Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 790 - Alex Went from Camming, to Hooking Up with Couples, to Swinging to Having an Open Marriage and More

Episode Date: March 21, 2024

Alex went from camming, to hooking up with couples, to swinging, to having an open marriage and more and he called in to talk all about it. Tune in to hear all the details including how he felt uncomfortable picking up women naturally and how and why that led to him joining adult dating sites, how he always thought he was too small and how he found out he wasn’t, how and why he started camming and who would watch him, the first couple he met up with for a threesome and what went down, the other couple he hooked up with where the guy sat and gave him tips, the demographics of the couples that he typically hooked up with, the hotel takeover swinger party he went to and why he left early, the second time he went and what went down that time, how and why joining the lifestyle helped his self esteem, how he met his wife and how he got her into the lifestyle, how and why it was harder to find couples to hook up with as as a couple, the time he played solo with a female and how and why that ended badly, why they stopped exploring the lifestyle plus a whole lot more. **To see anonymous pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confesss while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Conversations with online strangers. We place ads online. The Craigslist is definitely like the gift that keeps on giving. Real people respond. You go to Singapore or Thailand. You can't not do it. The temptation is just too much. With real problems.

Do your friend know that you're banging her or no? No, he has no idea. And anything goes. The motto of the show, let your freak flag fly. Probably the only good advice I'll ever give you is to re-harm. your whips and chain. Here is your host, Kathy. Hey, welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast with Kathy.

If you want to follow the Strictly Anonymous podcast on Instagram or Twitter, follow the show at Strict Anonymous. If you want to be on the show, don't DM me on Facebook. Don't even DM me on Instagram. What you should do the quickest way to be able to be on the show is to send me an email. You could either go to my website, Strickly Anonymous Podcast.com, and click on Beyond the show or send me an email, strictly anonymous podcast.com, strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com.

Give me a little information about what you want to talk about. I want to do some episodes that aren't so X rated. So if you're just looking for regular advice for a regular problem, I'm down to tape a couple episodes like that and see how that goes. I'm not going to stop producing my sex content. Don't worry. You're getting more episodes this year than ever. But if I add a bonus episode every now and then, I'd like that.

like to talk about regular stuff. So, you know, you're dying to find a boyfriend, but you can, or I don't know, shit like that. Doesn't have to be so salacious. But I love a salacious story. Okay, I still put out three or four episodes of those weeks. So if you have a naughty, interesting life that you want to talk about while remaining anonymous, and I tell you everyone remains anonymous on my show, I change everyone's voices. You could be on the show. Like I said, go to my website or email me. All of that information is in the description. I also have a confessions hotline that you could call 247, 347, 4203579. You can leave your confession there.

Those are becoming episodes. I change all the voices over there as well. They are all aired on my Patreon. Now, my Patreon is a really great place to sign up for for just $5 a month. If you join my Patreon, you hear all the anonymous confessions.com in to my show. Plus, you get all of my episodes early in ad-free. Plus, you see all of the anonymous books of all of my Patreon. female guests and most of them are effing hot. Okay, so you could see those all over there.

Plus, the best thing about my Patreon right now is you get access to my private Discord. There are over 2,000 people on there now. They have Titty Tuesdays going on there. I don't get involved with my Discord. It's more of a community for my listeners to get involved with each other. And they do. You could post whatever you want on there. It's free. You got to go through my Patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. Like I said, it's only $5 a month. So today I have on Alex. Alex's short story was like, hey, I was an immigrant who was a hermit and didn't have any kind of social game at all. And then I became a swinger and a cam guy.

And that's exactly the story. He's on the spectrum. He talks about that. He really didn't know how to pick up chicks and he wanted to know. So really his way of figuring it out was going on adult websites, not regular dating sites, like adult websites. And that's where he learned how to have some game. He started camming on there. He started getting hit up by women and couples.

And he started banging couples. And he talks about all of that experience. And he had some girls that he hungs up with. Talks about a couple of those experiences. And then eventually he started swinging and he goes to some hotel takeovers. And talks about all that kind of good stuff. And then eventually he was like, oh, and then I took things up a notch. And I was wondering where the fuck he was going with that.

He was like, I got married. And then eventually he gets married. He tells his girl what he's into. She's down with it. They wind up doing all kinds of things. He kind of glosses over that a little bit towards the end. That's when I started to think, is this guy full of shit? I don't know.

I don't think so. But we do go over the fact that him and his wife played. They haven't done it for a while. They're looking to get back into it. But mostly we talk about his journey into the lifestyle and all of his experiences when he was solo. So he did send me picks of him and his wife or just his wife. It's over on my Patreon. He will be on my Discord if you want to talk to him.

The story's super interesting. I had one other guy that was like him, kind of like a virgin type of guy. This guy wasn't a virgin when he started in the cam world, but, you know, the story's interesting. So I'm going to be right back on with Alex. Hi, Alex. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast.

How are you today? I'm doing fun. How about yourself? I'm doing good, Alex. So I'm going to give the short, very short story and then you're going to give me a long story because it's really basically like one sentence you were an immigrant at some point I thought you were going to call in with an accent but you don't have an accent so you called yourself a hermit and you went from that to being like a swinger

and being a cam guy and all that kind of crazy stuff I don't know what you're doing now but you know how did you get from coming to this country and being like a hermit and then becoming a swinger so really it happened because so when I came to the United States I came to an area where people like me people from from my home country were really not common and I was at that age where kids in certain ages let's just be honest they're kind of assholes it can be kind of asshole and your your initial reaction is just to retreat I don't want to have anything to do with these people There's probably some sort of like a trick or they're going to do something that I'm going to really hate for their amusement or I'm going to get bullied.

So the best way to kind of deal with that is to give yourself some space. And that's exactly what I did. I just gave myself a lot of space. There was also the issue that I didn't speak English as well. I knew just enough to kind of get around and express some basic needs that I had. but it took me probably about, you know, eight months until I actually became fully fluent. Okay, but how old were you at this time? I think I was about 13. Yeah, about 13.

Oh, my God. How do you go from 13 to swinging? I hope it's nothing illegal. Oh, no, no, no, no. It took a really, no, it took a really long time because when I say I was a hermit, it was for a really long time. It's from like 13. Like, I finished high school without so much as going on a date because I was just like, I'm not. This is. this is too much. This is overwhelming. So I had, I also had, I was on the, I'm on the spectrum, so there was also that. So it's just, it was difficult all around. I just did not feel comfortable for the longest time. And I was really awkward for the longest time. And I ended up, I want to say, I was around 20, 21. So I started meeting some people in college. I started going to some of the college parties.

I also kind of during when I was in college I also took up like I really got serious about like lifting and like going like I bought a home gym and I was very religious about hitting that every day just because I just because I liked it. So I started getting into shape. I started getting invited to parties. I started meeting some people. But then I never really knew how to like escalate things. If I was actually interested in somebody, I could carry on a conversation. and when I was growing up, a lot of my friends were girls. So I was totally fine. Like, I was totally fun talking to girls. But at the same time, if I'm actually interested in someone more than a friend, I don't know how to do that. So I found myself very much on the periphery.

I want to take it further, but I don't know how. I'm always too shy to progress. So I thought, okay, what can I do where I can practice? practice, but at the same time, if things get problematic, if things get inconvenient, if things get embarrassing, I can just log off and quit and try something else and kind of take my knocks and go. And that's when I discovered adult dating sites. Okay, so that's where you started. Because I'm assuming at this point, you're in college, but you're a virgin, right?

So, no, I'm actually not, because I did have a couple of things. of experiences where I've actually like I've had sex but it was I was very much weight that's that's what it is that doesn't really feel great for either of us it feels like really awkward I'm not really sure what I'm doing and it's very overwhelming because again spectrum it's not I'm not like this is not like the best thing ever and then I also discovered a couple fun things about myself one of which is that when I get inches, I have delayed ejaculation. So it takes me forever. And the girls don't like that. Oh my God. You're pounding them for an hour. Yeah. No girl wants that. Yeah. No. And I'm like noticing like, I'm raw and numb. This does not feel good. So I don't want to do this anymore. So I'm not a virgin,

but at the same time, I feel sort of like I am. Because you've never really had that experience of loving sex yet. You don't get it still at that point. Like, why is everyone so to it because you weren't into it just yet, really. Exactly. So, like, I know, I know there's got to be something really good because a lot of people saying praises to it. So obviously, I'm doing something wrong. Yeah.

So you go on adult sites because you want to have some action. Which is the site that you go on? Or do you go on a bunch of them? So I went on a bunch of them. I went on a really small one. And I don't remember what it's called. It was like arrow, something, something. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't. It's long defund. Like, it's long gone. But I actually did not necessarily want to have hook up immediately. I wanted to spend some time chatting and seeing how other people around me escalate. How do other people do this? So I'm there kind of like as a fly on the wall, looking at chats, participating in chats,

trying to see how things go. And I probably spent, I want to say, six months to a year, just kind of trying to learn. I did meet one person, though, and that was really interesting. So this person, she was a dominatrix who was kind of looking for an assistant to kind of like help her out. And we met a couple times. It was just just kind of get to know each other. But this was the first time that I've actually like ever like received nudes or sent nudes. So that was a really interesting experience.

I'm learning. I'm picking things up. I'm trying to figure this out. And then after a while I figured, okay, this site isn't working. So I'm going to go to the big boys. I'm going to go to places like adult friend finder. I'm going to go to places like Fed Life. I'm going to where the action actually is.

And now I feel like I'm actually more or less ready, except I have a problem. My problem is that like a lot of guys, I have a certain insecurity. You're too small. You think you're too small. I mean, are you waiting for me to ask the question? You're going. You're doing good. Just keep going.

Yeah. Yeah, so I'm thinking, you know, I'm too small because the only thing that I know about the sizing is from porn. Yeah. And, of course, they exaggerate. There's a lot of angles. There's certain selection advice. So I'm thinking, I don't know, like, I don't have any reference, any real frame of reference. I don't know what I'm doing, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

And I did keep in touch with some people from that first site. And one of them convinced me to get a. camp so we can camp with each other and we did that and that was fun but i'm too shy to basically go too far still and i feel like okay this is really holding you back i feel like i need a little bit of confidence and so i joined one of the groups that was for exhibitionists specifically for exhibitionist guys and women who really like to watch them and so i'm like nervous I get myself ready for the for kind of like my first cam show. I'm sweating bullets.

My heart's going 600 beats a minute. I am just I'm like, okay, all right. I think I'm having a heart attack, but I have to do this because if I don't do this, if I don't get confidence, if I don't feel like safe in my own body, if I don't feel like I can, If I don't feel like I can show myself, then this, nothing's ever going to happen for me. So I get a viewer, or rather request from a viewer, and we go on cam with each other, and I tease. I kind of delay the moment, so I have her a little bit worked up. she's encouraging me and then I finally strip off and the feedback that she gives me is amazing.

Like she's very encouraging. She likes what she sees. The best orgasm ever. So that was your first time. A quick question. I got to ask you a quick question just to make sure before we move forward. My one question to you is should I assume that when you're talking about people, hooking up with people, camming with people.

This is always women? Yes. Okay, all right. I just wanted to make sure. So we're dealing with women. So that was your first camming experience, just with one girl? Yes.

Okay. Go on. And then I, from there on in, I started to escalate to the point where I'd have up to a dozen people watching at the same time. And almost always women. Sometimes there were guys, and I wouldn't necessarily kick them off.

But at the same time, I wouldn't interact with them either. You weren't into that at all. No, it just does nothing for me. No, no disrespect. Just does nothing for me. That's okay. But, yeah, but at that point, I'm feeling pretty confident, and I'm starting to get messages from people and basically asking to hook up. So the first people I hooked up with were actually a couple, and they just wanted to have a regular.

Yeah, they just wanted to have a regular threesome. And I'm like, okay, you know what? I'm ready. Yeah, I'm ready. I'm going to try this. Yes, I'm nervous. but I'm going to try this. And it was, so it was actually really great because they were really nice and they understood that,

hey, you know, he's a young guy. He needs a little bit of, he needs a few pointers. He needs a little bit of handholding. So they were actually like super nice to me. They basically kind of walk me through everything. They made me feel really comfortable. I met them at their house. And they kind of have, they have porn playing on TV.

but nothing like too crazy. And they, we had a, we had a nice drink. We had a nice chat. I kind of went to freshen up, make sure I'm like nice and clean and have my breathing and under control. And I come out and they're like moving the couch out of the way to give us more room. And she is taking her clothes off. And I'm like, okay, this is good.

This is, this is cool. I basically don't have to do anything. They're like ready to go. And I'm part of me is like, okay. So how are we going to start this? And she walks up to me. At this point, she's completely naked. She walks up to me.

And she just very gently starts stroking me and kissing me. And she's not in a rush. So I'm like, okay, this is really nice. I can slow down a little bit. This is not crazy. And we just spent a really long time on foreplay, just kissing each other, feeling each other. he was kind of standing by and he's he's he's kissing her while i'm like moving down her stomach

and playing with her breasts and starting to finger her and kissing her in her thighs and he's also he's like trying to give us also space so i can go down on her and then i was i was actually able for so like for the first time i'm like really actually going down on a woman And I was, believe it or not, I was actually able to make her come. And I'm like, okay, I'm on top of the world. This is great. Like I made her, like, she's shivering. She's moaning.

I'm, okay, this is, this is great. This is fantastic. She gives me absolutely wonderful world. And then she's like, okay, I'm ready. Get a condom on. She kind of pins me down to the couch. And she gets on top of me and starts to, writing me. And I think

like with all the foreplay, with how gentle she was, with how we're not hurrying anywhere, we're just enjoying everything. I'm like, okay, I get it. I'm enjoying this. This is fantastic. And I still couldn't come.

Couldn't to save my life. Is her husband just there watching? Is that the extent of his participation in that scenario? So he was, he took turns just watching, but he would also like if she's if she's going down on me he was he was doing doggy style behind she was he was doing her doggy so we were kind of like switching off so basically basically classic spit

roast yeah okay okay so yeah and and again it wasn't it wasn't too much I thought it was really cool and after that I'm like okay I need to I need to start answering these messages and meeting up with people. And I think I ended up going, I ended up meeting somebody else like a month later. Standard date. We met at a restaurant. We went over to her house. She puts on a movie and then she sits in my lap and starts making help with me. Okay. Wonderful. And she's very passionate. And it's kind of a similar setup again. She's got a husband or is she solo? She's divorced. Okay, so you're just like hooking up with her solo.

So this is just like a booty call. Yeah, basically. And she was extremely, she was extremely passionate. It was kind of a very similar setup. We're just taking a, we're just taking a while to kiss and get comfortable and explore. And again, it was, this was another one of this experience where I was like, okay, wow, this is, this is so great. And then she really surprised me. And she's like, okay, we need to hook up next week.

Okay, cool. So now I have a regular thing going. And I didn't even know that was going to be possible for me. And in the same time, I'm also doing the cam shows. And I'm getting more and more messages from people who, like, want to hook up because they saw the show. Sometimes it's couples. A lot of times it's single women. And I am starting to respond to the messages.

I meet a whole bunch of people, but I don't necessarily have sex with all of them because sometimes the chemistry just doesn't necessarily work. And I end up just kind of, you know, in this really interesting space where I am just really enjoying being seen and having that positive feedback and interacting with all these people. and I, the biggest thing that I did that I think really helped me overall is I always wanted to know them as people. Like I was never just like, hey, let's just hook up and go for it. I always wanted to spend a little bit of time at least talking to them or getting to know them. So couples were, I actually ended up meeting a lot of couples where the husbands just really wanted to watch their wives and not necessarily participate that much. There was one couple in particular where the husband really, all he did is you just say, sat and watched and gave me tips.

I mean, that's not bad. He knows his girl. Yeah, no, it's fantastic. Imagine, I'm just like, just having sex with his wife is pretty much every single position that either of us can think of. And he's like, oh, she really likes it if you touch her here, or she really likes this position, or if you go just a little bit faster, like this, she'll come. And I'm just like following his instructions to the letter.

And she's enjoying herself. I'm enjoying myself. She was so wet. Like, I was soaked. And I just, I'm like, this is amazing. This kind of lifestyle is absolutely amazing. I see why people enjoy sex. I see why people really like this.

And at the same time, I'm getting better and better at communicating with people. I feel more and more confident. I feel more and more at ease. And it's just, it's doing wonders for my mental. health at that point because that whole oh I'm a lonely insecure hermit that's all gone and you don't even probably think you have a small dick anymore I mean do you feel better about your size too at this point so yeah I mean it turns out that my size was this is going to sound like I'm bragging but it turns out that my size was that my size was more than adequate I was pretty much everyone I've been with

summed it up is it looks challenging but not intimidating so I'm like okay that's perfect Challenging doesn't mean small, that's for sure. No, no, that's the thing. I thought, no, I thought I was really small. Turns out, nope, absolutely not. Oh, my God, that's so funny. But wait, why did you think you were small? I mean, what's your size?

So I'm seven inches and pretty thick. Oh, my God. Yeah, and I didn't really have a good frame of reference because, see, in porn, they use a bunch of tricks to make a seven-inch dick look like a nine-inch dick. So that's always the comparison point. So it turns out that I'm basically hung like the average porn star. Again, sorry for bragging, but it's true. And so I was like, yeah, I feel really confident. I get a lot of compliments.

All the lifting is paying off. I look nice and proportionate. I look pretty, I look strong. I look healthy. People want to talk to me. People want to fuck me. I'm like, yeah, this is amazing. This is fantastic.

So you're like banging all these couples now. you know, you're young at that point, right? How old are these couples that you're hooking up with? So I am in my early 20s and they're in their early 30s. Oh, so they're young. Yeah, yeah, everybody's, yeah, everybody's pretty young. I think the oldest, and I would say that it's like 50-50. It's 50% couples, 50% single women. And I would say they're old. in that kind of range of, I want to say, 28 to 35, 36. Really? How long ago is this? How old are you now? So I'm in my late 30s now. Okay. So this is 10 years ago. 15 years ago. 15 years ago. 15 years ago, there was like a ton of 30-something-year-old couples looking at have their girl fucked by someone else. I don't know. I just typically think that these couples are a little bit older.

No, it's, no, it's like, you're right. It was like, you're right. It was like, the heyday of that. It was becoming like super acceptable for people to do that and getting out in the open. So there's a lot of couples that are just like, listen, if we can find someone who's like respectful and looks good, we're going for it. And I just happened to be there at the right place at the right time and kind of reap the benefits of that. I think probably the oldest person I've ever hooked up with was 42 at that time. But yeah, that was that was usually my, that was kind of usually my, my, my cover. off after that they just people just didn't feel comfortable because I'm still in my early 20s they're just like I got kids going into high school you could be helping them with their college admission essays and here I am trying to fuck you I just don't feel super comfortable about that and you know what I got I got it I totally understand I never pressed on if they felt uncomfortable and what ended up and then the other thing that ended up happening is that there was a whole community of of people around my city that kind of just, I don't want to say that they just kind of passed each other around among

themselves, but they kind of did. How did you find those people, or did they find you on this site? So they found me on these sites, and there were a lot of just these chat rooms that they created, and I was part of those chat rooms, and that was there long enough, and I haven't met with enough of them just platonically or just out, or I would go to these, they would organize these meet and greets, where they would play like trivia nights and bars, and I'd sure. show up and we'd have a great time. And then I basically started getting referrals.

And there's actually a guy. And I really hope that I have to say this. I really hope he doesn't figure out who he is. But there's a guy who I think that every woman that he tried to like, that he tried to date in that group, he would end up singing my praises to them so much because he, I guess he liked hanging out with me so much that they would be like, hmm, hey, Alex, where do you live? Just out of curiosity, also, what are you doing on Friday?

And I have Tuesday free after work. And I'm just like, okay, come on over. So he passed people on to you. I'm sure he doesn't mind. I'm sure he was doing that to be cool with you if he liked you. Maybe. I mean, people in that scenario typically aren't possessive with who they're banging. He might have got off on the fact that you were fucking women that he fucked.

Who knows? Yeah, I think. I think that that may have been the, that may have definitely been the case. But yeah, I mean, my calendar was pretty busy. And then there was one particular event where at that point, I've just hung out with them basically platonically, just in bars. What, all these couples in this town? How many couples was it? Like it was a bunch of people in this one town is what you're saying?

Or in this one area? It was a bunch of people. No, it was a pretty big city. So it was a bunch of people. Okay. So that's a good advantage of. of doing this in the big city. There's always, there's, there's, there's always somebody new. Uh-huh.

And, and there was one particular person who the guy was just talking about kind of referred me to, who said, hey, we should hang out this one weekend. Okay. Yeah, sure. Let's hang out. And she says, come to this hotel. Okay. Interesting. But you know what? I'm up for an adventure. I go to the hotel. And turns out it's like a swing or hotel takeover. Oh, okay, and this is the first time. Yeah, I had no idea. And within five minutes that I'm there, women are, like, flashing their breasts.

This girl who invited me and her friend are in the pool. They have their tops off, and they're like, hey, we have 36 double Fs. How many can you hold in both your hands? And the people are, like, taking pictures. And there's people, like, sizing me up. And I'm, like, back to, like, uh-oh, this is like, a lot. I don't know if I can handle this. So I ended up kind of sneaking out of there. She was a little disappointed, but I was like, no, this is, I'm sorry, this is too much. I'm not quite

ready for that. Too social of an event for you, maybe? Yeah, it was just, yeah, it was just too much. I thought, so I, at that point, I'm like, it's, it's one thing where you have that atmosphere where you end up hooking up with people after getting to know them, but it's a different thing when you're just like come in and people are just like, woohoo, get naked and let's, let's party. Yeah. And I was not quite up for that yet. So I had to work my way up to that. Oh, okay.

Yeah, I just had to, yeah, I just had to work my way up to that. And then the next time a friend of mine invited me and she was like, listen, I know you're not, you weren't super comfortable at the last one, I'll help you through this one. So this friend in particular, I, so I met her because she was watching my camp. And she was super shy about talking to me. Like she wanted to talk to me, but she was really, but she was like really shy and really coy. We start talking. And for the longest time, she was like, I really want to hook up with you, but I kind of can't.

And then finally, finally, she was like, no, you know what? We need to meet up. we met up. We had just the wonderful normal discussion. And so we started hooking up after that. And so one of the big thing that she told me is she's like, oh, I'm actually like the queen of blowjobs. And I'm amazing at this. And I really want you to experience that because, you know, I've been watching you for all this time.

And I just, this is like a thing that I really want to do. Okay. Because I've had a lot of claims at this point. But no, no, she was not exaggerating. I think I was like about five seconds into it. I was like, oh, hold on, hold on. I was not expecting that. I think I'm about to blow.

She was that good. So obviously, I'm like, I can't let that pass up. So we started hooking up and she's like, I'm going to help you through your second one. So we go to the second one. I had a much better time. I think people were a little bit less rowdy as well. So it was a lot easier. I would just mostly come in with people in rooms.

I dealt with much smaller groups of people. So I think I ended up having a foursome on that one. So that was cool. You're not sure. I can't, you know, I honestly can't remember. It was a busy night. Oh, my God. Well, you didn't take long to be to get comfortable with that kind of scenario.

So that was your second time going and that time you had a foursome. Yes. And, and again, like the reason why I kind of wanted to talk about. is because there's a lot of stories of people that I've encountered who talk about, oh, the lifestyle is so challenging and it can do so much harm to people, et cetera, et cetera. And I think that it can. But if you take some of the necessary precautions, if you get to know people before you just, before you do anything, it can do wonders, especially if you, like me, had a really low self-esteem or felt like really lonely and out of place. Here's a community of people where you can basically find everything.

affection, friendship, really hot sex. Just, you know, this is kind of, I guess it's kind of like an advertisement for giving this a try. So, like, if you've ever thought about it, try it out. Well, I think, listen, I think it's an interesting point of you. I had one other guy that I would compare you with if I had to put you in a category. You'd be with this guy. I forget what his name was. He was an Orthodox Jewish kid who was a virgin, actually, and had no access to the real world.

He lived in a very strict religious. household. He wound up swinging. And so he could lose his virginity. That was like the only way he could do it. It wasn't going to happen in his world because everyone was super strict and there was a lot of rules and regulation. So he would sneak out and go to swingers club. And that's where he lost his virginity when having all these threesomes and stuff. So I think it's a little bit easier to navigate the lifestyle when you're a solo person. You're not opening up a relationship. You don't have to worry about all the stuff that a couple has to deal with. You're the single guy. I mean, you're kind of love. that you have been so successful in the lifestyle because the one thing that would like the one thing

I have heard is that a lot of times the single guy is not really that welcomed in the community sometimes you know that could happen that could be the worst thing going for you yeah because they can be really aggressive and I just wasn't I just try to be I just try to be very nice and kind and respectful and I immediately found a lot of open arms so like you said you know, being a solo guy was fairly easy. So that's when I decided I'm going to take this challenge up a notch. Oh, my God. Where do you go from there?

Well, I ended up falling in love with somebody who I met. Oh, okay. So this is funny enough, this is not a person who I met through the side. This is not a person who I met for state because there were a couple of people who really wanted to date afterwards. And I actually just dated them in committed relationships. Those unfortunately didn't last. But I ended up meeting somebody just like in a coffee shop on a whim. But the nice part is now I have that confidence and I have that experience to where I know exactly how to escalate.

I'm really comfortable with it. So literally one date and we moved in. Wow. Yeah. And then we got and we ended up getting married. Wow. Why not? So yeah.

You're still together? Are you guys still together? Oh, yeah. Yeah. We're still together. I love that. And yeah, and we spent probably kind of a year where I was just like, okay, I'm only focused on building this relationship, nobody else. Like, you guys can talk to me, but I'm not hooking up with anybody.

I'm not talking to any. I'm not really actively talking to anybody. I'm just going to spend my time building this relationship. So probably like a year, year and a half then, I started introducing, I started introducing her to my friends from the Swinger community. And I'm like, listen, this is. I just want to explain, this is where I'm kind of coming from. It was a bit of an adjustment for her because she's thinking, oh, I met this cute foreign guy in the coffee shop,

and this is very much like a typical thing. And it's, oh, oh, no, this is what he was up to before he met me. Holy crap. But she made the adjustment pretty quickly. And I'm like, are you kind of open to exploring this? And she's like, yeah, if we find the right people, I'm game. Okay. Awesome.

I hit the jackpot. and we started trying to find other couples. And that was really a challenge because that's when we, that's when we figured out that trying to make four people's dynamics work are, is very complicated. Yeah. And what would end up, so what would end up happening a lot of times is that I find women who are just

really like, okay, yeah, you guys are super cute. I am so down. and her guy would usually do or say something really ridiculous and completely turn her off. I can give you one example. We're with this couple. And they're asking us what we like to do. So one of the things that we did as a couple is both of us did MMA. And she's like, oh, that's really cool and continues to flirt and make small talk.

and he's like, yeah, and he turns to, at that time, we were married already. So he turns to my wife and goes, oh, well, I'd love to see my head between your thighs or something like that. And she's like, oh, my God, I can't. Like, shoot, she acted really cool about it and she laughed it off. But after that, she's, oh, my God, I can't, I can't. Why are they so, why are they all so bad at flirting? I was like, I was bad too. She's like, yeah, but how did they get married?

They were supposed to get better. So, but yeah, so we explored a lot, but sometimes we'd end up kind of going off on our own, just kind of gave each other's whole passes. Really? Solo play, you banging girls and her banging guys? Yeah, it turns out that one of the things that I discovered about her early on and she was pretty open about. So there was an incident where she took me to a party.

And there were a lot of people who got. really drunk and really rowdy. Like this was, this was like really crazy party. And one of her friends tried to make out with me semi-successfully. Because I was trying to, I was trying to avoid it just because her normal friends are around. So I'm like,

I can't look like I'm too into this. And those friends are horrified. They're like, oh, my God, this is, we just witnessed the end of a couple. And they look at, we were not married then, but they look at my wife and they're like oh my god oh my god and she starts laughing she's like oh my god this is the funniest thing i've ever seen and then and then we come home she's like yeah that's kind of hot so that's so she was like it's kind of like we didn't really give each other

too many details but we would always run the people by each other to get each other's opinion of it and then there was one particular case where there was a girl with who i had a lot of really good chemistry and my life is like okay yeah you totally hook up with her like she's she's cool she's very cool hook up with her let me know how it goes uh i know she's i know she probably got a guy somewhere so we can hook up with her after that okay awesome so i go meet up with her we have a great time we have we have lunch we go to a bar have some drinks and she's like okay my place is right down the road shall we yep we absolutely shall And as we are having our fun, she decides that it will be, actually, you know what?

Maybe she didn't decide. Maybe it was me. I can't remember the exact details. But the bottom line is both of us decide maybe it would be fun to take a little video of her just going down on me. So we took maybe like a minute clip of us going for it. And she did it with gusto. Like you, you like,

it looked just like it came from a professional porn clip. She got really into it. She had me almost all the way down. I am, I'm moaning in the background because it, I mean, it feels really good. She knows exactly what she's doing.

I'm stroking her hair. And it's really hot clip. And the next day, I get a message from people going, hey, cool video. What do you mean, cool video? because I didn't post anything.

And my friend, the one who kind of shepherded me through my second swimner party, is like, oh, my God, you didn't, you didn't post a video, did you? I'm like, no, what videos everybody talking about? So I log on. And it turns out that on her profile, on that site, she posted the video. Really? Yes. And it also turns out that she was apparently going to meet some guys. guy at the time and she kind of like bounced him aside and he was wondering what was going on.

So it was a bit of a messy situation. And the reaction of this community that I thought was like, okay, they're really, you know, they're a bunch of really nice people who are really open about stuff was really kind of weird. They started talking about, they started trying to tabulate my body count and try and take a tally of everyone I've been with. And it was just like, wow, this is this is a really nasty. scene and my wife gets home from work and she's like hey what's going on and i tell her what happened and just like she didn't ask you to like i didn't think you were going to post any i'm like i didn't

she just decided that she was going to do that and that got her really mad so so everybody's mad at everybody there's way too much drama and we decide okay we're just going to cool everything down for a while this is just not this is just not a good scene so we kind of close things up and we've kind of just focused on, focused on ourselves until recently. And now we're kind of just thinking about, oh, let's try, let's, let's go ahead and try and kind of open things up again. We moved from, we moved to a different city. There's a different community here. Maybe we should explore, maybe we should explore this. But for a while, that was, that was one of those things that we were just like, oh, that's, that's not great. Because just, just don't post other stuff.

other people's videos without their consent, really. Of course. I don't know. That's pretty messed up. Don't you think? Oh, yeah. It was, yeah, there were a couple of other things that had happened. One of the things that, that it was really nice because generally, 99% of the time, the community was great, the people were great. But there were a couple of incidents where women are like, some women decided they really didn't like condoms and they wanted to try and get me off guard where I didn't have a condom on

or I was switching condoms or something like that. That was that was not fun. So there are some there are some cases where I had to be like okay no this is it this is done this is over I'm not this this is not safe I'm not doing this. It's one thing if we're exclusive or it's one thing if we got tested and we know that we're both clean but just with random people this is a terrible terrible idea and I'm not. Let me ask you this because it sounds like this is like, you know, everything that you guys have been involved in. Like, where are you and your wife at now?

Do you still play with people? Yeah, we haven't really, but we started looking again. We've been having a lot of discussions about, hey, let's open things up again. We really want to try as a couple because right now I just don't really have a lot of interest in playing by myself and neither does she. So we're just really kind of been focused on. Let's just do these things as a couple. Let's get back into this as a couple.

and have lots of fun together. Let's try and find people who are maybe a little bit more experienced. Now we're older. So, of course, our acceptable age is older. So we're hoping, like, hey, we're going to be able to find more experienced people who've kind of been through the same thing that we have, who are just, like, very chill and can just be laid back. So we're kind of on the hunt for some friends with benefits.

hopefully we've come close to a couple of people. But I don't understand. How long ago did you guys stop playing with people? I want to say about five years. Okay. Did you play for a long time? You went through your and your wife's hookups pretty fast. I don't know how long that was.

Did you have a lot of action? Was it minimal? So it was fairly minimal because we didn't really, we didn't really do that too often. I would say maybe like couple times, like maybe a year. year. And it was really kind of like when the mood struck us, we weren't really committed. And the reason why we kind of, the other thing is we were really busy with just really

establishing our careers. We're both very ambitious in our work. And for a long time, it was just really just work, work, work, career, career, career, just really kind of powering through on that. And now that we're in a good place, we can relax, we can have some fun. And We're like, okay, let's maybe let's let's get back into this because we've had some, we've had fun here and there. Let's kind of get, let's kind of get back into it. Let's let's try, let's try something new. Will you go to clubs or you just look for people online? How did you mean people before? So it was mostly, it was mostly online, but there's all these great Reddit communities nowadays. There's all these fat life communities nowadays. So there's really good, good wasted.

to meet a whole bunch of people very quickly and get an idea for the community. So that's kind of like our next step. Let's look for some interesting communities around here. Let's go to a couple of events. Let's meet some people. Let's take a gauge. Let's see who we click with and just let things develop naturally. I think the big difference now is that I'm older.

I have more patience. And I'm also, I also feel like I'm in a pretty good position. I'm in a really good stable relationship. So I am not in a hurry to get to the action. I want things to take some time. I want to get to know people. I'm more particular about things that I look for. She's also grown more particular in things that she looks for.

So we're kind of just, yeah, let's just take it slow. Let's let things develop naturally. Let's not rush it. Let's not push it. Let's just have fun with it. Okay. well, that's kind of interesting story. I mean, you went from being a hermit solo guy to being kind of a swinger and hooking up a couple.

And then you fell in love. And somehow you got your wife down. I mean, there was no issues getting her on board with your lifestyle. It doesn't sound like it. So I would say, there was some explanations that I needed to do because I think that she was a little bit intimidated at first because this is not what she expected. But I think just meeting people and seeing that, oh, yeah. no, they're just normal people. You can go at your own speed.

She started to relax. And then obviously seeing that I can go out and have some fun here and there and I come back and I'm like, oh, yeah, this was fun. But I really just love you and I'm with you and nothing's going to change that was very reassuring for her. So she really understands like I can separate the fun from serious. feelings and she was it so it took a little bit but it wasn't very difficult I think just because she wanted to she's an adventurous person she wants to try different things she wants to see different things so it's pretty easy to get her on board with an adventure as long as you can kind of address her concerns and show her like yes this is safe this is not going to impact us negatively in

any way and then obviously there's some there's some basic rules and if something how happens like somebody posts a video without your consent or something. Everything will stop and will reassess and that's exactly what happened. Right. Does she know you're calling into the show or is this on the DLD? Oh yeah. No, she knows. Okay. Well, if she knows, if you want to send me an anonymous picks from my Patreon, you can. I don't do face shots. Everything's anonymous. I don't take picks of anyone that doesn't know. They're on the show. Also, because you're calling into my show, I will give you private access to my Discord channel where you could talk to my listeners. On Discord, you could upload your own picks and photos and people could do the same. People are kind of like hooking up

over there. It's a lot of X-rated stuff on my Discord. I don't get involved there. Everyone on their pays to get on there, but my callers get to get in for free. So I will send you a link to go onto Discord after your episode air so you could talk to my community over there. And in the meantime, If you have any kind of sexy picks you want to send, nothing X-rated to me for my Patreon. Anonymous picks, that's cool. Send them my way sooner than later, so I know that I have them.

Absolutely. Okay, Alex. Thanks so much for calling in and sharing your story. Thank you for having me. Yeah, thanks so much. It'll be up soon. Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly anonymous Confession,

Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available, not only in paperback and e-book, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story.

There's a cuck story. There's a gang-bang girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third place. person and they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person and I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read one or two and then skip around.

You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format. paperback format, and finally, the audiobook is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other, and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly

anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook or the paperback. Send it to me at strictly anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. That's Strictly Anonymous Podcasts at Gmail.com. And I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous podcast.

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