Sunday Homilies with Fr. Mike Schmitz - 03/29/26 Autobiography: Owning the Ending

Episode Date: March 28, 2026

Homily from Palm Sunday. It is not my fault, but it is my responsibility. When there is something that we like, we are quick to claim it. When there is something we don't like, we are quick to claim it is not our fault. But our story must end with our becoming like the Father...and the Father bears the marker of adulthood: The Cross. Mass Readings from March 29, 2026: Isaiah 50:4-7 Psalm 22:8-9, 17-20, 23-24Philippians 2:6-11 Matthew 26:14—27:66

Welcome to Sunday homilies with me, Father Mike Schmitz. I hope today's homily inspires and motivates you, and I also hope that it leaves you hungry for the one who gave everything to feed you. If you want to get this in other Sunday Mass resources sent straight to your inbox, sign up at ascensionpress.com slash Sunday, or by texting Sunday to 33777. You can also follow or subscribe on your podcast app for weekly notifications. God bless. So Jesus on his cross or Jesus on the cross.

There's a, it's kind of interesting just the question of Jesus on his cross. The question of whose cross is it? That Jesus is on the cross, but that question keeps coming back to me again and again is like, who is, who is, who does it belong to? Because it's Jesus, it's his cross. You know, I think it's so funny when, um, When there's something we like or something we want, I think a lot of us are quick to claim it. It's like, that's my place in line, that's my parking spot, whatever the thing is, I want that thing.

But when we don't want a thing, I think we're quick to do something else. There was a comic trip back in the day. My mom really liked it. It was a comic trip about a family, and the mom would always complain that there's three extra kids in the house. I don't know, nobody, and not me. My mom really elected. She's like, I have the same kids. Because she'd ask a question, like, who did this?

I don't know. Who made this mess? Nobody. Whose fault is this? Not me. And that was the thing. It's like that sense. That's us, right? How many times is that us? When it comes again, something I don't want, something that's not mine. It's not my, how many times can we look at stuff in life and be like, it's not my fault. It's not my fault. It's not mine. You know, we started this whole lent. We did this, this whole lent we've been doing a series called autobiography. And in this series, we talked about the fact that every life is,

a story. And because every life is a story, every person is an author. And the big question, the big question of life, the big question of the autobiography is, who will you be at the end of the story? Because that's it, right? Every one of us, we're in the process right now of writing our autobiography. We're living our autobiography. And the question, who will you be at the end of the story? We need to own the story. We need to own the ending. And so we've been following the parable of the prodigal son. And you remember the prodigal son? Here's the younger son who leaves in rebellion, but he gets rescued by the father. The older son, who's just full of resentment, and he's invited to be restored by the father. We know that that can be us. So often, that can be us.

That can be our story. Like, yeah, I've turned away from you, Lord, in rebellion. Or I'm in church, but I'm resentful. We know that we can be the younger sons and the younger son or the older son, but we know the goal of the story. The goal is not to be just a rescued son or a restored daughter. The goal is to become like the father. That's the goal of the parable, the prodigal son. And the goal of the spiritual life is to become like the father. Guys, it's not just about perfection. It's about having a heart like him. And if we're going to own the ending, that's our goal. The question, who are you and I? Who are we growing into? To have a heart like his. It means to grow up. Like to just grow up, to become an adult.

You know, that's the question we've asked at the beginning of mass. Like, what is the marker of an adult. You know, other cultures, they have clear markers. You go off, kill a line, you're an adult now. Congratulations. In our culture, what would be the marker? What would be the marker of being adult? Someone would be saying, well, you get, you know, you get your driver's license. Like, oh, maybe, then you meet a 16-year-old, like, no, that is not the marker of adulthood. Maybe you're 18. Now you can, like, buy lot of tickets. Not a marker of adulthood. Maybe you're 21, now you can drink or a small. Maybe graduate in college. Maybe that's the marker. Some people say this, you know, you know you're an adult when you have your first big boy job.

And I think the fact that you use the term big boy job, I don't think so. Like, what is the marker of adulthood? And going through all these things because, you know, to admit, I'm a middle-aged man. Which means that, like most middle-aged men, I'm often preoccupied with stories of World War II. And in that, I think about the men here, the young men here, 18 to 24 years old. I've been spending the last 21 years of my life with guys from 18 to 24 years old. And just you men are so good. Whenever I look at so many of you, I think of like, man, if you're born in the 1940s,

where would you be right now? The men from 17 to 24 and beyond, where were they? They either went off to Europe or they went off to the Pacific, and they did incredible things. Like you hear those stories, like, or the movie Band of Brothers or the book Citizen Soldier, any of those kinds of stories, you're like, oh my gosh, that's, look to your left, you're right, guys, that's men your age. They were adults, but the reality, of course, they weren't any more mature, but they were adults. Why? What was the difference? And I think this. I think the marker of adulthood is this.

Begins right here. The marker of adulthood is a willingness to take responsibility. I think that's the first marker. Whether, whether you're, wherever you're at right now, whether you're called to serve and more. The mark of adulthood is a willingness to take responsibility, which means you can do it at 16 and you can avoid doing it at 42. Because the mark of adulthood is a willingness to take rent. And first, the first step is taking person responsibility, taking responsibility for yourself, because you realize this, that we have to to be an adult means I don't fall into the trap or stay into the trap of blaming others for my problems. Blaming others for my struggles. Blaming others. You know, one again, one of the markers of not

being an adult is always blaming someone else. It's always someone else's fault. A mark of adulthood is a willingness to take responsibility for myself. Another one is this. A mark of adulthood is a willingness to treat yourself like someone who's worth taking care of. It's a of adulthood. Treat yourself as someone who's worth taking care of. You know, we, a couple of years ago, when a psychiatrist come up to talk to the priests and deacons of the diocese. And in his first session, he said this, he stuck with me. He said, one of the hardest things for adults to do is what we were told to do growing up. Two of the hardest things. That is hardest to do for adults is the two things we were always told to do as kids to feed yourself and to put yourself

to bed. Or more accurately, to feed yourself well and put yourself to bed on time. So I'll And not just being like, of course, you're priests, like a bunch of bachelors. No, it's all men, I would like as they say, thank you very much. In fact, I've talked to many married men who, whether they're married only three months or 30 years. They're like, yeah, this is how it goes. My wife, if she leaves to the weekend, leave to the week, she could have it all planned out. She made all my meals already. She put them in Tupperware containers.

She marked them. This is breakfast on Tuesday. This is dinner on Wednesday. And she gets back, and she's like, what did you eat? It has like McDonald's and Domino's. Where'd you sleep? On the couch. Why?

I don't know. Because why? Because two of the hardest things for adults to do is what you had, you needed someone else to tell you growing up. Take care of yourself. You know, because we realize this. A mark of adulthood is to realize

that you're writing the story right now. That we are in the process of co-authoring our autobiography right now. And not as a passive observer, but as an act of participant, I mean, this is one of those things. We often face this temptation in mostly men,

whatever, based on temptation of resist being coming like the Father. We resist becoming like the Father. We're often reluctant to grow up. And we have this temptation. Here's a lot of our temptation. Our temptation is towards passivity. If someone else is going to do it, awesome. If someone else is taking care of it, great.

If I don't have to do anything in the jobs that gets done, praise the Lord. This temptation we have, guys, especially when we look at our life and we say, well it's not my fault though. Look at our circumstances. That's not my fault. Look at our wounds. Our battles, that's not my fault. And this is the thing.

When we have that words, that's not my fault, we have to see. How does the father see it? How does God the father and also the father of the prodigal son? How does he look at life?

What's the heart of the father look like? He can say the same thing. The father says this. He says, no, it's not my fault. But then he goes on to say something more. He says, it's not my fault, but it is my responsibility. And that's our call.

The call for everyone. one of us is to reject passivity and embrace responsibility. That's the first step of becoming like the father. Personal responsibility. Be able to look at our circumstances, look at our wounds, our struggles. You say, okay, maybe it's not my fault, but it is my responsibility. Of course, there's more because, remember, the goals have a heart like the father. Like the father in the parable, not just responsibility for myself, but also responsibility for the people that have been entrusted to me. Again, the marker of having a heart like the father is taking responsibility for the people closest to you. And again, we know this. We're so over-connected right now that we spend

so much emotional energy pretending to be shocked or crushed by the experiences of people that we will never meet. And we miss the people right in front of us. We miss the people God put right in our path. You know, I had a chaplain in college, my priest in college, and Father Kevin. Father Kevin once said something so wise. I was just like, oh, that's awesome. Right? Write it down. He said this. He said the person, it was advice for like people dating or even just who you want as your friends. He said this. He said the person who's nice to you, but not nice to the waiter is not a nice person. I'm like, oh, that's good. The person was nice to you but not nice to waiter is not a nice person. I think that's true. But also, I came across someone teaching the other day a couple weeks ago and it just struck me so deeply. I was like, this is also true. He said this. While it's important to be kind to the stranger, he said that's not the measure. He said this. You can be kind to animals. kind to the paper boy, kind to every stranger who crosses your path. But kindness to strangers is not the measure of our character. Kindness at home is the real test.

He says because strangers don't carry our history. Strangers don't activate our wounds. Strangers don't mirror back the parts of us that we've avoided for years, but our spouse does and our children do and our home does. He said that's the uncomfortable truth that most people dodge. If all your graciousness is saved for strangers, that's not kindness, that's image management. The real measure of who we are isn't the polite smile we give to the grocery clerk. It's the tone we use to our spouse who loves us.

It's the patience we offer to the children are overwhelmed. It's the softest we choose on the days our egos want to snap. And he said, in conclusion, he said, kindness to strangers might make people like you. Kindness to your spouse makes you trustworthy. Kindness of strangers creates an image, but kindness at home creates a person of character. And if we're kind everywhere except our own house, that is not kindness, that's performance. That's image management dressed up as virtue. What we're called to is we're called to love the people closest to us.

Of course, the temptation there, when it takes responsibility for the people around us, the temptation there is to make it all about me. The temptation there is like, I have to be the one to fix it. And I imagine there's people in your life right now if I just fixed them, they'd be perfect. My roommate would be amazing if I could just tweak. My spouse would be incredible. If I could just like control, that's the temptation.

The temptation, original temptation is passivity. We need to reject passivity and embrace responsibility. But some of us here have a temptation towards control. And the temptation, and the call there is not. not to reject control and embrace passivity, it's to reject control and embrace trust. I mean, think of the father and the parable. The father in the parable of prodigal son, he knows where his sons are. He could go and just fix them, but he doesn't. He knows exactly what they need. But he also knows that he can't control them. He has to trust that when they

come back, he'll be ready. You know what the father in the parable doesn't spend time doing? You know what he doesn't waste time doing? He doesn't waste time asking the question, whose fault is this? I think that's important for us. That's how God looks too. God is not bothering with this question because what does he declare? He declares the truth.

It's not my fault, but it is my responsibility. And we're invited to have that same declaration. It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility. Because the reality, of course, is that it's not no one's fault. Let's be honest. The question at the beginning, we asked, like, whose cross is that?

There's an answer. whose cross is Jesus carrying? Whose fault is that? There's an answer, and I'll tell you the truth. If you were to ask me, Father Mike, whose cross is that? The true answer is, it's mine. If you were to see Jesus on the cross right here in front of us,

and you were to ask me, Father Mike, whose fault is that? The truth is, it's mine. And if I were to ask you, whose fault is it? and you were to answer, honestly, in truth, you would have to also say, it's mine. I don't know how many of you ever watched the movie The Passion of the Christ. If you've seen it, you know, it's written, co-written, and directed by Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson is an actor, but it's funny because Mel Gibson doesn't show up in the movie.

He doesn't act in the... He's actually in one scene in the passion. You might know it. It's the scene where Jesus is being nailed to the cross. the hands you see in a close-up, the hands that are doing the nailing, the hands of the Roman guard, nailing Jesus' hands to the cross.

Those are Mel Gibson's hands because he knew the truth. He knows the truth. Whose fault is that? It's his. Whose cross is that? It's his. Because reality, of course,

God himself, our father, Jesus himself, could look out over the world and look at the sin of the world. And God could say this. He could say, are you kidding me? I made this world completely. good. That's not my fault. He could say about us, I gave my kids everything

they possibly could want and they ran away from me. God looks at us and he could easily look at our brokenness. He could easily look at our woundedness. He could easily look at our sin and say, that's not my fault. But the heart of us, the father says it's not my fault, but it is my responsibility. And that

heart has to become our heart. If we're going to own the ending of our story, his heart has to become our heart. This is the last thing. Again, because of this, our story can't simply end at being a rescued daughter or a restored son.

We have to do what Paul said to the Glacians. In Galatian chapter 6, Paul said this. He said, bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ. See, but my brother's burdens that's not my fault. You're right. It's not your fault. But their burdens might be your responsibility.

Because who we become at the end of the story is crucial. We have to become like the Father. We have a heart like the Father, heart that sees other people's wounds and sees other people's brokenness and sees other people's needs and responds like the father. Not with passivity, now with control, but where we can see the people closest to us, see the people entrusted to us and say what the Father says.

What Christ declares, it's not my fault, but it is my responsibility. Imagine owning the ending like that. Imagine ending the story like that. Ending the story like that, that would be a great autobiography.