Stuff Island - Stuff Island #39 - Pagans and boogie boards w/ H Foley

Episode Date: August 3, 2022

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Nothing would make the fans happier than us talking about sports and just watching a show about sports off camera for the whole thing. We almost had two Barstool dudes on here. Our fans are going to go nuts, dude. Skipping this one. See you next week. Queers. They fucking hate sports. Sports talk.

Yeah, not to pretend like i do too sometimes i mean what's funny is that people who don't really listen to the pat podcast but that that know of us think that it's like a sports show really yeah i was told recently by a girl that i don't look athletic it fucking crushed what yeah who's this whore what are about? Dude, it fucked me up for like two hours. I mean, nothing on earth would make me happier than hearing someone say that. Do you? I know.

Chris. But I still, I find that- We all love when one another get our asses ripped. But I still find that impossible to believe. Right. Yeah, that's crazy. I get that every once in a while. Your hair like that,

you surf these days. Shut put. Dude, he told me on the walk here from the parking spot uh he put sun in in his hair do you remember sunning really yeah i did it like maybe like a month ago down the shore my niece i think i saw some of that it was really blonde there for a while was it not my niece put some of my hair and i thought all right big deal whatever i never put it in again and it just kept getting lighter and lighter it looks great yeah yes i think it does it looks fucking wonderful start telling people that you don't know it's natural that's what i told him he goes you put sun in your hair i'm like nah

and it just gets lighter in the summer he's like like, oh, it looks great. I was like, nah, it's sunning. But I've been telling everybody that. Sunning was like, I mean, it's cheaper than like the box shit. Remember you just put lemon juice? No. Yeah. So in high school, we all just like grabbed a bucket of lemon juice and would just run our fingers through it. A little peroxide or something like that.

Or if I was working at like a restaurant job in the kitchen, I would like just take some bleach and rub it on my fingers and just streak my hair a little bit. Yes. Really? That's what the chicks like, man. Yeah. You got to lighten up.

I'm too dark. I've never done anything with my hair. Yeah, we're talking about the 90s. It doesn't matter what era. With your hoop earrings and your fallout boy. All right? We had to fucking earn our keep. We couldn't just show up with our feelings.

I've had a Lego man. Dude, I had my last name carved into my fucking bicep. All of my friends in high school would take a razor blade and put your initials in your bicep. And this one kid, Tierney, was like a middle school couple in a tree. Yeah. This was our bark. T plus P. Forever.

Tommy and Cassie forever. Yeah, this one dude, Tierney, went so deep, he cut a fucking vein. He had a big fat scar getting hit by a fucking weed whacker. That's his law practice now. Smartest one of all of us. Head of pediatrics. It's crazy. Yeah.

By the way, I picked him up on the street. I see him. He's walking down the street. He gets in a car. Told me he's like, can you be there at what you said? 615. 615. Yeah.

He gets in the car. Smells like a liquor cabinet. Wow. I stopped. First of all. Who gets? Who gets? I had. Had. First of all, I had, had has no place in this sentence.

What? I had to beer after the doctors. That was good news. That's when you get like a chance. Good news at the doctor. Good news or bad news, you were going. You fucking dickheads. I had to stop by the fish market.

That was stressful. And you got to cover up that scent. Just take a bite out of a fucking salmon head. This will get rid of it. Like I'm coming home to mom and dad. If I still don't want to smell like fish. Where were you? Down at that fish market again, huh?

No, we have to... No, I swear I was getting shit faced. What were you doing? Feeling the octopus? Yeah. You dirty little bastard. I swear to God, I called a bar right now. We'll prove it.

No, we have to cook dinner tomorrow for Look at Dish. What are you making? You said something about halibut or something? No, we're doing a dish on the heels of our fishing trip. We didn't catch any tuna, but we did catch striped bass. Yeah. Okay. And they were so large, we couldn't take them home because they're breeders.

Big, fat old dick striped bass that are coming all over the sea and you can't take them home. Okay. The striped bass had to be... My kind of guys. Yeah. They had to be between 26 and 34 inches or something like that, right? 28 to 34.

Ours were like 46, 48. Their things were huge. Bangers, dude. Footage is nice. Nice. So I was just gonna You know Play on that Was find striped bass

And the guy said They don't get them Until tomorrow and Friday Or not tomorrow Wednesday and Friday So I'm just gonna Striped bass or striped Oh fuck yeah

Striped yeah But no that's not good Cause they don't come Until Wednesday We gotta cook tomorrow So I gotta find another Monger that possibly has it Or else I'll just get

Chilean sea bass Did you say another monger? Yeah Fish monger that possibly has it or else I'll just get your lane sea bass and- Did you say another monger? Yeah, a fish monger. Yeah. Who are you, Harry Potter? What do you want me to call him, a fish secretary? A monger. It's a fucking monger.

That's what they do. They collect fishes from all over the fucking seas. It's like Santa Claus' origin story, a fish monger. It is funny to say I need to find another monger. Yeah, another monger. My first monger's out. Yeah, dude. I gotta fucking, listen, I got three cobblers to fix all my eels.

I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- I gotta fucking- to say I need to find another monger. Yeah, another monger. My first monger's out. Yeah, dude. I got a fucking list. I got three cobblers to fix all my eels. I got to find a blacksmith.

He got him in 1958. Jesus Christ. All right, I got to find a fish Mexican that can find out if they have more strength. You know a good guy that makes chain mail?

I'm looking for something to cover. Cover up my horse. I can't stop thinking about you. I got to find another monger. I can't stop thinking about you on a fucking surfboard. Just splitting into a bucket of styrofoam. I would never. Are you kidding me? I didn't even do boogie boards when we were kids. Really?

No, we weren't getting my boogie board. What? Dude, my mom wouldn't even buy us. Not that she wouldn't buy us. When we moved down to philly things are a little tight yeah and the first time that we went to go sledding it's a big hill by our house she were like all right can we go get some sleds and now we're not getting that gave us fucking cardboard boxes oh my god we're out there like a couple of bozos in our jeans oh my fucking just

which is the cardboard box of pants for sledding. The boat just absorbed the ice and water immediately. I had a brown paper bag around me. For underwear. And down ashore, it was body surfing or nothing. Yeah. There was no boogie. Maybe a cousin would have one. They'd let you use it for a minute.

But no, you got boogie boards? Man. Did you? I bet you could fly on some cardboard downhill. No, you can't. Guess what you can't. No, you can't. You mean I bet. Because it doesn't work. It's got a little bit of lamination on it. I bet you could fly on some cardboard. No, you can't. Guess what? No, you can't. You mean I bet.

If it's got a little bit of lamination on it, I bet you could fly. You got to see all the fucking exits. There's no flat bottom of a cardboard box. You have to get fucking Billy Mays out there to make that thing run. Are you kidding me? No, it sucks. We just went right into this now. You need a circle disc.

You get all fucking discombobulated. And by the time you get down there, you get tossed. You get a concussion. Come back up. Call your mom, dad. You know, you're all fucked up. It's no good. Were you a boogie board kid? I bet you were.

Yeah, we had boogie boards. You did, huh? Yeah. What? Fucking piece of shit. This is the problem with growing up in Connecticut is people can make any normal thing seem like you fucking rich. Yeah, rich piece of shit.

But you had shoes as a kid, you fucking pussy. Tommy probably stole his like a gentleman. Well, I had a friend that let me could hop no we had dude my aunt we used to go to this uh this hill and like darby or something and these fucking hammers these old school like uh like metal heads we call them hammers they were all fucked up they drink all night and then my aunt and uncle decided to take me to this sledding hill and they had one of those discs that all night and then my aunt and uncle decided to take me to the sledding hill and they had one of those discs that you just spin and whatnot yeah and i was scared they these hammers built this ramp in the middle of the hill and they were going off the ramp and

i was like too scared too scared older kids right yeah yeah i was only like seven i got you and all these fucking older kids are just getting launched off this this mountain in the middle of the mountain i'm like i'm not doing that let's go all the way to the left so she takes me all the way to left dude soon as i leave the top of the hill i just start start bending into the middle and i get launched off this fucking disc completely come off it come on. This hammer has to dive to grab me before I slid into a lake. I come back up the hill. My aunt's jeans are soaked. She pissed herself.

She pissed herself laughing because I got tossed so fucking high. You got a fantasy in you, I guess. We had to leave. I got one fucking run. And we had to leave because Aunt Mimi took a piss in her pants. Because you almost drowned. I got one fucking run and we had to leave because Aunt Mimi took a piss in her pants. I would like to see as her pants start to soak, the laughter dissipate. Because it's more serious. Just like a volume getting turned down. Yeah.

Dude, that was the fucking... Finding like a local hill to go wild on a sled. You know what kids today will never understand the terror of metalheads, older metalheads. Even though, looking back, they were probably like, I remember seeing a kid in a Pink Floyd t-shirt. I'm like, he's going to stab me. Then you listen to Pink Floyd, you're like, oh, these guys are all right.

And they're pretty metal. But at the time, when they'd get on the bus in a fucking black t-shirt. Metallica shirt. Yeah, dude, long hair, just reeking of Bernies. And you see these young pussies getting them from Target now? They're like fucking 18 to 23-year-old kids. They're wearing a Metallica shirt. At the fucking New York Sports Club, this guy...

No, this is true. I have Metallica playing. I had to ride in the trunk to the Mann Music Center and pay the guy five bucks outside to get my Metallica t-shirt. Dude, I'm listening to Appetite for Destruction by chance. And this fucking waterhead walks by me wearing a cutoff Appetite for Destruction shirt. And I literally pulled my phone. I was like, oh shit.

And then he took his earphone out and he's like, what's that? And I was like, I'm listening to it. And he looked down. He was like, what is, oh, didn't even understand the music. That's fucked up. You are 100% the weirdo in this story. Yeah, no kidding. He's stopping his, while he's working out.

Dude, dude, what are the odds? Metallica. What are the odds? Metallica. What are the odds? They sold millions of records and millions of t-shirts that we put that one on at the same time. You gotta have integrity when you wear it. You gotta know what you're wearing. Integrity?

You can't be rocking a fucking metal shirt and not be a fucking metal head. I wouldn't put that shirt on. I'd listen to the music. I'm not about that life. That's like wearing fucking, that's like getting a thug life tattoo on you. You're not fucking about that life.

I don't know, man. Take the goddamn thing off. It's metallic. Go back to Target, get a scented candle, and get the fuck out of my gym. Tommy does have a point. I know what you mean. A lot of people wearing Nirvana shirts now.

You can't wear a Rolling Stone t-shirt unless you know the blues. 100%. I was there, Liverpool, 68, man. All spiked up. Dude.

My first concert was Pink Floyd. My brother made me do whippets. The comments are all going to be Tommy thinks Metallica is metal. That's metal, isn't it? Is that not metal? It is,

but, you know, not to metal heads. Well, let's talk about sports. Something I know about that day. How old were you when you went to your first concert? How old was it? Eighth grade.

Eighth grade. Yeah. Your brother took you. Yeah. Made you do whippets. Yeah. Wow. In the parking lot.

Man. Yeah, it was great. If you had a time machine, go back and stop that, huh? Stop it? Yeah. Oh, really? That's, go back and stop that, huh? Stop it? Yeah. Oh, really? That's the first time you did whippets?

I would have bought two more balloons. Two for five? Suck my dick, dude. Dude, that was a deal. Go back with the money you have now? Yeah. Oh, good night. I would have took two, sold one, and then got a T-shirt, Pink Floyd T-shirt, and fucking

been about that life. I remember the first time I did cocaine, I think about that looking back like, ah, if I just would have got sick that night or something. Yeah. Who knows? You would have ran into it again. I'm sure. Yeah.

What do you mean? Yeah. It was the night before New Year's. What year? How old were you? I was probably 18 or 19. I think it was my first or second year of college. Yeah.

Yeah. Home for Christmas. For your age, too. That's very young. Yeah. Home for college. You your age, too. That's very young. Yeah. Home for college. You know, night before New Year's. This was when this pattern started.

Yeah. Get the shit. Get all the drugs the night before New Year's. Yeah. Save them for New Year's Eve, but we would just get them and take them all. Of course. Yeah. Yeah.

Fucking take them all fucking the night before New Year's. You ever meet a guy that saves half a bag of Coke? That's crazy. How? It's crazy. You wake up and your buddy's like, yeah, I got a saves half a bag of Coke? That's crazy. How? It's crazy. You wake up and your buddy's like, yeah, I got a little bit left. A little bit left.

What the fuck? I didn't even party last night. Give me that. You'd have to put a satchel over my head and throw me in a van taking me to a different country to not finish a bag.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've never gotten Coke and not immediately done it. It doesn't work. It doesn't work. What kind of... You know who does that shit? Kids who get the fucking Metallica t-shirts. That dork. 100%. I've never gotten coke and not immediately done it. It doesn't work. It doesn't work. Yeah. You know who does that shit?

Kids who get the fucking Metallica t-shirts. That's dorky. A hundred percent. They're not finishing the bag. Because they can always get more. Rich kids. Yeah. Yeah.

Boogie board. They always know something else is coming. This boogie board crap. That's why I eat a whole bag of- Piece of foam. What? A boogie board. I can't get over you thinking fucking a box of carports is just stroking down

a hill of snow. Come winter, I'm going to fly on a fucking box of carports. What did you have? Probably one of those nice ones with the rails and stuff like that. A radio flyer? A radio flyer. You bet your ass. You could steer with the front little angle.

It's got a boomerang on the front to take a right. You thought you could steer. If you turn that thing, you're just doing a flip. Oh the front. You thought you could steer. If you turn that thing, you're just doing a flip. Oh, yeah. That was a death trap. That was before any kind of like child safety. We would stack like four or five of us high on a radio flyer and go down.

You'd be absolutely fine. I got a piece of ice into my head because we go off a jump and just like bodies everywhere and just, yeah, cracked my skull bad. When they started doing the ones that were long and had like breaks in them and shit like that, oh man, I wanted that. Oh, fuck.

Just too old. Too old by the time that shit came out. Yeah, by the time that stuff became cool. They update that technology. You're like, God. Do they even have those in it? I feel like it's all tubes now. Tubes are big.

Tubes are big. Remember the conversation I had with you and Soder about the adult? I want an adult sled park. You know what I mean? Like the fucking, the shit is dangerous. Yeah. You go launching.

High speed. You go to a fucking tubing place. It's like Here's what releases the endorphins just shit yourself you got dump you got endorphins you can do that You could they don't have to have a designated one Yeah, but you know, I don't know any fucking hills that are that dangerous to get that feel like I'm alive I gotta dodge bus overpass on the fucking that's what i'm saying on the west side highway yeah i gotta do frogger in the middle of

fucking 95 feel anything you know i think they expect adults to go to like a mountain yeah go skiing loser like a huge hill i don You have to walk up it. I don't think this is that insane to think. Have you ever done that? That's real emasculating. Have you ever gone sledding at a ski resort? No. Oh, my God.

Oh, man. The lights would have to be out in that place. That'd be close. I would walk through the woods so they didn't see my car. And I would sneak up there. Your fucking lift tags on and shit like that. Looking like a bozo dude imagine like night tubing on like yeah they do man yeah it's weak as shit i'm saying

fucking i'm saying riding i want real danger yeah dude riding over through the moguls people throwing bottles at you when you're going that blue square possibly a black diamond if you got fucking real i want to get on a snowmobile. Fuck that. Yeah, they're kind of boring. Nah, I don't like that shit. What? Snowmobiles, ATVs scare me. What? I don't like it.

They get tired. Yeah, ATVs. I don't know anyone who's like- That's where it's at. Margin or dude, when we were kids, fucking, when those things started getting popular in the 80s, there was always somebody yep snapped his neck yeah did a flip something yeah those things were not dangerous yeah i don't know a single person who rides those regularly who still like has their spleen yeah he's always like he just had

to get some organ cut out yeah they all have cholesterol bites from biting the top lip slamming their fucking head on concrete dude philly they roll around with those right and right down fucking chestnut street they don't give a shit they don't nine cops chasing them dude even around here the fucking the zoom zoom latinos they go fucking the wheelies yeah the wheelies i don't mind i see this guy i'm sorry no please see this guy on 30th he he gets the attention of a cop because he's being a he's being a dickhead zoom zooming out front of like bars and restaurants and it's loud as shit and he he pulls his mask up and he's talking shit to a cop he's like what are you gonna do follow me come on come on pussy he's talking shit to a cop god damn and the cop just doesn't do anything because the way he's gonna go down

a one-way street yeah 85 miles an hour gone gone you ever see a dude take off from a cop on a fucking on a like a what do you call him like a crotch rocket on a highway they fucking buzzed a motorcycle yeah no no the zoom zoom ones what's a zoom zoom motorcycle not a dirt bike. The ones that go like fucking 200 miles an hour. Or like a Ducati or something? Yeah, I guess. It's a motorcycle. Yeah. Yeah, but it's not a Harley. It's a fucking Zoom Zone.

Yeah. It's a sport bike. A sport bike. Yeah. There's a guy who follows us. He's like part of the like sport bike. He's like in sport bike racing. Yeah.

He's like part of this circuit. Yeah. Like they're going around the track with like the knee on the side? Yes. Let's fucking set it up. What's his name? do you know his name uh i think it's like it's like garrett it's two g's garrett did he send you a message no i was like uh we were gardini and i were in the hotel room and we you know there's fucking nothing on tv in the hotel room so we're just watching tv before the show and it's like those super bike. It's one of those super.

And I'm just watching it like this is the fucking craziest shit I've ever seen in my life. Dude, they literally like when they break, they go fully on their front tire and then lean all the way over. And then when they're accelerating out of the turn, it's a wheel. Yeah. They're just flying. Yeah. It's so crazy. Yeah.

Fucking knee up. And Gargini goes, yeah, like one of these guys like messaged me. I wonder if he's like in the race. And I looked it up like on my Instagram. He followed me. I think he follows you. He better. Dude, it's like he got 11th.

Apparently he crashes all the time. He's the only guy. I looked him up on YouTube and it's like a three minute crash you should do it somebody somebody approached us about sponsoring uh this this young driver is in nascar and like obviously there's smaller like you know leagues and stuff like that working your way up to it but he had a race coming up and he's like, hey, man, because we've been talking about getting into racing. Yeah, you run into things the same. We should get in the race. Gonna blow this money somehow.

Let's fucking go. But it would have been 20 grand. We could have had the whole car wrapped as the RU garbage car. We just couldn't pull it off right then. But I think we're going to seriously consider doing it. Are you sponsoring a race? Yes. That's what I'm talking about.

Oh, my God. Wait, what league is this? This can't be NASCAR. He ran in the Xfinity Series last weekend at Indy. I think. Indy or Daytona. I'm not sure. Whatever race was last weekend.

Is it the ones with the big foil on top? Like the sprint cup? I'm talking the fucking... No. The actual NASCAR? NASCAR. He does drive the trucks, but he got bumped up into a car for this race. Holy shit.

Brad Perez. Shout out to Brad Perez. Dude. Fuck yeah. Go Brad Perez. Dude, if he won in the RE Garbage... Dude, that's what I'm talking about. Champagne.

I got the milk fucking dumping it on me. Are you kidding me? What's fucking dude? Down there in the pit wearing like fucking jackets that say AYG Racing. The headsets and shit like that. Doing little key bumps off the fucking hood. Absolutely.

Have you ever been to NASCAR? No, I've never been to a NASCAR. Fuck, my buddy worked for Sunoco once, like this was like 10 years ago. And he like, I guess had a good year. He worked for Sunoco? Yeah. You don't mean he like pumped gas?

Oh, it's stationed. No, he was on the turnpike. He was 10 cents to the dollar. Give me all the free lottery tickets I wanted. Believe it or not, Sunoco's big business. I went down with the NASCAR. Yeah big business now you're dirtball buddies so he was a fucking vp and she was doing pretty good she had like a good year and we got we got sold a lot of chico sticks that year he was flying off the shelves. Get this fucking out of here. You sell 200

taquitos, you get a seat on the track. You get pit passes, dude. You get pit passes. Dude. It was the coolest fucking shit. Hold on. I'm sorry. Were you down? Yeah, we got pit passes. We got everything. It was fucking unreal.

And dude, as soon as you hear those cars going, you're fucking five years old yeah this has got to be fucking awesome ever and you and the rules were this we went to whatever delaware's racing racetrack is and uh you could you could walk in with a 30 pack and just sit on it how old were you i was 25 mean, you're of legal age, dude. You're acting like this is such a fucking wonderful beer. You're still sneaking beers in? No, no, let us take our own beer in. Dude.

My buddy knows a security guard in the backseat. He can sneak in a 30. It's not a movie theater in eighth grade. If we sneak in the day before, we can bury a 30 rack out at Pit Road. And all we got to do is dig it up. And hammer it. All we got gotta do is unlock gate 4a okay you can bring it all the next time we go to an eagles game let's try to bring in a

30 pack it's all free baby a vip vip's nice it is it's good times we're supposed to go to a formula one race i know what's going on with that did you guys hit that picture we didn't know we got four thousand close. We're right on the line. Let's go. 250 away. What's the race? It's the Italian Grand Prix. It's the Italian Grand Prix in Monza. It's in Milan. Okay. Yeah.

It's a month away. Are you guys just going to go as spectators? Or what are you doing? Yeah. We've got a couple things in the works. We kind of know someone who's filming a documentary for Ferrari, so we might be able to. Is it the Sunoco kid? Yeah. He's got another good year.

Tommy knows a fishmonger over there. No, I've just been messaging with this. It's going to be all crab and champagne. Yeah. Carl F. at Sunoco.com has yet to respond That's awesome No, that's sweet That's good

That's fucking fun, man I don't know why, but it's just really gotten in my head lately You know, once that idea came up and, you know, it wasn't that much i mean you don't get much out of it but just for doing it would be pretty fucking cool to be trying to get in the car with them what are you nuts dude our fishing trip was so laborious but it was like at the same time we didn't sleep for two days we're on a boat for 12 to 15 hours yeah you didn't sleep on the boat did you no we couldn't we died we we drove to rhode island uh-huh probably got in the

hotel at like 11 yeah i tried to sleep for like two hours maybe max two rooms yeah we're doing all right even if you were doing great for some reason I picture you two always sharing a hotel room I don't know why that's a compliment yeah

we had to yeah there was there was outsiders we had to act like we weren't like that yeah we get up at 12 we get to the dock

at like two he's even had to tell once they go to bed you guys are all professional. Good night. Thank you. So we're looking forward

to working with you. Sneak into his room and build a fort real quick. Just six, nine under a pillow fort for fucking two hours. We left the dock at 2 a.m.

Throwing your rods out. 2 a.m. Do we have to leave a tip if we do that? Oh, yeah. And then it takes us three hours to get to where we need to fish.

Out. You're going out there. Yeah. And the boat. Non-stop. I don't like that. That's scary. Full fucking.

How many miles out do you think you are? 60. 60? Yeah. Dude. Yeah. Kippy was talking about that on the podcast, doing that when he was a kid, going out really far.

No one's coming to get you, man. Yeah, dude. You're done. Yeah. Nah, Coast Guard would be right there. What are you talking about? That's the mentality you have to have, though. Yeah, Coast Guard.. Yeah, go through your head and your in your heart. They got helicopters You think yeah, you get that maybe a call. It's you guys are you garbage? I'll just call him like hi. I'm my name's Henry Foley

Henry Foley from four One Racing? He'll be right there. You know, we sponsored our NASCAR team in a couple years. Old NASCAR Foley at it again. We were on the water for like seven to ten hours, I think. Yeah. Fishing. Would you want the chopper or would you want the cutter? I'd want the cutter. Is the cutter the zoom zoom

boat? No. Will you stop with the That means it goes fast. It does. It's not doing wheelies out in the water. boat? No. Will you stop with the- That means it goes fast. It does. It's not doing wheelies out in the water. It does though. That's exactly what it does. No, I'm talking about like the boat, like a, looks like a battleship, like a Coast Guard cutter.

Yeah, but is it called a cutter because it cuts through the waves because it's fast? I think that's just what it's called. That's why. Yeah. Maybe. Coast Guard cutter. Okay, that makes sense. Maybe it's cutting through the fucking- I'd rather have that cut into the camera really i don't want to get pulled up there dude some thing starts leaning and shit or i start spinning

yeah they're gonna cut me loose save the current the cutters underneath them like trying to catch. Like a baby falling out of a building. Yeah. You see that lady that was spinning? Oh, my God. The old fucking woman. She was, like, 78 years old.

I almost threw up laughing. You know what he's talking about? They saved some old bitch in the rocks. And as they were pulling up, she spun. She started spinning. She's out there hiking, these idiots. Yeah, I know. Old lady, dude.

And when I say the speed with which this thing is whipping. It was like a Gravitron. I was just going to say, it's like a Gravitron. And the whole time, it was like, ah, ah. And she's clearly knocked out after like the seventh spin. So you got some old bat shitting and pissing and throwing up in a fucking little, in a little, it's a, it's a, she's, she's basically being buried. I mean, that's serious G-force.

That's doing that shit. Trying to stay alert, dude. Shout out to Top Gun 2, by the way. That shit was fucking awesome. I saw that this weekend. Good night. If that was my mother or grandmother, I would be wet in my pants thinking about her howling, muffling in that fucking zip suit.

She's in a coffin. You're killing your grandma. Whipping her around in safety. How do they not stop that? You can't. Stop her from going. Why isn't it two ropes? Stop her from going fucking hiking.

I think the Coast Guard has looked into this. It doesn't seem like they have. Hey, no, two ropes. What her from going fucking hiking. I think the Coast Guard has looked into this. It doesn't seem like they have. Hey, no, two ropes. What's going on? Dude, that's a good move, though. You run test runs on the elderly. What's going to happen? Like, our heart went.

She's like, 75. They can't blame you. The old bat made a wrong decision. I just like the idea of me and Foley standing on the shoreline. Me going, that doesn't blame you. The old bat made a wrong decision. I just like the idea of me and Foley standing on the shoreline, me going, that doesn't look right. Oh, you know more than the Coast Guard. I think they got this through. Jesus, man.

Helicopters on fire. The kid's got a point, I don't know. Check two ropes next time what fellas she survived right sorry otherwise we wouldn't be talking about

no I think she survived but holy shit that was such a weird moment God bless her soul by the way you said you were pissing in your pants

dude I was laughing so fucking hard I watched that like 30 times back to back. Just thinking, if it was a normal person, I wouldn't have laughed so hard. Yeah. The thought of just having a blue hair in there, whipping around, just losing her bowels. You know what I mean?

Old people falling down is pretty good. Your asshole's a broken fucking rubber band by that age, dude. There's got to be schmutz everywhere. Oh, fuck. It's just an open barrel of sewage. Just puking up Olive Garden's early bird special. You know that Coast Guard took that fucking crate they were holding and just tossed it into the ocean. We can't power spray all this. Ma-ma-dee-lay-la this fucking cage. Tossed into the ocean. We can't power spray all this.

My mom DNA left this fucking cage. You know, Sarma Bin Laden. Yeah. Slider off the USS Reagan. Hey, good luck, lady. Oh, his grandma DNA can't get off. They just get her up there and put an American flag on her. I can't throw a mattress out when someone dies. But she's okay, thank God.

She's good. She's good. She might be dead now, but that was years ago. Oh, my God. Hell of a segue, Tommy. I'm sorry. It's very funny. That's why I love, like, you know, you were saying, like, I don't have that balance, like,

for, like, skiing and all that stuff. You weren't a skier? I'm surprised. We skied once a year in the Poconos. That's why I love like you know you were saying like I don't have the balance like for like skiing and all that stuff. You weren't a skier? I'm surprised. We skied once a year in the Poconos. That's it? Yeah we go to Camelback or fucking one of those by Walpole. We were spring mountain people. We did spring.

Spring is very close. That's like an hour. It's like a hill. It's a hill. It's a hill. It's a bunny hill. They have a tow rope to get you up there. You know the tow rope?

Yeah. Talk about laughing. Dude, my fat ass getting drug up that thing. Fucking brand new CB jacket. Fucking trying to look cool. Brutal. Brother's friends all laughing at me. Did you bomb down the mountain or did you pizza?

I pizzaed. I only did it once. I was like, this is fucking dumb. Yeah. Scared as shit shit and then when i got up on the lift i was like what the fuck i had too much anxiety for that stuff yeah even young even young you didn't oh dude my anxiety was worse when i was a kid i was scared of everything really oh dude i thought i was dying like every fucking three days yeah i couldn't handle that shit i used to have panic attacks walking up the stairs to the uh the water slide like the high one oh yeah i feel like i was having a heart attack yeah that i get to it's also about 225 back then

yeah the cocaine halfway up didn't help eight-year-old fucking having a heart attack as soon as you get to 20 feet we'll do one little bump did you ever cannonball from the top uh what do you mean what yeah from that high dive can he's talking about water slide yeah water slide oh i thought you meant the high dive of the pool high dive what do you think i was born in the 20s who had a high dive you guys didn't have a high dive no that was an olympic pool by you no they just pools had those like the nine meter, whatever, board. Yeah, maybe you and the Kennedys up there.

What are you talking about? I was talking meters. You guys never saw a high dive. Yeah, in like old movies and shit. We've seen a high dive in a shitty pool, which is like seven feet. Can't have a high dive in an above ground pool. You killed somebody. The high dive, let me give you a quick history of the high dive.

Hold on. Did you guys. I would not be surprised. You know a shitload about high dives. Chris the Bird O'Connor, ladies and gentlemen. Doing the triple whimpy. Did you have a pool? No.

So you guys had a community pool. Yeah. That you went to. Which had a high dive. Yeah. Did it have like multiple ones? Just the two. Did you have the one where it wasn't a dive, just like a ledge that you went to that which had a high dive yeah was it did it have like multiple ones uh just the two did you have the one where it wasn't a dive just like a ledge that you jumped out all right okay that's that's like that's crazy that's crazy i've seen those like colleges and shit wait what so like professionally like you know yeah the platform platform at a

certain point it's not a diving board yeah i thought you meant the platform like is from the the ground like you just walk out if you feel no you know when they get a certain point, it's not a diving board anymore. Yeah, I thought you meant the platform is from the ground. Like you just walk out a few feet. No, you know when they get a certain height, it's just you just walk out. That's an Olympic pool. Yeah. You can't have fucking diving boards up there going another 30 feet. Yeah, exactly.

It's a story pool. Yeah, but they don't use that anymore. No. That pool's like fucking three feet. Too many dirt balls have been pissing and doing drugs in it. No, I'm sure somebody fucking broke their neck jumping off the side of that or something. It was a lawyer thing.

Shut that down. Yes. Definitely. That's why they got rid of all that stuff was insurance. No. Because some fucking idiot wanted to be a cool guy and went off the side and fucking cracked his head open. I like this kid.

Ruined a good time for everybody. Yeah. At least the snack bar is still open up. Go on the high dive. Yeah. Any age, you could just get up there and jump off. Yeah, we did do one, but it wasn't that high up. But it was still a diving board.

It wasn't a ledge, like a YMC in Phoenixville. And that was fucking frightening. This is crazy, dude. You're up there? No, I couldn't do any tricks. I was jumping out of an airplane. No, yeah, no. There's no way.

You're just eight years old. The whole pool is watching you. And you just got to walk back to the rails. And walk out to the edge of the board. It was like, come on, just jump. Yeah, fucking hell. Kids can be cruel. Dude, speaking of hammers.

Okay. This is how I grew up. There was a whole group of pagan biker guys that had kids that were uh neglected and they just didn't go to school and they joined this little gang and they had like chain wallets yeah chain wallets and like guns and roses cut off t-shirts and shit all the metal bands and such and they would sit on this trestle but hold on you had actual pagans living in your neighborhood yeah pagans are are one of their biggest populaces from Delco. Skip the potluck that year, huh?

Yeah. Hey, a mad dog made a hell of a green bean casserole. So we'd walk through this- But they weren't like murdering goats in the woods. They were just- No, they were just drugs. They called themselves pagans. No, they were drug running and guns and shit.

Wait, why would they be murdering goats? No, I mean, they weren't like old school pagan. They were a motorcycle gang. They weren't like- No, it's a gang. What, like worshiping Stonehen why would they do murdering goats? No, it was a motorcycle gang. They weren't like old school pagan. They weren't like, No, it's a gang. Worshipping stone heads. What are you talking about? I thought that's what I thought you were concerned about.

They weren't scared of the sun. Couple of day walkers walking around. Or worshiping like a goddess of grain. You knew what he meant. You were trying to be funny. I knew what he meant. I thought you were like, you had actual pagans. I was like, no, no, no, no.

This is a gang he's talking about. I don't think you did. I think you're pushing off on Bollie right now. I didn't think he was living next to a Germanic tribesman. Anyway, we're doing a sacrifice in the woods for these pagans. So there I am, killing a virgin.

Killing a virgin and a baby goat at the same time, one night. Well, we want the harvest to be good, don't we? What are we going to do here, huh? Someone's got to go. If you don't kill this bitch, you get no corn. Talking about moving smack across state lines. Well, you got to move those perks. It's not going to rain. It's a group of, you know, fat, hairy fucking.

Do they all live in one house? No, no. It was a whole fucking community of pigs. How shitty was your neighbor? It's not the outsiders. Yes, it was. How shitty was it? There was one house in the neighborhood.

It's fucking 70 pigs in one house. Why would we make it less trashy. The fact that multiple members of a motorcycle gang were able to get mortgages in your neighborhood. True. Where did you grow up? Is this Goldilocks

zone? Oh, you had a fucking hub hub hole. Oh, trash. Not nice to the fucking Hells Angels. Boogie boards, you rich pussy. Bunker gang, you poor a fucking hoverboard. Oh, trash. Not next to the fucking Hell's Angels. Boogie boards, rich pussy, biker gang, poor fucking sack of shit. Middle class. Somewhere in the middle, dude. That's actually true. Jesus Christ. That's actually true.

Anyway, we'd have to walk over to this fucking... A neighborhood has one guy with a motorcycle. I started this fucking 10 minutes ago. Unbelievable. Multiple pagans. It's a gang. There's got to be multiple. There's a whole hierarchy.

Then there's a whole fucking sublet. You know what I mean? You got fucking Don. Were they nice guys? I think real pagans were fuck the pagans up. No, they were pieces of shit. They would fucking jump you and you went through parks and shit. The kids would?

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, the old people were just sitting like VFWs and fucking Polish club. So you're saying these people would hide in the woods and attack you? No. That sounds like what you're kind of looking for in your sledding experience. You'd hire them to come to the sledding hill. They're not even taking turns.

They're not even taking turns. It's like they came in and were like, all right, look, at one part, one segment, we're just going to fucking motor mouth through anything he says. He'll be so confused. He'll be bopping from your face to my face. Stone edge. Yeah. So post-sacrifice, I had to get to school. Stonehenge Yeah so Post sacrifice

I had to get to school No I had to walk over this fucking Trestle which had like a I had to get this goat blood off me I got a final In an hour what are we doing here I fucking hate I hate this so much Go ahead I'm sorry I'm not going to say anything Unless I think it's something real funny I hate this so much.

Go ahead. I'm sorry. No. I'm not going to say anything. I can't say it. Unless I think of something real funny. I'm probably going to hit you with it. This had something to do with high dives. It did.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So thank you, by the way, because I totally forgot. That's what I was talking about. Jesus Christ. That's what I was talking about. No, so that I didn't, like I got, they would make you, so there was a trolley track that was behind my house and we'd walk the trolley tracks.

You had a fucking trolley in your neck? You fucking degenerate loser. You had electric transportation in fucking Dillow. A trolley with A train yard. We didn't have my parents driving me to grade school. Just bugs running through school. How many roads

have you got there, boy? Coming up on a Chinaman on the ride. Sticks of TNT. sticks a tnt i didn't say that we built the fucking railroad we had a trolley track it's a fucking local trolley i was actually it's a shortcut to high school you fucking assholes and grade school shortcut to alcoholism that's what it is

this story will end on the Patreon it's gonna take another 40 fucking minutes in Tommy's defense the Philly trolleys yeah so it's a little bit different I don't need defense In Tommy's defense, the Philly trolleys. Yeah. So it's a little bit different. Yeah, I don't need defense, right?

Nobody asked for defense, you fucking dickhead. I'm just telling a story. It's so funny to blame him. I'm not just telling a story. He asked me to tell you how Tommy was struck. He said it like I was like, look, Hitler had a point. No, you fuck. I'm saying we cut the time and we went down this trolley track to this trestle.

The trestle was like 40 feet high. And there'd be a pack of fucking hammers and they would make you jump. And unless you had like a brother that they knew, they'd fuck with you. I had two older brothers. So they were like, don't fuck with little Papa. And they made one of my buddies jump. Jump into the water. Yeah.

So you'd have to climb over a railing. This is on the way to school from the track yeah jesus christ yeah and you have to sit on this little fucking edge which is the piece of uh the pizza piece of wood and then you'd leap into this water down below and it had one little section that had an egg that was darker otherwise you could see like license plates and car tires and fucking shopping carts and all the short it's dog shit. It's where these dudes like just throw fucking bottles. They're drinking 40s, it's fucking 9 a.m. They're like nuts.

Did you always have just like dry clothes in your locker at school? Just in case. Like Spider-Man? And then they would shoot you with like BB guns. Shit. Shut up with a down. They'd shoot you with BB guns on the way down?

Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. They would sit in a... So there was one time where they... I like this dude, this dude Beswick. Shout out, KB. I went to public school. He's dead.

What are you doing? No, he's not. He's alive. Oh, one of your friends, not one of the pagans. Yeah. So I went to kindergarten, first grade at this public school. And then there was a split. So everybody that was in public school, a bunch of these dudes would just hang out and fuck off.

And one time I just wanted to be cool. And then we'd just sit in the woods. And they'd be drinking 40s in the middle of the day. And they would shoot the trolleys with BB guns. Shit. And I just tried to be to be that i tried to be fucking cool for a while you shot you shot trolleys with i don't know where this turned into the outsiders my brain is so fucked by the word trial i just can't stop laughing. A trolley's not a train. Like painting tunnels on a rocket.

It's so cartoony in my head. Yeah, well, we all didn't have fucking BMWs. Yeah, radio flyers and fucking high dives. Yeah. Scumbag. Jesus Christ. You kids had cars in fucking eighth grade. Dude, it was crazy. There was kids that would drive like M5s to school.

It was nuts. God. What's an M5? A BMW. A ridiculously expensive BMW. school oh he's nuts god what's an m5 like a bmw expensive bmw i got no i had a couple couple friends that were very wealthy their parents were very wealthy and we got into an accident remember when they the when they started making the mercedes like when it changed over from like the old school mercedes to like they got a little bit nicer and newer and it looked more modern. Yeah. You remember like that

first, it was probably been 90, 91 when they switched over. Yeah. You know what I mean? We got into an accident with one of those fucking driving around a turn too fast. And if we weren't in that like nice of a car. Night, night. We all would have got killed. So the cops, first thing the cops

said. Really? Yeah. He's like, you're lucky your parents got money. He didn't have that accent. I don't know why. You guys were in Tennessee? You're lucky the Piggins didn't get you, boy. Yeah, they were like,

if you were in a shittier car, you guys all would have died. You're in Bucks County? Montgomery. Montgomery. Yeah. Yeah. Skip.

They're like, now get into this, get into this bucket. Get in there and let's- Get in this corporate box, we're gonna slide you down the hill, you fucking idiot. You bring in the big boy,

this fat son of a bitch, gonna pull the copter down. Did you slide down your steps in like a laundry basket? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Dude, that was a fucking ride. Bunch of blankets, bunch of blankets and go

blankets yeah we just wrap ourselves in like two comforters and just that's like your helmet duck yeah your protection fucking roll yeah dude we fucking we would just blow through that fake wall down in the basement that was obliterated in every wall you know like a fake little paneling yeah it was like olive green with black stripes that looked like fake wood no we just ride like a fucking laundry cart and smash right through it what was on the other side of the wall it's concrete but it was like another six inches dude yeah i know it was like cones on the side of a raceway sure like luon or like uh like uh what's it called the shit that we have in the studio the yes fake wood panels yes yeah yeah and then we just blitzed all of it in every angle because my we had nowhere to play like sports

yeah dude my my dad never fucking fixed it it was just all exposed brick there's no i mean when you have boys there's nothing that doesn't make sense to fix anything yeah that's when you need to get a couple of some real friends when you're over their house and saw holes in the wall like all right here we go. Yeah, yeah. My kind of people. You know, dad's angry as fuck. Yeah.

You know, the hamburger helper was coming around child time. It better. Especially if the Eagles lose. My real backyard was just mud when my brother and I lived there. And downstairs in the basement was just hockey pucks had destroyed all the drywall. He would just shoot hockey pucks at me. Yes. Yeah.

All like 15 years. He would just shoot hockey pucks at me. Yes. Yeah. All like 15 years. He just pounded. One of my brother's best friends, Komorowski, rest in peace. He had this place in- I knew Komorowski. It's a Polish family that got us into the Polish American Club.

You have to know a Polish family. Yeah, I was a card carrying member. So you could go to the bar and then take this card, beep in and it was like late night till like 5 a.m. and just drink when you're like 19. My uncle was head of the Polish Union yeah i was a card carrying member so you could go to the bar uh and then take this card peep in it was like late night till like 5 a.m just drink when you're like my uncle was head of the polish union in wilkes-barre we used to get uh shit from him and he had the falcon on it he had the polish falcon on the car i believe so yeah this dude downstairs he's like come downstairs he was like

at that time he was probably like 35 38 years old And he would just line up golf balls. And he had one strip of drywall that had wallpaper that was just forest. And he would let you hit off his carpet directly into the forest. Just smoke balls into the fucking drywall. And I'm like, you know how many balls are back there? Because it's just littered with pockmarks. Why don't you hit the fuck,

if you don't hit a stud. This was your boy at his parents' house? My brother's best friend, yeah. Down in their basement. No, his house as an adult. He was like 40, dude. That's how you find out how truly psychotic he is. Yeah, absolutely.

You know how these balls are back there? He's like, in the woods? I don't go in the woods. I can't. There's pagans out there. I can't pass the brush line. Moonlight Graham and Field of Dreams. I'm allergic to pine needles. Hey, it ticks back there.

Oh my God. Oh shit, do we have ads we have to read? I don't know. Do we have to read? I have no idea. You guys do them live? Yeah. We can just do them after. No, don't be silly. Do the ads.

No, no, talk. What the fuck? Shit. You saw Top Gun. Saw Top Gun. That's massive. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty.

That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. That's nasty. Top Gun was fucking awesome. Not as good as the original, I have to say. Of course. Not as good as the original. And a couple of things.

This is going to be real nerdy. Yeah. But the guy who runs the school wouldn't then go on the ship and call the fucking, call the plays for the mission. Jon Hamm's character. Oh, yeah, yeah. And plus, who the fuck, the one guy had glasses on. What are you doing here? You want to be the pilot?

You can't wear glasses and then fucking F-18. You can put contacts in. But he had glasses. Yeah, you got to be 20, but the dude, he was wearing glasses. If you got retarded eyesight, you can't get in. Yeah. Is that right? Yeah.

Can't be too tall either. You got to be a certain height. Yeah, I am good. I was watching Lenny Dykstra and I was liking it. Hold on, hold on, hold on. You can pull off fighter pop. Did Tommy just leave? Yeah.

What are we doing here? You're cutting this, right? Yeah. No, no. Put that 30 for 30 back on. Can you wear contacts in a fighter jet? Dude, they'll go in the back of your eyeballs. You gotta have

20-20 vision. You ever learn any Dykstra story? Even if you need prescription eyeglasses, you can still be accepted in the Air Force as long as you meet a few base... Don't plan to wear contact lenses. The Air Force doesn't allow them during basic training and discourages their use in the field. What a fucking-answer that is discourages do what they'd rather have

you blind up there flying around the way that says as a pilot you cannot have 2020 vision still get in yeah i don't know that air force other jobs. It's not just pilots. It's true. See if fighter pilots can... You can get corrective surgery. Ah, there you go. Well, this dude had glasses on in the movie. You're right. Yeah. In the plane?

He was in the plane. You didn't see it? I did see it, but I wasn't looking at the glasses. You don't remember the kid sitting in the back seat with the... I remember the back seat. Bob. His character was Bob. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I remember the guy with glasses. Yeah. But I wasn't- Yeah, he had them on in the plane. I was more concerned that there was no way they would use F-18s for that mission. Oh, really? Yeah, they'd use F-22s. What a nightmare.

No, but he said that. What a nightmare watching a movie or something like that. He said the F-22s are out. Because there was something in the briefing in the beginning when they first approached him. He's like, wow, you can't use F-22s. You're stealth because I can't remember what it was. Yeah, whatever that was was not a real answer. Yeah.

Is that how you would have done it? Yeah, no, because that whole move going down and up. Two ropes on the thing on the helicopter. Yeah, yeah. Double F-19 slide right in there. You got to barrel through with an F-27. The stealth is better in the F-22, and it can handle more Gs,

and it can make that move much easier. It's got thrust vectoring. Shut up. Shut up. You're going to get crushed by dudes that know anything about this. I already... Hey, I just wondered that know anything about this. I already, you know what I'm just wondering, every time you do this. No.

I was like, you fucking idiot. I watched interviews with fighter pilots about this movie because I was like, there's no way they would use F-18s. Am I nuts? And they were all like, the movie was sick. That's worse than stopping the guy at the gym. You're probably in the movie thinking like, F-22s, huh? No, I sat there and i

took it i was like don't i took it don't say a word that's not because he spent 25 dollars on the ticket otherwise you're like that's it don't let me hear the movie you lose it during the briefing you're like what the fuck this is bullshit yeah yeah and then they're gonna get them all killed what are you doing i was. Yeah. And they're... You're gonna get them all killed. What are you doing? I was sitting there, too, because they're fifth generation planes, not operational. Who's fifth generation planes? The enemies, those fifth generation planes they're worried about, they're not

operational. I've seen them. The Russian... Yeah, no, they exist, but they haven't been used in combat because, I don't know who those were. Well, they gotta use something for the movies. They're not gonna give you fucking normal technology. I'm saying I got past it. I enjoyed the film. The were. Well, they got to use something for the movies. They're not going to give you fucking normal technology. I'm saying I got past it. I enjoyed the film. The first Top Gun, they were all fucking...

They were out of date. F-14s, dude. They were out of date. No, but the other planes in the original Top Gun were American planes still. I don't know what they're called. No, they were fighting MiGs. No, they weren't MiGs.

I'm pretty sure they were. I'm positive. What were they? They were American planes. I've seen some fucking interviews. no they weren't i'm pretty sure they're positive what were they they were american he's also seen some fucking interviews damn you guys are pissed i was gone i'll go back in there if you want to finish this they were american planes i'm gonna say the enemy planes were american planes oh daddy there is no there is no kind of mig that at the time there was there wasn't that kind of mig didn't exist uh mig 20 mig 29 is real mig 28s i think it was there was no mig 28 at the time they were they

were they were american planes this is some autistic train loving shit you guys have never been in a cockpit good fact i want to look that up for what what? I thought they were Migs. I'm a big fighter, Jack. I love all that shit. Really? What? Fuck yeah. What are you going to use this for? What do you mean?

What do you mean use it for? Are you going to shit on somebody at a bar when they bring up some dumb shit? It's like saying that about somebody who likes sports. What do you mean? We enjoy it. What? Because it's like you see an athlete doing something incredible. You go, that's awesome.

I like seeing someone do that. Sports are on every day for the last 100 years. You don't like cool airplanes? You don't like you see an athlete doing something incredible. You go, that's awesome. I like seeing someone do that. Sports are on every day for the last 100 years. You don't like cool airplanes? You don't like going on an air show? My dad was in the Navy. I think that's probably why. I watch air shows the way I watch NASCAR. I know.

The time cap. Get the fuck out of here. The Olympics. I want to see disasters. I want to see a fucking biplane run through the crowd. You ever see a montage of air show disasters? Oh, yeah. Wonderful.

Nothing wrong with that. And when chicks do the triple Lindys on the fucking Olympics, I want to see an ankle go split. Jesus. I want to see people slide around. Train your whole life for that stuff. I know. That's the point.

That's what you like. You want to have a little drama. I don't want to see a fucking 10 score. Suck my bird. I want to see this woman fucking cry. Break your neck. Come on. No, I wish it worked.

My only other critique, too. Did you see the movie? What? Top Gun. Yeah. Is Jennifer Connelly seen the new a lot about a top secret mission? Yeah. No, she was just a side piece in the first one.

Yeah, no shit. Remember when he comes back? She looks great. She wasn't in the first one. No, she wasn't in the first one. No, she wasn't. Her character. They replaced her character.

They gave a little nod to Kelly McGillis with the Porsche. That was my problem, dude. Because she drove an old school Porsche. That was my problem. There was too many callbacks to the original. Sure. They shoehorned in a callback almost every fucking scene. It's like, let this be its own thing.

Right. A couple callbacks are nostalgic. It's nice. Yeah. You give a nod to the previous film it was constant they even used like the same fucking like the same lines as like the son used the same lines as his dad the fucking volleyball scene the football scene was so they were singing the song too weren't they yeah he gets on a piano which is like dude what are

you doing the football thing i could use a little more of. Dude, are you kidding? They were hot kids. No doubt. And I'll tell you what, that's pretty sweet. You're always on offense. I don't know if that's a real thing. I don't think it is. I think that was a way to get out of that scene.

True. How do we decide who wins? Nobody cares. That whole scene, I just wish there was a Russian fighter pilot just going, just smoking them all. I got real upset with that shit. The movie's four hours long. We got to get a whole new unit. They go to every funeral.

Do you have anything to plug, Pulse? We got to go to Peach. Yeah, we're all over the road. Are you garbage? Come out and see us. Come see a live show. It's a good time. Good winners.

People to the show. Otherwise, check out the podcast. That's it. I love you guys. I love you too, bud. Thanks for stopping by. No, I ain't. Just so that you want me to leave. What the fuck? No, no. You're sticking by. No, I ain't. No. You want me to leave?

What the fuck? No, no. You're sticking around for the page, right? Of course. Is there a good date? In October. Don't worry about it. In September, I'll be in Boston, 16th and 17th at the White Bull Tavern.

There you go. Yeah. The little headline? Yeah. That's what we're talking about. So that's it. You can check out acrissoconner.com

for all my other dates. Was Chris O'Connor taken? Yeah. Yeah. Good question. Yeah. Yeah, of course Chris O'Connor's taken.

What is A. Chris O'Connor? Well, I didn't want to do Chris O'Connor. No one, okay. I did this a long time ago. Everybody made to send an email to us. I didn't want to do Chris O'Connor. No one, okay. I did this a long time ago. Everybody made to send an email to us. I didn't want to do Chris O'Connor one or Chris O'Connor something else. Chris O'Connor comedy.

So I just did A. I'm one Chris O'Connor. Why is it so bad? Why does everybody shit on that? What? If it's comedy. I don't know. I don't, I just.

Because I'm comedy. Yeah, I guess I'm deflecting a little. I did think the A, Chris O'Connor was creative at the time. Is your middle initial Andrew or something? No. No, it's just like instead of Chris O'Connor 1, I'm one of many Chris O'Connors. I'm A Chris O'Connor.

Oh, A Chris O'Connor. Ah, Chris O'Connor. I don't own an augment. There's not a single person I've said this to. That's what you're going to say. There's not a single day I regret doing it. You wake up in the middle of the night. What was I thinking?

Stupid joke. Nobody's going to get it. That's one of those things that I try not to think about. Just another chrisocounter.com.net. Yeah. Dot link. I thought that was your middle initial or something. Now.

Yeah. Just a bozo. I've not said this to one person and had them go like, oh, that's pretty cool. Not even trying to make it, not even trying to like soft sell that they kind of like it. Everyone's like, yeah. All right. Thanks for stopping by. You know how many fucking emails and texts I get going it's we're not getting through

chris's email what's the problem like well he's got this fucking email it's not and he's like well did they say er instead of or i'm like no they're saying the right email they just can't for some reason get to you yeah because of your choice is your instagram handle a chris o'connor too yeah hey you really went all in, huh? Yeah. I'm stuck with it. You definitely had business cards made up with that chick. No. Did you ever have business cards made up in comedy? For Montreal.

Ah, that's pretty good. McKeever took a picture of me behind his apartment complex in Contra Hocken. That's pretty good. I remember when he... There's a brick wall and it's just me in his backyard. And he took a picture with his own camera and had him made it like a local shop.

How you doing? Tommy Pope. Nice to meet you. I just, I never painted one out. Would you go turn it like that? I wish. No, that's for that.

That is smart. But I remember we got ours in Philly and it was like, yeah. Fucking. There we go. A thick press.

It's the fucking 8,000 of them sitting in a fucking drawer somewhere they're so useless why the fuck would you what were you

because you act like agents and managers like how can I get a hold of you we didn't know what we were doing we were trying to do anything

I know you were trying to be professional and every once in a while you'd get someone like you'd have a good set and someone would come up to you and be like

you have a card or something like you know and you'd be like I set and someone would come up to you and be like, you have a card or something? Yeah. And you'd be like, I got to get cards. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. And you'd get 8,000 cards.

Meanwhile, the person at ASU owns the company that does the business cards. You should try this to print. Yeah. Hey, thanks, mister. I will. You walked out of your trolley tracks. It's good. What time is it?

It is 725. Oh, do you guys care if I have a Bernie? Was that fun? Was that okay? Yeah, that was great. Fantastic.