Stuff Island - Boys Trip - Stuff Island #235

Episode Date: May 20, 2026

Nick Murphy joins the boys this week Comedians Chris and Tommy Pope are making all kinds of Stuff on the paytch. Each week they talk about anything & everything under the sun. Tommy also chefs up ...some delicious meals. It's a blast, folks. Check out our second channel @LookatDish where Tommy Pope and Chris O'Connor cook elaborate meals with your favorite comedians SUB TO THE PATREON: PATREON.COM/STUFFISLAND Download the app now and sign up with code STUFFISLAND. Claim your FIVE HUNDRED FLEX SPINS and choose your slots! The Crown is Yours. In partnership with DraftKings Casino. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling call 888-789-7777 or visit CCPG.org Please playresponsibly. Twenty-one plus. Physically present in Connecticut, Michigan, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia only. Void in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. Non-withdrawable Spins issued as fifty spins per day for ten days, valid for select games only and expire each day after 24 hours. See terms at casino.draftkings.com/promos Ends May Third at eleven fifty-nine P M Eastern time. Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/knz4su0l #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Cash App Green, overdraft coverage, borrow, cash back offers and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. Right now, when you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for FREE with promo code STUFFISLAND. That’s promo code STUFFISLAND. Visit BlueChew.com for more details and important safety information, and we thank BlueChew for sponsoring the podcast. ake Cheers Restore after your last drink or before going to bed and wake up feeling at least 50% better — or your money back. For a limited time our listeners are getting 20% off their entire order at CheersHealth.com/STUFFISLAND #Cheers #ad Follow Chris on IG: https://www.instagram.com/achrisoconnor Follow Tommy on IG: https://www.instagram.com/tommyjpope #comedy #comedypodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:01 Yeah, what happened? One of the all-timers. One of the all-time days. It was, dude. Boy's trip. I've never had... How far did you go? It was more of a boys walk.
Starting point is 00:00:14 It wasn't really... It was very quick. It was so succinct. The process was unbelievably fast. I got a text from Tommy and he goes, you got shows tonight? Might need your help. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:00:25 I sent it out to three boys. I said, Chris? Yeah. You and Butterly. Nice. And I was like, these are three guys that probably... of cables and no more than I do about a vehicle. What did you say? What did you
Starting point is 00:00:37 text him back? He goes I have my car's fucked up. I was like well he goes he goes It reminded I'm out. It was also He was a dead inside couldn't possibly No no no
Starting point is 00:00:49 This is what happened Also I had just I had just finished like working out And so I'm like my brain's like all foggy And Tommy calls he's like my battery's dead I got to fucking take my car Can you help and I was like oh yeah my car's fucked
Starting point is 00:01:03 that's what I know let me call Nick Tommy can you help me yeah can you go over here I meant to call you yeah keep your dick sucked
Starting point is 00:01:13 to get this dead out of this no I went to central market and my girl and I have this like competitive nature she's so fucking good at central market
Starting point is 00:01:25 Central market has like little departments obviously like any place she knows a layout she knows where to go she knows the shortcuts So she'll break down her list when I go, right, for just us solo.
Starting point is 00:01:38 Solo mission. She's a-dra-you-map. She's an Army Ranger. They turn into the Terminator in the grocery store, man. She don't map it out, but she'll put all the ingredients based on your entry point, what ingredients to get and your whip around and what ingredients are on that list. So she'll block it out. And then after you go to like the wine and celtzers, cut through the cheese aisle, get the soy milk. leave your cart
Starting point is 00:02:02 she gives me detail this is seal team six they need to do they need to do zero dark 30 but it's all limited zero dark 30 but it's a grocery store it's all female
Starting point is 00:02:15 I was clear in every fucking angle I was clear in every fucking angle I had like 15 things to get you know I'm going through the butcher I gotta get steaks and chicken I'm gonna fucking I'm bopping and I'm a cart full of all the wrong stuff you gotta blow it up
Starting point is 00:02:30 get out, get out, get out, get out, get out. I just blow my brains out. I'm breaking records and I'm so excited. I parked by the gap because I was already locked in, right? So by Central Market, there's all pregnant women. Everything's going.
Starting point is 00:02:46 And women are like fucking ants at like 3 p.m. During the week, they all come out of a fucking hole. And they're, you know, they're playing with their kids and I'm on a mission. Yeah. Get your fat belly horror out of, my face. I got to get the steaks and the arugula, the soy milk, and almonds.
Starting point is 00:03:06 What time are you going? I went up like... It was like 3.34 o'clock. Yeah, I mean, that's, yeah. Yeah, it's close. I mean, because that's when they go, dad's coming home. Dinner's got to be ready by 536. That was on me. It's an army of pregnant. Right, but just like
Starting point is 00:03:22 you, I was just getting back from the gym. I had a fog in my skull. And I said, let's sit around for an hour. I do nothing. I fucked up. The fog. Park in front of the. Gap. Yeah. Another bunch of Prego horse are bopping in Gap.
Starting point is 00:03:34 So I walk like, I don't know, 50 yards. Yeah. To the central market. In and out. Dude, I'm breaking time. I can't wait. Everything's going too well. Too well.
Starting point is 00:03:45 Yes. I get in my truck and it just... The clicks. And then it went... Yeah. You know that... Yeah. I know immediately.
Starting point is 00:03:54 It's the only thing I know outside of a flat tire and empty gas tank. Yeah. I know when your battery guys... These aren't the headlux. Yeah. First thing I checked, I was like, I leave the headlights. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:07 Then I was like, oh, fuck, so I called an Uber. I didn't want these groceries to go bad. So I took an Uber, and the Uber guy shows up, and I asked him, I was like, there's no cables? Yeah. I was going to a shot, you got cables on you, right? Amazing. Huh?
Starting point is 00:04:21 He's Arab or something. And I was like, he's like, how are you doing? And I was like, my truck, the battery's dead. You don't have cables, dude? and he's like, ah. And he just turned back, waiting for me to just like put my C-Pone. He wasn't even understanding.
Starting point is 00:04:36 He's like, HDMI? What do you mean? What type of iPhone do you have? You tried to play Xbox and back of car? He probably thought you just said pretty good. Yeah. No,
Starting point is 00:04:47 100%. I was sweating my dick off. You got cables? Oh, very good. Beautiful weather. Beautiful day today. dude, I was like, where the truck was at the gap, the car is kept his conversation tree doesn't go beyond that.
Starting point is 00:05:08 It's like the grocery list. Yes or no? If he says yes, go this way. Sir, do you have any cables? Oh, me too. Me too. If he says me too, call friends. So I waited there for a bit.
Starting point is 00:05:26 Calling an Uber to ask for kids. Cables is amazing. Well, there's a chance. Yeah, you got to guess. There's a chance. But I got comfort. I should have, I probably should have got like Excel, you know,
Starting point is 00:05:38 got an XL and maybe they got, they got cables. Excel boys got cables. You're paying for the scratch, you know? So I just waited. And all these ladies are going left and right because the way I was parked, I obviously don't reverse in because I'm going to fucking dickbag, holding up traffic.
Starting point is 00:05:54 Yeah. To say, what, 30 seconds? Get the fuck out of here. I'm going to pull it. in. So now my bumper is on the curb and then the glass of gap is right in front of me. So I waited for a bit
Starting point is 00:06:05 to see these cars, the cars in between me, sorry, on the outskirts of me, to see if one guy pulls up and he's got a truck or something. Yeah. I'm waiting for a man. I got 40 fucking librarian. Oh, that's great. In a row and I was like, I got to get out of here. I'm sweating my dick off.
Starting point is 00:06:21 Right. They probably have cables. Lesbians have cables. They do, but they're very nervous. Yeah, yeah. And I'm This is like, I know the sun's up, but it's still fucking creepy. You're not the right diplomat for a lesbian. Just getting their attention, they run away. My cologne is like soaking
Starting point is 00:06:37 into my flower shirt. No one's trusted. If there was a lesbian nation, you would not be the ambassador. Oh, dude, for sure. If I saw a bull bike, I want to jump, I want to jump on our back and choked her out. They sent Domney to the meetings like, these brosso put out for nothing, me.
Starting point is 00:06:52 Can't give them to do anything. I've been here for 35 minutes. Don't bust. Dude, they yap back. It's insane. So I get home, I send the fucking calls out. Nikki says I can get there like 40 or whatever. I called my boys at Flamingo Automotive.
Starting point is 00:07:13 Yeah, I trust in love. Shout out to Flamingo Automotive, dude. Shout out. Promo code Stuff Island. Get a free car at Flamingo Automotive. Suck out the dent of your car. No, they were great. They were like, you can't get it here by six.
Starting point is 00:07:29 It's going to close. Just drop it off. Don't block the street. And we'll try and get it to you tomorrow. And then he shows up. And there's two cars to the sides of me. We have the same. Oh, this was the funniest part.
Starting point is 00:07:42 Because then we just, there was nowhere to go. There's cars on both sides of you. Yeah. And because you didn't back in, it's just the curb. So I can't get up there. Yeah. So we had to wait. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:54 We went and parked. Hold on. Hold on. On on. You got out. We scout it. And he reversed into his scouting position. I always back in.
Starting point is 00:08:03 The way I should have done. I always back in. Sorry for insulting you back there then. We'll talk about that later. Yeah, yeah. No, but you got to have eyes on the situation. We got eyes.
Starting point is 00:08:10 That one you had to, but I always back in anyway, but yeah, that one you had to. I brought two ciders because I knew there was going to be a fucking, you know, we're going to be bird dog. Yeah, yeah. It felt like we were waiting to see his wife was cheating on him. That's what I felt like we were doing. It was undercover. It felt like an undercover thing.
Starting point is 00:08:25 But we're only like 20 feet away from the car. It's the wire. Yeah. And you don't know. But we're just waiting for a pregnant woman to move for a car. You don't know if she's stocking up her fridge at the central market or if she's popping in the gap looking for. If it had gone a little bit longer, Tommy would have started grabbing a, hey, hey, is one of these yours? Please.
Starting point is 00:08:49 Dude, I'm not kidding you. We bet as soon as he puts it in park, car comes out, I go, oh. It's like that meme with DeCaprio was like, we got a hit. We got a hit immediately due to his 30 seconds. And he's like, he's like struggling to get the car into the spot. You kind of called it because you said the central market's pretty quick in and out anyway. Yeah, but I was worried about the gap area. No, no, you're right, you're right.
Starting point is 00:09:11 You know? Yeah, the shopping area. Who knows? Who knows what these pregnant bitches are popping around doing? And sure enough, right in there, gets the cables locked on. What about when they got in the car? Did they sit? No.
Starting point is 00:09:24 No, no, no. They went right out. She was all business. Yeah, yeah. Dude. That's nice. Before I start this process, I want to say I was sitting on the couch between the 45 minutes that Nick came to pick me up and just despondent and angry. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:40 And she's like, it's fine. Because you're thinking this is the rest of my day. Yeah. You could have been in an accident. The car could have got fucked up like yours. Yeah. There's nothing wrong. You know it's the battery, right?
Starting point is 00:09:49 I'm like, I think it's a battery. But I'm thinking about the next three to four hours of my life going to down the drain. with anger and frustration. It was the complete opposite of that. We didn't finish our beer. Yeah. So we cracked a beer. We had three sips.
Starting point is 00:10:06 He charges it up. We drop at Flamingo another four minutes from Central Market, no traffic, back road. Drop it in. The guys at Flamingo are still on set. It's still on set. Well, on site. I'm used to acting.
Starting point is 00:10:20 They're watching tires when you show. Oh my God, you're here. They were so cordial, gave paperwork within like three minutes. Dude, I was home. I had this much of my beer gone. That's, it was. I want to say we were under like 25 minutes total probably. Total.
Starting point is 00:10:39 You know what's so funny? Door, he picked me up and then dropped me up. Yeah. Yeah. Flamingo. And I told you this. The first text, when you said, you have spots tonight because we've been talking about this for forever.
Starting point is 00:10:49 Well, no. I thought this is, you're finally want to go do my open, mics with me. That's, that was what I thought. And then you're like, I might need your help. And I was like, oh, man. Nope. No way. Tommy's trying to do spots. Yeah. Of course. Nope. My battery's dead. I need your track. I need your cables, actually. I need you to cancel your open mic. No, I still made it to all my shows. It was very, everything went quick. It was great. Flawless victory. Yeah, I thought so. That's one in a million. That fucking rocks. I've just, I've had that happened so many times that I'm used to
Starting point is 00:11:24 you know I always got the cables in the back yeah so just in case I gotta get some of those I've had to juice other people yours went surprisingly quick too it was just the one I just turned on my truck and then yours fired up sometimes it's still you need more you gotta do extra shit really but even that yeah what I hate is that BMWs don't have both bolts terminals yes so you gotta put one on the battery and then one just on the car also the battery
Starting point is 00:11:51 It's hilarious. Yeah, yeah. You got to clamp it to somewhere else on the engine. My getting warmer! It's insane. Yeah, yeah. It's insane. Yeah, it's insane.
Starting point is 00:12:00 Yeah, I haven't hung out with an Indian in years. Indians love. That's not true. You weren't you just in the car with one? Oh. No, he was Arab. Oh, okay. Sand Indian.
Starting point is 00:12:10 Yeah, yeah. Well, I think that passes. That's a good experience. I had a bad, I had a bad bar experience. I had one of the most... Bar? Bar? Yes.
Starting point is 00:12:21 I went to fucking what's it called I was in South South Austin it was a cool it was a cool looking bar but I go in Kellies
Starting point is 00:12:31 no it was we just guess for 15 minutes It's a place we go to No it wasn't Kelly It wasn't Kelly's it was something else God I wish I could remember the fucking name Because I fucking hate these fucking bartenders Well let's not plug them
Starting point is 00:12:45 No no Let's leave it out into the Not plugging them I almost want to McGilla who gives a shit their way but yeah i go we go in there it's we went to i went to the mac de marco concert on saturday night i we go into this bar afterwards there's like four or five of us and uh i go to the counter we're trying to order beers the bartenders are doing the thing that i cannot
Starting point is 00:13:09 fucking stand which is they're looking at the they're looking at like glasses they're looking at ice they're like refuse to look up and make eye contact you and it was it It was not, it was crowded, but it wasn't busy. Yeah. Everyone, like, had their drinks. There was, it was literally maybe only me and one other person trying to order. That's a problem. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:31 So, this is a total breakdown when there's only a few people. No, no, it was packed. Oh. But, like, everyone had gotten. But he's saying everyone was already served. Yeah. It wasn't. They weren't still getting slammed.
Starting point is 00:13:42 One guy starts cleaning a cup. The other guy starts helping clean the cup. The other guy goes against his cables to put on the cup. me juice you back up. So I'm losing my mind. That's pretty funny. Right? Two guys cleaning one cup?
Starting point is 00:13:56 Dude, dude, it was... Just to avoid him. Dude, it's two gay guys. We'll be right with you, sir. He's just smoke coming out of his ears. Oh my God. He's holding it so they can... I'm so mad.
Starting point is 00:14:11 The guy finally comes over, right? And at this point, I had put my, like, girl in charge of getting stuff because you know, I was clearly maybe they don't like my vibe. Yeah. They get drinks faster. Yes.
Starting point is 00:14:25 The guy comes over to her and now we take, we got to order like five drinks, right? The guy's like, what do you want? She's like, could I get a Bud Light, a McLeob Ultra, a fucking, and like list of throw and a margarita. And she's not done. And the guy just walks away.
Starting point is 00:14:43 He just bales. Yeah. And starts getting it. The other guy comes over and is like, what do you guys need? So then we like finish the order. Yeah, yeah, we finish it. We get the other two.
Starting point is 00:14:54 You split the order. And then the guy, the other guy starts walking back with the other beers and he's like, oh, was he helping you? Why would you fucking? Oh, he started giving you shit? Yeah, and now I'm like,
Starting point is 00:15:05 he's starting green. That motherfucker just walked away. And then I'm literally like, I'm doing the thing where I'm loudly saying, like, these guys are the two biggest fucking shit I've ever met in my life. One guy's got a fucking, cool hat on and like big thick glasses.
Starting point is 00:15:20 Now we're just going all ad hom and him going right at his parents. I was, irate. Yeah. And then, then, then, then, we drank the first round. I see her over it. Dude, this is unbelievable. It's like this happened 10 minutes ago. Dude, this is unbelievable. This is 14 years ago.
Starting point is 00:15:41 My wife left me afterwards. My dog died. My son's 14. I walk in. My son's helping him clean the cup. What the fuck's going on? Dude.
Starting point is 00:15:55 Then this, this sent me. So we finished the candles. This guy's getting fired up. Finish the first round of beers, right? I go back in. I get two more bud lights. I walk out.
Starting point is 00:16:09 There's like a separate thing where there's a bar and then there's like a burger place behind it. That's like also kind of part of the bar but not really. Yeah. So I, we walk down to the burger place
Starting point is 00:16:19 with these Bud lights and the guy outside the burger place goes you can't come in here with those right? We're literally 15 feet from the entrance of the bar and he's like you can't come here
Starting point is 00:16:33 with those so I go all right I walk back up to go back into the bar and the bouncer goes where'd you get that beer you just saw me walk out with it and he was like can't bring that in here
Starting point is 00:16:46 now they're fucking you. Dude, I was like, that's why you don't say those words as loud as you did. Yeah, it's because you made
Starting point is 00:16:52 fun of his hat. I mean, that's why. Fuck that place. But you should have doubled down. He's like, where'd you get those beers?
Starting point is 00:16:58 What'd you get that hat? Yeah, no, no, well, this was a separate guy. This was a black guy. I don't know. Okay. I didn't want to get involved.
Starting point is 00:17:04 Yeah, let's talk about that. Tommy wants to talk about the black guy. You didn't mention a black guy, Chris. Yeah. Dude, I've done that so many times
Starting point is 00:17:13 like you can't, you can't order with a beer in your hand, I just slam it. I burp through my order. Yeah. Dude. Get another fucking beer. Oh, like when you, it looks like you've already been served.
Starting point is 00:17:24 You can't order another thing. Yeah, if I walk in with this, like, sir, you can't order a burger 15 feet from the bar you just came out of. Yeah, yeah. That we have a combination of contract. Right. So, dude, literally. Or the reason you're here is for drunk fucking retards to fall down the steps and feed their pigs.
Starting point is 00:17:37 Right. I'm going to just smoke my beer in fronty and go give me my burger. Smash the glass on the ground. Yeah. I'll have a number two. Yeah. Also. I get it's like it's a legality issue where it's probably they don't have a liquor license.
Starting point is 00:17:49 They can't be on premises with beer or some bullshit like that. There's a patio. We were drinking beers on the patio next to the bouncer. I was next to the bouncer. Yeah, you fired them up, dude. You fired them up. I think you give them too much credit. I think it's a whole bar full of retarded people.
Starting point is 00:18:09 Yeah. That's what I think. Well, to your point also, if you're going to put them in that kind of proximity, yeah, people are going to walk to the fucking thing. That's the whole point. Yeah. That's how they make their money. You've got a pack of wolves next to your chicken.
Starting point is 00:18:21 You're going to be missing some chickens. You can't be like, hey, buddy, my buddy, you can't bring that chicken in there. You can't do that. Drops the chicken. You're going to put your beer on the ground. Another wolf's going to come by. Grab your fucking beer. Yeah, another guy goes behind finishes your beer.
Starting point is 00:18:36 I'm with five wolves. I can't put my beard out. Yeah, man. They mess with you with that shit. There's a bar I like. It's right next to East Austin's right across the street. It's one of the only ones there. I like their policy on this.
Starting point is 00:18:47 Mama dearest? No, it's La Jolla. Jolla. I know that's a thing out and whatever. East Austin Comedy Club? It's right across the street. Mama dearest. Oh, the one in the corner. Yes. To go margaritas. La Jolla or something? I can't remember. But they let you buy a beer as long as you don't open it and you can leave.
Starting point is 00:19:06 Yeah. And you can take it to the talent. Well, I like that. Yeah. That you can leave and they just trust that you're not going to be a retard. They put a little piece of tape over the top just like an airport. They don't even tape it. They just give it to you.
Starting point is 00:19:16 Yeah. And they're like, oh, you're going to the comedy show? Yeah. Just don't punch it. Yeah. Just don't punch it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:22 I've never heard of that. I love it. That's like a New Orleans vibe. That's like every flight I've ever been on in Austin. They let you. If I fly American, I can't fly to, if American direct to Philly,
Starting point is 00:19:33 there's no Delta. Yeah. They get ripped in the lounge. Yeah. Yeah. You go right to some bar. You'll get me a double fucking whiskey. And cap it up.
Starting point is 00:19:41 So if you're already in the lounge, they let you do that? Because they make that announcement the flight every time. If you're already in the lounge, I'm getting soaked. No, I know. I'm talking about bringing it on to the plane.
Starting point is 00:19:50 I'm talking about on the plane. That sounds like a jackoff massage, man. I'm getting sucked, man. I'm getting absolutely soaked. I get my fill if I'm in the lounge. I'm talking about bringing it on to the plane. It's what it sounds like you're saying. No, they don't care.
Starting point is 00:20:03 It looks like this. All right. Whiskey on rocks. I've had to hit them with an apple juice. This episode is brought to you by Cheers. Health. This is going to be good. You're going to like this.
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Starting point is 00:23:08 Product. Need more product. It's crazy. We figured that out. Yeah. Take a tablet and now you're hard. Yeah, it's huge. A bunch of horny scientists.
Starting point is 00:23:17 Yeah. Working their asses off. It's so wild. Their dicks off. Yeah. Just sitting around with your boys going, you feel anything yet? It's like taking ecstasy.
Starting point is 00:23:28 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just waiting around. They got delayed fuse. Yeah, who's getting creepy first? Wolf of Wall Street, but they just get hard. I believe in the good scientists over at Blue Chew. I believe they're upstanding citizens. But they've asked you?
Starting point is 00:23:42 Whiskey in a cup. I feel like this is starting to be. You problem. I feel like you're getting a lot of You get a lot of stop at the green light type of shit. Chris, we're glad we got you here today. We wanted to talk to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:52 It makes sense. It makes sense. You can go on through a lot, but me and Tommy wanted to talk to you, make sure all the fans know you have a problem. I get it. It makes sense. A lot of people just going,
Starting point is 00:24:03 yeah. Let's give this guy one once over. Just act normal. Yeah. I'm acting, I was acting totally normal. I'm just walking onto the flight. And they go, what's in that?
Starting point is 00:24:11 It's from my child. It's diabetic. What? My child. She's no kid around me. No, my wife and child go on first. And I'm a good man. You just point to a random woman and kid.
Starting point is 00:24:22 And I wait for my... And I wait and I drink. Yeah. Yeah. Apple juice. Well, her hands were full. Her hands full. I stay behind and I drink apples.
Starting point is 00:24:31 I drink apple juice until I can't walk properly. I'm the diet. It's just in a wheelchair. Oh, that's good. You're that sauce. You're getting home before the military. They're having to push you on some kid. I served at the Irish pub four years ago.
Starting point is 00:24:57 God damn. No, there's so many rules around just consumption, you know, bars in different states. It doesn't make any fucking sense. PA was like that growing up. Yeah. Where it's like, you could go to a. bar get blacked out and get six packs to go but you couldn't go liquor and beer different places there's beer stores what are your what are the open container laws in PA there's a no no
Starting point is 00:25:24 yeah Savannah Georgia take it with you yeah you pour in a cup take it with you I still do it no I know no I know but I'm just saying the law you know the rules yeah right yeah you got to be a complete Neanderthal and side swipe cars like Christmas yeah yeah you get pulled over even here in Texas yeah Yeah, man. Yeah. But I got hit. Well, I was drinking an N.A. beer on the street once and a civilian tried to get me in trouble.
Starting point is 00:25:47 That's just fucking insane. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's insane. You can just punch that guy in the face. Yes. I think you're legally allowed to do that. It was crazy. Wait, what state is this?
Starting point is 00:25:57 For N.A.? Pennsylvania. No, no, no, no. No, it was a civilian just went, you cannot drink on the street. Oh, my God. It's like it's an N. And they didn't. And then what do you say to that?
Starting point is 00:26:07 It looks like a real beer. And then they walked away. Yes. the point. I'm trying to psych myself out. What the fuck are you doing? This is the warm-up round. Yeah. Gotta get the body ready. Yeah. Also, you empty out at any
Starting point is 00:26:19 beer, put in fucking mezcal. Yeah, you do whatever you want. Yeah, it's also like, I didn't do, I didn't do this to trick you. Yeah. You know what I mean? What age are we talking? It's like a 50-year-old lady. Oh, of course. Yeah. White lady? Yeah. It was a Christmas day. It was Christmas parade.
Starting point is 00:26:34 Oh, God. And they said that to me. The Grinch came, man. Yeah, that's crazy. Man, this looks like a beer. Much how this looks like a beer. gun. Get a fucking way for me. It's got orange on the top. They look like bullets that come out of it. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:47 Just painting a real gun and just put an orange like orange finger paint in the top and then blowing her fucking head off. Yeah, nobody does that way. Everybody spray paints the fake ones. Nobody spray paints a real one. Just get an orange silencer.
Starting point is 00:27:01 Yeah. Your bullets look like the nerf, the little Nerf stick things, but it's like a hollow point. Damn. Yeah, she just needs to be fucked. It doesn't matter what age. Even 60, you can knock the dust off.
Starting point is 00:27:18 She just goes, you know what? Let the kids drink. Yeah, she'll come back and crack a beer for you. She just get plowed one time, man. You get blown out. Yeah, you blow out Karen. Every day's Christmas for at least three, six, five. That's true.
Starting point is 00:27:31 I think that's the solution to the Karen's, man. They're just not getting late. They're not getting late. You shouldn't care about zoning, who's having a barbecue on the street corner. But she's also never gotten rocked by a black lady in the streets. Dude, that's one of my favorite videos. It's a good video game. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:47 You're a Karen. You got to avoid all the black ladies. You got to avoid everything. Everything can set you off. You got like a, yeah. You still have a Grand Theft Auto meter of how mad you are about just anything. Right, but the meter can't go too high or else you lose. You got to keep your cool.
Starting point is 00:28:07 It starts to get the red. Black kids jump ropeing. It's like two stars. They should be in school. Somebody opens a fire hydrant. It's a lot of waste of water. It's such a funny. If you're a parent,
Starting point is 00:28:19 the goal of the game is just to have a nice day. Get back to your barbecue with no friends. You could just stay inside and you win the game. You win the game if you just don't go outside. You'd think, you'd think, but you got to get groceries.
Starting point is 00:28:38 Yeah. It's the first challenge. That's the first challenge. You've got to get gas and your battery dies. I kind of go back through a seedy neighborhood. Whose fault is this? Not mine. I got to get my triple A card.
Starting point is 00:28:53 I got to go back through South Philly. You got to just get piped by your husband finding out. That's so funny. That's all I got to do is just relax, man. Yeah. Yeah. Just calm. fuck down.
Starting point is 00:29:08 Like that series. Yeah. Getting ripped on the street. It's the best. Especially doing like corny parades in small towns. Yeah. You know? Yes.
Starting point is 00:29:18 That's what those are for. Yeah. You know? I still go back. My buddy still lives in the neighborhood we grew up and he bought, he went back and bought a house there. And I'll go back every once in a while. We go to the pool. It's time of drinking fuck around, man.
Starting point is 00:29:30 Of course. I don't care what your rules are. I grew up here. I'll do whatever the fuck I want. Yeah. Yeah. As soon as I did. They have potlucks.
Starting point is 00:29:37 They have. I think you can actually booze a little bit at the pool now. It didn't used to be back in the day. But that's what it's for. Yeah. Get a little blitz to have a good time. Yeah. Drinking on a beach.
Starting point is 00:29:46 Drinking on the beach is great. You drop those chairs before you even pull them out. Umbrella, toss it. Yep. Crack that cooler, get one in you. Yep. You got to shake your feet down to like the lower towards the water so they don't burn. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Stare at your first piece of ass. Cairns don't think like this. Yeah, no. Because they've never been hit. Never been rock. Rocked. Yeah. Just fucking rocked.
Starting point is 00:30:10 Well, I think most women haven't. Bill Birdy should have a bit about that. He's like, you ever see a woman fall? They never, they don't know how to brace themselves. Dude, I've just said that all the time.
Starting point is 00:30:19 Yeah. It's the funniest thing in the world. It's like one of those. It's like a scared goat. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:25 Yeah. It's like the America's funny song videos when you see like a middle-aged woman fall. That gets me. I almost throw up laughing. It is most of a boy's childhood is like, is practicing falling. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:37 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Avoiding damage, prexy. Yeah,
Starting point is 00:30:41 getting socked in your face. Yeah. Yeah. And the women, they just... All right, don't say that again. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:47 And just jumping from couch to couch, jump it, like you're just avoiding sharp edges all the time. Get on the roof? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:53 Yeah. Yeah. They go to ACMI for cheese plates and key lime pie and then fight the, the poor kid about his price.
Starting point is 00:31:02 Exactly. It's like, this is her jumping couch to couch. That's their talent. Going from Wawa to Acme. couch to couch pitching about prices for food that no one's going to eat.
Starting point is 00:31:12 Right. Their altercations are all verbal with cashiers. Yes. You know. But then they get the wrong cashier. Then they get the wrong. Then they go to Waffle House. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:21 And they're jumping over the counter. Yeah. The final boss of the cashiers. They'll take you out, man. Waffle House videos, dude, they have such a great reputation now. Yeah. Of they will just beat the shit out of you. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:32 I mean, it is such a scary group. What, Waffle House? Yeah, working at Waffle House. Oh, I love it. Yeah, but that's part of the... Dude, you just play ball. Yeah, yeah. Just play ball.
Starting point is 00:31:42 No, no, I know. You're not going to complain about your hash browns at 4 o'clock in the morning. I mean, that's your fault. A hundred percent. It's crazy to complain. You go make hash browns at 4 o'clock in the morning for $8 an hour. Yeah. That's kind of be part of...
Starting point is 00:31:56 You can get an absolute mountain of food for like eight bucks. Yes. Then you leave a mountain in your toilet. That was a joke I used to do. I like the shit where I eat. That's why I go to waffle. Yeah. That's got to be part of like the application process and the interview process at Waffle House.
Starting point is 00:32:12 It's like, you know what I mean? What have you been through? Yeah. How many fights you've been in? Yeah. You have scars in your face? Let me see your hands. Listen, we're starting you on the midnight shift.
Starting point is 00:32:22 So these are going to be important questions. It's like sets for comics. It's like you're not there yet. You're not Saturday at 9. You're going Sunday at 640. You survive? Then we'll move you up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:36 Walking into that place. to get a job with like a full set of teeth. It's like, what did you go to Harvard? Yeah, right. What happened? Why look at Hollywood. It's crazy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:51 I know you're an actor too. So beautiful. But I'm telling you, you play ball, your family by the end of the meal. Yeah. Your waitress is calling you baby. Yeah. You know? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:02 Your family, if you just play ball, man. That's it. Eat what they serve you. Yeah. You know? Street charisma. will get anything from a fat-tidit black lady. Yes, man.
Starting point is 00:33:11 You're getting extra everything. Extra everything. Yeah. But if you don't play ball, you're getting extra something else. You're getting smothered and covered. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Love Waffle House, man.
Starting point is 00:33:25 You guys have them out here, right? I just haven't been the one yet. I don't know. Well, of course, they're everywhere in Atlanta. Yeah. It's good. They're everywhere where we're from. I don't think, I've never seen a Waffle House here.
Starting point is 00:33:37 Waffle House and PA? Yeah. I thought you were talking about Austin. Once you go, once you go up to Turnpike, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, a little west. Yeah. Go towards like Allentown, Bethlehem, Harrisburg. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, the western, PA kind of thing.
Starting point is 00:33:56 Yeah. You go either northwest or south-southwest. See you. Yeah. They don't need them down here. You know? What are they have instead? What here?
Starting point is 00:34:06 Yeah. For late. night fast food? Well, you have food trucks and stuff, so it's different. Maybe you don't need his Walthall House as much. There's no sitting... I feel like an IHop, Denny's. I hop, I guess.
Starting point is 00:34:16 Oh, they have that Culver's. Colvers is down here. Okay. Which is kind of like a Denny's. Is it? Yeah. Is that the one with the burger? Some kind of butter burger?
Starting point is 00:34:27 I don't know. Apparently they got some good stuff. I haven't been there yet, but I've heard some good things. Let us know in the comments. Let us know promo codes. Yeah. I heard like the... chicken nuggets are great.
Starting point is 00:34:39 Yeah. I'm hungry. Yeah, yeah. Did you eat? I'd lunch. What'd you have? Chipotle. That's pretty good. I go on like right next to my apartment.
Starting point is 00:34:51 Yeah. I go there all the time. I always get a bowl, man. Yeah. Yeah. Those are my steroids that you think I'm on. Do you get steak? Chicken.
Starting point is 00:34:57 You're chicken bowl? Yeah. Double it up. Yeah. Double chicken. Yeah. Do you do the, the chico where you get a side of tortilla and make a second meal? Oh.
Starting point is 00:35:07 Or you just crushed it? Oh, no, I just crushed the whole thing. Yeah. You're big boy. Yeah, man. Do you get chips? No. Not every time, sometimes.
Starting point is 00:35:14 Yeah. But it's extra. They just told me to download. Here's how much I go there. They just, the employees have, they know, telling me to get the app for rewards points. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:26 They're like, dude. Yeah. Get a free bowl once in a while, man. You're really wasting a lot of money here. Let us help you. You know? How many times you're doing Chipotle a week? Dude, I go there.
Starting point is 00:35:37 like honestly almost every day really yeah man the same meal every day look at me no you look great look at me Tommy you think I'm on steroids you look great that's the secret yeah Chipotle bulking up Chipotle and planet fitness
Starting point is 00:35:49 body body body body body body body but but there's a ceiling right like I'm not gonna look like Arnold Schwarzenegger yeah I get a little bulk you know once you hit 40 you're gonna look like a pale blueberry I'm gonna look like a tortilla yeah look like a burrito
Starting point is 00:36:05 oh speaking of Karen shit. This happened like two days ago. I'm eating there and this lady's having a Karen out. She's freaking out. My back is too She's in a K-hole. She's in a K-Hole.
Starting point is 00:36:22 Yeah, man. Coin that. Coin that. O'Connor, K-Holes. Yeah. She's in a big one. This is like, this is shouting when there's a full restaurant, K-Hole. She's shouting. You don't laugh at somebody like.
Starting point is 00:36:37 that. Why would you, what kind of a person are you? I mean, full volume. Yeah. I'm not looking, so I don't know what's going on. But eventually, you know, between bites, you're like, I wonder what this is all about, you know? Yeah. You do one of those. But I can't see what it was. I must have missed the interaction. She's yelling
Starting point is 00:36:53 at an employee. I saw you. Don't try to hide back there. I saw you laughing. And I'm like, are they laughing at her? What is going on? And I just go back to eating. And next thing I know, she's at the Soda found, getting her stuff. And I hear her talking to somebody. And I look over and there's a little person right next to her also at the soda found.
Starting point is 00:37:13 And she goes, I just want you to know, I don't normally do stuff like that. So you're welcome. And the guy kind of goes, yeah, thanks. Like he wasn't expecting that or something. But honestly, dude, seeing it, it was a little person, something kind of funny must have happened. I don't know what happened. Wait, she was, was she yelling at the little guy? No, she's yelling at an employee.
Starting point is 00:37:35 I'm putting together that. the employee must have laughed at something that happened to the little person. And I don't know what that is, but it had to be a little funny. I mean, it's a little guy, man. Did she fill up his soda? How do you get up there? Exactly. That's what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:37:55 Just looking at the two of them saying next to each other already looked funny, you know? Dude. And he didn't seem that thankful. Like it must not have been that egregious, you know? That's like an insane move. be like that would be like the biggest like for her that's like the worst bully move you could possibly do to to a little person is to go like I did you a favor kind of thing and also just to be that loud about I know dude like imagine now you're drawing more attention yes imagine if anyone
Starting point is 00:38:26 with a disability is next to you and you went to a whole room and you let's see to start to him you think this is a joke you think this little funny looking fucking guy He's worth laughing at it. I'm telling you, man, something a little funny. Something a little funny must have happened. I got your back, bud. Dude, they work at Chipotle 10 hours a day. They're not allowed to smirk when something a little unusual happens.
Starting point is 00:38:52 You know, any idea? What his tiny little life is like. This is number two in the video game. The person with a disability in line, don't say anything. Just say nothing. Just don't do anything. Dude. This person is different.
Starting point is 00:39:10 He just came over. He jumps on to a toilet. His waist is like Grand Theft daughter. You just die. This poor man shit's like a rabbit. Do you think he wants this? He has to get on a lap. She has to get on the toilet.
Starting point is 00:39:26 I don't usually do this. What do you want? What do you want? What do you want, Dr. Pepper? That line at the end bothered me too. He has to put a doggy door. just get in his own house for her to go
Starting point is 00:39:40 you disgust you're to force a thank you I didn't like that either crazy you're welcome it's like shut up man I didn't ask you to do any of that you know dude there was a pack
Starting point is 00:39:50 can little men hit women is that is that allowed yeah yeah when does it become an equal yeah do they get into the same weight class yeah
Starting point is 00:40:01 some of them don't Can we do any fan? I'm boiling in here. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to the fans. We can cut this. No pun intended. I sold your water.
Starting point is 00:40:14 Are there more ciders? We can cut this part. I can buy some next time. You got to bring a 12 or over next time, Tommy? Hit medium on that boy? I'm like, I'm melting in my seat. I'm sorry. No, it's all good.
Starting point is 00:40:32 I'm sorry, I let you guys down. It was too warm in here when we started. I will say that. It is hot today. So maybe just it's just, I dropped the temp. Did we bust all the, all the blood orange out of the,
Starting point is 00:40:44 out of the gate? I don't want to take yours. You got to restock. Is that your apple juice? That is nice. The stair down? I'll take it. Let's split it.
Starting point is 00:41:00 Okay. Last one. Yeah. This is me and Tommy in the Delta lounge. Before we go, get on a plane. There's no split in Delta. Yeah.
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Starting point is 00:44:27 You got time. You got plenty of time. Go hit it. Get on draft kings and hit the spin. And now back to the episode. Are you a Delta Lounge guy? Yeah. Yeah, I think I'm going to get the purple card.
Starting point is 00:44:39 Oh, you got it. Yeah, I think I'm going to do that. I've started traveling enough. It's a wonderful. I know. Yeah. It does. Everyone's telling me,
Starting point is 00:44:45 you got to get the purple card. I'm up to like 750,000 miles and I use them a lot. Yeah. Is it all, is it just flights or is it just expenditures? I can't keep track now. They used to do both. I can't get out of silver.
Starting point is 00:44:56 I'm in the mud still and I don't get it. I use it for everything. Yeah. And I shouldn't. I got to start separating my cards for business and pleasure. And then flights, obviously, you book all through the Delta card.
Starting point is 00:45:09 Yeah. And you get a point for every dollar you spend. But you got to set it up with Uber and stuff like that. Because all these companies are trying to just turn into banks, they realize that their actual business is not that great. Yeah. So they just want to be a bank. It's a nice...
Starting point is 00:45:25 It's a nice... It's a nice perk. Is Chipotle doing that to me? That's what's happening with my rewards. I'm close to a free bowl, fellas. They probably won't you get a Chipotle credit card. Oh, that's funny. At some point.
Starting point is 00:45:37 Yeah. Yeah. They get one... You should get other points. They're like buying toilet paper and like a plunger and shit like I'm at Walmart. They're like, sir, you get free guac. What? No, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:45:51 At another place. Dude, there was a pack of midgies on the red carpet for the rose. Yeah, let's get back to the midgies, dude. Holy Christ. There was one. Wait, were those the one that came out with Lizzo? Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:03 Yeah, there was like three or four girls. Okay. But one was just wearing a thong and she had a fucking dump. Her dump was on. Well, that must have done something for you. And then she was running back and forth on purpose to get all the black dudes riled up. Yeah, yeah. Because it was a shake and bake, dude.
Starting point is 00:46:17 It's fucking absolute waterbed. Oh, my God, man. It's crazy. Let's plug this lady. Let's shout her out. That was her name, plug. She's the plug. A little plug.
Starting point is 00:46:27 A little plug. It was plug this lady. What did you think of that article I sent you about your porn star, by the way? I was upset with how she looks. Yeah. She got arrested. She stabbed a guy, I think, her boyfriend or something. I have to pull the article back up.
Starting point is 00:46:45 I think she had a toothpick at her mouth. Yeah, she stabbed a guy with a paperclip. It was a butcher knife to her. It was a sword. Two hands. Yeah, two hands on it. It's so mean. It's a petty crime.
Starting point is 00:47:01 Small crime. Yeah, she like stabbed a guy with a knife or something. They had to call the police. I don't know. That's a gutsy move. Yeah. I mean, I don't know the size of her boyfriend or if, like why he allowed that to happen.
Starting point is 00:47:13 Surely you can just hit the stiff arm thing, right? And then they're doing this, right? It's just a picture of the other guy's shins. They're all sliced out. Do you have a cat? What's going on? Yeah. But shout out there, man.
Starting point is 00:47:30 Still making headlines, man. Bridget and Medji. Bridget and Midge. Still doing anything, staying headlines. I guess just the industry and the drugs got to her. Their head looked like a fucking demon. I always thought she was beautiful. Yeah, you know.
Starting point is 00:47:46 It's like you're doing a documentary on her. We should. She should have her own documentary. It's the bridge of the Mitch of documentary. All of a sudden, Tommy Pope, tires. Yeah, I think the drugs just got to her, you know. I thought she used to be so beautiful. At least half the length of a documentary.
Starting point is 00:48:00 Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is a bomb. And that feels like that happens, like, all the time. I feel like most of the porn I watch is, like, old. Mm-hmm. Even when you think it's new. What do you mean? It's always like 10 years old.
Starting point is 00:48:13 Oh. Like eight years old. Yeah. When you look up the person and they look insane. Yeah. Where are they now? You try to be one of those. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:20 Yeah. Yeah. They're all cryptkeepers. That is really funny. Jesus. That's funny. See somebody get like d-ped for an hour and they go, what's she's doing today?
Starting point is 00:48:30 Yeah. What are that lady's at now? Because they don't eat Chipotle Bowl every day. Yeah. They do. They have like a boxer's career. You know, when they like quit. and then they
Starting point is 00:48:42 and then they still take come back and you're like just to get knocked out a few times he got dementia it's like your boxer there's a guy
Starting point is 00:48:49 in the corner jacket off he's not fucking he's fucking nothing in the corner he died shortly after the city he had to be rushed
Starting point is 00:48:58 to the ER that was one way's jerk that was nuts dude that was very confusing Tommy put it in a group chat man brother it's got
Starting point is 00:49:06 I believe because he's throwing like you said he's throwing good parties That was what I said. They were still good-looking punches. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:14 Because his fucking head was leaving his body. Yeah, they're saying he's dead already. Or like close to... He died two hours after. That was like 10 years ago. Yeah. Good gravy. That didn't come up in my feet
Starting point is 00:49:25 until we talked about, obviously. Yeah. The Jews are listening, so they're going to fucking fire it off. Yeah. It is pretty funny that that came up. Yeah. I mean, he's not wrong. I'm not wrong.
Starting point is 00:49:37 I don't... I know. Poundtier. Keep it. Palantir is listening. Yeah. They're giving you the good stuff. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:44 But that's the one, because you really only, I mean, boxing, everything's targeted at your fucking head, man. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:49 So, you know, isn't that the most common sport where guys die? Yeah. And they get like Parkinson's like fucking. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:56 They deteriorate really quickly. Yeah, man. If you're really good, you're in the league for a long time. Is it better to have a good jaw or a bad jaw?
Starting point is 00:50:05 Like, is it better to just go ahead and get knocked out? No, the ultimate is dodging. Or to, obviously, Tommy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:11 You want to not get hit at all. I think bad jaw. I think if you have a weak jaw. Right, because then you go down. But if you have a strong job, you're taking, but you don't feel what it's doing. You're not making any money for all the... No, but if you're good at dodging.
Starting point is 00:50:23 I'm just talking medically, Tommy. Yeah, good at dodging, weak jaw. Then you... I'm trying to be a boxing. It's better to stand out of the way of the gun. I mean, right, everybody? Yeah, obviously, man. You look at Barry Sanders.
Starting point is 00:50:37 Barry Sanders, he never... Same thing with the McCoy. Because he's okay. Yeah. We had the three running backs on the Eagles that like they're bunnies and they go side to side. They wouldn't never crush straight on. Yeah. And right before they get demolished or about to be demolished, they would just dip. Yep.
Starting point is 00:50:53 And take the hit. Yeah. And it was just a roll hit. Now you can raise your children. Yeah. Right. Yeah. And Sanders did the same thing, but it was mostly his wear and taro and his ligaments and his joints.
Starting point is 00:51:06 Yeah, but he was like, I don't. It's not your brain. No, of course. Of course. You'd rather make that exchange, obviously. And him retiring, it was like, that set the whole course of life. It was shocking. What about like a Jerome Bettis?
Starting point is 00:51:16 Is he all right? Who knows? He seems like he's good. Because he did a lot. All he was was a bulldozer, but he was so big that maybe it didn't matter, I guess. I don't know. He's got to feel it every once in a while. I guess it's head on head contact.
Starting point is 00:51:29 It's got one of those ram skulls where it's like you're supposed to use it for that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. Sol's off his horns every morning. Yeah. So he can get his helmet. on? I mean, that or you're enough of a problem that people are mostly kind of getting out of the way. They're trying to like leg tackle. I think most of them were probably going for the legs.
Starting point is 00:51:47 You're right. Yeah. Nobody's going to head up with Jerome Bettis, man. You're like, let's... Just a 180 pound free safety. I'll do it. Just in a hospital the next day. God. Yeah. One of the greats, man. Shout out Jerome Bettis. Yeah, Jerome. Back when I watched sports more frequently. Yeah, the Irish. Did you get like You have like PTSD from the The bowl? Yeah
Starting point is 00:52:13 No I mean that's just Atlanta dude I mean it's sucked But you're just so used to it We're a battered wife Yeah That's what we are Yeah You just get used to it
Starting point is 00:52:22 Every city's like that for a while No matter how good the season looks We know that black eyes coming Because we said the wrong thing at dinner Yeah Yeah I've talked about this with you guys But you had a good run with the Braves
Starting point is 00:52:34 The Braves are ripping And now we're the best team of the league Spoiled. Spoiled. We were bad for the last, but we were not spoiled in the 90s. We got one world series. You were the fucking Cowboys.
Starting point is 00:52:43 One World Series. Yeah, but you were. Cowboys won three at least. Maybe four. They won three. It was three. Okay.
Starting point is 00:52:49 World, dude, no, the Braves, we won one in 95. Yeah. Maybe I just feel this way because you destroyed the Phillies.
Starting point is 00:52:57 Yeah, yeah. But perhaps the best pitching staff in the league every year for a decade. Yeah. And we got one world series. Yeah, that's crazy. We had Madax,
Starting point is 00:53:05 Glavin, Smolts. My boy John Rocker. Rocker was after there. Who's the fourth? It was Glavin, Smoltz. We had a bunch man. Maddox. Because you won the NL, I just assumed you guys won all of them. I will say, every year. It was like, yeah, we won the
Starting point is 00:53:20 pennant again. We won the pennant again. But then we couldn't get it done. People don't realize the Eagles until our first championship, we just won the division. Division, excuse me. And then we won the pennant a couple times. Division, I meant to say, yeah, yeah. Like two, three times. But the division, we just dom.
Starting point is 00:53:36 dominate for like 10 years. Right. So you don't think about it. Yeah. And then 10 years later you're like, damn, we only won one Super Bowl? That's crazy. Yes. Yeah. Right.
Starting point is 00:53:45 So that's how you felt. So that's how you felt. With the Braves. Yeah. Right. I was, dude, I was, because I watched baseball pretty frequently back then, I could almost name, I can name like 10 of our guys still, Javier before, Brian Jordan.
Starting point is 00:53:57 Yeah. Andre Scalarago, Julio Franco. Franco. Franco rolled. Like a lit Chipper Jones, obviously, Andrew Jones. Like I could go through that whole era. Yeah. And we got one fucking world series, man.
Starting point is 00:54:08 We had such good ballplayers and we just never got it done. Yeah, everybody who's not a bravest man I've talked to fucking hates Chipper Jones, man. Why? I don't know. He seems like a good guy. I think he was, like, if I'm remembering correctly, he was like a pretty clutch hitter. Yeah? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:24 So it drives you fucking crazy. I can't think of moments of his like a David Ortiz or something, but like, yeah, I mean, he was pretty fucking good. He's a whole fame. He's fucking unbelievable. Yeah, switch hitter. Yeah. Which is already unbelievable to me. It's crazy.
Starting point is 00:54:38 To try to hit a ball left-handed. I don't even... At that level? Right, exactly. It's crazy. And he would bat better left-handed, I think, some seasons. Yeah. Yeah, man.
Starting point is 00:54:47 He was a freak. That's crazy. I wonder if that's because the pitching's worse. Maybe they treat... Yeah, does anybody, like, notably a switch hitter now? Or not really. Who? I guess if you're good enough at one, it doesn't really matter.
Starting point is 00:55:02 Unless... But there's matchups, right? Yeah. Isn't it infinitely better to be able to bat righty if you're going up against the left? He isn't like left on left bad for the hitter? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot longer. Right.
Starting point is 00:55:15 But pitching has come so far. I don't think it's possible. Now everybody's just throwing 150. Yeah, and it's dancing. You know, I talked to a former pitcher about that? I forget, I'm blanking on his name, but he was on the Braves and he was on the strows. Yeah. And during their whole debacle with the trash can banging.
Starting point is 00:55:34 But I was asking him. I'm like, dude, why, Greg Maddox, 300 wins, Hall of Fame, he's not throwing 120. Yeah. He's a, he's a magician out there.
Starting point is 00:55:44 100%. I get that that's difficult. That's what are you mean? Skeens, I thought, he's a 120 guy. He's just gassing it in there every time. No, he's not, I know he's got movement on it.
Starting point is 00:55:54 No, no, dude, his control, he's an absolute magician. Yeah, I think he also has the gas. But he can also throw a 120. He's a big guy. Yeah. Yeah, that's the fucking, When Bionna or fucking LeBron James of pitching.
Starting point is 00:56:06 That somebody's doing that. But it seems like there was a movement. Get these guys just throwing 100. Right. And he goes, well, yeah, think about it as an investment. Like, you know, if that's your thing, you don't blow a rig out. No, no, you do blow it out.
Starting point is 00:56:21 But you already signed your deal. So now you get the surgery and now you got 50 million in the bank. Yeah. And that's worth it for some guys. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm like, Jesus Christ. I never thought about it like that.
Starting point is 00:56:32 I've seen a couple clips, like Instagram clips where they're like people complaining that like all the young like coaching is like they're trying to get kids to just throw as fast as possible. Like just throw gas. Well, that's just attention from the prospectors. Yeah, yeah. You know, the people are just recruiting. But like. Also, I got a heavy knuckleball algorithm. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:58 So it's those are fun. Kent DeColby. But how many guys are doing that? I don't know. The last one was. Tim Wakefield was the famous one when I was coming up. But Kent and Colby was like, OG. And who was the guy on the Mets?
Starting point is 00:57:08 J.P. something. G. I forget. I think you want to Cy Young throwing knuckle balls. Yeah, that's crazy. They can't control it either, right? Like, they just, I mean, they can like, obviously, they know where they're starting the release, but. They don't know where it's falling. Isn't that crazy?
Starting point is 00:57:23 They need, like, a specific catcher. Yeah? Yeah. That's just like a knuckleball catcher. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's got autism? Yeah. Dialing it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:30 A hundred percent. Left. Yeah. He's just doing a Rubik's Cube in the other hand. No, like this, the schemes thing, I saw this one, this one, I guess it was on Twitter or whatever. But they show like the objective challenge for a pitcher, throwing a fastball as opposed to a change up, is the same speed and different hand placement. Yeah. So you're seeing the same flow of tunneling.
Starting point is 00:58:01 That's the trickery. And it just enters the plate at a different time. Yeah. He does that with like four pitches. Nice. And I saw. So he's a freak. He's a fucking freak.
Starting point is 00:58:12 There's like they do that overlay. Yeah, they did the overlay. And they showed the speed of each overlay. And like usually the overlay, you'll see like a different hand movement. You'll see just like a different arc. You'll see his body shift. His body didn't move. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:25 His hand placement didn't move. That's great. The only thing that moved as soon as that overlay came out, the balls all came out in different places and dropped different. areas. Yeah. Right. So same speed.
Starting point is 00:58:35 You're watching this guy deliver the same fucking ball and its placement is in different four or five places in plate. It's also... How do you?
Starting point is 00:58:43 Didn't he just give up a few the other day? Or am I crazy? I think he got shared a couple terms. But it's also like that might just an off game or whatever. He's fucking crazy. It's also funny when
Starting point is 00:58:53 like a guy gets all that tunneling shit down and then he still does this every time he throws a knuckleball. You're like... I watched those. conboy things and it's just like yeah every time he throws a knuckleball he does like this yeah come on man yeah touches his hat it's fucking brutal but the the maddox stock was so sick when it came out i think it's still on whatever it's on youtube or some streaming service but yeah it's great
Starting point is 00:59:23 is that the one where it's him and bonds talking about did we talk about this on an episode already because it to me it's one of the best clips of just baseball it yeah it's maddx and bonds but They're not in the same room, but they're both watching the same at bat. And they go back and forth. And Maddox says what he's thinking. And then they go to Bonds. And Bond says what he was thinking. Yeah, it's so cool.
Starting point is 00:59:42 It's beautiful. Yeah. Yeah. And exactly what happens is what they were saying. And it's like a, you know, it's chess match. I know, it's cliche to say. But we may have talked about it because it struck up this memory I have as a Tony Gwyn. Tony Gwynne was, I mean.
Starting point is 00:59:56 Between all of your all-time best pictures. Smoltzglaven Maddox. He only, what, struck out like. Three times? Something. Something crazy. Yeah. It was something insane.
Starting point is 01:00:06 Tony, Tony's the freak, man. For like 10 years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, man. I had a Tony Gwynn action figure. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:14 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, dude. I like this. Rightfully so. Twins? Yeah. It's all ass.
Starting point is 01:00:22 A tiny little bat. I'd do that a hammer. Yeah, man. You needed it. Speed deem. Get that torque. That's why your parents bought it for you. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:32 They want to make you. anyone to look at him. Daddy's going to play with this too. This is your ass God. You get it Monday through Thursday. Daddy gets it on the weekend. God damn. You know how good Barry was
Starting point is 01:00:46 when he's talking? Because they show a pitch and Maddox guess wrong and Barry just scorches it out of the park. Yeah. And Barry just goes, oh yeah, I remember now. He threw him something inside
Starting point is 01:00:57 and Barry fouls it off. And then he tries it again. I don't know, a couple of pitch later. Home run instant. And the line, Barry goes, can't come inside twice, baby. Something like that. Can't come inside twice is what he says. He just knows it's a home run.
Starting point is 01:01:10 That's how good he was. This is like the baseball legends always defend Barry and like his natural abilities. It's like, yeah, the steroids build power. But I don't care about the steroids. I'll go on record. I don't care about the steroids anymore. Put them in the hall. Let's have.
Starting point is 01:01:24 Put him in. Let's have one year where everybody can do it. Yeah, well, there's already nets up. There's one year. What do you mean? And there's a cutoff. I don't know, I'm trying to have fun. I saw something the other day,
Starting point is 01:01:37 and there was like a... Or a metal bat home run contest? Dude, the metal bat, they still use them in college, yeah? I was watching a game on TV. It's nuts, man. These guys are juice to the tits. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:47 You give them a metal bat? The net saved everybody's lives. Yes. You got to have the net, but like, dude, you get a comebacker as a pitcher off an aluminum bat. Now you're pitching in the corner to nobody. You're still trying to throw.
Starting point is 01:02:00 It's like, He's been dead for five minutes, man. Just doing a wind-up in your living room. It's also true. The steroids are- Charlie, did you eat? Steroids or not, I saw some, there was something about Barry Bonsing
Starting point is 01:02:19 like a four-game series. Like, they only pitched to him five times. Yeah. He went like five for five with five home runs and like 17 walks or something crazy. He was like, I don't know if steroids. can do that.
Starting point is 01:02:34 You know what I mean? That's ridiculous. I guess the argument is maybe some of them would have been doubles or something instead of going out of the park. Yeah. But like whatever, dude. You're not getting hits like that.
Starting point is 01:02:44 Time heals all wounds. Yeah. You know? What's it been? 15 years? That Sosa McGuire run was one of the best things I've ever seen. Dude, that was like peak MLB, man. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:54 Greatest thing of all time. Again, when I was watching big time. Yeah. Sosa, McGuire. Yeah. Then Bonds came in. Yeah. You know?
Starting point is 01:03:01 Yeah. It was peak. And they did it. Like WWF. Yeah. That's what I was just going to say. They felt like professional wrestlers. Of course.
Starting point is 01:03:08 They were the same size. Yeah. Yeah. Every day it would just be like, dude, so, so passed him, man. Oh, no, McGuire passed him. It's like, I love this. Yeah. This is great.
Starting point is 01:03:19 Yeah. If you can get my dad cared about anybody about the Phillies, you know you're doing something right. Yeah, man. It takes roiding these dudes up to watch a ball game. Dude, you were following it. You were following the numbers. Who's ahead?
Starting point is 01:03:30 Who's hitting another one? All right. now he's going to break the record. It was like, it was pretty sick. And who was the guy from the Yankees? That, whose record they broke? What? You're talking about not Babe Ruth?
Starting point is 01:03:43 No, no, fucking. How far back are we going? Aaron Judge. He was old. It was like 50s, 40s or 50s or something. Like Mickey Mantle stuff? No, no, no. It was like, his name was like.
Starting point is 01:03:55 Oh, Maris. Yeah, Roger Maris. Yeah. Okay. And he's just old in the stands. Oh, yeah, he's there? Yeah. Just pissed off.
Starting point is 01:04:02 Oh, those are great. That era was like his wife. They cut to Kareem when LeBron broke his points. Yeah. I got to get up for this. Every time they cut to those guys, everyone on the, like everyone on television is watching is going, you're still alive? That's Roger Maris?
Starting point is 01:04:21 It looks like Emperor Palpatine. He's just melting his face. I thought that guy died 30 years ago. Yeah, we brought his body. It's weekend of Bernie's sake. He'd be here for the record breaking, you know? All right. It's also funny.
Starting point is 01:04:37 Those guys, they got paid like 80 bucks. They still parked on jobs. So they pull them out of like a home. Yeah. Yeah. How many players in the 70s and 80s? Where are you taking me? Somebody's about to break everything you worked for.
Starting point is 01:04:49 You know that one thing you still had? Yeah, that everyone knows you for? Well, that's over. Yeah. All right, Nick, you want to fire up some... Some stuff? Where to find you. Hey, come hit my Instagram, hit my line.
Starting point is 01:05:08 Nick Murphycom.com. I got some dates coming around. We'll get some more on there, you know. Got a little summer run. I'll be in Chicago and September. That's a ways from now. That's all right. But get your tickets now.
Starting point is 01:05:19 Because it'll look better. Yeah. I go to A.crisoconner.com. I got dates coming up. I got Raleigh this weekend, Detroit next weekend, South Carolina, June, I think, and then Baltimore. Nice. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:32 So check out. You can also see Nick on our last week's Patreon which I thought was a really great episode. We had a wild episode. That was so fond of it. You're going to like that one. We had a dig out of that one.
Starting point is 01:05:47 I wanted to dig out of Tommy's hell of that one. I was on one boy. I was on one. You were on seven. He told me when I showed up. Yeah, this is number five. Patreon.com slash stuff I wanted to see last week's episode. Nick and thanks for your support everybody head over to Patreon
Starting point is 01:06:05 hey oh yeah hey James McCann I called you all right I know he called me out last time he was on here said I didn't call him yeah yeah yeah it's why it's a friendly kind of thing but also you got to listen to all the episodes but also it's funny it is funny to respond on the air I don't even remember he said it to both of you yeah I don't fucking remember that all right sorry love you James I'll call you

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