Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 950 - FETISH FRIDAY: Jen Caught her Husband Crossdressing and He Still Won't Talk About it with Her

Episode Date: October 25, 2024

MAJOR UPDATE ON HER STORY, CHECK OUT EPISODE #966 Jen caught her husband crossdressing and he doesn’t want to talk about it and so she called in to talk about it. Tune in to hear all the details including how their sex life was before she found out, how she found a bag of dildos first and what he said when she confronted him, how she then found a bag of her clothing that had been missing and how he reacted when she confronted him, how she eventually caught him dressed up in the house and then found a whole slew of bdsm equipment and clothing and how he reacted then, how she remained open to everything as she discovered it and even copped to being turned on by it and how and why he still refused to open up about it, the letter he eventually sent her and what it said, how and why she’s still looking for ways to help him be open and honest with her about his fetish, advice on how she can help to accept his fetish. how she’s now domming him in the bedroom and how he feels about it, how and why she remains totally open to his fetish and down for his to dress in front of her but at the same time feels frustrated that he’s still not fully being open with her, how she’s looking for a crossdresser who has advice for her plus a whole lot more. **To see anonymous a pics of my guests + get TONS of exclusive CROSSDRESSER episodes and content + hear all the anonymous confessions, join my Patreon Crossdresser tier it's only $10 a month for crossdressers (you get also get Hoser episodes too!) and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at [e-mail] or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confess while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you want to be on the show, it's called Strictly Anonymous because they change everyone's voices and everyone's names. You could call me from a phony number. I don't care to know exactly who you are. I just want to hear your true story. So if you got an interesting, true, naughty story that you want to talk about while remaining, remaining anonymous, send me an email. Strictly Anonymous Podcast.com or just go to my website, Strictly Anonymous Podcast.com, and click on Be on the Show. If you have a confession, you want to get off your back, call my Confessions Hotline. 347, 4203579. That's 347, 4203579.

My Confessions Hotline can be called 24-7. You have four minutes to leave a message. If you need longer, just call back. I will edit the calls together. I change all the voices over there as well. They all get aired on my Patreon and some of them wind up on a Confessions episode. Now, my Patreon is a really great place, especially for cross-dresses.

If you're listening to this episode, it's a cross-dressing episode for Fetish Friday. I have a whole cross-dressing tier. I have a hoser tier and I have a regular tier. Now, if you join the cross-dressing tier, you get everything that every tier has because it's the top tier because some cross-dressers are hosers. Some aren't. But if you join the cross-dressing tier, you get an extra exclusive episode that has to do with cross-dressing on there as well as the exclusive episode that the hosers get. So if you're into pantyhose, you get that as well. Plus, you get early and ad-free episodes across the board, anonymous picks of all of my guests.

Plus, you get access to my private discord. There's plenty of fetish channels in there, including a cross-dester one. On my cross-testing tier, we have lots of contests with really great prizes. It's super fun. It's $10 a month, but you get all of that. And it's not like you just get one episode a month. You get all the previous episodes that I've been posting once a month for the past like three years. So there's tons of extra exclusive cross-dressing episodes over there.

And then you get a new one every month forward. If you want to sign up for my Patreon, it's patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. That's patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. And like I said, you get access to my Discord. Where people get super naughty, you go on my Discord and talk to other cross-dressers and post picks and stuff and they do the same. Now listen, if you're interested in signing up for SDC, which is like the most popular online dating website for adults, it's SDC.com, the worldwide. You can now sign up for SDC. If you use my code

37712, you're going to get a free trial. So if you want to check it out, sdc.com, use my code 37712 or just go to the description and click on the link. The thing about SEC that everybody loves is it's not just a place to hook up, right? Like you could post picks, it's an online date adult website, but it also has all the munches and the meet and greets and the parties and all that kind of good stuff in your area as well as in every area. So if you're traveling and you want to meet other cross-dusters like you, maybe you could look for them over at SDC. You get a free trial, click on the link or use my code 37712. Okay. This is a fucking great one. Today I have on Jen. Now let me just tell you, Jen is a woman who has been married to a guy for a really long time.

They're both in their 30s. And over time, gradually, she started to find things in her house. And she talks about all those things. First, it was like dildos. And then it was like, you know, she found out her guy was like on an app, like a fetish app. And then she found clothing. And then she found like a whole box of like BDSM toys and tripods and more clothing. And, you know, it turns out that her guy is a cross-dresser.

He did confess to that. but he's still very closed off on dressing in front of her. She is like so amazing. Anybody who's a cross-dresser that's listening to this, who has a wife that won't engage with them or doesn't know, you're going to be salivating and you're going to want to date, Jen. Okay, because Jen is so cool and amazing. Even after everything that her,

she's still down to try everything. She wants him to wear clothes to the bedroom. She's actually excited for it. She's into it. She's down for it. But he will not open up. He's not at the place where he is ready to accept who he is. And that's why she called in.

She's looking for advice. How can she get her guy to fully open up to her and be able to be who he really is, like, straight up in front of her? She really feels like this is a really great moment for their marriage where it could change things for the better because before she found everything, they weren't having good sex. And it's obvious why, because he had all the secret stuff that he was into, and she's just hoping to get to the other side. I give her some advice. But what I really say at the end is like, let's put a call out to a crush sister.

Like her husband. You got to listen to this whole thing. Someone who's like her husband, but is on the other side, eventually got to the point where they were able to deal with their shame surrounding their fetish and fully accept who they were and be out and proud with it with their partner or with other people or whatever. you know, I want to do another call with Jen where we talk with that kind of a cross-dresser who could come on and really explain to Jen like what is going on with her guy and give her great tips on how to get him to the place where he could open up and be truthful about who he is. And so she could engage with him and they could bring it into their marriage and they could be better for it.

Because right now he's still lying to her. He's still not being honest about it. It's starting to really affect her. and she's looking for help. So when you listen to this, if you are that cross-stress, and you want to come on the next call I have with her and be the person to give her advice, please email me, Strictly Anonymous Podcast.gitml.com.

Send me that email, strictly anonymouspodcast.com. And you might be the one that we have on. But anyway, you're going to love her story. You're going to love her. So I'm going to get right to be right back on with Jen. Hi, Jen. Welcome to the Strictly Anonymous podcast. How are you today?

Hi, good, Kathy. How are you? Good, Jen. Listen, you have a really interesting. interesting thing going down. And it's probably not uncommon. There's probably other women out there like you, right? I had one other woman in my 10 years of podcasting who called me, but she called me on like a paid call to talk about the fact that she found out a guy she was dating who she was very much into was into cross-dressing. What you're dealing with is your husband, who did find out he's

into cross-dressing. He's also into anal play. He's into trans women. Like there's a lot of things. you've found out about your husband. You're really looking for advice and we will put a call out. You write for advice for you, but we're first going to get your whole story. Like I said, I think that this is like a really interesting topic to talk about. And I feel like our conversation, putting our conversation or your story out there will help probably a lot of other women that are out there because I'm sure this happens to a lot of women, but a lot of women don't talk about it, right? That's what I'm saying. I hope so because right now I feel pretty alone. So I would love to hear about other callers out there or, you know, other women that are going through this as well.

Yeah, exactly. So like how, give us a backstory on your guy's marriage and then talk about, like, how you found everything out and go in like chronological order. Oh, boy. Okay, I'll try to, I'll try to do it. I might have some points where I have to go back and forth, but. So we've been together for a really long time for like probably almost 20 years. So we have been married for about 10 years. So we were together for quite a while before we got married. And maybe it was about four years ago when I, well, here, let me start. When we were in the beginning of a relationship, we were, you know, we were teenagers at the time.

So we were having sex all the time and everything was really great. We had a great sex life. And then gradually as the years progressed, I wanted to have sex. but he was you know we would have sex but it didn't it wasn't exciting anymore it was just kind of it didn't feel as like spontaneous and sexy as it used to be and he knows like I'm always very open to everything so I kept thinking that there was something wrong with me that like is there something wrong with me that he doesn't want to have sex with me or so you know over the years we're having sex less and then I I was thinking that he must be having like a really low sex drive and I even

talk to him about that. I brought that up. And he said, no, I, you know, I'm just stressed out. So, you know, we just continued through our relationship. About four years ago, I was going through a drawer. I wasn't even like snooping around or looking for anything because I didn't even know what I was looking for. So I pull up in a drawer and I find like multiple dildos. And like, clearly they're not my dildos. So I, I pull up in a drawer, I find these dildos and I'm like, what is going on? So at this point, And this is, let me, I have to make it very clear. This was before I ever listened to your podcast. So the first thought in my mind was, oh, my God, he's gay.

Yeah, of course. And obviously, since listening to your podcast, which I've now been a listener for probably a year or so, I know that that's not necessarily the case there. Of course. If it is a Venn diagram, those circles are not on top of each other, okay? Right. But I mean, I was just really shocked because, I mean, these were dildos like, like they're dicks. I mean, they weren't just like, you know, tubular-looking things. They were dicks.

So I freak out. At this point, I think we were trying to have a baby at the time. So I'm like, now I'm in like crisis mode. Like, oh, my God, he's not even into me. He's into guys and all this is going down. So I brought it up and I know I did not bring it up in the right way. And I was just like, what's going on? I found everything upstairs.

Like, what's happening? And then he flipped it around and was like, oh, I bought this all for you. You know, it's stupid. We were going to try things. And like we've had anal sex before. And we, you know, I've always, you know, we've played with toys before. Nothing like crazy, but just, you know, little thing. And I was like, well, I don't think that's true.

And he's like, well, it's fine. It was stupid. I'll just throw it out. And I was like, all right, like, whatever. Like I'm, but I'm open to trying it. And he's like, no, it's fine. It's fine. So it was weird and then I just kind of forgot about it for a while,

but it was always like in the back of my head just thinking about, oh, something's up there, but I didn't see any other signs. Then fast forward. Because he was into anal. Is that what it was? Like he had like fucked me. Yeah. But I didn't know that he was into it himself.

But what was suspicious to me was that one of the dildos was like one of the ones that you can like like slap to the side of a shower. Yeah. Oh my God. So I was like, well, that's weird. Why would he get that for me? If he's saying it's for me and like he wants to use it on me, why is he getting it? You know, obviously, I guess it could be used when we're together, but it just seemed weird. So fast forward a couple of months.

Again, looking through Jordan, not looking for anything, but I find this bag of my clothes. and I'm like, you know, what is he doing with my clothes? And these are things, like they were, so he's a hoser, I think. So he had my hose. He had, you know, different dresses, like bathing suit coverups, different things that, and it seemed to be the more lacy or mesh type of materials that he would, that was, like, he had kept, like in this bag. So I confronted him about it.

And I think this time I did it in a lot better way. And I was just like, you know, what's with like my clothes? And he's like, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm like, I found the clothes. I found my clothes in your, in your drawer. And it's stuff that I had been looking for. And in fact, I think it was before we were going on vacation. And I asked him if he knew where one of my bathing suit coverups were.

And he's like, I don't know. Why would I know? I'm like, I don't know. Like, did you see where it was? And he's like, I just forgot about it. And I was just like, all right, maybe he likes to dress up. That's fine. I don't care.

You know, I'd much rather him be dressing up on the side than like going off and like screwing other people. But I mean, at that point, he still was like, means nothing. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. He was denying 100%. And then he was like, oh, I don't know. That's stupid. I don't know why that's there.

And I was like, all right. So fast forward again. Again, like it's like every few months something would pop up. So then another thing happened where I, I went for a walk with someone and I came back and sometimes I call him when I'm on my way home, but I didn't call him this time. And I guess he thought I was going to be out for longer. And I walk in the house and I see like these like mesh thigh highs just like on the floor when I walk in.

And I was like, what is this? And then he like, you like walk into our kitchen and he pops up from behind the island. Yeah. And he's like, and he's naked. Oh my God. And I was like, what? are you doing? And he just, like, freaked out. And he was, like, so ashamed, so embarrassed that he was just like, oh, don't look at me. I got upstairs. And, like, really, like, out of control and, like,

screaming and freaking out. And so I was just like, I've never, I don't know why he's doing this. So I went upstairs. And then he didn't want to talk about it. Nothing, nothing after that. He, like, he's pretty, he's, he's, he's like a vault. He's, he, you don't get anything out of him. This Memorial Day, shop one of avocado's biggest mattress sales of the year and fall in love with sleep again. At avocado, better sleep starts with better materials. Our certified organic mattresses are crafted without compromise, using high-quality organic materials that bring comfort and support into perfect balance. No polyurethane foams, no shortcuts. Just a cleaner, more natural sleep experience that your body will appreciate night after night.

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That's avocado mattress.com. So I tried talking to him a few times. He didn't want to talk about it. So finally, I might be skipping things in between, but the big event that happened was in, it was February of this year. And he had fallen asleep or gone upstairs or something. And his iPad was sitting on the coffee table and a like a notification showed up. And I just happened to glance over. And it was for a, an app that I've never seen before. So then I Google it and I find it's like a like a dating, like a kink dating app. Which one was that? Do you remember? Kinkoo. Oh, okay.

I don't know. I had never heard of it. I'm also like I don't download dating apps. So I, I Google it. I'm like, all right, this is weird. I go downstairs in the basement because he had been spending a lot of time in the basement. And I never go. down in the basement because there's nothing for me there but like his workout equipment is there and

there's other like he does projects he like does things in the house so i like never go down there but i always was suspicious that like something was going on down there oh no so i go downstairs and in the unfinished part of the basement i was like i almost like dropped to the floor there was just like it has to be thousands and thousands of dollars worth of just sex stuff Like, I mean, like tons of dildos, like the inflatable sex couch where you can attach the dildo to it. Like, you know, BDSM stuff. I mean, like, what's it called? A camera, like a setup, a camera setup.

I mean, like a tripod. Like a tripod. Tripod, yes. Condoms. So that's what originally freaked me out was I saw condoms. And I'm thinking like, why does he have condoms? Like, okay, if he's doing things on his own, that's one thing. That's one thing, but why does he need condoms?

You know, I later realized that it's to put on the toys. And then I found a huge garbage bag or maybe even two garbage bags full of my clothes. Like, and my clothes and also like all this lingerie, like really sexy, slutty stuff. And I was just like, so at that point, I just like, I lost it. And I went upstairs and here I am like kind of pacing back and forth. Like I don't even know what to do. He's still sleeping. So finally he came down and of course he's like half asleep and I like just, you know, I just unravel.

And I was like, what's going on with this dating app? And he's like, what are you talking about? And I explained to him what I saw and he's like, I don't even know what you're talking about. Because he said he didn't consider that. He later told me he didn't consider that. a dating app. It was, I don't know what it is, but it's some kink thing. I'm sure some of your followers know what it is. So I am in tears because I'm like, I've been trying to talk to you about things and you're, you won't open up to me. You know I'm open to trying anything. I'm like,

I've been asking to have sex with you and like have, have a more exciting sex life and everything. And you're denying me left and right. And then I learned that, You know, you have this like sex dungeon that, you know, caught me by surprise. And you're doing all these things. And I feel like I didn't even know who he was anymore. Yeah. So, you know, I just felt like he was living this secret life. And that's a huge trigger for me because, you know, just like growing up, like there were a lot of secrets in my family.

So he knows this. So, so this was huge for me. So he just shuts down, refuses to talk. angry, he's ashamed, he said he doesn't want to talk about it. He even, like, screamed saying, we're getting divorced. And I'm like, what? Where is this coming from? And he later told me, like, he was so overwhelmed and he thought, like, he was so ashamed of who he is, that he thought there's absolutely no way that I would ever want to look at him again. So, and he, and he, and he wound up getting in his car and leaving. That would freak me out because he was so,

like, disregulated and, like, out of control that I was like, I don't want him driving. Yeah, worried for safety. Right. So when I found everything in February, I wound up going into like this deep dive into podcasts. Like, so I was listening to yours and like one's about pegging and like different things just trying to learn more about different lifestyles. And, you know, try like, because I'm open. I really am open. And he knows this about me.

And this is what what drives me crazy is like I don't understand what else to do. So. Yeah. I tried bringing it up a few times. I even said, you know, I want to do these things with you. Like, I want to do things that, like, I don't want you to have to hide who you are. I want you to be happy in your body. And I want to explore these things with you. And I even told him, like, it's pretty hurtful to me that you're not comfortable with me enough to explore this with me. So he wrote me this letter because he said he just couldn't talk to me. about it like face to face. So he wrote me a letter about how he started getting into transsexual porn when he was in high school before he even met me. And, you know, things in his life had happened where there was like stressful parts in his life. And during those stressful moments, he found himself like going deeper and deeper into kinks and fetishes and different things.

And just wanting to try out everything. And just really living. this secret life. He also said, like he made it very clear that he does not identify as, you know, a different gender. He, he feels masculine. He knows he's a man. He's not interested in being with a man. He's, he made things very clear. And said, I'm sure you want to talk about more, but I'm just not ready yet. So, you know, since then, every so often, I'd bring it up. I'd bring it up like when we were having sex. I'd mention like, hey, you know, like, do you want to try something new? Or like, how about you bring one of your toys into the bedroom?

Or do you want to try anything on me? Or, you know, I would give him the opportunity to explore this more. And I even said, like, do you, because there was another time where I came home and I, he was wearing sweatpants. And I noticed that I could see the outline of like women's underwear under the sweatpants. Oh, wow. And so I was like kind of like being silly and teasing him because it honestly did not bother me. And like what bothers me is that he's hiding it. Of course.

Especially now you know and you've just made it very clear that you're okay and he still will not like be honest about it. It's really about not being able to be honest about it with himself, right? That comes first. Right. Right. And he's made that very clear that he's ashamed of it. So like when he noticed him wearing. that underwear, I, like, kind of like spanked his butt a little bit and was like, and he was like,

what are you doing? I'm like, hey, like, can I see your underwear? And I like tried to pull his pants down and he's like, and he got so angry. And he's like, leave me alone. And he like ran upstairs to get changed. He was like mortified about it. But I was being silly and like, I wasn't making fun of him in any way. I was like being like trying to be sexy about it, but apparently it backfired. At this point, I'm trying anything. So, you know, every couple of, weeks, I would bring it up again. I'd give him plenty of opportunities. I even mentioned, like, would you ever want to try pegging? Like, I'm open to that. And he was like, yeah, maybe one day. And then he never brought it up again. And when I would bring it up, he would say, like,

he's not ready to do that yet. So then, like, recently, there was something else that happened where I was suspicious about something. Oh, he, he's, like, not on social media. He hates social media. He hits all of that stuff. So one day I see an alert pop up on his phone again, and it's for Snapchat. And I'm like, he, first of all, he doesn't talk to anyone. He really, like, doesn't have many friends because he chooses not to have many friends. Like, he's very introverted. So I was like, what is he doing on Snapchat?

But who is he talking to on Snapchat? And then when I brought it up, he was like, I was just playing around with it. You're so suspicious. Then, like, there's nothing to worry about. And I'm like, no, you're talking to someone. Like, who are you talking to? and he wouldn't tell me. So that pissed me off.

So every time something pisses me off, I tend to like stoop around a little bit again. So I go into the basement again and I find, I find more clothes of mine and some, you know, other dildos and stuff like that. And I just told him, like, you know, it doesn't bother me that you want to dress up. And I'm like, why don't you wear like sexy underwear to bed or like under your clothes or something like that doesn't bother me. like I would love to like see you in that like I'm I'm really open I can't stress enough how open I have been and like welcoming I have been but he just denies that every time so I guess he blew up again and he's like I'm just throwing everything out I don't know why you can't trust me so I'm just going to throw everything else so he like made made a show of like these two big garbage bags and throwing them in the trash and I was like I'm like why are you throwing this stuff out like I want to try these things with you and like I'm like I'm open to it. Like, I don't understand why you're throwing it out. And he's like, no, if you want to do things in the future, we'll buy new stuff. I just don't want to deal with this anymore. And I want you to, I don't know why you can't trust me. So after he did that, he, that was a few days ago. And then

I'm doing his laundry the other day. And I see a tag of like a clothing tag in his pocket that like fell out in the dryer. And it was like, it was clearly like a women's clothing tag. So I looked it up on Amazon and it's like sexy lingerie tag like for like for a company that does sexy lingerie. And I was just so I haven't even brought that up to him yet because I don't even know where to start. So I was hoping to get your advice too. But at this point it's like I don't even know what else to do. But what's upsetting me is the lying and really like I just feel like it's deceit at this point. Because like I just feel like I don't know who he is and I feel like I'm married to a stranger. And to be honest, I'm getting to the point right now where I don't know how much longer I'm going to last in this relationship if he doesn't start opening up to me.

Right. And I can imagine considering, you know, we can't take away the fact that this is probably very triggering for you on another level because you have this whole thing that happened to you when you were younger where you lived with all these secrets. And now you're kind of living it out. And I do believe that we do attract people into our lives to tell us. us our stories that we are telling ourselves so we could learn from them, right? Like you can't go back to that family and have them tell you their secret, right? And fix things for you. But you can attract a partner into your life that has a big secret and then try to get them to tell to you. And then you fix your fucking story, right?

Like it's kind of interesting that you are, you know, living this whole thing out. And it's so parallel to what you went through when you were younger. So I'm thinking like it must be very triggering for you on that level too. There's like two big things going on here. You're just a woman, you know, that, you know, has this guy. You know everything and he still can't be honest and he's still continuing to lie. So you have that basic thing that anyone would flip out about. But you also have this other thing where this is something that is triggering for you because

of what happened to you when you were younger. So it's like it's difficult. And you sound so positive considering, which I give you credit for you. I'm trying. Yeah. And it's just like, let me ask you this. Okay. because I talk to your husband all the time.

Okay. Like I know your husband. And I understand why he's doing. This has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him. Like you keep saying, like, I wish he could be honest with me. You don't understand. Like, I could accept it. Like, everything you say about, like, it's all on him.

He can accept it. You know, it's probably the reason why he has no friends. Like all those things that you said he's a very introvert. It's probably because he has this massive, deep secret that he framed in his head as the most shameful thing when he was younger, right? And he's been holding on to that. And it has been ruling his life. He hasn't been able to have friends. He hasn't been able to be honest with his wife, even when she's like so as fucking cool as you and is accepting. And he still can't face it. That's not a you thing. That's a him thing. You know, did you ever like tell him like maybe like to seek like counseling or talk to someone about it? Like have you been? able to have like a long discussion with him about the fetish, considering that you've done a lot

of research, right? And you have been learning? Like, have you ever said, can we please just sit down and talk about like this as a fetish and stuff? Yep. I even, I even mentioned the podcast that I've been listening to. Yeah. I asked him if, like, there's any particular podcast that he's listened to that, like, could explain some things to me that he would want me to listen to or any porn that he would want to share with me that I can watch or like, you know, anything. I really am open to anything. But what does he say when you say those things? I'll think about it.

Right. But did you ever just like instead of asking, like just saying, you know, when he walks into the bedroom, like just start playing something? Like maybe you have to like like start, you know, you really need to listen to the episode I just aired this Friday, which is Carter's episode. Carter's a hoser. It's like the title is Carter's a hoser and his girlfriend won't wear a hose for him. And I go fucking off on him because I'm like, you don't understand.

He wants his girl to wear a hose, but like she doesn't get it, right? Like she doesn't understand. Like you have to explain it to her. And you just got to like, you just can't stop asking and just like tell her. I think you have to like change your approach, especially because you're starting to consider like, hey, am I going to stay with this person? And that's a valid thing. Am I going to stay with this person if he's never going to open up to me?

You know, like how are you going to survive in that kind of a marriage? Or you're just going to be able to accept it. I don't know. You're kind of out of crossroads, right? he's never going to open up to me, you know, like how are you going to survive in that kind of a marriage? Or you're just going to be able to accept it. I don't know. You're kind of out of crossroads, right? There are two ways to go. You know, you can leave him if he never opens up like you say. And you're starting to think about that. And that's a scary thing, right? As well as you could just kind of stay and accept it. But, you know,

what's the other alternative is like him finally accepting it in himself and being able to be open about it with himself and be able to like sort of accept it in himself. and therefore then release it. And what would be great is if he could come to that moment right now because right now he has a woman sitting across from him that would be totally fucking down with it and okay with it. And he's so stuck on the shame of this all right and feeling so weirded out about himself to be able to even understand that amazing opportunity

that's right in front of his face because he, like I said, has been living with this since he's been a little kid hiding feeling so horrible about himself and so weird and so alone, you know, because like nowadays, you could go, you're lucky you found this shit now that you could go and listen to a podcast. Like, you know, imagine you found this 20 years ago. You'd be like, what the fuck? There'd be no way to get any information.

What would you go to an encyclopedia? You'd be like, really feel alone, you know? Now you could go online and be like, oh, there's so much information. But when these guys of this generation were dealing with these fetishes, like they had nobody to tell. So there is so much shame and guilt and stuff tied into it and they frame it in such a way. Like when I was talking to Carter the Hoser, I'm like, I get that you have this framed in your head. Like this is so weird and crazy and stuff. But you just need to like sort of own it and put it out there and reframe it. You know, but like your husband is the one that needs to do the work. And he needs to, it can't be like, you know, I don't know what your type of personality type is or, you know, I know that sometimes when you have somebody that's just so.

closed off. It's almost like, you know, how do you sort of penetrate them? I don't know. But, you know, maybe you need to start instead of asking him to listen to a podcast saying, hey, let's go for a ride and like just trapping him in the car and turn something the fuck on and make him listen and just start having him face it with you there helping him. Like I said, he's got the most amazing opportunity right now to finally have such a major moment in his life, which which is sort of accepting himself for exactly who he is. And then when he does that, he actually has a partner who's also okay with it. That is like top of the mountain for any guy that's into what he's into.

And I've talked to hundreds of guys like him. Right. And, you know, I listen to your podcast in every episode where the guys are like, you know, my girlfriend isn't into it or, you know, she denies me and just tells me to do it on my own. And I'm just like, I'm here. Like, I'm literally asking. him, please. Like, I want to do this. I want to explore. And to be honest, I'm like, it's, it's kind of exciting to explore new things. And I'm, like, super into it. Yeah, you're like, we can

have a whole new sex life. Now you get why the sex wasn't so great. He has this whole kinky side that he just wouldn't let you into. So, like, and listen, a fetish is a fetish, meaning that, like, you know, the difference between, like, a fetish and a kink is like that you actually need that stuff to get turned on, right? And now it makes sense why he, the sex sort of like went out the window, you know, and he's getting all his, like, himself off and doing all his stuff. But you would be right there with him. You're like, oh, now we could have a fucking sex life, right? Like, you're ready to jump on board with whatever he wants. So he really, oh my God, like, he really needs to listen to this episode. This is the episode you need to get him in the car. Fucking trap him,

okay. And turn it on. What is he going to do? Jump out of the car? He might. It's okay. Drive on the highway. I mean, is he going to kill himself? Don't go down the side roads. Do you You know what I mean? You have to, like the I don't know, the whatever, you know, like I get where he's coming from because I've heard it. There are so many guys. There are those guys out there, like you said, that you listen to that they've already come out of the closet for one way or the other. And their wives are like okay with it, but they don't want to engage. But there are so many that are like your husband living a double life. And what's interesting to me, and I say this all the time with cheaters and stuff. And as you were telling your story, I was thinking this thing.

Like I just feel like sometimes there is like a subconscious thing going on where somebody wants to get caught, right? Because like, you know, you're married to this guy your whole life, right? You never find one fucking thing. And then boom, all of a sudden, sloppiness galore. Like you are just finding everything. Like on some level, I believe some part of him. And he's not, he can't get to that part of him yet. It's the better part of him.

It's a subconscious part of him. wants to be fucking done with this, wants to come out of the closet, or else he wouldn't have just fucking been so sloppy. Like, why did you never find out before? Or maybe you're ready to finally deal with your thing. But now is the time because you were both sort of living with this secret for so long. And then all of a sudden, it just all just like came out. And I don't believe that that's a coincidence. I believe that this is a moment of massive change for somebody. And hopefully it's for the two of you. It's a massive thing for you, especially because of where

you came from. You are now ready to face the fucking secrets of your family, right? And like, deal with it and face it and be okay with it and come to terms with it and stuff. That's powerful for you. He's sloppy enough to leave all his shit out there so that he could stop living

with this double life. Do you know how painful that is and how exhausting that is to live like that for your husband? So I do believe on some level, some part of him, that pure part of him, that whole part of him, that part of him that wants him to accept him for him, the part of him that does love himself and accepts this in him, wants him, like, you know, made him get caught.

I believe shit like that happens. Like I said, if that's a shift in you or in him, somebody's shifting here. And, you know, hopefully you guys will shift together because it's such a great opportunity for you to, for him to come out and be who he is and finally accept himself for who he is. And it's, and it's for you, it's great because you could finally be with the man that you married fully. You know what I mean? Because like, he has this whole other side that you never knew, but you're willing to accept it. You're down with it.

Yeah. You know, he just needs to, you know, he needs, like, listen, there are sex therapists that could really help him. Like, is he the type that whatever, or is he just so close up, he would never go, no. He would never. I have brought it up so many times. I've brought up couples counseling before any of this even came out, like years ago. and he has just always been so resistant to it. Just, nope, I'm not going to.

I don't want to tell people my problems. Like, he is closed. Yeah, because of, because look at what he knows about himself. He likes fucking dressing up in girls clothes and fucking himself in the ass and tying himself up and videotaping it. Like, think about how he feels about that,

doing that secretly all this time. It's a, it doesn't feel good. You know, there's a part of him that can't stop doing it, but there's a part of him that feels really guilty about it at the same time, I'm sure. Like that's why he keeps shutting you down. Like, you know, you're never able, like, have you ever had longer than, it just sounds like these are like very quick conversations.

Like, let me just tell me or do this or like, can we try this? And he just like gives you like one sentence answers. Like there's never like long discussions about this. No, because like there'll be talks about it, but it will just be me talking. And I'm like, can you give me some feedback? Like what are some of the things that, you know, do you have anything to add or anything? like, can you answer a question or two? And he just, like, he'll, he won't talk.

I'm not ready to talk. Or he'll get angry and just leave the room. You know, he, I cannot keep him in a place to talk. Or if he is waiting, you know, he's, it's, there's no, there's no, like, give and take. It's just me talking. He's like a closed door. He just shuts you down. Even after you finding out everything.

And the interesting thing is he keeps saying to you, like, why don't you trust me? You don't trust me. Exactly. I'm like, this is why. No, but it's like he doesn't trust himself. Like, it's really just, it's really, like I said, it's his own problem with himself. The fact that you are actually open to it and haven't left him and didn't walk the fuck out after finding out all the stuff is like, you know, is what he should be focusing on. Him turning it around on you and saying, you don't trust me is crazy.

You shouldn't trust him, first of all. He's been lying to you your whole marriage, all right? that's actually the truth of the situation, right? So it's not your fucking problem. You're acting actually better than you should in the situation. You could be very distrustful and very pissed off and very fucking angry and very a lot of things. And it would be totally valid. The fact that you were so evolved, when I put your confession on my Patreon to listen for people to listen to,

they were like, oh my God, her husband sounds like me, but he doesn't get it. like she's so open and awesome and I can't believe he doesn't understand how lucky he is. Like you're like fucking amazing how you're acting. So fuck him when he says you don't trust him. Like how can you trust him? Sorry. Yeah. I think I'm just at the point where I'm very frustrated and I'm ready to walk away.

And I even said to him, you know, I am so open. I'm so willing to do whatever you want. And the reason why I don't trust it is because things keep popping up. And I think what the biggest worry that I have is that, and I know you said it's not about me, but that I'm not enough for, I guess, his interest right now. Like maybe he cannot accept things to the point where I'm not what he's looking for. But he is so comfortable in our relationship. Well, no, no, no.

But you have to stop right there. Because I'm going to tell you, he, you are like, okay, you before, while he was dressing down in his basement and you were the vanilla wife upstairs and you wanted missionary and you guys, were just having regular sex and sometimes he could put it in your ass like yeah that wasn't enough for him obviously right he had all this other stuff but you as the woman that wants to fucking peg him that wants him to wear panties to bed that will fuck him when he's wearing you know your lingerie you are fucking right for him okay you're everything that he would ever want he's not allowing that so it's not about you i promise you you you haven't given him you haven't been that person to even know

like you saying i feel like i'm not enough like i said you weren't enough before when there was this whole lie and there were signs of that there was like no sex in the marriage like what the fuck was going on right now you know um like because like i said when someone has a fetish it's like something they need to get off sexually and that's why i say like these guys have to explain it to their wives so that they know but it's not you're willing to engage his fetish and trust me if you did and he allowed you to you would be everything for him but you know right now you're not because he's not willing to accept it he's not willing to go there with you And that's still a him problem.

It's not you. I get you walking because he can't get a place to a place where he allows you to feel like you could do that. Because I get why as a woman you feel like not enough. We're always going to feel that way, right? You're always going to personalize things, right? And that's a terrible place for you as a woman to live. Like, I don't know how old you are, but, you know, you should be feeling great about yourself. And there's nothing great about being with a man that doesn't fucking want you and would rather

be like downstairs by himself wearing your clothes, right? It's not going to make you feel hot or sexy or good about yourself. And you deserve that. But you are. And I even did this whole overhaul of like I threw out all my underwear and I like Victoria Secret just had a really big sale and I bought tons of underwear like really sexy underwear. Like really upgraded everything. And then a few days later I find the lingerie tag that he had bought.

And I'm just like, you know, it's just I feel like. I go so far and I'm trying to do these things and then I just get stuck. You might have, listen, how long ago? So this was February, right? Yeah. Okay. The whole big thing came out. I mean, it's been gradual over the past, I don't know, maybe four or five years where

I've like seen little things like some of my clothes or those dildos or like something. Right. I mean, listen, I don't know how long you give him, you know, until he, like to actually open up and let you in. But I think that's the, that's the only problem here. You have done everything right. You're doing all you can do. I'm thinking maybe it's just a little bit more time that he needs to be really ready to do what he needs to do, which is be really open and honest with himself. Because I think, you know, what, what you signify, is like you're like a reflection of himself.

Like him standing in front of you with panties on or fucking a dildo in front of you is like really coming to terms with the fact that that's who he is. Do you understand it's like it's more real? And I think that's what he's afraid to do.

It's that one little last step and he doesn't understand the fucking freedom that would come with that for himself. Well that's why I suggested to him like wearing underwear to bed. Like you're not We don't even have to look at each other, but maybe just like rubbing up against me while we're in bed together. Maybe it's like that less vulnerability for him.

That's where I was coming from, is like not feeling as vulnerable, like just standing in front of me, wearing lingerie and me just like staring at him. If once he gets to the point where he's okay to do it, like those little baby steps are great, you know, you're coming to. But I just think it's that initial thing of his, in his own mind of saying like he's ready to make all of this a reality. Because I think the hiding and the secretness of it is a way of somebody sort of not fully accepting that part of themselves. And I do believe like him doing anything with you at this point, even just copping to it and just being open to it with you would be fully. fully admitting to himself that this is who he is. And I think that that's his biggest fear. I think he doesn't want to do it,

even though the truth is is this is who he is. Do you know what I mean? This is who he is. I just don't know when it will happen. I don't know if it will ever happen. And I even, when he gave me a bag of my clothes back, because I said, I don't mind that you dress up. I just, if you could ask me for my clothes,

I didn't even say, don't wear my clothes. I just said, if you could ask me, me for things or like wear them and put them back or you know anything like that so when he gave me a bag of my clothes i left out two dresses that i don't wear and i just like left them on his side of our bedroom and he was like what are these doing here and i'm like well i just figured like i'm not wearing them so if you want them you can have them and he was just like well i don't want them and he threw them in my closet i'm trying here oh my god it's so it's so crazy how like so many cross-chesters will be listening to this episode like dying for a woman like you and who gets a woman like you,

a guy who can't even fucking get how lucky he is. You know, isn't that crazy? It's so life, right? It's like it really makes no sense. But I do believe the opportunity is there. Now, I don't know, like, I mean, maybe you have to give yourself a certain amount of time of how long you'll, you know, give him to get to the point where he's ready. to fully come out and be open with this stuff and engage with you. I feel like you've tried so much. It might be a matter of time. I don't know.

It might be never. And then you're going to have to make a decision. And maybe you do wind up leaving him. And that's a sad story for him, you know. You'll go on and be okay because you're ready for the truth. You're open to the truth. You're down for the fucking truth. But he's not.

And that's therein lies the problem. I'm hoping, like I said, that on some level, him getting caught is a sign that he is almost ready. He just might not be ready right now. But maybe three months from now, something's going to happen where it's just going to click for him. You know, it's kind of all out there. You know, right? You're throwing things. He's still not ready.

But maybe he give him like at least a year, like by February and keep trying and doing things. because it's just a switch in his brain that he needs to do. And sometimes it's like, you know, you feel like, like a lot of times when the light bulb goes off and like you feel like you have that moment where you realize everything, you think that like everything was just that moment, but everything before that moment did help you get to that moment. So I do believe if he has that moment three months from now, everything you're trying now, trust me, it is not in vain.

It is helping him. You doing that. And I think that you should continue, right? and maybe try new things, like I said, like instead of asking him, telling him, forcing him, like you get in the car, like, you got to listen to this, you know, podcast. Like, let's listen to it together. Just keep doing that kind of stuff because it might, you know, when he's ready, if you're still there, like it will all come together.

I will say, I've been trying different things when we have been having sex. Okay. I've been a little bit more aggressive in my approach. You know, I think in the past I've been a little bit more submissive. but like now I've been I kind of played around with like holding his arms back a little bit more and he seems to really like it. So I was trying to be just a little bit more dominant. Oh, you know, they love that. Yeah.

Right. And I'm totally down for that. And then I'll try to talk to him after like, hey, did you like that? Like, what did you like? What did you not like? And he's like, yeah, no, it was really hot. I like that. And then we stopped there and I don't really get anything else out.

But another thing that I forgot to mention before was, This was probably over a year ago. There were a few times where on his phone, I saw a call coming in and it said, Mistress is calling. And when I asked him about that, I was like, you know, what is that? He's like, oh, that's just spam. And I'm like, I don't think it would say mistress is calling. So, like, I don't know.

Like, is he talking to Adam out there? Like, I don't even know what's going on. And I think that's what's pissing me off is that I feel too in the. dark about things. If he wanted to go to a dom together, hey, I'm down. Like, I will do anything. I really, I'm like, I just be a whole idea. I want to slap him in the face. I'm going to shake him. So do I. Can you have him call me? Can he call into my show? He would never. He's probably a listener or he's on my patron already. Who knows? Well, if he's, if he's listening, hey, you know, you know this is about you. You never know. And I'm willing to do anything you want.

Listen, what do you think he's, you think he doesn't live in this world of knowing all this stuff and talking to other people? I mean, you just don't know, right? Because he's not, he's still closed off and not telling you, right? Like, imagine. And, you know, that is a common thing. But I think that that's really smart that you're doing, you're being a little dumb and in the bedroom. Yeah. And I'm totally down for it.

What I'm having a problem with, though, is like now right, I'm like balancing. I want to do all these things. and I want to explore them, but I'm also really fucking pissed at him. Of course. He's possibly talking to other people and he's not being honest with me. So it's like, in a way, I want to withhold sex from him. But then I'm like, but I feel like that's what he wants anyway and just doing his own thing. But at the same time, I want to show him how open I am.

So I really feel like I'm straddling this line of like, I don't even know what I want right now. No, because both things can exist at the same time. But how confusing is that? Like, you're so pissed at, like, you're a human being. And like you, the woman, you as a woman who's married to this man who's like fucking lying to her. Like, you know, like I get that you feel that way. And I also get that, you know, the part of you that loves your husband and wants to stay with your husband is wants to work it out with the husband is trying all those things. And, you know, having both of those things going on at the same time is very confusing.

But you're a human being. And that's what being a human being is about. And sometimes it's not, it's not black and white. You're in a fucked up position. And, you know, you know, you might want to go talk to somebody yourself because I think that could really help you because that is a lot for you to deal with. And that's why I've been so excited to talk to you because I, out of respect for him, I haven't shared this with anyone. And I'm a very social person. I have a lot of really close friends that I share everything with.

But I know how shameful this is for him. And I don't, I would never want it to come out that I shared any of this with him. And like, and like you said, I love him. I would never want to hurt him in any way. So can you lock him in the car and have him listen to this episode when it airs? I don't know. He'd be so mad. Who cares?

Look how mad you got and at him. Like, look at what he's done to you. Who cares if he gets mad? I mean, what's the big deal? Is he going to leave you if he gets mad? Where is he going to go with his big bag of dildos? I mean, come on. Sorry.

Who cares if he gets mad? Shouldn't he be the one that's like he's made you so mad? Look what he's done to you. You can make him mad. It's okay. Right. And I have to say, and I shared this with him as well, when he wrote me that letter, it was like a three-page letter about how he was into trans porn and that, you know,

different things that he was interested in and how he's ashamed of himself because of it. Of course. when so he he gave that letter to me and then he left the house and he said call me when you're done reading it but take the time to read it and like don't call me right after i want you to like calm down after and but i called him immediately and i was like come home right now i'm like honestly this is even after reading all of this this is the most attracted that i've ever been to you because you're finally vulnerable with me and that's all i'm looking for is like that vulnerability and honesty which he's never given me that's so That's so beautiful. You know what I mean? Like so many people just hearing that are like, oh my God. Like how like this fucking guy? Like nothing scared me away.

None of what he said. Wait. So when you said that, what did he say? He just, he's like, you're patronizing me. I'm like, what do you? Like he, he just, he cannot believe that this is the honest feelings that I have. He is so insecure about everything that's going on within him. Listen, self-esteem.

Like I always like self-esteem. It comes from yourself, right? Like, it's like the girl that, like, has a great body, but feels terrible about it and is so self-conscious. And everybody tells her how great she is, but she can't believe it. I mean, it doesn't matter what you say. He's not going to believe it. But did you ever ask him to, like, write you more letters?

Like, have you ever maybe said, like, hey, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, why don't you respond to me by writing me another letter and maybe that way, you know, or something? I don't know. Because obviously, like, you know, for him to come clean, I forgot about that. Like, that whole letter, like, really caught. you know, that was pretty amazing. That was probably a very big moment for him, you know, and that just shows, you know,

how he likes to do things. You know, he doesn't, you know, maybe he doesn't want to face you right when he says stuff, you know, like whatever. That's specific to him. Like, have you ever maybe said, hey, let's like have this conversation. I want more information or this is what I want or whatever and say, you know, why don't you get back to me in a letter that I could read and you could leave the house or something? You know, maybe that's a good way to.

do it? I've tried it. And he says, his famous words, I'll think about it. But I also wanted to tell you that I recently listened to your, I recently listened to your episode with, I think her name was Ariel. It was from February, I think. And I loved that episode because he cheated on her and then she found out and they just like started exploring more and more things in the bedroom. And then they were on like Twitter and Reddit and things like that. And then now they have like this great sex life. Like that's, that's my dream. That's what I'm hoping for.

I want to do all these things. And that can be. I think you might need to give it a little bit more time, right? Because it's only since February. And this is a very big thing in his life. You know, it is a huge moment for him. And if you think about, you know, how old's your husband? We're in our mid-30s.

Okay. So he's young. But he's been holding on to this. since he's like, you know, a little kid, right? So he's had all these years of like repressing it and living with all the shame. So it's not like just because you find he found out you were ready to come clean and you're fine with it that he's going to be right there with you right at the same time, right? Like always we want the person to be ready to like be where we are. But sometimes it takes a little bit longer for other people, you know? And maybe it will be a little bit long. Maybe he just

needs a little bit longer. But you really hope that he could get to that place because these are the things that can break up a relationship because like one person is open and has evolved and wants to be a certain place and the other person just is not going along for the ride. Like this is his moment and he's a young guy. Like I'm sorry. What is he going to do? Go get another woman if you left him and get one who, you know, and then live this whole life until she finds out and then just keep closing it down. He just, I do think you need to lock him down in the car and drive around and let him listen to this episode. Let him get mad. I don't know why you care. Not, oh, think about yourself. No, like, what do you mean? Oh, my gosh. Why do people so afraid

to get other people mad? I'm not a people pleaser, so I don't understand it. It's okay. Like, it could be like a, if getting him mad, okay, and getting him to the place where he has some sort of emotions when you're pushing him into a place that is uncomfortable enough or to get him mad, like maybe that will help him. Maybe asking him and waiting for him isn't doing him any fucking favors. Like, I don't know. I'm a tough love person. I don't care about people being mad or upset or anything because I think those are the pivotal

moments in life, you know, like sometimes. And sometimes that is what's needed for massive change to happen. So get him fucking mad. Who cares? Get him mad. Look at how mad you've been. And you're not even allowing yourself. to be as mad as you can be.

I think at this point, I'm focusing on the fact that I'm still young and if if this relationship doesn't work out, like, I honestly want to be like, set me free if you don't want me because... Well, you could set yourself free. You don't need him to, okay? You could...

But I love him so much. Well, you don't need to say, listen, you have to make decisions for yourself. It will be your... Like, he doesn't need to set you free. You're going to eventually set you free. And in a weird way, like, he will, depending on how he acts moving forward, right? Like, do you actually think you're going to be with him two years from now if, like,

he's still lying to you and he's still doing this stuff and he's still shutting you down? I don't know, because I want to say no, but I'm also kind of a pussy when it comes to things like that. Like, I don't. And I think he's, yes, we have two. And I think that, so, you know, obviously that's another thing that keeps me with him. but I think he knows that I'm not going anywhere. Well, that's why I don't understand why getting him mad is that big of a deal. Don't you know that he's not going anywhere?

Like, he knows you're not going anywhere, but I don't think you know that he's not going anywhere because you're afraid to just like fucking trap him in a car or make him listen to a podcast. God forbid he gets mad. It's like, who cares? I honestly, like, and to be completely honest, and I don't mean to take this into a like depressing turn. But I do worry about his mental health. Like his mental health is so bad. And, you know, he, I just, I worry.

Well, his mental health is not, listen, you know, it's like the alcoholic who's like drinking. Like, everybody kind of needs a bottom. And I know that that is a very scary place for somebody that's with the person that needs the bottom to just watch them head towards, right? Because you're like, all you want to do is stop someone from driving into a tree, right? And fucking crashing. but you know what is his mental health going to be you know five years from now if he just keeps this secret of problem like on the other side of him getting mad about listening to a podcast or getting to a point where he has a bottom and his mental health maybe goes really down maybe there comes

like that moment of like pure acceptance and he's sick of being that way and feeling that way and that's what sort of motivates him to change like right now it's kind of like um like asking and just bringing it up and being nice and all that stuff is okay for now. And I say give him longer and that's all helping him. But at a certain point, you might want to like push him into like uncomfortable places. That might be the most loving thing you could do for him to help him get to where he needs to be. Because when he gets to the place where you want him to go, he will be so fucking happy. He just doesn't get that yet.

He's so afraid. He's afraid. to fully accept this part of himself. But this is the perfect time for him to do it. He's still young and he's got an amazing wife, the mother of his kids, who's fucking down with it. How's he going to get mad listening to this podcast?

He'll be laughing. No, I don't see that. I think he's just so ashamed that even though, even if I tell him my voice has changed, everything's anonymous, he's, in his mind, everyone who knows us is going to know now. Oh, that's what you think you would think.

Yeah, like he's just so deep in this shame that he can't understand. And you never want him to think that that would happen because that's like this, you know, that's awful. And I've heard, listen, I've heard of people getting busted and, and then their wives actually going and telling people like real spiteful shit could go down. And that's like the worst thing you could ever do someone. And obviously you calling into my show that it's like the opposite of what you, you don't want him to do that. And if he's going to feel that way, of course, you don't want. him to feel that way, right? Or let's do this, okay? Now, we decided when I posted your confession on my Patreon, I do all the anonymous confessions there. It's probably going to go up. It's definitely

going to go up on a Confessions Hotline episode two soon. But when I posted it already on my Patreon, I got so many cross-dressers wanting to, like, give you advice. So what we're going to do is you are going to call back in. We're going to air this episode. People are going to write in and give you advice, whether they're women that went through this or cross-justers that, you know, totally understand where your husband is because that's what we need to talk. That's what we need here, right? We need the guy that's where your husband is at. The introverted guy that doesn't, that feels so shameful about, you know, and somebody that's on the other side of it, right? But I'm sure there's many people that could totally relate to exactly where your husband is at now. You know, we need to

get in we need to get that guy on the phone with us right and let's have a conversation with that person and see if we could get you some advice from that person and then I'll air that episode on my patreon right but we'll put a call out to everybody to do it right and I'll pick the perfect person to get on and then let's do another call and see maybe like and get advice from like it's like getting advice from your husband right like how to get him to the other side but we want somebody. I'm putting the call out to like a cross-dresser who's been where your husband is at now, but has also gotten to the other side. Like that's what we need, right? That's who we need to talk to. Yeah, I would love that. That would be so helpful. And trust me, we're going to find that because I have a

huge audience for my cross-dressing episodes and stuff, especially because I'm going to put this out on a fetish Friday, as well as for my Patreon members. I have like a ton of people over there. And like I said, I already got people saying, could I get on the call and talk to her? I want to give her advice and stuff like that. So we'll do that episode over on my Patreon, but I'm putting the call out to everybody. So even if there's somebody listening that wants to do that,

we'll bring them on a call with you. And we will reconvene and see if they could give you even better advice. But I still say, pick another episode and lock them in the car while you're waiting and just let them listen. But keep, keep, don't stop doing what you're doing. Give him a little bit more. more time, you know, pick a time in a day. And maybe you get a therapist to be able to talk

this shit out. You need somebody to talk to through this to help you navigate. You do need to sometimes get angry and think about your anger for him and stuff. I'm not saying you need to lash out on him, you know, like take it out on him. But, you know, if you had a therapist, they would maybe allow you or that would be a safe place for you to, you know, sort of work through those feelings. Because those feelings are there. Eventually they're going to, you're going to start to feel resentful, you know. So I think. you need to like talk this out more not just with me and you know you would really help for you to get your own therapist on the side as well for sure yeah i have a therapist and i love her but i haven't

shared any of this with her this is the first time i have ever spoken about this and it honestly it feels so good kathy to be able to express it to someone but that's how it'll feel if you tell your therapist yeah that's what that's what you can have that that's what therapy is about right 45 minutes once a week checking it's like church for people right that one time a week where you could just like really restabilize like imagine going in and being able to talk like this, you know, every week, once a week and just like to get this all out because there's a lot going on for you, you know? It's one thing for you to be helping him, but you're also like, you're also going through shit because of this. That is just, you know, and you have to take care

of you. You know, you're in a tough position. You have a lot to handle right now. So you should definitely be talking to someone yourself. But we're going to talk again. Okay? Because I'm having you back on. Put in the call out. I'm able to. I'm able to. I'm airing this next Friday. So right after it airs, you know, give me like a week. I'll get back to and we'll reconvene and we'll do another conversation. Okay. Sounds good. Thank you. All right. I'll let you know when it comes on. We'll talk soon. Good luck in the meantime. Okay. Bye. Thank you. All right. Bye. Okay. I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly anonymous confession, secret sex lives of total strangers is now available,

not only in paperback and ebook, but you can pre-order the audiobook. It's still not going to be out until August 25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show. I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like there's a hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story. Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person. And they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it. in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like erotica. I don't really like that kind of

vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them. They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read one or two and then skip around. You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format. And finally, the audiobook is available. coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now. And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way than getting the link from me. Okay, I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there. Everybody shares content with each other. And that's what you get to do there. You could post your own pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of

contest where you can win a lot of money. It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it. I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my discord. It's private, like I said. All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook, or the paperback. Sent it to me at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. And I will say, send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous Podcast. Good news. Strictly Anonymous Podcast is looking for people to call into the show.

So if you lead an interesting, naughty secret life that you want to talk about while remaining anonymous or not anonymous, if you're out and proud, that's cool too. Send me an email, Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com. Strictly Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com, or go to my website, strictly anonymous podcast.com and click on, be on the show. If you have a short confession that you want to get off your back, call my Confessions Hotline, 347-4-203579. That's 347-4-7-4-2. You could call that number 24-7. I change all the voices on the confessions too, so you remain anonymous, the number, the website, and the email address, will all be in the description.

If you want to follow the show, follow me at Strict Anonymous on either Instagram or Twitter. That's at Strict Anonymous. And if you want to sign up for my Patreon, you're not only supporting my show, but you're going to get all of these episodes early and ad free. You're going to get anonymous picks of all of my guests.

Most of the girls send me in anonymous hot picks of themselves, and some of the guys are sending me in anonymous picks as well. You also get access to my private Discord, where people are getting super naughty. If you sign up for my Discord, you could post whatever you want and talk to my other listeners. To sign up for my Patreon,

just go to patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. That's patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast. The links and everything else I spoke about are all in the description. Thanks so much for listening.