Suggestible - Ham is the worst

Episode Date: November 28, 2019

Suggestible things to watch, read and listen to hosted by James Clement @mrsundaymovies and Claire Tonti @clairetonti.Mike Birbiglia: The New OneThe LetdownThe CrownPrince Andrew BBC Newsnight InterviewReady or NotSimply Nigella: Christmas SpecialFollow the show on Instagram and Twitter @suggestiblepod or visit www.planetbroadcasting.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey folks, it's Mark Maron from WTF. I travel all over North America doing stand-up and it's always good to know Airbnb is an option when I'm away from home. But if you're away from home, why not take your own place and Airbnb it? Airbnb your whole home to make some extra cash. Or if you have a spare room that's not in use, just Airbnb that. Whether you could use extra money to cover some bills or for something a little more fun, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. Bing bong, bing bong, bing bong, bing bong, bing bong. Welcome to the Bing Bong Show, where we just say bing bong for 30 minutes.

Bing bong. What's that from? Oh, I know. That is from that movie, Inside Out, that that Disney one where people are in their heads. Yeah, I was going to jump in, but I was stretching like a cat. You are stretching like a cat. We are never getting a cat. That was what you woke me up with this morning.

Yeah, I was like, we're not getting a cat. What if I said I really wanted a cat? P.S. Hello, this is suggestible. I'm Claire. We're both kind of allergic, like a little bit allergic to cats. Yeah. I don't have a problem with cats.

Hey, I am physically allergic and also mentally allergic. I don't have a problem with cats. Hey, I am physically allergic and also mentally allergic. Oh, my goodness. I hate cats. I'm putting it out there. You hate cats. Yeah, I do. See, I don't like cats, but I don't hate cats. They make me sneeze and they don't really love you.

You don't know that. No, they don't. Some people say that of children. If they were bigger, they would eat you. That was what I said to you once. No, that's what I think. You're stealing things that I said. I am not. Well, who knows?

We've been together so long. What's mine is yours and what's yours is mine. Yeah, but I do believe that. What's mine is mine and what's yours is mine. I think some cats would definitely kill you if they were big enough, even if they knew you. Yeah, they're always sizing you up. Yeah.

And swishing their tail. They're always unhappy cats. You can't make them happy. I'm going to get a lot of cat feedback. That is actually a thing as well. My friend who is a single is on Tinder and she said that she took, she had a friend, she took a photo of herself with her cat and put it on Tinder, thinking that maybe that would make people less interested in her. And it made people more interested in her. Really?

People are really into cats, mate. Yeah. Well, I guess they're a pretty popular pet. I mean, they're no dogs. No, but there's some weird sexy thing going on with cats. I don't think that's true. Yes, there is. Like furries, mate. There's a sexy thing going on about everything. That's a whole other subset.

Anyway. Anyway. It's your turn. Yeah, so we suggest things. Hat boy. We do two each. No, I'm not that. Would you be interested in dressing up as a cat?

For what purpose? Just to spice things up? No. To commit a robbery? Yes. To commit a robbery? Because they'd be looking for a real unbalanced lunatic. And I feel like nobody would ever think that I put on a cat suit and robbed a bank. Yeah, because that is your entire life strategy. Grey man it. That's right. Just grey man it. Yeah. Be middle of the road. Don't let anybody see you. Unremarkable.

Yeah, it's good. Except that you put your voice out on the tubes. I do. I do, unfortunately. Anyway, my first recommendation is for Mike Babiglia's new stand-up special. You might have seen some of his specials before. I've seen all of them. There's Thank God for Jokes, My Girlfriend's Boyfriend I Particularly Like, where he talks about the road for him to him getting married

and how he never wanted to get married. And this new one, which is called The New One, it's the story of him and his wife deciding whether or not to have a baby and kind of the outcome of this situation. Yeah, and like he didn't want to get married and then he got married and then he didn't want to have a kid and now he has a kid. Yeah, that's exactly it. So it's kind of what he's really good at doing is crafting a story.

I guess it's kind of like it's a narrative with like flashbacks and flash forwards. And just like life observations. Yeah, it's really interesting. Just observations. He's got a really kind of – I really kind of gel with his sense of humour and vibe. I really like him as like a human being.

And he also tells you like some terrible things about himself, which, you know, kind of makes the whole thing more interesting. But what's interesting about this one, I guess, compared to the other ones, because I feel like my life is kind of, I think I'm maybe five years younger than him, but we're kind of on a similar trajectory. So by the time like- To a Netflix comedy special.

No, I'm just saying this guy, like we're hitting the same points in our lives a similar trajectory. So by the time like you're- To a Netflix comedy special. No, I'm just saying this guy, like we're hitting the same points in our lives. Do you really think that people would want to watch you on a Netflix comedy special? No, I'm saying our life, we're the same age is what I'm saying. We're doing the same things. What would you talk about on your Netflix comedy special? I'd talk about how much my wife makes me do a podcast I hate.

No. Oh, it's not funny anymore, is it? You enjoy it. And actually, to be fair, I'd watch you in a Netflix comedy special. Would you? A lot of people would. Yeah. Well, look, okay, fine.

I'll just get one then. Well, you're on the same trajectory as famous comedian Mike Babiglia, apparently. You've completely misconstrued what I said. We're not even in the same ballpark creatively. He's obviously way better and way successful than me. Anyway, so this special though, it covers the lies that people tell you about when they're having a kid.

And I try to be truthful to people. When someone's like, what's it like having a baby? I'm not like, oh, the joy will enter your life and you've never known love and you'll never know what to do with yourself ever again. It'll be your most fulfilled you'll ever be. I mean, and maybe that's true of some people, but people fucking flat out lie to you when you have a kid and they try to trick you into having.

This is why your very close friend has not had a kid. I really think that you've drunk beers with him and set him on a course to never be that. Listen, it's not easy and your life completely changes. And it's something that I wanted to do and still want to do, but it's this decision that I made. Like I'm going into it being a teacher. I knew it was going to be hard. You don't know in what ways and to what extent,

but I knew I wasn't just going to sleepwalk through it. And so it's really – so that's how I frame it to people. Yeah. Essentially, yeah. Me too. I'm really honest about it as well because I think it helps. I think all this lying about how wonderful it is and it's just a miracle and it'll be the pinnacle of your whole life sets people up.

Yes. Stuff like postnatal depression. Yeah, exactly. Because it's really difficult and it is still, I stand by, one of the most incredible achievements of our life. Yes, yes, yes. We've all heard the cliche. No, it is.

And there are just these moments of like crazy laughing joy, amazing. And you feel so proud of them and it is the best. However, it also is the fucking worst thing and it is so hard and I think people need to know that too. Yeah. So if you're finding it hard, don't worry. We are too. If you're finding it hard, you're just not doing it right.

You've got to try harder. No. No, it is really hard. And, look, I mean people do parenting differently too and different kids are different. Some babies are just easier than others. And we've had like, we had a fairly difficult baby for reasons we won't get into, but we were lucky enough to have both of us working from home.

So that's kind of made a huge difference for us. It has. So we were kind of, well, there's certain things that I can't do, obviously, that you can. But yeah, that I think alleviated some things for both of us, I think being able to do that. Yeah. It really, it was wonderful.

Some people don't have that. So yeah. And I think it was wonderful for you too. And your relationship with our little person as well. It's been awesome, but yeah, I've really liked his take on it. I thought it was really funny. I did fall asleep. Well, that's good.

That's because you watched something after 7.30. You made that classic Claire mistake. Yeah, be better. Be more interesting, Mike Babiglia. Yeah, you should, Mike. But, yeah, it's more like it's also about like the lies that you tell yourself like when you're having a kid. They talk about how trouble conceiving, the lack of sleep.

Look, it's probably a little too close to home for me to like fully enjoy and to be like this is hilarious. It's like maybe like fully enjoy and to be like, this is hilarious. It's like maybe I'll enjoy this more in like 10 years' time. But he's very funny. And there's like a moment that you missed. There's like a big moment during the special, which I won't spoil here, which is quite entertaining and has this bit of a freak out. But look, it's well worth watching and everybody's got Netflix,

150 million people around the world or whatever it is. Yeah, it's definitely worth watching and everybody's got Netflix, 150 million people around the world or whatever it is, which is the population of the earth. Yeah. Do you know what the other show, I mean, this is a comedy special, obviously, and I love a comedy special, but if we're talking about stuff to do with parenting, the other comedy show, The Letdown, which is on the ABC, but I'm sure you could get it on YouTube and iTunes. If you are a new parent, don't watch it. It's way too close to home. You could get it on YouTube and iTunes. If you are a new parent, don't watch it.

It's way too close to home. Yeah. It's like watching TV. You put your kid down to sleep and then you're watching it. It's not like getting a break. No, it's terrible. And I've had friends who've watched it and just had to turn it off. Yeah, I don't want to stop watching.

I can't watch this. Yeah, it's too good. But it does get better. And I think if you're a little bit more distanced from it, it's a really great look at parenting and particularly the whole baby stage. It's really funny too. It's great. That's the letdown. All right.

Yeah, anyway, that's it. Watch it if you want to. What is your favourite of the Michael B. Lear? I like My Girlfriend's Boyfriend. Yeah, I love that too. They're all good so you can't really go wrong. Yeah. He's directed some movies.

Yeah. Yeah, he's really cool. I feel bad now that I said that you shouldn't do a Netflix comedy special. You would be great. It's never been a desire of mine to do stand-up. I hate being on stage. I'm not insulted that you think I couldn't get a multimillion dollar Netflix comedy deal despite having never done stand-up comedy.

Well, I thought that maybe you thought you could. No. Well, I don't know. I do not think that. Don't let your dreams be dreams. I'm not that funny. I think you're funny. Thanks, bud.

Look at him. Got him. Well, maybe I can just stand on stage and people are going to laugh at how funny look I am. We can wait for clean water solutions. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge Indigenous cultures. Or we can engineer access to clean water. We can acknowledge indigenous cultures. Or we can learn from indigenous voices.

We can demand more from the earth. Or we can demand more from ourselves. At York University, we work together to create positive change for a better tomorrow. Join us at yorku.ca slash write the future. Great. I'll be the future. Great. I'll be in the front row. All right. What's your crap recipe this week?

No, no recipe. I want to talk about a show, The Crown. The Crown. The Crown. You haven't seen it, so don't give that. I have zero fucking tolerance for the royal family. You know how Mason feels about the Lion King and the hierarchy? That's how I feel about the royal family. Both have how Mason feels about the Lion King and the hierarchy? That's how I feel about the royal family.

Both have equal political weight, I guess. I'm not saying they're all evil human beings, but I'm saying that idea of a monarchy and you're in charge just because your fucking dad was in charge, it's absolutely asinine. The system is broken. And I know they don't have any real power, but quite frankly, if they all got tipped into a volcano, my day would not change. Anyway, what were you going to say?

However, it makes for great TV viewing. I'd definitely watch them getting tipped into a volcano actually. That would make great viewing. It is quite strange because you do end up feeling weirdly sorry for them because it's a great show. So it's a historical drama. It's on Netflix. It's actually touted as one of the most expensive shows of all time

for television. And people say like how is that possible? It's because it's a period piece. Yeah, they're recreating Buckingham Palace. So estimates say that the first two seasons cost a whopping $130 million to shoot. Great. I hope the royals got a bit of that.

That would be amazing. Yeah. Holy moly. Just getting money for nothing. Don't worry about it. So roughly that means that per episode it's $6.5 to $13 million. Yeah, it's like Game of Thrones. Astronomical.

Just crazy. I mean it really is a viewing delight in that way. And it's just beautifully recreated. For example, the Queen's wedding dress for the first episode cost $35,000. Yeah, that's fine. That's normal. That's just one dress. Pounds or dollars?

Dollars. Yeah. US dollars or Australian dollars? US dollars. Wow. I know. Crazy McCrazy. So really the television series is about the reign of Queen Elizabeth II,

created and principally written by Peter Morgan and produced by Left Bank Pictures and Sony Pictures Television for Netflix. It grew out of Morgan's film The Queen in 2006. I remember that movie. And he staged the play The Audience in 2013. The first season covers the period from Queen Elizabeth's marriage to Philip, Duke of Edinburgh in 1947 to the disintegration of sister, Princess Margaret's engagement to group captain Peter Townsend in 1955, which is actually quite devastating.

And also, it's great. The second season covers the period from the Suez. Swayze. Someone tweet in and tell me how to pronounce that crisis in 1956. You don't need to with Swayze. I've got it. Don't worry. You don't need to. It's Swayze. I've got it. Don't worry, everybody. All right.

It's definitely Swayze. To the retirement of Prime Minister Harold Macmillan in 1963 and the birth of Prince Edward in 1964. So now we're on to the third season that's just been released. It's all been recast, doesn't it? Set in 1964. Yes, it's all been recast. So in those first two seasons, Claire Foy plays the Queen

and apparently she was almost going to say no to the role because she didn't think it would be a good idea. And she smashed it out of the park. She won Best Actress in the lead role and Best Actor for John Lithgow, which was just amazing and they've had lots of Screen Actor Guild Awards and all kinds of things. So it's really made her career clever. And she plays it beautifully. I think the difficulty with this show and with the Queen as a character is

that she never really, she didn't want to be the Queen. She never wanted to be that. And she's not a showman. Well, step down. Dissolve the monarchy. Yeah. No, but you really get a sense of the duty. And her husband, her father wasn't supposed to be the king and his

brother stepped down from being the king, which kind of put her family on a trajectory they were never meant to be on. Just watch the King's Speech if people haven't. Yeah, exactly. And so you kind of get this idea that really she'd be much happier stomping around looking after horses and living a quiet life. And instead she's kind of thrown into this duty-bound role but she takes it very, very seriously and it's just fascinating watching her and then Prince Philip and their relationship. That guy sucks, by the way. Like real life sucks.

Prince Philip. Yes. Yeah, he does. Matt Smith, though, plays him excellently as well. He was a Doctor Who. He was a Doctor Who. Very sexy man and he's great in this. Vanessa Kirby is Princess Margaret and her character arc is wonderful

and great too. She's kind of like the rebel of the royal family. Whoa, settle down. She smokes and drinks and gets involved in a lot of things. Whoa, calm down, everybody. That's not becoming of whatever we're talking about. In the third season, the Queen is played by one of my favourite characters, actresses, Olivia Colman.

I mean she's a bit of a character. She's a real-life character. She's a bloody real-life character. It's so interesting watching her play the Queen because she can't, there's like the Queen has, I shouldn't offend her, but like not a lot of personality really. I think she probably shields a lot of it. Yeah, I think so too.

But Olivia has to, she is a very comedic actress, but she kind of plays this very, very straight. Yes. But she does a lot with her face to kind of convey meaning. They don't portray her particularly well. This first and second season they do, but I feel like in this third season, her relationship with her son, Prince Charles, is really put under scrutiny.

What about her other son, the pedophile? What's that like? Yeah, well, they haven't touched. You don't see him at all. Yeah, I know. Interesting, right? I watched the entire interview with him. What's his name?

Prince Andrew. You said Andrew, you're right. Prince Andrew. Oh, that's a whole other thing in itself. That's a man who's never been questioned his entire life. You thought he could walk into that. I shouldn't say this, but I watched that before I started watching the third season of The Queen.

I watched The Crown. I watched the entire interview with Prince Andrew. And A, it made me really kind of sick to my stomach about the monarchy and the way that it works. And I never really thought that before. But B, it is kind of hilarious in its train crashes. Oh, he's an absolute buffoon of a man. And it's terribly sad.

You know the thing that struck me the most about that interview, and you can watch it on YouTube and I'll get Colin to put a link to it below, it's just so strange to watch someone who has so much privilege and so little self-awareness. He just had to do nothing. His entire life he just had to do nothing and he still fucked it up. Yeah. It's baffling to me.

It's so crazy. But he says some of the most crazy things like he can't have been sleeping with a 17-year-old girl that had been trafficked. He doesn't sweat anymore. Yeah, because he doesn't sweat. And he was at a pizza shop. It's just so strange. The whole interview is so strange.

The thing that did actually break my heart was that nowhere in the interview does he even suggest remotely. He has no empathy for anybody else. Yeah, any empathy for what the women had gone through, even if he wasn't involved. Yeah. Just the idea, like you just express remorse. You say, I'm so sorry.

I had no idea that Jeffrey Epstein was doing these things to women. And like basic stuff. You know? I can't remember the interview. She was great. I don't have her name in front of me. But she's like, do you regret your, you know, your friendship with Jeffrey Epstein?

And he doesn't even say, he's not like, yeah, because he's a monster. He trafficked children. You know, he's like, oh, no, because, no, because I've got some good connections and whatever. You're a prince. You don't need that. What is wrong with you? Like think. Yeah.

I just think his entire life he's just had people around him kind of laughing and kind of going along and then that's why he thought he could walk into this and he was smart enough to kind of dance his way out of it and he just fell on his face. What an absolute dummy and he should be in jail or at least look into it more than none. I don't know. Yeah, I know.

I know. It was Emily Matliss was the journalist for Newsnight, which is a really well thought of current affair program. Yes. Screening on the BBC. Probably. Well, it is. It's very highly regarded.

I believe it. And she does an excellent job interviewing him in Buckingham Palace, by the way. Anyway, so watching him and then going in to watch The Crown, it just makes you feel sick at the kind of privilege that they're living in, particularly when you think about the inequity that exists in the world. Whoa, it's massive. Wouldn't you, and I know people don't want to give up stuff, but wouldn't you look around and think maybe I could kind

of portion some of this off somewhere to someone? I mean, you've just, your ancestors had the most land and they killed the most people to get the most land. Yeah, I know. That's it. I know. You're not special. It's not from God.

You're just a person. I know, but I think that's what's so interesting when you watch The Crown is that it really does go into the psyche of the royal family. And they're kind of bound as well in the system because it is a system. It's tradition, it's culture, it's embedded in their constitution, embedded in their parliamentary practices. And I know it's more like ornamental now, it's culture, it's embedded in their constitution, embedded in their parliamentary practices. And I know it's more like ornamental now than it's ever been before. Yeah, and there is something to be said for duty and honour and stability, all of those sorts of things. And I do think you really get a sense that the characters,

not the characters because they're real people, are grappling with that as well and their role. And it does kind of, I initially was like, well, this is all superfluous, how ridiculous. But the more and more you examine it, it is more complex than that. I think any kind of leadership of a country and democracy is more complex than we think. You know, there are moments in this where you see her just,

she is the one consistent person in their entire government, right? And she sees, you know, grey-haired Prime Minister after grey, all blokes, by the way, grey-haired Prime Minister. Not thatcher. Yeah, I know, but haven't got to her yet, just rolling through, right? And there are moments where the Prime Minister really is not doing very well and the country is kind of falling over. There are moments where there's almost a coup at one point

and all kinds of things. But she is this kind of like impartial, staid figure. And there is something comforting, I think, for a lot of people. But I think that's the problem, though, because it's a fantasy. It's not real. There can't be one person who holds everything up. It's ridiculous. No, but be one person who holds everything up. It's ridiculous. No, but she doesn't actually hold everything up. But I think there is something to be said for someone who is impartial. She doesn't actually control the government.

No, I understand that. But she does have powers to step in. I don't know. I don't think any system of government is perfect. However, I do think that democracy is the best one we have. And look, it could use some work. perfect. However, I do think that democracy is the best one we have. And their British democracy, for all its faults, I think is still one of the stalwarts of democracy globally, right? And for all its faults, and there are so many, it is just a really, I'm not saying I'm for or against anything. I just think that The Crown itself as a TV show is a really good examination of that.

I could. Fair enough. I also think really interestingly they play – Prince Charles introduces his character, played by Josh O'Connor, and Diana doesn't come into it until season four. But they introduce Josh as the Prince of Wales and it's the – one of my – I think my favourite episode is when Josh's character, so Prince Charles, is inaugurated or whatever the word is,

as Prince of Wales and he has to go to Wales and learn to speak Welsh so he can do his maiden speech in Welsh. And what he learns there and the kind of insight you get into his character is really, really interesting and he kind of steps out of line of protocol to learn more about the Welsh culture. And he kind of goes in there flippantly, not wanting to be there and comes out as a much deeper person. And it's just, it's just really interesting.

Anyway, that's enough of that. What's your next one, Sonny Bar? My next one is a movie I really enjoyed. It's called Ready or Not. It was directed by Matt Bettelini. I said that wrong. Alpen and Tyler Gillett. We're doing really well with the names.

Oh, we're crashing it. It's not doing well. We are not doing well, James. We're doing very well. With these words. It's bad. It stars Samara Weaving, who you might know as Hugo Weaving's niece. Didn't, but that's awesome.

She is. I bet she's great in her own right. She is. I thought you'd know. I was trying to bait you, all right? Yeah, I could tell. You're going all gleeful. And Adam Brody, who you might know from The O.C.,

and Andy McDowell, who you'd know from probably Four Weddings and a Funeral. Anyways, she marries into this family, this really rich dynasty, where they have this fortune in games, like parlor games, board games, card games, things like that, right? And they live in this ridiculous mansion. And the idea is that everybody who marries into this family has to draw a card from this deck and then has to play this particular game, whatever. It could be checkers, it could be whatever. But the card that she pulls, which doesn't happen very often,

is for hide and seek, which essentially means that everybody in the, she has to hide in the mansion while everybody in the family, including a husband, or he's supposed to, is then trying to kill her because an ancestor of theirs made a pact. Well, they think with the devil, and if they don't complete this ritual every time somebody comes new into the family, then something, they'll all die, right? Oh, God.

So that's the idea. So it sounds ridiculous, obviously. It sounds ridiculous. Also, I'm never watching these. No, but the thing is, though, it's quite good and quite, like, darkly funny and she's great. And look, it is gory but it's not like insane.

Is that what you were watching when I came in and you were like, leave, don't come in? Do not watch this, yeah. But it's really over the top. And also it's really well made. It was only for $6 million but it made something like $57 million, which is the model of filmmaking which I really like because you can turn a profit obviously quite well and also make something

with a very reasonable budget. And the ending is just ridiculous. It's a ridiculous movie and I really enjoyed it. It's a great kind of revenge fantasy kind of. Because you don't normally like horror. No, I like good horror and it's not so much. It's probably more suspense than horror but there's definitely horror. Like jump scares? Yeah, no, there's no jump scares. I can I like good horror. And it's not so much – it's probably more suspense than horror. Like jump scares?

Yeah, no, there's no jump scares. I can't handle jump scares. I jump so much. You know, when you go to the movies and you sit next to me and then you laugh at me because I do jump scares. I remember. I think the last scary movie you saw was Alien Covenant, which is a terrible –

Yeah, you made me see that. I didn't make you. I didn't make you. I said, I'm going to see this, and you were like, all right. But we both hated that movie. Yeah. It was so dumb and bad. I didn't make you. I said, I'm going to see this. And you were like, all right. But we both hated that movie. Yeah. It was so dumb and bad. It was a dumb movie.

It was bad. I like the first Alien. I love Sigourney Weaver. She's great. Ooh, she's great. Alien and Aliens. And even some of Alien 3. But anyway, ready or not, it's still in cinemas.

Go and see it. It's quite good. Yeah. Okay. I won't see it. However, I think Yeah. Okay. I won't see it. However, I think other people should. I won't stop you. Live your life.

That's right. All right. Is it my turn again? It's your turn. You haven't got much time, Claire. Yeah, I know. I'm keeping track of it. You better hurry up.

Don't be looking at me. Oh, my goodness. I know. I know. I know. I know you know. I'm stuck. I get so excited.

Okay. So, it's the most wonderful time of the year. I know that you are the Grinch of Christmas. However, every week now until Christmas, I'm going to be recommending a Christmas theme thing. And you can suck your balls. Oh, you saved it. Don't worry.

You really pulled back there at the end. Well done. For any kids listening. I'm so sorry. You really pulled back there at the end. Well done. For any kids listening. I'm so sorry. You really are that excited. I just get so excited. I got carried away. I started with all the swears.

Anyway, I am recommending today Simply Nigella's Christmas Special. Now, it's an old one from a few years ago. Nigella Lawson hosts it. Obviously, it's Simply Nigella. She's amazing. I love Nigella Lawson. Her recipes are always spot on. And not only are they spot on, they're also really enjoyable to cook,

which I think is important. She makes things pretty easy. And when you actually follow her recipe, very enjoyable. The chocolate pours. You can stir it around. I love it. If you, like me, would like to get into the Christmas spirit and are starting to think about what you might make for Christmas lunch.

I'm not. Yeah, I know you are because you don't do bloody anything at Christmas time. You just complain. Well, we're not doing Christmas this year. And then eat the delicious food. Unlike last year when we did two Christmases, one after the other. Both at our house. It was so good.

It was insane. And I loved every minute, most of it, until I lost my mind a little bit. But still, this particular Christmas special you can find at the BBC website or also on YouTube, and she recommends a whole lot of brilliant recipes for a really easy Christmas lunch that is stress-free. So slow-cooked black treacle ham. My God, this is so good. I've made it before.

Basically, you just pour black treacle over ham, and then you wrap it up in foil really tightly so it doesn't shrink and then you put it in the oven for a long time. I'm a real fan. I've slow cooked meat. Turn off now if you don't like cooking, but I love it. So suck balls out there if you're not into it.

I don't know why I keep saying that. You don't have to suck balls, anybody. I'm really sorry. No, you don't. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Anyway, so you put on your slow cooked like ham in the oven and then you make your sweet and sour slaw, which is also delicious.

Lots of like fresh cabbage and a slightly Asian feel to it with some chilies and also some rice wine vinegar. It's a sheer delight, very crunchy, crisp, a little bit sweet and spicy. Yum. And then she also has a potato and pepper bacon. Pepper for anyone in Australia is like capsicum. So it's like red capsicum. Yes. All cut up and nice and crispy in the oven. Olive oil, salt and pepper, all the delicious things.

And so that's all really simple. I think my personal favourite meal is a ham or a pork, a slaw, and some kind of potato-y thing. That to me is a dream on a plate. Delicious. Scott over at NerdSync, I'm a big fan of, he's a good dude as well, real life good dude, he said this thing on Twitter the other day. He said ham is the worst meat, even if you think you like it,

it's not good. Well, he's a fool. No, here's the thing though. He is a goddamn fool. I thought about it and I'm like, I like ham. But then I thought about. Christmas ham. I don't think. There is nothing better than a Christmas ham.

I don't think there is another meat that I like less than ham. Yeah, but that's. You like pork. Pork is like. I do like pork. And I know. I'm sure there are lots of vegetarians and vegans. And I do really care about the planet.

And I know it's a very good planet. I do. But it's so delicious. Just let me have my ham. You're such a killjoy. You hate everything to do with Christmas. Why? Why do you just come and like just gloom all over my Christmas cheer?

Let me have a Christmas special with Nigella. How about this? When I need to be cheered up, sometimes I just go and watch Nigella's Christmas special. Next week. She has fairy lights while she cooks. Next week I will recommend a Christmas something, all right? Will you?

Yes. Yeah, you'll probably recommend shitting in a pudding container and putting it in the oven and then serving it up for Christmas lunch. Here you go, everybody. That's what I think about Christmas. You don't need to put your shit. Shit pudding doesn't need to be baked. You know that more than anybody.

I'm so excited. I'm going to squint to me again this week. You did a line of cocaine as long as this table. No, I ate some fruitcake before. Oh. That's what's happened. Fruitcake, it's not even Christmas. I know, but I bought some because you know how much I love Christmas.

I've started early. Also, fruitcake – I've started early. Also fruitcake. I've already put up our Christmas tree. Fruitcake is the ham of cakes. No, I know, but I really felt like it. We're getting off topic and we're running out of time. I just want to quickly talk about the desserts and then I'm done. So cider and five spice bunt cake.

My God, this cake. If you don't have a bunt tin, you can just put it in a regular tin. No one will know. But it is like gingerbread. You'll know. The deliciousness of gingerbread. Who doesn't love gingerbread? But it's the lightness of a cake and you serve it with a smoky,

salted caramel sauce. Mate. Divine. And Christmassy all in one. Oh, so good. Well done, Angel. And then her buckwheat triple choc cookies are also so good and gluten free. So amazing.

Anyway, I'm done now. But that is my recommendation. If you want to get into the Christmas spirit. No. And like old Christmas shitty pants over there, then I highly recommend going to Watch Her Special. I like the day, but everything else about Christmas can go into that volcano. All right.

I'm just sick of the commercialization of it. You don't do anything for it anyway. Oh, my goodness. Oh, my God. I love it. I do actually really like the day. I agree. I don't actually like the commercialization.

I don't particularly love all the consumerism. I just love all the traditions and the lights and the ginger spice and the carols. I love a carol. We all love carol. We're done. Okay. So, look, if you want to rank the show, rate the show, you can. I don't know why you will, but you can.

You can. Just like Jace Onata. Oh, no, Atta. Anyway, this review says emojis are a young man's game, which is the thing I think I said in the episode. It's given it five stars. Love the podcast. Who knows what emojis mean?

They're subjective. That being said, the two hands up emoji means praise, I think. So there you go. We're learning things too. Do you have a suggestible from somebody writing in? I do, correct. This is from Mario Barayo Jr. Cool name, mate.

It is travel journals, a wholesome idea. I love the show and I would love to suggestible something to anyone out there with a long- friendship. Buy two journals, give one to your best mate and keep the other one for yourself and keep journaling in it and fill it with stickers, stamps and photos and drawings and whatever else you want. Then the next time you see a friend, trade journals. I do this with my friend who lives on the other side of the country and we just traded journals about a month ago. I won't see her for another few years. The idea is to trade journals every time we meet up.

That way we're committed to seeing each other at some point and not to let our friendship die or fizzle out. I don't see her much, but because of the journal, it feels like she's right there. That's a really good idea. That's a really sweet idea, Mario. Good on you, mate. And thanks for listening to the show.

All right. Thank you so much. This has been Suggestible. You can follow us on the Twitters, on the Instagrams, on the Facebooks, at SuggestiblePod. Thank you to Rock Hollings, as always, for editing this show and editing our ramble. I can't believe he

has to do this. Particularly editing out James' gloominess. You can't. I've put gloominess all peppered throughout this episode. Do you know what? When you die, I'm not going to put James Clement on your tombstone. I'm just going to say Mr. Gloomy. Yeah.

He lies Mr. Gloomy, Grinch of Christmas. Also, everybody, just so you know, when I die, it's not an accident and that's all I'm going to say. So we've all got things going on when I die. What do you mean? Let's just say that maybe somebody took me out. What? Are you insinuating that I'm going to murder you?

I'm not insinuating anything. You're insinuating I'm going to murder you. Anyways, guys, we've got to- And you would be correct. We've got to get out of here. Suck your own balls, everybody. No. Goodbye.

We wish you a Merry Christmas. It's like a month out. This podcast is part of the Planet Broadcasting Network. Visit planetbroadcasting.com for more podcasts from our great mates i mean if you want it's up to you introducing uber teen accounts an uber account for your teen with always on enhanced safety features your teen can request a ride when you can't take them you'll get real-time notifications along the way your teen feels the sense of independence you can't take them. You'll get real-time notifications along the way. Your teen feels the sense of independence.

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