Strictly Anonymous Confessions - 991 - Brian on Being Bisexual, Swinging, Working in the Adult Entertainment World and More
Episode Date: December 18, 2024Brian called in to talk all about swinging, finding out he was bi, working in the adult entertainment biz and a lot more. Tune in to hear all the details including how and why he grew up and wound up ...working in the adult industry, the huge adult entertainment gentleman’s club he worked at and what he did there, how and why he got out of the biz and moved to a small town and how he met his current partner, how and why he was always non- monogamous, how his past open relationships were then the one he is in now, how he came to realize he was into guys so much later in life, how his girl went out and found his first guy, what went down at his forte hook up and how he felt afterwards, how he has become a switch over time, the stigma surrounding guy on guy action and how the swinger world is guilty of it too, how he’s treated because he’s bisexual in the swinger world, how he gets hit up by many married guys who are hiding it, their first bisexual swinger party in Vegas that they attended and what went down, why he prefers to play with gay men or men who are out and proud, howhe loves performing oral on both men and women, how he is very much an alpha guy and into guys at same time, how important it is to communicate with y0ur partner about what they might be into, how he helps guys come out as bi plus a whole lot more You can find their podcast and all their other stuff here: https://www.frontporchswingers.com **To see pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! MY BOOK IS NOW OUT FOR PRE-ORDER!!!! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY NOW: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To Join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at strictlyanonymouspodcast@gmail.com or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show" Have something quick you want to confess while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. You can call 24/7. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://beducate.me/anonymous40 Get BEDucated! For 40% off PLUS a FREE 24-hour trial, click the link and use code: anonymous https://bluechew.com Get your first month FREE! https://butterwellness.com/ Try the Butter Wellness perineum massager and use code STRICTLY for 20% off your entire order Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ Twitter https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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take you to the browser and sign up there. You'll get the right price. Okay, today I have on Brian.
Brian from Brian and Brenna from poor swingers.
When I talked to him last when they were on my show recently,
we had a great conversation.
He did touch upon the fact that he like hooks up with guys sometimes.
And I was like, oh, and you know, he's in the swinger world.
And I was like, oh, there's such a fucking stigma,
even in the swinger world for guy and guy action.
And I'm like, you know, you need to come back on and we need to talk about it.
And that's what we talk about on this episode.
And it's such an interesting conversation.
We talk about his experience in the lifestyle when he was younger,
how he got into it, what he did.
and, you know, how he stumbled upon into it, actually.
He was working in the adult entertainment business when he was very young.
And he talks about that whole journey and how come, like, what he was doing when he was younger
sort of blocked his interest in men.
And he talks about how he eventually found out that he was into guys.
He did talk about his first episode that it was Brenna that kind of asked him a question.
And we talked specifically about that and how he figured out that he might be into guys.
And then he talks about his experiences with men and how that went and what his first
experience was like.
All the experiences that followed.
We talk about the stigma around it and why it's such fucking bullshit.
He's an alpha man here to say that alpha men could be into guys and still remain a fucking alpha dude.
Okay.
And that's what I love about it.
I love that he's out and proud.
He really, he is.
He talks about this kind of stuff on his podcast to him and his girl Brenna.
I have a podcast called for Swingers.
You could go check that out.
I'll put a link in there.
But you're going to love his story.
He even gave a shout at the end.
If any guy, you know, who's like secretly by what needs help or wants to talk about it, he's open to like helping people.
So you could contact me and I'll put you in contact with him.
He's great.
You're going to love this conversation.
I'm going to be right back on with Brian.
Hey, Brian.
Welcome back to the strictly anonymous podcast.
How are you today?
I'm good.
Kathy.
Thank you so much.
Hey, Brian.
Listen, you, uh, you and Brenna, your girl.
We're just on my show recently.
You guys also have your own podcast called from Port Swingers.
You were just on.
We talked all about like your swinging and your hot wifing and your, you're,
new Polly thing that you have going on.
But what we also touched upon?
And I was like, oh, you need to come back on so we could talk about this a lot more is your
interesting guys.
Like when it came up with you with your girl and how she reacted, she kind of noticed
it in you.
She was the one that brought it up.
So I was like, we should have a whole discussion about that because it's so interesting
to me how guy and guy action, there's still such a stigma around it in the regular
world, but also in the swinger world.
And you're so heavily involved in that world.
So I was like, let's like talk about that, you know.
But what I want to first do is like get your backstory.
Was it Brenna that first made you realize?
Or were you, like, always kind of knew you were kind of maybe into guys when you were younger?
No, Brenna is the one really that kind of identified that.
You know, like we talked about when we spoke last.
She, you know, she and I would kind of play that game.
We'd be out at a bar or restaurant, you know, kind of picking the people out that we thought were hot in the group, you know.
And I would say something like, oh, that's a really attractive guy or whatever.
And she kind of go, huh, that's interesting, you know, and kind of, you know, put that in the back of her mind, file it away.
And over the course of time, we would just start having conversations about, you know, people that we were attracted to in sexuality. And she was the one that first said, you know, there's a, you might not be straight. And it just kind of, it just kind of hit me. I was like, well, I don't know. I never really thought about it because the truth is, I never had a chance to think about it from, you know, my past, I was a, in the adult entertainment space, my entire professional life. So I was always in the presence of women. And I was, you know, I always had women around me. And it never.
occurred to me that I might be anything other than straight until Brenna gave me the opportunity
to really think about it. And she was actually the, she was the catalyst for me meeting the first
guy I ever spent any time with. But wait, let's go back to your involvement in the adult
industry when you were younger. What, what are you talking about? Like, what were you doing? Because I feel
like I've gotten your guy's story, right? But I don't know that I've gotten your story solo. Like,
what did you do in the adult entertainment business when you were younger? Well, so I went to
I went to college in Atlanta, and my degree is in nutrition, research, and biology.
So while I went to, while I was going to college, and I went to culinary school at the same time,
I worked at the most prolific club, the gentleman's club, I think, in the world, the gold club in Atlanta.
Okay.
And so my father also owned gentlemen's clubs from the time I was a little boy.
Oh, interesting.
Okay.
You know, yeah, I grew up in the hospitality world.
The own bars and restaurants and that kind of thing.
So, in fact, Brennan and I just came back from the convention that took place in Jersey.
She got to see where I grew up.
She saw some of the old restaurants my father owned.
And so, you know, we did kind of the whole tour.
But I was working at the Gold Club in Atlanta.
And when I graduated, I thought, you know, I'm going to need to use my degree.
So I went and I became the head nutritionist for a state-funded nursing home in Georgia.
And it was an absolute nightmare.
Oh, my God.
I lasted three weeks and went right back to the gentlemen's club.
And about that time, my former company of about 27 years,
the executives in those days, my boss and his partner were looking for some of the best people they could find
to help them grow the company in Dallas, Texas.
And they found me.
I wasn't necessarily interested at the time,
but there were some legal issues going on at the gold club,
and I knew that that time was coming to an end.
So I gave them a call and I said, hey, if you're still interested, I'd like to come out.
I flew out to Dallas and met with them and literally went to work.
I was there like the following week.
And so I was an executive for the largest, what ended up being the largest adult entertainment management company in the nation.
So I built 27 gentlemen's clubs over 27 years.
Wow.
So did they know about your father's history and that's why they figured you'd be the best person?
Yeah, that's amazing.
Well, they found me at the number one club in the country at the time.
Back when I worked at the Gold Club in Atlanta, we were American Express's largest account in those days.
I think we were doing like $18 million a year at American Express.
Wow.
So when they found me, I was, you know, I was very fortunate.
I found myself a lot of times when it came to a professional perspective in the right place at the right time.
And, you know, throughout the 90s into the mid-2000s, if you were in a gentleman's club in Texas,
there is a really good chance that I either built it, operated it, I had something to do with it.
Wow, your father must have been proud.
You kind of like followed it in his footsteps without even realizing it because it didn't
sound like that's the direction you were going when you went to college, right?
No, not even close.
Yeah, that was not the plan.
I graduated from culinary school about three months after I graduated from college.
But, you know, it's funny because my background, my professional or my formal education really
did help me because anytime we acquired a location and we did restaurants and bars and concept bars
and we were a franchise group i you know i built a number of twin peaks restaurants also over the years
uh did you know ice cream shops and johnny mcgill's restaurants and all kinds of stuff we we owned
franchises so fortunately i had a culinary background so i was the guy who dealt with anything with a kitchen
and so you know i was very fortunate to be put in a situation that i was able to do things that some of the
the other guys simply couldn't do and wouldn't do.
So it allowed me to move very quickly through the company and move up.
And, you know, I did very well.
It was a business that I really did kind of succeed and thrive in.
But I got into fine dining again after I got tired of the club business and I moved back into fine dining.
I was executive for the largest privately held restaurant company in the country and did that for a bit.
And eventually I got tired of the rat race in the big city.
That's when I moved to small town, Montana, I met Brennan.
Right, but is that when you got into swinging, or did the swinging come into play
when you were working in the adult entertainment field?
Yeah.
No, I was not a monogamous pretty much my entire life.
I mean, I was in that environment, you know, I was in an adult entertainment space,
and the idea of anything other than non-monogamy just didn't make sense, right?
I mean, even when I was married.
I'm four times divorced.
Oh, really?
Yeah, one of my ex-wives was an adult film star.
The rest of them were all adult.
entertainers and you know so there was always that level of you know the female bisexuality and
running around so i always had multiple women at the house and it was always that kind of thing and
then i would at one point i became a bull for a couple of different couples over the years and
spent a lot of time in that space and so i was very familiar with uh the world of ethical nonmonogamy
long before brenda and i met but i'd never been in a very specific e-n-m relationship
dynamic prior to myself and Brenna getting together.
Meaning what?
I mean, it sounds like you were never non-monogamous and you were married, so you obviously
had an open marriage with him.
What's with her?
What's the difference with Brenna?
It's more intentional.
It's more thought out.
Like, what's it, you know?
Yeah, there was intentionality.
You know, I think that most of the non-monogamous kind of life that I led was really
one born out of circumstance.
You know, any woman that ever spent any time with me.
back in those days. She knew two things. One, you were my mistress. My job was my wife.
So you always were second. That was simply the way it was. Job first, relationship, second,
maybe even tertiary. It just depends on who the person was. But work was always number one.
You were always going to be number two at best. And the other thing was we were absolutely not going to be
binogamous because I certainly wasn't going to be. It just depends on who the person was.
But work was always number one. You were always going to be number two.
it best. And the other thing was we were absolutely not going to be binogamous because I certainly
wasn't going to be. So that was just something you had to under, you, you understood that going in.
And that's just the life I led. I mean, I, you know, I was not the best person in the world
from a moral perspective in those days. I ran really hard. I was in a situation where I didn't have
to worry about consequences when it came to certain things. I was in such a position in my,
my career and in my company that there was very little I could do to ever lose my job because I
created the position myself. No one else could do what I did. And I was incredibly successful and
very productive. And, you know, I was sought after in the space and I would do contract work and
different things for people. And so I was very fortunate from a professional perspective. And when it
came to relationships, you know, until I met Brennan, we just had this conversation, she and I
today, I really didn't value relationships much until she and I met. And I think that's largely
because I had to make a very significant life change. I had to get out of the situation that I was in
that I created for myself out of that environment, out of the group of people that I was running
with and the world in which I lived for so many years. And I spent almost 30 years in Texas.
And if I didn't get out of there and get out of what I was doing, I was just simply going to continue
doing what I was doing because it was easy.
Right.
And I had to put myself in a difficult situation.
I had to become uncomfortable to really understand who I was and what I needed and to really
appreciate a relationship.
I never appreciated a relationship.
Even when I think back to my marriages, a couple of my ex-wives will tell you that I was
completely indifferent that, you know, they knew that if they didn't come home at night,
it might take me seven seconds to fall asleep instead of six.
I just didn't, you know.
And I really didn't.
I get it.
I'm not about saying that to be good.
Yeah, not even to be funny.
It really was like, like I tell, I say it all the time, 95% of the reason I'm no longer with any of those women was my fault.
I mean, I did the bulk of the damage.
And so because I didn't care and I was callous and I didn't have to be because I always knew instinctively that five minutes down the road, there was going to be another available woman.
And that's just what my life was like.
So the idea that I would, I had never even had the chance to consider not being straight.
It just wasn't something that ever occurred to me because I was so constantly surrounded by available women.
And hot women, right.
It's supply and demand.
Oh, yeah.
So one of the most beautiful women you've ever seen.
So it wasn't, you know, it just wasn't an issue for me.
And I really did take that for granted.
And we, Brennan and I literally just talking about this today on our show, you know, not being able to appreciate someone or appreciate a relationship for so many years, what it did do for me now is.
gives me the ability to be a much, much better partner.
I mean, I'm just a different person.
I'm a different friend than I was in those days.
You know, I just have a different outlook on things.
And I think I have a much more, I have a much better appreciation and a much higher
respect, level of respect for, for relationships and friendships and friendships and people
and, you know, being empathetic and concerned about people's feelings and those kinds of
things.
It was just never, I never cared.
I genuinely never cared before.
Yeah, but I love that because you know what that says to people out there like if you know, because a lot of times your girlfriend will come home and she'll be like, oh, I'm like hook it up with this guy and like maybe word on the street. That guy's a fucking player. He's like the worst guy on the planet. You don't know because like maybe he did change. People can change and they do change. You know and it's all timing and like here you are. Probably a lot of your past girls that you were with would tell anybody if they don't know where you're at now like stay the fuck away from him. But Jenna happens to have a great guy because you're a different person now and that can happen in one person's lifetime. Like you have to.
leave room for that for people, you know, and I love that. And I think that's, that's normal.
You do absolutely as an individual have to make concessions and you do have to make significant changes
because somebody, a lot of people say, oh, you know, I really do want to change. I don't want to be
this way anymore. Well, you've got to make, you've got to take very specific, you know, deliberate
steps to make that happen. So I left all of that to move to a town where I knew no one, no one knew me,
I took a, I took probably a two-thirds paid cut, maybe more, not including the company car and all the, you know, all the perks and all that stuff.
And I just became the, you know, the culinary director for a restaurant in this tiny little town.
That's what I did.
And I had to make myself uncomfortable in order to meet the person I was meant to be with.
And in my opinion, I think to live the life I was supposed to live.
And it wasn't, I was 40, 70 years old and I managed to do that.
Yeah, but who cares?
You could change it at any time.
And you also became the person that you were probably always meant to be too.
Like take away all that noise.
There was just a lot of noise in your life before.
You know,
when people get very distracted by that.
So distracted,
like you said,
that you had just so many hot girls around that you could have never even thought for one second
or you didn't even have like that one second to think like,
could I be attracted to guys?
I mean,
you were around men,
right?
Your girls were hot wiping for you.
You said like,
and you also were like a bull for a couple.
So there was cocks around you.
You cross swords, right?
but never did you even think about it?
Or is there any sign looking back that maybe you were,
if you think about it, looking back?
No, no.
It's funny because one of the things, again,
Brian and I were just talking about,
you know, when it comes to, you know,
obviously we're lifestyle people.
And there are certain things in the lifestyle
that simply don't move me like they do most people.
And that comes from my background.
And it's very difficult for me to explain that to people
because when I say things to people like I'm saying to you,
it sounds contrived.
It sounds insane.
Like when I say to someone, listen, I had four women living in four different apartments on four corners downtown Houston so that I could go from one apartment to another.
Yeah, I had them in four different apartments.
So I knew where they were and I knew where I needed to be.
Like I lived that life.
And so when I say that, people are like, man, get the fuck at her.
I'm like, no, that's legit, you know.
And then when you talk, I hear these guys talk about, oh, yeah, you know, we had a threesome with this gal and this and that.
I'm like, oh, that's cute.
I took two strippers to my senior prom.
So I'm not super impressed by that.
And so, you know, it's like that kind of shit.
And then, oh, my God, some guys probably fucking hate you because they think you're bragging, but it's just your truth, you know, but that's just jealousy because you're not bragging.
It's your truth. Sorry.
No.
And one of the things like you mentioned, like being with other guys like other guys present, there were times.
Like if I didn't know a gal, like if there was an entertainer that I didn't know and she was new to the company and no one had a, I didn't have a reference or there was no one to her.
I would never get, I would never be alone with her.
It was always me and another, like I would grab another manager.
Oh, hey, man, you come with me.
We're going to the VIP room.
And then it would be the two of us and this girl because I didn't know her.
Right.
You know, I wasn't going to take a chance on getting, you know, me being the only one with her.
So I was around dudes in that capacity a lot.
You know, me and my buddies and, you know, my brother and I would have threesomes with girl.
It was like no big deal.
You know, so it was always, you know, that sexuality, that component was always there.
But it just never, it never occurred to me that I would be, that I would even have the ability of
capacity to be anything other than straight, you know? And so that moment when she brought it up to you,
was it like a light bulb moment for you? Or did you have to think about it three days later? Like,
you know, how did it come to be? And like, what were those thoughts in your head about it when you sort of
got in touch with them? Because I wonder, were they always there and she unearthed it, you know,
like or? Yeah. I think it has to be that way, right? I don't think you just wake up one day and you're by.
Yeah, right. Yeah. You know, I think that's a component that you, you possess. And, and at
until someone or until something jars it loose, I think a lot of times you just overlook it.
Now, if you had said that to me 20 years ago, I'd have been like, get the fuck out of here.
What are you talking about?
That would never have occurred to me.
But when she said it to me in that moment, I thought, well, I mean, I guess that's possible.
It certainly didn't hit me like, oh, no way.
That's not me.
I would never do that.
So when I didn't get that gut check kind of feeling, I was like, huh, that's something
to think about, I guess.
I hadn't really given that thought.
You know, and then sure enough, you know, Brenna made me like the first profile I had like on one of the the mail to mail apps, you know.
And she did it for me and put the pictures up and all that stuff.
And she was kind of like manning it for me.
And she got a message from the guy.
She thought I was getting catfish.
There's been like three times in my life that Brenna has thought I was getting catfish because the people were so attracted to these pictures.
So she gets a message from a guy who was legitimately probably the best looking guy in our town.
And she's like, I don't know if this guy's real, but he's interested.
And as it turns out, he was very real.
And he was the first guy actually met and had coffee with and spent time with and had sex with.
And so it was really very cool.
Okay, but wait a second.
Let's like walk through this a little slowly.
So she brings it up to you.
You're like, hmm, you know, it's not a definite no.
So you're like pondering it.
Do you like start watching gay porn or start fantasizing or start thinking about it and getting turned on by it?
Or do you just say, you know what?
I'll just go out with a guy and see how I feel.
and then you're like in the moment you were into it.
Like how did that whole first thing play out?
Yeah, I'm a hip deep kind of guy.
I don't, you know, if I see something or I decided I want to do something, I don't, I don't really think too much about it.
I just do it.
So first of all, I'm not a porn guy.
I don't watch porn.
I have no interest in it at all.
I lived it so I don't need to watch it.
It just didn't, yeah, it just doesn't matter to me.
So when she said that to me, it took me about 30 seconds to go, okay, I need to see, I need to find out this is legit, you know?
And then we talked about it a little bit.
bit she's like well let me put a profile together so she did and then you know a couple of days later
she's sifting through messages and this guy reaches out and he's uh he was a in a medical field and wanted you
wanted to meet for coffee lived very close by and he was partnered and they were in an open relationship
and he was partnered to a man and this is a this was a gay man not a buy man that I had met
and so we corresponded a little bit digitally decided to me for a cup of coffee at a local spot
where Brenna and I would ordinarily have coffee in our town.
Yeah.
And we got along very well and there was definitely an attraction there.
And again, I don't think I would ever have been able to accept it or recognize it until
that point in my life, right?
Because I had been around attractive men my whole life, you know, but it wasn't a situation
where I thought, oh, I would definitely, I'd definitely sleep with this guy.
That never, that never entered my mind.
but I'm sitting here with this guy in particular, we're having coffee, and the conversation is very, you know, it's pretty generic.
It's pretty muted, but he's attractive.
He's clearly attracted to me.
He's making that clear.
And, you know, so then it led to, well, should we get together again sometime?
And yeah, absolutely.
And, you know, I think like maybe three or four days later, I ended up meeting him at his place, his and his partner's place.
And that was my first, you know, male on male, you know, sexual encounter.
And, you know, it was full on from there, you know, it was obvious that for me, I was very comfortable in that situation.
and I found myself, you know, obviously enjoyed it.
And it was great.
I had a great time.
It was a very different feeling for me than the norm, right?
Not just from a, from a biological perspective,
but it was very different being with a man than a woman for the first time.
It was really kind of interesting.
Oh, yeah.
There's so much.
It's so different, right?
So wait, this guy was gay, right?
And you said you went over to him and his partner's house.
Was his partner there watching or did they have an open thing?
And it was just you and he alone?
No, just he and I alone.
Both of them were in the medical field.
They both traveled extensively and the partner wasn't at home.
So it was just he and I.
Okay.
And now, did you know going in whether you're going to be a top or a bottom or a switch or anything like that?
Because it sounds like you just going to go in and not know.
Yeah, that's like how you roll.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, didn't have a clue.
Didn't care.
Didn't know.
As it turned out in this particular case, I was the top.
But it, you know, it could, I mean, it's interesting for men, particularly with me, with men.
Energy transference, like you just mentioned, is very different than.
it is between men and women.
Totally.
With men, we are very much, you know, we're animals.
And you can identify very quickly who the dominant animal is in the room, right?
That's real simple to determine.
Even in a non-sexual way, right?
I know, like, I walk, yeah, oh yeah, I walk into a room.
I don't care what the room is.
I don't care who's in the room.
Yeah.
Especially if there are other, you know, alphas in the room.
I am going to take control.
It does not matter who you are.
I am the guy who's going to end up being in control one way or the other.
Ten of us go in a room, I absolutely come out, no question about it.
So that's how I am.
So in that environment, I was very comfortable being in that role.
Now, that has, over time, changed a little bit.
I have very specific taste in men more so than I do even in women, where depending on a lot of components to a guy,
I will either be a top, potentially, or a bottom.
It just depends on who that person is.
It has a lot to do with age and stature.
And there's a lot that goes into it for me,
especially because I have to allow myself to be submissive.
I'm not by nature.
So I have to let myself do that, right?
Yeah, I get it.
And that takes a very specific person to make that happen.
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stature, and there's a lot that goes
into it for me, especially you could be
I have to allow myself to be submissive. I'm not by nature. So I have to, I have to let myself do that,
right? Yeah, I get it. And that takes a very specific person to make that happen. Now, is that person
like more alpha than you? Or they like, you know, what is that person if you would, are they the
younger person that makes you feel that way? The older person? An older person, someone much like
myself, someone who's fit and takes care of themselves and has a, you know, just a certain
energy about them. I can allow myself to be a switch in that moment, but it has to be very specific
because not from a sexual standpoint, you have to be a certain type of person that I'm willing
to accept that from. Does that make sense? Like I need to be able. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I got to
buy into it. If I can't buy into it, then I'm out. Yeah, I get it. That's the biggest thing.
Yeah, and you're a real alpha. So they have to be really more alpha than you at that moment so that you could then lay back and enjoy yourself. And how is that for you as an alpha? Because I think it's sometimes very hard for an alpha to switch off, right? But how amazing is it to get to that place where you can kind of be a sub. It must be really nice. It's really nice. It's really nice. It's really nice. It's really to be a sub. Yeah, I was going to ask for me. Yeah, it's really nice to be able to do that and not have to be in charge all the time. You know, there really is something to something to that. It doesn't happen very often for me. Yeah, it doesn't. But it doesn't. But it. Yeah, it doesn't. But it. But it.
It is nice to find that when it happens.
Now, have you ever had prostate orgas?
I mean, I'm kind of jumping, but have you ever had a prostate orgasm or experience that?
Yeah.
Honestly, I got a prostate orgasm from a female.
You're kidding.
She with her fingers or like a toy?
Yes.
Yeah, prostate massage.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, with her hand with her fingers.
Yeah, they work, right?
Was it the best orgasm ever?
Oh, yeah.
That's no joke.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
No, I tell guys all the time, if you have not had, you know, that kind of fore.
Rennium stimulation, you really ought to have that conversation with yourself because there's
something to that, you know?
Well, that's why I talk so much about guy-on-guy action or even like, you know, forget about
guy-on-guy action, just anal sex when it comes to guys, even if a woman is like fucking him in
the ass or pegging him or I want to stick my finger up a guy's ass when I'm blowing him.
Like, it's like, no, I'm not gay.
And it's like so ridiculous.
Even that has such a stigma.
It's kind of crazy.
Like I get it if you're not gay or you're not interested in a guy doing it.
but what's the difference if like a girl is doing it?
You know what I mean?
It doesn't, why does that have anything to do with you being with a guy and they're still
closed off?
And my mission in life is to get every guy to try a little anal action, whether it's with a guy
or a girl because it feels fucking great.
I'm a three input girl I know.
It's strictly a psychological thing.
And really, it's a social thing.
These guys do not want to, you know, I really believe that a lot of guys will have
difficulty looking themselves into me or looking at their friends after having had that
experience because they're something.
something innate about. It's like it's so weird to me. You know, like somehow they lose masculinity
points if they if they succumb to such an activity. And it's like, man, it's kind of like the
hot wife space. I think I've mentioned this on the show the last time we were on. There's nothing
stronger in my opinion. When a man is open and accepting to his partner being satiated by
someone else only to have the partner come back and share that energy transference and that
experience with him and have him reclaim that energy. That takes a very, very strong person
who accepts that. Yeah. This is very much the same thing. So it's always, it's so counterintuitive to
me when people say, oh, you know, that's gay or whatever. Okay. Well, then call me whatever you want,
but I'm here to tell you until you've done it. You really can't, you know, you can't knock it,
you know. Yeah, no, I did a whole poll on Patreon the other day and I said like, you know,
do you think like a man is like if an alpha guy hoax up with a guy do you see him as any less alpha
you know just because I was talking to a girl named Brooke she's like a big hot wife girl and
she's got this husband named Blaze and I've seen him he's a fucking alpha dude just like you you know
what I mean you could tell an alpha guy even over the phone right and this guy hooks up with guys
and at first she was nervous she did not know she had that that thing she was told by society
that if I see my guy fuck another guy he's going to be less of a man and she was like
Like actually the opposite happened.
She did it.
She allowed herself to go down.
And when she saw it, she was like, he was more of a fucking man.
You know what I mean?
And that's the truth.
And I had, you know, it was funny because I don't understand this whole stigma.
I feel like whether you're by or even gay men get it even worse, you know, that like being
gay is so bad.
Like even by guys or guys that suck dick, they'll be like, yeah, I suck dick, but I'm not gay.
It's like, and why is that bad?
Like, even if you were gay, like, why is that such a terrible thing?
It's so rude even for that person to say.
And I'm just like, I don't understand why they.
These people have, like they need like a publicist.
They need the trans gender publicists for them.
Because for some reason, this is the last group of people that still have a huge stigma
attached to them for what fucking reason.
And you know, I had these guys on there called the Maverick Men.
Now, you don't watch porn so you're not going to know about them, but they're hot as shit.
They're two like gay men who happen to be in love and have the most loveliest relationship,
been together since the dawn of time, just got married.
But they fuck other people and they became big porn stores doing it, okay?
And I've had them on my show more than once and they're fast.
And you know what they said to me? And I was like, oh my God, that's so fucking right. He said, like, really,
if you think about it, this whole stigma against like, it's misogyny, right? Because, like,
what are you saying if you're less than a man? You're saying you're a woman, right? And that's like,
it's like, it's like, women are less than. And that's the fucking problem. And that's where it's
from. And I'm like, oh, my God, you're totally right. You know, it's like, how can a man be less than
a man? You're still a man. Doesn't matter if you have a dick in your mouth, a, a, you know, a pretzel in
your mouth. Like, you're still a fucking man. It doesn't make any sense. And you're still a man if you date.
man.
Well, it's interesting.
Yeah.
You know, because people will say that kind of stuff, right?
Well, they'll say that digitally to me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know, I've never had anyone say that to my things.
Never.
Right.
Not one time.
You know, we were, so Brennan and I were at a resort, this is a couple years back.
I went to the bar to get her a drink.
She was in the pool.
And I'm standing at the bar, big square bar.
And there's two guys standing there, they're having a conversation.
They're about six feet away from me.
It's just me, them, and the bartender.
And the bartender's making their drinks.
And then one guy is telling this other guy the story of what happened the night before that he and his wife were with this couple.
And the male portion of the couple that they were with was by.
He didn't know it.
And he got super uncomfortable by it.
And he told him to get out.
And he said something to the effect of, you know, I'm not gay.
I'm not with that kind of thing.
And he was, you know, the guy that he was talking to, of course, is agreeing with this whole thing.
Like, oh, yeah, I would have done the same thing kind of deal.
And I'm standing there.
I'm just looking at this.
And they realize, of course,
that I'm listening to this conversation.
And the guy looks over to me.
He's like, am I right?
He's like, you would have done the same thing.
And I said, well, first of all,
I wouldn't have been anywhere fucking near you.
And I'm not straight.
So no.
No, I wouldn't have done the same fucking thing.
Right.
And he just looked at me,
he got his drink and walked away.
I didn't say it worked.
So it's like, clearly, according to Brenna,
I don't give off bi vibes.
I don't know what that.
I don't know how to do that.
But, you know,
I think people have a skewed view of what a bi man is,
I guess for a non-straight man.
Or a gay man.
I mean, it doesn't matter what it is.
They just think that they're like a certain way.
And that's why I love when I ask the question on my Patreon.
And, you know, more than half of the people will still think that that guy is less than a guy because he, less of a guy.
You know where I thought your story was going with the two guys at the bar was that you were going to tell me that two days later, you know, you met them at like, you know, in the hotel room and you were blowing one of them.
Because the truth is, let me tell you that, like, in the Swinger world, and this is what blows my mind.
And this is what I really wanted to talk about a lot on this episode, too, is like in, even in that world, right?
In the lifestyle where everyone is so fucking open-minded and cool.
And, you know, like, there's still a huge stigma for guy-and-guy action inside that world.
And I've talked to club owners and people that run things and they're all like, we all know there's buy guys in.
We know who they are.
But like, no one's talking about it.
No one's doing it.
It's mostly not accepted.
I mean, I think it's changing now.
But how crazy is that?
And you obviously see it all over.
right? We do. And I got to tell you, I don't see it changing that much. I know a lot of people
say that. I can tell you from my perspective, I don't see a lot of forward progress in that space.
And let me say this. When you talk about the lifestyle, again, Brett and I just had this conversation
a couple of weeks ago on the show. We were talking about judgment. That was part of the conversation.
Yeah. When you say like the lifestyle, like you just said, right, it's very accepting. Yeah.
It's open and inviting. The truth of the matter is, it's the most judgmental space in the world.
Really? Oh my God. Oh.
Oh, but oh no, we just, well, think about it.
Yeah.
It's entirely the basis of it is that theoretically, you and a stranger or, you know, a supposed
stranger anyway, you and someone you are not partnered with are potentially going to have sex.
The first thing that people do when they walk into a club environment, a resort, up the board,
lifestyle party, whatever, you're instantly judging who it is in the room you find the most attractive.
Okay.
is the first thing you do, right?
So if someone approaches you and you're not attracted to them,
you are instantly judging that person.
Instantly, and listen, we all know it, right?
Women are terrible at it when it comes to what other women are wearing, right?
Guys don't necessarily do that, but we'll judge guys for different reasons.
You know, I'm going to judge a guy based on his demeanor on how he carries himself on.
Now, I will judge a guy on what he's wearing because I'm a stickler about that.
If you've got cheap shoes and your belt doesn't match,
and if you haven't clipped your fingernails and you're, you know, that kind of thing,
I look at that kind of stuff.
But we are constantly judging people.
And one of the things that is very harsh criticism in the lifestyle is that by or non-straight
male in the room.
That is still a problem for people.
And, you know, I don't understand it.
I don't get it.
Listen, Brennan and I are dealing with it right now from the content creator perspective
with some people not wanting to create content or being concerned about creating content
with some guys that are referred.
refer to as crossover where they're going to do both male straight and gay porn.
And it's like, what is the difference?
What do you care if this guy also does gay porn as well as straight?
Like, why is that a thing?
Because what you're basically doing is your, you're casting aspersions at me as well.
Because I'm not straight.
And, you know, I've been with men.
So are you suggesting that I'm less than also because I am not a straight male?
And you somehow categorize straight men is, you know, there's a hierarchy and you put them above.
non-straight men somehow like I really don't I don't I don't buy it and that's a big part of the
lifestyle it really is it's very very strange but I wonder because you're so out and proud and
you know you have a microphone right so it's out there and you're also still in the swing of
world and you go to party so obviously the people there know that you are by do you get treated
differently now or do they still respect you and nobody fucking cares does anyone come up to
you and like oh by the way me too like I mean how have you experienced it since people know
No one has ever been negative to me.
I've only ever received positive, you know, messages from people.
And it's like, oh, man.
And a lot of times what's really nice is I'll have guys come up to me privately.
Like, hey, it's really because of you that I've been able to come out to my wife.
And I'm not straight.
And, you know, I've got a lot of it digitally as well.
But as I referenced earlier, no one has ever walked up to me at an event.
No male has ever walked up to me and said, hey, I was really interested in you playing with my wife.
But you're not straight and I'm not about.
Like no one has ever done that. I've never received any kind of negative feedback from anyone for not being straight. Now, that does not mean that people in the room didn't have a problem with it. They just simply did not voice it to me. And I just don't care. You know, so part of it is I don't give a shit what you think about me. I am entirely too old to care. And so if you, you know, someone thinks they're going to hurt my feelings by going, oh, you know, you're soft. I mean, we get it all the time from the hot wife space, right? Oh, you're a, um, you're a.
and you know, you can't satisfy your wife.
Okay, cool.
If that's what you think, you know, of course, you're saying that to me from a thousand
miles away on a computer.
You're never, ever in a million years going to say that to me directly.
So I don't take you seriously.
But, you know, that's just kind of the way it is.
And that's a, to me, the guys that behave that way, they're the least straight guys in
the room.
Yeah, of course.
They just haven't come to terms with it yet.
Yeah.
You know, that's kind of a, you know, you're just projecting as far as I'm concerned.
Listen, I talk to people.
and because I provide anonymity on my show,
I can't tell you how many guys I have on my show.
And it's really unfortunate that the stigma exists
because there are so many guys
that are doing stuff behind their partner's back
because of it.
You know what I mean?
Any woman could tell her guy she wants to like fuck a girl
and her guy's going to be like,
oh my God, that's so great telling his guy friends at the bar.
You know, that's like a badge of honor.
But no man could come home and tell his wife
like he wants to go do that.
It's still a big thing, right?
So, but they're doing it, okay?
They're fucking doing it.
And they're doing it a lot.
There's just as many guys that are into guys as girls into girls.
I remember in my day and I'm sure you remember it when the whole girl on girl thing became
okay.
Because it was stigmatized when we were younger, right?
It was like around the 80s, late 80s where it became cool, right?
Jenna Jameson, porn.
It was like all of a sudden and every girl's like, oh my God, I have a girl crush, right?
Every fucking vanilla girl's like, I made out with a girl.
Nobody would have said that two years prior before it was a thing.
It was stigmatized too, right?
But then when that stigma went away, every girl's like into girls.
But it's still, so it's like it's the same thing for men.
You think men don't, there's not as many men out there that are like a kind of buy on the
fucking spectrum somewhere.
It's the same amount.
They just can't raise their hand and say it because there's still as bullshit stigma.
I tell women all the time.
I said it on the show.
I've said it many times.
If any woman doesn't believe that her man could potentially not be straight.
Yeah.
All you need do is get on one of these mail-for-mail apps.
Exactly.
Listen, I've been on all of them.
I no longer have any on my phone because it gets so overwhelming.
I can't afford it.
But if I had a dollar for every time I was contacted by someone on one of those apps with no profile picture and no bio,
wanting, you know, car play, let's meet in a dark place and, you know, no faces, no names, don't.
listen, you are all closeted dudes.
You're all married.
So all of these women who don't think that their husband could possibly be non-straight, they're
kidding themselves.
Any woman who believes that need only get on one of those apps and see exactly how many
of those guys there are.
Because these are, you know, guys who are legitimately out and open and single or in a
relationship like mine where you are, you know, capable of being who you are because
your partner, you know, accepts respects and celebrates you.
those guys are not hiding.
I don't have to hide my face.
I'm not looking to get blown in my car
in the parking lot behind a grocery store.
I get that shit all the time.
So I'm an adult.
I'm not doing that.
I don't have sex in my car.
I'm not in high school anymore.
So the idea that these guys are doing that
tells me that they are closeted
and they are hiding
and their partners don't know
because if their partners did know,
they wouldn't have to do what they're doing.
Yeah, and that's what's so terrible about it.
It is.
It's horrible.
That's what's terrible about the stigma because it just creates, like the domino effect of it and, you know, how like the ramifications, you know, all the men that are doing it and how many women find out, you know, eventually some women find out. And like, you know, the marriages break up because of shit like this. It's like a terrible thing. And I just don't get it, you know. And I think it's amazing, though, that you were with Brenna who not only accepted it, but she kind of like brought it up and helped you figure it out somehow. Like how.
crazy was that moment for you that she kind of picked up on it. And does she ever take part in your
experiences with guys and watch? Or is it something that you do separately? Like, how does it go down?
So we have only been in a couple of situations where she has been in the presence of myself
and another man. But those, like, for example, when we first got to Vegas, our first
Vegas lifestyle experience, right? I tell this story often because it's so fucking bizarre.
that most people can't wrap their heads around.
It's the kind of thing that it's like it'll ruin lifestyle experiences for you for the rest of your life
because you're going to constantly chase this experience.
Yeah, I got it.
So without going into the entirety of it, it was insane.
We got picked up in a Phantom Rolls Royce taken to this high-rise 12,000 square foot condo above the city.
And it was a by party.
So it was by men, buy women, by couples, okay?
And all attractive.
Like everyone in the room was attractive.
And so Brent had the opportunity to see there was like two guys and a gal that were servicing me at one point.
And, you know, it was this kind of whole fucking Roman orgy thing going on, you know.
And then Brennan and I were with a couple, they're friends of ours that we met here also.
And they're by, the gentleman's also by.
And she saw he and I together while we were all four of us together.
So she's been in the presence of that for sure.
But the majority of our play has been solo.
So a lot of what, you know, our play is, you know, she's playing with somebody, I'm playing with somebody, and then we come back and kind of reconnect afterwards.
So other than just a couple of different experiences where it's kind of a group thing, she has not necessarily been present.
Now, she and I have been, like, I've been with another guy and Brenna, like one of her play partners and myself, like for her birthday, we brought him out to a place that we used to go to in Montana all the time and the three of us would play.
And we did that a few times.
but that's really, that's the extent of it for the most part.
So typically you play solo?
Yes.
And is it just when like the urge comes by comes on to you or like, I mean, is it rare?
Is it like once a month?
No.
You know, it's different now.
We literally are going through, you know, we go through phases because we are, we're
people that constantly seek kind of new experiences, you know.
And for me, I'm taking a step back from lifestyle activity and really kind of focusing on
Brenna's play and us really enjoying the hot wife component, right, where she goes out and plays
with a single male, she comes back to me, and then we reconnect over it. The problem I have in the
lifestyles that I am so far the other direction from most people where, you know, most guys, for example,
can partner or not, can walk into a lifestyle environment and they don't really care. It's
indiscriminate whether they're super attracted to somebody or know someone or have a connection.
It doesn't matter. They're just looking to get off. I'm not that guy.
And for me, there has to be a lot more to it.
I need to genuinely connect with someone.
I like the chemistry.
I like a conversation.
If you're not someone that I can see myself kind of sitting down and having a
cup of coffee with, I'm probably not going to get naked with you.
And that's a difficult thing to do in a lot of lifestyle environments, right?
The time component simply isn't there.
And so for me, just the indiscriminate sex doesn't matter to me anymore.
And honestly, it's more trouble than it's worth.
I find myself overwhelmed by the attention.
and I'm flattered by it.
Believe me, I get a lot of it, and I'm very flattered by it.
But we just did our big event in our Podbash event at Secrets this past September.
And I had a lot of attention from a lot of the folks that were there
and a lot of the gals that showed me attention and wanted it had interest
and would tell Brenna that they were interested.
And it gets to a point where it's like, I'm just, it's so much for me
that I just completely retract and don't want to do anything.
So I really do enjoy Brenna's.
play more than mine.
So I'm really kind of taking a step back from it.
As it pertains to men specifically, I have been, I've had such crazy encounters with men.
Really?
Digitally.
Oh, yeah.
Digitally particularly.
Men are horrible.
They're incredibly bad.
Especially the guys that are closeted and, you know, hiding.
And it's, it's brutal.
Why?
What goes down?
Tell me.
Oh, it's, well, because, see, here's the thing.
If you're going to hide your face.
and you're going to be on a computer.
And this is going to be like your indiscriminate little,
you know,
this is your dirty little secret.
These guys will say things to you.
It's just mind-numbing.
Like they come up with the craziest shit
and expect you to be okay with it
because they assume that everyone is like them.
And it's like, dude,
I'm not hiding.
I'm a real person.
I have a partner who understands me
and knows that I'm not straight
and understands that I'm here
potentially meeting other men.
So I don't have to do this weird clandestine.
and bullshit. And that's what most of it is here. So for me, I rarely interact with guys who are not
straight up gay and out of the closet because otherwise it's just a waste of my time, you know.
So that's really my preference when it comes to men, like gay men who are very comfortable in
their own skin and not hiding and, you know, not in the closet and not with a partner who doesn't
know and, you know, all that kind of stuff. So that that's really more, you know, my thing when it
comes to men, but that's what I look for.
Well, you probably then don't really go after younger guys, because I feel like there's a
lot of young.
Yeah.
And listen, if you were fishing in that pond and you were open to that, you'd find a lot more
by guys.
Oh, I could kill it.
Yeah.
But you'd like them more because they'd be more like the open gay guys, because these
younger guys are much more out and proud.
I have a son.
He's eight years old.
Every Disney movie we go to and we see.
And every TV show we watch on Netflix with high school kids, they're all by, they're
all gay.
They're all hooking up with everyone.
The girls are with the girls.
The guys are with the guys.
I mean, it's a totally different world.
Thank God, right?
I think it's amazing.
So you obviously are hooking up with 25-year-olds because, you know, 30-year-olds.
The younger guys are more out and proud, and you wouldn't get that kind of nonsense.
It's the people in our age group that are living the lies still because they have been their whole life.
It is.
But the problem is I cannot wrap my head around the idea of engaging sexually with a 22-year-old.
I'm telling you.
I get, I would have guys reach out to me 19, 20 years old on these apps.
It's like, oh, sir.
Like, no, no, no.
You know, you got a daddy thing or whatever.
I can't get into that.
I'm not, I'm not the guy for that.
And no sooner would I hang out with a 20 year old girl.
So let's get that stream, right?
So I'm not going to, you know, do, you know, be with a 21 year old person for any, any reason.
You know what I'm saying?
It's just too weird for me.
And the same with guys.
Like, you want to meet them first, right?
You want to talk to them.
Yes.
You need to know that you can have a conversation.
like that first guy, he was a doctor, you guys like had coffee.
I mean, that's the way you roll with all these guys that you hook up with, correct?
It's never like that quick thing.
No, more so with men even than with women because with guys, it's, you know, again, the energy
is different, right?
And if I'm going to spend some time with a guy, like, I got to be able to, I got to like you,
like genuinely want to have a conversation with you, you know, sex is easy.
We can all do it.
We're biologically designed to do it as humans.
It's not complicated.
It's the before and after that gets complicated.
And if we can get that ironed out, well, then the sex is easy.
You know, there's nothing to it.
Okay, well, what about your first blowjob?
Did you swallow?
Did you know what the fuck you were doing?
Where you're like, wow, I'm doing this great because, like, you're a guy.
Like, I wonder.
I had enough of them to kind of have an idea what I was doing.
Yeah, yeah, that's what I mean.
I wonder.
Yeah.
But no, so the first, let me think the first, well, so the first time I was quite comfortable, actually.
And no, I did not swallow, but very comfortable.
In fact, I enjoy providing oral for men and women pretty much equally.
I'm a pretty oral guy.
So for me, it's really not, you know, it was not so far outside of my wheelhouse.
Let's put it that way.
You're a pleaser.
You like to please.
I 100% have you.
I'm an acts of service person.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's the other guys that really into oral.
So, and you're that way with men and women.
Yes, absolutely.
Yeah.
And again, I have no problem playing that switch, that versed role.
Yeah.
Even someone for whom I am potentially topping, that's not an issue.
And that's a component to, you know, male on male play a lot of times, right?
Because everybody wants to be satiated.
So that's not an issue.
But it just comes down to whether or not someone is going to, I'm going to be the one doing the penetrating or not.
That has a lot to do with who the person is and what that connection looks like.
Yeah.
Two last questions.
One, do you kiss guys?
Oh, yeah, for sure.
Yeah.
Listen, kissing for me, that's the big thing, right?
And that's, well, that's the other part, like my connection with women, it's no different.
Yeah.
If I kiss someone and there's nothing there, we're all done here.
Like this is, it's a wrap.
You know what I mean?
Like, we're all finished here.
Yeah.
So, yeah, absolutely.
If I don't find myself interested in kissing you, I'm certainly not fucking.
Yeah, I get it.
And then my other question was like that first experience that you did have with a man, it is, like,
did it feel like you were losing your virginity?
Was it like this mind-blowing thing?
Was it just like another sexual experience?
Like, what was that?
first experience like for you? Because it's
kind of major that after a guy
like you who's been there done that lived
out all of the fantasies that most
guys would never be able to, you know, here you
are now having a first
after being so experienced. Yeah, what
was it like? It was oddly
comfortable and very
kind of seamless, but you know, that has a lot
to do with the person too. And, you know, this is
a gay man who was very comfortable
in his own skin. Also, I mean,
when I tell you, the guy was super fucking attractive,
like I said, Brennan thought I was getting cat.
Yeah, yeah, that's great.
You know, that made life so much easier, obviously.
Yeah.
And, you know, super fit and just everything about the guy was great.
And, you know, he was just a whole situation was comfortable.
So it was afterwards when I left and I was on my way home, I think it was going to be
pretern for dinner or something.
Yeah.
And it was really this kind of like almost euphoric, like a weight had been lifted.
Like I was able to actually identify something in myself that I had not identified for the first
47 years of my life.
So not so much like losing.
your virginity, but like gaining something about yourself that had not been present before,
unearthing something, you know?
Yeah, coming into your own, being more in touch with who you are, not something new,
sort of like something that's always been there and finally saying hi to it.
Like it's finally, you're no, finally coming to one with it.
I'm just going to edit that.
I don't know what the fuck I'm saying.
Yeah, becoming one with the whole concept.
Becoming one with it.
Yeah.
I mean, I think that that's pretty profound.
Well, yeah, I mean, you know, listen, there's a lot.
I think we know there are a lot of guys that struggle with the idea that their partner,
they've been with their wives, you know, since high school and they've got 2.5 kids.
And, you know, now they're in their 40s or their 50s.
And the idea of coming out to their partner at this stage of their lives is frightening.
And I tell them, as I say it to them all the time, you know, this is a situation where you can't unring the bell, right?
The round doesn't go back in the chamber.
If you tell your partner, you do have to understand that only a few things are going to happen.
either your partner is going to be 100% on board.
That's the best possible case scenario.
Or she's going to go crazy and be completely disdain to the whole concept, just resistant to it,
in which case you're now going to live a life of your partner, always looking at you like
potentially you're cheating on her, looking at you as less than potentially.
And you're always going to have that thought in the back of your mind, like, is she going to trust me?
Does she believe me?
you know and it's like you once you ring that bell man you've got to make a decision a conscious
decision to live with the consequences and it's not easy for guys to do it that's a shitty place to be
you know living your life yeah i mean that that's tough and we've heard some horror stories from
guys that have that are lived that way and they're just miserable you know but don't know what to do
they're in a bad spot you know don't want to ruin the kids lives and and all that you know brute
the marriage and all that it's yeah it's difficult there's no question about i don't
envy guys in that situation. Yeah, because like you said, the, the fact that you might have to actually
leave your wife, you know, after you tell her, because she gets, is a real fucking thing that could
happen. And that's like a real major thing. So it's like, it is a really catch 22. Like, what does
that guy do who's 55, who's never said it, you know, does he come out and say it so he could
stop living a double life? Because that is exhausting. Yeah, but not just your family. Right.
now you've got to deal with, not just your wife and the kids, you got to deal with the rest of the family.
You've got potentially your job you're going to have to deal with.
If there is a pending divorce, this information is going to become public, right?
She's going to be running around town telling everybody it's irreconcilable differences.
We have to get to divorce because he's not straight.
It's this whole thing.
So, you know, your whole world becomes disrupted, right?
I mean, that's a, that's a diff.
And it's a shitty place to be, right?
That's a shitty decision for a guy to have to make.
Like, either I have to live this lie or I have to start.
the consequences of being honest about my sexuality. What a shitty place to be. Yeah, no, and it's terrible.
And that's why, and that's why I love, like, having these conversations. That's why I love
better wellness as my sponsor, because I'm always like trying to get guys into guy and guy
action. Oh, man, what a great product, right? Thank God for butter wellness. Yeah. And also, like,
you know, and I love having all these guys call into my show and talk about it because I think that none of this
would exist if the stigma would just go away. And it's about fucking time and more people have to be
out and proud. I love that. You're out.
I'm proud because I think your voice helps, right?
Every guy that could fucking cop to it only helps that, okay?
Like, stop hiding.
Maybe you're never going to tell your wife, but like, I don't know, just like,
be more out.
I love, like, I think, you know, 20 years from now it's going to be a different world.
My son's not going to have to worry about these kind of things, you know?
And I think it's great.
Not at all.
Yeah.
So I think it's good and it's changing.
And it's sad for the guys that are still in the closet.
I have them on my show.
I'm going to get emails from them now, you know?
I think it's inspiring, though, for guys like you to come on who are.
We're really effing alpha here to say, this is who I am, and I also do this, right?
Those two things can exist at the same time.
Like, why can't people figure that out?
Why can't they accept it?
The problem is guys believe that their sexuality defines them.
Yeah.
And that is just simply not.
The case, you can be a lot of things.
We're complex preachers.
Yeah, I love that.
I don't have, you know, you can't, there's no way you could put me in a fucking box.
There ain't a box big enough.
I'm all over the place.
So, you know, like, it's not, you know, and I'm not just, I don't even consider myself by.
I use that term, but I'm more panned than anything.
I've dated transgendered women.
Yeah.
I've had, you know, I've had all of these experiences.
And so opening yourself up to the idea that maybe you're, you know, you're not just straight.
There's, again, there's no harm in that.
And the stigma around it, as we were talking about earlier in the lifestyle, especially of all fucking places where supposedly you're able to be your sexual self, right?
And there's this total acceptance.
What a crock of shit, right?
Yeah, yeah.
If that's the case, then we wouldn't be talking about this.
Yeah, no, I know.
Yeah, it's terrible.
There's some work to be done in these supposed accepting spaces, you know.
But yeah, I agree with you.
If more people would just have that conversation.
And honestly, I'm going to say this, those gals who are partnered, have a conversation
with your partner or your partner, your male partner.
Hey, do you ever think about it?
Are you, you know, did you have been sick?
Yeah, like that you're not strained?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Open it up.
I mean, because the guy, 99 times out of 100, a guy that's not saying anything is because
he's scared to death to tell his partner.
Of course.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, that's what it is.
It would be nice if that were, you know, there were more women like Brenna out there
who would identify that and go, hey, dude, you just might not be straight.
Just thinking about that.
You know, just kind of just throwing it out there.
Right.
And let that person know that if the answer is, oh, you're right, that it's going to be
accepted, right?
And not asking in a judgmental way.
You must have a lot of guys that, like, you know,
don't like you. You must get some hate. I don't know because you're so confident, right? You just state the
fucking facts. You know who the fuck you are and you're living your best life. And you've also
cop to the fact that you hook up with guys and you fuck them and you're like out and proud. And so many
people must project their own like hidden secret lives and insecurities about themselves on to you. I'm
sure. Absolutely. You know? Oh yeah. I get a lot of it. But at the same time. It's jealousy. It's
Absolutely. It's envy.
Yeah.
But I also get a lot of guys that will reach out and they will come up to Brennan and Hyatt events
and thank me and, you know, I was super appreciative of everything you said.
You really have helped me.
And so if anybody that reaches out to you that wants to contact me, obviously feel
pretty a pat on my contact.
If I'm happy to talk to anybody.
Yeah.
And that's what I respect and that's what I love that you do because you have a microphone.
And I think it's great that you use it to promote that and that you're open about that
and you don't keep it secret, especially in your lifestyle world and that you, you know,
you own it and I think that that is more helpful for the people, like you said, that email you.
And I will get emails and I will put them in touch with you.
No, please.
Listen, I'm happy to help.
It's a, you know, it's a situation where the more conversation, the better, you know.
It can't hurt the space at all.
I think more conversation needs to be had.
I think more guys honestly need to step forward and be like, hey, this is who I am.
This is what I'm about.
There's no shame in this.
And, you know, we're here to help kind of thing.
there just aren't enough guys out there at least not enough guys like me i don't think that are willing to do that
and you know while britton and i have a lot of friends male friends that are not straight who are alpha dudes who are
you know there's a lot of us we're a big fucking group you know and um there's there's strength
and numbers guys don't need to be concerned about that shit anymore they really don't yeah i love it
thanks so much for calling in and discussing this with me because i think it's a very important thing to talk about
and put out and every time you talk about it or I talk about it, it only helps the other people.
Yeah, no, I appreciate you taking the time. It's really important. And I think we, you know,
like I said, we need to have more of these conversations. Thank you, Brian. Thanks so much for calling
back in. I love this conversation. Thanks, Kathy. We'll talk soon. Okay, bye. Bye-bye.
Okay, I just want to tell you before you go that my book, it's called Strictly anonymous
Confession, Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, is now available not only in paper,
back an e-book, but you can pre-order the audio book. It's still not going to be out until August
25th, but you can pre-order it. The book is basically 17 different stories taken from my show.
I kind of picked one story from each category that I talk about on my show. Like, there's a
hot wife story. There's a cuck queen story. There's a cuck story. There's a gang being girl story.
Like I said, 17 stories. And they're all told in the third person. And they're all told in the third person.
they're all true. I took the interview and rewrote it in the third person. And I wouldn't really call it
like a total erotica book. Think like penthouse letters. It's more direct. It's not so over the top like
erotica. I don't really like that kind of vibe, right? But these are true stories. 17 of them.
They're really short chapters, easy read. You could read, you know, one or two and then skip around.
You could read the whole book. It's available in eback format, paperback format.
and finally the audio book is available coming out August 25th, but you could pre-order it now.
And if you buy my book in any format or pre-order it, I will throw in a complimentary link to my
Discord. My Discord does not disappoint, okay? There's no way you get into my Discord any other way
than getting the link from me, okay? I give it to people who buy my book. There's tons of people in there.
Everybody shares content with each other, and that's what you get to do there. You could post your own
pictures and videos. There's tons of channels. We have lots of contests where you can win a lot of money.
It's a super fun place to be. It's a total strictly anonymous community and you will love it.
I will be giving anyone who buys my book access to my Discord. It's private, like I said.
All you got to do is email me a screenshot of your purchase, whether you did the audiobook, the ebook,
the ebook or the paperback. Send it to me at strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly
Anonymous Podcast at gmail.com and I will send you the link to Discord. So anyway, thanks so much for
tuning in. This is the Strictly Anonymous podcast. Good news. Strictly Anonymous Podcast is looking for people
to call into the show. So if you lead an interesting, naughty secret life that you want to talk about
while remaining anonymous or not anonymous, if you're out and proud, that's cool too.
me an email, strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com. That's strictly anonymous podcast at gmail.com.
Or go to my website, strictly anonymous podcast.com and click on, be on the show. If you have a short
confession that you want to get off your back, call my confessions hotline. 347, 4203579. That's 347,
4-203579. You could call that number 24-7. I change all the voices on the confessions too. So you remain
Anonymous, the number, the website, and the email address will all be in the description.
If you want to follow the show, follow me at Strict Anonymous on either Instagram or Twitter.
That's at Strict Anonymous.
And if you want to sign up for my Patreon, you're not only supporting my show, but you're
going to get all of these episodes early and ad free.
You're going to get anonymous picks of all of my guests.
Most of the girls send me in anonymous hot picks of themselves.
And some of the guys are sending me in anonymous picks.
as well. You also get access to my private Discord where people are getting super naughty.
If you sign up for my Discord, you could post whatever you want and talk to my other listeners.
To sign up for my Patreon, just go to patreon.com slash strictly anonymous podcast.
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Thanks so much for listening.
