Sunday Homilies with Fr. Mike Schmitz - 12/01/19 Before Goodbye

Episode Date: December 1, 2019

Homily from the First Sunday of Advent. We do not know when, but we do know what. Goodbyes can be painful. But what makes goodbyes even more painful is when we are not ready for the leaving or letting go. The goodness of the goodbye comes down to what we do with the time before goodbye. Mass Readings from December 1, 2019: Isaiah 4:2-6 Psalms 122:1-9Romans 13:11-14 Matthew 24:37-44

Hi, this is Father Mike Schmitz. Thank you for listening to this podcast. This is going to be one of those kind of special podcasts where it's just you and me in a room because we have this massive storm up here in Duluth, actually over most of Minnesota this weekend, Thanksgiving weekend, and it's just been chaos. And so, like, campus was shut down, so we couldn't go on to Mass for campus. We had packed all of our students who were still in town, who made it back to town, into our little chapel and I thought, you know what, I'm just going to record this special

for the podcast audience. So here it is the first Sunday of Advent 2019 year A, year A, hey, guys, happy New Year. So as I was, I guess said, it's first Sunday of Advent, it's Thanksgiving weekend. Last weekend, I got to spend a lot of time with my family, as I mentioned two weeks ago, and a different homily. Got to visit my brother, his wife. I had a bunch of, you know, my little brother was there. I had other siblings.

I had my parents. I had nieces and nephews. It was so good. And then it ended. And the ending is the worst. I know there's a lot of memes out there. People like saying like, oh, you know, family is really hard over the holidays. That's not actually a meme.

That's just people observing things. But it was so good. It was so good to see them. And then it ended, as I said. I don't know if you, I know, I know I've mentioned. this before, but myself, I am not good at goodbyes. I kind of rush goodbyes because I don't know if I get uncomfortable with them or because I, I don't know. I'm not sure exactly why. I'm going to take it to prayer later on. Don't worry about that. But it's unusual because in Minnesota,

we do not rush goodby. So Minnesota, we have this thing called the Minnesota goodbye. You might have heard about this. So here's what I'm going to explain to you what the Minnesota goodbye looks like. It might also be known as like the Midwestern goodbye. I'm not sure if other places have the same kind of goodbye. But I'll let you know this. When I'm I was describing this to the students who were at Mass tonight, they were roaring hilariously or they were laughing at it because they were like, yes, this is completely us. So if you just think this is me, it's not just me. It's all of us.

So there's like nine stages to the Minnesota goodbye. And the first one is this. It starts with Welp. Sometimes you know the Welp, so it's kind of like this sense of like, here's my cue that initiates the whole countdown for we're about to say goodbye now. Now sometimes it doesn't just the whelp. Sometimes it's a big sigh when it's going to like, ah, okay, whelp, and sometimes it's the slapping of the legs. So you imagine

someone sitting down, they're talking, and someone's like, okay, and or, okay, well, sometimes all three are combined. I'm not sure if you can get the gist of what I'm trying to say right now through the miracle of audio, but you get it, right? Sometimes it's all three. The welp, a big sigh and the slap of the legs like a, uh, welp, welp, slap. It's great. But then that's not, that's not goodbye. That's just the beginning. You just initiated the goodbye sequence because after that are the hugs. You know, you get up, start giving hugs and then you're not, you're nowhere near. Goodbye yet. This is now, now you're next to the doorway. But you're not, you don't leave the doorway. You chat some more. And then the, the second

kind of whelp is not whelp. It's, ah, you know, guys, it's getting like we really should get going. It's the, we've been standing here at the door talking for so long that I need to remind, We need to remind the group of us why we're standing by the door. So you say, you know, well, we really sure you get going. Then followed by round two of the hugs, because that's what you do. Hugs more hugs. Like, oh, yeah, yeah. So, you know, because it's been so long since you hug the first time, it might be an hour.

Like, that's not an exaggeration. You might have been standing at the doorway hugging, or not hugging, talking for an hour. You have the second round of hugs. And then you have, like, the hand of the doorknob, and then you have, like, the doors open. You're still standing there talking. And then you have the window wave. The window wave is very important. Window wave. All the students were unanimous. I was like, is this just me where you're pulling out and you look out the window of the car to make sure that people are standing in the window of their house waving to you goodbye? And that's a very important thing. Because why? We have this Minnesota goodbye. And goodbyes are so, uh, goodbyes can be so difficult, right? Because when you have to leave. Okay, when it comes down, you're like, okay, now you have to go. Or when you have to let go. Or when you have to let go.

I think it's so interesting. This weekend, again, I was taken by surprise by one of the goodbyes. My little brother, he left a day earlier than all the rest of us. And I was like, wait, I got up and he was taking his luggage out to his car. And I was like, whoa, wait, are you leaving today? And I wasn't ready. And I could say like, well, you never told me, you know. But the reality is he shouldn't have to tell me.

I should, I truly, this is how it, I had. four days with him, I should just be ready. Like, I should be ready to say goodbye. I should be ready to let him leave or I should be ready to let go. But I wasn't ready. Because I didn't take that time before goodbye to get ready to say goodbye. And so interesting, you know, the gospel today is Jesus saying, you know, here's what's going to happen. The son of men will come back. And when he comes back, you have to be ready. You have to be ready. Yes, ready for the hello, ready to meet your Lord face to face,

but also ready for the goodbye. Ready for all the people that you're going to have to. Because we know this, right? This is the truth of the matter. Is that Advent, this season of Advent, is a preparation. Preparation to celebrate, obviously, Christmas. But it's also preparation to get ready for Christ's return. Or even to get ready.

for our return to him, where we get to see him face to face. And Jesus is so clear in the gospel today, he's not, he's like, listen, it's not going to come when you know. It's not going to come on a date you expect. But I do want you to be ready to do this. Even St. Paul, what's he say? He says, now is the time for you to wake from sleep. I want you to be ready, cast off the works of darkness, put on the Lord Jesus Christ, because here's the problem.

You don't know when, but you know what. Right? We know, every one of us knows there's going to be a day that's going to come and might be sooner. Might be sooner rather than later where we're going to have to say goodbye. We're going to have to say goodbye. We're going to have to leave or to let go. We're going to have to stand in front of the Lord. And again, we don't know when, but we do know what. You and I, it's not going to be a surprise.

be a surprise. Jesus shouldn't have to tell us, here's when it's going to happen. We should just be ready. But I don't take that time. I mean, here's that. I don't take that time before goodbye to be ready. I was wondering about this. I was thinking like, why is it that Minnesota, go back to the Minnesota goodbye, why is it that Minnesotans have this stereotype? Why do we have this cliche that in so many ways is real? Like, why are we not ready to say goodbye? And I wonder if it's as a kind of a whole, generally speaking, that we don't really do before goodbye well. Like, because, you know, every one of us, I think we stand next to each other during that, like the whelp and the hugs and they stand by the door and we have these conversations

because we were like, I realize I've had four days with you and I haven't said what I needed to say. You ever have that happen? You're like, ah, we're dragging this out. We're dragging out this goodbye because there's so. So much I want to say and I haven't said it yet. And so I'm just, I'm prolonging this goodbye because it's just like, I haven't done what I needed to do.

I haven't said what I needed to say. And I think we draw it out because no one has, no one's taken care of that time before goodbye to do what needs to happen. So here's my invitation. My invitation is this, in Jesus, he made it clear. Here's what we can expect. We don't know when. But we do know what?

What do you need to say? To say it. Like what would you, what would you need to do before goodbye to be ready to say goodbye? Say it. What are the gifts that God has given to you that just haven't used them yet? They're in your life right now and they've been entrusted to you. I just haven't used them. You know, in this, we heard Matthews Gospel today, where there's two out in a field, the one

taken one left and there's two women grinding meal in the mill and one is taken one is left. In Luke's gospel, he actually says, one will be taken out in the field. Don't run back to the house to get your stuff or two people on the roof of a house. Don't run down into the house to grab your stuff. Just be ready to let go. So what are the gifts you have that I don't want to let go of these gifts? Why? Because I haven't used them like I should be using them. So again, what do I need to say that I haven't said? What are the gifts that I need to use that I haven't used yet? Here's the big thing. Who are the people in my life that I need to be loving and I haven't loved them the right way yet? You know, because this time before goodbye, being willing to let go is not

about not caring. It's not about like, I don't care. I can just let this go. It's about having cared enough that the important things have been used. It's about caring enough that the important words have been said. It's not about not caring. I can leave you now. It's about caring enough that the people you love, they actually have been loved. You've done it. You made that change.

Because that's the last piece here. So what are the words that you need to say you haven't said yet? What are the gifts that you've been given? You haven't used yet. What are the people you've loved? you haven't loved yet. And where are you heading down a path that just, it needs to be changed, that course needs to be corrected because that's what Advent is as well.

It's a season of repentance. It's a season to actually change our course. Jesus, again, he doesn't tell us when, but he does tell us what. And one of the whats we need to do is, I need to get ready. There are things in my life that can't be in my life. So how can I change? Because I do not know the day. I do not know the hour.

I do not know when, but I do know what. What am I going to do before goodbye to be ready for goodbye? Some of you may have heard this already up here in the Diocese of Duluth in Minnesota. This morning, this morning, our bishop, Bishop Paul Serba, he passed away. Young, 59 years old, I believe. And incredible. That's an incredible man. I always described, I mean, we've described him beforehand,

before here on this podcast as I describe him as a carpeted wall or like iron wrapped in velvet. So carpeted wall meaning like you walk up to the carpet on the wall and you're like, oh, soft and you push against you're like, oh, this is not going anywhere. Bishop Serba, man, he was so strong. It's so gentle with so many people. And every person I've ever talked to who had met Bishop Serba said he just, when he's talking to you, when you're talking to him, there is no one else in the room. He is locked in on you. He cares so much. He has been just the gift of a shepherd. And this morning at 9 a.m. December 1st, 2019, he died. And I was thinking about that. I'm thinking about I had meeting with him last Tuesday, and he looked super fit.

When I said goodbye to him, I remember shaking his hand. Shook his hand twice because why? Minnesota goodbyes. I don't hug my bishop. I shook his hand. So we shook hands twice because the conversation went on that long. But I remember thinking, even as I saying goodbye to him, like, Bishop, I'm just so grateful for you. Thanks for taking the time to meet with me and have a great Thanksgiving. And I know he has so many family members who love him down to the Twin Cities.

So many former parishioners who love him in the Twin Cities all throughout the diocese today. I just saw so many messages. My phone was blowing up with friends and people who love me reaching out. But I think about this last night, Bishop Serba did not go to bed thinking, in 12 hours, I will be dead. I just think about that. Last night, when he's getting ready for bed, I was like, we're not that close. I don't know his like nighttime protocol habits, but I guess he brushes his teeth because

he seemed to have nice teeth. But 12 hours, you know, last night he didn't go to bed thinking in 12 hours I'll be dead. When he got up this morning, I know he made a holy hour. And I have a good sense that when he's making that a holy hour, he didn't think after this holy hour. I'm going to go out to my car and I'm going to have a good sense. have a heart attack and I'm going to see Jesus. He didn't know when, but he knew what. This is, this is so key, this is going to happen. This is going to happen for every one of us.

I mean, I'm like, oh my gosh, this is going to happen for every one of us. I saw this online from a priest a couple of weeks ago, and I'm going to butcher it. I'm going to just paraphrase it because it just struck me as, it's so profound. I just wrote it down and said the day's going to come for every one of us when we either enter into God's presence never to leave it or we leave God's presence never to reenter

think about that the day is going to come for every one of us when either we will start praising God never to stop praising Him or we will stop praising God never to resume giving Him praise ever again so how do you get ready for that Like, how do you get ready for that moment of letting go to the one, grabbing onto the other?

How do you get ready for this? We have practiced entering God's presence. I mean, here's bishop, my bishop. He practiced on a daily basis. He went into God's presence. He went before Jesus in the Eucharist on a regular basis. That's practice because he knew the day is going to come when I will enter into the presence of love and never have to leave ever again.

And the day is going to go. come, or the days is going to come, when I will leave the presence of love and never, ever return to his presence ever again. See, this time before goodbye is so absolutely crucial, because that is coming for every single one of us. Jesus has told us what, but he hasn't told us when, and so here's a thing. What do I need to say that I haven't said? Who do I need to ask for forgiveness? that I haven't asked for it. Who do I need to give forgiveness, that I have not yet given forgiveness? Who in my life needs to know that I love them and I haven't told them?

What are the gifts that God has given me? He's going to ask for them back and I haven't used them yet. Who are the people in my life that God is saying, just love them? And where are those things in my life that Jesus is saying, cast off the deeds of darkness, put on the armor of light, put on Christ Jesus. Like, get rid of those things. You have to convert now. I have to change my life now because I do not know when, but I do know what.

And so before that when, I need to get ready for before goodbye. Because at the end, when I have to leave or I have to let go, when I have to say goodbye, I want to enter into the presence of love and never have to leave again. I want to begin praising God, knowing that I never have to stop again. I want to be able to get ready before goodbye so that when that day comes, when that when happens. Like my bishop, I can enter into the presence of God and never have to leave. That's what this advent is about. I do not know when, but I do know what. And so what do I need to do to be ready before goodbye?