Stuff Island - Stuff Island #43 - can I buy you a drink w/ Brian Six

Episode Date: August 31, 2022

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Show off the display. Drag in the display. I'll show a fucking display. Dude, they used to have those on the boardwalk. My dad's got a Schlitz one. He wanted the dark game? This is the softball into the fucking recycle bin.

I got a Guns N' Roses plastic framed picture of winning the dark game. Left and fair, baby. Display. It is pretty sick because you can just, like, you just magnet it to the wall. Yeah, you put a little piece of paper, then you put a magnet,

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Yes It's unbelievable See that fucking See that volley to you It's been It's gonna fire you up It's been 10 days

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I want to hear the rest of this. For everyone you buy the plant a tree. Why? Yeah. Why? Save the earth. Forest fires. I hope it's on like a Christmas tree farm.

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click the link in our show notes so there you go yeah plant some trees plant some trees it's necessary yeah to balance all the you know yeah put some metal on your walls and some wood in the shitty towns yeah ruining our ozone do you ever cut down a tree live? Pretty cool. Yeah. Yeah, I did. We used to go to this place outside the Poconos.

It used to work. It used to work. Tree service sucked. Really? Horrible job. Yeah, dude. I was a ground guy. No, I was a ground guy.

It sucked, dude. It sucked. 90% of the videos. The wood trash for the chipper. Yeah, I'm dragging all the shit too yeah oh god dude that shit is brutal yeah that roofing is like one of the worst the two worst shit i ever did i worked as a landscaper and i worked at a um um uh what do you call it lumberyard oh yeah my dad's best friend had owned a lumberyard or ran a lumberyard potter that's where we got potter and sons oh that's kind of fun though i feel like a

lumberyard's kind of fun dude i just got ragged on by an old black dude all day long yeah because i was new me it was like prison yeah yeah and i just all i did was clean up the fucking area with a brush he's like oh, you ain't know nothing. He would bust my tits every fucking day. Dude. My brother made it three months. I made it like two, three weeks. That's how those jobs usually go.

I did like four months with the tree surgeon. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Come on. Yeah. That's how I felt. I got plans for happiness. I got to cut this off right now.

Do you ever paint? Yeah. No. I painted a deck once. You ever paint a deck? You paint decks? I mean, I work for a painting company. Like, we painted houses and shit. I fucking painted a once. You ever paint a deck? You paint decks? I worked for a painting company. We painted houses and shit.

I fucking painted a deck. With what? Protectant? No. I painted it. I painted it in white. Who's painting their decks? Oh, a Greek or Italian.

Some gaudy asshole. My parents. You don't paint decks. Dude, it was the hardest thing I've ever done. I was like, am I using the right brushes? I don't know why. Why were you using a brush? No, paint's like not.

You hand brush it out? Yeah, what are you supposed to brushes? I don't know why. Why were you using a brush? No, paint's like not. Are you hand brushing now? Yeah, what are you supposed to do? Use a spray thing? Yeah. Yeah. And it's like a. It's literally the one thing you should use. Isn't it just a chemical to keep the moisture out of the wood?

Yeah, it's just a sealant. Dude, all I know is. You put paint on it, it's going to chip like a railing. You can't paint railings. I think so. What if it's like the polyurethane-ish kind of paint, right? Yeah. That turns into like a gummy sort of thing. I don't know. what if it's that it's like the polyurethane ish kind of paint right isn't that that turns into like a gummy sort of thing i don't know if it's colored is it like a hard white like your shirt yeah yeah yeah over wood yeah i don't know what to tell you 60s no

63 did a stint in paint decks anyway these fucking guys they don't i mean yeah let's get into it oh yeah the fuck so we're Did a stint Pain deck Pain deck Anyway These fucking guys They don't I mean Yeah let's get into it Oh yeah the fuck So we're getting our

Bathroom remodeled Right I asked for A new vanity A new sink A toilet Possibly So just a whole new thing

Yeah we're hoping on a toilet I nailed Boy it would be great If our bathroom had a toilet Yeah I mean Yeah we're bucking up to change. Dude, 10 days without a toilet?

Hmm? 10 days without a toilet? That's insane. I'm pissing on everything. I'm pissing on the mint. I started pissing on the blueberries. Somebody asked why my breath smelled like Christmas. Every night, I get woken up to Christmas.

Wait, why? Did you guys just go out back? He does. Yeah, I do. Yeah. Tommy pisses in the sink. I piss in a cup first, then dump it in the sink. You were pissing on back? He does. I do, yeah. Tommy pisses in the sink. I piss in a cup first and dump it in the sink.

You're pissing on plates the other night. There's nothing in the sink when I fucking, when I actively wash them. You can walk 10 feet upstairs and use the bathroom. I was gone.

There were plates in the sink. You peed on them. You're Lucy Gosey at 3 a.m. You don't want to. So what are you, you just got to pee jugs? You got to jug next to it? Jug time?

Yeah, I got, you know, the bullet. Dude, it's fucking bulletproof. Your pants ever cross at night when you're out there whizzing on the blue back? Just do the jugging up? Two pissy ships in the night. You're dumping your piss out in this thing? Like, hey. Dude, the first couple of days wasn't that bad.

And now it's like, now it's genuinely humiliating to walk out there. What's humiliating to walk out taking this what's humiliating and i talked to him today at the coffee shop i called him and i was like benny can you talk to your fucking cousin because he's getting out of control it's been way too long he goes look do me a favor and go easy on him because he's doing me a favor he's in the middle two three jobs you know what i mean just relax if you can have a little patience i'd appreciate my patience if i took the bathroom out of your fucking house, what are you going to do for 10 days?

Yeah. With you and your squat and whop kids? And what do you have to say? He goes, I understand, I understand. But he's doing me a favor and pulling them off this and that. And look, you're going to have a new bathroom. He acted like he could out psychologically fuck me it was yeah yeah after all this you're gonna have no marble like shut the fuck up i just want to shit in a hole it flushes itself that's what

also makes it suck because it's hard being mad because you're worried that they're gonna do a worse job yeah yeah you get pissed off talking shit to a fast food yeah and they're nice guys no work's been done like that there's a lot of work done here's the problem okay this floor

as opposed to Shane's and downstairs Veronica's yeah we've been a tenant for 15 years started with Jesse Joy started like

it's been a comedy house for so you gotta be out for them to renovate that's why this this paint this everything

yeah you could see the the paint from their childhood where like a bunk bed ripped into the side of my fucking bed so it's crazy so this house is like 75 years old yeah so they picked the tub out i didn't say anything about the tub and he goes he just ripped it out benny's cousin anthony of course of course look i'm so grateful they're italian yeah for many many reasons.

Anthony goes, I'm showing him what I want done. He goes, I'm going to call my aunt and we're going to do the whole fucking thing. Why is she going to pay $20,000? And then I call Benny and Benny's like, yeah, my mother's spending a lot of money.

It's unbelievable. I love it. Dude, I love it. They're having a blast. A blast. And they're great guys. They're great guys. Phenomenal.

They came over the other day. The guy fed me a fig. He's, yo. I fed you a fig. This're great guys. Phenomenal. They came over the other day. A guy fed me a fig. He's, yo. Fed you a fig. This is true. Yo, there's a fig tree hanging over our backyard. Hold on. This is so funny.

You've seen this? This is concentrated Italian. I get fucking word that these guys are sawn. The Mexicans, who I love as well, are sawn with no drape. They're not shutting the doors. Oh, this is out there. So that's why everything's coated with fucking wood wood dust and i swear to god they're cutting with like a fucking router it's

just pulverized every wood it's every dust you're sitting on the edge of fucking wood dust which is fine but you're wearing all black it's gonna be a problem when you get up yeah when you get back so i get all fucking angry i'm like i, here's the story. Did I say this last week with the... No. Are you sleeping during the day? Oh, yeah. Did I say it? I don't think so. I heard you told me about this.

So I call him. He goes, I was like, when are you going to start? Because we got nothing. When are you going to start? And I called Anthony. And he goes, the plumber was A.S. today and nobody answered the bell. And I was like, why didn't you tell me the plumber's coming? I would have been up.

Yeah. And he goes, oh, yeah yeah it's nothing i talked to benny he said you guys are sleeping during the day so you you're just sleeping dude i'm in the gym right and i went what was that yeah my heart exploding my eyes are fucking lazy i don't answer the phone, did you? But I saw Anthony, bathroom guy. I'm like, this plumber's going to fucking hear it. So you, oh yeah, no, no, I'm just asking. So you all day long in the morning, you sleeping? I go, what are you, my fucking dad?

I'm going to sleep whenever I want to sleep. First of all. Secondly, just call me. Let me know when you're going to show up. If the plumber's showing up, I'll be up. I don't care if it's two hours of sleep on coke I'm gonna be up answer the door

for the fucking plumber out of respect so I call him I call him when I find out he's gonna be here he answers the phone and I was like hey

angry as fuck I'm ready to fucking give the biz a second time he goes I'm teaching Christopher about a fig we're pulling one

from the backyard my heart exploded in the other direction oh my god you should have seen this guy he walks into the backyard he's like six four by the way just really giant huge dude giant grabs he's like three whops on each other's shoulders robbing a bank the way he was pulling these figs up you know when you see like an elephant grab a branch? Yeah, like a brontosaurus. Rip everything off it. That's how this guy was moving. And then it literally just, it was straight up like planet Earth.

I couldn't reach him. They were too high. Dude, you and the six-four tag are just ripping figs off the tree. It's so fucking funny. He's teaching me how to rip them off. He's sitting up on his shoulder, hopped up like Yoda. Dude. Yoda's back.

An elephant feeding an autistic monkey a thing for the very first time. He's like, look at this. You're like, what? Yeah, so it got back in my heart. And then I talked to Benny a bit. It's just, you know, there's dust. Look at the mirrors.

There's dust on everything. Everything's got fucking dust. And they're no close to doing anything in there. The other cousin, another Italian, darker than, Jesus, holy shit, he's darker than any Latina I've ever seen in my life. Yeah. I asked him why. He's like, I was in Positano for six weeks.

I got six weeks a year. They all talk the same but different, and it is invigorating. Sure. You know? I'm hard the whole time. You got to be. He's telling me about this house his father built in sicily in the 90s and i'm just oh yeah just hearts blasting out of my fucking eyes he goes oh it's so hot it was like 90 degrees i'm like yeah i'm sorry about that he's got a wonky eye too when i say wonky this thing it's

oh really it's all the way over here too so i'm trying not to look at his fucking walk yeah yeah so once you're locked into the straight one you're you're you're it's obvious too you can't hide it your head has to totally shift like yeah all the way to the straight eye i've dealt with the sweetest guy in the world when you're not looking at the right eye but i think they've already they've went through this guy never adjusted his eye and dude it's not hold on can you tell which i am looking it's not off tilt like this it's like which eye am i looking at right now which eye am i looking at right now my my right damn yeah it's not that it's not that hard yeah also he's just so accustomed to it i think he built a callus for his wonk. You know what I mean?

Yeah. You got to build a callus for your wonk. Anyway, the guy's sweating all over the place. Mexie's fucking hitting the fucking saw wood, whatever. How many guys are working in here? There's two Mexicanos. Okay. Three Italianos.

Oh, man. Yeah. Everybody's ordering off the menu in this place. Just stinks in here. So. What the fuck? What the fuck was that? Yeah smell great no they don't italians are known for cologne anyway the advanced cologne fridge sit this doused in your car shout out bath and body works next sponsor this fucking ac was pumping at a certain rate and i was like yeah it's hot sorry we only have this one ac i gotta

shut the doors because you guys are blowing fucking dust all over my place yeah put a drop sheet down yeah that's the first thing you do he goes I'll tell you what how old is it and then he peeks through he sees it it's a dinosaur of an AC yeah he goes let me check something real quick pulls out the filter and he goes

Tom this is it this is why it's not pumping cold air and he goes you got a hose I was like yeah I got a it. This is why it's not pumping cold air. And he goes, you got a hose? I was like, yeah, I got a hose. He takes me in the backyard. And as he's cleaning the filter of RAC, that's how great this guy is. Yeah.

He's telling me romantic stories about his last visit in Sicily. And I'm staring at tomato plants to his right, which were growing. And I'm like, this is all I ever wanted. Yeah, goddamn. Just older Italians teach me how to live while they live the best life. I know.

Next to fresh tomatoes. What are we doing? Just spent six weeks in Positano. Positano. It's like one of those places, like, you can go there. Yeah. Yeah, what are you doing here? Not fixing your bathroom.

No, he's the electrician. So we got a plumber, the guys that are doing, he's the electrician. So we got a plumber, the guys that are doing the dirty work, electrician. And then Anthony oversees the whole kit and caboodle. You got the whole gauntlet in here. Yeah. Yeah. They stay for dinner or what?

If they didn't find... If they didn't... It's all about the dust thing. Otherwise, I wouldn't care. Well, that's just kind of nuts because it doesn't matter who you are. I mean, if you're doing anybody's bathroom, especially in a space like this,

it's the first thing you do is you put a job cloth down any time. Yeah. Literally the matter who you are. I mean, if you're doing anybody's bathroom, especially in a space like this, it's the first thing you do is you put a job cloth down anytime. Yeah. Literally the first thing you do. Also, the back door's right here. Yeah. You don't have to go down a couple flights. Yeah, yeah.

This is not a high-rise apartment. You could just cut it outside, yeah. Cut it all outside. Set up the fucking things. Yeah. And I said that to him today. I was like, by the way, there's an inch of dust

everywhere in my fucking apartment. He goes, I should have known that I... So you're like in the that i that's pretty good dude we had a wild we had a wild weekend wild weekend in chicago yeah we were where were we in seanburg we never even saw chicago yeah i've never seen i've never been to chicago oh really oh fuck yeah i know it sucked but i don't know where's sean it's like 20 minutes out yeah suburbs it was nice but like it was like anywhere else i could have been in fucking king of prussia you know it's a classic situation just there's the club and some mall and then there's a hotel next to it yeah yeah just an applebee's and fat weird tits yeah so where'd

you guys go after the show there's only one bar that was really open everything else we couldn't get a lockdown on what time this shit it was a lockdown i had the weirdest conversation with this dude yes dude you would have your fucking head would have exploded with this kid i was like i turned into i'm telling you like you ever see fucking i am legend when will smith starts freaking out at that man he's like you're fucking real You better... Is that when he's hunting deer in the middle of New York? Yeah, yeah. Dude, that was me with this fucking jerk-off at this head shop.

And I was just like... I was asking him the simplest questions. He just couldn't give me an answer. And he was like, what? And you... Chris knows. Dude, he was down on stage. Is this guy at the club?

He's a club manager? So we... No, no, no. This was like the... We went to a vape shop because we need to get cigarettes and vapes. That's mandatory, right? I was going to say we.

Shane needed some zen, I think. Yeah, it's zen. We were like... So we go to the nearest one. We walk in there. And Six was like, they'll have cigarettes, right? It's a smoke shop.

And I was like, yeah, probably. We walk in there. Six is like, do you guys have cigarettes? And he's like, no. That's his energy to energy to start yeah it's like all right oh yeah dude well bad like do you know where i can get the cigarettes he's like any gas station he's like oh all right well is there all three of you there no no it's just us two six is like well is there a gas station in this little strip mall?

He goes, no, go to the liquor store. It was like, dude, what is happening? I'm actually getting fired up. I'm thinking of you while this game is on. I wish fucking Tommy was here, dude. Meanwhile, I'm like, can I get a strawberry banana? Can I see all your fruit slash ice cream? Did I ask about the last call thing? yeah can I see all your fruit slash ice cream please yeah

did I ask about the last call thing yeah dude so then we're like we go I'm checking out and Six is trying to like

just pull this thing out of that ditch and uh he's like he's like what time what time do bars

close around here and the guy looks at him and he's like did you guys at any point say we're not from here? This is what he goes. This is exactly what he said.

He goes, you guys from out of town? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He goes, it's a fucking Western country. He goes, you should go to, go over to like Woodhaven or you go stadium pizza and grill. And we were just like, what time do the bars close?

It was a question. He couldn't tell me. He goes, I don't know that. I don't know when that is. I was like, I just slowly backed out. Can I ask a serious question? Was he in a wheelchair? No, dude.

He should have been. He stood. This kid. He looked normal. Like that. His brain was. Internal fucking anger towards everything and everybody it was it was insane if you're recently paralyzed no question he was yeah he was cutting this line where it's like i didn't it was hard to tell whether he was confused and we and he was just trying to give us like like like almost these

questions were putting him like under duress right right you know what i mean like he was being interrogated yeah for slapping his girlfriend yeah it's like dude we're on your side it's funny though what did she say dude we're leaving i was like i don't know what i expected i have a kid who was straightening a zigzag skateboard that's how you're like of course no idea what he's talking about but it still surprises you yeah it is simple questions yeah and then he's like you guys are out of town i'm like you waited till then to ask yeah i've already hit you with four out of town questions four out of town it was insane he couldn't just admit he didn't know when the bars closed yeah he had to like try to turn he's talking about it on stage i was in the

audience at one point because i was getting like good pictures on this one angle and while you're talking about i was like that mother Was pissing me off. Yeah, it wasn't even there that should sit with you for a while How'd you exit? The bush like Homer We went back to back Don't do it. Don do it just like what the fuck yeah

well did you get you got vapes and stuff yeah we got we got everything we went to the liquor store we got cigs and then we so there was no bar

in the strip joint the strip mall there was stadium pizza and grill which looked like a hell hole yeah it's alright do you rip the stadium pizza

and grill did we go there yeah no no there was this one place that the club kept on us like all the comics went there which is it was good the food there was amazing what happened every

night what happened he just pointed tell me what fucking happened every night open up so there we were like sitting at the bar and uh let's just keep let's set this up for thomas so please before we leave the club he'd get a fucking soup jar of- Whiskey? Oh. Yeah. You got to stop that from here. Dude, they didn't-

You slapped the fucking ice off? Stop. We were buying it for him. Dude, I don't watch stories because I'm afraid somebody else- Oh, man. I don't want to jump into somebody's story. I don't want to watch their story. I don't watch stories.

Yeah. I caught your post. Yeah. Shirtless jacked animal running around the back streets. It looked like you guys were in a cul-de-sac We were walking I need to answer that's cuz he rage quit the bar and I followed Sort of so good. No, they're saying like we would leave we left the club It was like I would say right before Shane would go on Every second show

That's when that whiskey would get dropped So it's not like he was pounding them all night He would wait He may as well He may as well start at noon All it takes is one Friday night They brought me three glasses He's a bourbon walker

You know white walkers? He has one bourbon He's a bourbon walker. You know white walkers? Yeah, dude. He has one bourbon. You see the shift, dude. He's in an alleyway just like breathing with his voice. We're sitting at the bar. Every other liquor,

I think he's fine. Yeah, really. This is the whiskey. Get you going. Dude, my eyes glaze over. It's crazy. You shift, man. You're like, I'm done with this one.

I'm like, it's clearly full. And he wants to fight everything. He'll fight a stop sign, which is probably why you had your shirt off. You were just looking for strangers on the street. No, I was sweating. No, it was hot. Dude, I thought the walk was going to be two minutes. It was like 20.

Yeah, it was pretty far. 20. Dude, it was so long. But anyway, the night before that. Friday night. Yeah, we go to the fucking like we go to the fucking we go to the bar and it's literally just us drinking beers and eating quesadillas yeah good food yeah food was amazing and some of the simple things jane and him jane and there was a girl sitting at the

other end of the bar and jane and him were like go ask her if you can buy her a drink yes and i'm like yeah i'm shit faced yeah at this point yeah and i'm like i'm not doing that you're like she's they're like she's right there we were hitting with a frustrated like dude if this chick looks over here one more time yes and i'd be trying to look at tv like dude you still here yeah dude we used to do this with another fucking animal growing up we literally talked this dude into beating this guy to almost to death jesus no no joke what you're driving in high school we're all fucked up leaving dermont field like where we used to drink yeah

i'm not gonna say his name but this dude was a legendary street fighter and we all knew like you could just rile him up doing nothing so we we pass. We're at this light. It's like a dog where you're like, ah! Yeah. Next to a train station. He starts running around the room. We're like, dude, these guys are looking at you, man. They're fucking looking at you. Me and D-Rock, Danny Reiner in backseat, egging on Billy.

He's fucking looking at you. Are you going to take that? And he's like, if he looks over one more time, I'm going to fuck him up. Immediately, we're like, he's like if he looks over one more time i'm gonna fuck him up immediately we're like staring at you well this kid wanted no smoke at first right he's like i'm doing a twix yeah he's just having ice cream with his mom he's having the nicest evening ever dude the car pulls up the car pulls dude he's just sitting like unwrapping his starburst like wrap him so tight this will be quick car pulls up it's been mobilized right at the train station and he rolls down the window he's like yo you fucking looking at me this dude in a bubble jacket oh true 90s piece of shit you know it's

a flat brim oh yeah earrings piece of shit him and his buddies two of them and he goes he goes what he's like are you fucking looking at me he goes nah bro i'm not looking at you the fuck he goes come here the dude walked the whole time every answer this guy said I was like holy shit holy shit

holy shit walks up to the door Billy smacks the door against him he goes I'm gonna fuck you up you wanna fight this is like

I had a sophomore year high school and the guy goes alright and I was like we're all like oh shit it's happening no Billyy goes i'm on

probation we got to fight down the tracks and this dude's like fuck you you want to fight me here fight me here fight me now and he goes no we got to walk down the tracks no no never go to a second billy takes off his jacket he's one of like four fucking studs. Billy's got a wife beater on. It's like 30 degrees in the winter. It's freezing. He's down the tracks. This dude's still going, nah, you want to fuck with me?

You fuck with me down here. He's trying to walk him back to the platform. We're all just like jerking off, waiting for this perfect moment of street justice. And then Billy just Terminator walks very slowly towards this guy. Walks up on the platform. Gets close where the guy like swings.

Grabs the inside of his jacket. Flips him over one of his legs. His head, this dude's head hit the concrete. And our, you could, it was like this shake. Yeah. In your feet. And then went. Just wrecked this dude.

So cars had to come up like flashing their lights and shit knock that shit off yeah jesus anyway what were you talking about what the fuck anyway yeah oh yeah i eventually like i'm like all right fine i'll do it yes i walk over there i like as i'm walking over there i'm like i don't i don't even know i don't have nothing to say i can't carry a conversation so i just i walk up and i lean in i'm like i was like can i buy you a drink she goes no let's emphasize the response time dude i don't think i was done watching doc holiday pull that gun on Johnny Ringo. That's how it was like. I was like, holy shit.

What just happened? Chris is sitting there. He got Ringo, dude. He got Johnny Ringo. Dude. Oh, my God. I immediately burst out laughing. Yeah. That's a good response.

I was laughing so hard. I don't think you stopped walking. You were just getting right back. I was laughing so hard. I don't think you stopped walking. You were just going to get a drink. All right, came right back. There was no stop. So did you have to pony up again and still look at the girl while you guys were all laughing? Pony up?

She worked at the club. She worked at the club. She was like one of the waitresses. We didn't. Yeah. Did you know? No, you didn't. She was sitting next to the one girl

i was talking to when we walked in about the club it's such a bees lie i knew what she had an improv shirt walk into that trap yes damn damn god damn so she was there the next night what so she was there next night or was this friday or saturday i don't know i never saw it i mean dude they have a ton of staff. That place is huge. So there's a ton of staff. She might even have been there. Yeah, there was 500 people that worked there.

It was like, hey, I need a drink. No, walked away. That's it. Dude, this rules. Yeah, it was pretty great. The way it sounded in my head is like she said no mid-sentence and I still just had to finish it. Yeah.

Can I get you a no, a drink yeah can I get you no a drink I'm just gonna say a drink can I give you I was gonna say a hundred dollars I got a hundred dollars in my pocket and you just pissed it away well what's fucked up is that then the next night I got pissed some kid was there a fan there just I could tell he was going to be a problem. And I was already tired as a wall. I was like, fuck this. I'm leaving. So we left.

It was almost the end of the night. Fucking next morning. Shane's like, dude, you guys missed it. Huge fight breaks out. This fucking dude cracks this guy on the bar, jumps off the deck. Cops get him in the fucking parking lot. Is this the same bar you guys were at? Yeah, we only went to one bar after because we didn't know what any time closing time was.

We didn't get an answer. I asked the crowd every night and they were like... Dude, it's insane. It's like Utah. It's all Mormons. It's crazy. I was like, isn't it a statewide thing? They're like, no. I'm not even sure that's true.

Who has county by county liquor laws? I don't know. Right? Yeah, I think it's just like... Isn't it a state liquor board? That's what I thought. i don't know right yeah i think it's just like the state liquor board that's what i thought i don't know though that's what i was saying and that kid looked at me like i was a fucking asshole i still walk into bars asking for six packs to go people are like what are you where are you from what year is that a weird thing yeah no apparently outside of pa it's a really weird fucking thing yeah that's that's yeah you can buy if you fucking bribe somebody i bought a bottle of liquor off a bartender yeah i mean at exorbitant price of course yeah it's three times that's coke for sure yeah at least 60 bucks for a bottle yeah i

get it at a wedding got a wedding guy to get all those guys yeah that's nice yeah well that's not his wedding catering guy yeah yeah your wedding caterer some of the funnest people you ever meet in your life yeah for obvious reasons and half of them are bombed anyway yeah so it's like all right yeah they're dipping in the in the fucking well yeah eighty dollars on a bottle of spice around one night oh you know what i did with it morgans yeah i don't know cat it was years ago it's my one of my one of our buddies who got married like almost right out of high school and it was just a shit we were all like fucking maybe 21 at that point so it was like none of us really had to act responsible so when we got to this wedding we were like this is gonna

be great a mess a mess immediately my one buddy and his girl leave they she goes to go get blow she fucking gets pulled over gets a dui he's gotta come back to do wedding pictures she's like she's not with him how many duis did you dodge dodge yeah there's one time that i cannot i thank god whoever robbed the fucking check cash in place on state street and media oh nice dude left me too yep i had one of these it was like it's your lucky day fucking police station too in media i was driving back and i just left this bar and i was uh i was soberish but i remember they pulled me over and i got out and they tried to do the one leg thing and immediately And immediately I said, I don't know why I said this.

I said, you know, I have an old hockey injury on my knee. So I don't know why I've never played organized hockey. I could have played any other sport. It's brilliant. I said hockey. And they're like, okay, would use that leg. I'm like, yeah, okay. And then I was, I was like hanging in there, but I was, it was a girl cop too.

And then the boys pulled up and then they could smell it. The worst was my friend's dad had just died he was in the fucking funeral home two blocks up she's drunk in the back seat screaming oh my my dad's dead he's in that house over there she's like they're like what actively i'm like yeah shut the fuck up no he died like two weeks ago so i'm like shut the fuck up, all you hear is like, I was like, yes. And she goes, give me your keys. You know you're getting out of this. I said, totally.

I went to fucking some shithole bar right after. And I walked in like we just won the state championship. Oh, my God. We did. It's the best fucking. Oh, my God. That's the best fucking film. Oh my God. That's the only one we won. That one time.

One time on Temple's campus happened to me. I like slow rolled through a stop sign. And in North Philly, it's like, it's like a story. You don't see cops here outside of meter mates. Yeah. There's no cops.

You'd have to side swipe. That's a good point. I don't think I've ever seen a cop. Yeah. You know, and they blow red lights. They go fucking 60 miles an hour down slow. It's fucking lawless.

It's lawless. You'd have to create havoc. I happen to be in front of a cop, slow rolling through a stop sign. He gets out. Lady's on the side. I've been drinking. He asked me if I'd been drinking. I was honest.

What time is this at? It's probably about 10 p.m. We're on our way somewhere else on Spring Garden. It's not that. But white boy in that campus too. Later it gets later. Maybe it's probably about 10 p.m we're on our way somewhere else on spring garden it's not that but white boy into in that campus too is later it gets maybe it's what yeah so he pulls me over he's like you have you drink tonight i was like yeah i probably had like two three beers a couple hours ago i lied about the timing but i told him the truth instead of just lying he goes all right yeah and then i should have but at the same I was like, maybe if I go the opposite.

No, the opposite never works. The same thing. Yeah. There's nothing better. Over there, too. That's good. Your odds are way better over there. And he literally listened to it.

And they're speaking in codes I don't fucking know. I just see him look at his partner over the hood of the car. And then he's like, looks back at me, goes, it's your lucky day. Stop running fucking stop signs. Yeah. And I was like, hey. at me and goes, it's your lucky day. Stop running fucking stop signs. Yeah. And I was like, hey. Yeah. It's coming everywhere.

Unbelievable. Dude, it's a great feeling. The only one that I truly, my best friend growing up, Andrew Rom, he had like a IROC-Z or a Trans Am or some shit. Sick. And he was smoking weed out of a bowl while driving. And we pass like a trooper that's like hidden yeah and the trooper pulls us over on garden state parkway on our way to c aisle and that was the biggest

fear i've ever felt in terms of at that age i was like oh shit yeah i've heard about duis because my brother yep never been in one if we gotta get towed what county are we in in jersey we're already in south jersey yeah we're right the destination is right fucking there yeah dude he's blowing a bowl place fucking stinks obviously we're smoking weed smoking at night too is this was on the way i think this was like dusk i think it was like five six o'clock It's the most conspicuous. You can see that from two miles away. Like that flash.

It's like smoking crack. And the flicker down. It's like, dude, I don't know what's happening in that car, but it's bad. Yeah. You're in a two-seater. Yeah. Nobody's thinking it's a cigarette. Yeah.

You see a flicker of a flame. I like those dudes who have the cigarette thing, too. They're like, totally. It's like you're holding the lighter up to it for three minutes you fucking idiot no one thinks it's a butt fucking retard oh the one hitters yeah yeah yeah cigarette anyway dude let us go and i was like dude down the shore what would have happened yeah you know you're in high school you're talking car is getting fucking towed. Yep.

You're at a local place where your father has to travel an hour and a half. At least. Oh, my God. I'm legally not allowed in. I don't think I'm still illegally allowed in Ocean City, New Jersey. What'd you do? Senior week. We racked up so many underages.

And there was a summer that was a summer. They initiated a thing called a party patrol where these fucking younger cops would dress up like us. And they walk up like, yo, you guys party in. As long as they get the invite in. That's the invite. We would see him coming a mile away because they're like, hey, what's up? Oh, my God. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. and like what's the space of the skateboard yeah exactly young fellas they got us one night and the problem was we used to always use a alias and this is where the name ed reynolds if you hear that pop up when i say that's from us using a name for the ocean city cops because we're all under 18 so we'd be like ed reynolds edward reynolds eddie reynolds one night there was like four ed reynolds

in the ocean city police department we're in separate rooms i didn't know this so i look over i see my buddy nick he's like i'm like shit he's like we're like three ed reynolds yeah that's crazy finally they're like all right here's the deal because i remember they called to like uh they knew i was my parents had a place in wildwood like my dad knows all the cops on there so got back to him my dad's like here's the deal you're never allowed back in ocean city we're not paying them but i was like what is it like 80 bucks he was like it was like 74 for every ticket you got yeah and you've been racking them since fucking early june this early september it was like four thousand dollars we. We all owed. And they were just like,

you just don't show your face here ever again. Because they got all our real names. They're like, don't ever come here again. I was like, fuck this place. It's a dry town. You think I'm not Andy Reynolds? Yeah. Who is fucking Brian Six?

My first fake... That sounds like a fake. It does. It does. You do have a fake name. I know. We know you're not Eddie Reynolds. What's your real name?

Brian Six. God damn it. Brian Two. Yeah. One forever underage. I bet. What are we at? Seven now?

Dude. Yeah, these are good. My first fake ID was, his name was Anthony Philip Ninfo III. What? And it was a real ID that my buddy Anthony Cermonera, Tony Cermonera, shout out, both of these degos, gave me. He found it at like a college. It was a freshman year college. And he hands it to me.

He's like, here, this looks like you. And I was like, no, it doesn't. So every bouncer I'd hand it to, they'd read it and ninfo the third and i'm like yeah and then you just memorize the address and i gotta fucking bang that must have been a rough life yeah yeah the pride of that family yes it's big it was great it got me in the fucking all the, you know, like old city bars. Yeah, dude. I found a knuckling extravaganza. I found an idea in the Xerox machine my freshman year. Whoa.

Guy was making fakes. I don't know. I guess. Well, that's exactly what he's doing. Wait, what? Where at? He's at Drexel Library. Oh, yeah.

Oh, maybe it was Xeroxing it for like. Yeah. For like the bursar's office or something. Of course he was. Yeah, yeah. Oh, maybe it was Xerox in it for like. Yeah. For like the bursar's office or something. Of course he was. Yeah, yeah. What are you going to do with a Xerox? Did you have a fake guy, though? What?

We had a fake guy on campus. There was years to come up here. I remember years ago, people were like, dude, go up to New York. Yeah. And then we found out, it's like, well, you live in Philly. I'm like, they got him there? They're like, do you have a Chinatown? It's like, oh, okay.

Yeah. Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah, yeah. My brother would be like, go to Chinatown, you fucking idiot. They're everywhere. I'm like they got them there they're like do you have a chinatown it's like oh okay yeah oh i didn't know that yeah yeah i yeah like go to chinatown you're fucking idiot they're everywhere like oh dude i mean getting a fake id to me was like the same as like trying to start stand up you're like i don't even know how to yeah who's the first person you talk to about that i have no idea you just walk around like like buying fucking this is why having a bipolar older brother that's an absolute psychopath was came in handy yeah all his buddies had access to everything we should stand outside of huawei asking people to get us like six packs at the bar across the street that's wild you just

wait for some dude it looks a little shifty carpenter jean shorts all the way past bigger the keychain yeah on the bingo bango dude we do you got a fucking yeah dude you get like a medieval dungeon keeper coming out like dude that guy's gonna get us a case if you got a set of keys it looks like you run a school that motherfucker will get you booze he's got a beer ball in his pickup like yes yeah that's our guy yeah we full-on in high school we went full-on with the just like we found our oldest looking friend and he would go into the liquor store and yeah buy booze and then he just became like a regular. Yeah.

So like he never got ID. Our buddy who was black. It's Johnny. They would never question the black dude. It was funny. And we picked up on it. He's like, dude, they'll never call me. He just kept going.

And there's one place. But if he was black, there's a chance he was probably 55. He might have been. He never had another actual age. I think he did have cotton disease. He could have been 87. I don't know. You never know, dude.

You never know. And then when they get to 55 you're like are you 18 how is this working god damn you're gorgeous for a pop-pop you're a beautiful pop-pop green it's good lighting what it's good lighting in here no no i'm saying well it's like are you complimenting your own lighting? No, their skin is. Oh, yes. It doesn't reflect shadows as well. Dramatically. Yeah.

You know? Good lighting in black homes. Imagine, yeah. Here's also something you don't tell a black girl you want to pick up on. No, no. Your face says good lighting. Where? No, like everywhere.

Yeah. Let me see your butthole i'll say the same thing good lighting it doesn't what's true though yeah sure it's a big problem because on film you got to light white people and black people different yeah did you ever get caught with anybody your boys get caught with one they're like i'm gonna keep this they keep it yeah yeah i got i lost one really i eventually lost that nympho one yeah did they just they keep it they didn't they didn't go it just depends it's like it's like any bouncer like or fucking toll booth operator yeah or secretary or it's their decision that day if they want to be an absolute pile of shit or not

and it's how you behave but if i was i was normal you know. Giving the signs of like, thank you so much, man. Yo, hell yeah. Like the song. Yeah. Just being a fucking weird 20-year-old, 19-year-old. Yeah. And this guy was like, fuck you. Just like bullying, you know? I'm going to keep this.

If it's really you, come back with a second ID. Yeah, yeah, no. I feel like they have to get a certain amount of people. Yeah. You know what I mean? Just to give the appearance of propriety delco dude it's not a fucking velvet rope club where they have to show i know but it's just like i'm definitely in like college towns and stuff like if they if they didn't let everyone who's under 21 and i feel like it would decimate

their account yeah oh yeah they wouldn't be in business yeah they have to sell a redheaded buddy here in astoria he's a bouncer in midtown really or maybe east village whatever and he palm he's get he gets palmed hundred dollar bills right without even youngsters youngsters yeah like a hip place like a cool spot yeah cool spot really yeah there's a line forever people come up there's no id checks like just gets a fucking it makes like seven eight hundred hours a night just fucking security barstool's got that now the barstool bar that's like the only bar i think i could see nowadays there's an actual line around the corner we're that one place where i go see from the solfitel what's that one club it's been there for years yeah it's like uh always a line though it's like right connected to that

like cbs oh yeah yeah that's a club there's always a fucking yeah there's like a there's like a there's like a neon sign that goes like this well blue martini no no it's i forget what the fuck it's like pink rendezvous or something yeah it has a neon sign that does this non-stop yeah my first uh i worked as a bartender for one year when i had a full-time job yeah because uh um uh the public house on our 18th and arch and when it first opened there was a there was a line around the block it was like the place to be i walked in there one time at like lunch three people i went to college with worked there one guy was behind the bar one was a manager one was like somebody else and um yeah that place was popping dude it was so fucking fun yeah and then out of nowhere the one lady is like i had a full-time job i was working

at deloitte as an it consultant and i didn't need this job but i wanted to be part of this environment because it was so wild and i literally worked the door as a doorman for like three months because the line to get an application to be a bartender from professional bartenders was so long they're like you at least have to play the game for a bit you work the door for three months then you can bartend and then i bartended and they gave me like shitty shifts like wednesday afternoon yeah yeah thursday night i'd never get friday prime time until like six months in right and i got dude it was so fucking fun they were shooting rocky the newest rocky there and uh paulie comes in while I'm serving lunch on Wednesdays you come in yeah he would come in every every Wednesday for lunch

so I know this is supposed to be at your other job no it's like maybe wasn't Wednesday it was a Wednesday night yeah like it like post shift like 7 a.m. yeah set fry I got a for I got a Saturday afternoon shift that's all confusing thanks I'm gonna go grab some lunch and work at a bar for no pussy and no money just do an old decrepit rocky star oh yeah but he was the fucking man the hell have you been every yeah he came in like because they only shot for like a few months but yeah yeah yeah i saw him like four or five six times total and he was the fucking man dude yeah he was the man and that place was nuts place was like god damn it was so fun dude i don't know how you were were you a good bartender no okay no no did you know drinks like what you

were doing as far as not really because i the pressure was like it was mostly beers but the cocktails that they actually had on because they're young they're young adults like they're young professionals so they were spending money for cocktails but was it like mostly and drinks just like vodka this is like 2007 2006 yeah i feel like cocktails weren't in yet no they definitely were because i had a problem with cock said cocktails it wasn't just like vodka soda there was like you had to memorize in fact that's why i got fired so here's how i got fired i was so confident in my position because i didn't give a fuck and everybody was like rooting for me or whatever yeah one day out of nowhere we got a surprise visit from like the owners or something we're gonna

we're gonna do a test of the menu i was told to test the menu with dog shit the night before i'm out with said bartenders getting fucking ripped doing nose beer somewhere yeah just having a great time fucking in coke closets and i'm sitting at the edge of the bar acting like it's no big deal and they're like yo the test started and everybody else is in this like gathering room and i'm like yeah all right well just give me the fucking test i'll take it and they were actually asking like ingredients for certain dishes certain cocktails and i made a mockery of it so much so that i'm hammered on the edge of the bar drinking beer on everybody else and i'm like who gives a shit i didn't give a shit because i had a job yeah i didn't give a fuck i didn't know they were gonna fire me on the spot what the fuck i got fired on the spot in the stool

my friend who got me the job to begin with from drexel that i went to school with was like hey man uh so sorry i like the idea the owner the owner like opens a beer for you yeah this is your last fight this one you're paying for because you don't work here yeah just fired me like i'm so sorry but you gotta you gotta get out of gravy but god damn that bar rules standard so happy i did you know what i mean dude my one buddy wanted to be a bartender so bad down the shore because he was like dude so much pussy but we're like you're a loser dude no that's also a very hard job to get it is and it's like passed down and most guys do that because a lot of them are like teachers and then they take the summer off or they had the

summer off and they come down there and do it i mean it's tough to get into those jobs my buddy got into it and i was like you've never bartended in your life he was like dude they'll start me off at like service bar bob i go it's the summer in north wow you have no idea there is no service bar yes dude we went the first night this kid was like what's in it dude that's me 100 we were paying for people's drinks we're like go up and just order this we are looking at the menu 30 70 greens and make sure you ask that kid right there the one ringing his t-shirt out behind the bar i love that statement in the weeds dude never forget we were in the corner and watching him yell at the two girl bartenders who were crushing it obviously

trying to get him away and he's like i don't know what's in it what was the mixer he's like i will say this every bar that's successful like that has like two hot bartenders they're good the girls they work 20% they're on a different level but it's purposeful obviously guys come every day there's regulars just to stare at their

breasts or whatever it's just fucking weird perverts that would spend a couple hundred bucks and you get tipped out because you'd share tips like anyone but they're not running that's pretty cool that would spend a couple hundred bucks and you get tipped out because you'd share tips like anyone. Like anyone. No, I'm sorry. But they're not running. That sounds pretty cool.

What I'm saying is it's not a couple hundred bucks. It's not pedal to the metal. They're not running full power like your friend in the fucking weeds. No, he stayed. No, they're like, hey, Mark.

Then they sit there and talk. How was your day? And they lean over. What did you get At a Jameson again Then she takes 20 minutes To get a Jameson Meanwhile you're juggling

Fucking eight bottles And nobody's Nobody's criticizing their drinks No they can't If there's a guy bartender They're like this guy Better be fucking good Meanwhile the guy gets

The drink she made And he's like It's good It's good Thanks so much Oh wow what did you You put your own little spin on this. What's in this, gas?

You give me a fucking fastball, Veronica? Put your tits back in and make it real. Piece of shit-ass old bitch. That's why I always respected the old school alcoholics that come on the door when the sun's up. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. It's business time. Yeah.

There's no farting around. You know what I mean? When the sun goes down, you time. Yeah. There's no farting around. You know what I mean? When the sun goes down, you got to get the fuck out. Yeah. You check out. If you're here just for booze, I don't want loud music. I want to listen to my own depressing thoughts. I want my man to give me, or lady, to give me the cocktail perfectly as I wish.

And I want to have an open, intimate conversation with said bartender because that is an experience and a relationship that you can't get anywhere else. No. You you're gonna tell that man more than you tell your diary or your wife yeah that's a fucking fact you'll find it you'll never see a guy in that position any tits out dude he wants to see saggers on the bar old jane dude a hundred percent yeah let's hear about her shitty family yes or a guy who's in his position as well who's gonna be on the other side of that he wants a lady that if things go a little bit sideways, he might be able to score. Dude, her hair has been perm since birth.

If it's like 4 p.m. And all you hear in the background is like. Yeah. And he's just drying a glass. And all of a sudden you're like like you ever date somebody with a lisp and then he will lock in and you'll have the greatest 45 minutes of conversation of your life dude bartender relationships are so fruitful yeah i'm so grateful you find the right one yeah it's got to be good though it's very specific and it's dude mostly the old

shitheads. When I was like growing up or going to the bars and my, my parents went to, they were the best ever. They were the best ever. Best food you'll ever get in your life. Disgusting. I don't want to know what's in it.

God forbid. One more thing I'll say about this. It's like, this doesn't taste like anything. They don't even have a kitchen. This is a chicken cheesesteak. Just eat it. I'm like,

it's pretty good the bartenders in delco still out of respect have like older gentlemen yeah when i say old i mean look there's 60 year olds i went to this place in in springfield there's four old men four when it's hot like when it's fucking friday night four old gray balding men. They're all blind. It's like, it's like, I like those kinds of bars where it feels like, I don't know, whoever owns this place is like committing a crime.

Nobody's busy. He's just put four geezers in there. It's a, I may even call the bar that he's talking about. It's a pure indicator of, of the degenerative attitude towards this, the environment like it's a drunk town right yeah so true drunks if you're a good bartender it's not about like connecting with somebody individually it's seeing all the volumes if you're down to a real drunk a guy that like it

works it like a fucking business you get down to two to three drink two two to three sips you better be asking me if i want another or backing me oh yeah without asking anything yeah those guys will peruse their drink before they walk in you're just loading them up what time is it i don't know were you at the stanley cup a hundred percent are you next to i goldberg nailed it suck my dick dude i goldberg that was next to the that's the bar i told you i called i knew a bar he's unbelievable he's at springfield and four old guys on his business I told you I called. I Goldberg. That was next to the Stanley Cup. That's the bar. I told you I called. I knew a bar. It was at Springfield and four old guys on its business. Dude, that place.

If we weren't so far away. They're going to be an atomic bomb. That place will still be standing. There's no windows. It is. It's a white box next to I Goldberg. You wouldn't know where it's at. No.

It's on Baltimore Pike. It's a legendary spot. Wait, hold on. It's still open. I know. It's crazy, dude. I've only been in there like twice. I went there not too long ago. Both. Wait, hold on. It's still open. I know. It's crazy, dude. I've only been in there like twice. I went there not too long ago. Both times for, you know.

To use the restroom. I think I have been to this place. There's no way. No way, dude. There's no fucking way. I mean, maybe. Honestly, if you did. Who would take you there?

Yeah, why would you be there? My buddy whose dad was like a like lifelong flyer season ticket holder we like went to a game once and we went to some fucking place after the game maybe i'm thinking of somewhere else but that would be a weird drive to go from the stadiums to there i'm thinking of this like it almost looks like it's like an all-white like beach house kind of looking thing almost it's in like south philly it's like near that springfield it's near that chicken pizza or whatever oh i know but i've been to somebody's house no no it was a bar it was a stinky old bar apparently the flyers used to go there and shit that's well there's a place called rexy's over in

jersey that's where all the flyers yeah that's where you shit. Well, there's a place called Rexy's over in Jersey. That's where all the Flyers used to go. That's where they used to get hammered. That's a place that burned down, right? Yeah, that was a place where they'd get fucking plastered and go to the games. I gotta check time. Yeah, we gotta do... DraftKings, baby.

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See show notes for details. I'm going to start gambling, dude. Dude, football season gambling is the fucking best. You've been doing the parlays. Yeah, but I did that shit. Oh, come on. Saturday's nice. Let's talk about it.

We're going to the Notre Dame, Ohio State game. Yeah, dude. And the games that are, because the game, Ohio State and D is until 730. We got a full day starting at noon of good fucking games. They're not creeping into the season. It's like fucking bam. It's like, what the fuck?

It's going to be weekend at Tommy's. You guys are going to be holding me through the whole Notre Dame game. You're going to get some Calypso music pretty quick, dude. What a difference, though. The last game we were at was Florida State. Yes. It was also opening day. The beautiful babies.

Yeah. We were going to fucking Ohio. Ohio State opening day. Another team that does not like Notre Dame. Women look like drywall. It's tough, dude. Okay. Well, let's see.

Yeah? Ohio State. They bust them in from somewhere else. Yes. All right. It's the cream of the crap from the whole Midwest. Didn't Ohio State get fucked up by like Perks and Oxys? That sounds great.

Oxys fucked that state up, dude. That sounds great. I didn't know it was gonna be this too I'll take it dude yeah what do you what do you think we should do

yeah I wonder if DraftKings should put out a bet on whether we're gonna drink Friday I'm not gonna drink Friday I already told you I'm gonna use it as my day off

there's no fucking way I'm coming in Friday I'll grab you by your fucking nose and we're gonna wait you're gonna come in on Friday yeah

alright well then if I can I'll oh a couple i actually might get thursday just you guys got shows wednesday what just come out yeah i might you're like i'm leaving drinking during the day last friday we had shows what saturday it's past saturday oh that was fun though that was fun exactly like six beers you came all the way around there's a lot of weak pores in chicago a lot of weak pores come on he was blacked out no he was just doing that thing it's like i feel like a drunk mom would say you'd be like damn dude you're doing another one for lunch you'd be like it's a weak pore yeah it's my dad poor. Yeah.

It's my dad's excuse. Kids put nothing in it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude, even though I'm leaving, I'm like, fucking, why don't you show that? I got to take a nap. When are we going to Chicago? The fucking bartenders we knew growing up, they would give you like, we called it a fastball. Yeah, yeah. A week poor.

You get a pint glass. You'd be'd like you know tequila and something yeah it'd be 80 tequila and they think they're doing you a favor it's like this is terrible dude stop doing this to me not only am i seeing sideways i don't like taste like fucking oh it's brutal yeah but you still drink it at the same pace as like a yeah because people are looking at you i know anything that comes in a pint glass, I drink at beer speed. Yes. It doesn't matter what's in there.

That's a good point. It's fucking ridiculous. That's a funny. Dude. It's like. It's. I do the same thing. You know how they do that thing where they have like a soup bowl and they're like, they're

filling it from the bottom and people just like keep eating the soup. Yeah. That's literally what that shit's like. I just throw it down. Yeah. I was doing that. It's weird because I got the small glasses this weekend. They didn't have the pint ones for those drinks.

And I was drinking them normal. Then the minute she'd bring in a pint glass, I was like, God, it's gone. Dude, also, what a great way to stop drinking is that you had to fill up a shot glass of beer every time. Just so your boys could see how many shots I had. It's a shame another one

you gonna do another shot class are you sure don't you got stuff to do tomorrow you got a flag football game it doesn't

yo I love it cause it was you guys kept bringing it up and I was like let's pump the brakes remember

when it's us three out and I get to host that's 10 minutes I'll go up there fucking backwards you got nothing to worry about. I was fucking high as shit on those shows. He told me you were high as fucking.

He crushed. Because I just didn't give a fuck. The wheels were off. What do I give a shit? It was so funny. I came out. I was like, first of all. He's like, I'm only going to smoke half this thing.

He forgot he was smoking a joint. So he just huge drags off this thing. Smoking it like a cigarette. All right. Here's what happened. Every breath. Crystal's listening. Save it for the page. I gots off this thing. Smoking like a cigarette. All right. Here's what happened. Every breath. Crystal's listening.

Save it for the page. I got to piss. Okay. Oh, this is good. I'll tell it on the page. Good cliffhanger for the page. What? It's a good cliffhanger

for the page. Yeah, dude. It's good.