Subpar - Mark Grace returns to talk his favorite moments playing the Pebble Beach Pro-Am with Bill Murray and his first impressions of a young Tiger Woods

Episode Date: July 7, 2026

On this week's episode of Subpar, Chicago Cubs Hall of Famer Mark Grace makes his long-awaited return to the studio. The current analyst for the Arizona Diamondbacks talks his favorite moments from being paired with Bill Murray at the Pebble Beach Pro-Am, stories with fellow Chicago legends Michael Jordan and Harry Caray over the years and his first impressions of a young Tiger Woods. --Thanks to our friends over at Blue Run for sponsoring this week's episode.Next time you're enjoying that post-round high, make it a Blue Run. Discover all of Blue Run's expressions and find a retailer near you at bluerunspirits.com. CELEBRATE RESPONSIBLY, Copyright 2026 BLUE RUN SPIRITS, INC., KENTUCKY

Hello everyone, welcome back to Subpar with Colt Nost and Drew Stoltz. And before we get going here, we are very excited to welcome on a new sponsor. That being Blue Run Spirits, they like to get amongst it, we like to get amongst it, it's a perfect fit. And the round eventually ends. But let's be honest, the best stories usually start afterward. Whether you're reliving a birdie, debating a generous scorecard, or telling everyone about the drive that definitely would have carried 300 if the wind wasn't in your face, Those post-round moments are what golf is all about. That's why I like Blue Run Whiskey.

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Discover all of Blue Run's expressions and find a retailer near you at Blue RunSpirit.com. Celebrate responsibly. Copyright 2026 Blue Run Spirits Inc. Kentucky. All right, Slees, let's get it started. Our man Chris Godder up picks up another win on the PGA tour, his third of the season, fifth of his career. We'll final round 62 at the John Deere Classic to beat Max Holter. went by a shot and Ben Coles, who was also right there until a disastrous double bogey at the 72nd hole cost him where he was looking for his first win on the PJ tour.

But shout out to Goddard up, man. The highest ranked player in the field went out there and got the job done with his brother on the bag, which was really cool. Yeah, that's pretty cool. His boy Brady stocked at home having a baby. Congratulations to Brady, by the way, on the birth of the newborn. But like you said, man, I mean, this is his fourth win in the last year going back to Scottish. How about of the three wins this season, BG, he's shot 64 or lower in the final round

of all three of them. There's only been four of those rounds on the PJ tour this year, Wyndham Clark at the Byron being the other one. But the guy closes it out when he gets in the hunt. He's done it on a bunch of different styles of golf courses, which I think is the most impressive. You can go to like, you know, Hawaii is completely different than TBC Scottsdale, completely different than deer run. He's done it on firm and fast. He's done it on soft and squishy. like it was this week. And he just seems to like, he just seems to keep getting better and better and better,

rising up the ranks. I mean, he's, it's basically Scotty and Rory and then a bunch of guys that have thrown them in the, themselves in the mix for like the next best player. After that,

Chris Goddrup, absolutely one of them. Hell of a, hell of a show, a little nine under final round normally gets it done. I like the word squishy. A little squishy out there,

a little moor. Some call it more. Some call it damp. I think squishy is better. squishy. I will say, I just want to give him some more love because with everything that's going on

with this schedule right now. I mean, you're talking Chris Godder, as I mentioned, was the 14th ranked player in the world, now up to seven with that win. But he's in a stretch right now where he played the U.S. Open, the Travelers. You got the John Deere, and then he's defending this week

at the Genesis Scottish Open and he has the Open Championship. So that's five weeks in a row. No one would have blamed him, I believe, if he would have skipped the John Deer Classic and played two on, one off, two on. But this tournament means a lot to Chris Goddor up. He was in 2022, he wrote a letter to the John Deere Classic asking for a sponsor exemption and said,

I'll make you proud. I really would love an opportunity to play here. They gave him one. He finished tied for fourth. Every year he's been eligible for the John Deer Classic, he has teed it up. And I just think that is so cool that he honored that. He remembers what they did for him when he was just trying to get going in this game. and now he's one of the best in the world

and he goes back to that, back to that tournament because they gave him a chance and he appreciates it so much. Like I said, no one would have blamed him for taking a week off the way the schedule is, but he went out there, he teed up, and now he's your champion. And I expect to see him in the Quad Cities

for many years to come. Yeah, and with the way things are going with the PJ tour, how it's going to shake out. Like, who knows how many times he'll get to play there ever again. It kind of sucks. Like, that's the thing we've talked about. Like, I'd love to see, you know, an exemption given for like one week a year,

like a hometown event for most guys. Or, you know, John Deere does a great job giving these young guys sponsors exemptions. The travelers used to be the exact same way, you know, before it was a signature event. I'd love to see that exception because, I mean, guys are loyal like that. Chris Goddra up being in front of him. He wants to go back and support that event. Guys want to play their hometown event. Who knows how this shakes out, but it's a huge boost.

And by the way, like that's a, look, that's a Quad Cities. Like, that's a small market, right? We always talk about John Deere, like when we're making comparisons, things. but they show up out there. And that's the biggest stage they got in that town. And people are circling that date on their calendar. It's just going to be tough to see if some of these kind of get boxed into where these top guys, guys that want to be loyal to these events aren't even allowed to.

And John Deere won't be the only one, dude. There's a bunch of other ones out there, too. Just a perfect example this week with Chris Godder up. Absolutely. No one would have blamed him not playing this week. Going over, getting ready, defending champ. Then you got the final major of the season. But he goes and plays.

That's the kind of dude he is, man. He's just like a loyal dude. You talk to any teammate who ever played with him, any coach. They all say the same thing about Godrup, man. He's a dude, and he just keeps on getting better and better. He's fun to watch, play a game. It's very, very simple golf game. I love the way he plays.

Yeah, and also, you know, we had Max Homa on our serious XM show earlier today, and by the way, Max, very nice playing. Solo second. Just missed out on a playoff by one shot there. Good to see him play well once again. but just talking about how the PGA tour is, they're talking about how they want to go to these big markets. They think that's going to make the product better.

But if you look at the last two weeks on the PGA tour, the Travelers Championship outside of Hartford and this week, both finishes were absolutely electric. The travelers always is. The John Deere, you know, it's the butt of a lot of the jokes when you're talking about the PGA tour. And Max talked about how amazing it is there in the Quad Cities. I mean, they get huge crowds.

Yes, I understand they have big concerts Saturday and Sunday, that that helps a lot. I'd carry Underwood this year and Old Dominion on Sunday. Carrie, legs. How was my girl? Did she ask about me? The legs are still looking rather nicely.

I believe she does a lot of squats. Yeah. Yeah, she's looking good. But, and Max was talking about the John Deere. He's like, look, they basically have everything going against them. It's 115 degrees. It's miserable. It's July 4th weekend.

The field's not that great. But yet, everyone in that community comes out and supports the event. I mean, they look forward to this every single year. It's the same in Hartford. But I love in these small markets when it means so much to the community, and they come out there and support it no matter what. The crowds were phenomenal this week.

The tournament staff, I mean, they roll out the red carpet for these guys. It is so cool. And I just think it would be, it would suck to see the John Deere, possibly be a track two event, a Challenger series event, which it's kind of up to John Deere. I mean, if they want to pony up the money, obviously they could be one. But I think we've got to be really careful about just focusing on these big markets. Well, when you go to a place like the John Deere, like, this is the biggest show in town.

It's the biggest thing they got that comes to this. It's the same with like small market college football teams. Like you go to Starkville, Mississippi. You don't have an NBA team. You don't have an NFL team. What's the show? Dude, Mississippi State. You know what I mean?

You can go to a bunch of those type of cities. Compare this event, the John Deer, to like, Riviera earlier in the year. Maybe my favorite golf course on the PJ tour. One of them, for sure, one of the best places. What's that atmosphere like in L.A.? There's your big market. Does it seem like anyone out there gives a shit?

Not really. Nope. You know, they got the Lakers. They got the rant. I mean, we got every other thing in the world out there. The smaller of the market, the bigger the deal it becomes to them. And I'm kind of with you. I don't know how this will shake out if I make tweaks to kind of what they've laid out already.

But, yeah, this is. And especially with Goddrup being the guy that elected to play when he didn't need to and winning it, just kind of like drives it home even more. Like it'd be nice to see if there was some sort of way to overlap the tier one guys and the tier two events when they choose to or want to with some exception. Just imagine if it is a tier one event, though, if they put up the money, like having the best players in the world come to the Quad Cities. Imagine what the atmosphere would be like then. Oh, I mean, that place would explode. They show up for all of them anyway.

And like Chris Goddop's highest ranked guy in the field. He's a stud, but he ain't like a global superstar. Yeah. You get some of those guys showing up. It's a whole different ballgame. But it ended up being a really fun tournament like it tends to do at the John Deere. Ben Coles, man, got a feel for him. Second time, Cole, like where he's at a very good chance on the 72nd hole.

You know, watching that back yesterday. I think you were in the car at the time. But like when it became his turn to hit, like they panned off the ball. like okay now over to ben colds he's got 162 and he was like over the ball hitting it it would seem so fast for a guy that like the whole rest of the day didn't play at that speed it's so easy to play armchair quarterback and you know second guess things but it just seemed like he got up over that thing super quick and it would have been nice to maybe take a little breath and you know maybe things play out different and then to and then to three put it after getting the

great break they'd be able to get it on the green and cost himself a 300 plus k and a bunch of points that was tough for a guy that's, I mean, he's been at it, he's been grinding, playing a lot of golf all over the place for a long time. That one stung a little bit. Yeah, I'm with you. I thought he did play it extremely fast. The golf swing was also much different than anything he had made all day. It was very short, very quick in transition, which normally leads to some pools. He tried to get a little chippy eight iron, which, you know, looking back, I'm sure he's kicking himself on not just trying to smash the nine, considering how pumped up he was and how, look, he's tied for the league. And we talked about this on our serious XM show.

Like, he didn't have to make Bertie. Like, obviously, Bertie wins it. But first things first, like, when you're in a bad situation as far as a number and you're in between clubs, it's like, okay, let's hit the smart one here. If we make a put, great. If not, we live to see another day. And then maybe in the playoff, you hit a drive and you get a good yardage. And then you can go attack.

I know he's going to regret that one for a while. It comes after just a couple of years ago, 2024 at the C. The C.J. Cup Byron Nelson, when he made the only bogey of the day, on the par 5-18th when he was Greenside and two. Taylor Pindrith made birdie, two-shot swing. He ends up losing by one. It's tough, man. Sevent second hole with a chance to win has not been good to Ben Coles.

And this is the guy who's won a lot. I mean, he's won five times on the Corn Ferry Tour. I was looking to be just the fourth person ever to win on the PJ Tour and the Corn Ferry Tour in the same year. That being Matt McCarty, Jason Gore, and Paul Stankowski. But you feel for him, man, it sucks. Hopefully he gets another chance, but you never know. Yeah.

And I don't know about you, but for me especially and pretty much everyone I've talked to, when I'm in that situation, like, I'm nervous. I can't feel my hands. It all comes down to this. Final hole. Like, I don't like taking something off. I like getting something full, you know. It's so easy to have that upper body go, lower body stop when you're trying to take

something off and hit the shot that he hit. But play damn good golf. Hopefully he gets another crack at it here soon. But that was a costly one for him. But on the flip side, a positive story, good to see Max Homo playing. some good golf again. He wasn't really like in it going into the back nine, but he played it up and birded five of the last seven and had a put on the last hole to have a chance for a playoff there. But he and John Ellis, since they've been working together, that's been going nicely.

I think Max, you know, when we talked to him today, just like being a little easier on himself, trying to have a little more fun on the golf course than he's had. But it's also nice when you're doing all the work that he's been doing. And you and I have seen it, like to finally start to get some results and get some numbers on the board. Like that's a look out for him this week at disco. So he's trending. Yeah, he was phenomenal on our serious XM show today. Seemed to be in really good spirits.

Obviously, games starting to come together. Him and Mark Blackburn starting to figure it out. But when Max is smiling, a lot better golf happens. And we want to see Max smile a lot more. But it was an awesome week. Man, Quad Cities, John Deere Classic, y'all are awesome. Duck City, Chef Jeremy and all the crew, three nights in Rosalie, shut the place down.

Food was phenomenal. drinks were phenomenal. It's just one of those weeks you get excited for when it comes around, and I love it so much. I'm ready for a little nap. I am a little tired. Got to head over to Scotland on Wednesday. We got some big golf lined up, myself and Waggoo, playing North Barrack on Thursday afternoon, and we got a full day in store over at Muirfield. I've never played either of them. I'm so pumped for this. It's going to be great. Murefield, we got the whole day. Show up in the morning, play 18 holes, go put the coat and tie on, fancy boozy, lunch afternoon alternate shot who you got an alternate shot so i believe i'll be playing with our member

and then johnson will be playing with his son graham which i feel like we're going to get going to virginia yeah he's a plus he's the best player in the group um so that could be a little difficult um it's it's going to be awesome man i did just pick up another win um shout out to davenport country club brian and shout out to myself yes and shout out to myself for getting another win nine and three now on the season against Johnson Wagner, but Davenport Country Club, what a place. If you ever get the chance, it is freaking incredible. I was blown away. Had no idea what to expect, but I can promise you, I didn't expect what we got there.

That is tremendous golf course, awesome logo, awesome people, everything. Shout out to Davenport Country Club for being our host, and then these two in Scotland, man, it's going to be awesome. Genesis Scottish Open. We're on from, how about our hours over there, Sleeves, because we do it off of, obviously, the eastern time zone in the United States. Our hours in Scotland, we're on air 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. Oh, nice.

We could play golf before we go to work. You can play a bunch of golf before you go to work. The big question is, and it matters what happens tonight since we're recording this on Monday, what are you going to do if the U.S. keeps advancing in this World Cup. You might be up at – I saw a video of England last night. It was like 3 o'clock in the morning, and they were just losing their shit over there on the Eastport goal. That could be a little tricky. be an American patriot over there for the World Cup.

I'll set my alarm. I'll set my arm. I promise you. I'll get up. I'm a proud American. I'm very excited. The game tonight's going to be awesome. All the games have been great.

It's been so much fun to watch. Mexico City was electric last night. England going in there and beating them. But it's cool, man. It's been fun to watch. I got to worry about the World Cup sleaze. And then also, Saturday night, the King is back.

Connor McGregor going into the Octagon against Max Holloway, which I'm so sad. Like, I would have been in the building if I didn't have to go to Scotland for the Scottish Open. That's going to be on Sunday morning, I think, around like 6 a.m. If my math is correct, that's a little bit of a tough one. That's a tough one. That's an unreal sports day, by the way. We got like World Cup.

I don't know if it's the semis or what it is, like leading up to it. And then you got that making his return. That's a big, big sports day here. But I'm all in on this soccer dude. I've watched zero soccer games the last four years and I've been watching shit. I don't know what the rules are. I don't know what's a foul, what's a red card, what's a minor, what's not. All I know is Flo Berrigan.

Shout out to FIFA, the most corrupt organization in the world. Turns out all he needs is a phone call from the President of the United States. That helps. I think you made a little mistake. Might want to review that. Boom, back in the game. Shout out to us. Love that.

By the way, Connor McGregor, too, also one of the greatest quotes of all time. I would like to take the time to apologize to absolutely nobody. Yeah, that's incredible. Put it on my tombstone. That's going to be a war, though. Max Holloway. He's a bad man as well, but it's going to be awesome. Great sporting day.

I've got to figure out of time this all together over there in Scotland. I'll sure I'll screw it up. But let's get to some gambling sleeves. Let's make some picks this week for the Genesis Scottish Open over at the Renaissance Club, as they like to say it. And I know you've got a top 20 bet you really like. I got a top 20 bet I like for a hometown kid and a former champion of this event. I think he's, I think playing links.

golf obviously growing up plays a big factor in this, but I just love it. The more he plays the ball on the ground, the more I kind of like this guy. But give me Bobby McIntyre, your 24 winner, top 20 plus money. Yeah, plus 140. That was an awesome scene a couple years ago when he won his National Open, wild stretch of golf coming down there. They did reroute the golf course once again, because if you remember, he hit it really close from the weeds over on 16 when he got the drop from the spring run.

They've rerouted it now. I believe that hole is going to be actually on the front. nine now so they've made a few changes to make this finish a little more exciting they have a awesome stadium hole which will be the 15th hole this week a little short part of three i think three thousand people sit around it it's it's really cool but i like that bet i also like there's seven live players seeing it up this week since the co-sanctioned event between the dp world tour and the pgia tour um like charlhattan top 10 plus 300 yeah played good golf the last time it's what he won on live always play good uh yeah and his had only problem is

haven't played much golf in a while. Those boys got a nice little, it's almost two-month break from Live, at least, in the middle of the season. But, yeah, he seems to be piecing it together more and more frequently at these major championships. So I like that. Yeah, and as far as the win goes, you know, it's always tough to pick a winner out of these. I mean, there's 144 guys teeing it up. But I do like getting 20 to 1 on my money for Matt Fitzpatrick,

who has just been a machine this year. Three wins, tied with Chris Goddard up for the most. He loves links golf He's good in the wind He's good when it's very difficult Give me Maddie Fitz Yeah I mean he's another He's one of those names like after Scotty and Rory

Who's the next best player I mean is it is it him I mean you could put Goddra up in that mix You could put Fitz Zander Rom Marcala Like that group is getting crowded But he might be at the forefront of it Mm-hmm

Yep Good to see them team it up this week Over the Genesis Scottish show But also shout out Padra Carrington on one another U.S. Senior Open at Sioda. Place looked phenomenal on TV. But that's back to back for him at the U.S. Senior Open. His third one overall, he won by four over Stewart's sake.

Pat Perez, another top 10. He's two for two, top 10 in major championships over on the Champions Tour. Pumped for him, ready for him to get out there full time and start playing every freaking week. Come on. He broadcasts some golf. Get this suspension out of here. Let's go play golf. Yeah, what's his date?

I don't even remember. I believe it's same as Patrick Reed, August 25th. Yeah, he's still going to get some events afterwards, I believe. So that'll end soon, not just the majors. But yeah, he's off and runner. He's going to be a factor in a lot of those things. Padrig. God, does anyone love golf more?

No. Does anyone love golf more to Paddardt, Harrington? He's in the middle of an eight-week stretch. Eight-week stretch, made a bazillion dollar, still tinkering, swinging it harder than he's ever before. He will play. He'll be burnhard long. or 2.0. Mm-hmm.

No question. He's great for the game, too. Some of the best interviews. His content is awesome, and he's an elder player. He's absolutely destroying it out there. Pumped for him. It was cool.

But Sleith, the people have been asking for it, okay? We finally delivered, because we got one of our favorite guests ever. Back in studio, baseball legend, Mark Grace joins us on subpar. All right, back by popular demand. We got an icon joining us today. One of the best personalities, arguably the best storyteller in all of sports,

not to mention 16-year big leagueer World Series champion. Mark Grace returns. I can't believe. Good to be back, brother. We've been four years, dude. Can you believe that? Good to see. My man.

Pleasure. It's good, my man. I thought it was like two. I thought it was like two and then it's four. I swear. I thought it was two years ago. It was four years ago that we did the last one. I remember sitting in here.

That's amazing. We're getting old, guys. What I hadn't heard before at the time is the... The Rick Sutcliffe Firework Story, I might tell once a week. You should. It is greatness. And it's a true story. It's so good.

I got a few more Sutcliffe stories, but that's my favorite one because it just makes him look like an idiot, which makes me happy. That makes me happy. I met him when I was like 12 years old. He came to my stepdad's horse ranch. I literally have an autographed baseball from Rick Sutcliffe, and then you told that story, and I'm like, oh, my God. He's actually one of my dear friends, but I also love to make him look like an idiot if I can. That's so good. That's the way it is. Mission accomplished.

By the way, we had John Smolts on a few episodes ago, and I saw you at Whistparov. Smoltsy's awesome. And I said, give me something. You go, I owned his ass. And he didn't have, he agreed with you. Did he? Yep. Right off the jump, yeah.

I will tell you. John Smoltz is one of the best, obviously, Hall of Famer. But Smoltz and great golfer as well. but for some reason I matched up well with him. You know, he threw hard, had great breaking stuff, but for some reason, you know, you golfers, you know, how a course fits your eye, you know, the hell does that mean?

But Smoltsy was that guy for me. You know, I, for some reason, wore him out, and then there was much worse pitchers that wore me out. Yeah. You know, that I had no chance off of, but for some reason, Smolsey was the guy that, you know, I, I wasn't a home run hit. I hit seven home runs off Smolsey in the big leagues and about four more in the minor leagues off of them. You know, just I don't get it.

And I love the fact that he and not. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Like, right off the junk. He's like, yeah. But it's true, though, like for golf, like you can be, you can miss five cuts in a row. And you get to a place you just love and all of a sudden your game turns around. Is that the way it is?

Yes. You might go 0 for 15. And all of a sudden, there comes Smoltz. Bam, we're back. A little slump buster. That's another version of it. Which breaks me out because, like I said, you guys have forgotten more about golf than I'll ever know. But, you know, gosh, I was in over 30s and, you know, I stink.

And I'll tell you a story about Ted here shortly. But did you guys ever go in slumps in golf? Oh, yeah. I missed 10 cuts in a row. I mean, you can't play golf for very long without going in slumps. Really? Oh, okay. Just so.

So what causes a slump? like your driver, your putter, your iron shot. What caught all the above? Anything. Something goes off and then you lose, I think it's a confidence thing. You start to lose confidence. You start expecting to play bad almost more than playing good.

You get in your own head. It's not like you lose your swing. It's not like you change your swing and go over 30. I got in the box, I got in the batters box, and I would take a couple of practice swings, bring it up, look, and I'd say, I got no chance. That's a lot of that over-tree shot.

Like, it didn't matter who was on the mound, a left-hand or a right-hand or an octopus. It didn't matter. Like, somebody on the mound, I'm like, I got no chance. And golf couldn't be that way, too. Oh, yeah, dude. That's not over-shots to this day. There's no way I'm hitting this fairway.

You watch guys. I mean, I mean, like, I would say Spieth's going through it a little bit with the putter right now. Is he's inside of six feet? He's just really struggling right now. You just, you miss a couple, and it just starts getting in that dome of yours. None of us have much going on up there, but for some reason it takes over. Yeah, it looks like, for me, I am such a, I am such a fan of the game of golf. And I don't know about you guys, but I'm kind of a Brooks Kepka fan.

Yeah, yeah. You know, live, whatever. but it looks to me like he's scuffling with the putter. You know. Yeah, he's been in a great. Tita Green, he's dynamite. Yeah. But for some reason, nothing's going or, you know.

Well, tell me how, like, Chuck Knoblock got the yips going from second to first. Steve Sacks. I mean, Chuck Knoblox. It's literally right there. Right there. Throw him the goddamn ball, exactly. You got to memorize Playboy. Get out of that.

Yeah. Rube Baker. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. It's, you know, the mind is, is in baseball and golf. And for me, golf is way more up here than baseball was. Baseball was natural for me.

You know, like, let's do this. Let's just do this. Get in the box. Let's do this. You know, hit me the ball. Let's do this. Golf, you know, it's like, you get over here. Oh, shit.

You know, like, oh, there's water on the left. Or there's, or, oh, there's. you know, trees on the right. Huh? I don't know how you guys do it. It's amazing. You don't react to anything. You do it all.

Everything else you're reacting. That throw you a ball, you react to it. I mean, like one of the best ever do it, Ernie L's. I mean, got the full-blown yips on the first hole at the master's. He's six-piece. He's six-pudded. Literally,

have you seen that clip as far? It's a hard one. And it comes up on Twitter. I kind of just keep, I don't even want to know it's possible. But that's one of the best players ever. He literally looks at his gaddy and he's like, I can't hold it.

You can brush your in from here. So let's just say you do something like that. You got 17 more left. Yeah. What do you guys? What do you do? I don't know. Especially at Augustine.

You've already shot yourself out of the tournament. Tell your caddy to go to the bar and grab you a cocktail. Just slam it. A, you're fired. B. Yeah. Okay. Next question.

Just a little roll reversal. What else you want to know, Gracie? What makes a good caddy? A great player. I love all the caddies, by the way. I think sports. I think a guy that just knows this guy and knows how to get like when to kick him

in the balls, when to pat him on the back and how to get the best out of the guy. Do you ever fire guys? Oh, yeah, of course. Can you ever not fire a guy? Yeah, guys quit on. Everyone is fired eventually. Yeah, I know that feeling. I've been fired as a player,

a minor league coach, a major league coach, a broadcaster. Yeah. Not a husband though. That's good. Oh, no, I'm on numerous. Oh, never mind. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm on number three. I'm on number three. I popped up. I popped up and ground it out. Yeah. I popped up and like a dumbass I got back in the batters spot.

I'm not married. Okay. I'm on. Oh, cool. You didn't do your homework. You didn't do it. I just flew in. Okay.

I run it all the fumes right now. That's all right. You went for the cycle. Get fired. Yeah. Yeah. You know, the old saying, you know why divorce is so expensive? Because it's worth it.

Exactly. I mean, 333 lifetime batting average isn't too bad. Not that bad. Yeah. Yeah. That gets you in the hall. That gets into Cooperstown. Exactly.

Good point. We were talking before the show a little bit because obviously played for the Cubs. Chicago, such a great sports city. It just came out that the Chicago Bears are going to be playing in their new stadium in Indiana. What are we doing? That is. unfathomable. That, that, like, okay, I was in Chicago for 13 years.

There's, okay, it's the blue collar, they love the white socks, and they love the Blackhawks. The white collar, they love the Cubs, and they love the Bulls. Everybody loves the Bears. Everybody loves the Bears, and that they're going to Hammond, Indiana, which is not, you know, it's just across the border, not too far. but that is sacrilege. And in Chicago. Yeah.

That they're not going to be at Soldier Field. That is unbelievable that politics has taken the Chicago Bears possibly out of Chicago. That's nuts. And like Riggly, you pop out, like, fans pop out and there's bars. All right. You're already in the mix. Now it's like the driving back and forth. And they just kind for the first time along that figured out the football part.

They actually got a good product. They got a good team there. And now they're exactly. Now they're messing up the other side. After a lot of down years. Like when I was there, bears are good. You know, we're talking Walter Payton. We're talking Jim McMahon.

You know, some of the great defenders, you know, from Richard Dent, you know, you name it. That sissy, Erlacker. Erlacher. Yeah. Big sissy. Oof. Yeah. He makes me glad I didn't play football.

God, about it. But now they're, now they're trending upward. Yeah. And here we go with this stupid crap. You know, it just doesn't make sense. I'm glad I'm not a politician because I want to be liked. I don't want to be hated. Yeah.

You're way too honest to be in politics. And I mean that with the highest of compliments. Yeah. No, I'm full of shit, but that's okay. That's why we love you, though. Yeah. We feel it. We feel it.

I got a Chicago question, which we didn't, last time you're in here, you told the Michael Jordan Riverboat casino story, which is a fucking classic, which was awesome. I wasn't thinking about it at the time. You were in Chicago when he quit basketball and was playing baseball. Here you are the best hitter in baseball. Did he ever come? Like, did you ever have any baseball interactions with MJ? There used to be a thing in the, at that time when he was playing baseball in Chicago called the Cross Town Classic,

where it was a, it was an off day for both teams. And it was an exhibition game in the middle of the season. And the two, this is before interleague play. So there'd be White Sox, Cubs, and, you know, stars go out there, play a couple of innings, get, you know, get pulled off the field, like a spring training game. But Michael was playing for the White Sox. And here they're at Wrigley Field, packed house because Michael was playing for the White Sox. And sure enough, at about the fourth inning, Michael comes up and the place is just going ballistic, as they should. You know, Michael was a god there.

and still is. And he rips a double down the left field line. And I mean, I played in playoff games in Chicago. I played in huge games. I've never heard it louder in my life. The place was, you could actually feel the place rocking. In an exhibition game.

In an exhibition game. And Michael got ripped a double down the left field line. And I was in the dugout and I'm just like good for him. I mean, that's good for baseball. It's good for Chicago. It's, you know, think about that. You know, there was Bo Jackson. There was Dion Sanders.

But there's not many two sports stars, you know, at the major league level. But Michael was good enough, you know, not to really play in the major leagues, but come up for an exhibition and still get a base hit. Good for him. That's cool. Yeah. Yeah, it's, I couldn't go out and play in the NBA. Go get 25.

Yeah, I guess the next. Go throw up 25. Yeah. You probably could. No, I couldn't. No. No. Well, another legend there in Chicago, the great Harry Carey.

Yes. I mean, we got to get into this. I know you got some great Harry Carrey stories. Well, yeah, did you? I don't know if I told the story about, he, he had a restaurant called Harry Carries in Chicago. And he, he would go there all the time. And I would see him in there all the time. And he had stopped, he had stopped drinking at the, you know, later in his, in his life,

he stopped drinking. And he was, he would drink like, uh, uh, alcoholless wine. Okay. So, you know, basically, basically great juice. Yeah. And. Yeah, well, just. Yeah.

So, so he's telling him Steve. Stone on a broadcast, he goes, hey, Steve, I was at the restaurant and they have these things called seedless grapes. No, there's lots of seedless grapes. So, and Steve Stone says, well, yeah, Harry, you know, through genetics and whatnot, you can, you can get seedless grapes. And he goes, genetics. I thought that was about sex.

on the broadcast. Right on here. Right on the air. Once again, about 30 seconds of silence. You know, because Steve Stowe's just laughing his ass off. So that was the thing about, you know, this iconic Harry Care. You know, I've got lots of stories. I think I told the last one about the couple passionately kissing.

Yes. Yeah. But you can go ahead and tell it again. Okay. Because any Harry Carey story. You're okay with that one again? Yeah. Okay.

So, so during a broadcast, we had a, we had a, we had a, we had a producer that was, oh, just, you know, he's long gone. Unfortunately, his name was Arnie Harris, but, oh, he was a, he was a good old pervert, you know. Good old pervert. Yeah. You know, he was always, you know, finding the best looking, best looking girls in the stands with the biggest boobs, you know, and all. all that stuff. It's summertime in Chicago and the girls are flaunting it as best they can. And so, so anyway, he finds this couple that is, and they're just making out. They're just making out, you know, second inning, making out. Mark Grace double got them going. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah.

It was everything I could do. But, you know, they're making out, you know, not just, we're talking Tonsal hockey, yeah. So, oh, boy, you know, they're having fun at the old ballpark. And then another inning goes, flash, this couple's still making out, you know. So this goes on for a couple three innings and it becomes part of the broadcast. You know, they pitch this couple, pitch this couple. So here he says, Steve Stone, he says, he says, hey, Steve. I think I've finally got this couple figured out.

I think that he's kissing her on the strikes, and she's kissing him on the balls. And he had no idea. No idea what he had just said. And once again, silence. You hear him go, what? God. And the count's three to.

He's getting an earful in his headset. You know, like, you stupid son of him. bitch, what are you doing? He's like, what? He's one of those guys like Barkley. Like, you can't fire him. He's on fire. He's not going to get killed.

He's bulletproof. Not a chance. Yeah. Not a chance. He was the most beloved broadcaster to ever, you know, hold a microphone. Yeah. And I thank God that he was my, you know, my broadcaster for lack of better words. Because I, I can say, Harry Carey called my.

games for over 10 years. That's awesome. And whether I was good or whether I was bad, Harry Carey called my games. So how lucky am I? That's so cool. I would do anything. Can you imagine a pod? Bob Euker, Harry Carey.

Oh, my God. Or Ben Scully. Yeah. Oh, gosh. Have I told you my Bob Euker? So I had hand surgery from Dr. Sheridan here in Scottsdale. One of the best. Yeah.

And so he's got all these jerseys. I'm sure he might have one of years up there if you visit him. Got all these jerseys. Jersey's all over the wall. And I was in his office and he's got a framed picture of Bob Euker on his desk. No kidding. I was like, he's like, I was Bob Euker. I look at it.

It says to Dr. Sheridan, hand doctor. He goes, two Dr. Sheridan. Thanks for the hand job. Bob Euker. I was like, that sounds like you. That sounds like you. It's the best. You know, we just lost you.

Yeah. Not too long ago. He lived a good long life. But just another guy that he wasn't, he really wasn't all. that good of a baseball player. Yeah. You know, he got to the big leagues, but he was a backup catcher, but he became an icon because of what he did with the microphone.

And, you know, you're talking about some of the baseball has, the broadcasting is so important as well as the players are important, the managers are important, but you get an iconic broadcast as beloved. And it's like, it's like. Like, I would watch games just to listen to the, to the broadcaster and hear him talk because, you know, Ben Scully. He painted a picture. Then, oh, gosh, there was a another iconic broadcaster for the Detroit Tigers. Unfortunately, his name's, it's, I'm getting old.

We all are. We'll figure it out. Yeah, we'll figure it out. But I remember one time, listen, I took a called third. Right there. Strike three. I go back to the dugout and I get, I, I heard the broadcast later. He said, Ernie Harwell is the guy's name.

Iconic Detroit, you know, for decades. He goes, strike three called and Grace just stood there like a house on the side of the road. Come on, Gary. Yeah. Come on, Ernie. Give me a brick here. That's funny. So, yeah, that's, that's the fun part of, of, of Bay.

Baseball, you know, there's some fun golf, too. You know, fun golf broadcasters and football, you know, Madden, obviously, is another icon, that kind of stuff. But, yeah, it's, and you're becoming one, dude. You're becoming one. You're really good at what you do. Thank you. Appreciate it. And baseball, they have so much time to kit.

Like, there's so much. So true. So, pitch, ball. 40 more seconds to the next pitch. Like, what is it? That's an art. So when you get a guy like that, that's one of the. those big personalities, like they get to really run because there's so much dead time where they're not calling.

It's not like hockey or shit's just flying. You have no time. Did you watch, is it Brockmeier? Was that the show? Brockmire. So Joe Buck's actually in it. But you need to watch. The last season gets kind of stupid, but it's about this broadcast, baseball broadcaster. And he goes like down to the minor leagues after he gets fired and he's just a drunken disaster.

But I mean, him on the, it's greatness. You would love it. I would love it. Joe Bucks. George Brett. a little cameo in it? Does he? Yeah.

I just randomly stumbled upon it one day and the dude's like girlfriend is cheating on him and it's with George Brett. Come on. I got to nowhere. I was like, oh my God, there's George. Come on. It's good. You like it.

George, Bernda, him and Keith Hernandez are my favorite players. So, you know, we see George all the time. And I'll tell you what, George is in the 70s. He still can play. Dude, he smashes it off the tee. He's still can put, well, he's got the rest of the game too. He smashes it off the 70s. off the T. He's like 73, I think. And I mean, if I hit a good one and he hits a good one,

he's 40 yards past me. And I'm 13 years younger than him. It's impressive. I'm playing his member guest with him in Kansas City in September. Are you really? Yeah. It's going to be great. I like your chances. It's going to be fun. I think you, I think you too might have a chance. Well, the best part with George is if a put lips out, he counts it. He's like, that's a good. I'm like, okay, cool. Yeah, that counts. Yeah. With Nelly Gorda hit that thing yesterday.

And I, oh, my God, by the way, how that put go in. Have you seen the overhead? Yeah. The overhead view, it looks like, I was like, that might graze the left lip. And it somehow. I didn't see it. Damn. She made, she had two feet 10 inches to win the U.S. women's open.

And you never seen. It was a little tuggy. A put. And it went. For how soft it was. It was like maximum amount of, yeah. That was it to a Riviera, right? Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. You've been out there? I have. Twice. I've been to Riviera twice. And the first time I went was probably this probably I was in my 20s, maybe early 30s. Amazing place. I grew up in Southern California. So, yeah.

And me and another guy get invited and you have to play with members. You have to play. So we're playing with two members that we've never met before. And I've got, and it's about the, it's probably the first hole, you know, gosh, if you keep it on the planet, you make par on that, on that first hole. It's a friendly opening. Yeah. And then the second hole is the hardest par four in the world. And so, so on the second hole, I think I'm, I'm on the green in five.

And I mark my ball. And it's, it's like one of those plastic markers with a little, you know, a little small thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I look, you know, and it's white. It's white. And this member, he's got, you know, I marked my ball.

I got a six-footer. This guy's got about a, you know, 12-footer behind me. So I mark my ball. And the member tells me, he says, he says, Mark, he goes, do you have a different marker? Because that distracts me. Oh, dear God. And I, I'm waiting for him to say, ah, I'm just,

busting your balls, you know? Yeah. He was serious. He was serious. And I was like, what do you want? No, I, this is my ballmarker. You know, I, I don't have another.

You got a, you got a penny or something? Give me a penny. So, I'm the guest. So I can't tell this guy to go fuck himself, you know? You could, but it'd be the last time. Yeah.

Exactly. It's probably the last time you played with him anyway after that. So I was just like, I was, like, No, I'm sorry. I don't. So anyway, I was so worried the rest of the, the rest of the round that it just ruined my, I've been wanting to play this course for my whole life. Yeah. And I, second hole? You know, you're dropping that on me?

And it just ruined my whole Riviera experience. Just, damn. We'll go back another time and you can mark it with whatever you want. You know what? Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. It's not against a poker chip.

That's like literally the flat, the flattest, like, least intrusive. It's the size of a dime. Yeah, and it goes in the ground. In the ground. And it wasn't even in his line or anything, but it distracted him. I'm like, you're gonna, you're shooting 92. Yeah, who cares? And this and this distraction.

You're putting for double on two here. That's the thing about, you know, because Riviera's Riviera, you know, there's a lot of snooty, snooty clubs around the, around the country and I've been lucky to play a lot of them. And, and you just, you go by the rules and you do what you're talking. old and and all that. It's, but I'm sorry. If somebody ever comes to,

to our club, you know, a guest of mine or that I've got to play with somebody that I've never met before, I'm never going to drop some shit like that. Yeah. Because I've never even heard of anyone. They're going to be like,

Mark Gray's a freaking jack off, you know? Well, they say that anyway. Yeah, you know, kind of like the coin. It's necessarily.

So, so folks at home, don't do that next time. Next time you have a guest after. Love it. The course is a day. 10. The hangs a little to be desired. It's, for me,

you know, you guys are so good, but for me it was hard. It's hard. Pretty hard course. Very hard course. Pretty tough course. I mean, it's big yard. In that rough? Yeah. Kauia. Yeah. By the way, it also, I mean, I know you didn't see it, but it's

June and they're playing at Riviera. The PGA Tour plays there in February. The way it plays in June, the fact that we're on the West Coast, it was so much better. It was good. It was, it was, very good. It looked good on TV. Well, how good is Nelly? Pretty

fucking good. One of the best, one of the best ever. So I believe now, it's eight tournaments this year. She has four wins, three seconds, and an eighth. Really? Yeah. Golly. Four majors already, and she's got a chance for the next two. She hasn't won so she can get this. If you get

four, they call the Grand Slam. If you get the fifth one, they call it the Super Slam, I think. Well, think about that family. Yeah. Yeah, athletes. ball players. The old man won Wimbledon. Yeah. And then...

Did he really? I knew he was a tennis player. I don't know he won't. He won. I know he won a major. I think it was Wimbledon. Damn. But then, you know, two daughters, professional golfers.

The son is a professional tennis player. Think about that. Yeah. Like, I was a professional baseball player. My two sons, not a chance. I mean, they were okay in high school and all that, but no chance. Like, that family is stupid athletic. Good Lord.

Yeah, that's wild. Genetics. And she, I guess she hits it over 300. She averages like 280 off the tee. Does she really? Yeah. Okay. When you guys were playing, what was your average tee shot?

Well, I was one of the shortest guys out there. I was always like bottom five. I averaged around like 275 off the tea. Okay, so you were bottom five at 275. Yeah. Think about that. Dude, the average now is like 290. No, the average is 300.

Five. Is it really? eight isn't that like dead middle of it no there's 300 call it whatever that's like they're flying at three bills yeah i thought long guys i thought 300 was 111 in the driving distance it might be it's right around three it's all jammed up and like within a five yard gap but it's basically caught 300 average or our boy tim harran lumpy yeah yeah i asked him i asked him played with him a couple months ago and i i had because he was quote unquote long back in the day and i said i said Timmy, what did you average?

He said, I averaged 291. At my peak, I was 291. And he was like in the top five. So now he goes, I would be at the bottom. Oh, yeah. I think the shortest guy is Brian Campbell, and he averages like 282 yards. And he's an outlier. Yeah.

He's well down there. Yeah, I mean, it's just, but it's so different now. I mean, every sport changes over time. But when we grew up. Technology. Yeah. But you also, like, the game is taught different. Like when we, when I learned the game, I was taught how to hit it straight.

Now it's like they teach all these kids, hey, we're going to figure out how you can absolutely smash it and then we'll worry about hitting it straight later. Yeah, we always wind it back. You used to hit down on the driver, hit it spinning out there and just hit controlled shots and keep it in the fairway. Now it's like we tee it high. We try to hit knuckle balls out there and fly at 320. Yeah, that's years ago at Pebble Beach, you know, the range is off campus there. And I'm hitting balls on the range, you know, just because I'm. nervous as hell.

And VJ. Singh comes and puts, you know, puts his bag down. And I'm like, oh, Jesus Christ, you know, I'm hitting balls. And here's BJ Singh. And this is years ago when Vijay was in his prime. And the first thing he did on the range, he broke out his driver and tease up, tees up, you know, just. and chokes down and hits about 15 straight, knock down drivers. Just 15 feet off the ground, you know, just bullets out there.

First clubby yanks, you know, no wedges, you know, none. And I introduced myself and I'm just like, like, you know, most of the good players that I watch on the range, they never first thing they do is break out driver and he says he says mark he says when you play pebble beach you better have that shot right there

he goes because the wind he goes it can he goes it can be blown 45 miles an hour and you better have that drive right there or you're going home VJ was always I thought one of the most misunderstood guys like he was great I loved him

I played a ton of practice rounds with him he was funny talk shit he liked to gamble him and I got along great but everybody always thought he was an ass and I was like dude VJ is fantastic yeah it's it's it's what you read

and what's real are totally different totally different like for instance in baseball Barry Bonds has a bad reputation I love him

I think he's a great guy I think he's a great guy who's always good to me a couple of all-sar games that I got in fortune enough. He was,

you know, my parents, he was great to my parents, you know, you know, so once again, the whole misunderstood thing. You know,

I just, I have nothing bad to say about Barry Bonds, but 90% of the country thinks he's a bad guy because of what he's portrayed as. And, uh,

you know, it's, it's the same thing. Like, I'm not for everybody, but, uh, but the people that,

that, that can deal with me, like you guys, you guys, you guys, you guys, man, You make us feel normal.

I will have your guys' back, and you guys have always had my back. I'll have your guys back forever. Period. No matter what people say. And some of them like Vijay, just hate the media. They don't want to deal with the media. You know what I mean?

So they'll give you a totally different version. Just get me out of here. I give you the bare minimum so I could be done. And then they're off of that. And you're like, that's a great. You know, when you hang with them, you're like, damn, totally different guy. Yeah, exactly. And I don't know what happened.

They said he got caught in the Asian tour doing something wrong, you know, or something like that. man, okay, you know, it's like a female, bringing up old shit. You know? Yep, perfect. I love that. I don't know. I was, I didn't know where you were going to go.

I was like, well, I was waiting for it. And you delivered. Was that when you were at Pebble and he was doing all that, was that, that was the pro am? Didn't you play with Bill Murray? Yeah, play with Bill Murray. Yeah. How was that?

For probably about 10 years. Bill, you know, it wasn't that I was invited. Bill's a big cup fan and got me in there. and uh bill you know playing with bill gosh you know red carpet for everything

you know from the after parties and and all that and and huge galleries you know it's a show it was his show yeah I'm a yeah they they should

it was the Bing Crosby back then it should have been the Bill Murray yeah you know at Pebble Beach but uh he's the most he's he's he's so beloved still is

but back at that time, you know, there's still, you know, stripes and, you know, all the, all, all his movies. Caddyshack. You know, so, so every time, every time you're over, you know, and Bill can just kind of sit there and look, and people start laughing. He doesn't say a word and people start laughing. That's what he brings to the table. and so he's he just abuses people just abuses people and they love it they just love it you know guys would come guys females they come out on the green you know we're Scott Simpson and

Jeff Sloan and David Edwards you know whoever I was playing with like they'd be ready to put some lady would run out on the green and hugging you know or something like that oh okay I'm going to have to back off this, but, but, but, you know, Bill, Bill, uh, got pissed off at, uh, at, uh, vice president Quayle because Quayle was, was, was over a two-footer in front of us. He was over, over a two-footer out at, uh, oh, gosh, what's the name of that, that place? It's, it was spyglass, pebble, and. Poppy. Poppy, poppy. Poppy, else. Yeah.

So there's, you know, they've got like 12 par threes on that course. And he's over a two-footer, and he's over for like five minutes, lining it up, and getting back in him, finally Bill screams at him. And I guess. That didn't go over too well? It didn't. It went over like a fart in church. Yeah.

And so Bill got reprimanded, and of course that gets me reprimand. I didn't say anything. I can't be responsible. I didn't do anything. But he just, he can do whatever he wants in that tournament. Oh, yeah. And, you know, abused fans, abuse me.

He slapped me in the face one time. You know, I hit a bad shot on the T-box on, it was 14 pebble, the par four. Isn't it before the par five? 14 is the par five. 13. 13. that 13 that. I had a bad tea shot and he just comes up in front of God never just slaps

shit out of me. And I was just like, boom. I'm like, what are you going to do? What are you just deal with it? And I got a, I got a red mark out of a handprint on my face. But that's that's Bill Murray. Sometimes you got to get slapped and deal with it. It's sad that that tournament's not like that anymore. Like, I mean, Saturday at Pebble Beach was just such a great day. Yeah, I mean, like, like, Nancy and it was, but they would sit on 17 and the celebs would come through, but like, I mean, it was a pain in the ass to play because, I mean, it took six hours, but it's still, I mean,

that's what that tournament was about. Yeah, it was a long day. Like you walk in the tap room at night, and I mean, the people you see, it's just like, holy shit, this is unbelievable. How good was that? I remember Mike Weir was in there, was in there having dinner and myself

and a buddy of my mom, mine and Dan Patrick. Yeah. He was there. And we just started, I swear, I swear, there was no alcohol involved. Right. They don't serve that to tap room.

We started singing, Oh, Canada. Yeah. You know, like, we stood up, put her hands over our, okay, our home and native. And Mike Weir was just, he loved it. That's awesome. He loved it. The whole thing, because I know the, I know the song. because I played in Montreal in Toronto, so you learn the song.

And just the stuff, oh my God, the stuff that goes on in the tap room. If those walls could talk, I mean, it would be the greatest book ever. Can you imagine, you know, back in the Clambake days or whatever? Wow. And I'm involved in some of those shenanigans, too, trust me. And, yeah, my God. Yeah, like that and the hope back in the day. Thank God there was no cell phones back then.

Yeah, it was back when it was good. You got some fun. You could not be all over the internet. Exactly. Yeah. But I mean, too, it's obviously changed a lot now. It's a signature event and all this, but he'd walk in there. I mean, Costner at one table.

Yeah. You know, Canelo Alvarez is sitting over here at another one. Bill Murray. Yeah. I mean, Andy Garcia is just like, good, this is so cool. Exactly. And they're all just sitting there drinking and having fun. Drinking and having them.

Hooting it up and having a good time. Exactly. And then, you know, staying in there until they kick you out. And then you got a 7 o'clock tea time the next morning. Let's go get them. Yeah, those were a little rough. Yeah, it could be a little chilly, a little windy after one of those, too. But I wouldn't have it any other way.

Yeah, that just feels weird being signature. Like, that's kind of the vibe you think of when you think of that term. And then to make it like back off of that. So it's a little weird. There's a lot more of those now, right? Signature to see. There's more coming. So what is, who's in charge of that?

The PGA, the commissioner? So basically, I mean, the PGA tour pitches it to their sponsors. if you want to be a signature event, this is what it's going to cost. And so it's up to the sponsor if they want to go to that level. I mean, it's a big ticket. It's a hard sell. $25 million compared to, you know, 10 to 12 if you're just a regular event. Okay.

So what's the next event? I know you just came from Memorial, yeah, which is a quote unquote signature event. Okay, what's the next year? Canada. Yeah, RBC Canadian Open. Is that a signature? No. Okay. So RBC actually sponsors two tournaments.

They have the Canadian Open. and then they also have Hilton Head, RBC Heritage. That's a signature event the week after the Masters. Gotcha. So think of it. They put up $40 million a year probably to sponsor two tournaments. Yeah. It's again, that signature event.

Basically, if you're a company and you want to be a signature, you sign up, but it's a big ticket. It's like Phoenix, like Phoenix doesn't need to be a signature. They still get the best players no matter what. And we want a full field too. You want golf all day long out there. We don't want 72 guys. Yeah. So you were talking, Harbor Town.

I played Harbor Town a couple years ago for the first time. I was very excited. That is also a very hard golf course. That's a sweet course. It's so cool. It's so different than anything else. And you know what they got at Harbor Town? Trees.

Alligators. Oh, yeah. Like if I hit one in the water, close to the water, I'm like, yeah, there's a gator. There's a gator there with his mouth open. I'm like, Jesus. So I ask this on air because I'm very confused. I want to know how they figured this out because, you know, they say if an alligator comes chasing you, you're supposed to like zigzag. Zigzag.

So how the fuck they figure that out? They have one guy run straight, one guy zigzag and the guy ran straight died? I just, I don't understand how this is a foolproof plan. That's the ultimate question right there. Who figured that out? Yeah. Yeah. So one guy survived because he ran a zigzag.

Yeah. And they're like, yep, that's what you got to do every time. Yeah. But 17 in Harbortown is one of the hardest part three. I've ever played in my life. It's one of my favorite golf courses in the world. They don't make them like that anymore. Yeah.

And it's a great week. Coming off the Masters. I can imagine. I mean, it's just, it's laid back. Like you stay there in C. Pines. They have great crowds. Quarter deck. I mean, it's a fun game.

Yeah. I can imagine. Love it. You just got back from one of the hardest, if you were just talking to hardest courses. Didn't you just take a little jaunt up to PV? High Valley? Yeah.

Yeah, I got back. You take that place to its knees? Yeah. Yeah. My, my buddy's, and I, I have a buddy that's a member at Pine Valley. And he's also a member at all of just so many terrific courses across the country. But he's at Pine Valley.

His name is Peter McDonald. And he's been inviting me to Pine Valley for 25 years now, even more. So I've played a lot. Once again, that's a hard course. Oh, man. Maybe the hardest, yeah. And we, we play. We play.

And there's, you know, you have to be, you know, you've got to behave yourself there. You can't, you know. I will say for what you think going in, like how buttoned up it is. They do let, they have fun, though. You got to wear the entire, but you have a good time there. Yeah. Yeah, you got to be in a coat and tie, you know, and all that. But, but you're right.

You're right. So, so anyway, we were just there a couple weeks ago, played. and unfortunately the weather didn't really cooperate. It was in the 40s and rainy, kind of rainy. I probably played easy. Yeah. Yeah. So a hard course just played, you know, nuclear.

And especially with my game. And the one, you know, you have to walk it. And it's like you're walking on a beach. It's not an easy walk. No, not at all. It's not an easy walk at all. So, you know, so, yeah. So, but when you guys play Pine Valley, it's, is the long par three number five?

Mm-hmm. Okay. What do you guys hit there? Oh, I've hit three with their hybrid, yeah. You had hybrid? I played, I played the, not the front, but the, you know, not the, not all the way back. The next box up isn't even that much further up, though, on that hole. If you're playing that.

Driver, full driver. Yeah. I believe it. Full driver for me. me. And, and, and, but so do you know, you know, the, the whole where there's two greens, the short number four, number, number, number, there's two greens. You know, there's a, there's a snack shack and, you know, over on, over on the right there. I hammered my drive right into that. No way. Hit the shack? How that's really not. Play, Mark. I hit the shack. Shouldn't be,

what? Shack shouldn't be in play. What club? Because it's not driver probably. It was a rescue. Yeah. It was a rescue. I'm trying to hit something about 205, 210. Yeah.

I hit 210 miles an hour right into that shack. I got there and because I'm going to get a refreshment. God was like, was that you? That was me. Should you find a Titleist four? Yeah. Exactly. Exactly.

So. Can I get a transfusion and maybe a title of four anywhere on there? Yeah. So, see, I hit a shack that should never be in play by, by anybody. But the stories that you hear from Pine Valley, from Jay Siegel, you know, to all these, these terrific players and whatnot. And that 18th hole might be the best. It's really cool.

They got 18 Phenomen. That's what makes that play so cool. It was like, you could tell me, your favorite hole, we go around the room, and it might be 12 different. Every, you know, and I'm lucky to have played it and played it a lot that the, you know, the driving range is, everything's amazing there. The short course, that mimics the whole. It's so fun.

It's so fun. And you can cruise around that thing. Play it from wherever you want. It's so good. We took a trip a couple years ago with Trias. We had two groups, we had eight of us. And we went to the short course with some refreshments and did. did four on four worst ball scramble.

What is that? So, I mean, we all hit. So, like, say you have a 10-footer, right? The first three guys make it. Well, the fourth guys to make it are you're putting from that one. I mean, if you hit it. If he rolls it five feet by, now you all got to go make a five-footer. I mean, if you hit a wet shot, whatever one's the shittiest wet shot, you have to play from there.

I've never laughed so hard about it. That sounds fun. It was greatness. And to watch guys, like Charlie V was on the trip, like him to have to chip when it actually mattered and everything. That sounds so much. Greatness. You need nobody.

behind you if you're ever going to play four on four. I mean, you can hit three perfect drives and then dude, hi y'all's at the middle of shit. You got to go play that one. Yeah. It's greatness.

Yeah. It is fun. That short course is so sweet. Yeah. That's usually the thing. We'll fly in because, you know, you're going across the country from Phoenix. So you fly in,

you get your stuff, and then you go play the short course. Yeah. And then that's your first day. And then, you know, the next couple days, you go do your thing. and it's how about that place too like you it's even finding pine valley yeah you go through a carnival

when you turn right at the water break are we in the right place yeah it is legitimately the other side of the tracks yeah if you're so sweet it's like you wouldn't even if if if you didn't if if you had never played it before you're like where are we going yeah and and and and there it is The night putting if you stay on site. Oh, yeah, that's fun too. You have good games. We stay on site, too. So some of the cabins have putting greens behind them.

And the light stay on to like 1.30 in the morning. You know what? And there's like multiple houses around. So it'll be like two groups. They got there. You can grab some wine, whatever your drink is. I'm going to tell my God, next time. Yeah.

It's a good. It just doesn't stop there. You mentioned hitting the shack on eight. First time I went there with a group. It's our first day. We did exactly what you talked about. Played the short course the night before, for dinner.

Here we are, dude, we're at a pint. We got a hundred different bets, all this stuff going on. That fourth hole, which is a monster, and we're playing it all the way back.

Monstrous hole, that long part four. The clubhouse on the right. We got a guy that's a little towy hooky on the, off the tee. So he's way back there from the back to you, which is, you know,

he can't even see the green. He's got up there. He's got some sort of lumber. Like he's way back there. And I'm looking at him. I'm looking back there. I'm like, dude, if he just blocks this.

He can't see anything either. I was like, This is going in the clubhouse. Like for sure. You know, this is very in play here for this shot. He gets up there. You hear it, whack. Starts coming up looking over the hill.

I'm looking. I'm like, that's going to hit the clubhouse. It's going to hit the clubhouse. Hits the car path or the road or whatever. Slams into the clubhouse. Loudest noise you've ever heard. We played three holes on property. It's his first time there ever.

And it's like, you've never seen a guy more shook in his life. I think we're on to shoot late. He's a scratch player. He's probably shot 87 and just never recover. I was like, dude. The only one did that clubhouse. Dude, you can't be at the first day on property. You should have.

It was anyways, that can happen, though. You're not the first one. I'm sure to hit the building. So I had somebody, uh, thought he was a good player. And he's like, oh yeah,

I'll break 80 here. I'm like, yeah, yeah. He shot like 93. Oh, yeah. You know,

he was like a three handicapped, something like that. He just got his ass kicked. Place is freaking hard. Yeah. I've made two, two trips and both trips someone had a hole in one.

Really? No shit. Tanigawa number 10. What a great hold out of one. And then Ricky Fowler. Ricky Fowler. That's right. Yeah.

Three down there on the left. I can see that happen because everything falls down to the left. The best part. So I was in the group in front, but we heard them. It was like Justin Thomas, Ricky Fowler, and two others, and they filmed it. And they got it on freaking film. The Caddy filmed him. Yeah.

The caddy filmed it. And you can hear Justin Thomas at Lanz. He goes, that's in. That's in. That's in. catches the slope and went in and oh my god and by the way one more thing on pine valley number 15 the par five yeah that should be a par eight that is that is that should be a part of the realest par five of all time oh my god everything's going off to the right you you hit one in the middle

it goes off in the rough you hit your second shot in the middle it goes off into the rough it's and you got to hit long clubs just to get up there and then you've still got 200 yards in yeah yeah So, yeah, I'm sure you guys have handled it before, but that's, that whole is insane. So I think they give you a flag if you make an eagle. And, uh, Eagle or a whole on one. I know you get a flag for one. You're not putting it. You're not putting for Eagle.

You're not knocking in for 150 yards. Smiley was on, Smiley Coffin was on our trip and he was struggling so bad. He made one birdie in two days and he went in the shop and asked if he got a flag for his birdie. It is one birdie hold out a bunker shot, I believe. Birdie on five? Yeah. Where's my flag?

I need my flag for my bird. It's good. It's the best place. I got a baseball question. What do you got? I know you actually, and I love asking the baseball guys. That's because we all just respect greatness in our sport.

And what Shoahe Otani does. I just, I need to hear your thoughts on this because it's just, it's something we've never seen before. That's true. Cool. And I don't think in our lifetime, I'm 61 years old.

You guys are much younger. but I know I won't, and I don't think you guys will, ever see another talent like we're seeing in Shohei Otani. He is the best baseball player ever. Damn. Right now. Ever. Right now.

And you're talking to a guy that played in the big leagues for 16 years. No, not right now. No, I mean, if his career ended today, you'd say he's the best baseball player ever. Babe Ruth was also a pitcher and a good one. he's better, he's better than Babe Ruth, in my opinion. He is the best baseball player that has ever lived. He's still young. You know, this guy's hitting 50-some-odd home runs a year.

He, when he gets on the mound, he's got, you know, his ERA right now is 0.6. Yeah. Like you can't hit him, you can't get him out. He's hitting over 300. He, this guy's a, joke. See, for guys like him, okay, and there's never been a guy like him, but, you know, baseball's easy for him. You know, golf is easy for you guys. But, but baseball is so, majorly, if there was another level, he would be on it because nobody else can touch this guy.

He, you know, I'll say, I'll name three guys that made baseball look easy. King Griffey Jr. Alex Rodriguez, Barry Bonds. Baseball was easy for those guys. They can't sniff Otanin because these guys didn't pitch. He's the best pitcher in the game

as well as the best hitter in the game. What do you do? Kiss my entire ass. Yeah. I don't know. Was it game six in LCS last year? He pitched like seven shutout innings and then was four for five with like three home runs.

Yeah. Bombs. Yeah. Decent game. So, so, prior to his last start against the Diamondbacks where he threw six shutout he

the other two times he had pitched he pitched the the ending the top of the first and then let off the bottom of the first with a home run twice two straight games pitch shut out hit a home run to lead off the game

two games in a row I mean this guy honestly like watch him any chance you get because this guy, in our lifetime, you're never going to see anybody like this. I'll never forget that NLCS last year.

That was just, man. He is, he's that good. That's why I got paid $700 million. I was down on the field. Deferred, though. Yeah. Yeah, he's barely getting by right now. But guess what?

When you get it deferred, you get interest. Mm-hmm. So interest on that kind of money is a lot. So also, I was down on the field, you know, around the batting, Cage. He's huge. Yeah. He's so much bigger than you think. He's a big man. Yeah. And

I haven't spent any time with him, but I have heard that he is just a great guy. I've heard he's just a jolly, fun guy. Which makes me happy to hear that. So, like, Justin Upton obviously played with him for the, when he puts on the

Angels and Mike Trout, and they all, they rave about him. They say he's funny, great dude, just as good as they get. And other than that, he's not shit. Yeah. Yeah. And he happens to be really fucking good. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. I just love getting people's perspective on like those things. He's the best player I've ever seen and quite possibly the best player ever. I mean, like you see Scotty Sheffler now. Like, I mean, he's freaking phenomenal. Right. But then you just go back and like you watch Tiger like in 2000. And it's just like,

you're in awe. As a guy who's trying to compete against him, you're just like, like everyone can do what Scottie Sheffler does. He just does it better more often than that. Yeah. People could not do what Tiger Woods did. In this current time, right. So I remember talking to Roger Malby years ago. God, what a good guy. I can imagine. Love him.

And I said, okay, Roger, I asked him the golf question, like the golf, you know, like the geek I am. You know, if you had a, if your life depended on it, who would you want hitting a T-shot for you? He said, Nicholas. I said, okay. Who would you, you know, from, from, from. 170 in who would you want who would you want he goes nicholas i said okay uh you know 20 footer if your life depended on who is you want he goes nicholas and i'm sure our day and age we we would say that about tiger probably right of course yeah and and now it's probably

sheffler yeah i mean it's just yeah it's so different i mean actually sheffler i wouldn't put at the level of Tiger and Jack yet. I mean, obviously the game's changed a lot too, and it's so deep now. But he's getting there. I mean, what he does is just absurd. But, like, I always tell everybody that, and I don't think, like, it's not must-see TV all the time with Scottie. Because like I said, every player can do what he does.

Right. He's just better at it. Like, Tiger was hitting shots that the rest of the field sitting there like, well, I can't do that. There's a reason Roger said it's not a fair fight at Pebble when he hit it out of the rough on the sixth old. How about that? I mean, did the shots of the night, you know, you go back to the bridge store,

or Canada, the shot over the bunker, like, he's just hitting stuff that, like, it's like awe-inspiring. The shot is just like, bam, bam, bam, bam, never mess up, never mess up, grind you down, it's over. Right. And I still remember that Canada shot, you know, from the bunker. You know, you guys can, I've never played that course. You guys have, I'm sure you guys can appreciate that shot more. I've been in that bunker.

I never looked at the degree. Did you think about going? No, it was, let's lay it up over there. lay up over there. Yeah. And he hammers six iron right out of 12 feet. Yeah, he could go an hour and just talk.

I remember the bunker shot he hit down in Mexico City where he was like standing outside of it and fell in. And the one in a, you know, snap sliced 30 yards and lands and spins right to the, just stupid shit that like no one would even try and he was pulling it off. I think the best one was 18 at Hazeltine. He hit the three iron out of the left brain side bunker over a lip that you couldn't

get a nine iron over. And he hit three iron ball way below his feet. And he hit 15 feet and made bird. They had the U.S. Amateur there two years ago, and they had all the kids try to go recreate it. They couldn't even get over the lip.

Couldn't do it. I think he says that's his best shot. Yes, really? I think it's like the best in terms of difficulty pulling it off all of it. So because... I didn't even win that one.

Because of that, what do you think? Because he just knows he's so goddamn good. You know, like you said, you couldn't get a nine iron over. He's like, he's telling his caddy. He's telling Williams,

give me a three on it. Yeah. Those are the things he did. like it would randomly pop up on Instagram like from back when he was really going and that's when he carried that two iron and he would hit these two irons 150 feet in the air I mean it looks like most guys wedge

from 240 and comes down just like a butterfly of sore feet and you're like okay no one else yeah that's not going to beat that yeah I'm not gonna beat that yeah some of my mirrorfield they were just show it like the ones on 11 I mean hitting these rocket two irons McCord tells a great story about Firestone

how Farity's down on the ground with him hardcore by the way and I think it was the ninth hole he hit it way left off the T and McCord's like, what's he got down there? And he's like, dude, he's got nothing. This is a pitch out. Like, he's got a tree in front of him, the rough six inches long.

He's got 182 yards and he gets a signal. It's a pitching wedge. And he takes this pitching wedge and he swings at 160 miles an hour. Launches up in the air and goes to like three feet. And he had his, Farity had his mic, I guess, open.

And Ernie L's is playing with me, walks by and Ernie goes, what the fuck was that? Like, I mean, it's just, he's like, it's not possible.

That's the thing. A Hall of Famer like Ernie L. is in disbelief of that. And I met Tiger one time, one time at Pabble. And he was so cool. You know, you guys met him and know him. He was so cool. I expected him to be like a little, like, snootier.

No, he was so cool. He was. I liked him a lot. He's a sports fan. Yeah. He knew about baseball and all that stuff. Yeah. He was just such a cool guy.

He's what I would say, he's one of us. I like, what you open with with Tiger. You should go, hey, are you doing? I'm Mark. No. I didn't catch your name. Yeah. I'm sorry.

And you are. Yeah. But he was just really cool. But he's one of those guys like, I've gotten a chance to spend more time around him. I'd say since I've switched to the media side. Right. he's been unbelievable, but he's still one of those guys when he comes around, like the other players get excited.

They get giddy. I mean, it's freaking Tiger Woods. Who is that for you in baseball? Nolan Ryan. Oh, yeah. He was an intimidator. Robin Ventura. That's right.

Yeah. That's right. And, you know, I've played with a couple of Hall of Famers like Andre Dawson, right, you know, unfortunately late Ryan Sandberg. And, but when we, you know, Dwight Gooden. Bo Jackson? Oh, Bo's great.

I got a Bo Jackson, Nolan Ryan's story. He told me. Oh, they used to go at it. Yeah, I could tell. It was fastball, fastball, fastball, and it was hearty swings and misses and homers. And it was a who's dick is a bigger contest. I think Bose was from what I saw in the locker room one day.

I just said, I think Bose was from what I saw in the locker room one day. You saw a locker room? That's about Bo Jackson story. Oh, split in charity, but I walk in And his locker's next to mine And he's just sitting there butt naked on a fucking bitch I was like How you doing, Bowman?

Go change the shoes over here. What is that? I'm cool. You're traveling with your back? I'm going to get. Yeah, he sponsored by Louisville Slugger. Oh, fucking. Never thought we'd get to that of this story.

Speaking of that, though, he told me like, I got to play golf with them a year or two ago or something. We were playing it. It was really cool. They just like, fuck, dude. This is Bo Jack. accident, you know, and he got talking about Nolan Ryan. Can you play? Huh?

Dease? I mean, dude, he looks like he could rush, rush for about 125 tomorrow. Oh, dude, he's a truck. Like, looking at his arm. I was like, dude, we're not the same. We are not the same species. Go ahead. I'm sorry. But he had a better. No, we just got talking about baseball. I don't know how we got into it. He's talking about, started talking about Nolan Ryan and all this stuff. And he's like, I got a lot of, like, memorabilia and stuff. I don't really care about much. He's like, I hit one off in Nolan.

I think I asked my biggest bomb maybe he ever hit or something. I hit one off in Nolan Ryan. And I got done. I trot around those bases. I got and I grabbed the bat and I looked at it. And you could see the spalding from the, it was imprinted. Like I imprinted the on the barrel of the bat and he kept it or something. But it was like very clear to me. He's like had something with Nolan Ryan.

Obviously I didn't like, wasn't tracking it at that age. But it was pretty, that was the one he's like proud of. And he had a lot of bombs. But Bo, Coltsaw's hammer in real life. Which is a better story. Way, impressive. Fuck. They don't have spalding ingrained?

I don't know. I don't want to talk about it. My bats didn't have that. No, dude. But Bo was a freak. Yeah. As far as athlete. You know, he was so big and so strong and so fast.

Like, he did a routine ground or short and beat it out. Yeah. You know, and then hit one 500 feet. his next time up off somebody like Ryan. And, but Bo one time, I'm playing first base. Now, Bo is a right-handed hitter. I'm playing first base. So I'm opposite field.

We're playing, and Bo hits a ball. And I see that, you know, I'm playing back. I'm not holding anybody on. I'm a good 110 feet from home plate. and he hits a ball it's a blur and it's about right here okay it's about right here

and it it whizzes past me and I go it got past me before I could get my if he had hit that ball that much good

like he kills me he kills me with the line drive that's how hard he hit this ball I'm surprised that doesn't happen more exactly With the pitchers, like we have a friend Brandon McCarthy, you got clock with one. I feel like it happens like once a year.

There's so many close calls like it's just this far off. The line's shocked. It doesn't happen. What's the ball? What's the baseball exit velocity on like a hard hit liner at the pitcher's sense? Anything over 100 miles an hour is hit hard. It's hit hard. So Bo is probably at a hundred.

Five or above is considered hard. You know, you'll see some balls like in the in the 110 to 115. You know, some of the high-end hitters like Otani or somebody like that. Yeah. For the dimebacks, they got a guy named Marte that can get it up there like that. To those kind of exit velocities. Now, speaking of exit velocity, in golf, is there metrics now in golf like there is in golf like there is in baseball?

Like saber metrics and stuff like that. it's like exit velocity. Oh, yeah. Launch angle. And all of it. They want a certain launch angle with a certain spin. You got all the ball speed numbers and stuff. Like they're all looking to hit like, like you said earlier, like high knuckle balls is what you want to hit.

Really? They just stay in the air. You don't come down. And roll out. And roll. Yeah. Okay. That's kind of what you're looking for.

They're looking like a certain launch and then spin. Okay. So, but it really doesn't matter what course you're playing. Well, I would say like I do know there's guys that will switch to like maybe a shorter driver or a spinnier driver if there's actually rough. Yeah. Like the PJ Tour just doesn't play a lot of rough anymore. And so it's basically just send it as far as you can.

Now, like last week at Memorial, we had some rough. So fairways actually mattered. Colonial, Fairways actually mattered, which was nice. But for the most part, it's just tea it hides. They got every piece of information you'd ever want. Would you guys rather play a shopmaker's course like that? Yeah. Or let's just bomb it.

No. I like the old school course. Like you mentioned probably one of my favorite ones on tour. There's nothing like it anymore. I'm not a big fan of when they go in. take all the trees out of these places and stuff like that. I think it just, it makes, changes the golf course so much.

Why would they do that? I'm not an architect. These people like, long drives. The trees are, they like John Daly and they like, they claim it's for growing situations. It's hard with the shade and then the grass doesn't get the sun and then it dies

and it looks like, trees are tough to keep your course looking. Yeah, but they also say, if they have a ton of shade. They're restoring it. They go back to like the original design and there was no trees because they just built this,

this big piece of land, but they planted trees. So they intended them to be there at some point. And now they take them all down and it's like, why do these guys shoot 30 under par every week? Yeah, I'm sorry. That's bullshit. Yeah. Tell them, Gracie. It just is.

It's bullshit. Yeah. Gracie for commish. You got to figure it out. What's the handicap at right now? Eight. Okay. Eight.

That's solid. It's, uh, no. A travel eight. No, no. It's a good digit. It's not solid. It's not solid. Yeah.

Like I said, you take an eight to Pine Valley? That place is different. Thanks for coming, drive home safely. Yeah, you're done. You know. Take a scratch to Pine Valley. Yeah, I mean, 80. Exactly.

And that's the last time I played. But at Whisper, yeah, I'm a solid eight. Yeah, it's a dangerous eight. Make a bunch of cars. Exactly. Some messups. Get a few pops here and there. You know.

Getting that big wallet of B-O-B. You get lost in there. Exactly. Yeah, I was going to say, that's a big wallet. You got any, like, member guests or anything coming up? I know you worked during the season, but you get out. This time of year, especially out here, you know, it's getting hot. But I think I'm going to go up to Santa Rosen playing one with my high school buddy, or I'm sorry, my college buddy that belongs up there.

There's a member guest in August, something like that. In Santa Rosa, I'm sure you guys have been there, but that time of year, it's still like 65 degrees. Get out of here. Yeah. Get out of here. It's too damn hot. So I think my playing days are kind of coming to a close here out here for a few months. You got to want it to get out here right now.

Yeah. You know, I love to play, but not when it's 110. The problem is, I have a feeling we have this in common. Our other hobbies aren't too good. That's so true. If you take away golf. It's a big problem. Gambling.

Dranking. So what is your guys as cut off as far as temperature? Oh, I don't care. I'll play. You'll play anywhere. Because I don't know, it's hot on the East Coast.

I would rather play in 110, which I do and, you know, have and we'll continue to. Cold is where I don't, I ain't getting out there in that. If it's like breezy at all and it's in the 50,

I just like, nah, I don't. Like this heat here. We get so much good weather. Doesn't bother me. Like, I go to,

you go to Florida or like even, I grew up in Dallas. I mean, when it's, 98 in the humidity. I'm like, this sucks. Your hand,

you gotta wear two gloves. Switching gloves every shot. I mean, no. This doesn't bother me out here. It's freaking hot, but I'll still be. But you can get through it.

Yeah, and you get out early out here, it's really not. If you're not a car, like it's not that bad. You're going to go play two in the afternoon. Probably not going to want to do it. Yeah.

7 a.m. You're done by 10 because nobody's out there. You can cruise. Yeah. Cruise. Yeah. Exactly. So,

so now I'm going to tell you, you want to ask me the wrestling story. Yeah, I was going to get to. Here we got one more. I need to hear about Dale the demon Torborg. Is that my saying that right? The demon.

Who is this person? We're about to find out. I Googled him. You got to look him up. Okay. I shot Sleez, a Texas morning. I said, Google Dale Torborg, aka the demon. He was a professional wrestler.

But anyway, in my playing days in the 90s, we go to New York. play against the Mets, and their manager, this guy, it was Jeff Torbork was the manager of the Mets. And he has a son that was his strength coach, Dale Torbord. So we're out running our sprint. You know, when you run your sprints right before the game, you know, your strength coach is out there helping you stretch and, you know,

they're just out. out there. And across the field, their strength coach, the Mets, you know, the guys are running their sprints. And this guy is just enormous. And he's got long hair down to his ass. And I'm like, who is that big bastard over there? Like, who is that? And they're like, oh, that's that's Torborg's son. He's their strength coach. He's also a professional wrestler. That's the demon. The demon. You know, and come to find. out he was a professional wrestler called the demon he kind of he kind of had a face paint like jean simmons yeah he paints like kiss yeah yeah so so anyway i'm like okay you know i mean this guy's

enormous so so anyway about the third fourth inning we start beamballs are starting to happen guys are getting hit retaliation and and all that well i'm playing first base and we hit one of their guys and here we go. And it's a good one. It's a good one. You can look it up. And it's an all-out brawl. Dugouts clear.

Dougouts clear. And it's not one of those where everybody's slow dancing out there. It's like, boom, and you're getting hit. You know, it's one of those. It's a good one. It's a pier six brawl.

And so what happens in, in baseball brawes a lot of times, the pile moves. Like, you know, somebody will get going over here so you move over there. Well, anyway, the Mets had this little prick.

Mani Alexander. And he's running around the pile suckering guys. You know, he's suckering my teammates. He's sucker punching my teammates running around the pile, pow, me and another guy, we grab

Mani, and we start giving it to him. Like, it's two on one, it wasn't a fair fight, but he was suckering guys. He had to pay. So now the pile moves to the backstop. Okay?

And now I'm hitting Manning Alexander as hard as I can, it's always going to be a left with me. I'm left hand, it's always going to be a left. This one, no thanks. So all of a sudden, out of nowhere, I get grabbed by the throat by this meat hook that was so big, bang, it's this goddamn demon. And I'm up against the backstop, and he grabs me, and I weigh 200 pounds. And by, with one hand, he lifts me up against the backstop

off my feet. I can't get a toe hold. Okay, I'm up against the backstop. And he's got me like this. And he rears back. Oh, God. I'm like, I just went. I'm about to die.

And he punched me in the forehead. So hard. If you punch me in the nose of the mouth, I'm a dead man. He punched me in the forehead. And I'm seeing stars. I didn't leave my feet, but he punched me. I'm like, okay. But after he punched me, he goes, knock it off.

You got it, sir. Yes, sir. Mr. Damon. Yes, sir, you big bastard. So he let me back down, and I'm done. I'm seeing stars. Like, I've never been punched that hard in my life. And I was, after the game was over, for about a week,

I walked around with four knuckle marks right in the middle of my forehead. You know how hard you got to punch a guy to leave four? Leave four. Usually one or two. He left foot. That's how hard he punched me. And to this day, look him up. The demon, Dale Torborg.

He's a big son of a bitch. And that wasn't fake. That's a knock it off. There should be a rule against professional wrestlers being able to get in the bench-clearing brawes. Exactly. He, I've never been putting it. I'm telling you, if he punched me in the mouth or the nose, my career's over.

Game over. You just took a little concussion. Yeah. Rubbed some dirt in it. I was seeing stars, man. That big bastard got me. That's hilarious. It's online.

I can go find it if I, I don't know if you can see the punch, but the fight. But the actual brawl. Yeah. You can find it. It's mid-90s, Cubs versus Matt's brawl. You'll see me. Dale, the demon, tour. He probably tells all his friends and I've fucked up, Mark Grace.

That little idiot. He punched me hard. That's hilarious. Well, Gracie, we've got to do this again. Let's not wait four years. Exactly. What are you doing tomorrow? Enjoy it, ma'am.

You're the best, Gracie. Appreciate you, you, brother. You know, I love you guys. Let's get out and play, even in the hot one of these days. You tell us when. Love it. Good to have you back, though. All right, that was the one and only, Mark Grace, joining us on subpar.

The man never disappoints. I did laugh. really hard. I had no idea. We were talking about getting fired from jobs. He's like, I've been fired from everything. And I met his wife recently in Las Vegas. We were on the same flight. I was like, well, you haven't gotten fired from for marriage. He goes, what are you fucking talking about? I'm on my third one. I was like, dude, no. I don't know if he did the fire in or he got fired, but it ain't his first rode. He's the fucking best. I, we're a lot, like we get it. There's a lot of cool

dudes around town. We play golf with them. I mean, he and George Brett, like, together. We say it all the time. Like, the old dudes that came from that generation, also, like, they'll come on here and they'll tell crazy stories because they don't give a shit. They don't have a AT&T sponsorship that they got to worry about or anything like that. Dude, they're just, man, he is, he, if you get a chance to hang with Mark Grace, it's a good day because he's so fud, loves golf, always, like, happy, got the best stories in the world. Like, dude, we'll run him back again, by the way. Like, we've gotten some great stories.

Dale the demon, by the way. Tough one to run into when you're getting into a brawl. But dude, I mean, he's just, he's all world. He's so good. Love hanging with him. He is our only guest ever, the first episode he showed up to with a piece of paper with the stories he wanted to get to written down. I was like, that is a professional right there. When I was coordinating with him, he's like, remember to ask me this?

Remember to ask? I was like, I wish we had more guests like you did. Like normally we got to like pry and text all their friends and call him. And he's like, no, dude, ask me about Dale the demon. I asked me about that day. I'm like, you got it. You got some good Jordan stuff in there. I mean, forget, like, because he's such an awesome dude.

Like he was a fucking star. Oh, God. Yeah. Like a stud. But Jadis, they did it a different way back then, man. And it's the best. Yeah. Played in the great city of Chicago, which is where I'm at right now,

which will be future home of the Indiana Bears, apparently. Yeah. Seems really thrilled about that, too. Bring your passport. You pop over one of his game. What are we doing? Geez, get it together. Chicago.

It's supposed to be a great sports city. Get it together. That's right. That was a lot of fun, my man. Always great catching up with Mark Grace. I hope everybody enjoys the Genesis Scottish Open. I'm about to go across the pond. Hope to see you Monday.

Go USA. That's right. America. Yeah. All right. That's going to do it for us. We'll talk to you on next week's Subpar.