Subpar - Recapping WM Phoenix Open week and Nate Bargatze joins us live in-studio

Episode Date: February 13, 2023

On this week's episode of GOLF's Subpar, Nate Bargatze joins former PGA Tour pro Colt Knost and jicky jack legend Drew Stoltz for an exclusive, in-studio, interview. The stand-up star talks golf's influence on his latest Amazon Prime special, his experience at Pebble Beach with Webb Simpson and his favorite Boo Weekly stories. -- Step up to the tee and take a swing at betting the PGA TOUR with the Official Sportsbook of Subpar, FanDuel. Go FanDuel.com/SUBPAR to get a NO SWEAT FIRST BET up to ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS in BONUS BETS! FanDuel, ​​Official Betting Operator of the PGA TOUR. Disclaimer: 21+ in select states. First online real money wager only. $10 Deposit req. Refund issued as non-withdrawable bonus bets that expire in 14 days. Restrictions apply. See full terms at fanduel.com/sportsbook. Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit FanDuel.com/RG (CO, IA, MI, NJ, OH, PA, IL, TN, VA), 1-800-NEXT-STEP or text NEXTSTEP to 53342 (AZ), 1-888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org/chat (CT), 1-800-9-WITH-IT (IN), 1-800-522-4700 or visit ksgamblinghelp.com (KS), 1-877-770-STOP (LA), visit www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD), 1-877-8-HOPENY or text HOPENY (467369) (NY), 1-800-522-4700 (WY), or visit www.1800gambler.net (WV).

Hello world. Welcome back to golf the bar. Colt knows truth. I mean, let's just get the cat out of the bag. We're not well, please. No, this is the flu game right here. Playing hurt, the voices probably reflect that. I'm not going to dwell on it too much, but we had a time.

Phoenix Open came. It arrived. And now, thank God, it's gone for another year. Because I can't handle it anymore. But by God, what a week it is, buddy. You know what? I'm actually hoping nobody watches this on YouTube because I feel like my eyes look like I just got in a fight with Mike Tyson.

You don't look great. You're a little... We're a bit wet. We're here. We made it. I think we left it all on the field. Things went great. Scotty Sheffler, back-to-back champion.

We had our set again on 16, as we do, myself and Amanda. And listen, I gave it all I got. I got nothing left in the tank. and apparently Tiger Woods is playing golf this week. Tigers playing at Rive. Oh, God. That's a big deal. Scotty won.

We're out there until the last putt dropped. And God bless Scotty Shepler for avoiding a playoff. There was 55 guys rooting their asses off for Scotty, like he was part of their family out there yesterday. And he got it done. He's a monster at that place. That thing's turned into a nice little piggy bank for him. but yeah, the week dude, I mean, from the Larry,

which shout out to everybody that came out for that thing, man. That was spectacular. We had a great time out there to concert to the Coliseum, to the birds nest and all the stuff. It's just, it's a special week, man. If you can ever get out there, I'd say it's a bucket list event, cult for golf people. If you've never been to it, there's not, you can't say it enough.

Like, there's just not anything else like it. But it does take its toll. glad we got another year before the next one, but it was sweet. We got a streaker, you know. I don't know how much of that got on the broadcast, but it got a lot of buzz around where we were. I'll tell you this, it didn't get on the broadcast,

but our wonderful producer, Sellershye, made an unbelievable comment. He says, no, he was not a streaker. He was competing in an Iron Man. He ran, he swam, and then there was a cop there with bike. I was like, all he was missing was the bike to complete the Iron Man at the Phoenix Open. That's actually really good.

We started to hear about it right when it happened. I was like, I didn't see this dude, whatever. He gets out on 16 green, does a little pole dance with the flag stick there. Normally on 16, like if you even get on the ground, like it's done. There's so much security down there. He put like this Tyreek Hill fake on the security guard, got through the tunnel, ended up in the lake on 17. I was like, that's got to be the longest streak in the history.

But his mugshot, if you just, have you seen his mugshot on Twitter. I have not seen the mugshot. You haven't seen this dude? Uh-uh. Check him out. soon as we get done with this, you'll look at it. And I could give you a hundred guesses, like pick the one crime that this dude has for this mugshot.

You like streak her. He looks like he's built to streak. But that was a big, that was a deal. And man, no ACEs on 16, but we got one on seven for Big Rick. I was, I was in the group. How about it? How about it? It was loud, you know, our, we do, we do that set.

And obviously last year, we had Sam Ryder, make the whole and one. the place went nuts. So everybody was expecting it this year. Last shot of the day. Best shot of the day. Adam Hadwin hit it to like six inches. Place went nuts. I mean, you can hear it in our voice.

It's just, it's, it's, it's comical, it's tragic, but this is what it does. It's just a lot of screaming, a lot of yelling, a lot of partying. Like you said, I'm glad it's over. Yeah, well said. I feel like, honestly, the more we talk, and before we get to the interview here, the more of a disservice we're doing the listeners, because it is, painful. Highlight,

let's end it with one thing here. Highlight of the week for you. What do you got? Best moment, I guess, of the Phoenix Open. Man, I don't know. Like, there's so many. It was so much fun.

Literally, I have such a blast. Getting to be on 16 all day. I got gymnastics. I said we had a loaded leaderboard and a loaded gallery. Both true. Both true. But just everything, man.

I love the week. It's just unlike anything else, we ever get to do in the game of golf. The people that were out there got to meet Adam Schaefter, the legend. Booker McFarland, who by the way says he was a huge fan of subpar. Talk to him for a while. What a guy.

Yeah. I mean, these people that I have no idea they know who the hell we are and they actually listen to our podcasts. So I met Dave Portnoy. That was pretty awesome. The new owner of the Phoenix Sun. Congratulations to him on his purchase and the trade for Kevin Durant.

um maybe here here in the valley big news there's some part brought to you by the phoenix sun sounds pretty cool i mean maybe we do some live ones at half court or half time you know i mean um i'm with you the whole week's the highlight i thought the final the last night i saw you cold was saturday night that was probably that was probably it for me that was chain smokers night which i'm not i like them uh there's a lot there's a little more singing I feel like at the concerts that I like. There's a lot of noises happening around that thing. And God damn, the group that was out there

and then the post game back there at the Coop with you, that was probably it for me. And that's when I had to really wake up the next morning and reflect on things and say, this is too much. It ends. And I came home and watched the Super Bowl. I probably highlight you.

Eagles didn't win. Eagles didn't win. I pissed off a lot of Philly fans on the broadcast. I've gotten a few threats. Good. People in Philadelphia are not very high. happy with me. I did decide to just go ahead and add on to it last night after they lost. I just said, hi, Philly on Twitter, which went over also very well. But it was an incredible

game. Tip of the cap to both teams. That was incredible. Just to show you how much of an asshole Philly fans are, Jack Prescott got the Walter Payton Man of the Year award in the NFL. They booed him at the Super Bowl last night. I'd say this, I got no dog in this fight. I'm not a Chiefs guy. I'm not an Eagles guy. one of our buddies, Thunderbird guy, he runs most of the clubs, like down in Old Town, Scottsdale, leading into, like, starting on Monday, he's like, dude, the amount of fights and people were having to kick out wearing Eagles shirts, he's like, they just come in and they're just ready to swing on. So he's like, I've never seen anything like we're kicking people out left

and right. These Philly fans are a problem. They're passionate, passionate bunch. I don't got anything against either team because we, you know, or excuse me against Philly because we're not in the same division but I figured that had to be the one for you. I hated how that game ended though, dude. The whole thing called like, all right, slow it down, like frame by frame. But it's like, dude, they were playing pretty physical that game. And that, that was it after that. I was like, you know, Philly tried to let them score. And they said, no, we'll just, you know, slide, run it. And then I thought that for what was a great game, that would be a tough one if you're on the Eagle side. Yeah, man, what, it was awesome. I mean, it was action packed the whole way.

Congrats for the Chiefs, Patrick Mahomes, Travis Kelsey. By the way, our fellow birdie juice chug bud guy, Travis Kelsey. Yeah, shout out. I bet he had a few of them last night, but what a time it was. Congrats to the Chiefs and Alcum Super Bowl lived up to the hype. But how about our guest this week? You're a big man. Stand-up comedy.

You're one of the biggest fans I've ever known. Nate Bargazzi in the house, live and in person. I mean, how good is this guy? It was awesome, man. I had never met him. He came in, whatever day we recorded that. I can't remember. Came in.

The next day, he was out at the Phoenix Open and kind of needed some help with some things and, like, getting around and stuff. And he was like right. I was right there. So I kind of like helped him around, got to talk to him, hang out with him for a while. Not a nicer, more genuine guy that's turned into, like, I mean, he's a star now in the comedy world. And he couldn't be a better dude.

And, man, it was fun, sit down and talking with him. I always like getting outside the golf box, you know, occasionally. And this was a treat. All right. Well, let's get to it. He's got his new special on Amazon Prime called Hello World, which we do every day here on golf sub-bar. Nate Bargazzi.

Here he is. All right, what a treat we have in store here today. We got one of the most popular comics in all of stand-up right now. His fifth comedy special, Hello World, is out now on Prime Video. Fresh off planet, Pebble Beach, now in the Valley of the Sun. Nate Bargetzi, good to have you. you dude. Good to have you. I mean, good to have me. Yeah. Yeah. Whatever. I like having you guys. Thanks for coming to this podcast. Yeah, absolutely. We're dialed. I don't know the name of it, but thanks for being here.

Yeah. Yeah. It's just something I dreamed up a long time ago doing a golf podcast and have two guests like yourself. Look at your career now. I could have never envisioned golf support would one day. Yeah. Big moment. Yeah. No, I'm excited to be here. I'm a big fan. So, I appreciate it. I appreciate you. I know you had an amazing time at Pebble last week. Your first AT&T Pebble Beach problem, but you got to be a little excited to be here in Phoenix, get out of that cold weather up there. It was crazy. You know, I've only played pebble one other time, and we got lucky, and it was like great. And so, and then the practice rounds were like, it was pretty nice. Perfect. And so you're like, all right, this baby won't be bad. And then it got, yeah, it got real. We played Thursday. It was that first day. We're on NPC, and we started on the back, and then we're in the front by the water.

And they had a water their greens, try to keep the ball on it. And it was just like, you know, You can play, be like, I don't know hitting the win. Like there's not a, I don't have it like keep it below the wind shot. But you're like a five handicap. I mean, you got a game. I'm a seven, six point three to be, but it's trending. I play, yeah, I actually play really good Thursday Friday. Spyglass was not so much, but I beat Larry Fitzgerald.

You got to play, you were paired with Ian Strelman. Or at a good group and you clipped him. I heard I'm talking, I saw a little Twitter thing going around where I think you hooked one or something. He's like, oh, we got a chance today or something like that that went out. But you end up getting his ass. I mean, it's a lot of ass, too. It is. There's a big one.

There's a lot to have, man. Yeah. He, uh, a wonderful person. I mean, just a delight. My dad and uncle were falling around and like he was talking to them all week. And like, he's just, uh, was such a great guy. All of them were Strillman, Webb Simpson. I've known who I played with.

Uh, so the whole group was great. But yeah, but Larry, I got to show him what's. Who's the meanest guy in that group? Because, like you said, Webb Simpson, Hugh, Kevin Streelman, Larry Fitzgerald. Those four of the nicest people have ever met. Streeles. Strills. Strills is probably the means.

Gotta be just by default. Yeah, it could be Strills. He told me, I hit on eight at a pebble. It was in the win. I hit unreal. First shot just in the fairway, hit an unbelievable six iron that stuck at like eight feet above the hole. And then three putted. And then, and Strillman told me everything, he goes, two of the best golf shots.

ever seen on this hole in three of the worst putts. Because you're like, feel like you're in the, like Stroman would read a lot. And they all would help you with the putts. And Strillman read a lot of them. And he told me that one. And then, but I mean, you know, there was a couple that I thought I hit it good. I actually did something because I, did you, were you talking about when we were playing at Pebble?

Were you on? I don't know who was on. But I raised my putter up when I putt. Like I tend to lift the handle up and I fix that at Spide Glass. Wasn't me. Yeah. How'd you get to know, so you and Webb, you said you knew Webb before, how that relationship started? He came to a show in Charlotte.

And so then we just messaged and, you know, and then just, I played with him in Quail Hollow last time I was in Charlotte, like in December. And then he was telling him I was made out here and he was like, you have a partner. And he hasn't been out here in a while. And he's like, well, if I play, I'll, you know, ask for you. And then a couple weeks before, he said he was going to play. and so what a great partner to have. Yeah, tell us, like,

what were the nerves like for you teeing it up the first day in this compared to like, I mean, obviously, you go out and you perform in front of thousands and thousands of people. Yeah, it's a different thing. It was the,

the pebble one was the most nervous because, you know, MPCC, I mean, there's people around and Spyglass, it's, there's people around, but it's not as much.

The Pebble Day was like, there was a lot more people around. So some of it was the, it wasn't always the, it wasn't always the drives because I you know what for playing in this tournament people always say you get people everywhere they do a really good job of like if you're looking down a fair way you don't see everybody like there it's but uh I remember on uh was it 16 I think when you're teeing off they're right there

so like even though you can't see them because your hat you just know I mean you can feel it that there's just 30 people like right there so but you could block it out some the putting was the you know because it's disappointing when you got a put and you just hear the crowd go and you're like I don't I don't know how to do this so like if you want them to drop you know or if you had like I had a real birdie on 15 I think and so it was like you you want those to really go and like you hit two really because it's been you hit two really good shots and then you just and then you miss a dumb put. And I miss some that are just,

some of you're just trying to not be in their line because you've got to worry about that through line. Yeah, that can be tricky for, I don't like the through line. Why are you thinking about missing it? Yeah. And you're not the first dude who's up there all day either. And why are you putting it so far past it?

Yeah, you know? Never understood the through line. Yeah. Yeah. And we just get, I just put both feet just on top of the hole. And I grab, and I got to squat down and grab my ball.

So we played in the same. group is Chris Berman one year and that's how actually he picked up his ball but he's a rather big human he picks it up weird he steps pretty much on the hole and then he like spins out to go away and it would just leave these massive marks so then your through line was a problem so after about two holes we're like Chris we'll get your ball out of the hole for you the rest of the day maybe that's what he wanted the whole time someone to get it's almost like a perfect way to do it just to go like yeah we got to do you know he should have brought it like very provocatively like his legs really don't the knees don't bend you know I mean it's kind of like you know like you're going to slip a one in the back

that's what he's doing. This is only your first year at Pebble. I love talking to all the celebs when they get back, because you are out of your element out there. You're a performer. You're not a golfer necessarily. Did you have any weird ones? Like you're talking about 16 with the people right there.

There's opportunities to, you know, hit some people or do something weird that you feel bad about. Do you have any of that? I did not hit anybody. I had on MPCC at one hole. I was not inside the ropes. I basically had to wear my credentials to go hit my ball the whole time

because it was, I mean, I was just down. It was a long part five. The wind was nuts on the front. And the wind was getting so crazy. It was one where the putt, like Webb, I think the putt broke right to left, and he had to putt it the other way because of the wind or something.

And when he putt it, he made it, made a birdie. And he came over and said, he goes, that's the best putt I've ever made in my life. Just because you had to read the wind so much. So that one I, like, topped. I can still top a driver. And then that one I topped and just rode the whole. there was I was out of it I hit three times before they hit and so that and then you're just with people you're just walking with like and you know it's like you got this giant group you just like it's like

a couple of guys with you and they're just one guy had this big long beard and he seemed like he's been getting after it for the day a guy that you wouldn't expect to be a golf fan like he just didn't look like you know and he was like kind of talking to me and I got to just walk I'm like friends with them now because I got to walk with him because I just kept hitting it just never back in the ropes and then I just finally got across so that was the only one that was you're kind of outside but no injuries and no no I didn't that's a success uh Argent at wall uh in a practice round he played one hole with us and I scolded a chip into his leg nice there we go and he gotta draw blood he wasn't he was playing alone until he didn't I think he just was like kind of minding his own business and then

And it's like we got there. Wesley Bryant played with us. It was awesome. And then he was like, all right, I'll do one with you. And then, and I hit him. Never again. Yeah. And he's like, that's just why.

He was very nice about it. But he knew, in his mind, he had to be like, this is why. I can't even just wait one moment. He's like, all right, let's all play together. And then I just yank one right into his ankle. Beautiful. Was there any people, obviously, tons of celebrities out there? Was there anybody that you were, like, excited to meet

you got a chance to meet it all? Yeah, I mean, trying to think, like, meet them all. I mean, I met Josh Dumal, Dummel or DeMal. That was pretty cool to see him. Bateman and Will Arnett, obviously, like, I've never met them. And so they were super cool. Just seeing everybody's kind of cool and, like, how you can kind of go up to people.

My uncle was on the million-dollar hole challenge, so my uncle smoked cigars. and he was the only one with the lighter. So he was a hit. And it was his, I mean, heaven. He just, and everybody knew he was the only one with the lighter, and everybody was smoking a cigar, so they knew they had to go to him.

And so he would be like, well, you got to take a picture with me. So, I mean, he's got pictures with like Josh Allen, Aaron. Like, everybody that smoked a cigar had to go through him to get it. It's a good play. Monopoly on the lighter. That's a good play at the celebrity deal. I like your gar, but quick selfie. You want one.

You got to take it. You're a huge golf guy. Obviously, like when you're on the road and you're performing, are you bringing your clubs with you? Are you like, is it that level? Can you do that? Yeah, yeah, I got a bus. So you just have them on the bus. And it gets hard to play sometimes because it's such a big commitment.

You know, it's four hours. So I'll go play. Like, I played with Webb at Quill. Like, you know, you kind of have to keep it to some unique situations. Really like, well, I definitely want to go try to play this. It's tiring. And if you play too late, like I don't get up early. So it's, I'm not going to play super early.

and then if you play like later in the day you hit around 14 holes and you kind of are thinking about the show and your mind you kind of just stop caring so nine holes would probably be the best if I did that or go like chip and practice someone said that they're like they do a lot chipping and practicing that's nice you could do it though on the road even if it's nine like it helps you just stay sharp just to go do something and like hit some so I've gotten a lot busier so it's been harder but I do try to I do try to go if I can go play. I've pulled up.

I mean, I played with Jason Day at Mearfield, and so we had the bus to just drive, like we'd just drive to the Mirfield and just dropped me off. And that guy, because my bus driver didn't remember, he didn't know golfers. So when he got there, we were still asleep. And we said, just tell him we're playing with Jason Day,

like they know we're coming. And then he's like, we're here to play with John Daly. And I mean, they were. I mean, that woke up, the course. The course was like, Like, they got to be prepared for a different day. Like, they're just like, oh, we didn't know John Daly was coming. She just got excited.

Yeah. They got more milkshakes. We got to load up the bar. Yeah. We're not ready for this. We're not, yeah, we weren't prepared for John Daly. Oh, that is. And your new special, hello world.

I mean, that's a nod to the goat, right? Yeah. Did you know that all? Like, how'd that come about? I, so every special has been like, like, like, not a, far as like the Netflix and the now Amazon. It was like the Tennessee kid, the greatest after American. It's like kind of like, it's not really based on a joke in it,

but it's just trying to set the tone of what the special is or you get a vibe of what it's going to be. And with this one, I wanted it to be, I was thinking of trying to find something to be a nice kind of greeting, a welcoming greeting. Like, you know, my special was like, I want it to be fun. I wanted people to just like, it be entertainment and that's all it is. and so I kind of thought of that name and obviously I know what Tiger said that and so it was definitely it was kind of a perfect world

where it was like all right well I want a name of this and I love that it is and I have a golf joke in it and not about Tiger but it can be a nod to him and I got to meet him because I did a show for the like some private show for the PGA

like some something and him and Rory talked in it So I got to tell him And that was when I like I told Amazon I was like we're calling it hello world like Cause I mean I just told him that I named it after him And you know and he was he was cool with it

As much as he could be Yeah what did he say? Did he like was he excited or was like yeah I don't mean it's a lot like people don't like Comedians are if you're in a band like it's like Comedies people know comedy But it's it's just when you walk up I don't think you meet a lot of comedians

So when you walk up and I'm like, I'm a comedian and I'm nervous. And within two seconds, I'm like, I'm naming my special after you. Like, it's like, it's a lot for him to take it. You know, it's a lot. He's like, that's cool, man. Like, you know, good luck at your local high school. We're standing there the other day. It's Scott Eastwood, Michael Pena and Alfonso Ribeiro.

And you start stuck and he's like, you're like, I'm a comedian, by the way. I'm like, Nate, we all know who you are. Like, what's going on? Yeah, you know what's going on. I don't know what tiger. I don't know. on you walk in any room i walk into i'm like i'm a comedian yeah you just kind of set you don't know why because they're like why are you here like what are you doing uh yeah you you say it a lot

and you're used to like gigs dude when you first start you show up to these places and they don't know why you're there you're be you're performing at some bar or some restaurant and someone booked you for it and you're in the back of the bar and you got they're like who are you and you're like i'm the comedian they're like what and then you got to go walk and do the show so you're just used to saying it. I want to know about like kind of how you got into it because it's not like when you're six, you're like, I'm going to, I want to be a comedian when I grew up. Or maybe it is. I don't know. But talk about your how you got into it and your rise to where you are now, which, you know, I talked to Bill Ingval, who's a legend in the comedy world, told me you are his

favorite comedian. Well, he's very nice. And he, you know, it's, my dad's a magician. Yeah. So, and he does comedy with his magic. So I do have, there's a comedy background in there. And I would do stuff with him. I think I always kind of wanted to be a comedian, but it was, I don't know if I knew like how to, like, you don't know to be like, all right, I'm going to do it. How do you do it? You know, even though he was doing shows, I know he practiced, but it's like magic and comedy. It's essentially kind of the same kind of avenue. But I didn't know what to do and how to start. So I was, like in high school, I was kind of started wanting to do it a lot more and then dream about it. Then I tried college a little bit.

bit, college didn't really work out. So I just, then eventually just was like doing it. I was doing a job. I read water meters. So I was like just doing a job like working for the county, Wilson County, like just whatever job you have, you know. And I had a buddy that wanted to go do improv at Second City. And then so when I knew that, I was like, and that's in Chicago.

And I was like, all right, well, I'll just move to Chicago. You know, I'll just go with you to Chicago. Like I had a job that I was like, I can. I've always come back to this. I didn't have some career. You know, some people, some comics give up careers. Like, you know, a lot of comics can be lawyers or all these kind of big things. I didn't have it.

You know, I was, I could walk. That guy that I did it with is back working there now. So, I mean, the door's still open to me. The 37138. 371.38. Yeah. We can head back. Yeah, you can.

That's the zip code where it's from. Yeah. And you'll never forget it. He says it in a special. 37 plus one is 38. Yeah, that's a good way. Yeah, that's a learn to remember. And I can figure that out.

Yeah. So what was the, I mean, being kind of like you said, like, how do I do it? It's kind of like pro golf. Like, one day you can just be like, I'm pro. And I can go sign up for a mini tour event and play for some money and you've got to work your way up. When you're a comic, like, I guess you just say, I'm a comic. How do you start booking gigs?

Like, what was your first gig? Like paid gig, you remember doing like, okay, I'm a comic now? The first is like, I won a contest once. I think I won like 200 bucks. But the first one I got was. like a college gig and they would just like I did CMT comedy stages for Gary Mule Deal Deer was on it who's always at Pebble and uh beauty and they thought I was like I was young so I mean I was probably like 26 or something uh they thought I worked for CMT because I was on

with all these kind of older guys so they just thought I worked there or something but I was on that show and from that I got I did Belmont Belmont University reached out to me on my space this is how long goal it was and it was like we want to book you for this thing so then you're doing it yourself so then they're asking like how much you charge and you're like I mean you have no concept of what you would charge I mean you're trying not to go I'll do it for free because you know so I forget what it was I think I said a thousand dollar like which is for a college and they they said yes they always say yes very quickly and you're like I should have two I could have two thousand you know 100,000 I have one TV credit in my hundred grand.

But so I did that. And I didn't really have the material. You know, to gain the material, it takes a lot of time. And I'm going to come to like four years at that point. So I knew I could only do probably 30, 40 minutes. And so then I had my dad come out. And I was like, I needed him to do the show too and like do like basically half the time. So then it's, I could give them a full hour.

But then I had to, with him when he came and did it, I was like, but you can't. Like he's very funny. And my dad's very, very good at what. he does and so he destroys when he goes out so i was kind of like but don't you know i was like don't be too good like i got to go up after you uh but i mean he just destroyed and then uh and then he brought me up and so there's a very emotional moment so then he starts crying because he's bringing me up and i mean this is all and i'm just back there like i got to follow all of this and i'm just not good like at this point or i'm fine you know whatever not ideal so yeah not ideal to be like i wish you would not

be crying. Just bomb. Yeah, just bomb in 20 minutes. Yeah. And so then I went up and it was like fine. Like it was, you know, you get through it. But that was the first kind of gig where you did. But then it goes back to zero for a while. Like you make that thousand and then it's just nothing. Do you have to chop a thousand with your dad since he did a part of it? No. I think even gave me extra money because I didn't, I mean, we have no money at that time. So what a guy. But you go back from you make no money. I'm sure you all have the same thing.

you go making zero money to then you can make like 20 grand a year and you like you made it in comedy and then i remember uh when i made like 25 or 30 grand a year i was like all right i worked at applebee's like that's what i was making an applebee so i was like at least i'm making what what my educational level of job would allow me to have like i'm at least at that mark so then you're just kind of feel like all right i was able to somehow and yeah it's and you don't even know how you got this money. You're like, I don't know how, but somehow I've made this money. And so you just kind of slowly like find ways. And then I did, I remember I did a cruise ship. And I had like a couple late night appearances. So you have to be clean on a cruise ship. And I was, I'm clean. So I was like,

all right, worst case, I've done a cruise ship. I can do cruise ship. Like you're just looking for like the bottom. Yeah, this is the worst. This is the worst case scenario. I at least have a safety net of like, I'll just do cruise ships and, you know, and be able to do comedy forever. And then you're, you know, hopefully your net just kind of gets higher. Just go to Catalina a hundred times a year. Pretty good gig. You fly to Bahamas, get on the boat. You ride back with those people to Miami.

They get off the boat, and then a new group gets on, and then you fly back to Hamas, and then you fly to Bahamas. What was the first big show? You got the call to come to a really big show. Conan was the first late night I got. And that was one, I just talked about it on Tonight Show recently, but that was when we get there. They pick you up in a car. They tell you it's going to be a limo and it's just a town car.

Like when you're from not New York, like you don't, like, they just, New York does the word limo around pretty loosely. Yeah. And so you say, I'm like expecting a real limo and it's just a regular town car, which is still very nice. But in my mind, I think it's a stretch limo. So you're kind of like, all right, let's already not off to a great start. but you get in the car

and I remember I drove up to 30 Rock and as I'm getting out there's all these like paparazzi or like people wanting autographs taking pictures and so then they start walking to the car and I'm just like I just know I was like this is not they think this is somebody. Yeah this is Leo yeah they think it's like a big deal

and they all walk over to me and I opened the door and then they were like it's nobody they yelled it's nobody and no one took a picture one guy is digital cameras too they could just delete they could take the pictures and immediately delete them and just save my feelings from being hurt and i remember one guy took a picture he didn't put it up to his eye he just took it from his chest and he just goes snaps and he's like he just did just the case he's like maybe this guy kills a guy or something that's a good confidence boost

going to your biggest it's nobody like you didn't have to say that out loud i could just walk away oh we thought it was tom cruise but it's not he's She's coming later. I had it just when I did the tonight show, they had, these girls were on, Jeannie and, I'm blank on their name now. They have a show on Netflix. And, but there was a bunch of people waiting out for them.

And this girl comes and I'm going to have to roll over the window down. Just let her know I'm not them. There's a lot of that. You got to roll the window and go, I'm sorry. Yeah, just apologizing for being you. And then the window goes right up. I know, I'll take one. Like, nah, I don't want to walk over.

Don't waste the story. Yeah, on the iPhone. I had to tell her twice because leaving in and out of 30 Rock the reason that. As we drove down, I had to tell her, it's not me. And then as we drove up, she was still out there. And I had to roll it out. And they get so excited as the windows coming down because they're like, I'm about to meet my person. And then it's just my dumb face.

It's like missing a butt at Pebble. Yeah. There they go. No one saw it, right? Talk to me a little bit. I'm curious about like your process. Because listen to yourself. It's a lot of situational stuff, a lot of marriage stuff, which, I mean, some of the stuff you say, I'm like, yes, that's exactly.

But like, when you're in the moment, some little argument with your wife or whatever, are you knowing at the time, like, this is going to be a bit? This is it. Or when does that hit you? Like, that's, I got 10 minutes on that. That's funny. Yeah, in the moment. So, like, the joke and the greatest average America, the one fell swoop joke that people bring up a lot. Yeah.

That one was, I was actually going golfing. I was at Legends, Vanderbilt Legends, where I play a lot. And they were, I remember I was pulling in there when that happened. So as you're saying, we're in this moment of this fight. There is something in your head that's like kind of backlogging it, like you're kind of remembering it. And then I remember I got home. And then I will think, like, I think this could be something.

And so then I just kind of think about it. I just kind of, you know, you just kind of let what happens happens. It's not like I'm trying to make it something. Yeah. But it's like I know. You're just kind of a, like a spidey sense kind of just knows, like, I think this can be something. I was going to ask you, are you ever in one of those? And you're like, this is going to be funny.

I'm just going to egg this on a little bit more. See what I can get her to say. And I just dump a little fuel on the fire because this could really be good if I keep going with it. Yeah, I mean, if you, if I had something. But I can stop, but you can also, it's sometimes the fight can be like that fight. I'll go quickly into like, I think that'll be funny. And I'll just say that. And so she gets upset sometimes with, because I'm.

too, it's too quick of like I've already moved on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You should be feeling bad about this, but you're like, no, that's a bit. Yeah. And then I like to tell her, like, you know, I'm like, we made money because of that fight. It's true. So then it's like.

Has she ever got mad at you for sharing one on stage? No. I, you know, I don't have it in me to like, I don't want someone to feel bad. I don't want. And when I tell these jokes, when you first start telling jokes, when I first start telling jokes about my wife, people, it would come off like I, didn't want to be married. And that wasn't the point.

So like even like, and I've learned this writing like scripts. Like if you write, you have to show love. Like there has to be, the people have to believe that you, or show that you love this person. Are they not going to laugh because it feels mean? And then they're like, well, it doesn't feel like a good marriage or a good family or whatever it is. So you have to learn at the beginning, it would just be like, you know, if I'm just

peppering her a lot and I don't do anything on me, It can be too much where it's like, okay. Like, you can go, you can, you usually can feel where you kind of cross the line where you're like, I need to like. Women will turn against you in the audience too. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, dude, you're just like, I ain't right, dude.

You're like, you know, dudes will love you. Someone's calling Slice. Is that me? Well, no one else has a computer here. You know, it's probably Amazon. Yeah. The one you said in your, in your latest special, Hello World, though, about when she goes to bed

and then she comes back out while you're out sitting there watching TV, I just thought was amazing. Because we've all been there. Yeah. It's very fun to tell those jokes with, because when you first say them, you are wondering, like, are people going to, do they relate to it? Or, you know, you don't know where the laugh's going to come from.

Is it going to come because you relate to it or you're just laughing at the situation that I'm in? But you can tell the laughs, like, their laughs are different. They're like, you can feel like the laughs are deep, like where you're like, they're like, Like, yeah, dude. Been there. You know. And sometimes I've had even, you can tell a joke or a fight. I've told a fight.

And you can tell someone's had that fight maybe on the way to the show. And those are great too. Because then, I mean, those are the ones that like resonate the most with people just because they're like, dude. And they try to resonate. They resonate with both sides. It's not. And that's one where if I talk about my wife not going to bed, if I just end it there, it's like, I'm just mad at her.

But then I talk about her not wanting me to eat in front of her. And I give a list of things that she doesn't want me to do. Because it's like you're trying to show the balance to be. Because this is all one-sided. I'm just the one talking about this stuff. I love that when you came back and like, it was talking about an argument you won. And we go to bed. She'd give me a kiss on the head, right?

Like that's her way of saying sorry, even though she didn't actually say sorry, which that also like hit home. I was like, yes. I actually won one. I don't want it to be over. I want to like wake her up and like, hey, you know? Like prove my point again. And I was like, yeah, that's, you're speaking to me.

Yeah, all your stuff is just, I mean, it's for the everyday guy, which is great. Like, I'm a big coffee drinker. And your Starbucks bit is fantastic. Yeah, thank you. He's not a big, he's not a big coffee guy. So he doesn't understand how intimidating Starbucks is. And like, for me, like my ex-girlfriend, she was big into skinny vanilla lattes. And I tried it once.

And I was like, God damn, that's really good. Yeah, yeah. But I don't want to go up to the owner. I'm like, hey, man, can I get a skinny vanilla latte? Like, I feel terrible about it. What did my wife say? Can I get a vanilla latte, maybe sugar-free with a non-fat milk that be right. Not for me.

Yeah. We have a name for that. Yeah. No. And then they announce it. Skinny and a lot of day for cold. I'm like, damn it. Yeah. Clot. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They spell it wrong on purpose every Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that was a, like, it's those moments that like, sometimes when you tell that joke when you first tell it, I say it is like, I'll think of it as just a funny situation. But then it's like you can tell afterwards when it, again, like, people are like, yeah, yeah, I know exactly what you're talking about. And really,

and if you don't go to Starbucks, you get it. Like you get no idea. Like this special, I have a golf joke. And so telling that golf story is, you know, it's like, all right, I don't know if everybody's going to know every golf. Like, you know, some people might not really know what a driver is. Like they don't, if they have no world around on that golf, so they wouldn't know. But you're trying to set it in a way that you're like, you don't really have to golf. It's more about just me and my wife being in this situation.

The situation just happened to be on this golf course. So, like, your new special just came out. You're going to have another one going forward. Let's say you got an hour. Your next special is going to be an hour. How long does it take you to get that material? I'm not doing it right now. It takes a while.

But it's, I mean, you got to do it quicker now because people are, it's, you know, this is all new kind of an area for me and that people are really coming out to shows. And specifically even now, like, I have people travel to multiple shows. I met, there's a caddy, I met at Pebble. He said they've been to 20 shows. And so people come to a lot of shows and it's very, it's unreal and it's very nice. And then so right now I'm building. Hopefully, I think I got some stuff.

I was trying to do some stuff for my parents. And so my dad was with us all weekend. So that helped. Like I kind of thought of some stuff. And just not being on stage helps. Like you got to get, because when you're touring a lot, it's like hard because I'm like, you're like, I've got to have new stuff. The special's out now.

So like, you know, these people are, you know, it's supposed to be all new material. And so you kind of feel the pressure of like, you got to put it out. But it takes, you know, roughly, it's about every two years you tape. And then, and it comes out about every two years. That's what's so hard about, like,

stand-up comments. Like, if you're a musician, you make a great album. They want you to play that album for the next 40 years. Jimmy Buffett's still playing the same song wrote from 30 you know and they don't want to hear anything new comics it's like incredible special doing now write another one i get very upset with musicians it's i mean you're like just one one one smash right one smash yet and then they just get it right they just get to do that forever

and then everybody's happy and uh there's a lot of jealousy in that that you're just like once you do it you got to turn up because you know connie's all about a surprise i luckily have some jokes that There are stories, they're long stories that some people want to hear. So sometimes, like, if you're having, like, as I'm building this new hour, it's like, I could, like, you know, you kind of, I do as much new as I can do, whether it be an hour, 45 minutes an hour, and then you can kind of close with some, like, greatest hits or whatever. But overall, you've got to be turned over pretty quick. And I wish this time I would have taken more time off after this special.

It all just kind of blew up, and it's gotten all kind of crazy. Like, I was telling, like, we're supposed to go. like with Larry a lot of these athletes or whatever and uh so they always want to golf and you're like y'all are retired like this is 43 is like a comedian's peak like our our prime is 40 like you're just entering your 40s are just you know it takes I always the same comedy is like you either make it at 20 or 40 like no one really makes it in the middle so you either get lucky and you're pt davidson who I was with when he first started him 16 and doing the clubs and uh you get it blow up super fast are your, you know, Burr and these other routes

where you end up being 40 before everybody really sees you and finds out who you are. So, yeah, right now is like the busiest I've been. You've got to live a bit. Who are some of your favorites to listen to? Burr's one. Burr was a big one for me because it was, when I first moved to New York, I would see him.

He was at that stage where he was, like, he had an HBO one-night stand taping that was big, and he had a big open Anthony in Philadelphia, a big thing where he attacked the, he just trashed. The countdown was on and he's like, I got however long he just smashed him. You would love that. It's all unbelievable.

Yeah, it's great. If you, it was, uh, he goes on, I mean, the crowds being super out of, they're booing everybody and, and Berg goes up and YouTube was just kind of, uh, you know, where stuff would go viral and it went viral and, uh, he was something that I watched because he did that. And then he had that.

HBO one night stand, all this stuff kind of combined. So, like, we'd go see him at Carolines on Broadway in New York. And we'd go watch him, and there'd be really no one in the crowd. And then, like, after that next year, it was like, the club wouldn't even want you to come in because they were too crowded. And when he first went up, people would shout out, like, cities they're from, because they wanted him to trash their cities because it was like, oh, this dude's great at this thing.

And he would be, and he would just put a stop to it and say, I'm not, I'm not, that's not, you know, because you could get stuck where that's your career. That's your stay. If you stay doing that, like, so that was like a big thing for me to learn watching him was to, is to keep writing material. So you don't have to just sit and be this one kind of thing. Because, you know, it's, you know, that could get tiring if you have to have this persona, you know, the whole time. Yeah.

Bill Burr is one of my personal favorites. I love him. Yours, fantastic. Your styles are so different, right? Because you're super clean. He goes off. He talks to hot topics and cusses and stuff. How hard is it this day and age to be a clean comic and have the success you're having?

Because really, I mean, you look at them, Burr, Chappelle, you know, Jervais, whoever, go down the list. Like, they all are that other side. And then you're one of the few that can do it being clean, which I think is way harder. Yeah, I agree. It's way harder. It's impossible. You know, I'm playing a plus at comedy. Yeah.

Now, it's, yeah, it's hard. It's, you know, it's the way I started. So I don't think of it as any, any, it's the way I write, the way I come up. stuff it's what I do and I but to be honest you right now I mean I always say with young comics like competitively even it's I'm in my own lane as far as being clean and being like we have all

ages come to the show I'm not trying to make comedy for kids but your kids can listen to this and I have a 10 year old daughter and so you know I know what it's like to watch stuff uncomfortably with your parents and that's how I grew up and so it's I'm in my own kind of lane right now and like so that's kind of like,

there's a lot of comics that are clean that are, I mean, obviously Brian Regan, Gaffigan, his comic, Ryan Hamilton's very funny. Like,

there's a lot of comics that are clean, but there's not that many. And so you're just kind of by yourself. And I say that with comics. I mean, you just need to be yourself. So this is just kind of who I am.

But it's, you know, giving your opinion and stuff like that, that's probably the harder part because you can sometimes see, like, comics give their opinion, or they're hot take

or their whatever. and it gets like, you know, a lot of likes on Instagram or a lot of like people start talking about. They're like, I love that he said. And, you know, Chappelle with all the stuff that he did. And you see that and you're like, well, am I supposed to be doing something more than just being funny? So sometimes it's hard to remind yourself to kind of go back.

You know, you think, well, maybe I should be talking about the topics that are going on. But it's like, that's not really my purpose. And like, I also look at it as like entertainment to be like, I'm entertainment. and it's the job of what I'm doing is supposed to be just you're supposed to come watch and have fun and I'm not trying to like you know I didn't go to college I didn't do all these things like what do you care no one cares about what I think or whatever so right now you feel very much that it's like just kind of stay just do my thing and like I remember I saw a clip it went around on Instagram something with Elvis like they asked him about the war like dodging the draft

you know and he was like ah he goes i'm just doing music and then they were like what about other people that are dodging he's like even if i answered that that would yeah reveal an opinion and he's like i'm just an entertainer athletes get that all the time yeah and it's like just be it's like just be like you know it's all entertainment it's all just like you're supposed to be a break and uh you're supposed to be something that people can people are aware what's going on people are smart they know how to the audience is not dumb that's another like you got to the people that are watching they're not dumb like I don't know who you know they it's a lot of people can be talked down to and uh this audiences like when I go you want the you you want to love your audience the audience that comes

out I would I think they're me like I mean why you know like who I'm no like who am I'm nobody dude like I just grew up no hickory like I'm not anybody better than anybody else and so you think they're them so you're just like and they are pretty smarter than me like almost like guaranteed the unreal chances their percentages through the roof of just the odds and they all probably went to school and stuff like they all did stuff uh so it's it's just go out and be fun and entertaining and uh you know and just you you got to remind yourself to do that a lot because you can you there an ego can come up I mean you go up there's a lot of you go people are clapping you get off stage you get standing ovation you're like you think like maybe I am important you know I'm special you're

You know, and then you've got to be reminded that, you know, you're not. Your style is also like a nice recess because everywhere, you're trying to TV, anything, whether it's comedy or news or what it's just the same shit, right? It's like politics or all the hot topic, you know what I mean? It's like, this is a nice break from that. We all know what's going on. We don't need it. We don't need to be bombarded when we're trying to get away from it.

Just like turn on Netflix or Amazon and watch something funny for a while. Yeah, just be easy to watch. I mean, that's why you look at like the office and Seinfeld. and everybody those shows are still the top shows and it's because they can be rewatched and you're just like I can just you know I go back to watch I watch a lot of old movies whether it's I'll go through big Seinfeld I'm a giant Seinfeld fan so I'll go through

Seinfeld phases and then I'll go uh then I'll watch like equalizer with Denzel watch or taken or like just these kind of fun like you know just whatever it is like I already kind of know the movie and you're just kind of It's like comfort watching. Taking really fun. Taking super fun. It's a nice little light watch. Dude, I watch Taking 2.

I've gone through Taken 2 again. And it's very fun to watch like how, because it's like, it's crazy. He's got to do the same thing. A, he's just in these situations that are so fun that it's like, how does he get back into the situation? And then they take someone else and taking 2, not to ruin it. They take his wife.

Yeah, that's spoiler. They take him, he and his wife. He's got terrible luck. I mean, just brutal, brutal luck just to go. I mean, about it, maybe don't travel out of the country. You know, that's a big, that's a big thing. If you're, don't go to Istanbul. Fool me once type of deal.

Yeah, yeah, goes in. He goes, it's happened again. I will be taken. That's like a good kidnapping to just wind down at night, you know what I mean? But it's like a, it's like a fun. Yeah, those are very serious. But it's just a fun, like, it's like just like mindless. And you're like, you're looking for mindless.

Yeah. And that's what I want my comedy. My comedy is mindless. But it's relatable. It's like curb. Yeah. Right? Yeah, I want to remind you that you are also mindless.

And that's what I try to get home to the audience. We are all mindless. I don't even need a reminder most of the time. Our audience knows that. Yeah. They are mindless because they listen to us every week. All right, we got to get to the E9. You're a busy man, so we've got to get you out of here.

Nine fun questions about you. We ask us to everyone. You can trade lives with anyone. Be them for a day. who would it be uh tiger i go to the top i like uh i think golf is thanksgiving or like 2000 yeah which day we need like a day i mean to the u.s open he's had some good at just where you're uh he wins about what 15 yeah yeah

are you want that master i don't know that you have something just like because isn't that the one like he went to the uh the story like he went to the range you played vegas something shot 59 or something and then they uh they're 59 on his way yeah they go just put all your money on yeah like that that confidence in that you know just dominance and just filling that crowd and i believe him and adam scott stopped in Vegas to work with butch and they went out and played and even adam said why am i going to this is just a waste of time he's going to win yeah and he won by 15 with a triple boge best golf ever played in the history of golf yeah yeah four days i agree yeah With a trip.

Yeah. Just grease that one out. He had a triple. He had a triple on Saturday on number three. And he also finished with one ball. Yeah. The dog leg left. Oh, yeah.

Also finished with one ball. Maybe I don't want to be Tiger. Sounds a lot like what I do already. Turns out I'll be myself Friday. I think I played a little better than that. All right. You touched on this one. There's one of my favorite bits you do that.

Have you, did you and your wife finally resolve the meaning of one fell swoop? Like it resolved? it never got it got resolved in the fact that I told the joke and she she was saying why was she saying she was doing it she was saying it for a different reason because it was going to her mom and dad's i think she meant maybe the whole like getting the she made the weekend being the one fell and like i take things too literal is what is one of the parts and then so it was it was that and so So yeah, long story, I worked on myself and I don't cause those problems. That's how it all ends up being is I end up, well, I guess I'll fix whatever.

I'll ask too many questions. So I think I ended up having to like, you know, she's rolling. Eat that one. Yeah. I'm proud of you for growing up. She's Tiger. She's Tiger in our relationship. She's Tiger in 2000, the US Open.

I mean, she's just, everything's perfect. And that was her one triple. but she got it back. All right, number three. Tyler Reeve, who's a friend of yours, country music, singer, writer, and all this. His wife's a huge fan of yours. First time you met his wife.

Do you remember what happened? Did she have a boot on her lid? I think there was a man that did. She described him to you. Yes, yes. What did she say? Oh, yeah. Oh, she described, she goes,

yeah, because we were talking about some guy at Older Country Club and they're and she pointed it and she was like she was like kind of she was using every description

except like he had a cast on his leg she's like he had a cast a sombrero and something else and she's like it's the guy over in the blue shorts

you're like that's how you describe that guy yeah yeah yeah I remember her telling me that that would be a moment that you would learn to do a joke like if you could

like you'd catch on to that moment yeah she was like the blue shirt and like the guy had everything yeah he had an arm growing out of his head but she's like yeah

blue shirt yeah everything except the obvious things yeah he's i do remember tyler ree by the way is a beauty he is we had a lot of fun he's good dude um now here's one for me you kind of touched on but like give me the first moment where you thought to yourself like i've made it as a comic um i did it that that did it uh hmm there's i mean that's like weird it's like there's so many uh there's a bunch of moments it's like they all go you know we're I'm about to do Bridgestone Arena. And, you know, you don't ever really, not to try to say, I know what you mean.

You don't always ever feel like you may. Like, you always feel like this can all, you don't, because you go do shows and you're like, I don't know why they're here. Like, you know, and you're nervous that they're going to just be like, this guy stinks, dude. Bridgett, but, I don't know. I'm trying to think exactly.

Is it right now? Yeah. I mean, it's kind of all. It kind of all. It all kind of changes. I mean, because you don't ever, even like saying when I go up and say I'm a comedian, it's like going to this pebble thing, you're around people that are like super famous. And so then you're just like, you're like, I don't know, dude, I'm just a comic.

And like a lot of people don't know who I am. And so you kind of are like, I don't know if anybody knows me. You're like I'm a comedian. You don't feel like you could, you know, just walk by someone and like as soon they know you or whatever. So it's, yeah, it's, you know, it may be this special. Maybe when I did that Netflix special, and then I started to do theaters. That was, because I remember I was at Carolines on Broadway, which was the last comedy club Brian Regan did before we went to theaters,

and I was at that show. And I remember him saying he was going to theaters. And so getting to that level was a moment of like, all right. And it wasn't even like I made it at all right. point but you're I I'm in a different group now like I can I can go do it you know what at I just did comedy magic club in Hermosa Beach and I did it to do some new jokes to work on my new act and then that we announced it maybe two days before I went and I was doing four shows and then I kind of like was like man are these shows like are people buying tickets to it and they

all sold out immediately that was a good moment because I had a moment of like really like dude can I do a theater in LA and I can't do a comedy club like no one's going to come so that was a moment of recently that I was like oh it's crazy because I just announced that and it went like two days before and it went very quickly so that was that was a good one we announced this 30 minutes ago and three random strangers showed up I know I don't even know these people are yeah doors open no it's bad to be here it's crazy um would you say your greatest athletic athletic achievement is you're inside the park home run in Little League. Yeah, easily.

That's a big deal. Yeah, that's another, that's another joke. I like that joke a lot. I can tell that joke still sometimes, too. Some of you forget jokes, that one I always kind of remember. But I got walked, went to first base, catch was holding the ball. So I went. I felt like he was daring me.

Ran to second. He overthrew second base. They over through third base. My third base coach told me to go home. I slid in the home to then be told it was only ball three. And I had to, I mean, I had to like wipe off, get my bat. Like everybody just gets back in place. And then I immediately strike out.

But so the one thing about that that I haven't told, I've told an interview, I never told on stage. But the year before, I had a legit triple off a walk. So you got to understand, when I'm. when this is happening this year, in my head, I'm like, this is what I do. Like, I thought, I'm dangerous. Don't walk me. Like, that's on you.

Like, you didn't hear about me? I've already got a, that was, the last year was a legit, I got a triple. So I was like, this is just how I get around. Just get me on the back, coach. Yeah, yeah. I'll get around. You're a money ball guy. We don't care about his average zero, but he's scored 12 bronze last year.

I had that confidence in my head of like, it's happening again. this is old news for me dude I go you know what maybe I'll try for home because I'm getting bored with triples off walks Billy Bean would love you dude that's my guy I got a little leaguer in Tennessee need him tomorrow he was there in the crowd

we're gonna pay him in Cracker Jack yeah that's good my turn I feel like mine are more like it's serious this time give me your favorite comic ever ever

It's a lot of Steinfeld and everybody Berg, African, probably David Tell. Brian Regan too, but I'm a big David Tell. David Tell is a big comic for New York. David Tell's not clean, but David Tells the true essence of a comedian in a club, and he's the most fun to watch.

I would say if I could pay, if I had to pay to watch someone, it would be him. It's not clean, but it's just fun. I got to check you out. Yeah, same. Oh, he hosted Insomniac on Comedy Central. And Attell, his first album is called Skanks for the Memories. Like it already? It's not, yeah, like if you're, I mean, it's not going to be the politically, you know, all that stuff.

But he's the one, and he was the comic in New York that we'd all go watch every night. He's been doing it for a long time. And just he's everyone, it's a cool story that I saw him. This is how much respect he's got. So when I was in New York, we were, as it has become, Boston Comedy Club. It was in New York, but it's called Boston Comedy Club. And so a lot of people come by there, Chappelle would always go there. You see Chappelle all the time.

And so when you would see all them, and you go to the cellar, too, they'd always pop in. So when Chappelle would pop in, he gets to just pop in and go up and whatever. And he kind of bumps everybody that's on the lineup. And Attel would always go up at the end. So Chappelle's on stage, and this is when Chappelle would start going on stage and do, like, he'd go up for an hour or two hours. or something like that. And in the other comics, you would just be,

you would just be like, well, Chappelle's here. You could either wait or you could just, they would pay you and you go home. And so a lot of comics would always go home. Atele walked downstairs, and Chappelle sees Dave Attell standing there. And he's the only comic who he'd have done this for. And then he looks at him, he goes,

oh, what's up, Atel? Chappelle says this on stage. And Tell, it's like, hey. And then Chappelle's like, have you gone on? And Attel goes, no. And Chappelle goes, all right, Dave Chappelle, everybody good night and walked off and got off stage and Chappelle was way more famous at that moment not saying it tells not famous but that was this is Chappelle show Chappelle so it's the peak but it was

the that it's the respect that it tells gets is that even Chappelle is like I'm not above like this dude I thought he said David Till at first I was like it was David Till but David Tell yeah yeah David Tell yeah he's a monster but that's I wouldn't have not to pick him as like that's your guy that's he's a monster he's a beast he's a guy that you learn it's about just jokes. I mean, the first time I did a Conan and you go do it again, I was like talking to him. You know, I'm a new comic and like, and I'm like, uh, God, I got to come up with five more minutes to do on the late night. It's like so hard. He goes, is it? It's hard. And then just walked away. And you're, and it's a moment that you know, it's, I mean, I imagine you'd have a

you'd have a got, you know, where it's like, you're like, oh, is it so hard. Figure it out, idiot. Like, no one cares. Like, just do your dumb jokes. and get out of you. It was so fast, too. Like listening, he wrote that, but it just sounds like train of thought type stuff. I'm like, I know he's been through every word of that act, but it just feels like gets up like, what should I talk about? And he starts going.

He's the ultimate. And he's definitely not clean. Yeah. Definitely not clean. The ultimate comics comic and just super fun. Yeah, probably like the best stage guy. Oh, yeah. He had another one, a fun story.

We're standing out like outside. This is, Insomniac was on. So in something like he would go to towns and go to bars. And so his fans would be like super drunk dudes. And they'd come up and like kind of grab him. The tail is kind of like, eh, like, you know, it's like uncomfortable for him. And Joe DeRosa, very funny comedian, Ben Bailey, host of Cash Cap. They were both standing there with Atel.

And this kid comes up to the tail and goes, Dave, what's up, brother? And starts grabbing him. And he's like, all right, man. And then he's, so Ben Bailey and Joe DeRosa sitting there. He goes, oh, have you met my two friends just stands there and watches it happen? It's like stuff like that that's around like New York. That's so funny. That's good.

We got to throw one golf in there. Give me your favorite boo weekly story. It's the orangutan. It's the only one. Oh, yeah. It's the, I don't know him at all. I've actually told his story for him. But when he fought an orangutanang, if you don't know the story, it's a, he goes to a fair when he's 15.

He's like super southern right. I've never met him. Oh, he's the most. Panhandle. Yeah. Big dude, is from Georgia or Florida Panhandle, right? Yeah. Yeah.

And then goes to a fair and does, they have the thing where you pay $5, pay $5,000 win 50 if you can last fighting this orangutan. Worth it? Worth it. And so he gets in there and the orangutan's got, and I just picture the orangutan just like arms down. And he said he's circling him and the orangutan just keeps like moving. Like the ringtent has no emotion.

in this at all. And he said he's going to, he faked right and he was going to punch left. So he faked right and they just woke up in his buddy's truck. The orangutan just laid him out. And it's, I mean, it's like a dream of a story to have as a comedian. It's the best thing I've ever heard. And I've never met him. John Augustine, who I'm really good friends with, just was played with him.

And he told me, I don't know, I haven't talked to, John didn't tell me if he talked to him. but I was like, you have to tell them that I've told that. It's the greatest story ever. So that's my favorite. Boo is the best. I'll give you a quick one on him too. He's playing with Graham DeLette, one with Canadian golfer, and Boo's got a dip in, takes the dip out, puts it back in the can.

And Graham's like, boo, did you just recycle your chew? He's like, yeah. He goes, boo, you're a millionaire. He goes, spits on the ring. He goes, multi. Boo's the best. I played with him actually at the team event in Zurich one year. Oh, yeah.

Dude, we would be walking down a fairway and there'd be some gators and he starts making their mating call and they start swimming across at us. And I'm like, okay, that's close enough. Let's get those things away. He is, you would love him. Boo, I would like to meet you and hang out here and hear those stories. He's one of one. Yeah.

That is for sure. That's what I like. Yeah. And it ain't an act. Yeah, yeah. That's real. That's what you want. Yeah.

That's what people, like, that's the authenticity is what, and that's what like the people like like and that's why that someone like that is like so perfect because you're like yo this dude he'd only wear rain pants for a while because like real material like aggravated his legs or something so it'd be 78 and sunny out and he'd be in rain pants there's a hot of shit imagineable you know he loves his natty light we were uh we had to go back out for the rain delay we had to play two holes at 730 we're finished at 8 o'clock getting the car to go back to the hotel for four hours we had two natty lights on the way home at 8 in the morning i was like god this guy's just a legend

It's real. I saw Rory Sabatini. I met him this week. He seems fun. He was getting after it. I would stick with boo. Yeah. Rory had a zipper on.

He had two zippers in his jeans. What? He had his normal zipper, and then there was another zipper on the gene. And that was like... Just for style? I don't, I guess so. I guess so. I liked it.

Yeah, that's a hot. I liked it because we're, I think, and then they were, because I was like, I think we're playing tomorrow. Are you going to wear that? And then, yeah, he did pretty good, dude. Like, I think he did. All right, Dejano. Like, so it's, yeah, I like, I like that.

If someone's just them. Yeah, he, whether it is, you're like, you, dude. True Slovakia. I'm on board with that. That's right. Yeah. Slovakia's finest right there. All right, my last one, I'm excited.

I hope there's one that stands out. I feel like all comics have one. You're a beast now. There has to be one show on the way up where you just tank, just bomb. nothing hit you have a worst bomb story yeah I mean there's a lot man like there's you know it becomes so much I performed for one guy once like he wouldn't we asked him to leave uh I was on stage I was like I don't want to do this because you'd be fine and then so I had to just do it uh so I didn't show her I waited table because the waiter didn't show up so I waited tables because I knew how to

wait tables and then I went on stage and then had to get right when I got off stage I had the guy he just goes, I take one more. I just got in the middle of a joke. I mean, yeah, in the middle of it. I mean, I literally, I go, good night, everybody. And I stay, once to off, he goes, maybe two more. And I was like, right, I had to go get.

Okay, let me get my apron. Just immediately back to like, you're nothing. Just kicked in the mouth, yeah. I, but one of them I talk about in a special, I performed for an audience that, the guy that booked me was a corporate event was a big fan, but the whole audience did not speak English. And it's like, I mean,

it's maybe a thousand people that don't speak English and it's just his family that does and so that one was i mean that you're just up there and it's just silence and it's chibberish yeah yeah i mean it's there's no there's no reason you just said anything you're just getting through it that's and that that's the stuff that you got your time i mean there is no timing there's just you're saying jokes and they're one that i did you know what to bring my dad back into so uh when i was just starting and i I'd go home. I was staying at home. My dad had a show at noon, and he was doing some, like, conference. And so he woke me up, and he was like, look, if you come do the show, I'll give you, like, 200 bucks. And, you know, so I'm like, all right, I'll go do it. So he has me go, and I go up at, like,

11.30 in the morning. And so people are eating. Like, they're at a buffet. They're eating. I mean, I just, no one even knows I'm on stage. I'm watching people, like, hug and, like, greet each other. and I'm up there telling jokes and nobody there's just no one would know that I'm there if you you know it just look like white noise yeah yeah you just up there saying so I mean just complete silence I do like 20 minutes and then my dad goes up and then destroys and then I realized like my dad made me do that just so he didn't have to sit through that so he was like I'll bring my son down so he just brought me to bomb for 20 I mean and the bomb before noon is a tough one Because your day's not even really getting going.

And you've already just set in one. And you've got to just the rest of the day, you're just like, what hat? Like, it's just very funny to bomb and just still have daylight on your face for a long time. Well, it can only go up. Yeah, that's true. A little brunch bombing. A little brunch bombing is a nice way to get it kicked off. Yeah, it's a good one.

All right. Last one. I believe you, do you travel with like a trainer slash health coach? I do. Okay. Can you please tell us how you met him? He was my barber. So he did a mustache today.

I didn't have mustache. He just did it today. He was my barber in Nashville, and I'd always go to him. And he got really into fitness, too, and knew a lot about it, lost a lot of weight. And then so, like, being on the road, it's just, you know, you're just eating. I mean, just nonsense, and it's hard. And so I was kind of like, you know, kind of getting a two-for-one where I was like, all right, if I bring him out to be my trainer, but then also to have him be my barber, it all kind of

worked out so like now he's out and he comes out with me he's out with me here now he might be one of one barber slash trainer i know i was like dude we could we could start a business if anybody needed this unique thing i'm the only one that needs the thing that he brings so i don't know who else needs it but uh yeah i know sagura has his trainer and it's a and he's a photographer so he kind of has you know but it's you can find some unique if you need someone just find something that can do a couple things and then you're like i could probably use both those things little jacked old trains yeah you guys need trimmed up we can go get you trimmed up dude a little bit of both take up on that yeah good man you're awesome man thank you so much really appreciate you absolutely

thank you so much big fan that was awesome all right well that was Nate bargatzy joining us on golf subpar what a dude he is just came off an incredible week at the AT&T pro em where he played with web simpson i'd tell you what I love the guy. I didn't know him very well. A friend of a friend introduced this, please. But the way he goes about it, he's so different than any other comedian I've ever heard. He's clean.

He's so dry, sarcastic. I love the guy. Being a clean comic this day and age, I feel like is an impossible task. Which also might be good because there's so much, it's hard to talk about anything anymore without people wanting to cancel you. I mean, virtually every topic is going to piss somebody off. So to be clean like he is, probably the safest route to go. but it's also the hardest route. And man, his stuff, his stuff is so good.

Like, the stuff he gets into with his wife and the arguments that have, like anybody's been married, like, yep, yes. Sometimes I feel like he's talking directly to him. I'm like, yes, dude, exactly. That's what's going on. The fell swoop stuff was one of my favorites. That one got a lot of run back in the day. But just all his stuff, he's like a breath of fresh air.

Dude, you could have a 12-year-old kid go to a show, or you could have a 65-year-old dude go to a show, and everyone's going to like it. That's rare. I told you one of my favorite things, you're not a big coffee drinker, so you don't understand, but the Starbucks bit he has,

where it's so intimidating going to Starbucks and ordering your coffee. I mean, that hit home with me. Like you said, the TSA thing, you know, Nathaniel, Nathan. Oh, yeah.

I mean, just unbelievable. You see how we got there, right? You see, you see. But it is the same, right? I don't dare go out of a limb and tell him my name is actually Nate. Nate, no. We got a guy with three names

try to get on this play. He's awesome, man. Hopefully we get out to Nashville, play some golf with him. Loves the game, by the way. He was all in at the Phoenix Open. Like, he was one of the few guys out there, like wanting to see some golf on 16.

It's like, where's the best place to, like, see shots? I was like, eh? They're not a lot. Maybe right by that TV over there? I took a few of them this week, too. Yeah, no kidding. Not bad. I was playing.

I'm heading, actually after this, I'm heading to the GIF, John Malinger's charity event, which I cannot believe I have to play golf today, but you know what? This is what we do. We're the hardest working event in show business. We got to keep it rolling. I know you're taking a little time out, but I got to keep it going over in L.A. with the Big Cat, Tiger Woods, teamed up at the Genesis.

Let's get to some picks. Let's do get to some picks. None of us took Scotty Shelfler last week, back-to-back champ. But this is going to be a fun one. Another designated event, elevated event. whatever you want to call it, massive purse. The stars are going to be out. Who are we going with?

Well, first, let me tell you about our amazing sponsor where you need to be placing your bets, Fanduel, and this should be good right now. Goal drive for show and bet for dough this golf season on Fanduel. Right now, new customers can get a no-sweat bet up to $1,000 back in bonus bets to tee off the PGA tour season. Use your no sweat bet on players like, oh, I don't know, the ones we're about to get to right now

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Or visit ccpg.org slash chat in Connecticut, 1-8009 with it in Indiana, 1-800-5-2-2-4700, or visit KSgamblinghelp.com in Kansas. 1-8-1877-770 stop in Louisiana or visit WvdWMD Gambling Gambling, help.org in Maryland, 18778, 8, 7.7, 8, HOP, N.Y or text Hope N.Y in New York. 1,800, 522, 4,700 in Wyoming or Colt, obviously, visit www. www.1-800 gambler.net in West Virginia. There you go. Any state you're in, we got somebody to help you out with your gambling problems. That's nice to know. What a read. What a read. That is, that rolls off the tongue. That basically reads itself. That's a wrong day. That's Sade Jack on Will of Fortune, just reeling it off.

Things just, it's natural. Well, let's get to those picks. I'm Vanna White. Oh, God. Van der White, best gig. That's maybe the best job in the history of. There's no, by the way, yeah, I don't know how we just got on that. But Van der White, I mean, you get paid like $8 million a year to, she only

have to flip them anymore. She just doesn't. No, no, dude. You don't want to get carpal tunnel. Just go ahead and touch that lit up square over there. Let's get, and dress up in a nice dress. We give you about $5 million a year. How's that sound?

No big deal. All right, well, let's get to some picks. Got a loaded field, a loaded gallery, a loaded couple of subpar commentators, no big deal. I'm going to go on a guy. I'll tell you what, my favorite. He's going off at 15 to 1. He blew a huge lead here a few years ago. He loves this golf course.

This is where he took down Jordan Speeat at the NCAAs. I'm going Justin Thomas. Okay, good. I'm going to spare you the commentary. I like the pick. You got to go with guys that hit big. balls. They got hit big balls, got big balls. That's what you need at Riv. Tony Feen out 18 to 1. Checks the box. I haven't a great, I was having a very solid week at Phoenix.

Bogied 17. The final round, set him back a little bit. Would have been in the top 10, but give me, give me a big tone out at, out at the Genesis. I like it. Ross in the playoffs to Max Homa there. This golf course, I feel like there's, you always see the same guys up there at the top of the leaderboard. It's, uh, there's certain guys that just love this golf course, they thrive around this golf course. And one of them is a dark course going at 65 to 1. He's lost 30 pounds. He's a ball striking machine.

Just played really well at San Diego. I expected to play really well in L.A. Keegan Bradford. Love it. Love it. I'm going to stick with the blueprint here of people that play well at Riv, long hitters, high ball hitters. Hideki Matsuyama, 37 to 1.

Likes the big stage. That is not a dark course, but all... It's fairly dark. I mean, 37 to 1. you get 37 on your money that ain't a that ain't a favorite well to all of our loyal wonderful listeners out there we apologize yeah for our voice it's not good but this is what happens after the wm phoenix open we left it all on the field we threw we threw our heart into this thing we made it a very great success i would say thanks to everyone for the larry everything you do um it was one hell of a week

We'll be back next week, hopefully sounding a little better, please. Impossible to sound worse, so I think that's a safe bet. All right, well, that's going to do it for us. We'll talk to you out next week's golf subpar.