Sunday Homilies with Fr. Mike Schmitz - 11/17/19 CompariSIN: Stealing Joy

Episode Date: November 18, 2019

Homily from the Thirty-third Sunday in Ordinary Time. If comparison is a thief of joy, then we have to learn how to steal it back. In the battle to escape the comparison trap, we can become invincible to bad comparison by actively looking for the blessings, giving thanks, and inviting others into celebrating them. Because there are some things worth celebrating. Mass Readings from November 17, 2019: Malachi 3:19-20 Psalms 98:5-92 Thessalonians 3:7-12 Luke 21:5-19 Download the Homily Study

So maybe I might mention this a lot that I will do a lot of like I'll do a lot of marriage preps Like it's kind of a it's kind of a favorite thing I get to do I don't do a lot of weddings I got to do a wedding yesterday And it's one of those it was awesome beautiful couple beautiful wedding beautiful party although things beautiful But I can't help but think whenever I go to a wedding like I'm looking at the whole thing and like everything right because the music is like big and The wedding party is like extravagant and here's this all this stuff and I have this sense I'm overwhelmed by it. It doesn't even something I choose it's just a reflex I go isn't this a little much?

Like you look at everything, I'm just like, I think it's a little much. I think we could tone it down a little bit. I think because there's so many. You know, you're like, Father jerkface, what the heck? But there's something about this that like, again, I like, I'm a big fan of marriage, right? But all of the, all of the complicated things that go into putting on a wedding, like all the cost that goes into putting on a wedding, all the stress that goes into being part of a wedding, like all of that. I'm just like, I tell couples almost semi-regularly, I'm like, you guys, in your, in your,

in marriage prep, like if you want, we could do, you could elope. Like, just skip the wedding part. Like, come in on a Tuesday, bring your parents, and it'll be nice. And the little small ceremony in the garage. We can get this thing hammered out, like, really easily, really quickly for almost free. I mean, I'm very cheap. And I'm kind of only semi-joking. Semi-joking. Because the reality, of course, is that the reason why weddings are worth having.

Like, weddings are worth having for a couple reasons. Here are three reasons. One is because your wedding day is not about you. Your wedding's not about you, right? You called to vocation of marriage means you're called in a particular way to live out your discipleship of Jesus. So my ordination day was not about me. It wasn't like, let's celebrate Mike. It's about let's celebrate with the church that one of ours has been called to live out his vocation to follow Jesus in this way.

So same thing with your wedding day. It's the day that you're called to like enter into that vocation of being a living sign of the Trinity in the way. the world. So it's not your day. It's the church's day. Second thing is, I really like, it's really good for a couple to go through like the planning together, figure out how that works. Like, for a couple to plan an event together is like, oh, really, I thought you were a person who followed through on their stuff. Like, apparently I'm not, okay? That's who you're marrying. It's really good for couples to try to plan an event together because then they realize, like, we need to work on this. And the third thing is, maybe the biggest reason, I'm not sure if it's

the biggest reason. The one that stick with me right now is it's really great to have a wedding. Because there are some things that are just worth celebrating. Like at the end of the day, there's some things that are just worth stopping and saying, like, let's celebrate this reality. Let's celebrate this fact. And again, not because you're the best couple ever, not because this is the most gorgeous wedding ever. Not even because you're a better couple than anyone else, or there's another couple worse than you. But just because this is good. And good things, good things are worth celebrating.

Not just the best things and not just the better things, but good things are worth celebrating. This is the last part of, we can go into this series on comparison for a month. And we recognize that, right? The demon, the enemy of comparison, the lie, the battle of comparison in us, is not just taking joy. We talked about this, not just taking joy in being beautiful or being smart or being talented or being wealthy or successful. Those are all good things. The enemy of comparison takes joy in being more beautiful, is being smarter, is being more successful, is being more talented than someone else. That's where the comparison takes its joy in that.

And because of that, like every person, if we give in to that lie of comparison, that enemy of comparison, that trap of comparison, everyone we meet is a potential threat because it's not just enough to have something good, I need to have something better. Not just enough to be someone good, I need to be someone better than someone else. And so we realize that to walk down that road of comparison

is to live a joyless life. Right, Teddy Roosevelt, that quote that we kicked off the whole series with, Teddy Roosevelt saying, comparison is the thief of joy. And if I'm going to walk that road at the comparison trap, I'm in constant danger of my joy being stolen. So the first week we talked about how to fight against it is to open yourself up to vulnerability,

to walk in the identity of being a son or daughter of Jesus. The second week we talked about the reality is that we have this desire to be loved more or preferred more, but you're infinitely loved already. You're infinitely preferred already. And then last week we talked about, yes, there are some comparison that can condemn us, but there's other comparisons that can inspire us.

And inspire us to do what? Inspire us to paint the sunrise as good as we can, not as good as someone else can. But the only real comparison is, how are you following Jesus today, better than you follow Jesus yesterday? That's kind of the walk we've walked so far. And we can go on and on and on right about this series.

I don't know if it's been helpful for you. Hopefully it's been helpful for you, but I talk to so many people are like, okay, this is exactly what I need, this is how I live. We can keep this. This could be a double shot series. You know, it could go on and on and on.

But this is the last one. And so it was like, I was thinking, like, what is it we need to do to complete this? What do we need to talk about to conclude this whole thing? Because when we're done with this weekend, we'll still live in this world where we still want to be better. Or there's still a comparison. And where comparison will steal our joy. So I just came to the conclusion that, okay, it comes down to this. if comparison is the thief of joy,

then you and I have to learn how to steal it back. That if comparison is the thief of joy, then you and I have to become experts at stealing joy back. We need to learn how to steal joy. I'm talking about this is there's three steps. I think there's three steps to stealing joy back from comparison. The first step is we have to look for it. Like not just look for joy.

We have to look for the gifts. Like we have to look for the areas in your life. We're already you have gifts. We're already you are blessed. You know, it's funny. Today is the close of deer season. in Minnesota for a rifle? I got that right, correct?

Well, it's close. It's close. People have been hunting recently. And I think about this, you know, there's one thing to go for a walk in the woods and, like, if you happen to see an animal, like, oh, nice. So another thing is to go for a walk in the woods with a gun. Because when you walk in the woods, you see an animal, oh, that's nice. I happen to come upon an animal.

When you're walking through the woods with a gun, you're like, I'm looking for game. Like, I'm looking, I know what I'm here looking for. He's kind of like a kid I was talking to recently. He says, when he reads his Bible, he says, I always read my Bible with my highlighter in my hand. He says, because I could just meander through the Bible, but he says, I know God wants to speak to me every single time I pick up the Bible. And so I read the Bible with my highlighter in my hand because I'm ready. God, you're talking to me already, so I'm ready to underline. I'm ready to highlight.

I'm ready to mark down where you're talking to me. So he's actively looking, right? And he knows where to look. I was talking to a friend of mine. And she said that when she was growing up, she and her brother, when their mom was out of the house, they'd be just, we're so hungry, we're starving. There's no food in the house. And they'd be complaining when their mom came home, like, Mom, there is no food here.

We're so hungry. She said, in 20 minutes, she would have gone to, like, the pantry, into the fridge, into the freezer, and would have collected all the ingredients and have made, like, a whole meal. Like, the food was there. But she knew where to look. And that's the big thing for us. If we're going to steal joy back from comparison, we need to look. We also need to know where to look.

The question is, where are you looking? St. Paul and his letter to the Thessalonians today, he says, you know, there's some people here in the community, there's some people here, you're not keeping busy, you're being busy bodies, basically meeting, you're looking at someone else's lane. Like you're not running your own race. You're just so busy being preoccupied with what someone else has, you keep missing what you have. And one of the first rules when they teach you out to drive a car, they say, okay, keep your eyes on the road. Why? Because your car will go where your eyes are looking. And that's the same thing about our hearts. Same thing is true for our hearts. Your heart will follow where your eyes are looking. Where are you looking?

Are you happily looking at someone else's gifts and saying, that's awesome, that's something to rejoice on? Or am I actively looking for like, God, we're all the ways that you blessed me. You know, so funny. A couple weeks ago, we were in the Gospel of Luke for the last year. And a couple weeks ago, we had Luke 15. If you remember this, it's the three parables that Jesus tells about the lost things.

So it's the lost sheep, it's the lost coin, and then the lost son. Remember that? The prodigal son. We had it a couple weeks ago. And it's interesting, in every one of those stories, whether a lost sheep or a lost coin to the lost son, the protagonist of the story is looking.

Like he's actively looking. See, the shepherd, he's actively looking for that lost sheep. You have the woman who lost her coin. She's actively looking. She's like, she wants to find it because I know it's here. And then you have the father, right? And it says when the son decides to come home, his father was watching for him.

He was looking for him. So if we want to steal joy back from comparison, we have to look. We have to know what we're looking for. Because when we look for it, the thing, and we find it, we have the next movement, which is we give thanks. When we find the thing, you see the thing,

we just, the second move, to steal joy back is to give thanks. So there's this restaurant in Northeast Minneapolis called Gastafzeggumiglachite. It's fun to say. Maybe you know it as Gastafzoste if you've been down in northeast Minneapolis. Gastafzeggimikikite, it's a German restaurant. It's owned by this man named Mario, who is a Polish immigrant.

And I love this because I love talking about the German restaurant owned by a Polish immigrant with an Italian name. So Mario at one point, he's Polish, and so he found out I was a seminarian when I was in the seminary 20 years ago, and he sat down with me and my family for like two and a half hours. He knows my brother-in-law, and he's just telling me his story of his life and talking about how he came to the United States when he was 24 years old, didn't speak a word of English.

He had a wife and two kids, and he said, I started as a dishwasher. Then I became a short order cook. Then I became this and this. And he said, look, now I own my own restaurant. It's super cool. And I was like, yeah. And I was trying to, like, and it's amazing too.

Like, Mario, this restaurant is packed. So I was looking out over the whole restaurant and it seems like just you couldn't fit any more people. And he's like, ah, that's where you're wrong. He said, what do you mean? He said, everyone says, all Mario, you do so well. This restaurant is full. And he says, you look out and you see all the people who are sitting in the chairs.

He said, I look out at the same restaurant and I see all the empty chairs. And I know that every one of those empty chairs is costing me like $40 an hour. So it ruins my night because all I see is the empty chairs. And I realized he told that to me 20 years ago and almost not a Sunday goes by that I don't think that exact same thing. When people say, Father Mass was pack tonight and I'm like, hmm, all I saw was the empty chairs. All I thought was there's 14,000 people on campus and there's three in the front of another

one, another one, all these empty chairs. And I realized that is the wrong way to think. wrong, I'm looking at the wrong thing because you're here. It might be fine for Mario to see the empty chair because that's money. But it is wrong, 100% wrong for me to focus on the empty chair and not to focus on you. Like this is, you are here. You're a reason to rejoice.

Now I don't just mean all of you are here. I mean you. The fact that the seat next to you might be empty, but the fact that your seat is taken right now, that's worth celebrating. Like you existing, He's worth selling you being here tonight, even if it was just you, that would be 100% worth saying, let's have the best mass possible. Because it's the attitude of, a person who can steal joy has an attitude of abundance, right? The attitude that says, I see what I have, not what I don't have.

Because we can look at ourselves and it's the comparison thing, like, ah, but I don't have as much as this person, I'm not as much as this person, I'm not as far as I want to go. that's the attitude of scarcity, but an attitude of abundance says, like, look at all that I do have. Look at the who God has made me to be. I might not be where I should be, but wow, I have gone so far from where I was. And to be able to look at that, to notice it, to give thanks for it. Because you realize, we realize the day will come. This is painful.

The day will come when we would give anything to have exactly what you have right now. The day is going to come in every one of our lives when we would give anything. to go back to have exactly what you and I have right now. Not more than we have now, but exactly what we have right now. The date would come, we'll come, when we would give anything to go back, to have the stuff we complain about now, to be able to say, oh my gosh, for the hassle, I would give anything to be able to go back. You know, it's funny, two weeks from now, Thanksgiving.

My family, we do this thing where every other Thanksgiving, we go to Brainerd, and then on the odd Thanksgiving, we go to, my brother's house in North Carolina. So this upcoming Thanksgiving is a brother's house in North Carolina Thanksgiving. And I'm excited about it. I love my brother. I'm not excited about the travel. I like going to Brainer.

It's two hours away. Have a home room? Oh my gosh, you guys. It's the best. There's 25 people in my family. I can go up to that room and shut the door and I'm alone. And they knock on the door. I don't have to answer.

It's great. It's awesome. But we go to North Carolina and I'm like, this is fun. But it's sometimes a little bit like, ugh. Like, no, it's great. And I'm looking forward to it, like, honestly. But sometimes I just kind of have that sense of like, it's good, it's really awesome.

But, ugh. And I realize something is true. But the reason why I am not, like, overjoyed about it is because I have this weird thinking. I imagine that it's just going to go on forever. I imagine that this is always going to be how it is. In my mind, I know it's not true, but I have this imagination that tells me that, no, like, forever and ever, never. I'll go down to North Carolina and it'll be the same people. It's super awesome, super fun. This might be the last year it ever happens. The same people might never be there ever again.

And that day would come when we would give anything to be able to go back and have what we go, ugh, about now. So there's an attitude of abundance, but there's also this attitude of scarcity, because when we realize it is not guaranteed forever, we realize, oh my gosh, this is so valuable. I need to see it, and I need to give thanks. I need to give thanks. I hesitate, though. I so often hesitate giving thanks because I realize it's kind of like not forever. Like, it's a weird thing inside me

where it's like it's not forever, so it's valuable, but it's not forever, so let's not get too excited about it. I know it's going to be passing. I mean, think about this. In the parables, when the shepherd finds the sheep, he's like, come rejoice with me. He's like, let's give thanks

that I found the stupid sheep that ran away. Like the woman who finds the coin, she says, rejoice with me. She wants to give thanks, not because she's going to have that coin forever, because she has it right now. The shepherd doesn't give thanks because he's going to have that sheep forever,

but because I have it right now. The father says, let us celebrate. My son was dead. Now he's alive. And he doesn't say, I want to give thanks because I know I'm going to have my son with me forever. He says, I have my son with me now, and that's the reason why I need to celebrate.

But too often, too often I realize that there have been times in my life when I could have stolen joy. I could have taken it back. Like I completely could have stolen. I would have been if it would have changed everything.

If I would have been willing to look for the thing and see it and give thanks for it, and I could have stolen joy, would it change anything? And the only difference would have been the fact that I looked, the fact that I gave thanks. And this third piece, this last piece. Because if we're going to steal joy from comparison, we not only have to look for the blessings,

not only give thanks for those things, we have to invite people into them. We have to be willing to invite people into our joy. You know, the gospel, again, Luke's gospel from a couple weeks ago, his father says, let's get everyone together. We got it. I have this blessing in my life. I need you to come and celebrate with me.

Here's the younger son. Imagine how embarrassing that'd be. Sometimes you're like, I don't like people making a big deal out of me. I know. You guys, oh gosh. You are. Some of you are very difficult to love. Here's the name.

You explain it. Not because you're hard to love. You're hard. Some of you are resistant to, like, letting people make a big deal out of you. I don't need, I'm not even talking about a big deal. Like, I'll compliment your shirt or something.

You ever do this, you comment someone's shirt, like, oh yeah, well, I got it for sale, whatever, it was no big deal. Like, listen, take the freaking compliment. What the heck? Like, if we've ever had a conversation, I have commented on your hair. I mean, let's get it out there right now. If we've ever talked, I've said, oh, nice hair good.

And then what people do, they always deflect. The more clever of the deflectors say something like, I didn't get it, I got them all cut. And the last time I heard that, it was already so old, I fill off my dinosaur. Like what, I mean, it's just a way to deflect it, as opposed to, like, receive it. Do you know, we don't let people celebrate us.

Imagine here's the younger son. And the father's like, let's celebrate fatted cap, bring everyone in. He's like, oh, I'm no big deal, I'm no big. You guys, people want to honor you. we're so worried about the comparison what do people think like i'm kind of a loser they're better than me i don't want them to celebrate me and so we refuse to be invited we refuse to be celebrated but if you're going to actually steal joy back from comparison you have to let people when they want to

make a big deal out of you you have to let them make a big deal out of you so the father he could say well we'll see about the son he doesn't he says no celebrate with me the son can say well i don't deserve any of this. He said, no, just okay I guess I'll let you celebrate me. The older son, he's invited in because there's there's downward comparison. There's upward comparison. Downward comparison, I'm better than you. Upper comparison, you're better than me. The older son, hey come on into the party. Come into the, he actually experienced the joy, receive it, like live it right now. If we're going to become, when we become a community joy back, if you're going to become people who steal joy back from comparison, it means

every single one of us has to do all three of those things. You have to hunt down the blessings, not just in your life, but in the lives of the people next to you, like to notice them, and then to give thanks for those things. And then be willing to say, let's celebrate. No, you guys, I'm the worst of this. I don't celebrate at all. I'm German. I'm like, get back to work. We're going to get this thing done. Actong, max, no waste. I am the worst at celebrating. But I want to be better.

Why? Because I don't want to let comparison to continue to steal my joy. I want to rob comparison. I want to steal joy back. Stealing joy is an active thing. It means you've said comparison is not an option. It means I'm saying I've made this decision. I'm going to consistently choose to hunt down, to focus,

to look for blessings in your life as well as in my life. I've decided I'm committed to celebrating and like to honor, to praising, to thanking God for the blessings in your life, as well as in my life. And is making that decision to say, I'm going to invite people into this celebration. Because the people who have learned how to steal joy are people who have learned how to celebrate each other. They've learned how to celebrate each other. They've learned how to be celebrated. And they've learned how to let themselves be invited into the celebration.

This is the last thing. That's one of the reasons why it's really good to have weddings. because when you have a wedding, you get to make a guest list, which is one of the most difficult tasks for couples. But what an honor. Who are the people we're going to invite into our joy? Who are the people we're going to invite to celebrate what God has done in our lives? Who are the people that we're going to let be part of this celebration?

But they're going to come together and share in our joy. There are some things that are worth celebrating, not because they're better or because they're the best, but because they're good. You are one of those things. You are one of those people who is worth celebrating. Not because you're the best, not because you're better,

but because you are good, and good things are worth celebrating. Hi, this is Father Mike. I just wanted to take one moment to thank you. I hope that this series on comparison has been a blessing to you. I know that it has for our community. It's one of those kind of things where we had looked around at, you know, just the group of us here on campus, the number of students on campus, and I've said, you know, this is one of those things that can be infectious, right? It's been one of those things that can get inside these friendships that can get inside the walls of the community.

It can get inside, in between people and just divide people. And so we're praying to the Lord to continue to remedy those kinds of things. and so we had to talk about it. I hope that it was also a blessing for you because my guess is that comparison is in your life. So I hope it's been a blessing. I know that you have been a blessing to me. You've been a blessing to us on campus.

Thank you for your prayers. Please keep them up. This last week we had to give to the Max Day, and that was a massive, massive blessing from people locally who support the ministry to people abroad, people in other countries, people across the country. I am so grateful because of what you've done, because of your generosity,

we'll be able to continue to do this evangelistic work on campus, continue to reach out to students who are far from the Lord, continue to reach out to students who just need to be brought back to Christ, that lost sheep, that wayward child who just has been being invited home. Again, because of your generosity, we still have donations coming in. It's not a thing like, wait, I missed that Thursday. We have donations coming in. We always can use it, obviously. There's always going to be a donate button on the website.

I'm grateful for that. But the main part of this little word at the end of this homily is just to say thank you so much. We're overwhelmed. I'm overwhelmed. I realize when someone, you know, $5 comes in, $25 comes in, and we realize that's money someone worked hard for. that someone, yeah, went to work. And now you're saying, I believe in this ministry so much that I'm going to give it. I'm going to part with it for myself so that someone else can use it for something.

And thank you so much for believing in this ministry. Thank you for entrusting your hard-earned money to us so we can use it. We use it all for ministry. We use it all to be able to build up the community on campus to reach those who are lost. and to bring back those who have strayed. It is not wasted on us. It is not wasted on me that you didn't have to do that. I'm very grateful.

So please know of my continued prayers. And please continue to pray for me and continue to pray for our community on campus. We'll continue to pray for each other. And thank you so much. God bless.