Sunday Homilies with Fr. Mike Schmitz - 03/21/21 To The Heart: Vulnerable and Able

Episode Date: March 22, 2021

Homily from the Fifth Sunday of Lent. A heart that is too soft has to be protected. A heart that is too tough can’t be touched. What good is it to have a heart that can be hurt by this world? Many choose to numb themselves rather than feel the pain of life. But becoming numb leaves us with a heart that is unable. Unable to feel pain but also unable to feel joy. As Christians, we are called to have a heart like the heart of Jesus: vulnerable and able. Mass Readings from March 21, 2021: Jeremiah 31:31-34 Psalms 51:3-4, 12-15Hebrews 5:7-9 John 12:20-33 Download the Homily Study

So years ago, there was a man named Frank who went to a party, and he was introduced to a woman named Maude. And Maude was a student at Cornell. Ever heard of it? And Frank's cousin said, Frank, I am happy to introduce you to Maude Gage. I am sure that you will love her. Frank took one look at her, and he said, well, Miss Gage, consider yourself loved. And she looked back at him and said, Frank, that sounds like a promise. I'm going to be sure and hold you to it.

And Frank, in fact, that's what he did. He did everything he could his entire life to love his wife, this woman who became his wife, Maud. They moved from the East Coast after they got married. They moved to Aberdeen, South Dakota for whatever reason. And they had four boys. And like a lot of dads, Frank told his boys stories. He just made up stories and told him about. about boys who lived on the plains of South Dakota and about the weather of South Dakota and the storms and the tornadoes and about boys who would go off to distant lands and have all these adventures.

Maude loved these stories that Frank would tell their sons and she encouraged Frank to write him down. And so he started to a little bit. Maude had a sister named Helen and Helen had a little girl that Maude absolutely fell in love with. little baby named Dorothy Louise Gage. I don't know why. You know, Maud had her own kids. She had her own sons. But for some reason, this little baby just captured Maud's heart. And the problem is Dorothy also broke Maud's heart. Because when she was about one years old, this little baby got sick and then just grew weaker and weaker and then died. And her aunt, Maud, had given her heart away, and it was taken.

It was wrenched. It was broken. And Frank, who promised to do everything he could to love her, he would have done anything to heal Maude's heart. But all he had, all he had was his stories. And the question is, you know, what good are stories, what are stories able to do in the midst of a world that can break your heart? This question, what are stories able to do in the midst of a world that can break your heart? Because honestly, that's the world you and I live in, right? It's, we live in a world that can and will break our hearts. kind of reminds me of that quote we mentioned a couple weeks ago from C.S. Lewis

When he said, love anything and you risk your heart being wrenched and possibly broken. Give your heart to anything and it will be broken. And I know this. I know that you've experienced this. I think sometimes people say, oh, father, you work with college students, you know, they haven't had the chance to really suffer yet. And I know that's not true. I know that many of you have suffered greatly. You have experienced loss.

You've experienced betrayal. You've experienced people who are taken away. are sometimes worse people who walk who walk away. So the question keeps coming back up, right? How do you make it in a world? How do we get through a world that will break your heart? I think a lot of times we have two options. That are two options are either I'm going to keep my heart soft.

Like I'm not going to be someone who becomes bitter. So I'm going to keep my heart soft. Or make the other decision. We say, listen, I'm not going to get hurt. I'm going to callous my heart. And those seems like our only two options, right? Either keep your heart soft and protect it or make your heart calloused. And you get hurt every time if you've decided to make your heart soft, every time we get hurt and we think, well, this is what it is to be hoping.

This is, it just gets beat up every time. Or if, again, if we've decided, no, I'm going to let my heart become calloused, then basically I'm just going to turn off the emotions. That problem with that is this. The problem with that is whether our heart is soft or calloused, whether our heart is weakened or hardened, we end up with the same thing. We end up with a heart that is unable. Whether you've decided to have a soft heart or to have a calloused heart, we end up with the same kind of of heart, a heart that is unable. Because a callous heart, it's unable to be hurt. Yeah, that's awesome. It's unable to be broken. It's unable to feel, but also it's unable to grow. A callous heart is unable to be comforted. A callous heart is unable to love. A callous heart is unable to be loved. And a callous heart is unable to trust. A soft heart is just as bad. A weak heart is unable to stand.

A weak heart, a soft heart is unable to try. A soft heart is unable to be bold. It's unable to with the harsher realities of this world. A soft heart is unable to love back. And a soft heart doesn't know how to trust well. You know, we started the series at the beginning of Lent, and this is the last part of this whole series called To the Heart. And we talked about how if we're going to make a Lent that really makes a difference in our lives,

not just for the next 40 days, but for our entire lives, we have to do more than just fast a little bit more, or pray a little bit more, or give a little bit more. We want to have hearts that are changed. We want to have hearts that trust God in a way that we've never trusted God before. And what that means is we have to let him get to our hearts. But the problem is, if my heart is too soft,

I have to protect it. If my heart is calloused, he doesn't get to touch it. So God has to be able to get to the heart. I don't know if you've ever thought about this. Like in life, in this world, have you ever wondered if it would just be simpler to just be soft or calloused? If you ever wondered, if it would even better,

if it would be even better if you just didn't have a heart, if you've ever really really experienced that pain sometimes it's like just maybe it would be better to not even have a heart in the first place if it can be broken like maud's heart was broken you frank he said i wish i would do anything i would do anything to heal this heart of my wife but all i have is my stories so what he did he took his stories he took his stories about these boys living on the plains of south dakota and he said well instead i'll i'll change the title character to change the protagonist to a little girl. And she'll be precocious and adventurous and curious.

Instead of living in the plains of South Dakota, she's going to live on the plains of Kansas. And she's going to be raised by her aunt, Maude. And she'll call her Auntie M. And he changed the name of this little girl who died, Dorothy Louise Gage, to Dorothy Gale. And she was transported to a far-off country, far-off land, where she met a lion without courage,

she met a scarecrow without a brain, and she met a tin man, without a heart. All these characters, all unable, unable to be brave, unable to be wise, unable to love. There's a scene in the book, if you ever read the book, there's a scene where the tin man goes to the Wizard of Oz, and he tells him, here's what I want. I want more than anything else, I want to have a heart. And the Wizard of Oz says back to the Tin Man, he says, I think you're wrong to want a heart. It makes most people unhappy. If you only knew it, you're in luck not to have a heart.

Easier not to have a heart. Again, here's the wizard saying, I think you're wrong to want a heart. It makes most people unhappy. If you only knew it, you're in luck not to have a heart. Maybe it'd just be easier, right? Maybe easier to have a callous heart or a soft heart or a numb heart. Heart that was unable.

Easier to not have a heart at all. But here's the thing, is what the wizard didn't know. The Wizard of Oz didn't know is that the tin man wasn't always a tin man. that if you've ever read the books, the tin man started out as a real man. And when Dorothy and the scarecrow come upon the tin man in the woods and he's all frozen solid or rusted solid,

he tells them his story. And here's the story, it's kind of a longer piece of the thing, but if you've only seen the movies, you might not know this, and so it goes on and on. And he says to Scarecrow and says to Dorothy, he says, before this moment, he said, I was in love, I was a real man, and I was in love with this munchkin maiden.

This beautiful munchkin maiden who worked for this mean old woman, and so I fell in love with her, and I wanted to marry her. So I worked very hard at my wood chopping. He was a woodcutter. Worked very hard at my wood chopping so that I could take her away from this mean old woman, and we could be together as husband and wife. But the wicked old woman did not want that to happen.

So she asked the wicked witch of the east, and the wicked witch of the east cast a spell on my axe. He said, I was chopping away at my best one day, for I was anxious to get the new house and my wife as soon as possible, and the axe slipped all at once, and it cut off my left leg. This at first seemed a great misfortune, for I knew a one-legged man could not do very well as a wood chopper, so I went to a tinner and had to make me a new leg out of tin.

And the leg worked very well once I was used to it, but my action angered the wicked witch of the East, so for she had promised the old woman that I should not marry the pretty munchkin girl. When I began chopping away, the axe slipped again and cut off my right leg. And again, I went to the tiner, and again he made me a leg out of tin. After this, the enchanted axe cut off my arms, one after the other. But nothing daunted. I had them replaced with tin ones.

the wicked witch then made my axe slip and cut off my head. And at first I thought that that was the end of me. But the tinner happened to come along and make me a new head out of tin. And I thought that I had beaten the wicked witch then. And I worked harder than ever. But little did I know how very cruel my enemy could be. She thought of a new way to kill my love for the munchkin lady. And she made my axe slip again so that it cut right through my body,

splitting me into two halves. and once more the tinner came to my help and made me a body out of tin, fastening my tin arms and legs and head to it by means of joints, so that I could move around as well as ever. But alas, how I had no heart. So then I lost all my love for the munchkin girl, and I no longer cared whether I married her or not. I suppose she's living with the old woman still waiting for me to come to her.

He then goes on to talk about how he got caught in the rain, and what he did before that, He just kept chopping down trees, kept chopping down, kept doing work, forgetting about his love for this woman that he loved, and he gets rusted, right? And he's standing there in the woods, and he describes it. He says, I stood there for a whole year. And during that whole year, I had time to think, frozen in the woods.

And of all the things that I lost, nothing hurt as bad as the loss of my heart. And that's why I'm going to Oz. I will ask him, he will give me a new heart. And I will come back and take away the munchy. lady and I will marry her. So here's Oz who says you don't know what you're asking for. It's better not to have a heart. And here's a tim man who says you don't know what you're talking about. Because I know what it's like to live with a heart and to live without a heart. I know what is to live with a heart that can be broken. I know what it is to live as someone who just goes to

this life numb, soft or calloused. And I want a new heart. Heart that's no longer unable. what he's saying is, here's my Christian slant on this, he's saying basically, I want a heart like Jesus. Because I don't know what you picture when you picture a heart like Jesus, but sometimes we picture a heart that's really soft and so impossibly soft that it can't do anything. Or we picture a heart of God that can't even be touched. It's a heart that can't be moved, his heart that's indifferent to everyone. And yet, what's the picture of Jesus' heart that we get in the scriptures? It's not indifferent, and it's not weak. In the second reading today, it's Hebrews chapter 5. What does it say? It says, in the days when Christ,

was in the flesh, he offered prayers and supplications with loud cries and tears. And we've seen this. We think of this every time we hear the story of the passion. Jesus in the Garden of Githemite, he's not just sitting there saying, well, the next is the cross. He's on his face in front of the Father saying, Father, let this cup pass from me. And he's sweating blood. He is not indifferent. He's not calloused. And he's not weak. In fact, even the gospel today in John chapter 12, what does Jesus say? He says, Father, I am troubled now. And not just like, I'm slightly bothered. I am troubled means I am deeply, deeply grieved. He is not indifferent. He's not apathetic and he's not unable. He's not callous

and he's not soft. In fact, what does he go on to say? He says, yo, what shall I say? Save me from this hour? This is the hour that I came. So he is something more. Jesus is something more. He's strong but not calloused. He's vulnerable. This is the key. Jesus is vulnerable, and a heart that is vulnerable is a heart that is able. Heart that's callous is unable. A heart that's soft is unable.

A heart that's unable, but a heart that's vulnerable is a heart that's able. It's able to be hurt, but it's also able to be mended. It's able to be broken, but it's also able to be loved. A heart that is vulnerable is a heart that's able to be abandoned, and it's able to be found. his heart was able to be troubled but was also able to glorify God a heart that is vulnerable is a heart that is able

you say okay what does that mean what that look like if I had had if you were to have a heart that's vulnerable what's that look like it means that it's not so safe that it has to be it's not so soft that it has to be protected and it's not so tough that it can't be touched a heart that's vulnerable vulnerable is a heart that can be touched by this world Heart that's vulnerable is a heart that can actually be touched and affected by others and above everything else.

A heart that's vulnerable is a heart that is able to be touched by God himself. Again, it's not so soft that it has to be protected and it's not so tough that it can't be touched. God has to, if this is going to be the case, God has to be able to get to the heart. That can only happen if we trust. that we have to actually trust enough to be vulnerable. And what that means is that there will be pain. That means that there will be lost. That means that there will be betrayal.

It means that you will risk. It means that there's no guarantees. If you're vulnerable, you will be able, but you will be able to be hurt. If you're vulnerable, you will be able. But you'll also be able to be hurt. I know a lot of you know a woman named Bray Brown. Bray Brown is a researcher. She's a speaker.

She's an author. She does research on the areas of shame and vulnerability. And she researched people across the country who are the most vulnerable. People who weren't soft, people who weren't callous, people who weren't numb, those who were incredibly vulnerable. And she found they all had two things in common. The first thing that truly vulnerable people had was they had a strong sense of love and belonging. Basically, they trusted in their own worthiness.

They trusted that someone knew them and someone actually loved them. That's the first thing. They trusted that someone knew them and someone actually loved them. The second thing that every vulnerable person had in common was they didn't talk about vulnerability as something being comfortable or safe, and they didn't talk about it as being something that was excruciating. They simply talked about it as something that was necessary. They weren't vulnerable because it was easy.

They weren't vulnerable and it was awful. It was just, it had to be. They had to be vulnerable. It was necessary because they realized in my life, in order to be able, I have to be vulnerable. the thing for all of us. These two things. If you trust that you've been made it on purpose, if you trust that God actually knows you and loves you, then you have everything you need, you have everything you need to be vulnerable. That your life is not an accident. That even when

everyone else just hurts and walks away, here is God who actually sees the hurt and comes close. I think because of you, us, us knowing that we're loved, the fact that you know you're loved, it means you have to be vulnerable because you know you have to be able and you have to be able to love, you have to be able to belong, you have to be able to fulfill the purpose that God made you for.

And we realize that being vulnerable is risky because as I said, there's no guarantees. It means you'll be able to fail. If you're vulnerable, you'll be able to fall. If you're vulnerable, you'll be able to break and you'll be able to be betrayed. and all of that stuff can just make us so anxious, right? It's just like, I'm saying all these things.

You're like, okay, I'm getting more stressed out, Father. Every moment you tell me that if I'm going to be vulnerable, I'm going to be able to be broken, yes, and we get stressed. And what do we do when we get stressed? What do most people do when they get stressed? We get anxious, we just decide to numb ourselves. And what happens when we numb ourselves is we just scroll. I don't want to have to think about this.

I don't have to feel what I'm feeling. And so I just keep scrolling, keep scrolling. Keep scrolling. Are we binge? You know, any kind of binging, you guys know this. Even if, as I binge on a TV show, at some point, there's what they call the law of diminishing returns, right? At some point, the awesome TV show is like, we need to take a break. But if I can't take a break, what am I doing?

I'm numbing. Same thing is true when it comes to alcohol. Alcohol is great. But if I keep drinking, I can't stop. What am I doing? It's no longer great. I'm numbing. Or food.

I'm binging on this. It's not great. It's just, I'm just numbing. Or sleep. I'm binging on this. I'm just numbing. And one of the things Bray Brown points out is she says that it's impossible to selectively numb ourselves. We can't selectively numb ourselves.

We can't selectively numb the pain and not also numb the joys of life. Because if I numb the pain, I'm also numbing the joy. If I numb the anxiety, I'm also numbing the peace. If I numb my grief, I'm also numbing the potential for healing. and if I numb my heartbreak, I'm also numbing my ability to love. So what do I do? What do we do? We have to choose vulnerability, which means what? It means that if you're going to be vulnerable, that you can get messed up.

I remember we had a student years ago who pointed out the difference between being transparent to people and being vulnerable with people. She gave the example. She said, if you're transparent to somebody, it's like you're in a fishbowl and they're on the outside and they can see everything in the fishbowl. that's being transparent, but if you're being vulnerable, this means you're inviting them into the fishbowl. And if they're in your fishbow, they can move stuff around.

If they're in your fishbow, they can make the fishbow messier than you wanted it. If they're in your fishbowl, they can leave a mark. Because that's what it is to be vulnerable. It means that someone is able to leave a mark. When it comes to being vulnerable to God, it means that God can leave a mark. He can leave a mark on your heart. That's the first reading today, Jeremiah 31, where God basically promises,

I'm going to leave a mark on your heart. If you let me, if you let me come close, I will leave a mark on your heart. In fact, he says it like this. It says, in our translation it says, I will write my law on their hearts, but another translation says, I will engrave my law on their hearts.

Not just covering the surface, but digging in and leaving a mark. Question. Do you and I, do we trust God enough to let him get that close to the heart? Do we trust God enough to let him get that close to our heart? Because that's what this whole Lent has been about.

You know, this Lent has not been about, again, as I said, praying a little bit more or giving a little bit more or fasting a little bit more. This whole Lent has been about this invitation. Do I trust God enough to let him get to the heart? Do I trust God enough to let him carve his, name on my heart, just like your name is carved on the palm of his hands. Frank Baum, he couldn't heal his wife's heart, but she trusted him. And because of that, he could touch her heart.

At one point, the Scarecrow and the Tin Man are having an argument about what's better. Brains are a heart. And after the Tin Man tells this whole story about how he wants a heart so badly, the scarecrow says, he says, well, all the same. Like, nice story, buddy. He says all the same. I shall ask for brains instead of a heart, for a fool would not know what to do with a heart if he had one. He was pretty smart. Yet the tin man said, still, I shall take the heart. For brains do not make one happy. And happiness is the best thing in the world.

This lent, we're not just called to do a little bit more. We're not even called to do a lot more. We're simply invited to let the Lord touch that thing that's inside your chest. to trust him enough to let him touch that thing and engrave his name, engrave his law, and engrave his love on that thing in your chest that so often is unable to stand, unable to move, unable to trust.

But if we choose to trust, then we can be vulnerable, which means we will be able to be hurt, able to be broken, but beyond everything else, we'll be able to love.