Stuff Island - Stuff Island #50 - excuse me, mrs. berrymore? w/ Josh & Jacob Wolf

Episode Date: October 20, 2022

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You're on acid and you go and you're like what is up and they're quiet Afternoon and then just kind of wrote it out through the show Shows that's right. Well, dude, what's bad? No good Yeah, really? How soon do you ask? I could see it potentially being better than booze a day of booze in potentially Don't work for me at all. No. You put the mic closer. You think you're not on?

Oh, I can hold on. You just said Drew Barrymore. You know they didn't teach you anything? They actually had a mic on my body. Oh, they're professional. What we can do. We'll tell her to go fuck off. And we don't do that shit here.

Yeah. We like to say here, it's stuff I would fuck through Drew Barrymore. Stick it back. Put a little fucking in a flash. I don't give a shit. Listen,

you know, I take mushrooms a lot. Yeah. I got some to-go favors. You know, I should give you cupcakes. I'll give you a bar of mushrooms. I'm on board for that.

Yeah. Way better to-go favors, by the way. I think he likes acid. It depends on the acid. I've done the liquid. You got the haircut for a guy who needs acid. Exactly.

I mean, I did the liquid acid when I was in high school. Like, and I watched him. In high school? Yeah, when I was 18. That acid trip I told you where I was up for almost three days straight. That one. Dude, can I tell you. I was up for a whole weekend when he was gone.

When he left, I dropped. And by the time he came back Sunday around 3 p.m. I was awake and then I was asleep within the next hour I'd been up you all weekend. I Asked him one day I go. Hey, I Need some more stories for stage. Yeah He said to me, you made like a plea deal. You have indemnity. That's what I told him. He just pulls out money.

He's like, 200? He's like, you don't want this money. It's four hundred bucks. He told me, he was like, you won't get in trouble for any of this. And I was like, are you sure? And he said to me, yeah he goes all right he goes that I'd every tell you by the time when you and mom were out of town and I had some friends over and we did acid and I go no I go let's hear this story and he goes okay all I'm gonna tell you

is that when I woke up the next morning the pizza guy was still here and I was like, oh my God. Wait, what? Yeah, so what did happen? Yeah, they ordered pizza and he stayed. Yeah, what had happened is, here, this dude. Where did you buy, were you by yourself or with friends? No, I was with a bunch of friends. Oh, okay. This dude, you were by yourself, I'm like, hold on. Yeah.

This dude shows up. This dude shows up to the house. He still lives at the house. Yeah, yeah, he still lives. Oh yeah. He showed up to the house and was like, you guys look like you're having fun. I go, yeah, just a bunch of high school kids doing drugs drugs and apparently that was his invite to quit his job and stay the night

I woke up the next morning. It was like Joe man I was a hey great party last night. I go one you were not invited to now get out of the fucking house How old was this dude? I asked him. I probably just under 30 like 65. Yeah. He definitely was the kind of guy who made the decision to quit his minimum wage job and go party with a bunch of high school kids. So you're quitting every future job. You're hanging out with high school kids. Yeah, exactly.

And with fucking acid. Especially if you're doing acid with high school kids, you basically like, I don't need to be in society. No, he's waiting for somebody's pickle to fall out of their pants. basically like, I don't need to be in society. No. He's waiting for somebody's pickle to fall out of their pants. He's giving up already. That guy was looking for a little favor. I mean, he is a pizza delivery guy.

It's not like he worked at like fucking. I know. But didn't Mr. Ho Schwab. He's on the edge of society already. That's a good point. He's not like, well, if my pizza guy finds out about this, I'm fucked.

That is a very specific decision to go, for sure. Oh, hang around and not do nothing. Also, by the way, when he was not invited to stay,

we did not invite him to stay. He just kind of came in. I mean, I will say, on multiple occasions when a pizza guy has come over

and they are like somebody my age or a little older, come on, base hit. That's run number one. Sorry, guys on base it that's that's important for me if you're wondering whether we're rude to our guests. Yeah, fuck you, Drew Barrymore.

You can get some, too. Tommy develops Tourette's on this episode. Yeah. Go! Go! No, but I feel like that's a very specific decision that is not a good decision. Right? I mean, like, that guy.

Wait, so you didn't, no one invited him in? No. Okay, well, this is what I'm getting to. There have been separate occasions where i've seen a kid my age who was delivering pizza and usually when i'm ordering pizza with friends we're all smoking weed and so sometimes i'll invite the pizza guy in i'm like hey do you want do you want a boner like come in he takes a boner and he's like all right cool and then he leaves i was on a different kind of drug so i didn't really it didn't really register that he had decided to kind of stick around after his bong rip and then eventually I was like well he hasn't killed anybody yet and he's nuts and he has not rude he's not breaking anything he's he's kind of respectful so in my drug state I was like alright this is a step too far you gotta get the fuck out of here it's a great time

though and I'm like dude I don't give a fuckogen? Like, you're more of a booze dude, right? I'm trying to get into more hallucinogenics. It doesn't figure a person out. It does. I have some extra acid in my back. My friend has got me doing weed. I do like three puffs of a sativa roll. Yeah. He smoked two joints and bought some incense.

Yeah. Now he's lighting incense in the house. I mean, the socks he's wearing, like, he's really jumped into the counterculture. Imagine if he's a fucking pothead. That would suck so hard. I would fucking suck, dude. And you started saying some wild shit. I'm like, Chris, that's not nice, man.

Let the guy live. Just take it easy, dude. Just take it easy, man. Way more of a booze coke. A hundred percent. You think I'm stopping here? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Why do you think that that here is your hair can i tell you something when i saw him was it monday i saw you at the airport yeah you saw me monday at the airport okay when i saw him monday at the airport my wife and i love time yeah and i and i really have an affinity for him like i i i have a like a little bro he feels like my little brother yeah and so when i saw him at the airport i looked like your papa i was like and i called my wife i go hey remember young handsome she goes yeah i go he doesn't exist he has. Dude. Yo, you look 15 years younger today than you did on Monday.

Well, I slept 15 hours. Yo, sleep helps a lot. I was literally, I'm like, Tommy might be dead when we're in New York. I don't know. He's aging at such a crazy rate. Oh, dude. And. I was hoping your wife had, I thought she was on the flight with you.

And she would have started crying. You're friends with this guy? No, I know her. How do you know that? If she had seen Tommy looking like that, she would have, the mother in her would have been like, what can I do to stop you from dying?

Yeah. Maybe we take a different flight to a different place in Nevada for about three months. We'll drop you there. Let's talk about this motherfucker real quick. So we took the same model that I told you kept me up until noon.

Yeah. And I took it, it was like a 14 hour trip. Five of it was cool. The other seven or whatever. That's 12 hours. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

Yeah. Nine was hell. I just flipping and rolling, walking around the fucking room like I was on acid. But I wasn't. The high was gone, but my head and heart were exploding. I text Chris at like six in the morning.

I'm trying to get a read from Chris and Shane, who also took it. And I was like, yo, I'm still flying, dude. Like, what is going on? And I was like, I can't sleep. He goes, never again. Yeah. I'm not doing this ever again.

Yeah, me too. I can't sleep either, period. I'm in Denver. And I was like, yo, what the fuck? The dude left Skankrest to go to Denver. What happened? I can't sleep either period I'm in Denver I couldn't leave the room let me go to an emperor yeah security You rode on that? Dude. In a metal tube? Dude. It was a little wild. This is what happened. What the fuck? But I'm going to need the break, maybe an hour before you decide to leave, what's happening?

Dude, I was in my hotel. First of all, I love the mountains. I love that flight. The flight to Vegas, going from Denver to Vegas, I'm looking out the window the whole time. Just like, I want to be in that. I want to look like that flight like the flight to Vegas going from from Denver to Vegas I'm looking out the window the whole time just like I want to be in that I want to be in that I want to Be like a special needs eight-year-old I'm just looking down there being like, oh I wish I was just in that what like I love like the Southwest makes me crazy. And it's part... I wish I was in there. I wish I was in there.

Okay. Dude, because I... Okay, so a couple years ago... Climbing a fucking wall in the Grand Canyon. A couple years ago, I was doing stand-up in Denver, and I met this girl, and then, like, I went back to Philly, then flew back out to Denver, and she took me, like, through the Rockies, all these hikes. Dude, I'm like, I was to Philly, then flew back out to Denver. And she took me like through the Rockies,

all these hikes. I do. I'm like, I was in bad shape, but still like running through the mountains with her. Like, Oh, it was amazing. You're trying to show your peacock. Dude. Yeah. There's no way I'm pulling up. Yeah. Yeah. So then I'm not like, can we walk? It's like, I'm gone. Yeah. Yeah. And then she took me to like Moab. She took me to like all these places. So anytime I see that now, I just have like these like crazy romantic feelings about it. So then I get back to my room. I'm flying on Molly.

This is probably one 32. And, uh, I don't know what to do, but I like, I can't leave this room too. Cause I was on the strip just like, it's just like out of my mind. And the gold, gold nugget casino. I don't know this room do because I was on the strip just like it's just like out

of my mind and the gold golden nugget casino I don't know if you've ever been inside that it's like letting all the animals out of the zoo it's not chill yeah by the way that's what like if if if certain group of people walk into the cosmo and they're like you guys should go to the golden nugget yeah like that's who's at the golden nugget. People who they don't let in the other hotel. Imagine like a rhino with a neck tattoo. That's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bedazzled genius.

That's right. Yeah. A fucking hippo and bedazzled genius. Did you bedazzle your true religion genius? Yeah. Most of them come bedazzled now. That's what I'm saying. Which is strange. So I'm in my room. I'm like like what can I watch to chill me out I'm thinking

about the mountains I turn on Ken Burns National Parks documentary just like an idea how depressed he gets he's like this will cheer me up yeah yeah yeah watch Ken Burns talk me out of this hell and dude like the first the first eight minutes the first eight minutes of the ken burns national parks documentary gets me fired the up even if i'm not even if i'm sober dude meanwhile i'm just watching xxnx trying to get a load off that's my ken burns. Zero support. Trying to just drain the cysts. Yeah, just trying to get some energy out. Yeah. This is going to get the extra 1% molly out of my nuts. Yeah, and then, like, so I see this,

I see the first eight minutes of that documentary, and I'm just like, I got to fucking, I got to go. I have to go. I'm right here. And, like, I'm busy the next couple weeks. I was like, I'm never going to, when else am I gonna be able to do this skank fest has been awesome I'll skip out the last day I'll be in the mountains so I just immediately just start booking flights I booked a flight that was leaving at I think 5

a.m. get just get an uber I like just throw everything in my bag getting an uber go to the airport. Security was hell. Security was absolutely hell. When you're going through security and you're showing your ID and you're just going like this. I wasn't, see, I wasn't going like this. I was just like a gog, like everything, like the lights were so intense and I was like really enjoying everything. That was the weird thing is like even the conveyor belt for the bags and shit. I was like, you know, listening extra hard to that. Dude, I was like, and trying to avoid making it obvious, like how much I was enjoying the system a little bit, but like, I mean, anyone

trying to talk to me, it was like a nightmare, but I like kept it together, got on the plane, taking off was sick. Like the rush of taking off was crazy and then yeah who was sitting next to you and do you think they had any idea i'm trying to remember i was sitting i was sitting between two girls your middle seat yeah it was rough leaning over the one girl to look out the window at your no no no it was nighttime it was nighttime i could you couldn't see anything i i went I had the neck pillow on and I managed to pass out for a little bit. Woke up as we were landing

and was like, fuck. I'm in Denver. I'm in Denver. What the fuck am I doing in Denver? That's why I tried to beat off. Just to eliminate any bad decision. Especially flying the fuck in Denver.

Although also jerking off on ecstasy sounds like a bad decision I'm just trying to see what I didn't know I was into. Yeah, you were like, maybe I'll try this. Maybe this will do it. Are you porn? Yeah. Dude, we'll do it. You're blending the motions.

Little shampoo, little body, little conditioner. Yeah, you take your body moisturizer out. You mean like at 7-Eleven when you combine the slurpees? Yeah, yeah. You're doing like maybe if I do half a pump of conditioner. Throw the shampoo in there. Let's bubble up dude when you

finally when you finally nutted were you did it feel crazy it's a disappointing nut it was because I thought it was

gonna be it's not yeah it never is it never is no the I've tried to masturbate on

ecstasy also it's the most disappointing yeah I feel like it's a lot of work for not what you're expecting yeah I'm 25 I'm never gonna show his age I think it's an age thing I think it's like I don't know if it's testosterone related or what but like cocaine and ecstasy like having sex on either of those that at his age was like not a problem ever yeah it was like ecstasy or Molly the brother wasn't around but ecstasy at his age was like not a problem ever. And it was like, Ecstasy or Molly, Molly wasn't around,

but Ecstasy at like 25 was like, your biggest issue was putting a condom on so you didn't have seven kids. Like it was like the greatest time ever. And when I was in college, Ecstasy was it. I went to college, 98 to 2003, and it came out in like 2000, Ecstasy exploded everywhere on campus.

And what everybody talked about every Thursday or Friday night was like the shape. Like, yo, double stack Mitsubishi's are coming out on Friday. I know a guy. And everybody was on Molly, except for the one crew that was on Coke that I didn't even know.

There was like a back room where like even my buddies, they would be like, yeah, yeah, no, no, they're in a room for a bit. And I was like, what are they doing? We're all doing Molly or ecstasy. It took me like, until I was like 35, I was like, yeah, yeah, no, no, they're in a room for a bit. And I was like, what are they doing? We're all doing Molly or ecstasy. It took me like, until I was like 35,

I was like, oh, they were doing coke. They were coke kids all through college. I had no idea. It's crazy. Because coke, I think, skipped my generation almost. No, I think you were just looking for mountains to climb. You were just looking for different things. There were mountains of coke, and you just, you for mountains to climb. You were just looking for different things.

There were mountains of coke and you just stepped over them. To watch a Ken Burns talk. You boys are blowing. I will tell you, man, I'm so glad because Ecstasy, that time at Ecstasy, we were doing it in LA at that time.

Yeah. But I'm really glad, dude, I never liked coke yeah like i tried it and i and because of the people around me like you know when i was hanging to meet joey and joey diaz and i came up together he always looked like he was having such a good time yeah that i would always do it with him but i was like this is terrible for me yeah it's your wiring yeah yeah yeah i'm so glad yeah like mushrooms and weed and all that shit and generally you fall into one cat yeah yeah and the thing about ecstasy is

I think ecstasy straddles the line between the two groups yeah I think you would think so yeah the ecstasy pill though is a fucking roll the dice it is especially these days now you get a chip some off get it tested i won't take it absolutely absolutely anything that's pressed or that it can be mixed with anything else you have no idea you can have zero age man like when they buy drugs like that do they test it uh some people do some people don't um some people i know they say they don't test it because they're like i've i watched the guy take it right off the break and i've you know he's like you know family and i'm like family until he tries to kill you yeah but james he doesn't know what's right

that's the thing right he doesn't know and they'll and they always say no i mean i've seen like he says if he sees it from somewhere else yeah this, this guy's not going to the fucking Mali mine, right? I'm right from the 17 Mexican. Is there a mine? It's in one of the national parks what did you do once you got to denver denver in denver i did you ever leave the airport yeah i was originally gonna go take another flight to like veil or something but i was like i was so i was so full of anxiety in once I landed in Denver. Cause I was like, oh fuck, this is so crazy. Everyone's going to be talking about it was my concern. Everyone's going to be like, Al Conner's out of his fucking mind.

And him and Shane were still there. And Shane and him know where all the bodies are buried. I was like, they're both going to gonna pull my file and be on every show every road trip we've ever gone on the crazy i've spun off and done like that's all coming out he asked me this morning he's like dude how bad was it how many people did you tell about you know my my story i was like dude everybody was a fan of the decision like that rules me i agree with you when you were like when you were like he was in Denver I was like this dude gets it I love I love being on drugs and making a

decision and be like yeah I'm gonna do this yeah yeah it was ultimately the right decision but the Molly the Molly downtime you know the depression after Molly is greater than any drug I've ever done because it's so get in there get in ultimately the right decision but the molly the molly downtime you know the depression after molly is greater than any drug i've ever done because it's so get in there get in there you so though it's it's so grandiose in terms like the energy exhausted yeah you don't know what's happening like your body is so tired and constantly on intense yeah same thing with ecstasy that like when you come down you you're just like, you're depleting every, every positive thing that's ever been, your endorphins, your fucking, whatever the other thing is.

That's why I like mushrooms more. I like mushrooms so much. Yeah. We took some last night. I did on Friday. Yeah. Yeah. I like it, man.

And I like the next day. Yes. Yeah. It's a quick, quick term. I'm starting to feel like. I feel good the next day. I'm starting to feel like a little bit of mushrooms is better than weed for me. Yeah I don't think there's any doubt. Yeah, I don't think there's any doubt. You know what I have for you penis envy

Like you have you have a high tolerance for for we you said you were taking. So I see him in the airport. He goes, he looked at me and I was clearly dying. And he was like, I got 100 milligram weed gum you're going to take and then just pass. And everyone was like, 100 milligrams? That's Diaz numbers. Like I don't fucking. You can be 10, I'm flying. You're taking 100 milligrams?

Diaz is way past 100 milligrams. I take 100 milligrams before my shows. Diaz on podcast pops 1300 milligrams before my shows. Diaz on podcasts pops 1,300 milligrams at a time. Diaz is a psychopath. Let me tell you something about Joe Diaz. How long does that take to get to that level? 30 years? Let me just tell you.

This dude has like, he's all in or all out. And the best example I can give you is, I had known him for probably 10 years already. And he had never smoked a cigarette in his life. He bought a pack of cigarettes, smoked two packs that day. And smoked two packs a day until he quit one day like that. Yeah. Two packs. And not only that, he is a consumer.

It would be three drags and that's oh yeah do you know what i'm talking about yeah and then done but dude joey they eat a good i actually bet you know yeah yeah yeah i got up to four or five pussies in there. He started with one. I sucked my way through one and a half. Listen, dude. Let me just say something. I've known you for a minute now. Yeah.

It's so cool to see you fall into a groove, man. Yeah, thanks, man. Yeah, dude. That's due to him and a bunch of my friends, like Shane and Paulie and Ryan. Super funny dude. Oh, yeah. But there was zero focus. Yeah, I was all over the place.

I still am, but it's a little more focused. I see the mountains. Now I know how to get them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now you just got to put the burns on. I'm the dragon kicking and screaming into the pot. I know, yeah. Yeah. This is due to him.

Yeah, dude. It's so good to see because you've always been a super funny unique funny thank you dude thank you you know and a little off which i like yeah that's why weed's gonna it up yeah no weed's gonna level it out good man maybe maybe this is it that's certain i'm like one of those dude no therapy's gonna ruin all my fun shut up he'll help you i start my first therapy next week. You too? I'm sorry, Friday. Oh, yeah. BetterHelp is one of our sponsors. This is not sponsored by BetterHelp.

He's back doing stand-up now, too. I know. Which is huge, yeah. I'm four sets in. Feeling good. Rave reviews. Rave reviews so far. Are you same material, different material? The last four sets have been the same, just punched up each time. Different tags and whatnot.

I definitely need to take the next six months to get a nice 30 to go on the road. Which will take time. You're always welcome out with me, man. Hell yeah. I will tell you right now for me, dude, I've never felt better on stage. Yeah, that's great. I finally know what I do, what I do well. I've always been a good comic.

And it's been what, like 30? You've been in the... 38 years. No. I've been on and off, man. You know, I started... At least 25, right? I started stand-up with Joey and Brody in Seattle.

And then when I moved to LA, I was writing on TV shows. And so my deal with Beth was that I'm not going to go on the road, too. So I took probably eight years off of stand-up yeah okay and then i hopped back in right around when chelsea started and uh but man dude it's so good and the crowds have been you know we're going to australia in january yeah i saw you already sold out a couple shows right they're adding more yeah dude those shows are in january and they've already sold out in most of the cities in Australia. That fucking rules. Absolutely outstanding.

And you know what it's been, dude? Chris had sex with an Australian girl. You did? In Australia? No, in Vegas. Hey, congrats on the sex. Yeah, yeah. I didn't think you were going to fall into that.

I thought you were going to look at him and go. Yeah, yeah. Well, I don't want to ruin the vibes. Which day is it? But I am mad at you. We're going to talk about it later. How many days in did you have sex with an Australian girl? Two.

Hey, it's not ruining the vibes when we're congratulating you on the sex. Congratulations on all the sex, Chris. By the way, what a good friend, right? Yeah. Sex congratulations. What else do you want? No, he was throwing me under the bus. No, I'm not. What? This is great. I don't know how you got glitter on your he was throwing me under the bus. No I'm not.

What? This is great. I don't know how you got glitter on your fucking shirt. I believe it. I don't know. I wish I had a piece of glitter on this whole fucking board. I thought maybe you were going to use it. Yeah, that's from fucking Denver, boy.

Are you sure it's glitter? It's got to be. Matt, what else would it be? You think you're mining for gold? Fuck you. It could have? What else would it be? Are you sure? You're mining for gold? Fuck you. It could have been lotion. Lotion, I don't think so. Can we want anything?

Yeah, you can fire it up. Oh, okay. That's awesome. That's a thick board, too. Yeah, that's why I didn't light it up right away. I was just making sure. Wait, how long have you been feeling like you're in the zone? Is it like a recent phenomenon or has it been a couple of years?

It's probably been the last year. been really picking it up like but the last six months for him have been like when we went to portland it it was the first time like he always gets that rock star treatment the standing ovations all that but it was the first time that when i went to portland and i walked out it was like it was like i was doing like a set like they were so excited just to walk on stage and it was like hey what's like portland what the is up and it was like 15 20 seconds of just straight energy like that it's really amplified that's why you gotta start doing coke that's right that's funny they just hit back to back. Oh, no. Oh, that was a bomb.

Holy crap. That's a big dude. That's a fat pussy. We can never get a fucking big... It's all right. Would you stop talking about this Australian girl? Yeah. I mean, enough. Big fat pussy.

I was like, what? This... Nice. girl yeah if they take two it's in the day I mean you gotta feel pretty good oh yes yeah we go up to take taking one in San Diego right now it's great especially the first one all right is the first game of the series is huge huge take 70 70 75 percent winning yeah It's a huge, huge. Are you still gambling? Huh? You still gambling? Yeah. That was a pretty quick answer.

I'm not going to lie. It's not bad. I usually gamble only on football. That's all I gamble on too. Yeah. That's all I know. You just pick games. This doesn't. It's too tough.

Yeah. Gambling on this is. It's tough. Nah. You just pick a winner and that's it. It's a Friday night basketball home games I'll gamble on. It's impossible to pick a Friday night home team to cover basketball home games i'll gamble yeah it's impossible friday night home team to cover celtics look good this year yeah it's not really last night great last

night 35 from 10 35 from brown as a sixers fan yeah be careful you psyched on harden or no i am it's just an uneasy feeling about this the you know the the chemistry among all of them it's gonna take some time i'm psyched about Maxie more than anything. I was from Jump Street, dude. That kid is special. And I'm always worried that they're going to, because they won a championship. Right.

They're not going to trade him. No, I don't think so either. Also, we're young. We're bringing in older guys that have experience to get the chip this year or next. I was hoping it would show. It's game one, dude. It's game one.

I don't love Harden. I don't like Harden. He slows them don't I don't love hard hard. Yeah He slows them down. I think in bead. I think he does think that offense needs to run through and be and so It does it's running through hard. There's just no he's got the ball. But in bead is like he's a unicorn dude Yeah, so why you wouldn't put him at the time he passes. Well, yeah Shoot a jumper. He can hit a three every now and then. Yeah, he's a freak. He's a defensive force. And it's like when the offense starts with Maxie,

he like draws doubles. People start moving. I feel like Harden is not really doing that so much. He'll just be like up top, just sort of like sucking seconds. I wonder how much of it is like he's swallowing so much salary that it's like they have to give him the ball. It's like, why don't you position him as a two instead of demanding the touch every single play?

Switch it up. I don't know if he can play the two like that. I know. That's what I'm saying. He's such a dominant positional player that the whole symmetry changes. The chemistry in the team. No ball movement. It's just hard to take the ball away from a generational score like yeah but yeah that he dropped he dropped

smart and Tatum last night and on both of those shots missed the air ball dude like he hit the bottom of the fucking back when I was smart where he was like shimmy shimmy and then just a dude and also this last year where he dropped somebody so long. Yeah, he did his shimmy. He spun the ball, did his shimmy, and then hit it. It felt like he was trying to mimic that again. It wasn't natural timing.

And he just like, he shot like Ben Simmons. Dude, I saw him play in Houston and he would do that thing that he used to do, which is like, he would drive, he would get contact, he'd get fouled and then throw up like what looked like a prayer but it would always go in and so he was constantly getting three-point play he scored like 60 points or something like that i feel like even if he gets fouled now he's not like yeah yeah putting the ball in i agree yeah you know outside of kobe bryant he's the best bad shot maker I've ever seen. Yeah. You know, Kobe would make shots where you're like, don't, don't, oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's like the coach. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you're like, oh. The coach is like, what are you doing? Oh, all right. That's all right. That works. It's a good play.

It's a good play. It was the best at hitting any shot with a hand in his face. Like, if I'm picking anybody game on the line to make a shot with a hand in his face, it's Kobe. Well, he's dead. Have you guys seen it? Have you seen the redeemed? What? Thanks for that. you have you guys yeah he died trying to go to Denver late night I mean, national parks. You're looking for a ring? You know how much money you get on eBay, dude? By the way, Kobe's trail in Denver, a little different.

That trail went to the courthouse. Was that in Denver? Yeah, dude. Oh, shit. That was the pound truck. That was actually, yeah. That was in Edwards, I think, outside of Denver. Was that in Denver? Yeah, it was in Colorado.

I mean, it was like an hour from Denver. I think he was in the mountains. You know where he was. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm trying to get in there. It was booked. Hey, you know what? Speaking of mountains, so I was on a road trip to Utah in April with some buddies of

mine for my girlfriend's birthday. And my buddy is a big conspiracy guy and alien guy and loves all of that kind of Area 51 shit. And so we were sitting and talking and he was like... Do you want a hit, Tommy, by the way? I'll take a hit. He was like, just out of nowhere. What kind of shit is this? Is it sativa or the...

It's a hybrid, but it's a sativa-dominant hybrid. So you're going to get a little bit of both, but it's calming. It's nice. Here's what I know about Tommy Tommy Tommy Tommy likes drugs so if it's in front of them and you're asking if you want something almost like the drug is Stop burping the burp in if it goes sideways. That's why I sit there. Yeah, yeah. I'm going to call. You ever do meth by accident and dust everyone else's house? I did a lot of meth by accident. That's not what I said.

I said I did some. I didn't do a lot. Oh, well, the dude said it was coke. And I was like, yeah. That's what happened to him. Isn't that what you told me happened? But I only did two lines. Yeah, I did one Dude, it fucked me. Yeah. Oh, I know immediately cuz my nose was like word or burn. I thought I'd try again

Cuz I'm no quitter Yeah it hurts yeah i'm gonna say i'm 48 more hours shaky i didn't mean to interrupt your you know sorry it's all good and so he looked at us once and we were smoking a blunt in the car on the way to utah and he goes you know some of these mountains are fake right and i go what the did you just say to me he was like you know what avengers like when they had that like fake mountain base and it's a base built into a mountain and i was like yeah but that's a movie dude like that's not real and he goes his bob lazar yeah that's a movie, dude. Like, that's not real. And he goes, I think his name is Bob Lazar. What is his name, right?

Next area, 51 employee, right? He came out and said that there are fake mountains everywhere based in the desert. So it's like when you drive up to it, it's literally a hollowed out mountain that's titanium enforced. And you drive up to it and that shit opens up like it does in the movies. Do you believe it? I don't believe that. Why would you build a a fake there's plenty of real mounts to dig caves in probably real and then they dig and hollow them

out because you gotta keep the fake of the you know the real appearance from the other is norad oh we would see people hollowing out a mountain I mean you probably don't like common mountain or like the hill where people really go but you know It seems like intense work to hollow out in an entire mountain though. Not not for no. Yes, so does the volcano Patreon going through some some diggers some trucks some bulldozers For sure Some trucks, some bulldozers, some excavators. That's all of our fans. Why don't you see what we got? Our fans will tell you how to dig out a mountain.

Dude. For sure. I swear to God. Half of our fans are diggers and fucking bulldozers. It's true. These guys. Okay, okay. They'll tell you the proper way how to dig out a mountain. We'll put it to your fans.

Huh? We'll ask your fans. How long do you think it would take to hollow out a mountain? All right. Well, in the fucking 50s when they put a tunnel through a mountain okay like pa or or even in new york you don't have to go under the sea let's just say straight through like on your way to pittsburgh or some dog shit town like that right you got to go through a mountain they hollow that fucker out and i think that's true like building uh yeah i think they're i think norad is under a giant

mountain they definitely build in the mountains, but you can't add mountains because that will come up on satellite. They'll be like, that's a new mountain. Yeah. Yeah. What's this hill? They're dumb. They're Russian. They're so ugly as fuck. Man, are they? Are they? What? The men or women?

The men. Yes. What about the ugliest men we have outside of Eskimos? The women are the hottest women on earth, I think. Eskimos? What's with the? What? Yeah.

Eskimos. An Eskimo looks like a U-taped air out of a Russian. Come on, dude. come on That rules they're gonna have to cut him out of the Drew Barrymore show Munchkins back look we didn't touch her mrs. Barrymore You went super and missed this Barrymore. Barrymore.

It's very funny. Is it out? Oh yeah, I just put it down because we were in. Well, let's talk about your show, dude.

What time are we at, Bert? Am I interrupting you? What are we at? I'm kidding. 36. I want to make sure you get your show in.

Oh, dude, thank you. First of all, it's very funny, dude. Yeah. I love how you started with the dunk contest thinking he would just fucking destroy you. Listen, I...

Which I thought he would. Right? But if you were judging it, judging on, you know, skill and entertainment... Yeah. I mean, I feel like I was close. You were close. I mean, for a Jew, you had like a two-inch vertical. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which is pretty average. Yeah, yeah. I'm a tall Jew. You are a tall Jew. You did almost put a banana peel under the hood. When he said move it back I'm like that's a really good idea. That one black dude was like you might want to. Move it back.

It was a good note. It was a good note. But it's called family tussle. I almost had a Tom Segura moment there. That would have been. By the way everybody on set was like, oh my God. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car.

I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. I'm going to go get my car. moving back it was a good note it was a good note it was a good note but it's called Family Tussle almost had a Tom Segura

moment there that would have been by the way everybody on set was like yo you saw what happened to Segura right

I'm like do I look like Segura to you yeah but you don't know dude yeah that's true anybody can get it I trained

for this show you did is that why your shirt's off every fucking scene mostly yeah yeah but it looks pretty you do look good for your shirts off every fucking scene yeah yeah but you do look good for you yeah what are you 52 53 today today today my name over Barrymore. Mrs. Barrymore. Yay! Happy birthday to Skidich!

Father-son competition show where the loser has to do an embarrassing punishment. It's a great idea. He and I have a very cool relationship. It was so much fun.

Yeah. We each picked, you know, we alternated in the competitions we picked and like, they were fun, man. They got weird.

The punishments, like the punishment this one is I had to get a Brazilian wax. I'm good right now. I saw that. Yeah, yeah. And you're an asshole. Yeah, I got an asshole. They would have charged me double. I'll tell you that.

How funny was it to get my brother with the fucking Zoom camera? Dude, hilarious. Because I hired him for set photography that day. So we had to do it. Are you putting an unblurred version on the Patreon that's a great idea it's just gonna be my avatar yeah my brother just say it's that same creature from star wars he goes yeah he goes what am i doing i go just bring the camera make sure you bring a lens So I hired my brother. I go, hey, you want to be a photographer today? He goes, yeah.

He goes, what am I doing? I go, just bring a camera. Make sure you bring a lens. And so he knew he had to get pictures. And so when I was on all fours to wax my asshole, he took a shot. So a week later, he sent me a picture. And I didn't know what it was. And I go, what is that?

He goes, that's a close-up of of your asshole have you never seen that before did they go actually like around the the Cheerio yeah they did the whole situation holy Christmas

can I see some can I see some close your ears will you no I'm good did you and your wife enjoy that because it was

pristine you know what I feel like you have to like you know yeah check this out I mean it was a good laugh this is I feel like you have to like you know yeah check this out I mean it was a good life the only day you're gonna see it's like this again now I will tell you something else that she didn't know he made me was one of the punishments get a tattoo you got a tattoo on my back you can't show you because the shows alright I'll show you yeah yeah so I forgot to tell Beth

do you lose every time? No. He doesn't lose every time. No, dude. The one that comes out tonight, I lose. There are some things that I do. But here's the deal. You unzip your pants. Look what I had to do. I got this long dick as a challenge.

Here's the difference. He can't embarrass me, right? No, he can, dude. He's like 6'4". No, I know that. I'm? No, he can, dude. He's like 6'4". No, I know that. I'm still talking about the dick, dude. Damn, that league rules. Yeah, he can't embarrass me.

So our punishments are different. He gets embarrassed easy. So doing things in public, in front of people, for me, I don't care. So the things that he has me do, the wax the tattoo or things that I'm like well fuck I really don't want to do that that's permanent yeah yeah do you know what I mean yeah and so but the things that I'll show you a picture so my daughter but man I want to eat episodes eight episodes here's a deal nine nine episodes that's right episodes i also your asshole has its own episode um look i we pitched it and i had so many networks tell me what it should be or shouldn't be or how they're gonna change it have they not learned anything so i just i self-funded it i shot it

myself and because honestly dude if you look at everything i've done over the last five years yeah my specials look my youtube channel my facebook they're all in the millions right i get hundreds of millions of views on my youtube channel and i'm somebody that every network at the and the reason i decided to go online and shoot that special myself is because every no dude i was pre-show and i was pre- pretty yeah no I know but you see the success of me it's like because everybody said no to me yeah so I was like I know this is good yeah what we talking about yeah and so it changed a hundred percent betting on myself and and a hundred percent taking my own advice for my creative yeah changed my entire career yeah yeah it's also crazy when you're

doing live shows together and it's like you know how to be funny together yeah the idea that someone would give you notes on it is like right the show we've been working this evening we've been working this in front of crowds yeah right because you would understand but also like the show is is my sense of humor. It's weird. It's gross. It's juvenile. Yeah. But the best part is, for me, honestly, besides working with him, is I love bringing comics in. Like, those two judges were hilarious. The insults they gave for me were, what that dude called me, an awkwardly pale and ripped 50-year-old man.

He called you a strong-ass vampire. Yeah. That's what I remember. He told you're a strong-ass vampire But I'm so happy dude, I've honestly I can tell you I've never been more proud of anything I've ever created and it's the best thing about that's great. And this is I mean having your son with you I can't imagine come on, dude. Yeah, created and it's the best thing about that's great and this is I mean having your son with you I can't imagine come on dude yeah it's it's bonus time and my oldest son has started coming out on the road with me and doing stand-up sick it's been I hope he's fucking bombing getting his teeth can I show up and tell them about the first set he did can I be honest with

you his first guilt his first set he did what 20 minutes 20 minutes a sitting sitting on a stool. Holy shit. Is he black? Fucking National Geographic dream team Women though I can make yeah any joke I want right? You know Know what he where his confidence comes from is he served he served Overseas and in the military for what seven years something like that you did no no my brother say holy shit We'd start to hit Overseas I know as well as I did yeah, yeah, first of all we both would have been like you would have been looking for coke I'd have done overseas. I know. As well as I did. Yeah, yeah. First of all, we both would have been like,

you would have been looking for coke. I'd have been looking for weed. I would have been like, I've been one of the generals as of the way those fucking guys have been acting. Dude.

I don't even know what that means. I don't know. Do you want any weed, by the way? I'm good. I'll go. Yeah, somebody's got to anchor this, dude.

I'll go to the moon, dude. Yeah. I'm anchored. Do you have any games that are, you know, like more realistic games? Like what? You know, father-son relationships that like... Like slap fights? Yeah.

Like, do you guys box? We do box. Actually, we do. We do box. Yeah. Do you play one-on-one in other sports? So we box. We...

Are you allowed to say all this? Because you don't have to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The episodes are we box we did a rap battle which was oh my god pretty bad yeah yeah that's gotta be it was pretty we had somebody from Dancing with the Stars on to teach us dancing so we had to do some dancing and we had our professional dancer come in and teach us how to pole dance. Yeah, we did pole dancing.

Is this all gay? Who was better at that? Who was better at that? We did... Actually, Bert, get the pole. What else did this pizza guy teach you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did,

we got in those giant zorbs and ran at each other. Right. That's tonight. That's, that is tonight. Is that not all about,

it's not all about weight, right? It's got to be force and leverage. It's leverage. What I found, leverage and honestly, dude,

let me tell you something. What I found is that even an in shape 50 year old is not in as good a shape as an out of shape 25. Yeah, of course. Like, let me tell you something what i found uh is that even an in-shape 50 year old is not in as good a shape as an out of shape 25. yeah of course like there's a such a difference yeah i thought i was going to be physically down it doesn't matter what you look like no it's not real wrecked yo i'm not you're right no that's it he told me he was like for like three or four months that he got to it he was like yo I am training I'm gonna be

in the best shape of my life for this and I was like okay I'm not gonna work out just to show you that I'm still gonna beat the shit out of you anything physical and that's basically what happened yes definitely what happened I yeah I went back and played in like a lot an alumni game I played lacrosse in college and like just standing on the sidelines and a 22 year old in shape like running past me was like holy standing on the sidelines and a 22 year old in shape like running past me was like holy there's a different energy yeah yeah there's a physical there's a physicality and a different energy like like dude i got hit i almost shit my pants

it's because you were doing molly i honestly think my muscles are just keeping my bones. Yeah. You know what I mean? Everything's a little aligned. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But, you gotta like. So you can throw a baseball and your hand doesn't come off. Exactly. Yeah, yeah.

Instead of slinging on the beach. What the fuck are we doing here? What's the point of being alive? My father's like, right now he was, I just had my niece's birthday party, but my dad psychologically still thinks he's tough. Yeah. You know what I mean? So he still like talks back and he's like I'll fucking kill you

I don't like that you are you're literally pockets of ashes that you smoked for 60 years collecting in your bones if I hit you you'll turn into a bucket of confetti if I hit my father square in the jaw it would be a marionette puppet exploring the ground my mom would be a magic trick my mom would be so happy you should put that on tiktok on magic trick of knocking my dad out disappearing disappearing dad

yeah why does he go dad disappear like this is a variable let me get on your couch i'm a magician look at this i knocked my dad that is a good show dude she's Italian magic

Italian magic she's all violence stupid jokes at the fucking Home Depot at the Home Depot well that's great yeah dude I will tell you man

like I said for me if anybody people ask me how you can support and stuff none of my stuff you have to buy

but the support if you could come and just take a my stuff you is you have to buy but the support if you could come and just take a look at this show yeah it's such a huge deal for me because honestly like if i here's the goal the goal is we call it family tussle because season two is me and my older son or me and my daughter or season your brother or my brother or dude season two your dad dead. No, he's alive. Oh you eat that There you go. It's grabs the muffin That's probably a better joke really shut up Really dad is like Tom also fucking just a savage

No, I just when I refer to him I don't refer to him as grandpa tom wolf is a fucking man yeah yeah dude he's so fucking he does he's in good shape that is not a better shape but he's in good shape dude plays 18 holes 18 every day he works out four days a week yeah and he shoots below his age yeah tom tom wolf sounds like a guy who like trains navy seals he shot an 84 the other day he's 85 and i go dude you're shooting going to tell you something now. He shot an 84 the other day. He's 85. And I go, dude, you're shooting below your age. He goes, yeah, but it's an 84. Yeah.

That's how much time do they have? And I was like, what? Yeah. That's my front nine. Like, what are we talking about? An 84? Yeah. But yeah, dude, he's a ridiculous. I'm going to get Chris in the golfing.

Santino's been trying. Yeah, I know. I know. I want to play. Santino's a good golfer, though. Yeah. Yeah, he's real good. Are you good? I used to be good. I haven't played in years. But you were a baseball player, right. Yeah, I know. I know. I want to play. 05.30 to 5.00. Santino's a good golfer though.

05.30 to 5.00. Yeah, he's real good. 05.30 to 5.00. Are you good? 05.30 to 5.00. I used to be good. I haven't played in years. 05.30 to 5.00.

But you were a baseball player, right? 05.30 to 5.00. Yeah, it'll work out. 05.30 to 5.00. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, see, that's what I said. 05.30 to 5.00. I can shoot an 85 tomorrow and I've golfed for years.

05.30 to 5.00. No, no, no. 05.30 to 5.00. Yeah, I will. 05.30 to 5.00. No, no. 05.30 with you. Okay. Okay. Next summer? No, shoot an 85. Shoot an 85. Shut up, shut up. You crazy? I say this all the time, but if Tommy goes to the gym during the day, afterwards he can do anything.

He like, his brain, like it more than, like it just balances him. It like shoots him into another level where it's like every girl's trying to, every guy's trying to fuck him. Like, it's just like, he can kick everyone's ass. He can shoot 85 without having played golf in five years. You got to keep yourself up in these depressing times, dude.

I'm just trying to offset the molly downs. Sports ups equal out molly downs. If you went out to the course tomorrow, what would you shoot? What kind of course? Because it does matter. A golf course. No, I don't think you know because you only go out with Santino. You don't know the course. No, that's it. I don't think you know because you only go out with Santino.

You don't know the levels. No, I know. So that's probably real high end. Which the rough is very difficult. I'd be spraying. I'd give you a municipal course. Yeah. Okay.

Which is pretty flat. Okay, what's the... Well, I don't know what you were shooting pre this. I would go out with my dad twice a year. I wouldn't practice on you were shooting pre this I would go out my dad twice a year I wouldn't practice on the range there's none of that shit it's just like see what happens so my short game is dog shit long game I'd spray a bit but I'd make up for it so my my intro to like I hit the ball like 300 okay um so the irons it doesn't. I would say twice a year I'm in between 83 and 88. Okay, here's what I would tell you.

You go out tomorrow. Yeah. I haven't swung, I'll go to the clubs right now. They're still wrapped. You just got booked for family tussle, dude. I'll play you. Getting ready for your hassle is getting relaxed. hustle do I bet you with the with you I would need somebody to say I'm with you. All right, Chris will hope film it Yeah, yeah, and believe me I will of the strict scores. Yeah

With the pressure and with him talking shit to you for me and getting you mad I got a headset in yeah I would say 91 I would say 91. That would be nice. $200. $200? I'll bet you $200. Baby, you're rich.

I'm going to take your fucking wealth. I'll bet you $200. All right. Okay. Do I have to really go tomorrow? You can't practice. All right. I won't practice.

He's got my clubs I Burr Can you grab the clubs That are next to my Book stand I want to show him Just grab like three I just want to show the wrapped Haven't used

At all I used a driver once For a pilot My buddy Tyler All fucked it But I haven't used my clubs And I won't I'll keep them on

Did he say fucked it What What Fucked the driver No I won't. I'll keep them on. Did he say fucked it? What? What? Fucked the driver? No, I used it once. What'd you say? Oh, my buddy's pilot. Tyler.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought you said Tyler fucked it. No, no. I also heard that. So I was confused. Yeah, yeah. Truth or blitz. I was going to say, dude.

Yeah, I feel great. Okay, so here's the deal. So you don't have to go out tomorrow. Chris, deal. So you don't have to go out tomorrow. You don't have to go out tomorrow. But the next time you do go out. Okay. Yeah, there's my irons wrapped. Don't.

I like how he bowed. So we'll photograph those before he starts. He's going to take the wrapper off at the course. These are clearly wrapped. That is wrapped. I like it. I think. Yep, they are wrapped. I mean, any time I can watch him potentially go to pieces over an athletic event. That's what I'm saying. 00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00, It'll be more enjoyable for you to see him meltdown than to get 200 oh easily

Yeah, so yeah, so I feel like you and I are on the same. I'm gonna get the whole three go give him two I fucking dollars Shave my ass all right now Yeah, thanks, I don't gotta play the00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00,00, This is worth everything. Just wear a GoPro. I mean, just a chestnut GoPro just so we'll always know him. I'll bring a drone out. It's right here. Right back at all. Come on!

Yo, I imagine your meltdowns can be epic. Oh yeah. It's bad. Dude, we play, we play VR golf.

I don't know if you play that. Oh my God. Dude, it fucking rules. It's so much fun. it's unbelievable. I want to. We you play that. Dude, it fucking rules. It's so much fun. It's unbelievable. I want to make an offense where we need to. We're due. We're due, Chris. We gotta do a VR before you leave.

Yeah, definitely. He got a fucking Oculus sent to him like three or four years ago and hasn't opened it. Oh, dude, that's what we use, the Oculus. Should I get into it? Yes. Dude, it's so much. We played with Santino. It feels pretty authentic. And you're just like, you're, you know, you were across the country all talking shit to one another on the same course.

06.13 Yeah. It's great. It's fucking amazing. 06.14 Do you have to be a good golfer to be a good VR? 06.15 It certainly helps because it is a lot more accurate than you would think. The touch on the club in terms of distance and feel. Because when you come across the ball on the tee

and you know you sliced it, it has a realistic slice. It tracks. As soon as you position the ball, there must be some splice where it tracks where you're coming across that midpoint in order to put the spin on the ball. What are you shooting on VR, girl?

Much better than I do in real life. Oh, okay. Yeah, so it's it's it's definitely forgiving yeah yeah but it's pretty accurate in terms of touch they've made a bunch of modifications since we played last but like the way the settings were it was like it was accurate enough to feel like if you fucked up you would fuck up but forgiving enough where it wasn't like yeah it's not fun like you could just jump in and play yeah yeah you can change the setting so that it's super fucking hard and i'm a hundred percent gonna break that i just gotta

find out where it is you would never let me have it when i kept asking for it i'm like dude you don't use it like let me have it because i'll use it and he was like no i'll use it eventually you know how you use it dude the vr porn is unbelievable i bet it is congratulations yeah it's pretty wild i've only used it a few times because it's too much you know too much what getting the lotion off my head no no no i mean in vr you make sure you stay in your own apartment right my first time like i looked it up my boys were telling me like yo you tried vr porn i was like no not yet so i look i look it up and they're like yeah you just go into like porn hub or any site you put vr porn it gives you every option yeah so i'm sitting there i'm like how good could it be yeah i pick these four girls in a hot

tub and you're locked into the dude they take his point of view yeah it's an actual video oh yeah you're looking around there's girls all over there like they're like ASMR shit to they like kiss your ear and stuff. It's PR It's crazy Chris girls start coming at me and the whole time I was like, oh, I got two girls leaking both stuff. Yeah, hilarious. I used to jerk off to magazines. Yeah, I know. Me too.

Yeah, that's how we all started. That is crazy how far that's come. Yeah. Holy shit. Dude, my fucking, there was a trolley that ran behind my house and that was a gold mine that's how like all the derelicts yeah we call them hammers are like uh generational kids of uh the pagan gang motorcycle gang and as you walk down the strip for like say a half mile a mile you would just see crumpled up porn pages and you take them out like iron them

over your knee and just like black tits dude yeah i've never seen black tits outside of national geographic like on the front which i first started jerking off to oh yeah yeah geographic and then jc penny catalogs yeah jc penny was big yeah i was knocking around i think the catalogs jc penny was Bailing suit, JCPenney was porn. You know, I asked somebody this yesterday. I'm glad I didn't grow up in that generation. I mean, I can't imagine doing it in this generation. What's the first tit you saw? I asked somebody this yesterday.

I'm curious. The first tit. Was that a National Geographic? In person, you mean? No, it was just like the first one you ever saw. Oh, yeah. Yeah. 100%.

What about movies? Do you remember the first movie, Naked, you saw? Terminator, maybe? No. Was there nudity in top gun no there was definitely kids oh uh definitely was horny as fuck what the bill murray yeah there might have been 85 yeah there might have been is that 85 it's got to be what's he doing earlier than 85 but was there nudity in Meatballs? Maybe.

Meatballs was half the movie. Yeah, it definitely was. That wasn't Bill Murray, right? Yeah. Yo, dude. It was the whole crew. Yeah, there was another one too. That's good.

Yo, I do, I'm not gonna lie to you, I miss a good summer camp movie. Yeah. They had like a string there where every movie was like, are they there

at summer camp again? Yeah, I feel like the last one was like Wet Hot American Summer that I can imagine being like. Yeah, but that was like are they there at summer camp again yeah I feel like the last one was like wet hot American summer that I can imagine being like 88

no no that was in the 90s that was like late 90s maybe early 2000s what I was just gonna say what year was the first

American pie American pie had a camp one didn't they yeah they did I feel like it was like 99 79 are there tits and meatballs

definitely people are there tits and meatballs? Definitely. Just say tit pits. People are there tits in meatballs. Tits in meatballs. Yeah. Tit pits in meatballs. People know it's mango, beef, and sometimes pork, never tit. Go back to bed.

Tell your mom and father. Put you to fucking sleep, you sick fuck. Holy shit. What's your date, sir? What time are we at there, Berkey? We're at. We're at. We're at.

We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. We're at. holy shit what's your date sir what time we at there Berkey all right I gotta do this I gotta do this read you guys want to say your dates first yeah yeah when's

this coming up this is coming out tomorrow okay I Omaha I'm there this weekend we sold out every show so I had add another one'm there this weekend. We sold out every show, so I had to add another one. Say the dates. So if you're there, October 21st and 22nd, Omaha. The first weekend in November, November 7th in Tacoma. And then Boston, Laugh Boston is like the 10th, 12th, something like that. Mohican Sun the weekend after that. I don't know the dates. That's sick.

You can read it in joshwulf.com for a totally different date. There you go. Thank you very much but Family Tussle Man if you go to YouTube type in Josh Wolf we would love for you guys to check it out

yeah check it out you got 2 million subs yeah man that's crazy that is crazy we have 20,000 16,000

20,000 subscribe yeah wait till you see this fucking blast dude they're gonna go they don't know pothead time yet is it to go yeah I think so don't go I gotta come out hot do I gotta I gotta show my ass. All right. You guys know what ExpressVPN is? No.

Neither do we. No, actually, I've used it before. It's a incognito mode in terms of searching. So nobody knows what you're searching, where you're at. Oh, yeah. That's good for your VR point. I was just going to say. It's good for him.

That's right. Once you give him the headset, he's going to be in the hotel room next to you. That sounds terrible. Wacking off in Tunisia to some elephant. Tunisia? Yeah. I think so. Jesus.

That's where his IP address would be. Google makes its fortune by tracking your movements online. Google says incognito does not mean invisible. So your online activity will still get tracked and data brokers still get to sell and buy your info you don't fucking want that you hide this great when I'm on the road smoking weed with my hippie friends I know ExpressVPN will keep me secure anywhere when I'm using ExpressVPN I know I'm getting the best production it's like having a junkyard dog with me online that's fucking tough

yeah that's tough yeah super tough super fucking tough if you really want to go in Cognito and protect your privacy secure yourself for the number one rate of VPN visit Express VPN comm slash stuff Island and get three extra months for free oh Holy shit. Have you not read that before? No. Oh, yeah. You were surprised by your own promo.

Yeah, yeah. I think I read it last night, but I didn't get to this part. Well, the sick thing is... I didn't get to this part. I love the genuine, oh, that's a good deal. Three months, dude. Holy shit. You've never seen three months.

Yeah, yeah. I've seen like three delivery and 10% off. Well, you can't really deliver that. That's e-x-p-r-e-s-s-v-p-n dot com slash stuff island. Express vpn dot com slash stuff island to learn more. Okay. The number one thing is you can watch Netflix in other countries. Yes.

Oh, that's great. You can get a wider. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, interesting. And I wonder if Amazon and fucking Hulu are different too. Yes. Oh, that's great. So you get a wider. Yeah, yeah. Oh, interesting. And I wonder if Amazon and fucking Hulu are different too. Yeah. I don't know.

I bet you get a bunch of BBC shit. How was it? It's pretty fucking good. I had this one. I'm going to go Red Velvet. Yo, happy birthday, baby. Yeah. I love you.

Thanks, man. It's pretty hot. There's an Oreo one. These are good. 53 to date. 53 to date. Burke and I, he's 33 November 21st I'm 43

November 21st 10 years apart same birthday how about that and what are the odds you guys end up in the same room together crazy

yeah right super nuts it's crazy it's cause of Shane Gillis is that right yeah Shane's boy listen dude yeah

I might shove all of these in my face right now they're fucking really good man maybe this will be a thing they're tasty who eats until they puke like weird shit like eating contest also you did already you lost did you it was it just eating or is it eating and exercising what's the blue smurf roll it you have a fucking... You have a belt episode where you beat the shit out of him

for no reason? Hey, by the way, speaking of belts, does somebody have one that I can wear home? Yeah, I got a belt. Yeah, I can give you a belt. You've been wearing

my fucking belt all weekend. Yeah. Do you have a belt? I actually don't have a belt. I do. Yeah, I have a belt. No, I don't think you have a belt. Two hundred dollars.

It's a braided belt. This is a high school remake. 1998. You gotta flip it down so it looks like a dick, dude. How long have you had that belt? This is actually new. This is like three years.

This is not an OG. Do they still sell those? They're coming back. Everything that the kids are wearing these days is from the 90s. And they act like they're cool. I'm like,

bitch, I was wearing that fucking thing in 94. The overall, the baggy clothes. Chris, I worked out today. Yeah, i know he's changing soon he doesn't think long shorts are coming back though they're not that's the one thing i'm strong i wish jams if jams came back jams remember jams oh if jams came back i would 100 i got color jams they're coming back yeah i'll share with you hell yeah i'd like to take a look at that I would like to take a look at that talk about your first tit you're gonna get hard as fuck

you know I already am young boy alright let's go to the page alright we're