't know

i feel like a girl will fall in love with you like you're such a good guy even with the first story your 22 year old kid left with a baby you wind up taking care of that baby you you you put together a ranch you meet another woman with a child like you're a fucking great catch what's wrong with these girls at your meeting. See, and that's, like I said, so when I was younger, I could use, okay, Cupid, plenty

of fish, any of that, right? Yeah. And I'm not trying to sound cocky, but I could basically get a girl a day just to get laid. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, that's cool. I'm being honest. I never used it for actually a relationship.

Okay, you use it just to get laid? Is that what you used to? Get laid, yeah. Or like you go to a bar, and get laid. Yeah. I guess now that, obviously, now using it, I have all the criteria for relationship. And I mean, obviously I'm not that guy that's going to put, I'm looking for like a freaking 18 year old because I'm not. Yeah.

No, no, no. You want a real relationship with someone. Exactly. Yeah. But like now, I've been doing this now for about nine months. Okay. And I have not received a single response or message. Are you kidding? I should have had you text me beforehand your profile. Something must be fucked up there because I would assume there's got to be women around your age that are in your position where they have their kids already. They don't want more. Of course, a woman like that is not going to be looking just to get fucked either. She wants a real relationship. You know, so I would think that there's women out there that you would be perfect for and that are looking exactly for you, like a guy that already has kids. I'm a woman.

that single and have a kid and I would want another guy who has a kid that's what you look for just like you and your wife the first time around see and that's the thing like I've even tried this new thing called stir what's that which is like a dating app for single parents supposedly okay no that's cool get very specific yeah yeah and like I've even had so I have a best friend her name is Sam like we have been friends since we were fucking three years old okay like we grew up as neighbors And like she even looked over my profile And she was like listen If I was single like I would respond to this

I was gonna say why aren't you dating Sam She's not she's dating so much Yeah she's married to like my best friend Oh okay awesome okay cool All right so she thinks you she looked at it And thinks your profile's fine She's like I would respond Right okay

And so that's why I just I don't understand like it feels like I lost my mojo You know what I mean Because when I was younger This would have not been a problem But I also wasn't looking for the same things back then. Listen, the way you met your wife, you didn't meet her this way. You met girls that you fucked that way.

The way you met your wife is just like randomly bump into someone. Boom, there you go. That's the girl. And sometimes it happens that way. And that doesn't mean that while you're doing all this work on the apps and just like working it and being very intentional about what you want and what you're looking for that. While you're doing that, you won't wind up meeting somebody again in a kind of a weird way. Like that, you know, as long as you're open and your light is on and you're kind of

out and about, you don't have to be in the bars. You could wind up meeting somebody. It's not to say that that wouldn't happen again. Plenty of times that happens. Do you go to a gym? Oh, yeah. Okay. I do, but doing the work that I do for a living out here, it's basically going to the gym 12 hours a day. You're right. You're working out on your ranch by yourself. You're not in the gym with chicks is what I'm saying. You don't go to a gym with chicks. I mean, I do, but Like I said, the nearest town to me is 35 miles. Okay, so that's a problem. So it's location too, right?

There's not a big pond of the fish available, right? You're not fishing out of a big pond. And a lot of the fish I've already been with when I was younger. Let's talk about some of the girls that you have met. Like I was asking you before, you wind up with these girls and they're one night stands and it turns out they don't want a guy with kids. Like, how do you know that? what comes up with these girls that you go out with and you don't want it to be one night

stand but it winds up to be that way so on the random so i've had okay i guess i lied technically when i said i've had zero responses i had two okay but i just counted them as zero because they went nowhere basically yeah yeah and listen that's going to happen that more often than it doesn't happen i mean having kids having a full-time job where i'm i own this ranch like i own the horses i own the cows I own all of it. It's a 24-7-hour job. Yeah, yeah. And so I don't have time to just go have fun. Yeah. Especially not during certain times of the season. Like right now, it's probably the time that I'm the most available to actually go out and do things. Okay. So are you checking your apps and updating your picks and swiping left and right and getting on more apps like now while you do have that time?

Yes. Okay. So my thing. is so the things that I've heard from those two especially and then just one other random girl that I actually met at like the local drugstore. Yeah. Okay. And just started a conversation with it was like the fact that I have so many kids. Oh my. Is that what they say? It's not that you don't have.

It's not that you have kids that you have so many. How many do you have three? You have four? Yeah. And it's the fact that I have so many kids. And so once they hear four kids and then. that I it's kind of a

they're just like oh okay well these girls are so dumb okay like they're just not asking you the right questions who gives a fuck that you have four kids they don't realize that you're financially stable you've already kind of alluded to the fact that you're good looking you're a great father

which says something about your fucking character you're a good dude on top of it like you have all the things that a girl would want and they stop at four kids and a story Like they're not digging deep enough to understand that. So what? You have four kids and two baby mamas. If they hear the actual story, none of it is bad.

You're not like divorced twice, crazy baby mamas on the side, the fuck up that has so many kids. It's not that at all. But are these girls just not asking you questions? Yeah, it's like crazy that they're so quick to just throw you away. They're stupid actually. Because if these are single girls that are looking for guys, okay, there are garbage guys everywhere.

A good guy is. hard to find. These three girls, stupid, low IQ, not smart, are probably going to remain single for a long time. Or maybe they just want a douchebag. I don't know. Because you're a good guy and you're a good fucking catch. Even on paper. They're just not getting past the four kids. And first of all, like two of your kids are older, right? Like how old are kids? I have a 16 year old, an 11 year old, an 8 year old and then a three year old. Did any of, did the girls have kids to these three girls that you met? one of them online said she did i don't know about the one in the drugstore it never went that far

oh okay why because in the aisle you told her you had four kids like did you lead with that well no my kids were with me oh okay but i just started up a conversation with her and then all of a sudden four kids come around the corner and they go dad and you could just see her eyes fucking yeah but maybe she thought you were married did she know you were like so she might have just thought oh what a scumbat he's married and he's hitting on me. Well, I suppose, with her, I suppose, but the other two, we were, one of them I actually talked to for three weeks on the phone. Okay. And I was like, hey, like, I actually have time now. Let's go out. Like, I'll take you to dinner. Let's go get coffee. Let's see if there's actually a connection in person. Yeah. And by that point, she was like, it was weird because then she was just like,

well, I really enjoy talking to you and everything, but your life is just kind of so set already and I just, you have four kids and like I just feel like I'm never going to be like a priority. I can understand that. Was she a young girl that like had no set life yet? Was her life pretty much not started yet? What was her deal? I guess she was 29. Okay, but did she have kids or anything like that yet? herself? No, she didn't have kids, but she'd already graduated college and had a full-time job. Yeah, but I don't think a girl, listen, you never know, right? There might be a girl out there that doesn't want kids and is around your age, and so she'd be happy that you already have your kids and don't want more. I don't know how you feel about a woman coming in if she did want more babies, whether you'd have one.

But with this girl, I think a girl that Slate is clean and hasn't really started her life yet, never had kids or anything. I get why she would not want to hop into your already set life. That is a bit much, especially for a 29-year-old. You got like a 16-year-old that she could hang out with. I don't know. It's like very close in age. You know, it's a lot to take on for that girl. I think if you get someone, though, who's 36, 37, who's been a mom, that's a different kind of woman.

Once you've had a baby and you've taken care of it and if they got married, there's a maturity that's there that isn't going to be there yet. and a woman who hasn't had those things in their life yet. Yeah. Yeah. No, and I see, and that's why I actually started using this stir thing. Yeah, yeah, perfect. Yeah.

But as weird as this sounds, and I'm not trying to sound misogynistic or anything like that, but it's what I've experienced so far on it. Yeah. It's almost like the single moms don't like the fact that I'm a single dad that, like, stepped up and took care of his kids. kids. Why? I'm a single mom. I don't think that way. Why? Why do you assume? I feel like you have to be assuming that because did one of them ever come out and actually say that to you? Like, why do you

assume that? Or did someone say that to you? Yeah, someone said it to me. It wasn't even someone I message. Tell me what was that. What's that? Tell me what she said. She literally messaged me and she was just like, listen, I had to go through court hearings for years to get like the final custody of my kid. And here you are just for trying this person that doesn't just walk out and takes care of these kids. And basically she was like, I just think your profile is like full of shit. So she didn't believe you. Yeah, she just didn't. Yeah, listen, that's a, that's a stupid, that's another dumb, okay?

She's so dumb because your story is fucking true. Why don't you send her a link to this episode when it airs so she could see what she lost, okay? Because your story's true. And so, and honestly, she sounds like bitter. That's like really weird to reach out to somebody and sort of trash them. as if, I don't know, like, why are you looking at someone else's life and, I don't know, sort of judging it and you don't know that person and trashing them for it and acting like

you're such a victim and they're not, I don't know that. She sounds like a crazy person because who would do that? And that is not, but I'm sorry, you cannot take that single mom and say all single mom are like her. She's like weird. I don't know one mom that would say that. I don't even know what she was trying to say. What was she trying to say?

Like, you had it easy and I didn't. So fuck you. Is that what she was trying to say? I think so. And see, the thing is, it was just, it kind of put that thought in my head, even though I know that's not true. I have friends that are single moms, and they don't judge me like that. But having someone say that to you puts it in your head. Yeah, but can we just, can I just take it eraser in your brain and can I just erase that whole thing?

Can you just delete her from your phone? Like that doesn't exist. Please, we frame things sometimes in our brains and the way we frame them, it has an effect on us. Somehow you framed that that comment as something that it wasn't. You need to reframe it as fucking psycho, okay? That's what you should be framing that conversation. She's a fucking psycho. Something's wrong with her.

I bet you her story is her guy left her and ran for the hills, okay? Because she's cuckoo. Because for her to send you that message is so fucking rude and weird, especially you guys weren't even talking. It's unsolicited. It's unsolicited. rude comment. She's like a troll. Yeah. And see, the funny thing is, she sent it out of the blue. And after I got the message, obviously I looked at her profile.

And this was a chick that I would have never message. Of course. She's angry. She wouldn't even have crossed my radar. Yeah. She's a man hater. She's so mad. She's maybe she, listen, maybe if I was talking to her, when she told me she did that, I would know why, because I'd have her backstory, that she went through a really tough thing. And she's acting out. She's got her period. Who knows?

but that's a weird thing to send and but somehow some part of you attached to it and because I'm talking to you like we need to let go of that. That has no say in your story. That does not that is not representative of other single moms

and you know that you said to me just now none of my single mom's friends feel that way so I know that but yet somehow some part of you is like latching on to that and you need to let go of that because nothing is yeah sorry What I meant when I said that was I felt, I understand that single moms are not like that.

I felt like single moms on that app were like that. No, why? Just because she was? No, and just reading profiles on there. They're like, I would love someone to come help me pay the bills. You know what I mean? They just get right to it. Yeah.

They're all bitter. I just feel, I don't know. I guess I stopped using that app about six weeks after I did it. Yeah, but you shouldn't. Listen to me, the great thing about dating is you're not looking for six people to match up with, right? You're only looking for one. Okay? So you just need one person to be not bitter and psycho.

A lot of people, both men and women, so it's, I'm not going to say all women that get divorced like this. I've talked to men, I call them dickless divorcees. A lot of men after they come out of marriages are the same way. They're bitter. They hate women. Women, same thing. This is what happens in life. You get shafted and then it creates the baggage.

That's a baggage. Yeah, of course, a lot of those women are going to have baggage, but there's plenty of them that aren't. And like I said, you only need one. So you should be on that fucking app. Who cares? Even if it's the majority, you're only looking for one. And the minority exists too.

There's probably some great single moms on there that are in your same position that would ask the right questions, realize what you went through, and get that you're a good fucking guy in a great catch, and you're perfect for them. You should not have taken your same position. off that app. You shouldn't just because of one crazy bitch. And even if a lot of them have those crazy profiles, let me just tell you as a woman who's been on dating apps and everyone will tell you, there's a lot of crazy people everywhere on every app. You can't see. And a lot of phony. There's a lot of nonsense everywhere. But you can't let that, that you should have never let that take you off that app.

So just put yourself back on there. All right. Seriously. Really do it. Make sure your friend, Rachel looks at your profile. You got hot picks of yourself. How do you pitch yourself? I say I'm looking for a relationship, but I'm also not wanting to jump into something immediately. Like, I want to get to know you and talk. Just take out. I don't want to jump into anything. First of all, look at how fast you jumped into your wife. I feel like if you met the right person, you would jump in.

You don't have time. You're like a full time working down with four kids. Take out. I won't jump in. You don't have time to slowly date. Are you crazy? You're going to, you want to jump in quickly if you meet the right person. Take that shit out.

You know what that says to somebody like. oh, I'm like wishy-washy. Don't put it on I don't want to jump in because I don't think that that's the truth. At a certain point, you get to life. And this is why people break up quickly, more quickly when they're older and stuff. Because you don't have time for riffraff and nonsense. You know, you get right to it. You're a hardworking man.

You have a lot on your plate. Like you said, you barely have time to date. If you met somebody that checked off all your boxes, you're like move in tomorrow. What the fuck do I need to wait for? So I think you need to take that out because I think sometimes for a woman that's really ready and no she wants to jump in. That's like a red flag. So don't say that.

Just don't say that. Okay. Take that out. The whole reason I had that in there. Yeah. It wasn't even, I understand what you're saying. Yeah. The whole reason I put that in it was strictly because it's so weird for me to bring someone new around my kids.

Right. You know what I mean? Like, so when I said take it slow, I meant. Because of the children. But you could say, but of course. But, you know, that's something you could discuss in person. Don't put it on your thing, you know. I mean, unless you speak.

you spell it out. But you don't need to say all that stuff. Any single parent understands that and a decent good woman is going to roll that same way. You know what I mean? Any parent that's dating isn't just going to bring their new partner into their house the minute they meet them. So I think that that's sort of a given. And like I said, if it's the right person, they're going to, they're going to understand that you don't need to say that. And you could talk about that when you're on the date, but you've got to be in the game. And see, that's, my other issue is obviously I love the life I have. Yeah, that's great. But the remoteness of my life does not work well as far as meeting people. I have to set my like parameters for like search

radius right for 250 miles. That's okay. That's even more of a reason why you need to get fucking on it and get back on that app because you need to meet somebody because without that somebody, you're like the loan on your ranch. I know you've got kids and stuff, but you want a companion. You're young. You're 36. Absolutely. Absolutely. You want you want. You want. You want. You want. You want. You want. You want. want someone around. You need that companionship. You got nothing for miles. You got horse shit all around cleaning up all day. You got kids. Like, I think that that's more of a reason to just go back on that other app and just keep at it and know that the right person will be out there. Like, I believe that. Sometimes it takes a little longer to get what you want. But I think if you just keep doing the work and no matter how many times you go on a bad date or how many weirdo messages you get, you don't give up. you will eventually get what you want. Your wife is on the other side. I believe this.

I believe in souls. Ask her for help. She's going to send you your new girl. You're going to have a new girl. I promise you're a good guy. It's what you want. I think when you're really ready, shit happens.

And so as long as you don't have any blocks in you, it sounds like this is exactly what you want. There's no reason why that person isn't going to show up. It might take six months, six more months. Who knows? But you are going to meet somebody. And you have to know that. Don't be negative about it.

What I always say, and it's like my big joke, but it's true. If you ever think, oh, there isn't somebody for anyone, just put on an episode of intervention, and you'll see, like, a guy drooling in a puddle and his wife running out after him, okay? If that guy could get a partner, you can, right? There is somebody for everybody, okay? Like, you're, and you're somebody's out there.

You're not like, yeah, you got four kids, but you got a strong business. You're financially stable. These are things that women look for, sorry. They're not, like, money-hungry bitches. It's just like that that's the stuff that, is attractive to women and is good to put on the table. You're a great dad. Like I said, that shows your character. And character is really important. So for a smart girl that's really

looking for a guy, you are like a price. And like I said, I'm assuming you're good looking. So you are like a price. The fact that somebody hasn't picked you yet is like sad for them. Because some girl's going to be really lucky. A girl that has her own life, has her own kids, that, you know, and is going to come into your ranch, move in with you, and she's going to help you and have a full life, like, on a platter, handed to her and her life being taken care of and she could meld hers with yours. That's a great situation for the right person. And there's plenty of women in that situation that it's going to work for. You just haven't met the right one. But a smart girl is going to get that and is going to hop on it.

And like I said, anyone else that's passed you by is dumb. No, I really think. I'm a woman. I know there's a garbage man. all over. I told you, like, it's hard to find good guys. I'm sure, are you a faithful guy? Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. If I'm in a relationship, I would never cheat on the person I'm with. I'm not saying when I was younger, obviously countless one-night stands and stuff like that. But with my wife, absolutely not. Like, I would have turned down fucking anyone for my wife.

Yeah. So, I mean, on paper and in real life, like you have it all. And not only, like I said, are you got a business and you're good looking and you're, and you're secure and stable, you know, monogamous. You're a nice guy, and that goes a long way. And the biggest thing is, is you want a relationship. There's plenty of guys that that's the last thing that they want. That's a big problem for girls. They meet a guy, he just wants to fuck them, and then they ghost them, and they're dealing with all that kind of nonsense,

especially single women. Even the women who are divorced or whatever with kids are probably finding that either guys hating them, up pretending they're looking for a relationship and then they just want to fuck them. You're a real guy that really wants a relationship. There's plenty of girls out there that would be into you. You just have to be, I think, on more apps and putting yourself out there. Do you want to give, listen, I have a big audience.

Do you want to give a shout out? You never know I might get a person listening. No, I'm really serious. I want to help you. Where do you live? Can you say? Do you mind? You're not talking anything bad here.

No, yeah. Yeah. Montana. You're in Montana. Okay. And so any girl that's around Montana or wants to live in Montana, again, you just heard this guy's story. He's a catch. Okay.

You want to send a picture? Montana or Minnesota, honestly. I have a lake cabin. Oh, my God. You have two houses. Okay, girls, listen up. Oh, my God, your catch. Two houses.

You're good looking. Can you send a picture? You want to send me a picture? Okay, you're going to send me a picture. Anyone wants to see Rancher, email me. I'm going to put your picture up on my Patreon, but I'm not going to make people join there to see it. If some bitch emails me that's like I'm like in love with Rancher and I want to meet him, I'm going to be, you know, sending her your pick, hooking you up. Like, I want to help you out.

You're a good guy. Anyone listen to Montana or where did you say Minnesota? Minnesota, yeah. Wow, Montana or Minnesota, this is a guy, okay? He's got four kids. You heard his whole story. Rewind. Listen to it again.

He's a catch. Email me ASAP because I feel like I'm going to get emails for you. I'm telling you. I'm going to post this as a bonus episode. I love this kind of thing. Look, I could talk to you as much as I could talk to someone having gangbangs. I just find human being stuff super interesting. I could have had you on the phone for two more hours asking you more questions.

I love this story. I totally know you're going to meet someone great. You've been through so much. I really appreciate you calling in and being so open about everything you went through. I give you so much credit. It's like amazing the stuff that you've done. So like I said, at 10,000 times the right girl's out there. and I hope she emails you.

And listen, Rancher, thank you so much for emailing me to be on my show, considering what it's about. Like, I don't know. Did you hear me give a shout out that I want more tame stuff on my show? I'm actually, I've started listening to your podcast actually like a couple of months ago here. It just popped up on my Spotify and I was like, huh, whatever. Yeah. And now I'm on like episode like 150.

Oh my God. Don't go back. Listen to the newest ones. In the beginning, I used to interrupt people. They were so awful. I can't even. And I had some bitch write a bad review on iTunes recently. I was like, oh, I made a mistake and went back and listened from the beginning.

And she used to suck and blah. It's like, fuck you. Like instead of saying the opposite, like, wow, like she's come so far. And she worked her ass off for 10 years doing her show. She didn't know what she was doing in the beginning. And now she does such a good job. Instead of saying that, she like pointed out like cup half empty. I'm like, who is good at their job when they first start?

You know, this was like something new to me in the beginning. and I've just grown and become so much better at what I do and editing and sound and everything. Well, even by like episode 150, it's already better. But I actually really enjoyed listening from the beginning because I thought it was absolutely fucking hilarious. All right. Awesome. But I'm so glad you gave it a shot and just emailed me with this pretty tame kind of regular story because I love stuff like this. Like honestly, I really do.

And I'm so glad that you wrote in and that I had you on. And this is going to go up as a bonus episode. So send me your pick sooner than later. get back on that app, okay? And I'm going to put this up, like I said sooner or later, so I could try and get you a date too. Perfect. All right.

Awesome. You're the best. Thanks so much for calling in. Sounds good. Thank you, Kathy. Bye. Okay. I just want to tell you before you go that my book,

it's called Strictly anonymous confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audio book. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story.

There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person, and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short. Chapters, easy read. You could read one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audiobook is available. coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or

pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint. Okay, there's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other. And that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook or the paperback.

Send it to me at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. and I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous podcast. Hey, everyone, thanks so much for tuning in to this week's episode. If you want to follow the show, follow me at Strict Anonymous on Instagram or Twitter. That's at Strict Anonymous. If you are on YouTube, make sure to subscribe.

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